1 00:00:05,160 --> 00:00:08,080 Speaker 1: Hey, this is Danny and Samantha and welcome to Stephane 2 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:18,959 Speaker 1: never told your production of I Heart Radio. So through 3 00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:22,200 Speaker 1: a series of past episodes, we've talked about our experiences 4 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 1: with slumber parties. We also talked about a slasher movie 5 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:30,360 Speaker 1: around slumber parties, um kind of the sexualization around slumber parties. 6 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:33,159 Speaker 1: But what I wanted to bring up for this classic 7 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 1: episode on the history of sumbler parties is I gifted 8 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 1: you with a bunch of board games that we talked 9 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:48,199 Speaker 1: about on our like girl board Games episode as we 10 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:53,040 Speaker 1: called it. And we were having kind of you know, 11 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:58,680 Speaker 1: hopefully you're safe get together with friends, going away party 12 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:01,160 Speaker 1: for somebody, and we were playing games and we got 13 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:04,640 Speaker 1: these games ended up coming out yes, and people were 14 00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: reading the descriptions of boyfriends you could obtain in these 15 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:14,119 Speaker 1: games or items that you were trying to seek out 16 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:18,400 Speaker 1: in these games. And through all of this, I realized 17 00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:20,640 Speaker 1: that I did a terrible thing and gave you a 18 00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:25,399 Speaker 1: gift that required other gifts. Because there was a tape player, 19 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:29,960 Speaker 1: there was a cassette tape. I definitely don't have a 20 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:32,000 Speaker 1: cassette tape player. I don't know if I've had one, 21 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,440 Speaker 1: actually know I think I had one up until two 22 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 1: thousand four because my CD player was a CD cassette. Yes, yes, 23 00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:46,319 Speaker 1: I remember those. Well. I'm looking to fix this, Samantha, 24 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:52,800 Speaker 1: because I really really hearing everybody talked about it, and 25 00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:56,000 Speaker 1: especially like the dudes in the group, but also the women. 26 00:01:57,480 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 1: I gotta play these games, right, I say, Ease was 27 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:05,000 Speaker 1: a part of this group. You know, E's female first, 28 00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:10,760 Speaker 1: uh and she her actually like dialogue and giving us 29 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:13,480 Speaker 1: a commentary on all the games was also a delight, 30 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 1: as well as having people like my nemesis been bolen 31 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:20,360 Speaker 1: for my partner going through these games trying to figure 32 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:24,360 Speaker 1: out what they were themselves was quite a delight. It was. 33 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,160 Speaker 1: It was really fun. We didn't even play the games, 34 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:32,800 Speaker 1: but no, yes, and these are kind of a big 35 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:37,880 Speaker 1: part I feel like to my thumber party. Experience are 36 00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:41,960 Speaker 1: are hanging out with a group of girls, especially Experience, 37 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,000 Speaker 1: and I really I want to play that mom Madness game. 38 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,679 Speaker 1: I gotta know what that's about to. Yeah, So we're 39 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,399 Speaker 1: actually hoping to do like maybe a mini series where 40 00:02:49,440 --> 00:02:51,920 Speaker 1: we play these games and we invite other people to 41 00:02:51,919 --> 00:02:54,280 Speaker 1: play with us, which I think will be really fun. 42 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:57,600 Speaker 1: We want to have some of our male counterparts come 43 00:02:57,639 --> 00:03:00,680 Speaker 1: and play, and because they missed out, feel like many 44 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:03,399 Speaker 1: of them missed out on their childhood, not being allowed 45 00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:09,359 Speaker 1: by society to enjoy these games, these games where you've 46 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 1: got to find out boyfriend and you've gotta spend your 47 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:18,040 Speaker 1: credit card. I'm excited. I'm excited. But in the meantime, 48 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 1: please enjoy this classic episode on slumber parties. Welcome to 49 00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:33,840 Speaker 1: Stuff Mom Never told You from how stup works dot com. Hello, 50 00:03:33,919 --> 00:03:37,119 Speaker 1: and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen and I'm Caroline. 51 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:41,200 Speaker 1: Or should I have said welcome to our slumba party? 52 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:46,520 Speaker 1: Actually no, well yeah, because we're awake. Were there? We 53 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 1: are in sleeping bags, but we're not sleeping. I'm wearing 54 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 1: a high necked nightgown and there's popcorn a popping And 55 00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:58,880 Speaker 1: to kick things off, I have a slumber party story. 56 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:03,200 Speaker 1: Please hit me. Well, it has to do with losing 57 00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:06,920 Speaker 1: a tooth. I have there one of my front teeth, 58 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: the one right next to the second one over. It 59 00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:12,920 Speaker 1: really makes note sense. I'm going to post a picture 60 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:16,200 Speaker 1: of myself with a giant arrow pointing to the tooth 61 00:04:16,240 --> 00:04:23,039 Speaker 1: in question. Uh, it's actually a fake tooth. Yeah, you 62 00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,520 Speaker 1: heard it here first folks, Christian's got a fake tooth 63 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,960 Speaker 1: Because I was at a slumber party when I was 64 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:33,760 Speaker 1: probably twelve eleven or twelve years old, and we were 65 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:36,680 Speaker 1: all in the living room and my sleeping bag was 66 00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:40,240 Speaker 1: next to the fireplace. There was some rough housing going 67 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:42,400 Speaker 1: on because it was late at night and we'd probably 68 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:48,000 Speaker 1: had too many marshmallows, and someone knocked over the fire 69 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:53,599 Speaker 1: poker and it landed on It landed on my face, 70 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:56,360 Speaker 1: and it chipped off half my tooth, and it really 71 00:04:56,360 --> 00:04:59,760 Speaker 1: didn't I don't remember hurting all that badly. I remember 72 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: like laughing uncontrollably because of all this silliness going on, 73 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:07,720 Speaker 1: seeing in slow motion of fire poker coming towards my 74 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,800 Speaker 1: face and then so and being like are you okay, 75 00:05:10,880 --> 00:05:12,760 Speaker 1: and being like, yeah, I'm totally. Oh my god, my 76 00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:18,200 Speaker 1: tooth is gone. So and that in our podcast on 77 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:21,520 Speaker 1: slumber party. So anyone out there listening who might have 78 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:24,520 Speaker 1: a slumber party coming up for whatever reason, steer clear 79 00:05:24,640 --> 00:05:28,760 Speaker 1: of the fireplace or any big blunt objects that could 80 00:05:28,800 --> 00:05:32,160 Speaker 1: knock a child in the face. Yeah. When I when people, 81 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:33,960 Speaker 1: when I tell people about my tooth, I have to 82 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:35,520 Speaker 1: tell the whole story because if I say it got 83 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 1: knocked out with a fire poker. It doesn't go over 84 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:42,000 Speaker 1: quite as well. And then I hit him back with 85 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:46,240 Speaker 1: a shovel. Um. Yeah, I I I myself was not 86 00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 1: a very good sleeper over or um. Slumber parties were 87 00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:52,719 Speaker 1: better for me because I kind of knew that I 88 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:54,880 Speaker 1: had to suck it up and and just even if 89 00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:56,839 Speaker 1: I didn't sleep all night, I just had to lie 90 00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:59,960 Speaker 1: there and not be the kid that went home. Sleep 91 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,440 Speaker 1: Overs were a lot more difficult for me. I think 92 00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:05,280 Speaker 1: maybe I had, oh, I don't know, like a handful 93 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:07,599 Speaker 1: of successful ones out of the mini that I went to, 94 00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:11,719 Speaker 1: because as as I am now, I was a little 95 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:15,960 Speaker 1: kind of anxiety ridden sleeper. I I I needed the 96 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:18,560 Speaker 1: comfort of my own bed, my own space. I had 97 00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:21,719 Speaker 1: to have the fan running. I didn't like being in 98 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:26,599 Speaker 1: different environments that were unfamiliar and smelled weird. God, some 99 00:06:26,680 --> 00:06:30,000 Speaker 1: people's houses smell weird, and so I would often end 100 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,720 Speaker 1: up calling my mother to come get me at like 101 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:34,400 Speaker 1: tenor eleven and night. Oh you were one of those kids, 102 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:40,600 Speaker 1: I was, well, you're distinguishing between sleepover versus slumber party. 103 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:44,200 Speaker 1: How would you well? Slumber party I think of as 104 00:06:44,279 --> 00:06:47,280 Speaker 1: like birthday party or special event. Where there's like, you know, 105 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:50,919 Speaker 1: a handful of girls, ten girls. However, many um sleepover 106 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,840 Speaker 1: I think of just as like your friend is inviting 107 00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:54,640 Speaker 1: you to come over on a Saturday, Friday night or 108 00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:57,080 Speaker 1: Saturday night, and then you go home in the morning. 109 00:06:57,880 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: But I usually went home at nights. Yeah, I don't. 110 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:05,800 Speaker 1: I don't know if it was because of the homeschooling aspect, 111 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 1: but sleepovers and slumber parties like I lived for them. 112 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:15,840 Speaker 1: If I could have been a professional sleepover I would 113 00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:19,040 Speaker 1: have done it because I loved. One thing that I 114 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:23,480 Speaker 1: really enjoyed about sleeping over kids houses was the next 115 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:28,040 Speaker 1: morning the cereal because my mom Wis bought super healthy cereals, 116 00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:30,960 Speaker 1: so we had it was a staple of corn flakes, 117 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:33,960 Speaker 1: Raisin brand and puffed wheat at my house. But you 118 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:36,280 Speaker 1: go over to other kids houses, they got to those 119 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:39,760 Speaker 1: corn pops, Lucky charms, that's loops and you kidding me? 120 00:07:39,920 --> 00:07:42,080 Speaker 1: Those are the only times that I would have cereal seconds. 121 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,600 Speaker 1: And then you drink the multicolored milk yes, and you're like, god, 122 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:49,960 Speaker 1: the rules. Well, so we we do have a point. 123 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,360 Speaker 1: There is more to this podcast than just us telling stories, 124 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:54,200 Speaker 1: although I don't think there should be well, I mean, 125 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:58,120 Speaker 1: we're making the point that sleepovers are a pretty they're 126 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:04,320 Speaker 1: pretty big milestones in childhood socialization, at least in the US, 127 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,280 Speaker 1: and I would say in Canada as well. It's a 128 00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:11,000 Speaker 1: very uh, USA centric kind of phenomenon that I didn't realize. 129 00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:14,000 Speaker 1: I didn't realize that either. Um, but yeah, it is 130 00:08:14,040 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 1: definitely an essential part of childhood. And this is according 131 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:20,880 Speaker 1: to pediatrician Perry Class, who was quoted in The New 132 00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:24,920 Speaker 1: York Times back in February, who said that it's definitely 133 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:28,560 Speaker 1: essential for both boys and girls. And dr Class quotes 134 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:31,840 Speaker 1: Paula Fass, who is a history professor at u C. Berkeley, 135 00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 1: who said that sleepovers are a phenomenon of the suburbs 136 00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:38,280 Speaker 1: and took off in the fifties and sixties, and by 137 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:42,040 Speaker 1: the eighties they had become a right, not a privilege. Well, yeah, 138 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:45,640 Speaker 1: and then with the eighties it also became well, even 139 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:48,760 Speaker 1: going back to the fifties and sixties, it was summer 140 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:53,080 Speaker 1: parties were often a theme in like teen teeny bop movies, 141 00:08:54,160 --> 00:09:00,000 Speaker 1: Sandard d Pillow Fights, what not. But of course, sleepovers, 142 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:04,200 Speaker 1: f you are a parent are not necessarily just the 143 00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 1: prospect of gorging on pizza and pillow fights. There are 144 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:11,480 Speaker 1: also issues that come up, like a separation, anxiety, the 145 00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:13,920 Speaker 1: whole thing. You know that you were talking about Caroline, 146 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:17,560 Speaker 1: of sleeping in a strange place, playing by another family's rules, 147 00:09:17,679 --> 00:09:22,800 Speaker 1: bullying bed, wedding. Um. This can be maybe there might 148 00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:24,560 Speaker 1: be a lot of fear in it, for more for 149 00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:27,560 Speaker 1: the parent than for the child. Of sleeping in an 150 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,600 Speaker 1: unknown place for the first time. Yeah, and you should 151 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 1: probably if your child is one who might have anxiety 152 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:38,040 Speaker 1: issues or sleep issues or anything, you probably should warn 153 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:42,080 Speaker 1: the hosting parents because you know, you don't want your 154 00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:43,720 Speaker 1: kid to go wake the parents up in the middle 155 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,839 Speaker 1: of the night or have a big to do like oh, 156 00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,880 Speaker 1: I don't know when the child has to call her 157 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:51,080 Speaker 1: mommy to come get her um and they stay. In 158 00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:53,920 Speaker 1: this New York Times article that especially you should warn 159 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:56,559 Speaker 1: the parents, especially if your kid has night terrors or sleepwalks, 160 00:09:57,080 --> 00:09:59,840 Speaker 1: because these things are more likely to happen in strange 161 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:03,760 Speaker 1: environments or when the kid is sleep deprived, so you know, 162 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:06,480 Speaker 1: night terrors that could be terrifying for the hosting parents 163 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:10,120 Speaker 1: and the children in the room as well. Do you 164 00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 1: speak from experience? No, my friend, my friend, A couple 165 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:17,920 Speaker 1: of friends actually have night terrors still and it is terrifying. 166 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:20,320 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I can, I can imagine we should do 167 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:24,360 Speaker 1: an episode on night terrors. Now. While it would be 168 00:10:24,559 --> 00:10:27,920 Speaker 1: so much fun for us to continue on with the 169 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:31,680 Speaker 1: podcast and just talk share sleepover and slumber party stories 170 00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:36,640 Speaker 1: because there are so many, let's actually be more practical 171 00:10:36,640 --> 00:10:41,240 Speaker 1: about this and talk about from a parental perspective of 172 00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:46,679 Speaker 1: how to tackle a sleepover. The Chicago Tribune actually published 173 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:51,320 Speaker 1: an entire guide to sleepovers because they can be especially 174 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:54,439 Speaker 1: if the kids are a little bit younger, if there 175 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,440 Speaker 1: is still in that age range, um, maybe eight, when 176 00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:03,000 Speaker 1: sleepovers might be a new thing. If you're a parent 177 00:11:03,040 --> 00:11:06,480 Speaker 1: and you're hosting a sleepover, it's actually a decent amount 178 00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:08,760 Speaker 1: of work. And the first question, obviously you've got to 179 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:13,960 Speaker 1: ask is is your child ready to play host? Yeah, well, 180 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:18,800 Speaker 1: to play host or to go away to someone's smelly house, 181 00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:22,160 Speaker 1: Because you might know that your child is not emotionally 182 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,520 Speaker 1: or anxiety wise ready to go to somebody else's house 183 00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:27,520 Speaker 1: and sleep in a sleeping bag on the floor next 184 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:31,240 Speaker 1: to the fire poker. Um, but your child might be adamant, 185 00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:32,720 Speaker 1: you know, like no, I'm ready, I want to go 186 00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:36,319 Speaker 1: play with the other kids. Um. A lot of recommendations 187 00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:40,760 Speaker 1: online have to do with developing fun sounding alternatives like 188 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:43,480 Speaker 1: why don't you go to your cousin Jimmy's house instead? 189 00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:46,320 Speaker 1: It's more of a low pressure environment. Yeah, it's often 190 00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:50,200 Speaker 1: recommended testing out the sleeping away from home in a 191 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,959 Speaker 1: family environment, going over to Grandma and Grandpa's house, going 192 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,640 Speaker 1: over to a cousin, or having a cousin over. So 193 00:11:56,679 --> 00:11:59,760 Speaker 1: it's a little bit of a safer environment. And the 194 00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:04,360 Speaker 1: age that is often sided is eight to nine years old. Um. 195 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:07,720 Speaker 1: And then the question is too of how many guests 196 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,720 Speaker 1: do you have at a sleepover? Because I mean I 197 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,840 Speaker 1: remember going to the big Ones and they could get 198 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:15,800 Speaker 1: massively out of hand because you always have a couple 199 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:20,000 Speaker 1: of troublemakers, and then it just the trouble just spread 200 00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:22,920 Speaker 1: and then like just like in The Lord of the Flies, 201 00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:25,960 Speaker 1: I mean, you start to get like a leader and 202 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:29,720 Speaker 1: then groups splinter and the next thing you know, you're 203 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:32,160 Speaker 1: like fighting with sticks on a beach. It's crazy, And 204 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:35,280 Speaker 1: next thing you know, you lose a tooth. What I 205 00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 1: lose the tooth? Yeah. The Chicago Tribune and The Guardian 206 00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:42,360 Speaker 1: both have some recommendations, and I had never really, I 207 00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,080 Speaker 1: guess I never knew this. I never really thought about 208 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:46,600 Speaker 1: how many children you should have, just not the whole class, 209 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:49,800 Speaker 1: I guess. But Chicago Tribune recommends that the younger the kid, 210 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 1: the smaller the group. That makes sense, it's less overwhelming. 211 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 1: The Guardian, on the other hand, gets a little more 212 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:58,000 Speaker 1: specific and says that for a slumber party, you want 213 00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:00,960 Speaker 1: to invite the same number of guests as your child's age, 214 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,680 Speaker 1: whereas for a sleepover the number is half that I've 215 00:13:03,679 --> 00:13:06,480 Speaker 1: never heard of that I don't I don't know what 216 00:13:06,520 --> 00:13:10,560 Speaker 1: to tell you. I say, you know, invite what seems manageable. Um. 217 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:13,680 Speaker 1: And also don't invite kids that you don't know. Well, 218 00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:16,520 Speaker 1: you know, you don't have to invite everybody to the 219 00:13:16,559 --> 00:13:21,319 Speaker 1: sleepover because again, with these kinds of environments you a 220 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:25,240 Speaker 1: child has to get along with the the family rules 221 00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:27,760 Speaker 1: in place. UM. I remember that was that was one 222 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:31,719 Speaker 1: of the toughest negotiations of sleepovers and slumber parties was 223 00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:35,160 Speaker 1: having to figure out the family dynamics like you can't 224 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:38,360 Speaker 1: go in the room with the white sofa yea, or 225 00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:41,000 Speaker 1: or if you have free reign to do anything? You know, 226 00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:43,080 Speaker 1: if there was if I went over to a friend's 227 00:13:43,080 --> 00:13:47,360 Speaker 1: house who had fewer parental restrictions in my home might 228 00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,319 Speaker 1: have had. It would take me a little while to 229 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:51,720 Speaker 1: be like, oh, oh, I can do this. I can't 230 00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:55,440 Speaker 1: eat all this cereal. Excellent, We'll give me all the 231 00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 1: cereal I want. Um. They do recommend uh finding off 232 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:01,600 Speaker 1: for them, because I don't know. A gang of board 233 00:14:01,679 --> 00:14:04,520 Speaker 1: children sounds terrifying to me. So you have to decide 234 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,600 Speaker 1: do you want planned events and group activities or do 235 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,000 Speaker 1: you just want to tell them that they have to 236 00:14:08,080 --> 00:14:10,240 Speaker 1: entertain themselves. Are you just gonna like lock them in 237 00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:13,480 Speaker 1: the playroom and just hope for the best. I don't know. 238 00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:17,600 Speaker 1: That all sounds scary to me. There's also ideas about 239 00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 1: being careful to avoid hurt feelings, because yeah, that it 240 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,440 Speaker 1: can happen a lot of times when you take a 241 00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:28,400 Speaker 1: group of kids, you get them kind of tired and 242 00:14:28,400 --> 00:14:31,960 Speaker 1: and also sped up on sugar. That someone's going to 243 00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:35,280 Speaker 1: start crying. Um, And you set a rule at the 244 00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:40,200 Speaker 1: beginning not to exclude anybody. Also, for older kids, no 245 00:14:40,440 --> 00:14:44,920 Speaker 1: cellular telephones, because then you might text people about other people, 246 00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:48,200 Speaker 1: and there could be texting behind backs and whatnot. Yeah, 247 00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:51,160 Speaker 1: and that's so weird. That was certainly not um a 248 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:54,520 Speaker 1: rule when yeah, well we did. We did have phone 249 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:58,120 Speaker 1: issues at slumber parties or sleepovers that I had, like 250 00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:00,240 Speaker 1: you know where you do the thing where it's a 251 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:02,440 Speaker 1: three way call and the other person doesn't know the 252 00:15:02,480 --> 00:15:06,040 Speaker 1: other person's listening. Oh yeah, those are the mean games 253 00:15:06,160 --> 00:15:08,480 Speaker 1: you played, the mean game. No, I was just well, 254 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 1: it was never. It was never calling somebody and finding 255 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 1: out what somebody thought. It was usually like a boy like, hey, Nathan, 256 00:15:15,640 --> 00:15:17,280 Speaker 1: you know so and so has a crush on you. 257 00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:23,440 Speaker 1: What do you think usually likes and then giggling and 258 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:26,040 Speaker 1: hang up. Yeah, or the oven No, the no crank 259 00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:31,280 Speaker 1: call policy. But what about the issue of speaking of 260 00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:36,080 Speaker 1: calling the boys if you were at a girl's slumber party. 261 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:41,520 Speaker 1: What about the issue of co ed sleepovers? Because this 262 00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,680 Speaker 1: is something that has come up. It was covered recently 263 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,800 Speaker 1: in the New York Times, and they have also been 264 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:52,640 Speaker 1: other articles and considerations about coed sleepovers because especially for 265 00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:56,720 Speaker 1: the UM you know kids in their early teen years, 266 00:15:57,320 --> 00:15:59,960 Speaker 1: they want to be able to have boys and girls 267 00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:03,080 Speaker 1: stay the night together, to which most parents would probably 268 00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:09,720 Speaker 1: be like no or no, no, definitely not. Uh actually 269 00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:12,320 Speaker 1: went to a I wouldn't call it a slumber party. 270 00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: It was like the safe house because I think it 271 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:19,200 Speaker 1: was after homecoming and prom my senior year of high school. 272 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:23,120 Speaker 1: This family who had a farm in Marietta invited all 273 00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:25,760 Speaker 1: of the kids back because it was like they kind 274 00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 1: of had the wink, hush hush attitude of like, well, 275 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,440 Speaker 1: you're probably gonna sneak alcohol, and we'd rather you all 276 00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:34,760 Speaker 1: be in the same place, roaming free on a farm 277 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:38,160 Speaker 1: than trying to drive somewhere. Well that's so, but that's 278 00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:43,400 Speaker 1: different than like actually hosting a sleepover. Yeah, all, yeah, 279 00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 1: there was. There was co ed sleeping, that's for sure. 280 00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: Um So, anyway, moving on, but that's a whole But 281 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:54,440 Speaker 1: that's a whole fear with these cod sleepovers is that naturally, 282 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,920 Speaker 1: at some point something's gonna happen. Are you a terrible 283 00:16:56,960 --> 00:17:01,840 Speaker 1: parent if you if you are down with doing this, well, 284 00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:04,320 Speaker 1: I guess it depends on what country you're in. Frankly, 285 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,399 Speaker 1: because Amy Shelleh, who's a sociology professor at UMAs Amhurst, 286 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 1: did a study of teen sex and family life in 287 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:15,080 Speaker 1: the US and the Netherlands and surprise, surprise, there is uh, 288 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,920 Speaker 1: there's a lot of differences. Um She found that here 289 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,679 Speaker 1: teens are helpless victims beset by raging hormones. That's our 290 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:23,879 Speaker 1: perception of our teens. We have to keep them safe 291 00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:29,280 Speaker 1: from themselves. In the Netherlands, parents interviewed regard teens more 292 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,639 Speaker 1: as capable of falling in love and of reasonably assessing 293 00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:35,280 Speaker 1: their own readiness for sex. I haven't a think that 294 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,880 Speaker 1: kind of falls somewhere in between maybe, but she said. 295 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:40,879 Speaker 1: She said in talking to all these parents in the 296 00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:45,920 Speaker 1: Netherlands that normalizing ideas about teenage sex actually allows parents 297 00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:48,800 Speaker 1: to exert more control because it kind of opens the 298 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,240 Speaker 1: way for dialogue. Well, yeah, and this is one of 299 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:55,160 Speaker 1: the context of allowing like a code sleepover in terms 300 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:58,600 Speaker 1: of one like a like like my definition of a 301 00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:01,439 Speaker 1: sleepover versus a slumber party. Yeah, like an adult an 302 00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:05,440 Speaker 1: adult sleepover rather than like having a group of friends. 303 00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:09,600 Speaker 1: Which Education dot Com talked to psychologists and parenting author 304 00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:13,440 Speaker 1: Linda Sona about this and because she was saying that 305 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:17,160 Speaker 1: more parents are are having to deal with these requests 306 00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:21,439 Speaker 1: for co ed slimmer parties and um. She says that 307 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,919 Speaker 1: many teens have deep platonic friendships with members of the 308 00:18:25,920 --> 00:18:28,560 Speaker 1: opposite sex and honestly might just want to hang out, 309 00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: but at some point, but they often involve sexual activity, 310 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:36,000 Speaker 1: whether planned or not. But if you are a parent 311 00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:39,760 Speaker 1: and you decide that that is okay, you obviously need 312 00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:42,560 Speaker 1: to talk to the parents of the other kids to 313 00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,399 Speaker 1: make sure that they know what's going on, be clear 314 00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:49,639 Speaker 1: about rules, provide separate sleeping areas, and set a party perimeter, essentially, like, 315 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:52,040 Speaker 1: once you're in the house, you're not going to leave 316 00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:55,719 Speaker 1: the house. Personally, it sounds like a giant heic trying 317 00:18:55,760 --> 00:19:02,919 Speaker 1: to facilitate a completely PG teenage coed sleepover. But it 318 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:07,160 Speaker 1: can be done, I'm sure. But maybe a life would 319 00:19:07,359 --> 00:19:10,680 Speaker 1: be just easier for parents with this whole sleepover thing 320 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:14,760 Speaker 1: if it wasn't such an ingrained part of American culture. 321 00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:20,760 Speaker 1: Because I did not know that it was so us specific. 322 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:23,400 Speaker 1: I didn't either. I just figured it was a rite 323 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:28,399 Speaker 1: of passage for all children. The world over has a 324 00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:32,080 Speaker 1: global slumber parties. That sounds really fun. That's something that 325 00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:35,479 Speaker 1: should happen on the internet. The Internet. Um yeah. Carmen 326 00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:39,440 Speaker 1: Yuri in The New Jersey Star Ledger wrote a column 327 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:43,119 Speaker 1: about her attitude about sleepovers, both when she was a 328 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:47,080 Speaker 1: child and now when she's a mom to daughters because 329 00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:48,560 Speaker 1: a lot of people argue that it is a rite 330 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,000 Speaker 1: of passage. It's very common, no big deal. It can 331 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,600 Speaker 1: be a bonding tool for kids and their friends. She 332 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:56,399 Speaker 1: disagrees she was not allowed to sleep over at friends 333 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:59,840 Speaker 1: houses as a child, and his instituted the same rule 334 00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:02,680 Speaker 1: for her daughter, and her reasoning, I find it a 335 00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:06,160 Speaker 1: little hard to get behind other than there are such 336 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:10,399 Speaker 1: cultural differences. She said that because she perceived these slumber 337 00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:12,640 Speaker 1: parties to be so cool and so normal and wanted 338 00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:16,280 Speaker 1: to do him um, her Cuban mother was like, no, 339 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,919 Speaker 1: I'm not letting you do this. Why would I let 340 00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:20,840 Speaker 1: you go sleep away at some stranger's house? And so 341 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,959 Speaker 1: she ends up bullying her mom into letting her go 342 00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:27,320 Speaker 1: on the slumber party and says she felt scarred for 343 00:20:27,359 --> 00:20:29,359 Speaker 1: the rest of her life. That she made her mom cry. 344 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:33,440 Speaker 1: Oh that that just sounds well yeah, well so all 345 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:36,560 Speaker 1: because of that, Because of her experience, she's not gonna 346 00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,480 Speaker 1: let her kids do it. She says. The way I 347 00:20:38,520 --> 00:20:40,320 Speaker 1: see it, my kids may miss out on a little 348 00:20:40,359 --> 00:20:43,560 Speaker 1: fun at sleepovers, but they won't be permanently scarred in 349 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,520 Speaker 1: the future like me. They may sympathize with their mother. Well, 350 00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,080 Speaker 1: we should point out that that her mom or Cuban 351 00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,080 Speaker 1: mom did allow her to have friends sleep over at 352 00:20:52,119 --> 00:20:55,520 Speaker 1: her house. It just wasn't like culturally, it did not 353 00:20:55,680 --> 00:21:00,639 Speaker 1: make sense that she would need to sleep somewhere else. 354 00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 1: It just seemed very foreign to them. And there were 355 00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:08,040 Speaker 1: um some other like parenting blogs that I ran across 356 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:13,159 Speaker 1: as while talking about Um. In some Muslim families, sleepovers 357 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:17,520 Speaker 1: are a no go. And also Amy Chiwa, who wrote 358 00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:20,600 Speaker 1: the Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother that got so 359 00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,520 Speaker 1: much attention a couple of years ago. UM. One of 360 00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,520 Speaker 1: the things that she talks about and all the strict 361 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,800 Speaker 1: rules that she imposes on her two daughters was that 362 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:33,880 Speaker 1: she refused to let them ever participate in sleepovers. Never 363 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:40,000 Speaker 1: ever um and uh Gil Sutherland in The Guardian and 364 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:43,680 Speaker 1: she grumbles that the slumber party has its origin in 365 00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:48,159 Speaker 1: quote that other great American tradition, the summer camp. And 366 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:50,040 Speaker 1: she goes on and on talking about like all these 367 00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 1: things that you now have to do because kids think 368 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:57,480 Speaker 1: it's cool to have these weird slumber parties and so 369 00:21:57,560 --> 00:22:00,040 Speaker 1: you have to you know, buy pizza and make a 370 00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:03,320 Speaker 1: mess and deal with or are they called wakeovers? Essentially 371 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,720 Speaker 1: like kids never get enough sleep if they have a 372 00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 1: sleepover go to a slumber party. So you need to 373 00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,800 Speaker 1: be prepared as a parent to deal with your junk 374 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:16,120 Speaker 1: food bloated, sleep deprived child. They say that who will 375 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:19,560 Speaker 1: probably be grumpy from a wakeover? Yeah? I mean I'm 376 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,440 Speaker 1: pretty grumpy one I don't get sleep. She also recommended 377 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:25,200 Speaker 1: food in boxes, like that's a cool thing for kids. 378 00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:27,840 Speaker 1: I yeah, I would. I still like food in boxes 379 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:33,280 Speaker 1: and sleeping bags boxed food. Um. I do think we 380 00:22:33,320 --> 00:22:35,639 Speaker 1: would be remiss not to mention a little bit of 381 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:39,600 Speaker 1: slumber party pop culture history, something that Kristen and I 382 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:43,399 Speaker 1: found that is amazing in the horrific sense of the 383 00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:48,800 Speaker 1: word um. In nineteen six, Mattel released Slumber Party Barbie. Now, 384 00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:52,040 Speaker 1: what could be wrong with slumber Party Barbie? She's so cute, 385 00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:55,280 Speaker 1: She's got slippers, right, it's great. Yeah, Well maybe it's 386 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:58,479 Speaker 1: because she comes with a scale that reads a hundred 387 00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:01,879 Speaker 1: and ten pounds and a book titled how to Lose Weight? 388 00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:05,400 Speaker 1: Can you tell me the sole contents of the Barbie 389 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:09,760 Speaker 1: book How to Lose Weight, don't eat, which defeats the 390 00:23:09,920 --> 00:23:13,439 Speaker 1: entire purpose of going to a slumber party. I know, 391 00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:16,040 Speaker 1: boxed foods. Yeah, what are younna do with all that 392 00:23:16,119 --> 00:23:20,720 Speaker 1: boxed foods? Yeah, speaking of Barbie, there was some analysis 393 00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:24,840 Speaker 1: on kind of how Barbie intersected with American culture, and 394 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:29,679 Speaker 1: they talked about how uh It's symbolized the slumber party 395 00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:33,520 Speaker 1: popularity um when not only did they release that nineteen 396 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:38,680 Speaker 1: six slumber party Barbie, but also in the original fashion 397 00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:45,680 Speaker 1: booklet from uh It featured Barbie dressed up in cute NightWare. 398 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:50,200 Speaker 1: So even back in the late fifties, slumber parties all 399 00:23:50,280 --> 00:23:54,120 Speaker 1: the rage, all the kids are doing it. Yeah, hopefully 400 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 1: people in the fifties and sixties eight though that's true. Yes, 401 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:00,879 Speaker 1: But then also with game, the things we haven't been 402 00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,000 Speaker 1: able to talk about with sleepovers. We could make this 403 00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:05,920 Speaker 1: like an eight part series really, because there are things 404 00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:08,680 Speaker 1: like Weuiji board the whole light is a feather stiff 405 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 1: as a board. Truth or dare I was always I'm 406 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,720 Speaker 1: still a truth or dare Wheenie because I'm like, well, 407 00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:16,359 Speaker 1: I don't want to really tell you the truth about something, 408 00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:18,879 Speaker 1: but I also don't want to go like run naked 409 00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:20,639 Speaker 1: through the sprinkler in the backyard at night at the 410 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:22,480 Speaker 1: neighbor's house, you know, like I was. I was kind 411 00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:24,520 Speaker 1: of a pansy about that. Yeah, that was when I 412 00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:28,160 Speaker 1: saw my first mooning was during a slumber party, truth 413 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:30,520 Speaker 1: or dare. I was like, Wow, that's your that's the butt, 414 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:33,679 Speaker 1: that's your bottom. And then of course there are the 415 00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:36,119 Speaker 1: pranks your friends fall asleep. You don't want to be 416 00:24:36,160 --> 00:24:37,639 Speaker 1: the first one to sleep because you might end up 417 00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 1: with shaving cream on your face, or you might attempt 418 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 1: to get your friends to pet themselves if I put 419 00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:46,080 Speaker 1: in your hands in warm water. And then yeah, those 420 00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:49,240 Speaker 1: like a whole bullying games where I don't know that 421 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:50,760 Speaker 1: there's a name for it, but it's where you have 422 00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:53,520 Speaker 1: like one friend hide under the bed so they the 423 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:55,959 Speaker 1: other person thinks that she's gone, and then you're like, 424 00:24:56,400 --> 00:25:00,159 Speaker 1: what do you think about Caroline? And then she is 425 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:05,800 Speaker 1: a glowing report you stick out two thumbs way up 426 00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:09,399 Speaker 1: from out from under the bed. Um. Yeah. Also, uh 427 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:12,280 Speaker 1: so Girlhood in America, because I do feel like slumber 428 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:16,639 Speaker 1: parties especially are um a little more associated with girlhood 429 00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:19,360 Speaker 1: than boyhood of all. And I know boys have slumber 430 00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:22,240 Speaker 1: parties and and all of that. But according to the 431 00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:25,639 Speaker 1: book Girlhood in America, they say the research shows that 432 00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:30,040 Speaker 1: even such cultural practices as slumber parties can be transformative, 433 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:32,840 Speaker 1: at least for a night, because it is the first 434 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:37,520 Speaker 1: time that you are completely away from UH parental authority. 435 00:25:37,600 --> 00:25:40,600 Speaker 1: You don't know teachers are around. It's just you and 436 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:46,080 Speaker 1: your peers all night with a sugar rush and yeah, 437 00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:48,840 Speaker 1: and you have to like work out all these kind 438 00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:51,679 Speaker 1: of like negotiations of being in a new space and 439 00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,800 Speaker 1: you have to watch what's that movie Wild Hearts Can't 440 00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,840 Speaker 1: Be Broken? Yep, yep, yep. Or if you're like me, 441 00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:01,000 Speaker 1: you would go over to your friend's house and she 442 00:26:01,040 --> 00:26:03,840 Speaker 1: would just pull out one of her mom's UH tapes 443 00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 1: video cassettes from the shelf and it would be Silence 444 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:12,040 Speaker 1: of the Lands. God, is it any wonder? But I 445 00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:15,760 Speaker 1: hated slumber parties, man, Yeah, I do feel like there's 446 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:18,560 Speaker 1: a lot of a lot of boundary testing bands up 447 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:22,240 Speaker 1: happening at slumber parties because all of a sudden, you're 448 00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,919 Speaker 1: all there together and you can get into cahoots and 449 00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:30,159 Speaker 1: hijinks can ensue. So, uh, that's what we got for 450 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:35,520 Speaker 1: sleepovers and slumber parties, essentially a lot of fun reminiscing. Yeah, 451 00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:38,080 Speaker 1: now I want to hear your slumber party stories. Parents 452 00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:42,719 Speaker 1: out there is the slumber party something that you fear 453 00:26:42,800 --> 00:26:45,320 Speaker 1: because you know, maybe your kids not ready. What what 454 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,639 Speaker 1: are the is it weird sending your child off for 455 00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:53,080 Speaker 1: the first time to a sleepover or hosting a sleepover? 456 00:26:53,240 --> 00:26:56,440 Speaker 1: You stay sane when you have like ten or fifteen 457 00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:59,399 Speaker 1: or twenty kids in your house? Probably wine lots of 458 00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:03,720 Speaker 1: ituld assume um and also, yeah, folks out there any 459 00:27:04,160 --> 00:27:07,399 Speaker 1: slumber party stories. Caroline and I have shared ours. We 460 00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:09,200 Speaker 1: would like to hear yours, and you can send them 461 00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:13,600 Speaker 1: to us at Mom's Stuff at Discovery dot com. And 462 00:27:13,640 --> 00:27:16,120 Speaker 1: we got a couple of letters here to share for 463 00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:23,679 Speaker 1: you as well. This one comes from Katie and she 464 00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,240 Speaker 1: wrote in a little while ago about our episode about 465 00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,359 Speaker 1: man flu and whether or not man flu is real. 466 00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:31,200 Speaker 1: And for those who have not listened to the episode 467 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,800 Speaker 1: on man flu, a man flu is this notion that 468 00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:41,639 Speaker 1: when men get colds they totally uh dramatize their symptoms 469 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:43,960 Speaker 1: and make a big to do about it, whereas women 470 00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:47,560 Speaker 1: are super tough when we get sick. So Katie writes, 471 00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,879 Speaker 1: I do believe that there is probably a connection between 472 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:53,320 Speaker 1: masculinity and the man flu, but I did not think 473 00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:56,440 Speaker 1: it has anything to do with the male sex. I'm 474 00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:58,960 Speaker 1: really only speaking from personal experience, but I have noticed 475 00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:01,760 Speaker 1: a definite pattern. All of the women I've dated have 476 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:04,439 Speaker 1: been very masculine in some way, to have been very 477 00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:07,760 Speaker 1: butch in appearance but very gender neutral in behavior. They 478 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:09,679 Speaker 1: both want to have children someday, and they would like 479 00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:13,240 Speaker 1: to carry a child if possible. One was very feminine 480 00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:16,520 Speaker 1: in appearance but very typically masculine in personality. She was 481 00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:19,200 Speaker 1: a lawyer who's very focused on career and monetary goals 482 00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:21,880 Speaker 1: and cringes at the thought of babies. All three would 483 00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:24,720 Speaker 1: describe themselves as more masculine than feminine. All three suffer 484 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:30,159 Speaker 1: from horrendous man flues. Once a year, for many years, 485 00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:32,879 Speaker 1: I would get very bad bronchitis, and every time I 486 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,359 Speaker 1: would keep chugging along subbornly until I ended up at 487 00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:37,920 Speaker 1: the doctor with a hundred and four degree fever hallucinating 488 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,800 Speaker 1: from lack of oxygen to my brain. These three women 489 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:44,360 Speaker 1: would get the sniffles, and this apparently signaled armageddon. I 490 00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,160 Speaker 1: try to respect that it truly does feel awful for them, 491 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:51,200 Speaker 1: but the whining gets very old. So there's a fun 492 00:28:51,200 --> 00:28:53,680 Speaker 1: observation from Katie. All Right, this is an interesting email 493 00:28:53,720 --> 00:28:58,560 Speaker 1: from Israel about our Smell podcast. He says, as a 494 00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:01,360 Speaker 1: blind guy, I've always been asked all kinds of questions. 495 00:29:01,480 --> 00:29:03,960 Speaker 1: Is you're hearing any better? Can you feel things better 496 00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,560 Speaker 1: than most people? Is your sense of smell like that 497 00:29:06,680 --> 00:29:08,920 Speaker 1: of a shark? And that's a reference? I don't get 498 00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:13,360 Speaker 1: the sharks smell? Yeah, man, sharks can smell blood from 499 00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:16,800 Speaker 1: a mile away? Okay, alright then, okay, glad that was 500 00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:21,120 Speaker 1: confirmed for me? I never okay anyway, yeah, no kidding. 501 00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:24,000 Speaker 1: Someone actually asked me that the shark thing, and of course, 502 00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:26,520 Speaker 1: since I have been gifted with an amazing sense of humor, 503 00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:29,680 Speaker 1: I responded, yes, absolutely, I could. I could smell you 504 00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:32,840 Speaker 1: coming a mile away. Immediately this person took off running, 505 00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:35,520 Speaker 1: came back and was literally bathed in perfume. I found 506 00:29:35,520 --> 00:29:38,280 Speaker 1: this absolutely hysterical. Sense. Of course, I was exaggerating with 507 00:29:38,280 --> 00:29:41,360 Speaker 1: my mile away comment, having said that I do tend 508 00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,360 Speaker 1: to be more sensitive to smells, and although I don't 509 00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:45,400 Speaker 1: pick them up a mile away, I do tend to 510 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:48,440 Speaker 1: notice things that most other people would just ignore. Listening 511 00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,760 Speaker 1: to your podcast on smells just made me wonder if, 512 00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:52,960 Speaker 1: in fact, there is any science linked to lack of 513 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:56,320 Speaker 1: sight and how strong my senses may or may not be. 514 00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:58,920 Speaker 1: I've always dismissed this and simply attributed it to the 515 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:01,200 Speaker 1: fact that since I can't see, my brain just tends 516 00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,800 Speaker 1: to pay more attention to the senses that do work. 517 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:07,440 Speaker 1: And then he adds, and just in case you might 518 00:30:07,480 --> 00:30:12,560 Speaker 1: be wondering, no, I don't smell. I would know, so 519 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:14,960 Speaker 1: thank you Israel, And now I know that sharks have 520 00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,360 Speaker 1: a good sense of smell. And Caroline, I apologize if 521 00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:20,360 Speaker 1: that came across in my tone as shark shaming. You 522 00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:24,400 Speaker 1: did not mean to. But also there was one bit 523 00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:27,240 Speaker 1: in this letter, the man Food letter from Katie that 524 00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:29,760 Speaker 1: was addressed to you, really that I didn't get to. 525 00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:33,760 Speaker 1: So Caroline, here you go. Okay, she says, Caroline. In 526 00:30:33,800 --> 00:30:37,000 Speaker 1: my house, we share our beer with one of the cats. 527 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:40,320 Speaker 1: I think this comes from uh something. There was an 528 00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:45,840 Speaker 1: episode we were talking about getting saliva from pets. Yeah, 529 00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:48,400 Speaker 1: something about you could get sick, and I was really 530 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 1: grossed out about maybe letting your pets lick you. Yeah, 531 00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:53,720 Speaker 1: it was something something some aversion to pets. I mean, 532 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,200 Speaker 1: I am grossed out about letting pets like you. But well, 533 00:30:56,240 --> 00:30:58,480 Speaker 1: listen to this. In Katie's house, she says, we share 534 00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:00,440 Speaker 1: a beer with one of the cats. The way I 535 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:02,480 Speaker 1: see it, their germs are everywhere, whether I knew it 536 00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:04,680 Speaker 1: or not, I'm sure I eat much worse by accident 537 00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:07,160 Speaker 1: every day. And it's just so much fun to watch 538 00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:10,760 Speaker 1: the cat drink beer before you get worried. She doesn't 539 00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:13,160 Speaker 1: get much, and every vet we have ever told about 540 00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:15,760 Speaker 1: it says something along the lines of cool, my cat 541 00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:20,760 Speaker 1: isn't nearly that awesome. So double thanks to Katie. I'm 542 00:31:20,840 --> 00:31:22,920 Speaker 1: learning all sorts of things today for that. And now 543 00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:26,760 Speaker 1: I'm gonna go look up videos of cats drinking beer responsibly. 544 00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:29,960 Speaker 1: So in the meantime, if you've got letters to send 545 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:32,520 Speaker 1: our way, mom Stuff at Discovery dot com is our 546 00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:35,520 Speaker 1: email address. You can also find us on Facebook and 547 00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:39,080 Speaker 1: follow us on Twitter at mom Stuff Podcasts, and we'd 548 00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:40,959 Speaker 1: love for you to head over to our blog as 549 00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:44,440 Speaker 1: well on Tumbler. It's stuff I've Never told you dot 550 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,960 Speaker 1: tumbler dot com. And if you'd like to get a 551 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:49,360 Speaker 1: little smarter during the week, you can head over to 552 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:56,360 Speaker 1: our website, it's how stuff works dot com for more 553 00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:59,280 Speaker 1: on this and thousands of other topics. How stuff works 554 00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:06,200 Speaker 1: dot com. Yeah, brought to you by the reinvented two 555 00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:08,719 Speaker 1: thousand twelve Camry. It's ready, Are you