Speaker 1: Are you leaving?
Speaker 2: I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 3: Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how
Speaker 3: much baggage you claim. You give us time and a
Speaker 3: termino and gay.
Speaker 4: We want to send you off in style. You wanna
Speaker 4: welcome you back home? Tell us all about it.
Speaker 1: We scared her?
Speaker 2: Was it fine?
Speaker 1: Malborn?
Speaker 2: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Ride?
Speaker 2: Do you need.
Speaker 6: With?
Speaker 2: Karen and Chris welcome to Do you need a ride?
Speaker 2: This is Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 6: This is Karen Colgarat did I you yes? Your hand
Speaker 6: gestures were out of control.
Speaker 2: I was trying to poke your eyes. We are driving.
Speaker 5: And uh and it seems like it's been a while.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 6: I just remembered a gift I was given at a
Speaker 6: meet and greet the last weekend we were in I
Speaker 6: believe we were in Minneapolis, but it could have been Milwaukee.
Speaker 5: Mm hmm.
Speaker 6: Somebody cross stitched the lyrics to the Taurus ad song kidding.
Speaker 6: So it's in these beautiful all caps, cross stitched all
Speaker 6: different colors to us.
Speaker 1: Now there's an American car.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly what I'm looking for.
Speaker 1: It it goes on.
Speaker 6: It's like it looks like a big paragraph that is amazing.
Speaker 6: I opened it because some places don't let us, don't
Speaker 6: let people give us gifts in the line because it
Speaker 6: takes a long time, and they and then we go
Speaker 6: over our time. So sometimes we go backstage and there's
Speaker 6: just literally a table with presents on it for us,
Speaker 6: like it's our little birthday party after the show. That's
Speaker 6: so great, and we open things and then people either
Speaker 6: have told us I'm the one that made you the
Speaker 6: mug with the mustache on it or whatever. That's usually
Speaker 6: his first even but yeah, this time it was kind
Speaker 6: of a blind one. No one had warned me, and
Speaker 6: I opened this thing and I like almost cried.
Speaker 5: It made me so up, mainly because someone puts so
Speaker 5: much work into that at the risk of maybe never.
Speaker 2: Possibly not getting to you.
Speaker 6: Yeah true, and also that I feel like that joke
Speaker 6: is like our oldest and kind of dumbest, Like I
Speaker 6: feel it it's hard joke that like people can't enjoy,
Speaker 6: and so the idea that there's somebody not only enjoying
Speaker 6: it but like cross stitching their heart out.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, to that person.
Speaker 2: That's the best.
Speaker 5: And thank you everyone for telling me to celebrate turtle Day.
Speaker 5: I've become some turtle ambassador for it, but I appreciate
Speaker 5: the job title and I'm going to do my best.
Speaker 6: It's awesome. You'll be a great turtle ambassador because you're real.
Speaker 5: Slow, and I was, yes, I am, I'm no, but
Speaker 5: that's who wins the race. Yeah, and that slow and
Speaker 5: steady has never won any race of any kind. It's
Speaker 5: always been who's fast.
Speaker 1: And more who's fast and who doesn't break their ankle.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't know what kind of race that this
Speaker 5: was with this turtle and this rabbit.
Speaker 6: I think it's like philosophical, Yeah yeah, it was real,
Speaker 6: like preachy, teachy type of race.
Speaker 5: But I thought I was just kind of talking out
Speaker 5: of my ass when I say the turtles make eye contact.
Speaker 5: But I did a little research, and they very very
Speaker 5: much do look right at your face.
Speaker 2: Really they were. I yeah, I got video footage of them.
Speaker 5: But then I put a little emoji of an eye
Speaker 5: over his real eye, and so I.
Speaker 2: Covered up the actual eyeball truth with a.
Speaker 5: JOKEI but he was looking, he turned his head and
Speaker 5: he looked right at me, like it's not. Their eyes
Speaker 5: are on the sides of their heads, so that's why
Speaker 5: I know, because he has to turn to the side
Speaker 5: and then point.
Speaker 2: The eyeball at me. Yeah. Yeah, and it was very
Speaker 2: I really appreciated it.
Speaker 6: You had a good experience with the turtle, but then
Speaker 6: you also had a great experience of being right.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that's and which that's what life's all about.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, I think so when it comes.
Speaker 2: To environmental things, being right is also a big.
Speaker 1: Part of it, because you know, what, we should save
Speaker 1: the whales.
Speaker 6: So then to actually say that and know you're right
Speaker 6: and know that that makes someone else wrong is such
Speaker 6: a good feeling because then you're saving whales and you're winning.
Speaker 2: Yep, I love it.
Speaker 1: I don't think you needed an example, but I love
Speaker 1: to give one.
Speaker 2: I didn't know.
Speaker 5: I'm glad we brought whales into it, because that's next.
Speaker 6: As far as have you ever made eye contact with
Speaker 6: a fucking whale.
Speaker 5: I haven't been on I've been on boats and I've
Speaker 5: waited to see them, but they haven't reached the surface yet.
Speaker 2: And I've wasted a lot of money on cruises.
Speaker 6: You're like, I need a breaching tonight. This is my
Speaker 6: last eighty dollars. I need a breach.
Speaker 5: Can I tell you about the time I was on
Speaker 5: a cruise ship and playing shuffleboard, and it was late night.
Speaker 5: I couldn't sleep because I was seasick, and looked out
Speaker 5: and there was a ghost boat, like a boat, a
Speaker 5: rickety old boat that someone had added a little roof
Speaker 5: like it was a row boat in the middle of
Speaker 5: the ocean. Oh no, there were two to three days
Speaker 5: in between a stop like Rowatan and hundred.
Speaker 2: I don't know where. I can't remember what, yeh.
Speaker 1: And there was just some lost person's.
Speaker 5: Boat, the flickering light on the boat, and and but
Speaker 5: the water was shaky enough to where it would tilt,
Speaker 5: and you could see the.
Speaker 2: Bottom of the boat. And there was no one in it.
Speaker 2: Oh no, but there was a light flickering. Here's ghost boat.
Speaker 1: Ghost boat. It's a real thing, Bridger.
Speaker 2: Sorry I timed it wrong.
Speaker 6: Hi. It's yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's our guest for
Speaker 6: your winers.
Speaker 7: Here microphones. I'm no longer holding it, right, I mean,
Speaker 7: I was looking forward to holding a microphone, but this
Speaker 7: is now. I can do anything I want.
Speaker 1: With my hand, that's right. Welcome to season two.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and last time you were probably in the back
Speaker 5: of a less reliable vehicle was perhaps more dogs.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, it was a long time ago.
Speaker 2: It was years and years ago. Yeah, I think two
Speaker 2: thousand and sixteen. Maybe. Oh my god, we've grown so much.
Speaker 2: We've all changed. I'm not the same at all.
Speaker 5: I'm not as good as I'm getting more quick to
Speaker 5: anger these days and put on Smellby's.
Speaker 7: You are a different man. Yeah, and you know, we're
Speaker 7: just gonna have to deal with that.
Speaker 2: I'm happy, We're happy. I'll speak with Karen. We're happy
Speaker 2: to see you. Thank you, Thank you, Karen. Do you
Speaker 2: have anything to say to me on my behalf?
Speaker 1: Chris and I would like you to know.
Speaker 6: That it's been too long and we need to know
Speaker 6: every single thing you've done since twenty fifteen.
Speaker 2: Well, let's just get started.
Speaker 7: It's the road. Go to San Francisco.
Speaker 2: Yes, Oh, we're going on along. Read a list, yes,
Speaker 2: Oh my god. To pull out my scroll and make
Speaker 2: a short hour.
Speaker 1: What's going on?
Speaker 2: What is happening?
Speaker 7: It's Sunday, Yes, it's Memorial Day weekend. I chose to
Speaker 7: go to Ikea. I have nothing to say that people
Speaker 7: have heard before about ikea.
Speaker 1: On a holiday weekend.
Speaker 2: At least meatballs.
Speaker 7: I hadn't eat a meatball. It's ex I mean, it's
Speaker 7: so tiring. I don't even know how to explain the feeling.
Speaker 7: It like breaks you down into an animal in a
Speaker 7: way that's like like it's such an unnatural thing for
Speaker 7: a person to be and you're surrounded by hundreds of people.
Speaker 7: It's just like it feels like the system is glitching
Speaker 7: for me because there are people in every corner of
Speaker 7: my eye and I don't know where I'm headed.
Speaker 2: It's such a bizarre experience.
Speaker 6: And the path is a little windy, like you're not
Speaker 6: sure where you've been and you don't know where you're.
Speaker 5: Going, no idea, right, And I don't know if all
Speaker 5: the ikeas are like this. I've only been to a
Speaker 5: couple of them, but some of the pathways just have
Speaker 5: a employee's only looking door, like a metal Oh sure, sure,
Speaker 5: both saloon style of a kitchen door.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, am I allowed in here?
Speaker 5: And then it yes, I thought I was going into
Speaker 5: the kitchen because you don't know where the mayk and know.
Speaker 7: It's you frequently go through that door and then you're
Speaker 7: back to where you began rather than closer to the finish.
Speaker 2: Why am I keep? Why am I keep? I end
Speaker 2: up my little kid beds.
Speaker 7: I walk around the store, My eyes are truly always wet,
Speaker 7: just on the verge of tears, just wondering when is
Speaker 7: this going to end?
Speaker 6: And what are you looking for? Or what were you
Speaker 6: looking for today this Memorial Day weekend?
Speaker 7: Today I actually went with the plan. Last a couple
Speaker 7: months ago, I went without a plan and just a
Speaker 7: true mental spiral, left the store with nothing and was
Speaker 7: just so depleted. Today, I went for a shoe rack,
Speaker 7: which I am not using as for shoes, but I'm
Speaker 7: using it to organize my jeens in my closet, so
Speaker 7: I'm stacking those.
Speaker 2: But I went to find the cheapest one.
Speaker 7: Of course, had to ask three separate employees to direct
Speaker 7: me to it. We finally got to the spot, I
Speaker 7: had the employee finally just guide me to the spot.
Speaker 7: They were not there, so eventually I just had to
Speaker 7: go out into the warehouse. And it was so surreal
Speaker 7: because the store was insane. I go down to the
Speaker 7: aisle that I've been directed to and you the further,
Speaker 7: I didn't realize you could get so deep into that
Speaker 7: warehouse that eventually it's quiet and there's no one there.
Speaker 7: It's like you're in the forest. It was incredible. I
Speaker 7: just stood there and then I literally I went and
Speaker 7: opened the package. It was like the mom opening the
Speaker 7: underwear to make sure they fit you sort of thing
Speaker 7: the back of the store, because I was not leaving
Speaker 7: knowing without knowing that it was going to work for me. Right,
Speaker 7: So I got two shoe racks. I bought four plates
Speaker 7: to eat cookies off of specifically, yeah, literally just for cookies.
Speaker 7: I'm not exaggerated.
Speaker 1: Sorry, did the plate have cookies on them?
Speaker 7: They should have had cookies on them, But they'll have
Speaker 7: cookies on them tonight. But no decorative Oh no, These are,
Speaker 7: of course seventy nine cents each.
Speaker 2: They are bottom of the barrel.
Speaker 6: Plates, because you know, sometimes these days it's it's like
Speaker 6: wine and cookies. Bitch, Like everything you buy have a
Speaker 6: directive of what you're using it for.
Speaker 1: Who you want to call a bitch?
Speaker 7: I don't need a fate to have an attitude.
Speaker 2: It's the worst.
Speaker 7: Although I did just buy a used mug that said
Speaker 7: that says up yours on the bottom.
Speaker 2: Still stupid, So when.
Speaker 6: You're sucking back your caffeine, you're also offending somebody in
Speaker 6: the office.
Speaker 7: Yeah, imagine it was made.
Speaker 1: That's hilarious.
Speaker 5: So when you had the employee, you got an employee
Speaker 5: to help you find these shoe racks.
Speaker 2: I got three employees.
Speaker 7: One employee didn't look look at me the entire time
Speaker 7: I was talking to him. He was just scrolling through
Speaker 7: a phone and telling me, Oh, it's on the left
Speaker 7: of the wall, and there are a.
Speaker 2: Million walls in the store. Which left.
Speaker 7: So finally I got to this third employee who I
Speaker 7: was able to follow to the location where the demo
Speaker 7: item was supposed to be. And apparently a shopper had
Speaker 7: had it and had just taken the demo item and
Speaker 7: bought it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because it's Mayhem.
Speaker 2: During the middle of a shoe wreck demo.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised.
Speaker 5: So the salesman that couldn't look at you, maybe it
Speaker 5: was because he didn't understand as I don't. And I'm
Speaker 5: not saying I'm not looking at you because my eyes
Speaker 5: are on the road, even though I'm not right. How
Speaker 5: do you put your pants in a shoe rack? You
Speaker 5: roll them up to shoe size and then put them
Speaker 5: in there.
Speaker 7: Listen like a tube. This item is groastly mislabeled. It's
Speaker 7: not just for shoes, Okay, there's plenty of space for
Speaker 7: any item you want to put on.
Speaker 2: It's like a cuby.
Speaker 7: They should call it a mini wreck, just to leave
Speaker 7: it up to meet them what I want to put
Speaker 7: on it. I don't need to put.
Speaker 2: Shoes, shoe my throat.
Speaker 7: I shouldn't be shamed for wanting to put jeans on
Speaker 7: these wrecks.
Speaker 2: Jeans and then you take it sippier up yours mugs.
Speaker 2: They really get the picture.
Speaker 7: Thank you.
Speaker 2: I kia.
Speaker 7: So that was kind of my you know, just bone
Speaker 7: aching Sunday afternoon. I also drove a forgotten to I
Speaker 7: put on my phone no highways on Google Maps, and
Speaker 7: so it took me directly through the park rather than
Speaker 7: on the freeway. It was twenty five miles an hour
Speaker 7: the entire way to Hikiya, yes, which was honestly kind
Speaker 7: of nice. That's just nice to slow down.
Speaker 1: Do you know that? When I oh, is she from
Speaker 1: the Renaissance fair?
Speaker 2: I think way, yes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's.
Speaker 6: When I lived in Silver Lake and worked in Burbank,
Speaker 6: I would often get on the freeway, and because my
Speaker 6: job was so stressful, I would have a panic attack
Speaker 6: on the freeway and then get off and drive the
Speaker 6: rest of the way through Griffith Park.
Speaker 2: Oh, I think that's a great idea. It was very relaxed.
Speaker 1: It helped me a lot.
Speaker 6: I've told the story on the show so many times,
Speaker 6: and my favorite thing that ever happened was, Oh, I'm
Speaker 6: not going to remember his name. You know the guy
Speaker 6: Dean from Quantum Leap that was like the guy that
Speaker 6: was kind of in charge.
Speaker 1: Not the Dean stock one. Dean Stockwell.
Speaker 2: Sure one time?
Speaker 1: Why Why? Because because you got it?
Speaker 5: Sure?
Speaker 1: And why Dean Stockwell?
Speaker 6: I have to stopped for him as he drove across
Speaker 6: the that street in Griffith Park in his golf cart,
Speaker 6: because he was golfing, And I stopped for him when
Speaker 6: a lot of people were just going like.
Speaker 7: Thiswhere right here you can make eye contact, Kenya.
Speaker 1: You're ashamed of your bad behavior, look down.
Speaker 2: I'm out of him.
Speaker 6: So I stopped to make sure no golfers were killed
Speaker 6: that morning, and Dean Stockwell gave me like a soldiers salute.
Speaker 1: He was so thrilled to have been given the right
Speaker 1: of way. He felt respected he did, and I did
Speaker 1: respect him.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Right. He guides you to different lives that you
Speaker 2: slip into.
Speaker 1: It's true, Well you gotta respect that.
Speaker 7: I imagine those golf carts are almost constantly being hit
Speaker 7: in that park. Twenty five miles an hour feels slow
Speaker 7: to a lot of people, and people are zipping past you. Yep,
Speaker 7: and uh yeah, it's probably a dangerous place to be, yeah.
Speaker 1: Because I think a lot of people are trying to
Speaker 1: get off.
Speaker 6: The freeway in around freeway traffic, and then because of that,
Speaker 6: they're not They're not using it luxuriously the way I
Speaker 6: would where I didn't want to ever get to work,
Speaker 6: so I was driving as slow just just.
Speaker 1: Whatever you do.
Speaker 2: You're walking all over today. Yeah, this is amazing.
Speaker 6: This is people in Los Angeles and then on the
Speaker 6: roads of Los Angeles are on their worst behavior today.
Speaker 2: It's raining.
Speaker 5: Do you guys possibly see the Quantum Leap episode where
Speaker 5: he ends up in the body? You know, there's no warning.
Speaker 5: He just ends up in these situations. And sometimes he's
Speaker 5: on a horse, there's a gunfight.
Speaker 2: You never know.
Speaker 5: One time he's just a boy in a bedroom and
Speaker 5: then he looks in the mirror and he's a down
Speaker 5: syndrome person. And then I actually they wrote down in
Speaker 5: the script and he delivered the line I'm retarded.
Speaker 7: I just saw this unbelievable, insane to watch. Some guy
Speaker 7: wrote that down and they all said, yeah, I have
Speaker 7: to say this, A full team of adults the bottom.
Speaker 2: We're fine with that. Yeah, yeah, and the oh it
Speaker 2: was it's a very jarring scene to watch.
Speaker 5: It is very jarring. So everyone watched that. If you
Speaker 5: want to field jars, check it out.
Speaker 6: And sorry to bring this up, but then, if we're
Speaker 6: talking about jarring scenes from eighties series, do you think
Speaker 6: it is less or more jarring than.
Speaker 1: The one where Haley Joel.
Speaker 6: Osmond says from Walker Texas Ranger Walker told me I
Speaker 6: have aids.
Speaker 2: I remember that one.
Speaker 7: I just watched that video as well. In the last week.
Speaker 7: I've watched both of these videos. I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1: That's crazy.
Speaker 2: So pre sixth Sense, he was doing some non union Texas.
Speaker 2: I think he was getting aids.
Speaker 5: You had to go to Texas to be in that show.
Speaker 5: They shot everything in Texas, isn't true. Yes, And I
Speaker 5: auditioned for a couple of things. Maybe I didn't get
Speaker 5: the Haley Joel, I could have been.
Speaker 2: The would have been perfect for this nine year old boy.
Speaker 2: I know I was in my mid twenties all of it.
Speaker 2: But wow, Haley Joel.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a very oddsome So Bridget you've seen the
Speaker 6: two recently, how do you think they compare and stack up?
Speaker 7: I would say I think that, Haley joelan works. Uh,
Speaker 7: it's a more fun thing to watch the other one.
Speaker 7: You're just you do not understand what's going on, and
Speaker 7: the clip ends and you're as baffled as when you began.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but you even nothing before or after that scene
Speaker 5: is going to make up for what you just watched.
Speaker 7: Oh no, you're just it makes you more lost in.
Speaker 2: The world even being stop Welsh. I mean, what does
Speaker 2: Bacula vaculus Scott blacula?
Speaker 6: Now my question is for the rest of that episode
Speaker 6: he would then was a person being treated like like?
Speaker 6: Was that the lesson that this is how people treat
Speaker 6: people a downstream? We have to change it?
Speaker 2: Right right?
Speaker 5: I can't believe I said that earlier in the episode
Speaker 5: he looks the camera.
Speaker 6: Is that the lesson learned is is he can't believe
Speaker 6: or something?
Speaker 5: Yes, don't every At the end he just looks in
Speaker 5: the camera and says, don't use the R word.
Speaker 7: Well, you better be looking in the mirror and telling.
Speaker 6: Himself that, yeah, start with the man in the mirror.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Contextually, I can't figure out where that scene would take
Speaker 7: place in an episode, or where it would go or begin.
Speaker 2: It's very confused.
Speaker 5: It has everything about its screams, cold open, starting with
Speaker 5: that cold open, and then they went to commercial.
Speaker 1: Here's a taste test of what this show is like.
Speaker 1: Just no, we don't know if we're still there though.
Speaker 5: It's and there was no theme music, so you know
Speaker 5: it's going to be a serious episode.
Speaker 2: Oh Yeahla, it's.
Speaker 1: Kind of Blacula. Now I've done.
Speaker 6: I just want the audience at home to know I've
Speaker 6: made the worst mistake you can make in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1: The driver I have just driven us.
Speaker 2: In are we going to a cure concept?
Speaker 6: I have driven us directly into Hollywood Bowl traffic.
Speaker 1: I have sat because I live.
Speaker 6: In Burbank and often do things in Hollywood, and I
Speaker 6: have sat on this strip of road for two fucking
Speaker 6: hours waiting for the Hollywood Bowl to either load in
Speaker 6: or load out.
Speaker 7: There is no reason to be here unless we're going
Speaker 7: to Billy Joel.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry to everyone in the car.
Speaker 7: This feels insane. Karen and I don't know. I don't
Speaker 7: understand why there would be traffic right now though it's
Speaker 7: Sunday night and it's raining.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I know, but it's the because because Billy Joel is.
Speaker 2: The rains and the rain.
Speaker 6: Yeah, what are they They're about to have a rain
Speaker 6: picnic while Stings sings some ship from Cream of the
Speaker 6: Blue Turtles exciting.
Speaker 2: Three scooters. It's a whole flock.
Speaker 1: Oh no, scooters have taken over this town.
Speaker 7: I thought that they would come and go, and they're
Speaker 7: certainly here to stay.
Speaker 5: They are only multiplying and ending up in trees in
Speaker 5: the ocean. I know people that make a living off
Speaker 5: of retrieving them. Really, how does that work? The bounty
Speaker 5: for a scooter that you toss into an ocean goes
Speaker 5: up to somewhere near fifty bucks if you rent My
Speaker 5: neighbor rented a sprinter van.
Speaker 7: I thought you were going to say he rented a submarine.
Speaker 2: He rented.
Speaker 5: There are so many scooters in the bottom of the ocean.
Speaker 5: A lot of scooters are ending up in turtle nostrils.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I know.
Speaker 5: I have to go there, don't I Yeah, he made
Speaker 5: so much money because you can put one hundred of
Speaker 5: these a night into it, and I think it's like
Speaker 5: five dollars to go.
Speaker 2: You take them home and recharge them. What he then
Speaker 2: where do you deliver? You can make more than an
Speaker 2: uber driver charging scooters.
Speaker 7: That is full, That truly makes sentence.
Speaker 5: He ended up buying an actual van much like the
Speaker 5: one he rented with his scooter money with hit scooter money,
Speaker 5: and he still retarded scooters and also helps people move
Speaker 5: with a with a like app.
Speaker 6: I like this guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's he's got he's uh, he's got a business.
Speaker 2: What kind of van is he driving?
Speaker 7: Tell me again, it's a sprinter van. It's like one
Speaker 7: of those windows that are very tall. Yeah, it's very tall.
Speaker 7: You can stand in them.
Speaker 2: I always think to put scooters in, sure.
Speaker 6: And also to put bands in because you always see
Speaker 6: those sprinter vans driving around near the studios, because like
Speaker 6: the band on Conan that night showed up in one
Speaker 6: of those.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 5: And I mean regular Chevy vans look pretty cool and uh,
Speaker 5: you know, you gotta hunch over and then your your
Speaker 5: whole band ends up with like a hunched back.
Speaker 7: Becomes kind of your gimmick, and then eventually people outgrow that.
Speaker 6: And they're like, we got to do something else besides
Speaker 6: bending over in the mid.
Speaker 2: Back that gets in the way of the song riding.
Speaker 6: I can't breathe properly.
Speaker 2: Oh this happening, it's just well limps.
Speaker 6: That'll be our new thing. Guy says, anyone here.
Speaker 7: I can see the there's something happening on that little sign,
Speaker 7: but I can't tell what it's.
Speaker 5: So I have terrific vision. Let me interrupt everyone on
Speaker 5: the block?
Speaker 2: It says, what could that be on the Block tour?
Speaker 1: Maybe it's New Kids, New Kids on the.
Speaker 2: Kier and Billy Joel. It's the perfect ticket.
Speaker 5: It also says tape tour. There's a pole in the way,
Speaker 5: and then it says, oh night. I can only assume
Speaker 5: there's a tea behind them.
Speaker 2: William New Kids on the Block the Tape Tour Tonight
Speaker 2: figured it out.
Speaker 7: It's actually of the mixtape tour with Tiffany Salt and
Speaker 7: Peppa Divvy. Excuse me, I had a vowel problem. Yeah, Tibby,
Speaker 7: I'm your number one fan.
Speaker 2: Why did you marry Bruce? What is that show? Oh?
Speaker 7: No, I cannot imagine sitting through that entire event.
Speaker 6: I feel like there are people who are at this
Speaker 6: event who something very traumatic happened their freshman year in
Speaker 6: high school and they can't let it go.
Speaker 2: No question wants to new Kids on the Block.
Speaker 7: I've seen one of them perform in them all, Tipney.
Speaker 7: I saw a member of New Kids. Some friends of
Speaker 7: mine were fans of his in about seventh grade, Jordan Knight.
Speaker 5: I think I'm sure he always had He always seemed
Speaker 5: like he might be kind of slimy.
Speaker 2: I'm sure.
Speaker 7: I mean he's performing in malls. In nineteen ninety eight,
Speaker 7: he performed in front of the Gap and I can't
Speaker 7: remember anything else about it, but Jordan Knight. He's back
Speaker 7: in Hollywood, so he's back on top. Those are all
Speaker 7: locations that.
Speaker 2: Flashers go to.
Speaker 6: That was the night that Bridger brought his first pair
Speaker 6: of jeans that he that he still has this day
Speaker 6: of words to put in a shoe.
Speaker 7: Beautifully stored on top of the three dollars.
Speaker 2: Rack.
Speaker 1: I still don't have the visual on how you store
Speaker 1: jeans on your shoe.
Speaker 6: Rack.
Speaker 2: I know, I let it go.
Speaker 7: You've got to use your imagination here, But I mean,
Speaker 7: imagine a beautiful four inch by nine inch long rack.
Speaker 7: They stuck on top of each other, and they're also
Speaker 7: storing my shorts, which I've discovered. I have more shorts
Speaker 7: than I expected, summertime shorts. Yes, I'm ready for summer,
Speaker 7: if that ever comes. But it feels like we've entered
Speaker 7: a rain world, which is fine.
Speaker 1: Yes, I prefer it.
Speaker 7: I would much rather this this sky from now on,
Speaker 7: me too, but it is. You know, we've all got
Speaker 7: to organize our closets in one way or the other.
Speaker 1: But four inch by nine inch what are you doing?
Speaker 7: Four inches deep? Okay, well, it's actually probably shoe inches deep,
Speaker 7: right right, the size of an eight to nine men's.
Speaker 2: Hue shoe inches they are their own measurements, or.
Speaker 1: Three inches.
Speaker 7: And then maybe a foot a foot long. That doesn't
Speaker 7: seem big enough for pants. I don't know what to
Speaker 7: tell anyone. I have horrible space, not.
Speaker 2: A twelve inch foot the length of a foot foot.
Speaker 1: Ye, stop lying about this jew wrap.
Speaker 2: Well is up.
Speaker 7: I didn't buy anything, and I have not been taik.
Speaker 7: I knew this was all a lie, big with my lie,
Speaker 7: and I've been exposed.
Speaker 5: Next thing you're going to tell, tell me is the
Speaker 5: new kids aren't kids anymore.
Speaker 2: They're full grown middle age men. Yeah, there is a
Speaker 2: shoe rack in my new closet.
Speaker 5: Oh, do you have shoes on it? It is No,
Speaker 5: I don't see how it works. It must be for heels.
Speaker 5: What I don't It's like wires. There are there are compartments,
Speaker 5: and there are wires going across, and I think the
Speaker 5: wires like thick wires where you would just hang a
Speaker 5: heel of a shoe tyrack.
Speaker 6: Maybe it's a tyrack because your apartment's old fashioned, and
Speaker 6: that's back when everybody had a thousand.
Speaker 5: Everyone they had a thousand ties, and they only had
Speaker 5: one appliance in each room.
Speaker 2: Because there's zero outlets in my house.
Speaker 5: Yeah, oh, extension cords everywhere and the whole thing's a
Speaker 5: bit of a fire hazard.
Speaker 2: And that sounds perfect. Yeah it is. I love to
Speaker 2: live by the seat of my pants or fly by them.
Speaker 7: It's time for you to buy more ties and less electronics.
Speaker 1: And grow up.
Speaker 2: Grow up.
Speaker 1: Your apartment's telling you to grow up.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I should go get a desk job and stop
Speaker 5: watching all these TVs in my house.
Speaker 1: Why not become a door to door tie salesman?
Speaker 2: I've done all the other door to door stuff.
Speaker 7: Have you done any door to door jobs I have?
Speaker 5: I have. I sold coupon books for serendipity ventures. Okay,
Speaker 5: I did cutcoa knife salesman, of course.
Speaker 2: Of course.
Speaker 5: For my baseball team, I sold a lot of chocolate
Speaker 5: bar Well, I ate half of them. Oh, and my
Speaker 5: dad had to fork over some money.
Speaker 1: Seem Wait, have we talked about this on the show.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 5: I never had access to chocolate my mom, only at
Speaker 5: carab And then all of a sudden, I have a
Speaker 5: box of chocolate bars.
Speaker 2: Of course, they're going down my hatch.
Speaker 6: Okay, this makes me feel so much better because in
Speaker 6: eighth grade, we did a chocolate fundraising sale at my
Speaker 6: school and at the end when I went to count
Speaker 6: everything up, I was thirty dollars short because I had
Speaker 6: just eaten a box of candy bars slowly over the month,
Speaker 6: just like as I did my.
Speaker 1: Homework, just chilling out eating candy bars.
Speaker 6: And I was like, wait what Yeah, I was like
Speaker 6: convinced someone stole the box. And I actually got up
Speaker 6: in front of my class and cry, oh really.
Speaker 1: Because I was like, someone stole this wax. And then
Speaker 1: later on when I realized I had just eaten it all.
Speaker 6: It was like that weird show. My face got real hot,
Speaker 6: and I was just kind of by myself, like I'm
Speaker 6: the worst person.
Speaker 7: It was kind of a sugar and insolent thing. You
Speaker 7: got overwhelmed and then forgot about it.
Speaker 6: No. I think I was in either denial or I
Speaker 6: was eating so mindlessly that that I didn't really Yeah,
Speaker 6: it wasn't like I would just be.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, I'm just gonna have another quick one.
Speaker 7: Well you have the pressure of the sails on. You
Speaker 7: were just blinded by fundraiser.
Speaker 6: Trying to escape eighth grade, which was such a terrible time.
Speaker 7: Oh, the just darkest, just like the weirdest part of
Speaker 7: you're not human for like three years. Yeah, in this
Speaker 7: dark cave of.
Speaker 1: Like hormones and confusion.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so pain.
Speaker 6: I just didn't get it because going to like hippie
Speaker 6: schools where everybody was friends and that was a big
Speaker 6: thing about friendship and friends, and all of a sudden,
Speaker 6: boys wouldn't talk to girls and they only paid attention
Speaker 6: to like the hot girls and all that shit. It
Speaker 6: was such a jarring change where I was like, sorry,
Speaker 6: what are you guys doing?
Speaker 2: Like you don't know what is this?
Speaker 7: Yeah, you have no idea what to do with yourself
Speaker 7: or your friends, and I don't know.
Speaker 6: It all gets very sexual, but like at different times
Speaker 6: for different people, so I think all the shame it
Speaker 6: just starts becoming like this big shame pool, yes, but
Speaker 6: varying levels, so no one really knows what anyone else's
Speaker 6: boner is about.
Speaker 7: And that was just me for like another an extra
Speaker 7: fourteen years on top of it to us coming out
Speaker 7: of it.
Speaker 2: Have you ever peddled anywheres on the street spreader, you know?
Speaker 7: I think I sold popcorn for the Boys Scouts, which
Speaker 7: I mean, what a horrible move on their part not
Speaker 7: to just do cookies right right?
Speaker 1: You can't bite the old girl Scout, ye seen.
Speaker 2: I guess.
Speaker 7: I mean Keebler certainly has had no problem taking over
Speaker 7: the girl. They truly have just ripped off every girl's
Speaker 7: Scout cookie and put them on store shelves with.
Speaker 2: Their little cartoons and a treehouse gimmick.
Speaker 7: Exactly the boy Scouts, though they tried the you know,
Speaker 7: flavored popcorn that nobody wants. I also think they sold
Speaker 7: microwave popcorn, which just feels like such a not a
Speaker 7: thing anyone wants to buy door to door.
Speaker 2: You're really right.
Speaker 6: Unless you're high. And then somebody rings your doorbell and
Speaker 6: you're like, I can't get it. It's the cops.
Speaker 1: And you're like, you know what, I'm gonna roll the dice.
Speaker 7: I'm gonna buy a bag of microwave pop Yeah.
Speaker 1: And then you're like, can you come in and actually
Speaker 1: show me how to do it?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 7: But then but also you're that's actually not even possible
Speaker 7: because you're buying it like for future use. You're like,
Speaker 7: because the popcorn will be later delivered to you, which
Speaker 7: are so crazy. Yes, I'd like some popcorn in three months.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm gonna really save up for it's gonna be
Speaker 6: a special occasion.
Speaker 5: Ye.
Speaker 6: Wait.
Speaker 5: My dad always told me that the sales is like
Speaker 5: the worst job because they remember selling life insurance policies
Speaker 5: and successfully selling one to someone that really didn't need
Speaker 5: it maybe or didn't have the money, and feeling.
Speaker 2: Terrible and quitting that day.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 5: And I remember when we were young, there was a
Speaker 5: this of course isn't a thing anymore, but they were
Speaker 5: selling like encyclopedias. There was like they come to your
Speaker 5: house to sell you encyclopedia. It's just as random as
Speaker 5: popcorn to want to sell you reference books for your home.
Speaker 7: It's so bizarre. At some point that apparently was very
Speaker 7: much a need. People were like, well, I'm not I mean,
Speaker 7: I'm not going to seris to buy my encyclopedias. So
Speaker 7: I guess somebody will show up at some point and
Speaker 7: we'll get the knowledge, right, yeah, six.
Speaker 5: Books, and we will see them and feel sorry for
Speaker 5: them because they didn't have a suit without a stain
Speaker 5: on the front, and buy overpriced books just because the
Speaker 5: person seems like they are desperately needing to sell some books.
Speaker 7: My question about an encyclopedia salesman is did they have
Speaker 7: like sample books they were bringing along or giant brief.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they must have, Like they must have been a ruler.
Speaker 2: Case, right, yeah, yeah, you're right, it was.
Speaker 6: I I remember getting encyclopedias. My parents were like and
Speaker 6: here's the encyclopedias that we bought you, and they're like thanks,
Speaker 6: like they did this presentation like it was this great thing,
Speaker 6: and we're like great books, like books to help us
Speaker 6: read other books. And I remember doing in sixth grade
Speaker 6: when I had to do my report, everybody drew a
Speaker 6: country name out of a bowl but that was a
Speaker 6: like I basically got picked second to last. So I
Speaker 6: got Iceland and my friend Holly got Malta. And there's
Speaker 6: no way to get information on Iceland in nineteen eighty
Speaker 6: four except for going to I went to the tour
Speaker 6: the tourists what do you call the travel agency downtown?
Speaker 2: Sure?
Speaker 6: And then I went to these brand new encyclopedias. I
Speaker 6: found the page on Iceland and I ripped it out
Speaker 6: out of the brand new encyclopedia, like I need this later,
Speaker 6: and I'm almost like, what are you doing?
Speaker 7: This was out of the family owned encyclopedia.
Speaker 1: That was really new, it was like two months old.
Speaker 5: And meanwhile I'm looking at pages from an underwear catalog.
Speaker 5: But the Internet is so important.
Speaker 2: That kind of opened everything.
Speaker 7: Bounce from Iceland to underwear ads, do whatever you.
Speaker 1: Want without going into a ravine of any kind.
Speaker 5: And exactly, if I'm not mistaken, Iceland is green and
Speaker 5: Greenland is icy, right.
Speaker 7: That's how you remember? Yes, I looked as much colder
Speaker 7: than ice.
Speaker 5: And stag tites might fall down and stalagmites tight.
Speaker 2: No, no liquor never sick. Yes, okay, thank.
Speaker 7: You, Like there's no reason for anyone to actually need
Speaker 7: to know the difference between us stilect tight and a
Speaker 7: stelect mike. No point will that come into.
Speaker 2: Us for you.
Speaker 6: But imagine if they taught everything else the way that
Speaker 6: they taught things like that, where it's like, oh, we've
Speaker 6: got this great noumatic aid, this is the way we
Speaker 6: should be teaching everything, but we'll only do it for
Speaker 6: things that hang in case.
Speaker 7: Imagine if they taught you that about doing your taxes,
Speaker 7: there any skill that you actually.
Speaker 1: Need actually using the day to day as in your
Speaker 1: adult life.
Speaker 5: Have I talked about this that they had a class
Speaker 5: in high school our senior year called prep for Life,
Speaker 5: and I one hundred percent thought they would teach us
Speaker 5: how to pay taxes because I was so paranoid graduating
Speaker 5: high school about things like tax Sure.
Speaker 2: Sure, I had a tax father.
Speaker 7: You had a tax father.
Speaker 5: I had a tax father the county, the county tax
Speaker 5: assessor for their Department of Revenue. That was tax father,
Speaker 5: and I he was the same as my real father.
Speaker 1: Oh my day.
Speaker 2: You mean by day he was tax father for all
Speaker 2: the other towns children, but at night he was just.
Speaker 6: Deady a tax father. Please get me some kind of
Speaker 6: a rebate.
Speaker 5: You're in prep for life class and they're just teaching
Speaker 5: you how to make cookies?
Speaker 2: Which brit are you going to love?
Speaker 7: Of course, I learned that I took so many foods
Speaker 7: classes in high school. I took probably two every semester. Yeah,
Speaker 7: but wait, what was happening in this prep class?
Speaker 2: That's all was. It was a homech like going to
Speaker 2: iron and so a button on your.
Speaker 5: Shiest and it was given the lofty title of preparing
Speaker 5: you for white?
Speaker 2: Wow, that's how do I get a divorce? Where do I?
Speaker 2: These are things I'm worried about at eighteen? For some reason?
Speaker 7: Those are the things you need to know.
Speaker 2: What if a man approaches me with a knife and
Speaker 2: an alley, how do I defend myself?
Speaker 6: What's more important is that can you be a skullmade? Now,
Speaker 6: come over here and learn these things?
Speaker 1: Darney socks.
Speaker 2: This happens to a lot of people.
Speaker 6: Cook this lasagna. That's the best protection against a mammoth.
Speaker 6: A knife, A hot lasagna or.
Speaker 5: A macro may owl distract him. He'll drop the knife.
Speaker 5: If you do a good job on the owl.
Speaker 1: That would be amazing.
Speaker 6: If the home like the home classes of yesteryear, were
Speaker 6: also self defense classes in general general safety classes.
Speaker 7: Oh, I would love to learn a few techniques to
Speaker 7: take down an anima.
Speaker 1: With their knitting needles.
Speaker 5: It ends up defending yourself with a fresh baked pie
Speaker 5: in the face.
Speaker 2: They somehow have to intertwine.
Speaker 6: Now, make sure you use a potholder so that your
Speaker 6: hand doesn't burn while you put this scalding pie into
Speaker 6: the intruder space.
Speaker 5: We just wrote what will Orlando being at seven or
Speaker 5: eight minute sketch on SNL.
Speaker 7: They will be using a wind sock to like take
Speaker 7: out somebody attacking them in an Yes? Yes, did you
Speaker 7: have to make wind socks in middle school?
Speaker 2: Now? Am I saying that?
Speaker 6: Right? Just?
Speaker 2: What does anyone even know what a wind is? Before
Speaker 2: the Internet?
Speaker 5: You couldn't just type in how windy is it outside?
Speaker 5: You had to judge it by the tenacity of a
Speaker 5: sock of my colorful sock. I know what a windsock
Speaker 5: is because we had a very popular hang gliding vista
Speaker 5: near my house in Missoula, and there's always a wind
Speaker 5: sock up there and you look up at it. Boy,
Speaker 5: it's windy out today. There's a wind sock on top
Speaker 5: of that building.
Speaker 2: You're kidding?
Speaker 5: Any classic windsock oh, windsaw. It's an orange classic windsack.
Speaker 5: You think they don't exist anymore until you're.
Speaker 7: Looking for it, until you're speaking of them.
Speaker 2: That they appear in drones. It's almost scary. A wind
Speaker 2: sock army will approach.
Speaker 7: The wind sock I made in seventh grade. Now they
Speaker 7: got in the sewing machine.
Speaker 1: Did you get kicked out of that class I had?
Speaker 7: I had to go after school to make my wind sock.
Speaker 7: It was so poorly made. Its humiliating it. I can't
Speaker 7: work with my hands. I'm just not.
Speaker 2: I'm not built to work with my hands.
Speaker 1: But you are being asked to sew like nylon.
Speaker 5: A full nylon sock, which it sounds. I mean it
Speaker 5: is a tapered cylinder, a fabric.
Speaker 2: It's not. It's hard to figure it.
Speaker 7: Oh, it was extremely difficult. I mean it seems fun
Speaker 7: at first you get to pick the three colors.
Speaker 2: I did the Utah.
Speaker 7: Jazz, and then you're making it and suddenly like you
Speaker 7: haven't used a sewing machine before, and you have to
Speaker 7: make a thing that is going to billow in the wind.
Speaker 2: Forget it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and sewing machines, because I took sewing in four
Speaker 6: each are insanity they just it's insanity.
Speaker 2: You're putting your fingers next to this needle that's just pounding.
Speaker 6: Down, and it doesn't stop when you stop it. It
Speaker 6: stops when it's done. After you stop it.
Speaker 5: Oh, and it's done going between that flap between your
Speaker 5: forefinger and thumb.
Speaker 2: That's all that hor I can't I always. I don't
Speaker 2: mean some night, I don't know if it's a show
Speaker 2: I saw that's a final destination.
Speaker 5: It's the worst thing I can think of, like a
Speaker 5: water slide made of razor blades. Yeah, there are certain
Speaker 5: things that I always thought of as a kid to
Speaker 5: make me. I don't know, to fag yourself out now.
Speaker 5: I just think about the things I've said at parties.
Speaker 5: But the sewing machine thing is just so horrifying. I
Speaker 5: don't think I'll ever learn how to. I want to sew,
Speaker 5: I know, I want to have my own course.
Speaker 6: It would be fun and interesting, but there's too much
Speaker 6: risk involved.
Speaker 7: Karen and four h did you make anything with sewing machine?
Speaker 6: Yes, I had a pillow that I had for years,
Speaker 6: and I bet you it's still like at my sister's house.
Speaker 1: It was a pillow that I sewed a green.
Speaker 6: I think I I think I undersold and just made
Speaker 6: it a three leaf clover, but it was. It was
Speaker 6: a it was this three or four but from when
Speaker 6: I remember three leaf clover on the front and then
Speaker 6: on the the piece of material was like green floral pattern,
Speaker 6: so like it was a cute throw pillow with lace.
Speaker 1: Around the outside. Very understuffed.
Speaker 6: I was afraid to overstuff it, so it was a
Speaker 6: little climsy. And my aunt Jean was the one who
Speaker 6: taught sewing, so it was all I felt like I
Speaker 6: should be should have been better at it than I was, like,
Speaker 6: but I didn't.
Speaker 1: I wasn't that good.
Speaker 5: A lot of pressure coming from a family of professional
Speaker 5: pillow makers.
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 7: They made their fortune.
Speaker 1: Oh you don't know.
Speaker 6: Yes, I'm the heiress to the throw pillow fortune.
Speaker 1: All throw pillows are made by my dad.
Speaker 6: I'm trying to get us to that drive through Starbucks,
Speaker 6: but I think I've taken the wrong way.
Speaker 5: I have so many Starbucks cards from the road that
Speaker 5: apparently it makes my voice crack.
Speaker 2: I have a lot of talking about it.
Speaker 5: I just really love contributing to that giant company that
Speaker 5: we mentioned.
Speaker 2: Let's just put money into their bank. They can get
Speaker 2: interest from.
Speaker 5: Sure, there's these mod pop coffees that taste better, but
Speaker 5: there's grounds in the bottom.
Speaker 1: I don't know though.
Speaker 6: People say that all the time, but I have been
Speaker 6: so severely disappointed by so many mom and top right
Speaker 6: coffee things on the road.
Speaker 1: Where like, I know the level of bad and good that.
Speaker 6: I'm going to get from Starbucks every single time.
Speaker 2: Right, that's true. I appreciate you know it will just
Speaker 2: be fine and you can move on. Yeah, and there's
Speaker 2: no moms or pops involved. Yeah? Which other people?
Speaker 6: Your parents?
Speaker 2: They stand?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 6: Your house smells weird. Why do you serve pepsi at dinner?
Speaker 6: These children have to eat normal nutrition?
Speaker 2: Why am I locked up down here?
Speaker 6: Where are the children here? I'm here to play with children.
Speaker 2: It's not a sleepover at all.
Speaker 1: This is very strange.
Speaker 2: Somebody take off a ski mask.
Speaker 6: Now, Bridger, you grew up in Utah. From Utah, you
Speaker 6: played on the Utah Jazz for years.
Speaker 7: Well, John Stockton and I would kind of switch off
Speaker 7: share with Karl Malone.
Speaker 6: What is the because I think, like I've we've done
Speaker 6: shows there a couple of times, like it's so beautiful,
Speaker 6: so cool.
Speaker 1: What do you think is the weirdest part about growing
Speaker 1: up in Utah. What was for you?
Speaker 7: I mean, I mean obvious. The obvious point would just
Speaker 7: be Mormonism in general. Okay, there are so many facets
Speaker 7: to that, but yes, I side, I would say, just
Speaker 7: like the small part of that is the amount of
Speaker 7: milk being drank with things that aren't cookies. Okay, because
Speaker 7: I will, I will say I will stand up for
Speaker 7: drinking milk with cookies as an adult. I've been shaying
Speaker 7: multiple times about being an adult who drinks milk with cookies.
Speaker 7: But I think that's a perfectly acceptable thing. Mormons drink
Speaker 7: milk with just straight up every meal. Yeah, like pizza,
Speaker 7: las ya, that's.
Speaker 2: A good one.
Speaker 5: I mean, stull, you got anything cheese, baked, cheese based
Speaker 5: and baked.
Speaker 7: But to me that seems too much crazy. Yeah, to
Speaker 7: be drinking just a dairy product with like a meal,
Speaker 7: like eating a chicken breast and drinking milk seems like
Speaker 7: something has snapped.
Speaker 1: You know what's funny, that's we did that in my home.
Speaker 6: I mean, growing up, we had milk with every meal
Speaker 6: because Petaluma was such a huge, so many dairy ranchers
Speaker 6: were there.
Speaker 2: Oh, that makes so much supporting the hometown.
Speaker 6: Yes market, they had lots of milk and billboards for
Speaker 6: milk and don't forget to drink your milk like all that,
Speaker 6: like yes, all that milk advertising that was supporting basically
Speaker 6: the business of our town.
Speaker 7: And I think there was just a period when everyone,
Speaker 7: everybody got tricked into thinking, you've got to just stuff
Speaker 7: your body with milk.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this will help you grow, right, It's.
Speaker 1: Good for your bones, teeth, hair, Yeah, it was.
Speaker 5: It was the reason I had never broken a bone,
Speaker 5: not the fact that I hadn't fallen or anything.
Speaker 2: It's nothing to do. I was in trouble once at school.
Speaker 2: I'm not kidding.
Speaker 5: I had to see the principle because I was being
Speaker 5: disruptive because I was clearing my throat all the time,
Speaker 5: and I had to go to a doctor and the
Speaker 5: doctor said I was drinking too much milk. Really, so
Speaker 5: we cut down on my milk intake and I stopped
Speaker 5: always having.
Speaker 2: Phlegm in how much milk were enough? Drinking about three gallons?
Speaker 5: I was drinking enough milk to be on morning radio
Speaker 5: trying to win the gallon milk challenge.
Speaker 2: You guys know about that? Is that true?
Speaker 5: No one can do it without vomiting. You can't oh
Speaker 5: that milking In one sitting.
Speaker 1: There was also a woman who tried.
Speaker 6: There was a water drinking challenge on a radio station Sacramento,
Speaker 6: and the woman died.
Speaker 7: Yes, Oh, I was trying to win the Nintendo Wii.
Speaker 7: I remember this. It was called like hold your Wii
Speaker 7: for weed. No, absolutely just died because of it. And
Speaker 7: the whole thing seems maybe like not worth a Nintendo
Speaker 7: we Wow.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I wondered two hundred dollars. They still
Speaker 2: gave the weed to We're family.
Speaker 7: I hope that they got to play we bowling for
Speaker 7: a few months, maybe not.
Speaker 2: To take their mind off of maw.
Speaker 7: The tennis game is very fun.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 6: We played the tennis game at Christmas the year like
Speaker 6: after that came out, me and my cousins. And you
Speaker 6: know how it does the thing where the we Fitness
Speaker 6: will tell you like your fitness age, Oh, sure, you'll
Speaker 6: play a game, and then afterwards it tells you, well,
Speaker 6: we played wee tennis and then it told me I
Speaker 6: was sixty two?
Speaker 2: What is that based on?
Speaker 6: It picks up your pulse, yes, your polls and how
Speaker 6: you move and everything, well.
Speaker 7: Were five thousand years old.
Speaker 2: I mean, you're a pile of dust.
Speaker 1: Good job on tennis, fool.
Speaker 7: Oh one other thing. I'm just realizing that I have
Speaker 7: to imagine it is unique to Utah. I remember a
Speaker 7: lot of home smelling like gravy. Oh, I remember going
Speaker 7: to a lot and I can't I imagine that's because
Speaker 7: there were a lot of Sunday dinners being made that
Speaker 7: just eventually stained the house with the smell of gravy.
Speaker 1: Oh you permanent.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Look at this guy walking in track.
Speaker 2: We're about to watch him get hit.
Speaker 5: I always dropped. We're going to watch, but he's kind
Speaker 5: of breaksancing. This is performance hard, but he's angry. Oh
Speaker 5: and now he's well, cup don't know him.
Speaker 2: Is that a canyon? I don't like when people that
Speaker 2: ill in the brain are young. Oh yeah, what path
Speaker 2: has happened?
Speaker 1: I know, drugs path?
Speaker 5: Yes, a year ago, I at a job and a
Speaker 5: beautiful girlfriend. I don't know, I'm making that up. In Utah,
Speaker 5: it seemed like and this is probably a product of
Speaker 5: a lot of kids, like families with kids. But we
Speaker 5: went to visit family friends there, the Lees and their
Speaker 5: neighbor had they they had trampolines, and trapees, swings and
Speaker 5: rope swings in their house with in the house with
Speaker 5: padded like gas like bean bags that you could land on.
Speaker 2: I remember it being a gymnastics Well.
Speaker 7: This is something that I do think that I've learned
Speaker 7: more recently that like, not every home in America has
Speaker 7: a trampoline in the back. In Utah, truly every other
Speaker 7: home it was a trampoline because.
Speaker 2: You got to make your eight kids.
Speaker 7: Yeah, there's got to be some source of entertainment that
Speaker 7: several children can be using ones.
Speaker 5: I think that's what I in this place also didn't
Speaker 5: want their kids to be outside.
Speaker 2: My family did not have one.
Speaker 7: My mom was terrified that we were all going to
Speaker 7: paralyze ourselves.
Speaker 2: Right, so was my mom.
Speaker 7: It was kind of like the dangerous thing to do
Speaker 7: to go to a friend's house and jump on the trampoline.
Speaker 6: I know, somebody, this is upsetting, so trigger warning everybody.
Speaker 6: I know a girl who's a comedian in San Francisco,
Speaker 6: Liz White, who was really hilarious, so funny. When she
Speaker 6: was a kid, she jumped on a trampoline, fell, her
Speaker 6: hair got caught in the springs, oh.
Speaker 1: No, and it ripped her down.
Speaker 6: She survived and it was replaced and fine and everything
Speaker 6: like that.
Speaker 1: But I remember I think she told me that story.
Speaker 7: Oh, and they sewed it back on.
Speaker 2: Yeah. How does she look now?
Speaker 1: Normal?
Speaker 2: Great, beautiful head of hair.
Speaker 1: Yes, you would have never known. Oh you would have never.
Speaker 2: I mean not.
Speaker 5: I know it's too late to say, but her parents
Speaker 5: should have had that blue padded cover over those springs.
Speaker 6: This is how people learned that lesson in the seventies
Speaker 6: by having that just scow.
Speaker 5: I think I just had some legs hair plucked off
Speaker 5: my mom's chain fund exercise tramp.
Speaker 2: And so you get a taste of what could happen.
Speaker 1: What would you like?
Speaker 2: I would like?
Speaker 6: Can I get a double tall one pump mocha and
Speaker 6: a Venti vanilla latte?
Speaker 2: You're welcome, and I'll have just a n iced coffee
Speaker 2: with almond milk.
Speaker 1: And a Grande iced coffee with almond milk.
Speaker 2: Just an ice green tea.
Speaker 1: Yep, and unsweetened. Please?
Speaker 2: What about your.
Speaker 1: Hot please?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Thank you?
Speaker 6: And then can I also get a Grande green tea?
Speaker 2: Hot? Oh? Karen, can get an.
Speaker 1: Iced sorry Grande green sea iced? Please?
Speaker 2: No sweet, no sweetener please?
Speaker 1: That will be it?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 1: Oh, hell yeah, fourteen sixty Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's uh, that's These coffees are coming to us
Speaker 5: courtesy of Sarah and Amy, who I think they were
Speaker 5: in Boise or Bend.
Speaker 2: I believe this are these are sweet boisy people and
Speaker 2: brought it to you.
Speaker 5: Yes, so thank you Sarah and Amy. This is too Chris,
Speaker 5: Karen and Stephen, and this is proof that I'm sharing
Speaker 5: it with you too.
Speaker 2: They were very.
Speaker 5: Worried that I I've been given a lot of warnings
Speaker 5: to not award these and to share them with both
Speaker 5: of you.
Speaker 1: You know, it's funny.
Speaker 6: No one's ever said that to me, and I think
Speaker 6: I've actually taken them and said to people, I'm going
Speaker 6: to use this and not tell anyone you gave it
Speaker 6: to me.
Speaker 1: They don't say a war.
Speaker 5: They really they went, well, well, I guess we know
Speaker 5: who's the podcast favorite.
Speaker 6: No, but actually people, it's so exciting because people give
Speaker 6: us this like when they're like, I have a thing
Speaker 6: for you that goes along with the show, which is incredible,
Speaker 6: really cute, But then on top of it, then they
Speaker 6: go please tell Chris, I say hi, like like new
Speaker 6: Kids on the Block fans there.
Speaker 7: Me screaming to Jordan I met a lot of people.
Speaker 5: I met Boise was I, you guys have to go
Speaker 5: do my favorite murder there because Bois is filled with
Speaker 5: fans of all us and you in there the sweetest
Speaker 5: people and they lined up and they're polite, and everyone
Speaker 5: was just said nice things and I liked it a lot.
Speaker 2: It put me in a good mood for at least
Speaker 2: twenty four hours.
Speaker 7: With those potato chips, just to reach up and get
Speaker 7: I don't understand what's happening there. Oh yeah, it feels
Speaker 7: like a weird disponse.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess it's okay to have a drive through impulse.
Speaker 6: You try to grab them on your drive out and
Speaker 6: if you can get them, you can get them.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's like that on Avertsy Circle.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a merry god.
Speaker 2: Yeah for robotic horses.
Speaker 7: I mean when I say stuff like that, it's hard
Speaker 7: not to think that maybe I had a little mini stroke.
Speaker 2: Oh, let's believe Horsey Circle.
Speaker 6: I find that I've been podcasting so much lately, I
Speaker 6: can't control my brain or mouth anymore.
Speaker 5: It's just non stop, right, And I find that, thank
Speaker 5: you very much.
Speaker 2: I get comfortable enough now.
Speaker 5: I used to get so nervous and I'm like, gotta
Speaker 5: say good stuff, and now I'll forget that we're podcasting,
Speaker 5: and I just start thinking of things I need to
Speaker 5: get at the grocery store.
Speaker 2: And it probably doesn't make for good entertainment. I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: but people, I mean like to know what you're buying
Speaker 2: at the grocery store. Milk, eggs, heats it, milk. Let's
Speaker 2: do lessons on you. I've so much in my throat,
Speaker 2: so much clearing.
Speaker 5: Oh when I went into this house that was a
Speaker 5: beautiful gymnastics padded fun room.
Speaker 2: Sure, I was so excited about it. Was like I said,
Speaker 2: Jesus Christ. And because they kicked me out and I
Speaker 2: didn't get.
Speaker 5: A play, I just got a taste of it.
Speaker 7: I feel like we've talked about this before. Really, yes,
Speaker 7: I don't know in what's setting it.
Speaker 1: They have been on our last five years ago.
Speaker 5: I have maybe five Utah stories, and the other ones
Speaker 5: are about snowboarding.
Speaker 7: But saying that will absolutely get you kicked out of
Speaker 7: a Utah home. That will Jim my boyfriend, every time
Speaker 7: we go home to Utah. He is so terrified he's
Speaker 7: going to say that in front of my family.
Speaker 2: Oh right, yeah, Oh God, follies.
Speaker 7: Like half of his brain is just being used to
Speaker 7: censor himself from saying anything that could potentially step on
Speaker 7: any time.
Speaker 5: I'm so glad that when that happened, my dad was
Speaker 5: I have parents that don't care and allowed to swear
Speaker 5: like a sailor, and I appreciate you.
Speaker 2: I do want to get back to the word b
Speaker 2: o I s e.
Speaker 7: I'd like everybody to say that right now, because I've
Speaker 7: recently been told I say it incorrectly.
Speaker 2: Boise, they bois. They want you to go with a
Speaker 2: hard as boys. You're oh, is that true? Bois? Oh,
Speaker 2: a lot of guy. This is wonderful, So you're right.
Speaker 2: I can't believe I'm right.
Speaker 5: Yes, And but Missoula, Montana, which is two says you'd
Speaker 5: think it would be Missula.
Speaker 7: I'm sure it's Missoula. Like Missoula, that would seem crazy Missula.
Speaker 2: Yeahsilla.
Speaker 7: Missoula is easier and doesn't make you feel as wild.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, and there is a bit odd that well.
Speaker 7: But now it's correct, and I'd like everyone to get
Speaker 7: on the same page.
Speaker 5: And when I'm in Tempe, Arizona, they like go temp Temp.
Speaker 5: They add an extra eat. That's a letter that isn't
Speaker 5: even there to be acknowledged.
Speaker 2: But you're stretching it out for no reason.
Speaker 6: Yeah, this is every city that we go in do
Speaker 6: live shows in. It's NonStop mispronunciation of cities other cities
Speaker 6: in the area. Oh sure, And I did one recently
Speaker 6: when we were in I believe Minneapolis that was so
Speaker 6: hilariously incorrect. Because I was just reading it, I think
Speaker 6: it was like, I can't remember. Oh, it was really funny.
Speaker 7: I feel like you get to the Midwest and there
Speaker 7: are just these words that are impossible to pronounce.
Speaker 1: Yes, and it's local stuff.
Speaker 6: It's like it's the way, you know, if you're from
Speaker 6: the Boston area, you know you're supposed to say woolster,
Speaker 6: but when you're reading it off the page from Wikipedia
Speaker 6: that you just slap together three hours before, it looks
Speaker 6: like Worcester.
Speaker 1: And of course what you end up.
Speaker 2: Saying, it's the same way colonel looks like Colonel.
Speaker 7: These things were created by maniacs.
Speaker 1: Yes, and people who are trying to embarrass us.
Speaker 7: Yes, it's entirely just a trap of embarrassments, oh, set
Speaker 7: for all of us that are readers. I'm a reader
Speaker 7: first to speak a second.
Speaker 2: I'll never forget.
Speaker 5: I was already in my thirties the first time I
Speaker 5: read the word yamaka during an audition, I said your
Speaker 5: yr mo, Yeah, you're a molky, and they all laughed,
Speaker 5: thinking that was a creative choice.
Speaker 1: I made play along.
Speaker 5: But then after they laughed, they saw the look on
Speaker 5: my face and they're like, oh, you poor kid. You
Speaker 5: you grew up in such a white area that there
Speaker 5: was no jewel.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, in Missoula, you're not going to look.
Speaker 7: The crazy thing about that word, though, is like you
Speaker 7: look at it, You're like, there is no way to
Speaker 7: say this. Yama cut does make sense because the way
Speaker 7: it's spelled is truly unpronounceable if you're just trying to
Speaker 7: read it out.
Speaker 2: And that's what I like. Yeah, it looks like.
Speaker 6: I was in an audition one time, and it was
Speaker 6: for a terrible television show in the nineties that and
Speaker 6: of course I was there to play the rebellious slash sister.
Speaker 6: And that's the only parts I ever got. Moore was
Speaker 6: the man hungry, man eater. It was always that really yes,
Speaker 6: because it because it was the secret code for fat.
Speaker 6: So I was there except for at this one. There
Speaker 6: was all types of ladies all across the board and
Speaker 6: many many very young beautiful girls, where I was like,
Speaker 6: why did I get called in on this? And in
Speaker 6: the scene and I'm sure I've told you the story, Chris,
Speaker 6: but in the scene, the girl says to her sister,
Speaker 6: who's the star of the show. And then this rebellious
Speaker 6: sister goes, I'm going down to the strip club tonight
Speaker 6: because an a condo man's going to be there.
Speaker 2: Ohoy, and men's strip club, right, A thing that doesn't happened.
Speaker 6: Happened ever happened, but it surely has been at yeah,
Speaker 6: in bad sitcoms. But so this girl, I'm sitting there
Speaker 6: watching all these other people, and I'm like every audition
Speaker 6: I ever had just drained me of my entire life force.
Speaker 6: Like of course everything about it would would hurt me
Speaker 6: in every way possible, So I'm just standing. I actually
Speaker 6: got up from the waiting area and went into the
Speaker 6: kitchen just so I could be away from all these
Speaker 6: actresses because it was so painful to me. And one
Speaker 6: came in and I'm sure she's famous now because she
Speaker 6: was beautiful. It looked like a model, and she was
Speaker 6: really nice, and she came in and she goes, can
Speaker 6: I ask you a stupid question? And I don't even
Speaker 6: think she said stupid, She's just like, can I ask
Speaker 6: you a question? I said sure? And she goes, what's
Speaker 6: a knack?
Speaker 1: And a man?
Speaker 2: Mean? Oh?
Speaker 6: And I said, and a condoman. It's a snake. It's
Speaker 6: a really huge snake. It's a reference to the man's pen.
Speaker 6: And she goes, oh my god, thank you so much.
Speaker 6: And then I was like, should I just leave now?
Speaker 6: I don't want this fucking part.
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna say this line. This is a fucking disgrace.
Speaker 6: This whole thing is a disgrace.
Speaker 2: Oh god.
Speaker 5: And she's a wealthy, she's a famous person. Now she
Speaker 5: lives in a glasshouse and looks down upon other people who.
Speaker 2: Can't to Google.
Speaker 6: It was probably Deborah Messing, a young fresh nineties Deborah Messing.
Speaker 6: I was helping to get to lead her way to.
Speaker 7: Repeat that again, the way you should pronounce.
Speaker 1: It a n acandemic.
Speaker 2: Wow, was there hyphens between each letter?
Speaker 6: No? No, it was just that kind of thing where
Speaker 6: it's like she was clearly the prom queen from her
Speaker 6: small town and she was like, I'm fucking going to
Speaker 6: La and here's the thing That's when I think I
Speaker 6: first realized I'm a writer before I am an actress.
Speaker 6: I want to help the people who are going to
Speaker 6: get the job to do it right, as opposed to
Speaker 6: sit there and I can't pretend like I think this
Speaker 6: is good writing or even anything that should be shown
Speaker 6: to anybody. Most of the time I would read those
Speaker 6: scripts and be like, this is going to hurt children,
Speaker 6: this is going this is going to ruin our society.
Speaker 6: And I was writing. I can't tell you how many
Speaker 6: times I auditioned for sitcoms about women about talking dogs,
Speaker 6: and the women owners would fall in love with the dogs.
Speaker 1: I'm not walking kidding. That would happen once a year.
Speaker 5: Yes, how did they make Oh they put pain better
Speaker 5: in their mouths?
Speaker 2: I always forget how they make dogs talk?
Speaker 5: Richard, When when's the last because it had been a
Speaker 5: couple of years for me until last night. When's the
Speaker 5: last time you went to the house party?
Speaker 7: House party? I thought you were going to say strip
Speaker 7: club notes. You say, who do you think you're talking about?
Speaker 7: House party? I truly couldn't tell you the last one.
Speaker 7: I was probably a holiday party, right, I.
Speaker 5: Guess I'm not counting those, Okay, I don't know why,
Speaker 5: because everyone's on their best behavior and you're dressed up
Speaker 5: and you bring cookies or you bring cookies. I what
Speaker 5: was your last house last night? I just ended up
Speaker 5: at a house with a bunch of people. I didn't
Speaker 5: know your age.
Speaker 2: No, that's the thing.
Speaker 5: That's the That's what I'm realizing is I'm I've grown
Speaker 5: old and my brain isn't catching up to the fact
Speaker 5: that everyone there was the oldest person there was thirty
Speaker 5: and I'm oh sure sure everyone was smoking weed and drinking,
Speaker 5: and I had so much fun and.
Speaker 2: I just, oh, you felt in your elements.
Speaker 5: Enjoyed myself and I laughed at a reasonable time, but
Speaker 5: I enjoyed the human interaction.
Speaker 2: And I'm a bit of a party boy.
Speaker 7: You're just born to party. Nobody doing that till you die.
Speaker 1: Everyone knows that about you.
Speaker 7: That's the only thing that anyone knows about Chris.
Speaker 1: He's a party bo.
Speaker 2: The party I know.
Speaker 7: And I'm like, in the last four weeks, I can
Speaker 7: visualize myself being at a party and leaving it early
Speaker 7: enough to be like, oh, I regret leaving the party.
Speaker 2: I was.
Speaker 7: I was actually enjoying myself and just the thing in
Speaker 7: my brain. That's like, I hate being here, overrided the
Speaker 7: fact that I was actually enjoying myself and forced me
Speaker 7: to go home and sit in front of the TV.
Speaker 2: I ignored the initial when I first went there.
Speaker 5: I'm like feeling nervous about interaction with a bunch of strangers.
Speaker 5: I really didn't know anyone there except my pal Jam
Speaker 5: that I went with. And then I ignored it, and
Speaker 5: then it paid off and I felt good about it,
Speaker 5: and I almost left a couple times, and I made
Speaker 5: myself stay, and I.
Speaker 2: Oh, good for you. Yeah, I had a great time.
Speaker 7: I need to like wear a little reminder bracelet when
Speaker 7: I go to a house party that if I'm enjoying myself,
Speaker 7: that's okay, and I can continue enjoying myself rather than
Speaker 7: just driving home.
Speaker 1: Yes, well, but I think it's hard the older you get.
Speaker 6: Like when I used to go to house parties in
Speaker 6: my twenties, I would show up already dron We would
Speaker 6: come from bars and go to parties, or you come
Speaker 6: from a different party.
Speaker 2: It was I did.
Speaker 6: Last one of many parties, so the like getting into
Speaker 6: the pool was much easier. Whereas as an adult, when
Speaker 6: I go to parties, I'm by myself. I'm sober, yes,
Speaker 6: and it honestly feels like yet another audition for a
Speaker 6: part I don't want.
Speaker 7: Being so is at a house party is absolutely excruciating.
Speaker 7: It unless something really magical happens and you run into
Speaker 7: like ten people. You know, yes, yes, you're going to
Speaker 7: feel horrible.
Speaker 5: I was proud of myself for just meeting new people
Speaker 5: and enjoying the experience. By your right, I'm embarrassed that
Speaker 5: I didn't realize the reason I've been to a house
Speaker 5: party is because I'm forty four and it's for twenty
Speaker 5: year old And I keep thinking about that now and
Speaker 5: I'm like, why do I I.
Speaker 7: Wondering why you weren't going to any graduation parties?
Speaker 2: Last time you guys swung at a pinata.
Speaker 6: But that makes me think of we have a friend
Speaker 6: who has a roof party every year famously, and lots
Speaker 6: of stars go to it.
Speaker 1: It's like a combination of stars.
Speaker 2: Idnomic you're talking about and you.
Speaker 6: I went one year by myself and I was like,
Speaker 6: why are you doing this whatever? And you were there
Speaker 6: with Tig and the three of us did a bit
Speaker 6: for probably half an hour where we pretended different casual
Speaker 6: ways to jump off the roof mid conversation, Do.
Speaker 1: You remember that?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 6: And it was it was the moment where I went,
Speaker 6: I'm so glad I came to this part because I was.
Speaker 6: I wanted to leave really bad, and instead I let
Speaker 6: it simmer and then you and Iron Tig did the
Speaker 6: best bit of all time.
Speaker 5: Every time I go to a party there I look
Speaker 5: over that ad it's hoped there is a like mid
Speaker 5: thigh high guard rail and that's it. And that's the
Speaker 5: top of a thirteenth story building, an unlucky number of stories,
Speaker 5: and it's so scary.
Speaker 2: I look over it and just to get the shivers.
Speaker 2: So it's funny.
Speaker 7: At some point you need to commit to the bit,
Speaker 7: and that party felt like we might. You'll be the
Speaker 7: star of that party for the rest of the time
Speaker 7: the party exists.
Speaker 2: How committed am I to being a comedian?
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's time to die if you really are, If
Speaker 6: you're really committed, you must die.
Speaker 7: This reminds me of the man whose wife fell off
Speaker 7: the cliff. Did you guys see this yesterday?
Speaker 2: Yes? No, truly insane. Look at we have somebody running.
Speaker 5: Oh Jesus, got your bad belly, boy, bad belly boy added.
Speaker 6: He was up to own.
Speaker 2: What this is? Uh, what happened?
Speaker 7: Oh the cliff wife. Well, my boyfriend he had seen
Speaker 7: it first. He's like, have you seen this video? This
Speaker 7: is talking to me about how it's this inspirational and
Speaker 7: bless Jim's heart. He's very sweet and very emotional. He's like,
Speaker 7: this guy is telling everyone that to live their life
Speaker 7: as fully as possible. Because he had seen his wife
Speaker 7: fall off a cliff, I was like, I have to
Speaker 7: see this video. This woman is dead. She's falling off
Speaker 7: the biggest cliff in the world. You've watched the video,
Speaker 7: and she rolls down a hill. Yes, truly, the least
Speaker 7: scary thing that could happen to him person. She rolls
Speaker 7: off a hill onto a beach.
Speaker 2: And and and she's okay at the end.
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, she's like scraped up a little bit, but
Speaker 7: she probably fell what ten feet?
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean it was a hill and those are
Speaker 6: scary just in and of themselves.
Speaker 5: Sure was being serious. It wasn't a comedy cliff video.
Speaker 2: No, as far as I could tell him.
Speaker 7: Of course, as I do with everything on the internet,
Speaker 7: I didn't look at all into the actual thing. I
Speaker 7: just did a passing glance and made my assumptions and
Speaker 7: moved telling, Yeah, but it looked like she just fell
Speaker 7: off a small hill and was fine.
Speaker 6: But it was kind of wasn't the joke about how
Speaker 6: he was like, I was so upset and this was
Speaker 6: so difficult for me, And she's the one that fucking
Speaker 6: took the header off.
Speaker 7: The Yeah, of course he makes it his situation and
Speaker 7: when it was clearly her, I mean, despite the fact
Speaker 7: that it was basically nothing, she definitely was the one
Speaker 7: that got hurt. Yeah, but the hero husband was trying
Speaker 7: to use it as like this inspirational meme or some yeah,
Speaker 7: no one should be on the internet.
Speaker 1: We got to shut that shit down.
Speaker 2: We got to go back to our encyclopedia because you know, no,
Speaker 2: it was funk and wagonal.
Speaker 7: Anyway, I saw something about listing the cast members of
Speaker 7: SNL as Pokemon, and I thought I was truly ready
Speaker 7: to drive to whatever where I need, wherever I needed
Speaker 7: to in the Bay Area to just pull the plug.
Speaker 5: I've I've had it with Pokemon. Last night, I went
Speaker 5: to something called Night of Destruction at Irwin Dale Speedway,
Speaker 5: which has something called trailer racing, which ever since I
Speaker 5: heard of it, someone that lives in my new neighborhood
Speaker 5: is a mechanic and he needs like a tow truck driver,
Speaker 5: and I like him.
Speaker 2: We've talked at a bar and he.
Speaker 5: Drives in one of the events there and they there
Speaker 5: was a there was a Pikachu car in this way,
Speaker 5: and it's called trailer racing. They're all they're all towing
Speaker 5: boats or trailers. They put bats like this one in
Speaker 5: the middle of the road, and and and campers that
Speaker 5: have beds and clothes and they just smash into them.
Speaker 5: Is incredible, the funnest thing I've ever watched. It's on
Speaker 5: my Instagram. I took videos of it. I'm laughing in
Speaker 5: the background. Nothing has made me laugh harder.
Speaker 6: I mean again, I have to we have to do.
Speaker 5: It was so fun. They also played car soccer. There's
Speaker 5: a giant soccer ball made of a propane tank that
Speaker 5: weighs four hundred pounds, and these cars that were actually
Speaker 5: pretty good at stealing the ball from each other and
Speaker 5: slamming it into a goal made of highway dividers.
Speaker 2: It was so loud, and the.
Speaker 5: Officials were sheriff cars and they're driving around calling fouls
Speaker 5: and points. I don't follow soccer, but it's not car
Speaker 5: Soccer's pretty much the same rules.
Speaker 2: It was so you guys, Oh, Night of Destruction and.
Speaker 5: Windale Speedway was the And I had no idea it
Speaker 5: would make me laugh so much.
Speaker 2: The carnage.
Speaker 5: The sound of hearing a car smash into another car
Speaker 5: is jarring and usually a scary thing, but when it's
Speaker 5: happening repeatedly and you're seeing it from above, it makes
Speaker 5: you laugh.
Speaker 7: It's just body doesn't know how to react to this sort.
Speaker 2: Of yea, exactly. Yeah, it's like it's like getting the
Speaker 2: nervous giggles. I don't understand how that doesn't end into
Speaker 2: fatality every single time.
Speaker 1: Well that's the hope.
Speaker 7: Yeah, you've really gotten your money's work.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: The trailer racing cars would just stop because their engines
Speaker 5: would blow up. These are these are These are salvaged
Speaker 5: vehicles that are being brought to a level of performance
Speaker 5: that they've never experienced on probably no oil or bet
Speaker 5: and they so they'll just stop and then cars are
Speaker 5: supposed to not hit their acquaintance on the road. It's
Speaker 5: just it was really intense and I couldn't stop laughing.
Speaker 2: And there's a dog, sweet dog.
Speaker 1: I think that's about time. That's been an hour.
Speaker 2: We've been driving for an hour.
Speaker 1: Isn't that crazy?
Speaker 6: Ridgard?
Speaker 1: Do you have anything you want to plug?
Speaker 2: I don't have it. I mean, what do I have
Speaker 2: to plug? At this point?
Speaker 7: I feel I mean, I'm always happy to plug other
Speaker 7: things I want to plug. There's this compilation album I've
Speaker 7: been listening to called said about the Times, Oh seventies music.
Speaker 7: It feels like it's an alternate dimension of seventies hits. Yes,
Speaker 7: so beautiful. I want to recommend that the rest of
Speaker 7: who cares about me or what I'm doing. Everyone's on
Speaker 7: the internet at this point.
Speaker 5: Yes, if you want to go Google readers work, going
Speaker 5: to IMDV.
Speaker 2: He doesn't want to talk about it right now.
Speaker 1: There's some He's made some great sketches, great videos.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I want to recommend?
Speaker 7: But I'm going to promote that is not currently on
Speaker 7: the internet, but in the future. Yes, my friend Langan
Speaker 7: and I have made a short film called A Night
Speaker 7: at the Horse Symphony.
Speaker 2: It has taken a thousand years to make.
Speaker 7: When it's done, I want people to watch this video.
Speaker 2: Yes, did you say horror or horse? A Night at
Speaker 2: the Horse Symphony?
Speaker 1: I can't wait.
Speaker 7: It's so I can't believe it's nearly done, has taken
Speaker 7: so long. So when it does come out, I please
Speaker 7: people watch it. It's going to be such an alienating film.
Speaker 7: We made it entirely for ourselves, so people will probably
Speaker 7: hate it. Okay, I'm going to do some self promotion here,
Speaker 7: but I also want to say sad about the times.
Speaker 2: Get that.
Speaker 7: It's made by this guy named Mikey Young. He's an Australian.
Speaker 7: He's in a bunch of wonderful bands and he has
Speaker 7: excellent taste.
Speaker 2: Oh oh, I have to listen to that. Oh you'll
Speaker 2: love it. That sounds like it's in my alley too.
Speaker 7: And what about that title for a complimlation album?
Speaker 2: It's beautiful, so accurate.
Speaker 1: Well, thank you so much for being arguing. Today was
Speaker 1: a goddamn.
Speaker 2: Delight, Always a delight. Always good to see you caring.
Speaker 1: Good to see you too, Chris, you've.
Speaker 2: Been listening to Do you need a ride in?
Speaker 1: They?
Speaker 2: Are?
Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 3: Either way, we want to be there. Doesn't matter how
Speaker 3: much baggage you claim. You give us time and date,
Speaker 3: termino and gay, we.
Speaker 4: Want to send you off InStyle. We wanna welcome you
Speaker 4: back home. Tell us all about it.
Speaker 1: We scared her?
Speaker 6: Was it fine, Malborn?
Speaker 2: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you mean.
Speaker 2: With Karen and Cress m h