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Speaker 1: My psycho neighbor's screaming that she's going to unlive. I

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Speaker 1: think she has an even darker secret, and the police

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Speaker 1: are finally here to stop. I live in a duplex

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Speaker 1: in Washington State with my husband and my son. My

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Speaker 1: son is only a few months old. My father in

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Speaker 1: law owns half of the duplex and his rented.

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Speaker 2: Of his son owns a duplex at four months.

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Speaker 3: Wow, you know, just truly.

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Speaker 2: Is like sickin the Rockefeller.

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Speaker 1: My father in law owns half the duplex and is

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Speaker 1: renting it to us, and the other half is owned

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Speaker 1: by an older woman and her adult daughter.

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Speaker 3: My father in law has.

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Speaker 1: Known the woman for over fifteen years and told us

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Speaker 1: before we moved in that the daughter was mentally ill

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Speaker 1: and had strong delusions and on occasion caused trouble with

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Speaker 1: previous tenants. That is not a great thing to hear

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Speaker 1: going in the last tenants apparently had to get a

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Speaker 1: civil anti harassment order placed against the daughter, but eventually

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Speaker 1: they moved out when the behaviors still never stop.

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Speaker 2: Wow, So the daughter was so bad they made the

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Speaker 2: other tenant leave.

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Speaker 1: Yes, apparently the neighbor had accused them of kidnapping and

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Speaker 1: abusing their children and abusing their dogs. My husband and

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Speaker 1: I brought our son home a few months ago. We

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Speaker 1: didn't have any issues with the neighbor until about two

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Speaker 1: weeks ago. She began banging on and throwing things at

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Speaker 1: the wall when our son starts crying. She screams at

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Speaker 1: us as well, but I usually can't hear what she's

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Speaker 1: actually saying, you know, over the screaming baby and the

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Speaker 1: two dogs going absolutely ballistic because of her banging.

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Speaker 2: This sounds very unpleasant to the ears.

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Speaker 1: Rible symphony of horror, and it's made my postpart of

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Speaker 1: anxiety so much worse. Every time the baby cries, I

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Speaker 1: experience intense panic waiting for the screaming and banging to start.

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Speaker 1: So we've called the non emergency police line twice when

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Speaker 1: I can't handle it anymore and I feel close to

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Speaker 1: a meltdown. The first time they came, the police talked

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Speaker 1: to her and she stopped doing it as often, maybe

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Speaker 1: once every two days. Oh my god, that's less often.

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Speaker 1: Tonight she is back at it, and it's worse than ever.

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Speaker 1: The air quality is so bad right now from the

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Speaker 1: fires that I can't let the dogs out for long

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Speaker 1: to stop them from barking, and the barking makes the

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Speaker 1: baby cry harder, which makes a neighbors scream and pound

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Speaker 1: on the walls harder. It's a terrible like sloop. This

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Speaker 1: most Feisha cycle is Oh my god. The officer I

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Speaker 1: spoke with says that we can try to get a

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Speaker 1: civil anti harassment order placed, but he knew for a

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Speaker 1: fact that her behaviors never stopped after the last tenants

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Speaker 1: tried that, and he said his unofficial advice would be

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Speaker 1: to live somewhere else. Is that seriously my only option?

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Speaker 1: We can't afford to move, but I can't keep living

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Speaker 1: like this? There is an update. Is it worth it

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Speaker 1: just to get out of that scenario?

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Speaker 2: I mean, it depends how damaging financially it would be. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think, all things considered, probably worth it to leave.

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Speaker 2: That's what I would. I would love to know what

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Speaker 2: everyone else would do. Like, Yeah, I feel like in

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Speaker 2: this situation I would move out. I think I would,

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Speaker 2: even if it was like a little financially stressful. It

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Speaker 2: seems like the financial s must has to be less

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Speaker 2: than whatever this stress is. Update.

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Speaker 1: The pounding escalated over the next two months. The neighbor

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Speaker 1: bought a megaphone, to yell.

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Speaker 2: At us through the wall what the fret.

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Speaker 1: And threatened to rip us apart. She called us child predators,

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Speaker 1: and she'd yell obscenities and threats until three or four

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Speaker 1: in the morning.

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Speaker 2: Man, Okay, hate on this lady all you will, but

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Speaker 2: she got stamina. If you are fighting for some cause,

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Speaker 2: I don't care what you're fighting for, put her in

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Speaker 2: your picket line. It was just throw her, strike, bro,

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Speaker 2: she's on it. Get her at four in the morning.

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Speaker 1: Warner Brothers has given you whatever you want. So the

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Speaker 1: police were called multiple times. Nothing could be done about it.

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Speaker 1: One officer told us, I'm gonna kill you. See doesn't

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Speaker 1: mean anything if you don't actually know it. The elderly

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Speaker 1: mother hadn't been seen in months, but requests for wellness

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Speaker 1: checks were brushed off.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, all right, if you see what's coming. But

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Speaker 2: I see you in the comments ic USBU.

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Speaker 1: The general advice I got was that as renters, we

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Speaker 1: couldn't do anything. It was also sugges tested that this

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Speaker 1: was reasonable behavior since the baby crying was probably really annoying.

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Speaker 3: Who are these cops?

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Speaker 1: Since my first post, we moved in with my grandmother

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Speaker 1: for our safety. The neighbor ended up busting a softball

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Speaker 1: sized hole through the shared wall to stream at us

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Speaker 1: and occasionally just stare at us.

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Speaker 2: That's terrifying.

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Speaker 1: The smell that came out of the hole was indescribably bad.

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Speaker 1: Our security cameras recorded her coming to my son's nursery

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Speaker 1: window around two am almost daily and just staring at

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Speaker 1: him and holding her cat. It took until the end

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Speaker 1: of January for the police to be able to enter

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Speaker 1: her property.

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Speaker 3: The elderly mother.

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Speaker 1: Had been deceased since last June, and the daughter had

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Speaker 1: the corpse dressed in her Sunday best rotting in a

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Speaker 1: dead bolted bedroom.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I thought coming, I see U, I

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Speaker 2: see uic usbu.

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Speaker 1: The news article said that the mother died from natural causes.

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Speaker 1: The daughter was taken to an inpatient psychiatric facility. Wow,

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Speaker 1: this was a absolutely insane one.

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Speaker 3: I'm shook.

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Speaker 2: I'm shooks are expensive.

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Speaker 3: Though. Maybe she's just thrifty. She's just thrifty.

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Speaker 1: She's like, you know, I don't want to waste all

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Speaker 1: this money on AC. They've got an AC over there.

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Speaker 1: Let me just bust a hole in the wall and

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Speaker 1: just get some of that cold air coming in over here.

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Speaker 3: So they're still living in the grandmother's house.

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Speaker 1: Do you then move back, because now she's gone, there's

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Speaker 1: some ghosts there.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you're not You're not about it.

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Speaker 2: I'm not going nod. Someone died in the thing next

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Speaker 2: door and there was a crazy lady punching hole.

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Speaker 3: I'm not sure.

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Speaker 2: I want to go down memory lane again, like I

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Speaker 2: want to know, like when would it.

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Speaker 3: Have been too much?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, because like first it's banging, then it's megaphone,

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Speaker 2: then it's holes to the door, and then it's dead.

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Speaker 2: Grandma sends let us know in the commons.

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Speaker 1: I called the cops on my boyfriend's sister. I want

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Speaker 1: her kids in jail for their own good. Now she's

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Speaker 1: getting a felony, she might her kids. I've a whole.

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Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure.

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Speaker 1: That I'm the a hole. And I did not think

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Speaker 1: something this bad is gonna happen. They never do, They

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Speaker 1: never do.

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Speaker 2: They always think it's gonna be peaches and sunshine, but

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Speaker 2: literally they know it's gonna be shives and toilet wine.

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Speaker 1: And this happened about a year ago. Me and my

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Speaker 1: boyfriend have been together for five years. His sister, Claire,

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Speaker 1: has a one year old baby Alex. Claire's a single

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Speaker 1: mom and sometimes drops her baby off at our place

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Speaker 1: when she has some errands to run. I'm gonna be

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Speaker 1: honest here, I have no clue how to take care

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Speaker 1: of a baby. I play with the baby, but other

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Speaker 1: than that, my boyfriend usually takes care of Alex. My

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Speaker 1: boyfriend's work is on site. That means he's ready to

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Speaker 1: feed your I'm just kidding. So he usually isn't home

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Speaker 1: for four days and then he comes home for three days.

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Speaker 1: One day, Claire asked my boyfriend if she can drop

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Speaker 1: off Alex for the day. Boyfriend was supposed to leave

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Speaker 1: for work that evening. Since she said that she would

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Speaker 1: pick up the baby by that evening, he said that

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Speaker 1: would be fine. Big mistake, huge, So has been left.

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Speaker 1: Around five pm, I was waiting for Claire and I

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Speaker 1: kept calling her. She picked up the phone around eight

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Speaker 1: pm and told me that she went to a place

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Speaker 1: a few hours away with her friends. She told me

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Speaker 1: to tell my boyfriend to take care of Alex for

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Speaker 1: the next three to four days.

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Speaker 2: It's a long time. You can't just a long time.

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Speaker 1: Drop and me like, I just think him for the

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Speaker 1: next three for days. I told her that my boyfriend

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Speaker 1: already left for work. Then she just told me, ah,

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Speaker 1: then take care of Alex. I'm gonna be back in

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Speaker 1: for days.

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Speaker 2: Just leave a bowl of water out and some chicken bones.

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Speaker 1: And then she hung up the phone on me and

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Speaker 1: turned off her phone with the friend.

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Speaker 3: I freaked out hard.

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Speaker 1: I cannot call my boyfriend because he's unreachable on site.

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Speaker 1: Neither of us have family in the state that we

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Speaker 1: could have called. I called a few friends, but no

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Speaker 1: one gave me anything helpful. The bag she left with

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Speaker 1: Alex only had a few diapers left in it. The

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Speaker 1: baby was crying her head off, and I didn't even

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Speaker 1: know what to do to feed her safely.

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Speaker 2: What's with all these terrible parents.

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Speaker 3: I would just kind of go for it, just like

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Speaker 3: take a little spoon and just like.

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Speaker 2: Shovel out of the poops. No, no, feed the baby.

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Speaker 2: God damn.

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Speaker 3: I literally didn't know how else to do it.

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Speaker 1: So I called the police and I told them everything

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Speaker 1: that happened. They directed me to a social worker. While

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Speaker 1: the social worker was helping me take care of the baby,

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Speaker 1: the cops told other cops to find where she was located.

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Speaker 1: The cops found her high from plead and she had

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Speaker 1: enough on her for them to classify it as possession

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Speaker 1: with intent to sell.

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Speaker 3: Oh damn.

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Speaker 1: She like a serious charge, and I don't think she

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Speaker 1: actually sold anything. She probably just brought enough for her

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Speaker 1: and her friends for the next few days. She didn't

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Speaker 1: get any jail time. She had to do community service

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Speaker 1: and plead guilty. Unfortunately, that also meant that she got

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Speaker 1: a felony conviction.

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Speaker 2: Oh shure, Well, she didn't have to do jail time,

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Speaker 2: but this.

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Speaker 1: Got her fired and she has not been able to

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Speaker 1: hold down any good job since. In my defense, I

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Speaker 1: only wanted her to come back because I didn't want

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Speaker 1: anything to happen to Alex because I am not capable

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Speaker 1: of taking care of her. I did not think she

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Speaker 1: was going to do anything that would get her arrest.

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Speaker 1: In her defense, she has left Alex at our home

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Speaker 1: plenty of times, so it's not unreasonable for her to

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Speaker 1: think that it would have been no problem taking care

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Speaker 1: of Alex for a few days. Also, this was probably

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Speaker 1: the first time that she took a break for herself

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Speaker 1: since Alex was born.

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Speaker 2: Damn, she's just trying to let loose for a little bit.

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Speaker 1: My boyfriend was pissed in the beginning, but came around later.

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Speaker 1: Their parents also think I wasn't in the wrong. She

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Speaker 1: obviously hates me and thinks I ruined her life because

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Speaker 1: she just wanted to take a break for a few days.

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Speaker 1: This got brought up recently at a family dinner, which.

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Speaker 2: Is why I ask, am I the A hole?

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Speaker 3: Ladies and gentlemen.

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Speaker 1: There's a few things going on here, so I would

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Speaker 1: be very interested to hear if you think if OP

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Speaker 1: is the A hole or not, and maybe if you've

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Speaker 1: been in a similar situation before, any any drop in babysits.

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Speaker 2: I think the boyfriend's sister is an a hole, but

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Speaker 2: not a felony A hole.

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Speaker 3: I got misdemeanor A hole.

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Speaker 2: You know, it's kind of an a whole move to

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Speaker 2: just drop a kid off and say take care of

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Speaker 2: this thing, yeah, and then leave for four days and

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Speaker 2: turn off your phone. Like that's crazy.

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Speaker 1: It kind of seems like she intentionally did that so

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Speaker 1: they would have no option but to watch.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, yo, I'm going on this the vacation.

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Speaker 2: I don't care if you can't take care of the

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Speaker 2: kid like you are going to take care.

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Speaker 3: Of the kid.

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Speaker 2: Would I call the police, especially without first having like

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Speaker 2: talk to my boyfriend most likely not.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that feels like an a whole move too.

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Speaker 2: I feel like OP took the like I don't know

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Speaker 2: what to do.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what to do.

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Speaker 2: I don't know what to do, Like the cops just

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Speaker 2: busted down my door, and I think my girlfriend is

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Speaker 2: trying to get me arrested. But the police just found

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Speaker 2: out who actually set me up. My girlfriend and I

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Speaker 2: have been in a relationship for a bit over a year.

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Speaker 2: She stays at my house about seventy five percent of

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Speaker 2: the time. We've had no major problems before this point.

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Speaker 2: On Saturday night, we were watching TV in the living

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Speaker 2: room and suddenly there was loud pounding and shouting at

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Speaker 2: the front door. My immediate reaction was to call the police,

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00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:05,240
Speaker 2: but after a look out the curtains, I thought, who

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Speaker 2: police is the police? That's the question. At this point,

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Speaker 2: I was extremely confused. I don't sell, manufacture, or use drugs.

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00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:15,400
Speaker 2: I have no firearms in the house. I do nothing

254
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Speaker 2: illegal online. I don't even pirate Game of Thrones. Op,

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Speaker 2: it sounds like you're a freaking user.

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Speaker 3: Give some crimes into your bill.

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Speaker 2: God, Christ I had no idea why they might have

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Speaker 2: the reason to be knocking on my door on a

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Speaker 2: Saturday night. I opened the door and they immediately asked

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Speaker 2: for permission to search the premises.

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Speaker 3: Don't give them permission. Where's your warrant?

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Speaker 2: Literally like, where's your warrant? I was here just trying

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Speaker 2: to watch some freaking busy movies.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, legally.

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Speaker 2: I asked why they would think it was necessary, and

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Speaker 2: they wouldn't answer. In turn, I refuse to give them permission.

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Speaker 2: My girlfriend repeatedly said I should cooperate, I said, and

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00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,000
Speaker 2: told them to show me a warrant if they want

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Speaker 2: to enter the house. They then informed me that they

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Speaker 2: had probable cause and were searching my no matter what

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Speaker 2: I thought about the situation, and that they're asking was

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Speaker 2: only a formality.

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Speaker 3: I don't like that. Where are my rights? The first

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Speaker 3: thing they did.

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Speaker 2: After entering my house was pull my girlfriend and I

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Speaker 2: into separate rooms and began questioning us. I kept demanding

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00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:16,560
Speaker 2: they show me a warrant, but apparently warrant aren't even

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Speaker 2: a thing anymore, because probable cause can be literally anything.

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Speaker 2: When your local PD is backwater and shack enough sounds accurate,

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Speaker 2: I refuse to answer any questions. I told them I

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Speaker 2: wanted a lawyer and if I was under arrest. I

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00:12:30,120 --> 00:12:32,840
Speaker 2: repeated that I did not consent to any searches of

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Speaker 2: my property and repeatedly asked what their probable cause was.

284
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Speaker 2: That there was nothing readily apparent. Thank you, breaking bad,

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Speaker 2: which I am watching right now.

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Speaker 3: You're goddamn right.

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00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,720
Speaker 2: And they had no right to strip me of my privacy.

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Speaker 2: My girlfriend, on the other hand, talked a lot. I

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00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:49,760
Speaker 2: didn't hear much because she was in the next room,

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Speaker 2: but I overheard her say this, you should.

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Speaker 3: Check the backyard, said, I've never been in there before,

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Speaker 3: and I can't say what's in it.

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Speaker 2: It's like she's like trying to say there's like a

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Speaker 2: dead body in there. At the time, I can only think,

295
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,520
Speaker 2: what the fuck is she doing? Well, the police checked

296
00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:06,360
Speaker 2: the shed and found nothing. Again, I'm not a criminal,

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00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:10,439
Speaker 2: and after an hour plus hundreds of questions later, they left.

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Speaker 2: At that point, I asked why in the world would

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Speaker 2: she try to help them find criminal activity in my house,

300
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:18,760
Speaker 2: and she could only answer that she panicked and didn't

301
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Speaker 2: know what to do. I don't need legal advice. My

302
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:23,520
Speaker 2: mother is a paralegal and knows a lot of good attorneys.

303
00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:26,720
Speaker 2: She's furious about the police conduct, and she doesn't even

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00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:29,520
Speaker 2: know what my girlfriend said to them yet. I'm incredibly

305
00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:33,480
Speaker 2: angry at my girlfriend for saying something so unbelievably moronic,

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00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,880
Speaker 2: But all she can respond to me with is I

307
00:13:36,040 --> 00:13:38,640
Speaker 2: panicked and didn't know what to do. What I need,

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00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:42,000
Speaker 2: more than anything is another person's perspective on why someone

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00:13:42,040 --> 00:13:44,719
Speaker 2: would throw their significant other under the bus like that.

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Speaker 2: Does this seem like something that can be worked through?

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00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:49,600
Speaker 2: Or is this just a huge red flag? I can't

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00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:52,280
Speaker 2: buy that she was malicious. It really seems like she

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00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,600
Speaker 2: was just scared. There is an update, John, So like,

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Speaker 2: I understand being like scared, right, I think you reveal

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00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:01,400
Speaker 2: who you are in the moments where you are most

316
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:05,920
Speaker 2: frightened or stressed. Is she secret police? Is she undercover?

317
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,679
Speaker 2: But there is an update. Okay, let's get into it.

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00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:13,280
Speaker 2: This was a giant cluster. It wasn't my girlfriend that

319
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:14,839
Speaker 2: called the cops. It was my ex.

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Speaker 3: About a year.

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00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:18,280
Speaker 2: Before I met my current girlfriend, I was sort of

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00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,240
Speaker 2: kind of seeing this thirty five year old woman. A

323
00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:23,240
Speaker 2: relationship was primarily physical in nature, but she wanted me

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Speaker 2: to drop everything and move in with her.

325
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Speaker 3: Just about everyone I knew was.

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00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,080
Speaker 2: Telling me that there was something off about her, but

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00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,560
Speaker 2: I thought they were just judging her for her age.

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00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:34,160
Speaker 2: Then one night, when we had a fight, she chugged

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00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,600
Speaker 2: half a bottle of Kognac and I had to call

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Speaker 2: an ambulance because she was completely unresponsive.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god.

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00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:41,360
Speaker 2: I ghosted her after this and had to ignore her

333
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:43,480
Speaker 2: pounding on my door several times. I went to the

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00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:45,920
Speaker 2: police station about a week after they raided me to

335
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:48,480
Speaker 2: file a formal complaint. I had consulted a lawyer, and

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00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,280
Speaker 2: he advised me that it would be a good first

337
00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:52,440
Speaker 2: step if I were going to take legal action. When

338
00:14:52,440 --> 00:14:54,800
Speaker 2: I filed the complaint, I tried to get information on

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00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:58,040
Speaker 2: who falsely accused me of a crime that warranted a

340
00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:01,440
Speaker 2: raid without a warrant, but they wouldn't. My lawyer told

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00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:04,240
Speaker 2: me as much. Six months after the raid, I heard

342
00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:07,960
Speaker 2: through the grapevine that my ex friend with benefit's girlfriend

343
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,560
Speaker 2: called the police to inform them that I was cooking

344
00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:14,720
Speaker 2: crystal meth in my basement, breaking bad style. I only

345
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:17,120
Speaker 2: learned about this because a mutual friend who my ex

346
00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:20,400
Speaker 2: had recently confided in, spilled the beans. I figured out

347
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,960
Speaker 2: soon thereafter that she had seen me with my current

348
00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,800
Speaker 2: girlfriend somewhere and decided that I must have been cheating

349
00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:28,520
Speaker 2: on her when we were still together a year earlier.

350
00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:32,120
Speaker 2: She exacted her revenge by getting me squatted. I went

351
00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:34,160
Speaker 2: to the police station to file a report against her,

352
00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:36,520
Speaker 2: by the person at the front desk essentially was laughing

353
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:38,680
Speaker 2: me out of the building. When I consulted my lawyer,

354
00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:41,160
Speaker 2: he told me it was pointless to even bother. Maybe

355
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,680
Speaker 2: the better police department and in a better city. We

356
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:46,040
Speaker 2: moved out of butt Frackville, beautiful little town.

357
00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:46,640
Speaker 3: I love it.

358
00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:49,040
Speaker 2: We live in a much larger city now. I forgave

359
00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:51,680
Speaker 2: my girlfriend for her over talking to the police. Things

360
00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,160
Speaker 2: couldn't be better. I love her so much. One last

361
00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:56,400
Speaker 2: little happy note is that we were getting married next

362
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:59,600
Speaker 2: year and we were both incredibly excited about starting our

363
00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:02,200
Speaker 2: lives together. And that is a wrap. Wow.

364
00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:04,160
Speaker 3: I'm glad it all ended well.

365
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:06,480
Speaker 2: It all ended well, But I hope the police never

366
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:09,440
Speaker 2: question you again more you do anything remotely illegal, because

367
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:12,200
Speaker 2: you're you know your girlfriend is going to turn on you.

368
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:15,280
Speaker 2: She definitely wouldn't survive in a crime family for sure.

369
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:16,400
Speaker 3: Can't marry into the mob.

370
00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:19,880
Speaker 2: All mobsters off limits. My girlfriend has gotten me fired

371
00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,720
Speaker 2: from all of my jobs, I'll be homeless soon. I

372
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:25,000
Speaker 2: kind of want to leave her, but I'm not sure.

373
00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:27,640
Speaker 2: So am I the a hole. I'm male, twenty four

374
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,560
Speaker 2: and I've been with my girlfriend, female twenty nine. Let's

375
00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:33,120
Speaker 2: go out her Janis for two and a half years.

376
00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:36,000
Speaker 2: I just finished my education when we started dating, and

377
00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:39,240
Speaker 2: I have been doing all sorts of jobs since, sometimes

378
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,480
Speaker 2: two at a time. I did this to expand my

379
00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:45,080
Speaker 2: resume and gather job experience. I worked in cafes, bookstores,

380
00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:48,240
Speaker 2: a library, a grocery store, and as an English tutor.

381
00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:51,120
Speaker 2: Most of those jobs lasted about three to five months.

382
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:53,920
Speaker 2: My shortest s day was two and a half weeks,

383
00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:56,480
Speaker 2: my longest eight months. But since I didn't have a

384
00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:59,640
Speaker 2: hard time applying for new positions, I tried to block

385
00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:02,160
Speaker 2: it out, though it was kind of beating me up internally.

386
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:05,640
Speaker 2: People called to complain about me, People left bad reviews

387
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:06,040
Speaker 2: about me.

388
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:08,440
Speaker 3: People use my employee Wi Fi.

389
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:11,600
Speaker 2: Access to look up sketchy things on the internet under

390
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:16,760
Speaker 2: my name, what former employees called to inform them about

391
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:19,639
Speaker 2: me right name at all, and much more subtle stuff

392
00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:22,119
Speaker 2: than I couldn't disprove. But I was too anxious to

393
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:24,680
Speaker 2: do anything about it. I just told my girlfriend. She

394
00:17:24,840 --> 00:17:27,879
Speaker 2: comforted me, she supported me every time I got my

395
00:17:27,960 --> 00:17:31,080
Speaker 2: life ruined by these people, but I kept going though

396
00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:32,040
Speaker 2: they kept finding me.

397
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,080
Speaker 1: This feels like a conspiracy, right, Who is the scroup

398
00:17:35,119 --> 00:17:37,080
Speaker 1: of people conspiring to make sure.

399
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,360
Speaker 2: Time he goes to a new place? Or maybe it's

400
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:42,040
Speaker 2: just Opie is so unlikable. I mean every place he

401
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:45,400
Speaker 2: goes to, people are just like, yeah, that guy in particular.

402
00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:47,920
Speaker 2: Fast forward to this week. I currently hold a part

403
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,280
Speaker 2: time position in a bakery. I've been working there for

404
00:17:50,359 --> 00:17:52,560
Speaker 2: two months and a half. Is that like an English

405
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:54,280
Speaker 2: way of saying two and a half months? Two months

406
00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:55,840
Speaker 2: and a half and a half? I worked there for

407
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:58,320
Speaker 2: two months and a half, and please give him my tea.

408
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:01,320
Speaker 2: That's right, it's going okay. But my manager approached me

409
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:06,520
Speaker 2: about something regarding our Google reviews. Someone was complaining about

410
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:09,879
Speaker 2: an employee and their description of them could really only

411
00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:12,800
Speaker 2: fit me. It was on a day where we were

412
00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:14,679
Speaker 2: pretty short of staff, so I could have been the

413
00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,879
Speaker 2: only person in the store on that day for all

414
00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:20,639
Speaker 2: I know. Anyway, the review contained some pretty elaborate and

415
00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:24,120
Speaker 2: nasty comments about me. This happened on one or two

416
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:27,720
Speaker 2: of my jobs already. This has happened repeatedly, something which

417
00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:31,200
Speaker 2: is crazy. Like anyone that I know, I could destroy

418
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:34,760
Speaker 2: their reputation with a few emails. That's power, babe, that's

419
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:35,560
Speaker 2: kind of crazy.

420
00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:38,800
Speaker 3: That's power. That is that's power. I'm terrified now.

421
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:41,880
Speaker 2: I told my manager that it was all pretty bogus

422
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,520
Speaker 2: and that someone had a vendetta against me, as it

423
00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:47,080
Speaker 2: has happened before. She believed me and told me that

424
00:18:47,119 --> 00:18:50,000
Speaker 2: she'll dismiss the comment. On my break, I checked out

425
00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:53,040
Speaker 2: the review myself. Their username was kind of stupid. I'm

426
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:54,920
Speaker 2: not going to type it out here since I still

427
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:58,000
Speaker 2: worked there, but I'll just call them Mick Myrtle as

428
00:18:58,040 --> 00:19:00,400
Speaker 2: it was in the same range of sound. It's kind

429
00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:03,199
Speaker 2: of fake, but not really anyway. I come home, but

430
00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:04,679
Speaker 2: don't tell Janis about it.

431
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:05,480
Speaker 3: This is a girlfriend.

432
00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:07,280
Speaker 2: She has heard it all before, so I didn't see

433
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,840
Speaker 2: the point in complaining about another time I almost lost

434
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,760
Speaker 2: my position. We chat all as well, and she leaves

435
00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:15,920
Speaker 2: the room. Her phone is on the table and suddenly

436
00:19:16,119 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 2: she gets a notication or email of some sort from Google.

437
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:22,840
Speaker 2: I don't remember exactly what it said, but the pop

438
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:26,720
Speaker 2: up read something along the lines of Mick Myrtle. Manager

439
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:31,520
Speaker 2: has responded to your review. The girlfriend is Mick Myrtle.

440
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:36,120
Speaker 3: Mick Myrtle is the girlfriend. Oh my god, no wonder,

441
00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:37,040
Speaker 3: no wonder.

442
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,359
Speaker 2: But why why?

443
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:39,879
Speaker 3: That's the question.

444
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:43,119
Speaker 2: Why is this? Oh god, my heart dropped. I've been

445
00:19:43,119 --> 00:19:45,400
Speaker 2: trying to ignore it since this is two days ago.

446
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:47,800
Speaker 2: It just fit in the picture of bad reviews. It

447
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,439
Speaker 2: fit the picture of the phone complains my workplaces have

448
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,679
Speaker 2: received about me in the past. It fits the picture

449
00:19:52,680 --> 00:19:55,440
Speaker 2: of all the sketchy things I've been fired for. Why

450
00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:57,959
Speaker 2: would she do that? Though I'm looking for an explanation,

451
00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:01,840
Speaker 2: this literally can't be. She's the only thing keeping me sane.

452
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,359
Speaker 2: I don't know what to do. There is an update,

453
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:06,240
Speaker 2: but like I think there's this, like there's this, I

454
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:09,960
Speaker 2: forgot what the It's like some psychological complex where it's like,

455
00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:12,280
Speaker 2: you poison your kids so you can take care of them.

456
00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:12,760
Speaker 1: Huh.

457
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,560
Speaker 2: I think it's the equivalent, like she's making her boyfriend's

458
00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:18,600
Speaker 2: life hell so she can take care of him. Wow.

459
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:19,920
Speaker 3: That is terrible.

460
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 2: Man chaws and man man honey manage chosen mound. Child

461
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:28,200
Speaker 2: by proxy is a mental illness in a form of

462
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,520
Speaker 2: child abuse. The caretaker of a child, most often the mother,

463
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:33,240
Speaker 2: either makes up fake symptoms or causes real symptoms to

464
00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:34,800
Speaker 2: make it look like the child is sick.

465
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:37,639
Speaker 1: Honestly, I think that's a pretty good guess. I feel like,

466
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:39,720
Speaker 1: of what's happening? He yeah, because Yeah. The question is

467
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:40,920
Speaker 1: what is the incentive?

468
00:20:41,119 --> 00:20:43,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, she's an older woman wants I mean,

469
00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:44,280
Speaker 2: it seems like she just wants to take care of

470
00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:44,880
Speaker 2: him or something.

471
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:46,720
Speaker 3: It's just like this weird alone time.

472
00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:52,680
Speaker 2: Drain those balls, all worries. Wake up, nut, have breakfast, nut,

473
00:20:52,800 --> 00:20:55,480
Speaker 2: lunch nut, go to work, he come home, nut, lunch

474
00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:58,160
Speaker 2: break at work nut. Hello, people who are still invested.

475
00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:00,920
Speaker 2: I'm sorry for not updating you guys earlier. A lot

476
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:01,720
Speaker 2: has been going on.

477
00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:02,720
Speaker 3: I'm sure. Ope.

478
00:21:03,119 --> 00:21:06,639
Speaker 2: Yeah. First of all, yes, we broke up. That's why

479
00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:09,280
Speaker 2: I'll be referring to her as my ex from now

480
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:13,480
Speaker 2: on route of applause for oh huge, thank you God. Anyway,

481
00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 2: let's start from the beginning. On Monday of the following week,

482
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,680
Speaker 2: I couldn't take the uncertainty anymore. I told my ex

483
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:20,960
Speaker 2: I needed her booking account to book a train ticket

484
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,560
Speaker 2: to visit my dad for a few days. She complied,

485
00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,640
Speaker 2: and when she was in the shower getting ready for work,

486
00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:28,080
Speaker 2: I booked my ticket and started looking through her emails.

487
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,400
Speaker 2: After some digging, I found an email to herself which

488
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:34,320
Speaker 2: contained a spreadsheet file. I sent the file to myself

489
00:21:34,359 --> 00:21:37,679
Speaker 2: printer and took a screenshot. Why the spreadsheet contained about

490
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:42,640
Speaker 2: every single information about me. There was numbers, emails, passwords,

491
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:47,400
Speaker 2: work times, colleagues, their numbers, and social medias, as well

492
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,359
Speaker 2: as some emails passwords that she used for accounts to

493
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,959
Speaker 2: ruin my life with everything was on there conveniently sorted

494
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,720
Speaker 2: for her to ruin my life as efficiently as possible.

495
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:58,879
Speaker 2: When she left for work, I decided it would be

496
00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:01,040
Speaker 2: best to immediately pack my stuff. Okay, so he's like

497
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 2: and freakin' I'm leaving mode. Yeah, he was like a

498
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:10,200
Speaker 2: boy freaking mission. I'm pressing emergency EJAC going through the

499
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 2: sky for real, Nothing that mattered would be left behind.

500
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:15,679
Speaker 2: I feel like a wanted man, like I was being

501
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:18,359
Speaker 2: a hunted despite nothing being seeming out of place. I

502
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:20,399
Speaker 2: called my boss, told her I would be taking some

503
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,520
Speaker 2: time off work, and headed out to see my dad.

504
00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:25,080
Speaker 2: Needless to say, he was a sanity I needed. I

505
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:28,000
Speaker 2: cried about everything I saw. I panicked for a whole

506
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,440
Speaker 2: two days straight about how my life was ruined and

507
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:30,960
Speaker 2: I didn't know.

508
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:31,239
Speaker 3: What to do.

509
00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:33,359
Speaker 2: We had to sleep on the couch in the guest

510
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,560
Speaker 2: room because I was so scared of my ex coming in.

511
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,840
Speaker 3: He handled it like a champ. I love you, Dad.

512
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:40,920
Speaker 2: He called the police, a lawyer, and recently a therapist

513
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:43,040
Speaker 2: for me because I was in the most horrible state

514
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,600
Speaker 2: of my life. We're currently sorting out the legal stuff.

515
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,760
Speaker 2: I haven't talked to my ex except for letting her

516
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:50,880
Speaker 2: know it was over and that she's a sick psychopath.

517
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:54,160
Speaker 2: My dad handled the rest. I changed all my passwords,

518
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 2: and I'm now looking for a place to live. Sorry

519
00:22:56,640 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 2: for the brief update. My mind is tangled. Please ask

520
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:02,760
Speaker 2: your questions if you want answers. By the way, thank

521
00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 2: you to every single person who gave advice, talk to

522
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:08,080
Speaker 2: me over DMS, and was generally concerned about me. I

523
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:09,800
Speaker 2: appreciate every single.

524
00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:10,080
Speaker 3: One of you.

525
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:15,480
Speaker 2: Holy moly, damn dude, this is why you don't date women.

526
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:17,119
Speaker 3: End of sentence done.

527
00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:18,200
Speaker 2: This is this is.

528
00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:19,640
Speaker 3: Why you never date, never trust again.

529
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 2: Op, that is why me and Sam date each other

530
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:28,919
Speaker 2: podcast But yeah, damn that that would make me like

531
00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:30,800
Speaker 2: scared to ever be in a relationship again.

532
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:34,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, because like it like and you know, it's irrational.

533
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:38,000
Speaker 1: It's like obviously there's of all the people you would date,

534
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 1: this is not going to happen frequently, but it's just

535
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 1: like it's just gonna be hard to pull out of

536
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,960
Speaker 1: your mind as you're like talking and getting to know someone,

537
00:23:45,040 --> 00:23:46,359
Speaker 1: like now they know where I work.

538
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 3: Now they could go and do this to me.

539
00:23:48,240 --> 00:23:50,959
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, And it's like I mean she could still

540
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,960
Speaker 2: do this potentially, yeah, you know. Yeah, Like what do

541
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:56,520
Speaker 2: you say every before every job, Like, hey, there's someone

542
00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:59,920
Speaker 2: that wants to to like ruin my life all the time. Yeah,

543
00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:03,239
Speaker 2: Like come on, yeah, it's crazy that almost everyone in

544
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:06,000
Speaker 2: your life that you've ever known has the power to

545
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:08,719
Speaker 2: destroy it. I've never thought about it before. It's kind

546
00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:12,119
Speaker 2: of easy, Yeah, it really is. And anyone has, like

547
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:15,800
Speaker 2: any job that they have an employer for bruh, just

548
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,199
Speaker 2: write some bad Google reviews and say, oh, dude, the

549
00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:20,920
Speaker 2: guy with long blonde hair and blue eyes and dreamy

550
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 2: smile is a dick.

551
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,840
Speaker 3: My smile is dream That's all I heard.

552
00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 1: Also, I love how we like low Ki accidentally just

553
00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:31,280
Speaker 1: created the blueprint for like exactly how.

554
00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 3: To distress Like I know, crazy, this.

555
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:36,680
Speaker 1: Is like my childhood drug seminar where they literally told

556
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:38,399
Speaker 1: us step by step how to make a meth It

557
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:39,400
Speaker 1: was it was great.

558
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:41,240
Speaker 2: It was good, and you made it and it was.

559
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:41,960
Speaker 3: It was delicious.

560
00:24:42,040 --> 00:24:45,480
Speaker 1: I found divorce papers in my airvent. I don't know

561
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 1: what to do next, but my husband just got home.

562
00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:48,720
Speaker 2: Okay.

563
00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:52,200
Speaker 1: So I twenty nine female, and my husband, thirty male,

564
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 1: have been married for four years now and together for

565
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:59,919
Speaker 1: seven and it's going fantastically well. He's handsome, cute, kind, loving,

566
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 1: and he makes me feel safe, wanted and loved and protected.

567
00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 1: It always starts so sweet. He takes me on dates,

568
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:09,840
Speaker 1: shows physical affection wherever he can, and he also just

569
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 1: makes me feel happy. We have no kids, but we

570
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:14,560
Speaker 1: are trying for it. So the other day I was

571
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,280
Speaker 1: cleaning the house. I'm a housewife, and I was cleaning

572
00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,920
Speaker 1: the air vent at the top of the staircase aisle

573
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: because we had never cleaned it since we bought the house.

574
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:23,120
Speaker 3: Well, when I.

575
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:26,720
Speaker 2: Opened it, there was a box, an unmarked box. What's

576
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,000
Speaker 2: in a box? What's box?

577
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,560
Speaker 3: If you find something in an air vent? No one

578
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 3: was meant to find that.

579
00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 1: So I took out the box and then I opened

580
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:37,959
Speaker 1: it and there was a note more about it somewhere

581
00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 1: down below.

582
00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:40,639
Speaker 3: And what do you think it was? Sam?

583
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,320
Speaker 2: I mean, it's got to be the divorce papers.

584
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 1: It was divorce papers, yes, already with our names on it.

585
00:25:48,119 --> 00:25:52,040
Speaker 1: Oh the only thing that wasn't filled in was the signatures.

586
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 3: Oh God, I was crushed.

587
00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:56,920
Speaker 1: He had just gone to work after kissing me for

588
00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:59,800
Speaker 1: seven to eight minutes and hugged me, and everything has

589
00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:03,880
Speaker 1: been going great Saturday eight minutes. Dang, So why this?

590
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,000
Speaker 1: I open the note and it reads as follows. It

591
00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,920
Speaker 1: is with immense regret and sadness that your love between

592
00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:14,760
Speaker 1: you and my name has run its course. I'm sorry,

593
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:18,159
Speaker 1: Husband's name. You didn't deserve this, or you did. I

594
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:21,600
Speaker 1: don't know. Maybe she cheated, maybe you did. Maybe the

595
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:24,440
Speaker 1: love didn't last for you. All those times, all those

596
00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 1: moments of being with her are of no use. Now

597
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,800
Speaker 1: in the end, she did go away, or rather you

598
00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:34,720
Speaker 1: made her leave. She's gone, never coming back. It's okay,

599
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 1: you efing slur piece of sheet. You didn't deserve her

600
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,600
Speaker 1: in the first place. Dumb and stupid and delusional is

601
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 1: what you are, since you didn't push her away in

602
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:47,439
Speaker 1: the first place. You don't deserve love. You deserve to

603
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 1: be shot.

604
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,880
Speaker 3: Wait, I'm so confused. I'm lost.

605
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:55,360
Speaker 1: So the letter continues, or she cheated on you, I'm

606
00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:58,159
Speaker 1: sorry for that. She let another man's dong inside of

607
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 1: her and she didn't back off. She had an affair

608
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 1: physical or emotional, and she didn't choose you. Forget her,

609
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 1: forgive her, because to be amity is to be forgiving,

610
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 1: and you deserve the piece.

611
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:09,960
Speaker 3: My friend.

612
00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 1: You did everything that you could, but she wanted more.

613
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 1: Listen to we don't understand each other from st three

614
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:19,240
Speaker 1: and go to sleep. Hit the gym tomorrow. I'm here

615
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:22,720
Speaker 1: for you. Take care of mate. Yours yours writer's name.

616
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:26,560
Speaker 2: Okay, I am, I am. I'm still so confused.

617
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 1: His note was from himself, by himself and for himself. Oh,

618
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:33,879
Speaker 1: I am crying now. I've never cheated on him and

619
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 1: never had the thought of cheating on him.

620
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 3: All I want is him to be with me. What

621
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:38,200
Speaker 3: should I do?

622
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:41,120
Speaker 1: It breaks me to see how he thinks like this,

623
00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:42,280
Speaker 1: super super bizarre.

624
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:43,399
Speaker 3: There is an update.

625
00:27:43,520 --> 00:27:45,640
Speaker 2: Okay, I would love to get into this update because

626
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 2: I'm just I'm just I'm just confused.

627
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:49,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, what is your guess as to why?

628
00:27:50,240 --> 00:27:52,720
Speaker 2: Right now? And everyone put your guests in the comments. Well,

629
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:56,879
Speaker 2: I think he probably thinks that she's cheating. Yeah yeah,

630
00:27:57,040 --> 00:28:00,440
Speaker 2: or maybe it's like he has this just in case.

631
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:03,000
Speaker 2: It's like, okay, if she's cheating on you, you had

632
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 2: the divorce papers ready, and it's like always there at

633
00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:08,960
Speaker 2: a moment's notice. Oh, it's like okay, like you know,

634
00:28:09,320 --> 00:28:11,960
Speaker 2: like it's like it's almost like the nuclear option, like

635
00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:14,200
Speaker 2: right right, as soon as he cheats on you, I

636
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:15,400
Speaker 2: am the divorce papers.

637
00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:18,640
Speaker 1: Interesting theory, Yeah, that could definitely be it. But why

638
00:28:18,640 --> 00:28:19,280
Speaker 1: don't we find out?

639
00:28:19,359 --> 00:28:21,280
Speaker 3: Let's find out. So he came home.

640
00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 1: I was sitting on the couch with the box on

641
00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:27,640
Speaker 1: the coffee table. I mean, this is some thoughtfully like dude,

642
00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 1: he's busted. He tried to kiss me, but froze the

643
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 1: moment he saw the box. I broke down at that

644
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:37,000
Speaker 1: point because the thought of him not coming home to

645
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:39,880
Speaker 1: me every day broke me. He came to comfort me,

646
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:42,600
Speaker 1: but I pushed him away. I'm just crying and saying,

647
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 1: why why would you do this? You think you don't

648
00:28:45,360 --> 00:28:47,880
Speaker 1: deserve me, or you thought I effing cheated on you?

649
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:48,760
Speaker 2: He said nothing.

650
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:52,240
Speaker 1: After I calmed down, he said this. He had made

651
00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 1: the arrangements for this a contingency plan three to four

652
00:28:55,960 --> 00:28:58,920
Speaker 1: months ago when an office worker of his got cheated

653
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:02,920
Speaker 1: on and another office workers marriage failed as the wife

654
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,840
Speaker 1: didn't find the husband attractive or interesting anymore. And also

655
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:11,160
Speaker 1: that was coincidentally the same time he became a Reddit user.

656
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:14,520
Speaker 3: Way is he getting like red pilled right now? I

657
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:17,840
Speaker 3: think he's like getting red pilled? Oh no, oh, no,

658
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:19,840
Speaker 3: he having marriage.

659
00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 1: He started to get frightened about the issue as he

660
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:27,480
Speaker 1: read many posts on our slash surviving infidelity.

661
00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:30,840
Speaker 2: That is not a good place if you value your relationship,

662
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:34,760
Speaker 2: Oh my god, and also open marriages and relationships. He

663
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:36,720
Speaker 2: didn't tell me that he'd been using Reddit for the

664
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 2: last two months. He really tried to hold it in

665
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:42,040
Speaker 2: but failed, and he went to a lawyer and got

666
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:45,240
Speaker 2: the papers done just in case. He said that he

667
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 2: loves me to death and still finds me insanely attractive

668
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:50,880
Speaker 2: to the extent that he doesn't want to leave me

669
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 2: for one microsecond, and that if I were comfortable, he

670
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 2: wants to spend the rest of his life with me,

671
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:57,920
Speaker 2: but he just couldn't handle the thought of another man

672
00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:00,440
Speaker 2: even touching me. And he said that he just can't

673
00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:03,440
Speaker 2: even for his life share me with anyone, and that

674
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 2: I'm his and he's mine mine and mine alone, and

675
00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:08,120
Speaker 2: I'm his and only his.

676
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 1: We get it, buddy, we get it. He said he

677
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:13,280
Speaker 1: isn't trying to justify what he had done, and what

678
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:16,080
Speaker 1: he had done was wrong and unforgivable, but he said

679
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:18,640
Speaker 1: that he hopes I can understand the circumstance that made

680
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:21,080
Speaker 1: him do this, and that how much he doesn't want

681
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:24,520
Speaker 1: to lose me and can never ever share me with anyone,

682
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:26,480
Speaker 1: and that he loves me the most, and that he

683
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,360
Speaker 1: do anything for me and begged me to be transparent

684
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 1: when I'm bored in the marriage so we can talk

685
00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 1: about it and work through it and pull through like always,

686
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:37,040
Speaker 1: and for any reason that I feel upset or have

687
00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:40,360
Speaker 1: a problem with man, he is still like just going

688
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:41,719
Speaker 1: on about like nothing.

689
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 2: I mean, he's just probably spooked and it's not anything

690
00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:48,440
Speaker 2: I hope he did, but he's just feeling super insecure.

691
00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 3: Now.

692
00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:51,120
Speaker 1: That's what's so crazy, is like you kind of did

693
00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 1: this to yourself, bro, Like if you had just not

694
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:55,600
Speaker 1: gone to God and this happens all the time.

695
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:58,400
Speaker 2: What he should have done is he should have been like, Hey,

696
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:01,040
Speaker 2: I just want to talk to you some infidelity that

697
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 2: happened a couple times at work with like people I knew,

698
00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:06,080
Speaker 2: and then say what you said? Yeah, you know, like hey,

699
00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:08,720
Speaker 2: like I want to have open communication with you. Yeah,

700
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 2: but like, don't get the divorce papers already ready.

701
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,200
Speaker 1: At this point, we were both breaking down. He tried

702
00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 1: to come closer and touch and comfort me, and I

703
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,520
Speaker 1: let him. I wrapped my arms around him and didn't

704
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:20,960
Speaker 1: let go. We hugged forever and cried our hearts out.

705
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:23,440
Speaker 1: When he finally pulled back and he kissed me for

706
00:31:23,560 --> 00:31:24,480
Speaker 1: god knows how long.

707
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:25,640
Speaker 3: I don't want to lose him.

708
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 1: I love this man, and I want to be around

709
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:30,360
Speaker 1: him forever and ever. We fell asleep on the couch

710
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:32,240
Speaker 1: with me on top of him. We woke up and

711
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 1: had breakfast. Then we burned the divorce papers and the

712
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 1: note in our backyard and used the remnants of the

713
00:31:37,560 --> 00:31:40,040
Speaker 1: combustion to make manure for our plants.

714
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 2: That's nice, I guess that's kind of cute. It's like

715
00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:48,200
Speaker 2: growing new life out of what could have destroyed theirs. Yeah,

716
00:31:48,400 --> 00:31:52,320
Speaker 2: after that, we took a bath. Oh yeah, weaky clean

717
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,040
Speaker 2: after all that tear, and then.

718
00:31:53,960 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 1: We just snuggled. I never let go, and so did he.

719
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:59,600
Speaker 1: We held each other for hours until we were okay ish.

720
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 1: We got up and he made lunch while I hugged

721
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:03,760
Speaker 1: him from behind, and then we ate and snuggled. He

722
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:06,440
Speaker 1: fell asleep, and I'm typing this while watching him fall asleep.

723
00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:08,280
Speaker 1: He's still reaching out for me and his hand is

724
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:10,840
Speaker 1: on my thigh. We discussed and we'll consult a therapist

725
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:12,959
Speaker 1: for the both of us to counter the things that

726
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 1: he has in mind. The more I look at him,

727
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:18,000
Speaker 1: the more I smile because I know I found the

728
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 1: one for me. I guess that ended okay, and unexpected.

729
00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:26,080
Speaker 1: Usually we have an unexpected insane twist. This is an

730
00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:29,440
Speaker 1: unexpected kind of good twist. Yeah, I know we got

731
00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:31,480
Speaker 1: some divorcees watching this right now.

732
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:32,280
Speaker 2: I'm talking to you.

733
00:32:32,400 --> 00:32:34,640
Speaker 3: I'm talking to you right now. Ye'll be honest.

734
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:38,479
Speaker 2: We want to hear your story. Yeah, what how did that?

735
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 1: Or like maybe all near divorces divorces like kind of

736
00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 1: these big relationship hurdles.

737
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 3: And I'm curious also.

738
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 2: What you do in your relationship if you found divorce papers, if.

739
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,520
Speaker 1: You found these divorce papers, and I'm curious to ask

740
00:32:50,560 --> 00:32:54,320
Speaker 1: you all. And Sam was the husband the a hole

741
00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 1: for this move? Husband completely the a hole. I mean,

742
00:32:58,240 --> 00:32:59,800
Speaker 1: we kind of said it earlier. What he should have

743
00:32:59,840 --> 00:33:04,200
Speaker 1: done is it's okay to have these feelings of like insecurity.

744
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is part of the human experience. You will

745
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:09,960
Speaker 2: feel insecure, right, That's that's just how it is. But

746
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 2: when we feel insecure, don't bottle it up and go

747
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 2: to a fucking lawyer and get these divorce papers and

748
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:17,280
Speaker 2: talk to your partner.

749
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:21,720
Speaker 1: Also, I totally also see that op, like she read

750
00:33:21,720 --> 00:33:25,360
Speaker 1: this thing and was so hurt and then realized that like, oh, actually,

751
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 1: like he doesn't want to divorce me, and then she's

752
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:27,920
Speaker 1: just like kind.

753
00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:30,520
Speaker 3: Of bathing in the relief. Yeah, you know what I mean.

754
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 3: So I also totally are going.

755
00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:33,320
Speaker 2: To couple's counseling.

756
00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 3: That is true.

757
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:36,760
Speaker 2: So I feel like that is like it'll probably have

758
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 2: her vacations there and hopefully that will be uncovered, which

759
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 2: is a good, good idea on their part.

760
00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:43,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, totally.

761
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 2: My fiance wants to try and open marriage just before

762
00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:50,000
Speaker 2: we get married. I'm suspicious, but should I let them

763
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:53,000
Speaker 2: do it? Hi, I'm at a loss of what to do.

764
00:33:53,240 --> 00:33:56,440
Speaker 2: Me Female twenty five and my fiance, male twenty four

765
00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:59,360
Speaker 2: have been in a relationship for three years, four years

766
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:02,280
Speaker 2: coming up in mar He popped the question a few

767
00:34:02,280 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 2: months ago, and I was so excited, so cute, so naive,

768
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:08,839
Speaker 2: don't even know what's umboop until something else popped out

769
00:34:08,920 --> 00:34:11,840
Speaker 2: of him. I really feel like he is quote unquote

770
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,400
Speaker 2: the one. He's the one for me. He's amazing in

771
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 2: so many ways, and I genuinely feel like he feels

772
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:19,960
Speaker 2: the same way, or at least I did. Last night,

773
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:22,480
Speaker 2: we ordered takeout for dinner and we were going to

774
00:34:22,520 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 2: watch the newest Ring of Power episode. He was acting

775
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 2: incredibly weird, not very talkative, and very fidgety. He usually

776
00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:31,520
Speaker 2: sits pretty still or relax but he kept bouncing his

777
00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 2: leg and tapping his fingers. Eventually, about halfway through the episode,

778
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:37,800
Speaker 2: he pauses it and says he wants to talk about

779
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:40,920
Speaker 2: something extremely important. Taxes.

780
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:43,200
Speaker 3: Why on the road to Mortar they just couldn't have

781
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:44,840
Speaker 3: taken the eagles, That's important.

782
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,480
Speaker 2: He sounded so nervous, and I immediately got this sinking feeling,

783
00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,799
Speaker 2: but I told him everything was okay. Just tell me

784
00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 2: what's going on. He said it has been on his

785
00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 2: mind for a while, and he didn't know if it

786
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,600
Speaker 2: was just the nerves of realizing he's about to be married,

787
00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:00,480
Speaker 2: but he realized that I am his first qu unquote

788
00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:03,719
Speaker 2: real relationship. Before me, he had only dated a couple

789
00:35:03,719 --> 00:35:06,320
Speaker 2: people in high school and it was never long lasting.

790
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:08,680
Speaker 2: I asked him where he was going with this, and

791
00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:13,279
Speaker 2: he started crying like a little shy. He said he

792
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 2: was scared since he didn't have a lot of quote

793
00:35:15,280 --> 00:35:18,680
Speaker 2: unquote experience with other people, and he was worried if

794
00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,359
Speaker 2: he was making the right decision. Obviously, that effing hurt

795
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:23,759
Speaker 2: to hear, but I didn't say anything. After dancing around

796
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,520
Speaker 2: the subject for a bit, he finally just said what

797
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:29,600
Speaker 2: he was thinking, that an open relationship would be good

798
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 2: for us, at least for a little bit. Babe, I

799
00:35:31,760 --> 00:35:34,800
Speaker 2: just really think that would be sick if I could

800
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:37,920
Speaker 2: hook up with other bits. Honestly, the second half of

801
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 2: this conversation is a blur because my anxiety was so

802
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:42,800
Speaker 2: bad I was hardly listening.

803
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:43,359
Speaker 3: He said he.

804
00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:45,440
Speaker 2: Loved me, and he knows he wants to marry me

805
00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:48,160
Speaker 2: no matter what, but he wants to see what other

806
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 2: people were like before getting into a lifelong marriage. He

807
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 2: cried throughout the whole conversation, and he kept reassuring me

808
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:58,160
Speaker 2: that I wasn't the problem. He just wanted to quote

809
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 2: unquote experience other people since he was never really able to.

810
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:05,000
Speaker 2: He said, if I agree to an open relationship, there

811
00:36:05,040 --> 00:36:06,600
Speaker 2: would be a lot of rules in place and it

812
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:10,399
Speaker 2: would all be very safe. I feel like our relationship

813
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:13,560
Speaker 2: is ruined. I'm obviously not okay with an open relationship.

814
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:14,000
Speaker 3: He said.

815
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:15,920
Speaker 2: I could see other people too, but I don't want to.

816
00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:18,399
Speaker 2: I only have eyes for him, I only want him,

817
00:36:18,719 --> 00:36:21,960
Speaker 2: I only love him all. He kept saying, I have

818
00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:24,840
Speaker 2: every right to say no, and he would understand that.

819
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:27,160
Speaker 2: He would never make me do something I didn't want to.

820
00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:29,400
Speaker 2: But the thing is, since he brought this up, if

821
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 2: I say no, then I'm constantly going to think he's

822
00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:34,960
Speaker 2: seeing people anyway, it's already happening. I used to have

823
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:37,520
Speaker 2: complete trust in him, but now I can't stop thinking

824
00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:40,200
Speaker 2: if he's already seeing other people or at a minimum,

825
00:36:40,280 --> 00:36:41,359
Speaker 2: is he satisfied.

826
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:42,760
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it sounds like he isn't.

827
00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:45,440
Speaker 2: Maybe he's bringing this up because he cheated on me

828
00:36:45,640 --> 00:36:47,839
Speaker 2: and needs an excuse. Now I don't know. My mind

829
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:50,279
Speaker 2: is everywhere. I don't know what to do. I told

830
00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:52,080
Speaker 2: him I would think about it, and he hugged me.

831
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:54,520
Speaker 2: He didn't let go for a long time. I slept

832
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 2: on the couch last night and I told him I

833
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:59,800
Speaker 2: needed to be alone. Any advice is so appreciated, and

834
00:36:59,920 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 2: I do have an update. But first, what would you

835
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:05,359
Speaker 2: guys do in this situation if your significant other said, Hey,

836
00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:07,640
Speaker 2: I want to open a relationship right before you guys

837
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:09,600
Speaker 2: are about to get married, Joe, what would you do?

838
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:13,319
Speaker 1: That's a bit of a ball to drop, especially like

839
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:15,680
Speaker 1: he was the one that proposed.

840
00:37:15,760 --> 00:37:19,200
Speaker 3: You don't at that point stop and say, hmm.

841
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe I am not ready for this next level

842
00:37:23,680 --> 00:37:25,600
Speaker 2: of commitment because it feels like such a.

843
00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 3: It feels like a huge backtrack.

844
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:29,600
Speaker 1: I feel a huge bait and switch to be like, hey,

845
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 1: I want to get married, Like that is saying I

846
00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:34,759
Speaker 1: want you to be married to you, and I'd be like, oh,

847
00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 1: just kidding, I want to Like.

848
00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 2: The update isn't great? Oh God, he called off the

849
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:43,239
Speaker 2: engagement and broke up. He swears up and down he

850
00:37:43,239 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 2: didn't do anything, but he confessed he brought it up

851
00:37:45,520 --> 00:37:48,000
Speaker 2: because he had a crush on someone and wanted to

852
00:37:48,040 --> 00:37:50,080
Speaker 2: try it out. I'd been staying at a friend's house

853
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:51,480
Speaker 2: for a few days trying to figure out what I

854
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:52,840
Speaker 2: wanted to do. A lot of the people in the

855
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:55,000
Speaker 2: commons were a huge help to me and help me

856
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:57,800
Speaker 2: mentally prepare. I appreciate a lot of you so much.

857
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:00,160
Speaker 2: I probably wouldn't have gone through with it, but you

858
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:02,560
Speaker 2: guys pushed me to ask more questions. I asked him

859
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:05,080
Speaker 2: what made him start thinking about it, and at first

860
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 2: he went back to his experience bullshit. I told him,

861
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:10,239
Speaker 2: if he wanted to experiment sexually, I would be more

862
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:12,479
Speaker 2: than happy to try some things out, and I wasn't

863
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:15,240
Speaker 2: going to be accepting that as an answer. After a while,

864
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:18,320
Speaker 2: he caved in and admitted that a girl who works

865
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 2: at a coffee shoppy visits often asked him for his number,

866
00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:23,719
Speaker 2: and that's when he started to think about it. I

867
00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:26,360
Speaker 2: was heartbroken and angry, to say the least. He said

868
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:29,200
Speaker 2: that if we had gotten into an open relationship, people

869
00:38:29,280 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 2: we knew would be off limits. He said she didn't

870
00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:33,960
Speaker 2: count as somebody knew because he wasn't friends with her

871
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 2: and she was still technically a stranger.

872
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 3: Of course, I told him he did know her.

873
00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:41,040
Speaker 2: He goes there almost every day and she's very friendly

874
00:38:41,080 --> 00:38:43,200
Speaker 2: with us. But either way it didn't matter because he

875
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:45,160
Speaker 2: had already told me there was no one he had

876
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 2: in mind. He lied to me. After some more arguing,

877
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 2: crying from both of us, he told me, if I

878
00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:53,360
Speaker 2: didn't want the open relationship, then just say no and

879
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:55,920
Speaker 2: we could move on from this. He was basically begging

880
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 2: me not to talk about it anymore. He just wanted

881
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:00,879
Speaker 2: to move on. I told him it was easy because

882
00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:03,319
Speaker 2: I straight up do not trust him anymore. As far

883
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 2: as I know, he could have already experimented with her.

884
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:08,600
Speaker 2: He said he would never go to that coffee please again,

885
00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:10,759
Speaker 2: and if he saw her, he would ignore her. I

886
00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:13,600
Speaker 2: told him he could see other people. I just wouldn't

887
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:15,640
Speaker 2: be in the picture. He got frantic and asked me

888
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:18,280
Speaker 2: if I was breaking up with him. I said yes.

889
00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:20,440
Speaker 2: I told him a year from now, or even a

890
00:39:20,440 --> 00:39:22,560
Speaker 2: couple of years from now, after he gets all his

891
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 2: quote unquote experience out of his system, and if I'm

892
00:39:25,719 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 2: still single and interested, we can try again. From the beginning,

893
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:31,760
Speaker 2: no engagement. I personally don't see us getting back together,

894
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,000
Speaker 2: but he was crying and clinging on to me. Honestly,

895
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:39,600
Speaker 2: I'm disgusted. I'm mostly sad, though heartbroken, pissed off, lost, confused, anxious.

896
00:39:39,920 --> 00:39:42,719
Speaker 2: We had our whole life planned out and ready for us,

897
00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:45,560
Speaker 2: and it got ruined by a stupid effing crush he

898
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:48,080
Speaker 2: had the nerve to ask to try out because of

899
00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:50,279
Speaker 2: lack of experience. I'm heading out in a bit to

900
00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:52,440
Speaker 2: get drunk with some girlfriends. I know a few people

901
00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 2: want an update. Sorry, it wasn't very happy. Thank you

902
00:39:55,080 --> 00:39:58,520
Speaker 2: for all the advice. Nine it's over. But I don't know, Like,

903
00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 2: I think that brings up a good question what would

904
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,239
Speaker 2: you And we kind of answered a little bit before,

905
00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:05,080
Speaker 2: but what would you do if your significant other asked

906
00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:07,440
Speaker 2: for an open relationship? It's hard to take it a

907
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:09,759
Speaker 2: good way, honestly, Yeah, I be other person, like the

908
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:12,240
Speaker 2: person receiving it. I think it would be pretty hard

909
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 2: not to have your relationship falter. But I don't necessarily

910
00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:18,920
Speaker 2: see it as like a moral failing. Yeah, in terms

911
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 2: of preserving the strength of the relationship, probably not a

912
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 2: good move.

913
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:24,799
Speaker 1: It just makes so much more sense if you're polyamorous

914
00:40:24,840 --> 00:40:27,839
Speaker 1: going into the relationship mid relationship. I'm sure people have

915
00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:31,440
Speaker 1: done it, of course. I don't objectively think there's anything

916
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:33,840
Speaker 1: wrong with it per se, But yeah, it's it's just

917
00:40:33,920 --> 00:40:36,279
Speaker 1: one of those things that it's just so hard not

918
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:39,360
Speaker 1: to take personally, because what do you instantly do? You're like,

919
00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:41,279
Speaker 1: what do I have that's not?

920
00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:42,680
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah? Yeah?

921
00:40:42,680 --> 00:40:45,279
Speaker 2: Why am I not enough for you? But I would

922
00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:46,960
Speaker 2: be very curious what everyone else thinks. I don't know

923
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 2: if there's necessarily a right answer. I don't think so,

924
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:51,560
Speaker 2: but there are multiple answers, and we want to know.

925
00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:55,040
Speaker 1: I was just diagnosed with terminal cancer, so I'm going

926
00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:58,280
Speaker 1: to work up the nerve to reconnect with my first love.

927
00:40:58,360 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 3: But I haven't told my husband.

928
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:02,080
Speaker 2: Am I the a whole sounds like a little bit

929
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,480
Speaker 2: of cheating, But you are dying for starters.

930
00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:07,799
Speaker 1: I thirty two female, am dying due to cancer. It

931
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:11,320
Speaker 1: was diagnosed pretty late, after two weeks of severe stomach

932
00:41:11,320 --> 00:41:14,120
Speaker 1: pain and throwing up after every meal. At the stage

933
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:17,480
Speaker 1: that I'm in, doctors have suggested palliative care, which is

934
00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:21,480
Speaker 1: treating the symptoms versus the core illness itself, rather than

935
00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:24,960
Speaker 1: any treatments, which I am sad about, but that is life.

936
00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,279
Speaker 1: I am from one of those countries where marriage is

937
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:29,919
Speaker 1: arranged rather than the Western way. I was in love

938
00:41:29,960 --> 00:41:33,040
Speaker 1: with someone a when I was about eighteen to nineteen

939
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:34,920
Speaker 1: years old, though he was from the same country.

940
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:35,439
Speaker 2: As I am.

941
00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:37,799
Speaker 1: My parents did not agree to it due to his

942
00:41:37,920 --> 00:41:41,799
Speaker 1: economic background, which was a few steps below us. My

943
00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 1: parents fixed up my marriage with my husband B, and

944
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 1: we have been married.

945
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 3: For twelve years now. We don't have any kids.

946
00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:50,520
Speaker 1: B doesn't know about A as my ex boyfriend, but

947
00:41:50,640 --> 00:41:53,400
Speaker 1: does know A as he is quite well known in

948
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:55,480
Speaker 1: our small city. He has never asked me about my

949
00:41:55,520 --> 00:41:58,560
Speaker 1: previous love affairs, since that's very taboo in my culture,

950
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:02,240
Speaker 1: and I lied by mission question mark. A remained single

951
00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:04,600
Speaker 1: and is now a professor in our local university.

952
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:05,719
Speaker 3: He has gained quite a.

953
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:08,680
Speaker 1: Name by mentoring young people and directing them in the

954
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:10,479
Speaker 1: right studies slash career path.

955
00:42:10,560 --> 00:42:13,399
Speaker 2: That is awesome. Sounds like a sick dude. Yeah. Now,

956
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:15,080
Speaker 2: I have done everything I need to do.

957
00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:17,880
Speaker 1: My legal and financial stuff is all sorted, and I

958
00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:20,160
Speaker 1: have spoken to my husband on what I need him

959
00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:22,360
Speaker 1: to do get married again. I don't think of it

960
00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:24,719
Speaker 1: as a betrayal to my memory and don't ask if

961
00:42:24,719 --> 00:42:25,799
Speaker 1: my parents are okay.

962
00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:28,080
Speaker 3: With it, et cetera. So I'm guessing giving the go ahead.

963
00:42:28,239 --> 00:42:31,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, now, with people walking around me in eggshells, I've

964
00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:33,560
Speaker 1: been thinking a lot about A, and I really want

965
00:42:33,560 --> 00:42:35,800
Speaker 1: to spend more time with him a couple hours and

966
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:38,120
Speaker 1: half a meal and walk down memory lane if he

967
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:38,759
Speaker 1: was willing to.

968
00:42:38,760 --> 00:42:39,200
Speaker 3: Of course.

969
00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:41,920
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know. I feel like, do what

970
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:44,719
Speaker 1: you like. On the other hand, I feel selfish. My

971
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:47,439
Speaker 1: husband worships the ground I walk on, and I love him.

972
00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:50,240
Speaker 1: But A is like that childhood crush on your favorite

973
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:53,240
Speaker 1: actor of sportsman or first love in high school, which

974
00:42:53,400 --> 00:42:54,520
Speaker 1: would be stored.

975
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 3: In a tiny corner of your heart and brings you

976
00:42:56,280 --> 00:42:57,160
Speaker 3: a wistful smile.

977
00:42:57,440 --> 00:42:59,560
Speaker 1: I am just conflicted if I would be the a

978
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 1: whole if I tell my husband about A and this

979
00:43:02,120 --> 00:43:04,880
Speaker 1: wish of mine. Note, my intention is to just have

980
00:43:04,920 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 1: a chat and a meal just him. I've had two

981
00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:11,120
Speaker 1: palliative surgeries and I have two bags in my lower tummy,

982
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:14,520
Speaker 1: so nothing physical or like an affair, and it would

983
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 1: be in my own home. So this is a story

984
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:22,160
Speaker 1: that definitely seems sticky on the outset, right, But I

985
00:43:22,160 --> 00:43:25,520
Speaker 1: don't know what do you all think, Like, what should

986
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:27,440
Speaker 1: OP do in this scenario?

987
00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:29,759
Speaker 2: I mean, you're dying, It's like you should be.

988
00:43:29,719 --> 00:43:33,040
Speaker 1: Able to have that and it shouldn't be hurtful at all,

989
00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:35,120
Speaker 1: unless I don't has insecurities.

990
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:37,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think it would feel worse for you

991
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:40,120
Speaker 2: not to tell him and then for him to find out.

992
00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:41,960
Speaker 1: Give her as much joy as you can, you know,

993
00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:43,400
Speaker 1: and this seems like something you would bring her a

994
00:43:43,400 --> 00:43:43,879
Speaker 1: lot of joy.

995
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:45,480
Speaker 2: I mean, let us know what you would do in

996
00:43:45,520 --> 00:43:48,840
Speaker 2: this situation in both the husband's shoes and op shoes.

997
00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:51,880
Speaker 3: I don't care that your grandma's dead. Little girl?

998
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:54,280
Speaker 2: Am I the a hole? So I thirty eight beemalle

999
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:58,239
Speaker 2: to have five kids, all internationally adopted, as I am infertile.

1000
00:43:58,280 --> 00:44:01,120
Speaker 2: This in particular, is about one of my daughter's nine

1001
00:44:01,160 --> 00:44:03,480
Speaker 2: female I will call Zoe as it starts with the

1002
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:05,360
Speaker 2: same letter as her real name. You don't need to

1003
00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,440
Speaker 2: give us clues as to what her real name is.

1004
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:10,840
Speaker 2: Stop it. Zoe just entered fourth grade. She's going to

1005
00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:13,680
Speaker 2: school in person this year. Well, one girl I'll call

1006
00:44:13,719 --> 00:44:16,399
Speaker 2: her Cat has been picking on Zoe a lot. I'm

1007
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,480
Speaker 2: not one of those moms who makes a huge fuss

1008
00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:21,280
Speaker 2: over every little squabble, but Cat has picked on Zoe

1009
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 2: for being adopted, being Asian, and started rumors that she

1010
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:29,360
Speaker 2: has the virus. Cat sounds like a little bigot yep.

1011
00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:32,240
Speaker 2: Every time Zoe tries to tell her teacher her teacher

1012
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:35,439
Speaker 2: either brushes it off as quote unquote conflict or says

1013
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:37,279
Speaker 2: that Kat is dealing with a lot and not to

1014
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:40,000
Speaker 2: mind her, even though that is very hard for Zoe.

1015
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:43,600
Speaker 2: Shouldn't the teacher be like, stop saying that racist. I

1016
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:46,000
Speaker 2: have learned with one of my older kids, to document

1017
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 2: every incident of bullying that happens to my child. I

1018
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:50,600
Speaker 2: just write down the date and what they say happen

1019
00:44:50,680 --> 00:44:52,879
Speaker 2: in an oepook. It usually turns out to be nothing.

1020
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:55,319
Speaker 2: I've done this for what Zoe has said about Cat. Well,

1021
00:44:55,520 --> 00:44:58,160
Speaker 2: last week was the final straw. I got called by

1022
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:00,600
Speaker 2: the nurse that Zoe had fallen out of a tree

1023
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:03,400
Speaker 2: at recess and hurt her arm and she had to

1024
00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,359
Speaker 2: go to urgent care. I picked her up as soon

1025
00:45:05,360 --> 00:45:06,839
Speaker 2: as I could, and when we got in the car,

1026
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 2: she said what really happened was Kat told her if

1027
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 2: she climbed up the tree, she would let her sit

1028
00:45:12,160 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 2: on the class bean bag or something like that. When

1029
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:17,359
Speaker 2: Zoe did it, Kat began shaking the other end of it.

1030
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 2: When Zoe fell out of the tree, Kat ran away.

1031
00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:22,719
Speaker 2: When her teacher got there, she tried to tell him

1032
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:26,239
Speaker 2: what happened, but he scolded her for climbing up there,

1033
00:45:26,320 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 2: granted he didn't know how bad it was, and took

1034
00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:30,600
Speaker 2: her to the nurse. Her wrist was broken because I

1035
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:32,919
Speaker 2: guess she tried to catch herself from falling and ended

1036
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:36,440
Speaker 2: up twisting it backwards. After she was home with my husband,

1037
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:39,239
Speaker 2: I marched into that school pissed off. I ended up

1038
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:41,480
Speaker 2: having a meeting with the guidance counselor and her teacher.

1039
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:44,279
Speaker 2: Her teacher kept trying to call it a fight or

1040
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:48,600
Speaker 2: a conflict, giving them equal blame. Basically, what is this conflict?

1041
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:50,600
Speaker 3: Bro result conflict?

1042
00:45:50,640 --> 00:45:53,279
Speaker 2: Come on? Or saying that she shouldn't have climbed the

1043
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 2: tree in the first place. Then he said that in

1044
00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:58,000
Speaker 2: the beginning of the year, Kat's parents told him that

1045
00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:00,799
Speaker 2: her grandma died over the summer. Caught her a let

1046
00:46:00,880 --> 00:46:01,879
Speaker 2: all slack.

1047
00:46:01,680 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: Bro So we cut the girl whose grandpa passed away,

1048
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:06,240
Speaker 1: but not the girl.

1049
00:46:06,080 --> 00:46:09,520
Speaker 2: Who broke her literally the other one broke her wrist. Also,

1050
00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:12,239
Speaker 2: grandma's be passing away left and right. If I had

1051
00:46:12,239 --> 00:46:14,080
Speaker 2: a nickel for every one of my friends who had

1052
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,560
Speaker 2: a dead grandma, I would have a lot of nichols.

1053
00:46:16,719 --> 00:46:19,920
Speaker 2: I said, I didn't care, and she should still be punished.

1054
00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:22,279
Speaker 2: He seems shocked that I said I didn't care. He

1055
00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:24,479
Speaker 2: has all this week off, so I've taken a little

1056
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 2: time to cool off. And now I'm not sure if

1057
00:46:26,560 --> 00:46:30,320
Speaker 2: I'm the youngful for saying that. So am I the ahole?

1058
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:32,920
Speaker 2: I want to know what you think if your child's

1059
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:36,080
Speaker 2: bully and literally cause them to break their wrists, but

1060
00:46:36,239 --> 00:46:39,879
Speaker 2: their grandma died, would you change how you treat the kid?

1061
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,880
Speaker 2: Do you get dead grandma immunity? That's the real question.

1062
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:44,400
Speaker 2: I want to know what you think. But your answers

1063
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:47,359
Speaker 2: in the comments are right this second, you little beautiful children, John,

1064
00:46:47,400 --> 00:46:47,839
Speaker 2: what do you think?

1065
00:46:48,000 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 1: Let's say the school staff is just totally like totally disengaged, right,

1066
00:46:51,560 --> 00:46:56,439
Speaker 1: but they're engaged in defending the girl who lost her grandmother.

1067
00:46:56,160 --> 00:46:58,200
Speaker 3: Dead grandma immunity for the summer.

1068
00:46:58,840 --> 00:46:59,440
Speaker 2: I forgot.

1069
00:46:59,480 --> 00:47:03,480
Speaker 1: Here's your allowed racism and bullying card for having a

1070
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:04,080
Speaker 1: dead grandma.

1071
00:47:04,120 --> 00:47:06,480
Speaker 3: Here, here's your past. Like, No, that's not how the

1072
00:47:06,480 --> 00:47:07,080
Speaker 3: world works.

1073
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:09,759
Speaker 2: No, it's not. If you're racist as a six year old,

1074
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:12,759
Speaker 2: I'm not saying it's taught, but I am.

1075
00:47:12,920 --> 00:47:13,080
Speaker 3: On.

1076
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:18,759
Speaker 2: Grandma's probably racist too. Drop it, so your ta grandma.

1077
00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:19,480
Speaker 2: That's my take.

1078
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:22,840
Speaker 3: Let us know your take. But your answers and the

1079
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 3: comments below.

1080
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:27,120
Speaker 1: My mom wants to shock my service dog into submission.

1081
00:47:27,280 --> 00:47:29,120
Speaker 2: I have a plan to set my pup free.

1082
00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 1: Am I the a whole? Yes, I am aware of

1083
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:34,640
Speaker 1: how weird the title is. And I'm on mobile and

1084
00:47:34,680 --> 00:47:36,920
Speaker 1: I can never spell right and I suck a punctuation.

1085
00:47:37,160 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 3: Oh he is self esteem cod Come on.

1086
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:43,320
Speaker 1: But I twenty one female, still live with my parents,

1087
00:47:43,520 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 1: and I have a self trained service dog and my

1088
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:49,759
Speaker 1: parents have a little non service dog. My dog does

1089
00:47:49,880 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 1: bark quite a bit, but it's very easy to make

1090
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:54,279
Speaker 1: him stop, and he doesn't do it often when on

1091
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:56,640
Speaker 1: the job unless someone gets too close to me. And

1092
00:47:56,680 --> 00:47:59,120
Speaker 1: I'm perfectly fine with that, as I don't like people

1093
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:02,040
Speaker 1: that close to me. Now, my dog's bark isn't at

1094
00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:03,520
Speaker 1: all a normal bark.

1095
00:48:04,840 --> 00:48:05,840
Speaker 3: It takes our barking.

1096
00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:09,520
Speaker 1: It sounds more like he's screaming the bark, and it's

1097
00:48:09,640 --> 00:48:12,600
Speaker 1: very loud. And my parents' dog also barks, and she

1098
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:15,880
Speaker 1: barks way more than my dog at home and in public,

1099
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:19,440
Speaker 1: and she barks very often at everything. For example, she

1100
00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:21,400
Speaker 1: barks at my dog to try to get him to

1101
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,920
Speaker 1: play with her. She barks at my dog every single

1102
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:27,839
Speaker 1: time he gets solo attention. She barks at everyone she sees. Well,

1103
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:30,319
Speaker 1: I mean that sounds like a classic, like yeappy dog.

1104
00:48:30,600 --> 00:48:32,200
Speaker 3: She does not have a loud bark at all.

1105
00:48:32,239 --> 00:48:34,800
Speaker 1: It's a very normal bark in volume, but her barks

1106
00:48:34,840 --> 00:48:37,680
Speaker 1: are very high pitched and they hurt your ears. But

1107
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:40,840
Speaker 1: my parents' dog does not listen to anyone, and you

1108
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:44,880
Speaker 1: absolutely cannot get her to stop barking once she starts.

1109
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:47,680
Speaker 2: That dog is independent. His f don't need no human.

1110
00:48:47,840 --> 00:48:50,279
Speaker 1: My mom hates my dog's bark because I can't take

1111
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,279
Speaker 1: him with me to work. I work with food in

1112
00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:54,239
Speaker 1: a kitchen. My mom has to watch him for me.

1113
00:48:54,280 --> 00:48:56,640
Speaker 1: My mom has told me over and over that she

1114
00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:58,600
Speaker 1: was going to get a shock callar to put on

1115
00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:01,480
Speaker 1: my dog, and I have coursed over and over again

1116
00:49:01,760 --> 00:49:02,319
Speaker 1: that she's not.

1117
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:03,800
Speaker 2: Allowed to do that to my dog.

1118
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:07,359
Speaker 1: Darn well, she went ahead and bought one anyways and

1119
00:49:07,520 --> 00:49:10,440
Speaker 1: started making my dog wear it, claiming that it doesn't

1120
00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:13,000
Speaker 1: actually shock him. My mom put it on him while

1121
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:15,360
Speaker 1: I'm at work, and even tried while I'm home, and

1122
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: I've seen his reaction to the collar and it very

1123
00:49:17,680 --> 00:49:20,440
Speaker 1: clearly hurts him. So while she was gone on a vacation,

1124
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:22,719
Speaker 1: I threw it into my car and left it there,

1125
00:49:23,040 --> 00:49:25,880
Speaker 1: and she absolutely knows I hit it and is constantly

1126
00:49:25,960 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 1: looking slash demanding to know where is it now. She's

1127
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:31,400
Speaker 1: been saying that she'll just buy a new one, and

1128
00:49:31,480 --> 00:49:33,640
Speaker 1: I really don't want her to waste any more money

1129
00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:36,239
Speaker 1: on it, especially since I'm going to definitely hide the

1130
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,560
Speaker 1: new one when she gets it. So am I the

1131
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:41,720
Speaker 1: Alpha Sierra Sierra Hotel oscar Lima Echo.

1132
00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:42,959
Speaker 2: Did they just say that?

1133
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 3: They literally said that?

1134
00:49:44,560 --> 00:49:48,799
Speaker 2: Why they tried to say they're in the military, or I.

1135
00:49:48,760 --> 00:49:50,239
Speaker 3: Think it's a joke. All right, really quick.

1136
00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:53,960
Speaker 2: Someone made the nicest, meanest comment the other day.

1137
00:49:54,239 --> 00:49:57,240
Speaker 1: I love nice, mean comments, mean comments I love the most.

1138
00:49:57,080 --> 00:50:03,520
Speaker 2: So Amanda Heinsen thirty two, not a public subscriber. So

1139
00:50:03,560 --> 00:50:07,560
Speaker 2: but said, the weird loser vibes are endearing. You've grown

1140
00:50:07,640 --> 00:50:09,359
Speaker 2: on me. I don't know how to take that.

1141
00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 3: I love being a weird loser.

1142
00:50:11,160 --> 00:50:13,919
Speaker 1: Bring your comments in, roast me any which way you want,

1143
00:50:13,920 --> 00:50:17,480
Speaker 1: weird losers, everything's on the table. But Sam, there is

1144
00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 1: an update to the story. Oh really, yes, edit? I

1145
00:50:20,080 --> 00:50:22,400
Speaker 1: should mention a few things. I can't move out, I

1146
00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:24,920
Speaker 1: am disabled, and I can't live alone. My dog is

1147
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:28,399
Speaker 1: male and is a Chuawah Corki mix that's a cute mix.

1148
00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 1: Their dog is female and has about five different breeds

1149
00:50:31,960 --> 00:50:34,719
Speaker 1: in her, but is extremely small. I could not afford

1150
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:38,960
Speaker 1: a personally trained service dog, but my dog is a

1151
00:50:39,000 --> 00:50:42,000
Speaker 1: certified service dog. My mom says, it's not how often

1152
00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:44,520
Speaker 1: my dog barks, but instead how loud he barks. I

1153
00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:47,319
Speaker 1: would appreciate it if everyone can stop harassing me over

1154
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:49,840
Speaker 1: my service dog and demanding to know why I have

1155
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:52,680
Speaker 1: him and what he does. Since this is the Internet,

1156
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:55,399
Speaker 1: I legally don't have to tell anyone any information. Please

1157
00:50:55,520 --> 00:50:57,040
Speaker 1: you keep your comments about the topic of the post

1158
00:50:57,120 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 1: and nothing else.

1159
00:50:57,719 --> 00:50:58,040
Speaker 3: Thank you.

1160
00:50:58,680 --> 00:51:01,080
Speaker 1: Screw all of you guys who made all of those

1161
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:01,840
Speaker 1: stupid comments.

1162
00:51:01,920 --> 00:51:05,759
Speaker 2: Yes, stop it, leave Op alone. Yeah, we're the only

1163
00:51:05,840 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 2: ones allowed to bully Op.

1164
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:09,960
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, now we're not gonna bully you, So Sam,

1165
00:51:10,120 --> 00:51:13,760
Speaker 1: I'm curious, first, you sexy people out there. In addition

1166
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:15,440
Speaker 1: to your hate comments on me, I would love to

1167
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:18,240
Speaker 1: know your comments on this story. Do you think Ope

1168
00:51:18,440 --> 00:51:23,360
Speaker 1: was that for trying to prevent extra training from her mom?

1169
00:51:23,560 --> 00:51:26,520
Speaker 2: No, I mean it's like it's a little hard because

1170
00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:30,040
Speaker 2: it's not. It's not like Ope's living in their parents space. Yeah,

1171
00:51:30,080 --> 00:51:33,319
Speaker 2: so that's what there's a complicating factor. But I just

1172
00:51:33,400 --> 00:51:35,840
Speaker 2: think I mean, like, I personally would never use a

1173
00:51:35,880 --> 00:51:39,960
Speaker 2: shot collar on a dog. It seems cruel, But I

1174
00:51:40,000 --> 00:51:43,480
Speaker 2: do think it's ope's responsibility to ensure that the dog

1175
00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:45,759
Speaker 2: is well behaved. I would love to know from you guys, like,

1176
00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:48,920
Speaker 2: do you think putting a shot collar on your dog

1177
00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:51,880
Speaker 2: is cruel or not cruel?

1178
00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:54,480
Speaker 1: My husband thinks I'm ugly, So now he wants an

1179
00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:56,879
Speaker 1: open marriage, and I told him about the first guy

1180
00:51:56,920 --> 00:52:00,000
Speaker 1: I want to see. He doesn't want an open marriage anymore.

1181
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:02,960
Speaker 3: When I said open marriage, I meant for me, la

1182
00:52:03,560 --> 00:52:04,000
Speaker 3: for you.

1183
00:52:04,600 --> 00:52:07,760
Speaker 1: About one year ago, my husband, male forty eight told

1184
00:52:07,800 --> 00:52:11,799
Speaker 1: me female thirty nine that he was not sexually attracted

1185
00:52:11,840 --> 00:52:13,240
Speaker 1: to me anymore.

1186
00:52:13,680 --> 00:52:15,120
Speaker 3: I kind of understand that.

1187
00:52:15,320 --> 00:52:20,320
Speaker 2: Oh, op, no, you're beautiful on the inside.

1188
00:52:20,680 --> 00:52:24,800
Speaker 1: That's because since our second child, Male four, was born,

1189
00:52:25,080 --> 00:52:27,520
Speaker 1: he hasn't made love to me. He said he loved

1190
00:52:27,560 --> 00:52:29,680
Speaker 1: me more than anything in the world, and that the

1191
00:52:29,719 --> 00:52:32,960
Speaker 1: rest of the relationship was perfect, but he needed to

1192
00:52:33,280 --> 00:52:36,440
Speaker 1: do thirty deed or he would go crazy. I was

1193
00:52:36,480 --> 00:52:39,719
Speaker 1: taken aback, but I started asking him about the definition

1194
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:42,400
Speaker 1: of an open marriage and We discussed it over a

1195
00:52:42,440 --> 00:52:45,799
Speaker 1: few weeks. To be honest, I was feeling very sexually

1196
00:52:45,880 --> 00:52:48,920
Speaker 1: deprived and the idea started to grow on me. I

1197
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:52,040
Speaker 1: said yes and asked if there were any rules, and

1198
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 1: he said that usually every couple had their own rules.

1199
00:52:55,719 --> 00:52:59,399
Speaker 1: I beg whoever I want and you don't, so our

1200
00:52:59,560 --> 00:53:03,640
Speaker 1: rules are no bringing them home, and use protection. My

1201
00:53:03,719 --> 00:53:06,080
Speaker 1: husband was very clear that he also wanted to know

1202
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:09,960
Speaker 1: who the other person slash persons were and when.

1203
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:11,280
Speaker 2: It happened, that's okay.

1204
00:53:11,440 --> 00:53:12,200
Speaker 3: Three rules.

1205
00:53:12,280 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 1: The when he said was to plan our days. He

1206
00:53:15,239 --> 00:53:18,400
Speaker 1: was meeting some new women. Within a week, he told

1207
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:21,880
Speaker 1: me everything, showed me pictures, and was gone most of

1208
00:53:21,920 --> 00:53:22,560
Speaker 1: the nights.

1209
00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:26,200
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna lie. I feel like crap, but I thought.

1210
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:29,120
Speaker 3: I needed to give it time. I mean, I get

1211
00:53:29,160 --> 00:53:29,720
Speaker 3: it now.

1212
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:32,839
Speaker 1: I was more careful, however, because I needed to know

1213
00:53:32,880 --> 00:53:35,040
Speaker 1: the people that I was hooking up with at least

1214
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 1: to have some kind of feelings. But I started to

1215
00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:40,680
Speaker 1: relax more and flirt back with some guys. One of

1216
00:53:40,719 --> 00:53:43,799
Speaker 1: them is a client, Jay Mail, thirty six, at the

1217
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:46,200
Speaker 1: bank I work for. Not my client, but he sees

1218
00:53:46,239 --> 00:53:49,120
Speaker 1: me oftened and he was always pleasant and extra chatty

1219
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 1: with me. So now, I've started flirting about a month ago,

1220
00:53:52,200 --> 00:53:55,120
Speaker 1: and I finally decided I was ready to start.

1221
00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:57,600
Speaker 3: Sleeping with others. Okay, oh yeah.

1222
00:53:57,680 --> 00:54:00,879
Speaker 1: I told Jay about my arrangement. He was disappointed.

1223
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:04,319
Speaker 3: Why huh, how funny? First guy for a month?

1224
00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:06,760
Speaker 2: He was after a week day.

1225
00:54:06,920 --> 00:54:09,319
Speaker 1: He was disappointed at first, but then he said he

1226
00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:11,600
Speaker 1: was in I went home to my husband and asked

1227
00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:13,680
Speaker 1: him if he was going to do anything Friday, and

1228
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:16,240
Speaker 1: he said no. I told him that was good because

1229
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:18,840
Speaker 1: I needed him to be with the children. I showed

1230
00:54:18,880 --> 00:54:20,799
Speaker 1: him Jay and I told him that I was meeting

1231
00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:23,880
Speaker 1: him on Friday. He went silent. Friday came and my

1232
00:54:23,960 --> 00:54:25,879
Speaker 1: husband texted me that he was stuck at work.

1233
00:54:26,120 --> 00:54:31,440
Speaker 3: Wow, hmmm, stuck at work, ye, take care of the kids.

1234
00:54:31,480 --> 00:54:35,120
Speaker 1: Interesting, and that he later was going to meet a

1235
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:38,400
Speaker 1: girl so he couldn't watch a children. This continued every

1236
00:54:38,440 --> 00:54:40,520
Speaker 1: time I fixed a date with Jay, he would do

1237
00:54:40,719 --> 00:54:44,680
Speaker 1: the same and leave me with the children. I don't

1238
00:54:44,680 --> 00:54:47,200
Speaker 1: mind spending more time with my children, but I was

1239
00:54:47,239 --> 00:54:48,040
Speaker 1: getting annoyed.

1240
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:51,000
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, yeah, he's not letting you get those

1241
00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:51,520
Speaker 2: rocks off.

1242
00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 1: Come on, now, last Monday, I had no meetings at

1243
00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,520
Speaker 1: work after lunch which often means that I don't need

1244
00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,840
Speaker 1: to stay in place. I texted Jay if he wanted

1245
00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:02,279
Speaker 1: to meet, and he was at home. My children were

1246
00:55:02,320 --> 00:55:07,319
Speaker 1: in daycare. I went to his place and it was amazing.

1247
00:55:07,840 --> 00:55:12,280
Speaker 1: I've missed this so so much. Feeling that I'm desired

1248
00:55:12,520 --> 00:55:15,920
Speaker 1: and that someone's eyes on me, filled with lust for

1249
00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:18,080
Speaker 1: me and my body.

1250
00:55:18,239 --> 00:55:19,560
Speaker 2: Oh, pretty sweet.

1251
00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:20,040
Speaker 3: Good gravy.

1252
00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:22,680
Speaker 1: When I got home, I saw my husband and told him,

1253
00:55:22,760 --> 00:55:26,719
Speaker 1: and he was livid because I didn't tell him beforehand.

1254
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:28,360
Speaker 3: I broke a rule.

1255
00:55:28,520 --> 00:55:30,640
Speaker 1: I told him that I didn't he knew that I

1256
00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:33,319
Speaker 1: was seeing this guy and that we've been trying to

1257
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: make time anyway. He didn't speak to me for the

1258
00:55:36,120 --> 00:55:38,680
Speaker 1: rest of the evening. He woke me up in the

1259
00:55:38,719 --> 00:55:42,200
Speaker 1: middle of the night with gentle kisses and touches and

1260
00:55:42,360 --> 00:55:46,000
Speaker 1: we did it three times, the first time in almost

1261
00:55:46,040 --> 00:55:46,880
Speaker 1: five years.

1262
00:55:47,360 --> 00:55:50,680
Speaker 2: Interesting. I think he has a case of like Now

1263
00:55:50,719 --> 00:55:54,200
Speaker 2: that he sees that she's desirable by other men, he's

1264
00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:55,760
Speaker 2: now attracted her again.

1265
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:58,120
Speaker 3: And we've done it every single night since.

1266
00:55:58,480 --> 00:56:01,080
Speaker 1: Now he's saying that he's a to me again and

1267
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:03,560
Speaker 1: that's why we need to close up the marriage. But

1268
00:56:03,600 --> 00:56:06,359
Speaker 1: I don't want to. I like having other options and

1269
00:56:06,480 --> 00:56:10,320
Speaker 1: we're not hurting anyone. Okay, there is uh a juice juice,

1270
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:11,240
Speaker 1: pretty beefy.

1271
00:56:11,480 --> 00:56:13,480
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we got yeah, we got, we got some

1272
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:14,960
Speaker 2: to go, but we got them to go.

1273
00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 3: Quick.

1274
00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:19,800
Speaker 1: Thoughts everyone right now, Sam, Do you think op's the

1275
00:56:19,800 --> 00:56:20,880
Speaker 1: a hole at this instance?

1276
00:56:21,120 --> 00:56:24,040
Speaker 2: No, not at all, not at all, zero percent, the

1277
00:56:24,080 --> 00:56:28,240
Speaker 2: a whole. Husband prompted this. Yeah, and now like suddenly

1278
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:30,840
Speaker 2: has changed his mind wants to close it up. My

1279
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:34,840
Speaker 2: feeling is there's a good chance that the flip flops again. Yeah,

1280
00:56:34,840 --> 00:56:36,799
Speaker 2: which what I think that would be so bad? That's

1281
00:56:36,840 --> 00:56:37,400
Speaker 2: a good prediction.

1282
00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:40,759
Speaker 1: When I found Jay, however, my husband was suddenly attracted

1283
00:56:40,800 --> 00:56:41,000
Speaker 1: to me.

1284
00:56:41,120 --> 00:56:42,320
Speaker 3: We've been doing it regularly.

1285
00:56:42,480 --> 00:56:44,799
Speaker 1: I loved it because I love my husband and it's

1286
00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:47,479
Speaker 1: just a wonderful feeling to be desired by him again,

1287
00:56:47,560 --> 00:56:50,040
Speaker 1: even though deep down I knew he wasn't attracted me

1288
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:53,120
Speaker 1: as much as he was panicking that I'm starting.

1289
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:57,319
Speaker 3: To sleep with others. Ah. Interesting, it's a panic with

1290
00:56:57,480 --> 00:56:59,480
Speaker 3: the worst cad, the worst kind of.

1291
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:03,319
Speaker 1: And I was right. Last Tuesday I was supposed to

1292
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:06,080
Speaker 1: meet with Jay again. So Monday evening, as per our agreement,

1293
00:57:06,160 --> 00:57:08,320
Speaker 1: I told my husband about it. He was so surprised.

1294
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:10,720
Speaker 2: Why do you even want to meet him when I've

1295
00:57:10,840 --> 00:57:13,759
Speaker 2: done it to your sweet vagine every night for the

1296
00:57:13,800 --> 00:57:14,560
Speaker 2: past week.

1297
00:57:14,680 --> 00:57:16,000
Speaker 3: Babe? Is that actually what?

1298
00:57:16,320 --> 00:57:19,200
Speaker 1: No? I just looked at him and told him that

1299
00:57:19,320 --> 00:57:22,400
Speaker 1: I didn't understand what he meant. We had an open marriage,

1300
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:24,400
Speaker 1: and I've been very clear that I don't want to

1301
00:57:24,440 --> 00:57:26,640
Speaker 1: close it again. I feel very happy and content for

1302
00:57:26,680 --> 00:57:29,240
Speaker 1: the first time in years, and he has been sleeping

1303
00:57:29,280 --> 00:57:32,360
Speaker 1: with others for a year without any problems.

1304
00:57:32,640 --> 00:57:35,080
Speaker 2: God, yeah, hypocrisy is the issue.

1305
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:36,120
Speaker 3: Well why now?

1306
00:57:36,280 --> 00:57:38,920
Speaker 1: Well he told me that he hadn't been with anyone

1307
00:57:38,960 --> 00:57:40,200
Speaker 1: in almost two weeks.

1308
00:57:40,440 --> 00:57:49,560
Speaker 2: Oh wow, standing, oh man, in two weeks?

1309
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:50,520
Speaker 3: What is he gonna do?

1310
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:54,800
Speaker 1: Because he thought that I quote was enough, so he

1311
00:57:54,840 --> 00:57:58,360
Speaker 1: didn't understand why he wasn't enough for me. I asked

1312
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:00,520
Speaker 1: him why the sudden interested me and my body? He

1313
00:58:00,560 --> 00:58:03,520
Speaker 1: has never been so interested before, and never so passionate

1314
00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:06,360
Speaker 1: and attentive, not even when I was ten years younger

1315
00:58:06,360 --> 00:58:08,800
Speaker 1: and more beautiful. He said he always found me beautiful

1316
00:58:08,840 --> 00:58:11,320
Speaker 1: and he didn't know why he's more attracted now. I

1317
00:58:11,480 --> 00:58:14,720
Speaker 1: told him I knew why, because suddenly you couldn't picture

1318
00:58:14,760 --> 00:58:17,560
Speaker 1: someone else with your wife, and suddenly I was more

1319
00:58:17,640 --> 00:58:20,440
Speaker 1: than a wife or a mother. In your eyes, I

1320
00:58:20,600 --> 00:58:22,920
Speaker 1: was a sexual being. He tried to deny it, but

1321
00:58:23,000 --> 00:58:26,000
Speaker 1: I didn't budge. I told him that he wasn't seeing

1322
00:58:26,040 --> 00:58:28,520
Speaker 1: other women because he's too busy trying to keep me

1323
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:31,000
Speaker 1: at bay. The moment I was under his control again,

1324
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,640
Speaker 1: he would lose interest and start seeing other women, hopefully

1325
00:58:33,640 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 1: when I'm pregnant, because in your mind, I would be

1326
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:38,240
Speaker 1: less appealing to men. He was so angry about this,

1327
00:58:38,320 --> 00:58:40,160
Speaker 1: and he told me it was all in my head.

1328
00:58:40,240 --> 00:58:44,320
Speaker 1: He threw the dinner plate across the room and left

1329
00:58:44,640 --> 00:58:47,560
Speaker 1: Yoh that is not acceptable.

1330
00:58:47,720 --> 00:58:49,760
Speaker 2: No, yeah, he's losing it. He's losing it.

1331
00:58:49,800 --> 00:58:51,200
Speaker 3: He spent the night outside.

1332
00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:53,920
Speaker 1: Next day he was calmer, and I told him that

1333
00:58:54,000 --> 00:58:56,000
Speaker 1: I didn't want to close our marriage. I loved him

1334
00:58:56,120 --> 00:58:59,200
Speaker 1: very much, but I was miserable without making love. I

1335
00:58:59,240 --> 00:59:01,760
Speaker 1: believed it in my heart that we, the both of us,

1336
00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:04,120
Speaker 1: could have the cake and eat it too. We could

1337
00:59:04,160 --> 00:59:07,640
Speaker 1: have our beautiful life with our children, our careers, families, friends,

1338
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:10,400
Speaker 1: our hobbies, trips and dinner dates, everything that we loved

1339
00:59:10,440 --> 00:59:13,480
Speaker 1: and cherished about each other, and active sex lives with

1340
00:59:13,680 --> 00:59:16,640
Speaker 1: like minded people. I told him that he didn't seem

1341
00:59:16,680 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 1: to be as cool with my picks as I was

1342
00:59:19,560 --> 00:59:22,600
Speaker 1: all these months with all the women he showed me.

1343
00:59:22,840 --> 00:59:24,800
Speaker 1: Maybe I could be more discreet so the men I

1344
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:27,760
Speaker 1: met stayed faithless in his mind, maybe it was easier

1345
00:59:28,000 --> 00:59:29,800
Speaker 1: he didn't answer me, or we.

1346
00:59:29,760 --> 00:59:31,560
Speaker 3: Could go our separate ways to this.

1347
00:59:31,800 --> 00:59:34,520
Speaker 1: He was starting to get agitated again, so I asked

1348
00:59:34,600 --> 00:59:37,320
Speaker 1: him to calm down and listen. He couldn't just demolish

1349
00:59:37,320 --> 00:59:39,920
Speaker 1: the kitchen and walk away every time I said something

1350
00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:41,200
Speaker 1: that wasn't to his taste.

1351
00:59:41,560 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 2: Correct.

1352
00:59:42,200 --> 00:59:44,560
Speaker 1: I couldn't and wouldn't go back to how things were

1353
00:59:44,600 --> 00:59:47,720
Speaker 1: before opening our marriage. So either he wanted this or

1354
00:59:47,800 --> 00:59:51,120
Speaker 1: we'd get a divorce. I asked him to think about it. Thursday,

1355
00:59:51,200 --> 00:59:53,320
Speaker 1: when he got back from work, I had already changed

1356
00:59:53,360 --> 00:59:55,320
Speaker 1: and was ready to go out. He didn't say anything.

1357
00:59:55,360 --> 00:59:57,680
Speaker 1: When I got home, he was crying and said that

1358
00:59:57,760 --> 01:00:00,080
Speaker 1: he couldn't do this anymore. I told him that, but

1359
01:00:00,120 --> 01:00:03,120
Speaker 1: we can only have one solution then, and it was divorce.

1360
01:00:03,360 --> 01:00:05,120
Speaker 3: He said that I was brutal.

1361
01:00:05,280 --> 01:00:08,640
Speaker 1: Quote, You're not the beautiful kind woman I married anymore.

1362
01:00:08,880 --> 01:00:15,160
Speaker 1: A buddy, buddy, buddy, this guy is too much. He

1363
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:18,120
Speaker 1: hasn't been home this weekend. He called every night just

1364
01:00:18,160 --> 01:00:20,320
Speaker 1: to say good night to the children. He texted me

1365
01:00:20,400 --> 01:00:22,000
Speaker 1: once Are you in love with Jay?

1366
01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:22,480
Speaker 2: No?

1367
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:24,720
Speaker 1: Is he better than me? Are you going to start

1368
01:00:24,800 --> 01:00:28,240
Speaker 1: dating him if we divorce? I didn't answer.

1369
01:00:28,560 --> 01:00:34,240
Speaker 3: Damn, bro, you're asking the dude. Jay has called me

1370
01:00:34,480 --> 01:00:36,320
Speaker 3: to tell me that it's all over.

1371
01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:37,720
Speaker 2: I wonder why that happened.

1372
01:00:37,920 --> 01:00:41,320
Speaker 1: Funny you ask Tom Foolery. Fucking the husband did something.

1373
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:45,680
Speaker 1: My husband asked to meet him yesterday. He denied that

1374
01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:49,360
Speaker 1: we had an open marriage and told Jay he needed

1375
01:00:49,400 --> 01:00:50,840
Speaker 1: to back off.

1376
01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:54,440
Speaker 2: Wow bro, bro, Wow.

1377
01:00:54,880 --> 01:00:58,120
Speaker 1: He showed him the texts where I said that Jay

1378
01:00:58,600 --> 01:01:01,959
Speaker 1: wasn't better in bed and that I wasn't in love

1379
01:01:02,000 --> 01:01:02,400
Speaker 1: with him.

1380
01:01:02,600 --> 01:01:05,680
Speaker 2: So Jay was very hurt, believing that I lied to him.

1381
01:01:05,720 --> 01:01:09,120
Speaker 2: This sneaky scoundrel. He used the.

1382
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:13,320
Speaker 1: Texts, That's why he asked those questions. I tried to

1383
01:01:13,400 --> 01:01:16,160
Speaker 1: explain everything to Jay, but he didn't believe me. I

1384
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:19,280
Speaker 1: sent him a screenshot with my husband arranging his hookups

1385
01:01:19,520 --> 01:01:21,840
Speaker 1: and a screenshot with me telling my husband that I

1386
01:01:21,920 --> 01:01:24,600
Speaker 1: was meeting Jay. I think he believed me after that.

1387
01:01:24,840 --> 01:01:27,400
Speaker 1: He said he wanted to end it anyways. He has

1388
01:01:27,480 --> 01:01:30,520
Speaker 1: feelings for me, but this arrangement won't work for him anymore.

1389
01:01:30,600 --> 01:01:33,480
Speaker 1: I told him that I totally understand and I apologize

1390
01:01:33,480 --> 01:01:35,920
Speaker 1: for my and my husband's actions. I'm not mad, but

1391
01:01:35,960 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 1: I'm sad that I've lost him. It takes a lot

1392
01:01:38,200 --> 01:01:40,520
Speaker 1: for me to like and trust someone, but I understand

1393
01:01:40,600 --> 01:01:42,560
Speaker 1: that he doesn't want to deal with this drama. I'm

1394
01:01:42,560 --> 01:01:44,960
Speaker 1: going to miss him though. My husband came home today

1395
01:01:45,120 --> 01:01:48,080
Speaker 1: all smiles, and he said that we should give our.

1396
01:01:48,080 --> 01:01:50,120
Speaker 2: Open marriage another shot.

1397
01:01:50,760 --> 01:01:54,120
Speaker 3: What an actual what act tole.

1398
01:01:54,400 --> 01:01:57,800
Speaker 1: Seeing how the children were happy seeing him after disappearing

1399
01:01:57,800 --> 01:02:00,640
Speaker 1: for the whole weekend broke my heart. I've been so

1400
01:02:00,680 --> 01:02:04,120
Speaker 1: self involved forgetting that my babies are the most important thing.

1401
01:02:04,240 --> 01:02:07,440
Speaker 1: Right now, I won't forget that now.

1402
01:02:09,080 --> 01:02:13,080
Speaker 3: Wow, I don't know if I like where this story ended.

1403
01:02:13,240 --> 01:02:16,720
Speaker 2: No, it's like like it feels like this feels like

1404
01:02:16,760 --> 01:02:18,840
Speaker 2: this dude is just getting like a free pass. Yeah,

1405
01:02:18,960 --> 01:02:20,520
Speaker 2: I feel like a villain one.

1406
01:02:20,800 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 1: Literally the most free passed, Like like he's done all

1407
01:02:23,840 --> 01:02:27,880
Speaker 1: of this tomfoolery and he I mean, the way that

1408
01:02:28,040 --> 01:02:31,800
Speaker 1: ending leads me to believe is that they stay together.

1409
01:02:32,160 --> 01:02:34,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, they have a happily ever after, But dude, you're

1410
01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:36,320
Speaker 2: marrying the wrong guy.

1411
01:02:36,480 --> 01:02:41,840
Speaker 1: Dude, he is He's a maniac. He is like on

1412
01:02:41,920 --> 01:02:46,040
Speaker 1: a different planet. Yeah fuck well, okay, all right, well

1413
01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:48,600
Speaker 1: the question stands, ladies and gentlemen, for all of you

1414
01:02:48,760 --> 01:02:51,680
Speaker 1: with your wonderful fingers, let us know, was Op the

1415
01:02:51,720 --> 01:02:53,920
Speaker 1: a hole? I kind of want to know what's the

1416
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:55,400
Speaker 1: real question here? What's the real question here?

1417
01:02:55,680 --> 01:02:59,800
Speaker 2: My question is is the husband the a hole for

1418
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:03,240
Speaker 2: or wanting to close the marriage again? Like if you?

1419
01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:06,480
Speaker 2: I think the question I have is, let's say there's

1420
01:03:06,520 --> 01:03:10,080
Speaker 2: no red flags if you say, hey, I'm not really

1421
01:03:10,080 --> 01:03:12,680
Speaker 2: attracted to you, but I think it's because like I don't,

1422
01:03:12,920 --> 01:03:14,560
Speaker 2: I don't, I don't know. I haven't seen you as

1423
01:03:14,560 --> 01:03:17,720
Speaker 2: an object of This is really honest. I have seen

1424
01:03:17,760 --> 01:03:19,680
Speaker 2: you as an object of desire in a long time,

1425
01:03:19,720 --> 01:03:21,760
Speaker 2: and I think opening the marriage would allow me to

1426
01:03:21,800 --> 01:03:25,400
Speaker 2: see you, like as attractive in the eyes of other men,

1427
01:03:25,440 --> 01:03:27,520
Speaker 2: and this I might be attracted to you. Could we

1428
01:03:27,680 --> 01:03:31,080
Speaker 2: open the marriage to see if we can kickstart our

1429
01:03:31,120 --> 01:03:34,120
Speaker 2: own sexual interest in each other again and then close

1430
01:03:34,160 --> 01:03:37,120
Speaker 2: it once that sexual interest is ignited? Is that you

1431
01:03:37,160 --> 01:03:40,360
Speaker 2: think a non act whole thing to do. And then also,

1432
01:03:40,520 --> 01:03:43,360
Speaker 2: like at the certain levels that Op took, what was

1433
01:03:43,400 --> 01:03:47,120
Speaker 2: the first action that he took that was an actable behavior.

1434
01:03:47,480 --> 01:03:51,320
Speaker 2: Was it asking for the open marriage? Was it saying, hey,

1435
01:03:51,440 --> 01:03:54,040
Speaker 2: like you can't see this guy. I would really love

1436
01:03:54,120 --> 01:03:57,480
Speaker 2: to know what where you think the act wholeness came

1437
01:03:57,520 --> 01:04:00,800
Speaker 2: from on either side? And then also, have you ever

1438
01:04:00,960 --> 01:04:04,360
Speaker 2: had an open marriage and closed it open? For anyone

1439
01:04:04,360 --> 01:04:07,520
Speaker 2: who has had an open marriage that it was either

1440
01:04:07,560 --> 01:04:10,400
Speaker 2: successful or unsuccessful? What did it look like when it

1441
01:04:10,440 --> 01:04:13,240
Speaker 2: started and you did you close it at any point?

1442
01:04:13,280 --> 01:04:15,680
Speaker 2: Did it cause the marriage to fall apart? I would

1443
01:04:15,720 --> 01:04:17,400
Speaker 2: love to hear those stories very much.

1444
01:04:17,400 --> 01:04:19,200
Speaker 1: So, Yeah, but I mean might even if we get

1445
01:04:19,200 --> 01:04:20,960
Speaker 1: some great ones, might even bring it on the show.

1446
01:04:21,760 --> 01:04:23,960
Speaker 1: That's a very interesting story. But yeah, I mean, uh,

1447
01:04:24,240 --> 01:04:24,919
Speaker 1: what would you say?

1448
01:04:24,960 --> 01:04:25,320
Speaker 2: What? What?

1449
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:25,680
Speaker 3: Where?

1450
01:04:25,680 --> 01:04:28,360
Speaker 1: Do you think was the first time it was like

1451
01:04:28,440 --> 01:04:29,400
Speaker 1: went over the line to al?

1452
01:04:29,560 --> 01:04:33,000
Speaker 2: I mean for the husband. I think the first time

1453
01:04:33,440 --> 01:04:36,480
Speaker 2: was when Hugh was cock blocking the wife. Yeah, that

1454
01:04:36,560 --> 01:04:38,720
Speaker 2: felt like it's like, hey, you're being a hypocrite here,

1455
01:04:38,840 --> 01:04:40,880
Speaker 2: Like it's one thing to ask for an open marriage

1456
01:04:40,960 --> 01:04:43,960
Speaker 2: and start to test that out, but to not allow

1457
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:46,160
Speaker 2: the wife to play by the same rules you're playing

1458
01:04:46,160 --> 01:04:49,760
Speaker 2: by seems really hypocritical and really insecure. Yeah, and then

1459
01:04:49,800 --> 01:04:51,440
Speaker 2: I think he just got progressively more.

1460
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:56,480
Speaker 1: Yea, throughout the story exactly. He just just amplified it's snowballed. Yeah,

1461
01:04:56,520 --> 01:04:58,600
Speaker 1: I think my wife is about to be fired. I

1462
01:04:58,680 --> 01:05:01,800
Speaker 1: ruined the dinner with her boss in the worst way imaginable.

1463
01:05:01,840 --> 01:05:03,720
Speaker 1: Should I find a divorce lawyer.

1464
01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:06,880
Speaker 2: Get a divorce as early as possible, Yeah, yea, be proactive.

1465
01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:09,080
Speaker 3: That's what we always share losses.

1466
01:05:09,160 --> 01:05:11,840
Speaker 1: So last night, my wife's boss from her brand new

1467
01:05:11,920 --> 01:05:14,320
Speaker 1: job invited us over for dinner. On the drive over,

1468
01:05:14,520 --> 01:05:17,880
Speaker 1: my wife reiterated many times to me just how important

1469
01:05:17,920 --> 01:05:20,360
Speaker 1: it was to make a good impression. I scoffed and

1470
01:05:20,600 --> 01:05:24,800
Speaker 1: arrogantly informed my silly wife that I always make good impressions.

1471
01:05:24,920 --> 01:05:26,320
Speaker 3: That's how you know he's going to crush it.

1472
01:05:26,640 --> 01:05:31,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's being super pompous and egotistical exactly.

1473
01:05:31,320 --> 01:05:33,760
Speaker 1: My wife's boss is a single lady in her fifties,

1474
01:05:33,880 --> 01:05:35,520
Speaker 1: so it was just the three of us. We chit

1475
01:05:35,600 --> 01:05:38,720
Speaker 1: chatted over drainings and salads and seemed to be really

1476
01:05:38,800 --> 01:05:41,480
Speaker 1: hitting it off. She laughed at my well timed and

1477
01:05:41,680 --> 01:05:44,960
Speaker 1: perfectly appropriate jokes, and my wife seemed pleased.

1478
01:05:45,320 --> 01:05:46,640
Speaker 3: But then we hooked up.

1479
01:05:46,720 --> 01:05:50,880
Speaker 1: Now soon she brought out the main course, a nice, big,

1480
01:05:51,040 --> 01:05:54,320
Speaker 1: juicy steak for each of us. As I began to

1481
01:05:54,360 --> 01:05:57,640
Speaker 1: cut into my steak, I was discouraged to discover how

1482
01:05:57,760 --> 01:05:59,320
Speaker 1: undercooked the steak was.

1483
01:05:59,640 --> 01:06:00,560
Speaker 3: Now, I've had.

1484
01:06:00,440 --> 01:06:03,200
Speaker 1: My fair share of rare steak. I prefer medium, but

1485
01:06:03,240 --> 01:06:06,320
Speaker 1: I can handle rare. This was several minutes on a

1486
01:06:06,400 --> 01:06:10,760
Speaker 1: hot grill. Short of rare, I probably could have resuscitated

1487
01:06:10,800 --> 01:06:13,800
Speaker 1: the cow had I tried. I sat there fidgeting with

1488
01:06:13,840 --> 01:06:16,040
Speaker 1: my knife and fork, worrying about how I was going

1489
01:06:16,120 --> 01:06:18,040
Speaker 1: to get away with not eating the steak.

1490
01:06:18,160 --> 01:06:19,160
Speaker 3: Claim veganism.

1491
01:06:19,360 --> 01:06:23,000
Speaker 1: No, I'd already feigned great enthusiasm upon seeing the steak,

1492
01:06:23,040 --> 01:06:25,920
Speaker 1: But just then our hostess excused herself to the kitchen

1493
01:06:26,040 --> 01:06:28,680
Speaker 1: to take care of some dessert preparations. As I looked

1494
01:06:28,680 --> 01:06:32,040
Speaker 1: across the fancy dining room table of this three story apartment,

1495
01:06:32,120 --> 01:06:35,280
Speaker 1: a cartoon light bulb appeared over my head.

1496
01:06:35,880 --> 01:06:39,200
Speaker 2: Ate the steak and don't cause any problems, right.

1497
01:06:39,120 --> 01:06:43,520
Speaker 1: No, the opposite. I knew I had to be decisive.

1498
01:06:43,720 --> 01:06:46,640
Speaker 1: Realizing that she could return at any moment, I committed.

1499
01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:49,560
Speaker 1: I grabbed the steak with my hand. I gently shook

1500
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:53,320
Speaker 1: off the juice and executed a perfect throw through the

1501
01:06:53,360 --> 01:06:54,160
Speaker 1: center of.

1502
01:06:54,160 --> 01:06:59,560
Speaker 2: The open window. What the fuck? Nothing could go wrong.

1503
01:07:00,200 --> 01:07:00,480
Speaker 3: One.

1504
01:07:00,720 --> 01:07:04,320
Speaker 2: I am impressed best be a quarterback of the high

1505
01:07:04,360 --> 01:07:05,360
Speaker 2: school football.

1506
01:07:05,040 --> 01:07:07,640
Speaker 3: Literally, because goddamn that takes some aim.

1507
01:07:07,840 --> 01:07:10,840
Speaker 2: But what the fuck are you thinking throwing a raw, juicy,

1508
01:07:11,200 --> 01:07:14,160
Speaker 2: bloody steak through this nice lady's apartment.

1509
01:07:14,480 --> 01:07:19,919
Speaker 1: It gets worse. Oh, how, here's the big time f up.

1510
01:07:20,160 --> 01:07:22,160
Speaker 1: The window wasn't open.

1511
01:07:29,360 --> 01:07:31,280
Speaker 3: This guy is so dumb.

1512
01:07:31,600 --> 01:07:34,240
Speaker 1: It was the cleanest freaking window you've ever seen in

1513
01:07:34,280 --> 01:07:37,640
Speaker 1: your life. That is until my mostly raw slab of

1514
01:07:37,680 --> 01:07:41,480
Speaker 1: meat slammed against it and slowly slid down, leaving a

1515
01:07:41,520 --> 01:07:49,840
Speaker 1: trail of bloody juice in its wakes. Think well, it's funny,

1516
01:07:49,880 --> 01:07:53,120
Speaker 1: you might ask, could you imagine you just eating your steak?

1517
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:56,400
Speaker 1: Or just like boo, giant steak just hit the fucking window.

1518
01:07:56,720 --> 01:08:00,400
Speaker 1: So my wife, whose steak was a nice medium and

1519
01:08:00,520 --> 01:08:05,160
Speaker 1: was unaware of my predicament, turned jaw dropped and stared

1520
01:08:05,200 --> 01:08:08,720
Speaker 1: at me like I was an alien from another planet, as.

1521
01:08:08,640 --> 01:08:12,960
Speaker 2: She should to be fair, What are you doing throwing

1522
01:08:13,040 --> 01:08:15,400
Speaker 2: your food like a fucking toddler?

1523
01:08:15,880 --> 01:08:19,000
Speaker 1: This look then slowly morphed into one of the more

1524
01:08:19,200 --> 01:08:22,080
Speaker 1: there is no place on this planet you can ever

1525
01:08:22,240 --> 01:08:25,479
Speaker 1: hide from me expression of demonic anger.

1526
01:08:25,840 --> 01:08:28,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, my wife's boss heard.

1527
01:08:28,120 --> 01:08:34,240
Speaker 1: The thud of the steak on window impact and came quickly, how.

1528
01:08:34,120 --> 01:08:36,360
Speaker 2: Do you explain this? I want to do a little

1529
01:08:36,439 --> 01:08:39,160
Speaker 2: role playing. Okay, okay, okay, you did come up with

1530
01:08:39,200 --> 01:08:43,080
Speaker 2: an excuse? Fat right, Yeah, I'm the boss. All I

1531
01:08:43,120 --> 01:08:46,439
Speaker 2: brought the cupcakes for a Is that the steak on

1532
01:08:46,560 --> 01:08:47,080
Speaker 2: the window?

1533
01:08:47,479 --> 01:08:47,719
Speaker 3: Yes?

1534
01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:53,559
Speaker 2: So you see, I have this really rare muscle spasm

1535
01:08:53,680 --> 01:08:56,800
Speaker 2: basically when I'm exposed to me and you know, I

1536
01:08:56,840 --> 01:08:58,160
Speaker 2: didn't want to make a big deal of it.

1537
01:08:58,240 --> 01:08:58,559
Speaker 3: You know, I.

1538
01:08:59,479 --> 01:09:02,599
Speaker 1: I so appreciate except your hospitality and listen, the stakes

1539
01:09:02,600 --> 01:09:03,160
Speaker 1: look amazing.

1540
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:04,120
Speaker 3: I wanted to eat it.

1541
01:09:04,200 --> 01:09:06,639
Speaker 1: So I went to eat it, trying to be polite,

1542
01:09:06,720 --> 01:09:11,160
Speaker 1: and my meat triggered muscle SPASMDS just started flaring like crazy,

1543
01:09:11,479 --> 01:09:13,640
Speaker 1: and I slapped, and you know I was, I was,

1544
01:09:13,680 --> 01:09:16,320
Speaker 1: you know, d one football player, you know, the whole thing,

1545
01:09:16,880 --> 01:09:20,759
Speaker 1: perfect spiral. I slapped the meat with the athletic precision

1546
01:09:20,960 --> 01:09:25,160
Speaker 1: of Tom Brady and it just slammed against your window,

1547
01:09:25,280 --> 01:09:29,760
Speaker 1: and my goodness, I'm so I apologize truly from the

1548
01:09:29,800 --> 01:09:30,519
Speaker 1: bottom of my heart.

1549
01:09:30,600 --> 01:09:32,000
Speaker 3: What's this condition called?

1550
01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:40,320
Speaker 1: Oh, it's called RBS, which is random performed meat syndrome.

1551
01:09:40,800 --> 01:09:43,080
Speaker 1: The boss came in. She took in the scene, the

1552
01:09:43,160 --> 01:09:47,200
Speaker 1: steak sitting on the windowsill, the blood trail, my empty plate,

1553
01:09:48,000 --> 01:09:51,120
Speaker 1: and then gave me an inquisitive, puzzled look. I just

1554
01:09:51,160 --> 01:09:53,240
Speaker 1: didn't know what to say. It felt like a minute

1555
01:09:53,280 --> 01:09:55,839
Speaker 1: of silence, but was probably three or four seconds.

1556
01:09:56,200 --> 01:10:00,439
Speaker 2: Finally, the best I could manage was, I'm sorry, I'm

1557
01:10:00,439 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 2: such a klutz.

1558
01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:01,760
Speaker 3: I don't know.

1559
01:10:01,800 --> 01:10:04,360
Speaker 1: I was just I was just cutting it and and

1560
01:10:04,479 --> 01:10:08,280
Speaker 1: it slipped it, just asked my wife. Really a klutz, right, honey,

1561
01:10:08,360 --> 01:10:09,759
Speaker 1: no help coming from this direction.

1562
01:10:10,680 --> 01:10:12,840
Speaker 2: I will clean it up. I can't believe it. I'm

1563
01:10:12,880 --> 01:10:16,040
Speaker 2: so sorry, I'm so sorry, et cetera, et cetera. Spiral

1564
01:10:16,479 --> 01:10:20,240
Speaker 2: all the way to the window. Oh, I'm such a klutz,

1565
01:10:20,600 --> 01:10:21,479
Speaker 2: reverse klutz.

1566
01:10:21,720 --> 01:10:24,160
Speaker 1: Both women continue to stared at me like I had

1567
01:10:24,320 --> 01:10:27,040
Speaker 1: escaped from the looney bin as I smeared the blood

1568
01:10:27,080 --> 01:10:30,040
Speaker 1: around the window with my cloth napkin, dusted off the steak,

1569
01:10:30,120 --> 01:10:33,840
Speaker 1: and continued to mutter my incoherent explanation. I knew no

1570
01:10:33,880 --> 01:10:36,280
Speaker 1: one was buying the story. I knew what I had

1571
01:10:36,280 --> 01:10:39,560
Speaker 1: to do. I sheepishly returned to my seat and proceeded

1572
01:10:39,560 --> 01:10:44,120
Speaker 1: to eat every bite of that disgusting, cold chewy, bloody,

1573
01:10:44,240 --> 01:10:44,799
Speaker 1: raw steak.

1574
01:10:44,920 --> 01:10:48,000
Speaker 3: I don't know that that's what you have to do.

1575
01:10:48,360 --> 01:10:52,080
Speaker 2: Yeah that I feel like Op is as smooth as

1576
01:10:52,240 --> 01:10:55,479
Speaker 2: he thinks he is. Yeah, he came off very confident.

1577
01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:59,080
Speaker 2: These are like two fairly major social fobas.

1578
01:10:59,320 --> 01:11:01,960
Speaker 1: I remained quiet the rest of the evening. My wife's

1579
01:11:02,040 --> 01:11:04,400
Speaker 1: only two words to me since the incident.

1580
01:11:04,040 --> 01:11:05,439
Speaker 2: Are I'm fine.

1581
01:11:05,680 --> 01:11:08,000
Speaker 3: Those are dangerous words to hear. My friend. There is

1582
01:11:08,040 --> 01:11:08,920
Speaker 3: a quick update.

1583
01:11:09,080 --> 01:11:11,760
Speaker 1: Just got the first post I'm fine, communication with my

1584
01:11:11,800 --> 01:11:15,040
Speaker 1: wife via text who is at work? Good news boss's name,

1585
01:11:15,080 --> 01:11:17,280
Speaker 1: And I just had a good laugh over how much

1586
01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:19,519
Speaker 1: of a idiot you are. I hope you know you

1587
01:11:19,560 --> 01:11:21,599
Speaker 1: will never live this down. Love you, moron.

1588
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:23,240
Speaker 2: Oh it's kind of a sweet.

1589
01:11:23,080 --> 01:11:24,880
Speaker 3: And glad it ended well.

1590
01:11:25,000 --> 01:11:28,160
Speaker 2: Wow. But if throwing its steak at a window isn't

1591
01:11:28,200 --> 01:11:31,280
Speaker 2: a red flag, I don't know what is.

1592
01:11:31,160 --> 01:11:34,519
Speaker 1: This man's whole demeanor in life philosophy is a red flag?

1593
01:11:34,920 --> 01:11:39,759
Speaker 2: Juicy, red, dripping flat, Yes, it really is. My question

1594
01:11:39,880 --> 01:11:42,200
Speaker 2: to the audience, is that a red flag to you?

1595
01:11:43,880 --> 01:11:48,120
Speaker 2: If your significant others reaction to an uncooked steak is

1596
01:11:48,160 --> 01:11:52,240
Speaker 2: to spiral it through a window across a room, and

1597
01:11:52,320 --> 01:11:55,760
Speaker 2: to do so unsuccessfully. Do you stay with them? Is

1598
01:11:55,800 --> 01:11:56,960
Speaker 2: this not a red flag?

1599
01:11:57,120 --> 01:11:59,200
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know, like leaving them over that,

1600
01:11:59,280 --> 01:12:01,120
Speaker 1: But it's like, I think it's a good question of

1601
01:12:01,280 --> 01:12:05,080
Speaker 1: like what what's I feel like there's more under the surface.

1602
01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:07,280
Speaker 2: I feel like there's more than meets the eye there.

1603
01:12:07,560 --> 01:12:10,599
Speaker 2: This can't be an isolated incident. Well, I would love

1604
01:12:10,640 --> 01:12:13,280
Speaker 2: to know from our audience. One is this a red flag?

1605
01:12:13,400 --> 01:12:13,639
Speaker 3: Yep?

1606
01:12:13,800 --> 01:12:16,400
Speaker 2: And two what's the worst thing that someone has done

1607
01:12:16,400 --> 01:12:17,240
Speaker 2: at a dinner party?

1608
01:12:17,320 --> 01:12:19,519
Speaker 3: Oh? Man, I would love to know those story. Man.

1609
01:12:19,680 --> 01:12:22,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, my racist girlfriend called me a slur. I want

1610
01:12:22,840 --> 01:12:24,920
Speaker 1: to break up with her. Am I the a hole?

1611
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:27,000
Speaker 2: You know how like couples of pet names.

1612
01:12:27,400 --> 01:12:29,200
Speaker 3: Take me down this path. You're about to walk me

1613
01:12:29,240 --> 01:12:32,240
Speaker 3: down and say, maybe it's just a really unique pet name.

1614
01:12:32,280 --> 01:12:35,719
Speaker 1: Wow, really a really really specific unique pet name. Really,

1615
01:12:35,800 --> 01:12:38,479
Speaker 1: before anyone thinks this is fake, let me assure you

1616
01:12:38,640 --> 01:12:39,600
Speaker 1: I wish this was.

1617
01:12:39,880 --> 01:12:40,719
Speaker 3: I am in shock.

1618
01:12:40,840 --> 01:12:43,439
Speaker 1: I twenty six male, just recently went on a date

1619
01:12:43,520 --> 01:12:46,240
Speaker 1: with a twenty five to twenty eight question mark.

1620
01:12:46,439 --> 01:12:47,439
Speaker 2: You don't know the age.

1621
01:12:47,600 --> 01:12:49,160
Speaker 3: So we met at the gym.

1622
01:12:49,240 --> 01:12:51,240
Speaker 1: I've had a crush on her for a while and

1623
01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:53,720
Speaker 1: finally struck up a convo and asked her out.

1624
01:12:53,840 --> 01:12:54,920
Speaker 3: I booked us at.

1625
01:12:54,760 --> 01:12:58,080
Speaker 1: A nice Korean restaurant that has Korean barbecue stations. So

1626
01:12:58,240 --> 01:12:59,800
Speaker 1: we sit at the bar and we have a pleasant

1627
01:12:59,840 --> 01:13:02,160
Speaker 1: chat for a few minutes, and then they tell us

1628
01:13:02,160 --> 01:13:04,040
Speaker 1: that our table is ready. We go to our table

1629
01:13:04,120 --> 01:13:06,320
Speaker 1: and it's got a huge grill with a fire on it,

1630
01:13:06,400 --> 01:13:09,280
Speaker 1: and she instantly asks what it is. How does anyone

1631
01:13:09,320 --> 01:13:10,880
Speaker 1: not know what Korean barbecue is?

1632
01:13:11,000 --> 01:13:11,160
Speaker 3: Now?

1633
01:13:11,240 --> 01:13:13,160
Speaker 1: I brush this off and I explained to her, and

1634
01:13:13,200 --> 01:13:15,120
Speaker 1: she was like, but why do we have to do

1635
01:13:15,160 --> 01:13:18,880
Speaker 1: all the work? And lowell, yes, she said that on ironically,

1636
01:13:19,040 --> 01:13:21,720
Speaker 1: isn't it their job? I explained to her, that's what's

1637
01:13:21,760 --> 01:13:24,000
Speaker 1: fun about it. But we could always order off the

1638
01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:26,599
Speaker 1: ala carte menu if she didn't want barbecue, But she.

1639
01:13:26,680 --> 01:13:29,320
Speaker 3: Just said, just make them do it for us.

1640
01:13:29,320 --> 01:13:31,519
Speaker 1: Interesting, she's not trying to play a lot, and insisted

1641
01:13:31,600 --> 01:13:34,400
Speaker 1: on calling the waitress over and asking her to put

1642
01:13:34,400 --> 01:13:36,879
Speaker 1: the meat on the grill and demanded to be served

1643
01:13:36,960 --> 01:13:38,760
Speaker 1: after I was ready, Like, okay, we all have the

1644
01:13:38,760 --> 01:13:39,719
Speaker 1: fun little joke.

1645
01:13:39,640 --> 01:13:42,760
Speaker 2: Like, oh but cook it and it's fun. Yeah, yeah,

1646
01:13:42,880 --> 01:13:45,800
Speaker 2: come on, just dive into the explore. There's red flag

1647
01:13:45,800 --> 01:13:46,960
Speaker 2: after red flag, right.

1648
01:13:46,840 --> 01:13:50,000
Speaker 1: Here the elderly Korean lady had to shuffle between busy

1649
01:13:50,040 --> 01:13:53,280
Speaker 1: tables and come and flip the meat and serve our plates.

1650
01:13:53,320 --> 01:13:54,599
Speaker 3: But wait, it gets worse.

1651
01:13:54,760 --> 01:13:57,080
Speaker 1: So at this point I'm super embarrassed and starting to

1652
01:13:57,120 --> 01:13:59,720
Speaker 1: see red flags like crazy. I'm Indian, so I'm kind

1653
01:13:59,720 --> 01:14:02,559
Speaker 1: of used to the whole servant master attitude thing because

1654
01:14:02,560 --> 01:14:04,400
Speaker 1: it's big in India. But I am not a fan

1655
01:14:04,439 --> 01:14:06,479
Speaker 1: of it, and I thought it was super weird here

1656
01:14:06,479 --> 01:14:07,080
Speaker 1: in the States.

1657
01:14:07,280 --> 01:14:09,240
Speaker 2: I would judge you if you were a fan of it.

1658
01:14:09,520 --> 01:14:12,400
Speaker 1: Yeah right, like, oh yeah, I'm like a huge fan

1659
01:14:12,479 --> 01:14:16,160
Speaker 1: of it, a huge fan of being called masta. But

1660
01:14:16,479 --> 01:14:18,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to see this date to the end, and yes,

1661
01:14:19,120 --> 01:14:23,440
Speaker 1: shamelessly enough, I was hoping for some adult time. Oh yeah,

1662
01:14:23,600 --> 01:14:26,640
Speaker 1: oh yeah, he might be doing some ass action of

1663
01:14:26,680 --> 01:14:27,160
Speaker 1: his own.

1664
01:14:27,439 --> 01:14:29,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, or taxes.

1665
01:14:29,760 --> 01:14:32,000
Speaker 1: At the end of the meal, she asks for dessert.

1666
01:14:32,080 --> 01:14:33,800
Speaker 1: I agree, and then I ask to see the menu.

1667
01:14:33,880 --> 01:14:35,840
Speaker 1: The waitress comes over and gives the menu and hands

1668
01:14:35,880 --> 01:14:37,840
Speaker 1: it to her. She then waits for her to leave

1669
01:14:38,000 --> 01:14:42,280
Speaker 1: and says, oh my god, this place is a nightmare.

1670
01:14:42,680 --> 01:14:46,439
Speaker 2: All of these useless immigrants she's white, come into the

1671
01:14:46,479 --> 01:14:49,120
Speaker 2: country and don't even work and eat up all our

1672
01:14:49,200 --> 01:14:51,719
Speaker 2: tax dollars. Are they even legal?

1673
01:14:52,360 --> 01:14:57,599
Speaker 1: They're literally working, bro, Why why say that you got

1674
01:14:57,600 --> 01:14:59,960
Speaker 1: something going on, little lady? And she said it loudly

1675
01:15:00,120 --> 01:15:02,720
Speaker 1: enough that a nearby table of brown people in their

1676
01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:05,920
Speaker 1: twenties started giving her dirty looks and whispering to each other.

1677
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:09,120
Speaker 1: She notices this and then goes same, goes for these

1678
01:15:09,280 --> 01:15:12,519
Speaker 1: insert racist word for people of Pakistan. At this point,

1679
01:15:12,600 --> 01:15:15,559
Speaker 1: my jaw dropped. I am Indian and she used this

1680
01:15:15,720 --> 01:15:18,320
Speaker 1: in front of me. My god, this woman has absolutely

1681
01:15:18,360 --> 01:15:18,840
Speaker 1: no shame.

1682
01:15:19,000 --> 01:15:21,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, she does not know her audience either. She really

1683
01:15:21,479 --> 01:15:24,360
Speaker 2: does it, like, come on, you're not at a KKKA rally.

1684
01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:26,960
Speaker 1: She saw my expression and went, oh, no, I didn't

1685
01:15:27,000 --> 01:15:31,160
Speaker 1: mean that. Latinos, they're fine. I love Mexican food. I

1686
01:15:31,240 --> 01:15:34,519
Speaker 1: swear I'm not racist. I love Mexican food. It seems

1687
01:15:34,560 --> 01:15:38,160
Speaker 1: that she thinks that I was Latino. My birth country

1688
01:15:38,200 --> 01:15:40,759
Speaker 1: never really came up as I speak with an American accent,

1689
01:15:40,840 --> 01:15:43,640
Speaker 1: and she used a racist word against my own countryman

1690
01:15:43,840 --> 01:15:45,559
Speaker 1: in front of me. We get dessert, I get up

1691
01:15:45,600 --> 01:15:47,320
Speaker 1: to use the bathroom, I pay off the bill with

1692
01:15:47,400 --> 01:15:49,519
Speaker 1: a good tip, and I walk out the door. I

1693
01:15:49,640 --> 01:15:52,559
Speaker 1: left her there. I drove both of us nice and

1694
01:15:52,640 --> 01:15:55,439
Speaker 1: went back and blocked her number. Now I'm even thinking

1695
01:15:55,479 --> 01:15:57,720
Speaker 1: of switching gyms, but I'm just going to go in

1696
01:15:57,720 --> 01:16:00,000
Speaker 1: the morning For now. I don't know what I will

1697
01:16:00,080 --> 01:16:02,200
Speaker 1: say if I ever meet her again. Am I the

1698
01:16:02,360 --> 01:16:07,200
Speaker 1: a whole for ditching my date without transport at the restaurant?

1699
01:16:07,520 --> 01:16:09,559
Speaker 3: Ladies and gentlemen, we need your.

1700
01:16:09,439 --> 01:16:12,400
Speaker 1: Take also if any of you have had a experience

1701
01:16:12,560 --> 01:16:15,120
Speaker 1: like this, which have you ever walked out walked out

1702
01:16:15,120 --> 01:16:17,280
Speaker 1: of a dawn to date? There are many date walkout

1703
01:16:17,280 --> 01:16:19,519
Speaker 1: stories amongst you. Also, you better get to that comment

1704
01:16:19,520 --> 01:16:22,320
Speaker 1: section and tell us Sam same question to you.

1705
01:16:22,520 --> 01:16:25,160
Speaker 2: I might have said, like like in the moment, like

1706
01:16:25,280 --> 01:16:25,920
Speaker 2: you know, it's.

1707
01:16:25,760 --> 01:16:29,400
Speaker 3: Like there's like educational yeah, opportunity.

1708
01:16:28,880 --> 01:16:31,320
Speaker 2: There, educational opportunity, yeah, and it doesn't have to be

1709
01:16:31,479 --> 01:16:34,599
Speaker 2: nice education at all. But I think you could have said, hey,

1710
01:16:34,680 --> 01:16:37,639
Speaker 2: I'm actually Pakistani. That was really up. I'm not driving

1711
01:16:37,680 --> 01:16:39,280
Speaker 2: you home. I'm gonna pay for the check and leave

1712
01:16:39,400 --> 01:16:42,240
Speaker 2: totally just kind of be up front of it about it.

1713
01:16:42,560 --> 01:16:44,559
Speaker 2: You do not have to drive her home after that.

1714
01:16:44,760 --> 01:16:48,960
Speaker 2: The totally not saying anything doesn't allow her to realize

1715
01:16:49,000 --> 01:16:49,599
Speaker 2: how much.

1716
01:16:49,439 --> 01:16:51,479
Speaker 1: She done could be let off the hook because also

1717
01:16:51,720 --> 01:16:54,800
Speaker 1: maybe she's like, oh, like, was it something else? Yeah,

1718
01:16:55,000 --> 01:16:57,280
Speaker 1: Like maybe she's so blind to her own bigotry that

1719
01:16:57,320 --> 01:16:58,760
Speaker 1: she doesn't even consider that part of it.

1720
01:16:58,840 --> 01:17:00,479
Speaker 2: She's like, oh, he's Oh, he's just a hole. He

1721
01:17:00,479 --> 01:17:02,479
Speaker 2: didn't think I was pretty enough for something. Yeah. And

1722
01:17:02,520 --> 01:17:06,480
Speaker 2: then it also like doing that there reduces the confrontation

1723
01:17:06,600 --> 01:17:08,639
Speaker 2: that you might face at the gym at a later date.

1724
01:17:08,800 --> 01:17:10,719
Speaker 2: I don't think op, he is the a hole. Okay,

1725
01:17:10,800 --> 01:17:13,639
Speaker 2: he could have taken it to a place of learning,

1726
01:17:13,880 --> 01:17:17,439
Speaker 2: for sure. I uninvited my fiance's best friend from the

1727
01:17:17,439 --> 01:17:20,320
Speaker 2: wedding after he told him to get a paternity test?

1728
01:17:20,560 --> 01:17:21,400
Speaker 3: Am I the A hole?

1729
01:17:21,640 --> 01:17:24,679
Speaker 1: We've seen it happen a thousand times. Asking for paternity

1730
01:17:24,720 --> 01:17:26,320
Speaker 1: tests most of the time does.

1731
01:17:26,160 --> 01:17:26,800
Speaker 3: Not end well.

1732
01:17:26,960 --> 01:17:29,479
Speaker 2: My fiance male thirty three has a best friend, Jason,

1733
01:17:29,520 --> 01:17:32,360
Speaker 2: who is the brutally honest type and tells it how

1734
01:17:32,360 --> 01:17:35,439
Speaker 2: it is. In other words, he's yep. He himself admitted

1735
01:17:35,479 --> 01:17:37,960
Speaker 2: how he isn't good at keeping his thoughts in his

1736
01:17:38,080 --> 01:17:40,679
Speaker 2: head and losing so much because of it. My fiance

1737
01:17:40,840 --> 01:17:44,120
Speaker 2: says he loves him despite his flawed personality and expects

1738
01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:47,200
Speaker 2: me to let it go whenever he makes a backhanded

1739
01:17:47,280 --> 01:17:51,160
Speaker 2: comment about me and my past as a former sex worker.

1740
01:17:51,280 --> 01:17:53,280
Speaker 2: He was the first to be invited to the wedding,

1741
01:17:53,439 --> 01:17:56,479
Speaker 2: and my fiance promised to make him behave my fiance

1742
01:17:56,680 --> 01:17:58,920
Speaker 2: and I have found out that we were expecting. We

1743
01:17:59,080 --> 01:18:01,720
Speaker 2: visited my future law's house to make the announcement and

1744
01:18:01,800 --> 01:18:04,680
Speaker 2: Jason was already there. After dinner, my fiance and I

1745
01:18:04,760 --> 01:18:09,599
Speaker 2: stood up and made the announcements. Everyone rushed to congratulate us,

1746
01:18:09,800 --> 01:18:13,639
Speaker 2: except for Jason, who sat still and admittedly kept looking

1747
01:18:13,680 --> 01:18:16,919
Speaker 2: me in the eyes in a strange way. No Jason,

1748
01:18:17,160 --> 01:18:19,880
Speaker 2: I avoided him, but then he got up, hugged my

1749
01:18:19,920 --> 01:18:24,160
Speaker 2: fiance and looked him deadly eye and says three wordsman,

1750
01:18:24,560 --> 01:18:28,080
Speaker 2: paternity test pronto. No.

1751
01:18:28,840 --> 01:18:30,679
Speaker 3: I was completely floored.

1752
01:18:30,880 --> 01:18:34,240
Speaker 2: Everyone was shocked but tried to act normal, probably to

1753
01:18:34,360 --> 01:18:37,160
Speaker 2: diffuse the situation. But I walked up to Jason and

1754
01:18:37,200 --> 01:18:40,200
Speaker 2: asked him to repeat what he said. He tried to

1755
01:18:40,240 --> 01:18:42,880
Speaker 2: back off because my face was inches away from his.

1756
01:18:43,080 --> 01:18:46,280
Speaker 3: He was like, chill, it was just a joke, but.

1757
01:18:46,240 --> 01:18:48,920
Speaker 2: I kept asking him to repeat what he said over

1758
01:18:49,320 --> 01:18:51,960
Speaker 2: and over again. My fiance got in the middle and

1759
01:18:52,040 --> 01:18:54,439
Speaker 2: told me to take a seat and calm down. I

1760
01:18:54,479 --> 01:18:58,559
Speaker 2: went off on Jason called him an insensitive asshole and

1761
01:18:58,560 --> 01:19:01,240
Speaker 2: that he was officially on a invited from the wedding

1762
01:19:01,360 --> 01:19:05,360
Speaker 2: after he accused me of being unfaithful. Boom my drop.

1763
01:19:05,520 --> 01:19:08,280
Speaker 2: Jason shouted some stuff about how I was being a

1764
01:19:08,360 --> 01:19:14,559
Speaker 2: drama lama's what an insult of uh? And he meant

1765
01:19:14,600 --> 01:19:16,879
Speaker 2: no harm and then left in a hurry. My fiance

1766
01:19:17,000 --> 01:19:19,519
Speaker 2: and his mom agreed with me being upset, but said

1767
01:19:19,520 --> 01:19:22,880
Speaker 2: that uninviting him from the wedding was me going too far.

1768
01:19:23,160 --> 01:19:25,640
Speaker 2: My fiance said that Jason was just joking, and I

1769
01:19:25,640 --> 01:19:27,920
Speaker 2: blew up over nothing. We went home and I kind

1770
01:19:27,960 --> 01:19:30,320
Speaker 2: of broke down in the bathroom without letting my fiance

1771
01:19:30,520 --> 01:19:33,840
Speaker 2: see because he still thought I was overreacting after I

1772
01:19:33,920 --> 01:19:37,040
Speaker 2: told him how I felt about his friend ruining my

1773
01:19:37,240 --> 01:19:40,120
Speaker 2: joy and humiliating me in front of my in laws?

1774
01:19:40,240 --> 01:19:44,720
Speaker 2: Am I overreacting and being too emotional here? I want

1775
01:19:44,760 --> 01:19:47,360
Speaker 2: to know what all of you think if you had

1776
01:19:47,560 --> 01:19:50,760
Speaker 2: just announced your pregnancy and the best friend of your

1777
01:19:50,800 --> 01:19:53,720
Speaker 2: fiance said that should get a paternity test, would you

1778
01:19:53,720 --> 01:19:55,360
Speaker 2: want to invite that friend from the wedding and what

1779
01:19:55,439 --> 01:19:57,160
Speaker 2: do you feel bad about it? Put your answers in

1780
01:19:57,160 --> 01:19:59,519
Speaker 2: the comments right now, John, what do you think I

1781
01:20:00,000 --> 01:20:01,680
Speaker 2: I don't know why he's still friends with this guy. I

1782
01:20:01,680 --> 01:20:05,120
Speaker 2: know clearly he sounds so stupid, so just like he

1783
01:20:05,200 --> 01:20:08,160
Speaker 2: just he doesn't care about people's feelings, and like also

1784
01:20:08,439 --> 01:20:11,599
Speaker 2: her fiance and the mom aren't caring about her feelings,

1785
01:20:11,600 --> 01:20:14,000
Speaker 2: Like why would you let him say that to her?

1786
01:20:14,120 --> 01:20:16,519
Speaker 1: And it sounds like he is a pattern of this too, yes,

1787
01:20:16,640 --> 01:20:18,560
Speaker 1: like it is known that he does this, So I

1788
01:20:18,600 --> 01:20:20,320
Speaker 1: don't understand, Like what is he going to say at

1789
01:20:20,320 --> 01:20:21,880
Speaker 1: the wedding? What's he going to say at the wedding?

1790
01:20:22,000 --> 01:20:24,439
Speaker 1: And the best man toast, well, I would never want

1791
01:20:24,439 --> 01:20:26,600
Speaker 1: someone treating my wife to be like that, So like,

1792
01:20:26,800 --> 01:20:30,200
Speaker 1: I don't know. He was absolutely the ahole, op not

1793
01:20:30,240 --> 01:20:33,360
Speaker 1: the a whole? Uninvited him. Why your wedding, it's your

1794
01:20:33,400 --> 01:20:34,200
Speaker 1: freaking wedding.

1795
01:20:34,479 --> 01:20:38,040
Speaker 2: I kidnapped my ex wife autistic brother, and she's never

1796
01:20:38,120 --> 01:20:39,040
Speaker 2: going to see him again?

1797
01:20:39,120 --> 01:20:39,960
Speaker 3: Am I the a hole?

1798
01:20:40,200 --> 01:20:43,400
Speaker 2: My forty two male ex wife forty four female and

1799
01:20:43,439 --> 01:20:46,479
Speaker 2: I recently separated. We were together for twenty six years.

1800
01:20:46,520 --> 01:20:49,000
Speaker 2: We met in high school wow A and during that time,

1801
01:20:49,040 --> 01:20:52,120
Speaker 2: her parents became unable to care for her brother, Brody

1802
01:20:52,240 --> 01:20:55,000
Speaker 2: thirty four male, who is autistic. Brody moved in with

1803
01:20:55,040 --> 01:20:57,760
Speaker 2: my wife and I ten years ago, and while there

1804
01:20:57,920 --> 01:21:01,080
Speaker 2: was an adjustment period, he lived with us happily since then.

1805
01:21:01,320 --> 01:21:05,280
Speaker 2: My marriage's deterioration was completely unrelated to Brody and was

1806
01:21:05,320 --> 01:21:08,920
Speaker 2: centered around my wife's emotional affair with a coworker likes.

1807
01:21:09,960 --> 01:21:12,479
Speaker 2: When deciding what to do about Brody's living arrangements, I

1808
01:21:12,560 --> 01:21:14,960
Speaker 2: stated that Brody could live with me, but my wife

1809
01:21:15,000 --> 01:21:17,920
Speaker 2: overrode me and demanded Brody come with her. I said,

1810
01:21:18,040 --> 01:21:20,679
Speaker 2: I didn't think this was fair because Brody is verbal.

1811
01:21:20,880 --> 01:21:23,280
Speaker 2: He stated his preferences were to stay at my house.

1812
01:21:23,439 --> 01:21:26,559
Speaker 2: His autism is fairly mild and he is capable of

1813
01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:29,800
Speaker 2: making his preferences known. My wife overrode him and took

1814
01:21:29,840 --> 01:21:32,679
Speaker 2: him with her when she moved out. However, since then,

1815
01:21:32,800 --> 01:21:35,439
Speaker 2: she called me asked me to come get him because

1816
01:21:35,560 --> 01:21:38,040
Speaker 2: he was giving her such a hard time letting him

1817
01:21:38,080 --> 01:21:40,320
Speaker 2: stay the night for a few days, then a week,

1818
01:21:40,360 --> 01:21:42,599
Speaker 2: and now it's been a few months since he spent

1819
01:21:42,640 --> 01:21:46,839
Speaker 2: the night with her at her apartment, Brody's essentially living there. Yeah.

1820
01:21:46,880 --> 01:21:49,240
Speaker 2: I consider Brody to be my brother too. I've known

1821
01:21:49,320 --> 01:21:52,439
Speaker 2: him since he was eight years old. Wow, I very

1822
01:21:52,560 --> 01:21:54,760
Speaker 2: much have a strong bond with him and I'd be

1823
01:21:54,840 --> 01:21:56,800
Speaker 2: fine if he stayed living with me until I was

1824
01:21:56,840 --> 01:21:58,120
Speaker 2: old and great, that's kind of cute.

1825
01:21:58,160 --> 01:22:00,120
Speaker 3: That is the sweetest thing.

1826
01:22:00,360 --> 01:22:02,840
Speaker 2: That is so freaking crue. My ex and her family

1827
01:22:02,880 --> 01:22:06,240
Speaker 2: are very unhappy about the situation, But my argument is

1828
01:22:06,320 --> 01:22:08,800
Speaker 2: and continues to be if they care about his happiness,

1829
01:22:08,880 --> 01:22:10,400
Speaker 2: they should listen to his opinions.

1830
01:22:10,560 --> 01:22:11,360
Speaker 3: He is an adult.

1831
01:22:11,600 --> 01:22:14,360
Speaker 2: Just because he has autism doesn't mean he doesn't have

1832
01:22:14,439 --> 01:22:18,120
Speaker 2: feelings and preferences. So am id a hole for letting

1833
01:22:18,160 --> 01:22:21,280
Speaker 2: my ex brother in law stay against his families wishes.

1834
01:22:21,640 --> 01:22:22,439
Speaker 3: I want to know what you.

1835
01:22:22,400 --> 01:22:25,040
Speaker 2: Think, especially anyone who I mean, I want to know

1836
01:22:25,040 --> 01:22:27,320
Speaker 2: what anyone thinks, but especially if you have like an

1837
01:22:27,360 --> 01:22:30,519
Speaker 2: autistic brother or sister. Would love to know your thoughts.

1838
01:22:30,600 --> 01:22:32,080
Speaker 2: But John, what do you think?

1839
01:22:32,280 --> 01:22:37,479
Speaker 1: This is the most freaking adorable, beautiful thing on planet Earth?

1840
01:22:37,560 --> 01:22:40,680
Speaker 1: And yeah, it's so odd where it's like okay, So

1841
01:22:41,080 --> 01:22:44,040
Speaker 1: first his ex wife is like, no, I don't care

1842
01:22:44,200 --> 01:22:45,599
Speaker 1: that you want to stay with him. You're gonna stay

1843
01:22:45,600 --> 01:22:47,760
Speaker 1: with me. Then the brother stays with her. She's like,

1844
01:22:47,960 --> 01:22:50,000
Speaker 1: it's too much. You take him for a few days.

1845
01:22:50,040 --> 01:22:51,640
Speaker 1: He takes it for a few days. He ends up

1846
01:22:51,680 --> 01:22:54,439
Speaker 1: basically moving in and then they're angry again, like like

1847
01:22:56,000 --> 01:22:56,880
Speaker 1: make up your mind.

1848
01:22:57,000 --> 01:23:00,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think OP is taking the burden from you

1849
01:23:00,280 --> 01:23:03,280
Speaker 2: guys who don't want to care for this literally kid,

1850
01:23:03,560 --> 01:23:04,320
Speaker 2: literally a fault.

1851
01:23:04,760 --> 01:23:08,680
Speaker 1: And I just struggle to find the logic because it's like,

1852
01:23:08,920 --> 01:23:12,520
Speaker 1: you're mad at him when he wants.

1853
01:23:12,439 --> 01:23:14,200
Speaker 3: To bring him in but isn't living there.

1854
01:23:14,320 --> 01:23:16,280
Speaker 1: Then you're mad at him when he is living there

1855
01:23:16,320 --> 01:23:19,240
Speaker 1: and you don't, you know, want to house him.

1856
01:23:19,560 --> 01:23:21,679
Speaker 3: So it's like make make the math.

1857
01:23:21,760 --> 01:23:24,760
Speaker 2: Seems like OP is solving all of your problems. I'm

1858
01:23:24,760 --> 01:23:27,120
Speaker 2: literally it really doesn't make sense in a beautiful way.

1859
01:23:27,240 --> 01:23:29,760
Speaker 2: So maybe maybe this is like uh, and you know,

1860
01:23:29,800 --> 01:23:30,120
Speaker 2: we don't.

1861
01:23:30,160 --> 01:23:32,559
Speaker 1: We didn't get insight as to why they split, but

1862
01:23:32,800 --> 01:23:36,080
Speaker 1: I'm already seeing some like red flag behavior from the wife,

1863
01:23:36,240 --> 01:23:37,759
Speaker 1: Like so screw the wife.

1864
01:23:37,800 --> 01:23:40,320
Speaker 3: Maybe that's what it is. You don't screw let her

1865
01:23:40,400 --> 01:23:42,639
Speaker 3: be let her screw the coworker.

1866
01:23:42,760 --> 01:23:46,840
Speaker 1: Oh goodness, gracious, hello there, you're about to listen to

1867
01:23:46,960 --> 01:23:50,400
Speaker 1: an exclusive clip from our Patreon episode. If you want

1868
01:23:50,400 --> 01:23:53,200
Speaker 1: to hear the full bonus episodes, as well as ad

1869
01:23:53,200 --> 01:23:57,160
Speaker 1: free content and assholes anonymous events, go to patreon dot com.

1870
01:23:57,160 --> 01:24:02,000
Speaker 1: Slash OKAYOP Show and supports your boys. Enjoy the exclusive clip.

1871
01:24:02,240 --> 01:24:05,400
Speaker 2: Today, I afked up by having sex with my ex.

1872
01:24:05,680 --> 01:24:05,960
Speaker 3: Dude.

1873
01:24:05,960 --> 01:24:09,080
Speaker 2: We love our good rhyme. Points for rhyming, Yeah, points

1874
01:24:09,080 --> 01:24:13,320
Speaker 2: for dirty smuttiness, points for relatability. Yeah, agreed. Last week,

1875
01:24:13,479 --> 01:24:17,160
Speaker 2: my ex girlfriend twenty called and asked if I, twenty

1876
01:24:17,160 --> 01:24:19,880
Speaker 2: two male, was keen to continue sleeping with her.

1877
01:24:20,040 --> 01:24:20,840
Speaker 3: Ooh.

1878
01:24:20,880 --> 01:24:24,120
Speaker 2: I never expected to hear from her again, let alone

1879
01:24:24,320 --> 01:24:27,000
Speaker 2: see her naked. Our relationship recently came to an end.

1880
01:24:27,120 --> 01:24:29,280
Speaker 2: I tapped out because it became clear to me that

1881
01:24:29,320 --> 01:24:32,320
Speaker 2: the two of us were incompatible. My ex disagreed and

1882
01:24:32,360 --> 01:24:35,719
Speaker 2: thought screaming at me would somehow change my opinion. Considering

1883
01:24:35,760 --> 01:24:38,480
Speaker 2: how upset she was during a breakup, I was surprised

1884
01:24:38,520 --> 01:24:42,000
Speaker 2: when I got the call asking her for that sweet dingling.

1885
01:24:42,040 --> 01:24:43,519
Speaker 3: Oh you know that's a little booty call.

1886
01:24:43,640 --> 01:24:45,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe that's why she was so mad. She was like,

1887
01:24:45,439 --> 01:24:49,000
Speaker 2: oh damn, I'm gonna lose that losing access. Of course,

1888
01:24:49,120 --> 01:24:51,160
Speaker 2: all she wanted was to share in bed with someone

1889
01:24:51,200 --> 01:24:54,120
Speaker 2: who knew her well enough to know what buttons depressed

1890
01:24:54,160 --> 01:24:57,400
Speaker 2: to get her off, not gonna lie. The unexpected ego

1891
01:24:57,439 --> 01:25:00,680
Speaker 2: boost disarmed me. Her closing comment was scratch out the

1892
01:25:00,720 --> 01:25:04,400
Speaker 2: friends in friends. Oh wow, scratch out the friends in

1893
01:25:04,479 --> 01:25:08,400
Speaker 2: friends with benefits, but keep the benefits. So I was

1894
01:25:08,439 --> 01:25:10,840
Speaker 2: willing to test it out. Okay, what could go wrong?

1895
01:25:10,880 --> 01:25:15,559
Speaker 3: Ope? What good times in bed? Oh my god.

1896
01:25:15,920 --> 01:25:18,320
Speaker 2: Last night my ex and I reunited for the first

1897
01:25:18,320 --> 01:25:21,400
Speaker 2: time since the dramatic final episode of a relationship.

1898
01:25:21,520 --> 01:25:23,599
Speaker 3: She followed me to my room and we hooked up.

1899
01:25:23,640 --> 01:25:24,479
Speaker 3: I will Oh my god.

1900
01:25:24,640 --> 01:25:28,080
Speaker 2: I woke up this morning with one arm cuffed to

1901
01:25:28,160 --> 01:25:31,000
Speaker 2: my bed. My ex was gone. A random note on

1902
01:25:31,080 --> 01:25:33,600
Speaker 2: the pillow said the key for the handcuffs was in

1903
01:25:33,720 --> 01:25:37,080
Speaker 2: the condom under the pillow. I flipped the pillow and

1904
01:25:37,120 --> 01:25:40,599
Speaker 2: discovered the condom a use condom, but not the condom

1905
01:25:40,680 --> 01:25:45,880
Speaker 2: I used, different brand, different size, different load. Oh my.

1906
01:25:46,160 --> 01:25:47,760
Speaker 2: I did what had to be done to get the

1907
01:25:47,840 --> 01:25:50,880
Speaker 2: key out from the condom and unlocked the handcuffs. It

1908
01:25:50,960 --> 01:25:53,400
Speaker 2: was like a fear Factor challenge, but all you get

1909
01:25:53,600 --> 01:25:57,240
Speaker 2: is some dude's nut juice on your fingers. So she

1910
01:25:57,400 --> 01:26:00,719
Speaker 2: brought another man's condom to his apartment to prank them.

1911
01:26:00,800 --> 01:26:02,400
Speaker 2: I mean, I think this is more than a prank.

1912
01:26:02,720 --> 01:26:04,680
Speaker 3: I think it's just a prank bro, just.

1913
01:26:04,640 --> 01:26:07,000
Speaker 1: A prank bro. As long as you say it's just

1914
01:26:07,040 --> 01:26:07,920
Speaker 1: a prank brobe.

1915
01:26:08,160 --> 01:26:10,840
Speaker 3: She didn't say that. Sure, see bike mistake. There you

1916
01:26:10,920 --> 01:26:11,719
Speaker 3: go huge.

1917
01:26:11,760 --> 01:26:14,280
Speaker 2: Without wasting time, I disposed of the condom, the key,

1918
01:26:14,360 --> 01:26:17,400
Speaker 2: the cuffs, and the pillow before tossing all my sheets

1919
01:26:17,400 --> 01:26:20,920
Speaker 2: in the laundry and scrubbing my hands with disinfectant. I

1920
01:26:21,120 --> 01:26:23,760
Speaker 2: was fuming. Yeah, you have every right to be op,

1921
01:26:24,000 --> 01:26:26,879
Speaker 2: but I was prepared to file my experience under crazy

1922
01:26:26,920 --> 01:26:29,880
Speaker 2: ex girlfriend and never communicate with my X again.

1923
01:26:29,920 --> 01:26:31,360
Speaker 3: However, I soon.

1924
01:26:31,200 --> 01:26:35,000
Speaker 2: Realized she did more than plant another person's use condom

1925
01:26:35,080 --> 01:26:35,679
Speaker 2: under my pillow.

1926
01:26:35,760 --> 01:26:36,479
Speaker 3: She did more than that.

1927
01:26:36,840 --> 01:26:38,400
Speaker 2: We not done yet. Maybe.

1928
01:26:38,520 --> 01:26:41,439
Speaker 1: Thanks again for listening to this exclusive clip of our

1929
01:26:41,479 --> 01:26:42,799
Speaker 1: patron bonus episode.

1930
01:26:42,920 --> 01:26:45,639
Speaker 2: Remember if you want the full bonus episode in all of.

1931
01:26:45,560 --> 01:26:49,519
Speaker 1: Our extra beautiful perks, go to patreon dot com slash

1932
01:26:49,560 --> 01:26:50,519
Speaker 1: okal P Show.

1933
01:26:51,000 --> 01:26:52,559
Speaker 3: See you there, Love you,