1 00:00:04,795 --> 00:00:22,195 Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio Greetings 2 00:00:22,315 --> 00:00:28,035 Speaker 1: from Weimar, America, where Dictator on day one Trump continues 3 00:00:28,075 --> 00:00:31,155 Speaker 1: to measure the windows for the new curtains in his 4 00:00:31,355 --> 00:00:34,675 Speaker 1: vices howls. And I don't know if that has been 5 00:00:34,715 --> 00:00:38,115 Speaker 1: processed on the fascist side of this equation, or if 6 00:00:38,155 --> 00:00:42,515 Speaker 1: we have properly done so on the non dictator on 7 00:00:42,635 --> 00:00:46,235 Speaker 1: day one side, but it is increasingly obvious that Trump 8 00:00:46,675 --> 00:00:51,075 Speaker 1: is increasingly confident that he will seize power next year 9 00:00:51,715 --> 00:00:56,155 Speaker 1: and getting increasingly sloppy about what he tells us about 10 00:00:56,155 --> 00:00:59,315 Speaker 1: that time. That is the only possible explanation for what 11 00:00:59,395 --> 00:01:02,795 Speaker 1: he has now done, leaking to the gullible and willing 12 00:01:02,835 --> 00:01:05,875 Speaker 1: stenographers from Axios Mike and Jim Vanda High for a 13 00:01:05,915 --> 00:01:09,995 Speaker 1: publication yesterday a set of choices for his administration that 14 00:01:10,075 --> 00:01:18,395 Speaker 1: would make Jayre Bolsonaro blush, Vice President Tucker Carlson, Chief 15 00:01:18,475 --> 00:01:23,835 Speaker 1: of Staff Steve Bannon, CIA Director Cash Patel, Attorney General 16 00:01:23,875 --> 00:01:27,235 Speaker 1: Stephen Miller or Attorney General Mike Davis or Attorney General 17 00:01:27,315 --> 00:01:31,995 Speaker 1: j d Vance, Secretary of Defense Tom Cotton, Secretary of 18 00:01:32,115 --> 00:01:36,395 Speaker 1: Denial Carry Lake, Secretaries of to be announced Leader Christy 19 00:01:36,515 --> 00:01:41,035 Speaker 1: Nome Byron Donald's Johnny mcintee and of course Secretary of 20 00:01:41,195 --> 00:01:46,515 Speaker 1: Lecturn's Sarah Huckabee. I mean, it begins to sound like 21 00:01:46,595 --> 00:01:50,675 Speaker 1: the leaders of the Republican Party of Springfield during the 22 00:01:50,715 --> 00:01:55,955 Speaker 1: Simpsons meeting in their underground layer Dracula Sideshow, Bob carry Lake, 23 00:01:56,075 --> 00:01:59,035 Speaker 1: Tom Cotton, Mister Burns, Fat Tony, and of course George H. W. 24 00:01:59,195 --> 00:02:01,155 Speaker 2: Bush. 25 00:02:01,195 --> 00:02:07,035 Speaker 1: Sadly, the Trump plan and this leak to Axios only 26 00:02:07,195 --> 00:02:11,675 Speaker 1: sounds like comedy. Not only is Trump suddenly so emboldened 27 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:14,395 Speaker 1: that he's thrown out names that absolutely no normal person 28 00:02:14,595 --> 00:02:18,395 Speaker 1: could permit to serve anything but hot dogs from a 29 00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:23,115 Speaker 1: street cart, to name people whose appointments could be stopped 30 00:02:23,595 --> 00:02:26,475 Speaker 1: or thwarted at least by a Democratic Senate, thus energizing 31 00:02:26,515 --> 00:02:29,515 Speaker 1: campaign efforts for that to name a bunch of thugs, 32 00:02:30,115 --> 00:02:32,195 Speaker 1: and moreover, a lot of people who have lost a 33 00:02:32,195 --> 00:02:37,235 Speaker 1: lot of races. But it can't be coincidence that several 34 00:02:37,315 --> 00:02:40,355 Speaker 1: people on that list have also just done things that 35 00:02:40,515 --> 00:02:43,835 Speaker 1: must have felt real good to them, but which knocked 36 00:02:43,875 --> 00:02:48,675 Speaker 1: down basically to zero their chances of recovering from whatever 37 00:02:48,755 --> 00:02:52,915 Speaker 1: the f is wrong with them. I mean Tucker Carlson, 38 00:02:53,555 --> 00:02:58,075 Speaker 1: who has in just the last eighteen years charmed and 39 00:02:58,195 --> 00:03:01,475 Speaker 1: been hired by and then within at the most six 40 00:03:01,595 --> 00:03:06,235 Speaker 1: years fired by escorted from the bill by all three 41 00:03:06,395 --> 00:03:10,915 Speaker 1: cable news networks plus PBS. Tucker Carlson went on Twitter 42 00:03:10,955 --> 00:03:14,115 Speaker 1: last night with Alex Jones and embraced nine to eleven 43 00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:17,915 Speaker 1: Trutherism as I played you on Wednesday, Bannon and Patel 44 00:03:18,035 --> 00:03:22,715 Speaker 1: went on and insisted they will jail whoever they please, reporters, Democrats, 45 00:03:22,795 --> 00:03:25,035 Speaker 1: whoever they don't like. And in case you thought they 46 00:03:25,035 --> 00:03:28,115 Speaker 1: weren't serious, they said again, We're serious. And then they 47 00:03:28,155 --> 00:03:30,235 Speaker 1: threatened to put Joe Scarborough in jail, which is, to 48 00:03:30,235 --> 00:03:33,195 Speaker 1: be fair, not where I would start, except maybe on 49 00:03:33,235 --> 00:03:37,595 Speaker 1: a personal level. And Vance, who has done literally nothing 50 00:03:37,635 --> 00:03:40,155 Speaker 1: since being elected to the Senate except add a few 51 00:03:40,275 --> 00:03:45,115 Speaker 1: chins to his collection, is not waiting until Trump drags 52 00:03:45,195 --> 00:03:50,675 Speaker 1: off what he last night called maggot Haggerman. He is 53 00:03:50,755 --> 00:03:55,835 Speaker 1: a master of satire, isn't he. Vance read a Washington 54 00:03:55,875 --> 00:03:59,075 Speaker 1: Post column, well had it read to him, in which 55 00:03:59,115 --> 00:04:01,475 Speaker 1: an editor at large named Robert Kagan said if Trump 56 00:04:01,515 --> 00:04:04,355 Speaker 1: wins next year, that the best response from free America 57 00:04:04,355 --> 00:04:07,795 Speaker 1: would quote come from the governors of predominantly democratic states 58 00:04:07,835 --> 00:04:10,915 Speaker 1: such as California and New York through a form of nullification. 59 00:04:11,435 --> 00:04:14,715 Speaker 1: States with democratic governors and state houses could refuse to 60 00:04:14,795 --> 00:04:19,115 Speaker 1: recognize the authority of a tyrannical government. That is always 61 00:04:19,155 --> 00:04:23,995 Speaker 1: an option in our federal system. Vance, who you need 62 00:04:23,995 --> 00:04:29,075 Speaker 1: to remind yourself, may be completely inert, but is still 63 00:04:29,235 --> 00:04:32,555 Speaker 1: in the Senate, then leaked to Fox that he has 64 00:04:32,595 --> 00:04:35,635 Speaker 1: written to the Attorney General and the Secretary of State 65 00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:39,635 Speaker 1: demanding to know by January sixth when the DOJ will 66 00:04:39,675 --> 00:04:44,275 Speaker 1: investigate this. Kagan of the Post for quote potential violations 67 00:04:44,315 --> 00:04:47,835 Speaker 1: of laws that prohibit quote open rebellion against the United States, 68 00:04:47,955 --> 00:04:52,475 Speaker 1: along with the political violence that would inevitably follow. Matt's 69 00:04:52,515 --> 00:04:55,715 Speaker 1: of course, is an idiot, a performative idiot who's not 70 00:04:55,795 --> 00:05:00,675 Speaker 1: that good at performing. Who reminds me of me. Me 71 00:05:01,195 --> 00:05:03,915 Speaker 1: in nineteen seventy nine in a once a week government 72 00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:06,675 Speaker 1: class in in which we all played roles in a 73 00:05:06,715 --> 00:05:09,635 Speaker 1: fictional community, and obviously I wanted to be the journalists, 74 00:05:09,675 --> 00:05:13,995 Speaker 1: so they assigned me counselman. I didn't want to be counselman. 75 00:05:14,115 --> 00:05:16,595 Speaker 1: I was too lazy to do anything. So I realized 76 00:05:16,635 --> 00:05:19,275 Speaker 1: quickly that I could manipulate the journalists in the class. 77 00:05:19,395 --> 00:05:22,835 Speaker 1: By sticking to this rule, whatever happens, issue a press 78 00:05:22,875 --> 00:05:26,955 Speaker 1: release claiming credit for it or blaming somebody else for it. 79 00:05:27,755 --> 00:05:31,515 Speaker 1: I got an a Vance is going a little further. 80 00:05:31,755 --> 00:05:34,835 Speaker 1: He included the Secretary of State in this hysterical pearl 81 00:05:34,875 --> 00:05:39,115 Speaker 1: clutching Cornell Government four oh one press release because the 82 00:05:39,115 --> 00:05:42,435 Speaker 1: op ed's author is married to Under Secretary of State 83 00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:46,555 Speaker 1: for Political Affairs, Victoria Newland. So Vance wants her security 84 00:05:46,635 --> 00:05:50,235 Speaker 1: clearance reviewed. Quote in light of her husband's call for 85 00:05:50,315 --> 00:05:55,755 Speaker 1: rebellion against the United States. Again, Vance is a moron. 86 00:05:56,515 --> 00:06:00,555 Speaker 1: He looks like a constipated moron. He is advocating punishing 87 00:06:00,635 --> 00:06:06,475 Speaker 1: writers for writing. He is a writer. But I've got 88 00:06:06,475 --> 00:06:09,755 Speaker 1: two cheat codes for him on this, JD. If you 89 00:06:09,915 --> 00:06:15,555 Speaker 1: really want to push this. Victoria Newland's sister used to 90 00:06:15,595 --> 00:06:19,075 Speaker 1: have the seats in the front row at Yankee Stadium 91 00:06:19,555 --> 00:06:23,795 Speaker 1: next to mine, and so I used to go to 92 00:06:23,835 --> 00:06:27,315 Speaker 1: her with some of the games and share the tickets. 93 00:06:27,355 --> 00:06:29,115 Speaker 1: And I sat next to her a couple of times. 94 00:06:30,395 --> 00:06:34,835 Speaker 1: And she once ran a restaurant in town where me 95 00:06:34,955 --> 00:06:38,035 Speaker 1: and my then girlfriend, who is now a prominent political 96 00:06:38,115 --> 00:06:40,315 Speaker 1: magazine writer, we dined. 97 00:06:40,915 --> 00:06:46,435 Speaker 2: She brought us breadsticks. JD. It's all part of the conspiracy. 98 00:06:47,995 --> 00:06:58,315 Speaker 2: Gotta be a conspiracy there, mister Check's notes, Secretary of Lumber. Also, 99 00:06:58,355 --> 00:07:01,355 Speaker 2: the op ed itself misses a much juicier solution to 100 00:07:01,355 --> 00:07:07,315 Speaker 2: a Trump restoration Blue States nullifying great Blue States, stopping 101 00:07:07,555 --> 00:07:11,955 Speaker 2: the sending of our tax money to the federal fascist government. 102 00:07:12,955 --> 00:07:15,875 Speaker 2: Three weeks of that, no money coming in from the 103 00:07:15,875 --> 00:07:19,275 Speaker 2: Blue States, and Trump would have to sell his blood 104 00:07:19,835 --> 00:07:23,635 Speaker 2: to Octapharma Plasma in Tacoma Park, Maryland, just to meet 105 00:07:23,675 --> 00:07:29,035 Speaker 2: White House payroll. Back to the point, we will never 106 00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:32,595 Speaker 2: fully know, not even after the autopsy, what precisely is 107 00:07:32,755 --> 00:07:36,075 Speaker 2: wrong with Trump's brain, but it seems clear that whatever 108 00:07:36,115 --> 00:07:38,555 Speaker 2: it is, one of the symptoms is that he must 109 00:07:38,635 --> 00:07:43,275 Speaker 2: convince himself that he is winning, that he will win, 110 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:48,795 Speaker 2: that he will always win. Jack Smith is right, Trump 111 00:07:48,915 --> 00:07:52,155 Speaker 2: is a serial election denier. But it's deeper than that. 112 00:07:52,795 --> 00:07:56,355 Speaker 2: At his advanced age and with his advanced diseases, if 113 00:07:56,395 --> 00:08:00,915 Speaker 2: he ever believed he was defeated, he would die, maybe 114 00:08:00,955 --> 00:08:05,315 Speaker 2: not literally, but certainly figuratively. So the greatest relief he 115 00:08:05,315 --> 00:08:08,955 Speaker 2: could possibly have in life would be to firmly believe 116 00:08:09,515 --> 00:08:12,395 Speaker 2: three hundred and thirty four days before it happens that 117 00:08:12,475 --> 00:08:16,675 Speaker 2: he has already won the twenty twenty four election, and 118 00:08:16,755 --> 00:08:19,755 Speaker 2: that is how he is behaving that. I'm not sure 119 00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:22,875 Speaker 2: what to do with that, but it has to make 120 00:08:22,955 --> 00:08:26,075 Speaker 2: him sloppy and vulnerable, and better minds than yours and 121 00:08:26,155 --> 00:08:30,475 Speaker 2: mind can figure out which soft spot on his head 122 00:08:30,715 --> 00:08:36,395 Speaker 2: to push first. It continues in court. Trump invented the 123 00:08:36,435 --> 00:08:42,235 Speaker 2: nonsensical presidential immunity, then demanded Judge Chutkin dismiss the subversion 124 00:08:42,275 --> 00:08:44,995 Speaker 2: case because of it. She ruled against him. He not 125 00:08:45,115 --> 00:08:47,515 Speaker 2: only appealed, but last night had his lawyer's right that 126 00:08:47,715 --> 00:08:50,995 Speaker 2: while he appeals, she has to suspend everything in the 127 00:08:51,075 --> 00:08:54,675 Speaker 2: case quote. All current deadlines must be held in abeyance 128 00:08:54,915 --> 00:08:59,555 Speaker 2: until at minimum this motion is resolved. President Trump will 129 00:08:59,595 --> 00:09:02,595 Speaker 2: proceed based on that understanding and the authorities set forth 130 00:09:02,635 --> 00:09:07,395 Speaker 2: here in absent further order at the court's stall. It's strategic. 131 00:09:08,035 --> 00:09:10,875 Speaker 2: It could push even the Smith DC trial past the 132 00:09:10,915 --> 00:09:15,875 Speaker 2: election if it works. But it's with the extra unnecessary 133 00:09:15,955 --> 00:09:19,555 Speaker 2: dollops of arrogance they are writing. He will ignore the 134 00:09:19,675 --> 00:09:23,075 Speaker 2: judge unless the George orders him not to ignore her, 135 00:09:23,395 --> 00:09:29,715 Speaker 2: at which point he will ignore her order. It's stupid 136 00:09:29,755 --> 00:09:33,755 Speaker 2: and bitchy. It's like saying, I only want to be 137 00:09:33,795 --> 00:09:36,915 Speaker 2: called President Trump ever again. So I'm changing my first 138 00:09:37,035 --> 00:09:41,995 Speaker 2: name to president. So then if I win, you have 139 00:09:42,035 --> 00:09:46,475 Speaker 2: to call me president President Trump. His lines up with 140 00:09:46,515 --> 00:09:49,195 Speaker 2: what his staffer Alisa Farras said the other day that 141 00:09:49,275 --> 00:09:52,435 Speaker 2: it ain't just you and me quote, it's kind of remarkable. 142 00:09:52,715 --> 00:09:55,395 Speaker 2: I've been watching the clips from Trump's visit to Iowa, 143 00:09:55,435 --> 00:09:58,235 Speaker 2: and I'm stunned, having spent a lot of time with 144 00:09:58,315 --> 00:10:01,995 Speaker 2: him in twenty twenty and years before, he is slowing down. 145 00:10:02,715 --> 00:10:05,315 Speaker 2: There's a lack of sharpness in what he's saying and 146 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:10,155 Speaker 2: a lack of clarity. Well, it's not just slowing down. 147 00:10:10,835 --> 00:10:14,715 Speaker 2: It's not taking any time at all to keep your 148 00:10:14,795 --> 00:10:19,155 Speaker 2: darker secrets secret. The banter over Dictator on Day one 149 00:10:19,195 --> 00:10:23,115 Speaker 2: with Hannity was an example of that. Why say that? 150 00:10:24,755 --> 00:10:27,555 Speaker 2: It's as John Lecarre wrote in Tinker Taylor's Soldier Spy, 151 00:10:27,635 --> 00:10:31,955 Speaker 2: when his friend postulates to George Smiley that the Russian 152 00:10:31,955 --> 00:10:35,755 Speaker 2: spymaster is fireproof. He is not fireproof because he's a fanatic. 153 00:10:36,515 --> 00:10:39,635 Speaker 2: One day, that lack of moderation will be his downfall. 154 00:10:41,475 --> 00:10:45,715 Speaker 1: That's the point. Trump has stopped making any effort of 155 00:10:45,795 --> 00:10:50,795 Speaker 1: any semblance of any moderation. It is now almost unconceivable 156 00:10:51,435 --> 00:10:54,195 Speaker 1: that he could ever actually do anything to destroy himself. 157 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:58,635 Speaker 1: But remember, to destroy himself, he only has to destroy 158 00:10:58,675 --> 00:11:02,875 Speaker 1: the confidence of about fifty thousand Key voters who were 159 00:11:02,915 --> 00:11:06,795 Speaker 1: going to vote for him. It's like this latest leak 160 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:11,875 Speaker 1: to Axios, what value is there in saying, here's Vice 161 00:11:11,955 --> 00:11:18,315 Speaker 1: President Tucker Carlson, psychopathic white supremacist with a crazy laugh, 162 00:11:19,075 --> 00:11:22,675 Speaker 1: whose career stability makes Keith Olderman's look like that of 163 00:11:22,755 --> 00:11:27,275 Speaker 1: Bob Cratchett. I'm gonna put them in government, along with 164 00:11:27,395 --> 00:11:32,435 Speaker 1: Carrie Lake, whose highest elected office was weekend weather girl 165 00:11:32,555 --> 00:11:37,355 Speaker 1: in Rock Island, Illinois. It's the kind of things you 166 00:11:37,435 --> 00:11:43,755 Speaker 1: do not do to rally your base, nor to scare 167 00:11:43,795 --> 00:11:48,795 Speaker 1: your opponents, but because you really can't stop yourself from 168 00:11:48,835 --> 00:11:51,835 Speaker 1: doing them and you really really want to. Suddenly you 169 00:11:51,875 --> 00:11:55,915 Speaker 1: are more convinced than ever that you can get away 170 00:11:55,955 --> 00:12:01,075 Speaker 1: with them. And if that is not a description of 171 00:12:01,115 --> 00:12:09,275 Speaker 1: the entire Trump Nazi Party, I don't know what it is. Meantime, 172 00:12:09,555 --> 00:12:12,755 Speaker 1: Matt Gates may be available for Trump's wish list or 173 00:12:12,795 --> 00:12:16,915 Speaker 1: for kids parties. He has become a walking human target. 174 00:12:18,075 --> 00:12:21,195 Speaker 1: USA today last night reporting Republicans are thinking of expelling 175 00:12:21,275 --> 00:12:25,875 Speaker 1: him to They quoted one Republican representative anonymously. There were 176 00:12:25,915 --> 00:12:29,075 Speaker 1: a number of people who voted to expel Santos with 177 00:12:29,195 --> 00:12:32,675 Speaker 1: the express intent of thinking through the precedent there on 178 00:12:32,795 --> 00:12:37,235 Speaker 1: what happens next. There was a lot of forethought about 179 00:12:37,275 --> 00:12:39,995 Speaker 1: that precedent and what would happen when a report on 180 00:12:40,115 --> 00:12:47,475 Speaker 1: Gates comes out. A report shortly after the USA Today story, 181 00:12:47,555 --> 00:12:51,115 Speaker 1: CNN produced evidence that the report, the investigation into Gates 182 00:12:51,235 --> 00:12:56,515 Speaker 1: and Miners, is still alive. The Chairman and ranking member 183 00:12:56,555 --> 00:13:01,515 Speaker 1: have authorized staff to conduct an interview, reads a document. 184 00:13:01,595 --> 00:13:09,675 Speaker 1: CNN got an interview with a witness, Bye Felicia. Every 185 00:13:09,875 --> 00:13:15,395 Speaker 1: Robespierre eventually meets his guillotine. And meanwhile, as to the 186 00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:18,075 Speaker 1: guy Gates put into the speakership, Mike Johnson is having 187 00:13:20,555 --> 00:13:24,155 Speaker 1: an episode. I think that's the word, an episode. He 188 00:13:24,275 --> 00:13:27,355 Speaker 1: told a Christian Nationalist meeting the other night that he 189 00:13:27,755 --> 00:14:14,955 Speaker 1: is Moses. Mike Johnson, come on down, You're the next 190 00:14:14,995 --> 00:14:17,915 Speaker 1: contestant on the rougeous nut. 191 00:14:17,955 --> 00:14:18,635 Speaker 2: Isn't right? 192 00:14:22,075 --> 00:14:27,275 Speaker 1: Thank you, Nancy Faus, mister speaker. That wasn't God. It's 193 00:14:27,355 --> 00:14:32,315 Speaker 1: a tumor. By the way. Mike Johnson followed up his 194 00:14:32,355 --> 00:14:38,595 Speaker 1: revelation that he's Moses. Hey, ma, get this guy, He's Moses. 195 00:14:40,435 --> 00:14:43,115 Speaker 1: He followed up his revelation that he's Moses by trying 196 00:14:43,155 --> 00:14:46,635 Speaker 1: to hold up AID to Israel and blackmail the Senate 197 00:14:46,675 --> 00:14:51,995 Speaker 1: with it. If you're Moses, boy, there's the desert, get wandering. 198 00:14:52,635 --> 00:14:58,675 Speaker 1: See you in twenty sixty three. And comic relief from 199 00:14:58,715 --> 00:15:03,835 Speaker 1: January sixth. Alan Hosteedder, a former police chief. Everybody seems 200 00:15:03,835 --> 00:15:07,675 Speaker 1: surprised by the gets eleven years for January sixth. He 201 00:15:07,755 --> 00:15:11,555 Speaker 1: brought an array of lethal weapons, took a car rather 202 00:15:11,595 --> 00:15:14,075 Speaker 1: than a plane so he could bring hatchets and the like, 203 00:15:14,675 --> 00:15:17,315 Speaker 1: took them with him to the Capitol, but is now 204 00:15:17,355 --> 00:15:24,875 Speaker 1: insisting it was an inside job. Thousands of plants. The 205 00:15:24,995 --> 00:15:27,715 Speaker 1: leader of the oathkeepers a plant. He took an eighteen 206 00:15:27,755 --> 00:15:30,715 Speaker 1: year sentence as part of being a government plant, and 207 00:15:30,795 --> 00:15:37,635 Speaker 1: then finally it happened. Nutjob meets nutjob. Before sentencing, Hosteader 208 00:15:37,715 --> 00:15:42,275 Speaker 1: explains that Ashley Babbitt was not shot and isn't dead, 209 00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,275 Speaker 1: and guests who was waiting for him in the hallway 210 00:15:45,955 --> 00:15:50,195 Speaker 1: not either than Ashley Babbitt's mother quote, I assure you 211 00:15:50,275 --> 00:15:53,275 Speaker 1: she is dead. What the F is it? You're trying 212 00:15:53,315 --> 00:15:59,635 Speaker 1: to say, to which Hosteedder answered, was she cremated? Regrettably, 213 00:16:00,635 --> 00:16:26,395 Speaker 1: Ashley Babbitt's mother did not reply, was your brain cream 214 00:16:27,235 --> 00:16:32,355 Speaker 1: the sound of box takata? We think it's box tikata. Anyway, 215 00:16:32,395 --> 00:16:33,955 Speaker 1: it means it's time for the daily roundup of the 216 00:16:33,955 --> 00:16:37,835 Speaker 1: miss Grants, morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens who constitute 217 00:16:37,875 --> 00:16:42,675 Speaker 1: two days worse persons in the world worse a tie. 218 00:16:43,315 --> 00:16:46,155 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna play this first one. It's not just 219 00:16:46,275 --> 00:16:50,475 Speaker 1: Congresswoman Lisa McClain of Michigan Maga idiot. It's Congresswoman Lisa 220 00:16:50,555 --> 00:16:55,235 Speaker 1: McClain of Michigan Maga idiot, trying to explain how proud 221 00:16:55,275 --> 00:16:59,555 Speaker 1: she is to be MAGA and then making a mega 222 00:16:59,675 --> 00:17:00,635 Speaker 1: idiot of herself. 223 00:17:00,955 --> 00:17:06,595 Speaker 3: So as one of your so called Magapublicans, who again 224 00:17:06,795 --> 00:17:12,155 Speaker 3: I don't apologize for because under Maga Republican leadership, I 225 00:17:12,235 --> 00:17:18,875 Speaker 3: might remind everybody, crime was down. Inflation, excuse me, crime 226 00:17:19,195 --> 00:17:26,115 Speaker 3: was up, Crime was down under the last administration. Clearly 227 00:17:26,315 --> 00:17:27,355 Speaker 3: crime was down. 228 00:17:27,475 --> 00:17:32,755 Speaker 1: Thank you, congresswoman for that clear and convincing elucidation. Now 229 00:17:32,795 --> 00:17:36,075 Speaker 1: for almost anybody else, that would have been the highlight 230 00:17:36,115 --> 00:17:40,795 Speaker 1: of Congresswoman Lisa McClain's idiocy, but last year she publicly 231 00:17:40,795 --> 00:17:46,115 Speaker 1: claimed that Trump caught Osama bin Laden, so she has many, 232 00:17:46,555 --> 00:17:52,155 Speaker 1: many years of quality self owning idiocy ahead of her, 233 00:17:52,915 --> 00:17:55,395 Speaker 1: while she's still only tied for the up and coming 234 00:17:55,675 --> 00:17:59,755 Speaker 1: would be Congressman Philip Seawan Grillo's aspirations of being worst 235 00:17:59,755 --> 00:18:02,555 Speaker 1: person in the world. He is running to succeed George 236 00:18:02,595 --> 00:18:06,235 Speaker 1: Santos as the rep from the third District of New York. 237 00:18:06,715 --> 00:18:10,675 Speaker 1: The Democrats yesterday chose former Congressman Tom squaz and planned 238 00:18:10,675 --> 00:18:14,875 Speaker 1: to spend about eleventy billion to regain that seat. But 239 00:18:14,955 --> 00:18:17,395 Speaker 1: as to Grillow and the Republicans, he may not be 240 00:18:17,515 --> 00:18:19,995 Speaker 1: the nominee because he has another job. And when I 241 00:18:20,035 --> 00:18:23,355 Speaker 1: say job, I mean he's probably gonna be busy going 242 00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:27,155 Speaker 1: to prison. Mister Grillow was found guilty on Tuesday of 243 00:18:27,195 --> 00:18:30,235 Speaker 1: this week on a felon account of obstruction of an 244 00:18:30,235 --> 00:18:33,355 Speaker 1: official proceeding, And by this point in the plot you 245 00:18:33,515 --> 00:18:38,675 Speaker 1: can probably guess which official proceeding. That's right. Grillow broke 246 00:18:38,675 --> 00:18:42,875 Speaker 1: into the Capitol on January sixth, went in several different times. 247 00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:46,555 Speaker 1: Once went in through a broken window, recorded videos of himself, 248 00:18:46,595 --> 00:18:49,955 Speaker 1: and was interviewed by others to explain, quote, I'm here 249 00:18:49,995 --> 00:18:54,875 Speaker 1: to stop the steal. It's our effing house. But even 250 00:18:54,915 --> 00:18:58,035 Speaker 1: for one of Trump's slaves, mister Grillow would be Republican 251 00:18:58,075 --> 00:19:02,555 Speaker 1: congressman is pretty effing stupid. At his trial, in his defense, 252 00:19:02,595 --> 00:19:05,195 Speaker 1: he explained that he thought he was authorized break into 253 00:19:05,235 --> 00:19:08,915 Speaker 1: the Capitol. And better still, Grillo testified that he didn't 254 00:19:08,955 --> 00:19:14,195 Speaker 1: realize how serious what he did was because he didn't 255 00:19:14,235 --> 00:19:18,035 Speaker 1: know that the capital was where Congress met. 256 00:19:19,195 --> 00:19:26,675 Speaker 2: I know what a surprise, and and. 257 00:19:25,355 --> 00:19:29,995 Speaker 1: And Prior to January sixth, mister Grillo was the New 258 00:19:30,115 --> 00:19:33,795 Speaker 1: York State Republican leader for the New York twenty fourth 259 00:19:33,835 --> 00:19:38,395 Speaker 1: Assembly District, which is in Queen's next to Q Gardens. 260 00:19:39,795 --> 00:19:44,035 Speaker 1: A Republican party official didn't know where Congress meant running 261 00:19:44,075 --> 00:19:48,275 Speaker 1: for Congress, and if he were nominated and elected to 262 00:19:48,275 --> 00:19:50,915 Speaker 1: succeed George Santos, he'd still be only like the fifteenth 263 00:19:50,995 --> 00:19:55,635 Speaker 1: or sixteenth thumbest Republican in there. The runner up were 264 00:19:55,715 --> 00:19:59,115 Speaker 1: Sir Buffalo Bill's head coach Sean McDermott, who confirmed in 265 00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:02,795 Speaker 1: a Tiere news conference yesterday that the media report is true. 266 00:20:03,235 --> 00:20:06,835 Speaker 1: He did reference nine one eleven in a team meeting 267 00:20:06,835 --> 00:20:10,035 Speaker 1: in twenty nineteen, in an attempt to motivate the bills. 268 00:20:10,395 --> 00:20:14,235 Speaker 1: According to the substack go Long, what in fact McDermott 269 00:20:14,235 --> 00:20:17,675 Speaker 1: did was quote cited the hijackers as a group of 270 00:20:17,715 --> 00:20:20,915 Speaker 1: people who were all able to get on the same 271 00:20:21,075 --> 00:20:28,275 Speaker 1: page to orchestrate attacks to perfection unquote key not long 272 00:20:28,475 --> 00:20:31,755 Speaker 1: after nine to eleven two sports figures that we heard of, 273 00:20:31,795 --> 00:20:33,955 Speaker 1: at least one of them, the late Hall of Fame 274 00:20:33,995 --> 00:20:37,835 Speaker 1: football coach Bobby Bowden used nine to eleven tried to 275 00:20:37,955 --> 00:20:40,675 Speaker 1: within a sports context. The ex general manager of the 276 00:20:40,675 --> 00:20:44,075 Speaker 1: Cincinnati rech Jim Bowden said, the baseball players Union, as 277 00:20:44,115 --> 00:20:46,915 Speaker 1: it contemplated a two thousand and two strike, might as 278 00:20:46,955 --> 00:20:50,075 Speaker 1: well fly the planes into the towers, is what he said. 279 00:20:50,715 --> 00:20:54,355 Speaker 1: The football coach, same spelling, different pronunciation, thought that the 280 00:20:54,515 --> 00:20:58,435 Speaker 1: let's roll chant attributed to Flight ninety three passenger Todd 281 00:20:58,435 --> 00:21:02,795 Speaker 1: Beemer would be a great motto for his football team 282 00:21:02,795 --> 00:21:07,395 Speaker 1: because that guy that plane when they was fixing to dad, 283 00:21:08,715 --> 00:21:10,955 Speaker 1: you see where he went with this, I thought then, 284 00:21:11,475 --> 00:21:13,995 Speaker 1: and I think now both of them and Boden not 285 00:21:14,035 --> 00:21:16,915 Speaker 1: only apologized for it years later, but he actually apologized 286 00:21:16,955 --> 00:21:19,475 Speaker 1: to me, and we did a couple of games together 287 00:21:19,555 --> 00:21:23,715 Speaker 1: on ESPN Radio, Boden said some therapy had showed to 288 00:21:23,795 --> 00:21:26,555 Speaker 1: him that he was using the analogy and treating it 289 00:21:26,595 --> 00:21:30,315 Speaker 1: so lightheartedly because bluntley, he was trying to minimize how 290 00:21:30,395 --> 00:21:32,955 Speaker 1: scared he was after nine to eleven. I think both 291 00:21:32,995 --> 00:21:35,515 Speaker 1: of those guys were suffering from nine to eleven post 292 00:21:35,555 --> 00:21:38,715 Speaker 1: traumatic stress disorder. In fact, truth be told, I think 293 00:21:38,955 --> 00:21:42,195 Speaker 1: most of America in two thousand and one suffered from 294 00:21:42,195 --> 00:21:44,755 Speaker 1: post traumatic stress disorder, and ninety nine percent of the 295 00:21:44,835 --> 00:21:48,195 Speaker 1: victims have never gotten any treatment, which may be why 296 00:21:48,235 --> 00:21:53,515 Speaker 1: we are where we are today. People forget, I mean 297 00:21:53,555 --> 00:21:57,275 Speaker 1: the people at HBO sure forgot. But Bill Maher got 298 00:21:57,315 --> 00:22:00,795 Speaker 1: fired from his nightly ABC talk show when a week 299 00:22:00,835 --> 00:22:03,275 Speaker 1: after the attacks, he said that in this equation, the 300 00:22:03,315 --> 00:22:07,075 Speaker 1: Americans had quote been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 301 00:22:07,115 --> 00:22:11,355 Speaker 1: two thousand miles away while quote staying in the airplane 302 00:22:11,395 --> 00:22:14,315 Speaker 1: when it hits the building. Say what you want about it. 303 00:22:14,315 --> 00:22:20,355 Speaker 1: It's not cowardly, unquote, but the Bills coach mister McDermott 304 00:22:20,875 --> 00:22:24,435 Speaker 1: did this in twenty nineteen. I think the reaction to 305 00:22:24,515 --> 00:22:26,635 Speaker 1: what he has now admitted to is best summed up 306 00:22:26,635 --> 00:22:30,355 Speaker 1: by the famous tweet by the social media absurdist drill 307 00:22:30,915 --> 00:22:34,555 Speaker 1: quote issuing correction on a previous post of mind regarding 308 00:22:34,595 --> 00:22:38,115 Speaker 1: the terror group Isle you do not under any circumstances 309 00:22:38,195 --> 00:22:42,155 Speaker 1: quote got a hand it to them, unquote. But our 310 00:22:42,195 --> 00:22:50,275 Speaker 1: winners the worst vive Aq Ramaswami and Nick Fuentes, white supremacists, 311 00:22:50,755 --> 00:22:53,155 Speaker 1: both of them. The stuff that would have gotten you 312 00:22:53,355 --> 00:22:57,635 Speaker 1: thrown out of American public life, even the Republican Party, 313 00:22:58,155 --> 00:23:03,675 Speaker 1: even what ten years ago the stuff is now what 314 00:23:03,875 --> 00:23:08,595 Speaker 1: makes you a national figure in the Republican fascist Trump 315 00:23:08,635 --> 00:23:13,395 Speaker 1: for King Party during the GOP debate Wednesday, and yes, 316 00:23:13,475 --> 00:23:16,995 Speaker 1: CNN has inexplicably announced it's going to televise two more 317 00:23:17,395 --> 00:23:21,555 Speaker 1: Republican debates in January, probably because they don't know what 318 00:23:21,595 --> 00:23:25,395 Speaker 1: to do now that the Charles Barkley gayls King Show 319 00:23:25,435 --> 00:23:28,875 Speaker 1: has premiered and somehow it did not draw three hundred 320 00:23:28,875 --> 00:23:34,315 Speaker 1: million viewers compared to none for MSNBC. During the last debate, 321 00:23:34,675 --> 00:23:38,595 Speaker 1: Ramaswami not only embraced the anti Semitic great replacement theory, 322 00:23:38,835 --> 00:23:41,275 Speaker 1: the paranoid psychosis that led to the mass shooting at 323 00:23:41,275 --> 00:23:43,875 Speaker 1: the Pittsburgh Synagogue, and he not only insisted that it 324 00:23:43,915 --> 00:23:46,635 Speaker 1: was not just a conspiracy theory, but quote a basic 325 00:23:46,675 --> 00:23:50,275 Speaker 1: statement of the Democratic Parties platform. But when the noted 326 00:23:50,355 --> 00:23:54,595 Speaker 1: anti Semite and racist Nick Fuentes tweeted a clip praising 327 00:23:54,675 --> 00:24:01,795 Speaker 1: Ramaswami for spewing his own bilge, Ramaswami retweeted Fuentes, Now, look, 328 00:24:02,235 --> 00:24:05,355 Speaker 1: Ramaswami is either a brain dead hate mond who has 329 00:24:05,435 --> 00:24:09,915 Speaker 1: one skill talking fast, talking fast, or he's just a 330 00:24:10,035 --> 00:24:13,915 Speaker 1: scheister con man Fuentes, it's a little easier. He's just 331 00:24:13,915 --> 00:24:17,075 Speaker 1: a piece of shit. But they do every time out 332 00:24:17,395 --> 00:24:20,795 Speaker 1: make me laugh darkly. But I'm still laughing because the 333 00:24:20,915 --> 00:24:24,595 Speaker 1: essence of the great replacement theory is that quote the 334 00:24:24,675 --> 00:24:29,635 Speaker 1: Jews unquote are arranging to replace all the white people 335 00:24:30,075 --> 00:24:35,155 Speaker 1: with quote third world voters, meaning Hispanics, Africans, people from 336 00:24:35,155 --> 00:24:38,555 Speaker 1: the Middle East, Asia, the Indian subcontinent. And I never 337 00:24:38,595 --> 00:24:41,235 Speaker 1: get over the fact that while Republicans and fascists and 338 00:24:41,355 --> 00:24:46,075 Speaker 1: other Trump slaves will cheer Ramswami and Fuentes as long 339 00:24:46,155 --> 00:24:49,675 Speaker 1: as Ramaswami and Fuentes are parroting this excuse for why 340 00:24:49,755 --> 00:24:53,755 Speaker 1: they the white folk failed at life, it has apparently 341 00:24:53,795 --> 00:24:57,195 Speaker 1: never occurred to Ramaswami or Fuentes that if their crowd 342 00:24:57,235 --> 00:25:00,955 Speaker 1: really does gain power and really does seal the border 343 00:25:01,315 --> 00:25:04,275 Speaker 1: and really does turn away the I don't know the 344 00:25:04,315 --> 00:25:10,155 Speaker 1: horror words that aren't there when the Trumpets are out 345 00:25:10,195 --> 00:25:14,835 Speaker 1: of immigrants to purge, when the ethnic cleansing is over, 346 00:25:16,315 --> 00:25:20,875 Speaker 1: You know, Nick, and Viveke, you do know who your 347 00:25:20,915 --> 00:25:24,155 Speaker 1: group is going to turn on next, right, because what 348 00:25:24,275 --> 00:25:29,275 Speaker 1: Trump wants here requires that there will always be an 349 00:25:29,515 --> 00:25:34,715 Speaker 1: other to persecute. And gentlemen, Nick, Viveke, I hate to 350 00:25:34,755 --> 00:25:37,755 Speaker 1: tell you this, but Viveke, your parents were born in India. 351 00:25:37,835 --> 00:25:39,875 Speaker 1: And Nick, you're a little vague on this, but you 352 00:25:39,915 --> 00:25:42,835 Speaker 1: have said your father's family is from Mexico. And sooner 353 00:25:43,035 --> 00:25:47,515 Speaker 1: or later, when they run out of new others to purge, 354 00:25:48,075 --> 00:25:51,755 Speaker 1: Trump will point over at you Viveke Ramaswami and you 355 00:25:51,955 --> 00:25:56,435 Speaker 1: Nick Fuentes and say, who are those brown guys? And 356 00:25:56,475 --> 00:26:00,555 Speaker 1: you'll all be surprised and shocked as they drag you 357 00:26:00,595 --> 00:26:02,875 Speaker 1: away by your feet, And the next thing you know, 358 00:26:03,275 --> 00:26:06,595 Speaker 1: you two will be in camps with the rest of us. 359 00:26:07,755 --> 00:26:11,715 Speaker 1: Viveq Ramaswami and Nick Fuentes, or as they would be 360 00:26:11,795 --> 00:26:15,235 Speaker 1: known in a trumpst America. By twenty twenty seven, twenty 361 00:26:15,275 --> 00:26:20,795 Speaker 1: twenty eight at the latest, Fresh Meat two days worse, 362 00:26:21,235 --> 00:26:33,315 Speaker 1: Parson ignored. Now, well, you may be wondering why we're 363 00:26:33,355 --> 00:26:36,515 Speaker 1: already done with poorest persons, and the commentary is over, 364 00:26:36,595 --> 00:26:41,795 Speaker 1: And the answer is, I have a thing called scintillating sotoma. 365 00:26:42,555 --> 00:26:45,835 Speaker 1: I think I once knew an exotic dancer named scintillating scirtoma. 366 00:26:46,515 --> 00:26:49,355 Speaker 1: It sounds weird, and it is weird halfway. It's not 367 00:26:49,475 --> 00:26:52,675 Speaker 1: usually really painful, and it's not that serious. And sometimes 368 00:26:52,675 --> 00:26:56,555 Speaker 1: it's called an ocular migraine. But while often connected to 369 00:26:56,595 --> 00:26:59,235 Speaker 1: a migraine by itself, it is nowhere near as debilitating 370 00:26:59,315 --> 00:27:00,675 Speaker 1: or upsetting as a migraine. 371 00:27:00,715 --> 00:27:01,395 Speaker 2: I've had those two. 372 00:27:01,915 --> 00:27:05,035 Speaker 1: But what you get is a bright pattern in the 373 00:27:05,035 --> 00:27:08,115 Speaker 1: middle of your field of vision, usually in one eye, 374 00:27:08,195 --> 00:27:09,915 Speaker 1: and then it usually gets larger and larger, and it 375 00:27:09,955 --> 00:27:12,595 Speaker 1: will spread to both eyes, and in my case it 376 00:27:12,715 --> 00:27:16,235 Speaker 1: usually hits its peak and looks like like this kind 377 00:27:16,275 --> 00:27:22,795 Speaker 1: of radiating, brilliant white square that looks like this is 378 00:27:22,835 --> 00:27:27,675 Speaker 1: what it looks like, a glowing square zipper right in 379 00:27:27,675 --> 00:27:30,475 Speaker 1: the middle of everything. Watching a hockey game. There it 380 00:27:30,555 --> 00:27:32,595 Speaker 1: is right in the middle, about an inch square in 381 00:27:32,635 --> 00:27:35,675 Speaker 1: your field of vision, and it moves and it recedes, 382 00:27:35,715 --> 00:27:37,955 Speaker 1: and then it sometimes comes back. I mean, I had 383 00:27:37,995 --> 00:27:41,115 Speaker 1: friends in high school who would have paid good money 384 00:27:41,595 --> 00:27:46,475 Speaker 1: for hallucinations. This vivid it's brought on by the things 385 00:27:46,475 --> 00:27:51,195 Speaker 1: that bring on migraines, stress, blood flow problems, drugs, additives, 386 00:27:51,635 --> 00:27:54,595 Speaker 1: drugs you're allergic to, additives, you're allergic to the usual 387 00:27:54,715 --> 00:28:01,355 Speaker 1: range of stuff. Happily didn't really hurt, but seeing through 388 00:28:01,395 --> 00:28:03,035 Speaker 1: them is kind of difficult, at least for a half 389 00:28:03,075 --> 00:28:05,915 Speaker 1: an hour an hour or so, and they when they're gone, 390 00:28:06,035 --> 00:28:09,115 Speaker 1: they leave you exhausted. I mean, it feels like I've 391 00:28:09,115 --> 00:28:12,155 Speaker 1: been trying to lift weights with my head. The first 392 00:28:12,155 --> 00:28:15,195 Speaker 1: one I ever had was one night, about nine thirty 393 00:28:15,195 --> 00:28:17,195 Speaker 1: ten o'clock at Sports Center. I had written the script 394 00:28:17,195 --> 00:28:21,075 Speaker 1: and suddenly here comes this square, glowing box in the 395 00:28:21,075 --> 00:28:23,555 Speaker 1: middle of my vision. And I said, well, this is 396 00:28:23,595 --> 00:28:26,635 Speaker 1: a problem because I can't read the teleprompter and I 397 00:28:26,675 --> 00:28:28,675 Speaker 1: can't look down and read the script. I can't even 398 00:28:28,715 --> 00:28:31,635 Speaker 1: find the script. So I told the producer and I said, look, 399 00:28:31,675 --> 00:28:34,195 Speaker 1: let me try and lie down for half an hour. 400 00:28:34,435 --> 00:28:36,435 Speaker 1: And they went and they told Linda Kohane, who was 401 00:28:36,475 --> 00:28:38,635 Speaker 1: doing the two AM show, to get ready to do 402 00:28:38,715 --> 00:28:41,355 Speaker 1: the eleven PM show, and she screamed, but I can't 403 00:28:41,395 --> 00:28:44,875 Speaker 1: read Ko's copy, And happily I dozed off in a 404 00:28:44,955 --> 00:28:46,835 Speaker 1: dark room, and half an hour later it was fine, 405 00:28:46,835 --> 00:28:48,875 Speaker 1: and Linda Cohne said she was the happiest person on 406 00:28:48,915 --> 00:28:54,675 Speaker 1: earth anyway. I used to get them once every few years. Now, eh, 407 00:28:54,755 --> 00:28:58,795 Speaker 1: it's a couple a year maybe, but sometimes it's a 408 00:28:58,835 --> 00:29:01,475 Speaker 1: bunch in waves over a couple of days. And right 409 00:29:01,515 --> 00:29:05,275 Speaker 1: now I'm midwave. Obviously I've been reading the script here, 410 00:29:05,355 --> 00:29:08,195 Speaker 1: so there isn't one right there in the moment. Nothing 411 00:29:08,275 --> 00:29:11,555 Speaker 1: is scintillating right at the moment, especially this copy. But 412 00:29:12,115 --> 00:29:13,875 Speaker 1: I had time enough to be able to record this 413 00:29:13,995 --> 00:29:16,875 Speaker 1: and the opening of the show. So I've got two 414 00:29:16,995 --> 00:29:20,155 Speaker 1: editions of Friday with Thurber and if you want to 415 00:29:20,195 --> 00:29:22,875 Speaker 1: skip them, no worries, because I have just given you 416 00:29:22,915 --> 00:29:26,275 Speaker 1: the least amount of new Countdown that my conscience will 417 00:29:26,315 --> 00:29:29,035 Speaker 1: let me get away with. And now I'm going to 418 00:29:29,075 --> 00:29:32,995 Speaker 1: go lie down till it all goes away with the 419 00:29:33,035 --> 00:29:37,435 Speaker 1: observation that I wish that would work with Trump, Thurbernecks, 420 00:29:37,875 --> 00:29:54,635 Speaker 1: this is Countdown show. 421 00:29:55,515 --> 00:30:03,715 Speaker 4: These are the stakes who would never abuse power as 422 00:30:03,955 --> 00:30:06,435 Speaker 4: retribution against anybody except. 423 00:30:06,115 --> 00:30:09,395 Speaker 1: The day one, except what he's going to face, except 424 00:30:09,395 --> 00:30:10,875 Speaker 1: the day one he says, you're not going to be 425 00:30:10,875 --> 00:30:14,035 Speaker 1: a dictator. I said, no, no, no other than day one. 426 00:30:14,395 --> 00:30:16,915 Speaker 1: We must either love each other. 427 00:30:18,755 --> 00:30:19,555 Speaker 2: Or we must die. 428 00:30:19,955 --> 00:30:25,355 Speaker 1: Vote for President Biden on November fifth. The stakes are 429 00:30:25,395 --> 00:30:35,715 Speaker 1: too high for you to stay home to the top 430 00:30:35,755 --> 00:30:38,355 Speaker 1: of the countdown and fridays with Thurber, and I am 431 00:30:38,395 --> 00:30:40,875 Speaker 1: not going to dare suggest to you that there isn't 432 00:30:40,915 --> 00:30:44,835 Speaker 1: at least something misogynistic about mister Prebble gets rid of 433 00:30:44,875 --> 00:30:48,435 Speaker 1: his wife. But the ultimate point of this short story, 434 00:30:48,555 --> 00:30:52,595 Speaker 1: so masterfully crafted by James Thurber, this matter of fact 435 00:30:52,715 --> 00:30:55,395 Speaker 1: style that almost makes you forget you are hearing about 436 00:30:55,395 --> 00:30:58,675 Speaker 1: a man trying to murder his wife, is in a 437 00:30:58,755 --> 00:31:02,555 Speaker 1: larger sense, about the fact that women are more successful 438 00:31:02,635 --> 00:31:06,195 Speaker 1: than men. This story, he does not compliment men, it 439 00:31:06,235 --> 00:31:09,115 Speaker 1: does not compliment women, It does not compliment human beings. 440 00:31:09,715 --> 00:31:13,835 Speaker 1: But it is still marvelous. Mister Preble Gets rid of 441 00:31:13,835 --> 00:31:20,515 Speaker 1: his Wife by James Thurber. Mister Prebble was a plump, 442 00:31:20,755 --> 00:31:24,315 Speaker 1: middle aged lawyer in Scarsdale. He used to kid with 443 00:31:24,355 --> 00:31:28,795 Speaker 1: his stenographer about running away with him. Let's run away together, 444 00:31:29,075 --> 00:31:33,355 Speaker 1: he would say, during a pause in dictation, alrighty, she 445 00:31:33,395 --> 00:31:37,475 Speaker 1: would say, One rainy Monday, afternoon, mister Prebble was more 446 00:31:37,515 --> 00:31:42,635 Speaker 1: serious about it than usual. Let's run away together, said 447 00:31:42,635 --> 00:31:47,955 Speaker 1: mister Preble. Alrighty, said his stenographer. Mister Prebble jingled the 448 00:31:47,995 --> 00:31:51,075 Speaker 1: keys in his pocket and looked out the window. My 449 00:31:51,195 --> 00:31:53,395 Speaker 1: wife would be glad to get rid of me, he said. 450 00:31:53,995 --> 00:31:58,875 Speaker 1: Would you give you a divorce, asked the stenographer. I 451 00:31:58,915 --> 00:32:03,115 Speaker 1: don't suppose so, he said. The stenographer laughed, you'd have 452 00:32:03,155 --> 00:32:07,915 Speaker 1: to get rid of your wife, she said. Mister Preble 453 00:32:08,035 --> 00:32:11,115 Speaker 1: was unusually silent at dinner that night. About half an 454 00:32:11,115 --> 00:32:14,195 Speaker 1: hour after coffee, he spoke, without looking up from his paper, 455 00:32:15,395 --> 00:32:19,435 Speaker 1: Let's go down in the cellar. Mister Prebble said to 456 00:32:19,475 --> 00:32:23,115 Speaker 1: his wife, what far? She said, not looking up from 457 00:32:23,155 --> 00:32:29,315 Speaker 1: her book. Oh, I don't know, he said. We uh 458 00:32:29,875 --> 00:32:31,875 Speaker 1: never go down in the cellar anymore the way we 459 00:32:31,995 --> 00:32:34,955 Speaker 1: used to. We never did go down in the cellar 460 00:32:34,995 --> 00:32:38,355 Speaker 1: that I remember, said missus Prebble. I could rest easy 461 00:32:38,435 --> 00:32:40,515 Speaker 1: the balance of my life if I never went down 462 00:32:40,555 --> 00:32:44,555 Speaker 1: in the cellar. Mister Preble was silent for several minutes. 463 00:32:46,155 --> 00:32:48,755 Speaker 1: Supposing I said, it meant a whole lot to me. 464 00:32:49,195 --> 00:32:53,235 Speaker 1: Began mister Prebble, what's come over you? His wife demanded. 465 00:32:53,275 --> 00:32:56,035 Speaker 1: It's cold down there and there's absolutely nothing to do. 466 00:32:58,035 --> 00:33:02,515 Speaker 1: We could pick up pieces of coal, said mister Prebble. 467 00:33:02,715 --> 00:33:05,555 Speaker 1: We might get up some sort of game with pieces 468 00:33:05,595 --> 00:33:09,675 Speaker 1: of coal. I don't want to, said his wife. Anyway, 469 00:33:09,715 --> 00:33:14,875 Speaker 1: I'm reading, listen, said mister Prebble, rising and walking up 470 00:33:14,915 --> 00:33:17,635 Speaker 1: and down. Why won't you come down in the cellar. 471 00:33:17,715 --> 00:33:19,595 Speaker 1: You can read down there as far as that goes. 472 00:33:20,715 --> 00:33:23,675 Speaker 1: There isn't a good enough light down there, she said. 473 00:33:23,755 --> 00:33:26,795 Speaker 1: And anyway, I'm not going to go down in the cellar. 474 00:33:26,835 --> 00:33:30,795 Speaker 1: You may as well make up your mind. That gee whiz, 475 00:33:31,355 --> 00:33:33,955 Speaker 1: said mister Prebble, kicking into the edge of a rug. 476 00:33:34,315 --> 00:33:36,675 Speaker 1: Other people's wives go down in the cellar. Why is 477 00:33:36,715 --> 00:33:39,315 Speaker 1: it you never want to do anything? I come home 478 00:33:39,675 --> 00:33:41,835 Speaker 1: worn out from the office, and you won't even go 479 00:33:41,915 --> 00:33:44,595 Speaker 1: down in the cellar with me. God knows, it isn't 480 00:33:44,675 --> 00:33:46,915 Speaker 1: very far. It isn't as if I was asking you 481 00:33:47,035 --> 00:33:51,235 Speaker 1: to go to the movies or someplace. I don't want 482 00:33:51,315 --> 00:33:56,555 Speaker 1: to go, shouted missus Prebble. Mister Prebble sat down on 483 00:33:56,595 --> 00:34:01,555 Speaker 1: the edge of a davenport. All right, all right, he said, 484 00:34:02,595 --> 00:34:05,875 Speaker 1: He picked up the newspaper again. I wish you'd let 485 00:34:05,875 --> 00:34:08,795 Speaker 1: me tell you more about it. It's kind of a surprise. 486 00:34:10,515 --> 00:34:15,875 Speaker 1: Well you quit harping on that subject, asked missus Prebble. Listen, 487 00:34:16,115 --> 00:34:18,675 Speaker 1: said mister Prebble, leaping to his feet, I might as 488 00:34:18,715 --> 00:34:20,555 Speaker 1: well tell you the truth instead of beating around the bush. 489 00:34:20,755 --> 00:34:22,315 Speaker 1: I want to get rid of you so I can 490 00:34:22,355 --> 00:34:25,035 Speaker 1: marry my stenographer. Is there anything especially wrong about that? 491 00:34:25,355 --> 00:34:28,035 Speaker 1: People do it every day. Love is something you can't control. 492 00:34:28,195 --> 00:34:32,115 Speaker 1: We've been all over that, said missus Prebble. I'm not 493 00:34:32,595 --> 00:34:38,475 Speaker 1: going to go all over that again. I just wanted 494 00:34:38,515 --> 00:34:41,355 Speaker 1: you to know how things are, said mister Prebble. But 495 00:34:41,475 --> 00:34:45,315 Speaker 1: you have to take everything so literally. Good Lord, do 496 00:34:45,475 --> 00:34:47,075 Speaker 1: you suppose I really. 497 00:34:46,875 --> 00:34:49,275 Speaker 2: Wanted to go down in the cellar and make up 498 00:34:49,315 --> 00:34:53,755 Speaker 2: some silly game with pieces of coal. I never believed 499 00:34:53,795 --> 00:34:56,995 Speaker 2: that for a minute, said missus Preble. I knew all 500 00:34:57,035 --> 00:34:59,155 Speaker 2: along you wanted to get me down there and bury me. 501 00:35:00,435 --> 00:35:04,635 Speaker 2: You can say that now after I told you, said 502 00:35:04,715 --> 00:35:07,035 Speaker 2: mister Prebble. But it would never have occurred to you 503 00:35:07,075 --> 00:35:10,915 Speaker 2: if I hadn't. You didn't tell me. I got it 504 00:35:10,995 --> 00:35:14,555 Speaker 2: out of you, said missus Prebble. Anyway, I'm always two 505 00:35:14,555 --> 00:35:17,955 Speaker 2: steps ahead of what you're thinking. You're never within a 506 00:35:18,035 --> 00:35:20,595 Speaker 2: mile of what I'm thinking, said mister Prebble. Is that 507 00:35:20,715 --> 00:35:23,035 Speaker 2: so I knew you wanted to bury me the minute 508 00:35:23,075 --> 00:35:26,315 Speaker 2: you got some foot in this house tonight, missus Prebble 509 00:35:26,475 --> 00:35:31,075 Speaker 2: held him with a glare. Now that's just plain damn exaggeration, 510 00:35:31,315 --> 00:35:34,875 Speaker 2: said mister Prebble, considerably annoyed. You knew nothing of the sort. 511 00:35:34,915 --> 00:35:36,155 Speaker 2: As a matter of fact, I never thought of it 512 00:35:36,275 --> 00:35:39,115 Speaker 2: till just a few minutes ago. It was in the 513 00:35:39,115 --> 00:35:42,755 Speaker 2: back of your mind, said missus Prebble. I suppose this 514 00:35:43,115 --> 00:35:48,075 Speaker 2: filing woman puts you up to it. You needn't get sarcastic, 515 00:35:48,555 --> 00:35:51,355 Speaker 2: said mister Prebble. I have plenty of people to file 516 00:35:51,635 --> 00:35:54,675 Speaker 2: without having her file. She doesn't know anything about this, 517 00:35:54,915 --> 00:35:57,035 Speaker 2: She isn't in on it. I was going to tell 518 00:35:57,035 --> 00:35:59,395 Speaker 2: her you'd gone to visit some friends and fell over 519 00:35:59,475 --> 00:36:03,315 Speaker 2: a cliff. She wants me to get a divorce. That's 520 00:36:03,355 --> 00:36:07,755 Speaker 2: a laugh, said missus Prebble. That's a laugh. You may 521 00:36:07,875 --> 00:36:11,755 Speaker 2: bury me, but you'll never get a divorce. She knows 522 00:36:11,755 --> 00:36:14,155 Speaker 2: that I told her that, said mister Prebble. I mean 523 00:36:14,675 --> 00:36:17,875 Speaker 2: I told her I'd never get a divorce. Oh, you 524 00:36:17,995 --> 00:36:21,675 Speaker 2: probably told her about burying me too, said missus Prebble. 525 00:36:22,195 --> 00:36:27,475 Speaker 2: That's not true, said mister Prebble, with dignity. That's between 526 00:36:27,515 --> 00:36:30,075 Speaker 2: you and me. I was never going to tell a soul. 527 00:36:30,915 --> 00:36:33,595 Speaker 2: You'd blab it to the whole world. Don't tell me, 528 00:36:34,395 --> 00:36:35,275 Speaker 2: said missus Prebble. 529 00:36:35,355 --> 00:36:40,075 Speaker 1: I know you. Mister Prebble puffed at his cigar. I 530 00:36:40,155 --> 00:36:42,155 Speaker 1: wish you were buried now it was all over with, 531 00:36:42,435 --> 00:36:45,675 Speaker 1: he said. Don't you suppose you would get caught, you 532 00:36:45,795 --> 00:36:50,515 Speaker 1: crazy thing? She said, They always get caught. Why don't 533 00:36:50,515 --> 00:36:52,315 Speaker 1: you go to bed. You're just getting yourself all worked 534 00:36:52,395 --> 00:36:55,875 Speaker 1: up over nothing. I'm not going to bed, said mister Prebble. 535 00:36:55,915 --> 00:36:57,795 Speaker 1: I'm going to bury you in the cellar. I got 536 00:36:57,835 --> 00:36:59,675 Speaker 1: my mind made up to it. I don't know how 537 00:36:59,675 --> 00:37:04,635 Speaker 1: I could make any plainer listen, cried missus Prebble, throwing 538 00:37:04,755 --> 00:37:07,475 Speaker 1: her book down. Will you be satisfied and shut up? 539 00:37:07,475 --> 00:37:09,435 Speaker 1: If I go down in the cellar. Can I have 540 00:37:09,435 --> 00:37:11,795 Speaker 1: a little peace if I go down in the cellar, 541 00:37:11,875 --> 00:37:12,875 Speaker 1: Will you let me alone? 542 00:37:12,915 --> 00:37:13,155 Speaker 4: Then? 543 00:37:14,795 --> 00:37:18,755 Speaker 1: Yes, said mister Prebble. But you spoil it by taking 544 00:37:18,795 --> 00:37:23,395 Speaker 1: that attitude. Sure, sure, I always spoil everything. I stop 545 00:37:23,435 --> 00:37:25,515 Speaker 1: reading right in the middle of a chapter. I'll never 546 00:37:25,555 --> 00:37:27,795 Speaker 1: know how the story comes out. But that's nothing to you. 547 00:37:28,515 --> 00:37:31,995 Speaker 1: Did I make you start reading that book, asked mister Prebble. 548 00:37:32,075 --> 00:37:35,675 Speaker 1: He opened the cellar door. Here you go first, said 549 00:37:35,675 --> 00:37:38,795 Speaker 1: missus Prebble, starting down the steps. It's cold down here. 550 00:37:39,155 --> 00:37:41,515 Speaker 1: You would think of this at this time of the year. 551 00:37:42,075 --> 00:37:44,755 Speaker 1: Any other husband would have buried his wife in the summer. 552 00:37:45,635 --> 00:37:48,275 Speaker 1: You can't arrange those things just whenever you want to, 553 00:37:48,315 --> 00:37:50,235 Speaker 1: said mister Prebble. That didn't fall in love with this 554 00:37:50,275 --> 00:37:53,155 Speaker 1: girl till late fall. Anybody else would have fallen in 555 00:37:53,235 --> 00:37:56,675 Speaker 1: love with her long before that. She's been around for years. 556 00:37:56,955 --> 00:37:58,635 Speaker 1: Why is it you always let other men get in 557 00:37:58,675 --> 00:38:01,115 Speaker 1: ahead of you? Mercy? But it's dirty down here. What 558 00:38:01,235 --> 00:38:03,915 Speaker 1: have you got down there? I was going to hit 559 00:38:03,915 --> 00:38:06,235 Speaker 1: you over the head with the sh shovel, said mister Prebble. 560 00:38:06,315 --> 00:38:09,315 Speaker 1: You were huh, said missus Prebble. We'll get that out 561 00:38:09,355 --> 00:38:09,875 Speaker 1: of your mind. 562 00:38:09,995 --> 00:38:12,395 Speaker 2: You want to leave a great, big clue right here 563 00:38:12,435 --> 00:38:14,995 Speaker 2: in the middle of everything. We're the first detective to 564 00:38:14,995 --> 00:38:18,035 Speaker 2: come snooping around. We'll find it. Come out in the 565 00:38:18,035 --> 00:38:20,595 Speaker 2: street and find some piece of iron or something. Something 566 00:38:20,675 --> 00:38:25,875 Speaker 2: doesn't belong to you, all right, said mister Prebble. But 567 00:38:25,915 --> 00:38:28,635 Speaker 2: there won't be any piece of iron in the street. 568 00:38:28,835 --> 00:38:31,675 Speaker 2: Women always expect to pick up a piece of iron anywhere. 569 00:38:32,755 --> 00:38:34,875 Speaker 2: If you look in the right place, you'll find it, 570 00:38:35,235 --> 00:38:38,395 Speaker 2: said missus Prebble. And don't be gone long, don't you 571 00:38:38,475 --> 00:38:40,595 Speaker 2: dare stopping at the cigar store. I'm not going to 572 00:38:40,635 --> 00:38:42,995 Speaker 2: stand down here in this cold cellar all night and freeze, 573 00:38:43,955 --> 00:38:47,795 Speaker 2: all right, said mister Prebble. I'll hurry and shut that 574 00:38:47,995 --> 00:38:50,835 Speaker 2: door behind you. She screamed after him. 575 00:38:50,715 --> 00:38:57,555 Speaker 1: Where were you born in a barn? Mister Preble gets 576 00:38:57,635 --> 00:39:08,755 Speaker 1: rid of his wife By James Thurber. It's been a 577 00:39:08,875 --> 00:39:12,955 Speaker 1: long week. And every time I find myself thinking it's 578 00:39:13,035 --> 00:39:16,355 Speaker 1: been a long week, I like to turn to my 579 00:39:16,435 --> 00:39:19,275 Speaker 1: book of James Thurber, and it's Fridays with Thurber. And 580 00:39:19,315 --> 00:39:21,915 Speaker 1: it's been a few Fridays since I've done any James Thurber. 581 00:39:22,475 --> 00:39:25,075 Speaker 1: And so let's start at the beginning. As I've mentioned 582 00:39:25,115 --> 00:39:27,915 Speaker 1: many times, I read this story first aloud in a 583 00:39:27,995 --> 00:39:30,955 Speaker 1: class in college in nineteen seventy nine, and a friend 584 00:39:30,955 --> 00:39:32,435 Speaker 1: of mine came up to me and said, you should 585 00:39:32,435 --> 00:39:35,875 Speaker 1: forget that sportscasting thing. You should read Thurber for a living, 586 00:39:36,715 --> 00:39:40,355 Speaker 1: And I said, yeah, that'll ever happen. This is for 587 00:39:40,435 --> 00:39:45,475 Speaker 1: some reason salvation for me, Catharsis, and every other emotion 588 00:39:45,595 --> 00:39:49,035 Speaker 1: that is appropriate after it has been a long week. 589 00:39:51,475 --> 00:39:58,115 Speaker 1: A Box to Hide In by James Thurber. I waited 590 00:39:58,955 --> 00:40:03,195 Speaker 1: till the large woman with the awful hat took up 591 00:40:03,275 --> 00:40:07,475 Speaker 1: her sack of groceries and went out, peering at the 592 00:40:07,555 --> 00:40:11,595 Speaker 1: tomatoes and the lettuce on her way. The clerk asked 593 00:40:11,595 --> 00:40:16,275 Speaker 1: me what mine was. Have you got a box, I asked, 594 00:40:16,675 --> 00:40:20,595 Speaker 1: A large box. I want a box to hide in. 595 00:40:22,115 --> 00:40:25,795 Speaker 1: You want a box, he asked, I want a box 596 00:40:25,835 --> 00:40:28,675 Speaker 1: to hide in. I said, what do you mean? He said, 597 00:40:28,755 --> 00:40:31,835 Speaker 1: you mean a big box? I said, I meant a 598 00:40:31,955 --> 00:40:34,795 Speaker 1: big box big enough to hold me. I haven't got 599 00:40:34,795 --> 00:40:38,195 Speaker 1: any boxes, he said, only cottons that cans come in. 600 00:40:40,195 --> 00:40:42,755 Speaker 1: I tried several other groceries and none of them had 601 00:40:42,795 --> 00:40:45,555 Speaker 1: a box big enough for me to hide in. And 602 00:40:45,635 --> 00:40:49,635 Speaker 1: there was nothing for it but to face life out. 603 00:40:50,355 --> 00:40:53,875 Speaker 1: I didn't feel strong, and I'd had this overpowering desire 604 00:40:53,955 --> 00:40:57,875 Speaker 1: to hide in a box for a long time. 605 00:40:59,995 --> 00:41:01,275 Speaker 2: Well, what do you mean you want to hide in 606 00:41:01,355 --> 00:41:06,995 Speaker 2: this box? One grocer asked me. It's a form of escape. 607 00:41:07,155 --> 00:41:11,035 Speaker 2: I told him, hiding in a box it circumscribes your 608 00:41:11,075 --> 00:41:15,675 Speaker 2: worries and the range of your anguish. You don't see 609 00:41:15,715 --> 00:41:18,835 Speaker 2: people either. How the hell do you eat when you're 610 00:41:18,835 --> 00:41:21,315 Speaker 2: in this box? Asked the grocer, How the hell do 611 00:41:21,315 --> 00:41:24,435 Speaker 2: you get anything to eat? I said I had never 612 00:41:24,475 --> 00:41:26,475 Speaker 2: been in a box and didn't know, but that that 613 00:41:26,555 --> 00:41:30,595 Speaker 2: would take care of itself. Well, he said, finally, I 614 00:41:30,635 --> 00:41:34,435 Speaker 2: haven't got any boxes, only some pasteboard curtains that cans 615 00:41:34,435 --> 00:41:40,115 Speaker 2: come in. It was the same every place. I gave 616 00:41:40,195 --> 00:41:43,155 Speaker 2: up when it got dark and the groceries closed, and 617 00:41:43,275 --> 00:41:46,435 Speaker 2: hid in my room again. I turned out the light 618 00:41:46,515 --> 00:41:49,475 Speaker 2: and lay on the bed. You feel better when it 619 00:41:49,515 --> 00:41:53,515 Speaker 2: gets dark. I could have hit in a closet, I suppose, 620 00:41:53,635 --> 00:41:59,195 Speaker 2: but people are always opening doors. Somebody would find you 621 00:41:59,235 --> 00:42:02,315 Speaker 2: in a closet. They would be startled, and you'd have 622 00:42:02,355 --> 00:42:05,475 Speaker 2: to tell them why you're in the closet. Nobody pays 623 00:42:05,515 --> 00:42:08,635 Speaker 2: attention to a big box lying on the floor. You 624 00:42:08,715 --> 00:42:12,955 Speaker 2: could stay in it for days and nobody'd think to 625 00:42:13,115 --> 00:42:20,195 Speaker 2: look in it, not even the cleaning woman. My cleaning 626 00:42:20,235 --> 00:42:22,675 Speaker 2: woman came the next morning and woke me up, and 627 00:42:22,795 --> 00:42:25,635 Speaker 2: I was still feeling bad. I asked her if she 628 00:42:25,755 --> 00:42:28,835 Speaker 2: knew where I could get a large box. How big 629 00:42:28,875 --> 00:42:32,675 Speaker 2: a box you want, she asked, I want a box 630 00:42:32,715 --> 00:42:34,955 Speaker 2: big enough for me to get inside of, I said. 631 00:42:36,035 --> 00:42:40,435 Speaker 2: She looked at me with big, dim eyes. There's something 632 00:42:40,475 --> 00:42:44,355 Speaker 2: wrong with her glands. She's awful, but she has a 633 00:42:44,355 --> 00:42:49,115 Speaker 2: big heart, which makes it worse. She's unbearable. Her husband 634 00:42:49,155 --> 00:42:51,475 Speaker 2: is sick, and her children are sick, and she is 635 00:42:51,555 --> 00:42:53,955 Speaker 2: sick too. I got to thinking how pleasant it would 636 00:42:53,995 --> 00:42:55,915 Speaker 2: be if I were in a box now and didn't 637 00:42:55,955 --> 00:42:58,235 Speaker 2: have to see her. I'd bet a box right there 638 00:42:58,235 --> 00:43:00,395 Speaker 2: in the room and she wouldn't know. I wondered, if 639 00:43:00,435 --> 00:43:04,275 Speaker 2: you had a desire to bark or laugh when someone 640 00:43:04,275 --> 00:43:07,555 Speaker 2: who does no walks by the box you were in, 641 00:43:09,475 --> 00:43:11,835 Speaker 2: maybe she would have a spell with her heart. If 642 00:43:11,875 --> 00:43:16,315 Speaker 2: I did, that would die right there. The officers and 643 00:43:16,355 --> 00:43:19,955 Speaker 2: the elevator man and mister Grammage would find us funny, 644 00:43:19,995 --> 00:43:22,755 Speaker 2: dog Gune, thing happened at the building last night. The 645 00:43:22,795 --> 00:43:24,915 Speaker 2: doorman would say to his wife, I led in this 646 00:43:24,995 --> 00:43:26,995 Speaker 2: woman to clean up tenf and she never come out. 647 00:43:27,075 --> 00:43:29,435 Speaker 2: See she's never in there more in an hour, but 648 00:43:29,475 --> 00:43:30,195 Speaker 2: she never come out. 649 00:43:30,235 --> 00:43:32,595 Speaker 1: See. So when it got time for me to go 650 00:43:32,635 --> 00:43:34,435 Speaker 1: off duty, why, I says to credit who was on 651 00:43:34,475 --> 00:43:36,475 Speaker 1: the elevator. I says, what the hell you suppose this 652 00:43:36,515 --> 00:43:39,755 Speaker 1: happened to that woman cleans tenf? He says he didn't know. 653 00:43:40,235 --> 00:43:42,195 Speaker 1: He says he never seen her after he took her up. 654 00:43:42,595 --> 00:43:45,875 Speaker 1: So I spoke to mister Grammage about it. I'm sorry 655 00:43:45,875 --> 00:43:49,195 Speaker 1: to bother you, mister Grammage, I says, but there's something funny. 656 00:43:49,275 --> 00:43:52,915 Speaker 1: But that woman cleans tenf. So I told him so 657 00:43:52,995 --> 00:43:54,635 Speaker 1: he said we better have a look, and we all 658 00:43:54,635 --> 00:43:56,755 Speaker 1: three goes up and knuts on the door and rings 659 00:43:56,795 --> 00:43:59,635 Speaker 1: the bells sea and nobody answers. So he said we'd 660 00:43:59,675 --> 00:44:01,635 Speaker 1: have to walk in. So credit opened the door and 661 00:44:01,675 --> 00:44:05,235 Speaker 1: we walked in, and here was this woman cleans the apartment, 662 00:44:05,915 --> 00:44:10,635 Speaker 1: dead as a herring on the floor, and the gentleman 663 00:44:10,715 --> 00:44:17,755 Speaker 1: that lives there was in a box. The cleaning woman 664 00:44:17,835 --> 00:44:20,995 Speaker 1: kept looking at me. It was hard to realize she 665 00:44:21,275 --> 00:44:28,635 Speaker 1: wasn't dead. It's a form of escape, I murmured, wat say, 666 00:44:29,715 --> 00:44:34,475 Speaker 1: She asked, Dully, you don't know of any large packing boxes, 667 00:44:34,515 --> 00:44:40,555 Speaker 1: do you? I asked, now, I don't. She said, I 668 00:44:40,595 --> 00:44:44,075 Speaker 1: haven't found one yet, But I still have this overpowering 669 00:44:44,275 --> 00:44:49,035 Speaker 1: urge to hide in a box. Maybe it will go away, 670 00:44:49,955 --> 00:44:53,675 Speaker 1: maybe I'll be all right, maybe it will get worse. 671 00:44:55,275 --> 00:45:01,595 Speaker 1: It's hard to say A box to hide in. By 672 00:45:01,715 --> 00:45:18,195 Speaker 1: James Thurber, I've got all the damage I can do here. 673 00:45:18,235 --> 00:45:20,435 Speaker 1: Thank you for listening. Countdown has come to you from 674 00:45:20,475 --> 00:45:25,155 Speaker 1: the Vin Scully Studios at the Olderman Broadcasting Empire World 675 00:45:25,195 --> 00:45:29,635 Speaker 1: headquarters in New York Downtown. Musical directors Brian Ray and 676 00:45:29,715 --> 00:45:33,035 Speaker 1: John Phillip Shanelle arranged, produced, and performed most of our music, 677 00:45:33,475 --> 00:45:36,435 Speaker 1: mister Shanelle handling the orchestration in keyboards, mister Ray on 678 00:45:36,475 --> 00:45:38,915 Speaker 1: the guitars, bass and drums, and it was produced by 679 00:45:38,955 --> 00:45:42,875 Speaker 1: Tko Brothers. Other music, including some of the Beethoven compositions, 680 00:45:43,075 --> 00:45:45,795 Speaker 1: were arranged and performed by the group No Horns Allowed. 681 00:45:46,195 --> 00:45:49,915 Speaker 1: Sports music Curtesy of ESPN, Inc. Written by Mitch Warren Davis. 682 00:45:49,915 --> 00:45:52,595 Speaker 1: We call it the Olderman theme from ESPN two. Our 683 00:45:52,715 --> 00:45:56,195 Speaker 1: satirical and pithy musical comments are by Nancy Fauss, the 684 00:45:56,195 --> 00:45:59,395 Speaker 1: best baseball stadium organist ever. So that's countdown for this 685 00:45:59,395 --> 00:46:03,035 Speaker 1: one and sixty seventh day since dementia, Jay Trump's first 686 00:46:03,035 --> 00:46:06,075 Speaker 1: attempted coup against the democratically government in the United States 687 00:46:06,395 --> 00:46:09,875 Speaker 1: use the Insurrection Act against him and them while we 688 00:46:09,955 --> 00:46:13,715 Speaker 1: still can. The next schedule Countdown is Tuesday. Bulletins as 689 00:46:13,755 --> 00:46:17,635 Speaker 1: the news warrants and my eyeballs permit. Till then, I'm 690 00:46:17,835 --> 00:46:23,075 Speaker 1: scintillating Scatoma. Good morning, good afternoon, good night, and good luck. 691 00:46:29,795 --> 00:46:33,755 Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olreman is a production of iHeartRadio. For 692 00:46:33,915 --> 00:46:38,835 Speaker 1: more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 693 00:46:39,115 --> 00:46:41,075 Speaker 1: or wherever you get your podcasts.