WEBVTT - How Angry Are You? (Mild, Medium, or Hot) + Things That Defeat ADHD Brains & More 0:00:02.440 --> 0:00:04.680 Good. All right, break it down. 0:00:05.320 --> 0:00:08.680 If you ever have feelings that you just won'ts ay 0:00:08.840 --> 0:00:12.480 and Cat got your cob and locking a brother Lady's 0:00:12.480 --> 0:00:15.200 and felts do you just follow in the spirit where 0:00:15.240 --> 0:00:18.400 it's all the front over real stuff to the chill 0:00:18.480 --> 0:00:19.479 stuff and the. 0:00:19.760 --> 0:00:23.200 M but Swayne, sometimes the best thing you can do 0:00:23.280 --> 0:00:23.760 it just. 0:00:23.680 --> 0:00:28.920 Stop you feel things. This is feeling things with Amy 0:00:28.960 --> 0:00:29.320 and Cat. 0:00:29.400 --> 0:00:32.280 Happy Tuesday. Welcome to feeling things. I'm Amy, I'm Cat 0:00:32.600 --> 0:00:34.120 and out of the gate. We got the feeling of 0:00:34.159 --> 0:00:36.880 the day. Yeah, and I'm smiling as I say this 0:00:37.000 --> 0:00:40.279 feels weird. The feeling of the day, which I've sort 0:00:40.280 --> 0:00:46.239 of gotten over, is anger, because you're I woke up angry. 0:00:46.479 --> 0:00:49.159 Yeah, okay, what kind of anger? 0:00:49.840 --> 0:00:53.440 I don't know what? Like are there different types of anger? 0:00:53.520 --> 0:00:55.560 I mean, I guess I know that there's different feelings 0:00:55.600 --> 0:00:57.279 involved in that, but like anger is the one I'm 0:00:57.320 --> 0:01:00.120 touching on. Like it's like a spectrum, Like, yeah, what 0:01:00.280 --> 0:01:03.800 level of anger? Okay, let's do it like salsa? Like 0:01:03.800 --> 0:01:06.360 am I mild salsa? Or am I medium? 0:01:06.959 --> 0:01:08.240 I'm hot? Okay? 0:01:08.240 --> 0:01:09.319 It's like what would mild be. 0:01:10.319 --> 0:01:12.280 Like frustrated, annoyed? 0:01:13.080 --> 0:01:15.240 Okay, Yeah, I'm not so, I'm for sure mild. 0:01:15.280 --> 0:01:20.760 Okay, what's medium? Mad, upset, pissed off? 0:01:21.280 --> 0:01:23.679 Oh I don't like the feet word. You don't like 0:01:23.720 --> 0:01:26.039 that now, so that's fine, we'll roll with it. I'm 0:01:26.080 --> 0:01:30.840 definitely medium Okay, so so far Okay, now hot hot salsa. 0:01:31.360 --> 0:01:35.240 That would be like enraged or I mean, there could 0:01:35.240 --> 0:01:37.360 be a little actual rage in there. 0:01:38.000 --> 0:01:42.480 I don't feel like I'm raging furious. I'm furious. I'm 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:47.280 like so frustrated and makes me furious. I'm perplexed. You know, 0:01:47.360 --> 0:01:50.080 we're just like feeling I'm confused and that leads to anger, 0:01:50.920 --> 0:01:52.160 Like I'm just frustrated? 0:01:52.200 --> 0:01:52.480 Am I? 0:01:52.560 --> 0:01:55.280 All of these salas A my mild medium hot, which 0:01:55.280 --> 0:01:56.120 would mean I'm hot? 0:01:57.080 --> 0:01:59.160 Yeah, well you you're you have a you have a 0:01:59.280 --> 0:02:02.480 mild feeling, but to the hot level. 0:02:02.880 --> 0:02:03.600 Does that make sense? 0:02:03.680 --> 0:02:04.280 Yeah? 0:02:04.440 --> 0:02:05.320 So it's like like. 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:08.040 On the spectrum of frustrated euro up here. Yeah. 0:02:08.320 --> 0:02:11.720 I just woke up with this. I couldn't shake it. 0:02:12.240 --> 0:02:16.600 So I busted out a coping tool, which would be journaling, 0:02:17.440 --> 0:02:19.800 and I journaled for twelve minutes. 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:20.680 Did you time it? 0:02:21.160 --> 0:02:21.359 Yeah? 0:02:21.400 --> 0:02:24.359 Because I started journaling it and then twelve minutes later 0:02:24.400 --> 0:02:25.160 I was done. 0:02:25.480 --> 0:02:27.360 I don't know if you said a timer for twelve. 0:02:27.520 --> 0:02:29.919 I didn't actually set a timer, but like the clock, 0:02:30.120 --> 0:02:31.760 I knew what time was when I started, and I 0:02:31.800 --> 0:02:34.400 was like, oh wow, I just wrote for twelve straight minutes. 0:02:34.480 --> 0:02:35.920 Were you like scribbling? 0:02:35.960 --> 0:02:38.280 I tried to write as fast as possible because that's 0:02:38.400 --> 0:02:41.160 just very That's what's therapeutic for me, especially if I'm 0:02:41.360 --> 0:02:43.520 dumping things out and I just like let it flow. 0:02:43.560 --> 0:02:46.480 Like whatever was coming to my brain, I wrote it. 0:02:46.480 --> 0:02:48.920 It'd be actually be interesting now that I've gone the 0:02:49.000 --> 0:02:51.040 day and I'm a little more calm if I read 0:02:51.040 --> 0:02:53.720 what I wrote this morning, because I know that I 0:02:53.760 --> 0:02:56.640 was dumping a lot within that twelve minutes. I know 0:02:56.720 --> 0:02:58.680 that there's things I wrote down I wouldn't recognize. 0:02:59.440 --> 0:03:02.320 Now, Wow, you don't think. 0:03:02.720 --> 0:03:04.600 I think that there's sentences where I'd be like, huh, 0:03:04.600 --> 0:03:08.760 I read that. Yeah, I think that was very helpful 0:03:08.760 --> 0:03:12.880 for me. It helped me like lay out my thoughts 0:03:13.560 --> 0:03:16.800 and continue on with my morning with ease, because I 0:03:16.840 --> 0:03:20.800 didn't like waking up with that feeling. And then I 0:03:20.840 --> 0:03:24.720 sent you a text after at some point in the morning. 0:03:24.720 --> 0:03:28.799 I know that I texted you and you replied with this, 0:03:30.320 --> 0:03:35.480 You can do this. They suck. That's how I read it. 0:03:36.560 --> 0:03:39.720 You can do it. Is that a movie quote? 0:03:40.000 --> 0:03:43.160 Yes, isn't that from water Boy? 0:03:41.960 --> 0:03:42.160 Yeah? 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:44.920 Okay, so that's how I read it. 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:46.240 You can do this. 0:03:47.400 --> 0:03:51.040 You can do this. They suck. You're a beautiful sunflower 0:03:51.280 --> 0:03:54.280 and they're an ugly weed that thinks they're a flower, 0:03:54.320 --> 0:03:56.960 but really they just kill everything around them. And I 0:03:57.040 --> 0:04:00.400 was like, oh my gosh, that's true. 0:04:00.560 --> 0:04:01.400 It was helpful. 0:04:02.080 --> 0:04:07.440 It was helpful because it just helps me understand the 0:04:07.480 --> 0:04:11.720 boundary I need, which is the gift of anger. So 0:04:12.200 --> 0:04:15.280 which when we started this podcast, we started with all 0:04:15.400 --> 0:04:17.480 the coreat feelings, and we know that one of the 0:04:17.520 --> 0:04:21.799 gifts of anger is perspective. It's information, and it helps 0:04:21.880 --> 0:04:25.600 us know where we need to have some boundaries and 0:04:25.720 --> 0:04:27.560 what we need to do. And so I was like, 0:04:28.480 --> 0:04:29.000 not mistake. 0:04:29.839 --> 0:04:32.520 And I think because anger is a justice emotion and 0:04:32.560 --> 0:04:35.719 it shows us like how to care for ourselves well 0:04:35.760 --> 0:04:38.240 and care for others well, it could be helpful to 0:04:38.279 --> 0:04:40.400 feel that because that means that you care about yourself. 0:04:40.440 --> 0:04:43.200 You're like this, I deserve to be treated better depending 0:04:43.240 --> 0:04:43.799 on the situation. 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:47.840 My inner alarm was going off, like saying hot, hot, 0:04:49.000 --> 0:04:56.159 seek get the gualk chips, some more chips. Like that's 0:04:56.160 --> 0:05:01.640 how I feel like randomly have a salsa analogy to 0:05:01.680 --> 0:05:05.080 gauge our anger. Yeah, which I love now that. Yes, listeners, 0:05:05.640 --> 0:05:08.320 next time they're either eating salsa, they're gonna think, am 0:05:08.320 --> 0:05:11.400 I angry about anything? Or next time they're angry, they're 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:15.120 gonna start craving chips and salsa because we've like put 0:05:15.160 --> 0:05:15.760 this in their mind. 0:05:15.800 --> 0:05:16.840 Salsa is my anger. 0:05:17.000 --> 0:05:19.599 Yeah, and then you'll be like maybe the remedies you 0:05:19.640 --> 0:05:22.240 go eat that salsa. Be like, I'm hot right now, 0:05:22.279 --> 0:05:24.400 so I'm gonna make myself eat hot, which I never 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:27.119 buy hot, by the way, I always buy mild or medium. 0:05:27.320 --> 0:05:29.640 I like mild. I don't like spice. 0:05:29.880 --> 0:05:32.440 I don't get people who really like spicy food. But 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:34.280 then you can't really even taste it because your mouth 0:05:34.360 --> 0:05:35.080 is so hot. 0:05:35.640 --> 0:05:38.640 Yeah, and then you keep eating just to get rid 0:05:38.680 --> 0:05:40.440 of the hot. It keeps adding to the hot. 0:05:40.560 --> 0:05:42.000 Yes, I don't get that. 0:05:42.240 --> 0:05:46.760 I know that's your wedding. Yeah, I know, but sometimes 0:05:46.800 --> 0:05:48.040 it's just really good. 0:05:48.320 --> 0:05:51.520 It's like almost a little bit of like self harmy. 0:05:51.680 --> 0:05:53.240 Do you know you may not know this about me, 0:05:53.240 --> 0:05:54.479 because I don't know if you ever listen to this 0:05:54.520 --> 0:05:56.320 on the Bobby Bone Show. But that one time I 0:05:56.440 --> 0:05:58.039 lost a bet and I had to take the hottest 0:05:58.040 --> 0:05:59.640 shot in the world, and I almost died. You told 0:05:59.640 --> 0:06:01.280 me this, Okay, I don't know if I ever. 0:06:01.560 --> 0:06:04.800 Wasn't it like you to eat the pep? 0:06:05.040 --> 0:06:08.440 You do know it was a It was an alcoholic shot, 0:06:08.520 --> 0:06:10.159 like I don't know if it was tequila or what 0:06:10.200 --> 0:06:14.960 the actual alcohol was, but it was labeled the hottest 0:06:14.960 --> 0:06:16.960 shot in the world, and we ordered it off the internet. 0:06:17.000 --> 0:06:18.960 Who knows if it was safe or not. And none 0:06:19.000 --> 0:06:21.040 of us were prepared for what was about to happen, 0:06:21.120 --> 0:06:24.279 like and none of us throw up. I did not 0:06:24.320 --> 0:06:25.840 go to the hospital. I thought I was going to 0:06:25.920 --> 0:06:27.640 need to go to the hospital, but I did not 0:06:27.720 --> 0:06:29.960 throw Oh I did throw up, But the problem was 0:06:30.000 --> 0:06:31.600 when I started throwing up, it was coming out of 0:06:31.640 --> 0:06:34.040 my throat and out of my nose, and so then 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:36.680 the then my face was burning. So it was like 0:06:36.680 --> 0:06:38.919 a chemical peel on my face because it was coming 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:41.640 out of my mouth and my nose, and my eyes 0:06:41.640 --> 0:06:44.120 were watering and I had goosebumps and chills. 0:06:44.120 --> 0:06:48.440 Like, what was the remedy for this time? You didn't 0:06:48.480 --> 0:06:49.120 like drink milk. 0:06:49.520 --> 0:06:51.320 They had to go get milk. See, they didn't even 0:06:51.400 --> 0:06:53.800 have that, so we weren't prepared. I wasn't either. I 0:06:53.839 --> 0:06:55.200 just thought, Okay, I'm gonna take the shot and it's 0:06:55.200 --> 0:06:57.560 gonna be hot and then we're gonna move on. Well, 0:06:57.880 --> 0:07:01.120 I took the shot and then it hit me, and 0:07:01.160 --> 0:07:04.279 what hit me was I might need to go to 0:07:04.320 --> 0:07:06.600 the hospital. What I was feeling were things I have 0:07:06.720 --> 0:07:09.760 never felt in my body before. And then I had goosebumps. 0:07:09.760 --> 0:07:13.000 Then I was in the bathroom. Then my face was burning. 0:07:13.320 --> 0:07:15.600 Then they finally brought me milk. I was chugging it, 0:07:15.680 --> 0:07:17.520 pouring it all over my face, trying to get it 0:07:17.520 --> 0:07:21.280 to calm down. Then I'm like on my like hands 0:07:21.320 --> 0:07:24.920 and knees over a trash can and then I mean 0:07:24.960 --> 0:07:26.240 I was out the rest of the show, like I 0:07:26.240 --> 0:07:29.000 never Sully. But Bobby was like, yeah, I definitely thought 0:07:29.000 --> 0:07:30.440 we were all going to get fired that day because 0:07:30.480 --> 0:07:33.800 like I was gonna die, that would be bad. Worst 0:07:33.800 --> 0:07:37.560 case scenario would be death. But he just thought we 0:07:37.560 --> 0:07:39.360 were gonna be in some serious trouble because our boss 0:07:39.400 --> 0:07:40.800 is gonna be like, what the heck, you can't do 0:07:40.840 --> 0:07:43.840 stuff like that? Yeah, you put her in danger. 0:07:43.560 --> 0:07:44.800 Get the day off the next day. 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:46.840 No, I think I'm a champ, and I went back 0:07:46.880 --> 0:07:50.440 to work. But anyway, I wasn't that level of angry. 0:07:50.440 --> 0:07:52.320 At least we know that I wasn't hottest shot in 0:07:52.320 --> 0:07:53.360 the world for a second. 0:07:53.800 --> 0:07:57.080 This is my question to that, Why are they making that? 0:07:57.200 --> 0:08:00.080 Because that means nobody can drink that and enjoy it. 0:08:00.520 --> 0:08:02.800 Who's buying and other than people who are pranking people, 0:08:02.800 --> 0:08:03.840 which that should be illegal. 0:08:04.000 --> 0:08:05.800 Well, it's not just a prank. It's also like I 0:08:05.840 --> 0:08:07.840 want to take the hottest shot in the world. Like 0:08:07.920 --> 0:08:09.840 I knew what I was doing. I wasn't mean, I 0:08:09.880 --> 0:08:13.040 wasn't meaning pranked, but I guess what the people that 0:08:13.080 --> 0:08:14.520 are idiots like us? 0:08:15.040 --> 0:08:17.520 Okay, okay, that's who they're marketing to. 0:08:17.600 --> 0:08:19.240 Feel like they have the hottest chip in the world 0:08:19.360 --> 0:08:19.720 they have. 0:08:19.960 --> 0:08:23.640 Like why, I just don't get that, like I'm novelty. Yeah, 0:08:23.680 --> 0:08:25.840 but how much could be making off of that? How 0:08:25.880 --> 0:08:27.000 many people are buying that? 0:08:27.120 --> 0:08:28.640 I don't know I've met. 0:08:28.640 --> 0:08:30.520 They're out of business, you know who some of those 0:08:30.960 --> 0:08:33.160 only fans people or supermodel people. I don't know who 0:08:33.160 --> 0:08:36.520 they are, but they'll be like I put my breath 0:08:36.520 --> 0:08:39.679 into a bottle and they sell it for money, or 0:08:39.760 --> 0:08:42.400 they or they pass gas in a bottle and they 0:08:42.440 --> 0:08:46.360 sell it, and they sell it you know, like yeah, 0:08:46.520 --> 0:08:47.960 people are making money. 0:08:47.679 --> 0:08:49.760 And the most like a little different than. 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:52.240 Well, I know. It just made me think of bottling 0:08:52.240 --> 0:08:54.400 things up and selling it and making money, like if 0:08:54.480 --> 0:08:57.000 we could, Like I feel like, like, are we missing 0:08:57.000 --> 0:08:58.280 out an opportunity here? 0:08:58.960 --> 0:09:00.480 Do you want to pass gas and a bottle and 0:09:00.559 --> 0:09:03.920 start selling them in bulk? Is there a market for that? 0:09:04.440 --> 0:09:04.520 No? 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:06.080 I don't want to think about that, Like that's why. 0:09:06.040 --> 0:09:09.880 I mean, first, that's an easy one. I know. Yes, 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:12.160 are we missing out on an opportunity one hundred percent? 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:14.120 Because we could probably. 0:09:13.920 --> 0:09:17.319 Or like air from wherever or my or my baths 0:09:17.360 --> 0:09:20.720 like Sidney Sweeney just soap out of her bath water. 0:09:21.840 --> 0:09:25.040 Yeah, why why don't we Well, I don't know anybody's 0:09:25.040 --> 0:09:26.920 buying my bath water personally. 0:09:26.520 --> 0:09:31.360 But feeling things merch coming soon, people. 0:09:31.160 --> 0:09:33.600 Are so excited and then it's like soap from our 0:09:33.640 --> 0:09:37.240 like dirty bathwater, our dishes, oh dishes. It could have 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:39.600 to be because I don't I can't take a bath, 0:09:40.320 --> 0:09:40.920 so I can't. 0:09:40.679 --> 0:09:41.439 Sell my bath water. 0:09:41.720 --> 0:09:42.520 I love a good bath. 0:09:43.320 --> 0:09:45.959 I don't like sitting in dirty water, but. 0:09:45.960 --> 0:09:48.520 I shower before you shower before you take a bath. 0:09:48.920 --> 0:09:52.120 But then you're sitting where you're dirty feet were. I 0:09:52.200 --> 0:09:54.000 just don't like it. I've accepted that it's probably just 0:09:54.040 --> 0:09:54.360 not for me. 0:09:54.400 --> 0:09:58.319 It's not your thing. Yeah, okay, Well back to the anger. 0:09:58.800 --> 0:10:00.319 We went over the gift and I I just want 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:02.240 to remind people of the impairment if you don't feel it, 0:10:02.280 --> 0:10:04.480 Because if I had woken up feeling angry and I 0:10:04.640 --> 0:10:06.920 just sort of suppressed it and didn't journal through it 0:10:06.960 --> 0:10:09.679 and then text a friend about it and get affirmation 0:10:09.840 --> 0:10:15.600 that I'm a beautiful sunflower and the other for a 0:10:15.600 --> 0:10:19.560 sense of weed. If you don't feel it, when you 0:10:19.559 --> 0:10:23.959 suppress anger, it doesn't disappear. It's still there, and then 0:10:24.000 --> 0:10:27.920 it can turn into resentment. It can turn into really 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:30.320 passive aggressive behavior, which we don't want to be that way. 0:10:31.320 --> 0:10:33.679 To think about the feeling that's energy. It's going to 0:10:33.720 --> 0:10:36.199 find a way to come out one way or the other. 0:10:36.280 --> 0:10:38.520 You might as well use it in a way that's 0:10:38.520 --> 0:10:39.199 helpful for you. 0:10:39.280 --> 0:10:41.360 And it can get you feeling really down, and you 0:10:41.360 --> 0:10:44.840 don't want to feel down, and then unfelt anger go 0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:48.040 sideways real quick. It's sort of like that shot, you know, 0:10:48.280 --> 0:10:48.640 and then. 0:10:48.559 --> 0:10:55.480 You're unfelt anger as much like a Carolina Reaper pepper shot. 0:10:55.800 --> 0:10:59.440 Yes, and you'll end up burns your nostrils in a 0:10:59.480 --> 0:11:04.600 trash can and vomiting for face on fire. And that's 0:11:04.640 --> 0:11:07.319 just really like, it's an unhealthy situation. And that's what 0:11:07.480 --> 0:11:10.760 I'm like, you know what, and dealt with anger? 0:11:10.960 --> 0:11:11.640 What that does? 0:11:11.840 --> 0:11:14.720 It turns pain, which sometimes feeling anger can be painful 0:11:14.960 --> 0:11:17.760 into suffering suffering. There's a difference thing a man, you 0:11:17.760 --> 0:11:18.920 were suffering, it sounds like. 0:11:18.920 --> 0:11:22.320 Yeah, and so like why suffer? Just go ahead and 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:26.320 feel the anger, lean into it. And that's what I did, 0:11:26.559 --> 0:11:30.480 and I feel better now. It's so much so that 0:11:30.520 --> 0:11:32.440 I really need to go back and see what I journaled. Yeah, 0:11:32.440 --> 0:11:34.679 I want to interesting And what I realized too when 0:11:34.679 --> 0:11:36.480 I looked at the dates of my journal I hadn't 0:11:36.520 --> 0:11:38.560 journaled in a while, and I was like, whoa, I 0:11:38.600 --> 0:11:41.000 need to get back into this because it did for me. 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:44.000 It felt good. And that's why it's always important to. 0:11:44.120 --> 0:11:45.319 The date with the dates. 0:11:45.400 --> 0:11:47.840 You know you're good at that, you're good at journaling, 0:11:48.120 --> 0:11:49.960 which a lot, but I haven't been. 0:11:50.080 --> 0:11:53.880 But I like, what has life been good. Is it like, 0:11:54.040 --> 0:11:56.400 do I only want to journal when things are a 0:11:56.440 --> 0:11:59.480 little more confusing, because I I'd rather I also want 0:11:59.520 --> 0:12:00.920 a journal on the good days. 0:12:01.280 --> 0:12:02.839 Yeah, I was just. 0:12:03.040 --> 0:12:05.360 Don't forget if anybody finds my journals when I die, 0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:06.000 burn that. 0:12:06.080 --> 0:12:08.760 That's only if you're writing down all your affirmations. 0:12:09.160 --> 0:12:11.280 But what I wrote this morning, we need to burn 0:12:11.320 --> 0:12:13.880 it twelve minutes of. 0:12:15.679 --> 0:12:19.120 Well, speaking of feelings, I was feeling I had a 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:24.280 lot of anxiety, let's say, not anger, so fear, a 0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:28.560 lot of stuff happening. And I saw this TikTok of 0:12:28.600 --> 0:12:33.800 this girl who was making a necklace much like the 0:12:33.800 --> 0:12:35.800 one that is hanging around your neck. 0:12:37.160 --> 0:12:38.400 That is a dude, Oh me. 0:12:38.600 --> 0:12:39.920 My original katvan Buren. 0:12:40.080 --> 0:12:43.600 Yeah, okay, yeah, can we get a zoom in on 0:12:43.640 --> 0:12:44.200 the necklace? 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:45.040 Beautiful? 0:12:45.600 --> 0:12:51.440 Yeah? Okay, well just imagine. But I saw this TikTok 0:12:51.520 --> 0:12:53.560 TikTok of this girl. We can't we can't get a 0:12:53.600 --> 0:12:54.160 zoom in on this. 0:12:54.720 --> 0:12:55.959 Oh, I mean it's like a zoom but. 0:12:56.280 --> 0:13:03.320 I could I get closer to the camera. Well, I 0:13:03.320 --> 0:13:06.760 saw this video of a girl who had made this necklace. 0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:09.480 It's a doop of the anthro ones, which I think 0:13:09.520 --> 0:13:12.120 they have a lot of places, but on anthropology they 0:13:12.120 --> 0:13:15.000 sell them for a high sticker item. 0:13:14.640 --> 0:13:17.040 Sticker price, sticker price sticker price. 0:13:17.840 --> 0:13:20.400 Anyway, so I was feeling anxious, and one thing I 0:13:20.400 --> 0:13:24.280 have learned is that for me, being creative is the 0:13:24.520 --> 0:13:27.720 antithesis of anxiety. For me, I think for a lot 0:13:27.720 --> 0:13:30.959 of people, it gets set energy out. Whis why I've 0:13:30.960 --> 0:13:36.680 gone through the hobbies, including painting manicures. Actually, don't zoom 0:13:36.679 --> 0:13:37.199 it on this one. 0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:39.520 I broke an nail. What else have I recently? 0:13:39.559 --> 0:13:45.160 Pottery, air dry and ceramic puzzles, puzzles. I almost got 0:13:45.200 --> 0:13:49.320 into airbrush t shirts, but I didn't. So anyway, I 0:13:49.360 --> 0:13:51.160 went and I got all the supplies to make these 0:13:51.280 --> 0:13:54.240 and it I literally sat in my kitchen table from 0:13:54.320 --> 0:13:57.880 probably nine am to three. 0:13:58.480 --> 0:14:00.800 It was obviously that you didn't have any clients, let's 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:03.040 hope no clients. 0:14:03.200 --> 0:14:05.840 I did have things that needed to get done, right, 0:14:05.880 --> 0:14:09.720 but I think my brain was so discombobulated that I 0:14:09.800 --> 0:14:13.040 just needed an outlet to be able to just create something. Anyway, 0:14:13.080 --> 0:14:15.280 So now I have these beautiful necklaces that I'm giving 0:14:15.280 --> 0:14:15.960 away to everybody. 0:14:16.080 --> 0:14:19.200 You have lots, but I am requesting one of your 0:14:19.240 --> 0:14:21.560 little teeny tiny beaded ones like this one's great and 0:14:21.600 --> 0:14:24.040 I love it, but I really want a multicolored teeny 0:14:24.040 --> 0:14:24.800 tiny one please. 0:14:25.040 --> 0:14:27.840 So you like that one, but you mildly like that one, 0:14:27.840 --> 0:14:30.320 and you spicy hot salsa like the other one. 0:14:30.400 --> 0:14:34.360 Yeah, okay, Like everything we do now is like related 0:14:34.360 --> 0:14:37.400 to salsa, which honestly does sound really good. Now, Like 0:14:37.440 --> 0:14:40.360 I could really go for some like a trio. 0:14:41.000 --> 0:14:43.360 Do you know what a trio? Three? 0:14:43.720 --> 0:14:44.160 The trio? 0:14:44.520 --> 0:14:48.440 Okay? So salsa guak duh? Yeah, okay, sick, you know, sick. 0:14:49.760 --> 0:14:52.160 But I wanted to bring that up because I think 0:14:52.280 --> 0:14:53.800 a lot of people who are I mean the world 0:14:53.840 --> 0:14:55.680 right now in general, there's a lot of stuff going on, 0:14:56.160 --> 0:14:59.560 and I can joke and laugh about how I start 0:14:59.640 --> 0:15:03.240 new hop every other week, and at the same time 0:15:03.440 --> 0:15:05.200 that is a coping skill for me that I've learned 0:15:05.240 --> 0:15:07.440 really works, and then I get to give people things. 0:15:07.800 --> 0:15:12.800 Okay, So creativity is the opposite of anxiety? Is creativity 0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:13.800 the opposite of anger? 0:15:15.520 --> 0:15:18.680 Well, if your anger brings you anxiety, it could help 0:15:18.720 --> 0:15:21.440 with that. But you can do a lot of I mean, 0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:23.880 journaling could be the opposite of that's creative. 0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:27.120 Yeah, I I mean, you're. 0:15:26.960 --> 0:15:28.280 Trying to see if that could work for you. 0:15:28.960 --> 0:15:30.200 Yeah, I don't know. I'm trying to think if I 0:15:30.240 --> 0:15:33.920 need like to dive into some sort of hobby. Journaling 0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:37.720 isn't Yeah, writing is creative, but me, just. 0:15:37.600 --> 0:15:40.560 Like you, weren't doing creative writing writing. 0:15:40.280 --> 0:15:42.680 Down every thought that's coming into my brain so that 0:15:42.760 --> 0:15:45.520 I have like free flow, like like my pen didn't 0:15:45.520 --> 0:15:49.080 really leave the pad, which I got that from. Speaking 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:54.520 of creativity, The Artist's Way, Yeah, that book where just 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:58.040 start writing pay doing your morning pages. 0:15:58.360 --> 0:16:00.800 So if you were to what's that's a creative thing 0:16:00.880 --> 0:16:02.360 that you've enjoyed? 0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:04.640 Yeah, I need to you. A couple years ago, were 0:16:04.640 --> 0:16:05.240 trying to paint. 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:09.320 Yeah, and I was a huge puzzler, huge I was 0:16:09.400 --> 0:16:13.040 bird watching. But maybe I need to get into necklaces. 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:17.200 Like honestly, your little board that you have that measures 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:20.880 out with like the like that you got that on Amazon. 0:16:21.520 --> 0:16:22.600 I went to hobby lobby and. 0:16:23.520 --> 0:16:25.000 I like to see the stuff. 0:16:25.080 --> 0:16:26.760 Yeah, no, that's good because yeah, you never know when 0:16:26.760 --> 0:16:29.840 you're ordering it. Yeah, okay, why helping people if they 0:16:29.840 --> 0:16:31.280 want to figure out, like if they want to do 0:16:31.320 --> 0:16:31.920 it as well. 0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:32.680 I don't know. 0:16:32.720 --> 0:16:34.600 If you've got a hobby, send it in. Let us know, 0:16:35.000 --> 0:16:38.160 create abby, Like, what's your creative hobby? 0:16:38.280 --> 0:16:39.160 Not too expensive? 0:16:39.200 --> 0:16:40.640 I think that's the other thing is I went to 0:16:40.720 --> 0:16:44.520 hobby lobby and spent like sixty dollars and got enough 0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:48.120 stuff to make fifty necklaces. 0:16:48.200 --> 0:16:49.840 Yeah, like you have gifts for all your friends for 0:16:50.520 --> 0:16:51.320 the next year. 0:16:51.560 --> 0:16:55.600 Like this was three dollars, but this would be. 0:16:55.520 --> 0:16:58.000 A really special birthday present. Yeah, Like, I mean think 0:16:58.000 --> 0:17:02.320 about it if with I know we're six months from Christmas, 0:17:02.440 --> 0:17:05.920 but it's still a good Like what if this year 0:17:06.720 --> 0:17:09.080 you did that, You went to hobby lobby and over 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:12.399 the next few months months you start making gifts for 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:15.240 the people in your life, and then boom, You've got 0:17:15.480 --> 0:17:20.560 a homemade, really cute, special Christmas gift that looks like 0:17:20.640 --> 0:17:22.199 it came from anthropology. 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:25.760 So if I'm using girl math correctly, I'm saving so 0:17:25.920 --> 0:17:29.159 much money. Yes, because this is now the gift everybody 0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:29.720 will receive it. 0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:32.280 If you gave me this for Christmas, I would. 0:17:32.080 --> 0:17:34.400 Be like, Okay, this is I show. It just came 0:17:34.440 --> 0:17:37.040 a little early Christmas. I let you open it early 0:17:37.400 --> 0:17:40.399 Merry Christmas, Christmas? What is it they typically do Christmas 0:17:40.440 --> 0:17:40.800 in July? 0:17:41.960 --> 0:17:43.159 Can I have a back? I'll wrap it up. 0:17:43.200 --> 0:17:46.320 But I think this makes you think of my ADHD 0:17:46.440 --> 0:17:49.520 which certain things I've really been working on is trying 0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:54.280 to be more prepared and being on time, so we're 0:17:54.320 --> 0:17:56.680 on time, on time, like to. 0:17:57.040 --> 0:17:59.080 A place or like because remember that one time I 0:17:59.080 --> 0:18:01.000 gave you a birthday present, I think six months after 0:18:01.040 --> 0:18:01.560 your birthday. 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:04.240 Yeah, it say cat language cards and stuff. 0:18:04.280 --> 0:18:07.359 That's okay, I don't know. I mean like on time 0:18:07.520 --> 0:18:12.200 physically to play places, like work stuff on time check, 0:18:12.280 --> 0:18:15.000 no problem. But like if my boyfriend and I are 0:18:15.040 --> 0:18:18.880 going somewhere, like last week, we went to this writer's 0:18:18.920 --> 0:18:22.440 round thing at this place that's in Franklin, Tennessee, which 0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:24.080 is right outside of Nashville, so cute. It's called the 0:18:24.160 --> 0:18:25.480 Red Wheel, and. 0:18:25.560 --> 0:18:27.600 That's out of town where you went on your vacation. 0:18:27.760 --> 0:18:31.159 Yeah, where we went on vacation. So sometimes going on 0:18:31.240 --> 0:18:33.480 vacation might be you know, driving fifteen minutes up the 0:18:33.520 --> 0:18:37.040 road to a restaurant. But his dad was a part 0:18:37.080 --> 0:18:40.080 of this opening night, And if you're in Franklin or 0:18:40.119 --> 0:18:42.760 in Nashville, it's like a summer series thing that's happening, 0:18:42.800 --> 0:18:45.840 so it'd have to be this this summer twenty twenty 0:18:45.840 --> 0:18:47.919 five podcasts are weird. What if someone's listening to this 0:18:48.000 --> 0:18:50.400 in twenty twenty seven, I'd be like, too late, Yes, 0:18:50.440 --> 0:18:52.320 you missed it. Because some people I get emails from 0:18:52.359 --> 0:18:55.160 people sometimes they're like, I just started listening to your podcast. 0:18:55.160 --> 0:18:56.520 I went all the way back to the beginning. 0:18:56.960 --> 0:19:00.800 I think that they know that they know. Yea, they know. 0:19:00.920 --> 0:19:03.239 We don't get the restclaimer that this was in the past, right, 0:19:03.280 --> 0:19:06.639 it also had a different name. We've evolved, so it 0:19:06.720 --> 0:19:09.960 was last week he was picking me up, and I'm 0:19:10.000 --> 0:19:13.240 getting to where I'm noticing my brain is my little 0:19:13.280 --> 0:19:16.240 things that I'm doing to try to work towards being 0:19:16.280 --> 0:19:21.600 on time with ease are working because I'm just naturally 0:19:22.200 --> 0:19:24.840 getting ready earlier. I'm doing things in an order that 0:19:24.880 --> 0:19:26.920 make more sense, like I should go ahead and get 0:19:26.960 --> 0:19:30.000 ready now and then work on x y Z instead 0:19:30.000 --> 0:19:32.000 of working on x y Z, which then lead me 0:19:32.040 --> 0:19:33.960 to getting ready and I'm rushing, and then he gets 0:19:33.960 --> 0:19:38.440 here and I'm not ready, like genius, Well that is, 0:19:38.920 --> 0:19:43.800 I guess that's how a normal, what a typical neurotypical 0:19:43.880 --> 0:19:48.280 neurotypical brain may function that way, where they can organize 0:19:48.320 --> 0:19:50.199 things in a way that makes the most sense, like 0:19:50.560 --> 0:19:54.920 I'm more greasy with it, which ends up an issue. 0:19:55.280 --> 0:19:58.400 So all this to say, I've been aware of it, 0:19:58.440 --> 0:20:00.760 and it's kind of fun because I'm like, I am 0:20:00.800 --> 0:20:03.320 going to be ready on time and this is so 0:20:03.400 --> 0:20:05.679 great and I'm proud of myself and I am celebrating it. 0:20:06.240 --> 0:20:08.320 Or were you late to that event? No? 0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:11.199 I was on time, That's my point. Like, and I 0:20:11.359 --> 0:20:13.960 noticed what I did to set myself up for success 0:20:14.000 --> 0:20:15.800 to be on time. Like when he showed up here 0:20:15.800 --> 0:20:19.920 and I was ready to go, he was like, you're ready? 0:20:20.119 --> 0:20:21.040 What? And it was like. 0:20:21.040 --> 0:20:26.119 Prepared to He's prepared to wait? Which ironically or coincidentally, 0:20:26.440 --> 0:20:32.840 whichever word fits you pick At the Writer's Round, one 0:20:32.840 --> 0:20:36.840 of the songwriters wrote that song Waiting on a Woman. 0:20:38.359 --> 0:20:40.679 Now I can't sing what it is, but he's like, 0:20:40.760 --> 0:20:45.040 wait not. I think Brad Paisley ended up singing it, 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:48.480 but this is the songwriter, wait, waiting on a Woman? 0:20:49.040 --> 0:20:51.800 I can't You don't not familiar? Yes, I believe Brad 0:20:51.800 --> 0:20:52.320 did record. 0:20:52.440 --> 0:20:54.000 Is that ironic or coincidence? 0:20:54.200 --> 0:20:56.440 That's why I said both, And you pick. 0:20:56.840 --> 0:21:01.960 Ironic it's ironic? Isn't it a coincidence? Ironic? 0:21:02.119 --> 0:21:05.959 Is it's ray on your wedding day? Is that ironic 0:21:06.040 --> 0:21:08.560 though it's a free ride when you've already paid. 0:21:09.000 --> 0:21:11.119 It's good advice that you. 0:21:11.240 --> 0:21:14.520 Just didn't to take, and who would have thought it? 0:21:14.560 --> 0:21:20.120 Figures it's I never knew the traffic jim when you're 0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:20.840 already late. 0:21:21.400 --> 0:21:22.280 That's not ironic. 0:21:23.480 --> 0:21:27.800 Oh, okay, we have When Varble and Don Samson wrote 0:21:27.800 --> 0:21:31.960 this for Brad Paisley, and When and Dawn were both there, 0:21:32.040 --> 0:21:34.520 so both of the songwriters are there and they sang 0:21:34.560 --> 0:21:37.920 it and it was funny because my boyfriend are sitting 0:21:37.960 --> 0:21:40.040 there and this is whole song about waiting on a woman. 0:21:40.040 --> 0:21:42.520 But it takes you through a timeline where he's like 0:21:43.080 --> 0:21:45.040 waiting to meet a woman, and then when he meets her, 0:21:45.119 --> 0:21:47.520 he's waiting on her to always be ready. But then 0:21:47.600 --> 0:21:50.159 he passes away first and he's in heaven waiting on 0:21:50.359 --> 0:21:53.359 his woman. But he this is where he's fine waiting. 0:21:53.400 --> 0:21:55.400 He'll find a bench because he doesn't want her to 0:21:55.880 --> 0:21:59.320 leave her life on earth to come. So he's fine 0:21:59.320 --> 0:22:01.639 with waiting because he got used to waiting on a woman. 0:22:02.560 --> 0:22:06.440 But anyway, the fact that he sang that song on 0:22:06.480 --> 0:22:09.080 an evening that my boyfriend. 0:22:09.040 --> 0:22:11.880 Didn't have to wait on that's ironic. So then okay, 0:22:11.880 --> 0:22:12.520 that's ironic. 0:22:12.600 --> 0:22:17.120 Okay, yeah, so it's like then singing a song about 0:22:17.200 --> 0:22:20.960 waiting on a woman on the night that your boyfriend 0:22:21.000 --> 0:22:21.560 didn't have. 0:22:21.560 --> 0:22:24.560 To wait on a woman, and if he did have 0:22:24.600 --> 0:22:27.320 to wait on you, it would be a coincidence because 0:22:27.359 --> 0:22:28.240 he didn't have to wait. 0:22:28.320 --> 0:22:29.600 Then it's ironic. 0:22:29.640 --> 0:22:32.760 There, Okay, right, I don't Okay, now it's like too much. 0:22:32.800 --> 0:22:35.560 But I use the Atlantis song a lot when I'm 0:22:35.560 --> 0:22:36.680 trying to figure out ironic. 0:22:36.720 --> 0:22:39.800 I like, but I don't think her stuff is really ironic. Well, 0:22:39.840 --> 0:22:41.639 then why she put it in the song just because 0:22:41.720 --> 0:22:44.160 she wanted to make a song. I feel like she's 0:22:44.280 --> 0:22:48.520 so very she's smart, like she would make it work anyway. 0:22:48.960 --> 0:22:51.200 I nudged him during that song and I was like, 0:22:51.600 --> 0:22:52.600 you don't have to wait. 0:22:52.440 --> 0:23:08.040 On me today, you don't have to wait on me today, 0:23:08.600 --> 0:23:13.479 and other things since then. I just maybe because I 0:23:13.520 --> 0:23:16.199 celebrated it and I want to not break my streak. 0:23:17.080 --> 0:23:22.320 I'm trying to stay the course and just get more 0:23:22.400 --> 0:23:26.760 places with ease. And I don't know there's something about it, 0:23:26.800 --> 0:23:29.800 because I don't know if it's just ADHD people or 0:23:29.800 --> 0:23:31.680 other people may have this too, Like the whole time 0:23:31.680 --> 0:23:36.040 blindness thing, but like there's things that just are difficult 0:23:36.040 --> 0:23:39.280 for me, and that's sometimes organizing what order in which 0:23:39.280 --> 0:23:42.040 I need to do things. Yeah, so here we are. 0:23:42.800 --> 0:23:48.399 I have a list of borderline impossible things for ADHD brains, 0:23:48.400 --> 0:23:50.200 so I thought we could go over it because that'd 0:23:50.240 --> 0:23:51.600 be like, that's one of them. 0:23:51.720 --> 0:23:54.040 Yeah. And I think also even if you don't have ADHD, 0:23:54.080 --> 0:23:57.440 this is helpful because sometimes when people hear this, they're like, wait, 0:23:57.840 --> 0:23:59.639 that's hard for you. So it helps you have a 0:23:59.640 --> 0:24:02.960 little bit or compassion and empathy for somebody who's struggling 0:24:02.960 --> 0:24:05.399 to do something that seems kind of like a mundane task. 0:24:06.440 --> 0:24:08.960 Yeah, because it's not like we're trying to do it 0:24:09.000 --> 0:24:11.960 on purpose. But I do have awareness of it. And 0:24:12.000 --> 0:24:14.640 so that's where it's tricky, which you've said before, sort 0:24:14.680 --> 0:24:15.600 of like therapy is. 0:24:15.560 --> 0:24:18.639 The awareness is the booby trap of therapy. Yeah, the 0:24:18.640 --> 0:24:19.320 booby trap. 0:24:20.520 --> 0:24:22.560 It's all a booby trap because then what you're aware, 0:24:22.640 --> 0:24:24.760 it's like, Okay, well I can continue to live life 0:24:24.800 --> 0:24:27.280 this way, or I can try to do something about it. Yeah, 0:24:27.320 --> 0:24:30.919 which I'm I'm personally not medicated, but for other people 0:24:30.960 --> 0:24:34.160 they may want to medicate. But I do neuro feedback, 0:24:34.760 --> 0:24:36.679 which has been helping my brain. I go on and 0:24:36.720 --> 0:24:38.879 off with that, and I've even bounced around to a 0:24:38.920 --> 0:24:41.239 couple of different places and I try to figure out 0:24:41.240 --> 0:24:44.600 what works for me, and I started taking well, I 0:24:44.600 --> 0:24:48.600 do like lions Maine and my coffee and some other 0:24:48.880 --> 0:24:55.399 mushrooms like cordyceps. Okay, like not harooms type shrew me 0:24:55.520 --> 0:24:59.720 type things, more of the adaptogens. Okay, let me know. Okay, 0:24:59.720 --> 0:25:05.080 if this resonates for your ADHD rain car maintenance, yes, Like. 0:25:05.840 --> 0:25:08.160 I just can't change my oil so much. 0:25:08.240 --> 0:25:12.000 So well, like physically you mean, just go get it changed, 0:25:12.080 --> 0:25:15.360 or you you can't actually change it yourself because of both, Well, 0:25:15.359 --> 0:25:16.720 but I don't want to change it myself. 0:25:16.840 --> 0:25:18.240 Well, I'm both. 0:25:18.400 --> 0:25:21.600 I have such a hard time when I get a 0:25:21.600 --> 0:25:23.399 little bit panics when I see the car engine light 0:25:23.840 --> 0:25:25.480 so much so. I think I've told the story on 0:25:25.520 --> 0:25:27.920 the podcast where I waited too long and my car 0:25:28.000 --> 0:25:31.520 broke down in the middle of a very busy intersection. 0:25:31.600 --> 0:25:33.440 I had to get my car towed, no oil left. 0:25:33.560 --> 0:25:36.679 Interesting though, but I think this is because I have 0:25:36.720 --> 0:25:40.840 ADHD with like not really a lot of anxiety. I 0:25:40.880 --> 0:25:43.760 think you have ADHD with a lot of a lot 0:25:43.760 --> 0:25:46.840 of anxiety. Like when we travel together, you want to 0:25:46.880 --> 0:25:48.720 get to the airport two hours early. I want to 0:25:48.760 --> 0:25:53.120 get there twenty minutes before boarding, like especially if I'm 0:25:53.119 --> 0:25:55.880 not checking a bag and I have TSSA free and 0:25:56.000 --> 0:25:58.520 you you like freak out over that, but like it's 0:25:58.520 --> 0:26:00.320 a owt you do. 0:26:00.520 --> 0:26:03.879 I react normally to somebody, Okay. 0:26:03.640 --> 0:26:05.040 Now you're like hyper ventilating. 0:26:05.200 --> 0:26:08.199 Okay, but you lived too much on the edge, Like 0:26:08.200 --> 0:26:10.920 why would you put yourself in that situation? And remember 0:26:11.000 --> 0:26:13.080 when we were in New York, literally our flight was 0:26:13.800 --> 0:26:16.240 leaving in an hour and we hadn't even left the apartment, 0:26:16.359 --> 0:26:18.320 and I was trying to be so cool, and I 0:26:18.320 --> 0:26:19.960 think in the it was finally the uber that. 0:26:19.960 --> 0:26:23.560 I was like, I'm god of freaking out over here, like. 0:26:23.640 --> 0:26:27.240 Shaky, yeah, because why would you not just get there 0:26:27.280 --> 0:26:29.080 early so you could make sure. 0:26:29.280 --> 0:26:31.680 I know, but that's part of my growth. And now 0:26:31.720 --> 0:26:33.760 I will meet you halfway. And I think knew me 0:26:34.640 --> 0:26:38.040 the last week or so would be able to get 0:26:38.080 --> 0:26:40.000 to the airport early, because why wouldn't I want to 0:26:40.000 --> 0:26:41.840 do that with ease. But my point back to the 0:26:41.920 --> 0:26:43.959 check engine light or something in the car, is like 0:26:44.359 --> 0:26:48.200 you get nervous with it, like I'm like, ugh, who cares, 0:26:48.240 --> 0:26:50.400 there's a light on? Like we'll figure that out later. 0:26:50.600 --> 0:26:52.639 But it just seems a little overwhell. It's like I 0:26:52.680 --> 0:26:56.480 don't want to deal with it, so I just I'm like, Okay, 0:26:56.760 --> 0:26:58.720 i'll do it later today. And then that turns into 0:26:58.760 --> 0:27:00.160 later tomorrow, which turns into. 0:27:00.119 --> 0:27:03.480 You to minimize it, where I'm just like I avoid it. 0:27:04.040 --> 0:27:07.800 Yeah, I minimize avoid it, and you anxiously avoid it 0:27:07.920 --> 0:27:08.399 or something. 0:27:09.119 --> 0:27:09.560 I don't know. 0:27:09.640 --> 0:27:13.080 It's different though, like his energy is different, but same, 0:27:14.080 --> 0:27:18.439 different but the same. What about returning things, because like 0:27:18.800 --> 0:27:21.120 I often. 0:27:21.560 --> 0:27:24.080 You know that I hadn't returned things from Amazon for 0:27:24.119 --> 0:27:26.080 about like five years. It was a recent thing that 0:27:26.080 --> 0:27:28.200 I realized how easy it was to return things from Amazon. 0:27:28.280 --> 0:27:29.880 Wait, you returned something to the Amazon? 0:27:30.200 --> 0:27:31.280 No, I didn't. I have. 0:27:31.560 --> 0:27:34.439 I used to have a box in my closet with 0:27:34.520 --> 0:27:36.800 things that needed to be returned that I didn't return. 0:27:36.880 --> 0:27:38.479 It was like a joke from all my friends. 0:27:39.000 --> 0:27:41.200 They're like, you'll never return this if you buy it 0:27:41.200 --> 0:27:42.600 off of Amazon, and I didn't. 0:27:42.760 --> 0:27:46.080 I didn't realize it was so easy. Okay, it felt 0:27:46.119 --> 0:27:46.600 like a lot. 0:27:46.880 --> 0:27:49.240 So I guess what I'm asking for Cody on is 0:27:49.280 --> 0:27:52.200 did you decide to return things from five years ago 0:27:52.400 --> 0:27:53.679 or you just started returning? 0:27:53.760 --> 0:27:55.800 I just started. I think I gave most of that 0:27:55.800 --> 0:27:57.800 stuff to Goodwill. I think I sold some of it 0:27:57.840 --> 0:27:58.880 on Facebook marketplace. 0:28:00.040 --> 0:28:03.359 Good for you. Yeah, I think just returning stuff, like 0:28:03.480 --> 0:28:07.200 especially from impulse purchases, can be very returning your aff 0:28:07.240 --> 0:28:09.920 to them all. Yeah. Like I bought a new collared 0:28:10.480 --> 0:28:13.920 workout shirt from Target for pickleball. I needed a caller 0:28:14.000 --> 0:28:17.640 shirt for where I was playing, and it was way 0:28:17.640 --> 0:28:19.960 too tight. And I keep saying, I'm gonna go to Target, 0:28:20.000 --> 0:28:21.520 I'm gonna go to Target. I'm gonna do Target, and 0:28:21.520 --> 0:28:24.600 guess what, I still have it and it's too tight, 0:28:24.640 --> 0:28:25.639 Like I'm not gonna be able to wear it, and 0:28:25.680 --> 0:28:28.480 I don't. I don't think I'll miss a window. But oftentimes, 0:28:28.480 --> 0:28:30.119 depending on where you got it from, you miss the 0:28:30.160 --> 0:28:34.560 window and then we accept defeat. Getting gas before the 0:28:34.600 --> 0:28:35.399 tank is empty. 0:28:36.280 --> 0:28:40.120 Okay, this is interesting again. If my gas light is on, 0:28:40.960 --> 0:28:44.240 I get anxious, Like there's some people that drive their 0:28:44.240 --> 0:28:46.080 car till zero. 0:28:46.480 --> 0:28:47.240 Could never be me. 0:28:48.000 --> 0:28:49.640 See, that's weird. That is total me. So have you 0:28:49.680 --> 0:28:53.440 ever run out of gas? I haven't in forever. No, 0:28:53.520 --> 0:28:56.520 I always to make it. But my car says now 0:28:56.720 --> 0:28:58.920 it goes from to like towards empty, and then it'll 0:28:58.920 --> 0:29:02.680 say please refuse like a little written note. And then 0:29:03.560 --> 0:29:06.520 when it gets to the note changes from please refuel 0:29:06.560 --> 0:29:08.160 to refuel immediately. 0:29:08.360 --> 0:29:09.600 That's when you do it. I do it. 0:29:09.800 --> 0:29:11.400 But you didn't answer my question. Have you ever run 0:29:11.440 --> 0:29:13.760 out of gas? Yes, okay, you've got to avoid it. 0:29:13.760 --> 0:29:15.600 But it's been a long time. I just know I 0:29:15.600 --> 0:29:16.920 said it's been a long time. 0:29:17.000 --> 0:29:20.239 That's then but no, so no or something like that. 0:29:20.280 --> 0:29:23.200 Okay, well, that's just filler words. I realize sometimes I 0:29:23.280 --> 0:29:26.480 say butt and it doesn't even make sense, Like if 0:29:26.480 --> 0:29:28.760 I hear myself back and I'll be talking, like even 0:29:28.880 --> 0:29:30.400 during some of our episodes, like if I have to 0:29:30.400 --> 0:29:32.960 listen to something and I hear it back, I'm like, 0:29:32.960 --> 0:29:33.960 why did I just say butt? 0:29:34.000 --> 0:29:34.360 Right there? 0:29:34.520 --> 0:29:37.280 I say, so, that was probably me just saying but 0:29:37.280 --> 0:29:41.280 but anyway, but so but but but is a filler 0:29:41.320 --> 0:29:41.760 word for me. 0:29:41.880 --> 0:29:44.200 Okay, so you haven't have gas, but now your car 0:29:44.240 --> 0:29:47.920 helps you. But here's the here's the thing. What if 0:29:48.360 --> 0:29:53.000 refill immediately happens while you're not close to a gas station. 0:29:53.120 --> 0:29:54.840 I get yeah, I get that. I'm trying to be 0:29:54.880 --> 0:29:57.880 better at it. I mean, my son, he freaks out 0:29:57.920 --> 0:30:00.000 about the gas tank. And even last night we were 0:30:00.080 --> 0:30:01.680 driving and he was like, how much guess do you have? 0:30:01.840 --> 0:30:03.360 And I said I have half a tank and he 0:30:03.440 --> 0:30:06.360 was like, dad fills up around half a tank. And 0:30:06.400 --> 0:30:11.160 I was like, isn't that nice? Isn't your dad so prepared? 0:30:12.600 --> 0:30:14.920 I mean, a lot of the tank a wild well, 0:30:15.040 --> 0:30:17.400 a lot of people won't. They'll go between half a 0:30:17.480 --> 0:30:19.600 quarter of a tank and they are definitely getting gas. 0:30:20.080 --> 0:30:21.920 I have never been that way. 0:30:22.080 --> 0:30:23.760 You know, what I really feel like a win is 0:30:23.760 --> 0:30:26.040 is when you fill up your gas. Like if I 0:30:26.040 --> 0:30:28.120 have to fill up my tank out, I be like, 0:30:28.120 --> 0:30:29.880 I'm gonna do it in the morning. When you actually 0:30:29.920 --> 0:30:32.040 do it for your morning self so and then you're 0:30:32.080 --> 0:30:33.320 not rushed to work. 0:30:33.600 --> 0:30:36.600 That feels like I climbed a mountain. M h. I 0:30:36.640 --> 0:30:38.080 feel so proud of myself. 0:30:38.160 --> 0:30:39.520 I got gas the other day and I got so 0:30:39.600 --> 0:30:41.200 bored doing it. I didn't fill all the way up. 0:30:41.280 --> 0:30:42.760 I think I got to half a tank. 0:30:43.440 --> 0:30:46.440 You're like, this place is lame. I'm out of here, 0:30:48.040 --> 0:30:48.360 I know. 0:30:48.600 --> 0:30:51.720 I was like, why I drove off and it only 0:30:51.840 --> 0:30:53.640 was it half a tank, and I was like, why 0:30:53.720 --> 0:30:54.600 am I this way? 0:30:54.920 --> 0:30:57.960 All of those people go and fill up that half. 0:30:58.000 --> 0:31:00.240 You only filled up because. 0:31:00.360 --> 0:31:03.880 I was over it. And I was like, what what 0:31:04.400 --> 0:31:07.040 is wrong with me? Because now I'm gonna have to 0:31:07.080 --> 0:31:10.560 come back even sooner and you're to come do this again. 0:31:11.680 --> 0:31:17.080 It's stupid, Like I do not be like me. 0:31:17.120 --> 0:31:18.400 Stati didn't have good vibes. 0:31:19.000 --> 0:31:21.920 I don't know, just don't be like me. Although I 0:31:21.920 --> 0:31:26.200 am a working Morgan progress maybe I'll maybe with just 0:31:26.240 --> 0:31:29.720 like now I'm gonna be ready when my boyfriend's coming 0:31:29.720 --> 0:31:32.400 to pick me up. I'm gonna turn over a new 0:31:32.480 --> 0:31:35.840 leaf and like start filling up it three quarters of 0:31:35.840 --> 0:31:36.160 a tank. 0:31:37.080 --> 0:31:39.680 Imagine that too much? Then you're doing it like every other. 0:31:39.560 --> 0:31:43.520 Day, okay, okay, grocery shopping with a plan. I always 0:31:43.560 --> 0:31:46.800 have like a list in my head and I'm like, okay, yeah, 0:31:47.120 --> 0:31:51.400 I'm pretty sure I have basil, but we're definitely out 0:31:51.440 --> 0:31:55.320 of paprika, and so I'll buy paprika and not get basil, 0:31:55.360 --> 0:31:58.200 and then I'll get home and I have the opposite. 0:31:58.320 --> 0:32:01.960 It's like literally the opposite, or like you know, when 0:32:01.960 --> 0:32:03.959 you're doing something and you have to like tell it 0:32:03.960 --> 0:32:07.520 to yourself. Like I was making cupcakes the other day 0:32:07.560 --> 0:32:10.120 and I was like, third a cup of oil, third 0:32:10.160 --> 0:32:11.160 a couple of Oh. 0:32:10.880 --> 0:32:12.040 My god, third a cup of oil. 0:32:12.160 --> 0:32:13.920 And then I go and I'm like, third a cup 0:32:13.960 --> 0:32:15.800 of oil, and I know it's a third a couple 0:32:15.800 --> 0:32:18.040 of oil, but I have to check the box a 0:32:18.120 --> 0:32:19.920 million times. But then of course I don't check the 0:32:19.920 --> 0:32:22.440 box for the full instructions because it's like mix all 0:32:22.440 --> 0:32:24.320 the wet and then add it to the dry, but 0:32:24.400 --> 0:32:26.320 I just throw it all in at the same time. 0:32:26.360 --> 0:32:28.160 And I was like, why did they want me to 0:32:28.440 --> 0:32:29.600 do like separate. 0:32:29.360 --> 0:32:30.720 Overly check this one thing? 0:32:30.800 --> 0:32:34.280 But then you totally disregard Yes, exactly speaking, I literally 0:32:34.280 --> 0:32:37.479 have to read the recipe seventeen times, but like you 0:32:37.560 --> 0:32:39.080 know that you know, but then at the same time 0:32:39.080 --> 0:32:40.880 you're like, did I make that up? Or like did 0:32:40.880 --> 0:32:43.200 I am? I seeing it backwards? Like is it correct? 0:32:43.480 --> 0:32:44.080 What would it be? 0:32:44.120 --> 0:32:46.240 Like I always wanted to have a photographic memory. 0:32:46.400 --> 0:32:50.800 Oh my gosh, amazing, we would rule the world, the world. 0:32:50.920 --> 0:32:53.800 The world would be so induvsive, Oh my gosh, people 0:32:53.840 --> 0:32:55.920 would be in all of us. 0:32:56.040 --> 0:33:00.000 Instead, I'm like digging the box out of the trash 0:33:00.160 --> 0:33:03.160 because I threw it away thinking I remember exactly what 0:33:03.240 --> 0:33:05.200 I need, and I'm like, okay, better go get those 0:33:05.240 --> 0:33:07.360 instructions out of the trash can again, and then I'm 0:33:07.360 --> 0:33:11.120 reading them and I'm like, why am I this way? 0:33:11.480 --> 0:33:13.760 Literally like three eggs? Three eggs? Three eggs? Like I 0:33:13.800 --> 0:33:14.080 got it. 0:33:14.120 --> 0:33:15.960 You throw it away and then you're like how many eggs? 0:33:16.000 --> 0:33:17.479 I think it was three, but like I can't be 0:33:17.600 --> 0:33:19.320 so sure. It might be two, but like that would 0:33:19.320 --> 0:33:19.600 be creazy. 0:33:19.600 --> 0:33:22.200 And then did I put three? Ten? Thank god, there's 0:33:22.240 --> 0:33:24.920 three little yellow things floating in there are I wouldn't. 0:33:24.560 --> 0:33:27.440 Know the amount of times I'm like did I put 0:33:27.440 --> 0:33:28.320 the baking soda in? 0:33:28.440 --> 0:33:29.360 Or did I not put it in? 0:33:29.520 --> 0:33:31.880 Like I'm not sure, and so I try to go 0:33:31.920 --> 0:33:33.719 in an order of the ingredients, but sometimes you get 0:33:33.760 --> 0:33:34.560 ahead of yourself. 0:33:35.200 --> 0:33:38.320 Did I take my medication or did I not? Should 0:33:38.320 --> 0:33:40.840 I double up or go out more harmful to like 0:33:41.000 --> 0:33:43.160 not take it or have too much? 0:33:43.240 --> 0:33:45.560 And then I told myself so many times, just get 0:33:45.600 --> 0:33:46.680 one of those pill boxes. 0:33:46.760 --> 0:33:48.600 Then you'll always know if you've taken it or not. 0:33:48.840 --> 0:33:50.600 And I'm like, okay, I'm gonna do that, and then 0:33:50.840 --> 0:33:53.040 I'll like say I'll do it later, and then later 0:33:53.080 --> 0:33:54.720 it never comes, and then I tell myself I'm gonna 0:33:54.720 --> 0:33:54.959 do it. 0:33:55.080 --> 0:33:57.640 You know what, I think that pill boxes are like 0:33:57.880 --> 0:34:00.080 journals for ADHD people. You know how a lot of 0:34:00.160 --> 0:34:04.640 HD ADHD people have lots of journals. Yeah, like I 0:34:04.680 --> 0:34:07.320 need a new journal. I need a new planner for this, 0:34:07.400 --> 0:34:09.800 I need a new I have so many different pill 0:34:09.840 --> 0:34:12.399 box type containers. Yeah, because I have one. 0:34:12.760 --> 0:34:15.120 Yeah, okay, because I've never bought one. 0:34:15.400 --> 0:34:17.440 Oh really, I keep telling myself I'm gonna buy one, 0:34:17.480 --> 0:34:20.080 so then I don't forget if I'm taking my medication 0:34:20.520 --> 0:34:24.160 or not, or my vitamins or anything, and then I. 0:34:23.760 --> 0:34:25.920 I never do it. Come up to my Amazon shop 0:34:25.920 --> 0:34:29.279 in my bathroom. Why didn't you return them because I 0:34:29.320 --> 0:34:32.319 wanted hard? No, you just wanted I wanted them all, 0:34:32.400 --> 0:34:34.560 just like I want all my journals. Did you see 0:34:34.560 --> 0:34:35.560 that super cute journal? 0:34:35.680 --> 0:34:39.000 Your emotional support pill boxes? That's why I have so 0:34:39.040 --> 0:34:40.040 many water bottles. 0:34:40.719 --> 0:34:42.479 Yeah, I'm not that way with water bottles, just because 0:34:42.520 --> 0:34:44.839 I don't really like drinking water, But so you. 0:34:44.800 --> 0:34:47.600 Should get water bottles. Maybe that's what I'll get you 0:34:47.640 --> 0:34:48.280 for Christmas. 0:34:48.320 --> 0:34:50.839 Yeah, do you see the super cute journal? I head 0:34:50.880 --> 0:34:54.120 out there at the five minute journal with flowers. It's 0:34:54.120 --> 0:34:56.600 really cute. Yeah, it makes me want us to make 0:34:56.640 --> 0:34:59.640 a journal one day. Maybe we will for Christmas, maybe 0:34:59.680 --> 0:35:02.680 we will TBD so grocery shopping with a plan that's 0:35:02.680 --> 0:35:06.439 hard for people, day AHD filling out any paperwork when I'm. 0:35:06.320 --> 0:35:09.040 Talking about this, but the paperwork because I need to 0:35:09.080 --> 0:35:10.560 change my name. But I'm like, it sounds like so 0:35:10.680 --> 0:35:11.200 much work. 0:35:11.480 --> 0:35:13.000 I think I'm getting to the point where maybe I 0:35:13.040 --> 0:35:14.799 could do it, like I have to adult and do it, 0:35:14.840 --> 0:35:19.000 but I also have help at times. Shandon's in the room, 0:35:19.000 --> 0:35:20.400 so I feel like I need to acknowledge it. And 0:35:20.440 --> 0:35:22.920 she definitely helps make a lot of my paperwork, so 0:35:23.040 --> 0:35:24.960 I feel like she's like, I know how you get 0:35:24.960 --> 0:35:27.279 it done. 0:35:27.920 --> 0:35:29.719 You're like, I don't have a problem with that, And. 0:35:29.640 --> 0:35:33.000 I'm actually pulled out everything. My kids are doing great, 0:35:33.120 --> 0:35:35.520 medical school forms, insurance. 0:35:35.960 --> 0:35:38.040 I just got an urgent message that if I didn't 0:35:38.040 --> 0:35:39.680 feel something now, something would beat. 0:35:40.000 --> 0:35:42.200 I didn't just text it on our you don't have 0:35:42.239 --> 0:35:43.759 to give me credit ever, haha. 0:35:43.960 --> 0:35:45.480 Okay. But also for her to be like, oh, it's 0:35:45.520 --> 0:35:46.319 no problem for me. 0:35:46.680 --> 0:35:48.680 I know I can't act like that, like I know that. 0:35:49.200 --> 0:35:51.799 I know that that's and I also see that as 0:35:51.840 --> 0:35:53.560 like a gift, and I also know that I can't 0:35:53.560 --> 0:35:55.840 always rely on that, Like I need to have agency 0:35:55.880 --> 0:35:58.400 over my life and I need to do things. 0:35:58.480 --> 0:36:00.640 That's you saying, Okay, this is hard for me. I 0:36:00.680 --> 0:36:01.560 need help in this area. 0:36:01.680 --> 0:36:03.640 So you ask me, and I'm to a place where 0:36:03.680 --> 0:36:06.440 in my life I have been able to have that. 0:36:06.520 --> 0:36:09.120 I didn't always have that, and I justly didn't do 0:36:09.239 --> 0:36:13.640 things like paperwork. It's like, Oh, I finally, how did 0:36:13.680 --> 0:36:21.440 you know you've made it well? Making appointments? Oh my gosh. 0:36:21.480 --> 0:36:23.759 I've been trying to make myself be in charge of 0:36:23.800 --> 0:36:27.360 this part of my life of like calling and doing things. 0:36:27.520 --> 0:36:29.480 And are you calling or are you doing it online? That's 0:36:29.520 --> 0:36:30.200 a game changer. 0:36:30.560 --> 0:36:32.719 I'm texting or calling. 0:36:33.239 --> 0:36:37.360 If I have to call to make an appointment, probably 0:36:37.440 --> 0:36:38.080 not gonna happen. 0:36:38.160 --> 0:36:39.320 I guess it's mostly by text. 0:36:39.520 --> 0:36:42.040 If I can do it online, I think I'm good. 0:36:42.120 --> 0:36:44.759 But if I there's some places you go online, you 0:36:44.760 --> 0:36:46.840 send a message and then they call you to make the appointment, 0:36:47.719 --> 0:36:48.120 I'm out. 0:36:48.239 --> 0:36:50.360 Yeah. Yeah, especially if you call me back at a 0:36:50.360 --> 0:36:51.960 time where I don't know. I'm in that mode. Where 0:36:51.960 --> 0:36:53.719 I can't. Like, there's some things where I can like 0:36:53.800 --> 0:36:55.600 check on my text messages and I'm like good. And 0:36:55.600 --> 0:36:57.440 there's other times texts come in and I'm like, I 0:36:57.440 --> 0:36:58.799 don't know what to do. I'm just not even gonna 0:36:58.800 --> 0:37:00.359 open it. And it's like if someone that I want 0:37:00.360 --> 0:37:02.120 to hear from and that I really enjoy and I 0:37:02.200 --> 0:37:04.080 like them, but I'm like, I don't know. I physically 0:37:04.840 --> 0:37:08.120 I cannot open this text right now, and I'm like, 0:37:08.120 --> 0:37:11.240 what the what the what the what the what the 0:37:11.840 --> 0:37:16.520 It's so stupid. I don't like being this way mailing stuff. Yeah, 0:37:16.760 --> 0:37:20.400 birthday cars, that's why Kat becoming one of my nearest 0:37:20.400 --> 0:37:23.040 Sindira's closest friends ever. And you're having ADHD. It's like 0:37:23.080 --> 0:37:25.640 I finally met someone that I've never felt more seen 0:37:25.880 --> 0:37:28.000 and the same with on. 0:37:28.000 --> 0:37:31.480 Which is just because I forget your birthday. 0:37:31.560 --> 0:37:34.120 Yeah, because but you also know what it feels like. 0:37:34.200 --> 0:37:36.960 It feels horrible, like as the person that just. 0:37:36.920 --> 0:37:39.000 Goes on it's so sweet. I'm like, I only know 0:37:39.120 --> 0:37:41.520 that you're saying this. It's because I've gotten your birthday 0:37:41.520 --> 0:37:42.200 wrong every time. 0:37:42.360 --> 0:37:44.920 Yeah, it's like I met my match and your birthday. 0:37:44.640 --> 0:37:48.000 Is still on the wrong day in my calendar right now, Yeah, 0:37:48.040 --> 0:37:49.560 that's myself I was going to change. 0:37:49.560 --> 0:37:52.239 I think it's also more fun too that like every year, 0:37:52.280 --> 0:37:54.160 I'm going to look forward to seeing if it's you 0:37:54.200 --> 0:37:58.160 know that you get my birthday right, But I have 0:37:58.680 --> 0:38:00.959 empathy for people if they get it, like, of course 0:38:01.000 --> 0:38:03.680 do I want my birthday to be celebrated, like we 0:38:03.719 --> 0:38:06.240 all we do want to be remembered, and it feels good. 0:38:06.840 --> 0:38:10.040 And also if someone were to forget and be like, 0:38:10.080 --> 0:38:13.919 oh shoot, I am like, you know what been there? 0:38:14.280 --> 0:38:16.480 It's okay because I know when I've done that, it 0:38:16.560 --> 0:38:18.719 wasn't on purpose. However, one of the things that I 0:38:18.760 --> 0:38:22.000 did have to implement was a calendar and I have 0:38:22.080 --> 0:38:24.440 to utilize that more and I have it written down 0:38:24.480 --> 0:38:27.120 and I have the reminders and then you know, if 0:38:27.120 --> 0:38:29.600 you text someone. The thing is, it's tricky on an iPhone. 0:38:29.600 --> 0:38:32.320 If you text someone on the wrong day their birthday, 0:38:32.400 --> 0:38:35.400 iPhone will be like is this this person's birthday? And 0:38:35.440 --> 0:38:37.200 then they want to save it for you is that day? 0:38:37.640 --> 0:38:39.279 So if you think that that's it and you click 0:38:39.400 --> 0:38:40.520 save that it'll save it for you. 0:38:40.680 --> 0:38:43.080 I mean, then you're screwed. Manually put your birthday in 0:38:43.120 --> 0:38:43.759 the wrong day. 0:38:44.040 --> 0:38:47.120 Okay, it's okay, I forgive you. 0:38:47.320 --> 0:38:50.560 But that is nice that there's not pressure because if 0:38:50.640 --> 0:38:52.759 you forget something or something like that happens, there's not 0:38:52.880 --> 0:38:56.839 pressure for you to do everything perfectly because I'm like, oh, same. 0:38:57.160 --> 0:38:59.560 Yeah, but we don't just it's not like you do. 0:39:00.239 --> 0:39:02.920 You're not just gonna be like, oh, I'm gonna keep 0:39:02.920 --> 0:39:07.400 living this way although every year, but you show up 0:39:07.400 --> 0:39:09.880 in other ways, like really awesome other ways, Like I 0:39:09.880 --> 0:39:13.560 think everyone has their gifts and strengths, and I just think. 0:39:13.520 --> 0:39:15.960 Well, I'm always earlier on your birthday, so it's not 0:39:16.000 --> 0:39:17.120 like I forget your birthday. 0:39:17.560 --> 0:39:18.680 Yeah, so just. 0:39:20.360 --> 0:39:22.120 Gifts and strength, thank you. 0:39:22.120 --> 0:39:25.840 Thank you, so returns, birthday cars, important documents, mailing stuff, 0:39:25.880 --> 0:39:28.600 getting them into an actual mailbox. It feels harder than 0:39:29.360 --> 0:39:32.279 you would think, harder than it should, quite honestly. And 0:39:32.320 --> 0:39:35.879 then canceling subscriptions we don't use, like. 0:39:35.880 --> 0:39:39.800 That one is geared towards you. Yeah, how's your face? Fitness? 0:39:40.120 --> 0:39:41.680 Oh I cancel, canceled, cancel. 0:39:41.719 --> 0:39:42.520 I haven't even been doing it. 0:39:43.320 --> 0:39:44.719 You're not even doing exercises. 0:39:44.880 --> 0:39:46.600 I mean sometimes I open up my limps, but. 0:39:48.280 --> 0:39:49.279 Occasionally I'm like. 0:39:49.440 --> 0:39:52.759 See, maybe that's like your hyperfixation is like I hyper 0:39:52.800 --> 0:39:55.920 fixate on all these different hobbies. You hyper fixate on 0:39:56.000 --> 0:39:57.719 all these different like things, like. 0:39:58.080 --> 0:40:02.200 Really fitness as a hobby. It was, it was very 0:40:02.239 --> 0:40:02.960 time continued. 0:40:04.360 --> 0:40:08.080 It's not a hobby. Why what do you do for fun? 0:40:08.160 --> 0:40:15.279 I was yearning about Posta and the this muscle, I was, 0:40:15.800 --> 0:40:19.799 it's anatomy. It's not a hobby. I'm sorry Faceditness is 0:40:19.840 --> 0:40:22.680 not a hobby. It is jumping on a mini tramplate. 0:40:23.680 --> 0:40:24.680 If you like to tramp. 0:40:24.760 --> 0:40:26.640 I love to walk with my weight to best. 0:40:26.719 --> 0:40:27.320 That's a hobby. 0:40:27.480 --> 0:40:39.960 Is walking standing on my vibrating plate? Is that a hobby? 0:40:42.520 --> 0:40:44.439 Is walking standing on my vibrating clate? 0:40:45.200 --> 0:40:49.560 What is that a hobby? What my vibrating clate? You 0:40:49.600 --> 0:40:53.239 know the plates that you stand on. Wait, you don't 0:40:53.239 --> 0:40:56.719 know about a vibrating plate. First of all, what a 0:40:56.840 --> 0:41:01.040 vibrating fight. It's like a ron thing. 0:41:01.200 --> 0:41:04.480 And why you never told me about that? Hiding this 0:41:04.600 --> 0:41:04.880 from me? 0:41:05.120 --> 0:41:09.800 You stand on it and it's shaking your whole body, 0:41:09.840 --> 0:41:11.160 it's opening up your lengths. 0:41:11.920 --> 0:41:14.040 I've never heard of this. It reminds me of my 0:41:14.600 --> 0:41:18.839 great grandma had this exercise machine. No, it was like 0:41:18.920 --> 0:41:22.360 a little wooden square on a swivel, and you stood 0:41:22.400 --> 0:41:24.120 on it and you went like this. It's called the 0:41:24.120 --> 0:41:26.680 twisty turvy. And that was how they worked out. Is 0:41:26.719 --> 0:41:29.840 they just stood on their twisty turfy. Oh they did this. 0:41:30.120 --> 0:41:31.480 Your gret grandma didn't have. 0:41:31.400 --> 0:41:34.120 One of those. I saw My grandma did not. She 0:41:34.440 --> 0:41:39.960 bold and sat in her recliner smoked cigarettes. Okay, was 0:41:39.960 --> 0:41:42.040 her activity. I took this from my great grandma's house. 0:41:42.040 --> 0:41:43.960 I'm pretty sure when she passed away, and I think 0:41:44.000 --> 0:41:45.560 my mom still has it. If you would like to 0:41:45.600 --> 0:41:46.040 borrow it. 0:41:46.640 --> 0:41:48.000 That could be a hobby. I twist. 0:41:48.600 --> 0:41:52.120 Yeah. I guess my hobbies maybe different than here. 0:41:52.280 --> 0:41:53.879 I'm not trying to hate on your hobbies. I don't 0:41:53.880 --> 0:41:56.000 think that's a hobby. I think that's just something that. 0:41:55.960 --> 0:41:57.880 You do spend time doing. 0:41:58.080 --> 0:42:01.600 Yeah, the hobby to like, what's the definition of an 0:42:01.600 --> 0:42:04.399 interest that brings you like joy and that you I mean, 0:42:04.400 --> 0:42:05.160 I guess that would fit. 0:42:05.520 --> 0:42:08.400 Okay, I'll give you that. The vibrating plate isn't a hobby, 0:42:08.520 --> 0:42:09.960 but face fitness might be. 0:42:10.840 --> 0:42:13.279 Okay, And you know, I shouldn't have reacted that way 0:42:13.280 --> 0:42:14.800 because if that really is. 0:42:14.640 --> 0:42:17.239 What if I was like, what's your hobby? Skincare. 0:42:19.280 --> 0:42:20.960 I just like, how much time can you spend? 0:42:21.360 --> 0:42:24.359 Skincare is not but like face fitness would fall like, 0:42:24.360 --> 0:42:26.759 but some people might be really into like testing out 0:42:26.800 --> 0:42:29.160 different types of skincare and figuring out what works for 0:42:29.239 --> 0:42:32.239 them and then telling their friends and make up a 0:42:32.280 --> 0:42:35.080 hobby like you're how to do your eyes a fun 0:42:35.120 --> 0:42:36.120 way or makeup? 0:42:36.480 --> 0:42:39.000 Yeah, you're right, I'm being a little judge. So if 0:42:39.040 --> 0:42:41.040 you have facebitness to be your hobby. 0:42:40.840 --> 0:42:42.200 That, well it's not anymore. I quit. 0:42:42.320 --> 0:42:44.960 Okay, So what's your next hobby going to be? Can't 0:42:44.960 --> 0:42:51.160 be vibrating plate. Let's see, I really love cleaning. 0:42:52.200 --> 0:42:54.560 I love it. I've been really getting if I've been 0:42:54.680 --> 0:42:56.799 on my laundry gain like you would not. 0:42:56.800 --> 0:42:59.440 Believe, like laundry is your new hobby. 0:42:59.719 --> 0:43:04.080 Well, I've always loved laundry, but I am at peak 0:43:04.200 --> 0:43:08.400 laundry level where I rarely have. 0:43:08.800 --> 0:43:09.319 Anything to do. 0:43:09.400 --> 0:43:12.400 A dirty item come to my house, no like, and 0:43:12.600 --> 0:43:14.960 I'm I'm trying to make sure my kids are on it. 0:43:15.040 --> 0:43:18.040 And I'm like, if we've got laundry, we're getting done now. 0:43:18.160 --> 0:43:22.440 It's it probably doesn't make sense water wise. Are you 0:43:22.520 --> 0:43:24.480 like doing special things with the laundry? Or you just 0:43:24.520 --> 0:43:26.399 like like to no, I'm just like on it. It's 0:43:26.400 --> 0:43:28.279 like if if it's if it's in the wash and 0:43:28.360 --> 0:43:30.880 it's in the dryer, and then I'm gonna put it away. Okay, 0:43:31.040 --> 0:43:33.520 Like I'm I'm not doing this thing where I have 0:43:33.600 --> 0:43:36.840 piles everywhere because I part of my ADHD at times 0:43:36.880 --> 0:43:40.960 is to create piles. And now I still have certain piles, 0:43:41.960 --> 0:43:44.960 but my laundry is good. I'm pretty sure I have 0:43:45.040 --> 0:43:46.880 a load in the dryer right now, and when we 0:43:46.920 --> 0:43:48.640 get done, I'm gonna go put it away. And I'm 0:43:48.640 --> 0:43:50.160 gonna put it away. 0:43:50.280 --> 0:43:52.240 Okay. Well, i have a doffe and I'm. 0:43:52.120 --> 0:43:54.880 Not even going on vacation for like two more weeks, 0:43:55.080 --> 0:43:57.719 and I've already started organizing on a rack what I'm 0:43:57.719 --> 0:44:00.000 gonna pack? Who am I? 0:44:00.160 --> 0:44:01.880 Okay, but that's not a hobby. 0:44:02.200 --> 0:44:06.760 Well, but this is just norly I'm packing last minute. 0:44:06.840 --> 0:44:08.359 But I'm telling you, like, I don't know if it's 0:44:08.360 --> 0:44:11.239 my neural feedback or if it's just like my awareness 0:44:11.239 --> 0:44:12.440 and I'm trying to be more intentional. 0:44:12.480 --> 0:44:15.960 Are you excited about your vacation? Maybe can I tell 0:44:15.960 --> 0:44:18.359 you the definition of hobby? This might help us narrow 0:44:18.480 --> 0:44:21.440 down what your next hobby is going to be an 0:44:21.440 --> 0:44:26.520 activity done regularly in one's leisure time for pleasure. Hobbies 0:44:26.560 --> 0:44:30.160 are not pursued with intention of making a profit. So 0:44:31.120 --> 0:44:33.200 that's why I'm not selling my jewelry. I'm just giving 0:44:33.239 --> 0:44:38.120 it away, right. However, is this done in your leisure 0:44:38.160 --> 0:44:41.960 time for pleasure? Is is laundry done in your leisure 0:44:41.960 --> 0:44:43.319 time for pleasure? Yeah? 0:44:43.320 --> 0:44:47.400 I mean like I was like, and if that is 0:44:47.800 --> 0:44:48.719 satisfying to you. 0:44:48.800 --> 0:44:49.600 It was satisfying. 0:44:49.920 --> 0:44:52.920 Put it away. You have a certain like detergent that 0:44:52.960 --> 0:44:53.520 you love. 0:44:53.800 --> 0:45:00.799 That's unscented, freeing clear because my dermatologists, I had that rash. Remember, Yeah, 0:45:00.880 --> 0:45:04.560 I'm brad that rash. I can't even use scented detergent. 0:45:04.600 --> 0:45:07.000 I can't even use fabric softener anymore. I use vinegar, 0:45:08.000 --> 0:45:10.640 and I can't even use dryer sheets. I use wool 0:45:10.719 --> 0:45:13.919 balls and I put a drop of vanilla essential oil 0:45:13.960 --> 0:45:14.560 on the balls. 0:45:15.200 --> 0:45:16.400 Does it work yeah? 0:45:16.520 --> 0:45:19.600 Okay, but it's it's taken me a minute to get 0:45:19.680 --> 0:45:22.240 used to and then the balls they get lost. 0:45:22.480 --> 0:45:24.720 Okay. So are you satisfied with your hobby life? 0:45:25.400 --> 0:45:25.560 No? 0:45:25.800 --> 0:45:28.480 Okay, So let's we'll brainstorm a something for you to try. 0:45:28.560 --> 0:45:30.680 Okay, i'd be. I want our listeners to email us 0:45:30.680 --> 0:45:34.840 their hobbies. Oh yeah, okay, great ideas like I'd like 0:45:34.920 --> 0:45:39.359 to horseback ride, but it's expensive hobby. Well, it's harder 0:45:39.360 --> 0:45:40.719 than you would think. I've been trying to find a 0:45:40.719 --> 0:45:43.720 place for my kids to go because they did equine 0:45:43.719 --> 0:45:46.879 therapy and I thought, oh, they would really enjoy doing that, 0:45:47.080 --> 0:45:49.640 and it's hard to track down a place with a 0:45:49.640 --> 0:45:51.680 horse to go ride. So you're right, it's not easy. 0:45:51.800 --> 0:45:53.880 But I think if we could figure it out, I 0:45:53.920 --> 0:45:59.879 would want to ride horses, but not like competitively, just therapeutically. 0:46:00.440 --> 0:46:03.480 Have you seen those hobby horse things from Denay? 0:46:04.160 --> 0:46:04.319 Oh? 0:46:04.360 --> 0:46:06.880 No, but no, maybe day. 0:46:06.920 --> 0:46:11.920 Hey she's got this character is Judy hobby horsing? 0:46:12.160 --> 0:46:17.560 Judy does she jump around on a horse on a stick? Yes? Okay, 0:46:17.760 --> 0:46:18.719 that's a thing they have. 0:46:19.520 --> 0:46:22.480 I don't know what you're talking about, but hobby horsing 0:46:22.760 --> 0:46:26.279 is a real hobby that people now do, and it's 0:46:26.560 --> 0:46:28.040 they have like horse competitions. 0:46:28.040 --> 0:46:30.360 But you're just running around on the horse stick. 0:46:30.440 --> 0:46:31.120 Okay, that's not me. 0:46:31.160 --> 0:46:33.080 I'm not doing that. That would be easier than going 0:46:33.080 --> 0:46:35.200 to find a horse. I'm not doing that. 0:46:35.360 --> 0:46:37.440 Okay, So send in a hobby, so then you can 0:46:37.480 --> 0:46:38.960 pick one that you're definitely going to do. 0:46:39.080 --> 0:46:42.080 Yeah, y'all can email us your hobbies. Hey, they're at 0:46:42.080 --> 0:46:45.799 Feeling Things podcast dot com. And speaking of emails, we 0:46:45.840 --> 0:46:48.200 have an email at the day. This is just a 0:46:48.320 --> 0:46:51.480 very simple direct question that I thought we could address 0:46:51.560 --> 0:46:55.120 because you know, other people might be in this situation. 0:46:55.360 --> 0:46:55.759 Maybe not. 0:46:55.880 --> 0:46:58.799 It's kind of unique, but she said, Hey, hoping y'all 0:46:58.800 --> 0:47:01.200 can help a girl out recently matched with a man 0:47:01.239 --> 0:47:04.080 on a dating app. The thing is, we both have 0:47:04.239 --> 0:47:07.920 kids in a mutual activity and have never spoken. So 0:47:08.080 --> 0:47:10.560 I've been talking to him but he doesn't seem to 0:47:10.600 --> 0:47:13.920 recognize me in real life. Do I tell him or 0:47:14.000 --> 0:47:16.719 play dumb until we hopefully have a date? Thank you, 0:47:16.880 --> 0:47:17.640 smiley face. 0:47:18.680 --> 0:47:21.359 Okay, So I'm curious what you would do. So this 0:47:21.400 --> 0:47:23.560 is somebody who mets him in a dating app. It 0:47:23.600 --> 0:47:26.719 sounds like her child is maybe on like the same 0:47:26.760 --> 0:47:29.360 soccer team as this person's child. 0:47:29.560 --> 0:47:30.160 What would you do? 0:47:30.239 --> 0:47:33.280 Well, I'm like, why hasn't he put two and two together? 0:47:33.480 --> 0:47:36.200 I would be like, do my pictures look like me? 0:47:37.239 --> 0:47:40.400 Or maybe it's just that, like there is a bigger 0:47:40.440 --> 0:47:42.399 thing than a soccer team, Like, let's say they both 0:47:42.880 --> 0:47:45.600 go to the same gym, like gymnastics gym, that could 0:47:45.600 --> 0:47:48.440 be therebe hundreds of people there, So. 0:47:49.080 --> 0:47:52.120 I guess I would probably say something in the app 0:47:52.160 --> 0:47:55.600 if we've been messaging, I'd be like, hey, do you 0:47:55.640 --> 0:47:58.520 have a kid that plays soccer? 0:47:59.040 --> 0:47:59.480 Sports? 0:47:59.480 --> 0:48:01.800 Basketball? And then I mean. 0:48:01.719 --> 0:48:07.239 Like, I think that's an easy point of conversation and opener, right. 0:48:07.280 --> 0:48:10.040 Like, hey, random, but I think it's weird. We've been 0:48:10.120 --> 0:48:12.360 chatting on here and you definitely saw me at the 0:48:12.360 --> 0:48:14.280 basketball game this weekend and didn't say anything. 0:48:14.719 --> 0:48:15.600 That's awkward to me. 0:48:15.760 --> 0:48:17.160 Okay, so what's she supposed to do? 0:48:17.560 --> 0:48:20.239 That's what No. I'm saying, like, it's awkward to then 0:48:20.360 --> 0:48:22.560 see them and act like you don't know them. 0:48:22.600 --> 0:48:24.759 You know, I'm glad we read this because I think 0:48:24.840 --> 0:48:27.400 this can bring a lot of something that's bringing her anxiety. 0:48:27.480 --> 0:48:28.719 I don't think it's that big of a deal. 0:48:28.800 --> 0:48:31.560 I think you'd say, hey, I think our kids are 0:48:31.640 --> 0:48:35.719 on the same rowing team or something like that, or 0:48:35.920 --> 0:48:36.560 go to the same. 0:48:36.520 --> 0:48:39.840 Art class, or now I think our kids are the 0:48:39.840 --> 0:48:44.960 same hobby horse club. Are you at hobby horse thing 0:48:45.040 --> 0:48:48.480 the other day? 0:48:48.600 --> 0:48:48.839 Yeah? 0:48:48.960 --> 0:48:49.520 But I don't. 0:48:49.600 --> 0:48:52.040 I mean, I guess don't play dumb, although don't remember 0:48:52.400 --> 0:48:55.440 remember my boyfriend he had seen me. This is a 0:48:55.480 --> 0:48:58.640 little bit different, but it's like, why didn't you say 0:48:58.640 --> 0:49:01.040 that you had ever met me before? Because because I 0:49:01.040 --> 0:49:04.200 didn't recognize him, But he met me at Whole Foods, 0:49:05.160 --> 0:49:08.080 like over a year before we ever went out, and 0:49:08.120 --> 0:49:10.719 on our first date, he never brought that up, and 0:49:10.840 --> 0:49:14.279 I didn't recognize him. I didn't remember meeting him at 0:49:14.280 --> 0:49:17.880 Whole Foods, so I brought up like it's weird, Like 0:49:18.239 --> 0:49:20.680 he didn't tell me till the second day, and then 0:49:20.760 --> 0:49:24.600 I'm like, wait a second, well, okay, now I remember 0:49:24.680 --> 0:49:26.400 us meeting at Whole Foods. Why didn't you say that 0:49:26.440 --> 0:49:27.920 on the first date. And this is one of the 0:49:27.960 --> 0:49:30.120 things like he's heard on the podcast that he's like, 0:49:30.320 --> 0:49:32.400 I need to clarify some stuff and stand up for 0:49:32.440 --> 0:49:35.600 myself because on our first date, if I had said 0:49:35.600 --> 0:49:38.560 that to you, you might have been like, what, No, 0:49:38.760 --> 0:49:39.400 this is weird. 0:49:39.440 --> 0:49:42.799 Would you have thought it was weird? Maybe? Oh? 0:49:42.840 --> 0:49:46.120 But then by the second date, I was already liking him. 0:49:46.600 --> 0:49:49.720 So he's like I waited till I knew like, okay, 0:49:49.719 --> 0:49:51.920 I think she's into me, so safe I better. 0:49:51.760 --> 0:49:53.480 Tell you now. So it doesn't feel like he's like 0:49:53.480 --> 0:49:54.040 a stalker. 0:49:54.200 --> 0:49:56.319 Yes, okay, because he came up to me like yeah, 0:49:56.320 --> 0:49:57.879 because what he said to me at Whole Foods is like, hey, 0:49:57.880 --> 0:50:00.239 my kids and I listen every day. You'll do great 0:50:00.320 --> 0:50:01.840 job with the show. Okay. 0:50:02.120 --> 0:50:02.400 Yeah. 0:50:02.440 --> 0:50:04.520 Well, then if we're out on our first date and 0:50:04.520 --> 0:50:07.800 then he brings that up, I'd be like, oh. 0:50:07.200 --> 0:50:09.320 Yeah, I think your situation is a little different, just 0:50:09.360 --> 0:50:12.400 because it could come off that way. This is like, yeah, 0:50:12.520 --> 0:50:15.440 it's just bring it up because he either doesn't know 0:50:15.600 --> 0:50:18.040 or he doesn't know what to do either. Yeah. What 0:50:18.040 --> 0:50:19.359 if he's thinking the same thing and he's like, I'm 0:50:19.360 --> 0:50:20.920 glad you said something. I didn't know if I should 0:50:20.920 --> 0:50:21.600 say something or not. 0:50:22.520 --> 0:50:25.800 Okay, So so that answers that. Yeah, so say something, 0:50:26.280 --> 0:50:27.080 say it in the app. 0:50:27.320 --> 0:50:29.239 And if he thinks that's so weird that he's like, oh, 0:50:29.360 --> 0:50:32.239 I'm never speaking to you again, he's weird, Like, that's 0:50:32.239 --> 0:50:35.399 not a reason to not reply, right, Like you've dodged 0:50:35.440 --> 0:50:35.760 a bullet. 0:50:35.760 --> 0:50:40.520 If that's the case, screw him, kidding, not yet, No, 0:50:40.680 --> 0:50:49.440 not like that, like that okay, and we'll wrap with 0:50:49.520 --> 0:50:52.000 a we did an email the date, so we'll do 0:50:52.040 --> 0:50:56.680 a voicemail of the day. This is from Shannon in Colorado. 0:50:57.320 --> 0:51:03.000 She is talking about it Talks episode from a while 0:51:03.080 --> 0:51:07.080 back where one of our listeners had had a supervisor 0:51:07.200 --> 0:51:10.319 say that she shouldn't do a certain part of her 0:51:10.360 --> 0:51:14.239 job because she's a woman, and this is her thoughts 0:51:14.280 --> 0:51:16.399 on that, because this has happened to her as well. 0:51:16.719 --> 0:51:18.360 Here is the voicemail. 0:51:19.040 --> 0:51:21.440 Hi, Amy and Kat. My name is Shannon. I am 0:51:21.480 --> 0:51:25.200 from Colorado and I was just listening to the podcast 0:51:25.320 --> 0:51:28.960 in regards to the young lady who had a supervisor 0:51:29.480 --> 0:51:32.040 saying things about her and that she should not be 0:51:32.080 --> 0:51:34.719 doing work because she's a woman. I have had this 0:51:34.800 --> 0:51:38.480 situation happen as well, and I think I have come 0:51:38.520 --> 0:51:43.279 out of it by just asking the gentleman, so can 0:51:43.320 --> 0:51:46.040 you please elaborate on that and explain to me what 0:51:46.200 --> 0:51:48.399 part of my job you feel like I can do. 0:51:49.080 --> 0:51:52.919 So then that maybe he is thinking that your job 0:51:53.000 --> 0:51:57.240 consists of something else, or again, maybe he was joking, 0:51:57.480 --> 0:52:02.920 or maybe you know, if to assume what men's brains 0:52:02.960 --> 0:52:07.400 are thinking, and so I like it better just to 0:52:07.600 --> 0:52:10.040 come out and say, can you explain what you mean 0:52:10.080 --> 0:52:12.960 by that? And then that leaves it all in on 0:52:13.080 --> 0:52:16.520 their plate to explain how they were thinking or what 0:52:16.719 --> 0:52:21.440 their process was during that time. Thanks have a great week, So. 0:52:21.400 --> 0:52:21.799 There you go. 0:52:22.200 --> 0:52:26.319 That is from Shannon, and I like that. Just that 0:52:26.360 --> 0:52:29.080 can apply to if a man is saying that about 0:52:29.120 --> 0:52:31.919 you being a woman, or just any time you need 0:52:32.480 --> 0:52:36.440 clarity around something, to just pause and ask that simple 0:52:36.600 --> 0:52:37.160 question like. 0:52:37.120 --> 0:52:38.600 Could you elaborate? 0:52:38.760 --> 0:52:43.520 Elaborate? Can you further explain what you mean by X, 0:52:43.600 --> 0:52:47.360 y Z whatever they asked you? And then yes, it's 0:52:47.400 --> 0:52:49.759 the balls in their court and they have an opportunity 0:52:49.840 --> 0:52:51.600 to explain themselves. 0:52:51.800 --> 0:52:54.759 I like her curiosity how she was like, it's really 0:52:54.800 --> 0:52:57.799 hard to assume what men's brains are thinking, so she 0:52:57.880 --> 0:52:59.760 really is asking versus making assumptions. 0:53:00.160 --> 0:53:00.680 So thank you. 0:53:01.080 --> 0:53:04.839 Love that advice. Thank you Shannon, and y'all can call 0:53:04.880 --> 0:53:08.000 and leave us voicemails anytime. Eight seven seven, two oh seven, 0:53:08.200 --> 0:53:16.040 two oh seven seven, So voicemails, emails. We're attainable, reachable. 0:53:15.880 --> 0:53:19.680 Reachable, We're attainable. I guess we're both. Is that ironic 0:53:19.760 --> 0:53:20.480 or a coincidence? 0:53:21.160 --> 0:53:21.560 You pick? 0:53:23.320 --> 0:53:25.239 Okay, we have you had the day that you need 0:53:25.280 --> 0:53:30.919 to have? Follow us on Instagram Feeling Things podcast, right, Yeah, 0:53:31.600 --> 0:53:35.600 a fir change shit at Feeling Things podcast. Yes, yeah, 0:53:35.680 --> 0:53:37.439 it just felt weird. You know sometimes when you say 0:53:37.440 --> 0:53:38.520 something and it feels weird. 0:53:39.200 --> 0:53:39.719 Yeah. 0:53:40.200 --> 0:53:44.720 At Feeling Things podcast, Also on YouTube and TikTok. We're everywhere. 0:53:44.760 --> 0:53:49.279 See a Facebook. Oh Facebook too. Wow, Look at us, 0:53:49.320 --> 0:53:50.319 Look at us all grown up? 0:53:50.440 --> 0:53:53.440 Okay, bye bye