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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's starting a masculine nail salon

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Speaker 1: for men. He could bring your nails, nuts, bolts, screws,

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Speaker 1: whatever you have in there. They'll file them, paint them,

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Speaker 1: make them camouflage looking all nice and manly for your

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Speaker 1: man project. Yeah, it's Laser Stories, a segment where we

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Speaker 1: read weird news stories around the globe, just like everyone

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Speaker 1: else does, except we've got a laser. Those other testosterbroonies

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Speaker 1: just don't. This first laser story is out of the

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Speaker 1: great State of Florida. Crime news is always a little

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Speaker 1: more fun this time of year because of these three words.

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Speaker 1: Criminals in costume.

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Speaker 2: Yes it is.

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Speaker 1: I say that because twenty year old Kyle Mortimer was

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Speaker 1: dressed in a banana costume peeing on the side of

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Speaker 1: a building recently. A pedestrian saw this, flagged down a

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Speaker 1: nearby cop and went over to check it out. And

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Speaker 1: that's when he quickly realized he wasn't dealing with the

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Speaker 1: sharpest tool in the shed, because across the street from

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Speaker 1: Kyle was a long row of porta potties. As the

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Speaker 1: officer approached Kyle, the banana took off and started running

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Speaker 1: in a zigzag pattern.

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Speaker 2: Wait, because he's drunkers, he's trying not to get calt

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Speaker 2: from an.

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Speaker 1: Alligator, trying to make it harder for the cop to

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Speaker 1: catch him. Another deputy managed to snag him by the peel,

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Speaker 1: but Kyle was too slippery for him and got loose.

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Speaker 3: At this point, he should just lay down on the

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Speaker 3: ground and have one of the cops slipped.

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Speaker 1: A third officer. I'ved on the scene and finally brought

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Speaker 1: him into customers. So he's facing charges for disorderly conduct

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Speaker 1: and resisting arrest. And yes, he was still in his

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Speaker 1: banana costume when they took his mug shot. So here

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Speaker 1: is his mug shot photo in his banana outfit.

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Speaker 2: Oh, he looks like a sad banana.

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Speaker 1: You know, we're gonna post it up on our Insta

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Speaker 1: stories if you want to see it. At Brook and Jeffery.

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Speaker 2: Where's the rest of his bunch?

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Speaker 1: This next is out of Alipina, Michigan. Eight women decided

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Speaker 1: to rent a castle house on Airbnb, which was described

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Speaker 1: as an incredible historic home that's bursting with charm.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's cool.

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Speaker 1: Price was two hundred and fifty seven dollars a night

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Speaker 1: for the entire group. We were celebrating their fiftieth high

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Speaker 1: school reunion.

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Speaker 2: Hey that's cheap.

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Speaker 1: Wow, And they enjoyed the first two nights peacefully.

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Speaker 2: Oh nice.

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Speaker 1: However, the night before the big reunion, something went horribly wrong.

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Speaker 1: Two of the women, Brenda and Shirley, were attempting to

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Speaker 1: go to sleep in the turret room, and that's when

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Speaker 1: they spotted a small dark shape hovering, hovering. Wait a minute,

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Speaker 1: turns out it was a bat.

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Speaker 2: You're in a castle.

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Speaker 1: They screamed, ran out and slammed the door, and at

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Speaker 1: that point they thought they'd escaped till they were in

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Speaker 1: the stairwell and suddenly were consumed by a huge.

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Speaker 2: Swarm of bats, terrifying.

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Speaker 1: Hundreds of them. They covered their heads and ran screaming

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Speaker 1: back into the bedroom with a single bat, and they

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Speaker 1: tried to block the door cracks with towels and pillows,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, nothing could stop them from getting into the.

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Speaker 3: Room under the tiniest of holes.

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Speaker 1: Like crazy, the ladies ran to the bed and cowered

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Speaker 1: underneath their covers until dawn, when the screeching bats headed

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Speaker 1: back up to the attic. At least one of the

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Speaker 1: women says she was bitten, and an exterminator found a

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Speaker 1: large colony of brown bats up in the attic with

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Speaker 1: bat urine end quote inches upon inches of bat droppings

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Speaker 1: that they coated the floors and walls.

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Speaker 2: It's an excellent fertilizer. Yeah, I mean yeah it is.

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Speaker 1: The women who were advised to get raby shots say

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Speaker 1: that their vacation was turned into a sleepless, scream filled

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Speaker 1: night of terror, and now they want Airbnb and the

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Speaker 1: homeowner to pay. No word on how much the women

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Speaker 1: are asking for, but word is it's enough to actually

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Speaker 1: buy the house.

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Speaker 2: Wait what They just don't want a refund for the night.

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Speaker 1: This next lazer stories out of retail world. Prepare to

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Speaker 1: feel old because Urban Outfitters is now selling refurbished iPods

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Speaker 1: and calling them quote vintage. A listing for the fourth

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Speaker 1: generation iPod from two thousand and four described it as

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Speaker 1: a genuine piece of vintage retro tech and the perfect

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Speaker 1: blend of new millennium design with modern features.

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Speaker 3: Dude, I still have my iPods because I don't know

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Speaker 3: how to like Like, I made all those cool playlists

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Speaker 3: and now they're just gone.

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Speaker 2: They only live on that one device if it dies

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Speaker 2: on me. No, I don't have a time for that.

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Speaker 2: I don't. Yeah, it takes forever.

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Speaker 1: Fourth gen is before touchscreens, so with these I Pods

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Speaker 1: you still have to use the wheel on the front

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Speaker 1: to scroll through all the different songs. And they obviously

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Speaker 1: don't support wireless headphones. So I guess you know they're right.

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Speaker 1: It really is vintage.

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Speaker 3: I'm fun you kind of missed that wheel. It was

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Speaker 3: almost like roulette, you know, playing like what was land

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Speaker 3: on this time?

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Speaker 1: What's not vintage is the price tag, because they've been

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Speaker 1: selling them for three hundred and fifty dollars.

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Speaker 2: Dam good? How much do you originally pay for these things?

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Speaker 2: Anybody remember?

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Speaker 1: Right around there? Several people pointed out you can buy

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Speaker 1: one on eBay for thirty five bucks. Oh but Urban

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Speaker 1: outfitters ain't here in that mess. That model and the

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Speaker 1: fourth generation refurbished iPod Mini are both already completely sold out.

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Speaker 3: Whoa.

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Speaker 1: And so now that this has been such a huge success,

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Speaker 1: retail experts say, look out for even bigger markups on

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Speaker 1: other vintage check this Christmas. Maybe some new VCRs anyone

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Speaker 1: only seven hundred dollars classic.

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Speaker 3: I'll take a DVD player, but as long as it's

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Speaker 3: not HD or anything.

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Speaker 1: Yeah on the screen. Yeah, So cool. This next laser

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Speaker 1: story is out of the Universal Sniff Test. The parent

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Speaker 1: company of Degree Deodorant and Axe Bodies, Brey, announced deodorant

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Speaker 1: sales are finally rebounding after a huge drop during the pandemic.

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Speaker 1: That was the thing. As soon as people started working

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Speaker 1: from home, they stopped caring if they smelled like an

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Speaker 1: old shoe.

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Speaker 3: Ah. No, it's sometimes healthy to let your arm puts

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Speaker 3: just breathe.

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Speaker 2: You guys.

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Speaker 1: Disagree, But with people returning to the office, that's no

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Speaker 1: longer the case. And sales of personal care products were

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Speaker 1: up eight percent last quarter, and half of that was

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Speaker 1: just from deodorant sales.

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Speaker 3: Interesting, a lot of people have been back in the

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Speaker 3: office for a minute, Like I know, I feel like

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Speaker 3: this is a couple of talks from HR, like.

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Speaker 1: This business issue a couple of years ago. Yeah, a

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Speaker 1: study last year found once the pandemic hit there was

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Speaker 1: a huge drop and how often we were showering, wearing

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Speaker 1: deodor and shaving and applying makeup. No change for Brook

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Speaker 1: though during an I guess we were still in the

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Speaker 1: office though.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I stick to who I am unapologetically.

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Speaker 1: We even started brushing our teeth less during that time.

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Speaker 1: But Thankfully, hygiene is officially back in style and back

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Speaker 1: in the workplace.

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Speaker 2: Okay, let's shower.

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Speaker 1: That's why this guy just got his shell buffed. I

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Speaker 1: could see my reflection in it. I wear my pants. Wait,

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Speaker 1: a lot of adjustments happening. We got we had his

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Speaker 1: end laser stories. It's over for the day. We'll do

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Speaker 1: it again the same time on Friday

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Speaker 2: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.