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Speaker 1: Well, I invited you, hear thought. I made myself perfectly clear.

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Speaker 1: But you're, I guess to my home. You gotta come

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Speaker 1: to be.

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Speaker 2: Empty, and I said, no, guests. Your presence is presence,

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Speaker 2: and I already had too much stuff, So how did

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Speaker 2: you dare.

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Speaker 1: To surbey me?

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Speaker 3: Here we are it's I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger.

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Speaker 3: I'm about five days out from a haircut. I just

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Speaker 3: need everyone to bear with me, and and the person

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Speaker 3: that is currently dealing with it the most is my

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Speaker 3: wonderful guest, just a wonderful, wonderful energy and such a

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Speaker 3: funny person. Caroline Goldfarb, Caroline, welcome to I said no gifts.

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Speaker 3: I'm so excited. I'm compelling. I'm completely compelling. How are you?

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Speaker 3: I'm good, I'm great, Bridgie, your hair looks fantastic. I

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Speaker 3: don't strongly disagree, strongly disagree. We're two months from my

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Speaker 3: last haircut at this point, and this is how good

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Speaker 3: it looks. Fridgie, you look like a superhero. Thank you.

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Speaker 3: The swirl I've got constantly have the swirl. My hair

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Speaker 3: is just kind of out of control and I let

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Speaker 3: it do its own thing. The wind has been kind

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Speaker 3: of blasting at the last couple of days. Your hair

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Speaker 3: looks like a strawberry Foster's Freeze, and I just want

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Speaker 3: to get in there. I've never had a Foster's fur ez. Oh, Bridger,

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Speaker 3: what are you hang to me? You haven't left a

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Speaker 3: foster Spreeze? Does feel right up your alley? Of course?

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Speaker 4: Uh?

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Speaker 3: Pure garbage neon color Ye, anthropomorphic food mascot. Wait what

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Speaker 3: is their mascot? It's a little swirling man. Oh, just

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Speaker 3: like a little ice cream guy. Yeah, he's cute as hell. Fin,

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Speaker 3: he's cute. Is Foster's Freeze a restaurant or just a

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Speaker 3: nice cream place?

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Speaker 4: It's so much more than both of those things. They

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Speaker 4: have food, but it's mostly just the ice cream. And

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Speaker 4: they're specialize in a dipped cone.

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Speaker 3: Oh sure, like the hardened cone stuff whatever that material Again,

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Speaker 3: another thing that I feel like is really in your wheelhouse.

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Speaker 3: It's just a chemical Leiden. Yes, food product. Yes, Yes,

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Speaker 3: I love high and low. That's the thing. You're very

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Speaker 3: You really ride that line in an incredible way.

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Speaker 4: I write it like a goddamn mechanical bull. It's all ranch, baby,

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Speaker 4: I write it.

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Speaker 3: I love I love below.

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Speaker 4: Like Oh like I could, I could get lost in

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Speaker 4: the pop tarts aisle, of course, or like new Cereals,

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Speaker 4: Like I was at the market this this, oh the markets,

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Speaker 4: and I was perusing the cereal aisles and I saw

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Speaker 4: some Cereals.

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Speaker 3: Cereals. Really they're making strides. I think that Cereal is

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Speaker 3: in a an area right now where that most people

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Speaker 3: have realized that you probably shouldn't have that as your

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Speaker 3: main breakfast. And they're in a panic mode where they're

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Speaker 3: just saying, we're going to make everything. They're going to

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Speaker 3: try every single thing. They're the wall and see what

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Speaker 3: did you see? Okay? They have like you know, the

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Speaker 3: the powdered donuts right like a doughnut.

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Speaker 5: They have doughnuts, Cereals branded doughnuts like the gas station donut.

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Speaker 3: Yes, those turned into what no homage? It is the

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Speaker 3: donut brand. And did you get some?

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Speaker 4: No, I don't.

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Speaker 3: I don't actually eat all that shit. It's the powdered

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Speaker 3: one though. Yeah, they were power because the one I

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Speaker 3: usually have is the chocolate donut. Well, I say usually,

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Speaker 3: like I'm at the gas station getting donuts every week,

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Speaker 3: but I remember when I would get a donut. Do

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Speaker 3: you remember this chocolate one? The chocolate ones were not

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Speaker 3: my thing. It's like a weirdly I was flavorless wax.

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Speaker 4: It's kind of like the coating on taglongs. It's exactly,

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Speaker 4: this isn't chocolate. Yes, this is waxy like thank you,

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Speaker 4: closer to a candle than anything else.

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Speaker 3: You are confirming what and God bless the Girl Scouts

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Speaker 3: the tag.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, doing great things. The tag Longs are fucking disgusting.

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Speaker 5: It's such a missed opportunity on such a huge level.

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Speaker 5: I'd rather literally eat a Yankee candle with a spoon.

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Speaker 5: I would rather sit eat an.

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Speaker 4: Entire Yankee candle. I'm not a Girl Scout cookie person,

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Speaker 4: and I'm a Girl Scout, Proud Girl Scout, Daisies, Brownies

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Speaker 4: and Girl Scouts I like a samoa.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, they're all fucking tru samoas. Have the Girl

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Speaker 3: Scout cookies lowered in quality in years? Or have my

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Speaker 3: tastes gotten?

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Speaker 1: You know?

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Speaker 3: That's and again we should still be buying Girl Scout cookies.

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Speaker 3: I don't know that I've read anything too terrible about

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Speaker 3: the Girl Scouts there.

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Speaker 4: Oh, it's like they're pretty much fine, like promoting women's leadership, okay,

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Speaker 4: bean in that kind of stuff. Okay, so we have

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Speaker 4: Cheryl Sandberg now is like, we don't even need the

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Speaker 4: Girl Scouts in a world where Chrissy Teagan exists.

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Speaker 3: It's like scrolling through Chrissy Teagan's Twitter.

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Speaker 4: Feed for two minutes is more empowering than all fifteen

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Speaker 4: years I spent in Girl Scouts just saying anyway, Oh, okay,

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Speaker 4: so they had Okay, this one really got me.

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Speaker 3: Cinnamon for cinnamon, frosted flakes, Okay, I could get wait,

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Speaker 3: frosted flakes.

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Speaker 4: I don't.

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Speaker 3: I think frost flakes are disgusting. You hate frosted flakes?

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Speaker 3: Why would you get I mean, there are so many

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Speaker 3: options in cereals. I'm pulling up the video because I

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Speaker 3: need to.

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Speaker 4: I just need to make sure I don't forget any

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Speaker 4: of them. Oh god, there were so many disgusting cereals.

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Speaker 3: Oh oh what else was there? They had? Like birthday cake,

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Speaker 3: fruity pebbles, bad idea. They had something called birthday cake

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Speaker 3: anything not. Oh, it's a it's just sure like the

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Speaker 3: definition of birthday cake is just sweet. Like that's not

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Speaker 3: a flavor profile, it's just a color.

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Speaker 4: Birthday cake speaks to something like very dark. It's a

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Speaker 4: very dark side of our American society's obsession with birthdays.

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Speaker 4: This obsession, it's like me, me, me, culture narcissism.

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Speaker 3: I just don't.

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Speaker 4: I don't get down with birthday cake at all as

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Speaker 4: a genre literally whatsoever. Oh they had something called I

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Speaker 4: just want to make sure I get the name exactly right.

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Speaker 4: I believe they were called pillows. It was like this

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Speaker 4: kind of fruit loops birthday cake. Okay, Oh, cinnamon toast

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Speaker 4: crunch churros.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I could probably get behind that.

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Speaker 4: Okay, cinnamon too's crunch, like a cinnamon toast crunch, mega

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Speaker 4: stuffed oreos cereal.

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Speaker 3: Oh so it's just a more donuts watching this video

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Speaker 3: and that your camera work is very disorient making.

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Speaker 4: Best you know, they call me Caroline Spielberg. No, Caroline

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Speaker 4: mckayl let's Fielburg.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god? Just you guys know Mia Filberg is?

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Speaker 3: Oh I don't. Is she his daughter? Listeners? Who heard that?

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Speaker 3: Who know? MICHAELA reach out? Let me know who you are?

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Speaker 3: Oh god, No, I get pillows. This is a Pillsberry

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Speaker 3: brand cereal. Okay, pop tart cereal like basically makes sense

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Speaker 3: to me. Oh my god, fruit flavored kicks. That sucks,

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Speaker 3: I know, you're into pop through the pop darts eye.

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Speaker 3: But look how many there are video cupcake feature length

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Speaker 3: films of just all of the cereals you saw in

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Speaker 3: a discount grocery outlet. Oh my god, just the island

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Speaker 3: of misfit toys for cereal? Did you buy anything? I

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Speaker 3: didn't buy any cereal. No, I can't have it in

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Speaker 3: the house. Oh you'll go crazy. I can't even buy

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Speaker 3: food as a joke anymore. Oh sure you know what?

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Speaker 3: What food are you buying? Is a joke?

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Speaker 4: Well that's I would buy a crazy cereal because I

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Speaker 4: think it'd be funny to have laying around.

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Speaker 3: Right then, it's like two days later, I'm my skin.

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Speaker 4: Is gray, I mean half a box of doughnuts cereal.

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Speaker 4: My like molars are loose. Kind of No, I can't.

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Speaker 4: I can't fuck with that. The reason am I gonna am?

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Speaker 4: I gonna share my secret.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna do it. Thank you.

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Speaker 4: I was at a grocery store that I just discovered

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Speaker 4: and it's completely changed my life in which way. There

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Speaker 4: it's called grocery outlet. So there was Caroline b GC

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Speaker 4: and now I'm a GC. After grocery outlet, I'm a different.

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Speaker 3: Moment, and apparently it's a nationwide thing. People know about this.

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Speaker 3: I am now that you say that, I can picture

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Speaker 3: where it is. I've driven past it and of course

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Speaker 3: been tempted to go in. It's unassuming. I would have

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Speaker 3: never gone in.

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Speaker 4: If someone didn't tell me about it. It was a

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Speaker 4: hot tip from DJ Doug pound Jet.

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Speaker 3: Okay, and how do I it's the TJ.

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Speaker 4: Max of grocery stores, but it's with a heavy emphasis

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Speaker 4: on whole foods items.

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Speaker 3: Oh, it's all like fancy really outside of the cereal

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Speaker 3: you've just demonstrated, which is not that any.

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Speaker 4: I know well that that was shocking because I had

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Speaker 4: seen like eye after I of all this healthy food.

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Speaker 3: Right but almost expired oatly. I got like, oh I

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Speaker 3: saw this on your Instagram. I got so much almost

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Speaker 3: When you say almost expired, how many weeks have you

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Speaker 3: got to drink all of this oatly?

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Speaker 4: Like? Five?

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Speaker 3: Five, deliciously five weeks? It feels like a decent amount

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Speaker 3: of time. I'm up for the challenge.

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Speaker 4: Of course, if the Olympics are canceled, like I got

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Speaker 4: my own Olympics going on at home, bitch, I'm absolutely pounding.

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Speaker 3: Are you drinking oatly or putting it in your coffee. Coffee,

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Speaker 3: okay time? What I mean when is your coffee? Are

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Speaker 3: you making a latte at home?

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Speaker 4: I got this fancy espresso machine, and yeah, it's pretty

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Speaker 4: much changed everything for me.

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Speaker 3: I wonder how old this oatly actually is? How? I mean,

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Speaker 3: how long?

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Speaker 1: Cow?

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Speaker 3: It's Oh, it's water and last. Well, that's a good question.

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Speaker 4: When you put it like that, you know it seems

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Speaker 4: near rancid. It's definitely. I feel like oats, don't. I

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Speaker 4: feel like oats are like end time food. Oat milk

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Speaker 4: should be the preferred beverage.

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Speaker 3: What the oat industry wants you to think? I don't know,

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Speaker 3: and you've exposed them. I don't all this fancy beer

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Speaker 3: on clear. Now you've brought this beer with you. That's gorgeous.

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Speaker 3: It's a new personality, vibrant. It matches your fingernails.

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Speaker 1: Thank you.

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Speaker 4: It's called Tropical Hazy sour Ale. It's by this brand,

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Speaker 4: Anderson Valley. I love this beer brand.

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Speaker 3: It's been expired for three years. Oh god, it's so old.

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Speaker 3: My stomach hurts. Akians so good, it's just everything. I'm

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Speaker 3: a discount free. Oh you're talking. You are preaching to

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Speaker 3: the choir here. If you put outlet after a word,

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Speaker 3: I'll be in there buying whatever they've got.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, my whole childhood was just discounts, scams, bargains.

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Speaker 4: Like my earliest childhood memories of being with my mom

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Speaker 4: aren't like her reading a.

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Speaker 3: Book to me.

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Speaker 4: It would be us at a garage sale and my

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Speaker 4: mom would go, I want to buy this pan. You

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Speaker 4: go up and ask how much it is. Because you're

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Speaker 4: a little kid, he'll give you a cheaper price. So

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Speaker 4: I'd be, like four years old, like how much for

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Speaker 4: this like fucking pressure cooker?

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Speaker 3: Like for you, little girl, five dollars.

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Speaker 4: Anyway, discounts, bargains, it's it's what gets me going.

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Speaker 3: You're I mean, I know a little bit about your mom.

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Speaker 3: I think the one story I've heard is that she

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Speaker 3: picked flowers at Disneyland, yes, which I just think is incredible.

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Speaker 4: She you well, okay, I guess I'm not a plant person,

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Speaker 4: but certain vines are like self starting, like you can

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Speaker 4: cut at your line and it'll regrow. So my mom

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Speaker 4: has a beautiful house in the valley, and it's covered

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Speaker 4: in all these gorgeous vines, and it all came from

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Speaker 4: a stema Disneyland.

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Speaker 3: Did she pick the stem at the end of your

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Speaker 3: trip to this man? Or was she like did she

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Speaker 3: throw it in her purse? How does that work?

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Speaker 4: I just remember looking over at her and she was

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Speaker 4: using a plastic knife. I love that, like the hot

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Speaker 4: dog stand and just suck.

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Speaker 3: This is what everyone and it's a beautiful vibe with

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Speaker 3: a beautiful trimming. Well, yeah, Disneyland does a fantastic joke.

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Speaker 3: I forgot that she did that. Thank you for reminding me. Well,

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Speaker 3: thank you for telling me. Yeah, we should be looting

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Speaker 3: plants at Disneyland. I think it's just a beautiful thing

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Speaker 3: to get your money's worse. Yes, what else are you

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Speaker 3: paying for? Bridger? Are you a Disneyland person? I'm not good.

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Speaker 3: That's healthy. I mean I'll go if people are going,

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Speaker 3: Oh god, But i mean, first of all, I'm against

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Speaker 3: how much it costs. Disgusting. If you go with a

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Speaker 3: bad crowd, you're just bored for hours on end. Oh

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Speaker 3: you're just trapped in line with nothing to say to

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Speaker 3: each other. I'll go occasionally. I'll go with my niece,

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Speaker 3: and that's a different healthy. That's healthy. I did go

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Speaker 3: about ten years ago. I want with some friends and

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Speaker 3: one friend had been there a year prior and met

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Speaker 3: this one June, who is obsessed with the peter Pan Ride.

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Speaker 3: In squib, I wish it was June's squib. She's obsessed June.

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Speaker 3: So they got married. He married June's squib. Underneath Cinderella's

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Speaker 3: castles are out. I'm at this door and like this

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Speaker 3: woman is her. She may very well be dead by now,

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Speaker 3: but she is obsessed with Peter Pan. And she says

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Speaker 3: that she wants she's always the last in line, uh

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Speaker 3: like three days a week at the Peter Pan Ride

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Speaker 3: so she can put Peter to bed. She's this woman

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Speaker 3: with this like huge hair. And we had been on

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Speaker 3: the tea cups and I was deeply sick from it,

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Speaker 3: and but I knew I wanted to meet this woman

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Speaker 3: her energy. We met her, and I was cured this.

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Speaker 3: She's the strangest person I've ever met. But be on

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Speaker 3: the lookout if you're at Disneyland of Peter Pan as

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Speaker 3: it's closing for June.

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Speaker 4: If she's stills the cure for coronavirus, she might be

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Speaker 4: she might be our you know, I just licked her.

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Speaker 3: And if we all can get a taste of June

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Speaker 3: yesked it in my mouth, June. But she's kind of amazing.

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Speaker 3: Disney people are, I'm sorry, they're the worst. The Disney session.

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Speaker 3: I don't know where it's coming from. And it feels

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Speaker 3: like a broken childhood. But it feels like it's maybe

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Speaker 3: more childhoods are being broken. I don't know, but I

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Speaker 3: just feel like it's maybe it's because also Disney's taking

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Speaker 3: over the world regardless. But oh yeah, well they own

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Speaker 3: like ninety percent I mean your podcast. Oh yeah, this

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Speaker 3: is a Disney this is a Disney property. It's going

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Speaker 3: to become an animated feature.

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Speaker 4: Biger is silently standing in the corner. I will say,

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Speaker 4: though all Disney hate a side. Bob Biger, is this,

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Speaker 4: hands down, full stop, the sexiest male CEO of any

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Speaker 4: major company.

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Speaker 3: Well, I have to look him up. Do you really think? No,

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Speaker 3: I'm picturing just the whitest man in the world. But

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Speaker 3: I'm going to decide whether that's true.

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Speaker 4: Okay, there are no pictures of him online shirtless, but

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Speaker 4: you can still get a pretty good sense of it

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Speaker 4: from him in a suit.

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Speaker 3: He is super tall, that's number one. Okay, he I

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Speaker 3: mean he's got an I'm not going to argue with you.

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Speaker 3: I'm not going to disagree. He's got a good look.

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Speaker 3: Kind of an if James Bond was an elf.

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Speaker 4: What that's so?

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Speaker 3: That was nasty?

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Speaker 2: What you just know?

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Speaker 3: I think I don't I think I don't think that's bad.

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Speaker 3: I think he has a you have to agree, a

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Speaker 3: mildly fantasy creature looks. He is the c of Disney. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: so it works like the sexiest elf on the planet. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I mean his ears are a little pointing. He guy's

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Speaker 3: kind of a little pointy nose. He got a glint

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Speaker 3: in his eye, but very good looking. He's super disagree

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Speaker 3: and he does the Versa climber every day. This is

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Speaker 3: part of his legend. That's a Versa climber.

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Speaker 4: Oh, it's just so funny to me because right now

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Speaker 4: is your record for next door to my Pilate studio,

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Speaker 4: which has Versa climbers.

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Speaker 3: It is a death trap. It's a cardio machine that's.

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Speaker 4: Just just a vertical It's like a long steel pole

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Speaker 4: with these moving handles and feet parts and his death

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Speaker 4: it is pure cardio.

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Speaker 3: It's so unpleasant. Your arms and legs are moving, your

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Speaker 3: arms and les are moving, and your arms are just

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Speaker 3: going like you're climbing a ladder or something.

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Speaker 4: It's like a yeah, it's like if Beal's above himself

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Speaker 4: created a ladder.

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Speaker 6: It's like a ladder from the just never ending pushing

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Speaker 6: the rock up the hill. But with a ladder it's

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Speaker 6: very sisphical.

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Speaker 3: Yes, that's what it should have been, Sisophonian climber god.

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Speaker 4: Bob.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Bob, we've decided you're a pretty good looking man.

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Speaker 3: I wonder how old is he's probably sixty three. I

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Speaker 3: think I put that out of sixty three for sixty three.

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Speaker 3: Come on, he looks good. Absolutely, I'm not going to disagree.

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Speaker 3: I mean, Dave Holmes was on recently and he was

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Speaker 3: trying to make an argument for Fred Durst being sexy,

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Speaker 3: and I had to disagree. But Bob Iger, I'm on board.

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Speaker 3: I'm absolutely on board. Welcome to the team, Bob, reach

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Speaker 3: out to us. We'll work something out.

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Speaker 4: You can monop believe me any day. Merge do a

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Speaker 4: merger with our genitals, Daddy, I'm open. Whatever you want.

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Speaker 3: I'm just kidding. Sorry whatever. Oh, I'm spent. Caroline, the

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Speaker 3: podcast is called I said no gifts here you are time?

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Speaker 3: Did you? You came here tonight with a gift what's

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Speaker 3: the I mean, do you want me to open it?

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Speaker 4: Okay, So before you open it, I want to just

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Speaker 4: tell you this is extra merchandise, okay, that I have

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Speaker 4: in my house.

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Speaker 3: Well, I'm not gonna say it. You're just we'll get

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Speaker 3: into this. I'm going to open up this bag. I'm

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Speaker 3: just gonna also say this bag was provided by me. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: but that's fine, that's fine.

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Speaker 4: Okay.

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Speaker 3: If I dragged me away, I'm going to drag you

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Speaker 3: expose me. Let's see here, I'm looking. Oh my god,

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Speaker 3: you're making such a show of it. You're like ripely

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Speaker 3: to the dishy paper. What. Oh my, this is incredible.

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Speaker 3: This is a Mariah care sticker sheet. Yeah, you brought me.

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Speaker 3: It looks like it's about ten to twelve photos of

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Speaker 3: Mariah Carey stickers. Are these official stickers or is this no?

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Speaker 3: These are yours?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: This is the official Sean pen. So this is almost

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Speaker 3: This feels like it's going to get you in legal trouble.

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Speaker 3: Oh oh well, I've I've flirted with much legal trouble

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Speaker 3: on my past. I mean, official Shan Pen feels like

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Speaker 3: just a legal trap for people who don't know. Do

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Speaker 3: you want to explain what.

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Speaker 4: So, I run a somewhat famous Instagram acount called official

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Speaker 4: shan Pen. I've run it for many years and it's

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Speaker 4: just basically like my love letter to all things pop culture.

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Speaker 3: It's like just my happy place. It's just like a

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Speaker 3: crazy insane, like horny, very very horny. It's it's great.

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Speaker 3: And I supplement my actual career income with chosh keys. Right.

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Speaker 4: I love merch, yes, I love merch, stickers, towels, blankets.

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Speaker 3: I own a I know you own a Judge Judy

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Speaker 3: blanket or a towel.

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Speaker 4: Oh and I'm making Judge study blankets as we speak,

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Speaker 4: but Corona is really holding them up.

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Speaker 3: That's a side story. Wait, so your Judge Judy beach

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Speaker 3: towel is official Sean Pen merch. Yes, so it's not

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Speaker 3: official Judge Judy. You are going to get sued.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, as you as you've brought up a couple of times,

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Speaker 4: using photos that you do not own and monetizing them

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Speaker 4: is highly illegal.

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Speaker 3: It's like rule number one. I can't wait for this

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Speaker 3: podcast to be played in Core. She knew what she

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Speaker 3: was doing. Okay, well, I've only had a couple close calls.

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Speaker 3: Here's the thing.

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Speaker 4: So it was like Caroline, how do you do it?

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Speaker 4: How do you print photos that again you do not

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Speaker 4: own on to merch and then sell said merch And

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Speaker 4: the answer is I don't know, bitch.

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Speaker 3: But I still keep doing it. Here's the thing you

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Speaker 3: have to avoid if you're out there. This is like

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Speaker 3: my lecture one oh one how to do this. Don't

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Speaker 3: avoid litigious celebrities. Never you Beyonce Taylor Rake Hi, Hello,

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00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:02,040
Speaker 3: you're asking for it. I will also tell you, don't

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Speaker 3: use Jehovah's Witness art. I made a fan page for

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00:20:05,359 --> 00:20:08,720
Speaker 3: the Jehovah's Witness art from their magazines. They shut it down.

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Speaker 3: My god, Jehovah's Witnesses were done. Don't use their art.

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Speaker 3: Isn't that like the whole point of religion to spreadge

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Speaker 3: I was helping get, I mean, get the word out

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Speaker 3: that their art looks insane.

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Speaker 4: It's like give you a gold plated horn or like

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Speaker 4: whatever is like the next level in Johah's Witness. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: they're very very protective of their IP. I guess ridiculous. Okay,

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Speaker 4: that's ridiculous, but.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so don't use Beyonce.

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Speaker 4: Neumbors and you know, just kind of fly under the radar.

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Speaker 4: Until you get caught. I've only been I've only been

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Speaker 4: caught twice. One was Oprah proper.

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Speaker 3: Oh that makes sense, Oprah Proper. Well, what had you

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Speaker 3: made with Oprah?

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Speaker 4: Well, I made notebooks and pouches that that were a

401
00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:52,679
Speaker 4: beautiful collage of her in her garden.

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Speaker 3: I love Oprah's garden content. She has a huge farm

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Speaker 3: in Hawaii.

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Speaker 4: She posts a lot of content on her Instagram of

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00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:02,840
Speaker 4: like her picking tomatoes, just like these bountiful cornicopia's and

406
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,159
Speaker 4: harvest it's just amazing. So it's just like this claw

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00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:07,040
Speaker 4: and she's like it was just so beautiful. I mean,

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00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:10,760
Speaker 4: it's still up for sale website. Stop Oprah sent me,

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Speaker 4: Harpo sent me a season assists. They're like, girl, you

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Speaker 4: can't do this. And I was like, got you And

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Speaker 4: I changed the name and I've been fine.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. And then also Anna Nicole Smith's lady

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Speaker 3: daddy like head. It definitely his name's Howard Stern. Howard

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Speaker 3: Stern was okay, So she has her baby is Danny

415
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Speaker 3: Lynn Burke. Oh okay.

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Speaker 4: And there was the paternity praternity thing. It was either

417
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Speaker 4: Howard K. Stern or was Larry burkehead but ted up

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00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:39,400
Speaker 4: Larr Burkehead. So Larry birkegs raising her in Kentucky out

419
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,720
Speaker 4: of limelight, and Larry Burkehead hit me up and he

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Speaker 4: was like, yo, like your toe discovered in pictures of

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Speaker 4: Annonicole Smith, Like we own her image.

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Speaker 3: And that's sorry. I'm busy making money off of my

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00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:55,399
Speaker 3: dead wife, not you. He's like, only only one can

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Speaker 3: play that game. He's like this town named big enough

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00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:01,360
Speaker 3: for the two of us. Anyway, So I've been pretty lucky.

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Speaker 4: It's more of a passion than it is anything else

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Speaker 4: for me, and a lot of people are like, Caroline,

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Speaker 4: get a.

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Speaker 3: Hobby, get a hobby, read a book.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it turns out making chosh keys and gouging the

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Speaker 4: prices from my loyal fans is a hobby.

432
00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,399
Speaker 3: What how much would the sticker sheet cost me? I mean,

433
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,520
Speaker 3: I know it's pretty okay, Well, a little tacky for

434
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 3: me to ask how much a gift would cost, But

435
00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:22,719
Speaker 3: I'm curious how much if I wanted to buy these

436
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:26,159
Speaker 3: stickers they retail They run you sex six, that's how

437
00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 3: bad they're like. They're beautiful, three high quality secrets. This

438
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:31,639
Speaker 3: looks like official Mariah merch. They will not.

439
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:33,600
Speaker 4: Scratch, they will not fade and be careful what you

440
00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:36,399
Speaker 4: put them on, because they won't come on. I'm really serious,

441
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:38,560
Speaker 4: these things will last four fuck it ever, they're the

442
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:41,320
Speaker 4: cocka roatism stickers. My friend just saw her in Vegas.

443
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:42,200
Speaker 3: I was like, how was it?

444
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:42,520
Speaker 4: How was it?

445
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 6: How was it?

446
00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:45,240
Speaker 3: Because I've only heard crazy stories? And he said that

447
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:46,879
Speaker 3: she's definitely on the right.

448
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,560
Speaker 4: I quote balance of meds right now, great And he

449
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:51,879
Speaker 4: said that she was walking and she was singing and

450
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:52,920
Speaker 4: she was doing a great job.

451
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,160
Speaker 3: I just heard a positive story about Mariah too, working

452
00:22:55,200 --> 00:22:58,679
Speaker 3: on some show and she was full professional. So Mariah,

453
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:02,439
Speaker 3: maybe she's Mariah fan? Oh of course, who isn't I mean?

454
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:04,480
Speaker 3: Do you have a favorite Maria song Maria album?

455
00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:06,680
Speaker 4: Oh? My god, I like all the B sides. On

456
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:10,680
Speaker 4: the sides, I mean they're so well my Okay. My

457
00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:13,399
Speaker 4: favorite song is definitely we Belong Together. Okay, that's like

458
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:16,159
Speaker 4: my classic karaoke jam. Have you ever tried to sing

459
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 4: a Mariah song at karaoke?

460
00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:21,080
Speaker 6: I can't sing at all. I can't sing happy Birthday? Really,

461
00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 6: I capy birthday is kind of low key hard to sing,

462
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:24,440
Speaker 6: is it really?

463
00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:25,320
Speaker 3: I think so?

464
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:28,240
Speaker 4: It's because it's here's the thing, with Happy Birthday, there's

465
00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:31,359
Speaker 4: no like agreed upon key I feel and I'm always

466
00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:32,639
Speaker 4: like the minute.

467
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:38,080
Speaker 3: Before I start, I'm like, I go like three different scales.

468
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:40,560
Speaker 3: That that does make sense. Maybe that's why there's such

469
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,800
Speaker 3: a learning curve because nobody can get on the same page.

470
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,000
Speaker 3: And the first lines are pretty easy. It's like happy

471
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:45,879
Speaker 3: birthday to you.

472
00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:49,800
Speaker 4: No, no, no, And then it's like towards the end,

473
00:23:49,880 --> 00:23:51,640
Speaker 4: I feel like things start to kind of go off

474
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:53,960
Speaker 4: the rails, right, and I'm always like.

475
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:58,639
Speaker 3: Kind of getting into it.

476
00:23:58,840 --> 00:24:00,480
Speaker 4: It's just and then you have a The other and

477
00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:02,520
Speaker 4: the other thing with Happy Birthday is like it's one

478
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:03,639
Speaker 4: thing to sing a song alone.

479
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:05,159
Speaker 3: Won't you have people in your ears?

480
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:05,439
Speaker 1: Oh?

481
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:07,920
Speaker 3: Of course, it's like, oh I need to be the star.

482
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 3: It's just like too much. I will say I will

483
00:24:11,119 --> 00:24:14,120
Speaker 3: sing Judas Priest breaking the Law because it's just screaming.

484
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 3: And at one point in a competition, I say Angels

485
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:21,120
Speaker 3: among Us. Oh my god, my face, by the way,

486
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:23,640
Speaker 3: for the listeners is completely blank. Both those songs are nothing.

487
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:26,040
Speaker 3: You don't know either. The song's breaking the law. You've

488
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:28,960
Speaker 3: got you have to be look at me. I'm a Jewish.

489
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:32,800
Speaker 3: I'm a fucking Jewish your way home. You're going to

490
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 3: be blasting breaking the law, Okay, Bridger, I know, I will.

491
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:38,680
Speaker 3: I will listen to it. It's a story of a

492
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:41,640
Speaker 3: man down on his luck who's forced to break the law.

493
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:46,399
Speaker 3: You lost me it man, and it's just screaming you

494
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:47,920
Speaker 3: got it, you got to hear. And then the second

495
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:50,119
Speaker 3: one was like some fucking Jove's with this hymnal is

496
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:52,640
Speaker 3: It is like a weird country song about angels living

497
00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:55,879
Speaker 3: among us or something, okay, which I mean obviously the

498
00:24:56,720 --> 00:24:57,959
Speaker 3: Private Dancer. I'll do that too.

499
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 4: Oh Okay, okay, I will say angels living a among us.

500
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:02,200
Speaker 4: That song sounds more like a Mariah song.

501
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,879
Speaker 3: I could see her doing an angel She probably has

502
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 3: sung at it like a Christmas or my wheelhouse.

503
00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:12,520
Speaker 4: Anyway, Oh, I love Mariah. I mean, there's just I

504
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:15,199
Speaker 4: don't even know where to start. It's like her one

505
00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:17,399
Speaker 4: of her most recent album first of all, her album

506
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:20,080
Speaker 4: that just came out in twenty eighteen or twenty eighteen

507
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 4: is one of the best.

508
00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:22,399
Speaker 3: Albums of like the last five. I feel like I've

509
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:24,400
Speaker 3: heard a couple of songs off it, and she continues

510
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 3: to make good pop songs right like she she knows

511
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 3: what she's ameless.

512
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 4: She can't do no wrong, like bipolar disorder has not

513
00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:34,159
Speaker 4: held her back. Her memoir is apparently coming out this Christmas.

514
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:34,640
Speaker 4: I can't wait.

515
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 3: Oh beautiful, okay, this Christmas. That's why someone just told me.

516
00:25:38,320 --> 00:25:39,760
Speaker 3: Okay anyway.

517
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:41,959
Speaker 4: But her album before that was called I don't want

518
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:43,080
Speaker 4: to get this wrong, but I think I know it.

519
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:46,320
Speaker 4: Me dot dot dot, I am Mariah dot dot dot.

520
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,920
Speaker 3: The Elusive Sean TuS fuck. I think this sounds familiar.

521
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,639
Speaker 3: This sounds that feels at least close to.

522
00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:54,600
Speaker 4: What it was like, very similar to the Harley Quinn.

523
00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:56,959
Speaker 4: Steven is nodding, Yes, I got exactly right.

524
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:02,639
Speaker 3: So me more at myself. Me dot dot dot no, no,

525
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,880
Speaker 3: me period. I am Mariah dot dot dot the Elusive

526
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:08,520
Speaker 3: Sean twos. I'm like, oh, the content was not right

527
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 3: at that time? And how is the music on that

528
00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:13,080
Speaker 3: album not great? There's a couple okays.

529
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:14,120
Speaker 1: Are you a Maria fan?

530
00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:14,560
Speaker 4: Yes?

531
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 3: Karaoke jam Oh, dream Lover is incredible? I mean, who

532
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 3: can resist dream Lover? Oh? Yeah, Caution was scene with Caution.

533
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 4: I love that album, That whole album, like topped about Him,

534
00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:31,919
Speaker 4: James Walla wall so good. Oh, I'm getting the chillest

535
00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:34,000
Speaker 4: thing with my queen aries. Queen, we have birthdays one

536
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 4: day apart.

537
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:36,879
Speaker 3: Can you tell? I think it's obvious you have a

538
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:42,720
Speaker 3: total Mariah energy, I know, unhinged, completely just unpredictlous. I'm

539
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:46,880
Speaker 3: melting down everywhere she goes. I will say, the last

540
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:48,719
Speaker 3: time I saw you, we were you were, I mean,

541
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:52,120
Speaker 3: you were making a scene and didn't Typhoon. You made

542
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:57,080
Speaker 3: a major scene that was a diva moment. It was though,

543
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 3: I mean, I think it resulted in you getting like

544
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 3: a free sprite. Didn't we get more than that? I

545
00:27:02,920 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 3: don't think, I mean the result was absolutely not in

546
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 3: comparison to the scene made we did. Didn't Typhoon really

547
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:16,240
Speaker 3: let us down. I feel like you made a good effort.

548
00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:18,520
Speaker 3: We get if we dessert, we didn't get anything. I

549
00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 3: don't remember being I think they took like your soda off. Yeah,

550
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:28,639
Speaker 3: that's not nothing. I think the issue, Okay, didn't Typhon.

551
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:31,520
Speaker 4: As a restaurant in Los Angeles, there's really long waits

552
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 4: and that one night it was like really crowded, which

553
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,000
Speaker 4: is part of the course, right, I'm like almost struggling

554
00:27:38,040 --> 00:27:38,439
Speaker 4: to remember.

555
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:39,880
Speaker 3: I kind of know what my issue was, but I'm

556
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:42,480
Speaker 3: afraid to say because it's so embarrassing. I think that

557
00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:47,200
Speaker 3: the issue was they were getting Yes, we waited a

558
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 3: very long time and didn't Typhoon kind of poses itself

559
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:55,280
Speaker 3: as a kind of a nice environment, like a nice restaurant,

560
00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:58,440
Speaker 3: and this was it felt like we were in the

561
00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 3: back of a costco. They put us.

562
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:05,120
Speaker 4: They put us in the fucking kitty section, daycare section,

563
00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:08,760
Speaker 4: which I know, it's like, I'm not a monster, of course,

564
00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 4: I want people to have the freedom to bring their

565
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 4: babies out. But they really sat as in the kids section.

566
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:16,480
Speaker 4: It was really and look at me, I am I'm

567
00:28:16,520 --> 00:28:17,760
Speaker 4: a classy woman.

568
00:28:18,280 --> 00:28:20,720
Speaker 3: From a per class from shop to b per.

569
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:24,920
Speaker 4: Glass, donut cereal like you name it, baby, and I

570
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,720
Speaker 4: don't know, they sat us in a weird section that

571
00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:29,400
Speaker 4: we were surrounded by crying babies. We were getting awful,

572
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:31,880
Speaker 4: awful servicely like didn't bring us one of our items,

573
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 4: and that was like that was the powder keg. I

574
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:37,440
Speaker 4: needed to start, as I like to call it, making

575
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:40,160
Speaker 4: a fuss, making a ruggers, making a fuss.

576
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:43,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I don't know, I was like going off,

577
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:45,640
Speaker 3: chipping away. I don't know.

578
00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:47,560
Speaker 4: And you know what, here's the thing, with complaining at

579
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:49,400
Speaker 4: a restaurant. Sometimes you don't know what the endgame is.

580
00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 4: You don't even know what you want until they give

581
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:53,960
Speaker 4: it to you, of course, and usually it results in

582
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 4: like a free dessert or you know, like a free meal,

583
00:28:56,800 --> 00:29:00,680
Speaker 4: a free dish. In general, I like, I'm going to complain.

584
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:04,240
Speaker 4: I'm just ready to accept anything they give me. Beyond that,

585
00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 4: unless there's been a real scenario, I won't push further

586
00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 4: than that, I'll push especially if there's a real scenario,

587
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 4: and even in the absence of a real scenario. But

588
00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:15,240
Speaker 4: what was also agg me on is I was with you, obviously,

589
00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 4: and my boyfriend John, who so wonderful manner.

590
00:29:19,880 --> 00:29:21,640
Speaker 3: He's the most mild mannered man on the.

591
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:25,800
Speaker 4: Planet, the mild mannered man, and obviously like when I'm

592
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:27,720
Speaker 4: with two mild mannered men.

593
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:29,480
Speaker 3: Like that gets me going.

594
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:31,880
Speaker 4: I like love to put up a show like I

595
00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:34,280
Speaker 4: know I'm making you guys uncomfortable, Like I can't stop.

596
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:38,120
Speaker 3: It's just like I I gotta keep going. I don't

597
00:29:38,120 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 3: know what it is. Yeah, sickness, I'm sick. It feels

598
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:44,920
Speaker 3: like a real illness sex. But I feel like you

599
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:48,480
Speaker 3: were also you were like screaming in anyone you were.

600
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:52,640
Speaker 3: You were very polite. Let's make that very clear. Yes,

601
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 3: like no one got fired that no employee you spoke

602
00:29:57,200 --> 00:29:58,240
Speaker 3: to us uncomfortable.

603
00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:00,760
Speaker 4: I was just like, we're getting awful service. You have

604
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:06,840
Speaker 4: sat us surrounded by a bunch of like unvaccinated little

605
00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:08,040
Speaker 4: freaks or something.

606
00:30:08,120 --> 00:30:09,840
Speaker 3: I don't know. We were just sat in like the

607
00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:13,560
Speaker 3: worst of the Glendale. I mean it's a weird location.

608
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:17,040
Speaker 4: Am I in a Glendale Armenian childcare center? Or am

609
00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 4: I in a denttiphon enjoying my Friday night? Me?

610
00:30:19,240 --> 00:30:19,840
Speaker 3: All okay?

611
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:22,920
Speaker 4: And I can say that some Persian Persian thank you

612
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:25,920
Speaker 4: for clarify, because, as everyone listening knows, is the same

613
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:29,960
Speaker 4: as Armenia. So yeah, anyway, you know, I mean, what

614
00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:33,080
Speaker 4: what have I complained about recently? I mean, well, I

615
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 4: really light up when it's customer service, when I'm like

616
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:39,959
Speaker 4: going customer service, well, especially when it's like a website

617
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:42,520
Speaker 4: or like my credit card company. Like I have said

618
00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:45,160
Speaker 4: things on the phone to representatives at Alaskan Airlines that

619
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:48,120
Speaker 4: you you would not believe came out of my mouth.

620
00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 3: What drove you to this? They're just a normally incurred

621
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:52,280
Speaker 3: change fee.

622
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 4: My go to thing now by my go to thing

623
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,040
Speaker 4: now is like if I have any issue with anything,

624
00:30:58,280 --> 00:30:59,680
Speaker 4: you know, when I'm on the phone, I can say anything,

625
00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:03,320
Speaker 4: you know, right, I always say, I'm a single mother,

626
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 4: and I know this, twenty five dollars change fee or

627
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:09,960
Speaker 4: late fee whatever answert be here might not seem like

628
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 4: a lot to you, but to me as a single mother,

629
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:14,600
Speaker 4: that's a week's groceries.

630
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,440
Speaker 3: For me and my kids. I have like the same line,

631
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 3: this is insane behavior. No it's not, Yes, it is.

632
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:24,080
Speaker 3: I'm so I'm going to start using that line. That

633
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:27,640
Speaker 3: is perfect. I mean, that works perfectly, and I bet

634
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:30,360
Speaker 3: it works every time. I'm a single mother and an

635
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 3: elder and the Jehovah's witness. I'm a Jehovah's Witness elder,

636
00:31:35,280 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 3: and that's just groceries for my parish. I will say,

637
00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 3: maybe do this to companies that you don't agree with politically,

638
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:45,920
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, like New Balance, right, really good one. Yeah.

639
00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:48,120
Speaker 3: Or you know, call into Chick fil A and say

640
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 3: you had a bad sandwich and you get a free sandwich.

641
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:55,040
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, that's that's like easy, that's that's yeah, that's

642
00:31:55,160 --> 00:31:55,840
Speaker 4: entry level shit.

643
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 3: But I'm a pe you're running a full Yeah, I

644
00:31:58,720 --> 00:32:00,960
Speaker 3: mean scam. You mean time about twenty four hours and

645
00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:04,000
Speaker 3: it's to refound me five hundred dollars. That's a true story,

646
00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 3: and I won't bore you. Wow, that is incredible. Have

647
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:13,000
Speaker 3: you had any legitimately bad service scenarios where like this

648
00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 3: was justified behavior, because God bless none of you.

649
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:19,960
Speaker 4: Yes, no, I'm playing it up right now. But I

650
00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 4: stand up for my rights as a consumer. These companies,

651
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,080
Speaker 4: Bernie Sanders much. They're not looking out for you, Okay,

652
00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 4: Sure they're They're trying to fuck you over. And if

653
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:28,880
Speaker 4: you don't look out for yourself and you don't stand

654
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:31,120
Speaker 4: up for yourself, you will get taken for a ride,

655
00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 4: ridden and hard and put away wet by these companies.

656
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 3: Okay. And I I'm not afraid to stand up for myself.

657
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:43,200
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna let class pass. Fucking I don't know

658
00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 4: twenty four hour fitness like anyone. I'm not gonna let

659
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:49,720
Speaker 4: anyone take me for a ride. They're gouging you, they're

660
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:52,400
Speaker 4: up charging you. You have to stand up for yourself.

661
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:55,080
Speaker 4: My concern, and I fully I'm fully on board with

662
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:58,200
Speaker 4: that aspect of it. But the person that I'm worried

663
00:32:58,200 --> 00:32:59,840
Speaker 4: about is the customer service.

664
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:02,239
Speaker 3: With I lead with love. I always lead with love.

665
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:03,680
Speaker 3: That's by the way. That's number one.

666
00:33:03,880 --> 00:33:08,120
Speaker 4: You can track more fies with donut cereal with anything else,

667
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 4: And I always that's the thing. By the way, I'm

668
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:15,040
Speaker 4: so evolved in my mind games, like it's not about screaming.

669
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 4: Screaming is like last resort. Sure, It's like, don't you

670
00:33:18,240 --> 00:33:22,560
Speaker 4: understand where I'm coming from. It's like total I'm reaching

671
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,720
Speaker 4: my hand across the aisle and I'm like, you get it.

672
00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:29,680
Speaker 3: I'm a single mom. I mean, there's the various plots

673
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:32,480
Speaker 3: and little tricks you've come up with, feel like you're

674
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 3: like brainstorming these at home? Is this something you do ever? Here?

675
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 3: It's just like work and my and I come from

676
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 3: a family that does stuff like this. I was raised

677
00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 3: like this.

678
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 4: I mean like my oh my god, like my dad.

679
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:50,320
Speaker 4: My dad taught me this stuff. He'd be like watch Carolyn,

680
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:52,480
Speaker 4: Like watch how I talk to the like the Sprint

681
00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:56,920
Speaker 4: customer service people like and I remember him on the phone.

682
00:33:56,960 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 4: I was a little being like we're friends, Like will

683
00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:02,960
Speaker 4: you get it? Or the one thing you always do

684
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:05,440
Speaker 4: is if you're a longtime customer somewhere, you always go

685
00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 4: like I'm been a proud Sprint customer for fifteen years,

686
00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:11,760
Speaker 4: and there's no one else I would ever.

687
00:34:12,280 --> 00:34:16,160
Speaker 3: Want to be in business with my cell phone. And like,

688
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 3: of course, I don't know, it's it is.

689
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:22,359
Speaker 4: It is crazy and I'm playing it up right now.

690
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 4: I'm not like trying to get refunded on everything.

691
00:34:25,080 --> 00:34:27,799
Speaker 3: I buy only most things, but.

692
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's I Look, I'm telling you right now, you're brainwashed.

693
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:37,000
Speaker 4: If you think that what I'm doing is wrong, you've

694
00:34:37,040 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 4: been brainwashed by.

695
00:34:37,680 --> 00:34:44,200
Speaker 3: The big I will I will complain. I absolutely will complain,

696
00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:46,239
Speaker 3: but maybe I just need to complain more often. I'm

697
00:34:46,239 --> 00:34:47,640
Speaker 3: not going to do it in a mom and pop store.

698
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:50,359
Speaker 3: But of course, actually I will complain to a mom

699
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 3: and pop store if I like it and something has

700
00:34:52,239 --> 00:34:54,560
Speaker 3: gone wrong, because I'll tell them if you know, I

701
00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 3: don't want them to close down.

702
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,400
Speaker 4: My favorite people to run scams on. By the way,

703
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,720
Speaker 4: are these new like millennial disrupt of companies.

704
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 3: I'm out of control. I really am out of control.

705
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:09,160
Speaker 3: But I cannot wait to visit you in person. It's

706
00:35:09,239 --> 00:35:12,239
Speaker 3: going to be incredible. But you'll get to prison and

707
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:14,840
Speaker 3: there are plenty of scams to run there. Oh god,

708
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:18,360
Speaker 3: I mean, I mean right now, out here in the

709
00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:23,920
Speaker 3: free world, that's nothing. Once I'm confined four and you

710
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:26,200
Speaker 3: have the I mean all day to think about these things.

711
00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 3: You're going to get the presidency?

712
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:29,399
Speaker 1: Oh god?

713
00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:33,640
Speaker 3: Oh yeah? Have you ever worked as a customer service representative?

714
00:35:33,800 --> 00:35:37,440
Speaker 3: You know what? I? Yes, okay, I have. What did

715
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:40,960
Speaker 3: you do? Well? Okay? I worked as a telemarketer, which

716
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:41,720
Speaker 3: is kind of similar.

717
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:45,799
Speaker 4: Right in college, the best job in my college town

718
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:50,000
Speaker 4: that maid the most was telemarketing for a big a

719
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,640
Speaker 4: farming company that sold big farming equipment.

720
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:55,720
Speaker 3: You're telemarketing farming equipment.

721
00:35:55,760 --> 00:35:59,520
Speaker 4: Basically you would call farmers like hi, like, can we

722
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:04,400
Speaker 4: tell you more about our big like tractor tills and stuff?

723
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:05,040
Speaker 3: Wow?

724
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,279
Speaker 4: And I was so good at it because once a court,

725
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 4: I'm like such a people person, and when it's like

726
00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:13,400
Speaker 4: a lonely farmer on the other end, I'd be like,

727
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:14,360
Speaker 4: what are you doing?

728
00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:19,399
Speaker 3: Oh? I love farming like I love it too.

729
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:23,000
Speaker 6: You've had four relationships with farmers and then I got

730
00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:27,400
Speaker 6: promoted to surveys where you just call existing customers and

731
00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 6: you ask them to rate their director tills.

732
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 3: It's like on a scale of one to ten, like

733
00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 3: how good did it? Till they're like ten? I gotta

734
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:38,520
Speaker 3: say ten. I'm like amazingly put that down.

735
00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:41,640
Speaker 4: I'm like, on a scale of one to ten, Like,

736
00:36:42,520 --> 00:36:46,560
Speaker 4: were you satisfied like with the hitch, Oh my god,

737
00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:48,120
Speaker 4: this is yeah.

738
00:36:48,320 --> 00:36:51,080
Speaker 3: But prior to that, you were just cold calling farmers.

739
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 3: Where are they getting the is there a farmer registry?

740
00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 3: Where's this information coming from?

741
00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 6: It?

742
00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,920
Speaker 3: It was like a proper company they had the info.

743
00:36:59,080 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 4: I don't know.

744
00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:01,080
Speaker 1: I have no idea.

745
00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:06,240
Speaker 3: Why are you asking me about this podcast you're gonna

746
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:12,640
Speaker 3: call it Karen? I am emailing you anonymously? Why I

747
00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:14,920
Speaker 3: would never? I would never never, I would never ownder.

748
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 3: Have you gotten any complaints about your merch.

749
00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:31,120
Speaker 4: So, Maddy, Well, my favorite thing about my merch store,

750
00:37:31,160 --> 00:37:33,600
Speaker 4: and like my whole audience and my fans is like,

751
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:35,880
Speaker 4: I'm gonna be honest with you. My fans are not

752
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 4: let mean, how do I put this politically? There are

753
00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:41,640
Speaker 4: a bunch of stupid assholes.

754
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:47,760
Speaker 3: There are a bunch of you absolutely despise the people

755
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:48,919
Speaker 3: that are things.

756
00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 4: I love my fans, but like they would agree, they

757
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:54,760
Speaker 4: are a bunch of like horny dumb bitches.

758
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:57,920
Speaker 3: Well that makes sense. A lot of stoners. I used

759
00:37:57,920 --> 00:37:59,600
Speaker 3: to be like way more public about how much weed.

760
00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:02,440
Speaker 3: I smoke. I've cut down talking about that, but like

761
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:04,440
Speaker 3: it was so many stoner girls, and I would get

762
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:07,319
Speaker 3: the craziest emails. I still get them.

763
00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,839
Speaker 4: I always get emails, and this must be at any

764
00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:11,600
Speaker 4: major company, but it blows my mind every time. And

765
00:38:11,719 --> 00:38:15,560
Speaker 4: they go hi, like like it's been months since they

766
00:38:15,640 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 4: ordered something, and they go hi. I just realized, like

767
00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 4: I put in my address wrong, can you send me

768
00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:24,280
Speaker 4: a new thing? And like do you put in your address?

769
00:38:24,360 --> 00:38:26,360
Speaker 1: Wrote that's on you.

770
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:29,080
Speaker 4: The best was one time, Oh, I almost want to

771
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 4: pull up the email. Let me see if I can

772
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 4: pull up. I'm talking were this girl email me and

773
00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 4: she was like, hey, like I've had some problems with

774
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:40,240
Speaker 4: my mailbox, like basically someone stole it or like someone

775
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:41,960
Speaker 4: hit it with their car and I don't have a

776
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:45,080
Speaker 4: mailbox right now. It was like the most unhinged email. Fuck,

777
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:46,239
Speaker 4: I hope I can't find it, but I don't think

778
00:38:46,239 --> 00:38:46,880
Speaker 4: I'm gonna be able to.

779
00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:50,320
Speaker 3: But it was basically run over her mailbox someone she

780
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:51,040
Speaker 3: couldn't receive mail.

781
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:52,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, and she's like, can you resend me something? I'm like,

782
00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:56,920
Speaker 4: uh no, your personal mail. Let me know when you've

783
00:38:56,920 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 4: built the mailbox and we'll talk. I want to see

784
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:03,520
Speaker 4: some improvement. I want to see some effort on your end, please.

785
00:39:03,960 --> 00:39:05,879
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it was like one of the all time.

786
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:06,719
Speaker 3: Did I find it?

787
00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:07,480
Speaker 4: I don't think so.

788
00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 3: It was, it was, it was amazing. It's a lot

789
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 3: of like dumb girls. I mean, is there ever a

790
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 3: legitimate complaint or you just I feel like you. I mean,

791
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:19,680
Speaker 3: you're essentially a slumlord on Instagram essentially. I so now

792
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:22,839
Speaker 3: you're I mean doing some sort of responsible manufacturing.

793
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:25,160
Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, at the very early days, I made this

794
00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:28,600
Speaker 4: towel called quote the dad Bod towel, which it was.

795
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:31,400
Speaker 3: It was beautiful, and it's covered in pictures of shirtless

796
00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:33,760
Speaker 3: male celebrities that had dad bod. That's like when dadbods

797
00:39:33,760 --> 00:39:35,600
Speaker 3: were things like many years ago, twenty twelve.

798
00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:40,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, seriously, And anyway, it was. I wouldn't call it

799
00:39:40,120 --> 00:39:41,960
Speaker 4: as much as a towel as they would a shroud.

800
00:39:42,239 --> 00:39:44,560
Speaker 4: I guess, like this shroud. It was very like shroud

801
00:39:44,640 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 4: of turin s.

802
00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:49,759
Speaker 5: It was so thin, like so on towel, like like

803
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:54,160
Speaker 5: just a huge piece of tissue basically just dissolves and water.

804
00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,640
Speaker 3: And rightfully, so people are like, what the fuck is this?

805
00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:00,440
Speaker 3: I'm like, I don't know where are you finding manufacturers? Oh?

806
00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:02,120
Speaker 3: I don't even want to tell you.

807
00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 1: I am like.

808
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:07,760
Speaker 3: China.

809
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:12,280
Speaker 4: You're just I'm like the problem. I'm what's making America.

810
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,000
Speaker 4: I'm like why Trump was elected?

811
00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:17,320
Speaker 3: So is there everybody? Have you ever issued a refund

812
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:17,760
Speaker 3: or anything?

813
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:17,920
Speaker 2: Oh?

814
00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:20,920
Speaker 4: Whit issue refunds all the time. I'm very giving with Refundsay,

815
00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:22,600
Speaker 4: are you kidding? I condition I can.

816
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:25,839
Speaker 3: This is what I need to hear from you. Oh

817
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:26,920
Speaker 3: my god, I'm free with refunds.

818
00:40:26,960 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 4: If anyone's like this took too long, I don't like it,

819
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:32,040
Speaker 4: I'm just like taking a refund and I'm wow, Oh yeah,

820
00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:32,680
Speaker 4: I'm pretty.

821
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:35,200
Speaker 3: Easy with those. Are you developing any any new merch

822
00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 3: right now? You will die when you hear about some

823
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,919
Speaker 3: of my new march It is so good. I'm really

824
00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:44,120
Speaker 3: proud of some of this. Okay, Oh, trade secrets do

825
00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:44,960
Speaker 3: do do?

826
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,279
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm excited. That was a space Jam theme. I

827
00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:50,879
Speaker 4: meant to sing mission in post. I started saying space

828
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:55,160
Speaker 4: Jam come up and jam okay, So okay. I never

829
00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,240
Speaker 4: wanted making some socks with beautiful little They're like short

830
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 4: like ankle socks with a little.

831
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:04,120
Speaker 3: Embroidered things on them. Faces. What okay, So one is

832
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:07,640
Speaker 3: a sock with Danny DeVito's face imped on incredible. That

833
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,839
Speaker 3: is like an accurate portrayal of him. It's pretty nice. Wow,

834
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:12,440
Speaker 3: it's a drawing right.

835
00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:14,719
Speaker 4: And by the way, that is one of two Dandy

836
00:41:14,760 --> 00:41:18,120
Speaker 4: de Vito products that you will be hearing about, one

837
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:20,160
Speaker 4: with Keanu Reeves's face on it kind of cute and

838
00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 4: then one with I think, WHOOPI Goldberg's face.

839
00:41:22,239 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 3: If I remember feeling the thing that.

840
00:41:23,640 --> 00:41:26,320
Speaker 4: I'm really excited about and making a Judge Judy blanket

841
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:29,080
Speaker 4: full blown like a beautiful chemistry.

842
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:33,640
Speaker 3: It's like a woven tapestry. Wow, gorgeous. Wow, that sounds beautiful.

843
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:36,120
Speaker 4: Just in time for her retirement, just in time for

844
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:38,360
Speaker 4: her coming out on support of Bloomberg and going on

845
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:40,080
Speaker 4: record and thinks you do anything to stop at Bernie

846
00:41:40,120 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 4: Sanders presidency.

847
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:44,840
Speaker 3: I mean, Judge Judy, I think we, I mean we

848
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 3: should have seen that coming. She's like the richest person

849
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:52,360
Speaker 3: in the country. She's unbelievably wealthy and has made a

850
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 3: career off of like poor people fighting with each other.

851
00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,359
Speaker 3: It's not even a court. But honestly, I love good

852
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:01,359
Speaker 3: for you. The thing is like I had to think

853
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:02,080
Speaker 3: long and hard about this.

854
00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:03,880
Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, Jude, Judy's kind of exposed herself to

855
00:42:03,920 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 4: be problematic, like should I still do this beautiful tapestry?

856
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 4: But then I really thought about it, and I realized,

857
00:42:10,120 --> 00:42:13,160
Speaker 4: like Judge Judy could literally endorse like Ted Cruz and

858
00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 4: I would still probably be a stan. She could like

859
00:42:16,760 --> 00:42:19,640
Speaker 4: go on the record and endorse like female circumcision.

860
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:22,520
Speaker 3: I'd be like, damn, like that one hurt. But that's

861
00:42:22,560 --> 00:42:26,760
Speaker 3: my girl. Okay, So here's the thing, this last product.

862
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:30,279
Speaker 3: I want to make sure you're sitting down. I'm going

863
00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 3: to continue sitting throughout this.

864
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:35,680
Speaker 4: Are you familiar with wife Fu pillows? Of course, I'm

865
00:42:36,080 --> 00:42:39,560
Speaker 4: working on it's not I haven't found the right artist

866
00:42:39,680 --> 00:42:42,759
Speaker 4: yet making a full blown double sided Danny DeVito waife

867
00:42:42,760 --> 00:42:45,719
Speaker 4: Fu pillow, oh beautifully drunk life.

868
00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:48,600
Speaker 3: I guess it would be like a four foot long

869
00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:50,680
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I mean he's about that tall.

870
00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:53,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, so it would be like a beautiful anime rendering

871
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:55,200
Speaker 4: of him on one side goes on on the other

872
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 4: side shirtless.

873
00:42:56,280 --> 00:42:59,239
Speaker 3: That is incredible. I'm really excited. Well, I've been on

874
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:00,880
Speaker 3: the fence about all what's celebrity to do.

875
00:43:00,960 --> 00:43:04,560
Speaker 4: It's like nineties, Jerry Seinfeld popped into mind, Paul Giamani

876
00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:06,960
Speaker 4: popped into mind, Regis Philbin.

877
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:10,040
Speaker 3: Regis would be kind of funny. Yeah, absolutely were a

878
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 3: little niche though. Let me let me see if I

879
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 3: can think of somebody I don't want to fill on

880
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:16,520
Speaker 3: the spot. Oh god, I'm going to make a list

881
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 3: because I feel like there's somebody out there that will.

882
00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:22,200
Speaker 3: I mean, once you launched Danny, people are gonna want

883
00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:24,480
Speaker 3: other wife who pillows. It will be thirsting for my wife.

884
00:43:24,719 --> 00:43:28,359
Speaker 3: Are there usually is this? Are there other male wife

885
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 3: who pillows? I don't know the culture. I feel like

886
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:34,040
Speaker 3: it's usually anime girls, right, Yeah, so this might be

887
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:36,320
Speaker 3: you might be breaking new ground here, it might be

888
00:43:36,920 --> 00:43:40,240
Speaker 3: making taboo. So you're out there talking to just various

889
00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:42,600
Speaker 3: anime artists about Danny DeVito. I'm out there in the

890
00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:46,000
Speaker 3: anime scene, just asked in the questions, Well, I hope

891
00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:49,279
Speaker 3: that you find somebody because that pillow sounds I will.

892
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:53,560
Speaker 3: I uh. In two thousand, I think twenty fifteen, I

893
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:56,640
Speaker 3: had a dream that Danny DeVito and Ria Pearlman were

894
00:43:56,680 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 3: going to get a divorce. Oh my god. Months later

895
00:43:59,280 --> 00:44:03,480
Speaker 3: they announced this, and I use to this day think

896
00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:05,319
Speaker 3: of myself as a soothsayer.

897
00:44:05,560 --> 00:44:07,799
Speaker 4: You're not as soon say you're a harbinger of doo.

898
00:44:08,600 --> 00:44:11,319
Speaker 4: You manifested. Can you imagine that in my life?

899
00:44:11,480 --> 00:44:15,320
Speaker 3: Oh? I watch how do you think I felt? I

900
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:18,759
Speaker 3: was devastated? But then they've patched it up. That's what

901
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:21,359
Speaker 3: they say, Like what's going on? I think they love

902
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 3: each other. I think Danny had some you know his

903
00:44:24,840 --> 00:44:28,640
Speaker 3: eyes were wandering. Oh god, he's like four nights. Yeah,

904
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:33,120
Speaker 3: that makeup secks like where that shit hit? Oh? Absolutely,

905
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 3: undenial different. Yeah, those two they're back together, and I'm

906
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,839
Speaker 3: happy for them. I love Rio, I love her too.

907
00:44:41,239 --> 00:44:44,200
Speaker 3: Maybe it was so talented. He directed Matilda, of course,

908
00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:47,600
Speaker 3: it's fantastic. He also directed Uh, I haven't seen it,

909
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:50,160
Speaker 3: but Death to Smoochie, Oh my god, I've never seen

910
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:51,920
Speaker 3: it either. We should do a movie night. Yeah. I

911
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:56,160
Speaker 3: feel like he's like an accomplished director on some level. Yeah,

912
00:44:56,239 --> 00:44:58,440
Speaker 3: and then he's very funny and just seems like an

913
00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:00,920
Speaker 3: all around good guy I'm obsessed with. And then Rio's

914
00:45:01,040 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 3: you know, doing her thing, absolutely woman, absolute power couple.

915
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:07,239
Speaker 3: So you've got to do something with Rio, j Loo

916
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 3: and Aron who of course give me a break for

917
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:12,919
Speaker 3: those two give me Danny and Rhea I need any

918
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:15,080
Speaker 3: day of the year. We're going to move to the

919
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:17,319
Speaker 3: game portion of this podcast, and I think you're going

920
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:20,920
Speaker 3: to be good with this. It's called game Master. Okay, No,

921
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 3: it's the what is it called. It's called gift Master. Okay,

922
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 3: We're going to play a game called gift Master. But

923
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:31,600
Speaker 3: I need a number between one and ten from you.

924
00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:37,360
Speaker 3: All right, Well, I'm calculating you. I mean, you've stormed

925
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:39,800
Speaker 3: in here and promoted the hell out of your merchandise already.

926
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:43,359
Speaker 3: But you can promote whatever you want, recommend anything until

927
00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:44,520
Speaker 3: I come back. Okay.

928
00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:46,560
Speaker 4: So I want to talk about a show that I

929
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:48,600
Speaker 4: wrote for that's coming out on TBS in May. It's

930
00:45:48,640 --> 00:45:51,399
Speaker 4: called Chad Starting to Seem Padra. You guys are gonna

931
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:53,880
Speaker 4: love it. Check that out when it comes out. And

932
00:45:54,080 --> 00:45:56,279
Speaker 4: I'm doing a new podcast for Comedy Central called This

933
00:45:56,400 --> 00:45:59,280
Speaker 4: Week hen be like real Fans. No, it's a reboot

934
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 4: and it's coming out in like May or June.

935
00:46:02,080 --> 00:46:04,680
Speaker 3: We don't have a release date, so trashy, but we

936
00:46:04,760 --> 00:46:06,960
Speaker 3: will have one and it's gonna be so good. We

937
00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:10,400
Speaker 3: have so many amazing guests lined up, so excited.

938
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:10,880
Speaker 1: I can't wait.

939
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 4: You guys listen to it and everyone should watch. Oh oh,

940
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:17,600
Speaker 4: that's my thirtieth birthday coming up. Oh so, I guess

941
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:20,719
Speaker 4: i'll promote that so fucked up, Like, I don't even

942
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:21,840
Speaker 4: know what to do about that.

943
00:46:22,120 --> 00:46:23,960
Speaker 3: But it's cool. I'm getting a lot of gray hairs.

944
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,959
Speaker 3: But I'm chill about it. I don't mind. I do mind.

945
00:46:27,520 --> 00:46:31,279
Speaker 4: It's awful, and what else can I promote. I'll talk

946
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:36,880
Speaker 4: about some of my favorites right now. I'm absolutely loving

947
00:46:37,760 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 4: the show Shows of Sunset.

948
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:40,960
Speaker 3: So show I'm bravo.

949
00:46:41,080 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 4: It's about Persian people in Los Angeles. I'm Persian, so

950
00:46:44,760 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 4: it kind of hits pretty close to home. By the way,

951
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,680
Speaker 4: Richard has just been counting on his fingers one to

952
00:46:48,760 --> 00:46:49,879
Speaker 4: seven this entire time.

953
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:54,080
Speaker 3: I have to calculate, and I've calculated. Okay, Yeah, I

954
00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:57,280
Speaker 3: was so deep in it. I heard bits and pieces

955
00:46:57,320 --> 00:46:59,520
Speaker 3: of what you were promoting, but I can't speak to

956
00:46:59,560 --> 00:47:02,960
Speaker 3: any of us. Actually, I have seen the pilot of

957
00:47:03,040 --> 00:47:07,040
Speaker 3: Chad and I think it's wonderful. Oh yeah, to watch that. Okay,

958
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:08,839
Speaker 3: So this is the rules of the game. I'm going

959
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,759
Speaker 3: to tell you three gift items or three items to

960
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:14,160
Speaker 3: give us gifts, and then three celebrities that you have

961
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:15,920
Speaker 3: to give them to, and then you have to tell

962
00:47:15,960 --> 00:47:18,440
Speaker 3: me who you're going to give what? Dan, why, I'm

963
00:47:18,480 --> 00:47:20,920
Speaker 3: more for this game? Oh of course. Okay. So the

964
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:24,680
Speaker 3: three gifts that you have been given are a nightgown,

965
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:30,240
Speaker 3: a bus pass, and the Da Vinci code on audiobook. Okay,

966
00:47:30,920 --> 00:47:33,440
Speaker 3: you have to give those two. Wait is it read

967
00:47:33,480 --> 00:47:37,520
Speaker 3: by Dan Brown? Yeah? I don't have any more details

968
00:47:37,560 --> 00:47:40,200
Speaker 3: for you, and let's assume it was read by Dan Brown.

969
00:47:41,040 --> 00:47:42,920
Speaker 3: You have to give You have the three people you

970
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:48,440
Speaker 3: need to give gifts to are Courtney Love? Oh, I mean,

971
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:51,040
Speaker 3: am I a this is like already so easy? And

972
00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:57,799
Speaker 3: Javier bardam oh okay, okay. So first thought is.

973
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:04,040
Speaker 4: First I would give the nightgown to Courtney Love. I

974
00:48:04,080 --> 00:48:07,200
Speaker 4: mean it feels almost too obvious. I mean, when she

975
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 4: was in a hole, she was famous.

976
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:10,680
Speaker 3: For wearing nightgowns. Is that true?

977
00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:12,920
Speaker 4: Yes, she would wear like that was her old thing,

978
00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:15,440
Speaker 4: like satin baby doll dresses that look like nightgowns.

979
00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:18,279
Speaker 3: You said, are you giving this? I guess it's.

980
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:20,320
Speaker 4: Almost like setting back to SATs when there's the obvious,

981
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:22,400
Speaker 4: like fake out thing that feels too obvious.

982
00:48:23,160 --> 00:48:27,400
Speaker 3: But I mean you have to give her. But but

983
00:48:28,520 --> 00:48:30,560
Speaker 3: I think I'm gonna do the unexpected thing, and I'm

984
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 3: not gonna do that, And I'm.

985
00:48:31,960 --> 00:48:35,040
Speaker 4: Going to give the nightgown to Javier Bardam Oh because

986
00:48:35,400 --> 00:48:39,360
Speaker 4: he is I mean, Hobby Abradem is, he's sexy.

987
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 3: I mean he makes Bob Iger. Oh, Bob Biger is

988
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:45,480
Speaker 3: a negative fifty in comparison to Javier Bardem.

989
00:48:45,719 --> 00:48:50,040
Speaker 4: Bobbyer is like a fucking pig compared to Javier Barden.

990
00:48:50,120 --> 00:48:51,920
Speaker 4: He's like, I'd rather fuck this microphone.

991
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 3: Bob Iger is the man that Javier Bardem plays in

992
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:57,120
Speaker 3: No Country for Old.

993
00:48:57,000 --> 00:49:02,600
Speaker 4: Man Damn Straight, which is like a more intense take

994
00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:03,319
Speaker 4: on It's pat.

995
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:07,000
Speaker 3: I feel that it totally gets Pat. But I would

996
00:49:07,000 --> 00:49:08,520
Speaker 3: even because you know, he's got a lady in his

997
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:10,799
Speaker 3: life and he can regift that to someone. Wait, who

998
00:49:10,880 --> 00:49:13,640
Speaker 3: is the lady? He's got to have someone? I feel

999
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:17,279
Speaker 3: like it's a famous person, jave Er Bardem, Penelope Cruz. No,

1000
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:19,400
Speaker 3: I don't know, is it Penelope Cruise or is it

1001
00:49:19,520 --> 00:49:25,000
Speaker 3: a I feel like Steven's gonna look like his figures

1002
00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 3: are flying so fast.

1003
00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:27,800
Speaker 4: Okay, so to give the nightcoun So just said we

1004
00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:30,160
Speaker 4: could gifted to a sexy lady, and maybe once I

1005
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:32,319
Speaker 4: give it to him, like I'll make the eyes at him,

1006
00:49:32,760 --> 00:49:33,960
Speaker 4: be like I know how.

1007
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:37,240
Speaker 3: To get a refund from Alaskan Airline, and it'd be like, oh, maybe.

1008
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:40,160
Speaker 4: I'll take up with this check and then I'm gonna

1009
00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:42,600
Speaker 4: give I'm gonna give the DaVinci code to Courtney Love.

1010
00:49:42,640 --> 00:49:47,399
Speaker 4: Because Courtney Love is so smart. She is like it's

1011
00:49:47,600 --> 00:49:51,319
Speaker 4: everyone knows that she's the smartest, most with it bitch. Ever, Yeah,

1012
00:49:51,360 --> 00:49:52,440
Speaker 4: she's a little wacky.

1013
00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:54,160
Speaker 3: But she has done so much.

1014
00:49:54,600 --> 00:49:57,480
Speaker 4: She would really appreciate a di Vinci code on audiobook

1015
00:49:57,520 --> 00:49:58,839
Speaker 4: on so many levels because she wuld was like kind

1016
00:49:58,840 --> 00:49:59,919
Speaker 4: of like an ironic, solely gift.

1017
00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:01,719
Speaker 3: But you would also probably like listen to it. Yeah,

1018
00:50:01,719 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 3: I feel like she hasn't listened to it yet, and

1019
00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:05,960
Speaker 3: it would be like a whole new experience for her totally.

1020
00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:09,040
Speaker 3: She'd be into it. She's thinking, this is going to

1021
00:50:09,080 --> 00:50:11,520
Speaker 3: topple the Catholic Church. Then she'd realize that this is

1022
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:14,080
Speaker 3: oh and she's all about that, and then she's into

1023
00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:17,200
Speaker 3: the movie series. Oh yeah, and she's a writer. She's

1024
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 3: a writer. She wrote all I mean, some people say, oh,

1025
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:21,960
Speaker 3: you know what, people say that Kurt wrote her music.

1026
00:50:22,080 --> 00:50:24,239
Speaker 3: Oh that's not true. Give me a break exactly. She

1027
00:50:24,320 --> 00:50:25,160
Speaker 3: wrote all that whole music.

1028
00:50:25,239 --> 00:50:27,600
Speaker 4: She knows good writing when she sees it, and she's

1029
00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:30,200
Speaker 4: all about Dan brown Ivins.

1030
00:50:30,280 --> 00:50:33,240
Speaker 3: Like that book, by the way, is so whack.

1031
00:50:33,960 --> 00:50:36,319
Speaker 4: It's just remember the end of Angels and Demons when

1032
00:50:36,640 --> 00:50:39,719
Speaker 4: if I'm I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure

1033
00:50:39,719 --> 00:50:42,080
Speaker 4: at the end of Angels and Demons, the Pope jumps

1034
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:42,920
Speaker 4: out of a helicopter.

1035
00:50:44,239 --> 00:50:46,440
Speaker 3: I'm not sure we should check on that can come

1036
00:50:46,520 --> 00:50:48,880
Speaker 3: in suicide or like extreme I.

1037
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:49,439
Speaker 1: Think he dies.

1038
00:50:49,480 --> 00:50:51,239
Speaker 4: But it's like this spectacular moment, and the book is

1039
00:50:51,239 --> 00:50:54,239
Speaker 4: at such a fervored, frenzied pace and like things are

1040
00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:57,200
Speaker 4: so insane, out of control. It's like Paul Bettany's like

1041
00:50:57,239 --> 00:50:59,920
Speaker 4: whipping himself and like everyone's running around like stealing paintings,

1042
00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:00,880
Speaker 4: like so fucked up.

1043
00:51:01,040 --> 00:51:02,400
Speaker 3: And then at the end it just like builds this.

1044
00:51:02,480 --> 00:51:05,719
Speaker 4: Unbelievable chriscendo in climax where I swear to God the

1045
00:51:05,840 --> 00:51:07,239
Speaker 4: Pope like jumps.

1046
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:08,520
Speaker 3: Out of a hook's funny helicopter.

1047
00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:10,120
Speaker 4: I s this.

1048
00:51:10,440 --> 00:51:11,319
Speaker 2: I the book.

1049
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:13,239
Speaker 4: I read the books when I was in middle school.

1050
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:15,319
Speaker 4: I don't know why, but because you were in middle school,

1051
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:17,200
Speaker 4: middle school and they're at a middle school level. By

1052
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:21,319
Speaker 4: the way, John always talks about brags about that Dan

1053
00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:23,160
Speaker 4: Brown went to exit he his high school and like

1054
00:51:23,239 --> 00:51:24,360
Speaker 4: has this like big house in.

1055
00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:27,040
Speaker 3: Their town whatever. Embarrassing. And then I was in a

1056
00:51:27,120 --> 00:51:29,480
Speaker 3: buzz bus past Tom. I mean, she's a bad one.

1057
00:51:29,560 --> 00:51:31,960
Speaker 3: She's a real one, Like she can she probably still

1058
00:51:32,040 --> 00:51:35,319
Speaker 3: rides the bus hell. Yeah, she is fucking she's she's

1059
00:51:35,360 --> 00:51:38,560
Speaker 3: a badass bitch. Yeah she's Uh. I feel like she's

1060
00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:40,480
Speaker 3: built her whole career on that. So have you seen

1061
00:51:40,480 --> 00:51:41,400
Speaker 3: the documentary?

1062
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:45,640
Speaker 4: No, it's so good. When was this dad was a

1063
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 4: Tamil freedom fighter, I think like Sri Lankan bitch. Of

1064
00:51:49,719 --> 00:51:53,319
Speaker 4: course she's a real dude. I mean when Diplo was hot.

1065
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:55,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true. But then there was that kind of

1066
00:51:55,920 --> 00:52:00,239
Speaker 3: that article that came out done the Tules address. But

1067
00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:03,719
Speaker 3: I feel like she's still the real thing. She also

1068
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:04,960
Speaker 3: has a Patreon. Did you see that?

1069
00:52:05,840 --> 00:52:09,120
Speaker 4: I started like a couple months ago or what I know.

1070
00:52:09,239 --> 00:52:11,400
Speaker 4: I'm like, you can't be actually famous and start a Patreon.

1071
00:52:11,800 --> 00:52:14,920
Speaker 3: No, that's absolutely not how that was chill. It's only

1072
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:17,200
Speaker 3: for like lame aspiring podcasters like myself.

1073
00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:21,400
Speaker 4: So what is she releasing on the Patreon photos of herself,

1074
00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:23,960
Speaker 4: like so she can like release new music and like

1075
00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:25,640
Speaker 4: live her life. I'm my bitches.

1076
00:52:25,719 --> 00:52:27,320
Speaker 3: Is like she performed at the super Bowl. I'm not

1077
00:52:27,480 --> 00:52:30,320
Speaker 3: donating to your goddamn Patreon you did, Yeah, she was

1078
00:52:30,360 --> 00:52:33,520
Speaker 3: on that unfortunate Madonna song. Oh yeah, l Evy Madonna.

1079
00:52:33,680 --> 00:52:35,080
Speaker 3: That was rough. I will say, I go back and

1080
00:52:35,160 --> 00:52:38,359
Speaker 3: listen to it, and I think time has done that song. Well,

1081
00:52:38,960 --> 00:52:41,439
Speaker 3: I mean, I agree with you on a lot of things,

1082
00:52:41,480 --> 00:52:44,560
Speaker 3: but basically Madonna in the last fifteen years is just

1083
00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:47,919
Speaker 3: gnarly for you, really a rough rough go what about

1084
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:49,760
Speaker 3: come pushions from the dance floor? Is that over fifteen?

1085
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:55,200
Speaker 3: Well that's uh five oh six? Okay, okay, so like

1086
00:52:55,320 --> 00:52:58,040
Speaker 3: but after that, Madonna took up just drove straight off

1087
00:52:58,080 --> 00:52:58,440
Speaker 3: a cliff.

1088
00:52:58,680 --> 00:53:02,520
Speaker 4: Yeah it's not she lives in Lisbon though, Okay, Well

1089
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:06,240
Speaker 4: I love that choice, sure, but it's not doing anything

1090
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:06,880
Speaker 4: for her music.

1091
00:53:07,040 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 3: Elliv Madonna, el you V Madonna. Son sucks, you know,

1092
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:15,439
Speaker 3: Sophie like the cool trans like, oh yeah, of course

1093
00:53:15,800 --> 00:53:18,400
Speaker 3: Sophie produced that song. I think you're kidding. No, Sophie

1094
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:22,160
Speaker 3: produced a lot. Sophie thinking Sophie's so Sophie can make mistakes.

1095
00:53:22,239 --> 00:53:24,719
Speaker 3: That's what I've just learned. Yeah, I'm a big fan.

1096
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:26,800
Speaker 3: But Sophie, I'm telling you go back and listen to

1097
00:53:26,880 --> 00:53:29,400
Speaker 3: that now, knowing that Sophie produced it, it might be

1098
00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:32,080
Speaker 3: worth my time. Okay, well, I think you did a

1099
00:53:32,120 --> 00:53:34,640
Speaker 3: pretty good job there. It was kind of hard, like

1100
00:53:34,680 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 3: I overthought it a little bit, but I think no,

1101
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:39,320
Speaker 3: I think I mean the move not to give Courtney.

1102
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:42,000
Speaker 3: I feel like Courtney Love definitely does have enough nightgowns.

1103
00:53:42,719 --> 00:53:45,920
Speaker 3: She doesn't need to open a box to another nightgown.

1104
00:53:46,040 --> 00:53:49,960
Speaker 3: She'd break down. She's like, this is this is like

1105
00:53:50,040 --> 00:53:52,560
Speaker 3: the last thing I needed. I don't know me at all. Yeah. No,

1106
00:53:52,960 --> 00:53:56,440
Speaker 3: final segment of the podcast, I said, no questions. We're

1107
00:53:56,480 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 3: going to help somebody pick a gift for somebody else

1108
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:01,080
Speaker 3: in their life. Oh my gosh. Writing into I said,

1109
00:54:01,160 --> 00:54:06,400
Speaker 3: no gifts at gmail dot com. Here's the question, Dear Bridger.

1110
00:54:06,560 --> 00:54:09,279
Speaker 3: My mom's sixty first birthday is coming up, and I'm

1111
00:54:09,320 --> 00:54:11,240
Speaker 3: worried because we got her a lot of great gifts

1112
00:54:11,280 --> 00:54:13,880
Speaker 3: for her sixtieth and I don't want this birthday to

1113
00:54:13,960 --> 00:54:16,480
Speaker 3: pay in comparison, but also don't want to spend the

1114
00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:18,840
Speaker 3: same amount of money as the last year. She's a

1115
00:54:18,880 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 3: great lady who's been traveling a lot, loves to walk,

1116
00:54:21,719 --> 00:54:26,000
Speaker 3: watch TV, the Red Sox, and warm weather. Any suggestions, thanks,

1117
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:29,359
Speaker 3: Jen in Los Angeles, I have like a thousand suggestions. Well,

1118
00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:32,879
Speaker 3: she's come to the right place, Jen, Yeah, Jen, Jen

1119
00:54:32,960 --> 00:54:36,600
Speaker 3: in Los Angeles. Mommy's turning sixty one and she's got

1120
00:54:37,040 --> 00:54:38,600
Speaker 3: we got some good details here. The only thing I

1121
00:54:38,600 --> 00:54:40,680
Speaker 3: would have liked to hear is how would she spent

1122
00:54:40,880 --> 00:54:41,319
Speaker 3: last year?

1123
00:54:41,840 --> 00:54:42,040
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1124
00:54:42,600 --> 00:54:45,160
Speaker 3: What do you do for this media? You could have

1125
00:54:45,200 --> 00:54:48,200
Speaker 3: spent fifty thousand dollars and I'd like a cap. Would

1126
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:52,239
Speaker 3: you buy her Dodge charger? Yeah? Be cleary, thank you.

1127
00:54:53,080 --> 00:54:55,719
Speaker 3: I hope she bought her a Dodge charger, Like, Mom,

1128
00:54:55,800 --> 00:54:59,600
Speaker 3: here you go the cop car. I mean, so, I

1129
00:54:59,640 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 3: guess let's just assume between like one hundred and two

1130
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:06,439
Speaker 3: hundred dollars and that feels about right. That's a lot

1131
00:55:06,600 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 3: to you. No, that's like that's like a normal birthday pressent. Yeah,

1132
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:12,320
Speaker 3: for sixtieth I'm sure they got her like something like

1133
00:55:12,400 --> 00:55:14,719
Speaker 3: that was like three hundred dollars. Oh yeah, certainly. Well

1134
00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:16,400
Speaker 3: I think they got her a Dodge charger. They got

1135
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:19,000
Speaker 3: her DODG charger. So let's assume last year they spent

1136
00:55:19,080 --> 00:55:22,120
Speaker 3: fifty thousand dollars, so something under fifty thousand dollars this year.

1137
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,440
Speaker 4: Okay, she likes walking in warm weather. Here's two suggestions

1138
00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:26,560
Speaker 4: right off the top of my mind. I need to

1139
00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:28,720
Speaker 4: think about this one. Walking sticks again.

1140
00:55:28,800 --> 00:55:29,480
Speaker 3: Hiking sticks.

1141
00:55:29,640 --> 00:55:33,680
Speaker 4: Everyone needs those, especially older ladies. Your bones are brittle,

1142
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:36,359
Speaker 4: they're falling apart. I'm gonna keep it real. Walking is hard,

1143
00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:38,880
Speaker 4: you'd be slipping. What do you like?

1144
00:55:39,040 --> 00:55:41,719
Speaker 3: Is there like a walking stick that doesn't look No,

1145
00:55:41,800 --> 00:55:43,799
Speaker 3: it's like those two. When you have the two as like, oh,

1146
00:55:43,960 --> 00:55:46,360
Speaker 3: they're almost like yeah, like ski poles. They're so helpful

1147
00:55:46,600 --> 00:55:50,879
Speaker 3: when there's any rough terrain, any incline right, very hard.

1148
00:55:50,920 --> 00:55:53,960
Speaker 3: I confuse those. They're really helpful. Okay. I highly recommend

1149
00:55:54,360 --> 00:55:56,799
Speaker 3: you adjust the length. John taught me this. When you're

1150
00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:59,360
Speaker 3: going uphill shorter, when you're going downhill, you make them longer.

1151
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:02,640
Speaker 3: Makes sense. It's really nice. Do you have your own pair?

1152
00:56:02,920 --> 00:56:03,080
Speaker 4: Oh?

1153
00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:06,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean well I have the I have the

1154
00:56:06,440 --> 00:56:08,920
Speaker 3: stability of a sixty one year old wo man. The

1155
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:12,840
Speaker 3: general just kind of tottering around. You're like, oh, always

1156
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:15,840
Speaker 3: doing that. Okay, So you came in hot with what

1157
00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:19,239
Speaker 3: a nice big oh cover up from the sun. I mean,

1158
00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:20,920
Speaker 3: I'm sure she's a nicety one year old woman. She

1159
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:22,799
Speaker 3: has a nice hat, but like, but why not get

1160
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:23,319
Speaker 3: our new one?

1161
00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 4: If she's a woman who likes to do her hair

1162
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:26,319
Speaker 4: and a pody tillerr bun, you could do a nice

1163
00:56:26,480 --> 00:56:30,120
Speaker 4: visor or open open top, or if she likes to

1164
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:32,200
Speaker 4: maybe she has short hair, you can get one of

1165
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:33,799
Speaker 4: those hats with like the.

1166
00:56:33,840 --> 00:56:37,640
Speaker 3: Flap on the back. I don't know, I'm going to

1167
00:56:37,680 --> 00:56:41,960
Speaker 3: say no to that. Yeah, exactly. Everyone that wears one

1168
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:43,919
Speaker 3: of those, I'm always a little bit thrown. I guess

1169
00:56:43,920 --> 00:56:45,640
Speaker 3: if you were, I think a woman could get away

1170
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:47,239
Speaker 3: with it a little bit more than a man. But

1171
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,000
Speaker 3: a man in one of those, I'm just wondering, what

1172
00:56:49,120 --> 00:56:50,080
Speaker 3: does his neck look like?

1173
00:56:51,440 --> 00:56:51,680
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1174
00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:54,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't want to be surprised by your deck. No,

1175
00:56:55,320 --> 00:56:57,360
Speaker 3: I need that exposed at all times. And is it

1176
00:56:57,440 --> 00:56:59,120
Speaker 3: what is it? Is it like the neck itself or

1177
00:56:59,160 --> 00:57:01,720
Speaker 3: is it like the hair? I think it could be either,

1178
00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:07,120
Speaker 3: ye mean, but the flap indicates to me there's something

1179
00:57:07,239 --> 00:57:10,120
Speaker 3: scary going on with your neck, hiding something, and you're

1180
00:57:10,160 --> 00:57:12,239
Speaker 3: gonna take that off while I'm trying to eat at

1181
00:57:12,239 --> 00:57:15,839
Speaker 3: a restaurant and it's going to be reptilian, or if

1182
00:57:15,880 --> 00:57:17,840
Speaker 3: you take it off at dent't Iphon, I'm complaining. Oh

1183
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:20,680
Speaker 3: but if you're wearing it in dent't Iphoon, I'm complaining.

1184
00:57:20,720 --> 00:57:23,720
Speaker 3: So don't come into don't go to dent Typhong. If

1185
00:57:23,760 --> 00:57:26,720
Speaker 3: you do got this issue, you do, Okay? What about

1186
00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:31,480
Speaker 3: even like a glasses chain? Oh, glass chain for her readers?

1187
00:57:31,800 --> 00:57:33,919
Speaker 3: I like a Red Sox branded one. But that would

1188
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:36,520
Speaker 3: be really nice. So if she likes this, yeah, of course,

1189
00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:40,400
Speaker 3: and she could uh like read while in between? Is

1190
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:42,439
Speaker 3: there a period during a baseball game that you could

1191
00:57:42,440 --> 00:57:43,280
Speaker 3: read I don't know.

1192
00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:45,160
Speaker 4: The seventh inning stretch off the top of my eads

1193
00:57:45,920 --> 00:57:49,240
Speaker 4: for your geese, A fancy podcast?

1194
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:50,200
Speaker 3: You want to know these things?

1195
00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:50,760
Speaker 4: No?

1196
00:57:51,320 --> 00:57:56,480
Speaker 3: Absolutely not? Or even like what about a nice yetti?

1197
00:57:56,680 --> 00:57:59,560
Speaker 3: I love my yetti? Wait, I don't know what it's like,

1198
00:57:59,600 --> 00:58:03,120
Speaker 3: A kind of thermos for your coffee cold. I love

1199
00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:05,760
Speaker 3: my ye That's a great thing. If mom's out of

1200
00:58:05,800 --> 00:58:07,240
Speaker 3: the house all the time, she might want something to

1201
00:58:07,320 --> 00:58:09,560
Speaker 3: keep her drink at the right temperature. I get my

1202
00:58:09,640 --> 00:58:11,360
Speaker 3: yetti ready in the morning, and it's sitting in my

1203
00:58:11,440 --> 00:58:12,640
Speaker 3: car as I do my errands and.

1204
00:58:12,640 --> 00:58:15,760
Speaker 4: I'm always come back to a hot drink, right anyway,

1205
00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:17,480
Speaker 4: those are like kind of boring gifts, but like, I know, I.

1206
00:58:17,520 --> 00:58:20,800
Speaker 3: Also feel right for like I mean, there's so much

1207
00:58:20,840 --> 00:58:24,160
Speaker 3: pressure after the sixtieth bring it down much. And also

1208
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:27,000
Speaker 3: but like if mom has a problem, you know, she's

1209
00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:29,200
Speaker 3: got to understand that every decade you're going to get

1210
00:58:29,200 --> 00:58:30,800
Speaker 3: a big gift. Next year, it's not going to be

1211
00:58:30,840 --> 00:58:34,200
Speaker 3: a very big deal, I know. Otherwise, what have you learned?

1212
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:38,640
Speaker 3: I know sixty years and appreciate the big birthdays? Yeah,

1213
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:41,880
Speaker 3: if every birthday's big, exactly and it's going to get

1214
00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:45,560
Speaker 3: out of control after a Dutch charger, what comes next?

1215
00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:47,440
Speaker 3: We should just kick your mom in the stomach as

1216
00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:50,560
Speaker 3: hard as you can, just attack her, just you know,

1217
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:54,240
Speaker 3: like just the next year you've lowered the bar so low.

1218
00:58:54,360 --> 00:58:56,280
Speaker 3: The next year she'll be You can get her older

1219
00:58:56,320 --> 00:58:58,800
Speaker 3: with like a Starbucks gift card or something, or like

1220
00:58:58,800 --> 00:58:59,600
Speaker 3: an old newspaper.

1221
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:02,400
Speaker 4: What is a really good gift for a sixty one

1222
00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:04,480
Speaker 4: year old woman? I'm taking this like seriously, I'm not

1223
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:08,360
Speaker 4: doing jokes. A subscription to a magazine I love, I've

1224
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:13,240
Speaker 4: just sheep they are so cheap. Two dollars five dollars.

1225
00:59:13,280 --> 00:59:15,440
Speaker 4: I subscribed like four magazines a couple of weeks ago,

1226
00:59:15,480 --> 00:59:16,240
Speaker 4: because it was five.

1227
00:59:16,120 --> 00:59:18,760
Speaker 3: Dollars for a year. It's what are you subscribing to?

1228
00:59:19,480 --> 00:59:24,320
Speaker 3: Let's say I got New Yorker, Oh wow, National Geographic, Wow,

1229
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:29,400
Speaker 3: Martha Stewart, Wow, I need to do that. Magazine subscriptions.

1230
00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:31,080
Speaker 3: I'm glad you bring that up. That's a really good gift.

1231
00:59:31,200 --> 00:59:33,600
Speaker 3: That's an incredible any I mean, any subscription is a

1232
00:59:33,640 --> 00:59:35,520
Speaker 3: great gift, I think because then the person gets it

1233
00:59:35,600 --> 00:59:37,240
Speaker 3: for I got, you know, my sister gummy socks for

1234
00:59:37,280 --> 00:59:39,280
Speaker 3: a year of this sort of thing. But a magazine

1235
00:59:39,360 --> 00:59:42,120
Speaker 3: it's the same. It's doing the same thing, and you're

1236
00:59:42,200 --> 00:59:46,960
Speaker 3: supporting the publishing industry. Let's keep printing business. I mean, ClOH,

1237
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:49,439
Speaker 3: is there a better? Is there anything else you could

1238
00:59:49,440 --> 00:59:51,720
Speaker 3: have said? I mean, that is it right there? I

1239
00:59:51,920 --> 00:59:55,520
Speaker 3: love Amaze. You can fly them around the house and

1240
00:59:55,600 --> 00:59:57,400
Speaker 3: you can just kind of casually read in every room.

1241
00:59:57,480 --> 01:00:00,240
Speaker 3: I keep it in my purse, on my phone. I'm

1242
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:03,080
Speaker 3: in line at night, I curl up in bed, I've

1243
01:00:03,200 --> 01:00:07,160
Speaker 3: got my little story to read. And cold magazine ie

1244
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:09,920
Speaker 3: just absolutely cutting into my hands.

1245
01:00:09,920 --> 01:00:10,840
Speaker 1: It's so cold.

1246
01:00:11,520 --> 01:00:14,480
Speaker 3: No, I love magazine. Someone you love at magazine subscription

1247
01:00:14,680 --> 01:00:17,160
Speaker 3: and that goes for anyone, any age, any gender. Totally.

1248
01:00:17,200 --> 01:00:19,760
Speaker 4: They are truly five or ten dollars. Absolutely, I think

1249
01:00:19,880 --> 01:00:21,680
Speaker 4: you're getting five dollars magazine.

1250
01:00:21,280 --> 01:00:24,200
Speaker 3: And no, yeah, most people. I think people assume magazines

1251
01:00:24,240 --> 01:00:27,160
Speaker 3: are fifty dollars a year. They're really very publishing industry

1252
01:00:27,240 --> 01:00:30,640
Speaker 3: is literally dying. So take advantage of this ailing industry

1253
01:00:30,840 --> 01:00:34,120
Speaker 3: and getting beautiful gift for a loved one. Great gift, Caroline.

1254
01:00:34,600 --> 01:00:36,840
Speaker 3: Oh my god, Bridger, I'm so happy you were able

1255
01:00:36,920 --> 01:00:40,640
Speaker 3: to come. This gift is beautiful. I'm it's such a

1256
01:00:40,760 --> 01:00:42,840
Speaker 3: high pressure thing. I'm going to have to figure out

1257
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:45,080
Speaker 3: where to put these, but I don't I want to

1258
01:00:45,120 --> 01:00:48,560
Speaker 3: put each of these in a special place. Oh I didn't.

1259
01:00:49,320 --> 01:00:51,600
Speaker 3: It was so hard to pick a Little Kim sticker.

1260
01:00:51,760 --> 01:00:55,800
Speaker 3: Oh I love Little Kim. I don't know. I think

1261
01:00:56,160 --> 01:01:01,080
Speaker 3: Mariah has a more focused look and a more polished

1262
01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:04,160
Speaker 3: image than Little Kim is kind of all over the place.

1263
01:01:04,360 --> 01:01:07,040
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, oh yeah thing, And I mean you're all

1264
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:09,800
Speaker 4: about a polished image, ye, of course, and Mariah's done

1265
01:01:09,840 --> 01:01:10,640
Speaker 4: it anyway.

1266
01:01:11,360 --> 01:01:13,160
Speaker 3: I'm so happy you like the gift. Yeah, thank you

1267
01:01:13,360 --> 01:01:15,480
Speaker 3: so much for being here. You were a delight, thank

1268
01:01:15,520 --> 01:01:18,439
Speaker 3: you were happy, and that's the end of the show.

1269
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:20,840
Speaker 3: So I'm just going to tell everyone to have a

1270
01:01:20,880 --> 01:01:24,760
Speaker 3: wonderful time goodbye. I said no Gifts isn't exactly right production.

1271
01:01:25,080 --> 01:01:28,720
Speaker 3: It's engineered by Earth Angel Stephen Ray Morris. The theme

1272
01:01:28,840 --> 01:01:31,960
Speaker 3: song is by Miracle Worker Amy Mann. You can follow

1273
01:01:32,040 --> 01:01:35,080
Speaker 3: the show on Instagram and Twitter at I said no Gifts,

1274
01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:38,400
Speaker 3: and if you have a question or need help getting

1275
01:01:38,400 --> 01:01:41,000
Speaker 3: a gift for someone in your life, email me at

1276
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:44,320
Speaker 3: I said no Gifts at gmail dot com. Listen and

1277
01:01:44,440 --> 01:01:48,200
Speaker 3: subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you found me.

1278
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:50,520
Speaker 3: And why not leave a review while you're at it?

1279
01:01:52,680 --> 01:01:59,600
Speaker 1: Hell, did you hear fun a man myself perfectly clear?

1280
01:02:00,040 --> 01:02:00,440
Speaker 2: M hm.

1281
01:02:00,960 --> 01:02:06,040
Speaker 1: But you're a guess to my home. You gotta come

1282
01:02:06,160 --> 01:02:07,960
Speaker 1: to me empty, And.

1283
01:02:09,480 --> 01:02:14,120
Speaker 2: I said, no, guest, your own presences presents enough.

1284
01:02:15,240 --> 01:02:19,840
Speaker 1: I already had too much stuff, So how do you

1285
01:02:20,160 --> 01:02:22,200
Speaker 1: dare to surbey me?