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Speaker 1: It's that time time time, time, Luck and Load. The

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Speaker 1: Michael Verie Show is on the air.

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Speaker 2: The superintendent of schools in Iowa, in the largest school

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Speaker 2: district in the state. It turns out it is a really,

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Speaker 2: really bad guy. It turns out he's in the country illegally.

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Speaker 2: He insisted he be called doctor as if he has

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Speaker 2: a doctorate, but he doesn't. He was making over three

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Speaker 2: hundred thousand dollars in a job in a country where

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Speaker 2: he's not even authorized to work. He was found with

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Speaker 2: a gun he's not authorized to carry, three thousand dollars

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Speaker 2: cash and a very very question a set of circumstances

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Speaker 2: that landed him where he was. How on earth did

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Speaker 2: this happen? Oh and by the way, he voted in

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Speaker 2: twenty twenty four, As it turns out, a lot of

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Speaker 2: illegal aliens vote. Don't believe me. Charlie Colleen is the

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Speaker 2: Texas state director of Americans for Citizens Voting and he's

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Speaker 2: our guest. Welcome to the program sir.

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Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it.

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Speaker 2: So, first of all, tell us what Americans for Citizens

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Speaker 2: Voting is.

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Speaker 3: Yes, So, Americans for Citizens Voting is a nationwide movement

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Speaker 3: to make sure that only US citizens are voting in

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Speaker 3: all elections.

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Speaker 2: I didn't expect you to answer so succinctly. You would

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Speaker 2: be a great guest in deposition A great depots and

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Speaker 2: so you know, the average person says, well, of course,

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Speaker 2: you have to be a American to vote in American elections.

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Speaker 2: Why do we need this organization?

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Speaker 3: Well, this is the thing. So many states are what

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Speaker 3: you would call home rule states. And in a home

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Speaker 3: rule state, a local government municipality they can choose who

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Speaker 3: votes in their elections. So they could say, hey, anyone

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Speaker 3: attending or anyone within our school district is allowed to

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Speaker 3: vote in our local elections. And so we're founded with

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Speaker 3: the core mission to make sure that only US citizens

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Speaker 3: are voting in all elections.

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Speaker 2: So well, I'm going to ask some very basic questions

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Speaker 2: to establish as facts. There are parts of this country

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Speaker 2: where the local where the municipality home rule municipality is

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Speaker 2: aware that illegal aliens are voting and perfectly comfortable with that.

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Speaker 3: Correct. So San Francisco, Chicago, Washington, these are some big

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Speaker 3: cities that allow non citizens to vote in their elections. Currently,

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Speaker 3: Texas is a home rule state. So Prop sixteen, if

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Speaker 3: it passes it would clarify that only US citizens can

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Speaker 3: vote in all of Texas's elections, and that is on

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Speaker 3: the ballot win November of this year.

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Speaker 2: And so Proposition sixteen would enshrine citizen only voting in

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Speaker 2: the Texas Constitution this November. That would mean that if

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Speaker 2: some communist city like Austin wanted to have wanted to

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Speaker 2: allow it legal aliens to vote, they would not be

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Speaker 2: allowed to.

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Speaker 3: Do that, correct, And we think it's really important that

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Speaker 3: it shows up in the constitution that way. It's enshrined there.

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Speaker 3: I mean, citizenship is really a privilege, and with that

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Speaker 3: comes voting. We really believe that people take a longer

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Speaker 3: term view on their country, on their state when they're

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Speaker 3: a citizen versus just being a guest. So we just

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Speaker 3: feel it's very crucially important that this is enshrined in

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Speaker 3: Texas's constitution.

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Speaker 2: Just reading from the pages of your own site, is

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Speaker 2: non citizen voting allowed in the US. In nineteen ninety six,

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Speaker 2: the US Congress passed the law prohibiting non citizens from

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Speaker 2: voting in federal elections such as US House, Senate, and

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Speaker 2: presidential elections. Federal law did not address state or local elections.

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Speaker 2: As of May of twenty twenty five. Just a few

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Speaker 2: months ago, Washington, d C. And municipalities in three states California, Maryland,

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Speaker 2: and Vermont allowed non citizens to vote in local elections.

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Speaker 2: And then you show a map of where that is.

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Speaker 2: Do you have a sense of how much of a

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Speaker 2: difference that has made in say San Francisco elections or

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Speaker 2: Chicago elections. What percentage of those voters are non citizens?

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Speaker 2: Is that possible for you to know?

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean, ultimately, what I believe is everything you said.

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Speaker 3: So it's not clear who can vote in these local

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Speaker 3: elections based on that federal law. So fifteen states have

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Speaker 3: already passed citizens only voting amendments, and that's why we

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Speaker 3: feel it's really crucial to make sure that only US

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Speaker 3: citizens are voting in all of these elections. And here's

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Speaker 3: the thing. I mean, if you're in this country and

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Speaker 3: you're not a US citizen, ultimately you're a guest. You

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Speaker 3: wouldn't go over to someone's house as a guest and

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Speaker 3: tell them how to rearrange their furniture or change the

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Speaker 3: art on their wall. And with these crucial decisions that

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Speaker 3: really are based on choosing the leaders or deciding on policy,

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Speaker 3: it should only be US citizens voting in these elections.

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Speaker 2: It's crazy that we even have to have this conversation.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I can't imagine going to China and casting

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Speaker 2: a vote in their elections. I mean, I can't imagine

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Speaker 2: that any Chinaman would think that would argue to other Chinamen, No, no, no,

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Speaker 2: he should get to vote here, even though he has

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Speaker 2: nothing to do with the country. It's crazy to me

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Speaker 2: to think, So, what effort, what are you making? Obviously

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Speaker 2: proposition sixteen, How did this start, Who's been behind it,

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Speaker 2: what does it look like? How would it be enforced?

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Speaker 3: Well, that question that you brought up, or I would say,

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Speaker 3: like saying, why is this an issue? I can't believe

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Speaker 3: we're having this conversation. I have that all the time.

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Speaker 3: It took over three years in the Texas Legislator to

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Speaker 3: get this passed, two legislative sessions. So I mean, we

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Speaker 3: really needed to do a good job at convincing Democrats

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Speaker 3: in the state legislator to see the wisdom in passing this.

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Speaker 3: And I mean, this isn't a question of immigration. This

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Speaker 3: is purely a question of citizenship and voting. So, I mean,

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Speaker 3: it was a very big legislative campaign to get it

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Speaker 3: through the Texas Legislator, one of the only states actually

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Speaker 3: where the Republicans didn't control both the House and Senate

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Speaker 3: with super majorities. So we're very optimistic. I mean, when

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Speaker 3: you look at the polling on this, over eighty percent

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Speaker 3: I believe of Texans are in favor of this, So ultimately,

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Speaker 3: coming election day, I do think will be successful. But

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Speaker 3: really the most important thing right now is getting the

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Speaker 3: word out and letting people know it's going to be

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Speaker 3: on the ballot. I believe there's seventeen questions on the ballot,

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Speaker 3: seventeen proposals, so we've got to make sure people go

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Speaker 3: all the way down to Proposition sixteen and vote yes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. The challenge isn't going to be winning the hearts

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Speaker 2: and minds of the people who show up to vote

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Speaker 2: in favor of Proposition sixteen. The problem is going to

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Speaker 2: be getting people to actually show up. I think we

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Speaker 2: can win the hearts and minds that yes, Proposition sixteen

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Speaker 2: is a good thing. My concern is getting people to

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Speaker 2: vote when they don't see anything else of interest on

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Speaker 2: the ballot. And we will have a contested congressional race

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Speaker 2: right here in Houston in the Congressional District eighteen, Shila

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Speaker 2: Jackson Lee's old seat that then Sylvester Turner held for

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Speaker 2: a moment. And so there will be Democrats showing up

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Speaker 2: to vote, and we know that they tend to get

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Speaker 2: this issue very very wrong. Charlie, I am delighted to

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Speaker 2: know that you're out there. I am delighted to know

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Speaker 2: that Americans for Citizens voting is out there and that

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Speaker 2: you're doing good work when no one else is looking.

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Speaker 2: And I encourage folks to learn more about what he's

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Speaker 2: doing and support this effort.

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Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it.

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Speaker 4: Right, I'm Gila Chelae.

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Speaker 1: The Michael Very Show.

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Speaker 5: You merely adopted the doc.

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Speaker 4: I was bording it.

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Speaker 2: So John Wayne mccorny has hit the airwaves with a

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Speaker 2: big buy out of DC. Because if the Swamp can

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Speaker 2: spend enough money, they can convince enough of you to

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Speaker 2: send somebody back who works against your interests. That's the play.

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Speaker 2: So anybody you know that it's for cornying, just under

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Speaker 2: stand they are as stupid as the swamp thinks they are.

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Speaker 2: And to be clear, we have neighbors who are that stupid.

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Speaker 2: We have neighbors that kral Rove can push a button

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Speaker 2: and they will take some act that Karl Rove wants

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Speaker 2: them to take and think they did it of their

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Speaker 2: own volition. It's the craziest thing. And the worst part is,

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Speaker 2: you know these people, they're not necessarily bad people. If

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Speaker 2: they could actually see what John Wayne mccornyn is doing,

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Speaker 2: they'd be shocked. But you can't convince them of it

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Speaker 2: because they're the nice guy neighbor and they think he's

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Speaker 2: a nice guy too. Some coins and a nice guy.

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Speaker 2: He looks like a senator straight out of Central Castle.

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Speaker 2: You gotta be a good guy, God be Why do

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Speaker 2: you say that? Well, there was a Chamber of Commerce

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Speaker 2: lunch for Bear County a couple of months ago, and

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Speaker 2: I went and he spoke and he seemed I mean,

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Speaker 2: he seemed good, really really at the Bear County Chamber

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Speaker 2: Commerce lunch where he spoke, he seemed good. Okay, just

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Speaker 2: so I'm I'm I'm clear. What what about him seemed good? Well,

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Speaker 2: he was tell you what you should have heard it.

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Speaker 2: I was actually wishing you were there, Michael. Why. He

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Speaker 2: was talking about the Democrats and and he said, I

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Speaker 2: don't know if it's true, but he said Biden was

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Speaker 2: practically dead when he was president. He like, they wouldn't

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Speaker 2: tell anybody, but he was. He was practically dead. And

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Speaker 2: the Democrats, he said, that auto pen deal, he said,

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Speaker 2: that's legitimate, that they really did that. They that Biden

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Speaker 2: didn't know what was going on and they were they

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Speaker 2: were doing. That's what he said. And you know, I mean,

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Speaker 2: I gotta figure he knows what he saw about. You

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Speaker 2: know what I'm saying, Oh, okay, so he's we're gonna

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Speaker 2: reelect him on that basis. Well, I'm just saying, you know,

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Speaker 2: I'm I mean, you know, Paxton's you know, past is

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Speaker 2: no saint. You know he knows saint. But isn't that

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Speaker 2: what they did to Trump from sixteen? Don't you remember

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Speaker 2: grabbing them by the hoho do? Don't you remember Egen Carroll?

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Speaker 2: Don't you remember Republicans saying that Trump couldn't be our

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Speaker 2: nominee because he couldn't win in November because he wasn't

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Speaker 2: married to his high school sweetheart. Remember he was a

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Speaker 2: bad guy. Remember he'd been ahead of the Miss America

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Speaker 2: pageant and so you know there had to be something there,

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Speaker 2: and he'd been divorced more than once. We couldn't be

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Speaker 2: Christian and vote for him. Remember remember how that worked. Well,

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Speaker 2: John Wayne mccornan is a robot programmed by the establishment

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Speaker 2: out of DC to do what he is supposed to do.

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Speaker 2: Who's running ads on how close he and Trump are, Well,

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Speaker 2: there's a lot of things John wayn mccorny could say

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Speaker 2: that I wouldn't say he's lying about that is a lie.

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Speaker 2: Trump does not like him. And by the way, he

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Speaker 2: doesn't like Trump. It's easy, very easy to find, very

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Speaker 2: easy to find all the references that he made to

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Speaker 2: Trump shouldn't run in twenty twenty four posts. We're not

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Speaker 2: talking about twenty sixteen. Here, we're talking about he didn't

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Speaker 2: want him to be president right now as of last year.

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Speaker 2: How did he all of a sudden see the light

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Speaker 2: and become just just love Trump, just here to support Trump.

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Speaker 2: Y'all like Trump and so does he. Yep, we're all

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Speaker 2: in this together. We love Trump. I'm here, I'm fighting

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Speaker 2: for Trump ninety nine percent. You know why they had

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Speaker 2: to put the number ninety nine percent because the perception

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Speaker 2: is that he votes against Trump on everything. He doesn't

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Speaker 2: have to. When they name a post office for somebody,

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Speaker 2: he'll agree to that. So here's all we ask if

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Speaker 2: you voted against Trump one percent of the time, that's

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Speaker 2: not very many. Let's lay that out. Let's see what

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Speaker 2: that one percent looks like. So he's running ads and

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Speaker 2: how close he is with Donald Trump? And that's a joke.

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Speaker 1: John Wayne mccarneh is ready to trump the competition. Ye hauled,

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Speaker 1: giddy up, and let's go Texas. This's the old boy,

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Speaker 1: John Wayne McConney. Together with my right hand man, mister

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Speaker 1: Donald J. Trump, we'll take all those lack of days

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Speaker 1: ago looney lefts together. That's right. I just got off

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Speaker 1: the phone with mister Trump's assistant to his second assistant

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Speaker 1: at mar A Lago, and I may or may not

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Speaker 1: be playing golf with the President this weekend, whether his schedule,

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Speaker 1: family allegations, and mood pending. Now, after this possible golf outing,

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Speaker 1: I could possibly, maybe but not likely, be joining him

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Speaker 1: for dinner to destroy the evil of our country in

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Speaker 1: our great state of Texas. That's right, my fellow Texans.

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Speaker 1: As I've been told him many a time, Trump and

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Speaker 1: mccorn go together like Rosie o'donald and a chip membership. Hi,

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Speaker 1: look at this, boys, John Wayne mccornan actually read that

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Speaker 1: Rosie line. My name's John Wayne mcconnyn. I've been licking

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Speaker 1: the moot straps of Donald J. Trump for a few

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Speaker 1: months now, and I shamelessly approve of this message. What

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Speaker 1: elt you want?

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Speaker 6: Right? What do you want? You want to?

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Speaker 3: Michael Berry?

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Speaker 1: Just to say the word and I'll throw a glasshole

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Speaker 1: on it, pug down.

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Speaker 2: Donald Trump played Mario Hotson music at the White House

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Speaker 2: for Hakeem Jeffrey's visit to troll him, and we approved

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Speaker 2: very much. That's just the kind of sophomoric, in your

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Speaker 2: face humor that we need more of out of a president.

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Speaker 2: My goodness alive, Randy Rights, I like your saucet. No,

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Speaker 2: I just kidd Randy Wrights. Michael. On my way home

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Speaker 2: from Inez yesterday about eight thirty am, I and all

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Speaker 2: of southbound traffic was stopped by DPS at the exit

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Speaker 2: from the southbound rest stop to allow four to eight

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Speaker 2: flatbed eighteen wheelers carrying two armored personnel vehicles each, followed

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Speaker 2: by ten to fifteen two and a half ton military

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Speaker 2: troop transport vehicles, all O D Green brand new vehicle

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Speaker 2: with Mexican military logos on the doors. Mexican drivers in

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Speaker 2: od uniforms, all escorted by DPS, marked and other unmarked

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Speaker 2: suv with emergency lighting similar to DPS. The caravan was

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Speaker 2: about a mile long when I turned off at the

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Speaker 2: Victoria exit. Very well organized. I was very surprised, to

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Speaker 2: say the least, obviously headed to Mexico via the Rio

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Speaker 2: Grand Valley or west of there. You may have addressed

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Speaker 2: this issue already on the show. This was all new

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Speaker 2: military equipment. Let me know, saludos a ramone your friend

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Speaker 2: Randy in Inez. What which part saludos? That's just you know,

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Speaker 2: like a toast. He's toasting you. Yeah, it's just a

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Speaker 2: little toast to you. Oh, huge one. I wanted to

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Speaker 2: get to No, no, no, I do that story letter.

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Speaker 2: I do that story letter. We get into that story

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Speaker 2: in just moments. Oh there's a clip I want to play,

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Speaker 2: but I don't know if I have enough time in

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Speaker 2: this segment. That's what I'm battling with. I'm thinking thru Czar,

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Speaker 2: Your topic today made me laugh. I always sent notes

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Speaker 2: to my husband in his lunch, not every day, but

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Speaker 2: many days. They were I'm proud of you because thank

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Speaker 2: you for YadA YadA, and even some that were a

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Speaker 2: little bit racy. I'm gonna do this to you when

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Speaker 2: you get home. Sometimes they were just lipstick prints and

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Speaker 2: and I love you heart. I always figured he just

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Speaker 2: threw them away with his lunch. Well, he passed away

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Speaker 2: unexpectedly at fifty two. I was so surprised when I

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Speaker 2: found in his bedside table every note that I had

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Speaker 2: ever sent in his lunch, even a napkins I wrote on.

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Speaker 2: So Yes, your topic today made me smile. Thank you, cheers, Kelly.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna tell you something. When you bury somebody who

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Speaker 2: is dear to you, we say barry. A lot of

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Speaker 2: people cremate now, but I'll say barry. For the purposes

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Speaker 2: of somebody dying, there's a real odd thing that happens.

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Speaker 2: And those of you who buried your spouse, I'm sure

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Speaker 2: it's got to be worse, or your child, I cannot imagine.

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Speaker 2: But when you bury someone close to you, there is

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Speaker 2: a surreal tends to be the only word we use

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Speaker 2: for a whole wide range of things, because I don't

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Speaker 2: think we have the vocabulary for another one, nor do I.

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Speaker 2: But there is something, and I don't know the right

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Speaker 2: word to describe this emotion or this fear feeling, and

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Speaker 2: it's not that you're bawling. It's not that you're you

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Speaker 2: can't keep it together. It's just it's almost an uneasiness,

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Speaker 2: but not an uneasiness in necessarily a terrible way. There

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Speaker 2: is a very odd feeling when you bury someone that

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Speaker 2: you love and you go back to their space, you

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Speaker 2: go back to their bedside stand, you go back to

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Speaker 2: little mundane things, or even in some ways more odd,

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Speaker 2: you go back to the sink where they brush their teeth,

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Speaker 2: and you see their things, and it takes on a

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Speaker 2: whole new meaning, and it's almost indescribable because in some

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Speaker 2: ways it's extremely profound and in some ways it's extremely mundane.

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Speaker 2: And maybe that's what makes this moment, creates this this

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Speaker 2: uneasiness as to this space and what this space means,

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Speaker 2: because this space is from a physics perspective, in our

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Speaker 2: physical world, simply pieces of plastic, you know, formed into

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Speaker 2: a cup holder and a rod that has bristles on

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Speaker 2: the end. There's a toothbrush and a tube that has

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Speaker 2: some National Conglomerates product in there, and and then there's

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Speaker 2: there's a hair brush, which is just a bunch of plastic.

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Speaker 2: But that was their stuff, and that was what they used,

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Speaker 2: and part of you thinks, my goodness, I'm in the

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Speaker 2: presence of that person. That person is here. This was

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Speaker 2: their life, this was their life, this is where they stood,

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Speaker 2: this is the actions they took, this is how they

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Speaker 2: did them, this is this is the the essence of

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Speaker 2: that human being. And then part of you thinks, yeah,

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Speaker 2: but realistically, did those things really matter to them at all?

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Speaker 2: That's just the things that happen to be beside them

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Speaker 2: as they're going through their lives, and so you go

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Speaker 2: searching for things that were of meaning. You know, the

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Speaker 2: chair they love to sit in. For my brother, it

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Speaker 2: was his truck and his console, and I used to

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Speaker 2: One of the irritating things I do with friends of

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Speaker 2: mine is I have a theory that people carry too

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Speaker 2: much junk in their wallet. And so I will say,

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Speaker 2: you know, I bet you have a bunch of wasted

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Speaker 2: stuff in your wallet. And if you're a person who says, look,

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Speaker 2: I want to have a bunch of wasted stuff in

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Speaker 2: my wallet, so be it. I'm not a person to

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Speaker 2: bother you about it. But I think most people just

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Speaker 2: have become kind of a hoarder with their wallet don't

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Speaker 2: even realize it. So I'll say, I pull out my wallet,

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Speaker 2: which I take great pride in. It's two credit cards

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Speaker 2: and a in an ID, and it's the thinnest thing possible,

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Speaker 2: so I can put it in my back pocket. You

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Speaker 2: can hardly tell I have anything in my back pocket,

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Speaker 2: because I read an article years ago about back problems

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Speaker 2: from the wallet, and I'll say, I bet you've got

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Speaker 2: thirty things in your wallet that are wasteful.

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Speaker 1: Ah, So all.

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Speaker 2: Right, pull it out. And I always ask, you know,

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Speaker 2: is this going to get uncomfortable, like you know, some

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00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,520
Speaker 2: dude's rubber is going to fall out, like we're in

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Speaker 2: tenth grade? But I ask, and then I take things

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Speaker 2: out and they'll there will invariably be five or more

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Speaker 2: frequent user cards for a company that doesn't exist anymore.

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Speaker 2: Don't think we're going to need our Blockbuster card anymore?

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Speaker 2: Pretty sure we're good on that one. Can I throw that? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: And at this point it gets to be kind of

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Speaker 2: an embarrassment. Okay, Well, here's a frequent user card for

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Speaker 2: a fried chicken joint in Louisiana and you haven't lived

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Speaker 2: in Santamon in twenty years yet. Can I go ahead

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Speaker 2: and throw that? Yeah? Okay, here we have the assistant

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Speaker 2: manager at Hurts. Uh, this car looks like it's been

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Speaker 2: in here for ten years. Oh shoot, I forgot about that.

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Speaker 2: They had They had claimed that I wrecked the car

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Speaker 2: and I didn't. In that manager, she was willing to

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Speaker 2: help me, and so will we handle that issue? Yeah, okay,

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00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,439
Speaker 2: so we So we're three for three already. Things. We

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Speaker 2: don't need to be hauling around all thing. How long

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Speaker 2: you've hauled this thing around? He might get drunk.

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Speaker 1: Say no, I'm just having.

359
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:47,720
Speaker 2: He might Hey not that sums that donte Yeah, walk

360
00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:57,520
Speaker 2: walk walk. You can't get it?

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Speaker 1: Yes, say.

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00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:13,040
Speaker 2: It's way worse than what you play. Listener Daniel wrote,

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00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:16,640
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's really mariachi, but I'd eat

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00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:59,480
Speaker 2: some Mexican food to this. Well. Recently we had Roy

365
00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:07,600
Speaker 2: marshma friend from Everyone's Internet on and eventually AOL would

366
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:12,360
Speaker 2: dominate the field. But of course the times they are

367
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:17,400
Speaker 2: a changing and change is the only constant constant. And

368
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 2: so we have some very bad news to report. The

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Speaker 2: grandfather of the Internet world, AOL dial up Internet that's

370
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:36,000
Speaker 2: passed away. Who in the hell was still using AOL

371
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:42,680
Speaker 2: dial up Internet? Apparently somebody was, because the announcement has

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00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:47,560
Speaker 2: come that they finally shut it down, and somewhere some

373
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 2: ted Kazinski out in the little cabin is real bummed

374
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:58,240
Speaker 2: out because his solar crank and his stolen dial up

375
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:03,679
Speaker 2: Internet access is more. So, please bow your heads with me,

376
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:08,200
Speaker 2: and let's take a moment to honor the once great

377
00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 2: actually just sort of average at best. AOL dial up

378
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Speaker 2: Internet rest in peace.

379
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:28,119
Speaker 1: Friends. We are gathered here today to honor a fallen pioneer.

380
00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:36,120
Speaker 1: It wasn't the fastest, it wasn't the prettiest, but good

381
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 1: God on Matty, it was ours. I'm talking about.

382
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:45,480
Speaker 7: The AOL dillar be lant born in the days of

383
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:49,400
Speaker 7: pages and Tamagotchi's laid to rest sometime between you Got

384
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:53,119
Speaker 7: Mail and Netflix and Chin. We remember the sound that

385
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:58,119
Speaker 7: glorious screen squawk, robot making car I got too D

386
00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:03,080
Speaker 7: two being strangled with the czine, the national anthem of

387
00:27:03,119 --> 00:27:05,960
Speaker 7: the late nineties, A sound that met you was seconds

388
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:08,760
Speaker 7: away from checking your hotmail, printing out a map, quest

389
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 7: directions to Grandma's, and hoping that no one in the

390
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:12,720
Speaker 7: house is going to.

391
00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:17,080
Speaker 1: Pick up that phone. We remember the chat rooms, oh yes,

392
00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:22,640
Speaker 1: the chat rooms. Where asl was our declaration of independence,

393
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:28,240
Speaker 1: where we all became poets, we became philosophers, and lord,

394
00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:32,960
Speaker 1: we don't become liars. Yeah, I'm like totally eighteen stuff.

395
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:33,600
Speaker 2: Totally blind.

396
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,119
Speaker 1: No, I'm not sitting in Mom's basement in dunk a

397
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:40,639
Speaker 1: ruse Marpara made for frankfa Oh. We remember the AOL

398
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:44,520
Speaker 1: CDs mailed every American household, whether he one of them

399
00:27:44,600 --> 00:27:48,280
Speaker 1: or not, shiny coasters promising five hundred three hours, and

400
00:27:48,359 --> 00:27:51,679
Speaker 1: by nineteen ninety eight AOL and distributed so many CDs

401
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:55,240
Speaker 1: you could tell your kitchen backsplash with them, and some

402
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:56,439
Speaker 1: of us did ylt.

403
00:27:56,960 --> 00:28:03,159
Speaker 5: We remember the buffero Oh, the written images loaded like

404
00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:07,400
Speaker 5: a polaroid stuck in molasses, watching half of Pamela Anderson

405
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 5: jpeg load line by line like the world's slowest strip tease.

406
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:15,160
Speaker 1: A single picture could take three family arguments and our

407
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:20,359
Speaker 1: hot pocket to finish. We remember aim away messages, song lyrics,

408
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:24,080
Speaker 1: cryptic breakup quotes, and b RB bathroom. They were the

409
00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:28,000
Speaker 1: Facebook statues of their time. And if you're lucky, your

410
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,919
Speaker 1: crush left a message that made you wonder if maybe

411
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 1: it was about you. And yet, even in its flowers,

412
00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 1: AOL dial up gave us something It gave us the

413
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 1: patience of the saints, the cunning of the thieves, the

414
00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:45,840
Speaker 1: courage to tie up the family phone line for three

415
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 1: straight hours, knowing full well Dad was expecting get important calls.

416
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:51,800
Speaker 2: Son, I want to beat that butter of you on that.

417
00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:55,680
Speaker 1: Dial with me. So today, as we lay AOL dial

418
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 1: up to rest, let us not mourn what we've lost,

419
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:01,680
Speaker 1: to celebrate what we've gained.

420
00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 4: You've got mail, the memes, the chat handles, the glorious

421
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:11,280
Speaker 4: lies about being away while actually sitting right there refreshing

422
00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 4: your friend's list. Rest in peace, my good friend, Aoil,

423
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:19,160
Speaker 4: for though you were gone, your ghost lives on. Every

424
00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:21,960
Speaker 4: time Wi Fi drops during a zoom call and we

425
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:25,040
Speaker 4: all hear your faint whisper goodbye.

426
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:27,880
Speaker 2: Well can you hear that sound?

427
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:31,760
Speaker 1: Now, I'm gonna let the Diva doves take us home.

428
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 6: We waited patiently through that down tome book, collecting hot salt.

429
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:40,480
Speaker 2: That age sure, he swelled.

430
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:43,200
Speaker 3: Shee beef was a prayer in disguise.

431
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:47,200
Speaker 6: Building dreams on the pixel. Latest Scots Chicago emergency room

432
00:29:47,240 --> 00:29:53,080
Speaker 6: doctor's gone viral on TikTok for revealing the craziest object

433
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:56,440
Speaker 6: he's removed from a patient's.

434
00:29:56,400 --> 00:30:03,200
Speaker 2: But ready for this one. It was a desk top

435
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 2: candle jar, and of course the flavor pumpkin spice.

436
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 8: I don't know what it is, but whenever I tell

437
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,479
Speaker 8: people I'm an emergency room doctor, they always ask me

438
00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 8: two things. What is the sickest thing You've ever seen?

439
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 8: And what's the weirdest thing you've ever pulled out someone's butt?

440
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:24,960
Speaker 8: I see a lot of it. People come in with

441
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:26,000
Speaker 8: stuff up the butt.

442
00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:26,760
Speaker 2: I see.

443
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:29,920
Speaker 8: One of the most memorable ones was a guy came

444
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:33,920
Speaker 8: in whose complaint was personal problems, which I always know

445
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 8: is going to be usually butt stuff. I go in

446
00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 8: to see him and he says that he and his

447
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,560
Speaker 8: girlfriend got a little crazy last night or maybe two

448
00:30:42,640 --> 00:30:46,240
Speaker 8: days ago, put something up there and he can't get

449
00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,040
Speaker 8: it out. I said, you know what, no judgment, I

450
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,880
Speaker 8: get it. This was a Yankee candle and I'm not

451
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:53,240
Speaker 8: talking about just the little baby one. I'm talking about

452
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 8: the desktop jar and not just the top, but the

453
00:30:57,480 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 8: whole damn thing. So I stopped asking questions like how'd

454
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:04,360
Speaker 8: you get it up there? Or what were you thinking?

455
00:31:04,360 --> 00:31:07,480
Speaker 8: Because it's not important. The question now becomes how do

456
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 8: you get it out? And really, for things that are

457
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:11,840
Speaker 8: really big. You can't just reach up there and grab

458
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:15,160
Speaker 8: them and pull them out because the suction causes a

459
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 8: vacuum to pull it back in. So really the treatment

460
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:22,520
Speaker 8: is to paralyze them in the operating room with anesthesia

461
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:25,560
Speaker 8: like you would for an operation, although you don't operate

462
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:29,400
Speaker 8: on them, but it requires critical care, anesthesia, intubation, putting

463
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 8: them on a ventilator. You'd give them medication that relaxes

464
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 8: every muscle in their bodies so you can go up

465
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 8: and grab it, you know, and an er. We always

466
00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:39,720
Speaker 8: like to guess things like hemoglobin levels and alcohol levels

467
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:42,440
Speaker 8: and things like that. This time I won the bet

468
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:46,840
Speaker 8: pumpkin spice.

469
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 2: It was October.

470
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 8: It was easy.

471
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:56,880
Speaker 2: So when Kunda sent that around, he said, this just

472
00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:01,000
Speaker 2: goes to prove that pumpkin smut spice smells like ass,

473
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:05,640
Speaker 2: to which Jim Mudd responded, you have your head up yours.

474
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,720
Speaker 2: And we've had something of a raging debate going on

475
00:32:08,840 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 2: all morning as to whether pumpkin spice smells like ass

476
00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 2: or not. And I feel like we've gotten away from

477
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 2: the fact that a dude put a pumpkin spice candle

478
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:18,560
Speaker 2: up his butthole