WEBVTT - Don't assume the worst 

0:00:03.440 --> 0:00:06.720
<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.

0:00:09.400 --> 0:00:14.720
<v Speaker 1>Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

0:00:15.520 --> 0:00:20.079
<v Speaker 1>Today's tip is to not assume the worst. When you

0:00:20.120 --> 0:00:24.040
<v Speaker 1>are working remotely, as many people are these days, it's

0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:29.320
<v Speaker 1>easy to assume that silence, delays or short replies are nefarious,

0:00:29.960 --> 0:00:35.080
<v Speaker 1>but they usually aren't, So don't jump to negative conclusions

0:00:35.520 --> 0:00:39.720
<v Speaker 1>and ruin your day when you don't need to. More

0:00:39.760 --> 0:00:42.959
<v Speaker 1>than a year after the pandemic started, many people are

0:00:43.000 --> 0:00:47.520
<v Speaker 1>still working from home, which is great. Many knowledge jobs

0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:51.400
<v Speaker 1>can be done remotely, at least part time. I'm thrilled

0:00:51.440 --> 0:00:54.400
<v Speaker 1>with all the time and gas money people are saving.

0:00:55.720 --> 0:00:58.640
<v Speaker 1>But when you are working by yourself at home, certain

0:00:58.720 --> 0:01:03.160
<v Speaker 1>cues can be missing. In the absence of communication, it

0:01:03.320 --> 0:01:07.720
<v Speaker 1>is easy to assume the worst. For instance, let's say

0:01:07.760 --> 0:01:10.120
<v Speaker 1>you email your boss a new idea you had on

0:01:10.160 --> 0:01:13.440
<v Speaker 1>a project. If you were working in an office, you

0:01:13.520 --> 0:01:15.960
<v Speaker 1>might see that she was not at her desk and

0:01:16.000 --> 0:01:18.600
<v Speaker 1>in fact was deeply involved in a long meeting with

0:01:18.680 --> 0:01:22.840
<v Speaker 1>her supervisor in a nearby conference room. You'd know that

0:01:22.880 --> 0:01:26.480
<v Speaker 1>she hadn't responded for several hours because she was doing

0:01:26.560 --> 0:01:30.560
<v Speaker 1>something else. Most likely, she hadn't even read your note.

0:01:30.640 --> 0:01:35.039
<v Speaker 1>Yet when you're working from home, you don't see this context.

0:01:35.800 --> 0:01:37.600
<v Speaker 1>So when you don't get an email back in the

0:01:37.640 --> 0:01:40.840
<v Speaker 1>next hour saying hey, great idea, let's definitely explore this,

0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:46.959
<v Speaker 1>your brain might start working on other explanations. She hates

0:01:47.040 --> 0:01:51.160
<v Speaker 1>my idea, she never likes any of my ideas. Why

0:01:51.200 --> 0:01:54.640
<v Speaker 1>do I even bother trying around here? I knew this

0:01:54.680 --> 0:01:57.520
<v Speaker 1>would never work out. I'm no good at this end.

0:01:58.200 --> 0:02:02.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh my goodness. To say this is unproductive is a

0:02:02.120 --> 0:02:06.600
<v Speaker 1>massive understatement. Or maybe you're working with someone you haven't

0:02:06.600 --> 0:02:10.320
<v Speaker 1>worked with much before. You send a note explaining the

0:02:10.400 --> 0:02:14.120
<v Speaker 1>schedule for your upcoming project. You get back a short

0:02:14.760 --> 0:02:18.080
<v Speaker 1>sounds good. If your new colleague said this to you

0:02:18.120 --> 0:02:20.520
<v Speaker 1>in person, you might get a smile and a nod

0:02:20.919 --> 0:02:23.720
<v Speaker 1>and an indication that he's really excited about the project

0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:26.880
<v Speaker 1>and that he thought your schedule was flawless, so there's

0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:31.000
<v Speaker 1>really no point in him changing anything. In other words, yep,

0:02:31.639 --> 0:02:35.040
<v Speaker 1>it sounds good. But since you don't get any of

0:02:35.040 --> 0:02:40.200
<v Speaker 1>these emotional cues, and since written words are automatically perceived

0:02:40.200 --> 0:02:44.000
<v Speaker 1>as more negative than spoken words, well, you might assume

0:02:44.040 --> 0:02:48.040
<v Speaker 1>he doesn't care much about the project. You start worrying

0:02:48.080 --> 0:02:53.079
<v Speaker 1>about working together. What have you gotten yourself into. You

0:02:53.120 --> 0:02:56.360
<v Speaker 1>start with a negative thesis about your new colleague and

0:02:56.400 --> 0:03:00.440
<v Speaker 1>then you look for evidence to support it. This is

0:03:00.440 --> 0:03:04.320
<v Speaker 1>not going to bode well for the project, so don't

0:03:04.680 --> 0:03:10.880
<v Speaker 1>do it. Don't assume the worst wherever possible, assume the best,

0:03:11.680 --> 0:03:15.440
<v Speaker 1>or at least an explanation that is marginally positive. Yes,

0:03:15.520 --> 0:03:18.320
<v Speaker 1>I guess it is theoretically possible that your boss may

0:03:18.360 --> 0:03:21.200
<v Speaker 1>hate your ideas and be secretly plotting to fire you.

0:03:21.840 --> 0:03:25.320
<v Speaker 1>Do you really think that's the case. Better to assume

0:03:25.320 --> 0:03:27.960
<v Speaker 1>that she will like your idea, she just hasn't gotten

0:03:28.000 --> 0:03:31.200
<v Speaker 1>the chance to focus on it yet. Better to assume

0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:35.920
<v Speaker 1>that your colleague isn't difficult, and that sounds good means

0:03:35.960 --> 0:03:40.880
<v Speaker 1>just that it all sounds good. Assuming the worst burns

0:03:40.920 --> 0:03:45.240
<v Speaker 1>all kinds of time and energy. Assuming a better explanation

0:03:45.840 --> 0:03:50.720
<v Speaker 1>allows us to make allowances for all we don't know. Yes,

0:03:50.760 --> 0:03:54.800
<v Speaker 1>of course, sometimes things go badly, but in general, most

0:03:54.920 --> 0:03:58.880
<v Speaker 1>colleagues want to work together well. When we understand that

0:03:58.920 --> 0:04:02.760
<v Speaker 1>working remotely sometimes keeps us from seeing the whole context,

0:04:03.320 --> 0:04:07.160
<v Speaker 1>we can take that into account, and that allows us

0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:11.720
<v Speaker 1>to get a lot more done in the meantime. This

0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:15.560
<v Speaker 1>is Laura. Thanks for listening and here's to making the

0:04:15.600 --> 0:04:24.560
<v Speaker 1>most of our time. Hey everybody, I'd love to hear

0:04:24.600 --> 0:04:27.359
<v Speaker 1>from you. You can send me your tips, your questions,

0:04:27.480 --> 0:04:31.240
<v Speaker 1>or anything else. Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook

0:04:31.320 --> 0:04:36.840
<v Speaker 1>and Instagram at Before Breakfast pod. That's B the number four,

0:04:37.360 --> 0:04:40.840
<v Speaker 1>then breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me

0:04:40.880 --> 0:04:44.560
<v Speaker 1>an email at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media

0:04:44.640 --> 0:04:47.240
<v Speaker 1>dot com that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all

0:04:47.279 --> 0:04:50.080
<v Speaker 1>the letters. Thanks so much, I look forward to staying

0:04:50.080 --> 0:04:58.760
<v Speaker 1>in touch. Before Breakfast is a production of I heart Radio.

0:04:59.360 --> 0:05:02.159
<v Speaker 1>For more pod casts from I heart Radio, visit the

0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:05.720
<v Speaker 1>i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen

0:05:05.760 --> 0:05:08.800
<v Speaker 1>to your favorite shows. M