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Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it's Lyle. Before we get into the episode,

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Speaker 1: I wanted to talk to you guys about a new

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Speaker 1: thing I'm doing where you can help support my lizard

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Speaker 1: endeavors by becoming a premium member of this podcast over

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Speaker 1: at Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. Premium members, or

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Speaker 1: gek Legends, as I call them, we'll be able to

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Speaker 1: get every new and existing episode of Therapy Gecko completely

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Speaker 1: ad free. They'll also get a bonus podcast episode once

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Speaker 1: a month, a bonus live show episode once a month

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Speaker 1: from all of the live shows I've been doing around

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Speaker 1: the world, a member's only live stream once a month.

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Speaker 1: Plus you'll also support my ability to continue, hopefully doing

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Speaker 1: this podcast for a long time, doing it around the world,

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Speaker 1: and also supporting my ability to occasionally go eat a

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Speaker 1: slice of pizza. Go to Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot

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Speaker 1: com or find the link in the episode description to

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Speaker 1: become a gek Legend today. All right, let's get into

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Speaker 1: the episode. Hi, Hi, Lyle, Hey is this Susan?

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Speaker 2: It sure is?

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Speaker 1: What's going on, Susan? How's life?

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Speaker 2: It's good? I actually just saw you in Portland. My

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Speaker 2: daughter lived there and she took me to your show

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Speaker 2: and it was great.

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Speaker 1: Oh, seck, which one did you go to? The early

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Speaker 1: one of the late one?

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Speaker 2: I saw the one with the lady with the condom

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Speaker 2: in her nose and health the Mouse.

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Speaker 1: Ah, that one was pretty good. Yeah, hell yeah, Well

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Speaker 1: thanks for hilarious. Did you know about my podcast before

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Speaker 1: you came to the to the show?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? She had introduced that to me before and I

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Speaker 2: thought you were hilarious. And when she said she had tickets,

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Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I want to go. And it

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Speaker 2: was a good show.

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Speaker 1: Good good. I'm glad you had fun. Yeah, there's this

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Speaker 1: whole I just got off of a whole run of

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Speaker 1: the Pacific Northwest and I was a really fun ass time.

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Speaker 2: Did I hear that you're coming to Chicago?

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Speaker 3: Uh?

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Speaker 1: Next to next year, I'll come to Chicago. I already

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Speaker 1: came to Chicago, but I'm going to do another tour

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Speaker 1: next year. Hopefully if people show up, I'll uh, I

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Speaker 1: will be in Chicago.

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Speaker 2: I'll bring all my friends.

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Speaker 1: Oh yes, what were you doing in Portland? Just visiting

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Speaker 1: your daughter?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? My daughter moved out there a couple of years

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Speaker 2: ago with her boyfriend, and I get out there maybe

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Speaker 2: once or twice a year. To see her.

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Speaker 1: Nice, nice night. Did you guys do anything else besides

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Speaker 1: go to my show?

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Speaker 2: Sure we did, but that was the epicenter of my visit.

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Speaker 2: I just want you to know that.

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Speaker 1: Good.

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Speaker 2: But we did a lot of the foodie things. We

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Speaker 2: did some hiking, some waterfalls, things like that.

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Speaker 1: Good, good, good. Well, I'm glad. The best compliment I've

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Speaker 1: ever received is that my live show was more majestic

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Speaker 1: than a waterfall. Did you go wish? What's the name

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Speaker 1: of the waterfall you went too? I think I've been

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Speaker 1: there before. What's it called?

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Speaker 2: Well? I mean, of course, she took me to Monoma,

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Speaker 2: and she's in the cat right now, so she can

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Speaker 2: write down the other ones that we went to. They

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Speaker 2: were all cool. I'm just a waterfall person.

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Speaker 1: No, I appreciatetion. I do these shows with no fucking

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Speaker 1: I mean, I go up. I have no idea what

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Speaker 1: we're going to get into. So I'm glad that it

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Speaker 1: was a good experience for you. But enough talking about

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Speaker 1: my live show, Susan. What is it you called in

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Speaker 1: to want to talk about today?

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Speaker 2: Well, listen, I've got a lot that I could talk about.

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Speaker 2: Bell be Choosie. Right now, I work at a major

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Speaker 2: coffee house. And I'm fifty seven, kind of a late

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Speaker 2: bloomer in life. I had kids early, was in a

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Speaker 2: bad relationship, got out of that, ended up on my own,

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Speaker 2: ended up back into another bad situation. And Starbucks, that's

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Speaker 2: a coffee company I landed. I've been there for about

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Speaker 2: six years, and I'm just not happy anymore.

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Speaker 1: M Okay, So you've been there for six years. When

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Speaker 1: did you start being unhappy or were you just unhappy

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Speaker 1: the whole time?

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Speaker 2: Well, I'm gonna say that the first six months to

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Speaker 2: a year were good, and then you know, I just

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Speaker 2: started realizing what kind of people I was working with,

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Speaker 2: and you know, didn't get treated the best. And you know,

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Speaker 2: instead of quitting like a lot of people would, I

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Speaker 2: chose to stuck it out. And this is where I'm

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Speaker 2: at right now.

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Speaker 1: In what ways were the people not good to you?

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Speaker 2: Well, I mean, as you know, and there's nothing wrong

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Speaker 2: with younger people, because I have two younger daughters, you know,

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Speaker 2: And I mean I try to stay hi and I

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Speaker 2: try to stay knowledgeable about, you know, the younger generations.

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Speaker 2: But I'm the older one there at work, so there's

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Speaker 2: not a lot of relatability there. Every once in a while,

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Speaker 2: I feel like they look up me, up to me

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Speaker 2: as like a mom. But a lot of times we

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Speaker 2: don't have a lot of commonality. Hmm.

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Speaker 1: Okay, and do they? And I mean you said that you.

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Speaker 2: Get out of conversations, they don't. They don't.

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Speaker 1: Go ahead. I mean, I was gonna say, you said

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Speaker 1: that they were treating you like actively poorly, and I

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Speaker 1: was wondering if if they were being like hostile to

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Speaker 1: you or or anything like that, but you were you

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Speaker 1: were kind of explaining that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, there was just a couple of situations where

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Speaker 2: we had we had a a trans person coming into

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Speaker 2: the store and apparently they were soliciting up and down

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Speaker 2: the strip mall that we have right there, and you know,

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Speaker 2: it got really bad. They were coming into the store

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Speaker 2: and doing this, and we were told the next time

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Speaker 2: came in and were disruptive to call the police. Well

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Speaker 2: that happened, and I called the police, and then all

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Speaker 2: of a sudden, everyone was calling me racist. And it

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Speaker 2: wasn't about race at all. It was about someone coming

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Speaker 2: into the store doing a bad thing, and we were

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Speaker 2: told to respond in this manner.

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Speaker 1: Okay, were what were they soliciting?

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Speaker 2: Well, you know, they were either soliciting for money or

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Speaker 2: they were soliciting for other things, you know.

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Speaker 1: Okay, hmmm. And the people that you work with have

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Speaker 1: you have you worked with them for a while? Where

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Speaker 1: is it kind of a rotation?

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Speaker 2: I would say it had been about a year.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: No, you either have a first shift or you have

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Speaker 2: a second shift. They did not overlap, so it was

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Speaker 2: with the same shift.

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Speaker 1: M hm. When you what do you like? If you

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Speaker 1: could do anything, what would you do?

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Speaker 2: Well, you know, I'm going to cut a long story

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Speaker 2: short by saying when I was in my abusive relationship,

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Speaker 2: he was a manager at a restaurant for a long

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Speaker 2: time and he wanted to start his own business because

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Speaker 2: he hated his job. So he went out and bought

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Speaker 2: all this woodworking equipment and was set on making pens

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Speaker 2: for a living. Now I have artistic ability, you know,

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Speaker 2: in different areas, and he was like, well, you're going

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Speaker 2: to do this. So he actually kind of forced me

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Speaker 2: to learn how to make pens. I design and make

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Speaker 2: wood and acrylic writing pens on a lathe, And at

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Speaker 2: first I didn't want to do it. He was controlling

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Speaker 2: and it was like he was trying to live through me.

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Speaker 2: But then I got really good at it, and he

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Speaker 2: didn't like that. And I started learning marketing, and I

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Speaker 2: started going to all these art shows and crash shows,

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Speaker 2: and I was really shining introverted and then all of

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Speaker 2: a sudden, I was a really good salesperson and he

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Speaker 2: didn't like that. And as soon as he found out

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Speaker 2: that I was doing better than he could, he like

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Speaker 2: lost interest in it and wouldn't help me anymore with it.

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Speaker 2: So that's what I would be doing if I could

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Speaker 2: do anything.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so pens and craftsmanship things with pens.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was making really good money with it. Before

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Speaker 2: I was in art museum gift shop, I was selling

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Speaker 2: to all these gift stores all over the country. I

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Speaker 2: would spend hours on the white pages, Yellow pages, online

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Speaker 2: and emailing hundreds of stores every day, and that's how

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Speaker 2: I built my sales.

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Speaker 1: So what is it that's preventing you from doing that

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Speaker 1: or stopped you from doing that?

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Speaker 2: Well, financially, it's only me. Right now, I'm going to

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Speaker 2: tell you that I live in an apartment that I

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Speaker 2: that I don't pay for right now because I can't

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Speaker 2: and I have that going for me, but I still

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Speaker 2: don't generate enough to get out on my own. My

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Speaker 2: first goal is to get out of this living situation

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Speaker 2: because it's not good for me. And then I would

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Speaker 2: like to try to restart that business again, but I

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Speaker 2: can't seem to get the momentum to do that.

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Speaker 1: I got a bunch of questions about stuff he just said,

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Speaker 1: But why did why did the business? Why did you?

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Speaker 1: Why did the business stop in the first place?

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Speaker 2: Number one, he lost interest in it when he saw

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Speaker 2: that I was getting good and taking it over. And

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Speaker 2: then I finally, because I lived with this person for

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna say fifteen years. I had my two daughters

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Speaker 2: with me. They were not his. He was not a

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Speaker 2: nice person. He would do just horrible things like at

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Speaker 2: the house, directed at me and directed at my children.

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Speaker 2: And I finally, finally was given an opportunity to get out.

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Speaker 2: My dad was he had cancer. He was dying, so

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Speaker 2: I went and moved in so I could help him

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Speaker 2: until he passed. And then I ended up having to

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Speaker 2: come back here. So I had to stop that because

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Speaker 2: I left him.

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Speaker 1: Okay, and m M all right, And so what's again?

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Speaker 1: I guess to go back to like the barriers between

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Speaker 1: you and continuing to do this business because I know

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Speaker 1: that beforehand, when you were doing it, it was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, it seemed like it was a two person

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Speaker 1: operation between you and that guy, And once that guy

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Speaker 1: started to not want to be involved anymore, it just

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Speaker 1: kind of slowly fucked things up. But now it it's

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Speaker 1: been many years later and it's still something you're interested in.

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Speaker 1: I assume that there's upfront costs and time obligations and

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Speaker 1: you know, a man power obligations and things that are

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Speaker 1: between you and starting this business.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Actually, when when I was running it before, we

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Speaker 2: were living in a house. He was paying the rent.

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Speaker 2: I had a huge garage and that was my workshop.

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Speaker 2: I kept all of my tools, I kept all of

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Speaker 2: my supplies. So I don't have to put any money

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Speaker 2: in it right now. But I do not have a

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Speaker 2: workshop space. I don't have a basement, and I don't

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Speaker 2: have a garage.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so you have you have inventory and things, and

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Speaker 1: you say you don't need to put money into it,

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Speaker 1: except you do need a space. Yeah, okay, all right,

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Speaker 1: So back to your living situation. You live for free

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Speaker 1: and you say you don't have enough money to what

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Speaker 1: is it that you need money in? My first space

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Speaker 1: a workspace, I.

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Speaker 2: Need to get out of this living situation first, because

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Speaker 2: the guy that that that I had left and I

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Speaker 2: know this is this is gonna sound weird, but the

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Speaker 2: guy that I had left when I came back after

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Speaker 2: my dad died, I think he felt guilty. Although it

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Speaker 2: did not change anything, did not change how my children

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Speaker 2: felt about him, did not change how I felt about him.

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Speaker 2: But he felt guilty, so he put me in an

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Speaker 2: apartment and pays for it. I will never reconcile with him.

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Speaker 2: I cannot wait to get out of this living situation

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Speaker 2: because number One, I feel indebted. Number Two, it's not

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Speaker 2: a comfortable situation and I need my independence. I and

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Speaker 2: I just it's so hard to get it now with

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Speaker 2: this economy.

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Speaker 1: How long have you been living there for?

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Speaker 2: I moved back here in twenty seventeen.

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Speaker 1: Years, so you've been having rent free for six years.

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Speaker 2: I pay all the bills, but he pays the rent.

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Speaker 1: And in those six years, I don't I don't really

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Speaker 1: know what the deal is with Starbucks, But like I,

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Speaker 1: were you able to save up?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I save up and then you know, things come

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Speaker 2: up to where I need to fix the car or whatever,

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Speaker 2: and then that kind of eats it down. During the pandemic.

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Speaker 2: That's when it really got problematic because hours were greatly cut.

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Speaker 2: And then my company, you know, they're looking to put

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Speaker 2: newer equipment in the stores and whatnot, So of course

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Speaker 2: that means that the labor is down. So where you

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Speaker 2: used to get fourty hours a week, there was one

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Speaker 2: point where I was getting like twenty one hours a

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Speaker 2: week just to maintain insurance.

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Speaker 1: And these days, these days, are you are you able

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Speaker 1: to make are you able to make a full time

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Speaker 1: living off of Starbucks to the point where you could

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Speaker 1: at minimum find a roommate and rent the room.

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Speaker 2: You know, And I, honestly, I'm going to sound my age,

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Speaker 2: but I've never even thought about living with the roommate.

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Speaker 2: I never have. And I mean, maybe that's something that

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Speaker 2: I have to visit, because maybe that's the only way

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Speaker 2: I'm going to get out of here. My homepayn and

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Speaker 2: I'll be very transparently pay after everything. Like the insurance

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Speaker 2: is like twelve hundred dollars of paycheck.

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Speaker 1: How many how often you get paid?

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Speaker 2: I live in Chicago, in the suburbs, in a rich neighborhood.

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Speaker 1: How often you get paychecks? Say it again, how often

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Speaker 1: are you getting paychecks?

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Speaker 2: Every every two weeks, so I get I get that

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Speaker 2: twice a month.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so twenty four hundred bucks after tax So twenty

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Speaker 1: four hundred bucks after taxes a.

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Speaker 2: Month before I pay my bills.

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Speaker 1: Yes, okay. So, and you don't want to live in

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Speaker 1: this rent free place anymore because you don't want shit

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Speaker 1: to do with that guy, which is a totally legitimate thing. Correct.

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Speaker 2: Well, I mean that's the way I feel right now.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it just it gets it gets harder as

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Speaker 2: I get older, Like I don't want to end up

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Speaker 2: here when I'm ninety.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I want. I listen. I want you to know.

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Speaker 1: And okay, so, like you said to me, you you

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Speaker 1: don't want to live there anymore because you don't want

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Speaker 1: to feel like you're indebted to this guy who has

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Speaker 1: not been cool to you. That's that's that you said,

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Speaker 1: what you're telling me, Yeah, I want, I want. I

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Speaker 1: want you to know if you do need to get

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Speaker 1: a roommate or do something like that, there's no shame

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Speaker 1: in it, especially if you know you're doing it as

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Speaker 1: a result of, like you know, a fifteen year long

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Speaker 1: abusive relationship. There's no shame in doing that. If that

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Speaker 1: is the thing that will bring you closer to doing

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Speaker 1: a thing that makes you happy. And the thing with

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Speaker 1: this pen thing, which it seemed as though you were

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Speaker 1: very good at and you know, marketing, and you have

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Speaker 1: the hustle of you know, going through the white pages

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Speaker 1: and all that stuff. I mean, shit, man, I'd love

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Speaker 1: to see it like try and do that again, especially

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Speaker 1: if you don't have any upfront costs to doing it.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it sounds like you're doing it a long

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Speaker 1: time ago and now there's you know, there's TikTok and

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Speaker 1: Instagram and all these other things that you can use

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Speaker 1: to promote and market products. And it's like, I'd love

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Speaker 1: to see at least finegelar way to give it a try.

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Speaker 1: I know it's horrid to do it under the like

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Speaker 1: financial circumstances, but if you have to get a roommate

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Speaker 1: to avoid feeling like you're indebted to this guy you're

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Speaker 1: an abusive relationship with for many years, I hope you

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Speaker 1: don't take shame in that, because there's no I.

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Speaker 2: Don't reason, I don't see, I don't I don't feel

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Speaker 2: I don't feel shamed because I ended up here. I

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Speaker 2: will feel ashamed of myself as I stay here and

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Speaker 2: a roommate, you know, would be great. I'm just I'm

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Speaker 2: so afraid that that's going to be it for the

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Speaker 2: rest of my life. Like I never got a chance

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Speaker 2: to have my own house. I never got a chance

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Speaker 2: to pay all the bills myself, you know, and I'm

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Speaker 2: already fifty seven years old. I just feel like I

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Speaker 2: haven't accomplished what I want to accomplish. And I mean,

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Speaker 2: I think one of the things that I want to

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Speaker 2: tell your listeners is I envy all of you guys

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Speaker 2: that are in your youth right now, and I just

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Speaker 2: want you to know that you're going to hit a

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Speaker 2: certain age and you're going to be like where did

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Speaker 2: the time go? And it's a scary thing. It's really

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Speaker 2: a scary thing.

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Speaker 1: I get it. I mean I don't get it because

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Speaker 1: I'm not there, and I'm sure when i'm there, i'll

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Speaker 1: get it. But like I guess, I just want to like, like,

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to solve all of your life's problems

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Speaker 1: in this phone call, but I do want to get like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: taking all the emotion out of it and all the

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Speaker 1: age stuff out of it and just looking very plainly

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Speaker 1: at like what is between you and being happy and

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Speaker 1: like figuring that out a little bit. Have you talked

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Speaker 1: to your daughters about all this stuff.

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Speaker 2: My one daughter is listening right now, and I'm going

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Speaker 2: to tell you I have been. We are extremely close

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Speaker 2: and they know all about the difficulties when we were

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Speaker 2: all living together and what went on. And I raised

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Speaker 2: two very strong daughters. I just want you to know

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Speaker 2: I'm so proud of them. They're both completely opposite and different,

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Speaker 2: but they're both very strong women. And I feel like

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Speaker 2: that was my biggest accomplishment in my life, because I

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Speaker 2: didn't feel like I was strong and I didn't feel

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Speaker 2: like I was confident. And I am so glad that

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Speaker 2: I was able to give that to them. But they

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Speaker 2: can't fix my problem. I don't expect them to fix

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Speaker 2: my problem, although I do joke with them and tell

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Speaker 2: them when I'm geriatric, one of them is going to

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Speaker 2: be changing my diapers, you know, whichever daughter decides to

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Speaker 2: let me live with them when I can't take care

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Speaker 2: of myself anymore.

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Speaker 4: Okay, I want I I I'm very happy to hear

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Speaker 4: that you have a lot of pride in the way

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Speaker 4: that you raised your daughters.

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Speaker 1: That's huge, and I really think it is m hm.

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Speaker 1: I guess I'm trying to think, like, I hope, are

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Speaker 1: you Are you happy these days?

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Speaker 2: No? And in all honesty, other than having my children

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Speaker 2: and a few occasions here and there, I can't honestly

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Speaker 2: say that I've really been happy. Am I saying that

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Speaker 2: I'm like hugely depressed all the time? No, but I

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Speaker 2: don't know what that is.

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Speaker 1: I guess for good. I feel like I've asked you

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Speaker 1: this before over the course of this conversation, but just

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Speaker 1: to go back to it, what do you think would

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Speaker 1: make you happy?

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Speaker 2: Well? Number one, to get out of this living situation,

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Speaker 2: to make enough money to support myself and to be

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Speaker 2: able to start my business again. I would still work

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Speaker 2: my coffee house job because they have excellent insurance benefits

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Speaker 2: and I need those. Okay, they also give me free

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Speaker 2: stock and whatnot. I would definitely be able to start

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Speaker 2: this business at the part time. I could do it

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Speaker 2: in my spare time because it's all based from home,

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Speaker 2: unless I decided to go to an art show or

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Speaker 2: a craft show. My stopping point for that business is

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Speaker 2: I am not savvy to set up one of the

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Speaker 2: social media accounts for my pens. Maybe someone that's listening

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Speaker 2: is savvy and would be able to get in touch

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Speaker 2: with me and help me out because I.

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Speaker 1: Won't want you, I want to say, Susan, I I

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Speaker 1: you know you could. And I'm going to go back

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Speaker 1: to this because you talked about like when you were

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Speaker 1: you you you you did a little you did a

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Speaker 1: little woolf of Wall Street hustle and montage for me

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Speaker 1: before earlier this you did. You did. You were like

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Speaker 1: I was, you know, selling them to give shops, and

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Speaker 1: I was going through the white pages and I was

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Speaker 1: figuring out the marketing and I was getting really good

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Speaker 1: at it. It pissed off my husband. That's all all all

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Speaker 1: of that shit that's still that that was not a

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Speaker 1: that hustle and desire and all that stuff that's within you.

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Speaker 1: You can it's still I believe it's still in you

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Speaker 1: and can be applied to learning how to you know,

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Speaker 1: fucking make tiktoks and things. So I think you're giving

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Speaker 1: yourself not enough credit in terms of your ability to

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Speaker 1: uh figure out the figure outable things because again you went,

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Speaker 1: you gave me the whole Wolf of Wall Street montage

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Speaker 1: of you doing that you know, six years ago. And

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Speaker 1: I don't think your ability to do that, if I

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Speaker 1: could just get cheesy here for seconds. I think you're

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Speaker 1: ability to do that is potentially only limited by your

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Speaker 1: negative beliefs about yourself, which I get and I and

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Speaker 1: I get I don't want to be like a fucking

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Speaker 1: Tony Robbins dude, but like, you know what, what what

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Speaker 1: other shot that we have?

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Speaker 5: You know?

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Speaker 1: So, so I think you're not giving yourself enough credit

404
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Speaker 1: in terms of your potential to figure these things out.

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Speaker 1: And and I wish you did, because you seem really

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Speaker 1: cool and it seems like this is something that you like.

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Speaker 1: And I do think that you could do it at

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Speaker 1: least at least enough to like make some extra money,

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Speaker 1: even if you're not you know, building a whole fucking empire,

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Speaker 1: at least enough to get something going, you know, is

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Speaker 1: an Is any of this making sense to you?

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Speaker 4: Right?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? It is? Listen. I have had a day and

414
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Speaker 2: a half to lay here in my bed and think

415
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:03,280
Speaker 2: about it because I brought a bug back from Portland.

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Speaker 2: My daughter ended up with COVID and I think I

417
00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,920
Speaker 2: just have a bad case of the flu. But I've

418
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Speaker 2: been laying in that sweating and just thinking about this stuff,

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Speaker 2: which is why I got up the courage to give

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Speaker 2: you a call because I really don't want to settle

421
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Speaker 2: like this anymore. I want to get out of here.

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Speaker 2: Life is short.

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Speaker 1: It is short, do it, Susan. I know, I know.

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Speaker 1: It's sorry. I know it's sorry. I hate. I hate.

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Speaker 1: It's like it's a bummer. I hate, I hate. You know.

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Speaker 1: I want to be motivational, but I also understand the

427
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Speaker 1: the difficulties that are present in just doing it. I

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Speaker 1: really really really do.

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Speaker 3: Yep.

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Speaker 1: But but but like fuck, Susan, at least give it

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Speaker 1: a try.

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Speaker 2: I think I'm gonna I'm gonna send you some pictures

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Speaker 2: of my pens when we get off the phone, and

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Speaker 2: you can.

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Speaker 3: Look at them.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I'll take a look at your pens. What do

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Speaker 1: you have a Do you have any social media set

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00:24:59,320 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 1: up on your pens?

439
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,160
Speaker 2: No? I just you know, I've got a regular Facebook,

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00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:07,359
Speaker 2: and I will post them on there occasionally, but I

441
00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 2: don't want to ever really looking at everything there. All right, Well,

442
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:13,879
Speaker 2: but when I get one, I will share it with you.

443
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:18,480
Speaker 1: Okay. Well, Susan, I'm glad that I'm glad. I hope

444
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:21,960
Speaker 1: that this phone call was enjoyable for you. I appreciate

445
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,439
Speaker 1: you calling in and talking about all this stuff. I

446
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 1: hope it was of some positive benefit to you. And

447
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:34,600
Speaker 1: thanks for sharing all of this.

448
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I just want to thank you because you're

449
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:44,760
Speaker 2: giving my daughter and I another form of bonding by

450
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 2: sharing in your show. So I appreciate you very much.

451
00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:52,719
Speaker 1: Of course, and talking to you, I'm now realizing that

452
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:56,199
Speaker 1: the Canadian accent and the Midwestern accent sound very similar,

453
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:58,480
Speaker 1: because I thought you were a Canadian for a little bit,

454
00:25:58,680 --> 00:25:59,480
Speaker 1: and I remembered your.

455
00:25:59,440 --> 00:26:02,119
Speaker 2: Midwestern because it's from Chicago.

456
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:05,680
Speaker 1: Uh, soonon, So anything else you want to say to

457
00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 1: the people the computer before we.

458
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:12,399
Speaker 2: Go, No, just I love everyone on your show, and

459
00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:15,320
Speaker 2: I like all the comments and all the suggestions, and

460
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:18,160
Speaker 2: thank you so much for listening. I appreciate you having

461
00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:18,439
Speaker 2: an night.

462
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,960
Speaker 1: Susan, thank you you too.

463
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:22,560
Speaker 2: Bye bye.

464
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:28,399
Speaker 1: Hm. I'm trying to think. I mean, I use pens

465
00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 1: to people, people still write stuff. Every year, people use

466
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:39,680
Speaker 1: pens a little bit less. But I mean, damn, okay,

467
00:26:39,680 --> 00:26:41,679
Speaker 1: I just tried to be motivational. But then I'm now

468
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:43,600
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, every year, people use pens a little

469
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,359
Speaker 1: bit less. I mean it's I want to be I

470
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:53,480
Speaker 1: want to be motivational, but also not lie. Every year

471
00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 1: people use pens less, but in terms of like the

472
00:26:56,560 --> 00:27:02,119
Speaker 1: not like the people who fucking are like connoisseurs and

473
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:11,160
Speaker 1: appreciators of like artisan pens. You know those people. Every

474
00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:15,800
Speaker 1: year a lot of them die because it's usually elderly people.

475
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,560
Speaker 1: But maybe they have children and they teach their children

476
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:25,960
Speaker 1: to appreciate pens. Do the pens, think, Susan, do it,

477
00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:28,040
Speaker 1: do it, and let's see what I don't want to

478
00:27:28,160 --> 00:27:30,280
Speaker 1: because I could sit here in conjecture, but there's only

479
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:33,040
Speaker 1: one way to find out if it'll work. All right,

480
00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:35,680
Speaker 1: I want to eat a pen right now. I don't

481
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:37,960
Speaker 1: know why.

482
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 3: Hello, Hello, how are you? Hello? Lyle?

483
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:45,760
Speaker 1: Yes?

484
00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:46,840
Speaker 3: What's up?

485
00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:47,120
Speaker 1: Man?

486
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 5: How are you?

487
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:56,440
Speaker 1: How much? How are you? I'm just telling, uh, what's new?

488
00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:57,120
Speaker 1: What's going on?

489
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:03,080
Speaker 3: Just chilling? Nothing's new. You want to hear my story?

490
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,800
Speaker 1: Uh, tell me to start with the middle. What's the

491
00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:08,520
Speaker 1: middle of the story.

492
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,840
Speaker 3: The middle of the story is I'm dangling by my

493
00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:13,240
Speaker 3: fingertips on a billboard.

494
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:16,440
Speaker 1: Oh that's a good middle. Yeah, let's hear the whole thing.

495
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:23,640
Speaker 3: All right. So I was I was with my homies

496
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 3: and we were doing some graffiti, and we decided to

497
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:34,439
Speaker 3: go hit this billboard, and we climbed up like forty

498
00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:37,560
Speaker 3: feet on an I beam and I tried to pull

499
00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 3: myself up.

500
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 1: Fuck, I'm nervous, bro, You're nervous. You were you were dangling,

501
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: You almost died, and you're nervous talking to an insane

502
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:56,160
Speaker 1: guy and a gecko pajamas on website. You almost died, man,

503
00:28:56,240 --> 00:29:01,280
Speaker 1: you can do anything. Who are you? Tell me the story?

504
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 2: All right?

505
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:06,600
Speaker 3: So I climbed like forty feet up an ibam and

506
00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:10,480
Speaker 3: by the time I got up the ibeam, I was like,

507
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:14,840
Speaker 3: hella out of strength. So I tried to pull myself up,

508
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 3: and I was dangling by my fingertips because I couldn't

509
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:22,040
Speaker 3: pull myself up, and then I had to like let

510
00:29:22,120 --> 00:29:26,000
Speaker 3: go and slide down the ibam. And I was in jeans,

511
00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:29,560
Speaker 3: shorts and a tank top. So I cut myself up

512
00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:33,120
Speaker 3: hella bad and fell like forty feet to the ground.

513
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:37,520
Speaker 3: But I didn't even break any bones or anything. That

514
00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 3: shit was crazy.

515
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,080
Speaker 1: You fell forty feet too, So okay, So you were

516
00:29:41,160 --> 00:29:43,280
Speaker 1: dangling and you fell like so you like kind of

517
00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 1: slid down a pole.

518
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:48,560
Speaker 3: I had to let go of the grip that I

519
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:53,440
Speaker 3: had on the billboard and grabbed the ibam and basically

520
00:29:53,560 --> 00:30:00,680
Speaker 3: hug it and slide down it forty feet. It was like, yeah,

521
00:30:00,800 --> 00:30:02,040
Speaker 3: for thirty or forty feet.

522
00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 1: I don't know what was the billboard for, dude.

523
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:08,520
Speaker 3: I couldn't tell you, honestly.

524
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 1: You have hit a lot of billboards when you tagged it.

525
00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:16,640
Speaker 3: I didn't tag it. I didn't even get all the

526
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 3: way up I was.

527
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:20,600
Speaker 1: I was with two other friends, like a billboard for

528
00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:24,320
Speaker 1: like breast cancer research or something, and you were fucking.

529
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:27,560
Speaker 5: You know.

530
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 3: It's funny. Okay, First of all, I wouldn't have done

531
00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:34,280
Speaker 3: a penis because I'm actually I'm Hella Raw. We were

532
00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:36,960
Speaker 3: gonna do some so bast pieces up there. But it's

533
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:39,440
Speaker 3: funny that you should mention that because I've hit a

534
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 3: lot of billboards and I have a pattern of not

535
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:45,280
Speaker 3: looking at what they say before I get on them.

536
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 3: And I've hit one for an adoption agency. And one

537
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:52,800
Speaker 3: time I got up on one and it was for

538
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:59,720
Speaker 3: like autism awareness, and I was like, you know, I

539
00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:02,320
Speaker 3: would I feel too bad to go over that one.

540
00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 3: So I ripped the billboard off and I painted underneath it,

541
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:07,880
Speaker 3: so I have You're.

542
00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 1: The first person I've ever met that has used art

543
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,240
Speaker 1: to make the lives of children worse.

544
00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:21,600
Speaker 3: You know what, You have a point there, but it

545
00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:22,800
Speaker 3: was not bad intentions.

546
00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 1: So so you so you you defiled an autism awareness

547
00:31:29,120 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 1: billboard to make one.

548
00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:34,720
Speaker 4: Of those no no I off things.

549
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 3: I ripped it off and I threw it off, and

550
00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:40,360
Speaker 3: then I painted underneath it.

551
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:42,200
Speaker 1: What did you paint underneath it?

552
00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:45,560
Speaker 3: I am not going to tell you because I gave

553
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:47,240
Speaker 3: the color of my real name.

554
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:52,680
Speaker 1: Wait, hold on, I wait, okay, So okay, so we

555
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 1: know it's something you would not want to be associated with.

556
00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,720
Speaker 3: Well, it's the secret name. I'm a graffiti writer. I've

557
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 3: been in I've been writing graffiti for a long time.

558
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:04,200
Speaker 1: What did you What did you write under the board?

559
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:06,040
Speaker 1: What did you put it under there?

560
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:08,000
Speaker 3: Did we did we say my name on there?

561
00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,200
Speaker 1: I don't know. I can bleep it out if you want.

562
00:32:11,720 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 3: All right, Well, smiler, smiler, smiler, you wrote no, I

563
00:32:22,360 --> 00:32:26,600
Speaker 3: wrote smiler? What is that's my name? That's well, that's

564
00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 3: what I write?

565
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 1: Did you put you? So you just put your own name?

566
00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:33,520
Speaker 3: Yeah?

567
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, you climbed for you totally deserved the thing that

568
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:40,560
Speaker 1: happened to you at the beginning of this. You climbed,

569
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 1: n you climbed the billboard, to get rid of an

570
00:32:46,040 --> 00:32:49,560
Speaker 1: autism awareness ad to write your.

571
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:55,000
Speaker 3: Own no, well, to be to be clear, these are

572
00:32:55,040 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 3: separate instances.

573
00:32:56,640 --> 00:33:00,240
Speaker 1: But yeah, basically, somebody in the chat just seven aisle

574
00:33:00,320 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: doesn't get graffiti. I don't know if this is me

575
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 1: not getting graffiti.

576
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:10,120
Speaker 3: Couldn't you have I think could get it, and you.

577
00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:13,240
Speaker 1: Have picked like a fucking Crispy Kreme at or something

578
00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 1: other than autism awareness.

579
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:21,800
Speaker 3: I just I choked that up to unawareness because truly

580
00:33:21,920 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 3: I didn't look at what it said before I went

581
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 3: up there.

582
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:30,840
Speaker 1: Awareness is important, I like, I like you were like,

583
00:33:31,920 --> 00:33:35,880
Speaker 1: it's much more important for people to see my name

584
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:38,880
Speaker 1: than to see this.

585
00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 3: Well, let me let me ask you something. What's the

586
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:45,280
Speaker 3: difference between me doing it and the advertisement agency doing it?

587
00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:47,120
Speaker 1: What are you talking about?

588
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:50,480
Speaker 3: It's just that they paid for it.

589
00:33:55,280 --> 00:33:58,760
Speaker 1: What they did, the charity paid for people donate to

590
00:33:58,840 --> 00:34:05,320
Speaker 1: autism Okay, sure, and then and then they're funding your

591
00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: stupid tank.

592
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, that was an outlying instance. I've hit a lot

593
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:14,200
Speaker 3: of billboards. They're not all like that, you know.

594
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,400
Speaker 1: Tell me which was tell me about the adoption agency one?

595
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 1: What did you put on there?

596
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:21,319
Speaker 3: I wrote? Smiler? I wrote smiler on every single one

597
00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:21,640
Speaker 3: of them.

598
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,960
Speaker 1: You didn't even write, and you didn't. Here's the thing,

599
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 1: if you had replaced it, if you like, if you

600
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:31,280
Speaker 1: were bidding for attention with a greater cause of some kind,

601
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:34,560
Speaker 1: like if I don't know, even if you like had

602
00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 1: some kind of pretentious message behind, even if you drew

603
00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:44,000
Speaker 1: a little fucking like I or something and you were like, well,

604
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:47,279
Speaker 1: this I represents world peace around. Even if you had

605
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:52,480
Speaker 1: intentions of some kind of a nice message of something,

606
00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:56,239
Speaker 1: it would still be douchey. But I but I would

607
00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:59,120
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, at least he thought he was doing something,

608
00:34:59,560 --> 00:35:03,000
Speaker 1: but you just tore it down to write your fucking name.

609
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 1: You know what.

610
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:08,759
Speaker 3: I was on a sick one, Lyle. I was on

611
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:09,399
Speaker 3: a sick one.

612
00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:11,200
Speaker 1: What does that mean?

613
00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 3: It means I was acting crazy and I wasn't. I

614
00:35:15,680 --> 00:35:17,760
Speaker 3: wasn't worried about anything in that moment.

615
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:23,319
Speaker 1: Okay, tell me, do you write smiler on all of them?

616
00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:30,719
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, dude, one day, but billboards aren't all it, dude.

617
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: One day, there's gonna be one of those kids at

618
00:35:32,719 --> 00:35:36,200
Speaker 1: the at the orphanage is gonna make it big in

619
00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:40,239
Speaker 1: uh politics in your local area. Yeah, they're gonna They're

620
00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:43,840
Speaker 1: gonna fucking come for smiler, dude.

621
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:46,319
Speaker 3: I'll I'll accept it. I'll accept my fate.

622
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:51,520
Speaker 1: At that point, you're gonna get what's that movie Orphan Black?

623
00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 3: I've never heard of it.

624
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:57,440
Speaker 1: I've never heard of it either. I just is that

625
00:35:57,480 --> 00:36:02,319
Speaker 1: a real Is that a real show Orphan Black? Or

626
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,760
Speaker 1: is that a movie?

627
00:36:07,239 --> 00:36:08,600
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know this movie.

628
00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:10,759
Speaker 1: What's about the chat is saying Somebody in the chat

629
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:12,840
Speaker 1: is saying, Brandon, we can keep all this chat stuff in.

630
00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:17,719
Speaker 1: Somebody in the chat is saying that autism speaks as

631
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:19,840
Speaker 1: a hate group. I don't know why I repeated that.

632
00:36:19,880 --> 00:36:22,720
Speaker 1: I don't want if that's I don't think that's true.

633
00:36:22,880 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 1: But I have no idea. I'm not going to google

634
00:36:26,160 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 1: that is No, I'm not repeating that. Okay, what else?

635
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:32,720
Speaker 1: What else have you got? What other billboards.

636
00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:34,200
Speaker 2: Down?

637
00:36:35,840 --> 00:36:37,600
Speaker 3: I've hit a lot of billboards, to be honest, I

638
00:36:37,640 --> 00:36:39,920
Speaker 3: probably couldn't remember what a lot of them said. But

639
00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:43,680
Speaker 3: I'm pretty much done hitting billboards. If it makes you

640
00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:45,799
Speaker 3: feel comfortable, because I almost died doing it.

641
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:48,759
Speaker 1: Wait, hold on, okay, somebody, actually, this might hold on.

642
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:49,919
Speaker 1: This might be your lucky day.

643
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 4: Man.

644
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:52,000
Speaker 1: A lot of people in the chat are saying that

645
00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:57,240
Speaker 1: Autism Speaks is like a bad group. Let me google

646
00:36:57,280 --> 00:36:57,920
Speaker 1: this real quick.

647
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:06,480
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, damn, they're fucking with me. Well, I'll

648
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:09,720
Speaker 3: bring it back to my original point. There was no intention.

649
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,799
Speaker 3: I didn't know what it said. So you could praise me,

650
00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:15,359
Speaker 3: you could hate me. I didn't do I didn't really

651
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 3: do anything.

652
00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:21,000
Speaker 1: I listen, here's the thing. I'm not going to put

653
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:24,080
Speaker 1: Autism Speaks on blast. I don't know anything about them.

654
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:31,600
Speaker 1: But apparently, apparently, apparently it's people are torn on it.

655
00:37:31,760 --> 00:37:34,680
Speaker 1: So you're you're not You're not going to be universally

656
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:38,719
Speaker 1: condemned for your actions. But I don't know. I have

657
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:42,480
Speaker 1: no idea. Tell me some other billboards that you've defiled.

658
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:47,759
Speaker 3: Well, I can't remember all of them. It's been it's

659
00:37:47,760 --> 00:37:50,440
Speaker 3: been a long time, you know, it's been a long

660
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:51,360
Speaker 3: time I've been doing this.

661
00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:56,919
Speaker 1: You fucked over some kids, you did, you did?

662
00:37:57,800 --> 00:37:58,040
Speaker 3: Yeah?

663
00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:00,759
Speaker 1: Can you admit you fucked over with some kids?

664
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:06,879
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, okay, you know, yeah, you're right. I didn't

665
00:38:06,880 --> 00:38:09,719
Speaker 3: look at that one before I got up. Also, and

666
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:11,840
Speaker 3: you know what, you know what, honestly, I hit an

667
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:15,880
Speaker 3: Apple one, an Apple one, an Apple billboard for the

668
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 3: iPhone have you fucked?

669
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:20,840
Speaker 1: Have you hit like because you know what, you actually

670
00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:22,680
Speaker 1: fucked over a lot of people. Also because it's some

671
00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:24,840
Speaker 1: because I know you've hit hundreds of billboards and you

672
00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,440
Speaker 1: don't even know what it is. Some very hungry trucker

673
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:33,120
Speaker 1: drove drove by exit thirty five without having any idea

674
00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:37,520
Speaker 1: that there was a McDonald's there, and you fucked that guy.

675
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:42,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would argue that if someone wants McDonald's, they're

676
00:38:42,080 --> 00:38:44,279
Speaker 3: going to see it. You know, they're going to find it.

677
00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:47,560
Speaker 3: That billboard isn't going to make too much.

678
00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:50,440
Speaker 1: Of a difference. So are you a full time graffiti

679
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:52,399
Speaker 1: artist or does that not make a lot of money?

680
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:53,440
Speaker 3: No, I'm a tattooer.

681
00:38:53,480 --> 00:38:57,480
Speaker 1: Actually, okay, you're graffitiing people's body.

682
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:02,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, yep, tagging people's bodies. I'm on, I'm on tour

683
00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:03,840
Speaker 3: right now with tattooing.

684
00:39:04,239 --> 00:39:06,920
Speaker 1: Give me some Give me some tattoos that you've done recently.

685
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 3: I did lover in graffiti letters on my friend's collarbones.

686
00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:17,760
Speaker 3: I've been doing a lot of like alien ship lately,

687
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:22,600
Speaker 3: like aliens with like four shortened guns and like all

688
00:39:22,719 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 3: kinds of just sci fi ship. My thing right now

689
00:39:27,120 --> 00:39:30,440
Speaker 3: is kind of like characters with big shoes, and I'm like,

690
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:33,040
Speaker 3: hella into fashion, so I just dressed them up in

691
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:36,600
Speaker 3: like cool ass like trip pants and like new rock

692
00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:38,000
Speaker 3: shoes that type of ship.

693
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:42,000
Speaker 1: Like uh, like like who what characters?

694
00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:42,920
Speaker 2: My?

695
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,279
Speaker 3: Just these little characters that I draw, just little like

696
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:46,080
Speaker 3: little brass.

697
00:39:48,640 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 1: I thought he was drawing, like like, uh, I was

698
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:53,200
Speaker 1: gonna say I was gonna use Mickey Mouse, but that

699
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:56,080
Speaker 1: would be a bad example because he already has big.

700
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 3: Shoes, yeah he does, and big ears.

701
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:01,640
Speaker 1: How long you have been tattooed for.

702
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:05,759
Speaker 3: Like two and a half years. I've been full time

703
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:08,239
Speaker 3: tattooing for like a year. Though.

704
00:40:10,880 --> 00:40:12,640
Speaker 1: What were you doing before you were tattoo artist?

705
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,719
Speaker 3: I did a bunch of shit, but just random ass

706
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 3: jobs like grocery stores, you know, cafeterias, dishwashing, sweeping, just

707
00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 3: random ass ship.

708
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 1: A few people in the chat are asking what your

709
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 1: Instagram is. You can't I know that you wanted to

710
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,800
Speaker 1: stay You can if you want.

711
00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:34,839
Speaker 3: If they if they know they know, and they might

712
00:40:34,920 --> 00:40:36,200
Speaker 3: know lyle they might.

713
00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:39,280
Speaker 1: You know what. I think that was a good idea.

714
00:40:39,320 --> 00:40:47,160
Speaker 1: You sacrificed a good free self promotion bit in favor

715
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:51,319
Speaker 1: of not putting a face to the guy who defiled

716
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:58,840
Speaker 1: the adoption billboard. Now you are so so, you're so

717
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:00,239
Speaker 1: ever since the accident, you're giving up.

718
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,319
Speaker 3: No, I'm not giving up on graffiti, just not like

719
00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:07,279
Speaker 3: climbing like that. I learned it's not really worth it

720
00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:08,160
Speaker 3: to risk my life.

721
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:11,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like that was crazy. Yeah, I mean

722
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 1: I feel like it's a karma thing.

723
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:17,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, you could be right. You could be right. Believe me,

724
00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:18,040
Speaker 3: I've thought about that.

725
00:41:18,360 --> 00:41:21,880
Speaker 1: There was definitely a few orphans late at night greasing

726
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:23,879
Speaker 1: up that billboard poll.

727
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,080
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, and.

728
00:41:28,239 --> 00:41:32,400
Speaker 1: Wow, where else are you going to tag now or

729
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:35,600
Speaker 1: have retired from billboards?

730
00:41:36,719 --> 00:41:39,319
Speaker 3: Well, sit Portland and then Seattle. That's what we're doing

731
00:41:39,400 --> 00:41:45,560
Speaker 3: right now. But anywhere I'm considerate, you know, like I

732
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:47,879
Speaker 3: know you were, dude. You know what's fucked up? Because

733
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:49,839
Speaker 3: I was supposed to be at your San Francisco show.

734
00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:52,520
Speaker 3: I had a ticket and I I couldn't go.

735
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:53,520
Speaker 1: Why not.

736
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 3: Because I got sick?

737
00:41:56,800 --> 00:41:59,479
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, good reason.

738
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,640
Speaker 3: Hey, look at that. I didn't put anybody at risk.

739
00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 3: I'm a good person.

740
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:06,279
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, we'll give you.

741
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:12,319
Speaker 3: There we go. What I was looking forward to it, man,

742
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:14,279
Speaker 3: I was looking forward to I bought it like months

743
00:42:14,280 --> 00:42:15,040
Speaker 3: in advance too.

744
00:42:15,160 --> 00:42:16,480
Speaker 1: It was a it was a good show that the

745
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:18,640
Speaker 1: San Francisco one. It was was it was good.

746
00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:22,279
Speaker 3: I'll be my friend. My friend went.

747
00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:23,719
Speaker 1: Did they like it?

748
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:29,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, he liked it. He's also tattooer. He's here

749
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:32,839
Speaker 3: with me. Yeah, he's also a tattooer. He was there

750
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:37,080
Speaker 3: when I almost died. We had another crazy thing happened

751
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 3: yesterday and in the name.

752
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:40,640
Speaker 1: Of graffiti, what was it.

753
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:47,319
Speaker 3: So we're up here tattooing in Portland right now. But

754
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,120
Speaker 3: we had to stop and get some spray paint on

755
00:42:49,160 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 3: the way and he, I'm too scared to steal. But

756
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:58,359
Speaker 3: he went into home depot in Salem, Oregon. Damn, I'm

757
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:02,080
Speaker 3: giving up all the for me. But he went into

758
00:43:02,120 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 3: home depot and he tried to steel paint and he

759
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 3: ended up having to run and like hopping fences and

760
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:09,920
Speaker 3: ship and I don't even have a license, but I

761
00:43:09,960 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 3: had to take his car and pull over on the

762
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:15,319
Speaker 3: freeway where he was hiding in the bushes like there

763
00:43:15,360 --> 00:43:17,640
Speaker 3: was no shoulder, but I had to like pull over

764
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:19,960
Speaker 3: up onto a hill and he like ran hell a

765
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:22,719
Speaker 3: far and got in the car and and we're good.

766
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:23,839
Speaker 3: But that happened too.

767
00:43:25,120 --> 00:43:27,680
Speaker 1: He's right, gets you into a lot of trouble.

768
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:31,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it does. You know, I have a question?

769
00:43:31,840 --> 00:43:35,480
Speaker 1: Low, Yeah, I give your friend the phone, all right,

770
00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:36,760
Speaker 1: thank you? Bye?

771
00:43:37,800 --> 00:43:38,400
Speaker 3: Hey, what's up?

772
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:38,720
Speaker 5: Dude?

773
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:39,560
Speaker 1: Hey, what's up?

774
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:44,319
Speaker 3: Man? I caught me and my friends. We did like

775
00:43:44,360 --> 00:43:47,080
Speaker 3: some therapy Gecko tags outside of the show. Did you

776
00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:48,160
Speaker 3: see those tiny chaps?

777
00:43:48,239 --> 00:43:52,200
Speaker 1: Wait? You did therapy echo tags? I want Yeah, I

778
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:56,279
Speaker 1: just say this on record real quick? Can I can

779
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:59,759
Speaker 1: you use a second I in no way, shape or

780
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:07,400
Speaker 1: form support the defiling of any adoption agency advertisements in

781
00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:10,439
Speaker 1: the name advertisements.

782
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 3: It's good. It was like on a bus stop ad

783
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:20,760
Speaker 3: like some random ship just on the glass, and that dude,

784
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:22,040
Speaker 3: who knows they get changed?

785
00:44:22,080 --> 00:44:23,279
Speaker 1: What do you mean you can't? What do you mean

786
00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:23,719
Speaker 1: who knows?

787
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:24,359
Speaker 2: We dude?

788
00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:25,520
Speaker 1: Have we not been over there?

789
00:44:25,800 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 3: You get yo? Yeah?

790
00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 1: Yeah they little Saint Jude's Hospital and wrote therapy Gecko.

791
00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:38,000
Speaker 3: Didn't you That would be heinous, that would be sucked up.

792
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:42,960
Speaker 3: But you know, like it's just being outside and playing

793
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:45,200
Speaker 3: around like it's I don't know, I don't think it's

794
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:48,160
Speaker 3: as deep as it. I don't know, it's not that deep.

795
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:49,120
Speaker 3: It's all good, you know.

796
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 1: Just I appreciate you spreading the word. But if you

797
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 1: would just look at what it is, your spray painting

798
00:44:57,840 --> 00:44:59,839
Speaker 1: on first, I got you.

799
00:44:59,880 --> 00:45:01,480
Speaker 3: I understand that. I respect that.

800
00:45:03,320 --> 00:45:05,640
Speaker 1: Send me send me a do you is it? Are you?

801
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:06,760
Speaker 1: Do you live near the area?

802
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:09,800
Speaker 3: I live in Oakland?

803
00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:12,640
Speaker 1: Okay, the next time you're there, send me a picture.

804
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:13,880
Speaker 1: I want to see. Did you take a picture of it?

805
00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:14,360
Speaker 5: At least?

806
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:18,000
Speaker 3: Uh? No, I didn't. I don't take pictures of a

807
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:18,799
Speaker 3: lot of stuff I do.

808
00:45:19,160 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 5: Yeah.

809
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:21,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll do a huge one for you on a

810
00:45:21,280 --> 00:45:24,960
Speaker 3: blank freeway wall that is just literally a blank canvas.

811
00:45:25,080 --> 00:45:26,440
Speaker 3: Is asking for it, you know.

812
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:29,480
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, as long as.

813
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:30,919
Speaker 3: I'll send you a picture, I'm not.

814
00:45:30,880 --> 00:45:33,560
Speaker 1: Criminally inflicted anyway in this. I'm on board.

815
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:35,919
Speaker 3: No, you're good. I'm gonna do it regardless. I'll send

816
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:38,840
Speaker 3: it to you and you'll you'll get a kick awesome.

817
00:45:39,960 --> 00:45:41,600
Speaker 1: Is there anything else? If you guys want to say

818
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we.

819
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:50,320
Speaker 3: Go, uh, I love y'all. Thank you so much, Thank you, guys.

820
00:45:50,680 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 1: I'll see, I'll see. I'll see you guys at the

821
00:45:56,560 --> 00:45:57,360
Speaker 1: next I'm.

822
00:45:57,200 --> 00:45:59,359
Speaker 3: Gonna be at the next At that point, you will,

823
00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:02,040
Speaker 3: I'll introduce myself.

824
00:46:02,560 --> 00:46:04,200
Speaker 1: Okay, perfect, you can spray paint.

825
00:46:04,360 --> 00:46:11,919
Speaker 3: I'll wear a sight, I'll I'll tattoo it. It's good,

826
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:16,120
Speaker 3: I'll give you a free tattoo, Lyle, I.

827
00:46:16,160 --> 00:46:17,840
Speaker 1: Don't know what I would want. I don't have any tatto.

828
00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:19,960
Speaker 1: I don't have any tattoos. I'm not a big tattoo guy.

829
00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:22,520
Speaker 2: But let me do you.

830
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:25,560
Speaker 3: Well, there's a there's probably a.

831
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:27,680
Speaker 1: Good about it on the nose, don't you think?

832
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:30,920
Speaker 3: What the get go?

833
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:31,720
Speaker 1: Yeah?

834
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, well you have a lot of time to think about.

835
00:46:35,200 --> 00:46:38,760
Speaker 1: It, right yeah, right now I'm with gorilla on the asshole,

836
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:41,680
Speaker 1: but my mind might change at some point, all right,

837
00:46:41,680 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 1: can I guys? Thank you very much?

838
00:46:43,719 --> 00:46:46,959
Speaker 3: All right, thanks bye, dude.

839
00:46:47,040 --> 00:46:51,000
Speaker 1: It's definitely They definitely spray painted therapy gecko on like

840
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:59,160
Speaker 1: some kind of fucking children's cancer research thing, and now

841
00:46:59,200 --> 00:47:02,719
Speaker 1: I'm a part of that. Hey, folks, it's Lyle. I'm

842
00:47:02,760 --> 00:47:07,520
Speaker 1: here because I'm gonna end this podcast right now with

843
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:12,879
Speaker 1: a little clip from my a series of street interviews

844
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:18,040
Speaker 1: that I did on the streets of Glasgow, Scotland. I

845
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:20,359
Speaker 1: do this thing where I go to foreign countries and

846
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:24,800
Speaker 1: set up a microphone and some chairs in various places

847
00:47:24,840 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 1: and talk to whoever is down to talk to me

848
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:30,920
Speaker 1: and I was in Glasgow and I had a really

849
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:37,960
Speaker 1: interesting interview with this guy who like just left a

850
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:46,319
Speaker 1: alcohol detox like the I guess, like minutes before he

851
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,520
Speaker 1: sat down to talk to me, and we talked for

852
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 1: a while. And after we talked, I was like, all right, listen, man,

853
00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:55,120
Speaker 1: are you sure you want me to like use all

854
00:47:55,160 --> 00:48:00,440
Speaker 1: this stuff? And he was like insisted that that he

855
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:03,840
Speaker 1: wanted to, you know, tell his history and talk about

856
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 1: this stuff. So here's a little here's a little clip

857
00:48:07,239 --> 00:48:10,200
Speaker 1: from that. If you want to see the full thing

858
00:48:10,400 --> 00:48:14,600
Speaker 1: of of my my adventures in Scotland, you can go

859
00:48:14,680 --> 00:48:18,000
Speaker 1: to YouTube dot com slash lyle forever and type in

860
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:22,399
Speaker 1: being a Gecko in Scotland and the full thing will

861
00:48:22,400 --> 00:48:24,360
Speaker 1: be there. I'll also put a link to it in

862
00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:30,680
Speaker 1: the description. So let's transport ourselves from away from a

863
00:48:30,760 --> 00:48:34,440
Speaker 1: tiny little room with no one else in it into

864
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:39,319
Speaker 1: the streets of Glasgow, Scotland. What's your what's your name? Dude?

865
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:44,160
Speaker 1: What do I want to buy that? Sorry? Man, I

866
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:50,080
Speaker 1: don't have any pounds. What's your name? What's your name?

867
00:48:50,719 --> 00:48:52,080
Speaker 5: Robbie Mark Docre?

868
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:54,480
Speaker 1: Robbie Mark Docre. What's going on with you?

869
00:48:54,520 --> 00:48:54,680
Speaker 2: Man?

870
00:48:54,719 --> 00:48:57,000
Speaker 1: What's you doing in the park today. How's it going well?

871
00:48:57,080 --> 00:49:02,440
Speaker 1: I was at the Royal the Royal Infirmary.

872
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:06,040
Speaker 5: De talking from alcohol. Oh okay, and then they wouldn't

873
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:08,960
Speaker 5: give me enough volume. Okay, so I was like this,

874
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:10,959
Speaker 5: like I just packed up my ship and then left

875
00:49:10,960 --> 00:49:11,920
Speaker 5: and then got goos.

876
00:49:12,080 --> 00:49:15,360
Speaker 1: Okay, how are you? How are you feeling in life?

877
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:15,960
Speaker 1: In general?

878
00:49:16,120 --> 00:49:19,360
Speaker 5: I feel good. I was popped up on like siamine

879
00:49:19,600 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 5: and all sorts of vet moons okay and stuff. So

880
00:49:24,760 --> 00:49:26,960
Speaker 5: I'm probably looking and feeling better than I have in

881
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:27,320
Speaker 5: a while.

882
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:31,520
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, what hmm? What what kind of stuff makes

883
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:33,479
Speaker 1: you makes you look and feel good?

884
00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:36,560
Speaker 5: What do you mean?

885
00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:39,320
Speaker 1: What's what? What makes you feel happy?

886
00:49:40,840 --> 00:49:41,160
Speaker 5: Drugs?

887
00:49:41,560 --> 00:49:42,520
Speaker 1: Okay, that's fair.

888
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:50,000
Speaker 5: Oh music, obviously they'll tell me about the music underworld

889
00:49:50,880 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 5: o dB fucking trying to think who else's Stranglers, the

890
00:49:59,280 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 5: Damned sex Pestols, uh and cet all kind of like

891
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,960
Speaker 5: nineties acid house, kind of like unknown stuff, Frankie Bones,

892
00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:13,440
Speaker 5: Yanky Bones.

893
00:50:13,560 --> 00:50:15,719
Speaker 1: Do you play music at all? Do you make any music?

894
00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:17,319
Speaker 1: What do what do you make music about?

895
00:50:17,680 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 5: I'm trained in that my mental like look at the camera,

896
00:50:21,120 --> 00:50:23,720
Speaker 5: Oh you can look wherever. Yeah, I'm training. I'm trained.

897
00:50:23,719 --> 00:50:27,360
Speaker 5: Then my mom likes to say I'm trained in classical violin,

898
00:50:28,040 --> 00:50:29,880
Speaker 5: which I am, But if you want to be a

899
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:32,520
Speaker 5: violin I wouldn't know what the fuck to do. Yeah,

900
00:50:33,760 --> 00:50:37,279
Speaker 5: but I play flam eco guitar, which is which is

901
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:37,839
Speaker 5: pretty cool.

902
00:50:38,160 --> 00:50:38,920
Speaker 1: Nice? Nice?

903
00:50:39,200 --> 00:50:43,120
Speaker 5: Why the why the green gecko suit? It's kind of

904
00:50:43,200 --> 00:50:44,319
Speaker 5: dangerous in Glasgow? You know?

905
00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:45,319
Speaker 1: Is it really? Tell me?

906
00:50:45,360 --> 00:50:49,040
Speaker 5: Why? Well? Because everything else is orange and red and blue?

907
00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:51,879
Speaker 1: Oh oh? Is it like it's a dangerous to work

908
00:50:51,920 --> 00:50:52,760
Speaker 1: green in Glasgow?

909
00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:56,520
Speaker 5: I'm kidding on. You've got you've got, you've got an army.

910
00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:59,080
Speaker 1: Okay, cool? Well, because I was gonna say, here's something

911
00:50:59,120 --> 00:51:01,080
Speaker 1: like all these places I'm going to like, you could

912
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:03,000
Speaker 1: tell me anything and I would just believe you. Like

913
00:51:03,040 --> 00:51:06,360
Speaker 1: if you told me that wearing green in Glasgow was,

914
00:51:06,440 --> 00:51:09,880
Speaker 1: like I don't know, a sign of like disrespect to

915
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:12,239
Speaker 1: the locals, I'd be like, oh shit, I gotta change.

916
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:14,400
Speaker 5: No, no, no, it's all it's just like there's so

917
00:51:14,440 --> 00:51:19,640
Speaker 5: many areas where you know, how you've got red amber green? Sure,

918
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:23,200
Speaker 5: Like there's places in Glasgow like Prickton things where they

919
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:25,520
Speaker 5: actually paint over the green.

920
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:29,840
Speaker 1: Like oh yeah, well, hey, I got a question for you.

921
00:51:30,480 --> 00:51:32,520
Speaker 1: What is your tattoo on your next I mean that

922
00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:34,600
Speaker 1: it says disconcerting smile.

923
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:37,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, so when whenever someone asked it, and then it

924
00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:39,319
Speaker 5: kind of makes you smile and it's kind of like

925
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:40,440
Speaker 5: a disconcerted smile.

926
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:44,480
Speaker 1: Oh like, whenever somebody asks you about the tattoo, it

927
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:45,920
Speaker 1: makes them smile or you no.

928
00:51:46,120 --> 00:51:49,160
Speaker 5: No, no, no no no. If someone asked me, what

929
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:52,040
Speaker 5: does this like, why do you have disconcert and smile?

930
00:51:52,520 --> 00:51:56,400
Speaker 5: Right then I can't help but like kind of smile

931
00:51:56,680 --> 00:51:59,120
Speaker 5: and it's kind of disconcerted, like I've got bad smow,

932
00:51:59,280 --> 00:51:59,520
Speaker 5: you know.

933
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:01,759
Speaker 1: I don't know why what they say you have a

934
00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:02,320
Speaker 1: bad smile.

935
00:52:03,160 --> 00:52:06,000
Speaker 5: I don't know, because I've got kind of shitty teeth.

936
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:11,840
Speaker 5: How many folks have you got on the YouTube? Don't

937
00:52:11,920 --> 00:52:13,719
Speaker 5: say like two point one million.

938
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:16,719
Speaker 1: Two point one that's not a few people watch. That's

939
00:52:16,760 --> 00:52:17,760
Speaker 1: not nothing crazy.

940
00:52:18,280 --> 00:52:21,800
Speaker 5: Okay, ask me some more questions. I like, I like questions.

941
00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:24,640
Speaker 1: All right, what's your what's your dream in life to.

942
00:52:24,600 --> 00:52:27,760
Speaker 5: Make musical can become famous and destroy the world.

943
00:52:28,040 --> 00:52:29,719
Speaker 1: Why do you want to destroy the world.

944
00:52:29,840 --> 00:52:31,000
Speaker 5: Because it's disgusting?

945
00:52:31,280 --> 00:52:33,279
Speaker 1: What do you find disgusting about the world?

946
00:52:33,480 --> 00:52:36,719
Speaker 5: And that everyone tells ship jokes and laughs at each

947
00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:40,840
Speaker 5: other's ship jokes and everyone's fake like form more people.

948
00:52:41,360 --> 00:52:44,480
Speaker 5: You know, you see everyone like like over there, like

949
00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:47,479
Speaker 5: they all set with in their you know, like little

950
00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 5: restaurants and they say like little quips, you know, and

951
00:52:52,040 --> 00:52:57,000
Speaker 5: they and they're like, you know, and and and you know,

952
00:52:57,040 --> 00:53:01,920
Speaker 5: it's just it's just like everything's just self gratulately congratulately

953
00:53:02,480 --> 00:53:07,080
Speaker 5: ego trip. There's there seems to be a lot of

954
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:10,360
Speaker 5: things that are not real anymore.

955
00:53:10,800 --> 00:53:14,440
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. You feel like the world is disgusting because

956
00:53:14,480 --> 00:53:16,120
Speaker 1: people aren't really disgusting.

957
00:53:16,280 --> 00:53:18,320
Speaker 5: I love I love late, I love life, but like

958
00:53:18,520 --> 00:53:20,279
Speaker 5: I just I just think that there's a lot of

959
00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:23,200
Speaker 5: things that there's a lot of wrongs that should be corrected.

960
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:25,759
Speaker 1: What what What are some other wrongs that you feel

961
00:53:25,800 --> 00:53:26,560
Speaker 1: should be corrected.

962
00:53:28,239 --> 00:53:33,239
Speaker 5: I don't know people that have like girls that have

963
00:53:33,360 --> 00:53:37,080
Speaker 5: short hair and it's like colored. I don't like that.

964
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:39,120
Speaker 1: But you, I mean you got color, you got like

965
00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:40,120
Speaker 1: colored tattoos.

966
00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:42,520
Speaker 5: Yeah, I know. I drew myself. I've also got like

967
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:45,680
Speaker 5: cuts of arms. I did that myself too.

968
00:53:46,160 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 1: M hmm. All right, So your dream in life is

969
00:53:48,080 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 1: to destroy the world, make music and and uh kind

970
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:54,160
Speaker 1: of hang out. What do you think about all day?

971
00:53:58,719 --> 00:54:02,320
Speaker 5: What do I think about old? That's a good question.

972
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:07,680
Speaker 5: I'm actually trying to answer your questions. Yea, genuinely, Well

973
00:54:07,840 --> 00:54:12,320
Speaker 5: what do I think about all day? I think about

974
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:21,080
Speaker 5: my struggle with alcohol and how I love it though,

975
00:54:21,840 --> 00:54:26,440
Speaker 5: and then I'm kind of like torn between, you know,

976
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:29,400
Speaker 5: should I love it or should I hate it? I

977
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:33,640
Speaker 5: think I think, I think, I think that there's there's

978
00:54:33,680 --> 00:54:37,319
Speaker 5: a thing do you know where the comedian patris O Neil. Yeah, right,

979
00:54:37,400 --> 00:54:40,359
Speaker 5: so he said, have your opinions, but don't let your

980
00:54:40,520 --> 00:54:42,840
Speaker 5: own your opinions, but don't let your opinions on you.

981
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 5: I think there's a lot of things in life where,

982
00:54:46,239 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 5: you know, like people like they let they let things

983
00:54:48,680 --> 00:54:51,960
Speaker 5: on them without realizing it. Like you know, for example,

984
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:56,080
Speaker 5: if you have like a drug problem and you you

985
00:54:56,239 --> 00:55:02,080
Speaker 5: have total abstinence, you you know, and you go, oh,

986
00:55:02,200 --> 00:55:05,160
Speaker 5: this is my fourteenth fear sober, this is my twenty

987
00:55:05,200 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 5: eight fear sober. You're still kind of fucking controlled by it. Yeah,

988
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:12,319
Speaker 5: you're not doing it, you know. So Like I mean,

989
00:55:12,360 --> 00:55:14,000
Speaker 5: I think a little bit of balance. I don't know,

990
00:55:14,160 --> 00:55:15,200
Speaker 5: that's that's just my viewing.

991
00:55:15,239 --> 00:55:17,920
Speaker 1: No, No, that's I understand. I understand where that viewpoint

992
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:20,200
Speaker 1: comes from. It's like if you're like.

993
00:55:20,760 --> 00:55:21,759
Speaker 5: You're still controlled by it.

994
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:26,280
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, like like if you're whether you're a total

995
00:55:26,320 --> 00:55:29,719
Speaker 1: abstination or total engulfing and it it's still has some

996
00:55:30,120 --> 00:55:31,520
Speaker 1: form of power in your life. Yeah.

997
00:55:31,719 --> 00:55:34,760
Speaker 5: And also one but just one more thing because probably

998
00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:37,319
Speaker 5: these guys like hate me and what like one mate

999
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:39,600
Speaker 5: stopped talking but no, no, no place. But I think

1000
00:55:39,680 --> 00:55:43,080
Speaker 5: people should people should train themselves to try and talk

1001
00:55:43,239 --> 00:55:49,560
Speaker 5: slower because language is so integral to like your psychology,

1002
00:55:50,239 --> 00:55:53,080
Speaker 5: and if you can slow down how you speak, you

1003
00:55:53,200 --> 00:55:55,919
Speaker 5: can appreciate things a lot better and you can see

1004
00:55:55,960 --> 00:55:59,160
Speaker 5: a lot more. Like for example, you know, like the

1005
00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:01,200
Speaker 5: other week, I'll stay bananas. I was looking at the

1006
00:56:01,239 --> 00:56:04,520
Speaker 5: window listening to music and like a sparrow came and

1007
00:56:04,640 --> 00:56:08,520
Speaker 5: like hit like a bush. They can like bounced off it.

1008
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:11,880
Speaker 5: Or there's like do you not a worthy giguess? You

1009
00:56:11,960 --> 00:56:13,080
Speaker 5: guys know what a worthy giggess?

1010
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:13,360
Speaker 3: You know what?

1011
00:56:14,320 --> 00:56:17,279
Speaker 5: Like washing on It's like those little things are like

1012
00:56:17,360 --> 00:56:20,600
Speaker 5: shaped like squares and like yeah, so like there's this

1013
00:56:20,719 --> 00:56:23,040
Speaker 5: old woman and her husband died a few years ago.

1014
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:26,560
Speaker 5: She lives behind us, so like our garden's kind of

1015
00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:29,400
Speaker 5: like a little bit like scwed and there was a

1016
00:56:29,520 --> 00:56:31,680
Speaker 5: crow landed on it. And it's fun like all the

1017
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:35,480
Speaker 5: way around. So I think slow your life down so

1018
00:56:35,680 --> 00:56:38,880
Speaker 5: that you can appreciate just like little things like that.

1019
00:56:39,960 --> 00:56:43,520
Speaker 5: I think that's the most meaningful kind of shit.

1020
00:56:45,120 --> 00:56:45,360
Speaker 2: Do you.

1021
00:56:49,040 --> 00:56:49,359
Speaker 5: Do you make?

1022
00:56:49,560 --> 00:56:52,040
Speaker 1: Do you record music at all? Okay?

1023
00:56:52,160 --> 00:56:56,879
Speaker 5: Yeah, and it's not it's not. It's not like honey

1024
00:56:56,880 --> 00:56:59,520
Speaker 5: about in live where you can create you know, like

1025
00:56:59,600 --> 00:57:02,840
Speaker 5: a drum like you know, like a drum set, and

1026
00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 5: you know like cut and paste it and add it on.

1027
00:57:05,239 --> 00:57:09,080
Speaker 5: You know, everything's recorded live through like a focused right

1028
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:14,240
Speaker 5: interface and it's very kind of like balayriic and my idea.

1029
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:18,440
Speaker 5: Just get it out there to whoever's listening and watching.

1030
00:57:19,040 --> 00:57:20,840
Speaker 5: And I'm not doing it because no one else has

1031
00:57:20,840 --> 00:57:23,200
Speaker 5: ever done it. I'm doing it because it comes natural.

1032
00:57:24,320 --> 00:57:28,280
Speaker 5: But I'm gonna do like a an album that has

1033
00:57:28,840 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 5: a core progression, but then it kind of differs from

1034
00:57:31,800 --> 00:57:34,760
Speaker 5: it and then returns back to it, okay a few

1035
00:57:34,840 --> 00:57:40,640
Speaker 5: times accompanied by a visual you know, things that are

1036
00:57:40,720 --> 00:57:44,840
Speaker 5: kind of like postmodern, you know, because I hate postmodernism.

1037
00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:48,000
Speaker 5: So you know, for example, you know that like that

1038
00:57:48,160 --> 00:57:51,280
Speaker 5: seagull flying flying by a tree, a clip of that,

1039
00:57:52,680 --> 00:57:54,440
Speaker 5: and then a clup of a child like running, and

1040
00:57:54,560 --> 00:57:56,680
Speaker 5: then a clip of like a bomb hitting it, like

1041
00:57:56,800 --> 00:57:58,880
Speaker 5: hitting a rack, and then you know, a clup of

1042
00:57:58,920 --> 00:58:02,880
Speaker 5: a whale up jump, you know, everything happening at one time. Yeah,

1043
00:58:03,080 --> 00:58:05,320
Speaker 5: and you know, like a coagulation of reality.

1044
00:58:05,560 --> 00:58:06,880
Speaker 1: I want to ask you, I want to go back

1045
00:58:06,920 --> 00:58:09,919
Speaker 1: real quick to you. You you talked about like slowing down,

1046
00:58:10,680 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 1: Like is this a reason this this kind of realization

1047
00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:15,160
Speaker 1: you made of like, oh, I want to slow down

1048
00:58:15,200 --> 00:58:17,600
Speaker 1: a little bit more, And is that a recent thing?

1049
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:20,360
Speaker 1: Is that a recent realization you've come to And if so,

1050
00:58:20,600 --> 00:58:21,960
Speaker 1: what made you come to that realization?

1051
00:58:22,560 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 5: I think in the past few years I developed a

1052
00:58:26,680 --> 00:58:29,920
Speaker 5: lot of things that I'd never experienced before that were

1053
00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:34,040
Speaker 5: new to me, and they were a whole oh yeah,

1054
00:58:34,240 --> 00:58:39,000
Speaker 5: oh yeah, right, like they were they were foreign to me.

1055
00:58:39,120 --> 00:58:42,240
Speaker 5: Therefore I was afraid of them. But just because something's

1056
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:44,160
Speaker 5: foreign to you, it doesn't mean you should be afraid

1057
00:58:44,160 --> 00:58:47,280
Speaker 5: of it. You should fears your friend, not your enemy. Yeah,

1058
00:58:48,800 --> 00:58:52,600
Speaker 5: And so like you know, like when these kind of

1059
00:58:52,680 --> 00:58:56,480
Speaker 5: things happened, you know, like I developed a stutter when

1060
00:58:56,520 --> 00:58:58,960
Speaker 5: I'm stressed, you know, I get like a like a

1061
00:58:59,080 --> 00:59:02,160
Speaker 5: choke in my throat. That was really scary the first

1062
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:05,680
Speaker 5: time I happened, but it doesn't scare me anymore. But

1063
00:59:05,800 --> 00:59:10,080
Speaker 5: I learned that the slower that I spoke, the more

1064
00:59:10,240 --> 00:59:14,360
Speaker 5: it kind of changed my psychology and the way that

1065
00:59:14,440 --> 00:59:17,040
Speaker 5: I looked at things. You know, if someone is erratic

1066
00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:21,240
Speaker 5: and sped up and he speaking, you know, you know

1067
00:59:21,800 --> 00:59:24,200
Speaker 5: all they're thinking of is themselves. We've seen themselves in

1068
00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:28,000
Speaker 5: the mirror constantly, well you know, while they're talking. Whereas

1069
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:31,560
Speaker 5: if you sow yourself down you can self express, and

1070
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:33,640
Speaker 5: you know, you can you can actually see what's in

1071
00:59:33,720 --> 00:59:38,280
Speaker 5: front of you. M hm, that's what I think, m hm,

1072
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:41,320
Speaker 5: mister gecko.

1073
00:59:41,680 --> 00:59:44,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, what do you have a do have a job?

1074
00:59:44,440 --> 00:59:45,840
Speaker 1: Do you go to school? Do you do anything like that?

1075
00:59:46,080 --> 00:59:46,120
Speaker 3: No?

1076
00:59:46,240 --> 00:59:49,000
Speaker 5: I'm on l c w RA, which is Limited Capability

1077
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:52,840
Speaker 5: for work and work related activity, which means that I

1078
00:59:53,040 --> 00:59:56,840
Speaker 5: receive well from that. Anyway, I received six hundred pounds

1079
00:59:56,840 --> 00:59:59,960
Speaker 5: a month for doing Sweet Fuck Call, and it's great

1080
01:00:00,400 --> 01:00:09,760
Speaker 5: because it's free money and also disability elements because of

1081
01:00:11,040 --> 01:00:16,600
Speaker 5: anxiety and bipolar, like generalized the anxiety, not like just normal.

1082
01:00:17,880 --> 01:00:21,280
Speaker 1: So so you came you came here from from like

1083
01:00:21,320 --> 01:00:22,760
Speaker 1: a detaxing Yeah.

1084
01:00:22,600 --> 01:00:25,440
Speaker 5: I came from here from hospital. I left. I just

1085
01:00:25,880 --> 01:00:28,840
Speaker 5: I packed up and said fuck this because I was shaking,

1086
01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:30,480
Speaker 5: like like like like.

1087
01:00:30,560 --> 01:00:32,640
Speaker 1: Really really shaking. It was withdrawn.

1088
01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:33,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1089
01:00:33,280 --> 01:00:33,520
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1090
01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:36,160
Speaker 5: And then the doctor when he just didn't give a fuck,

1091
01:00:36,200 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 5: he cared more like I said, about his beard and

1092
01:00:38,360 --> 01:00:42,040
Speaker 5: like looking good than me. And so I thought, if

1093
01:00:42,080 --> 01:00:45,160
Speaker 5: someone if someone in life, as far as I'm concerned,

1094
01:00:45,280 --> 01:00:48,640
Speaker 5: oh ship, sorry, right, yeah, I'm fine as far as

1095
01:00:48,680 --> 01:00:51,880
Speaker 5: I'm concerned. If if someone in life, right is so

1096
01:00:52,200 --> 01:00:56,040
Speaker 5: ego driven and you tried to have a truthful conversation

1097
01:00:56,240 --> 01:00:59,440
Speaker 5: with them, and you're not going to get a truthful

1098
01:00:59,520 --> 01:01:03,120
Speaker 5: response because their regal driven.

1099
01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:04,160
Speaker 1: You know.

1100
01:01:05,160 --> 01:01:09,600
Speaker 5: So for example, if this man thought that, you know,

1101
01:01:09,920 --> 01:01:13,000
Speaker 5: he is always going to be correct and he's never

1102
01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:16,800
Speaker 5: gonna listen to me, and I'm just this, you know whatever,

1103
01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:21,000
Speaker 5: this patient and he's the main guys, he's the star

1104
01:01:21,120 --> 01:01:23,680
Speaker 5: of the show, he's the main character in his movie.

1105
01:01:26,920 --> 01:01:29,800
Speaker 5: You know, I like, I kind of thought to myself, Roberte,

1106
01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:32,960
Speaker 5: you could explain the truth, you know, you could explain

1107
01:01:33,000 --> 01:01:37,640
Speaker 5: to him that, you know, drinking twelve liters of cider

1108
01:01:37,760 --> 01:01:41,000
Speaker 5: a day and not eating and not sleeping and having

1109
01:01:41,120 --> 01:01:44,760
Speaker 5: half bottles of vodka in between that for years and

1110
01:01:44,840 --> 01:01:48,320
Speaker 5: years and years requires a little bit more than twenty

1111
01:01:48,400 --> 01:01:54,840
Speaker 5: milligrams of dazepam. He would take that as an ego

1112
01:01:55,000 --> 01:01:58,520
Speaker 5: kind of insult, almost as if I was telling him

1113
01:01:58,640 --> 01:01:59,120
Speaker 5: his job.

1114
01:01:59,480 --> 01:02:01,960
Speaker 1: Sure, and you know.

1115
01:02:03,440 --> 01:02:08,640
Speaker 5: Essentially yeah, and so I just I just I gave off.

1116
01:02:08,680 --> 01:02:11,000
Speaker 5: I just piped everything up and and laughed And I

1117
01:02:11,080 --> 01:02:13,120
Speaker 5: didn't even discharge myself. I just laughed.

1118
01:02:14,240 --> 01:02:16,360
Speaker 1: You know, you seem like you're you're a smart guy.

1119
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:20,320
Speaker 1: You're thinking a lot about uh, the camera, Oh shore,

1120
01:02:20,320 --> 01:02:20,640
Speaker 1: what is that?

1121
01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:23,480
Speaker 5: It's my cross that Chiro with me everywhere?

1122
01:02:25,240 --> 01:02:25,560
Speaker 1: Oh is that?

1123
01:02:25,680 --> 01:02:25,840
Speaker 5: Who?

1124
01:02:25,880 --> 01:02:27,760
Speaker 1: Where's where's your homie at? They gave that to you?

1125
01:02:28,560 --> 01:02:28,760
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1126
01:02:28,840 --> 01:02:34,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, were there? So like when you said you were, like,

1127
01:02:35,560 --> 01:02:39,480
Speaker 1: there's there's that kind of tough dichotomy of like if

1128
01:02:39,520 --> 01:02:41,880
Speaker 1: you're drinking all the time, then it's got a hold

1129
01:02:41,920 --> 01:02:43,960
Speaker 1: of you, but also if you're completely upstaining, then it's

1130
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:46,200
Speaker 1: got a hold of you. And you're thinking about like,

1131
01:02:46,280 --> 01:02:49,920
Speaker 1: because I assume you have, like you know, desires to

1132
01:02:50,120 --> 01:02:52,120
Speaker 1: to want to try to live like the best kind

1133
01:02:52,160 --> 01:02:55,920
Speaker 1: of life you can for yourself, Like how are you

1134
01:02:55,960 --> 01:02:57,640
Speaker 1: how do you how are you thinking about your situation?

1135
01:02:57,800 --> 01:03:00,680
Speaker 1: Moving forward, Like, what do you think is the best

1136
01:03:00,720 --> 01:03:02,840
Speaker 1: way of moving forward for you to be happy and

1137
01:03:02,920 --> 01:03:05,440
Speaker 1: live a good life and do what's right for you.

1138
01:03:05,960 --> 01:03:09,840
Speaker 5: I would say to be unconditional and for you to

1139
01:03:09,960 --> 01:03:12,320
Speaker 5: not think about yourself, to think about others and your

1140
01:03:12,400 --> 01:03:18,200
Speaker 5: relationships with others. And if you can maintain a lifestyle

1141
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:24,040
Speaker 5: that you like and with and either benefit or not

1142
01:03:24,200 --> 01:03:28,720
Speaker 5: affect negatively other people, then that's kind of what you

1143
01:03:28,800 --> 01:03:29,400
Speaker 5: want toam for.

1144
01:03:31,240 --> 01:03:31,400
Speaker 1: You know.

1145
01:03:31,840 --> 01:03:41,560
Speaker 5: For example, you know, like I love alcohol, but you know,

1146
01:03:41,720 --> 01:03:44,680
Speaker 5: there there comes a point where you're not drinking to

1147
01:03:44,760 --> 01:03:48,360
Speaker 5: get drunk anymore. You're drinking to feel normal. So you

1148
01:03:48,480 --> 01:03:51,160
Speaker 5: have to keep it real and you know, and you

1149
01:03:51,240 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 5: have to you have to be honest with yourself. And

1150
01:03:53,960 --> 01:03:56,800
Speaker 5: you know, there's like if there's one thing that I've

1151
01:03:56,880 --> 01:04:00,240
Speaker 5: learned and I always always tell older sis or this,

1152
01:04:02,680 --> 01:04:06,560
Speaker 5: see the moments in life where you where you stop

1153
01:04:06,840 --> 01:04:09,520
Speaker 5: and you kind of put your head between your legs

1154
01:04:09,600 --> 01:04:12,920
Speaker 5: and you know kind of like shake your head and

1155
01:04:13,040 --> 01:04:16,600
Speaker 5: maybe cry or you go, like, for example, I would go, Robbie,

1156
01:04:17,360 --> 01:04:21,400
Speaker 5: this is fucking bad, man, this is bad. Those are

1157
01:04:21,440 --> 01:04:24,320
Speaker 5: the moments in life that are the best moments in

1158
01:04:24,440 --> 01:04:29,040
Speaker 5: life because they're true. You know, that's that's your self actualizing.

1159
01:04:29,640 --> 01:04:33,960
Speaker 5: You're no longer being a selfish, you know, self fulfilling

1160
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:37,360
Speaker 5: you know, human being. You're you're you're being something out

1161
01:04:37,440 --> 01:04:39,520
Speaker 5: with that. You know, you're being what you're intended to be,

1162
01:04:40,600 --> 01:04:45,160
Speaker 5: which is you know, a good a good person that

1163
01:04:45,240 --> 01:04:48,600
Speaker 5: doesn't just live for yourself but lives for other people,

1164
01:04:49,080 --> 01:04:52,960
Speaker 5: you know. So like I just I believe in self

1165
01:04:53,040 --> 01:04:59,240
Speaker 5: actualization and you can achieve self actualization very easily purely

1166
01:04:59,520 --> 01:05:04,600
Speaker 5: just ba. I am balance, you know, and like I

1167
01:05:04,680 --> 01:05:10,080
Speaker 5: always say, life wouldn't be so beautiful if it wasn't

1168
01:05:10,120 --> 01:05:14,840
Speaker 5: so painful. Yeah, okay, and that's not that's not some

1169
01:05:15,160 --> 01:05:19,280
Speaker 5: kind of you know, sound good, sound bait, you know,

1170
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:24,520
Speaker 5: saying or whatever. You know, you know, whatever the case

1171
01:05:24,560 --> 01:05:26,120
Speaker 5: may be, it's as true.

1172
01:05:26,240 --> 01:05:26,800
Speaker 3: You know, like.

1173
01:05:29,760 --> 01:05:30,160
Speaker 1: You know you.

1174
01:05:31,760 --> 01:05:33,320
Speaker 5: Life has to be painful, you know.

1175
01:05:34,000 --> 01:05:36,720
Speaker 1: Can I ask who are like, like, when you're thinking about,

1176
01:05:37,800 --> 01:05:40,640
Speaker 1: you know, the other people in your life that you

1177
01:05:40,800 --> 01:05:43,880
Speaker 1: want to like be there for and try to help

1178
01:05:43,960 --> 01:05:46,280
Speaker 1: out in the context of all these things you're saying, like,

1179
01:05:46,880 --> 01:05:48,960
Speaker 1: who would those people be? Do you have people like that?

1180
01:05:49,320 --> 01:05:55,040
Speaker 5: Well? I am I struggle with that one because sorry,

1181
01:05:55,040 --> 01:05:58,640
Speaker 5: I keep on holding it so far away. I struggle

1182
01:05:58,680 --> 01:06:03,160
Speaker 5: with that one because I think that I would love,

1183
01:06:03,360 --> 01:06:07,200
Speaker 5: I would love to be successful and for my children

1184
01:06:08,160 --> 01:06:11,360
Speaker 5: and my nieces and nephews if I have any in

1185
01:06:11,400 --> 01:06:15,480
Speaker 5: the future, and their children to be looked after. But

1186
01:06:15,600 --> 01:06:18,560
Speaker 5: I was my happiest when I had no money. And

1187
01:06:18,680 --> 01:06:20,960
Speaker 5: I'm not I'm not talking about that in a kind

1188
01:06:21,000 --> 01:06:24,480
Speaker 5: of terrifaden, you know, biddest kind of sense. I just mean,

1189
01:06:25,280 --> 01:06:29,440
Speaker 5: you know, when I had no money, when I had

1190
01:06:29,480 --> 01:06:31,720
Speaker 5: no money for some reason, I was, I was happy.

1191
01:06:33,920 --> 01:06:36,960
Speaker 5: So you know, like so ROBO's question again.

1192
01:06:38,480 --> 01:06:40,480
Speaker 1: Forget sorry man. So so I'm talking about like you

1193
01:06:40,720 --> 01:06:42,560
Speaker 1: talked about, like really wanting to like live life like

1194
01:06:42,720 --> 01:06:44,840
Speaker 1: not for yourself and all that stuff. And that's kind

1195
01:06:44,840 --> 01:06:47,680
Speaker 1: of what self actualization is. Who are some people in

1196
01:06:47,760 --> 01:06:48,160
Speaker 1: your life?

1197
01:06:48,200 --> 01:06:50,320
Speaker 5: Who I mean if you look at like like have

1198
01:06:50,400 --> 01:06:53,760
Speaker 5: you ever watched it like Ozie Osbourne and his kids now?

1199
01:06:53,840 --> 01:06:58,000
Speaker 5: And okay, so Osborne sick, Yeah, but like he see

1200
01:06:58,480 --> 01:07:02,320
Speaker 5: his kid Jack TV shows a little shit, you know

1201
01:07:02,320 --> 01:07:04,120
Speaker 5: what I mean, because he gets everything he wants, and

1202
01:07:04,520 --> 01:07:09,880
Speaker 5: you know, we like like they're not treated like, you know,

1203
01:07:10,040 --> 01:07:14,880
Speaker 5: as if they're like actual children. So what would I

1204
01:07:15,000 --> 01:07:19,560
Speaker 5: want for people I would like for just to get

1205
01:07:19,600 --> 01:07:27,720
Speaker 5: this on camera. I would like a non utilitarianist, non nihilist,

1206
01:07:29,280 --> 01:07:35,520
Speaker 5: non godless society where you don't just count on balancing

1207
01:07:35,640 --> 01:07:39,360
Speaker 5: good against evil and you actually just kind of have

1208
01:07:39,560 --> 01:07:43,200
Speaker 5: faith in the process of things and realize that there

1209
01:07:43,280 --> 01:07:46,840
Speaker 5: is nothing new under the sun. I'm not a Bible batter,

1210
01:07:47,680 --> 01:07:49,640
Speaker 5: but I think that people worry about a lot of

1211
01:07:49,680 --> 01:07:52,160
Speaker 5: things that they shouldn't worry about. Everything always seems to

1212
01:07:52,320 --> 01:07:56,720
Speaker 5: solve itself in one way or another, you know. And

1213
01:07:56,800 --> 01:07:59,000
Speaker 5: you could say, well, what if what if I got

1214
01:07:59,080 --> 01:08:02,520
Speaker 5: diagnosed with pink creatic cancer right now? If I got

1215
01:08:02,600 --> 01:08:04,680
Speaker 5: diagnosed with pancreatic cancer right now, I don't know what

1216
01:08:04,720 --> 01:08:07,040
Speaker 5: I would do, But part of me kind of thinks

1217
01:08:07,040 --> 01:08:10,640
Speaker 5: I would laugh, because God has a sense of cure

1218
01:08:11,880 --> 01:08:15,280
Speaker 5: and me professing all these things, acting like a smart

1219
01:08:15,360 --> 01:08:19,720
Speaker 5: guy when I'm not really, I'm just a human being. Like,

1220
01:08:19,840 --> 01:08:22,160
Speaker 5: don't listen to a single word that I said. It

1221
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:25,640
Speaker 5: just sounds good, or I hope it sounds good, but

1222
01:08:25,800 --> 01:08:29,360
Speaker 5: I just sound good. That's it. People are just good

1223
01:08:29,360 --> 01:08:30,120
Speaker 5: at sounding good.

1224
01:08:31,080 --> 01:08:34,160
Speaker 1: What's your name again, man, Robbie, Robbie, nice to read you,

1225
01:08:34,280 --> 01:08:37,040
Speaker 1: Rabbi man, what's uh Is there anything else do you

1226
01:08:37,080 --> 01:08:39,240
Speaker 1: want to say to the people of the computer before

1227
01:08:39,280 --> 01:08:42,040
Speaker 1: we go, any final thoughts, feelings of sentiments.

1228
01:08:42,400 --> 01:08:46,800
Speaker 5: I love you mum, I love your dad. This isn't

1229
01:08:46,840 --> 01:08:49,400
Speaker 5: a suicide message. It's just a normal message.

1230
01:08:52,240 --> 01:08:54,680
Speaker 1: Good man, what do you do? What are you doing

1231
01:08:54,720 --> 01:08:55,400
Speaker 1: the rest of the day?

1232
01:08:57,080 --> 01:08:59,679
Speaker 5: I don't know, drinking and probably getting sectioned.

1233
01:09:01,439 --> 01:09:05,519
Speaker 1: I have a going around all right. By the way,

1234
01:09:05,560 --> 01:09:09,400
Speaker 1: you are not the first person to say that was Oliver.

1235
01:09:10,920 --> 01:09:13,280
Speaker 1: That's how who's Oliver read?

1236
01:09:15,640 --> 01:09:15,760
Speaker 2: Uh?

1237
01:09:16,080 --> 01:09:18,960
Speaker 1: Not really? Okay, I'll have to look him up. I

1238
01:09:19,080 --> 01:09:19,680
Speaker 1: have to look him up.

1239
01:09:20,680 --> 01:09:21,000
Speaker 5: All right.

1240
01:09:23,560 --> 01:09:32,320
Speaker 1: Oh, it's Lyle forever. Don't don't forget the fake bracelet thing?

1241
01:09:44,360 --> 01:09:44,559
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1242
01:09:44,680 --> 01:09:50,240
Speaker 1: Is that? Is that? Is that okay with you? Okay? Cool? Yeah,

1243
01:09:50,280 --> 01:09:52,960
Speaker 1: I'll probably put it on YouTube at some point. Yeah,

1244
01:09:53,000 --> 01:09:55,080
Speaker 1: I'll put it on YouTube at some point. Do you

1245
01:09:55,200 --> 01:09:56,760
Speaker 1: are you cool with me showing all you want me

1246
01:09:56,840 --> 01:10:00,280
Speaker 1: to blur your face or anything like that? All right,

1247
01:10:00,360 --> 01:10:05,800
Speaker 1: let's do it, all right, man? That one I won't

1248
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:09,559
Speaker 1: sign off on. Hey, hey, nice mate, your Robbie take

1249
01:10:09,600 --> 01:10:12,439
Speaker 1: care of god Buster too, man, you take care you know,

1250
01:10:12,520 --> 01:10:15,400
Speaker 1: it's interesting thinking about what he said about you know,

1251
01:10:15,840 --> 01:10:20,280
Speaker 1: if whether whether you're completely abstaining from something or completely

1252
01:10:21,040 --> 01:10:24,840
Speaker 1: engaged in something. It has a hold on you. That's

1253
01:10:24,920 --> 01:10:27,160
Speaker 1: interesting to think about. I have my own vices, I

1254
01:10:27,280 --> 01:10:30,640
Speaker 1: have my own things. Now alcohol is not really one

1255
01:10:30,680 --> 01:10:33,800
Speaker 1: of them, you know, but fucking I mean, I was

1256
01:10:33,840 --> 01:10:37,160
Speaker 1: talking about eating Hamburger flavored potato chips, and that definitely

1257
01:10:37,320 --> 01:10:40,400
Speaker 1: is one of them. And I don't know, it was

1258
01:10:40,479 --> 01:10:43,479
Speaker 1: interesting talking to that guy. He seemed like, seemed like

1259
01:10:43,520 --> 01:10:46,360
Speaker 1: a smart dude. He seemed like, you know, he was

1260
01:10:46,360 --> 01:10:48,479
Speaker 1: struggling with some stuff, but that he also had a

1261
01:10:51,600 --> 01:10:58,080
Speaker 1: I don't know, some I will his his pessimism was

1262
01:10:58,120 --> 01:11:01,280
Speaker 1: sprinkled with notes of optimism. I think, at least it's

1263
01:11:01,320 --> 01:11:03,280
Speaker 1: my interpretation of it. And he seems like it's a

1264
01:11:03,439 --> 01:11:05,680
Speaker 1: nice guy and the sweet guy and a guy with

1265
01:11:05,760 --> 01:11:07,719
Speaker 1: good intentions. And I wish him well and I hope

1266
01:11:07,760 --> 01:11:12,519
Speaker 1: that he eventually, you know, does whatever is the best

1267
01:11:13,320 --> 01:11:15,479
Speaker 1: option for him in his life. And I hope he

1268
01:11:15,560 --> 01:11:18,400
Speaker 1: doesn't discover the wopp or flavored potato chips, because that

1269
01:11:18,439 --> 01:11:21,920
Speaker 1: will just sink him deeper into some kind of hole.

1270
01:11:22,720 --> 01:11:27,479
Speaker 1: And I hope, I hope he sells that bracelet to someone. Maybe.

1271
01:11:29,360 --> 01:11:33,040
Speaker 1: Thank you, Robbie, God bless your really kid goes on

1272
01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:36,920
Speaker 1: the line taking your phone calls every night. Everything can

1273
01:11:37,120 --> 01:11:39,519
Speaker 1: goes to a ride who's teaching you about in the

1274
01:11:39,560 --> 01:11:42,880
Speaker 1: midt of your life, but he's not really an expert.