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Speaker 1: Welcome back to Sheep Pivots. I'm Ali Kreeger.

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Speaker 2: Welcome back to Sheep Pivots. I'm your host, Emily Tish Sussman.

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Speaker 2: When I was planning this season, I wanted to make

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Speaker 2: sure she Pivots was a means for building connections. I

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Speaker 2: said during our season launch party that we're the generation

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Speaker 2: of women who build bridges and don't tear each other down,

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Speaker 2: and she pivots as a way to empower women to

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Speaker 2: look inward to find success for themselves and not by

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Speaker 2: society standards.

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Speaker 1: And it's working.

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Speaker 2: We're seeing a substantial change in the way women think

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Speaker 2: about and talk about their lives and their careers. I'm

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Speaker 2: so excited to dig deeper into these pivotal moments through

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Speaker 2: these shorter, more conversational, candid convos this season. Let's jump

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Speaker 2: right in. Joining us today is none other than Ali Krieger.

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Speaker 2: If you know soccer, then you know Ali known world worldwide,

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Speaker 2: she is a World Cup champion, an Olympic athlete, and

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Speaker 2: one of the most respected defenders in the game. As

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Speaker 2: the world gathers for the twenty twenty four Olympics, it's

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Speaker 2: the perfect time to reflect on the career of someone

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Speaker 2: who's done it before. This past fall, Ali announced her retirement,

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Speaker 2: marking the end of an incredibly successful career that spanned

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Speaker 2: almost two decades at the highest level of women's soccer.

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Speaker 2: Also this past fall, my family and I became co

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Speaker 2: owners of Gotham FC, just days before they took home

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Speaker 2: the National Women's Soccer League championship with Ali as the captain.

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Speaker 2: I remember that feeling in the stadium when they played,

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Speaker 2: and then when they won, you could feel that everyone

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Speaker 2: was behind them, especially Alli. The crowd would randomly break

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Speaker 2: out into chance of Ali Krieger. Ali's journey is one

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Speaker 2: of great determination and an unwavering passion for the sport.

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Speaker 2: From her early days playing in college to becoming a

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Speaker 2: cornerstone of the un US women's national team, Ali has

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Speaker 2: left an indelible mark on the pitch. She's not just

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Speaker 2: a phenomenal athlete. Ali is a trailblazer and an advocate

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Speaker 2: for equality and inclusion in sports. Her leadership on and

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Speaker 2: off the field has inspired a new generation of athletes

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Speaker 2: to dream big and fight for their place in the game. Today,

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Speaker 2: we'll be talking about her incredible career, the highs and lows,

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Speaker 2: the memorable moments and what lies ahead for her post retirement.

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Speaker 2: Will also dive deep into her experiences as an Olympic

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Speaker 2: athlete and some deeply personal moments she's gone through recently.

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Speaker 2: This is an episode you don't want to miss enjoy.

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Speaker 1: I'm Ali Kreeger.

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Speaker 3: I am a former World Cup champion, an Olympian end

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Speaker 3: of yusel champion. I played for Gotham FCUS women's national

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Speaker 3: team and I now live in New York and I'm

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Speaker 3: an ESPN soccer analyst.

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Speaker 2: Okay, so you're from You're from Virginia. You started playing

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Speaker 2: at a really young age. Did you just like go

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Speaker 2: on the pitch and it clicked?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? I did.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I honestly wanted to just hang out with

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Speaker 3: my brother all the time. My dad played soccer in

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Speaker 3: college and professionally. My mom was also an athlete. She

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Speaker 3: played softball and basketball, and it was just in our

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Speaker 3: family that that was kind of just our lifestyle.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 3: It ended up being, you know, just such an active

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Speaker 3: lifestyle growing up. And I loved my brother and I

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Speaker 3: just wanted to do everything he did. And I was

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Speaker 3: so competitive at a young age, and so I just

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Speaker 3: wanted to compete with him at everything he did, and

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Speaker 3: he started playing soccer, and so we played on the

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Speaker 3: same team. It was the Cosmos back when I was

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Speaker 3: you know, five and he was six, and I really

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Speaker 3: enjoyed it was like an indoor team, and I basically

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Speaker 3: just wanted to follow him around and do whatever he did.

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Speaker 3: And I ended up really loving it because maybe more

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Speaker 3: so because my best friends were playing and I had

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Speaker 3: friends on the team and that was a team environment

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Speaker 3: was like really fun for me when I was young.

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Speaker 3: But it was basically because of my brother that really

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Speaker 3: got me started. And my dad coached, so it kind

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Speaker 3: of was an easy, easy transition, you know, into the

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Speaker 3: sport because he was kind of guiding me in that way.

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Speaker 1: When did you get better than your brother? And was

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Speaker 1: he mad?

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Speaker 3: I think I was better than him maybe starting to

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Speaker 3: enter high school. Like he was always bigger, you know, faster, stronger,

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Speaker 3: and I'd always make him go out into the yard

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Speaker 3: and play like one bi one or you know, hit

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Speaker 3: it against the wall.

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Speaker 1: We had like a brick wall at our house.

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Speaker 3: And so I was like lucky enough to just like

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Speaker 3: go outside and just always have a passing partner and

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Speaker 3: I would go and maybe train with his team sometimes

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Speaker 3: and and vice versa. He would come and train with

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Speaker 3: us as well, and my teams. My dad was both

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Speaker 3: of our coaches, and it just yeah, I mean, I

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Speaker 3: don't know. I think I started recognizing that I was

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Speaker 3: actually good at it and it wasn't just for fun.

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Speaker 3: Of course, I loved it, and I enjoyed playing in

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Speaker 3: the tournaments and club games and things like that and

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Speaker 3: going to train, but I also played basketball. I did

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Speaker 3: AU basketball, and I played club volleyball too, so it

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Speaker 3: wasn't my sole focus, but I knew that I was

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Speaker 3: probably better at that than the other sports. And Kyle, yeah,

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Speaker 3: he was interested in a lot of other things. He

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Speaker 3: was so creative too, and loved biology, and so his

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Speaker 3: interests kind of spanned in that way, and I stuck

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Speaker 3: with it, and I don't know, I think in high

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Speaker 3: school I recognized that maybe I was going to be

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Speaker 3: really good and he was getting nervous.

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Speaker 1: Rightfully, So, yeah, did you?

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Speaker 2: I mean, obviously you went to college to play, but

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Speaker 2: there wasn't a well established US league when you went

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Speaker 2: into college, I mean even when you left college, so like,

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Speaker 2: were you thinking about playing professionally or what did a

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Speaker 2: vision of a soccer life looked like for you?

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Speaker 3: So when I entered school. I think that was when

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Speaker 3: WUSA had just folded, maybe in two thousand and three. Unfortunately,

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Speaker 3: I was so looking forward to just having an experience

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Speaker 3: and possibly dreaming of playing professionally. At that time, I

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Speaker 3: was just worried about going to school, attending school and

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Speaker 3: being a student athlete and succeeding there. So I don't

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Speaker 3: know if my thoughts were, oh, I can actually make

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Speaker 3: this a thing, and this can be a job and

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Speaker 3: I can continue to play after school. I think I

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Speaker 3: was just focused on this four years really, and then

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Speaker 3: when I during Penn State, you know, at at school,

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Speaker 3: after getting recruited and accepting and going there, I then

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Speaker 3: realized quickly, okay, I'm you know, I need to catch

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Speaker 3: up because these these players are better than me.

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Speaker 1: They're faster. This is a different game, just the speed of.

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Speaker 3: Play, it was different, and so I had to really

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Speaker 3: adjust and figure out, you know, how to kind of

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Speaker 3: make my way into the team and really, I guess

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Speaker 3: separate myself and in a way that it was difficult

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Speaker 3: for the coaches to ignore me so that I would

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Speaker 3: play and that I would you know, be seen and

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Speaker 3: then get better. Ultimately, I always think though, when you

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Speaker 3: do you know, play with better players, and you put

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Speaker 3: yourself in situations where people are better than you, then

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Speaker 3: you obviously get better yourself.

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Speaker 1: And so that was kind of the situation for me.

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Speaker 3: So I was lucky that the players around me were

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Speaker 3: that good because it just made me better. And I

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Speaker 3: started to recognize after I guess getting you know, big

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Speaker 3: time Freshmen of the year, getting certain accolades, and us

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Speaker 3: winning as a team. You know, we won four Big

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Speaker 3: Ten championships, we got you know, we were number one,

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Speaker 3: ranked number one in the nation. My junior year, got

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Speaker 3: to you know, the Elite eight and the Final four,

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Speaker 3: so I knew that, you know, I was helping the

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Speaker 3: team be successful in a way. So I think at

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Speaker 3: that point I was hoping that we would have a

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Speaker 3: new league. I was a bit nervous going into my

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Speaker 3: junior senior year, like what now, what am I going

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Speaker 3: to do now? And what are the options for me? Luckily,

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Speaker 3: I made the U twenty three national team my senior year,

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Speaker 3: and I was a bit late. I was a late

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Speaker 3: bloomer actually with the national team, which was also fine

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Speaker 3: because I gained a lot of tools that I think

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Speaker 3: I needed during college in order to stay there. So

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Speaker 3: I was happy about that, but but I was definitely late.

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Speaker 3: And I was fortunate enough to kind of have that

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Speaker 3: outside of school because it kind of opened up the

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Speaker 3: next door, which was playing professionally overseas.

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Speaker 2: So what did players usually do at that point when

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Speaker 2: there was no US league? Because I mean the national team,

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Speaker 2: like the US women's soccer team has been well known

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Speaker 2: for a long time, and there was just no place

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Speaker 2: within the US for players to play.

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Speaker 1: Like, what did they usually do?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so either you would go overseas and play and

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Speaker 3: find a team and another league, or you would be

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Speaker 3: with the national team already, so you would be in

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Speaker 3: residency with the national team. And if you weren't in residency,

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Speaker 3: then you were kind of like, you know, just on

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Speaker 3: your own. You just had to go figure it out.

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Speaker 3: And I didn't want to just play pick up with

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Speaker 3: my guy friends or myigh school on Tuesdays and Thursday

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Speaker 3: evenings and hope.

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Speaker 1: To make it to the next level.

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Speaker 3: So I kind of took it upon myself to agree

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Speaker 3: to come try out for a couple of teams overseas.

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Speaker 3: And I had met an agent who was German American

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Speaker 3: and he actually was helping one of my dad's former players,

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Speaker 3: male players who was playing in the second Bundesliga over

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Speaker 3: in Germany, and I had a tournament in Finland, in

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Speaker 3: Busse of Finland. It was the right after I graduated,

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Speaker 3: and it was the summer right before, you know. I

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Speaker 3: kind of had to plan what was next, and luckily

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Speaker 3: European coaches saw me at the tournament and we actually

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Speaker 3: won the tournament against Germany in the final. And I

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Speaker 3: get a call from this German American Asian and you said, hey,

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Speaker 3: I have a couple teams that would love for you

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Speaker 3: to come play. There's one in Sweden, there's also two

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Speaker 3: in Germany. Would you be willing to come try out?

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Speaker 3: I said, well, yeah, I have nothing else.

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Speaker 1: To do, you know, and I have going on here

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Speaker 1: and nothing else.

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Speaker 3: Going on here, and I want to continue to make

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Speaker 3: it to the full national team, so that the only

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Speaker 3: way to do that is to put myself in a

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Speaker 3: position to get better one and to be seen. And

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Speaker 3: that was the decision I made. I just literally packed

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Speaker 3: two bags, I said bye to my family. I trusted

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Speaker 3: in Brian Eilert, who you know helped me overseas, and

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Speaker 3: so there today helping a lot of young players thrive

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Speaker 3: and get what they deserve. So I was lucky that

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Speaker 3: he hadn't been that phone call because I ended up

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Speaker 3: staying with him and his wife, Margaretta and their daughter Kimberly,

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Speaker 3: who I became just really close with, and they were

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Speaker 3: like my family there. So I was very lucky that

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Speaker 3: I landed, you know, within their family, and they helped

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Speaker 3: guide in me and I tried out for two weeks

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Speaker 3: at Frankfurt.

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Speaker 1: I show up and there's like, so you skipped your

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Speaker 1: college graduation, right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I just give my college graduation to go to

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Speaker 3: a camp. Well, I walked off the stage onto the airplane.

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Speaker 3: I literally said thank you very much.

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Speaker 1: Fun State.

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Speaker 3: My family ate actually dinner without me that night and

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Speaker 3: I left it.

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Speaker 1: They're like cheers to Ali. They're like, yeah, this is great,

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Speaker 1: you know, thanks for bringing us together, Allie. Yeah, and

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Speaker 1: I missed.

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Speaker 3: I missed all the fun, but but then it led

222
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:52,360
Speaker 3: me to my dream job.

223
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Speaker 1: So I was really grateful for that opportunity.

224
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Speaker 3: And I ended up playing on one of the best teams,

225
00:10:57,880 --> 00:11:00,800
Speaker 3: if not the best team at the time in the Bundeslig.

226
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Speaker 1: And I didn't even know. I wasn't even aware of

227
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:03,560
Speaker 1: that going over.

228
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:05,880
Speaker 3: I just agreed to just go play and have fun

229
00:11:05,679 --> 00:11:08,520
Speaker 3: and experience something new overseas.

230
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:11,800
Speaker 2: Germany is kind of a wild choice for somebody who

231
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Speaker 2: does not speak German.

232
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:17,959
Speaker 3: How difficult was that transition for you? It was very difficult.

233
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:21,040
Speaker 3: My family, you know, my dad's side of the family

234
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:25,079
Speaker 3: is German. The language obviously got lost within the family,

235
00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:27,319
Speaker 3: and my last.

236
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,960
Speaker 1: Name is German. It means warrior in German.

237
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:31,840
Speaker 3: So I figured it was like a safe space for

238
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Speaker 3: me to go. I felt comfortable in trying it out,

239
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:37,520
Speaker 3: and I knew that if it didn't work out and

240
00:11:37,559 --> 00:11:39,800
Speaker 3: I was that unhappy, I could always come back. I

241
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:42,839
Speaker 3: could always come home and you know, start over and

242
00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:44,240
Speaker 3: just figure out what would be next.

243
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Speaker 1: So I just took that risk. I took the chance.

244
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Speaker 3: It was very difficult, you know, learning a new culture,

245
00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:52,920
Speaker 3: new language, new way of life. It was a beautiful place,

246
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:56,680
Speaker 3: though the architecture is amazing. You have to have a

247
00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:59,800
Speaker 3: lot of thick skin because you know, Germans are very raw,

248
00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:04,000
Speaker 3: very honest, and they tell you the truth and you

249
00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:06,880
Speaker 3: have to be willing to you know, receive that. And

250
00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:09,440
Speaker 3: so that was difficult for me because even playing on

251
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,640
Speaker 3: the field, I'm used to having teammates.

252
00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:13,080
Speaker 1: Even if I kicked the ball out of bounds, You're like.

253
00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,400
Speaker 4: All right, Elli, next, try next, try right, But I

254
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:19,360
Speaker 4: would get yelled at is that you know, we're the

255
00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:22,840
Speaker 4: case and there wasn't any purpose in the past, and

256
00:12:22,840 --> 00:12:25,480
Speaker 4: and or maybe I shot it out for you know,

257
00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:27,640
Speaker 4: a throw in, they would just be like, what are

258
00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:28,040
Speaker 4: you doing?

259
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:29,439
Speaker 1: Like it's not good enough?

260
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:33,720
Speaker 3: And but ultimately, whether that hurt or not, it helped

261
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:34,440
Speaker 3: me in the long run.

262
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,840
Speaker 1: It helped me become better.

263
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:41,720
Speaker 3: And I grew to really receive criticism well as best

264
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:44,760
Speaker 3: I could and then try to apply just being better

265
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:47,120
Speaker 3: the next the next training session or the next game.

266
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Speaker 3: And so I was grateful for that, but it was

267
00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:51,360
Speaker 3: very difficult the first three months.

268
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:52,360
Speaker 1: I was I remember cry.

269
00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:54,880
Speaker 3: I cried after one training session and I was like,

270
00:12:54,920 --> 00:12:55,760
Speaker 3: what am I doing here?

271
00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:58,680
Speaker 1: This is like not for me. I'm not as happy

272
00:12:58,679 --> 00:12:59,199
Speaker 1: as I thought.

273
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Speaker 3: I don't know if I can do this the rest

274
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:02,839
Speaker 3: of I signed for two years, so I was like,

275
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:04,120
Speaker 3: I don't know if I could do this. I can

276
00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:06,120
Speaker 3: always go home, but I'd have to break the contract.

277
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:08,319
Speaker 3: But let me go home for Christmas, see the family,

278
00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:11,760
Speaker 3: and then I'll reevaluate for the spring part of the season.

279
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:12,480
Speaker 1: Well, I get.

280
00:13:12,679 --> 00:13:16,080
Speaker 3: I actually went home and I missed it immediately. I

281
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:19,760
Speaker 3: was like, I, actually I really really found that I

282
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,640
Speaker 3: loved it there, and I loved just the self discovery

283
00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:24,920
Speaker 3: that I was going through and like learning a new

284
00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,520
Speaker 3: perspective about life, but also just learning a lot about

285
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:33,480
Speaker 3: myself as a woman and a person and a footballer.

286
00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:35,920
Speaker 3: So that was a little bit of self discovery. I

287
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:39,320
Speaker 3: think that's what I was scared of. Maybe I was unveiling,

288
00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:43,280
Speaker 3: like and unlayering just myself and that I was like

289
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,640
Speaker 3: the vulnerability aspect of everything, I think is what maybe

290
00:13:46,679 --> 00:13:48,600
Speaker 3: I was. I had a fear of that and kind

291
00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:51,760
Speaker 3: of confronting that, and so after that was you know,

292
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:54,760
Speaker 3: I kind of went through that phase. I was more

293
00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:58,439
Speaker 3: open to going back into really continuing that journey.

294
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,079
Speaker 2: Do you think you ended up in this self discovery

295
00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,360
Speaker 2: because you were so alone?

296
00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:03,280
Speaker 1: It did?

297
00:14:03,440 --> 00:14:05,480
Speaker 3: It did, And I had to really sit with myself

298
00:14:05,559 --> 00:14:08,880
Speaker 3: and try not to feel lonely, right because I feel

299
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:11,640
Speaker 3: like when you're okay, that means you can really sit

300
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,480
Speaker 3: with yourself and not feel lonely. So I had to

301
00:14:13,559 --> 00:14:15,560
Speaker 3: kind of get to that point and do a little

302
00:14:15,559 --> 00:14:18,480
Speaker 3: bit of self discovery because I was leaving a four

303
00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:22,000
Speaker 3: year college, you know, friends and family. I was literally

304
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:27,440
Speaker 3: by myself and I was just unsure of the people,

305
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:31,840
Speaker 3: the culture, the food, the place. And I did have

306
00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:34,400
Speaker 3: help with you know, my agent at the time, Brian

307
00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:37,720
Speaker 3: and his lovely wife and daughter, which I felt like

308
00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:40,120
Speaker 3: they were then my family, so I kind of had

309
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:43,160
Speaker 3: that advantage. I felt really safe with them, and so

310
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:46,160
Speaker 3: I would go out and do things with them as

311
00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:48,840
Speaker 3: a family and go to dinners and they would introduce

312
00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:51,960
Speaker 3: me to new places in Germany, and just the idea

313
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:55,720
Speaker 3: of living in a new city was really comforting because

314
00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,080
Speaker 3: I knew that I knew that I had their support,

315
00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:00,120
Speaker 3: and so I think that was what was easy, and

316
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,160
Speaker 3: then I met a lot of friends. I took German

317
00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:04,600
Speaker 3: three times, three times a week, three hours a day

318
00:15:04,760 --> 00:15:06,960
Speaker 3: because we didn't train until four in the afternoon, because

319
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:09,200
Speaker 3: a lot of the players had to work, so they

320
00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:11,400
Speaker 3: had a normal job, and then they would come.

321
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:12,840
Speaker 1: To training in the evening.

322
00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:16,920
Speaker 3: One of the best and even national team players would

323
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:19,960
Speaker 3: have to go and work and then come to training,

324
00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:22,520
Speaker 3: so it was a full day and I would take

325
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:26,760
Speaker 3: that time to learn German with other classmates who were

326
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,360
Speaker 3: from all around the world, and our common language was German,

327
00:15:29,680 --> 00:15:32,000
Speaker 3: and so we were able to speak that in class,

328
00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:34,000
Speaker 3: and then I would speak it at training, and then

329
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:36,240
Speaker 3: I would go home and I would be like, I'm

330
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:40,960
Speaker 3: so tired, Like I mentally drained because all I've been

331
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:43,640
Speaker 3: hearing and listening to and speaking is German and it's

332
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,480
Speaker 3: just not, you know, my native tongue. And it was

333
00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:49,080
Speaker 3: difficult for me through that period, but I think I

334
00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:52,560
Speaker 3: had to sit with myself and really go through that

335
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:56,480
Speaker 3: vulnerability phase. And once I went through that, I was

336
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,960
Speaker 3: more comfortable and who I was becoming.

337
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:02,960
Speaker 1: And you had a long term boyfriend in college. Did

338
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,760
Speaker 1: that end because you left? Or it just sort of

339
00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:07,920
Speaker 1: ran its course? Like was that also part of the

340
00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:12,720
Speaker 1: loneliness there? Yeah, actually it ran its course.

341
00:16:13,080 --> 00:16:16,920
Speaker 3: But also I was wanting to go play overseas, but

342
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,320
Speaker 3: you know, we were leaving school and it was just

343
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:21,200
Speaker 3: kind of everything was just like up in the air,

344
00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:24,040
Speaker 3: and he was going to med school down a University

345
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:30,520
Speaker 3: of Florida, and I didn't want to follow and just

346
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:33,400
Speaker 3: you know, settle for that. I really wanted to pursue

347
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:37,480
Speaker 3: my dream and then I needed to do some self discovery.

348
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:39,080
Speaker 3: I had a lot to figure out at the time,

349
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:43,400
Speaker 3: especially you know, figuring out my sexuality and really, you

350
00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:45,680
Speaker 3: know who I wanted to be and who I really

351
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:50,000
Speaker 3: was deep down, and I was grateful that I had left,

352
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,520
Speaker 3: not that I was running from something, because I did

353
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:53,600
Speaker 3: sit and think about that.

354
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,480
Speaker 1: I said, what am I running from? This?

355
00:16:56,280 --> 00:16:59,320
Speaker 3: Is this why I'm here? Why am I choosing to

356
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,000
Speaker 3: do this? You know, my parents obviously went through a

357
00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:04,760
Speaker 3: divorce as well, and I didn't really have a lot

358
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:06,800
Speaker 3: at home at the time I was. I was kind

359
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:11,320
Speaker 3: of just figuring out life. And once I kind of

360
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,680
Speaker 3: landed in Europe and in Germany, I felt like it

361
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:17,120
Speaker 3: was my second home. I felt like this, this is right,

362
00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:19,080
Speaker 3: this is where I'm supposed to be because I'm supposed

363
00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:21,440
Speaker 3: to be forced to figure out who I really am.

364
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,560
Speaker 2: Do you think part of that was tied to exploring

365
00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:26,919
Speaker 2: your sexuality and sexual orientation? Like did you think that

366
00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:29,280
Speaker 2: like oh am, I as your self discovering, Like oh am,

367
00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:31,640
Speaker 2: I running to a whole new continent to be able

368
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:33,040
Speaker 2: to explore if I want to be dating women.

369
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:36,360
Speaker 3: Yes, And I think at the end of college, which

370
00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:39,200
Speaker 3: is why I think my ex and I during school

371
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:43,040
Speaker 3: had issues because I was doing a little self discovery

372
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:46,240
Speaker 3: there my sexuality and not really understanding why I felt

373
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:50,240
Speaker 3: a certain way towards, you know, women, but also just everyone.

374
00:17:50,560 --> 00:17:52,879
Speaker 1: I had this attraction towards women.

375
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,600
Speaker 3: And I wasn't really sure of why, because when growing up,

376
00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:59,439
Speaker 3: I never realized that two women could be together. My

377
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:01,080
Speaker 3: brother came out to me when he was a senior

378
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,080
Speaker 3: in high school, and so I had thought only men

379
00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:05,320
Speaker 3: could be together, which is so naive of me now

380
00:18:05,359 --> 00:18:08,120
Speaker 3: looking back, it's like, but that's how sad the visibility

381
00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:10,479
Speaker 3: was for our community back when I was, you know,

382
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:13,600
Speaker 3: in high school. It just wasn't you know, I just

383
00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:17,440
Speaker 3: wasn't aware, and it wasn't as in my face and

384
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:23,359
Speaker 3: invisible and relatable, and I felt confused. And so I

385
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:26,359
Speaker 3: think towards the end of school, understanding that oh maybe

386
00:18:26,359 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 3: some of my teammates were dating or other athletes within

387
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:32,640
Speaker 3: the university were dating of the same sex, I was like, oh,

388
00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:34,919
Speaker 3: this could be a thing, like this is this is

389
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 3: nice because I'm actually like, oh, okay. There was like

390
00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:41,159
Speaker 3: lights going off in my mind just huh, this is

391
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:43,000
Speaker 3: why I'm feeling the way I'm feeling, and this is

392
00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:47,359
Speaker 3: this is really exciting, And so yeah, that was a

393
00:18:47,359 --> 00:18:50,879
Speaker 3: bit attached to the part of self discovering and sexuality,

394
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:52,320
Speaker 3: and then I went to Germany. I felt like, oh,

395
00:18:52,560 --> 00:18:55,760
Speaker 3: I'm kind of free to be who I want to be.

396
00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,119
Speaker 3: And that time period, those five and a half years,

397
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,560
Speaker 3: was really a period of me figuring out.

398
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:05,719
Speaker 1: You know, my sexuality and really who I was as

399
00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:10,159
Speaker 1: a woman. When we come back, Ali talks about what

400
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,359
Speaker 1: it was like leaving behind the life she built in

401
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:22,000
Speaker 1: Germany and coming to play stateside. Now back to the show,

402
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,320
Speaker 1: So was it then hard to make the decision to

403
00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:29,520
Speaker 1: come play back in the US club to leave Germany.

404
00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:33,360
Speaker 3: It was I was somewhat forced to do that actually

405
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:37,360
Speaker 3: from US Soccer, to come back and to really help

406
00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:42,160
Speaker 3: the league survive. So unfortunately, I was told that I,

407
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,639
Speaker 3: you know, would lose my US Soccer contracts if I

408
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,480
Speaker 3: didn't come back to play in the NIBS. At the time,

409
00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:51,480
Speaker 3: and I was actually preparing with a few other American players,

410
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:55,480
Speaker 3: I was basically just on a short term loan and

411
00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,200
Speaker 3: I was in Sweden playing for Tater So we were

412
00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:04,480
Speaker 3: playing actually planning to go back in the January for preseason.

413
00:20:04,520 --> 00:20:06,280
Speaker 3: I went home in December and then I just ended

414
00:20:06,359 --> 00:20:09,119
Speaker 3: up never going back because I was somewhat forced to

415
00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:11,920
Speaker 3: stay in the NBA Sun, not that I didn't want

416
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:14,359
Speaker 3: to play, but because we were in Champions League and

417
00:20:14,359 --> 00:20:16,440
Speaker 3: we were doing very well. We were in the quarterfinals,

418
00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:19,480
Speaker 3: and then they, obviously without us, went to the semi

419
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:21,720
Speaker 3: finals and then the final, and they ended up losing

420
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:24,639
Speaker 3: in the final, but last minute they had to find

421
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:27,879
Speaker 3: players to replace a few of us, And it was

422
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:34,000
Speaker 3: unfortunate because I wanted to play and finish out what

423
00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:36,160
Speaker 3: I had started with that team, and it was probably

424
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:38,240
Speaker 3: one of the best teams I've ever played on and

425
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 3: just football wise, like the talent was amazing, and I

426
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:46,199
Speaker 3: was really sad that I had to kind of choose

427
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:49,280
Speaker 3: between Champions League, you know, finishing out and I would

428
00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:52,280
Speaker 3: have come in May, but the season and the preseason

429
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:54,720
Speaker 3: I think had started at that time in March, and

430
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,639
Speaker 3: so it just wasn't a possibility. And I wasn't willing

431
00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:00,840
Speaker 3: to give up my national team contract and kind of

432
00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:03,960
Speaker 3: go through that and lose out on that. I was

433
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:07,480
Speaker 3: really scared to do that. So, yes, there was an ending,

434
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:10,679
Speaker 3: and it was unfortunate, but also a brilliant beginning to

435
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 3: the league and to really be a part of that

436
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,600
Speaker 3: and one of the ones who helped start the league

437
00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:16,880
Speaker 3: in the United States is pretty incredible too.

438
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:19,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think people realize that the league has

439
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,520
Speaker 2: kind of gone for fluctuation, like it hasn't always existed.

440
00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:25,280
Speaker 2: The national team did maintain and you were a part

441
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:27,560
Speaker 2: of it, so that really had been kind of the

442
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,080
Speaker 2: goal for you. I mean, can you talk about like

443
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:32,200
Speaker 2: when you first got to national team camp that got

444
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:33,440
Speaker 2: called up to the national team.

445
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:38,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was actually playing in Germany and Pias Sundaga

446
00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:41,160
Speaker 3: at the time was just signing on as the new

447
00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:48,480
Speaker 3: US women's national team coach after Greg Ryan left and.

448
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:47,159
Speaker 1: She comes in.

449
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:49,760
Speaker 3: My agent actually had written her and said, hey, there's

450
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:52,439
Speaker 3: also an American player playing for f FC Frankfurt and

451
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:55,440
Speaker 3: they're playing Potsdam this weekend if you want to come

452
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:59,120
Speaker 3: and check it out, because you know, Lara Biermai is,

453
00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:01,600
Speaker 3: you know, playing on Potsdam and it's you know, one

454
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:04,159
Speaker 3: of the best German national team forwards to ever play

455
00:22:04,520 --> 00:22:07,080
Speaker 3: on the on the team and within the Bundesliga, I

456
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:10,600
Speaker 3: mean even in the world. And I was defending at

457
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:14,120
Speaker 3: the time still at right back, and I was going

458
00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:16,879
Speaker 3: up against her basically one v one, and so I

459
00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:19,800
Speaker 3: think Pio wanted to come see how good I was

460
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:22,000
Speaker 3: because that was going to be a great test. So

461
00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:25,320
Speaker 3: she comes to the game and I actually ended up

462
00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:29,560
Speaker 3: playing really well fortunately, and she saw the game and

463
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:33,040
Speaker 3: was very impressed and knew that playing against Lera Bairom

464
00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:36,200
Speaker 3: I wasn't an easy feet and so I was lucky that,

465
00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 3: you know, it just kind of played out the way

466
00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:41,360
Speaker 3: that it was it was supposed to. And she invited

467
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:44,080
Speaker 3: me into that January camp because this was towards the

468
00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:46,560
Speaker 3: end of the fall season, and she invited me into

469
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:49,479
Speaker 3: that camp and it was actually the I think it

470
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:54,159
Speaker 3: was two thousand and eight or yeah, it was like

471
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:56,639
Speaker 3: end of two thousand and eight because we were prepping.

472
00:22:56,640 --> 00:22:59,080
Speaker 3: They were prepping for the Olympics, so I knew it

473
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:02,240
Speaker 3: was be a tough job joining halfway through the last

474
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:05,439
Speaker 3: you know, few months prepping for the Olympics. So I

475
00:23:05,440 --> 00:23:07,880
Speaker 3: don't know if I was really going to be able

476
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,320
Speaker 3: to make that squad, but I ended up going to

477
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:13,440
Speaker 3: China with the team and making it because Heather MIT's

478
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:15,000
Speaker 3: at the time, I think, was injured and so that

479
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 3: was kind of like my way in and I think I,

480
00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 3: you know, did well enough to impress the coaches and

481
00:23:21,119 --> 00:23:23,359
Speaker 3: so I was able to kind of keep myself in

482
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:25,920
Speaker 3: the back of her mind for future camps. I unfortunately

483
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,080
Speaker 3: got injured in two thousand and nine, so I didn't

484
00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:30,440
Speaker 3: make it back to the team and they didn't take

485
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,760
Speaker 3: me to the Olympics. I was an alternate, but that

486
00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:34,879
Speaker 3: was okay because that was just an achievement all in

487
00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:38,120
Speaker 3: itself that I was. I was possibly in the squad.

488
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,200
Speaker 3: So then I got injured in two thousand and nine,

489
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,359
Speaker 3: and then I got, you know, called back up in

490
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 3: twenty ten, and then obviously that was in preparation for

491
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,600
Speaker 3: a World Cup twenty eleven.

492
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:52,359
Speaker 2: I can only imagine the feeling of walking onto a

493
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:55,919
Speaker 2: field to represent your entire country, being the best in

494
00:23:55,960 --> 00:23:59,919
Speaker 2: the entire nation, being the best in the entire world,

495
00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:03,760
Speaker 2: having competed in the World Cup and the Olympics. At

496
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,160
Speaker 2: least is going to tell us all about it right

497
00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:07,040
Speaker 2: after the break.

498
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:14,119
Speaker 1: Now back to the show.

499
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 2: Give us a little insight into what that feels like

500
00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:21,879
Speaker 2: to be a player going in to represent your country.

501
00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:24,760
Speaker 3: It's an incredible feeling because it's something you work for

502
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:26,639
Speaker 3: your entire life and there's only a certain amount of

503
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:29,679
Speaker 3: players who get to do that, and out of you know,

504
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:32,120
Speaker 3: for World Cup, it's twenty three players, but for Olympics

505
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:35,960
Speaker 3: it's eighteen, and you think. You sit there after you're

506
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,879
Speaker 3: chosen and you're like, wow, I am one of the

507
00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:43,600
Speaker 3: best eighteen players in the entire country. You know, if

508
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:48,119
Speaker 3: there's so many people interviewing for one position, Yeah, we

509
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:50,679
Speaker 3: have eleven on the field, but you know, you have

510
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:53,359
Speaker 3: eighteen positions because I think game changes are also some

511
00:24:53,400 --> 00:24:56,479
Speaker 3: of the most important players a team can have. You

512
00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:59,680
Speaker 3: have eighteen, you know, spots that you can possibly make

513
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:03,600
Speaker 3: and make one of those. And there's thousands of players

514
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:07,360
Speaker 3: trying to make this team, hundreds of thousands, I should say,

515
00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:10,960
Speaker 3: in the country playing soccer, and you're one of them,

516
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:14,120
Speaker 3: and you've worked your entire life, and you just kind

517
00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:16,399
Speaker 3: of your whole path kind of starts to go in

518
00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:18,159
Speaker 3: your mind. Right, I start to think of like, my

519
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 3: whole entire path that has has gotten me to that point,

520
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,199
Speaker 3: and it's pretty incredible to sit there and think, this

521
00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:27,400
Speaker 3: is what I dreamt of when I was eleven years

522
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:30,000
Speaker 3: old watching the US national team play in the Women's

523
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 3: World Cup in ninety nine and wanting to be that

524
00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:35,760
Speaker 3: and looking at you know, those those players and my

525
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,879
Speaker 3: idols and heroes, you know, performing and playing the sport

526
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,919
Speaker 3: that I absolutely love and I'm so passionate about to now,

527
00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:45,800
Speaker 3: you know, I guess I should say eleven twelve years

528
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:50,600
Speaker 3: later being called in to perform for my country and

529
00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 3: to fight for gold medal. That's just you can't really

530
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,399
Speaker 3: put it into words, like the type of feeling that

531
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:01,159
Speaker 3: is just so rewarding because you put on that jersey

532
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:03,360
Speaker 3: and you're not only representing yourself or your family or friends,

533
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 3: You're representing our entire country and people who are loving

534
00:26:07,040 --> 00:26:09,040
Speaker 3: the sport just as much as we are, and that

535
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,440
Speaker 3: just gives you that much more motivation. So you feel

536
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:15,800
Speaker 3: a little pressure obviously, but you trust yourself enough that

537
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:18,000
Speaker 3: you know that you're good enough to be there.

538
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:21,200
Speaker 1: So all of that, you know, journey along the way.

539
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:24,119
Speaker 3: Has really prepared you for this to be on this

540
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 3: team in this moment, And so I can't really put

541
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:28,640
Speaker 3: it into words and articulate it the way that I'm

542
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:33,960
Speaker 3: feeling about it, But it is just an exciting, rewarding

543
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:36,480
Speaker 3: feeling when you just put on that jersey and you.

544
00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:38,399
Speaker 1: Walk out with your head hot high, you're ready to

545
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:42,439
Speaker 1: fight and win. I get chills hearing you talk about it.

546
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,480
Speaker 2: What surprised you about going to I guess both the

547
00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,600
Speaker 2: Olympics and the World Cup.

548
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:51,919
Speaker 3: I think the team camaraderie all of a sudden with

549
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:54,800
Speaker 3: a national team, it's a bloodbath camp in and camp out.

550
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:59,520
Speaker 3: Every camp you are fighting, clawing and scratching each other

551
00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:02,199
Speaker 3: to get onto this team and make the squad. And

552
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:03,680
Speaker 3: at the time I was on the team, we were

553
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:06,639
Speaker 3: fighting for contracts. So every January would come around and

554
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 3: there's only twenty six maybe contracts that are given out,

555
00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 3: and there's different tiers, and so you had to really

556
00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:18,800
Speaker 3: prove yourself and you there wasn't a moment you could

557
00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:22,280
Speaker 3: take a breath. You have to perform your best every

558
00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:25,159
Speaker 3: single day, even at a meal. You have to be

559
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:27,800
Speaker 3: on time. You have to look your best. You have to,

560
00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:30,800
Speaker 3: you know, the way you present yourself day in and

561
00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:34,159
Speaker 3: day out really matters. And it's you know, it's exhausting

562
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 3: at the end of it, but it's once you make

563
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 3: the team and you fight every day, it's so worth it.

564
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:44,240
Speaker 3: And what surprised me was the team camaraderie. All of

565
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:47,600
Speaker 3: a sudden, Once you make the team, you come together

566
00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 3: and you are supporting each other until the very ends,

567
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:53,720
Speaker 3: like you are fighting for each other on the field,

568
00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:57,520
Speaker 3: it's no longer against each other. It's now we are it.

569
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,560
Speaker 3: This is we need each other to survive, and we

570
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 3: need each other to win, and we need each other

571
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:04,960
Speaker 3: to make you know, make each other look good.

572
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:08,040
Speaker 1: And this is it. This is who we.

573
00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:10,360
Speaker 3: Have in this room and in this group is how

574
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 3: we're going to win the goal medal. And so you

575
00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:14,879
Speaker 3: start to confide in each other, not that you didn't before,

576
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:17,880
Speaker 3: but in a different way. It's just a bond that

577
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,640
Speaker 3: you know, you can't really describe unless you're physically there

578
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,200
Speaker 3: and you've been there to understand it. But you come

579
00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:27,879
Speaker 3: together as a group, whereas just you're in this bubble.

580
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,160
Speaker 3: Your main focus and your main goal is to win

581
00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:32,919
Speaker 3: and succeed, and how can you help each other do that?

582
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:35,000
Speaker 3: And how can you help each other look your best

583
00:28:35,040 --> 00:28:37,879
Speaker 3: and perform your best and be successful together so that

584
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:39,680
Speaker 3: at the end of the day we can come home

585
00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 3: and bring this trophy.

586
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, a couple of years into being on the national team,

587
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 2: you guys kind of broke up, like they just stopped

588
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:51,520
Speaker 2: calling m How can I mean, can you give a

589
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 2: little more contact with that? But also how confusing must

590
00:28:54,320 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 2: that have felt for you? Yeah, it was It was

591
00:28:57,040 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 2: kind of like.

592
00:28:57,400 --> 00:29:00,760
Speaker 3: A relationship where you don't have clothes and you break

593
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:02,840
Speaker 3: up and then you just don't know the reason why.

594
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,160
Speaker 3: And I know that's uncomfortable for anyone, because I'm the

595
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 3: type of person that's like, okay, give me, give me

596
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 3: a reason, and I'm ready to work at it, and

597
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:12,040
Speaker 3: I'm ready to be better.

598
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:13,360
Speaker 1: If it works, great, if.

599
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:15,080
Speaker 3: It doesn't, great, at least I'm going to continue to

600
00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 3: work on myself and in order to hopefully have the

601
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:22,680
Speaker 3: next relationship be more successful. But I never received that information.

602
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:26,040
Speaker 3: It was just in twenty seventeen, was my last camp,

603
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:29,640
Speaker 3: and I just got a call that said, hey, we're

604
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,200
Speaker 3: wanting to, you know, call in a lot of you know,

605
00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 3: younger players and give them an opportunity and that's just

606
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:39,800
Speaker 3: kind of what we're going to do. And that was it,

607
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:45,320
Speaker 3: and I said okay. And this was after basically winning

608
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 3: a World Cup, holding you know, teams from scoring a goal.

609
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 3: I started every game and played almost every minute or

610
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:57,560
Speaker 3: if not every minute, and we held a team for

611
00:29:57,640 --> 00:29:59,840
Speaker 3: like five hundred and some minutes, you know, from s

612
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:01,960
Speaker 3: or in a goal. And then you go to Olympics

613
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:04,720
Speaker 3: and then they change the entire like back line and

614
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:09,120
Speaker 3: a just personnel only a year later, which I'm still

615
00:30:09,120 --> 00:30:12,400
Speaker 3: pretty confused about because we lost and I was really

616
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 3: upset about that, and then you know, getting fired in

617
00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:18,960
Speaker 3: twenty seventeen. It just really wasn't sure why. I was

618
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:20,560
Speaker 3: never given the reasons, so then I had to go

619
00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 3: back to the drawing board without really any information. So

620
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,760
Speaker 3: I would ask a lot of other coaches around, hey,

621
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:27,400
Speaker 3: what do you see in my game that I can

622
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 3: improve on? Because I want to get back to the

623
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 3: national team. I want to make it very difficult for

624
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:34,000
Speaker 3: them to ignore me, Like I see that I'm still

625
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 3: useful there. I see that I can help the team.

626
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:38,680
Speaker 3: I see that I'm still one of the best defenders

627
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:40,960
Speaker 3: in the country and in the world. And I wasn't

628
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 3: afraid to say that because I knew that at the

629
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 3: time that I was just really confused, and so I

630
00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:47,760
Speaker 3: kind of took.

631
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,120
Speaker 1: Whatever other coaches said I should work on.

632
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:57,440
Speaker 3: And I worked even harder individually, and I told myself,

633
00:30:57,520 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 3: I'm going to be the alley kreaker, no matter what,

634
00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:01,800
Speaker 3: whether that's on the national team, we're playing for club,

635
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 3: I'm going to be the same player. So you're going

636
00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:05,720
Speaker 3: to know what is expected of me and what you're

637
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 3: going to get and the consistency and that confidence is

638
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:11,280
Speaker 3: always going to be there the leadership, no matter if

639
00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:13,360
Speaker 3: I'm on the national team or not. That wasn't, you know,

640
00:31:13,400 --> 00:31:15,840
Speaker 3: really going to affect me that much and affect my game.

641
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 3: I was only going to get better because it was

642
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 3: going to inspire me to want to fight and compete

643
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,600
Speaker 3: and be driven even more and more motivated to want

644
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,680
Speaker 3: to get back. And so I use that as a

645
00:31:24,720 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 3: tool to really invest in myself and fight to really

646
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 3: make it difficult for them not to call me in.

647
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:34,880
Speaker 3: By twenty nineteen World Cup, I said, this is what

648
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:36,400
Speaker 3: I'm going to do. This is how I'm going to

649
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:39,120
Speaker 3: do it. I had the resources, and so I just

650
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:42,280
Speaker 3: needed to have the motivation to want it for myself.

651
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,360
Speaker 1: That's such a big mindset shift.

652
00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:48,280
Speaker 2: And you did it on like literally a national and

653
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:51,480
Speaker 2: international stage and in the public people could see whether

654
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:52,840
Speaker 2: you were on the team or not. But I think

655
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 2: applies to a lot of people when they're thinking about

656
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:57,000
Speaker 2: changes in their careers.

657
00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 1: And I think a lot about how we change the

658
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:00,000
Speaker 1: metric of success.

659
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 2: Yes, especially if the thing that we're going for is

660
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:06,120
Speaker 2: external to us, like if it's unavailable, then we can't

661
00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:08,920
Speaker 2: have that as our metric of success anymore as someone

662
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 2: else is controlling it. That was very much the case

663
00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:13,800
Speaker 2: for you. So how did you change your thinking at

664
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 2: that time? Like what kind of narratives were you telling

665
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:17,600
Speaker 2: yourself about what your metric for success was.

666
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 1: Then I wanted to win the nd Besel.

667
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:24,160
Speaker 3: I wanted to continue to get better and perform well

668
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:26,800
Speaker 3: for my team to be successful. So I knew individually

669
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:30,160
Speaker 3: I had to lead by example and you know, help

670
00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:31,920
Speaker 3: the younger players, because I knew if I helped the

671
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:34,440
Speaker 3: younger players, and it's going to help me win. So

672
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 3: I knew that I had that responsibility as well, and

673
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:41,400
Speaker 3: I enjoyed that I took that on because I know

674
00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:44,240
Speaker 3: how good I can be, and I was willing to

675
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:46,160
Speaker 3: kind of tidy up all the little details that I

676
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 3: needed to that I assumed, you know, might not have

677
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,120
Speaker 3: been good enough to be on the national team anymore.

678
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:53,680
Speaker 3: That I went back to the drawing board and I

679
00:32:53,720 --> 00:32:56,760
Speaker 3: worked my butt off every day and shout out to

680
00:32:57,320 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 3: some coaches at home with Orlando, one being sub Hines

681
00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 3: who really helped me individually perfect my game as a defender,

682
00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 3: and he used to play on the men's team there.

683
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 3: Now he obviously coaches Orlando and they're very successful at

684
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:14,800
Speaker 3: the moment, but he would come out with me multiple

685
00:33:14,880 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 3: times a week just to train, mean more specifically in

686
00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 3: the off season, to really get me to where I

687
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:25,040
Speaker 3: wanted to be. And so I know, I credit some

688
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 3: of my coaches there, and obviously the coaches who were

689
00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:32,120
Speaker 3: coaching Orlando at the time, Tom Cermani and then Mark Skinner,

690
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 3: who really helped me get back to where I wanted

691
00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,760
Speaker 3: to be in order to be seen and perform well.

692
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 3: So then I eventually did get the call, and Joe

693
00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:45,040
Speaker 3: called me during preseason I think in twenty nineteen, and

694
00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:47,720
Speaker 3: it was only a few months before the World Cup,

695
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:52,120
Speaker 3: where I knew it was probably very difficult for them

696
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 3: to call me back because originally she was the one

697
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:58,920
Speaker 3: who had let me go. And I was just somewhat

698
00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 3: waiting for that call, to be honest, because I knew

699
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 3: that I could help the team, and I knew that

700
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:07,840
Speaker 3: I was in a position to play well and to

701
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:12,319
Speaker 3: be there, and I knew how good I was at

702
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:15,200
Speaker 3: the time, and there was no question in my mind

703
00:34:15,239 --> 00:34:18,080
Speaker 3: that I might, you know, have another.

704
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: Opportunity at some point.

705
00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,640
Speaker 3: I wasn't sure when, and then two months before the

706
00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:24,480
Speaker 3: World Cup, I get called, and then me thinking why

707
00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 3: would they ever call me back if they're not really

708
00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:28,439
Speaker 3: going to put me back on the team and take

709
00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 3: me with them.

710
00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 1: That would look stupid on their part. And I was.

711
00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:36,400
Speaker 3: Very excited when I got the call. I had originally said, listen,

712
00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:39,520
Speaker 3: I'm just focused on continuing to get better every day

713
00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:42,680
Speaker 3: and to perform well, and whatever you need me to do,

714
00:34:43,080 --> 00:34:46,800
Speaker 3: I'm willing to do. I don't want to rehash the past.

715
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:50,680
Speaker 3: I'm in a new space mentally, physically, emotionally, and I'm

716
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:53,120
Speaker 3: ready to just do what's asked to me and what

717
00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:56,600
Speaker 3: you need me to apply individually and then for the team.

718
00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:58,839
Speaker 3: So let me know what that is. And I am

719
00:34:58,920 --> 00:34:59,279
Speaker 3: all in.

720
00:34:59,719 --> 00:35:03,479
Speaker 2: That's so healthy, Like I feel like I would really

721
00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 2: hold a much longer grudge, Like how did you get

722
00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:06,360
Speaker 2: to that place?

723
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:07,439
Speaker 1: Secretly I did?

724
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:10,960
Speaker 3: Secretly I did, but you know, I knew that it

725
00:35:11,000 --> 00:35:12,840
Speaker 3: had a lot to do with me and very little

726
00:35:12,880 --> 00:35:16,440
Speaker 3: to do with anyone else in the way that I

727
00:35:16,520 --> 00:35:19,640
Speaker 3: felt like, I feel like forgiveness is more so for

728
00:35:19,719 --> 00:35:22,759
Speaker 3: you than for the other person, and so I kind

729
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:26,160
Speaker 3: of carried that with me. You know, being upset and

730
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:29,960
Speaker 3: holding a grudge at that specific time wasn't really going

731
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:30,640
Speaker 3: to help me be.

732
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:32,520
Speaker 1: Successful and help the team.

733
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 3: So I knew I had to kind of table that

734
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:36,960
Speaker 3: and then I can maybe come back to that at

735
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,560
Speaker 3: a later time. I think through therapy, I touch on

736
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:43,920
Speaker 3: it here and there, which has helped me be successful

737
00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:48,080
Speaker 3: since then. And you know, I've gained tools to really

738
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:52,000
Speaker 3: help apply in those work workplaces, which is more specifically

739
00:35:52,040 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 3: on field, you know, with sports psychology, to really help

740
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:57,880
Speaker 3: me stay focused in the moment and the task at hand.

741
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,520
Speaker 1: And I think I'm really good at compartmental life.

742
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:04,040
Speaker 3: And so I you know, might rehash this out, you know,

743
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:07,640
Speaker 3: at a later date, but for right now and then

744
00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:10,680
Speaker 3: it worked and it helped me and I just focused

745
00:36:10,719 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 3: on you know, World Cup.

746
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:15,239
Speaker 2: So at this time, you've now been in a relationship

747
00:36:15,280 --> 00:36:18,360
Speaker 2: for some time, but you didn't disclose it publicly for

748
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:23,319
Speaker 2: a while, right, What was that decision? Why why not

749
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:25,839
Speaker 2: talk about it and then why switch to be more

750
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 2: public about it?

751
00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:31,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, we both actually were, you know, we met on

752
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 3: the national team and we became quickly became best friends.

753
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 3: And I was still playing in Germany, and so it's

754
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:42,560
Speaker 3: basically like a year of just staying in touch, maybe

755
00:36:42,600 --> 00:36:45,520
Speaker 3: even like seven eight months to a year staying in

756
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:48,400
Speaker 3: touch until I really you know, felt like an emotional

757
00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:53,360
Speaker 3: connection turned physical. And I was grateful for that friendship

758
00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,000
Speaker 3: because it was also nice forming that in the space

759
00:36:56,040 --> 00:37:02,040
Speaker 3: where I was really daunting emotionally, physically and mentally, that

760
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:05,439
Speaker 3: you you know, can have really great people to lean

761
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:08,319
Speaker 3: on because you need each other in those environments. And so,

762
00:37:08,920 --> 00:37:13,240
Speaker 3: you know, I formed that bond and that turned into

763
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:17,600
Speaker 3: a really beautiful friendship and a foundation to you know,

764
00:37:17,880 --> 00:37:21,480
Speaker 3: have a successful relationship. So moving on into you know,

765
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:24,480
Speaker 3: just national team stuff, I was I was afraid of

766
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:27,839
Speaker 3: losing our job. I was afraid that if we had

767
00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:30,440
Speaker 3: come out and you know, said that we had a

768
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:35,080
Speaker 3: relationship within the workplace, that we would be cut because

769
00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:40,359
Speaker 3: I was cut before from just absolutely no idea that

770
00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:43,640
Speaker 3: I'm sure that if there was actually a reason that

771
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 3: you know, maybe this could be a part two, you know,

772
00:37:48,000 --> 00:37:51,680
Speaker 3: and so I wasn't willing to sacrifice that. So, you know,

773
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:55,000
Speaker 3: and it's such a difficult environment in the sense that

774
00:37:55,120 --> 00:37:57,479
Speaker 3: you have to really focus on being your best and

775
00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,480
Speaker 3: no other distractions really can kind of you've been or

776
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:02,480
Speaker 3: else you're not going to perform well and then ultimately

777
00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 3: not make the team. And so a lot of people

778
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:08,799
Speaker 3: don't understand the amount of stress and anxiety that you know,

779
00:38:08,800 --> 00:38:12,760
Speaker 3: this environment creates for us as athletes, and it's almost

780
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:17,480
Speaker 3: to an unhealthy level. And you kind of start thinking

781
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:20,120
Speaker 3: about it once you're outside of it, more so than when.

782
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:20,400
Speaker 1: You're in it.

783
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,840
Speaker 3: You don't really realize it, but when you step outside

784
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 3: of it. So in the moment, I thought, we can't

785
00:38:25,520 --> 00:38:28,319
Speaker 3: say anything because I'm afraid we're gonna lose our job.

786
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:29,920
Speaker 3: And this is our livelihood, this is the way we

787
00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:32,120
Speaker 3: make money, this is what's keeping a roof over our head,

788
00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 3: this is you know, what we love to do. This

789
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:36,200
Speaker 3: is our passion, this is this is fun for us.

790
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:38,319
Speaker 3: So I don't want to ruin that. And this has

791
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,520
Speaker 3: been a dream of ours to win World Cups and

792
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 3: Championships and Olympics, So why chance that? And so ultimately

793
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 3: that was that was the reason, I think, because after

794
00:38:48,480 --> 00:38:51,640
Speaker 3: getting cut or fired from the team, I was like,

795
00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:54,520
Speaker 3: screw this, like I don't have anything else, Like if

796
00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:57,600
Speaker 3: they don't, it's basically their loss, right, Like you know,

797
00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:00,399
Speaker 3: they need me more than I need them, to point,

798
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:02,760
Speaker 3: and I got to that point in my mind where

799
00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 3: I kind of take that on with me now everywhere

800
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 3: I go, and I think that that was kind of

801
00:39:08,080 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 3: a mind shift for me. So after experiencing what I

802
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:14,160
Speaker 3: experienced in twenty seventeen eighteen those two years, and I

803
00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:17,480
Speaker 3: did lose a lot of money actually too, which I

804
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:20,160
Speaker 3: you know, have had a hard time kind of you know,

805
00:39:20,200 --> 00:39:24,040
Speaker 3: getting past. But I then started to think that way

806
00:39:24,080 --> 00:39:26,319
Speaker 3: in my mindset kind of shifted a little bit. And

807
00:39:26,400 --> 00:39:28,879
Speaker 3: at that point, I was more so wanting to live

808
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:33,520
Speaker 3: my authentic truth and live organically and live out you know,

809
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:38,400
Speaker 3: my relationship and my engagement, and because I was proud

810
00:39:38,400 --> 00:39:40,960
Speaker 3: of it. I was really proud to be, you know,

811
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:45,160
Speaker 3: with my partner at the time and be in that relationship,

812
00:39:45,160 --> 00:39:47,240
Speaker 3: and so I didn't It's not that we were hiding,

813
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:50,359
Speaker 3: because our friends and family always knew, and our teammates knew,

814
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:51,640
Speaker 3: and the staff knew.

815
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:54,840
Speaker 1: But it was just maybe saying it out loud.

816
00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 3: Even the fans and supporters knew, and even saying it

817
00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:01,360
Speaker 3: out loud, and the amount of support after that was incredible.

818
00:40:01,719 --> 00:40:05,080
Speaker 3: It was super positive, which is not something that I expected.

819
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:07,800
Speaker 2: Did you always know that you wanted to have kids

820
00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:10,240
Speaker 2: or did it lead to that moment You're like, okay,

821
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:11,440
Speaker 2: all right, we can do this.

822
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:14,440
Speaker 3: Yeah. Kids. I always wanted to have kids, so we

823
00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:16,960
Speaker 3: always wanted to have kids. I think that was just

824
00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:19,399
Speaker 3: the next step. But I wanted to continue to play,

825
00:40:19,440 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 3: and I was already past you know, thirty thirty two,

826
00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:25,200
Speaker 3: thirty three, I mean thirty four was World Cup twenty

827
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:27,399
Speaker 3: nineteen for me, and I knew that if I were

828
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:29,960
Speaker 3: to get pregnant, which was also the plan that was

829
00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 3: in the plan, I wouldn't be able to come back.

830
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:35,399
Speaker 3: I don't think you never know, Yeah, but I wasn't

831
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:37,520
Speaker 3: willing to chance it because I was actually performing really

832
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 3: well and having a really a good time playing club

833
00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:44,000
Speaker 3: and I love club soccer, so I you know, I'm

834
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:47,640
Speaker 3: very loyal to club. I always have been since Germany

835
00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 3: days and since you know, graduating from pun State. It

836
00:40:50,280 --> 00:40:52,800
Speaker 3: was just like so rewarding for me in different ways.

837
00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 3: But besides that, I knew I wasn't really going to

838
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:58,120
Speaker 3: be able to come back and maybe perform at the

839
00:40:58,120 --> 00:40:58,640
Speaker 3: same level.

840
00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:01,040
Speaker 1: So I was a little hesitant getting pregnant at the time.

841
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:03,719
Speaker 3: So then the decision was, hey, then let's put our

842
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:06,000
Speaker 3: name in for adoption because we had heard it might

843
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:08,800
Speaker 3: take two three years to adopt a child, so let's.

844
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:09,480
Speaker 1: Just put our name in now.

845
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 3: And that was kind of around when COVID hit and

846
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:13,680
Speaker 3: then Olympics got pushed a whole another year because I

847
00:41:13,719 --> 00:41:15,440
Speaker 3: think we both would have went to the Olympics that

848
00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:20,520
Speaker 3: year because we had just finished actually the Olympic qualifying tournament.

849
00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 3: And then it was that March that I think things

850
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,279
Speaker 3: kind of folded with the league and you know, was

851
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:28,319
Speaker 3: everything was kind of put on hold, and so we decided, then, hey,

852
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:31,120
Speaker 3: maybe let's it's time, like maybe the universe is telling

853
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:33,759
Speaker 3: us to put our name in for to you know,

854
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 3: to adopt a child. And so we did, and it

855
00:41:36,640 --> 00:41:38,680
Speaker 3: actually came a lot quicker than we expected.

856
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:41,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, it did. It came like that.

857
00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:44,720
Speaker 3: Next you know, obviously Sloan was born that next year

858
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 3: in February.

859
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:48,080
Speaker 1: But you know, this was in like, you know, the summer.

860
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,720
Speaker 3: May June, and they I had assumed maybe it would

861
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:54,799
Speaker 3: be a year or two at least. I No, there

862
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:58,040
Speaker 3: was there was Sloan ready to be adopted, ready to go,

863
00:41:58,280 --> 00:42:00,320
Speaker 3: ready to go, and a birth mom, you know, willing

864
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 3: to choose out of however many families, and so we

865
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:05,440
Speaker 3: had put our name in and then luckily, yeah we

866
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:06,120
Speaker 3: got chosen.

867
00:42:06,560 --> 00:42:08,400
Speaker 2: But how did you maintain you know, this is going

868
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,680
Speaker 2: to end up being one of the big topics. I

869
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 2: think that's like the next topic of discussion, you know,

870
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:15,799
Speaker 2: now that we're in our women's sports era, like as

871
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:16,800
Speaker 2: a country.

872
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:18,759
Speaker 1: But also how do we keep players in the game.

873
00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:22,520
Speaker 2: How do we support athletes while they're deciding whether they

874
00:42:22,680 --> 00:42:24,200
Speaker 2: carry kids adopt kids.

875
00:42:24,719 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 3: I think just within the workplace, you know, and specifically

876
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:32,760
Speaker 3: for me, within the organization and the federation, just having

877
00:42:33,120 --> 00:42:37,080
Speaker 3: resources and accommodations that really cater to moms and moms

878
00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:39,520
Speaker 3: who also adopt children, not just moms who give birth.

879
00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 3: And I think that we've done a decent job in

880
00:42:42,239 --> 00:42:45,200
Speaker 3: our CBA. There's obviously, you know, more things now as

881
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 3: you kind of go through it that you see, oh,

882
00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:49,000
Speaker 3: we need to add that next time, or we should

883
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 3: add this next time. But I do think the clubs

884
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:55,760
Speaker 3: now do have the resources and they're willing to invest

885
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:59,080
Speaker 3: in players who want to be moms and cater to

886
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:02,000
Speaker 3: moms with kids, and I think that it's getting much

887
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:03,360
Speaker 3: better and a little bit easier.

888
00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:07,040
Speaker 1: The support, I think the money for help, you.

889
00:43:07,000 --> 00:43:10,520
Speaker 3: Know, having nanny's or a pairs or just you know,

890
00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:14,120
Speaker 3: a place where you can take your child to I

891
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 3: guess a daycare type of situation during training if you

892
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 3: are homeschooling or whatever that may be, so that you

893
00:43:21,160 --> 00:43:23,279
Speaker 3: do have time to go, or you have a you know,

894
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,359
Speaker 3: a babysitter at training or on away trip, so that

895
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,440
Speaker 3: it's just easier for the moms to really do their

896
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 3: job and do it well and just focus on soccer

897
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:33,920
Speaker 3: and why they're there in the task at hand.

898
00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:38,799
Speaker 2: If you're a soccer fan, more specifically a Gotham FC fan,

899
00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:41,879
Speaker 2: you'll know that last year Ali led the team from

900
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:44,400
Speaker 2: the worst ranked team in the league to the champions

901
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,840
Speaker 2: of the National Women's Soccer League. And if you're a

902
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 2: die hard soccer fan, you'll know that the win was

903
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:54,000
Speaker 2: deeply personal for Ali, after just going through a highly

904
00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:58,080
Speaker 2: publicized separation and on the cusp of retirement, the championship

905
00:43:58,120 --> 00:44:01,800
Speaker 2: meant more than ever all that and more after the break.

906
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:11,320
Speaker 1: Now back to the show, Yeah.

907
00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 3: It makes me emotional because you know what I went through.

908
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:18,840
Speaker 3: Unfortunately at the very end of my career, I just

909
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:22,920
Speaker 3: wasn't expecting that. I think I'm still grieving from, you know,

910
00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:27,200
Speaker 3: just the fantasy that I had envisioned of what my

911
00:44:27,239 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 3: life was going to be with my ex and you know,

912
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:34,759
Speaker 3: our family and everything that we had worked towards and

913
00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:38,120
Speaker 3: everything we built and everything we had talked about in

914
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:43,320
Speaker 3: the future after retirement. That was I think what I'm

915
00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:47,239
Speaker 3: most sad about. And then I'm still grieving from and

916
00:44:47,280 --> 00:44:51,640
Speaker 3: I had to somehow, you know, pick up the pieces

917
00:44:53,920 --> 00:44:59,040
Speaker 3: after you know, she had left September fourth, and I

918
00:44:59,160 --> 00:45:03,480
Speaker 3: had to figure out a way to still fight for

919
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 3: what I always wanted in my career was to win

920
00:45:07,800 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 3: in the end of ASL because it is my home country.

921
00:45:11,160 --> 00:45:16,040
Speaker 3: Obviously it was my home league, and starting out the

922
00:45:16,160 --> 00:45:20,360
Speaker 3: league and ending on a championship would have been a

923
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:22,840
Speaker 3: dream for me at the time, you know, and knowing

924
00:45:22,880 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 3: that this was possible with the team and the players

925
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:28,439
Speaker 3: that we had, I knew in preseason right away, I said,

926
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:31,680
Speaker 3: this can be it, This can be it. And so

927
00:45:32,239 --> 00:45:36,799
Speaker 3: going through those last two three months were very devastating

928
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:40,840
Speaker 3: for me in my personal life and having to compartmentalize

929
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:45,279
Speaker 3: and push that aside and focus on you know, that

930
00:45:45,320 --> 00:45:48,560
Speaker 3: one goal and task at hand of winning a championship

931
00:45:49,160 --> 00:45:53,439
Speaker 3: was really hard for me. But also I turned all

932
00:45:53,480 --> 00:46:01,080
Speaker 3: of that sadness and grief and hurt and pain and

933
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:04,920
Speaker 3: everything I was experienced and confusion really all at once,

934
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:07,400
Speaker 3: and I just put that. I balled it up into

935
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:13,160
Speaker 3: a controlled energy that was so motivating, and I tried

936
00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:17,760
Speaker 3: to not show how much I actually was hurting every

937
00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 3: day in training, and I just for those two and

938
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:23,399
Speaker 3: a half three hours a day, I would show up,

939
00:46:23,719 --> 00:46:26,080
Speaker 3: I would just roll my sleeves up, I would perform,

940
00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:30,480
Speaker 3: I would play free, have focus, and play with so

941
00:46:30,640 --> 00:46:33,080
Speaker 3: much fun and joy because I didn't have to think

942
00:46:33,080 --> 00:46:35,520
Speaker 3: about anything else. And then I would just deal with

943
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,359
Speaker 3: all the hurt and the grief and the pain once

944
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:41,080
Speaker 3: again after training, and so I would really try to

945
00:46:41,080 --> 00:46:43,960
Speaker 3: put it aside because I didn't want them to know

946
00:46:44,719 --> 00:46:48,360
Speaker 3: how difficult of a time I was going through, because

947
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:51,160
Speaker 3: I didn't want to lose, and I wanted to be

948
00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:53,080
Speaker 3: there for them, and I wanted to lead by example

949
00:46:53,080 --> 00:46:56,759
Speaker 3: and continue to be that rock for the entire team

950
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,600
Speaker 3: that I knew I could be, and I wasn't gonna

951
00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:02,440
Speaker 3: let anyone or anything get in the way of that,

952
00:47:02,760 --> 00:47:07,359
Speaker 3: because I knew that I've worked so hard for this

953
00:47:07,920 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 3: year in this moment, and I wasn't going to allow

954
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:14,360
Speaker 3: it slip through my fingertips because I was right there,

955
00:47:14,960 --> 00:47:17,239
Speaker 3: and no matter what I was going through personally, I

956
00:47:17,480 --> 00:47:21,279
Speaker 3: just used that as a tool to really put all

957
00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:25,920
Speaker 3: that energy into performing well and try to take whatever

958
00:47:26,080 --> 00:47:29,279
Speaker 3: energy I had left from you know, that hurt and

959
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:31,759
Speaker 3: that pain. I obviously didn't have to take care of

960
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:35,319
Speaker 3: my kids, and then I show up to training and

961
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:39,120
Speaker 3: had to put on a face because obviously, you know,

962
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:42,400
Speaker 3: through social media it's difficult. And I never wanted my

963
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:45,520
Speaker 3: relationship and my marriage to really be that. I was

964
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:49,760
Speaker 3: never It's not a community marriage, it's not a community divorce.

965
00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 3: It's not a you know, a community separation. It's not

966
00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:58,360
Speaker 3: a relationship for the world to really understand and really dissect,

967
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:02,320
Speaker 3: which is the unfortunate thing that happened. And I couldn't

968
00:48:02,320 --> 00:48:06,000
Speaker 3: control that. I tried to just continue to focus on

969
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:07,799
Speaker 3: what I needed to focus on much was my job

970
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:11,560
Speaker 3: and winning and really rallying the team. But I am

971
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:15,920
Speaker 3: so grateful that when my teammates did start to recognize it,

972
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:18,719
Speaker 3: did start to notice that I wasn't okay. I had

973
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:20,880
Speaker 3: lost a lot of way too, to be honest, and

974
00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:23,320
Speaker 3: I was really going through a twelve pounds to be exact,

975
00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:28,440
Speaker 3: so my coaches started to notice, you know, the staff

976
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 3: in and around the team started to notice, and everybody

977
00:48:32,600 --> 00:48:35,880
Speaker 3: rallied around me made sure that I had everything I needed,

978
00:48:36,640 --> 00:48:41,760
Speaker 3: all the resources to just focus on winning and having

979
00:48:41,840 --> 00:48:47,000
Speaker 3: fun and smiling at training. And that's what I wanted

980
00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 3: to for myself. But without the team, I wouldn't have

981
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:53,440
Speaker 3: I wouldn't have won obviously, with them, I wouldn't have

982
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:55,960
Speaker 3: been my best. I was playing some of the best

983
00:48:55,960 --> 00:48:59,160
Speaker 3: football in my career during those few months, and I

984
00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:04,120
Speaker 3: was grieving, you know, my marriage Endi, and that was

985
00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:08,439
Speaker 3: so difficult for me because I never wanted that. And

986
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:11,600
Speaker 3: I just put all my focus into the team, and

987
00:49:11,640 --> 00:49:14,440
Speaker 3: they put all their focus into me, and they knew

988
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:17,399
Speaker 3: what it meant to me to end on top. And

989
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:20,319
Speaker 3: I am so grateful for them, and they will never

990
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:24,319
Speaker 3: realize what their support during that difficult moment in my

991
00:49:24,400 --> 00:49:28,440
Speaker 3: life really meant to me. And ultimately we just rallied

992
00:49:28,440 --> 00:49:32,440
Speaker 3: around each other and we figured it out, and literally

993
00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:34,920
Speaker 3: from one day to the next, I think it was

994
00:49:34,920 --> 00:49:37,520
Speaker 3: the day that the finally got released. I think after

995
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:41,600
Speaker 3: that day, our sole focus was just each other and

996
00:49:41,640 --> 00:49:45,120
Speaker 3: putting everything into the team, into each other and making

997
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 3: sure we were all okay and healthy and fit and

998
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:53,200
Speaker 3: strong enough to win, and that was just the turning point.

999
00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:54,360
Speaker 1: I think for everyone.

1000
00:49:54,800 --> 00:49:56,640
Speaker 2: The rest of the team feels that way too, Like

1001
00:49:56,680 --> 00:49:58,279
Speaker 2: they all feel that it was the turning point that

1002
00:49:58,280 --> 00:49:59,960
Speaker 2: they said, Okay, now we're going to do it for Alex,

1003
00:50:00,120 --> 00:50:01,960
Speaker 2: Like now now we're all at I mean, they were

1004
00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:04,920
Speaker 2: there with you immediately that day, right, they kind of

1005
00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:05,279
Speaker 2: came over.

1006
00:50:05,360 --> 00:50:07,880
Speaker 3: They can't really stayed till like two thirty in the morning,

1007
00:50:08,160 --> 00:50:10,959
Speaker 3: and I'll never forget it. And my kids were there

1008
00:50:11,560 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 3: and we were just they're bringing wine in, they're bringing flowers,

1009
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 3: you know. They some of them had a you know,

1010
00:50:18,200 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 3: an appearance at paper Planes Coffee right around the corner,

1011
00:50:21,040 --> 00:50:23,040
Speaker 3: and they came over after at night and.

1012
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:26,120
Speaker 1: We turned on YouTube music videos and we were dancing

1013
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:26,920
Speaker 1: in the playroom.

1014
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:29,399
Speaker 3: I actually had, you know, my stylist at the time

1015
00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:32,879
Speaker 3: was there prepping for my whole media day that next day.

1016
00:50:32,920 --> 00:50:34,719
Speaker 3: It was the Thursday, was in the city and I

1017
00:50:34,719 --> 00:50:37,840
Speaker 3: had a whole media day. And they didn't realize that

1018
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:40,640
Speaker 3: it was one of the best days of my life.

1019
00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:45,080
Speaker 3: After like reading about one of the worst, you know,

1020
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:47,880
Speaker 3: one of the worst things that could happen to me

1021
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:51,440
Speaker 3: personally and in my relationships. So it was really great

1022
00:50:51,480 --> 00:50:54,760
Speaker 3: and I appreciate them and they'll never realize how much

1023
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:55,680
Speaker 3: it was.

1024
00:50:55,800 --> 00:50:57,759
Speaker 1: Just like our bond was unbreakable.

1025
00:50:58,040 --> 00:51:01,960
Speaker 3: And I hope that's still the case, you know, because

1026
00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:05,319
Speaker 3: I think that's why we won. We weren't necessarily I

1027
00:51:05,320 --> 00:51:08,360
Speaker 3: don't think the you know, obviously we weren't the best

1028
00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:11,759
Speaker 3: team all year, right, we kind of squeaked into the playoffs.

1029
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,279
Speaker 3: We deserve to be there in the top six. Don't

1030
00:51:14,280 --> 00:51:16,560
Speaker 3: get me wrong. I personally thought we were the best team,

1031
00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:19,920
Speaker 3: but you know, obviously within the league that's so difficult.

1032
00:51:20,520 --> 00:51:23,799
Speaker 3: You know that there's so many good teams, and we

1033
00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:28,120
Speaker 3: were the best team, as you know, just our relationship

1034
00:51:28,160 --> 00:51:31,680
Speaker 3: with each other and our camaraderie and the way that

1035
00:51:31,760 --> 00:51:34,759
Speaker 3: we fought together and the way that we supported each other.

1036
00:51:35,280 --> 00:51:38,000
Speaker 3: So our culture that we created and the environment that

1037
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:42,000
Speaker 3: we created within the locker room is really ultimately along

1038
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 3: with the leadership of the coaching staff and one and

1039
00:51:44,680 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 3: yah Elle, but it really helped us win, and that

1040
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:49,560
Speaker 3: is what we can all lean on at the end

1041
00:51:49,600 --> 00:51:52,160
Speaker 3: of the day. And I hope that is still the case,

1042
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:56,200
Speaker 3: because when your locker room is healthy and really in

1043
00:51:56,239 --> 00:52:01,680
Speaker 3: a good place then on field be you know, even better.

1044
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:05,640
Speaker 2: Okay, so let's talk about your post retirement life. How

1045
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:07,799
Speaker 2: are you changing your metrics of success now?

1046
00:52:08,520 --> 00:52:10,840
Speaker 3: There's always it's so difficult as I'm always, you know,

1047
00:52:10,920 --> 00:52:13,399
Speaker 3: I strive to be the best in everything, right. I'm

1048
00:52:13,560 --> 00:52:17,520
Speaker 3: very you know, perfectionists, and I want to be good

1049
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:21,400
Speaker 3: at everything I do. It's difficult now because I've been

1050
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:25,360
Speaker 3: playing soccer for obviously so long in the professional atmosphere

1051
00:52:25,360 --> 00:52:27,520
Speaker 3: for like seventeen eighteen years. But now I have to

1052
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:31,719
Speaker 3: kind of translate that motivation and other passions and try

1053
00:52:31,719 --> 00:52:34,920
Speaker 3: to be successful in those just a different capacity. The

1054
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,399
Speaker 3: structure is different. I have no schedule really now. It's

1055
00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 3: just kind of all over the place, and so that's

1056
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:42,520
Speaker 3: that's different for me, and that's really hard because in

1057
00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:44,719
Speaker 3: football there's always someone telling you where to go, what

1058
00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:46,799
Speaker 3: to do, what to eat, how to sleep, you know,

1059
00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:48,560
Speaker 3: what to put in your body in order to be

1060
00:52:48,640 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 3: your best, how to work out, you know, all the

1061
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:53,640
Speaker 3: little details that you need to perform your best.

1062
00:52:53,680 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 1: And I don't have that anymore.

1063
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:57,440
Speaker 3: I have my own schedule, I you know, have to

1064
00:52:57,480 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 3: figure out what I'm going to work out and set

1065
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:02,399
Speaker 3: that up and everything's kind of on my own. Yeah,

1066
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:04,239
Speaker 3: I have a great team of people that you know,

1067
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:06,719
Speaker 3: help and support me with my agency, but just me

1068
00:53:06,760 --> 00:53:08,880
Speaker 3: as an individual, just as a mom and a woman's

1069
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:11,200
Speaker 3: it's really hard. I have a lot more time for

1070
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:13,799
Speaker 3: my friends and family, which I'm so appreciative of because

1071
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:16,160
Speaker 3: that's what I've wanted for so long. Obviously, I don't

1072
00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:17,920
Speaker 3: call football a sacrifice.

1073
00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:18,720
Speaker 1: It was a choice.

1074
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:21,080
Speaker 3: And so it's a choice to miss all the events

1075
00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:22,759
Speaker 3: and all the things because you're actually doing what you

1076
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:23,239
Speaker 3: love to do.

1077
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:24,200
Speaker 1: So I didn't mind that.

1078
00:53:24,440 --> 00:53:26,440
Speaker 3: But now it's nice to kind of be able to

1079
00:53:26,440 --> 00:53:29,920
Speaker 3: go to weddings and you know, celebrations of life so

1080
00:53:29,960 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 3: to speak, or you know, just birthdays and anniversaries and

1081
00:53:34,560 --> 00:53:35,239
Speaker 3: things like that.

1082
00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:38,080
Speaker 2: And on the personal side, how do you think about

1083
00:53:38,160 --> 00:53:39,799
Speaker 2: the next phase for you? I know you've said you've

1084
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 2: been open to dating one hundred percent of the population,

1085
00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:42,799
Speaker 2: have you been?

1086
00:53:43,200 --> 00:53:47,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm actually dating a wonderful person right now who

1087
00:53:47,360 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 3: I really really like and so grateful that we met.

1088
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:55,120
Speaker 3: And I can see, you know, a happiness light at

1089
00:53:55,160 --> 00:53:57,840
Speaker 3: the end of the tunnel. And I think the timing

1090
00:53:58,000 --> 00:54:02,960
Speaker 3: was really great because you know, I gave myself time,

1091
00:54:03,280 --> 00:54:06,800
Speaker 3: which was maybe forced time, because this wasn't my choice

1092
00:54:07,840 --> 00:54:12,480
Speaker 3: to end. You know, now still separated. You know, we're

1093
00:54:12,520 --> 00:54:14,759
Speaker 3: not divorced yet, which not a lot of people know.

1094
00:54:15,200 --> 00:54:17,480
Speaker 3: We're still going through that process. But it gave me

1095
00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:21,520
Speaker 3: time from when she left to really focus on obviously

1096
00:54:21,560 --> 00:54:25,160
Speaker 3: soccer and finishing my career, but then healing my wounds

1097
00:54:25,239 --> 00:54:27,960
Speaker 3: and kind of licking my wounds, so to speak, and

1098
00:54:28,040 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 3: really digging deeper into myself and maybe the reasons of

1099
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,719
Speaker 3: what I needed to work on and hold myself accountable

1100
00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 3: because I wasn't perfect either, but I was willing to

1101
00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:42,080
Speaker 3: work at it, and I was willing to stay and

1102
00:54:42,120 --> 00:54:45,920
Speaker 3: I was willing to really fight because I really loved

1103
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:49,320
Speaker 3: what we had and I really loved her and I

1104
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:53,480
Speaker 3: obviously are kids, and so that that process, I think

1105
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:57,240
Speaker 3: now eight nine months down the road, has now given

1106
00:54:57,239 --> 00:55:01,120
Speaker 3: me time to grieve and to sort through all those feelings,

1107
00:55:01,480 --> 00:55:04,680
Speaker 3: and I think this is a really healthy place to

1108
00:55:04,719 --> 00:55:08,080
Speaker 3: be and I'm really excited that hopefully one day my

1109
00:55:08,160 --> 00:55:13,839
Speaker 3: kids can meet them. And yeah, I'm actually really really

1110
00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:15,040
Speaker 3: happy at the moment.

1111
00:55:15,840 --> 00:55:18,959
Speaker 2: Okay, so my final question, Okay, what is one thing

1112
00:55:19,200 --> 00:55:21,920
Speaker 2: that at the time in your life you thought my god,

1113
00:55:22,080 --> 00:55:23,520
Speaker 2: this is terrible, the worst.

1114
00:55:23,560 --> 00:55:24,600
Speaker 1: I'm never going to get out of this.

1115
00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:27,520
Speaker 2: And now in retrospect, do you see it as having

1116
00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:29,680
Speaker 2: really launched you into the position you are now?

1117
00:55:30,520 --> 00:55:31,359
Speaker 1: I would say two things.

1118
00:55:31,360 --> 00:55:34,279
Speaker 3: I would say, like my injury back in college where

1119
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:36,840
Speaker 3: I almost lost my life at twenty one, where I

1120
00:55:36,960 --> 00:55:39,040
Speaker 3: was just a whole new perspective on life, a whole

1121
00:55:39,080 --> 00:55:41,840
Speaker 3: lease on life, because I honestly, if I would have

1122
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:45,200
Speaker 3: I wish my ex basically saved my life. I feel

1123
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:47,080
Speaker 3: like I owe I owe my a lot, I owe

1124
00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:49,440
Speaker 3: them a lot because I wouldn't have gone to the

1125
00:55:49,440 --> 00:55:51,480
Speaker 3: hospital that night if he didn't encourage it, and they

1126
00:55:51,480 --> 00:55:52,719
Speaker 3: said if I would have slept through the night, I

1127
00:55:52,719 --> 00:55:55,920
Speaker 3: probably would have died because of my blood clots and

1128
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:56,920
Speaker 3: the poment embolism.

1129
00:55:57,000 --> 00:55:58,439
Speaker 1: So that was one.

1130
00:55:59,120 --> 00:56:01,799
Speaker 3: And then just kind of fighting back to get on

1131
00:56:01,840 --> 00:56:04,160
Speaker 3: the field after that experience was really difficult. I never

1132
00:56:04,239 --> 00:56:05,839
Speaker 3: knew if I would be able to play again, kind

1133
00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:08,239
Speaker 3: of going through the pulmonary embolism. So that's separate, and

1134
00:56:08,239 --> 00:56:11,040
Speaker 3: that was twenty one, and then now finishing my career

1135
00:56:11,080 --> 00:56:15,680
Speaker 3: but also going through this separation is really that really

1136
00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:18,920
Speaker 3: took a toll on me. It really put me in

1137
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:22,360
Speaker 3: a dark place because I was never expecting it and

1138
00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:27,400
Speaker 3: I never wanted it, And now I know that it

1139
00:56:27,520 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 3: honestly was a gift because I don't think I would

1140
00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:33,040
Speaker 3: have ever left, and I think the universe sent me

1141
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:36,160
Speaker 3: a gift because I have never felt more free and

1142
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:40,200
Speaker 3: happy now in my life and in my new dating

1143
00:56:40,280 --> 00:56:44,279
Speaker 3: life too. I feel very lucky because I probably would

1144
00:56:44,360 --> 00:56:47,120
Speaker 3: never be in this position, and so many other opportunities

1145
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:48,960
Speaker 3: are kind of coming at me, and I don't know

1146
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:51,279
Speaker 3: if I would have really taken them on if I

1147
00:56:51,360 --> 00:56:53,880
Speaker 3: was still in that partnership, because my life would have

1148
00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:57,000
Speaker 3: probably looked a little different. And so I think everything

1149
00:56:57,000 --> 00:56:59,680
Speaker 3: happens for a reason. And now I can't, you know,

1150
00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:02,319
Speaker 3: contry anyone else's behavior. I just have to focus on

1151
00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:04,080
Speaker 3: how I react to to it.

1152
00:57:04,920 --> 00:57:07,040
Speaker 1: Ali, you are so incredible. Thank you so much for

1153
00:57:07,080 --> 00:57:07,400
Speaker 1: coming on.

1154
00:57:11,280 --> 00:57:14,239
Speaker 2: Ali is continuing to have an impact on soccer as

1155
00:57:14,239 --> 00:57:18,720
Speaker 2: an ESPN analyst. Despite her retirement, she remains dedicated to

1156
00:57:18,800 --> 00:57:23,280
Speaker 2: pushing forward women's soccer in every aspect. After my family

1157
00:57:23,320 --> 00:57:25,680
Speaker 2: and I became co owners of GOTAM this past fall,

1158
00:57:26,240 --> 00:57:28,440
Speaker 2: I was in awe of her leadership to both the

1159
00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 2: team and the industry as a whole. I just know

1160
00:57:31,320 --> 00:57:35,680
Speaker 2: the retirement is just the beginning for Ali. Keep up

1161
00:57:35,680 --> 00:57:39,000
Speaker 2: to date with all things Ali on Instagram at Ali Krieger.

1162
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:41,760
Speaker 2: She has a few exciting announcements coming up, so be

1163
00:57:41,840 --> 00:57:45,480
Speaker 2: sure to follow PS. The Olympics start this week and

1164
00:57:45,520 --> 00:57:48,800
Speaker 2: the US women's soccer team plays their first match tomorrow night,

1165
00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:51,800
Speaker 2: with six of the US players coming from Gotham, so

1166
00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:53,360
Speaker 2: be sure to tune in and support.

1167
00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:55,160
Speaker 1: Talk to you next week.

1168
00:57:56,640 --> 00:58:00,440
Speaker 2: Special thanks to the she Pivots Team, Executive producer Emily

1169
00:58:00,600 --> 00:58:04,840
Speaker 2: Eda Belosk, Associate producer and social media connoisseur Hannah Cousins,

1170
00:58:05,240 --> 00:58:10,160
Speaker 2: Research director Christine Dickinson, Events and Logistics coordinator Madeline Sonovic,

1171
00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:14,960
Speaker 2: and audio editor and mixer Nina pollock I endorse te

1172
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:16,080
Speaker 2: Pisits