1 00:00:01,040 --> 00:00:03,840 Speaker 1: You don't know me our confession. 2 00:00:04,000 --> 00:00:08,119 Speaker 2: I can't take back o arms. 3 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:13,200 Speaker 3: Little Mouse Speak, Texas, seventy five nine two says I've 4 00:00:13,240 --> 00:00:17,200 Speaker 3: always loved the smell of burnt matches to this day. 5 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:19,800 Speaker 3: All by packs of the extra long ones and light 6 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:22,319 Speaker 3: them at random times just to have a good sis. 7 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:26,560 Speaker 2: Okay, such a soul for right, buddy. 8 00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:31,280 Speaker 3: Some people get their comfort from huffing match fumes randomly, okay. 9 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:34,040 Speaker 3: Others get comfort from listening to our show hearing about 10 00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:38,000 Speaker 3: other people in their strange lives. Yes, however you want 11 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 3: to get through the day, you do it that way. 12 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,080 Speaker 3: And one of our listeners wants to come clean and 13 00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:44,560 Speaker 3: maybe make one of our strangers out there feel a 14 00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:47,920 Speaker 3: little better about themselves. She's chosen to go by Jesse today. 15 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:49,360 Speaker 3: So Jesse, welcome to the show. 16 00:00:50,159 --> 00:00:51,120 Speaker 1: Allai, thank you. 17 00:00:51,479 --> 00:00:53,280 Speaker 2: What do you sniff for comfort? Jesse? 18 00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:01,720 Speaker 3: Just some lighted candles for Jesse, I'm sure does the trick. 19 00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,040 Speaker 3: But Jesse, the voice changer is on. You are the 20 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,360 Speaker 3: mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, we want to hear your confession. 21 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:10,039 Speaker 1: Okay. So when I was in college, I was in 22 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:13,920 Speaker 1: like a calm class and there was this guy in 23 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 1: my class who was like just like absurdly good looking, 24 00:01:17,319 --> 00:01:18,240 Speaker 1: just like super cute. 25 00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 3: Right, I did take a lot of com class. I knew, 26 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:26,959 Speaker 3: I recognized. I'm just kidding. 27 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 1: You might not want to claim to be the. 28 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:31,959 Speaker 2: Huge classes where it's like two hundred people. 29 00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,160 Speaker 1: No, I wasn't a huge class. It was like medium 30 00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:35,760 Speaker 1: sized class. 31 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,679 Speaker 3: Okay, we said, I might not want to claim to 32 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:39,040 Speaker 3: be the guy you might not. 33 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:40,440 Speaker 2: I miss that. 34 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:44,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe it was a different good looking guy. 35 00:01:44,040 --> 00:01:46,600 Speaker 1: But so I'm like working all my moves. You know, 36 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:49,160 Speaker 1: I start like trying to sit near him, you like 37 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:51,560 Speaker 1: make little chokes during class. 38 00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 2: Is that girl moves? 39 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:55,520 Speaker 1: Is I never even heard a girl strategized. 40 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:57,880 Speaker 2: You just sit? Yeah, for sure, you have the lecture. 41 00:01:57,920 --> 00:01:59,760 Speaker 1: You can time it when someone gets you. 42 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:02,200 Speaker 2: Got to you got to watch when he walks in, 43 00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 2: so you're walking in at the same time. 44 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,960 Speaker 3: There was a strategy off underneath your shirt in the 45 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:10,360 Speaker 3: middle of class, get. 46 00:02:10,200 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 2: On or like me, just doesn't show up with one. 47 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:12,960 Speaker 1: That's true. 48 00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:14,440 Speaker 3: You know a lot of tricks. 49 00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:16,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, you guys don't know that girls have moved because 50 00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 1: our moves are so smooth. 51 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:21,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, you're just smarter than we are. We don't get it. 52 00:02:21,480 --> 00:02:24,480 Speaker 1: So we like kind of become friends and then we've 53 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:27,760 Speaker 1: got a test coming up, and I'm like perfect. So 54 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:30,800 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, yeah, would you want to study together? 55 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 2: Suddenly he's so smart and you need his help, dumb. 56 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, that sounds great. Yeah, let's hang out, 57 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:44,120 Speaker 1: Like all right, awesome, he's a cab at my place. 58 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:49,120 Speaker 2: Okay, So I'm perfect, dude, I am so excited for 59 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:50,560 Speaker 2: your college self right now. 60 00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:52,400 Speaker 3: You don't even ask how far do you live? 61 00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:53,560 Speaker 2: Just doesn't matter. 62 00:02:53,880 --> 00:02:58,520 Speaker 3: He doesn't plan on studying, so quote unquote study sessh 63 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:00,560 Speaker 3: happening over at his place? How does that go? 64 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 2: So? 65 00:03:01,120 --> 00:03:07,080 Speaker 1: I put on something that looks like accidentally sexy. 66 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:06,680 Speaker 2: Absolutely. 67 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:10,800 Speaker 3: Get into how a girl at this? 68 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:12,600 Speaker 2: You don't want to show up looking like you tried 69 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:14,840 Speaker 2: too hard. You need to show up looking like you 70 00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:16,360 Speaker 2: didn't care, but you really do care. 71 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:17,200 Speaker 3: So how does it go? 72 00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:20,639 Speaker 1: So it's going pretty well. We're like studying. He got 73 00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 1: us a frozen pizza, which like for college is like wow, 74 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:29,480 Speaker 1: you's got ahead, you know. So we're like going over 75 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:32,800 Speaker 1: our notes we're studying, and the oven beeps because. 76 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:33,880 Speaker 2: The pizza is done. 77 00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:38,120 Speaker 1: So he like looks at me and he goes, okay, 78 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:42,040 Speaker 1: this is the worst part. And I'm like, what what? 79 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:44,720 Speaker 1: So I don't know what's happening, but I'm like, all right. 80 00:03:44,760 --> 00:03:47,200 Speaker 1: So he goes into the kitchen. He opens the oven 81 00:03:47,600 --> 00:03:53,840 Speaker 1: and he does not put on ovens. He reaches in 82 00:03:55,600 --> 00:04:00,520 Speaker 1: bare hands. He grabs the pan like the metal hand 83 00:04:03,720 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 1: like screaming. He's like and like goes it onto the counter. 84 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:08,480 Speaker 1: And I'm looking at him. 85 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:11,960 Speaker 2: Like, why is run with you a towel? 86 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:16,440 Speaker 1: Wait? But he's like, I know cooking is the worst. 87 00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:19,440 Speaker 2: His parents failed him. 88 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 3: He didn't know that there was, my God, something invented 89 00:04:23,360 --> 00:04:24,080 Speaker 3: to help him in this. 90 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,200 Speaker 2: Why do I feel like this is something Jeffrey would 91 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:26,520 Speaker 2: have done? 92 00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:32,719 Speaker 3: He's no, I never would have made my own pizza. 93 00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:36,159 Speaker 2: Terrible hands blizzard and. 94 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:38,599 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure his hands are blistered all the time. 95 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:46,400 Speaker 1: I was like, hey, you should use like a towel 96 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:48,800 Speaker 1: or something. He doesn't say that, he's. 97 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:53,400 Speaker 3: He brings up a good point, though, they really should 98 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:56,120 Speaker 3: put that on the box somewhere. If they're stuttying with 99 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:58,719 Speaker 3: this guy, you definitely failed that test. 100 00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,680 Speaker 2: Why do I like this is the worth time he's 101 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,599 Speaker 2: taken that calm, except I. 102 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:05,560 Speaker 1: Think he's one of the people who's so good looking 103 00:05:05,720 --> 00:05:07,960 Speaker 1: that he just like skates through life never having to 104 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:08,679 Speaker 1: learn anything. 105 00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:11,040 Speaker 2: Oh okay, I don't know. 106 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:12,680 Speaker 3: Guys can only get so far with that. 107 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:17,480 Speaker 1: He got to college, burning his hands every time. 108 00:05:19,279 --> 00:05:21,200 Speaker 2: Sure you're both accepted it to the same school. 109 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:26,240 Speaker 3: About your years on his hands filling. 110 00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:26,600 Speaker 1: Out the oplication? 111 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 3: Was it awkward? Every time you saw him? 112 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 2: After that? 113 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:31,240 Speaker 1: He was so awkward. I didn't want to date him 114 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 1: because he's an idiot. You guys still made out. 115 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:37,200 Speaker 2: I mean, it's college. Who didn't date idiots? Then we 116 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:38,039 Speaker 2: didn't kiss. 117 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,159 Speaker 1: Him, No, no, I couldn't. 118 00:05:40,320 --> 00:05:43,200 Speaker 3: Oh it was that bad. 119 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,640 Speaker 2: He's probably putting his hands in her cold water. Imagine 120 00:05:48,279 --> 00:05:53,200 Speaker 2: grab my face with that, with the rawskin blister just 121 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:54,040 Speaker 2: popped on your. 122 00:05:55,560 --> 00:06:00,280 Speaker 1: Okay, So anyway, I'm starting knowing his text. Okay, A 123 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: few weeks later, I hear people whispering about me and 124 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:05,919 Speaker 1: calling me pizza girl. 125 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:09,360 Speaker 2: What calling you pizza about you or something? 126 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:12,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, he spread a rumor that I didn't know how 127 00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:13,880 Speaker 1: to take out hot pizza. I think he was trying 128 00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:19,400 Speaker 1: to like pre am so he put it on me, 129 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,560 Speaker 1: and I couldn't stand up and be like no jack 130 00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 1: guy like, so I just had to be pizza girl. 131 00:06:23,839 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: For the rest of the college. 132 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,240 Speaker 3: So now you're setting the record straight. You are not 133 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:30,120 Speaker 3: pizza girl. 134 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,400 Speaker 1: I am not pizza girl. You went to my school 135 00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:34,279 Speaker 1: and there was a girl and pizza girl with this story. 136 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:35,039 Speaker 1: Just no, it is not. 137 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,799 Speaker 3: Okay. There's always a pizza boy behind the alleged pizza girl. 138 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:43,479 Speaker 3: Well thanks for sharing that with us. Text in seventy 139 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:45,039 Speaker 3: eighty five night too. If you have a confession that 140 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,360 Speaker 3: you've been holding on to, will hide your identity, master 141 00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:49,440 Speaker 3: your voice, and make you the next mass speaker. Your 142 00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 3: phone tasks coming up 143 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:53,040 Speaker 2: Next, Freaking Jeffrey in the morning.