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Speaker 1: For what would you talk about on your on your

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Speaker 1: podcast Phone Presents fifteen minute morning show. You know, people say,

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Speaker 1: how do you plan these things, these fifteen minute morning shows?

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Speaker 1: I tell you we plan these just like we plan

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Speaker 1: our regular show. We don't. There's no plan zero. I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: The microphones your microphones on but not working? Can we

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Speaker 1: get that working? Anyway? We were having technical difficulties. Anyway.

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Speaker 1: Around the big penis shaped table is Gandhi. There's a

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Speaker 1: Dave Brody, there's uh there it is, there's scary Garrett's

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Speaker 1: microphones now working. There's Greg t Hey, how's it going

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Speaker 1: sitting in sitting in Daniel's charing there's crowded the bottom

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Speaker 1: and they're straight, they're straight, Nate. You know, in my book,

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Speaker 1: I talked about the penis shaped table, and I talked

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Speaker 1: about how it's obviously you great t who's at the

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Speaker 1: end because you have a big pink round hit Prince Albert.

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Speaker 1: It's true. It's true though a little bit right, okay,

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Speaker 1: a little bit okay, Well, welcome to the show where

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Speaker 1: we have nothing planned. I know Gandhi only has maybe

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Speaker 1: two more minutes, so I'm gonna hang good, No, you

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Speaker 1: can't do that you've got to You've gotta schedule things happen.

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Speaker 1: You know, she has things to do, she's working, yep,

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Speaker 1: but she's at the level in her career where if

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Speaker 1: she chose to be a minute or too late to

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Speaker 1: those things'd be okay. I love that. I don't like that.

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Speaker 1: That's a bad attitude. You gotta understand people have. There's

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Speaker 1: a certain point you reach in your career where people

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Speaker 1: wait on you. They don't. It's not the other way right,

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Speaker 1: you know, but it's kind of an assholy thing to do,

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Speaker 1: saying it's the right thing to do. But if it

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Speaker 1: does happen, Yeah, you told you said they'll wait for you.

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Speaker 1: You did say that. You said, well, she's the start.

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Speaker 1: I mean she's filming a video. Yeah, not only that,

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Speaker 1: who's doing who the favor? She's doing favor because I

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Speaker 1: don't think I hate worse than anything is. Well, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'll say, well you need to do it this way,

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Speaker 1: and the company would never let me do that, but

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Speaker 1: they let you do it because yours. That doesn't work

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Speaker 1: that way. It's not true. You could be late your

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Speaker 1: el No, I don't want to be late. If I'm late,

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Speaker 1: I'm not. But you know there is treatment for other

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Speaker 1: you know what? You know what I'm trying to don't

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Speaker 1: take advantage of. It's like Mariah Carey showing up three

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Speaker 1: hours later that I do that. So anyway, Gandhi, Yes,

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Speaker 1: look at this room filled with guys. Hello fellows. There's

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Speaker 1: day Brody, there's Scary, there's Garrett, there's great Tea, there's

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Speaker 1: Straight and eight, there's me. Okay, let's let's play a game.

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Speaker 1: Ask a guy a question. You can ask any question

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Speaker 1: you want about our personal lives are private lives. What's

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Speaker 1: it like? Do you know have testicles? I think I

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Speaker 1: know that you already have. You have one big text,

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Speaker 1: one giant one. Okay, and I get everybody's answer on this.

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Speaker 1: I don't have to target one person. Well, I don't

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Speaker 1: know it, just however you want to do it? What

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Speaker 1: a diva? What is the most important thing to you,

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Speaker 1: guys about a significant other? The most important quality? Just one?

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Speaker 1: I would say trust, trust, Yeah, trust, I would agree

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Speaker 1: with that. Support boring support support, trust, trust support trust

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Speaker 1: large bob large boobs. We have one honest one. I

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Speaker 1: don't know I put important quality. Um, if I met her,

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Speaker 1: I would like to find out, you know, will she

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Speaker 1: be a good mom down down the line, like, how

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Speaker 1: will she be around around? It's nice? That's nice, Tea.

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Speaker 1: What about you, Nate, I said, trust I think that's

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Speaker 1: the biggest part. All right, let's do something else. This

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Speaker 1: is boring. Okay, Wait, when I leave the room, what

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Speaker 1: are you guys gonna talk about? Large boobs? I don't

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Speaker 1: have nothing to do with me. Even though I'm the

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Speaker 1: gay guy. I've made it very clear. I love large boobs,

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Speaker 1: and not for a sexual reason. I like to put

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Speaker 1: my head on them because it reminds me of when

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Speaker 1: I was a kid when my mom would cradle me

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Speaker 1: on her lap or whatever, and I put my head

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Speaker 1: on her boobs, I'd fall asleep. Are very comfortable boob

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Speaker 1: that's them. I always wonder when there's like a room

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Speaker 1: full of guys, I think that they kind of cater

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Speaker 1: their behavior to a girl in the room or a

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Speaker 1: woman in the room. So I always wonder what happens

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Speaker 1: when I leave. Well, wasn't it. Carla Mrie was talking

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Speaker 1: about one of her podcast what it would be like

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Speaker 1: to have a penis. I think about that a lot,

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Speaker 1: and she she was like, oh man, I would take

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Speaker 1: it out and slap people with it all day long. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: So do you ever think about what it would be

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Speaker 1: like to have a penis? Yeah? I saw this little

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Speaker 1: little gift or Jeff, however you want to pronounce it

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Speaker 1: of a baby elephant with his trunk just swinging it around,

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Speaker 1: and it said girls if they had a penis for

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Speaker 1: a day. And I'm like, because one of my friends

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Speaker 1: told me, you have no idea what it's like if

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Speaker 1: you had a penis, you would put it on everything

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Speaker 1: and in everything. That's just what we do. He's like

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Speaker 1: a keyboard band there it is, there, it is there. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: your girlfriend shold her a band, there it is. I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I don't know what's I don't think I put my

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Speaker 1: penis on a keyboard in a while. Anybody else, Well,

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Speaker 1: I never. I don't put mine inside a hot dog

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Speaker 1: bun and on his wife's forehead because she would wake

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Speaker 1: up from a sleep. That's why I face. You also

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Speaker 1: put it in scary salade, and scary wasn't looking and

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Speaker 1: then scary you know I have put it inside a

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Speaker 1: cardboard tube. I wanted to see Mr Fault cardboard, this

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Speaker 1: cardboard to go inside the whole of the cardboard tube.

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Speaker 1: How was that it was weird. It was weird for

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Speaker 1: the tube to past gone dam I mean, really, would

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Speaker 1: you love to have a penis? I would. I would

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Speaker 1: like to try it for a day, but I think

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Speaker 1: just a day it seems very cumbersome. You need it

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Speaker 1: for too, You need it for two, because you just

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Speaker 1: said you would do everything on day one. By day

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Speaker 1: two you get to realize what it's like to actually

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Speaker 1: have a penis. I always see guys like sticking their

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Speaker 1: hand in their pocket, adjusting their balls, like, no, one

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Speaker 1: can't see it. You know everything to see that, right,

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Speaker 1: But you do that. Women do that with the breast.

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Speaker 1: They'll just go my little shove like we're not doing

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Speaker 1: it because we like it, We're doing it because we

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Speaker 1: have to wrestle in summer. Summer is the work that wings.

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Speaker 1: You have to have sex with a couch? No, I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: He was going down the list of all the things

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Speaker 1: he's put his thing in. Hold on sex with a couch, yeah,

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Speaker 1: between I have not, but between the cushions on the couch.

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Speaker 1: That's weird. I never thought of that. Is it too

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Speaker 1: late for me to try that? You shot? I love

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Speaker 1: the couch, but did have a quarter ry it goes

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Speaker 1: too much off. Okay, okay, what are the questions? What's

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Speaker 1: the weirdest thing you put your penis in? Because a

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Speaker 1: hot Dog Bun woman explains a lot odd because there's

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Speaker 1: someone I won't name who it is, but somebody on

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Speaker 1: the show who's done some weird things and like almost

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Speaker 1: hurt himself kind of doing something weirdness that might be

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Speaker 1: I don't know, but I feel like there's a lot

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Speaker 1: of really good answers about things you do with your penis.

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Speaker 1: When you put your penis with a woman. Did you

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Speaker 1: do it because you wanted to? Or is an accidental

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Speaker 1: or like how did it all like how did it

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Speaker 1: all go down? Like made to fall into you like that?

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Speaker 1: But like you knew I was. I was senior in

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Speaker 1: high school. We were drinking and we were fooling around.

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Speaker 1: I really don't know what I wanted to realized he

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Speaker 1: didn't like that, but he knew said he knew it before,

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Speaker 1: but he figured he would try it anyway. I didn't

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Speaker 1: say I didn't like it. I want to get into

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Speaker 1: his mind about that, because you never get a chance

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Speaker 1: to ask someone about that, like I would never I

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Speaker 1: don't I don't have you know, very many gay friends

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Speaker 1: that are as close to you to me as you are,

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Speaker 1: or I can actually come out and ask that questions ever,

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Speaker 1: welcome to ask again. Yes, So that's what that would be.

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Speaker 1: My first question is I don't I don't know answer it.

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Speaker 1: I didn't know, all right, So then and again that's

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Speaker 1: the one question for asking gay. Let's move on to

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Speaker 1: the questions for asking gay. Oh damn, why do you

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Speaker 1: like Share so much? I don't because she's fabulous, but

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Speaker 1: I don't get it, like you know what, But it's not.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you because I took you to a Share

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Speaker 1: concert and I watched you clapping and jumping up down.

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Speaker 1: He was just as excited as I was. But when

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Speaker 1: you're gay, it's it's okay to say I love Shared,

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Speaker 1: But when you're a straight guy, sometimes you don't let

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Speaker 1: those feelings be known. I love her, I was at

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Speaker 1: the show. Share is awesome. You know what gay people

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Speaker 1: do have these iconic people we follow and we worship

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Speaker 1: this and that, And I don't know where that comes

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Speaker 1: from too. I don't know you like Judy Garland as well?

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Speaker 1: Yeah she was okay, I didn't know her Minelli. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's interesting. She's just funny okay, Barbara, Yeah, ye cry,

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Speaker 1: she's got some really good songs. I really, are there

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Speaker 1: any guys that are like iconic to gay people? Yeah? Hot?

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Speaker 1: So moving on, ask a gay boring? Really anything you

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Speaker 1: guys want to ask a girl as a girl, find one? Hey,

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Speaker 1: you know what, why do you seem like the type

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Speaker 1: of woman who would prefer to hang out with guys

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Speaker 1: over women? Oh? Do I seem like that? You do?

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Speaker 1: You seem well, maybe that's not fair. You do you

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Speaker 1: naturally roll into the hang with a guy's mode? Awesome?

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Speaker 1: Um So I was definitely a tomboy when I was younger.

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Speaker 1: I played a lot of sports. But I think I

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Speaker 1: have equal guy and girl friends. And I actually get

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Speaker 1: really concerned when there are girls who say, or women

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Speaker 1: who say, I just don't get along with other women,

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Speaker 1: they just don't like me. I think there's something wrong.

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Speaker 1: What do you think that is? I think there's something

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Speaker 1: wrong with them is. I don't know what it is.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if they're jealous or caddie or they

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Speaker 1: can't just find a way to uplift another woman or

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Speaker 1: what's going on. But that's a huge red flag to

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Speaker 1: me when I meet other women or girls whatever you

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Speaker 1: want to say, who don't get along with other fearing

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Speaker 1: Can we put this on the show tomorrow? This is

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Speaker 1: a great, great conversation because I know, because we all

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Speaker 1: love how you and Danielle have a wonderful relationship, love her,

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Speaker 1: and but I also love how you hang out with

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Speaker 1: the guys like Brody. When we first met Gandhi, remember

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Speaker 1: it was like guys hang Absolutely, she was just easy

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Speaker 1: to hang out to hang out with. I really appreciate that.

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Speaker 1: I think that's really nice, and I think that it's

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Speaker 1: really creepy when people say I just I don't know,

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Speaker 1: girls don't like me, I'm like, hmm, that's probably a

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Speaker 1: new thing, because all the girls who I've met who

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Speaker 1: say that it is definitely them thing. You guys all

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Speaker 1: know girls like that, right, You get along with the

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Speaker 1: guys more than you get along with girls. No, Honestly,

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Speaker 1: my favorite people in the world are my girl all friends.

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Speaker 1: I love them. I think they're really funny and they're

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Speaker 1: fun to hang around with. And I would have much

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Speaker 1: better conversations with women that I do with with men.

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Speaker 1: Like yeah, like I could gravitate to a group of

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Speaker 1: girls and get into their conversations a lot easier and

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Speaker 1: have a lot more fun than I would with guys

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Speaker 1: hanging out. Probably not that unusual, but there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of women who hang out with exclusively women women

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Speaker 1: except for the guy that they are dating. So I

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Speaker 1: do see that. You know, there's an extreme. Yeah, all right,

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Speaker 1: now it's time for asking Neanderthal scary. Yeah. No, I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I don't consider myself and not at all

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Speaker 1: to ten. I tend being a guy guy maybe technically six. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: this isn't a show with Neanderthal guys on it. No,

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Speaker 1: we don't have zero. But he great. He brought that

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Speaker 1: up earlier. He was saying that in his latest session,

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Speaker 1: he was talking about how the kinds of guys he

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Speaker 1: likes to hang out with our more sensitive guys and

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Speaker 1: not the like the very jock sportsman, let's go out

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Speaker 1: and buting some chick kind of so, and I thought

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Speaker 1: that I thought that was kind of interesting. I look

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Speaker 1: more when I'm talking to a guy, I'll look more

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Speaker 1: into like his real feelings of like who he really is,

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Speaker 1: than who he is when he's with a group of

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Speaker 1: people hanging out. Like even when I was in my fraternity,

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Speaker 1: there were guys where I just didn't click with because

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Speaker 1: they were like, you know, very bravado or a guy guy,

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Speaker 1: you know, like they'd be like around will kick your ash,

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Speaker 1: and then the other guys are like tea, like you know,

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Speaker 1: you don't have to keep on doing this stupid stuff,

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Speaker 1: like we could just be normal. And that was the

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Speaker 1: guys I would gravitate too. I don't think any of

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Speaker 1: us hang out with guys like scary It has a

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Speaker 1: pack of friends that sort of packaged, don't you think? Yeah, absolutely,

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Speaker 1: they're not. Yeah, but they're not like tens on that scale.

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Speaker 1: They're kind of somewhere in between. Its a little douchey,

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Speaker 1: but not really not mean way. I thus the guys

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Speaker 1: that I met that one night that we all went out,

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Speaker 1: maybe one Yeah, maybe that's what they're talking about. The

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Speaker 1: guy who has sex with everyone on the way to events.

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Speaker 1: That guy, Yeah, we did not have sex. I want

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Speaker 1: to say, Yeah, that one friend who's definitely he's not

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Speaker 1: hang out with Will the Dave's a guy's guy kind

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Speaker 1: of guy. What about you, Nate, You don't like a

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Speaker 1: guy's guy at all, you know, not really not really.

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Speaker 1: In high school, I was the kind of guy that

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Speaker 1: I would fit in with every group. I didn't sit

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Speaker 1: at one particular table to cafeteria. I was friends with everybody.

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Speaker 1: I just get I get uncomfortable around. Are you doing guys?

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Speaker 1: I'm just I have nothing in common with him, so

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Speaker 1: I get nervous. There's nothing to talk about. I'm a chameleon.

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Speaker 1: I could roll with those people, but I don't act

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Speaker 1: like them. I'm okay with I'm okay with being around

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Speaker 1: them because I feel like I can handle them. What

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Speaker 1: about you, Garrett, I'm kind of like Nate. I just

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Speaker 1: bounced around from lunch table to lunch table, but in

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Speaker 1: like too scary too. I have friends that every other

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Speaker 1: word is bro or bra, But but I could hang

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Speaker 1: with them knowing that I can walk away not sounding

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Speaker 1: like them. Yes, well good, Please don't don't start. I

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Speaker 1: can't pee in a in a men's room standing up.

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Speaker 1: I have to always try to go to the bathroom

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Speaker 1: and sit down. Where where did this come from? Well,

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Speaker 1: I'm its part about being the guy like I can't

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Speaker 1: stand up and do it. I always feel like men

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Speaker 1: that could stand at the urinal and p with other guys.

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Speaker 1: They're like they've been raised by guys, like men that

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Speaker 1: were like, you know, harder, like tougher. Let's let's look

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Speaker 1: at this for a second. I think it depends on

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Speaker 1: what peeing means to you. If it's just like going in,

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Speaker 1: whipping it out, peeing and leaving because you gotta piss,

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Speaker 1: you have you've had too much to drink. Whatever, that's

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Speaker 1: really all it is. But you turn it into like

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Speaker 1: a social socializing thing. I get nervous. I doesn't use

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Speaker 1: the public bathroom here, he uses the private one. Can't

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Speaker 1: do it well? You know a lot of people are

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Speaker 1: like that. A lot of people are pe shy. They

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Speaker 1: don't want to. You know what about women love going

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Speaker 1: to the bathroom together. Yes, I don't do that. I'm

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Speaker 1: like the one person that doesn't do that. I don't

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Speaker 1: get up and go to the bathroom with my friends

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Speaker 1: go to the bathroom, and I never am like, oh,

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Speaker 1: come in here with me while I p I think

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Speaker 1: that's so weirdly in the bathroom women. No, I'll go off.

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Speaker 1: One of my friends wants to go with them if

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Speaker 1: they asked me. But I never bring people with me.

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Speaker 1: I'm not trying to know. I think that's weird. Come on,

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Speaker 1: let's go pete together. I can't do it. I can't

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Speaker 1: do it. I can't. Okay, I'm so disappointed, but I okay,

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Speaker 1: they're such like manly men that could do that, and

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Speaker 1: I'm not a manly man like that. I can't see

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Speaker 1: what you're doing is you are equating peeing to manliness.

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Speaker 1: Peeing is just it's urinating. No, No, it's dominating. The

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Speaker 1: urinals is Oh my god, they dominated. First you hit

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Speaker 1: the back of it and go, you're my urinals. Then

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Speaker 1: you target, then you target the cake, then you target

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Speaker 1: things that are hanging there from before. I just thought

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Speaker 1: I had you stand back. You go. Yeah, how you

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Speaker 1: look at peeing differently? Our bathrooms have problems because they

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Speaker 1: just put an automated flush. Yeah, it's throwing everybody for

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Speaker 1: a loot. I always feel like someone's gonna slam me

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Speaker 1: in my head and then push me against the wall.

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Speaker 1: I wonder what it is. I know, I feel like

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Speaker 1: someone's gonna come from behind and just go. Probably your

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Speaker 1: buddy Dave does look like a little like you know.

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Speaker 1: This is the strangest one we've done today, the only

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Speaker 1: one we're done. Fifteen minute Morning Show Off