1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:04,040 Speaker 1: Fred's Show is on Fred's Biggest Stories of the Day. 2 00:00:04,120 --> 00:00:06,040 Speaker 2: If someone texted it, we should look up bed parties 3 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:10,280 Speaker 2: for college. It's madness. Oh I'm assuming they tuned in 4 00:00:10,320 --> 00:00:12,560 Speaker 2: a little late. But that's how that all started with 5 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 2: bed parties for college. The pyrotechnics are wild. That's got 6 00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:21,520 Speaker 2: to be a fire hazard, that pyrotechnics. Bed parties, you 7 00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:23,279 Speaker 2: know what all started with, Like, Oh my gosh, honey, 8 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:24,760 Speaker 2: you got into college and it was like a pillow 9 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:28,200 Speaker 2: on the bed, exciting, you know, and then and now 10 00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 2: it's who knows, It's like a new house. You get 11 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:32,120 Speaker 2: a new house for the bed in it, and it's, oh, 12 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:37,080 Speaker 2: you're going to Alabama, congratulations, you know, the biggest. 13 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:37,279 Speaker 3: Stories of the day. 14 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 2: Ticketmaster has ruled out it's new all in pricing initiative, 15 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 2: and that means that you'll now see the full ticket 16 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 2: price upfront, including all the pesky service fees before you 17 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,080 Speaker 2: hit the checkout, but no more surprises at the end. 18 00:00:49,479 --> 00:00:52,000 Speaker 2: This change comes change comes in response to the Federal 19 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 2: Trade Commissions new regulations banning hidden junk fees, aiming to 20 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 2: make pricing more transparent across various industries. While this movie 21 00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:03,360 Speaker 2: is forward, it's worth, noting that local Texas and delivery 22 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:07,240 Speaker 2: fees will still appear at checkouts. So it's like all 23 00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:08,760 Speaker 2: the tickets tw hundred bucks, and he clicked it's like 24 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:10,480 Speaker 2: seven hundred. Like wait, where did all this come from? 25 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:14,480 Speaker 2: It's like how hotels that have become advertised it. You know, 26 00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:15,880 Speaker 2: I don't want to two hundred bucks a night or 27 00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:17,520 Speaker 2: whatever it is, and then you're like, oh, okay, cool, 28 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:18,720 Speaker 2: and then by the time you check out, it's eight 29 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,520 Speaker 2: hundred bucks. I didn't go to the gym. Do I 30 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:22,200 Speaker 2: look like somebody who went to the gym while I 31 00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:25,840 Speaker 2: was here? Like I stuffed my face the entire time. 32 00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:29,360 Speaker 2: You guys know that I've been skeptical. I'm not currently 33 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:32,480 Speaker 2: medically licensed. We're going to get it back, but you 34 00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:34,800 Speaker 2: know that I've been skeptical of of OZEMPK and these 35 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,600 Speaker 2: weight loss drugs that people are taking it. And look, 36 00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:38,960 Speaker 2: if you need it for whatever health reason, and your 37 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:40,640 Speaker 2: doctor says you should have it, then you should have it. 38 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:43,319 Speaker 2: What do I know? Don't take medical advice from me. 39 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:45,480 Speaker 2: But for some people that are taking it because it 40 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 2: helps them lose weight, and maybe they have other means 41 00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:49,560 Speaker 2: that they could lose weight, they just don't want to 42 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:52,000 Speaker 2: do it. I'm still convinced, like, are you sure you 43 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:54,600 Speaker 2: want to do that? Because you might grow a tail. 44 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 2: And it turns out there are now side effects that 45 00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:58,920 Speaker 2: people are talking about, lots of them. A new side 46 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:02,640 Speaker 2: effect is done ohmic mouth. It's making the rounds, especially 47 00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 2: among some celebrities. This condition involves rapid facial fat loss, 48 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 2: leading to sagging skin and pronounced wrinkles around the mouth, 49 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:13,640 Speaker 2: giving an unexpectedly aged appearance. 50 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:15,320 Speaker 3: And then there's thosempic tongue. 51 00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:15,720 Speaker 4: Well. 52 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:19,760 Speaker 2: Doctor's now warning about how your taste in food could 53 00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:23,000 Speaker 2: also dramatically shift. It's not just about feeling less hungry. 54 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,440 Speaker 2: New York based obesity specialist doctor Daniel Rosen has seen 55 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:29,560 Speaker 2: avid meat eaters go off of steak, sausages and other 56 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:32,280 Speaker 2: favorite cuts because they report a metallic taste. 57 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:33,680 Speaker 3: So you might lose weight. 58 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:35,560 Speaker 2: But you've got to be aware about all the potential 59 00:02:35,560 --> 00:02:38,280 Speaker 2: side effects and then consult with a healthcare professional before 60 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:40,480 Speaker 2: starting any kind of new medication. 61 00:02:40,840 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 5: Okay, I still don't see the issue as far. I 62 00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 5: don't well think about it. Okay, if that medication can. 63 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:49,760 Speaker 6: Help me not eat steak sausages and I don't know 64 00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:52,560 Speaker 6: pastries I'm okay with it. And the Olympic face thing, yeah, 65 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,520 Speaker 6: it probably sucks because you look like, you know, eighty 66 00:02:54,560 --> 00:02:57,280 Speaker 6: when you're what forty? But I would rather have that 67 00:02:57,320 --> 00:03:00,679 Speaker 6: somebody with a very large face with my cheeks. I 68 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:03,240 Speaker 6: would so much rather someone be like, wow, look at 69 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:03,600 Speaker 6: that face. 70 00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:04,520 Speaker 3: If you need the. 71 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:06,480 Speaker 2: Medicine, and this is the side effect, and this is 72 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:07,960 Speaker 2: just the way that you're going to be healthier, and 73 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,120 Speaker 2: this is the way you're gonna lose weight. I mean, 74 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:11,160 Speaker 2: there are a lot of examples and amazing, but if 75 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:13,480 Speaker 2: you don't need it, then why would you want things 76 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:16,200 Speaker 2: to start tasting bad? And why do they taste bad? 77 00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:18,639 Speaker 2: Like what is going on inside of me that? You 78 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:19,200 Speaker 2: know what I mean? 79 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:19,600 Speaker 7: Yeah? 80 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,560 Speaker 2: How much to eat fewer sausages, you know, but they 81 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:24,480 Speaker 2: still taste good when I would like to have a sausage. 82 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:26,799 Speaker 5: That's what I'm saying. That's tempting the sausage. 83 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:30,600 Speaker 3: Well, I don't know. I'm skeptical. I'm skeptic. 84 00:03:30,639 --> 00:03:33,080 Speaker 2: I'm skeptical, and I for no reason, but I'm skeptical 85 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 2: of anything that seems too easy. When it seems too easy, 86 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:38,320 Speaker 2: I'm like, now hold on a minute, yeah again, don't 87 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:39,920 Speaker 2: ap me I'm not talking about the people who need 88 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,440 Speaker 2: it for health reasons. I'm talking about the people who 89 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:43,960 Speaker 2: need it for vanity reasons. The vanity thing correct. The 90 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 2: you Go, once considered the worst car in history, is 91 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:49,640 Speaker 2: making a comeback. A German professor now leads the Yugo 92 00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:52,680 Speaker 2: brand and plans to revive it where they drift up 93 00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:54,760 Speaker 2: a prototype by twenty twenty seven. So if it's the 94 00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,800 Speaker 2: worst car ever, why we're bringing it back. It was 95 00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:59,320 Speaker 2: made in Yugoslavia, It died out nearly two years ago, 96 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:01,640 Speaker 2: and it was considered one of the worst cards due 97 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:05,760 Speaker 2: to its poor build quality, reliability issues, and questionable safety standards. 98 00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 3: They promise that the. 99 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:10,920 Speaker 2: Subcompact hatchback will be true to the band, the brand's 100 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:14,119 Speaker 2: budget minded buyer, So we can have a you Go. Now, 101 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:17,520 Speaker 2: what would you say is the optimal number of beers 102 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,200 Speaker 2: to drink in one sitting? 103 00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 3: Because this story has been on every website this morning. 104 00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:22,480 Speaker 2: I didn't eve think I was going to do it 105 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:24,800 Speaker 2: until I saw it for the fourth time, and someone's 106 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 2: taking it upon themselves to figure out the optimal number 107 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,560 Speaker 2: of beers. I would think that this would vary depending 108 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:32,240 Speaker 2: on size and the kind of beer. You're drinking and 109 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 2: all kinds of different stuff. But the perfect number of 110 00:04:34,760 --> 00:04:36,480 Speaker 2: beers in one. 111 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 5: Sitting optimal being just for the best feeling. 112 00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess so, just best all around experience, like 113 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:46,920 Speaker 2: four five three, oh, this guy says three. According to 114 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,960 Speaker 2: a recent article from a website called mass Live, the 115 00:04:50,960 --> 00:04:54,520 Speaker 2: beer Nut, the sweet spot is three beers. This trio 116 00:04:54,600 --> 00:04:56,600 Speaker 2: allows you to savor the flavors and enjoy the buzz 117 00:04:56,640 --> 00:05:00,600 Speaker 2: and keep things in moderation. The piece emphasizes, while beer 118 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,440 Speaker 2: is a delightful companion, it's best enjoyed responsibly. 119 00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:05,279 Speaker 5: Well, I order a beer in a shot. 120 00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:05,960 Speaker 3: That's good to know. 121 00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:09,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, well, that would seed up the process. Yeah. And 122 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:12,240 Speaker 2: a delivery driver from Amazon was fired after she was 123 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:16,000 Speaker 2: caught on video pooping on a customer's porch in Los Angeles. 124 00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:18,520 Speaker 3: When you gotta go, you gotta go. I wonder this 125 00:05:18,600 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 3: all the time. 126 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:22,200 Speaker 2: If you're an Amazon driver or a Doordasce driver, if 127 00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:24,800 Speaker 2: you have a second eight five five five three five, 128 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:26,000 Speaker 2: where do you go to the bathroom? 129 00:05:26,520 --> 00:05:27,320 Speaker 3: Do you go home? 130 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,560 Speaker 2: Or do if you find yourself far away from the house, 131 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:32,200 Speaker 2: do you go to like a I don't know, fast 132 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,240 Speaker 2: food restaurant or something? And do you order something and 133 00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:35,760 Speaker 2: use it or did you just go in and use it? 134 00:05:35,839 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 2: Jason company. When you were doordass driver, Jason, I thought 135 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,400 Speaker 2: Bello was back. Why do you have to come and. 136 00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:45,760 Speaker 3: Go there are issues? Are you serious again? What are 137 00:05:45,760 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 3: the issues? Why are there issues? There's issues every day? 138 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:54,080 Speaker 2: Stop with the issues. Would you go to the bathroom 139 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:55,360 Speaker 2: when you were a door dess driver. 140 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:57,560 Speaker 1: I would s up at like gas stations or the 141 00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:59,359 Speaker 1: restaurants that I was picking up from, Like if I 142 00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:01,080 Speaker 1: had a couple minutes to wait for the food, I 143 00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:01,600 Speaker 1: would go there. 144 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:05,279 Speaker 2: And they never gave you any trouble about it. No, No, 145 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:07,560 Speaker 2: because I mean, I guess somebody was buying something. It 146 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:08,080 Speaker 2: wasn't you. 147 00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:09,200 Speaker 3: But yeah. 148 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,560 Speaker 2: A delivery driver for Amazon was fired after she was 149 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:14,360 Speaker 2: caught on video pooping on a customer's portion in Los Angeles. Now, 150 00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:16,400 Speaker 2: we could have picked the spot a little better, right, 151 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:20,320 Speaker 2: because it was right on their front doorstep. A driver 152 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:23,120 Speaker 2: was seen on security cameras pulling up her pants while 153 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:25,560 Speaker 2: the bowel movement was left behind on the bottom of 154 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:28,440 Speaker 2: a set of outdoor stairs. A neighbor also checked their 155 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:32,560 Speaker 2: security camera caught the same driver urinating inside a wooden gate. 156 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:36,400 Speaker 2: I mean, this person had some issues. Amazon unofficials said 157 00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 2: that the incident happened on Sunday. The driver was fired 158 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:41,400 Speaker 2: immediately after they were given the footage. It's not known 159 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 2: that the driver will face any charges. So we got 160 00:06:44,120 --> 00:06:46,719 Speaker 2: to remember, everyone's got cameras everywhere. Now, they got the 161 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:49,279 Speaker 2: cameras in their floodlights, they got the cameras at the door, 162 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:51,000 Speaker 2: they got cameras everywhere. 163 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,880 Speaker 3: So we got to pick a better spot. 164 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:55,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think Amazon's probably harder because like, you're 165 00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:58,160 Speaker 1: not going into businesses, You're just going home to home 166 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:00,719 Speaker 1: to home to home. But still, like you have to 167 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,239 Speaker 1: pass somewhere that has a bathroom, right at some point 168 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:03,960 Speaker 1: during going to a. 169 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,039 Speaker 3: Gas station, go into a fest food restaurant, you would. 170 00:07:05,839 --> 00:07:07,839 Speaker 5: Think and at least pick it up. Don't leave it 171 00:07:07,839 --> 00:07:08,480 Speaker 5: on my door. 172 00:07:08,400 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 3: Snow, Like, come on, man, that's true. Get a doggy bay. 173 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:16,840 Speaker 2: I mean, ay, if it was an emergency or whatever, 174 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:18,760 Speaker 2: like hose it off something, I would have. 175 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:21,560 Speaker 8: Took one of the boxes. You know, I'll drop off 176 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:23,000 Speaker 8: your snacks and open up the ball. 177 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,680 Speaker 1: Just leave an unboxed snacks Like, I guess that's better. 178 00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:29,440 Speaker 3: I'd rather have unboxed snacks than a pile of me, 179 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:32,400 Speaker 3: but like, why were you peeing on one person's yard? 180 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,600 Speaker 2: And then I mean, like, oh wait, hold on, this 181 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:36,560 Speaker 2: is going to develop into something a little more. I mean, 182 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:39,760 Speaker 2: what is going on? Like if you're not sure, you know, 183 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 2: maybe I don't know. It's actual apple pie Day today, 184 00:07:44,280 --> 00:07:47,120 Speaker 2: which that's super appetizing. The Entertainer Report is next, will 185 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,240 Speaker 2: do blogs after that? Stay or Go? Debate some relationship drama, 186 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:53,400 Speaker 2: paying bills and eight hundred bucks in the showdown. All 187 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:56,960 Speaker 2: coming up, Fred Show Freads show is on. It's Stay 188 00:07:57,160 --> 00:08:00,520 Speaker 2: or Go. It's gone too far, Bella, It's gone too far. 189 00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:08,160 Speaker 2: We obtained an actual photograph of bellahamine our intern who 190 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:10,040 Speaker 2: if you missed it a few minutes ago. She believes 191 00:08:10,040 --> 00:08:11,960 Speaker 2: that she should be honored as the first daughter of 192 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,440 Speaker 2: her hometown in California because her dad is the part 193 00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:18,360 Speaker 2: time mayor. And if you go to our instagram Fred 194 00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:20,560 Speaker 2: Show Radio, you're gonna see that this is an image 195 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:25,160 Speaker 2: that she posted herself. This is unbelievable. She had a 196 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 2: full on photo shoot and everything. The haters are going 197 00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:30,960 Speaker 2: to say it's photoshop because of the hands, but she 198 00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:32,200 Speaker 2: has manley hands. 199 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:38,000 Speaker 3: She has manly hand and shoulders and she's part black, 200 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,520 Speaker 3: which a lot of people didn't know. I didn't know 201 00:08:41,559 --> 00:08:42,040 Speaker 3: that about it. 202 00:08:42,720 --> 00:08:45,560 Speaker 2: But man talk about taking his shine away from her dad, 203 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:49,720 Speaker 2: who's doing the hard work. This is crazy, this image 204 00:08:49,760 --> 00:08:51,760 Speaker 2: Fred Show radio. It was like last week werew on 205 00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:56,520 Speaker 2: this esteemed panel for this international radio conference. They flew 206 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:58,760 Speaker 2: us to Toronto. We're on this panel, and this dude 207 00:08:58,800 --> 00:09:01,520 Speaker 2: has been listening. We said, more than a dude, he's 208 00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:05,720 Speaker 2: a big he too, is an esteemed European radio manager. 209 00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 3: Yeah right, big, big time guy. 210 00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:09,959 Speaker 2: And apparently he'd been listening to our show for weeks 211 00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,760 Speaker 2: and like picking out moments and then use it for 212 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:14,960 Speaker 2: this this slideshow kind of presentation thing and question and 213 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,000 Speaker 2: answer in front of all these radio people from all 214 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 2: over the world. And one of the images he found 215 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:23,800 Speaker 2: was of Keiki's cord and Kiki has three hands. In 216 00:09:23,840 --> 00:09:28,760 Speaker 2: the image, she has three hands and one's white or 217 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:31,960 Speaker 2: two might be white. I'm not even sure. But okay, 218 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:35,440 Speaker 2: here we are. You know, it's like, miss you should know. 219 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 2: You know, if you came, you're thinking you were gonna 220 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:39,600 Speaker 2: get secrets. The secret is we don't have any money 221 00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:40,960 Speaker 2: for a graphic designer. 222 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:44,079 Speaker 3: That's the secret. We don't have to say something, we 223 00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:45,319 Speaker 3: can we do what we. 224 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,720 Speaker 8: Can photographers, none of the videographers. 225 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:49,120 Speaker 3: But I had to just say it. 226 00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 2: I had to say just I had to get it 227 00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:52,880 Speaker 2: out of the way and say, guys, we're aware that 228 00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:56,679 Speaker 2: Kiki has three hands in this that's that's what we're 229 00:09:56,679 --> 00:10:02,960 Speaker 2: working with in the United States. Guys, Hey, Amanda, good morning. 230 00:10:03,559 --> 00:10:05,720 Speaker 2: Well hi Aman, welcome to the show. Welcome to Stay 231 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,480 Speaker 2: or Go. We appreciate your note. What's going on with 232 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:09,560 Speaker 2: this boyfriend of yours? 233 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:09,920 Speaker 3: Is his name? 234 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:11,480 Speaker 2: Well, what I'm gonna say his name? But he's been 235 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 2: around for six months? This boyfriend, Yes, yeah. 236 00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:21,320 Speaker 9: We've been dating for about six months. And you know, 237 00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:26,240 Speaker 9: as a disclaimer, he's not a heavy drinker like whatsoever. 238 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:29,600 Speaker 9: But you know, he does like to go out over 239 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:32,640 Speaker 9: the weekend on his days off, and he does usually 240 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:35,680 Speaker 9: getting he gets really drunk. 241 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:42,760 Speaker 2: Okay, so what okay, So the guy, this guy even dating, 242 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,320 Speaker 2: he doesn't drink, like so what is like not during 243 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:46,800 Speaker 2: the week he doesn't drink, but then when he goes 244 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:47,600 Speaker 2: out he beings drinks. 245 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:48,280 Speaker 3: Is that the story? 246 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 10: Yeah? 247 00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:53,520 Speaker 9: I mean, well, the thing is that he just turns 248 00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:57,439 Speaker 9: into a different person when he starts drinking and he's 249 00:10:57,520 --> 00:11:01,960 Speaker 9: you know, he really is such a kind and considerate boyfriend, 250 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:05,000 Speaker 9: but you know, on the weekends when he drinks, he's 251 00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:09,040 Speaker 9: just not as sweet and he starts like picking fights 252 00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:12,280 Speaker 9: with me and even like just people around in the bar. 253 00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:17,160 Speaker 9: It's just really weird. Like he gets like overly protective, 254 00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:21,160 Speaker 9: Like he like he thinks that guys are flirting with 255 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:21,840 Speaker 9: me when they're not. 256 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:26,040 Speaker 2: He's a tough guy, what he's drinking. 257 00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:29,600 Speaker 9: I mean, that's the thing is, like I know him 258 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:33,600 Speaker 9: as this big softy, but you know there are times 259 00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:36,120 Speaker 9: like where he's even like left me at the bar 260 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 9: and he's gone home like without me, without telling me, 261 00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:43,880 Speaker 9: and it seems like he's he found a reason to 262 00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:47,200 Speaker 9: be like really mad. I don't know, but the whole 263 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:50,680 Speaker 9: thing is that he doesn't even remember leaving me, you know, 264 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:54,120 Speaker 9: Like I did talk to him about it. It's just 265 00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:57,520 Speaker 9: that he explained that he I don't know if this 266 00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:00,319 Speaker 9: is an excuse or not, but he said but that 267 00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:03,960 Speaker 9: he probably did that because he knows his limits and 268 00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:05,040 Speaker 9: he was getting too drunk. 269 00:12:05,160 --> 00:12:07,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's you know, you would say that. I mean, 270 00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:09,199 Speaker 3: you're you're his partner. 271 00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:12,160 Speaker 2: So if that were the case, and I realized when 272 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:14,360 Speaker 2: you're drinking, you're not necessarily in your right mind. But 273 00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:16,280 Speaker 2: that's something you would say to your partner. You wouldn't 274 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,959 Speaker 2: leave your partner somewhere. I mean, that's something. I'm the 275 00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:21,079 Speaker 2: king of the iris exit when I have met a 276 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:22,959 Speaker 2: little bit too much or whatever, when it's time, I 277 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:25,800 Speaker 2: usually to sneak out, but I don't have anybody with me. 278 00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:27,320 Speaker 3: I don't leave anybody where we were. 279 00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:30,320 Speaker 9: You can't do that, right, Like, at least let me 280 00:12:30,440 --> 00:12:33,079 Speaker 9: know that you know, you need to go home or something, 281 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:35,560 Speaker 9: because I know he would be so madified did that 282 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:39,800 Speaker 9: to him, you know, But like I said, I mean, 283 00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:44,040 Speaker 9: he he it's not just about like checking off boxes. 284 00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:47,240 Speaker 9: But he really is such a great boyfriend outside of 285 00:12:47,360 --> 00:12:52,480 Speaker 9: when he drinks. He's like it seems like he's perfect 286 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:55,080 Speaker 9: for me other than that, and I don't know, it's 287 00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:59,360 Speaker 9: just it's not like I would say he's class right 288 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:03,080 Speaker 9: having a huge drinking problem because he only drinks like 289 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:04,440 Speaker 9: once or twice a weekend. 290 00:13:05,559 --> 00:13:09,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, but if he's drinking and again not an alcohol 291 00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:13,800 Speaker 2: substance abuse counselor, but if he's drinking to that level 292 00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,839 Speaker 2: once or twice a week, that's still a problem. I mean, 293 00:13:17,040 --> 00:13:20,040 Speaker 2: the problem isn't necessarily And again, someone who's welcome to 294 00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:21,920 Speaker 2: call and correct me on this eight five five, five 295 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,200 Speaker 2: nine one oh three five. 296 00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:24,559 Speaker 3: I don't think it's the frequency. 297 00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:26,679 Speaker 2: I don't think it's if you drink every day or 298 00:13:26,720 --> 00:13:29,600 Speaker 2: if you just get hammered twice a week. It sounds 299 00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:32,319 Speaker 2: like he may have a problem with alcohol. And I 300 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:34,320 Speaker 2: think the question is, I mean, have you have you 301 00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:37,040 Speaker 2: said to him? And again, I don't know that I'm 302 00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 2: qualified to give this advice, but I'm going to try. 303 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:40,560 Speaker 2: I mean, have you said you have you had this 304 00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:42,959 Speaker 2: conversation with him? Hey, I'm concerned about your drinking. I'm 305 00:13:42,960 --> 00:13:46,480 Speaker 2: concerned about your behavior when you drink. I mean, have 306 00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:50,160 Speaker 2: you have you had like a like a kind sort 307 00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:51,920 Speaker 2: of constructive conversation about that. 308 00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:53,760 Speaker 7: I have I've had. 309 00:13:54,080 --> 00:13:58,600 Speaker 9: I would say, yeah, like a few very light conversations 310 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:03,360 Speaker 9: around it. And I think, you know, he gets a 311 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:06,480 Speaker 9: little bit defensive, like I'm attacking him for all like 312 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:09,440 Speaker 9: the good things that he does do for me, And 313 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:12,920 Speaker 9: so I don't think he really like understands how it 314 00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 9: affects me and like other people, because he doesn't remember, 315 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:22,520 Speaker 9: you know. So yeah, it's kind of like tricky. 316 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:25,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, I hate to say this, but my gut tells 317 00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,960 Speaker 2: me you got to go. My gut tells me that 318 00:14:28,040 --> 00:14:31,400 Speaker 2: it's it's you're early in this relationship. It's going to 319 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 2: be a difficult thing. It's going to be a difficult thing 320 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:37,600 Speaker 2: to to mitigate. I don't know if it's your job 321 00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:39,880 Speaker 2: to save this guy. You know, he gets to I 322 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,480 Speaker 2: mean you, I think you can tell him, you know, 323 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:44,720 Speaker 2: in a caring, loving way. Hey, this this concerns me. 324 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:48,080 Speaker 2: I care about you. I like you, you know, but 325 00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 2: you don't seem to be acknowledging what is a serious 326 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,000 Speaker 2: problem here. And someone texted that Ben's drinking is a 327 00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:56,800 Speaker 2: form of alcoholism. I mean, I think again, it's I 328 00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:58,720 Speaker 2: don't think you have to get hammered every day to 329 00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:01,440 Speaker 2: be to have a problem. I think you can get 330 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:06,520 Speaker 2: If you're getting hammered consistently in any frequency, that's probably 331 00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:10,360 Speaker 2: an issue, especially if he's doing it to to sort 332 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,600 Speaker 2: of mask other issues, insecurities or whatever. 333 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:13,440 Speaker 3: I don't know. 334 00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:16,040 Speaker 2: I mean, this could be something you deal with the 335 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:20,320 Speaker 2: entire length of your relationship. This may never go away. 336 00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:25,320 Speaker 9: Yeah, that would really think, because I really like him 337 00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:28,320 Speaker 9: so much and I really care for him, So it's 338 00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:33,400 Speaker 9: it's really hard to end it just like that, you know. 339 00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,520 Speaker 9: But yeah, I totally hear what you're saying. 340 00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:38,440 Speaker 2: I've dealt with this a little bit in my life, 341 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,240 Speaker 2: and all I can tell you is that this is 342 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 2: a decision that the person using the substance. 343 00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:46,120 Speaker 3: They have to make that decision. 344 00:15:46,440 --> 00:15:49,960 Speaker 2: Like, you can beg him, you can, you can, you know, ultimatums, 345 00:15:49,960 --> 00:15:52,920 Speaker 2: you can do all this different stuff, But ultimately, I 346 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,040 Speaker 2: think it's just going to cause a divide. I feel 347 00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,800 Speaker 2: like if you're saying to him, look, I really care 348 00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:59,040 Speaker 2: about you and you are a lot of things that 349 00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:01,480 Speaker 2: I want, but this he is a problem. And in 350 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:03,720 Speaker 2: order for this relationship to continue, you're going to need 351 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,760 Speaker 2: to manage this somehow. And he's telling you all I 352 00:16:06,760 --> 00:16:08,960 Speaker 2: don't know, or he's used it making excuse you why 353 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,880 Speaker 2: to remember? Okay, well, then don't drink as much you might, 354 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:14,520 Speaker 2: you know what I mean? I think the only real 355 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:18,480 Speaker 2: option here is for him to stop drinking or manage 356 00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:20,520 Speaker 2: the drinking, or get some help or do something if 357 00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:22,640 Speaker 2: he wants to save the relationship. If he's not willing 358 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:25,200 Speaker 2: to do any of that, then I don't know that 359 00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:27,880 Speaker 2: this changes, right, I. 360 00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:29,840 Speaker 9: Mean, what do you think if you know, he says, 361 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:33,640 Speaker 9: you know, change doesn't happen overnight, like you have to 362 00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:37,280 Speaker 9: just like trust me with it, like let me, you know, 363 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:39,960 Speaker 9: take care of it. And then it kind of it's 364 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,160 Speaker 9: like a ball, it seems like a ball. Then is 365 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:45,160 Speaker 9: in my court to like let him deal with it 366 00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:50,320 Speaker 9: and try not to like micromanage these actions. 367 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:54,760 Speaker 3: When you bring it up. 368 00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:56,760 Speaker 8: If he's getting defensive when you bring it up, it 369 00:16:56,760 --> 00:17:00,760 Speaker 8: doesn't even sound like he's really acknowledging that there's an issue. 370 00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:04,400 Speaker 9: Yeah, I feel like he I feel like he knows 371 00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:07,639 Speaker 9: he I think he's like it feels vulnerable. 372 00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:10,639 Speaker 2: Okay, But again, I mean this this is going to 373 00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 2: affect your life too. And so if he's serious about 374 00:17:13,520 --> 00:17:16,879 Speaker 2: this relationship and it's and it really is becoming a problem, 375 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:19,720 Speaker 2: whether it's the way he acts, it's about the way 376 00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:22,119 Speaker 2: he treats you or leaving you places of it about 377 00:17:22,119 --> 00:17:25,879 Speaker 2: your safety. You know, again, I think you're in you 378 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,760 Speaker 2: have You have every right to communicate your concern. You 379 00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:31,359 Speaker 2: have every right to wish of him that he changes 380 00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:33,920 Speaker 2: his behavior. You can offer him help, you can offer 381 00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,720 Speaker 2: him support. But I mean, if he's not going to 382 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:37,560 Speaker 2: do any of that and deny it I don't know, 383 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,600 Speaker 2: he may not be as perfect as you think. And 384 00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:41,800 Speaker 2: I'm again I'm not I'm not advocating you just dump 385 00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:43,720 Speaker 2: the guy and leave him. But I mean, if you 386 00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:47,280 Speaker 2: express your care and you express your concern, ultimately he 387 00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,680 Speaker 2: has to make the decision. If he's telling you he 388 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:50,800 Speaker 2: doesn't have a problem, that's I think that says a lot. 389 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:54,800 Speaker 9: Yep, yeah, no, you have a point there, especially with 390 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,520 Speaker 9: like leaving me and stuff, It's like becomes more of 391 00:17:57,560 --> 00:18:00,120 Speaker 9: a safety issue. 392 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:04,800 Speaker 2: I mean, the text is blowing up, it's overwhelmingly You've 393 00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:07,679 Speaker 2: got to go run a lot of people, you know, 394 00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:12,240 Speaker 2: sharing their personal experience. I mean, it's hundreds of texts already. Unfortunately, 395 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:13,920 Speaker 2: this is something that I think affects a lot of people. 396 00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:15,560 Speaker 2: But let me take some phone calls. Maybe there are 397 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,720 Speaker 2: some people more qualify, anyone's more qualified than me to 398 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,600 Speaker 2: be giving you advice on this, because again, this is 399 00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:22,800 Speaker 2: not something to play with. You know, this is a 400 00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:25,919 Speaker 2: this could be a disease, this could be you know, 401 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:28,280 Speaker 2: a dependency that he needs real help with. And I 402 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:30,879 Speaker 2: don't I don't want to say anything that you know 403 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:32,960 Speaker 2: I shouldn't say because I'm certainly not an expert. But 404 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:34,919 Speaker 2: let me take some calls and and see people have 405 00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:36,399 Speaker 2: to say and keep the radio one and man, I 406 00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:38,000 Speaker 2: wish you the best. Thank you for sharing that with us. 407 00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:41,919 Speaker 2: Good luck, yeah, yeah, eight five five five N one 408 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:44,000 Speaker 2: one oh three five. Nick, you're a you're a mental 409 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,160 Speaker 2: health therapist. 410 00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:46,960 Speaker 11: I am, I am. 411 00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:48,280 Speaker 12: How's everybody doing today? 412 00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:50,520 Speaker 2: Good morning? So you hear this story, well, what what 413 00:18:50,640 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 2: comes to mind? 414 00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:54,000 Speaker 11: What comes to mind is. 415 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:58,960 Speaker 10: Not immediately like leaves. Obviously he is like struggling, and 416 00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,159 Speaker 10: what he's struggle with is impacting their relationship, and he 417 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:07,879 Speaker 10: clearly needs some form of therapy to address these concerns. 418 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:11,360 Speaker 10: Because Fred, I agree with you, it's not necessarily. 419 00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:14,399 Speaker 11: About a frequency. It's also about like how much you're 420 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:18,919 Speaker 11: drinking in that two day period that he's getting blackout drunk. 421 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,480 Speaker 11: That could qualify as like a potential binge eating or 422 00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:27,359 Speaker 11: binge drinking disorder, and that definitely needs to be addressed. 423 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,080 Speaker 11: So I think maybe putting the relationship on like a 424 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:33,640 Speaker 11: probation and saying, hey, if within this six month time 425 00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:37,480 Speaker 11: period you don't seek help or make any changes, and 426 00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:40,600 Speaker 11: we don't communicate what you're doing to make these changes, 427 00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,800 Speaker 11: then I can't be with you anymore, this has become unsafe. 428 00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:46,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, man, good advice. Thank you Nick, thanks for listening. 429 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,520 Speaker 9: Have a good day anytime you guys to love you. 430 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:50,359 Speaker 3: Yeah, I love you too. 431 00:19:50,359 --> 00:19:52,520 Speaker 2: I mean, it's said, you don't want to leave someone 432 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:55,000 Speaker 2: who care about, who you think has all these qualities, right, 433 00:19:55,119 --> 00:19:55,679 Speaker 2: we don't want. 434 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:56,120 Speaker 3: To just leave them. 435 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,320 Speaker 2: But again, if I know anything about this, and sadly 436 00:19:59,359 --> 00:20:02,320 Speaker 2: it's in my fami and it's been part of my life. Unfortunately, 437 00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:05,520 Speaker 2: it's the kind of thing where the person having the 438 00:20:05,640 --> 00:20:08,000 Speaker 2: issue and I don't mean to I don't mean to 439 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,920 Speaker 2: isolate that person, but that person, in my experience, has 440 00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:13,000 Speaker 2: to make the decision that they want that for their 441 00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:17,040 Speaker 2: life and that people that they matter and that the 442 00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 2: people around them matter enough. But like again, you can threaten, 443 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:23,120 Speaker 2: you might threaten your whole relationship. Yep, I'm gonna leave 444 00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:26,040 Speaker 2: you if well, guess what If you don't leave, then 445 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:29,040 Speaker 2: then then your threats don't mean anything anymore. Oh yeah, 446 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 2: you know, ultimatums aren't going to work. And if you're 447 00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:33,920 Speaker 2: going to leave, then leave, you know what I mean? 448 00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:37,040 Speaker 2: And you can offer so much support, but then if 449 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,440 Speaker 2: they don't want to take the support, this could be 450 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:43,040 Speaker 2: an issue. For a very long time. Hey Bianca, Yeah, Hi, Hi, 451 00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:45,359 Speaker 2: good morning. So this resonates with you, this story. 452 00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:49,119 Speaker 7: Oh, yes, I've been in a seventeen year relationship. I 453 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:54,040 Speaker 7: have a child, blended family. He's a great guy. I mean, 454 00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,280 Speaker 7: don't get mean, he's a family guy. But seventeen years 455 00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:02,560 Speaker 7: weekend drinker doesn't get better. Definitely need some kind of 456 00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:07,160 Speaker 7: therapy there. You know, it's just it's a hard situation. 457 00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:11,280 Speaker 7: You're six months and you know you have your whole 458 00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:14,560 Speaker 7: life ahead of you. It's sometimes it's not worth it. 459 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:17,000 Speaker 7: Now it's gotten better through the years, but you don't 460 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:20,320 Speaker 7: want to wait seventeen years for it to get better, 461 00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:24,120 Speaker 7: you know what I mean. Like he's like he has 462 00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:27,119 Speaker 7: really calmed down through the years, but you know it 463 00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:31,119 Speaker 7: was hardy, nothing but heartache and heartbreak and coming and 464 00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 7: going into the house, and then when you have children, 465 00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:36,080 Speaker 7: it just makes it even worse because it's just like 466 00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:39,960 Speaker 7: you just feel stuck. And I'm a product of a divorce, 467 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,440 Speaker 7: you know, divorce parents, and you know I've been through 468 00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:47,239 Speaker 7: relationships and whatnot, and it's just it's a hard you 469 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:50,000 Speaker 7: want to make up. I say, Oh, he's a teddy bear, 470 00:21:50,119 --> 00:21:53,760 Speaker 7: He's this He's a family guy. He does great things, 471 00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:58,080 Speaker 7: very successful, very this, very that. But it's you know, 472 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:02,640 Speaker 7: you're willing to spend the rest of your time with 473 00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:06,280 Speaker 7: somebody who just constantly drinks on the weekend. It's it's 474 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,520 Speaker 7: never going to change, and they're never going to change, 475 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:12,159 Speaker 7: and you know there's deeper issues there. There's deeper, deeper 476 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:13,400 Speaker 7: issues there, Beyonca. 477 00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,280 Speaker 2: You what you're saying resonates with me a little bit. 478 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:17,720 Speaker 2: And I think probably other people in the room who 479 00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:19,720 Speaker 2: are the product of a divorced family, because because I 480 00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:24,000 Speaker 2: know Caitlin Is, I am Paulina was. It's like, I 481 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:26,480 Speaker 2: think if I were married and I had kids, I 482 00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,159 Speaker 2: can tell you that I would and I think in 483 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,680 Speaker 2: some ways it maybe is preventive of me getting into 484 00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:34,760 Speaker 2: a serious relationship. I don't want to be to someone 485 00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,320 Speaker 2: else what my parents were to each other at that time, 486 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:38,280 Speaker 2: you know, I mean, like, I don't want to. I 487 00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,479 Speaker 2: don't want I don't want to be in a situation 488 00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:41,800 Speaker 2: where I get divorced. I don't want to be in 489 00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,879 Speaker 2: a situation where I have kids and I break up 490 00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:46,240 Speaker 2: the family or the family is broken up by my 491 00:22:46,320 --> 00:22:48,720 Speaker 2: actions are someone else's, And so I think I would 492 00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:52,679 Speaker 2: be inclined to stick with things and behaviors and mannerisms 493 00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:55,120 Speaker 2: that are unhealthy, and I think this is a trap 494 00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:56,600 Speaker 2: that a lot of people fall into, where it's like, wow, 495 00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:57,800 Speaker 2: I don't want to break up for the kids, I 496 00:22:57,800 --> 00:23:01,160 Speaker 2: don't want to divorcely, but it's like, hey, how long 497 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:02,080 Speaker 2: can you live like that? 498 00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 9: You know? 499 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:04,920 Speaker 7: Yeah, it's very hard. 500 00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:05,159 Speaker 9: You know. 501 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:07,760 Speaker 7: I cheer her in my own head here and there. 502 00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:10,520 Speaker 7: It's kind of like, but I stuck around this long? Yeah, 503 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:11,760 Speaker 7: why am I going to leave now? 504 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:12,320 Speaker 9: You know? 505 00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,320 Speaker 7: But I mean, like I said, through the years, that 506 00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:16,720 Speaker 7: has gotten a lot better. But you know, you do 507 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:19,399 Speaker 7: suffer through I suffer through a lot of years in 508 00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:22,360 Speaker 7: between where I'm like, hey, you know, what the heck 509 00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:25,640 Speaker 7: am I doing? You know, like this is not right 510 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:28,040 Speaker 7: and it's not and it's not fair if you're bringing 511 00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:31,080 Speaker 7: you know, other little people into the world and they 512 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:31,720 Speaker 7: see that. 513 00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:34,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you know, well they see that mom or 514 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,640 Speaker 2: dad isn't happy, and I know you think you're doing 515 00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:39,720 Speaker 2: the right thing, but sadly, you know, this stuff does permeate. 516 00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:42,639 Speaker 2: And look, I thank you for sharing. Very brave of you, Bianca, 517 00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:45,200 Speaker 2: and I appreciate you calling and for offering your perspective. 518 00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,600 Speaker 3: Have a good morning, thank you too. Yeah. Sadly this 519 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,240 Speaker 3: is I mean a lot of these calls are the same. 520 00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:53,600 Speaker 2: It's almost universally go yeah, so yeah, Molly, Hi. 521 00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:56,120 Speaker 3: Good morning. Hi. How are you hey? 522 00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:58,199 Speaker 2: You say good? Thanks for calling for listening. So just 523 00:23:58,200 --> 00:23:59,399 Speaker 2: said recap and stair go. 524 00:23:59,480 --> 00:23:59,600 Speaker 10: Here. 525 00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:01,879 Speaker 2: This woman and she's been with the guy for six months. 526 00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:04,840 Speaker 2: She thinks he's perfect in every way except and these 527 00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:06,840 Speaker 2: are my words, but he binge drinks on the weekend, 528 00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,600 Speaker 2: and he gets combative, not with her, but with other people. 529 00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:13,240 Speaker 2: He leaves her places, doesn't communicate well when he's reached 530 00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:16,280 Speaker 2: his limits, and you know, she's wondering, is this something 531 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:19,240 Speaker 2: that I need to overlook or that I can overlook? 532 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:22,400 Speaker 2: And I mean overwhelmingly people are saying no. 533 00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:27,960 Speaker 12: Right, she absolutely needs to go. So my reasoning is 534 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,400 Speaker 12: that since they've only been together for six months, if 535 00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:33,720 Speaker 12: the relationship does get any longer, and let's say they 536 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:37,640 Speaker 12: have kids, or they get married, or something happens at 537 00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:40,600 Speaker 12: his job and then there's more stressors or his life, 538 00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:43,880 Speaker 12: he might start drinking more and with the if he's 539 00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:46,840 Speaker 12: already being mister macho man at the bar, like he's 540 00:24:47,040 --> 00:24:49,760 Speaker 12: probably going to be physically abusive towards her and she 541 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,560 Speaker 12: definitely does not need that in her life. 542 00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:55,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I hate that she feels that he's perfect 543 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:57,520 Speaker 2: in every way except for this. And I don't know 544 00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,320 Speaker 2: the guy, but that's a big this, you know what 545 00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:02,480 Speaker 2: I mean. He's perfect in every way except he's a 546 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:05,880 Speaker 2: binge drinker and he and it seems like it's somebody 547 00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:08,280 Speaker 2: that he wants to deny and and doesn't. Isn't going 548 00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,639 Speaker 2: to be able to adjust easily that that Unfortunately, that 549 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,040 Speaker 2: means you might deserve more. 550 00:25:13,119 --> 00:25:14,840 Speaker 3: He might not be as perfect as you think. 551 00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:16,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, oh that's a big issue. 552 00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:18,560 Speaker 8: And then if you bring children into the mix, A 553 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:20,119 Speaker 8: lot of people are saying, you know, they stay for 554 00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:22,040 Speaker 8: the kids. The worst thing you can do is say 555 00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:23,680 Speaker 8: these situations for your kids. 556 00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:24,080 Speaker 3: I agree. 557 00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:26,359 Speaker 8: The kids are traumatized because they're scared of dad on 558 00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:26,800 Speaker 8: the weekend. 559 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree, I agree. 560 00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 2: You know, it's a it's as serious and it's a 561 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:34,520 Speaker 2: sad situation, but you know, six months might be it 562 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:36,720 Speaker 2: might be more than enough to know that this is 563 00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:39,760 Speaker 2: what you're up against and it's sad. Thank you, Mollie, 564 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:41,000 Speaker 2: thanks for calling, have a good day. 565 00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:42,640 Speaker 12: Thanks Love you guys. 566 00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:44,639 Speaker 2: I love you too. I only got time for one more. Sophia, 567 00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,240 Speaker 2: you're a therapist as well. Good morning. 568 00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:50,600 Speaker 4: Hi. Yes, I'm so glad that I got through because 569 00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:53,439 Speaker 4: I'm never a caller in for the radio, but I 570 00:25:53,520 --> 00:25:56,439 Speaker 4: felt like I needed to because I actually have I 571 00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 4: am a therapist. But I also have firsthand experience within 572 00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:04,520 Speaker 4: my family of this happening where my brother in law 573 00:26:04,680 --> 00:26:10,000 Speaker 4: became somebody that was a drinker and unfortunately he took 574 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:13,160 Speaker 4: it out on my sister and he became physically abusive 575 00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:17,680 Speaker 4: and it is very sad situation. One night he drank 576 00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:21,080 Speaker 4: too much, he became abusive, and she almost died because 577 00:26:21,119 --> 00:26:25,280 Speaker 4: of the situation. So this is just like in my gut, 578 00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:27,919 Speaker 4: like you need to go, Like there is no waiting 579 00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:30,040 Speaker 4: for them to get help. You're you're so new in 580 00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:33,480 Speaker 4: the relationship, you're going to find another guy that texts 581 00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:36,600 Speaker 4: every box and there is no this that you have 582 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:37,840 Speaker 4: to kind. 583 00:26:37,640 --> 00:26:38,240 Speaker 9: Of roll out. 584 00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:42,959 Speaker 4: But it's just it's the beginning signs of abuse. If 585 00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,920 Speaker 4: he's already doing it in public, just when he's get home, 586 00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:48,679 Speaker 4: it's going to become even worse because there's no audience. 587 00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:50,720 Speaker 4: She needs to go. 588 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:54,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Sophia, thank you have a good day. Thank 589 00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:57,119 Speaker 2: you for calling. I hate to say them, and in 590 00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,240 Speaker 2: my personal experience too, I think sometimes people need to 591 00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:01,720 Speaker 2: hit rock bottom. They sometimes they need to either stand 592 00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,520 Speaker 2: to lose or lose everything absolutely before they can come 593 00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,879 Speaker 2: to the Sadly, some people that that's not enough either. 594 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:08,760 Speaker 2: But you know, again, the threats aren't going to do 595 00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:11,720 Speaker 2: anything unless you actually follow through with it. And the 596 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:13,960 Speaker 2: truth is if if he feels for you what you 597 00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:16,640 Speaker 2: feel for him, then maybe he looks in the mirror 598 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:18,359 Speaker 2: and says, this is a change I need to make 599 00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:20,280 Speaker 2: if I want to be with this person. And if 600 00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:22,440 Speaker 2: he doesn't make that change, I think that you then 601 00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 2: learned in six months what you didn't need to take 602 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:25,880 Speaker 2: ten years to learn. 603 00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:26,120 Speaker 9: Right. 604 00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:27,520 Speaker 3: Absolutely, Yes, he. 605 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:29,680 Speaker 5: Has to want something more than he wants to drink. 606 00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:31,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, it sounds like it. 607 00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:34,879 Speaker 2: And thanks for the actual professionals for calling, because I 608 00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:36,800 Speaker 2: mean it's unfortunately we've all lived many of us in 609 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:39,000 Speaker 2: this room have lived there. Yes, but at the same time, 610 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:43,520 Speaker 2: I don't claim to you know, know exactly the path 611 00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:43,880 Speaker 2: to take. 612 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:46,520 Speaker 3: But all right, we'll get back to smut. 613 00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,240 Speaker 2: The Entertainer Report is up next and eight hundred bucks 614 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:53,520 Speaker 2: show Bizkiki in the showdown thirty and four is uh, 615 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,159 Speaker 2: how do you say love Rena Junior? How do you 616 00:27:56,160 --> 00:28:02,359 Speaker 2: say junior? Levanade Jugnor. Because Shelley is Lavena, we'll go 617 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:04,240 Speaker 2: with that show. I think he just called her a hoe, 618 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 2: But anyway, it's like, we'll play next. Fred show is 619 00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:08,119 Speaker 2: a