Speaker 1: Hey, there're folks, welcome to I Do Part to, a
Speaker 1: one of a kind experiment in love and podcasting, and
Speaker 1: we are not here to help just any old body
Speaker 1: fine love. Oh no, bro, We are here specifically for
Speaker 1: certain folks, Yes, for folks.
Speaker 2: Who didn't get love right the first time, or maybe
Speaker 2: even the second or third time, just like us. We
Speaker 2: are two of your hosts for I Do Part two.
Speaker 1: I'm aye Robots, I'm TJ. Holmes, along with our fellow
Speaker 1: co hosts Jenna Kramer and Jenny Garth, as well as
Speaker 1: our celebrity mentors, we are going to give guidance based
Speaker 1: on all of our varying degrees of relationship experience.
Speaker 2: Experience you say, well, for us, that means two divorces each.
Speaker 2: So we are not here to sit on our pedestal
Speaker 2: and point fingers. Now, we encourage all of our listeners
Speaker 2: to call in right in with their stories we know
Speaker 2: we're not alone, and their hopes for getting love right
Speaker 2: the next time.
Speaker 1: And one of those folks we heard from is someone
Speaker 1: that maybe some of our listeners are even familiar with.
Speaker 1: But take a listen now to one other people who
Speaker 1: called in and say they need help looking for love.
Speaker 3: Hey, missus, Elizabeth Brown, And I was just listening to
Speaker 3: the podcast and my friend had told me that I
Speaker 3: should call in. So here I am. I'm forty four
Speaker 3: and three and a half years of worse. Her parents
Speaker 3: a beautiful six year old daughter together and they're the
Speaker 3: Nashville So anyway, anyway you can help, any advice would
Speaker 3: be well appreciated.
Speaker 2: Thanks, so sweet, so sweet, Elizabeth Brown. If that doesn't
Speaker 2: sound familiar, maybe remember her as Elizabeth kit Elizabeth Kit Brown.
Speaker 2: But Elizabeth is joining us now on the podcast, And honestly,
Speaker 2: we actually asked our producers, Elizabeth, whether or not you
Speaker 2: actually just called in or if there was some sort
Speaker 2: of a reach out to you, and know you genuinely
Speaker 2: called the podcast asking for help. And folks might know
Speaker 2: who you are because you were a contestant on The Bachelor,
Speaker 2: Yes a long.
Speaker 4: Time ago, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: And then season fourteen and then also so I know,
Speaker 2: Bachelor in Paradise, but you were on a show that
Speaker 2: predated that as well, correct, yeah, Pad, Bachelor season.
Speaker 1: Okay, remind us what Bachelor PAD was about.
Speaker 4: So it was more of a game show where you
Speaker 4: had a chance to win two hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: So you were looking for money, not love on that one.
Speaker 2: Yes, maybe a little bit of both win win win win. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but you did end up getting married to someone who
Speaker 2: also was in the franchise. He was on the Bachelorette,
Speaker 2: So you ended up not on the actual shows, you
Speaker 2: were on Finding Love, but in a way, because of
Speaker 2: the show, you found love. So tell us a little
Speaker 2: bit about what happened. We know you're divorced now, but
Speaker 2: tell us about the romance and then what happened.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so, coming off the shows, Ty was in La
Speaker 4: visiting and I met up with him and a bunch
Speaker 4: of the other bachelor people watching football, and I took
Speaker 4: Tim right away because he's tall and he's a country
Speaker 4: country boy, and there's that media attraction right after the show.
Speaker 4: But then we both got into your relationships and it
Speaker 4: was at the end of my to your relationship, and
Speaker 4: I changed my status on Facebook, and twelve minutes later
Speaker 4: he slid into my DMS and said, I think we.
Speaker 1: Need to talk. Tell minutes, Elizabeth, twelve minutes after you
Speaker 1: changed your status. Twelve minutes after the status change, he
Speaker 1: was just standing by hitting refresh refresh for two years.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So it's pretty cool. And he was living in
Speaker 4: LA or sorry, he was living in Nashville. I was
Speaker 4: in LA and I was looking to leave LA at
Speaker 4: that time. I'd been there five years and we just
Speaker 4: decided I would move to Nashville. And it was a
Speaker 4: pretty quick dating relationship until we got married. So it
Speaker 4: was all really fast. But how fast I moved here?
Speaker 4: And when we started talking in February, I moved here
Speaker 4: in April right in with him.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've never lived with the guy really before that.
Speaker 4: And then we got engaged in October and married by
Speaker 4: the following March.
Speaker 1: Wait a minute, okay, help us here. And again, everybody
Speaker 1: has their own journey, their own experience, but to meet
Speaker 1: somebody or it's one thing to move in with somebody
Speaker 1: after what'd you say February to April? But you moved
Speaker 1: across the country. So what into that big of a
Speaker 1: decision to not just move in with a guy, but
Speaker 1: to uproot your life and move across the country for
Speaker 1: a guy.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, it wasn't the first time I'd moved
Speaker 4: across the country. I was kind of kind of good.
Speaker 1: That's your thing, Okay.
Speaker 4: I was thirty three and he was thirty four, and
Speaker 4: we were just kind of at that age where you know,
Speaker 4: we just wanted to kind of go for it, and
Speaker 4: you know, I really wanted, you know, a lot of kids,
Speaker 4: and yeah, you're in your early thirties the time, the
Speaker 4: clock's ticking.
Speaker 2: So I get that.
Speaker 3: There was a lot of thoughts.
Speaker 2: No judgment here. I had a I was engaged in
Speaker 2: four months and married to ten months. It also ended
Speaker 2: in divorce, so I understand how sometimes you can get
Speaker 2: caught up and maybe not do the due diligence you
Speaker 2: should have done to make sure you're actually compatible, make
Speaker 2: sure he actually is the one. So I know it's
Speaker 2: we both know it's so hard, especially when children are involved,
Speaker 2: to make the decision to divorce. What happened if you,
Speaker 2: if you don't mind us asking what happened in your
Speaker 2: relationship where you all decided that was the next best step.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean we I think looking back, I needed
Speaker 4: to do a lot of work on myself before getting
Speaker 4: into a marriage. I'd always been the girl that was
Speaker 4: in the long relationships, and I went from relationship to
Speaker 4: relationships since high school, and I guess I never really
Speaker 4: found myself in order to present myself well to a partner.
Speaker 4: And so looking back back this last three and a
Speaker 4: half years, I've done a lot of work and just
Speaker 4: kind of being single and just being alone for the
Speaker 4: first time, and there's been so much growth in that.
Speaker 4: You know, I finally found, you know, really who I
Speaker 4: am and uncomfortable in who I am, and you know,
Speaker 4: I had to get to know, like what do I
Speaker 4: even like to do? You know, like what do I like?
Speaker 4: Because I would always you know, get into a relationship
Speaker 4: and just become whatever that person wanted me to be.
Speaker 4: You know, I was good at it. So yeah, really
Speaker 4: being alone and sitting in that and discovering myself the
Speaker 4: last three and a half years has been really kind
Speaker 4: of cool. So I probably should have done that before.
Speaker 4: You know, I feel like I gave it a good
Speaker 4: go fresh seven years with him, and you know, we
Speaker 4: we had some struggles with fertility, so we did the
Speaker 4: whole IVF thing and got our miracle daughter and who
Speaker 4: we both adore and we co parent very well together.
Speaker 4: And yeah, I think now I'm kind of ready to
Speaker 4: start dating. But it's a challenge, you know, it's it's
Speaker 4: not just me that I have to think about bringing
Speaker 4: someone else into you know, this little world that we have,
Speaker 4: and and just finding time as a single mom and
Speaker 4: just all the things.
Speaker 1: You know, Elizabeth kind I asked the work you said
Speaker 1: you've done in the past three hundred years, and three
Speaker 1: hundred years and a half years told you we were
Speaker 1: it feels like years. The work you've done on yourself
Speaker 1: since divorce. The person you are now and what you've
Speaker 1: become now, is this Elizabeth better prepared to be in
Speaker 1: that marriage that you were in. Can you be a
Speaker 1: better part? Can you all potentially work now because of
Speaker 1: where you are or that ship's just passed?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 4: He has a girlfriend now and quite a while.
Speaker 1: Okay, thanks DJ.
Speaker 4: Now I have thought about it, you know, right when
Speaker 4: we got divorced, you know, could we get back together?
Speaker 4: I just think that, you know, he probably wouldn't have
Speaker 4: married me now because you know, I'm just so much
Speaker 4: more grounded and who I am and what I want
Speaker 4: and my boundaries and you know, my voice, and so yeah,
Speaker 4: I just I don't know that it would work. And
Speaker 4: we co parent really well, and I like his girlfriend
Speaker 4: and I think they've got a great thing going.
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, and you know what, that's awesome because
Speaker 2: that woman, if she hangs around is obviously in your
Speaker 2: daughter's life and will be a part of your daughter's life,
Speaker 2: and so that's always something to consider.
Speaker 1: It just ca.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, I mean, look, we've been down this road.
Speaker 2: I've been down that road. I've been on both sides
Speaker 2: of it. I've I have my daughters, have a step mom.
Speaker 2: I've been a stepmom, So I get it. It's it's
Speaker 2: you're not just marrying or dating a person, you're dating
Speaker 2: their their children too, and their family. It all matters,
Speaker 2: and so that's a big part of the equation. Have
Speaker 2: you dated in this three and a half years and
Speaker 2: what has that experience been like post divorce.
Speaker 4: It's been wild because I've you know, I never really
Speaker 4: been single this long, and I guess right after my
Speaker 4: divorce I kind of put myself out there too soon,
Speaker 4: and I went on a few dates and I'm like,
Speaker 4: you know, I this is not the time. But it
Speaker 4: was awesome. It's so really strange because for the first
Speaker 4: time ever, really young guys would be the only people
Speaker 4: that would hit on me, like really young, and I'm like,
Speaker 4: I don't know about dating, you know, younger guys. I've
Speaker 4: usually dated people my age, and so that was something
Speaker 4: that that was interesting from the start.
Speaker 2: Did you go on dates with those younger guys? Did
Speaker 2: you say?
Speaker 4: Yes, I did? Yeah?
Speaker 2: And what was that like?
Speaker 4: They were fun? You know, they were like they well,
Speaker 4: I feel like I'm kind of young at heart too,
Speaker 4: and especially you know, I'm forty four, but I have
Speaker 4: a six year old daughter, so I'm kind of more
Speaker 4: in that, you know, younger age group with my mom
Speaker 4: group and things. So but yeah, they I felt like
Speaker 4: the younger guys really put in more of an effort
Speaker 4: and they got really excited about the dates, whereas the
Speaker 4: older guys or you know, guys my age or you know,
Speaker 4: even older, they're just kind of like, yeah, you want
Speaker 4: to go on a date? You know, They're just not
Speaker 4: like I'm really excited.
Speaker 1: You know, Eliz, what is you say younger guys? What
Speaker 1: age range are you talking about?
Speaker 4: Like ten years younger? Like early thirties?
Speaker 1: All right, You're not going out with twenty four year olds.
Speaker 4: No, But they would hit on me and I'm like, sir,
Speaker 4: you are way too young for me.
Speaker 1: Why you think that is? Why is it that younger
Speaker 1: guys are coming after you?
Speaker 4: I don't know. It was kind of a joke there
Speaker 4: for a while because anytime I'd go out with my friends,
Speaker 4: you know, the only guys that would hit on me
Speaker 4: were really young, and they would be like, how old
Speaker 4: is that one? And I'm like, just way too young.
Speaker 2: Some woman might say that's not a bad problem to
Speaker 2: ask you, is that a compliment to have? It is
Speaker 2: a compliment. I would absolutely think that was a compliment.
Speaker 2: I mean, look, I snagged a younger guy. TJ's four
Speaker 2: and a half years younger than me. I'm curious how
Speaker 2: much younger would you feel comfortable with dating and maybe
Speaker 2: eventually marrying, Like do you have a number going younger
Speaker 2: and a number going older?
Speaker 4: Yeah? So, because I've put a lot of thought into that,
Speaker 4: and there were some you know, younger guys that maybe
Speaker 4: I wrote off a little too soon. But my my
Speaker 4: criteria is I don't mind them being you know, ten
Speaker 4: years younger probably at the most. But my thing is,
Speaker 4: you know, they're thirty four, and you know, do they
Speaker 4: want kids? Because I don't want to have any more kids.
Speaker 4: You know, I'm forty four, so kind of past that.
Speaker 4: I think if I were, you know, a decade older,
Speaker 4: and they were a decade young, you know, younger at
Speaker 4: the time, I don't think it would be that big
Speaker 4: of a deal because the you know, the baby years
Speaker 4: are kind of you know, off the table, if that
Speaker 4: makes sense.
Speaker 1: Where are and how are you meeting folks to date
Speaker 1: the past three and a half years?
Speaker 4: Oh jeez. Sometimes through the apps and sometimes out and about. Ideally,
Speaker 4: I think I would like to meet someone you know
Speaker 4: that is like a setup, you know, through a friend
Speaker 4: or something, because it would feel more vetted or at work.
Speaker 4: But now I work from home, so I don't like
Speaker 4: go into an office every day where I'm meeting people
Speaker 4: all the time. And I live on a little five
Speaker 4: acre farm outside of Nashville, so I'm kind of isolated
Speaker 4: a lot, so it's kind of harder. I feel invisible
Speaker 4: a lot. It's like, how do I how do I
Speaker 4: get out there and meet people?
Speaker 1: Don't put too much stock and go into the office
Speaker 1: and meeting people. Office romances go really bad.
Speaker 2: You can actually end your career.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we're here, so we could have absolutely Is that
Speaker 5: about a year ago?
Speaker 2: Do you have? You know, you said you don't want
Speaker 2: any more kids of your own, which is understandable. You've
Speaker 2: got your beautiful six year old daughter, But what about
Speaker 2: dating or being with a man who also has his
Speaker 2: own children.
Speaker 4: I would love that. I in fact, when I was,
Speaker 4: you know, in my early thirties and not married, I
Speaker 4: started thinking I'll probably be a stepmom, you know, because
Speaker 4: I'm getting a little older, and I was excited about
Speaker 4: that idea, you know, of being a stepmom. I think
Speaker 4: the hardest thing, though, has been I've met guys that
Speaker 4: are that have kids, but then it's trying to find time,
Speaker 4: you know, like with parenting schedules and everything. It just
Speaker 4: seems like if you're if you have opposite weekends, forget
Speaker 4: about it. You know, you'll never see each other.
Speaker 1: What is the I guess how serious would things have
Speaker 1: to get before you would allow somebody you're dating to
Speaker 1: meet your daughter? Who's six? Right? So has anything gotten
Speaker 1: that far? And what what would need to happen for
Speaker 1: you to be comfortable with somebody meeting your daughter.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've put a lot of thought into that too,
Speaker 4: because I don't want, you know, her getting attached to
Speaker 4: somebody and then and not working out or you know whatnot.
Speaker 4: It would just have to be I don't know if
Speaker 4: there's exactly a timeframe on it. I've heard like six
Speaker 4: months is a general rule. But I think it would
Speaker 4: have to be you know, I could really see this
Speaker 4: person being in our lives, you know, And so anytime
Speaker 4: I start talking to somebody, I think of that, I'm like, well,
Speaker 4: how would they fit in what we have going on?
Speaker 4: You know, my ex you know, Tyme's got a good
Speaker 4: situation because she's got two boys that are around my
Speaker 4: daughter's age, and you know, Blakely's already calling them her brothers,
Speaker 4: which is cute, you know, So I love that for
Speaker 4: her to have that sibling, you know, the siblings. So yeah,
Speaker 4: if it happened for me, that'd be great.
Speaker 2: But it's really to you just said. That's cool to hear,
Speaker 2: and it is so nice to see a mom supportive
Speaker 2: of her daughter's experience in another family and just knowing
Speaker 2: I used to always say this, but I think you're
Speaker 2: in the same wave. Like, the more people who love
Speaker 2: my girls, the better they're going to be. So would
Speaker 2: I be jealous or territorial if it just means they're
Speaker 2: being loved by more people, And that's I think how
Speaker 2: you have to look at it, if you're looking out
Speaker 2: for their best interests.
Speaker 4: Now, that's so true because I ran a half marathon
Speaker 4: a couple weekends ago.
Speaker 2: Gratulations, thank you, and.
Speaker 4: I didn't have anyone to watch my daughter, and his
Speaker 4: girlfriend was available and she said, I'll take her for
Speaker 4: the morning. So I got to drop her off, you know,
Speaker 4: with his girlfriend, and they went and got their nails done,
Speaker 4: and then afterwards I went to pick her up, and
Speaker 4: me and the girlfriend talked for quite a while, you know,
Speaker 4: just kind of hung out and talked, and it's really
Speaker 4: cool to see that. And she was excited because she
Speaker 4: doesn't usually get one on one time with my daughter,
Speaker 4: so she's she thought it was really special that they
Speaker 4: got their girl time because she's a she's a mom
Speaker 4: of boys, you know, so she doesn't get to do
Speaker 4: the nail stuff very often.
Speaker 1: What are your and again, that's wonderful to hear, given
Speaker 1: we have to excuse me, four divorces between the two
Speaker 1: of us, and you know, those family dynamics can be difficult,
Speaker 1: and it's good to hear it's working as well as
Speaker 1: it is. So so really, we just got to get
Speaker 1: you hooked up here. So what are your absolutes for me?
Speaker 1: It's smoking, Like if I hear somebody's a smoker, that
Speaker 1: would be an absolute. I don't even want to go
Speaker 1: out on the date. Do you do you have some
Speaker 1: absolute non negotiables. I will not compromise and date a
Speaker 1: guy who does blank blank blank blank blank. Do you
Speaker 1: have any gosh you.
Speaker 4: Know, really, I just am looking for someone that's, you know,
Speaker 4: very kind and somebody that loves kids. I guess probably
Speaker 4: if they didn't love kids, that would be a big
Speaker 4: deal breaker for me. So just like loving kids, being
Speaker 4: family oriented, I also have to have the same sense
Speaker 4: of humor, because I realized that in my marriage. I
Speaker 4: was like, you don't get my jokes. My jokes are funny,
Speaker 4: well high brow, but you know we're dark humor.
Speaker 2: Yes, And I think one of the ways we connected
Speaker 2: as friends was through humor one hundred percent, and that
Speaker 2: had been something that I had an experience before. Someone
Speaker 2: you can laugh with. And I love that you just
Speaker 2: said that because I think we both I know, I
Speaker 2: have learned that that for me is a huge component
Speaker 2: of our relationship, is that we can laugh together and
Speaker 2: laugh at the same types of things together. And yeah,
Speaker 2: when you don't get each other's humor, that's tough. That's
Speaker 2: a huge and I've had that, Like you're like, well,
Speaker 2: this is just the you can't have fun the whole
Speaker 2: point of right, we should be enjoying each other and
Speaker 2: you kind of have to enjoy each other's sense of humor.
Speaker 4: Yes, And I never realized that was such a big
Speaker 4: thing for me until you know. Yeah, and then when
Speaker 4: somebody laughs at me, it's almost like my love language.
Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, they get my jokes like they get me,
Speaker 4: and so I love that.
Speaker 2: It's so funny what you just said. Because DJ laughs
Speaker 2: at me, I laugh with him. But I'm okay with that.
Speaker 2: I'm fine if I'm the source of the humor, not
Speaker 2: something that I was choosing to be.
Speaker 1: But you're the fun I tell you this all the time.
Speaker 1: You're one of the funniest people I know. When you're
Speaker 1: not trying to be funny, just you being you, I
Speaker 1: end up falling off.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're hilarious, you really really are.
Speaker 2: But what I try to crack a joke, it falls
Speaker 2: flat every time. So now I just be me and
Speaker 2: that apparently is funny.
Speaker 1: It works. Maybe we also had someone else, I think
Speaker 1: a friend of yours, Rebecca right also who's a member
Speaker 1: of Bache Nation, ended up calling in as well. Both
Speaker 1: of them, and again we're telling folks. This they this
Speaker 1: came out of the blue. We did not solicit So
Speaker 1: you all just happened to both call in. We're going
Speaker 1: to hear from Rebecca a little layer on I do
Speaker 1: part two. But you have you have us. Now, look,
Speaker 1: we have a lot of relationship experience between the two
Speaker 1: of us, and so if you have access to us
Speaker 1: and all of our vast experience and background, what would
Speaker 1: you want to ask? What are some questions you have
Speaker 1: for folks like us?
Speaker 4: Oh gosh, well, I love that you guys met in
Speaker 4: your friends first. You know, I think ideally that that's
Speaker 4: what I would love to have, But like I find
Speaker 4: myself going on dates and kind of sabotaging them from
Speaker 4: the start because I don't want it to go too fast.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 4: I'm like, I just want to get to know each
Speaker 4: other's friends. Can we just go do fun things in
Speaker 4: Nashville and if you know we've all in love, we
Speaker 4: fall in love. But like, I'm not going into it
Speaker 4: trying to fall in love. I just you know, want
Speaker 4: to I want to get to know people and hang
Speaker 4: out and you know, see where it goes. But like,
Speaker 4: how do I how do I say that on a
Speaker 4: first date? Like, Sam, I met someone from the apps,
Speaker 4: and I'm like.
Speaker 1: I would argue, you have a challenge. If you're on
Speaker 1: a dating app and you set up a meeting with
Speaker 1: the person of that dating app, they're going to think
Speaker 1: they're on a date. Period. Yeah, so it's hard to
Speaker 1: get someone out for a meal or whatever and you're
Speaker 1: halfway through your surfing turf and that bottle of line
Speaker 1: you say, oh, yeah, by the way, I just want
Speaker 1: to be friends. That's not going to go over well,
Speaker 1: I'm serious. It just it's difficult to set it up
Speaker 1: that way, I would argue, and I will ask the
Speaker 1: question as well, is there someone already in your life
Speaker 1: who could end up being that mate? Because that for
Speaker 1: eight years I didn't know this one sitting next to
Speaker 1: me I would end up in a relationship with. It
Speaker 1: never crossed my mind. So it's possible that person's already
Speaker 1: in your life. I just think Robe, she's like, it's
Speaker 1: a challenge to on a dating app get somebody to
Speaker 1: then think, oh, we're just I just want to be friends,
Speaker 1: and then see what happens.
Speaker 2: So I think, yes, saying that is off putting immediately,
Speaker 2: and You're right, I do think that probably sabotages because
Speaker 2: I mean if I heard that from someone who I
Speaker 2: was excited about meeting or seeing, I would feel like,
Speaker 2: womph wah. It would be like was it something I said?
Speaker 2: Do you not like how I look? But you would
Speaker 2: feel that immediately, so you're immediately going on the defense.
Speaker 2: But I think that if you have it in your
Speaker 2: mind and you know that you want a relationship that
Speaker 2: is built from a friendship, I think I think you
Speaker 2: don't have to announce it. You'll just feel it out.
Speaker 2: If you have that friend vibe with somebody who you
Speaker 2: also are attracted to, that's obviously what you're looking for, right,
Speaker 2: So I don't think you have to say it. I
Speaker 2: don't think you have to announce it. I think you
Speaker 2: just know. I'll know it when I feel it. I'll
Speaker 2: know it when I see it. We're laughing at the
Speaker 2: same things. We both like to watch horror movies, whatever,
Speaker 2: we both like to run half marathons. You start to
Speaker 2: see that you've got similar interests and similar ways of reacting.
Speaker 2: I always a similar mode of operation. I've noticed that
Speaker 2: in looking at what's worked and what hasn't. If you
Speaker 2: value the same things, you operate similarly. And you like
Speaker 2: some of the same things. That is how friendships are built.
Speaker 2: So if those components are there, there will be a
Speaker 2: friendship in addition to the romance. But I think you
Speaker 2: just have to look for it. If you announce it,
Speaker 2: I think you're gonna turn people off for sure. And
Speaker 2: that's happened because it kind of feels like a rejection
Speaker 2: or like you're on a trial basis, and that doesn't
Speaker 2: feel good, Like, oh, now you know, now I'm.
Speaker 1: The trial base is a good way to put it.
Speaker 2: And I think it would it would definitely make me
Speaker 2: feel like I wasn't good enough or you know, I
Speaker 2: think that might be you know, and not that women
Speaker 2: don't have egos too, but I think the masculine ego
Speaker 2: tends to be even slightly more fragile sometimes in those moments.
Speaker 1: And I asked, Elizabeth, is there anyone you can think
Speaker 1: of in your life right now? You might not even
Speaker 1: be thinking about them as a romantic partner, but do
Speaker 1: you have some friend that's been around a long time?
Speaker 1: And you'll kind of do you have anybody? And in mind,
Speaker 1: you don't have to say who it is, but you
Speaker 1: have anything like that, somebody who's been kind of just
Speaker 1: hanging around for the past I don't know, eight years.
Speaker 4: I wish I could say. Yet, when I moved here
Speaker 4: and moved right in with my ex, I kind of
Speaker 4: we we got friends together, so I kind of moved
Speaker 4: into his world. And so after the divorce, I've had
Speaker 4: to find a whole new group of friends and they're
Speaker 4: all mare you know, like my mom, they're all married.
Speaker 1: So not yet, no help, But that's what I would
Speaker 1: think about that situation. But yeah, to a point, you
Speaker 1: don't have to announce it. You'll just feel it and
Speaker 1: it'll it'll flow, and if y'all want to get together
Speaker 1: again next time, it might be for a baseball game,
Speaker 1: or it might be for something more laid back and
Speaker 1: not necessarily have the pressure and the romantic feel of
Speaker 1: an actual date, and it'll just happen.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: It's funny because I think so many women go into
Speaker 2: these dates, especially someone who may be divorced looking for
Speaker 2: a new partner, who's had the time to work on themselves,
Speaker 2: and kind of almost feel like in a rush, like
Speaker 2: I don't want to date you unless you're serious. It's
Speaker 2: so so funny. You're saying the exact opposite, but both
Speaker 2: of those things I think send people running.
Speaker 4: Do you have any thoughts on where I would go
Speaker 4: to like meet single guys instead of going on the
Speaker 4: apps to set that up?
Speaker 2: You know, luckily I've never had to do the app thing,
Speaker 2: but I've only heard I mean, there are obviously success stories,
Speaker 2: but it feels like it's so hard to determine what
Speaker 2: people's motivations are on those apps. So I would So
Speaker 2: you mentioned you just ran a half marathon. I don't
Speaker 2: know if Nashville, but I'm assuming they have run clubs.
Speaker 2: But I feel like, if you love running, or you
Speaker 2: love hiking, or you love biking, whatever it is, join
Speaker 2: the club in your area. Like we see this all
Speaker 2: the time in New York. We have run clubs everywhere
Speaker 2: and it's so cool. But this is like the new
Speaker 2: non dating app, but a like person to person in
Speaker 2: face meeting with folks who share the same passion, and
Speaker 2: you could start running together and it just can develop.
Speaker 2: There's no pressure then, because you weren't swiping left or right.
Speaker 2: You're actually just doing something you love and they are too.
Speaker 2: So that would be a suggestion of mine to join
Speaker 2: a run club. I know you've got a young daughter,
Speaker 2: but if you can fit it in once or twice
Speaker 2: a week, you might meet some really cool, awesome people
Speaker 2: who share your interests.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and usually the runners are in pretty good shape.
Speaker 1: That's just an added bonus. But your frame graun, I
Speaker 1: know you talk about the other I mean they're all
Speaker 1: coupled up. But in that group, anytime there's a chance
Speaker 1: to get to little folks, you me, we invite it
Speaker 1: to so many little I don't know, a movie premieres
Speaker 1: or a little book signings, or anytime you can get
Speaker 1: into a situation where there's not pressure, whereas just a
Speaker 1: group of folks hanging out. And if it's a say yes,
Speaker 1: if a friend wants to drag you to a church
Speaker 1: pot luck, say yes, if a friend wants to drag
Speaker 1: it to whatever it may be. You just I think
Speaker 1: you always have to get into a situation where there's
Speaker 1: no pressure. When you've met these folks, there's no pressure
Speaker 1: to sit down for a meal, no pressure to make
Speaker 1: a connection, and it just happens naturally to get go
Speaker 1: to a wedding, go to any social any of these
Speaker 1: social gatherings where they're just people just wanted to have
Speaker 1: a good time. And I think that's a way to
Speaker 1: go say yes to everything.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 4: I love that. Now you guys are both parents, so
Speaker 4: what are your thoughts on the whole introducing someone to
Speaker 4: your kid thing?
Speaker 3: Like?
Speaker 4: What what are your thoughts on those on that?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I think it's obviously we all want
Speaker 2: to pret our kids at all costs and I would
Speaker 2: not and did not introduce my then young daughters until
Speaker 2: it was somebody who I knew was going to be
Speaker 2: in their lives for a long time. You can't ever
Speaker 2: predict the future, obviously, and it's a case by case basis.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't for me. I don't know that I would
Speaker 2: give it a timeline. It'd be more if we are
Speaker 2: in an exclusive relationship and we've decided to take that
Speaker 2: next step not to see other people, then it's hard
Speaker 2: to constantly and some people choose to do that and
Speaker 2: I respect that too, But you know, I think once
Speaker 2: you've made that commitment, that for me would be when
Speaker 2: I'd be willing to start to introduce that person into
Speaker 2: my children's life.
Speaker 1: I agree, and we or we just went through this again.
Speaker 1: My daughter is eleven, but we let her guide how
Speaker 1: she wanted to be introduced. We that was never a
Speaker 1: time I had to put pressure on her and say
Speaker 1: this is what's happening. It was more let her guide
Speaker 1: when she got curious, or when I continue to talk
Speaker 1: to her about it and say, hey, are you okay
Speaker 1: if Robot comes to this or comes over to that,
Speaker 1: And it's just become natural to the point now sometimes
Speaker 1: my daughter doesn't even want to come over and hang
Speaker 1: out or go do something unless, oh, is robot going
Speaker 1: to be with us? Right? She asked for so we
Speaker 1: got to this great place. But she one hundred percent
Speaker 1: led the way on what she was comfortable with. And
Speaker 1: win six years seven years old, like your daughter is.
Speaker 1: Maybe she is getting to the point she can make
Speaker 1: that call and she'll get curious. But it really helped
Speaker 1: to kind of the child is old enough to let
Speaker 1: them guide.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I love that. That's really good. Letting them gue.
Speaker 4: What happens if they meet the person and they don't
Speaker 4: really like them, like what do you do? Do you
Speaker 4: stay in the relationship or what?
Speaker 2: And well, you know what, So, especially if they're older
Speaker 2: kids like you could be in this position, right, so
Speaker 2: you could be introduced to this guy's children who were
Speaker 2: older and they may not like you. You know, it's and
Speaker 2: I think I would just say, whoever the person is
Speaker 2: who's not being liked by the children, that's kind of
Speaker 2: a red flag because those children are never going away,
Speaker 2: and you might want to spend some time trying to
Speaker 2: convince them, but sometimes it just doesn't matter, and you
Speaker 2: are setting yourself up, or that your potential partner is
Speaker 2: setting themselves up for a lot of friction that is
Speaker 2: almost impossible to undo. That's why, yes, take your time.
Speaker 2: But if there is a bad experience and a bad
Speaker 2: feeling and bad juju, that might be really hard to overcome,
Speaker 2: and I think it might be I mean, the person
Speaker 2: who is not liked might be the person who has
Speaker 2: to say this isn't a comfortable situation for me to
Speaker 2: be in, and nobody wins. So that's a really tough
Speaker 2: one because I'm sure there are people who can and
Speaker 2: children who can be convinced and persuaded, But sometimes you
Speaker 2: have to ask yourself, can I be in a relationship
Speaker 2: with somebody when I know every time their children are around,
Speaker 2: I feel uncomfortable or they feel that I have found
Speaker 2: that to be a very difficult situation.
Speaker 1: Then you have to ask some questions about why the
Speaker 1: kids might not like the other or the boyfriend or
Speaker 1: the girlfriend, and the owners has to be on the
Speaker 1: parents of that children to a great degree, like what
Speaker 1: have they been saying? Why have they not guided this
Speaker 1: process a little better? Because no kids should just they
Speaker 1: might not like somebody because okay, my mom is being
Speaker 1: replaced my other parents. They might feel that way, but
Speaker 1: they shouldn't. And I know it's delicate, it's very difficult,
Speaker 1: but to just hate somebody outright, you have to have
Speaker 1: help from your partner to guide that situation. But to
Speaker 1: Robot's point, it is so the relationships are hard already.
Speaker 1: Blending families is hard already. On top of that, we
Speaker 1: have to navigate your children not liking me. That is
Speaker 1: difficult to almost impossible to do. So that's a really
Speaker 1: really big deal.
Speaker 2: Yes, no, it is that that is something to like
Speaker 2: when you have children or when the other person that
Speaker 2: has to be considered. Yes, yes, yes, very much. So.
Speaker 4: Well, being out on this farm and you know, working
Speaker 4: from home, I don't have a lot of opportunities to
Speaker 4: get out there and you know, meet people. Not to
Speaker 4: mention the time, right, so I've got my daughter fifty
Speaker 4: percent of the time, So the other fifty percent. You know,
Speaker 4: I try to use that to go out. Then sometimes
Speaker 4: I just need some me time to in alone time.
Speaker 4: So my time is pretty limited.
Speaker 1: But I say, how far out is this farm? I mean,
Speaker 1: do you have to drive into civilization? Why can't you
Speaker 1: go out?
Speaker 4: Yeah? I mean I have to drive in, So it's
Speaker 4: like thirty five minutes.
Speaker 1: That's effort. Yeah, that's effort.
Speaker 2: Effort.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's tough.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, I don't know what you're doing in
Speaker 2: early December.
Speaker 1: I know what she's doing because we're going to drag
Speaker 1: her ass out to La. This is what's going to happen. Now,
Speaker 1: this is what's gonna happen. We're gonna we're gonna all
Speaker 1: take a road trip, all right. So we're gonna get
Speaker 1: you off that farm and you are going to be
Speaker 1: our guest for the jingle Ball December six out in
Speaker 1: Los Angela's Califonia. You're not just gonna get to go
Speaker 1: out and have a good time and party and walk
Speaker 1: the red carpet and do that whole thing. You're actually
Speaker 1: going to come out and we're gonna put you to
Speaker 1: the test. I don't know how you're gonna feel about this,
Speaker 1: but our celebrity mentors are gonna come out and they're
Speaker 1: gonna observe you. You're almost gonna take a flirting test.
Speaker 1: They're gonna watch and see how you operate as you're
Speaker 1: trying to meet people, and then they are going to
Speaker 1: give you kind of a grade on how you.
Speaker 2: Do, and they're gonna help boost your confidence getting back
Speaker 2: out into the dating world, putting yourself out there, showing
Speaker 2: up at this big event and just helping guide you.
Speaker 2: It's it's scary to start over and to say this
Speaker 2: is what I want. I'm putting myself out there. I mean,
Speaker 2: you called us, which I'm really amazed by by the way.
Speaker 2: What were you, what do you why did you call
Speaker 2: and what were you hoping to get out of it?
Speaker 4: Gosh. Well, I've been a long time listener of you
Speaker 4: guys when you first launched your podcast, and I've been
Speaker 4: a long time listener of Jana Kramer's podcast, so I
Speaker 4: know podcasts. And so when this came about, and my
Speaker 4: friend Rebecca called me and told me, have you heard this?
Speaker 4: I do part too, And I said no, she said,
Speaker 4: well listen to it. I just called in and left
Speaker 4: my information. You need to do the same thing. So,
Speaker 4: I mean, she's been my in it to win a
Speaker 4: girl this whole art. We went through our divorces together.
Speaker 4: We've been listening to y'all's podcast together and just kind
Speaker 4: of going through it. So yeah, this this is kind
Speaker 4: of funny that she told me to call in and
Speaker 4: and now here we are, so okay, let.
Speaker 1: Me let me ask you this way. We're gonna you're
Speaker 1: gonna be out in La of course a jingle ball.
Speaker 1: They're gonna gonna observe you, maybe give you some advice.
Speaker 1: How was the best way to put this? Do you
Speaker 1: think you have game? Elizabeth? If there was a guy
Speaker 1: that you're interested in, do you know how to make
Speaker 1: it clear too? Said gentlemen that you're interested. Are you
Speaker 1: a good flirter?
Speaker 4: You know some people say I am, But then I
Speaker 4: don't think that I am. I can talk to people,
Speaker 4: but I don't. I don't know that I have any game.
Speaker 2: But you know what I think that is game like
Speaker 2: knowing who you are, knowing what you are good at,
Speaker 2: and knowing that, hey, I'm not going to be able
Speaker 2: to like sweet talk my way into something. I'm just
Speaker 2: going to be myself. You get to a certain age
Speaker 2: right where you're like, Hey, this is who I am.
Speaker 2: This is what you get. I might not be smooth,
Speaker 2: I might not have swagger, but you know I bring
Speaker 2: other things to the table, like humor and athleticism and
Speaker 2: all those other things. So we're really excited about this
Speaker 2: amazing event jingle Ball. You ready? You excited?
Speaker 4: I'm excited.
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: Are you going to come out? Are you going to
Speaker 1: bring the little one with you? Or are you gonna this
Speaker 1: is gonna be a mom trip?
Speaker 2: No, this is just me smart.
Speaker 1: Well, we will see you out there for the jingle Ball.
Speaker 1: And Elizabeth, this is really cool getting a chance to
Speaker 1: get to know you a little bit. This is really
Speaker 1: really fun.
Speaker 4: I'm excited. Thank you guys.
Speaker 2: So all right, more to come. We can't wait to
Speaker 2: hear all the updates. Elizabeth, And it was great getting
Speaker 2: to know you. Thanks for calling in and thanks for
Speaker 2: being on the podcast.
Speaker 4: Yes, thanks for having me. It's nice meeting you too.
Speaker 1: Good to media, and we will see you in LA
Speaker 1: And folks, we want you to know that if you
Speaker 1: want to put yourself out there, do not give up
Speaker 1: on the idea of finding love again.
Speaker 2: That's right, that's why we're here, and here's what we
Speaker 2: want you to know you can call us, just like
Speaker 2: Elizabeth did at one eight four four four I do Pod.
Speaker 2: Let me give you the numbers if that's tough, because
Speaker 2: I hate when I have to find the letters and
Speaker 2: then figure out the corresponding numbers. Here is Here are
Speaker 2: the numbers you need eight four four four four three
Speaker 2: six seven six three. You can also email us at
Speaker 2: idopod at iHeartRadio dot com how.
Speaker 1: They gonna find love? They can't even find our us
Speaker 1: on social media.
Speaker 2: Have to wait. You forgot how to read copy.
Speaker 1: It's quite all right, but all this information will be
Speaker 1: in our show notes so you can rate and review
Speaker 1: the podcast. We certainly got to appreciate that I Do
Speaker 1: Part two an iHeartRadio podcast. We're falling in Love is
Speaker 1: the objective. We appreciate you spending some time with us
Speaker 1: wherever you are. If it's your first or second, your third,
Speaker 1: maybe even your fourth, we hope you got love right
Speaker 1: this time