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Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here. I thought I made myself

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Speaker 1: perfectly clear. When you're a guest in my home, you

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Speaker 1: gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests,

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Speaker 1: your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff,

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Speaker 1: So how do you dare to surbey me?

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Speaker 2: Welcome to I said, no, gift sits me, Bridger Wineger, Look,

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Speaker 2: I hope you're feeling nice. What's going on? Nothing has

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Speaker 2: happened to me today. The only thing that happened to

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Speaker 2: me today was that I was reminded that there's apparently

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Speaker 2: a coin shortage. But I feel like that can't possibly

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Speaker 2: be true. I feel like there's a I see a

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Speaker 2: sign hanging at my local Starbucks. It says there's a

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Speaker 2: coin shortage. It's been there for months. If there's still

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Speaker 2: a coin shortage, I don't know what to tell anyone

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Speaker 2: at this point. If you have coins at home, I

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Speaker 2: suppose be careful with them, use them only when needed.

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Speaker 2: I don't have that many coins. I'm not out on

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Speaker 2: the lookout for coins. Look. I didn't want to start

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Speaker 2: this podcast out with an alarming warning like this, but

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Speaker 2: this is essentially the only thing that happened in my

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Speaker 2: life today, and Look, whoever's in charge of coins, we

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Speaker 2: need to get it together. Let's get more of them

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Speaker 2: or get rid of them. I can't keep thinking about coins.

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Speaker 2: I want to think about today's guest. I think she's

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Speaker 2: so funny. Everyone loves her. It's Martha Kelly, Martha. Welcome

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Speaker 2: to I said no gifts.

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Speaker 3: Hi, Richard, thank you for having me.

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Speaker 2: Look, I'm sorry that we got off I feel like

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Speaker 2: we're off to, you know, a shaky start here with

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Speaker 2: this warning about coins. Are you familiar with this coin shortage?

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Speaker 4: I have seen those signs, but.

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Speaker 3: I also was in my local Starbucks literally just ten

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Speaker 3: minutes ago. I took the chance of asking it if

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Speaker 3: they are able to sell bottles of sugar free cinnamadulce

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Speaker 3: syrup again because there's been a shortage.

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Speaker 4: What Yeah, So they said yes.

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Speaker 3: So I took that to mean that Starbucks is recovering

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Speaker 3: from the pandemic, and it's it's disheartening to hear that

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Speaker 3: they're still having a coin shortage.

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Speaker 2: So the US is out of coins and syrup.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's.

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Speaker 3: I have to say, like some of the people who

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Speaker 3: helped me get through the worst isolation of the pandemic,

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Speaker 3: or the people that worked at my local drive through Starbucks,

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Speaker 3: of course, just we got to know each other by

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Speaker 3: name and would ask each other how we were doing.

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Speaker 3: And I definitely feel like anybody who worked in customer

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Speaker 3: service during the pandemic should get like some kind of

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Speaker 3: giant federal grant or something, you.

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Speaker 2: Know, Oh absolutely, I mean people who just had to

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Speaker 2: work through the things straight without any breaks and now

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Speaker 2: probably getting screamed at more often than not. And also

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Speaker 2: the idea of working an entire shift, you know, as

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Speaker 2: someone who's worked in service jobs like this before, the

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Speaker 2: idea of working an eight hour shift with like maybe

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Speaker 2: a fifteen minute break and a half hour lunch and

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Speaker 2: then the rest of the time you have a mask on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah exhausting. I mean, I'm not saying anything new here,

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Speaker 2: but yeah, absolutely, let's give these people some sort of

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Speaker 2: reward that's not a ribbon.

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Speaker 3: I agree. And I'm sorry that I started my guest

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Speaker 3: spot on your podcast already on a campaign stump, given

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Speaker 3: a speech, kind of got carried away.

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Speaker 2: This is people will look back to this as your

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Speaker 2: early early steps into politics. Look at your guest on

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Speaker 2: I said, no gifts is kind of a toe in

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Speaker 2: the water. I imagine I hope that one.

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Speaker 3: Day people call me the new Caitlyn Jenner as far

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Speaker 3: as politics go.

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Speaker 2: So I'm working on Caitlyn share a lot of similar ideals.

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Speaker 2: I feel like we.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I shouldn't have brought that up.

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Speaker 2: Well, look, Caitlyn's a complicated person and she look, she

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Speaker 2: doesn't do a lot of things I agree with, but

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Speaker 2: so do a lot of people. And she's a tough

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Speaker 2: person her entire let's just be honest, the entire Genner

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Speaker 2: Kardashian clan is a difficult group to deal with.

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Speaker 4: I will agree with that.

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Speaker 3: I will wholeheartedly agree with that. I would also say,

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Speaker 3: like most people, there are certainly plenty of people I

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Speaker 3: am related to who I could also say are difficult

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Speaker 3: to deal with, and who would say that about me.

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Speaker 3: So I'm not I didn't want to. Like first I

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Speaker 3: started out shit talking the pandemic. Now I'm talking in celebrity.

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Speaker 3: I feel like I've started off really negative.

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Speaker 4: I apologize.

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Speaker 2: I do want to return to you buying bottles of

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Speaker 2: this syrup? Is that something people regularly do or is

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Speaker 2: this like something that you like hinted at to a

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Speaker 2: Starbucks cashier and they're like, look, you can just buy

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Speaker 2: the entire bottle.

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Speaker 3: Like I went around in different kind of disguises to

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Speaker 3: different Starbucks to see if I could. I honestly, now

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Speaker 3: that you say that, I can't remember when I found

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Speaker 3: out you could buy them at Starbucks, but it was

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Speaker 3: It's been at least a few years of First it

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Speaker 3: was I used to just get plain lattes and put

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Speaker 3: splenda in them, and then they came out with sugar

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Speaker 3: free cinnamon adult lattes. If you get it with whole milk,

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Speaker 3: it still tastes like a dessert. And then I was like,

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Speaker 3: it would be great to have that in my morning

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Speaker 3: coffee as well. And I can't remember how I found out,

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Speaker 3: but yeah, you can buy them. They're like thirteen Bucks,

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Speaker 3: and not every Starbucks will sell them. And also sometimes

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Speaker 3: as Starbucks, some people will sell it and other people

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Speaker 3: if you get there when someone else's working, they'll refuse

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Speaker 3: to sell it. And sometimes it depends on whether they

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Speaker 3: like your attitude or not. And right so I am,

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Speaker 3: of course I always whether or not I'm buying the stoup.

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Speaker 3: I approach Starbucks with the love that I feel for

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Speaker 3: everybody that works there. But I think if you seem

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Speaker 3: weak at all, some strong men Starbucks.

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Speaker 4: Burriss will say no.

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Speaker 3: I can't sell you that, even if you bought it

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Speaker 3: there the week before.

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Speaker 2: I mean, are you using cash to buy it? I

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Speaker 2: just feel like if it's in the system, they should

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Speaker 2: be able to sell it. Unless this money is going

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Speaker 2: directly into the Barisa's pocket and they're selling it under

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Speaker 2: the counter. How is that just feels like company policy?

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Speaker 3: Well, I can't the ones I'm thinking of, the truth is,

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Speaker 3: there's only ever been one store manager that just he

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Speaker 3: just didn't want to sell it because he thought they

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Speaker 3: might run out, and I guess he didn't want me

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Speaker 3: to start to expect it every He.

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Speaker 4: Was like a tough lo low parent or a step parent.

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Speaker 3: But usually it's people think, well, sometimes they legitimately don't

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Speaker 3: have enough in stock to sell it, and then sometimes

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Speaker 3: people just don't know they can.

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Speaker 4: Sell it and say no.

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Speaker 3: And I don't argue with them, because again, I've worked

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Speaker 3: in the service industry, and you shouldn't fight with the

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Speaker 3: people who can't tell you to fuck off if they're

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Speaker 3: if you're you know, sorry again, still going negative. I

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Speaker 3: keep trying to turn it around.

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Speaker 2: No, I think what you're doing is a good service

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Speaker 2: because you know, I've dealt with plenty of angry customers

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Speaker 2: before and when, especially when you work within the structure

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Speaker 2: of a giant corporation where the rules do not band,

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Speaker 2: the customer service representative does not have any power, so

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Speaker 2: you're just screaming at somebody who can't you know, can't

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Speaker 2: do anything for you.

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Speaker 3: Right.

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Speaker 2: And also I've dealt with customers at you know, mom

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Speaker 2: and pop type places, and in those places, I have

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Speaker 2: made my own little rules and that really infuriates me

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Speaker 2: when the customer is so belligerent that they're coming after

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Speaker 2: my own little rules. So just leave the customer service

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Speaker 2: representative alone. It's a thankless job, I agree.

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Speaker 3: And I will also say, like, if you ever have

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Speaker 3: to deal with someone in a job where you know

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Speaker 3: that normally people only call them when they're mad, if

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Speaker 3: you if you interact with someone in that job and

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Speaker 3: you're really really nice to them, the way that it

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Speaker 3: affects them will almost move you to tears, and it

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Speaker 3: will make you want to do that all the time,

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Speaker 3: because it's like, yeah, I mean, somebody has to work

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Speaker 3: at the I R. S or you know, at the

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Speaker 3: at the gas company or the phone company or whatever.

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Speaker 2: You know, do you have any memorable service jobs.

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Speaker 3: I have almost exclusively service jobs from my past and

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Speaker 3: not not too distant past. Domino's pizza drive delivery driver.

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Speaker 2: How long did you do that for?

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Speaker 3: I did it two different places, a couple of years apart,

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Speaker 3: but maybe a total of like close, I don't know,

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Speaker 3: maybe a year ish.

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Speaker 2: Was this in La or was this elsewhere?

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Speaker 3: One was in West Sila and one was in down

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Speaker 3: in torrent and in West l A that one I got.

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Speaker 3: I totaled my car and then two weeks later had

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Speaker 3: another car. I think my parents land me money to

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Speaker 3: buy a used car, and I two weeks after totaling

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Speaker 3: the other car first and back, got robbed at knife

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Speaker 3: point and I kept working there for months longer.

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Speaker 2: Yeah wait, so did you total your car while pizza

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Speaker 2: was in the car?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? I am, yeah, it was. The accident was one

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Speaker 3: hundred percent my fault and the lady who hit me.

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Speaker 3: It's like I was trying to make a U turn

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Speaker 3: from the curb and I looked one way, looked the

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Speaker 3: other way, didn't look back. That's what you're supposed to do,

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Speaker 3: is look back again before ding. I didn't. I just went,

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Speaker 3: you know, like that, and then this woman tea bummed me.

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Speaker 3: She was going really fast, but it was I pulled

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Speaker 3: out in front of her, and then it knocked my

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Speaker 3: hat to the side and my glasses and then she

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Speaker 3: threw my door open to yell at me. And as

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Speaker 3: soon as she saw me, she was like, oh, okay, Uh,

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Speaker 3: don't don't worry that the paramedics are coming. I couldn't

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Speaker 3: get out. My door was smashed. I wasn't seriously hurt

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Speaker 3: like I had some I had a big bump on

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Speaker 3: my head and had to go to the er. But

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Speaker 3: they just they gave me Vike again and said have

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Speaker 3: your have a friend or family member wake you up

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Speaker 3: every so often tonight to make sure you don't have

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Speaker 3: a concussion and die. And my two roommates were like, yeah, okay,

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Speaker 3: and then they just.

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Speaker 4: I just.

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Speaker 3: This is uh another really uplifting story from.

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Speaker 2: Well what became of the pizza.

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Speaker 3: It was like, yeah, I bet you it did.

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Speaker 4: Just stay in the car.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, they I mean I called either I called or

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Speaker 3: the police called my manager and said, you know, your

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Speaker 3: driver's been in an accident. And so then they just

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Speaker 3: sent someone else to finish that delivery. But to their credit,

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Speaker 3: I will say the Dominoes paid from my medical.

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Speaker 2: Wonderful, like a worker's comp sort of situation. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I started crying and saying I'm going to get fired,

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Speaker 3: and the paramedics, I'm sure to them was like, you

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Speaker 3: can find another minimum minimum wage job.

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Speaker 2: It's interesting to get in a wreck as a pizza

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Speaker 2: delivery person and then the ambulance comes, which is kind

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Speaker 2: of another delivery service. So there's just a lot of

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Speaker 2: delivery happening there, a lot of.

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Speaker 4: Lot of cars, yes, yes, And then you.

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Speaker 2: Got robbed at knife point while delivering pizza. Was that

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Speaker 2: like you stepped up to the door and the person

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Speaker 2: answered the door holding a knife.

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Speaker 4: No, it was an apartment complex.

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Speaker 3: It was just this happened a lot where I shouldn't

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Speaker 3: say a lot, but it happened periodically. Somebody. The thing is,

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Speaker 3: somebody calls in a fake order. When the Domino's person

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Speaker 3: gets there, they step out from behind a tree and

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Speaker 3: take whatever money you have on you. So that's kind

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Speaker 3: of how it went.

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Speaker 2: And that's terrifying.

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Speaker 3: It was, but the guy who did it was really

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Speaker 3: like quiet and calm, and he didn't like he don't

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Speaker 3: the only contact we had like he pulled the knife

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Speaker 3: out and showed me, and it was a big knife,

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Speaker 3: but I gave him all the cash I had. He

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Speaker 3: took the pizza and the six pack of coke, and

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Speaker 3: then he put his hand on my shoulder and like

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Speaker 3: sort of spun me to point back out towards the

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Speaker 3: street and said, go on back to your car. That's

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Speaker 3: I mean, he didn't he didn't do funnything violent.

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Speaker 2: I guess it was a gentleman.

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Speaker 4: He was a gentleman thief.

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Speaker 3: And yeah, and it wasn't my money even that he stole,

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Speaker 3: So I'm really lucky, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. And so how much longer did you work after

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Speaker 2: the knife point?

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Speaker 3: Sure, it was like six more months at least. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I was pretty jumpy for a while. I've been making deliveries,

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Speaker 3: but sometimes it was fun. It was like you just

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Speaker 3: you're in your car, listening to whatever radio you wanted

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Speaker 3: to and driving around without having to deal with like

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Speaker 3: your your customer interaction is really short, so it's it's

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Speaker 3: kind of fun.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it sounds kind of delightful to me. I've never

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Speaker 2: worked as a pizza delivery person, probably because I feel

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Speaker 2: like there was an unsolved mysteries when I was a

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Speaker 2: kid where a pizza delivery woman went to an address

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Speaker 2: and then vanished, which probably happened more often, I mean

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Speaker 2: more often than we'd like to think. So I never

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Speaker 2: applied for pizza delivery, but I did have a friend

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Speaker 2: who was a pizza delivery person as teens, and we

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Speaker 2: would ride in the back of his car and eat

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Speaker 2: pizza while he delivered pizza. It's a very it's like,

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Speaker 2: on some level, a very fun job. You get to

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Speaker 2: ask music, just go see the city and get paid

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Speaker 2: for it. On some level, yeah, it was fun. What

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Speaker 2: kind of music were you listening to?

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Speaker 3: The only thing that I remember was on Saturday nights,

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Speaker 3: I think it was one oh four point three in

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Speaker 3: La FM was they had a show called Disco Saturday

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Speaker 3: Night and it lasted. It lasted from like seven pm

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Speaker 3: to one am, something like that, and that's what I

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Speaker 3: listened to. It was so delightful. It was just seventies

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Speaker 3: and eighties disco all nights.

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Speaker 2: Fantastic and you have the lovely smell of pizza in

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Speaker 2: the car.

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Speaker 3: And when you worked at Domino's, you could have pizza

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Speaker 3: as your meal if you wanted, every shift, and I

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Speaker 3: never got sick of it.

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Speaker 2: I love pizza that's wonderful. I mean knife point robbery

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Speaker 2: aside and a horrifying car accident. I think that sounds

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Speaker 2: very nice.

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Speaker 4: I liked it.

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Speaker 2: Any super horrible experiences in other service jobs or.

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Speaker 3: Yes, but before I just had a quick idea, and

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Speaker 3: it's kind of your idea, so I'd be stealing it.

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Speaker 3: But I'm trying to think of a hit podcast because

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Speaker 3: I don't like acting and I'm not that good at it.

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Speaker 2: That's not you. I'm sure you probably don't like it,

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Speaker 2: but you are good at it. We're not going to

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Speaker 2: get into affirming Martha here.

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Speaker 3: Hart, but I would. I think it would be really

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Speaker 3: fun to have a hit. And so what you said

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Speaker 3: a minute ago, true crime is really popular. What about

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Speaker 3: a true crime podcast about it's only about pizza delivery

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Speaker 3: people that have gone missing while.

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Speaker 2: Working, Martha. If you make that podcast and I'm not

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Speaker 2: at least a guest co host on occasion, I will sue. Okay,

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Speaker 2: but I do want some level of credit on your

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Speaker 2: pizza true crime pod. That feels like a hit to me.

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Speaker 3: Okay, let's I will. I'll have my my dog and

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Speaker 3: my two cats are my legal team. I'll have them

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Speaker 3: drop a contract. But nightmare service jobs. Like my first

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Speaker 3: job was Kentucky Fried Chicken. People yelled at me all

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Speaker 3: the time as a sixteen year old. Yeah, I kept

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Speaker 3: a bottle of Vodko work and I don't regret it.

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Speaker 3: That's the only way to survive as a sixteen year

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Speaker 3: old at a fast food restaurant. As senior. I got job.

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Speaker 2: I wish I had known that.

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Speaker 3: And then I worked as a cashier at CVS Drugstore,

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Speaker 3: and then I started waitressing.

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Speaker 4: Then Dominoes.

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Speaker 3: I worked as a pet sitter, dog walker. I did

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Speaker 3: that a lot. I worked as an internet copywriter. That's

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Speaker 3: not a service industry did.

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Speaker 2: I worked as an internet copywriter.

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Speaker 3: I did the the early two thousand's SEO copywriting, which is.

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Speaker 2: Basically did the same thing.

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Speaker 3: It just was a lifesaver and also it was.

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Speaker 2: Terrible yes for the listener the SEO copywriting. I don't

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Speaker 2: know if Martha, if this was your experience, but you're

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Speaker 2: basically trying to find ways to describe a product with

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Speaker 2: keywords and using the keywords as much as possible, which

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Speaker 2: basically ends up looking like a maniac wrote it. Because

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Speaker 2: nobody repeats words that often like mattre or engagement ring

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Speaker 2: or whatever you're trying to sell. It's like an alien

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Speaker 2: wrote it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's one time. Sorry, mccun't. Barry has he's trying

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Speaker 3: to break into show business like Lucy One doesy on

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Speaker 3: men as we have a show. Yeah, my friend and

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Speaker 3: I were working on because it's also like you have

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Speaker 3: to do like fifty pages or one hundred pages sometimes

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Speaker 3: of the same keywords. And my friend and I were

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Speaker 3: doing one and it was for Dish Network tipe cable

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Speaker 3: in Hawaii, and it was I thought it was going

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Speaker 3: to get fired because we hadn't slept and we were

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Speaker 3: splitting the pages.

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Speaker 4: Was like, what is the dumbest thing you could say?

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Speaker 3: Like you think outside it's nice in Hawaii, Well wait

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Speaker 3: until you see the one hundred channels of Dish Network

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Speaker 3: on your TV, Like the stupidest garbage and we KNA

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Speaker 3: we're doing it. Thinka, this is my last job with

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Speaker 3: this And then nobody cared. Didn't get in trouble at all.

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Speaker 2: The only time I got in trouble with SEO was

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Speaker 2: I had to I had to write a description of

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Speaker 2: electric fireplaces, and I had like, really, I felt like

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Speaker 2: I had really pushed my descriptions to the max and

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Speaker 2: I wrote some I think the first sentence was there

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Speaker 2: are so many things you can do in front of

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Speaker 2: an electric fireplace. And that was the one thing I

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Speaker 2: got flagged on trying to just create a little eroticism

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Speaker 2: within the SEO copy which I think is totally fair.

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Speaker 2: But then, you know, it was nice to know there

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Speaker 2: was a boundary that I couldn't cross. And I don't know,

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Speaker 2: there's something nice about that type of copywriting where the

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Speaker 2: bar is as low as possible and you can truly

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Speaker 2: just write junk. There's something there is something fun to

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Speaker 2: the insanity of that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Look, I know that listeners are tuning in for SEO

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Speaker 2: copywriting talk. They want to hear as much as possible

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Speaker 2: about search engine optimization, But I do have something else

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Speaker 2: to talk to you about, Martha. And look, you and

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Speaker 2: I have known each other through the internet for a while.

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Speaker 2: Last year. You were actually one of the last my

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Speaker 2: last strong memories I can remember pre pandemic because we

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Speaker 2: were on corporate together. We were out at a hotel

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Speaker 2: and somewhere in the middle of the Los Angeles area.

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Speaker 2: But we've known each other. I feel like we have

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Speaker 2: a level of trust that few people do. You have

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Speaker 2: my email address, So you agreed to be on this podcast,

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Speaker 2: I said no gifts, and I was so excited. I

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Speaker 2: was get to catch up with Martha, find out a

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Speaker 2: little bit more about her as a person. Wonderful and

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Speaker 2: you know, maybe maybe I made a mistake. I guess

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Speaker 2: this is on me to give you my email address.

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Speaker 2: People need to be more selective about who they're giving

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Speaker 2: their email out to. And I've been a little willy

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Speaker 2: nilly about it because yesterday I get an email from

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Speaker 2: Martha Kelly and it says gift for podcast, and I

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Speaker 2: just immediately freaked out. Obviously, the podcast is a very

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Speaker 2: clear rule, which you are aware of. We're both respectful people,

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Speaker 2: or at least I thought we were. I just have

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Speaker 2: to say, Martha, what's going on? Did you give me

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Speaker 2: a gift?

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Speaker 3: I gave you a gift if it takes some of

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Speaker 3: the sting out of it, because I know it was

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Speaker 3: absolute defiant of your wishes and a violation of your will.

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Speaker 3: Part of why I gave it to you is because

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Speaker 3: I'm hoping I can also enjoy it because I have

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Speaker 3: a copy of the email and it's something I really

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Speaker 3: wanted to be able to look at. So okay, selfish

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Speaker 3: if that helps. It was for me more than you.

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Speaker 2: I can support somebody being selfish and not thinking of

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Speaker 2: I think that. Uh you know, I'm all about greed

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00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:09,080
Speaker 2: and just self interest, So that works for me. Look,

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Speaker 2: I will say I I wanted to preserve the surprise

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00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,600
Speaker 2: for myself. So what I did was I kind of

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00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:19,959
Speaker 2: looked off screen. I clicked on the email, clicked print,

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Speaker 2: almost essentially went cross eyed trying to do this. And

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Speaker 2: now it's kind of in this bag which says happy

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Speaker 2: wedding Forever. So do you think I should open the

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00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 2: gift here on the podcast?

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Speaker 3: I do. I'm a little it's going to be a

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00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,680
Speaker 3: little bit anti climactic because I think there was some

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00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 3: need to click on a leg.

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00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:51,000
Speaker 2: But well then, I mean, look, we're both on a computer.

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Speaker 2: We'll see what's happening within this bag. There may be

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Speaker 2: now kind of a cyber thriller element that's added once

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00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,440
Speaker 2: I get into the email, but I'll open open. What's

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00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:00,720
Speaker 2: the step of this?

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Speaker 3: I'm excited.

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00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:12,040
Speaker 2: Okay, let's see here. I've got two pieces of paper

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Speaker 2: and I'm gonna slowly look dot I like I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to be a good host. I don't look I want

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Speaker 2: to keep it a surprise. I still don't know. It

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00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 2: says gift for podcast student. I'm going down. Okay, So

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00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,520
Speaker 2: the first thing I'm seeing is a little like almost

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Speaker 2: a logo for the Dianne Fosse Gorilla Fund. Diane Fossey,

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Speaker 2: did she have something to do with gorillas in the mist?

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Speaker 3: Yes? It was. It was based on her. Yeah, so

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Speaker 3: Gourney Weaver.

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Speaker 2: Played her right, which I've never seen, which I'm feel

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Speaker 2: is the movie good?

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Speaker 3: It's good, but it'll make you.

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Speaker 2: Cry, don't Okay.

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Speaker 3: I wish I couldn't watch it, but it's great.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Well, let me continue down this. This is dear Martha,

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Speaker 2: thank you for adopting Oh my God, sir Orwanda sur

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00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 2: aur Wa n Da. Here at the Fosse Fund, we

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00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:10,119
Speaker 2: are inspired daily by the generosity and support of friends

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00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:14,440
Speaker 2: like you. Your symbolic adoption will ensure that the Fosse

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00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:18,159
Speaker 2: Fund is able to continue its work protecting gorillas and

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00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:23,000
Speaker 2: the forests they call home. This holistic conservation work ensures

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Speaker 2: that gorillas will be part of our world for generations

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00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:29,080
Speaker 2: to come. Below you will find links to download. Okay,

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Speaker 2: so this is the part where the printing no longer helps.

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Speaker 2: This is sorry, we're going to have to I feel

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Speaker 2: like we need to get into the clicking.

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Speaker 3: I can tell you what you get for that symbolic

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00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 3: adoption if you want, but you can also click on

439
00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:44,360
Speaker 3: it if you want.

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00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 2: To go to the e tell us first, and then

441
00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:47,920
Speaker 2: I'm going to click so you.

442
00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:52,960
Speaker 3: Get a video of that gorilla and some color photos

443
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:57,040
Speaker 3: that you are while you're cordially invited to print them

444
00:26:57,080 --> 00:26:58,760
Speaker 3: out on your own color computer.

445
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:03,399
Speaker 2: You think, I've gotten enough color ink to print a

446
00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:06,440
Speaker 2: color picture. This is going to be like a half color.

447
00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:09,880
Speaker 2: Then turns into kind of a blurry red and.

448
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:13,960
Speaker 3: There's like a newsletter about the little guy.

449
00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:18,399
Speaker 2: I think, oh yeah, okay, I'm opening my Gmail now.

450
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,320
Speaker 2: Yes I'm on Gmail. Me too.

451
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,800
Speaker 3: So I didn't click on any of the links because

452
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 3: just in case, they have it set up to where

453
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,800
Speaker 3: you can only click on it once and that and

454
00:27:30,840 --> 00:27:32,679
Speaker 3: then maybe not.

455
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 4: Maybe you can more.

456
00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:36,880
Speaker 3: Than once, but if only once, I wanted you to get.

457
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:40,800
Speaker 2: To Okay, I'm going to click the gorilla bio first.

458
00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:45,240
Speaker 2: I'm going to actually download the certificate first. Let's see here.

459
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 2: You know, opening my email mid podcast is a very

460
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:49,880
Speaker 2: risky move. You never know if you're going to get

461
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:54,560
Speaker 2: an alarming email. Oh this gorilla is How old is

462
00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:56,400
Speaker 2: this thing? It's like a baby.

463
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,679
Speaker 3: I think he was here or she was a baby

464
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,919
Speaker 3: when they at least when they took these pictures.

465
00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 4: He might still be.

466
00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:10,960
Speaker 2: This is the sweetest little creature I've ever seen. This

467
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:15,119
Speaker 2: is a yeah, so listener, you'll see this on Instagram eventually.

468
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:19,800
Speaker 2: But it's a you know, a beautiful picture of uh Sarahwanda.

469
00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 2: And you know Martha's name is you know, Unfortunately it's

470
00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:26,840
Speaker 2: not my name. I'm not getting any of the credit

471
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:31,080
Speaker 2: here for adopting the gorilla. So this is technically Martha

472
00:28:31,119 --> 00:28:33,679
Speaker 2: has sent me a gift. The gift you's sent me

473
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:35,960
Speaker 2: is look who what I'm I'm doing in my life.

474
00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 2: I'm adopting gorillas. Now I'm going to click the video

475
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 2: and see what's Oh boy, Okay, now this is where

476
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,880
Speaker 2: we run into some trouble. Martha. The video cannot be found,

477
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:54,200
Speaker 2: Diane Fosse, the fund has robbed you.

478
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,000
Speaker 3: Okay, I'll look into it.

479
00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:01,080
Speaker 2: There is a fortunately, there is a wonderful video of

480
00:29:01,120 --> 00:29:04,800
Speaker 2: a gorilla family kind of playing in the back the background,

481
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 2: maybe as a consolation prize, But that video has now ended.

482
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 2: I'm now going to photo. We're going to photo. We're

483
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 2: gonna see. Okay, Martha, the photo also cannot be found.

484
00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:22,000
Speaker 3: You know, I'll have to see on myke God damn it.

485
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:30,200
Speaker 3: Turning into a gonna go full Karen and get real.

486
00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,760
Speaker 3: That's what they call it when ladies my age get mad.

487
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:38,720
Speaker 2: People. This is I mean, this may be a tactic

488
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:42,680
Speaker 2: of the Diane Fosse Gorilla Fund, which I wouldn't blame

489
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 2: them for, to continue to raise more funds. Maybe it's

490
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 2: sort of a you know you. They take their money

491
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,840
Speaker 2: and then ask for more money to access the videos

492
00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:55,280
Speaker 2: and photos that we were all hoping to see. Meanwhile,

493
00:29:55,360 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 2: this gorilla that you've adopted has essentially been I don't

494
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:03,960
Speaker 2: even know what to say, is being held hostage.

495
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 3: Okay, I'll contact them. God fucking damn it.

496
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:17,280
Speaker 2: Another another bump in the road for Martha Kelly.

497
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:20,520
Speaker 3: I just feel like this might be part of why

498
00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:25,000
Speaker 3: mountain gorillas are endangered is because the people in charge

499
00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 3: of their administrative stuff are not on the ball like

500
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,320
Speaker 3: maybe they could. Maybe the gorillas could put all their

501
00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 3: adoption fees together and hire a good admin, perhaps.

502
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 2: Some decent people on the team. I get some social

503
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:48,280
Speaker 2: media people. That's fine. Look that what's good here is

504
00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 2: that at least we know the money has gone to gorillas.

505
00:30:51,520 --> 00:30:56,320
Speaker 3: Yeah. Sorry, I'll figure out why the video, the video

506
00:30:56,480 --> 00:31:00,400
Speaker 3: and the picture not available because when you buy, when

507
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:04,479
Speaker 3: you do the adoption, you click a box saying if

508
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 3: you're gonna give that as a gift to somebody, and

509
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,400
Speaker 3: I clicked it is this? Now?

510
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:13,160
Speaker 2: Is this the first time you've donated to the Diane

511
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:14,120
Speaker 2: Fosse Gorilla Fund?

512
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:15,160
Speaker 3: No?

513
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 2: Okay, how did you find out about it? Well?

514
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:24,760
Speaker 3: I think the third season of Baskets for a rap gift.

515
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:31,280
Speaker 3: This great person named Kate who did my makeup for

516
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:33,520
Speaker 3: she really loves animals.

517
00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:35,280
Speaker 4: It really really loves animals.

518
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 3: So I adopted a couple baby gorillas as a rap

519
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 3: gift for her. Oh I did that that year. I

520
00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:47,520
Speaker 3: was a little spun out for reasons that had nothing

521
00:31:47,560 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 3: to do with the show. But season four I redeemed

522
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 3: myself with all of my weird season three rap gifts

523
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:59,160
Speaker 3: by getting all the hair and makeup and costume ladies,

524
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:06,880
Speaker 3: a lot of edibles and different types at a legal

525
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,560
Speaker 3: weed shop, which is the only time I've ever been

526
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 3: to that kind of place. And it was great.

527
00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:15,760
Speaker 2: I think those are both. Both of those gifts, whether

528
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:19,040
Speaker 2: it's the donation or it's the edibles, are both good gifts.

529
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:23,440
Speaker 3: Well, Kate, Kate loved the gorillas, but I think that

530
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:28,440
Speaker 3: I think after giving something like that later, I was

531
00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:32,160
Speaker 3: just like, I felt like I should give people something

532
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:36,160
Speaker 3: they could actually physically have in their hands and just

533
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:39,479
Speaker 3: get high from.

534
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:43,920
Speaker 2: I think the I think donations are a good gift

535
00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 2: often for adults, because so frequently adults have everything they

536
00:32:48,680 --> 00:32:52,479
Speaker 2: need and want, and so there are things you know

537
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 2: that they care about or whatever it is. It is

538
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,920
Speaker 2: a hard gift to give or to receive sometimes where

539
00:32:58,080 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 2: you're just like, Okay, this doesn't exist for either of us.

540
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:06,680
Speaker 2: Money has just gone into the webmaster of Dianne Fossey

541
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:12,040
Speaker 2: Gorilla Funds pocket. But you can both feel good about it.

542
00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 2: Nobody feels bad, unless, of course, the money is you know,

543
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:19,560
Speaker 2: I donated, who knows. I'm not going to try to

544
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:22,240
Speaker 2: say some fund. I'll probably say something that somebody loves.

545
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 2: And what are we talking about.

546
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:30,200
Speaker 3: But about people get mad about that.

547
00:33:31,920 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 2: Some fossy freaks are going to come out of the

548
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:38,240
Speaker 2: woodwork and they're going to dance over to the reviews

549
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 2: page and just review bomb me. Don't do that, give

550
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:46,680
Speaker 2: me five stars. Give you know. I don't want to

551
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:50,040
Speaker 2: give anybody any ideas. Martha, you're a lover of animals,

552
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 2: you love an animal, you have three. You've got a

553
00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,200
Speaker 2: beautiful dog and two cats.

554
00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 3: Thank you?

555
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:59,200
Speaker 2: Have you been a lifelong animal lover? Yes, it's your

556
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:02,120
Speaker 2: family and animal family we were.

557
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 3: I would say my parents were a let your kids

558
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:14,200
Speaker 3: have pets, but they weren't as good with pets as

559
00:34:14,360 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 3: I wish they had been. Like like our two dogs

560
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 3: kind of lived out in the yard. They were sometimes

561
00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 3: allowed inside. But ugh, oh oh, I shouldn't. I shouldn't

562
00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:35,680
Speaker 3: have gone down that memory. But in their defense, like

563
00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 3: my my mom grew up out in the country in

564
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:44,720
Speaker 3: East Texas where dogs never came inside, and my dad

565
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:49,399
Speaker 3: grew up in the depression with eight brothers and sisters

566
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:51,760
Speaker 3: and there was barely enough food for people.

567
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:53,480
Speaker 4: So I don't think they had any pets.

568
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 3: So they didn't really they didn't have great caretaking instincts.

569
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:02,359
Speaker 3: But but they let us have pets. And it's not

570
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 3: we didn't. We didn't like abuse some or anything. We

571
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:10,240
Speaker 3: just probably they needed a lot more attention and affection

572
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 3: than they got.

573
00:35:11,280 --> 00:35:15,680
Speaker 2: You know, I do think that pet care in the

574
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:19,040
Speaker 2: last like two decades or so has really advanced for

575
00:35:19,239 --> 00:35:22,319
Speaker 2: most people. I remember growing up, we had pets that

576
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:28,680
Speaker 2: certainly could have used more attention and love, but it

577
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:30,440
Speaker 2: just I think it was kind of normal to just

578
00:35:30,760 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 2: have a pet that you kind of took care of

579
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:34,920
Speaker 2: or something, which is just so unfortunate.

580
00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:38,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, but when we started getting cats, they sort of

581
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 3: ended up getting all of the attention and the affection

582
00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:48,160
Speaker 3: because cats demand Cats demand it in a way dogs can't,

583
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:48,839
Speaker 3: you know.

584
00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:53,680
Speaker 2: Right, Well, yeah, that's the interesting interesting thing about cats

585
00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 2: is there in a lot of ways very easy to

586
00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:58,320
Speaker 2: take care of and are almost like little you know,

587
00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:00,719
Speaker 2: they just do their own thing and you fill up

588
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,200
Speaker 2: their food bowl. And dogs, my dog is you know,

589
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:07,320
Speaker 2: following me around the house and non stop asking for treats,

590
00:36:07,640 --> 00:36:12,080
Speaker 2: trying to sleep in the bed. Where am I going

591
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:12,399
Speaker 2: with this?

592
00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:14,799
Speaker 3: Can I ask the follow up question when you say

593
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 3: trying to sleep in the bud? What why is it

594
00:36:18,680 --> 00:36:20,640
Speaker 3: he's succeeding in sleeping in the middle.

595
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:26,080
Speaker 2: She's no longer allowed because she's too big and she

596
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:27,799
Speaker 2: doesn't know what to do with herself in the night,

597
00:36:27,840 --> 00:36:30,360
Speaker 2: and so she with my boyfriend and ies. She's like

598
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 2: constantly shifting around when he's out of town. She sleeps

599
00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:37,600
Speaker 2: in the bed because she can take up half of

600
00:36:37,640 --> 00:36:41,480
Speaker 2: the thing, and it makes perfect sense, but she's just

601
00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:43,640
Speaker 2: a bit of a nuisance. She's like eighty five pounds

602
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 2: and so she's she's doing a lot of circling in

603
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,799
Speaker 2: the bed. She's there was a point when I was

604
00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:53,879
Speaker 2: like heading back problems because she puts her entire weight

605
00:36:53,960 --> 00:36:56,920
Speaker 2: on you and you wake up and you're like, well,

606
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:58,960
Speaker 2: this is not a normal way for a person to sleep.

607
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,239
Speaker 2: Bless her heart, I would love to be able to

608
00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 2: sleep with her all the time, but it's uh, she's

609
00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:07,080
Speaker 2: just too big of a too big of a gal

610
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 2: and doesn't know how to do it. What kind of

611
00:37:10,080 --> 00:37:13,719
Speaker 2: dog is she? She's an American bulldog. We didn't know

612
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:19,719
Speaker 2: what she was. Then my boyfriend Jim, for Christmas one year,

613
00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,520
Speaker 2: wanted the DNA thing, so I got the DNA thing.

614
00:37:24,360 --> 00:37:27,399
Speaker 2: We found out she's a completely American bulldog. We had thought,

615
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:32,040
Speaker 2: you know, boxer or pitbull or something, but I don't know.

616
00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:35,120
Speaker 2: I can highly recommend an American bulldog. She's a fantastic,

617
00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:39,680
Speaker 2: I mean, favorite dog I've ever experienced, just a wonderful, quiet,

618
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:42,879
Speaker 2: respectful person. What kind of dog is your dog?

619
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 3: She's I think she's some kind of Collie and a

620
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:52,680
Speaker 3: German Shepherd. And maybe I should do the DNA thing, and.

621
00:37:52,760 --> 00:37:54,760
Speaker 2: Fine, she should. It's very fun.

622
00:37:55,080 --> 00:37:56,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, I should do that.

623
00:37:57,040 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure she has some German Shepherd. The first

624
00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:02,760
Speaker 3: dog of my own that I had as an adult

625
00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:07,400
Speaker 3: was a seventy five pound also a colle mix.

626
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:09,760
Speaker 4: And he slapped in my bed.

627
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:13,200
Speaker 3: There were no rules. He'd just said whatever he wanted,

628
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:16,280
Speaker 3: and I would wake up in the morning. Sometimes I'd

629
00:38:16,320 --> 00:38:19,959
Speaker 3: open my eyes and his face would be it would

630
00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 3: be also on my pillow, facing me with his eyes closed,

631
00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:26,799
Speaker 3: and it's kind of you know.

632
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:31,600
Speaker 2: Of course, it's extremely cute, funny the times when I

633
00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:35,440
Speaker 2: am able to fall asleep with Edie, that dog, it's

634
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:38,120
Speaker 2: the best thing. When she's in my arms and we're spooning,

635
00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:40,880
Speaker 2: it's a wonderful feeling. I wish she could just she

636
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:43,160
Speaker 2: had I wish she had a normal human sleep schedule,

637
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:46,279
Speaker 2: and then it would probably be fine. But we do

638
00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 2: what we can do. I mean, she does wake us

639
00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:50,520
Speaker 2: up every morning at seven o'clock trying to open the

640
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:54,879
Speaker 2: door and she's It's like our bedroom is a sliding door,

641
00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:56,640
Speaker 2: so she's able to just kind of push her head

642
00:38:56,680 --> 00:38:59,040
Speaker 2: up against it and slide it open and come in. So

643
00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:03,120
Speaker 2: but she's pretty respect I think she's learned. She's figured

644
00:39:03,160 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 2: out that when two people are in the bed, there's

645
00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:07,520
Speaker 2: not enough room for a dog. But I have nothing

646
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:10,759
Speaker 2: against sleeping with a dog. Some people are not into it.

647
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:12,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know.

648
00:39:12,320 --> 00:39:14,520
Speaker 4: I mean, I know some people think if.

649
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:17,840
Speaker 3: Your dog is alpha, you shouldn't let them because you

650
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:21,520
Speaker 3: have to show them that you're alpha. But I can't.

651
00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:24,440
Speaker 3: There's no chance I'm going to convince any dog that

652
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:29,600
Speaker 3: I'm alpha, so I didn't even try.

653
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:32,080
Speaker 2: How long have you had your dog, Well.

654
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:37,360
Speaker 3: I've had Rosie for nine years almost or about nine years,

655
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:40,759
Speaker 3: and she actually doesn't really sleep with me. Like she'll

656
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 3: get on the bed, she'll stay for a couple minutes,

657
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:47,120
Speaker 3: and then she'll go be more comfortable somewhere where she

658
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:48,279
Speaker 3: can kind of spread out.

659
00:39:48,680 --> 00:39:51,160
Speaker 2: Agains Oh right, right, she kind of puts you to bed.

660
00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:57,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's very sweet and just a great pub And now.

661
00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:01,440
Speaker 2: Back to the gift. Gorillas. Are you like a gorilla person?

662
00:40:01,760 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 2: Do you really love gorillas or is it just you're

663
00:40:03,760 --> 00:40:06,920
Speaker 2: looking for endangered animals to donate to the funds.

664
00:40:07,160 --> 00:40:11,759
Speaker 3: I really love gorillas. I said, you shouldn't watch gorillas

665
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:16,560
Speaker 3: in the mess, but it's actually it's because.

666
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:17,800
Speaker 4: There's sad stuff that happens.

667
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:22,839
Speaker 3: But yeah, if I wasn't afraid of the kinds of

668
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:27,880
Speaker 3: insects that live in jungles, I would want to.

669
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:29,319
Speaker 4: Do what Diane Fosse did.

670
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:31,719
Speaker 3: And like, I don't know that I'm smart enough to

671
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:35,440
Speaker 3: become a biologist. I think she was a science major

672
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 3: in college, but just she like to live with gorillas

673
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:47,160
Speaker 3: where they're in families. They're pretty gentle unless you're threatening them,

674
00:40:47,880 --> 00:40:53,960
Speaker 3: and they're super smart and there and they're so cute

675
00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:58,919
Speaker 3: and their faces are like pretty close to people faces. Yeah,

676
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,840
Speaker 3: I would. I have a friend who went to He

677
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:05,960
Speaker 3: went on like an elder I forget what they're called,

678
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 3: but it's like a group of retired people. You can

679
00:41:09,239 --> 00:41:11,640
Speaker 3: sign up and go on a tourist trip and they

680
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:16,320
Speaker 3: plan everything for you, kind of like elder hostile tourists stuff.

681
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:18,280
Speaker 2: Okay, I don't know.

682
00:41:18,120 --> 00:41:23,319
Speaker 3: But my parents did stuff like that in their sixties,

683
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 3: and like they went and they stayed in the mountains

684
00:41:27,920 --> 00:41:31,160
Speaker 3: where there are mountain gorillas, and he showed me pictures

685
00:41:31,160 --> 00:41:35,840
Speaker 3: on his phone and it made me cry. They're so beautiful,

686
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:37,919
Speaker 3: but there's you see them.

687
00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:39,319
Speaker 2: Well.

688
00:41:39,680 --> 00:41:45,160
Speaker 3: Well, for one thing, scared of flying any place that far.

689
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,800
Speaker 3: I've never been off the continent.

690
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:48,840
Speaker 2: Are you afraid of flying in general?

691
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:52,839
Speaker 3: Uh? Yeah? I had gotten a lot better. And then

692
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:57,040
Speaker 3: the last time I flew was like days before quarantine started.

693
00:41:57,080 --> 00:42:00,440
Speaker 3: It was like the beginning of March, and we had

694
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:04,240
Speaker 3: really bad turbulence and we were never in any danger.

695
00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 3: But for days I thought of my flight as a

696
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:09,520
Speaker 3: near death experience.

697
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:12,520
Speaker 4: That's how scared I wasn't find a few.

698
00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 3: Days later, I was like, that wasn't a near death experience.

699
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 3: We were nowhere, We weren't in any danger at any point.

700
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:24,560
Speaker 3: It was just really bumpy. But yeah, I'm scared of it.

701
00:42:24,640 --> 00:42:27,319
Speaker 3: And that. The other thing is like the spiders and

702
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:32,960
Speaker 3: the in any forest or jungle, any place with a

703
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:35,440
Speaker 3: lot of rain and vegetation, you're going to have a

704
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:40,000
Speaker 3: lot of bugs that bite right, and I can't handle.

705
00:42:39,719 --> 00:42:43,080
Speaker 2: That, Martha. They're but they're out taking seniors on these tours.

706
00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:45,759
Speaker 2: They're perfectly safe. We've got to get you off this

707
00:42:45,880 --> 00:42:50,080
Speaker 2: continent at some point. Come on, I'll take you.

708
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:56,040
Speaker 3: I'm also guessing if you go to a nature reserve

709
00:42:56,280 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 3: like that in Africa, or in any place where it's

710
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:03,799
Speaker 3: a lot of undeveloped land, you're going to have to

711
00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:07,600
Speaker 3: fly someplace to a small airport, which means a small,

712
00:43:08,400 --> 00:43:12,080
Speaker 3: small plane, which feels turbulence a lot more.

713
00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:17,480
Speaker 2: Right. Yeah, that is the point where I start slowing

714
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 2: down in my thinking about going to these places, because

715
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:24,040
Speaker 2: just the discomfort of being on a small plane is

716
00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:26,520
Speaker 2: you know, you're already you've probably been on a fifteen

717
00:43:26,520 --> 00:43:28,920
Speaker 2: hour flight to get to the big city, and then

718
00:43:28,920 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 2: you have to go to some small airport and then

719
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:34,680
Speaker 2: you're back on a plane that's even less comfortable. It

720
00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 2: starts to become a little much for me. That said,

721
00:43:38,719 --> 00:43:41,120
Speaker 2: I am still going to encourage you to do it.

722
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:44,400
Speaker 2: I've got to get you. We've got to get you

723
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:45,800
Speaker 2: to another country or something.

724
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:49,480
Speaker 3: We've got to get you out of this country. We

725
00:43:49,560 --> 00:43:52,279
Speaker 3: will go to any links to get you out of

726
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:53,040
Speaker 3: this country.

727
00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:57,000
Speaker 2: We have to remove Martha Kelly from the United States.

728
00:43:57,200 --> 00:44:01,080
Speaker 2: If it's the last thing we do, get her out

729
00:44:01,360 --> 00:44:03,840
Speaker 2: and don't let her back in. I'm going to just

730
00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:05,600
Speaker 2: keep I'm going to check in with you every once

731
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:10,000
Speaker 2: in a while and gently nudge, Look, why not if

732
00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 2: the plane goes down, it goes down.

733
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:18,000
Speaker 3: If my hit True Crime Pizza Delivery podcast takes hour,

734
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:26,200
Speaker 3: if our true Crime Pizza Delivery podcasts takes off and

735
00:44:27,360 --> 00:44:31,520
Speaker 3: we rake in the dollar dollar bills from it, then

736
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:35,040
Speaker 3: I will save up and go to see the Mountain Gorillas.

737
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:37,680
Speaker 2: Okay, I can't wait for this podcast to be played

738
00:44:37,719 --> 00:44:42,839
Speaker 2: in court when I'm suing you over your podcasts, just

739
00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:46,960
Speaker 2: trying to come after MI. What's rightfully mine? Martha? I

740
00:44:47,040 --> 00:44:51,800
Speaker 2: think we should play a game. Do you want to

741
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 2: play a game? Actually? I think we should play this

742
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:56,440
Speaker 2: game called Gift to a Curse. I'm trying to you know,

743
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:59,239
Speaker 2: we have two games, and when we play too much

744
00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 2: of one game, people freak out and then it's just

745
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:04,279
Speaker 2: back and forth and back and forth. And so let's

746
00:45:04,280 --> 00:45:07,440
Speaker 2: play this game called Gift No, Gift Master is not

747
00:45:07,520 --> 00:45:09,000
Speaker 2: the game we're going to be playing, but I'll say

748
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:11,560
Speaker 2: go play, go buy the home version of Gift Master.

749
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:13,439
Speaker 2: I'm plugging it. Right now. We're playing a game called

750
00:45:13,480 --> 00:45:15,960
Speaker 2: Gift or a Curse. That's what the game we're going

751
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:17,879
Speaker 2: to play. Right now, I'll tell you how we play

752
00:45:17,960 --> 00:45:20,160
Speaker 2: in a minute. I need a number between one and

753
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:24,919
Speaker 2: ten four. Okay, I have to do some light calculating.

754
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:28,320
Speaker 2: So while I'm doing this, while I'm determining the game pieces,

755
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:31,719
Speaker 2: you can promote something, you can recommend something, you can

756
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:36,120
Speaker 2: share a fact. Don't try to stir the pot. I

757
00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:39,719
Speaker 2: know you love to stir the pot. I'll be right back.

758
00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:49,240
Speaker 3: Okay, what fact would I like to I am drawing

759
00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:53,000
Speaker 3: a blank. I really this does not bode well for

760
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:57,680
Speaker 3: me having my own podcast that I cannot fill a

761
00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:01,320
Speaker 3: moment of airtime, I'm by myself.

762
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 4: I guess one thing I just would like.

763
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:09,359
Speaker 3: To say now that Disneyland is opening back up, I've

764
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:12,680
Speaker 3: long suspected that when you're in line for the Haunted

765
00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:16,919
Speaker 3: Mansion and one of the doors on the porch, when

766
00:46:16,960 --> 00:46:19,839
Speaker 3: you're in line, someone's on the other side of it

767
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 3: rattling the door knob. I feel like there's a tiny

768
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:28,040
Speaker 3: chance at least that someone really is trapped in there,

769
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:30,800
Speaker 3: and everyone ignores it because I think it's part of

770
00:46:30,840 --> 00:46:37,480
Speaker 3: the ride. But if you were trapped in there, how

771
00:46:37,520 --> 00:46:41,240
Speaker 3: would you know? So, Wow, I'm glad you're back because

772
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:43,600
Speaker 3: I was appreciating.

773
00:46:45,320 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 2: I think that was a very interesting use of the time,

774
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:50,480
Speaker 2: and I felt like you brought up an important issue.

775
00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:53,520
Speaker 2: I have heard something about someone being trapped in the

776
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:57,440
Speaker 2: Haunted Mansion. Yeah, I wonder if has anyone ever died

777
00:46:57,480 --> 00:46:58,440
Speaker 2: at the Haunted Mansion.

778
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:01,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know, but I don't know the story.

779
00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:06,719
Speaker 3: I just recently saw some you know, like, uh, when

780
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:11,279
Speaker 3: you open your web browsers, some news item down far

781
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:14,520
Speaker 3: down on the page of like, you know, the the

782
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:19,359
Speaker 3: case of the murder at the Haunted Matches something murder. Yeah,

783
00:47:19,480 --> 00:47:24,200
Speaker 3: like maybe or I could be wrong about the murder part,

784
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:27,879
Speaker 3: but I'm pretty sure somebody died there. And I don't

785
00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:28,480
Speaker 3: know how.

786
00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:30,399
Speaker 4: You could accidentally get hurt on that.

787
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 2: And it's such a mild ride, Yeah, it's it's like

788
00:47:34,400 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 2: dying in a costco or something.

789
00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean you could. You can get off the

790
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:43,320
Speaker 3: ride and walk around and never.

791
00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:46,600
Speaker 2: Get often tempted to. I would love to walk around

792
00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:50,880
Speaker 2: that old graveyard and through the dining room and this

793
00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:52,759
Speaker 2: sort of thing, dance.

794
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:55,440
Speaker 3: With the with the ghosts down at the Katillion.

795
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:56,600
Speaker 4: That seems like it.

796
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 3: Could be fun.

797
00:47:57,800 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 2: I would love to. I'm now getting a message from

798
00:48:00,480 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 2: our producer on a lease. She's saying, I don't think

799
00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:05,799
Speaker 2: anyone has died, but it seems as though someone got

800
00:48:05,800 --> 00:48:08,120
Speaker 2: injured critically jumping from car to car.

801
00:48:08,680 --> 00:48:11,920
Speaker 3: Oh well, okay, turns out we.

802
00:48:11,680 --> 00:48:15,400
Speaker 2: Were wrong on all kinds of account.

803
00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 3: And actually giving some dangerous advice about how easy it

804
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:20,920
Speaker 3: would be to not get hurt on that.

805
00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:26,840
Speaker 2: Right if you get If you die on the Haunted

806
00:48:26,880 --> 00:48:28,560
Speaker 2: Mansion ride, I feel like you kind of have it

807
00:48:28,640 --> 00:48:31,320
Speaker 2: coming or you've really gone out of your way to die.

808
00:48:32,440 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 3: Yeah.

809
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:37,040
Speaker 2: So yeah, look, let's play this game. This is called

810
00:48:37,080 --> 00:48:39,240
Speaker 2: gift or a curse. I'm going to name three things.

811
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 2: You're going to tell me if there're a gift or

812
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:45,120
Speaker 2: a curse, and why there are correct answers there are.

813
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:48,239
Speaker 2: You know, you can get all three wrong, you can

814
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:50,680
Speaker 2: get all three right, you can be somewhere in between.

815
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:53,200
Speaker 2: But you've got to be careful. You've got to be smart.

816
00:48:54,600 --> 00:49:00,960
Speaker 2: Let's get you a shot. Okay, okay, First gift or

817
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:04,240
Speaker 2: a curse? Cold American cheese.

818
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:11,000
Speaker 3: Ooh to me, cold American cheese is a gift because

819
00:49:12,440 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 3: melted American cheese is delicious on a hamburger, and in

820
00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:20,240
Speaker 3: order to have that, you've got to receive the American

821
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:23,360
Speaker 3: cheese when it's cold and fresh. And keep it cold

822
00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:25,680
Speaker 3: until you cook with it. So it's a gift.

823
00:49:26,480 --> 00:49:31,920
Speaker 2: Martha, You're off to a great start. I absolutely agree

824
00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:34,960
Speaker 2: with you on those exact points, because while I do

825
00:49:35,040 --> 00:49:38,799
Speaker 2: think cold American cheese is disgusting, I would rather eat

826
00:49:38,960 --> 00:49:44,840
Speaker 2: raw poultry a a melted American cheese. I'm no cheese snob.

827
00:49:44,920 --> 00:49:47,920
Speaker 2: I love a slice of melted American cheese on you know,

828
00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:51,080
Speaker 2: your hamburger, your breakfast sandwich, this kind of thing. And

829
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:55,360
Speaker 2: we do need to keep it cold otherwise. I imagine does

830
00:49:55,440 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 2: American cheese go bad. It's hard to say. I imagine

831
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:02,800
Speaker 2: it does. Yeah, and so you have it. Absolutely is

832
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 2: a gift, as a you know, as a means to

833
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:09,560
Speaker 2: an end, a means to a melted American cheese. Do

834
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:13,200
Speaker 2: not serve me a cold American cheese slice in any context.

835
00:50:13,200 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 2: I won't eat it. It will be nauseating. I'll be revolted.

836
00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:22,239
Speaker 2: But it does need to be served cold. It's a gift, right,

837
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:24,560
Speaker 2: all right, we're moving on. You've got one out of

838
00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 2: one so far. I love this for you. Now. Number

839
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:32,880
Speaker 2: two this is a listeners suggestion. Unfortunately, I guess the

840
00:50:32,920 --> 00:50:35,120
Speaker 2: person did not give their name or I as a

841
00:50:35,120 --> 00:50:38,160
Speaker 2: host failed to write their name down. It says unknown listener.

842
00:50:38,480 --> 00:50:44,000
Speaker 2: But they've suggested gift or a curse. Beard braids, beard braid.

843
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:48,040
Speaker 2: So I assume, you know, like a beard that's been braided,

844
00:50:48,080 --> 00:50:51,839
Speaker 2: it's gotten to the length that needs to be braided, and.

845
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:53,440
Speaker 4: It's all in one braid.

846
00:50:53,560 --> 00:50:56,719
Speaker 3: It's not like there's a couple braids and the rest

847
00:50:56,800 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 3: of it's free flowing.

848
00:50:58,120 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 4: It's just one break, big braid.

849
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:04,560
Speaker 2: It sounds like it's whatever you think it is. It

850
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:08,239
Speaker 2: could be multiple braids, whatever you want.

851
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:14,520
Speaker 3: I'm gonna say that a beard that has been braided

852
00:51:16,080 --> 00:51:23,520
Speaker 3: is more manageable, and probably if you drop food on it,

853
00:51:23,600 --> 00:51:28,480
Speaker 3: which for some reason people with beards always do. The

854
00:51:28,640 --> 00:51:31,279
Speaker 3: kinds of people that grow beards are also the kind

855
00:51:31,320 --> 00:51:35,040
Speaker 3: of people that drop food into their beard. So if

856
00:51:35,080 --> 00:51:37,919
Speaker 3: it's in a braid, it's easy to brush it off

857
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 3: or rinse it off. It doesn't get all in there like.

858
00:51:41,480 --> 00:51:42,400
Speaker 4: It would if it was.

859
00:51:42,880 --> 00:51:45,520
Speaker 3: You know, it's a surface that's easier to clean. So

860
00:51:46,640 --> 00:51:48,640
Speaker 3: I would say it's a gift.

861
00:51:49,800 --> 00:51:52,400
Speaker 2: Martha. I hate to hear this from you. Oh, No,

862
00:51:52,920 --> 00:51:55,719
Speaker 2: beard braids are gross? What are we talking about? What

863
00:51:55,719 --> 00:51:59,279
Speaker 2: are we They look gross? It never looks normal. I mean,

864
00:51:59,760 --> 00:52:03,000
Speaker 2: I can I can't picture a single braided beard that

865
00:52:03,080 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 2: I've thought. Good for you for braiding your facial hair.

866
00:52:06,840 --> 00:52:10,000
Speaker 2: You're right, I could. Maybe I'm wrong. I No, I'm

867
00:52:10,040 --> 00:52:16,719
Speaker 2: not wrong. I've got I've got to stand up for

868
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:20,040
Speaker 2: what I know is right. And I think beard braids

869
00:52:20,120 --> 00:52:23,600
Speaker 2: are gross. I think that's just kind of the the

870
00:52:23,760 --> 00:52:25,560
Speaker 2: end of the discussion on a beard braid.

871
00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:29,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're right, I guess I think beard long beards,

872
00:52:29,880 --> 00:52:30,960
Speaker 3: if it's long enough to.

873
00:52:30,920 --> 00:52:32,640
Speaker 4: Be a braid, it's already gross.

874
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:36,000
Speaker 3: So I just thought easier maintenance if it's a braid.

875
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 2: But you're right, Yeah, I feel like when you're braiding it,

876
00:52:38,760 --> 00:52:42,640
Speaker 2: you're acknowledging that it's a problem and you should probably

877
00:52:42,680 --> 00:52:47,320
Speaker 2: just trim it or something. Right, we're not doing beard braids.

878
00:52:47,480 --> 00:52:51,760
Speaker 2: They're a curse. Finally, this is not a listener's suggestion.

879
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:56,239
Speaker 2: This is another one from the host himself. Give you

880
00:52:56,280 --> 00:52:58,640
Speaker 2: a curse the taste of envelope glue.

881
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:05,400
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm so surprised to find myself saying this, but

882
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 3: it's a gift. I've never had a bad experience with

883
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:14,520
Speaker 3: envelope glue. I've only it's only ever been pleasant.

884
00:53:15,880 --> 00:53:20,640
Speaker 2: Martha we're on the same page. I think the taste

885
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:22,919
Speaker 2: of envelope glue is just a nice little It doesn't

886
00:53:22,920 --> 00:53:25,359
Speaker 2: need to even taste like anything. It probably I mean

887
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:28,560
Speaker 2: glue probably should taste bad. And I feel like envelope

888
00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:31,600
Speaker 2: glue is always kind of isn't mint. What is happening there?

889
00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:36,759
Speaker 2: Are they flavoring it or is it? Yeah, because it

890
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:40,279
Speaker 2: doesn't taste like what I imagine glue would taste like. Yeah,

891
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:43,200
Speaker 2: you know, it's kind of like a refreshing little boot

892
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:47,719
Speaker 2: when you're going to seal an envelope, and I feel

893
00:53:47,760 --> 00:53:49,680
Speaker 2: like there should be more of a They need to

894
00:53:49,680 --> 00:53:52,880
Speaker 2: be playing with those flavors more. That has like a

895
00:53:52,920 --> 00:53:57,400
Speaker 2: whole market to me, you know, do like a strawberrea cinnamon.

896
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:02,440
Speaker 3: What about if they were pizza flavored and we had

897
00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:05,440
Speaker 3: that as some of our earliest merch for our pizza

898
00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 3: true crime podcasts.

899
00:54:07,600 --> 00:54:10,279
Speaker 2: That's incredible. And then we you know, what we do

900
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:13,799
Speaker 2: is we ask we don't allow listeners to email, We

901
00:54:13,880 --> 00:54:16,719
Speaker 2: ask them to write in so they're needing to use

902
00:54:16,719 --> 00:54:20,400
Speaker 2: these envelopes over and over and over where it's basically

903
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:22,799
Speaker 2: you know, I don't know what the term would be

904
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:25,600
Speaker 2: for that, but we're creating a product which we're then

905
00:54:26,560 --> 00:54:29,920
Speaker 2: demanding the user use, and then they have to keep

906
00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:32,759
Speaker 2: using it over and over. That alone is a multimillion

907
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:35,759
Speaker 2: dollar business, in addition to the fact that this podcast

908
00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:36,759
Speaker 2: takes off.

909
00:54:37,600 --> 00:54:40,120
Speaker 3: If anything is going to get us to the Mountain

910
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 3: Girl as it's going to be our pizza flavored envelope.

911
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 2: Glue glue that tastes kind of like cheese and meat

912
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:54,479
Speaker 2: and bread. I think that that's an excellent idea. Look,

913
00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:56,680
Speaker 2: you got two out of three there. I think that

914
00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:59,480
Speaker 2: that's pretty good. Martha. We have to do one more

915
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:02,040
Speaker 2: part of the podcast. This is called I said no emails.

916
00:55:02,360 --> 00:55:04,800
Speaker 2: People are writing into I said no gifts at gmail

917
00:55:04,840 --> 00:55:07,400
Speaker 2: dot com. Every one of them has a different problem,

918
00:55:07,520 --> 00:55:10,840
Speaker 2: a different question about gift, giving this or receiving gifts,

919
00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:14,959
Speaker 2: whatever gifts. You know, do all kinds of things for people.

920
00:55:14,960 --> 00:55:16,160
Speaker 2: Will you help me answer one or two?

921
00:55:16,680 --> 00:55:17,400
Speaker 4: I would love to.

922
00:55:18,239 --> 00:55:20,440
Speaker 2: Now this is a little special treat for listeners. I

923
00:55:20,480 --> 00:55:22,960
Speaker 2: actually did some work in advance today. This is the

924
00:55:23,000 --> 00:55:25,640
Speaker 2: first time I've ever done this. I found a question

925
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:29,840
Speaker 2: that I think you, Martha, are particularly equipped to answer,

926
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:32,440
Speaker 2: and hopefully you will be let me read it. It's

927
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:37,960
Speaker 2: also extremely long, so everybody buckle up. This says Hello

928
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:40,680
Speaker 2: Bridger and phenomenal guests, so they're off to a good start.

929
00:55:41,080 --> 00:55:43,120
Speaker 2: I live in a condo complex and we have an

930
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:48,320
Speaker 2: outdoor cat. Whenever our favorite property slash grounds manager, Dennis

931
00:55:48,360 --> 00:55:51,480
Speaker 2: is working, she dashes outside immediately to spend the day

932
00:55:51,520 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 2: with him. She absolutely adores him and follows him around

933
00:55:54,440 --> 00:55:56,719
Speaker 2: all day until his shift is over. He brings us

934
00:55:56,760 --> 00:55:59,919
Speaker 2: cat treats, toys, wet food, and occasionally he brings present

935
00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:04,560
Speaker 2: for our dog as well. Recently, she the cat has

936
00:56:04,600 --> 00:56:06,959
Speaker 2: been getting a little braver about the distance she will

937
00:56:07,000 --> 00:56:09,760
Speaker 2: travel to meet new friends and take in new sights.

938
00:56:10,120 --> 00:56:12,520
Speaker 2: Dennis works at multiple properties, so every once in a

939
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:14,879
Speaker 2: while she will find him, and he is kind enough

940
00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:17,120
Speaker 2: to walk her home on his breaks and or call

941
00:56:17,200 --> 00:56:20,560
Speaker 2: us when when he's hanging out with her to ensure

942
00:56:20,680 --> 00:56:24,200
Speaker 2: she's okay. There have been times she hasn't come home

943
00:56:24,480 --> 00:56:26,400
Speaker 2: for a night or two, and Dennis is always eager

944
00:56:26,440 --> 00:56:28,759
Speaker 2: to keep an eye out for her and return her

945
00:56:28,840 --> 00:56:31,560
Speaker 2: when he sees her. I would very much like to

946
00:56:31,560 --> 00:56:33,279
Speaker 2: get a gift for him to thank him for his

947
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:37,120
Speaker 2: extraordinary care for our sweet girl. A few things about Dennis.

948
00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 2: He always says he hates people but loves animals. He

949
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:41,600
Speaker 2: tells me he has three dogs and two cats and

950
00:56:41,640 --> 00:56:44,120
Speaker 2: a horse at home. He works seven days a week.

951
00:56:44,320 --> 00:56:47,799
Speaker 2: He doesn't drink, drink or partake in drug I sure

952
00:56:47,880 --> 00:56:49,799
Speaker 2: do love Dennis, and I'm hoping you can aid me

953
00:56:49,840 --> 00:56:53,000
Speaker 2: and finding the perfect gift for this generous spirit. Thank you,

954
00:56:53,480 --> 00:56:58,160
Speaker 2: And that's signed Teal. Teal has this Dennis who I'm

955
00:56:58,200 --> 00:57:01,200
Speaker 2: immediately just thinking Dennis is slow trying to, you know,

956
00:57:01,600 --> 00:57:04,279
Speaker 2: kidnap the cat. He's giving the cat food at home

957
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:05,960
Speaker 2: or something. So tilla. I just want you to be

958
00:57:06,360 --> 00:57:08,960
Speaker 2: aware that that's a possibility. Dennis may not be the

959
00:57:09,040 --> 00:57:12,560
Speaker 2: sweet person that you think he is. We've seen it

960
00:57:12,600 --> 00:57:16,480
Speaker 2: happen before. That said Martha, what are your thoughts, just

961
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:20,800
Speaker 2: initially about Dennis and giving this surface level kind man

962
00:57:20,960 --> 00:57:21,880
Speaker 2: a gift.

963
00:57:22,680 --> 00:57:25,720
Speaker 3: My first thought was I was going to say give

964
00:57:25,840 --> 00:57:30,760
Speaker 3: him that cat as a gift, But then he has

965
00:57:31,000 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 3: dogs and cats already, so he might not. He may

966
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:38,240
Speaker 3: have taken her if he could have already, maybe he

967
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:39,680
Speaker 3: can have another one.

968
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:42,840
Speaker 2: I feel like they're slowly hypnotizing the cat.

969
00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:48,760
Speaker 3: I mean, my feeling about outside cats is if if

970
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:49,560
Speaker 3: you can give.

971
00:57:49,400 --> 00:57:50,520
Speaker 4: Them an indoor home.

972
00:57:51,360 --> 00:57:58,000
Speaker 3: Then then you when because but although my cats hate

973
00:57:58,080 --> 00:58:04,040
Speaker 3: not going outdoors, so disregard that part. I mean, I

974
00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:11,000
Speaker 3: would either give him like a really a really delicious,

975
00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:14,800
Speaker 3: fancy gift basket with a lot of cookies and candies

976
00:58:14,840 --> 00:58:20,480
Speaker 3: and delicious stuff, because because everybody loves food, if I'm

977
00:58:20,480 --> 00:58:25,160
Speaker 3: not mistaken. And then but what I love more than

978
00:58:25,200 --> 00:58:30,240
Speaker 3: anything as a gift or something I just find on

979
00:58:30,320 --> 00:58:33,880
Speaker 3: the sidewalk on occasion is just cash. So you could

980
00:58:33,920 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 3: just give him a bunch.

981
00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:41,480
Speaker 2: Of everyone loves cash, Yeah, I.

982
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:43,280
Speaker 4: Love it so much.

983
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:48,040
Speaker 3: I'm not a materialistic person and I don't I don't

984
00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 3: care how much money other people have, so I don't

985
00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:53,680
Speaker 3: know if I I mean, I guess that means I'm

986
00:58:53,680 --> 00:58:57,479
Speaker 3: not like a money oriented person. But oh my god,

987
00:58:57,520 --> 00:59:00,400
Speaker 3: I love cash.

988
00:59:00,480 --> 00:59:06,200
Speaker 2: There's something surprising and comforting about just cash that nobody

989
00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:09,080
Speaker 2: can deny because no matter whether you're going to buy

990
00:59:09,120 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 2: yourself something nice or you're just going to pay rent,

991
00:59:12,480 --> 00:59:15,080
Speaker 2: it's going to we're all trapped in a thing that

992
00:59:15,120 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 2: we have to constantly be paying for things. So it's

993
00:59:17,760 --> 00:59:22,360
Speaker 2: just a nice little, yeah thing that Dennis probably won't deny.

994
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,240
Speaker 2: I mean, he might buy his horse some oats, with it.

995
00:59:27,240 --> 00:59:31,960
Speaker 3: Actually, yeah, I would maybe maybe do, depending on how

996
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:35,360
Speaker 3: much how many people are going to go in on

997
00:59:35,400 --> 00:59:39,920
Speaker 3: this gift for him at the condo complex, you could

998
00:59:39,960 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 3: go gourmet treat basket, another basket with some like horse

999
00:59:46,360 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 3: treats and dog and cat treats for his pets, and

1000
00:59:50,360 --> 00:59:55,760
Speaker 3: then in there cash or like just one of those

1001
00:59:55,920 --> 01:00:00,400
Speaker 3: visa gift cards for a long realm or something, because

1002
01:00:00,440 --> 01:00:03,640
Speaker 3: maybe that would be a little bit I might be

1003
01:00:03,840 --> 01:00:07,200
Speaker 3: a hillbilly for just wanting a fat wad of dirty

1004
01:00:07,280 --> 01:00:10,440
Speaker 3: cash as a gift.

1005
01:00:11,320 --> 01:00:16,280
Speaker 2: I don't think so. I think that's a nice treats

1006
01:00:16,360 --> 01:00:19,439
Speaker 2: for the entire family essentially, is what you're saying. Yeah,

1007
01:00:19,480 --> 01:00:23,960
Speaker 2: maybe a brush for the horse. How about a painting

1008
01:00:24,000 --> 01:00:25,920
Speaker 2: of this cath that he loves so much that he

1009
01:00:26,200 --> 01:00:27,240
Speaker 2: obviously wants.

1010
01:00:28,200 --> 01:00:33,800
Speaker 3: Actually, that has reminded me. There's somebody on Instagram, a

1011
01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:37,640
Speaker 3: young woman who's probably just at a high school, who

1012
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:40,200
Speaker 3: if you send her pictures of your pets, she'll do

1013
01:00:40,640 --> 01:00:43,000
Speaker 3: a portrait. She'll paint a portrait of them.

1014
01:00:43,560 --> 01:00:45,680
Speaker 4: Oh and I did that, and the.

1015
01:00:47,560 --> 01:00:50,520
Speaker 3: Looks on their faces like, she doesn't just copy the

1016
01:00:50,560 --> 01:00:54,400
Speaker 3: pictures you send, she captures your pets personality and it's

1017
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:55,280
Speaker 3: so sweet.

1018
01:00:55,640 --> 01:00:56,560
Speaker 2: Do you know her name?

1019
01:00:57,080 --> 01:00:59,680
Speaker 3: I can find her and email it to you, and

1020
01:00:59,720 --> 01:01:04,680
Speaker 3: then this listener could look where would you you could

1021
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:05,720
Speaker 3: email it to her?

1022
01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:09,040
Speaker 2: Yeah? That sounds like a lot of work for me, Martha,

1023
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:13,560
Speaker 2: But sure you're now making me the in between between

1024
01:01:13,600 --> 01:01:16,400
Speaker 2: an Etsy seller and a listener who may or may

1025
01:01:16,440 --> 01:01:16,880
Speaker 2: not care.

1026
01:01:18,400 --> 01:01:20,160
Speaker 3: Well, you could you could.

1027
01:01:21,360 --> 01:01:24,600
Speaker 2: Look, listener. If you hear this and you want the email,

1028
01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:27,120
Speaker 2: I'll get in touch with Martha. We'll get you the

1029
01:01:27,120 --> 01:01:32,439
Speaker 2: Etsy seller. There are some wonderful Etsy painters, whether it's

1030
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:37,400
Speaker 2: this high schooler or you know whoever else, will paint

1031
01:01:37,400 --> 01:01:40,080
Speaker 2: a picture of a pet. Yeah, and I think that

1032
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 2: would be great for Dennis. Dennis obviously hates people and

1033
01:01:44,160 --> 01:01:47,480
Speaker 2: uh probably has a taste for the arts. Yeah, that

1034
01:01:47,600 --> 01:01:52,000
Speaker 2: sounds good, Martha. I feel like we did such an exhaustive,

1035
01:01:53,120 --> 01:01:58,880
Speaker 2: in depth gift suggestion for this teal that the next

1036
01:01:58,880 --> 01:02:00,400
Speaker 2: person on my list is just not going to get

1037
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:03,160
Speaker 2: any advice today. I think we've done enough, and so

1038
01:02:03,280 --> 01:02:05,160
Speaker 2: I won't even say the next person's name because I

1039
01:02:05,200 --> 01:02:07,600
Speaker 2: don't want to make them mad. But you know, maybe

1040
01:02:07,600 --> 01:02:09,920
Speaker 2: that person will get answered next week. Maybe they won't.

1041
01:02:10,240 --> 01:02:13,080
Speaker 2: It's very you know, we can only give so much.

1042
01:02:13,360 --> 01:02:16,240
Speaker 2: We have to work on ourselves as well. And so

1043
01:02:16,560 --> 01:02:20,560
Speaker 2: we've done a little service today. And look, you have

1044
01:02:20,680 --> 01:02:24,880
Speaker 2: donated to this gorilla fund, and I get to kind

1045
01:02:24,920 --> 01:02:27,960
Speaker 2: of just write on your coat tales of charity. We

1046
01:02:28,080 --> 01:02:32,040
Speaker 2: get a picture of this beautiful little gorilla. God knows

1047
01:02:32,080 --> 01:02:35,000
Speaker 2: whether we'll get a video or photos as promised by

1048
01:02:35,040 --> 01:02:38,240
Speaker 2: the Dianne Fosse Gorilla Fund. That's neither here nor there.

1049
01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:41,440
Speaker 2: If it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, look hopefully

1050
01:02:41,440 --> 01:02:43,080
Speaker 2: the gorillas get more protection.

1051
01:02:44,600 --> 01:02:48,400
Speaker 3: Well, I really kind of fumbled that gift. Why not

1052
01:02:48,560 --> 01:02:51,479
Speaker 3: only does it not say it's for you, it has

1053
01:02:51,600 --> 01:02:55,120
Speaker 3: my name on the certificate, but also you couldn't see

1054
01:02:55,160 --> 01:02:58,120
Speaker 3: the pictures or the video. But I will at least

1055
01:02:58,200 --> 01:03:00,560
Speaker 3: figure out the video and picture your part.

1056
01:03:02,200 --> 01:03:04,640
Speaker 2: You've got to do whatever you've got to do, Martha.

1057
01:03:04,680 --> 01:03:08,760
Speaker 2: I don't want to put any pressure. I think ultimately

1058
01:03:09,400 --> 01:03:14,240
Speaker 2: what's important is that we're both happy and comfortable and safe.

1059
01:03:14,600 --> 01:03:20,080
Speaker 3: And I'm not happy ever, and I'm barely comfortable, but

1060
01:03:20,160 --> 01:03:22,040
Speaker 3: as far as I know, I'm currently safe.

1061
01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:27,080
Speaker 2: So okay, Martha, I've had just a wonderful time with you,

1062
01:03:27,240 --> 01:03:28,360
Speaker 2: and thank you so much.

1063
01:03:28,400 --> 01:03:30,919
Speaker 3: For being here, thanks for having me.

1064
01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:35,280
Speaker 2: Of course, and everybody go. If you have somebody you

1065
01:03:35,360 --> 01:03:36,840
Speaker 2: need to give a gift in your life, find a

1066
01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:40,440
Speaker 2: fund like this and donate in their name or yours

1067
01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:43,800
Speaker 2: and give that as a gift. It's a special surprise

1068
01:03:43,880 --> 01:03:49,200
Speaker 2: that feels like it helps the world. And ultimately, this

1069
01:03:49,360 --> 01:03:51,440
Speaker 2: is the end of the podcast. I'm going to let

1070
01:03:51,480 --> 01:03:54,760
Speaker 2: you go. I will talk to you soon. Take care

1071
01:03:54,800 --> 01:04:04,160
Speaker 2: of yourself. I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production.

1072
01:04:04,720 --> 01:04:08,680
Speaker 2: It's produced and engineered by our dear friend Annalise Nelson,

1073
01:04:08,960 --> 01:04:12,280
Speaker 2: and the theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann.

1074
01:04:12,760 --> 01:04:16,600
Speaker 2: You must follow the show on Instagram at I said

1075
01:04:16,720 --> 01:04:19,880
Speaker 2: No Gifts. That's where you're going to see pictures of

1076
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:22,840
Speaker 2: all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. You have to see

1077
01:04:22,840 --> 01:04:28,080
Speaker 2: the gifts. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or

1078
01:04:28,120 --> 01:04:31,120
Speaker 2: wherever you found me. And why not leave a review

1079
01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:34,040
Speaker 2: while you're there. It's really the least you could do,

1080
01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:37,840
Speaker 2: considering everything I do for you. And if you're interested

1081
01:04:37,840 --> 01:04:41,360
Speaker 2: in advertising on the show, go to midrol dot com

1082
01:04:41,400 --> 01:04:42,480
Speaker 2: slash ads.

1083
01:04:44,080 --> 01:04:46,040
Speaker 3: Well, I invit, did you hear?

1084
01:04:48,400 --> 01:04:54,000
Speaker 1: Funa man? Myself perfectly clear, But you're a guest to Merha,

1085
01:04:56,520 --> 01:05:02,520
Speaker 1: you gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guest,

1086
01:05:02,880 --> 01:05:09,760
Speaker 1: your presence is presence enough. I already had too much stuff,

1087
01:05:10,440 --> 01:05:13,600
Speaker 1: So how do you dare to surbey me?