Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. These
Speaker 1: eight are quizzlings, tradeorse, cowards, capitulators, collaborators, fakes, frauds, enablers, betrayers, failures,
Speaker 1: political prostitutes. Last night, eight senators, nominal Democrats, voted to fold,
Speaker 1: without any pressure, without any bribe, without any anything. They
Speaker 1: voted to kick millions of Americans off Obamacare in order
Speaker 1: to reopen and fund the government to reopen it for
Speaker 1: only three months. Mind you, So we have to go
Speaker 1: through this again in exchange, not for magic beans this time,
Speaker 1: but just for the promise of a vote in which
Speaker 1: they might get magic beans, A vote on the healthcare subsidies,
Speaker 1: which they will win if half a dozen Republicans defy Trump,
Speaker 1: a vote on magic beans, which they will lose. Eight
Speaker 1: of them, six Democrats, the independent Angus King of Maine,
Speaker 1: who caucused with Democrats until last night, apparently, and John Fetterman.
Speaker 1: You cannot recall a senator in Pennsylvania and anyway, that
Speaker 1: would not be enough for Fetterman. He should be institutionalized,
Speaker 1: or worse, he should be sold on waivers to Maga.
Speaker 1: His mind is that unsound, f you Fetterman. The other
Speaker 1: traders whose careers in the Senate, in the Democratic Party,
Speaker 1: in public life must now end are Senator Dick Durbin
Speaker 1: of Illinois. Senator Limp Dick Durbin never someone to sit
Speaker 1: around and fight when an opera tunity would arise to
Speaker 1: give in. Senator Maggie Hassen of New Hampshire, who, in
Speaker 1: betraying America, had the nerve to say she was doing
Speaker 1: so to quote, make sure the government is functioning and
Speaker 1: continue the fight to a realistic platform to get the
Speaker 1: premium tax cuts done. If that is not successful, then
Speaker 1: shame on the Republican Party and shame on Donald Trump. No,
Speaker 1: shame on you, miss Hassen, you useless clown. Republicans do
Speaker 1: not feel shame. Trump has no human emotions, You have
Speaker 1: no intelligence. You have been played by shameless people who
Speaker 1: you think will feel shame. Get the f out. Senator
Speaker 1: Jean Shaheen of New Hampshire, who for most of us,
Speaker 1: for the first time, has made us realize that she
Speaker 1: and Maggie Hassen are not the same person. They might
Speaker 1: as well be. What do you say to your colleagues
Speaker 1: who say this isn't a fight, this is a capitulation.
Speaker 1: She was asked last night. She answers, we have a
Speaker 1: guaranteed vote by a guaranteed date, which you imbecile, you
Speaker 1: are certain to lose. You traded a stalemate where the
Speaker 1: other side was beginning to crack for a total defeat.
Speaker 1: Get the f out of our party, Senator Catherine Cortes Mastow,
Speaker 1: it's our responsibility to work not only here amongst ourselves,
Speaker 1: but across the aisle, to solve these problems for the Americans,
Speaker 1: make their lives a little bit easier. I gather, Senator
Speaker 1: Cortez Mastow, You've never actually been to the Senate or
Speaker 1: to Washington, where there is no isle. There's just a
Speaker 1: moat full of swamp creatures that Trump owns, and there
Speaker 1: is no problem solving to be done with the other side.
Speaker 1: The other side is just a series of whores for Trump,
Speaker 1: whores for Trump with which you are now attached. Senator
Speaker 1: Jackie Rosen of Nevada quote, Senate Republicans need to work
Speaker 1: with us in a bipartisan way before the next deadline.
Speaker 2: Un quote.
Speaker 1: I hate to break this to you, Senator Jackie, but
Speaker 1: they won't. You have deluded yourself, You have sold your
Speaker 1: constituents out your only honorable course is to resign your
Speaker 1: office today. And lastly, there is Senator Tim Kine of Virginia,
Speaker 1: who has been essentially a zombie since he went through
Speaker 1: an entire presidential campaign without ever really noticing once that
Speaker 1: he was the vice presidential nominee. Useless, at least he's consistent.
Speaker 1: Counting Fetterman, there are seven nominal Democrats there, and they
Speaker 1: need to be expelled from the party. And those that
Speaker 1: mysticularly think they have a chance of retaining their seats
Speaker 1: must be primaried and defeated must be The seven and
Speaker 1: Angus King are dead to us. They are not progressives,
Speaker 1: they are not pragmatists. They are not even moderates. They
Speaker 1: are simply gold plated, hot and cold running fools. Their
Speaker 1: careers must be ended now. Durban, Kane, Fetterman, shen Cortes, Mascow, Hassen, Rosen,
Speaker 1: and King now done forgotten. Let us hear their names
Speaker 1: no more. And as to the Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer,
Speaker 1: who voted against this bill the rare occasion where he
Speaker 1: voted correctly, this bill will now sail through the House
Speaker 1: and give Trump what he wants and gut Obama Care
Speaker 1: and then we get to do this all over again
Speaker 1: in February, when they're Republicans will have seen only Democratic
Speaker 1: weakness and how they can plow through these eight ghosts
Speaker 1: in the Democratic Senate Caucus. As to Chuck Schumer, minority leader,
Speaker 1: who could not keep even half of these bereft, disingenuous, untrustworthy,
Speaker 1: uselessfeckless Democratic Senate assholes in line, Chuck Schumer's time in
Speaker 1: this role must come to an end. One of the
Speaker 1: responsibilities of Senate leadership is to make wandering members of
Speaker 1: your own party realize that it doesn't really matter where
Speaker 1: their principles might sit or what they think they're going
Speaker 1: to do with their careers, but they must realize at
Speaker 1: all times that, no matter how good and just you
Speaker 1: may be, they must know that if they go to
Speaker 1: talk to the enemy in the middle of a war
Speaker 1: and cut a deal with the enemy, they are likely
Speaker 1: to be metaphorically shot in the back by you, then
Speaker 1: and already leader. Which did not happen, Chuck Schumer, You
Speaker 1: presided as your party, got a promise of a vote
Speaker 1: on extending the Obamacare subsidies, a promise of a vote,
Speaker 1: a promise for a vote, which you will lose. Getting
Speaker 1: a promise from a Republican is simply exactly the same
Speaker 1: thing as not getting a promise from a Republican. And
Speaker 1: now it is also the same thing as getting a
Speaker 1: promise from Durban, Kane, Feederman, Shaheen, Cortes, Mascow, Hassen, rosenand King,
Speaker 1: and to hell with each of them. As if this
Speaker 1: could be more infuriating than it already is. There is
Speaker 1: also this fact. It is more evident now than it
Speaker 1: has been at any point in the past, that Trump's
Speaker 1: mind is gone. He is at his most vulnerable position.
Speaker 1: His mental health now down to about a zero on
Speaker 1: a scale of zero to anything. Is so bad even
Speaker 1: the Washington effing Post has noticed. It is so bad.
Speaker 1: The Washington Post even put it on its front page.
Speaker 1: He's hyping weight loss drugs in the Oval office and
Speaker 1: how he and he alone can bring down their price.
Speaker 1: And a weight loss patient there to extol weight loss
Speaker 1: drugs and say how safe they are and to praise
Speaker 1: Trump's wonderfulness. Collapses, folds, drops slow motion like a deflating
Speaker 1: inflatable tube. Man that he used car sales lot. Weight
Speaker 1: loss patient fates at weight loss meeting It's like the
Speaker 1: bit in the Jack Nicholson pictured Chinatown, where the corner
Speaker 1: says to Nicholson.
Speaker 2: Mettle of a drought. The water commissioner drowns only an la. Trump,
Speaker 2: whose mind is gone, gets up, looks at the guy
Speaker 2: on the floor, looks away, stares forward, totally pissed off.
Speaker 2: How dare he interrupt my latest attempt to rip off America?
Speaker 2: Photos taken while they carry the poor deflated tube man
Speaker 2: out of the Oval meeting resumes. Trump sits down. He does, not, however,
Speaker 2: fully fall asleep this time, Trump, whose mind is Gone,
Speaker 2: had already fallen a sleep quote. A closer look at
Speaker 2: Trump's apparent struggles to fight off sleep in the Oval
Speaker 2: office read the Washington Post headline. A Washington Post analysis
Speaker 2: of multiple video feeds found that the president spent nearly
Speaker 2: twenty minutes apparently battling to keep his eyes open. Eight
Speaker 2: hundred and fifteen words followed that headline and four pictures,
Speaker 2: one of Trump whose mind is gone with one eye closed,
Speaker 2: one with one eye closed and two fingers rubbing that eye,
Speaker 2: one with both eyes closed, and one where you can
Speaker 2: almost see the snoring quote. The president displayed a constellation
Speaker 2: of movements familiar to anyone who was attempted to stay
Speaker 2: awake during a work meeting. He closed his eyes, he
Speaker 2: put his hand to his temple, He slouched in his chair.
Speaker 2: The Washington Post The Broken Fascist, Quizzling Bezos. Washington Post
Speaker 2: even writes that after Gordon the weight loss guy exited
Speaker 2: stage left, that the Trump stroking quote resumed about an
Speaker 2: hour later, with Trump noticeably perkier, but still caught on
Speaker 2: camera at moments with his eyes closed. The article is amazing.
Speaker 2: What's also amazing is that writers Dan Diamond and Jam
Speaker 2: Readers still work for The Washington Post. It's amazing that
Speaker 2: they are still unindicted by Trump's corrupt, morally bankrupt Department
Speaker 2: of Justice. Maybe that's because Trump, whose mind is gone,
Speaker 2: forgot to tell his Department of Justice to indict the writers.
Speaker 1: Look, don't don't. Don't get me wrong, Nodding off in
Speaker 1: a meeting is hardly conclusive, self contained proof that your
Speaker 1: mind is gone. There is a reasonable chance that you
Speaker 1: will nod off during this podcast, and you're fine. But
Speaker 1: Trump's quick trip to Sleepy Town, his quick role as
Speaker 1: the nod father, was just the symbolic part of all this.
Speaker 1: Because Trump's mind is gone, and sudden sleep, bordering on
Speaker 1: a kind of colloquial narcolepsy is often a component to
Speaker 1: dementia of all kinds, just as is a cognitive test
Speaker 1: in April and then the same test exactly six months later,
Speaker 1: accompanied by an MRI. Just as is increasingly erratic behavior
Speaker 1: over a short period of time. And I know it's
Speaker 1: amazing to look at crazy Trump and use the phrase
Speaker 1: increasingly erratic. He's been increasingly erratic since December nineteen eighty three.
Speaker 1: I can only speak to December nineteen eighty three, to
Speaker 1: that date, nearly forty two years ago, because that's when
Speaker 1: I first met him. It probably started long before then.
Speaker 1: But he is his his mind is gone, and it's
Speaker 1: accelerating again. Even if the snooze was just a snooze
Speaker 1: and the non human response to the guy there to
Speaker 1: tell you how safe the drugs are passing out in
Speaker 1: front of the media, even if the response to that
Speaker 1: is just part of Trump's evil. Let's step back from
Speaker 1: the nuts and bolts of say the government shut down,
Speaker 1: to try to process how it was perceived by Trump,
Speaker 1: whose mind is gone. He thought it would be a
Speaker 1: good look to cut off food stamps, so lines at
Speaker 1: soup kitchens outdoors would get longer just as it was
Speaker 1: getting cold. He thought the correct political move as the
Speaker 1: holidays approached was government sponsored starvation. He believed that the
Speaker 1: country would praise him for gradually also shutting down all
Speaker 1: air travel, including all air travel for his supporters, first
Speaker 1: for Thanksgiving and then for Christmas and New Year's. Marjorie
Speaker 1: Taylor Green got on a train for Georgia. She was
Speaker 1: having such trouble getting on a plane over the weekend.
Speaker 1: Marjorie Taylor Green advised people to take the train. Trump
Speaker 1: thought these were good political moves. He thought he could
Speaker 1: even get America to blame the Democrats for this, even
Speaker 1: though he runs the White House, he runs the Senate,
Speaker 1: he runs the House, and he runs the Supreme Court.
Speaker 1: And of course, since he only watches television that feeds
Speaker 1: back his propaganda to him, he thinks he's right because
Speaker 1: his mind is gone again. I am reminded of a
Speaker 1: movie scene Anthony Perkins as the troubled baseball player Jim
Speaker 1: pearsall in fear strikes out. They wanted him to change
Speaker 1: from the outfield to shortstop, and he didn't want to
Speaker 1: play shortstop, and basically he had a breakdown over it.
Speaker 1: One day Piersaul Perkins as Pearsall is suddenly chipper and happy,
Speaker 1: and his wife says, Jim, what happened, and he merrily
Speaker 1: explains that he doesn't have to play shortstop anymore because
Speaker 1: he's hidden his shortstops glove, and she looks at him
Speaker 1: like she is saying to him herself. He doesn't realize
Speaker 1: there's more than one shortstops glove in the world, does he.
Speaker 1: His mind is gone Trump is Jim Pearsall. When it
Speaker 1: comes to the media, he doesn't see it. That means
Speaker 1: nobody said it, kind of a Mike Johnson way of
Speaker 1: looking at life.
Speaker 2: His mind is gone.
Speaker 1: Every week now he says something about lowering food prices
Speaker 1: by seven hundred percent or lowering energy prices by a
Speaker 1: billion percent, and nobody says, you know, uh, sir, you
Speaker 1: can raise stuff by more than one hundred percent, but
Speaker 1: you can't lower anything by more than one hundred percent.
Speaker 1: It's not mathematically possible. So he keeps saying it because
Speaker 1: his mind is gone. Every week he lets his crazy
Speaker 1: Renfield Steven Miller spend yet crazier and more dangerous conspiracy theories.
Speaker 1: The newest one yesterday was about Obama and Comer and Clapper.
Speaker 1: I think he's got Jimmy Hoffe in this one, and
Speaker 1: maybe the people who killed Julius Caesar and Doge payments
Speaker 1: or something. Because Trump's mind is gone and Miller's mind
Speaker 1: has been gone for decades now, Trump has decided to
Speaker 1: defend his disastrous tariffs by promising a two thousand dollars
Speaker 1: dividend to everyone in the country except the rich. And
Speaker 1: that's something around six hundred billion dollars right now during
Speaker 1: a shutdown. So the Treasury Secretary, you, who literally cannot
Speaker 1: keep his head straight up on his shoulders, races to
Speaker 1: the Nearest Sunday Show to explain that the two thousand
Speaker 1: dollars dividend might just be the money we met along
Speaker 1: the way. Quote tax decreases, no tax on tips, no
Speaker 1: tax on overtime, no tax on Social Security, deductibility of
Speaker 1: older loans, says Scott Bessen unquote, here's your two thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Oh wait, no, there is no two thousand dollars. You
Speaker 1: already got your two thousand dollars. So Trump, whose mind
Speaker 1: is gone, also suggested that's how to change the Affordable
Speaker 1: Care Act simply send people money for healthcare from the government.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure what planned Trump has because his mind
Speaker 1: is gone, but it sounds like you just write Trump
Speaker 1: a letter and tell him how much you need. Now,
Speaker 1: be honest, don't pad it. Let's all play fair and
Speaker 1: this will work out fine. How much do you need
Speaker 1: for healthcare? Right Donald Trump, Washington, DC, and he'll send
Speaker 1: it to you. I don't know how to put this exactly.
Speaker 1: Trump's mind is gone, and he spent yesterday gushing about
Speaker 1: a flyover when two thousand flights for you the little
Speaker 1: people were canceled, and gushing about gold drapes at his
Speaker 1: new ballroom at the White House, gold drapes at the
Speaker 1: executives at the Rotary Club of Skinny Atlas, New York
Speaker 1: would look at and say, are you crazy? We have
Speaker 1: class here. But again, it may be easiest to understand
Speaker 1: all this if we underscore the more symbolic stuff, like
Speaker 1: his Thursday nap before and after Gordon the Ozembic victim fainted,
Speaker 1: the nerve of him to upstage El Presidente like that,
Speaker 1: or like what happened yesterday went at the Washington Commander's
Speaker 1: NFL game, the team owner Josh I'm not Daniel Snyder.
Speaker 1: Harris reportedly did discuss naming his new stadium after Trump
Speaker 1: and discussed it with Trump. Most impressively, Harris supposedly kept
Speaker 1: a straight face as he did this ESPN. It was
Speaker 1: a first reported Trump was making the hint demand threat
Speaker 1: full expression of his narcissism. He wanted the stadium named
Speaker 1: after him because his mind is gone. His version of
Speaker 1: the North Korean news anchor that would be Caroli and
Speaker 1: Levitt immediately announced this would be wonderful because Trump enabled
Speaker 1: the building of the stadium, which is absolute nonsense. It
Speaker 1: all happened during the Biden administration. On the other hand,
Speaker 1: the possibilities for new names for this stadium have inspired
Speaker 1: some of the most searing anti Trump commentary of our times.
Speaker 1: Several wags noted that for years in Miami we already
Speaker 1: had the Orange Bowl. There were many variations of Trump
Speaker 1: is in the Epstein Files Stadium, but the winner came
Speaker 1: from an actual football guy, former Ravens and Eagles Super
Speaker 1: Bowl winning receiver Tory Smith, who wrote, simply impeached field
Speaker 1: at Insurrection Stadium, whereas I added, it could be colloquially
Speaker 1: known as the Big House, the Big House for those
Speaker 1: of you untainted by college football. That's what they call
Speaker 1: the football stadium at the University of Michigan. There is
Speaker 1: actually in this episode more actual sports to mention. Give
Speaker 1: me a moment, though, first, let me circle back to
Speaker 1: the disaster in the Senate last night and the need
Speaker 1: to excommunicate the Quizzlings led by Dick Durbin and our
Speaker 1: visiting senator from Cannimatet Territory, John Vetterman. They are cowards,
Speaker 1: they are failures. They have snatched defeat from the jaws
Speaker 1: of victory. Moreover, it is the exact opposite of what
Speaker 1: the last two weeks has shown us. Stand up to Trump.
Speaker 1: He is still terrified of anybody who fights back. Run
Speaker 1: against Trump on what he is doing to the economic
Speaker 1: lives of your constituents, and run against Trump on what
Speaker 1: he is doing to the civil rights lives of your constituents.
Speaker 1: The New York Times revealed the seven percent solution in
Speaker 1: the Jersey and Virginia governor's elections. Why were they blowouts?
Speaker 1: Quote the two Democrats won so decisively because they also
Speaker 1: flipped a crucial sliver of voters who said they supported
Speaker 1: mister Trump. In twenty twenty four, Miss Chryl and Ms.
Speaker 1: Svanberger both won seven percent of mister Trump's supporters. According
Speaker 1: to the exit polls, seven percent of Trump's supporters. Do
Speaker 1: you want to do the math on that? In a
Speaker 1: national race, what seven percent of Trump's supporters would do?
Speaker 1: That might be a shutout in the electoral college. The
Speaker 1: exit polls to resume the Times report in New Jersey
Speaker 1: found that Miss Cheryl won a whopping eighteen percent of
Speaker 1: mister Trump's Hispanic support in the state. No figures were
Speaker 1: reported for Virginia, where the Hispanic vote is smaller. Run
Speaker 1: against Trump. Do not make deals with Republicans in the Senate,
Speaker 1: and it's not just big picture like the governor's races.
Speaker 1: The magas sheriff in Bucks County in Pennsylvania is gone.
Speaker 1: Fred Harron landslided by the Democrat Danny Seisler, who ran
Speaker 1: against Harron's collaboration with Trump's ICE. From the Bucks County
Speaker 1: Courier Times quote, Seisler's victory was driven in part by
Speaker 1: backlash to Heron's decision to partner county deputies with ICE.
Speaker 1: The partnership, which a Bucks County judge upheld last month,
Speaker 1: would have allowed sheriff's deputies to act as Ice agents.
Speaker 1: Seisler pledged to end the program if elected. Seisler spoke
Speaker 1: at anti Trump protests across the county, urging voters to
Speaker 1: show their anger at the president by voting out Republicans
Speaker 1: in Bucks County. And guess what they did run against Trump?
Speaker 1: Just try to do two things at the same time.
Speaker 1: Economy and Trump is death. I mean a Trump is
Speaker 1: who just left the dictatorship is now threatening judges with
Speaker 1: a vague, violent kind of motif. This guy spoke to
Speaker 1: a Federalist Society conference of lawyers. A judge disagrees with Trump,
Speaker 1: impeach him or her. Quote, what's going to force the
Speaker 1: Supreme Court to do something is fundamentally political pressure, says
Speaker 1: this guy Myzell. It's going to be when Congress starts
Speaker 1: impeaching judges and saying you are now encroaching into our territory.
Speaker 1: Now here's the vague threat. Quoting myzel again, what do
Speaker 1: I think Trump should do? He should stand up and
Speaker 1: he's already done this and say judges, I know how
Speaker 1: to deal with stray cats. Who knows exactly what that means,
Speaker 1: But it doesn't to me sound like catch them and
Speaker 1: rehabilitate them through reward based training. Punchline, This goober Mizelle
Speaker 1: threatening to treat judges like stray cats. Cornell law naturally
Speaker 1: that Mizelle is married to a judge. I'm sorry, dear,
Speaker 1: I didn't mean you. I didn't mean you were a
Speaker 1: stray cat. Run against Trump or against Vance? Do they
Speaker 1: really think Vance is?
Speaker 2: You?
Speaker 1: Know it? Do trump ists and MAGA look at JV
Speaker 1: and see a leader, a macho figure of some kind.
Speaker 1: Do they not see an eye wearing guy who in
Speaker 1: the places where Trump uses his TMU Hitler act, Vance
Speaker 1: simply pinches Politico polling on favorites for twenty twenty eight.
Speaker 1: In the nominations, Vance is the Republican favorite. Now the
Speaker 1: reality check here is it's Republicans, so there is no reality.
Speaker 1: Vance polls thirty five percent, and second at twenty eight
Speaker 1: percent is Trump.
Speaker 3: Yes.
Speaker 1: Six out of ten of the police are also in
Speaker 1: favor of amending the constitution to allow a third term.
Speaker 1: Even though thirteen states can in effect veto any constitutional amendment,
Speaker 1: even if you could get one up and running in
Speaker 1: the next three years, and there are sixteen no question
Speaker 1: unshakable permanent blue states, that number is probably actually nineteen,
Speaker 1: and by next year it'll be in the low to
Speaker 1: mid twenties. Run against Trump advance to quote another line
Speaker 1: written by my late friend Bill Goldman that has been
Speaker 1: transformed into history, even though we don't think Deep Throat
Speaker 1: actually said it in real life, only in the movie
Speaker 1: All the President's Men. The truth is these are not
Speaker 1: very bright guys. Trump's appeal of the court order denying
Speaker 1: him the chance to starve Americans by not paying snap
Speaker 1: benefits literally concluded. Quote. This is in the document filed
Speaker 1: with the courts. Quote just think of JD.
Speaker 2: Vance.
Speaker 1: There is no lawful basis for an order that directs
Speaker 1: USDA to somehow find four billion dollars in the metaphorical
Speaker 1: couch cushions.
Speaker 3: Oh this is Sports Senate. Wait check that not anymore.
Speaker 3: This is countdown with Keith Alberman.
Speaker 1: Couch cushions.
Speaker 2: Did you say? Okay?
Speaker 1: Two things. The marriage between legalized sports gambling and the
Speaker 1: actual sports leagues is now claiming victims. Those two suspended
Speaker 1: Cleveland pitchers, Emmanuel Classe and Luis Ortiz, who didn't see
Speaker 1: the playoffs because well, there was some problem with legal gambling.
Speaker 1: They've now been charged or tees has been arrested. The
Speaker 1: allegation is they took a couple thousand each to throw
Speaker 1: specific pitches or pitches at specific speeds, so gamblers could
Speaker 1: bet on how fast the pitch was or if it
Speaker 1: was a ball or a strike. Micro betting, not on
Speaker 1: a game, not on a run, not.
Speaker 2: On a hit.
Speaker 1: Just no harm, right, just a couple of pitches. First
Speaker 1: pitch of the inning is a ball, I win? Who loses? Allegedly,
Speaker 1: the gamblers, all with legal bets, won something approaching a
Speaker 1: total of half a million dollars. Class A and Ortiz
Speaker 1: deny everything. Both are not pitching at the moment and
Speaker 1: probably won't for at least a while, and they face, oh,
Speaker 1: by the way, sixty five years in jail. Fortunately, though,
Speaker 1: we can all relax because these are the only two
Speaker 1: pitchers who ever even thought of doing anything like this. No,
Speaker 1: of course, it couldn't be wide spread. No, no, definitely,
Speaker 1: not just these two instances, just these two guys and
Speaker 1: their friends ever, anybody else, nobody else ever ever at
Speaker 1: all couch cushions. And on a lighter note, if you
Speaker 1: saw it online, no, the supposed one of one super
Speaker 1: rare baseball card of show hey Otani is a fake.
Speaker 1: It is clearly a photoshopped version of a tops now card,
Speaker 1: a kind of baseball card that has the picture of
Speaker 1: a player along with a game used artifact, like part
Speaker 1: of a baseball that's been cut up, or a bat
Speaker 1: or a bass or in this case, part of show
Speaker 1: Hey o'tonani is jockstrap.
Speaker 2: That's the claim. That's the claim.
Speaker 1: It's a baseball card with show Hey Otani's jockstrap one
Speaker 1: of one. It's not true. Nobody has made a game
Speaker 1: used jockstrap card. Yet on the other hand, when I
Speaker 1: first broke into television, it was common belief, I would
Speaker 1: say knowledge maybe at CNN Sports, that one of our
Speaker 1: reporters had seriously gotten a bizarre game used item and
Speaker 1: had it bronzed and mounted on a plaque, and he
Speaker 1: presented it to our network founder and owner, Ted Turner,
Speaker 1: because this reporter thought it would be a great gift
Speaker 1: that Ted would love and it would curry favor with Ted.
Speaker 1: And instead Ted was in one of his clearer moments
Speaker 1: of the early eighties and he said, get that the
Speaker 1: f out of my face, and he never quite trusted
Speaker 1: this reporter ever. Again, out of respect for the reporter,
Speaker 1: who is no longer with us. I will leave his
Speaker 1: name out of this. I did ask him about it
Speaker 1: once and he didn't deny it, and I don't think
Speaker 1: he liked me anymore after I asked him about it.
Speaker 1: I asked Ted Turner about it years ago. Ted and
Speaker 1: I got along fine for many many years. And Ted
Speaker 1: laughed and he nodded yes. All he said was that guy,
Speaker 1: what a jackass. The game used bronze item intended for
Speaker 1: Ted Turner as a gift from a CNN Sports reporter
Speaker 1: reportedly went instead onto the wall of the reporter's home.
Speaker 1: I don't know what happened to it thereafter, and in fact,
Speaker 1: I'm glad I don't know.
Speaker 2: It was.
Speaker 1: Kansas City Royal star George Bretts Jockstrap.
Speaker 2: Collect the entire series. What is this over here? This
Speaker 2: is the smallest basketball hoop I've ever oh.
Speaker 1: Also of interest here back to that fateful Oval Office
Speaker 1: dog and pony show so boring that the star civilian
Speaker 1: witness passed out, and Trump, whose mind is gone checked out. Incredibly,
Speaker 1: neither of these things constituted the dumbest thing said that
Speaker 1: fateful afternoon. That was something said by mister crue de
Speaker 1: Tay himself good old doctor Oz once again, trumpsts mister
Speaker 1: math book is our friend. Wait till you hear this.
Speaker 1: That's next. This is Countdown.
Speaker 3: This is Countdown with Keith Oberman.
Speaker 2: Still ahead.
Speaker 1: On this episode of Countdown, I'm reminded that Randolph Churchill,
Speaker 1: Winston Churchill's son once proudly wrote an article called why
Speaker 1: I'm Not a Socialist. I am going to offer you
Speaker 1: the equivalent of that in podcast form, Why I'm Not
Speaker 1: a Hockey Announcer. I know you think of this often
Speaker 1: and wonder what the truth is. The truth is I
Speaker 1: was trying to be one and then they pulled the
Speaker 1: rugout from under me. So I pulled the rugout from
Speaker 1: under them. The story of the Ithacus Stars and Why
Speaker 1: I'm Not a Hockey announcer coming up next in Things
Speaker 1: I Promised Not to Tell First, Believe it or not,
Speaker 1: there's still more new idiots to talk about. The roundup
Speaker 1: of the mis grants, morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens
Speaker 1: who constitute today's other.
Speaker 2: Worst persons in the world.
Speaker 1: Sharing the bronze in the media division Politico and The
Speaker 1: New York Times. We do the Times first, per the
Speaker 1: Sill newsletter from Lachland Cartwright breaker. He found this in
Speaker 1: the New York Times quarterly profit statement, in which on
Speaker 1: their earnings call last week, they announced they had four
Speaker 1: hundred and sixty thousand new digital subscribers. As he pointed out,
Speaker 1: it was the biggest quarterly gain since The Times started
Speaker 1: disclosing that metric a few years ago. And it's a
Speaker 1: very large number, he writes, when you consider the Times
Speaker 1: that only averaged two hundred and forty eight thousand new
Speaker 1: subscribers per quarter going all the way back to the
Speaker 1: start of twenty twenty two. How did it manage, he asks,
Speaker 1: to increase subscribers by more than forty six percent in
Speaker 1: just one earnings period. Well, Sir Lachland Cartwright found on
Speaker 1: page twelve of the third quarter results press release, that's right,
Speaker 1: he reads this stuff Times.
Speaker 2: That the Times.
Speaker 1: Started marketing a family subscription plan, not a higher price,
Speaker 1: earlier in the year like the Flick's family plan. One
Speaker 1: build account includes separate identities, as he writes, for each
Speaker 1: family member. And it started to take off mostly because
Speaker 1: people like to play games. And here's what it is,
Speaker 1: even though it's one subscription. As he found in the
Speaker 1: Times quarterly statement quote, each family subscription is priced higher
Speaker 1: than a comparable individual subscription, and is counted as one
Speaker 1: build subscriber and one additional subscriber to reflect the additional
Speaker 1: entitlements in these subscriptions. The footnote in tiny print reveals
Speaker 1: the additional subscribers represented approximately two percent of total digital
Speaker 1: only subscribers at the end of third quarter twenty twenty five.
Speaker 1: As he writes Voila, the Times new double counting method
Speaker 1: magically added two hundred and thirty five thousand new subscribers,
Speaker 1: more than half of the four hundred and sixty thousand
Speaker 1: it claimed at the top of Tuesday's earning release. In
Speaker 1: other words, when they were averaging two hundred and forty
Speaker 1: eight thousand new subscribers every quarter, this new accounting method
Speaker 1: allowed them to double that figure to make it look
Speaker 1: like they had double the new subscribers than they actually do.
Speaker 1: All the books that are fit to cook. That's my quote,
Speaker 1: not cartwrights. Then there's Politico. I have often suggested that
Speaker 1: most of Washington media is like this. It's not just
Speaker 1: that they look in the wrong end of the telescope.
Speaker 1: Twenty four hours a day, seven days a week, fifty
Speaker 1: two weeks a year, fifty three weeks a year if
Speaker 1: they could arrange it. It's not just that, but they
Speaker 1: insist they're doing it correctly, and they have welded these
Speaker 1: telescopes to the eyeballs of everybody who works in the
Speaker 1: Washington Press Corps. But it's politically true universally, but particularly
Speaker 1: true at Politico. There are lots of things that you
Speaker 1: can point to about the election of Zoron Mam Danny
Speaker 1: as mayor of New York. There are many things, whether
Speaker 1: you're opposed to it or you believe it's the greatest
Speaker 1: thing since slice bread. I happen to point at one thing,
Speaker 1: which is I think the guy is going to show
Speaker 1: up to work, unlike the last four mayors, maybe five.
Speaker 1: I like the idea that he's not seventy five years old.
Speaker 1: I like the idea that he's a wonk and a
Speaker 1: nerd and he wants to do the job. I just
Speaker 1: want somebody to do the job, just the job. I
Speaker 1: don't know how many of these things he's going to
Speaker 1: get done that he's promised. Good luck to him. Many
Speaker 1: of them make sense. The worst of them are like, Okay,
Speaker 1: that probably won't happen, but go ahead, try try The
Speaker 1: last guy all he tried to do is get free
Speaker 1: upgrades on trips to Turkey. The cheapest crook in America.
Speaker 1: You can buy the mayor of New York for five
Speaker 1: hundred dollars if you pay cash three percent off. But
Speaker 1: my point is not about It's not about any mayor
Speaker 1: past or present or future. It's about how Politico the
Speaker 1: lens through which they see the Mamdani election. This was
Speaker 1: after Mamdanni's election. They wrote this start your day with
Speaker 1: the man of the moment, New York City Mayor Alexora
Speaker 1: and Mamdani, who spoke with Politico's Joe Anuda for four
Speaker 1: and a half questions to unpack Tuesday's results. It's the
Speaker 1: final question half question that's the most revealing in democratic
Speaker 1: circles at least. So this is what about socialism, about
Speaker 1: the future of the party, about the about the nature
Speaker 1: of getting elected mayor of New York, How to be
Speaker 1: a thirty mid thirties mayor, how to look towards managing
Speaker 1: a city with almost as many people in it as
Speaker 1: Abigail Spanberger just found out as the whole state to Virginia. No, no,
Speaker 1: this is what they think. What Politico thinks is the
Speaker 1: story of the election of this man as mayor of
Speaker 1: New York. Lightning round our man, Joe says, with what
Speaker 1: can only be a gleam in his eye? First off,
Speaker 1: he should have been fired at that spot right there,
Speaker 1: Lightning round. This is one of the great cliches of journalism,
Speaker 1: people asking lightning round questions. It's relatively new, Probably nineteen seventy.
Speaker 2: Was the first time I heard it used in a
Speaker 2: political context.
Speaker 1: It's from my experience from a game show called Password
Speaker 1: with Alan Ludden, Betty White's late husband. Lightning round, our
Speaker 1: man Joe says, with what can only be a gleam
Speaker 1: in his eye? That actually, that might be an infection.
Speaker 1: Here's what they think is the most important question to
Speaker 1: ask zaraon mom Donni. He takes into that period of
Speaker 1: time of transition between his election and becoming mayor.
Speaker 2: Of New York.
Speaker 1: Quote, should Chuck Schumer face a challenge in twenty twenty eight? Seriously,
Speaker 1: that's what you ask him. If that's your fifth most
Speaker 1: important question, you should be fired. If you think it's
Speaker 1: your first most important question, you should be fired and
Speaker 1: leave the industry. And I don't I mean media, not
Speaker 1: just news media, ma'am. Donnie finally answers for himself. I'm
Speaker 1: focused on this transition, my brother. But thank you, and
Speaker 1: then and then here's the insight. This is what makes
Speaker 1: Politico Politico, sometimes writes the editor, silence is the loudest
Speaker 1: noise of all. Oh my god, you got abused and
Speaker 1: hosed for asking a stupid quot question. And you think
Speaker 1: the fact that the guy wouldn't answer it is some
Speaker 1: sort of great revelation. And I mean, we're not even
Speaker 1: talking about the merits of whether or not Chuck Schumer
Speaker 1: should face a challenge in twenty twenty eight. You know
Speaker 1: how I feel about Chuck Schumer. Why the hell you're asking, ma'am, Donnie.
Speaker 1: That man just a historic election to become mayor of
Speaker 1: New York, which hasn't had a mayor at some point
Speaker 1: in the Bloomberg administration when he violated the city charter
Speaker 1: and the votes by the city twice by the residents
Speaker 1: who said you can't have a third term, and he
Speaker 1: had a third term. Anyway, we haven't had a mayor
Speaker 1: in like twenty years.
Speaker 2: Here, you think.
Speaker 4: Chuck Shermer should face a challenge in twenty twenty eight,
Speaker 4: I mean, I would be if the child journalists who
Speaker 4: always appears in these things and does interviews at age
Speaker 4: nine of hockey players and political candidates and newly elected
Speaker 4: mayors of New York asked do you.
Speaker 1: Think Chuck Schumer should face a challenge in twenty twenty eighth?
Speaker 1: The kid should have been fired?
Speaker 2: All right, I'll stop now.
Speaker 1: Runner up worser Gianni Infantino, the head of World football,
Speaker 1: or as we in the real sports country call it soccer.
Speaker 1: Johnny Infantino was the replacement for I'm forgetting if it
Speaker 1: was directly. He succeeded the guy who went to prison,
Speaker 1: who had like sixteen apartments in New York City and
Speaker 1: used to sleep in a different one every night because
Speaker 1: he was convinced people were trying to kill him. Johnny
Speaker 1: Infantino was considered the clean guy, the reform candidate. You've
Speaker 1: seen him. Trump thinks his name is Johnny. That's Johnny.
Speaker 1: H I'm that's sick. This is the NPR account of
Speaker 1: what he's done. Now see if you can see where
Speaker 1: this is going. In fact, raise your hand when you
Speaker 1: know where this story is going. FIFA has announced the
Speaker 1: creation of a Peace Prize, which it plans to award
Speaker 1: at the draw for the World Cup on December five
Speaker 1: in Washington, the draw being who plays who The award
Speaker 1: called the FIFA Peace Prize. Ah, that's going on on
Speaker 1: a limb there. We'll quote recognize exceptional actions for peace,
Speaker 1: soccer's governing body said Wednesday, because when I think peace,
Speaker 1: I think the World Cup. When I think peace, I
Speaker 1: think guys who when they break into a brawl on
Speaker 1: the soccer pitch fight with their feet. I think FIFA
Speaker 1: for international peace Prizes. Now, admittedly the Nobel Peace Prize
Speaker 1: was started by the guy who perfected dynamite. In an
Speaker 1: increasingly unsettled and divided world, it's fundamental to recognize the
Speaker 1: outstanding contribution of those who work hard to end conflicts
Speaker 1: and bring people together in a spirit of peace, FIFA
Speaker 1: president Jiohnny Infantino said. FIFA said, the award, which Infentino
Speaker 1: will present this year. Can you now guess who it's
Speaker 1: going to, will be bestowed annually on behalf of fans
Speaker 1: from all around the world. That's right, He's going to
Speaker 1: give it to Trump, isn't he? He has been polishing
Speaker 1: Donald Trump for years now. The World Cup is in America.
Speaker 1: I don't know if anybody's heard about that. I don't
Speaker 1: know if anybody's going to hear about it when it happens,
Speaker 1: but they're going to give Donald Trump the FIFA Peace Prize,
Speaker 1: and he is so sick in the head that he's
Speaker 1: going to think it's a big deal, and he will
Speaker 1: then claim and I think this is the evil genius
Speaker 1: in the Infantino decision here. I think he will then
Speaker 1: claim Trump that is that he has won this award
Speaker 1: every time it's ever been given out. But it's not
Speaker 1: al timate, but our winner. One of his employees, doctor Oz.
Speaker 1: You may remember Doctor Oz from such farces as his
Speaker 1: run for the Senate in Pennsylvania and the tone deaf
Speaker 1: video he made that he shot of himself in a supermarket,
Speaker 1: actually had a crew shooting him in a supermarket, complaining
Speaker 1: about the price of vegetables to put in crude detays.
Speaker 1: His wife wanted to make cru detays like everybody. Everybody
Speaker 1: on earth knew what a crup detay was, and everybody
Speaker 1: on earth went shopping for the components of a crue
Speaker 1: de tay every day, so that when he said she
Speaker 1: wanted to make a crue de tay, well, you'll hear
Speaker 1: the clip in a moment, but he's topped himself. He
Speaker 1: is now head of the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid,
Speaker 1: but he is still a moron the Crewe detay first
Speaker 1: and what turns out to be his crude understanding of
Speaker 1: mathematic X.
Speaker 2: Second, there's some grocery shopping.
Speaker 5: I'm at weg nurse and my wife wants some vegetables
Speaker 5: for crude to day. Right, So here's a broccoli that's
Speaker 5: two bucks. We thought it was one hundred and twenty
Speaker 5: five billion pounds. As president, our estimate based on the
Speaker 5: company numbers as well, is Americans will lose one hundred
Speaker 5: and thirty five billion pounds by the midterms.
Speaker 1: You heard him first, he said it right. They thought
Speaker 1: that with ozempic and the other drugs that were getting
Speaker 1: people hooked on rather than teaching them how to eat
Speaker 1: correctly or even close to correctly. I speak as somebody
Speaker 1: who's fought this battle my whole life. I understand it.
Speaker 1: But it's guess what happens in twenty years when they
Speaker 1: find out what the long term side effects are and
Speaker 1: the drugs. We thought it was one hundred and twenty
Speaker 1: five million pounds that would be lost, and then of
Speaker 1: course he wanted to impress Trump, and in his haste
Speaker 1: to do that, he insisted, as you just heard, Americans
Speaker 1: will lose one hundred and thirty five bill billion pounds
Speaker 1: by the midterms billion. Now, depending on your account of
Speaker 1: our population, three hundred and thirty plus or minus million,
Speaker 1: that would be each person loses somewhere between three hundred
Speaker 1: and ninety nine pounds and four hundred and three pounds.
Speaker 1: So you've got till midterms to drop one fifth of
Speaker 1: a ton each of you, including the new born. How
Speaker 1: big is your baby? Well minus three hundred and ninety five.
Speaker 1: This is the same math that allows Trump to claim
Speaker 1: he lowered prices by eleventy billion percent. Only Memet, Oz
Speaker 1: is not supposed to be this much of a moron,
Speaker 1: and yet he is because you can take the cruditae
Speaker 1: out of Oz, but you can't take the oz out
Speaker 1: of the one hundred and thirty five billion pounds. Nice work, fella,
Speaker 1: doctor Memetz. So who could lose four hundred and three
Speaker 1: pounds do you think I mean? Besides, it's Trump Oz
Speaker 1: two days hotter, worst person. And I mentioned recently that
Speaker 1: one of the things I wanted to do, In fact,
Speaker 1: my original career goal in broadcasting was to become play
Speaker 1: by play announcer of the New York Yankees. The second one,
Speaker 1: and the one I actually tried to work on for
Speaker 1: a while, was to become play by play announcer of
Speaker 1: the New York Rangers hockey team. My high school, Hackley,
Speaker 1: had a hockey team and a radio station, not that
Speaker 1: anybody listened to us, and we had a sports director.
Speaker 1: His name was Chris Berman, and he did the basketball games,
Speaker 1: and one day put out an ad for somebody to
Speaker 1: do the hockey games. And the requirement was do you
Speaker 1: own your own cassette tape recorder? And I've played you
Speaker 1: the tapes of what I sounded like long before my
Speaker 1: voice even began to change. The play by play wasn't
Speaker 1: bad for a thirteen year old kid, And I have
Speaker 1: to say the next year, nineteen seventy three, when the
Speaker 1: Pittsburgh Penguins job opened for play by play radio guy,
Speaker 1: I had the nuts to actually send them a tape
Speaker 1: and say, look, I know my voice is a little high,
Speaker 1: but think of the novelty aspect. So I always wanted
Speaker 1: to do hockey play by play. And then I went
Speaker 1: to Cornell, which might as well have had a professional
Speaker 1: hockey franchise, and that's still true. Lina Rink is one
Speaker 1: of the great sporting event locales in the world, certainly
Speaker 1: in college hockey, and it always sold out, and the
Speaker 1: team was competitive and number one in the IVY League
Speaker 1: and the national Championship contender. And the rights to the
Speaker 1: games were owned by Cornell and immediately, of course dispersed
Speaker 1: to the two radio stations Cornell University, Inc. Own so
Speaker 1: we never got close to doing play by play of
Speaker 1: Cornell hockey. I once asked my friend who was the
Speaker 1: general manager of those stations, Don Martin, who I've talked
Speaker 1: about here before as one of the most important people
Speaker 1: I ever met in broadcasting. I asked him, could we
Speaker 1: do the JV Games? Could we do the women's games? No,
Speaker 1: because you'll get advertising for it. I know you'll do
Speaker 1: a good job. You'll be taking bread out of the
Speaker 1: food of my announcers. And I was like, yeah, but
Speaker 1: I'm asking for like one slice of bread. You're gonna
Speaker 1: go far, but not in Ithaca. So anyway, one day
Speaker 1: a fellow named Al Goldstein, who had come to us
Speaker 1: I believe from Berkeley, California, and was twenty eight years
Speaker 1: old and long past college days or college radio days.
Speaker 1: Moved to Ithaca, New York to try to become a
Speaker 1: radio sportscaster, newscaster, radio salesman, and had heard had done
Speaker 1: research on this and had determined that WVBR, the student
Speaker 1: owned professional radio station at Cornell University, was the best
Speaker 1: training ground for radio in the country. Al was known
Speaker 1: as weird as and long before Yankovic, and he was
Speaker 1: a delightful guy. And he used all the southern or
Speaker 1: northern California lingo that none of us understood, happening in
Speaker 1: Gnarley and all these other things, long before they became
Speaker 1: famous things. I was like, what did I'll just say
Speaker 1: I'm not sure, but whatever. He works hard. So he
Speaker 1: did sports cast, and he did newscast, and he became
Speaker 1: a salesman because we sold advertising on the radio station.
Speaker 1: And one day he came to me he said, you know, Ko,
Speaker 1: I've been talking to uh a lot of my clients
Speaker 1: out there, and they I just mentioned the Ethnica stars
Speaker 1: and their eyes light up, like why aren't they on
Speaker 1: the radio. I mean, like, I know it's not Cornell hockey, man,
Speaker 1: but they Cornell Hockey gets four thousand people if the
Speaker 1: Stars get eighteen hundred year. There's a lot of people
Speaker 1: people want to hear, why don't we do the games?
Speaker 1: I'd get it sponsored immediately, and I went say that
Speaker 1: part again, and he went through it again, and I said,
Speaker 1: why don't we? So we all knew the president of
Speaker 1: the Ithaca Stars. It was, I believe, a car salesman.
Speaker 1: His name was Bob Toddy. We called him up and
Speaker 1: said how much for the rights to broadcast your games?
Speaker 1: Would do it on an experimental basis, and he went
Speaker 1: first ones free, and I said, I think my colleagues
Speaker 1: here will agree to that, and sure enough we scheduled
Speaker 1: a broadcast of the Ithaca Stars versus somebody. The Ethica
Speaker 1: Stars would be made up of Cornell graduates who did
Speaker 1: not make it in professional hockey, or had played professional
Speaker 1: hockey and lived in the area came back to Ithaca.
Speaker 1: In other words, if you were a Cornell hockey star
Speaker 1: in nineteen seventy two and did not make a career
Speaker 1: of it, you could become an Ehaicca Stars star in
Speaker 1: nineteen seventy eight, which is when we are in the
Speaker 1: history of semi pro hockey in this country.
Speaker 2: And they did.
Speaker 1: They drew two thousand and a game at line of rink.
Speaker 1: They almost often when it would be a team like
Speaker 1: the Montreal former Canadians, they would fill the place out.
Speaker 1: People like their hockey and Ethica New York. The ice
Speaker 1: is already the the rank is fantastic. So we put
Speaker 1: Al out on this and I was like, we'll try it,
Speaker 1: and I'll do the games, and the program director, Glen Cornelius,
Speaker 1: he'll be the he'll be my color man, and we'll
Speaker 1: have somebody host in between periods, and we'll have a
Speaker 1: reporter and we'll you know, maybe we'll get some wireless.
Speaker 1: But Al came back in twenty four hours and said
Speaker 1: sold it out. I was like, but I figured out
Speaker 1: how many availabilities we'd have and how many spots, and
Speaker 1: we were going to have a waiting list. We've already
Speaker 1: taken in like twenty thousand dollars for this. I went,
Speaker 1: are you out of your mind? He goes, no, man,
Speaker 1: let's go ahead. Don't tell Toddy this will be demanding money.
Speaker 1: But I bet if we do, you know, we could
Speaker 1: do ten games before the end of their season. I
Speaker 1: was like, let's go. So we now begin to promote
Speaker 1: this thing on WVBR coming up on Saturday night, and
Speaker 1: Glenn Cornelius and I go to a Corneill hockey practice
Speaker 1: and we do a practice broadcast of a game, and
Speaker 1: We're like, this isn't bad, and I'm thinking, maybe I
Speaker 1: could still become a hockey play by play man and
Speaker 1: my voice is changing, maybe I can send the tape
Speaker 1: to the Pittsburgh Penguins again. So now this is Monday
Speaker 1: or Tuesday, and then the broadcast is coming up on Saturday.
Speaker 1: And we went wall to wall every commercial break on WVBR,
Speaker 1: every newscast, every sports cast, every disc jockey show, even
Speaker 1: the public affairs broadcasts. In the breaks, it was don't
Speaker 1: forget to listen to the other guitars they're premiering on
Speaker 1: WVBR with Keith Olverman and Glenn Cornelias, and we had
Speaker 1: five announcers, and we literally rented wireless mics.
Speaker 2: And we had this whole thing.
Speaker 1: We had a scoreboard show planned and a studio. It
Speaker 1: was just it was network level excess.
Speaker 2: On Friday afternoon, I walked into the radio station and
Speaker 2: Al Goldstein was sitting at the desk in the newsroom
Speaker 2: that I usually used, in my chair in front of
Speaker 2: my typewriter Ashen and Al had what would have been
Speaker 2: politely referred to as a ruddy complexion, and he was
Speaker 2: white as a sheet. And I said, what's wrong? He goes,
Speaker 2: what's go inside? Man, Let's go inside. And we went
Speaker 2: into a studio and he went, they canceled the game.
Speaker 2: I went, what our game? Our game tomorrow night? It's canceled.
Speaker 2: I said, what do you mean? It's canceled the Apparently
Speaker 2: there's a they forgot they forgot to rent the rink.
Speaker 2: So what do you mean they forgot to rent the rink?
Speaker 2: They think the Stars have been in business for twenty years.
Speaker 2: Suddenly he forgets to rent rent the rink. Yeah, there's
Speaker 2: a JV women's hockey practice and they won't interrupt it.
Speaker 1: They won't change it.
Speaker 2: There's no game Saturday. Man. I I can't remember the
Speaker 2: rest of that day. I do know from having gone
Speaker 2: and listen to the tape that at some point I
Speaker 2: decided that there was a very simple solution to this
Speaker 2: that more than likely my old friend Don Martin from
Speaker 2: whcuat enough of Mythica, had prevailed upon Bob Toddy, the
Speaker 2: general manager of the Ethica Stars, to not have any
Speaker 2: game that would be broadcast on WVBR and the mention,
Speaker 2: by the way, when we called Bob Toddy and did
Speaker 2: the nineteen seventy eight equivalent of WTF on his backside,
Speaker 2: he said, I'm I've also rethought the whole idea. We're
Speaker 2: not going to do any more games on radio. So
Speaker 2: we haven't done any goddamn games on radio because you
Speaker 2: just forgot to rent the rink. What kind of business
Speaker 2: are you in? Do you sell cars that don't have wheels?
Speaker 2: I hung up on them.
Speaker 1: I was just the same then when I was twenty
Speaker 1: years old. In fact, I was still nineteen. I'm very
Speaker 1: proud of that. In any event, we solved this one
Speaker 1: pretty clearly. I went on the air that night and
Speaker 1: I said, we have breaking news from the world of
Speaker 1: semi pro hockey. It's sad news, particularly in light of
Speaker 1: the fact that we were intending to bring you the
Speaker 1: Ithaca Stars game tomorrow night here on WVBRS. You may
Speaker 1: have heard in the three thousand advertisements we do for today,
Speaker 1: we have bad news. The Ithaca Stars have gone bankrupt.
Speaker 1: Don't mess with the nineteen year old olderman. Thank you
Speaker 1: very much. I've done all the damage I can do here,
Speaker 1: thank you for listening. Yes, yes, I lied to the audience.
Speaker 1: Yes I suspect I was lied to by at least
Speaker 1: two major organizations in the city of Ethica, New York.
Speaker 1: I felt it was justified I might do the same
Speaker 1: thing now.
Speaker 2: So there.
Speaker 1: Most of our countdown music was arranged, produced, and performed
Speaker 1: by Brian Ray and John Phillip Schanel, the musical directors
Speaker 1: of Countdown, and it was produced by TKO Brothers. Mister
Speaker 1: Ray was on guitars, bass and drums, and mister Schanale
Speaker 1: was kind enough to handle orchestration and keyboards. Our pithy
Speaker 1: and satirical musical comments are by the best baseball stadium
Speaker 1: organist ever, Nancy Faust. The sports music is the Olderman
Speaker 1: theme from ESPN two, written by Mitch Warren Davis courtesy
Speaker 1: of ESPN Inc. Some other music arranged and performed by
Speaker 1: the group No Horns Allowed. And my announcer today was
Speaker 1: my friend Stevie van Zant. Everything else was as always
Speaker 1: my fault. That's countdown for today. Day two hundred and
Speaker 1: ninety four of America held hostage again, just sixty nine
Speaker 1: days until the scheduled end of his lame duck and
Speaker 1: lame brained term unless he is removed sooner by Maga
Speaker 1: and Epstein or whatever that is on his hand, or
Speaker 1: a bad escalator or tail and all, or his jet
Speaker 1: made out of poop, or or the next Alzheimer's test.
Speaker 1: The next scheduled countdown is Thursday. Until then, I'm Keith Oulderman.
Speaker 1: Good morning, good afternoon, goodnight, and good luck. Countdown with
Speaker 1: Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts
Speaker 1: from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
Speaker 1: you get your podcasts.