1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:04,520 Speaker 1: Two hopeless das one dating app then dares you guys 2 00:00:04,559 --> 00:00:05,240 Speaker 1: swipe right. 3 00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:07,440 Speaker 2: The question is. 4 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:09,720 Speaker 3: Whose love life is more tragic? 5 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:13,960 Speaker 4: It's Battle Love the Tender Dates. 6 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:16,479 Speaker 2: It is the dating game show who's selling signs with 7 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:20,960 Speaker 2: the more attainable life motto? Live, Laugh, lower your standards. Yes, 8 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:23,880 Speaker 2: it's Battle of the Tender Dates, where two of our 9 00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:25,880 Speaker 2: listeners square off to find out whose love life is 10 00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:29,200 Speaker 2: the most tragic. We'll explain the rules in just a second. First, 11 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:33,640 Speaker 2: let's meet today's contestants. In this corner, she teaches a 12 00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:37,279 Speaker 2: fitness class at the local senior home, showing elders how 13 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:41,320 Speaker 2: to use their walking canes like stripper polls. Yeah, let's 14 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:43,600 Speaker 2: give it up for Granny Annie. 15 00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:47,160 Speaker 5: Doing the lord's work. 16 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 3: Out there anything, thank you. 17 00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:51,440 Speaker 4: You're welcome, Well, thank you for what you're doing. 18 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:53,360 Speaker 5: Do we tip you now or later? 19 00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:55,080 Speaker 4: We'll probably do it after this is over. 20 00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:58,400 Speaker 2: And in the other corner on dates, she likes to 21 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:03,080 Speaker 2: play strip poker and intentionally loses the first seventeen hands. 22 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:05,360 Speaker 5: Oh that's a lot of stripping. Heabity. 23 00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:13,120 Speaker 2: She's known as a bad tell the chef. Here's how 24 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:15,240 Speaker 2: the game works. One contestant. We'll start by telling one 25 00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:17,360 Speaker 2: of their worst date stories. The other we'll try and 26 00:01:17,400 --> 00:01:19,520 Speaker 2: come back and counter with the nightmare story of their own. 27 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 2: We're going back and forth for three rounds until we 28 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:24,160 Speaker 2: declare a winner. We're going to start things off with 29 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:25,480 Speaker 2: Granny Annie. 30 00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:26,560 Speaker 4: Let's go. 31 00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:30,480 Speaker 3: So this guy planned a surprise date for me and 32 00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:33,240 Speaker 3: what looks like a normal cafe, but it turned out 33 00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 3: to be a cat cafe. 34 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,520 Speaker 5: So fun. Oh my god, they're so fun. That's a 35 00:01:39,560 --> 00:01:40,199 Speaker 5: great date. 36 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:43,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, well it would be cute, but I'm allergic and 37 00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:44,040 Speaker 3: I thought he knew that. 38 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:49,360 Speaker 5: I mean it's important to check, you know. 39 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:51,000 Speaker 2: Yeah. 40 00:01:51,080 --> 00:01:53,400 Speaker 3: So we're there for about two minutes. I start getting 41 00:01:53,720 --> 00:01:54,400 Speaker 3: seezing and. 42 00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:56,080 Speaker 5: Getting I still win. 43 00:01:56,760 --> 00:02:00,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, really tough out that date found right when you 44 00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,360 Speaker 2: walked in, Like, oh wait a minute, that's everywhere. 45 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:06,600 Speaker 3: Well, he actually admitted that he remembered that I told 46 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,080 Speaker 3: him about the allergy, and then he wanted to see 47 00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:10,280 Speaker 3: if I was lying or not. 48 00:02:10,560 --> 00:02:15,600 Speaker 5: Oh my god, I mean most people are lying about 49 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:17,840 Speaker 5: their cat. 50 00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:21,720 Speaker 4: You're allergic to shellfish? Here eat the shrimp. All right, 51 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,600 Speaker 4: let's go over down the shell can you counter? 52 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:24,360 Speaker 3: Okay? 53 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:26,880 Speaker 1: So I was a dinner with a guy, Yeah, and 54 00:02:26,919 --> 00:02:29,320 Speaker 1: he tells me that I had something stuck in my teeth. 55 00:02:29,919 --> 00:02:32,560 Speaker 5: Embarrassing it was, it was. 56 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,480 Speaker 1: But instead of me handling it on my own, he 57 00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:38,480 Speaker 1: came onto my side at the table and took his finger, 58 00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:41,280 Speaker 1: stuck it in my mouth and tried to get it out. 59 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:43,560 Speaker 4: Oh what a gentleman. 60 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:46,800 Speaker 5: Gross for the kids. 61 00:02:47,440 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 4: What did you say? Thank you? 62 00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:53,400 Speaker 1: Hopefully Gerally did not say thank you. 63 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,440 Speaker 3: I was mortified because then the waiter. 64 00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:57,720 Speaker 1: Came over and asked if everything was okay. It was 65 00:02:57,840 --> 00:02:58,519 Speaker 1: so embarrassing. 66 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 5: Yeah, you're like, no, no, every is wrong. 67 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:02,520 Speaker 1: It's not okay. 68 00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:08,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, that means throwing it back to you, Annie. 69 00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:11,560 Speaker 3: Okay. So this guy invited me to a hockey game 70 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:13,000 Speaker 3: and then he told me he was going to the 71 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:17,200 Speaker 3: bathroom and would be back okay. But next time I know, 72 00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 3: I see him streaking on the ice. Completely new, that's 73 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:22,399 Speaker 3: a fun day. 74 00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:23,880 Speaker 4: This is amazy. 75 00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:25,799 Speaker 5: Did he talk to you about whether or not you'd 76 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:26,480 Speaker 5: bail him out? 77 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:28,840 Speaker 4: You know, by the way, getting onto the ice is 78 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,079 Speaker 4: really hard. What were you thinking when you saw that? 79 00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:33,480 Speaker 3: I didn't know what to say or do. And then 80 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:35,800 Speaker 3: they tackled him, and on the way out, I see 81 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:39,320 Speaker 3: that he had my name chanted on his butt to 82 00:03:39,440 --> 00:03:40,840 Speaker 3: impressed me. I guess. 83 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:44,800 Speaker 5: I just feel like that's a really cold arena to 84 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 5: go naked in. 85 00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:50,080 Speaker 4: When naked, it's gonna be tough to that. 86 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:53,960 Speaker 3: Okay. So I was at drinks for the. 87 00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:57,880 Speaker 1: Guy, yeah, and I was insurance. So he asked me 88 00:03:57,920 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 1: how my day was, and I told him I had 89 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,960 Speaker 1: this customer on the phone who was just time consuming, 90 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:08,520 Speaker 1: rude and you know, incompetent whatever. And I asked him 91 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:11,440 Speaker 1: how his day was, and he said that he had 92 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:15,120 Speaker 1: to deal with this uptight, condescending insurance lady. 93 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:16,680 Speaker 5: Oh no, oh no. 94 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:24,279 Speaker 1: And it turns out that we had already met o. 95 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 4: What are the chances of that? 96 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:28,360 Speaker 5: It sounds like YouTube. 97 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:32,040 Speaker 1: The wrong time? 98 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:33,040 Speaker 5: Yeah. 99 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 2: Okay, our third and final round, which means we need 100 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:38,440 Speaker 2: the best, worst to date stories, lady. 101 00:04:38,520 --> 00:04:39,719 Speaker 4: So Annie, what have you got? 102 00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:43,240 Speaker 3: Okay? So I met up with this guy and in 103 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:47,200 Speaker 3: the first minute, he pulls up my Tinder bio and 104 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:50,680 Speaker 3: asks me, who's the girl in my first two group photos. 105 00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:54,320 Speaker 3: I'm like, why, no, no, and he tells me I 106 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:56,800 Speaker 3: think I knew her from high school. So we get 107 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:59,719 Speaker 3: her on the phone and he starts yelling and calling 108 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:00,520 Speaker 3: her name. 109 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:00,880 Speaker 5: Who. 110 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:04,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, he said he remembered her from the diner last 111 00:05:04,839 --> 00:05:06,720 Speaker 3: week and that she didn't tick him. 112 00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:09,039 Speaker 5: Oh oh wow. 113 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:12,000 Speaker 2: So wait, the only reason that this guy went out 114 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:14,720 Speaker 2: with you was because he recognized the girl from your 115 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:15,719 Speaker 2: Tinder pictures. 116 00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:19,200 Speaker 3: Apparently so because after he cussed through out, he just 117 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:19,839 Speaker 3: walked away. 118 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:23,600 Speaker 5: Whoa, So he was satisfied. 119 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:27,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, someone got something that Michelle. 120 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 4: This is your last chance. 121 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:30,840 Speaker 1: All right. A guy was over at my house. 122 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:31,240 Speaker 3: Yeah. 123 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,480 Speaker 1: I made it clear that I did not want him 124 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:35,800 Speaker 1: to spend the night, right, Okay, So he did leave, 125 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:38,599 Speaker 1: all right. But the next morning, I get up and 126 00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:40,640 Speaker 1: I walk out to my looking room and I seen 127 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:42,680 Speaker 1: him sleeping on my porch. 128 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:45,599 Speaker 5: You sleeping on your porch? Is that what you just said? 129 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:49,720 Speaker 1: Yes, he slept on my porch. So I walk outside 130 00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:53,480 Speaker 1: and I kick him away, and he says he stayed 131 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:55,600 Speaker 1: there just in case I changed my mind. 132 00:05:55,839 --> 00:05:59,719 Speaker 5: Oh oh my god. I thought maybe like he was 133 00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:00,560 Speaker 5: drug hunker. 134 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:06,279 Speaker 1: No, no, not even he texted me at two am, 135 00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:07,520 Speaker 1: staying still here. 136 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:13,279 Speaker 2: Oh man, some guys just won't give up, all right. 137 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,440 Speaker 2: Got the final bell that means the match is over. 138 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:18,320 Speaker 2: We need to score it the lexus? Who do you 139 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:18,680 Speaker 2: give it to? 140 00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: I gotta go, Michelle, for so many reasons but him 141 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:22,400 Speaker 1: putting his finger in your mouth. 142 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:25,040 Speaker 4: Oh my god, you want to vote for Michelle Brooks. 143 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:27,039 Speaker 5: Yeah, I didn't act sleep in his car outside my 144 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:29,760 Speaker 5: house before, so I'm going with Michelle as well. You 145 00:06:29,839 --> 00:06:31,480 Speaker 5: don't need guys out there. 146 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:36,440 Speaker 2: Congratulations bad tell Michelle one of the worst dope life. 147 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:39,560 Speaker 4: So we've heard all my law congratulations. 148 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:42,159 Speaker 5: I thought so. 149 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:48,080 Speaker 2: Congratulations and texted seventy five nine two. If you want 150 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,720 Speaker 2: to up here on the next edition of Battle of 151 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:52,479 Speaker 2: the Tender dates, we got your phone tap coming up next. 152 00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,320 Speaker 5: Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.