Speaker 1: The Black Fat Film Podcast is a production of iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: and Doctor John Paul LLC. Hey everyone, welcome to another
Speaker 1: episode of the blockfests and podcast were all the intersections
Speaker 1: of it in are celebrated. I am one of your hosts, John,
Speaker 1: also known as Doctor John's Paul. And while you were
Speaker 1: on nuke Map trying to figure out how safe you
Speaker 1: would be if I ran did decide to be good
Speaker 1: dang unless you came to bang bombs over bad dad.
Speaker 2: Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Speaker 1: I know it's not funny, but you got a laugh
Speaker 1: to keep from crying while you were worried about retaliation.
Speaker 1: Whoo my god. I was on the Buljangos website trying
Speaker 1: to find out why none of them holes open in
Speaker 1: our area yet. So this is the thing. Don't promise
Speaker 1: me something and then go back on it. Bojangles, you
Speaker 1: told me a year ago that you would have three
Speaker 1: locations in LA and I have not seen one of
Speaker 1: them locate ships. I need answers. Where is your scooter?
Speaker 2: Girl?
Speaker 1: Where is your scooter?
Speaker 2: Anyway?
Speaker 1: How are you? Joh?
Speaker 3: I cannot with you, John, I cannot. I can't you
Speaker 3: come out the gates with that? Knowing full well, I
Speaker 3: was I was eight. I bet you me up when
Speaker 3: I when I posted about Iran Earl earlier last week.
Speaker 3: So I ain't saying shakep my mouth shut. I'm just
Speaker 3: saying in my lane doing the most people who I
Speaker 3: was out here trying people was out here speaking on
Speaker 3: my name. It was it was wild. I mean, I
Speaker 3: can I can hold, I can hold. I messed up, y'all,
Speaker 3: but y'all came.
Speaker 2: Too much on me. I was like, y'all even calm down,
Speaker 2: like y'all I I I probably ever slipped.
Speaker 3: Let's relax, relox and truthfully all y'all coming from me,
Speaker 3: Let's be less, let's let's talk to you honestly.
Speaker 2: You want one time post all by folks, but.
Speaker 3: Here we are, here, we are Yeah, the man of times.
Speaker 3: People are be like I can't believe you would do that.
Speaker 3: Like I just I sho something that was a very
Speaker 3: real valid fear that everyone's like, how do you share this?
Speaker 2: I was like, you don't share it about black people? Girl?
Speaker 1: Why are you in my DMS?
Speaker 3: Like I appreciate a call in, I love a calling. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it was just like the several messages of like how
Speaker 3: dare you?
Speaker 2: How dare you? What was crazy, girl crazy.
Speaker 1: This is so, this is what I have to say
Speaker 1: right before we get into our episode. I think you know,
Speaker 1: like we talked about not last week, but the week
Speaker 1: before last. We talked about this idea of people walking
Speaker 1: around like they are higher, highly mighty bit better. And
Speaker 1: you know, I'm because I do social justice the right
Speaker 1: the way, I am better than you. And it's that girl,
Speaker 1: you are the set you you ship the same way.
Speaker 3: I ship, because are you just like I'm tired of people,
Speaker 3: people missing, people mistaking theory for process, Like I'm really
Speaker 3: tired of just like like I actually don't care about
Speaker 3: out how many books you were, actually don't care about
Speaker 3: what my education background was that part?
Speaker 2: I here, are you actually in the streets? Do in
Speaker 2: the work?
Speaker 3: Are you? Like like I'm and a lot of are
Speaker 3: I Like I'm exhausting, I'm exhausting myself trying to work
Speaker 3: for the black transpiity.
Speaker 2: Here and there you go like, yeah, I don't have
Speaker 2: time for the books.
Speaker 3: You don't have time for the art the artic Just
Speaker 3: send me are you doing the working out if you
Speaker 3: have no outcome? If you have, we're doing in practice,
Speaker 3: Like I cannot walk with you now, but Anyway, Anyways, y'all,
Speaker 3: it's a girl Jordan aka tig Girl Joho, and I
Speaker 3: just have to say no, no, I'm gonna say it
Speaker 3: with my no man pants because y'all was.
Speaker 2: Busted. I was being tested today by the little busses.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, fine, Well, as we always do, we're gonna
Speaker 1: start off our show by giving flowers Star Girl, Miss
Speaker 1: Tisha Campbell and are still here segment Tisha girl, come
Speaker 1: on dad to this. Oh, let's talk. I'm gonna keep
Speaker 1: putting this out to somebody hear it and invite her
Speaker 1: own and let her know that she's got She's got us,
Speaker 1: she's got a chair with us. But with that being said,
Speaker 1: this week, considering that Pride Month is officially over. By
Speaker 1: the time you hear this, you will hear this on
Speaker 1: July first, Pride Week will be done. Start off, yes,
Speaker 1: Pride months. Yeah, Pride Month will be done. I Pride week,
Speaker 1: but Pride Month will be done. I wanted to start
Speaker 1: off this week's episode by asking the question, what is
Speaker 1: something you may have prayed for this year or even
Speaker 1: prayed for, you know under this new moon or you
Speaker 1: know under under the under the pride, under the pride month,
Speaker 1: you know, the culmination of things. What is something you
Speaker 1: may have prayed for that you are happy to see,
Speaker 1: something that you're happy to see coming to fruition. I know,
Speaker 1: for me, I will say this so at the beginning
Speaker 1: of this year, and I've talked about it on the show,
Speaker 1: I've talked about it in different you know fast as,
Speaker 1: I have even posted about it on social media. I know,
Speaker 1: for me, I posted very earlier in the year that
Speaker 1: I since losing my friend, losing my best friend to COVID,
Speaker 1: and since kind of coming out of COVID, I felt
Speaker 1: sort of isolated and feeling as if like I don't
Speaker 1: have the closeness or the connections that I maybe once
Speaker 1: had with certain people or even certain groups of people
Speaker 1: prior to the pandemic. And so at the top of
Speaker 1: the year, that was one of my prayers. My prayers was,
Speaker 1: you know, God, please, if there's people in my circle
Speaker 1: who are not feeding me, let them go on and
Speaker 1: do what they need to do on their end. And
Speaker 1: if there are people who really want to pour into me,
Speaker 1: come on down over here, you know. And I want
Speaker 1: to make sure that I don't take away from the
Speaker 1: you know, the stuff you do or the things that
Speaker 1: my partner does, or even some of the listeners. Right,
Speaker 1: we have a lot of listeners who are close friends
Speaker 1: of both of ours, right, or people that really go
Speaker 1: up from me and really go up for you too.
Speaker 1: So I don't want to take away from that, but
Speaker 1: I will say when I said this prayer, that was
Speaker 1: probably the first prayer I had said like out loud
Speaker 1: where it wasn't just a kind of like a you know,
Speaker 1: I was intentional. I set down and I prayed to
Speaker 1: the universe and I said, and again this is something
Speaker 1: I rarely do. I really really said, God, please just
Speaker 1: put good people in my life so I can feel
Speaker 1: like I have a solid you know, I have a
Speaker 1: solid group of friends, and literally, people out of the
Speaker 1: blue just started kind of like showing up. And that's
Speaker 1: that's what tells me. And I know I say this
Speaker 1: a lot, and I joke, you know, this is what
Speaker 1: tells me that God is real. Because now I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm having friends hit me and be like, hey,
Speaker 1: do you want to do this this month? Hey do
Speaker 1: we want to go book that? Or Hey do you
Speaker 1: want to come over to do this thing? Or do
Speaker 1: you want to and it and it just feels really
Speaker 1: good to see in like real time that the universe
Speaker 1: is answering my prayers. So yeah, like even thinking about
Speaker 1: everybody who showed up for my book talk like and
Speaker 1: how folks are using their platforms to help me lift mine,
Speaker 1: like shout out to Delta. Yeah, I was on Delta.
Speaker 1: I was on very Delta, you know, last week obviously,
Speaker 1: And so it's just a lot of stuff has just
Speaker 1: been kind of culminating to show me like people really
Speaker 1: got me and the universe is answering my prayers. So
Speaker 1: it's like it feels like God is like God has
Speaker 1: not forgotten about me, and it just God, don't play
Speaker 1: about your girl.
Speaker 2: God don't yeah about you.
Speaker 1: Amen. Amen.
Speaker 3: He does it every day every day, you know. I
Speaker 3: think for me, then I prayed for probably something for fruition.
Speaker 2: I think i've this year. I think I said into
Speaker 2: my blackness in a new way. I think that's been
Speaker 2: really amazing.
Speaker 3: Like getting my getting my hair braided has been like
Speaker 3: a really fun expression of like I feeling better. And
Speaker 3: so I think like I prayed for like more comfort,
Speaker 3: like another level of come for my blackness. I think
Speaker 3: also becoming President of Black Pride was like a hard
Speaker 3: thing for me because I was like, am I black
Speaker 3: enough for this?
Speaker 2: For like myriad reasons, And so I think I prayed.
Speaker 3: I think I prayed for like I think I prayed
Speaker 3: for like like I definitely I prayed like universe, like
Speaker 3: let me know that this is the right path for me.
Speaker 3: Give like give me the courage to step into myself
Speaker 3: more and like you know, like like they they they please,
Speaker 3: like because like let me leave with the authentic version
Speaker 3: of myself. And it's been happening, and I'm very very
Speaker 3: thankful for that. I'm very thankful that I feel good.
Speaker 3: I feel tired, but I know, like we have so
Speaker 3: much good ideas what we're doing, and we're doing so
Speaker 3: much good work. I'm excited and like, like you know,
Speaker 3: like like even just like today we met with a
Speaker 3: potential partner and it was a really great conversation, and
Speaker 3: so I'm like, I feel really good about.
Speaker 2: The idea I feel about like who I am.
Speaker 3: As about person and how I'm showing up in my
Speaker 3: blackness and the like and like and like like it's
Speaker 3: giving them more as you make more confidence in myself
Speaker 3: in other ways, it's been really amazing. So I think
Speaker 3: that's been coming to fruition, like just like more self,
Speaker 3: more self advocacy, more self, more self atteration, more self
Speaker 3: belief in a new.
Speaker 2: And new powerful ways. So yeah, and that's my life.
Speaker 1: Yeah. No, And I will say this just you know, lovingly.
Speaker 1: I will say, keep in mind that some of these
Speaker 1: questions that we have about ourselves and how we show
Speaker 1: up in this world are tools of white supremacy, you know,
Speaker 1: a tool to keep you, you know, questioning your existence
Speaker 1: in a world. And so are you black enough? Who
Speaker 1: the fuck cares? Keep doing it? You know, keep showing
Speaker 1: up in whatever way you want to show up. And
Speaker 1: you know, again, at the end of the day, the
Speaker 1: work is gonna get done. And that's the thing I
Speaker 1: want to say that I definitely want to hold is that,
Speaker 1: you know, I appreciate seeing folks like you out here
Speaker 1: doing things like Black Pride and all these other things
Speaker 1: that you're doing because it reminds me of the stuff
Speaker 1: I'm passionate about and the stuff I need to be doing.
Speaker 1: So I definitely just wanted to give you your flowers
Speaker 1: around that and then braids. Like I said, if I
Speaker 1: wasn't tend to head it, I'd be right behind.
Speaker 2: You know, A girl.
Speaker 3: When we do, when we do our sur sf thing,
Speaker 3: I'll take you to my braider because honestly, she will you.
Speaker 3: You'll be surprised, like, yeah, you fill intender her first,
Speaker 3: but she'll do you right, she'll do you love her.
Speaker 1: I will hold you to it.
Speaker 2: And your braids would be so cute.
Speaker 1: Yeah, even though I got a big ass head, but.
Speaker 2: You will you look so good and and and know it.
Speaker 3: We can buy you some bundles to go into it, bitch,
Speaker 3: you you with a BRIDI of bus down with a
Speaker 3: bad bust down how.
Speaker 2: John, baby idea No, because if you're if, bitch, if
Speaker 2: you're in, I'll buy you the bundles.
Speaker 1: And please please please down and I would summer.
Speaker 3: Please yes, before I let go, I'm yes, yes.
Speaker 1: Please, I'm I am like super here for it. You
Speaker 1: already know that. But with that being said, now that
Speaker 1: we have taken a moment to give our testimony and
Speaker 1: pass the collection plate, we are going to pay our
Speaker 1: tides and take a.
Speaker 3: Moment to take a quick break. We'll be back in
Speaker 3: a second, and we are back famin this week. John's
Speaker 3: the driver's seat. We're talking about something that based on
Speaker 3: social media. Now I know John your shild footed with
Speaker 3: me where person was talking about how epigenetics and the
Speaker 3: distrust they have related to certain things.
Speaker 2: You asked if I believe in epigenetics.
Speaker 3: And the thought about how it might drive some of
Speaker 3: the generational, generational crystial things we about we have about
Speaker 3: stainth things for ourselves. So I know for me, like,
Speaker 3: I definitely like sometimes I joke, like I joke with friends,
Speaker 3: like the sound of gas triggers me.
Speaker 2: Holocaust, like gas.
Speaker 1: Didn't know, get out of here. I am done with you.
Speaker 1: Get out of here.
Speaker 3: If I if I, if I, if I see a
Speaker 3: treat a treat bench rope, I'm like, I'm like, I
Speaker 3: freeze up.
Speaker 2: But like, but like, I like, I really do think
Speaker 2: there's certain.
Speaker 1: Earlier.
Speaker 2: It's an earlier. Girl, you got a laugh to keep
Speaker 2: from crying.
Speaker 3: I think you know for me, there are I do believe.
Speaker 3: I do believe in the idea that so yes, the
Speaker 3: idea that in intergenerational trauma, like I think changes the
Speaker 3: expression of every DNA.
Speaker 2: I'm not scientists, so I don't know how they how
Speaker 2: may we phrase.
Speaker 3: I don't know if it changes specivity in a or
Speaker 3: rather like it pages your your behaviors and how they
Speaker 3: trust themselves. Like I definitely do think that the way
Speaker 3: or like way stress like happens, right, because there are
Speaker 3: times where I think, like I can handle a lot
Speaker 3: of stress, like I can physically in allow of stress.
Speaker 2: Some people can ancelss at all. I can hand a
Speaker 2: lot of stress because.
Speaker 3: Like both my families have had really stressful experiences and
Speaker 3: histories themselves, you know, very and very much like Bootshet
Speaker 3: mentality in the sense of like you gotta keep it going,
Speaker 3: keep a pushing, even things going wrong. And I think
Speaker 3: that is definitely like intergenerational, like not just in terms
Speaker 3: of values like immigrant values, right, but.
Speaker 2: Like values of like danger, hysteria or survival.
Speaker 3: You know, I think, I think instead of survival, instincts
Speaker 3: are passed down, you know, instincts about about being resourceful
Speaker 3: are passed down. I think, I think like you know,
Speaker 3: I think like like I think I have a certain
Speaker 3: intuition in like in myself that I think is like
Speaker 3: also past like that to me is passed out for sure,
Speaker 3: like because I know people my family have had intuitions, right,
Speaker 3: a different level of spiritual.
Speaker 2: Connection into something. So I you know, I do believe
Speaker 2: in it.
Speaker 3: I do believe like I do believe that there are
Speaker 3: that there are ways in which things, like you know,
Speaker 3: things change how we are. But I also I also
Speaker 3: think though, like like like what I think about last night,
Speaker 3: Imber made so like this is really interesting and silly.
Speaker 2: But like.
Speaker 3: Growing up, if my dad, if I left and I
Speaker 3: left a light on anywhere in the house, like in
Speaker 3: the like in the layout of my house growing up,
Speaker 3: like the the front of the house was living room,
Speaker 3: family room.
Speaker 2: We have too, living room and family room, dinning room, kitchen,
Speaker 2: and then hallway and then parents room, my.
Speaker 3: Room and in my mom's office. Right so like three bedroom,
Speaker 3: two bad house like like like quite like quite a
Speaker 3: good size. But like but like you don't see lights,
Speaker 3: So you don't see lights from like the family room
Speaker 3: or living room, from my from my parents' bedroom.
Speaker 2: But my dad would just know if a light was on.
Speaker 3: He'd like Jordan, Jordan, turn the light off, like anywhere
Speaker 3: around he will.
Speaker 2: Know that a light is on.
Speaker 3: Like yeah, that dou was like my mom my mama
Speaker 3: not care that that man was like the like like
Speaker 3: I try to stay by Jordan the light, what light
Speaker 3: the one thing that hang?
Speaker 2: What's on? My guy?
Speaker 3: Like and now as an adult if if like if
Speaker 3: I'm in if I'm I'm in bed even MirOS closed,
Speaker 3: if any light is on like my roomates like the
Speaker 3: I sense it, I'm like I cannot sleep light And
Speaker 3: and I was wondering, like this is silly and this ispiculation,
Speaker 3: but like I wonder if part of this is like
Speaker 3: is like like pastor from experiences of slavery, right, how
Speaker 3: many times?
Speaker 2: How many? How many times? Like how many times? How many?
Speaker 1: Because it's like this.
Speaker 2: Is stop.
Speaker 3: How many times we're like sas walking around with lights? Right,
Speaker 3: and like yeah, we're actually fearful of the light that
Speaker 3: was coming towards them, so they were trying to run
Speaker 3: away from right, Okay, when you're right, you smell what
Speaker 3: I'm cooking? I literally, I literally I wonder that's the
Speaker 3: part of it is like it's like being a good
Speaker 3: having like the light right or for example, like like
Speaker 3: like I'm alike sleeper typically so like and whenever if
Speaker 3: I'm ever asleep and someone's not home, be like the
Speaker 3: before they even get to the actual door, I'll wake up,
Speaker 3: like like I like like I will wake up. I'll
Speaker 3: wake up second second before the can the door, I'll
Speaker 3: be like awake, like just like, yeah, you just know,
Speaker 3: I just know so aways yeah.
Speaker 1: Yo, it's I know she's canceled because she's saying at
Speaker 1: the inauguration. But anyway, I was she did, she did?
Speaker 1: She did? She did? Who was jewel? Jewel? She's sag
Speaker 1: at the inauguration? The girl? Oh no, yeah, who will
Speaker 1: say so? But no. So for those so, I think
Speaker 1: this is very interesting and I love that you're talking
Speaker 1: about this in this way. So for those of you
Speaker 1: who are not super into the whole epigenetics conversation, and
Speaker 1: like I said, I want to make sure that folks
Speaker 1: don't think this is just a you know, a lot
Speaker 1: of this is tenfoily, but it also is a real
Speaker 1: thing that I was like, I think this will be
Speaker 1: a great conversation because we've talked about generational curses in
Speaker 1: different facets, but we never really talked about what's the
Speaker 1: stuff that's ingrained in us or what are the things
Speaker 1: that we kind of feel our in our DNA, and
Speaker 1: you know, we're working to kind of undo that. And
Speaker 1: so I was telling Joho, I saw someone talk about
Speaker 1: this the clip or the tweet, and the tweet the
Speaker 1: threat that I saw was a woman talking about the
Speaker 1: ways that you know, all the ways that she distrusts things,
Speaker 1: and how black people innately have distrust built into them
Speaker 1: because of what we've been through and what we've experienced.
Speaker 1: And I said, Wow, this reminds me a lot of
Speaker 1: And again I like to give credit where credit is due.
Speaker 2: I said, this.
Speaker 1: Reminds me a lot of conversation I heard on the
Speaker 1: friend Zone where Frand was talking about epigenetics, and I
Speaker 1: dipped into wanting to understand it more myself. And so,
Speaker 1: for those of you who don't know, epigenetics is this
Speaker 1: concept of of things that are traumatic, things specifically traumatic
Speaker 1: things that are ingrained in your parents' DNA or in
Speaker 1: your parents parents DNA that's passed down to you. And
Speaker 1: so there have been studies and again some of these
Speaker 1: studies are are you know, there's still big question marks
Speaker 1: around what does this truly mean for our DNA? But
Speaker 1: I know one of the studies that they did was
Speaker 1: around some rats, and it was rats that were taught
Speaker 1: to be afraid of cherry blossoms. And basically what they
Speaker 1: would use they would they would basically give rats reasons
Speaker 1: to be afraid of the cherry blossom, and then they
Speaker 1: would let the rats pro create, and then they would
Speaker 1: test the rats that came from whatever batch that were
Speaker 1: being tested and to see how those baby rats would respond.
Speaker 1: And what they found was that the baby rats were
Speaker 1: whenever they would see a cherry blossom or whatever, they
Speaker 1: would military blossom, they would freak out, right, they would,
Speaker 1: the babies would. And so there are all of these studies,
Speaker 1: you know, and again don't I don't know how that
Speaker 1: would would and again there's been no research that has
Speaker 1: tied it to humans, right, But the idea that trauma
Speaker 1: is passed down through generations, it's real. And so I
Speaker 1: had brought this up because, you know, I wanted to
Speaker 1: add a little seasoning to the topic and thinking about
Speaker 1: some of the things that maybe have been passed down
Speaker 1: to us and things that might be keeping us tied
Speaker 1: to this feeling of being quote unquote curse and what
Speaker 1: we might be doing to break them. And I know,
Speaker 1: for me, you know, one of the things that I
Speaker 1: have brought up as I've been dancing around this idea
Speaker 1: of like maybe epigenetics is a thinker, Maybe there needs
Speaker 1: to be more research and epigenetics, right, I think about
Speaker 1: generational curses, and you know, one of the questions that
Speaker 1: I've had is, you know, and maybe this is a
Speaker 1: question that I have more for you, what's your take
Speaker 1: on the idea of generational curses and how have you
Speaker 1: seen them play out in your life? And before you
Speaker 1: answer that, I know, for me, I think one of
Speaker 1: the biggest generational curses that I have seen is this
Speaker 1: idea of feeling like your and again, generational curses as
Speaker 1: we're talking about DNA and epigenetics or feelings, right, this
Speaker 1: idea that you should always be worried about something. I know, worry,
Speaker 1: And I'll talk more about this worry a little bit later,
Speaker 1: but I do know that worry is something that I
Speaker 1: constantly have to fight in my mind every day, and
Speaker 1: that's something that I'm wanting to break. But yeah, what
Speaker 1: about you, what's something that you have seen kind of
Speaker 1: play out in your own life?
Speaker 2: Would be great question. Oh my gosh, such a great question.
Speaker 1: I think I have.
Speaker 3: I have a hard time trusting people to get things done,
Speaker 3: that's for sure. I think it's like a generational CURSI
Speaker 3: it's like asking for help and trusting people get things done,
Speaker 3: I feel, And that's like right in some cases, like
Speaker 3: family history of I cannot be dependent on people because
Speaker 3: you might you might die, like it's life or death.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: My mom always says that if you want to do something,
Speaker 1: you gotta do with yourself.
Speaker 3: Yeah, right, and like, and I think I don't want
Speaker 3: to be that person because I rely on community a lot,
Speaker 3: and I love community. There are some things that I'm like,
Speaker 3: I just like I just don't need help, like I.
Speaker 1: Like I will.
Speaker 2: I never need people to like open doors for me.
Speaker 3: I feel like I do it myself, like if everyone
Speaker 3: want to you, right, I appreciate people do like I
Speaker 3: never I've never asked people to do that because I
Speaker 3: just is not I'm a well because I always think
Speaker 3: someone how might someone might always have a transaction and
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 2: I'm not a transactional person. And in some cases it's
Speaker 2: proven to be true.
Speaker 3: But I think my my like my general genericial curse
Speaker 3: is like not to trust people will do the right
Speaker 3: thing and say and say they'll do what they say
Speaker 3: they'll do.
Speaker 2: And my biggest piece of people who don't say, don't
Speaker 2: say that.
Speaker 3: They'll do like even if even if I'm late, even
Speaker 3: even if it's.
Speaker 2: Like not perfect, I will so do the thing right.
Speaker 3: And people who don't do it and make judge judge
Speaker 3: people wall and I just like I could.
Speaker 2: I shouldn't it myself like I like I should.
Speaker 3: And so I think that is like there is something
Speaker 3: that I was, like a like a Germi show thing
Speaker 3: that I'm trying to unlearn. I think also like my
Speaker 3: sensitivity to potential danger, like.
Speaker 2: I'm always in fire or fast.
Speaker 3: I feel like, yeah, I don't ever feel right, like
Speaker 3: like when I walk into a bar, my first art
Speaker 3: of the exits?
Speaker 2: How do I get there?
Speaker 1: Cloud?
Speaker 2: Do I good right there? At there?
Speaker 1: How do I get out that front?
Speaker 2: I find out if.
Speaker 3: I if I sit down a restaurant, I'm my seat
Speaker 3: usually will case the exits as well.
Speaker 1: So I'm about to railro.
Speaker 3: Because I can't trust that you'll warm me digit comes,
Speaker 3: I'll warn you, but I can't trust you that you'll
Speaker 3: warn this bitch, you know. So I think like those
Speaker 3: are some of the because I have is never feeling
Speaker 3: safe everywhere always, and there's a level of endangerment whatever
Speaker 3: I do, even leading my house.
Speaker 2: You know, when I walk home my nighttime, I walk
Speaker 2: home with my keys between my fingers.
Speaker 3: You know, like I'm You're not if you don't give
Speaker 3: me a girl, I'm gonna scratch.
Speaker 1: You're gonna know that you yes, and then.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're gonna know you're okay.
Speaker 3: If you, if you, if you, if if you, if
Speaker 3: you take me down, you will come out bleeding still,
Speaker 3: like do not do not try it with me like that.
Speaker 3: So I think those are like the curses I have,
Speaker 3: you know, I think I think those are like pretty
Speaker 3: great present ones. I think the other thing is the
Speaker 3: one thing I've one thing I've I've broken occurs is
Speaker 3: scarcity mentality. When it comes to money, I think like
Speaker 3: and not not not not that you're riches rich, like
Speaker 3: not that I'm rich now that I'm got I got
Speaker 3: some money at the wall Zoo.
Speaker 2: But I have work to break the idea.
Speaker 3: Like like like that like that money won't come to me,
Speaker 3: like I believe, like like what how that song go?
Speaker 2: It was like with the money? Was that with the
Speaker 2: money braz Yeah? What a money? Is that money?
Speaker 3: But that like like that's that's like like that's a
Speaker 3: I feel like I've broken the I've broken the curse
Speaker 3: of fling.
Speaker 2: Like things are scarce, Like I think I'm abundant.
Speaker 3: I think things are abundant, like like if I if
Speaker 3: I if I give money, I don't expect it back
Speaker 3: because I know I'll make it back. I hope for
Speaker 3: a back because I want to back, but like I
Speaker 3: put it back because I know I can make.
Speaker 2: It back, you know.
Speaker 3: I like I trust that I'm taken care of. When
Speaker 3: things are hard, I'm like, know what, Like it's a
Speaker 3: hard month. God got me, you never got me? So yeah,
Speaker 3: so that those little bits I think I'm gonna play
Speaker 3: on my life. I'm curious ask you, is there a
Speaker 3: pattern or something in your life that you think you might.
Speaker 2: That might have might have been passed on as well?
Speaker 2: Now have you worked to break it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I will say so. I made mention of this earlier,
Speaker 1: you know, thinking about the worry. But also this, this
Speaker 1: the game of fear is something that I feel like,
Speaker 1: you know, being concerned that there's always going to be
Speaker 1: something that's gonna go wrong. And I think having to
Speaker 1: reframe this, this this feeling of there's always going to
Speaker 1: be something wrong, like even down to like my mom,
Speaker 1: you know, with the traveling, my mom calls me all
Speaker 1: the time, where are you at? What are you doing?
Speaker 1: You know, I just want to make sure you're safe
Speaker 1: and I'm like, Mom, you can, you can rest sure
Speaker 1: and know that I'm okay, Like you don't have to always.
Speaker 1: But again, I know, I know that that's her her
Speaker 1: way of moving and operating, and I think in my
Speaker 1: grandfather it's the same way. And one of the things
Speaker 1: that you know, I don't think I've ever told anybody
Speaker 1: is you know, and I don't even know if you
Speaker 1: know this, but one of my uncles when I was
Speaker 1: younger was was was profiled and attacked and murdered by
Speaker 1: the LAPD. And so knowing my mom, knowing the direct
Speaker 1: connection that my grandfather had to that, and knowing the
Speaker 1: direct connection my mom has to that, I think my
Speaker 1: mom innately and my grandfather innately has always had it
Speaker 1: kind of embedded in them that, you know, we're a target, right,
Speaker 1: no matter what we do, no matter where we go,
Speaker 1: we're always a target. And so I think they're always
Speaker 1: constantly works about that. And that's something I've had to
Speaker 1: kind of like relinquish in my own mind, is like
Speaker 1: I can't constantly live my life day to day being
Speaker 1: worried that something is going to go wrong or that
Speaker 1: I'm something terrible it's gonna happen to me and you know.
Speaker 1: And I think the other part of it too is
Speaker 1: you know, I think you know, being like you said
Speaker 1: to some to one of the pieces that you shared earlier, Right,
Speaker 1: this notion of not being able to trust people, you know,
Speaker 1: it's not even trusting that people are not going to
Speaker 1: do anything. I just for years I just didn't trust
Speaker 1: people in general. I just I don't know your intentions.
Speaker 1: I don't know who you are. I don't know what
Speaker 1: you're trying to bring into the space. I don't trust
Speaker 1: your energy, you know. And I also know that a
Speaker 1: lot of that is religious trauma too. Right, growing up
Speaker 1: in a very religious space, I was taught that your
Speaker 1: other I'm you know, I'm in the right religion. I'm
Speaker 1: doing I know the people who are connected to my
Speaker 1: religion are good people. You're not a good person, so
Speaker 1: I can't trust you. And I think having to like
Speaker 1: unlearn that and just be like, just because someone has
Speaker 1: a different religious belief than you doesn't necessarily in him
Speaker 1: make them a bad person, just unless their religious beliefs
Speaker 1: are rooted in harming you or taking your rights away.
Speaker 1: That's when we have a problem. And I think that's
Speaker 1: something that I've really had to kind of like undo
Speaker 1: around quote unquote, the generational curse is recognizing that, you know, safety,
Speaker 1: safety can mean so many different things for different people.
Speaker 1: But I don't have to constantly live in this place
Speaker 1: as if, you know, I don't have to live in
Speaker 1: Halloween every you know, every day, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't have to there. You know, there's there's not
Speaker 1: that many booths and you know, scary things around the
Speaker 1: corner every day. And I think that some people in
Speaker 1: this and like I said, some of my family, they
Speaker 1: live that way. They lived that way, and I just
Speaker 1: don't necessarily it's how do I say this, It just
Speaker 1: doesn't It's not me. It's not something I want to
Speaker 1: constantly have, Like I don't constantly always want to be
Speaker 1: in this place that you know, all I ever have
Speaker 1: to do in my life is worried because it just
Speaker 1: I mean, and that's what that's the thing I think
Speaker 1: I've learned. I've really learned. You know, I'll even say this.
Speaker 1: You know, my mother, my partner, to an extent, some
Speaker 1: of the other friends and family, I know they're constantly
Speaker 1: worried about the next hour, or the next day or
Speaker 1: the next month. And I'm like baby, You're worried about
Speaker 1: something that hasn't even occurred yet. So why am I
Speaker 1: gonna be worried about being broke tomorrow if I got
Speaker 1: money today and then, like you said, I'm not rich.
Speaker 1: But I also don't go to bed anymore being like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm so worried about where my next
Speaker 1: check is gonna come from. Like, no, I'm just not
Speaker 1: gonna live that way because the reality is is now,
Speaker 1: I've spent this entire week giving out energy into the
Speaker 1: world around something I truly have no control over. I'm
Speaker 1: doing the best that I can. I'm working as much
Speaker 1: as I can. I'm putting out whatever I can to
Speaker 1: let people know that I'm capable of doing a good job,
Speaker 1: and whatever comes back to me is what will come
Speaker 1: back to me. But I just don't have it. And
Speaker 1: I think also part of it is me growing up too, right,
Speaker 1: is recognizing like you don't have to constantly live in
Speaker 1: a state of fear, Like living in a state of
Speaker 1: fear is not something that is conducive to me or
Speaker 1: to the work I want to do in this world.
Speaker 1: If I'm constantly working out of fear, out of out
Speaker 1: of worry, then then then what am I telling other
Speaker 1: people who I'm trying to lift up? What am I
Speaker 1: telling other people who are looking to me for the
Speaker 1: solace and to be uplifted. So that's something that I've
Speaker 1: really had to fight in the last couple of years.
Speaker 1: You know, I would I would like to know, you know,
Speaker 1: I guess thinking about how you've approached this topic when
Speaker 1: you're with your with your family, thinking about this idea
Speaker 1: of like what these curses might mean. And I know
Speaker 1: we've talked about Like I said, we've talked about familial
Speaker 1: things in the past, but like talking directly, I know you,
Speaker 1: I know you've mentioned conversations with your mother. I know
Speaker 1: you've mentioned conversations with your sister and your brothers. I
Speaker 1: would love to know, like the idea that you all
Speaker 1: have to be the ones to put these curses to bed,
Speaker 1: Like what what has that looked like for you? You
Speaker 1: know it is? It is Well, the.
Speaker 2: Conversations with my family are different than the conversations I
Speaker 2: have with like people like my other loved ones, like
Speaker 2: my friends and such. You know, well, we all have.
Speaker 3: Different proximity to what it means to break curses, right,
Speaker 3: Like I share with my mom this idea sometimes I
Speaker 3: don't think, not that she's not interested in breaking curses,
Speaker 3: but I think there is that's a level of self work.
Speaker 2: I don't think she'll.
Speaker 1: She will.
Speaker 3: I totally see her if she's able to or just
Speaker 3: doesn't want to, because like she's lived a full life,
Speaker 3: so it's like, what am I trying to do now?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 3: And the people who place those curses are no longer
Speaker 3: here with us, and she has to and I sometimes
Speaker 3: don't know she will. I think with my siblings, you know,
Speaker 3: we talked about me and my brother about this a lot.
Speaker 2: In particular, I think my sister does to my sister.
Speaker 2: My sister sometimes my sister sometimes.
Speaker 3: Is like fuck it, ah, the curious girl, I love
Speaker 3: this shit right, you know, like she's like in a
Speaker 3: funny way.
Speaker 2: But I think I think my brother and I are probably.
Speaker 3: The most I think the most like. I don't know
Speaker 3: the most like because I actually I also know that
Speaker 3: like my my brother who's been who is incarcerated for
Speaker 3: thirty years and was returned newly returned last year, I'll
Speaker 3: spend a year ready since he came out.
Speaker 2: That's what.
Speaker 3: Yeah, He's talked a lot about like breaking general breaking general,
Speaker 3: generational curses. I think we have to because, like we
Speaker 3: talked about, like we have to because if we don't,
Speaker 3: we run the risk of like damaging further gnerations of us.
Speaker 2: And we don't want that.
Speaker 3: We know that we're damaged and we don't want to
Speaker 3: participate in the damaging with the people.
Speaker 2: We also know.
Speaker 3: That the curses and traumas are that we inherited from
Speaker 3: our people above us that led them to not have
Speaker 3: good full lives.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and we don't want to have of We don't
Speaker 2: want to have shortened lives now. We don't want to
Speaker 2: have not good lives.
Speaker 3: We're gonna have rich and beautiful and exciting full lives.
Speaker 3: We can only do that if we actively work against
Speaker 3: the curses that we're putting us in that way, you
Speaker 3: put this curses to bed. So I think, you know,
Speaker 3: I think that's how we push the topic of discussion
Speaker 3: is like we being one, how how do you become
Speaker 3: mindful of what was passed down for us?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 3: Like what do our hands hold? You're like, where are
Speaker 3: we obligated to hold? What can we actually just let
Speaker 3: go of? Like there's a there's a duty, there's a
Speaker 3: sense of do your obligation to hold something and what
Speaker 3: can we say this actually is not what.
Speaker 2: My hands aren't made for this. I can put this down,
Speaker 2: and I can.
Speaker 1: My hands a small but then natural.
Speaker 2: I cannot, you know.
Speaker 3: I also think it's important to note right that like
Speaker 3: our take on breaking ger mystial curses are often informed.
Speaker 2: By our own insections of who we are, right.
Speaker 3: And like like like we have a privilege to be
Speaker 3: able to engage in the thought of changing breaking systems
Speaker 3: like not everyone can not the tools to do so.
Speaker 3: Everyone wants to do so, you know, And I guess
Speaker 3: I'm also just said like like in the you know,
Speaker 3: in the in the sphere of like like like wrapping
Speaker 3: this conversation with the boat, like like what is the
Speaker 3: liberation from that trauma? Passion also look like for us,
Speaker 3: like for me, I think a lot about this now
Speaker 3: a conversation with with with my brother age, I'll made
Speaker 3: a conversation about this, like this passage in Jewish texts
Speaker 3: I have read a few times. I'll try and give
Speaker 3: you like like a quick summary.
Speaker 2: There's a part in I want to say, it's not
Speaker 2: in the tour.
Speaker 3: I think it's like in like the like like like
Speaker 3: some some like some of my Jewish text but not
Speaker 3: not like not not like not like the Holy the Holy.
Speaker 2: Text essentially, but I think it's Kamara.
Speaker 3: And so there's some rabbis this Rabbi Johanan, Rabbi Haya
Speaker 3: and Rabbi Hanina and so and so and so Rabbi
Speaker 3: Hi falls ill, and rebbe Hia Yohanan student Rabbi Johanan
Speaker 3: like like checks on Hya and Hyas like, oh I'm sick,
Speaker 3: And Robert Johana is like, is your suffering? Is your
Speaker 3: suffering dear to you? Do you desire to be ill
Speaker 3: or reflicted? And Rabbi Hyah says, I welcome neither the
Speaker 3: suffering nor it's reward. I when he welcomes with suffering
Speaker 3: with love, is rewarded, but like like like we we're
Speaker 3: with more suffering.
Speaker 2: So Rabbi Yohanan says like, give me your hand and
Speaker 2: like and heals him.
Speaker 3: Rabbi Johanan also then falls ill, and Rabbi Hanina visits
Speaker 3: him and I.
Speaker 2: Was like, hey, girl, is your suffering dear to you?
Speaker 3: Johanan says like, I welcome this suffering nor reward And
Speaker 3: then and then raby Hanina Healsohanan, you know someone someone
Speaker 3: something like the questions asked if Rabbi Yohandan, like, why
Speaker 3: didn't you wait to heal?
Speaker 2: Why don't you wait to heal yourself? Yeah, I'm not sorry.
Speaker 2: Why did you write for.
Speaker 3: Hanina when you can feel yourself Youhanan says, a prisoner
Speaker 3: generally cannot free hurt himself from prison, but depends on
Speaker 3: others to release them from the shackles.
Speaker 2: Right the.
Speaker 3: Words and so and so we talk about like with
Speaker 3: like with like liberation from gensional trauma. Impression is when
Speaker 3: like you can't do it by yourself, like like like
Speaker 3: like when you're shackled by oppression, you can't like like
Speaker 3: you actually can't make the change yourself every time, you know,
Speaker 3: I hold that as much as I hold Asasha chorus
Speaker 3: chance of like we have nothing to break but our chains,
Speaker 3: right right, and we have there's nothing to lose with
Speaker 3: our chains, but like losing your chains, sometimes you can't.
Speaker 2: Break for yourself.
Speaker 3: You have to do it with with others. And also
Speaker 3: you have to be willing to let go of suffering
Speaker 3: because right like like that text taught me that pump
Speaker 3: people like suffering a safety. Suffering is comfort right like
Speaker 3: like the suffering is bondage, but there's a comfort and
Speaker 3: bondage because you know what's gonna happen. So much of
Speaker 3: Jewish history and text was the idea of like the
Speaker 3: Jewish will suffer a lot, but they like but like
Speaker 3: when they had to fight for the free the most
Speaker 3: hard and scary because they have no you want.
Speaker 2: To expect the other side of that.
Speaker 3: And so I think also we often refuse to break
Speaker 3: change or break curses or the ol trauma because we're
Speaker 3: scared of who we will become after them, because our
Speaker 3: sense of self right is wrapped up and suffering, and
Speaker 3: so like for us to say I have to relinquish
Speaker 3: who I am and be open to who I'll become
Speaker 3: or who I'm becoming without this trauma, it is scary
Speaker 3: and hard and like gross and sticky. It's it can
Speaker 3: feel crunchy and painful. But I think personally, I think
Speaker 3: right like like like like what a gift is to
Speaker 3: do that, And that's the most apportant thing is to
Speaker 3: say I can change, and I can change with others
Speaker 3: and others can have me change, right like the function
Speaker 3: of freedom is to free others. And if I can't,
Speaker 3: if I if I can't be free. Without you being free,
Speaker 3: then we have to free each other as well too.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I so yes to all of that, and I
Speaker 1: appreciate that, you know, I always appreciate when you bring in,
Speaker 1: you know, whatever Jewish ideologies or concepts and to help
Speaker 1: people kind of expand the ways that they think about this,
Speaker 1: this this idea of freedom, because I think, and I
Speaker 1: will say this, I think there's such an American way
Speaker 1: of thinking about what freedom is and thinking about you know,
Speaker 1: breaking chains or breaking all of it is so rooted
Speaker 1: and a lot of what I like to think of
Speaker 1: is you know, patriarch patriarchy, patriarical ideologies and concepts. Right,
Speaker 1: there is no real essence of the soul in some
Speaker 1: of these conversations, and so I feel like when you
Speaker 1: offer up these concepts are these thoughts, you're really taking
Speaker 1: it to a place of trying to connect it back
Speaker 1: to the person. And I think it's so much more
Speaker 1: than saying freedom is having, you know, having money to
Speaker 1: do this, or freedom is being able to talk about this,
Speaker 1: or freedom is you know, X, Y and Z. It
Speaker 1: really is this idea of thinking about what are the
Speaker 1: things And this is something that I've been trying to
Speaker 1: do so much in a lot of my work. What
Speaker 1: is the thing that I feel like I am. I
Speaker 1: kind of want to go back to your point about
Speaker 1: this idea of people not breaking quote unquote these change
Speaker 1: because they worry about what's on the other side or
Speaker 1: who am I without this? And I think it's kind
Speaker 1: of the ways that some people are are you know,
Speaker 1: I've had to stop and ask people, like you're always worried,
Speaker 1: or you're always stressed, or you're always angry about something,
Speaker 1: like have you ever thought about what your life would
Speaker 1: be like if you were just okay? Like some people
Speaker 1: don't know what it's like to just be okay, Like
Speaker 1: this idea that everything is gonna work out and even
Speaker 1: if it doesn't work out the way I want it
Speaker 1: to work out, it's still gonna work out. Right, What
Speaker 1: does ease look like for you? And what does what
Speaker 1: does breathing that that that you know, whatever we want
Speaker 1: to call it, what does that look like? And I
Speaker 1: think so many of us are so and especially marginalized people,
Speaker 1: we're so caught up in the bad, like everything is
Speaker 1: so bad. And that's what I'm really trying to like
Speaker 1: get people to see now, even in my own organization,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get people to understand like, this is intentional.
Speaker 1: This is exactly the way that you know, elements of
Speaker 1: white supremacy works. It's to keep you locked in fear.
Speaker 1: It's to keep you in this cycle of thinking and
Speaker 1: feeling like emotionally you're gonna always have something bad happen.
Speaker 1: And you pass that down, right, you want to pass
Speaker 1: that down to your nieces, your nephews, your kids, your
Speaker 1: kids kids, to let them know, like you got to
Speaker 1: be worried about the people at the top. And when
Speaker 1: you get free enough to say, I'm worried about y'all,
Speaker 1: I'm scared of y'all, I'm not There is nothing that
Speaker 1: you can really say or do to me that ain't
Speaker 1: already been done that that changes so many things. So
Speaker 1: I just I guess for me, I really like to
Speaker 1: think of liberation as being this kind of thing of
Speaker 1: folks getting to a place of recognizing that, yes, you
Speaker 1: can acknowledge the bad, and you can acknowledge the things
Speaker 1: that have happened throughout your trajectory and your life, but
Speaker 1: that you can also be okay with today. It is
Speaker 1: okay for you to look forward to tomorrow. It is
Speaker 1: okay for you to be okay with the idea that
Speaker 1: it may not work out one hundred percent the way
Speaker 1: you want it to work out, but it will. It's
Speaker 1: going to you. I even think looking at us, we're living.
Speaker 1: I think we're living and telling examples of people who
Speaker 1: you know. I mean, I got a couple more years
Speaker 1: on you. But the reality is like we're living, we're
Speaker 1: living examples of this ship's gonna work out. It's gonna
Speaker 1: be okay, and you don't have to live in worry
Speaker 1: or fear all the time.
Speaker 3: So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's
Speaker 3: God okay, family, that we have given you all a
Speaker 3: blueprint to break in the chains. We got to be
Speaker 3: great for some advertisements. I might need to find me
Speaker 3: an advertisement for some for some hair anti itch because
Speaker 3: oh lord, yeah damn. We be back in just a
Speaker 3: psycho fan.
Speaker 2: With the shack gos on my feet.
Speaker 1: So I just had okay, y'all, I have had so
Speaker 1: many songs come across my head, and like I said this,
Speaker 1: I know it's the neural spiciness in me. But with
Speaker 1: that being said, we are back, y'all, And this conversation
Speaker 1: is a conversation I have been having with myself while
Speaker 1: I've been on the planes and been flying into cities
Speaker 1: and out of cities and doing all this stuff. So
Speaker 1: I just want to say this, and I think this,
Speaker 1: this conversation may get us canceled brunos, who cares, Jordan.
Speaker 1: I feel like, just you travel just as much as
Speaker 1: I do, and I know you know, so so what
Speaker 1: y'all Okay, So I'm gonna just say this. We're gonna
Speaker 1: this segment. We're gonna go ahead and go back to
Speaker 1: our roots, and we're gonna do what's on your plate.
Speaker 1: But what I wanted to do was I wanted to
Speaker 1: lean into this idea that both of us love to
Speaker 1: eat when we are on the road. We like to
Speaker 1: try new things, we like to post new things. And
Speaker 1: I wanted to lean heavily into this idea of what
Speaker 1: what what are some of the things that people have
Speaker 1: said is really good that you were like, yes, they
Speaker 1: are correct, it is fantastic, it is good. Everything I've
Speaker 1: gotten is great. Or what are the things that people
Speaker 1: have been like, Yo, this is really good and you
Speaker 1: should go try this when you're in that city and
Speaker 1: you've been like nah, girl. So I just I wanted
Speaker 1: to have a conversation about in your mind, what have
Speaker 1: the city's with the best and the worst food? Do
Speaker 1: you think it compares the home? Because the thing is,
Speaker 1: we're both from California, and I have some really spicy
Speaker 1: takes on what I believe is the best food in California.
Speaker 1: And also I feel like there are a lot of
Speaker 1: people who are lying about their food in their cities,
Speaker 1: and I just wanted us to talk about it. So
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna tell you what I have, but i
Speaker 1: just want to. I want to see what you're what
Speaker 1: you've got to say, and I want to plus want
Speaker 1: it or I want to I want to put a
Speaker 1: negative next.
Speaker 2: So you said you said expose myself, let me see
Speaker 2: the heat.
Speaker 3: Okay, so let me say cities.
Speaker 2: First of all, we'll say Cleveland, Ohio.
Speaker 3: I will say that there's not like no one ever
Speaker 3: says good to Cleveland for food, Like no one saying
Speaker 3: good food there?
Speaker 2: How did I did I eat? Sure? Was anything amazing?
Speaker 3: No, But like no one said, no one saying Cleve
Speaker 3: when he said but Cleve it was. I was a
Speaker 3: fun city. I enjoyed myself there, but no one that
Speaker 3: I went to was no one knowing that no one
Speaker 3: that no one's ever liked.
Speaker 2: Cleveland's best, blest place for some food. That's a lot.
Speaker 3: When I was in Mexico City, someone said Rosetta, but
Speaker 3: bad for saying it, said Rosetta.
Speaker 2: There's an Italian place in.
Speaker 3: Roman Or someone said it was one of the best
Speaker 3: Italian places right now certified lies.
Speaker 2: Because why because why was our pasta cold? First of all?
Speaker 2: Why cold?
Speaker 3: My my my friend got up sausage boli that she
Speaker 3: was minced to the point where I was a girl
Speaker 3: that looks like sausage dust not dust dust. I got
Speaker 3: this like this, I got this like crab while was
Speaker 3: the crab not in the ravelly, but just.
Speaker 2: On top of it, was just on top of the rabbit.
Speaker 3: It was just it was not it was not nothing
Speaker 3: was giving and reservation only it's like hardy reservations. We
Speaker 3: luckly to walk in right like when they first opened.
Speaker 3: So they they did an empty table. Girl, I was
Speaker 3: like the the the the the civil lightning was at
Speaker 3: that restaurant.
Speaker 2: I saw got make and I was gone.
Speaker 1: I okay, in the city of all places.
Speaker 3: Gotten performed, Got got performed. That next night, I also
Speaker 3: liked I also lied to God make. I also said,
Speaker 3: I got make, and that when I want to come
Speaker 3: and apologize, it's got to make. If you if you
Speaker 3: hear this, you said, hi, Gorge to me the picture,
Speaker 3: took a picture together, and I told you to your face,
Speaker 3: you chose a great restaurant. I had already eaten and
Speaker 3: I did not like my meal, and I didn't have
Speaker 3: the heart to tell you it was not good.
Speaker 2: Now you had him there as well too.
Speaker 3: I saw you have a little lying. I said, Noah,
Speaker 3: let me just tell you girl.
Speaker 2: You get a great place.
Speaker 3: And I lied to you, M Chris, and I help
Speaker 3: you insert.
Speaker 2: Like sad music. As as I did all that.
Speaker 3: I had, I had to come forward in confession. I'll
Speaker 3: do ten him Mary's exactly. So I would say that
Speaker 3: in New York, I'll say best. Someone said I have
Speaker 3: to try tie dinner in in like near Little Lily neighborhood.
Speaker 3: And I can confirm my ship was ten fire certifi busting.
Speaker 1: Well, you were staying in one of the best areas
Speaker 1: of New I was, and I was there. I have
Speaker 1: been there. Shout out to Bernadette who took me to
Speaker 1: that area when I was there in New York.
Speaker 3: And I'll tell you, yes, some of the talent people
Speaker 3: to tell me to try was not busting.
Speaker 2: I was like, no, what I've had better. I've had
Speaker 2: a better Italian flud in San Diego.
Speaker 3: And that, and that was as I was like, yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, not not all the best in some of
Speaker 3: the pizzas. Man, maybe you're not, so can I can
Speaker 3: I step there for seconds?
Speaker 2: I definitely want to say this.
Speaker 1: I you know, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna leave
Speaker 1: you out there to get all of the heat. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say that I don't believe. Oh, my friends in
Speaker 1: Chicago are going to be so mad at me for
Speaker 1: saying this. Everything I had in Chicago was awful. Everything
Speaker 1: I don't and I and and and people kept saying, oh,
Speaker 1: here go here. I've been to Chicago twice and the
Speaker 1: food just wasn't as good as people purport it to be.
Speaker 1: It's just not and I I I don't, I don't,
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. But I'm just like,
Speaker 1: and maybe that's because that's their thing. Like it's kind
Speaker 1: of the way we go up for California and we say, oh,
Speaker 1: this thing in California is so good, and people come
Speaker 1: to California like absolutely it's not. Maybe it's the same thing, right,
Speaker 1: Maybe it's the we you know, we gas up our city.
Speaker 1: But I just Chicago, absolutely not New Orleans. Go ahead.
Speaker 2: Someone told me, someone told me, now, not too much
Speaker 2: on my city.
Speaker 3: Now go ahead, one of the best. Oh oh, now
Speaker 3: your city. Not too much on my city. Sometime the
Speaker 3: best gumbo was gonna be this place, like like near
Speaker 3: downtown was not the best.
Speaker 2: The best gumboy I have was was.
Speaker 3: I lick of Stone off okay Lico Stone in the
Speaker 3: French Quarter.
Speaker 2: The best poe boy and the best gumbo of my life.
Speaker 1: I want to shout out, I am in So we're
Speaker 1: recording right now. By the time you hear this, i'll
Speaker 1: be home, but I will say I am in New Orleans.
Speaker 1: And they never fail. There's this place called Mambo, and
Speaker 1: like I literally, when I get off of this, I'm
Speaker 1: probably gonna order from them again because their food is
Speaker 1: just so good, and it is so consistently good from
Speaker 1: top to bottom. Everything I've had from there both The
Speaker 1: last time I was here, I was here for Essence
Speaker 1: Vest last year, and I was here this year. Obviously
Speaker 1: this year's the last few days ago. I was here
Speaker 1: for a Bookstop, Mambo's fantastic. I've yet to try Loretta's.
Speaker 1: I know people keep telling me Therettas is one of
Speaker 1: the best places in New Orleans to go. Lorettas was
Speaker 1: not open today, and so I'm really sad because I'm
Speaker 1: not going to get another It's another time that I
Speaker 1: didn't get a chance.
Speaker 2: To try it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I definitely want to say like New Orleans,
Speaker 1: by far, I have yet to have anything here that
Speaker 1: has made me go I never want to eat there again,
Speaker 1: like everything that I've had here, and I usually only
Speaker 1: eat mom and Pop when I'm here because I genuinely believe,
Speaker 1: like why am I gonna come here and eat something
Speaker 1: that I could get back in California? But they Yeah,
Speaker 1: I hear you. Not everything is made with the same love.
Speaker 1: But I will tell you right now, mostly everything I've
Speaker 1: had here is good. Chicago not so much. I will
Speaker 1: also say Texas. Nothing that I've had in Texas has
Speaker 1: been good. Sorry about it. I don't care. San Antonio nasty,
Speaker 1: Houston nasty, Dallas nasty. I don't want it. I don't
Speaker 1: think it's good. I'm sorry, y'all. I just don't even
Speaker 1: the barbecue. The barbecue was like Mexican food maybe, but nah, girl,
Speaker 1: it's not given. What I'll say is given. Sorry, sorry girl.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, I'm trying to think of Oh I will
Speaker 1: say this so I don't And if Quasm or if
Speaker 1: Heather listens to this episode, I want them to ping me.
Speaker 1: There was a pizza place that was in San Francisco
Speaker 1: that I had and it's probably the best pizza that
Speaker 1: I've ever had in my life, because baby, I don't know,
Speaker 1: I don't remember the name of it. I do remember
Speaker 1: it was by that park though, you know that park
Speaker 1: where everybody name I'm gonna go.
Speaker 2: In San Francisco, Dolores Park.
Speaker 1: I think so, yeah, I think it is. And there's
Speaker 1: that whole street. It's really busy. There's a pizza place
Speaker 1: right on the corner. It is so my god, it
Speaker 1: is the best pizza I have ever had in my life.
Speaker 1: And I've been to And I'll also want to say this.
Speaker 1: You know what, France, you ain't gonna get out of
Speaker 1: this one games either, because I went to France. Y'all
Speaker 1: tried to tell me that the food in Paris was
Speaker 1: good and it's not. Nothing that I had in Paris
Speaker 1: was good except for that burger I had. That burger
Speaker 1: was the only thing I had that was good while
Speaker 1: I was there. I'm just saying it wasn't good, So
Speaker 1: sorry about it.
Speaker 3: You heard it here first, folks, Yeah, you heard it
Speaker 3: here that everywhere, all these food places that these people be.
Speaker 1: Said good, it's not as good as they try to
Speaker 1: tell you. So I will say this. If you want
Speaker 1: to prove me wrong, buy me a ticket to Chicago
Speaker 1: and give me a list of food with some money,
Speaker 1: and I will eat. I will will do, we will.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna even say us. Give us somebody, somebody
Speaker 1: give us some money so we could go do a
Speaker 1: tour through Chicago, find all the good places to actually eat.
Speaker 1: Got like a guys, guys, you know the dives and drives.
Speaker 3: We'll give us here on the Patreon girl, did you yes?
Speaker 1: Girl, subscribers only and the sponsor us, Yes, God, yes,
Speaker 1: all right. Oh so I guess it's me taking us
Speaker 1: to commercial. Okay, all right, No, it's fine, all right.
Speaker 1: So now that we now that we now that we
Speaker 1: have officially lost some listeners, we're gonna take a quick
Speaker 1: break to pay these sponsors so we don't lose the
Speaker 1: entire show, and we get back. We are gonna be
Speaker 1: here with y'all's favorite segment, Yes ma'am, No, Man, Pam
Speaker 1: will be back in a way, all right, y'all. So
Speaker 1: we are at the part of the show our yes
Speaker 1: maam and I know man. For those who are new
Speaker 1: to the show, we are basically this is where we
Speaker 1: talk about the things that we love and that we're celebrating.
Speaker 1: Are the things that we absolutely can't stand, are the
Speaker 1: things that we wish we'll just ultimately die and go away.
Speaker 1: And so this week my yes man, so I know,
Speaker 1: Man Pam's are very light considering that the world is
Speaker 1: on fire, and it's like, why should I add to
Speaker 1: it this week? I wanted to say so. I had
Speaker 1: mentioned I wanted to mention this a couple of weeks ago,
Speaker 1: and I totally forgot because I think we got into
Speaker 1: a whole bunch of other conversations and it was something.
Speaker 1: But I definitely want to say shout out to the
Speaker 1: people in Huntington Beach who ultimately were able to get
Speaker 1: I think there were two different measures. I did my googles,
Speaker 1: I researched. There were two different measures, and basically one
Speaker 1: of the measures was one to make sure that city
Speaker 1: officials or government officials had no dictation over what books
Speaker 1: could be put in the libraries in that city. And
Speaker 1: then another one was to make sure that the librarians
Speaker 1: would keep the power that they had while they were
Speaker 1: in like the people who worked for the libraries, the
Speaker 1: librarians would be able to keep the power. There were
Speaker 1: two different measures and they both passed, and so basically
Speaker 1: what that being said, Basically, the people of Huntington Beach said,
Speaker 1: we want our government off of our like city things
Speaker 1: like we want librarians, we want the people, we want
Speaker 1: the community to be able to decide the things that
Speaker 1: they think are best for them. And I just want
Speaker 1: to say, I think that is absolutely fantastic to see
Speaker 1: a city that is very very very very very red
Speaker 1: and conservative starting to kind of look around and be like, actually,
Speaker 1: I think a lot of this stuff is not as
Speaker 1: bad as y'all are saying it is. And for those
Speaker 1: of you who don't know the whole, a lot of
Speaker 1: it's not even just Huntington Beach. It's a lot of
Speaker 1: these cities. They are trying to say that books that
Speaker 1: are inclusive, books like mine, books like George M. Johnson's,
Speaker 1: what they're trying to do is they're trying to label
Speaker 1: it as porn because it's talking about identity and gender expression.
Speaker 1: And so I think folks are starting to wake up
Speaker 1: and they're starting to realize that a lot of the
Speaker 1: stuff that they're seeing and folks, what folks are doing,
Speaker 1: are coming from a very, very very Christian nationalist ideology.
Speaker 1: So kudos to them, my no man, Pam. You know,
Speaker 1: I genuinely have so many things that are on my mind.
Speaker 1: I could talk about our government, I can talk about
Speaker 1: just a lot of the stuff that I'm seeing in
Speaker 1: terms of how people talk and treat one another. But
Speaker 1: I think I'm just gonna go ahead and go back
Speaker 1: to something that has really been irking me being considering
Speaker 1: that I've been living out of a hotel for maybe
Speaker 1: the last month and a half, and I think I've
Speaker 1: said this before, and I'm just gonna say it again,
Speaker 1: because you know, it bears repeating. It's called door dash,
Speaker 1: it is called uber eats, it is called I'm paying
Speaker 1: a five ninety nine fee and a six dollar seven dollars,
Speaker 1: eight dollars sometimes nine or ten dollars tip. I don't
Speaker 1: want to meet you downstairs. I don't I don't. I don't,
Speaker 1: and and I understand some hotels won't let you up.
Speaker 1: So I want to say this, I don't want to
Speaker 1: meet you at your car. I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want to come out to your car. Leave
Speaker 1: it in the lobby. If I have to come down,
Speaker 1: I'll come down. But I don't. I don't want to
Speaker 1: meet you in the lobby for my food. I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want to do that. Don't call me and
Speaker 1: tell me, oh, I'm outside, come get your food. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no no door dash you you find somewhere to park,
Speaker 1: put on your flashes, put my food where it needs
Speaker 1: to be. I will come down and get it or
Speaker 1: come to my door.
Speaker 2: But I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not.
Speaker 3: I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that with you. Sorry, baby, sorry about it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's where I'm at. What about you?
Speaker 3: My yes, ma'am so sleep But also true, like the
Speaker 3: button says leave up my door, that means at my.
Speaker 1: Door, at at my door.
Speaker 4: Period, at my door, my yes, ma'am, pam. Honestly, I
Speaker 4: just it's just gonna be a doochi right now, like
Speaker 4: no pharticular reason.
Speaker 2: I just love doch.
Speaker 3: I think I'm sure done to dos you before too
Speaker 3: wants to do it again because I just I just
Speaker 3: I asked your music often.
Speaker 2: But I was just like hearing those bleeds again, Like
Speaker 2: I put on repeat like.
Speaker 3: Five times, and I was just like, this is just
Speaker 3: such a fucking bob like like it's just like genius beautiful, amazing,
Speaker 3: so dope, so like like lyrically lyrically blessed, melodically blessed
Speaker 3: like so it looks amazing, just like black as hell,
Speaker 3: like dough g yes game to you.
Speaker 2: You ever hear this, please come on the show. We'd
Speaker 2: love to have you.
Speaker 3: You're amazing nose bleeds to once today, Boombat once a day,
Speaker 3: you're looking fruitcake once a day, Black Memoir once a day,
Speaker 3: Like I just love doughhe so much. And no man,
Speaker 3: Pam is okay, so when you say to home, for
Speaker 3: there's a three mile droger to get home, and no one,
Speaker 3: I'm real, no one can just like y'all can't.
Speaker 2: Drive in these streets.
Speaker 3: Like I just no man to drivers because if you know,
Speaker 3: if you have to cross the intersection and you know
Speaker 3: that there's no chance in how that your car will
Speaker 3: make here across the intersection, just stay at the light.
Speaker 3: Don't go in intersection because now I can't leave my
Speaker 3: light because you blocked.
Speaker 1: Me, because you blocked you in and now.
Speaker 2: You're stuck, and I'm pissed.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people are also if you see the bitch is
Speaker 3: like is stuck, don't honk, then you know they're stuck.
Speaker 2: Girl, you honk and won't move them. You honking at
Speaker 2: me behind you won't help you out the girl, I.
Speaker 3: Can't go forward because we're stuck. You think I'm gonna
Speaker 3: be showing you down.
Speaker 2: I don't. I too have places to go. Leave me alone.
Speaker 2: If you if you see an.
Speaker 5: Ambulance or police coming, pull it a side, don't keep
Speaker 5: it fast, don't.
Speaker 3: And then and you and and and when when much
Speaker 3: are placed to leave, let's let the person assemble back
Speaker 3: into the line, because now you have a call that's
Speaker 3: criss crossed between the two lanes and they can't go either.
Speaker 2: And guess what a bitch? You stiff again?
Speaker 3: So I just you know who took your hard drive,
Speaker 3: who taught your traffic laws? And why do you do this?
Speaker 3: Everyone deserves driving rights. Let me give me a license.
Speaker 3: You're done, You're done.
Speaker 1: Not the drive is right? Oh yeah, you're wrong.
Speaker 2: It's not wrong.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and shout out, just yeah, shout out to the
Speaker 1: people who who who get it. There. Girls, I'll see
Speaker 1: driving and I'm like, you get it, you get it, girl,
Speaker 1: you get it, get hit it. But they're girls who
Speaker 1: act like they're the only people on the road and
Speaker 1: the acting showing a whole ass, honey, And I just
Speaker 1: be so tired. So I'm right there with you, right
Speaker 1: there with you anyway. We are at the we are
Speaker 1: at the end of our show. Please send us your thoughts,
Speaker 1: your feet back, your emails to Blackfatfempod at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: You can also send us your thoughts via email, I mean,
Speaker 1: or via social media. Not via email, woo lord, I'm tired.
Speaker 1: You can send us your thoughts via social media by
Speaker 1: interacting with our post on Instagram and Twitter by using
Speaker 1: the hand of Blackfatfempod. We are on Instagram, we are
Speaker 1: on Threads, we are on Blue Sky. We are on
Speaker 1: the tick of the Talks. You can watch us anywhere
Speaker 1: and everywhere, So yes, please find us, leave us a message,
Speaker 1: leave us a comment. We would definitely love to engage
Speaker 1: in Queen Jojo. Where can the dolls find you?
Speaker 3: My sweet babes, You can find me at Joe Hoodanel's
Speaker 3: across all socials, my websitet journ jails dot com. If
Speaker 3: not that, you'll find me hoax smashing every vehicle it's
Speaker 3: in the middle of inter section.
Speaker 2: I'll make sure that I'm.
Speaker 3: Make sure that the dog, but I will hope smashing
Speaker 3: thro the car somewhere else in a dumpster connect.
Speaker 1: Am I love that?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: I love that so much. Yes, babies, you've got to
Speaker 1: we've got to drive a little bit more careful than
Speaker 1: what we've been doing. Ask with me. You can find
Speaker 1: me and details about my the last up, the last
Speaker 1: tail end of this book stop and too our honey,
Speaker 1: my God. You can find all of that down to
Speaker 1: ww dot Doctor John Paul dot com. You can also
Speaker 1: find me on socials using at doctor John Paul. I
Speaker 1: have one more bookstop after this this episode drops, have
Speaker 1: one more bookstop in Minneapolis. I will be in Uh.
Speaker 1: I will be in conversation over I think it's major
Speaker 1: and Quinn. I think that's how you pronounce it major
Speaker 1: and Quinn. So if you want to check us out,
Speaker 1: head over that way. It'll be me and Chris Stepman
Speaker 1: who are having a conversation and so if you know
Speaker 1: Chris Uh, they're great people. They've been very supportive of
Speaker 1: me and my journey, and I'm very happy to be
Speaker 1: in convo with them. But yeah, that's pretty much it,
Speaker 1: and yeah, thank you for everybody who has shown up.
Speaker 1: You can check out my episode of Very Delta that
Speaker 1: came out last week. Head over to YouTube to watch that,
Speaker 1: or you can listen to it over on Moms of Moguls.
Speaker 1: It's a very very very very great episode. We talk
Speaker 1: a lot about donuts and we talk about diabetes, so
Speaker 1: that that was fun. And then also you can check
Speaker 1: out if you haven't had a chance to check out
Speaker 1: my episode on what is It thick Boy? Well, yeah
Speaker 1: that too, thick Boy. That episode came out last week.
Speaker 1: Came out last week as well, So thick Boy is
Speaker 1: another great conversation. We talk about the book and then
Speaker 1: we also It's Our America who We Are Meant to
Speaker 1: Be is also on HULUCI you can go check that out.
Speaker 1: But other than that, a bitch has been work king,
Speaker 1: and so yeah, all of the things. With that being said,
Speaker 1: we want to thank our producer Ba Wang for handling
Speaker 1: all of the logistics and everything that comes with keeping
Speaker 1: this podcast, moving and shaking and grooving on Iheart's Network.
Speaker 1: Thank you, thank you, thank you, babies. We love you
Speaker 1: to death. We'd also like to shout out our wonderful editor,
Speaker 1: Chris Rogers, because without him we would have no audio
Speaker 1: or visuals. Far down to the tubes of you. This
Speaker 1: has been another one. Stay black, fat, femine, fabulous, and
Speaker 1: remember what joho ween.
Speaker 2: We may not be your cup of tea. And if
Speaker 2: you aren't girl, then suffer.
Speaker 1: Tea period period. That's it. We ain't gonna even don't
Speaker 1: even get no water.
Speaker 2: Just suffer.
Speaker 1: Suffer you, Tommy Teddy said the kiddy. But the milk
Speaker 1: is still good. I love us for real. I'll see
Speaker 1: you next week. Bye.