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Speaker 1: Hey, guys, welcome to another episode of Eating While Broke.

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Speaker 1: Today I have a very special guest, reality TV star

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Speaker 1: musician mother.

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Speaker 2: I mean a butterfly is.

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Speaker 1: In the building. Yes, yes, yes, and I'm very excited

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Speaker 1: to have you here. I met you a couple of

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Speaker 1: years ago and you were a breath of fresh air,

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Speaker 1: very beautiful in person.

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Speaker 2: Today. What will you have us eat?

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Speaker 3: Okay, so I'm gonna have us eat a super simple

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Speaker 3: breakfast dish. Actually it's two separate dishes, but they are

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Speaker 3: easy to make, cheap, and you know something that I

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Speaker 3: ate a lot during hard times. So one is a

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Speaker 3: apples and oatmeal. That German term for it is a

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Speaker 3: famously and I actually used to eat it as well

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Speaker 3: as I you know, was growing up in Germany, and

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Speaker 3: then I took it along with me into, you know,

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Speaker 3: my struggle.

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Speaker 4: Times in New York.

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Speaker 3: But the other one is a German pancake, also super simple,

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Speaker 3: and it's a little bit different than you know, the

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Speaker 3: pancakes that people are used to in America, the few ones.

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Speaker 3: It's more like a almost like a crape. But it's

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Speaker 3: a German pancake and easy to make.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So it's it's apple and and oats.

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Speaker 4: And then and I used to eat it for breakfast

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Speaker 4: all the time.

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Speaker 2: So for the oats, what are the ingredients?

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Speaker 4: So it's old fashioned oats. It is apple.

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Speaker 3: I use one apple for one serving, so if I

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Speaker 3: just eat it by myself, it'll be one apple, and

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Speaker 3: I put almonds, orange juice and cinnamon, and that's it.

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Speaker 3: And it's not it doesn't have to be cooked on

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Speaker 3: the stove. So you can just wait a minute. How

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Speaker 3: is it not cooked on the stove? You don't cook

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Speaker 3: it on the stove.

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Speaker 4: That's the okay.

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Speaker 1: And then and then for the pancakes, the pancakes.

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Speaker 4: Ingredients are flour, milk, sugar, and eggs.

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Speaker 1: Awesome, this is pretty simple. I've never heard of any

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Speaker 1: of the above. I'm going to ask you to repeat

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Speaker 1: the name of the way you said it.

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Speaker 2: In Germany, I.

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Speaker 3: Call it famously, and it's apples and odes basically the translation.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, yeah, but it's in German.

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Speaker 1: That's what it sounds like. Okay, it sounds really special

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Speaker 1: when you say it. But all right, so walk us through.

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Speaker 1: Go ahead, go ahead with the apples. Okay, take a bowl,

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Speaker 1: you peel the apples.

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Speaker 3: Peel on it, and then you need a shredder like this,

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Speaker 3: and you just go all around.

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Speaker 2: Until you know you come to the.

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Speaker 1: And just so you know, if I would have, like

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Speaker 1: actually known about this dish, I would have helped you

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Speaker 1: pre make it.

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Speaker 4: But like, it's literally it's super fast to make.

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Speaker 3: This is probably the most annoying part because you know,

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Speaker 3: you get your fingers dirty and stuff like that.

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Speaker 4: But it's apple.

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Speaker 2: It's an apple. Yeah, it's apple. I didn't know what

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Speaker 2: kind of apples do you like? I only eat honey.

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Speaker 1: Crisp, But for this dish, I picked up Granny Smith.

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Speaker 2: I love it. You can use any apple that you like.

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Speaker 3: If you like sweeter, you know, obviously you would pick

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Speaker 3: like a Pink Lady or whatever you like.

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Speaker 2: Any kind of apple works. I was thinking more sour.

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Speaker 3: That's why sour is always good, even though this dish

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Speaker 3: does not have any sugar.

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Speaker 4: That's why what I like about is healthy too.

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Speaker 3: It's a super healthy breakfast dish, and that should be

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Speaker 3: enough for this.

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Speaker 2: I'm more curious how you're gonna do this without a

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Speaker 2: stood Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Man, this doesn't see When I tell people about this dish,

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Speaker 3: I actually posted it before on social media and people

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Speaker 3: were like, wait, you don't cook the oats.

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Speaker 4: I don't eat oats with that, you know, without them

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Speaker 4: being cooked. And so you just I don't measure as

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Speaker 4: you see, I don't measure anything.

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Speaker 2: I like that. That's a respectable I think.

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Speaker 3: That's yeah, a little bit more because it should be

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Speaker 3: equal amount apple and oats.

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Speaker 2: And then we take the chopped.

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Speaker 1: Almonds, and just so you guys know, she actually buy hand,

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Speaker 1: took a knife and just chopped the almonds.

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Speaker 4: I did, but it also didn't take long.

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Speaker 2: And then all I need.

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Speaker 3: Is cinnamon because that gives it the flavor that makes

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Speaker 3: it so good.

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Speaker 4: And then the orange juice, and.

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Speaker 5: We I've never seen this, I know, like people like

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Speaker 5: orange juice with oats, no way, But wait till you

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Speaker 5: taste it because the apple, I think it doesn't want

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Speaker 5: to you don't want to make it, you know, want

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Speaker 5: to have it swim in it, but you want a

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Speaker 5: definitely nice and moist.

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Speaker 1: And this is something this is is this like culturally

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Speaker 1: normal in Germany?

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Speaker 3: You know what I think it's it's actually my mom

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Speaker 3: made it up. It's not a typical German recipe, okay,

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Speaker 3: but it's something that my mom.

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Speaker 4: Introduced me to.

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Speaker 3: And I just remember that I used to always make

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Speaker 3: it when I just was hungry in the morning and

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Speaker 3: wanted something healthy and fresh, because you know.

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Speaker 2: It looks super healthy. This is it, you guys, This

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Speaker 2: is all all you have to do that too. It's vegan.

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Speaker 2: It's vegan, guys. I didn't even learn my first vegan this.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I did not even even think about the aspect

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Speaker 3: of being vegan.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the thing.

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Speaker 1: What was going on at the time when your mom

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Speaker 1: had she was making up dishes?

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Speaker 2: Like was she Were you guys struggling or.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I don't know if I want to

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Speaker 3: say struggling. But we definitely were poor. We didn't grow

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Speaker 3: up with much and my mom never had much money.

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Speaker 2: Single mom.

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Speaker 3: Dad left when we when I was eight, and yeah,

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Speaker 3: we never had much even before when dad was around, Like,

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Speaker 3: we were never.

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Speaker 4: A family of like eating out was like wait what.

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Speaker 3: We never got to eat outside or like in a

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Speaker 3: restaurant or something like that. So I definitely my mom

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Speaker 3: would always freestyle cook and do things like this, and

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Speaker 3: that's I think where I got it from now, as

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Speaker 3: you know, being my having kids myself, I think I

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Speaker 3: got a lot of my style of cooking from my mother.

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Speaker 4: Just whipping stuff together and then it's coming out.

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Speaker 1: Well, let's let's sample it, so no cooking. She just

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Speaker 1: fixed the apples with the oatmeal. Who was the oats

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Speaker 1: and orange juice and almonds, and it looks delicious.

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Speaker 2: And guys, I have just.

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Speaker 1: Learned how to make my first vegan dish, which you

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Speaker 1: guys know I'm trying to eventually switch over to vegans.

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Speaker 2: So and it looks very beautiful.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I are you vegan. I'm not vegan, but I eat.

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Speaker 3: I like to eat healthy, you know, I don't eat

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Speaker 3: a lot of meat and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: And you see, I'm excited.

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Speaker 4: What you think.

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Speaker 2: It's not sweet?

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Speaker 4: It's really good.

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Speaker 2: You good at sugar? If you like it, doesn't eat sugar.

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Speaker 1: You could also adding that my apple, I chose the

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Speaker 1: Granny Smith, which was sour.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know what to expect I did it. I

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Speaker 2: was like if I go sweet, but no, I would choose.

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Speaker 4: You could probably choose a sweeter apple.

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Speaker 3: And you could also add like, if you like raisins,

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Speaker 3: my mom used to put raisins in it.

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Speaker 4: I don't love raisins, so I always make it like this.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I would leave it like this. Yeah, And people

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Speaker 2: love it.

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Speaker 4: People are like orange juice with olds.

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Speaker 2: I don't know about that.

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Speaker 1: But with the apple, the part of me feels like

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't mix this with a little bit of yogurt,

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Speaker 1: but I don't know if that would mess it up.

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Speaker 3: I just don't know about mixing orange juice with Maybe

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Speaker 3: maybe you could wear that, right, There's one things for sure.

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Speaker 3: It's super healthy and easy to make, and you don't

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Speaker 3: need much.

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Speaker 2: You can leave the almonds out.

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Speaker 4: If you do.

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Speaker 2: Your kids know how to make this.

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Speaker 3: They yeah, they absolutely do, but they you know, I

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Speaker 3: still make it for them just because I.

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Speaker 6: Don't want them to hurt their fingers on this. But

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Speaker 6: they know how to make it. I know this dish

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Speaker 6: is good because I'm gonna finish it. So this is

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Speaker 6: a tad out of ten.

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Speaker 3: Okay, oh yeah, See it's not for everybody. But if

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Speaker 3: you like me and you like something healthy in the morning,

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Speaker 3: something quick.

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Speaker 1: I will say in this dish too. If you're not

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Speaker 1: a fan of an oatmeal, this is the best way

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Speaker 1: to eat it.

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Speaker 4: See, it doesn't taste like the typical oatmeal.

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Speaker 1: It doesn't like it does not like like you know.

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Speaker 1: For me, oatmeal has textures that I don't really like.

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Speaker 1: But I could totally eat this every day. I think

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Speaker 1: this will be my meal of choice because it's super healthy, super.

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Speaker 2: Different, even if you made a full breakfast and just

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Speaker 2: had this on the side.

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Speaker 4: Crazy thing, the kids love it.

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Speaker 3: My kids at least love it, and you know you're

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Speaker 3: feeding your kids something good.

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Speaker 2: I think the orange just really seals it.

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Speaker 3: Mm hm.

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Speaker 2: That's the crazy part. The thing that people are questioning

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Speaker 2: is what makes it feel that dish?

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Speaker 3: Yes, the next one, So the next one I think

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Speaker 3: even easier and simpler.

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Speaker 1: That was amazing for I think that was the first

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Speaker 1: time I actually enjoyed oatmeal one hundred percent.

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Speaker 3: Should I just go ahead and make it? This is

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Speaker 3: gonna be the German pancake. You gonna go ahead, So stove.

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Speaker 2: On and she used the butterspray.

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Speaker 3: Guys, I'm going to use the egg and the milk

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Speaker 3: and the sugar.

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Speaker 4: I think I need to pour a little bit out because.

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Speaker 2: We have too much, too much flour.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I'm mixing it with the Yeah, you're you're We're

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Speaker 3: not gonna use that, okay, So all we need is

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Speaker 3: the flour, the egg, the milk, and the sugar.

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Speaker 4: Mix it all together.

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Speaker 2: Flour egg, milk, sugar.

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Speaker 4: And again I'm not confiding. I'm just oh light whisk

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Speaker 4: yeah's good as you pour the milk.

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Speaker 1: I feel so lazy because I always buy the she

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Speaker 1: made pancake mix and just add one.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah.

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Speaker 3: I never even like growing up. My mom made everything

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Speaker 3: from scratch. And again this is something that came from

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Speaker 3: home from Germany and that I brought with me once I,

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Speaker 3: you know, we moved to New York, me and my sisters.

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Speaker 2: I didn't have much either. What made you guys move

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Speaker 2: to New York? You know, music?

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Speaker 4: Like you know what age? I was nineteen, Okay, I

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Speaker 4: was nineteen.

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Speaker 3: My twin I have a twin sister, Jazz, who obviously

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Speaker 3: also was nineteen at the time, and then our oldest sister, Sophie,

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Speaker 3: two years older. You guys packed up together and packed

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Speaker 3: up and just moved to New York all.

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Speaker 2: What was your mom saying?

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Speaker 4: You know?

228
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Speaker 3: She what made her comfortable is that we were together. Okay,

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Speaker 3: I think it was. If it would have been just

230
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Speaker 3: one of us, like would have been different. But we

231
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Speaker 3: were always together. She trusted us.

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Speaker 4: She wasn't really concerned, which is crazy.

233
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Speaker 3: Because we really went to New York with nothing like

234
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:06,880
Speaker 3: no plan, no, no money?

235
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Speaker 2: Really well did she did?

236
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Speaker 1: She also feel like she still had a choice in

237
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Speaker 1: it or you guys kind even came to her like

238
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Speaker 1: we're leaving.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, we we we decided we were going, and

240
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Speaker 3: she could. She wouldn't have been able to stop us

241
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Speaker 3: even if she she didn't try, but if she would

242
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Speaker 3: have said, like, no, I don't think it's a good idea.

243
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Speaker 4: We our mind was made up, you know, to go

244
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Speaker 4: to New York.

245
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Speaker 2: So she was a single mom with how many kids?

246
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Speaker 2: She had twins?

247
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Speaker 1: By the way, Oh yeah, I'm a fraternal But are

248
00:11:36,640 --> 00:11:37,880
Speaker 1: you fraternal or identical?

249
00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:42,800
Speaker 4: I am identical identical twin my sister exactly like.

250
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Speaker 2: Me, No way, So I always like here with her,

251
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:48,839
Speaker 2: Yeah I have I have heart.

252
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Speaker 4: People always like is this at me?

253
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Speaker 2: And now were the twin?

254
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Speaker 1: So your mom had your you and your your sister

255
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,680
Speaker 1: and who else was in the Yes, me and my

256
00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:58,720
Speaker 1: twin are older sister.

257
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Speaker 3: And then my mom had another child by another man

258
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Speaker 3: when I was eleven, so I have an eleven year

259
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Speaker 3: younger sister also.

260
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Speaker 4: So it was four of us, four girls.

261
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Speaker 3: Wow, yeah, but the three of us, the three of

262
00:12:11,679 --> 00:12:15,319
Speaker 3: us are older sisters. We were very close, and we

263
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,600
Speaker 3: would do everything together, and we you know, we started

264
00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:20,439
Speaker 3: singing together. So we were we've kind of always had

265
00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:23,760
Speaker 3: been a group, a singing group, and you, oh, you.

266
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Speaker 2: Guys were in a group. Yeah, there was no jealousy

267
00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:29,000
Speaker 2: or rivalry between you and your sister. Absolutely not.

268
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Speaker 4: Now.

269
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Speaker 3: We were more like I think we wouldn't have gotten

270
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,760
Speaker 3: into music even if if we weren't sisters, because it

271
00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:40,840
Speaker 3: was a whole you know, it was that whole singing

272
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:43,040
Speaker 3: in harmony, all of that stuff that we would do.

273
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Speaker 4: You know.

274
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Speaker 2: It was the nineties. Nineties.

275
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:48,520
Speaker 3: Girl groups was pop everywhere, and we just wanted to

276
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Speaker 3: be like them, and we just loved singing so much.

277
00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,720
Speaker 3: So yeah, it was always me and my two sisters,

278
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,720
Speaker 3: Twin and Sophie, So Jazz and Sophie and the three

279
00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:03,559
Speaker 3: of us we just determined because we had already started

280
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Speaker 3: out making songs. Actually, we were signed in Germany when

281
00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:11,880
Speaker 3: I was fifteen to a record label BMG, and we've

282
00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:14,760
Speaker 3: had a lot of experience, you know, being in the

283
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:17,960
Speaker 3: music industry, just never in America. That sounded like such

284
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Speaker 3: a dream so far away.

285
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:22,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you were you were learning about how America

286
00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:23,480
Speaker 1: through television and radio.

287
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:28,040
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, like American just you know, R and B

288
00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:31,440
Speaker 3: music in general wasn't made in Germany. So we were like,

289
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:34,000
Speaker 3: if we want to make that kind of music, we

290
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:37,040
Speaker 3: have to go to America. But that still sounded so

291
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:40,880
Speaker 3: like impossible. It was like, there's a lot of people

292
00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,280
Speaker 3: in America, nobody does that.

293
00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:44,160
Speaker 1: Did a lot of people in Germany look like you?

294
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Speaker 1: Because when I imagine Germany, I imagine, now this is

295
00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:50,120
Speaker 1: my ignorance speaking, but I would imagine more white, and

296
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:52,000
Speaker 1: I absolutely grew up.

297
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:55,560
Speaker 3: With mostly white, like around white people. Yeah, it was

298
00:13:55,679 --> 00:13:58,000
Speaker 3: we were the outsiders. And that's also one reason why

299
00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:01,160
Speaker 3: I never felt home there, never felt like I belonged there.

300
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,720
Speaker 3: I don't know if my sisters also felt it, but

301
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:04,560
Speaker 3: I can imagine.

302
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,280
Speaker 4: I mean I just always felt like this is not

303
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:07,920
Speaker 4: where I belong.

304
00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:10,040
Speaker 2: Are you? Are you mixed or are you?

305
00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:10,360
Speaker 6: Yes?

306
00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,240
Speaker 2: My mom's white? Oh, your mom's white.

307
00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:18,200
Speaker 4: Dad is African Senegalese. Okay, Okay, So yeah, we were

308
00:14:18,679 --> 00:14:21,600
Speaker 4: the different ones, you know, because we didn't.

309
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,640
Speaker 2: Look like everybody else.

310
00:14:22,760 --> 00:14:25,720
Speaker 3: I mean, now, you know, times have changed, like twenty

311
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:30,240
Speaker 3: plus years later, like there is it's more multicultural in

312
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:33,160
Speaker 3: Germany in general, But when I was young and in school.

313
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:36,320
Speaker 3: There was maybe one other kid that was like had

314
00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:37,640
Speaker 3: a black parent or something.

315
00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:41,720
Speaker 1: But when your dad left you were eight, You said,

316
00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:43,800
Speaker 1: what was going on at the time?

317
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:44,600
Speaker 2: What made him leave?

318
00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:50,000
Speaker 3: You know that just you know, he's an African African

319
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:52,840
Speaker 3: man and he he was just cheating on my mom

320
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:56,280
Speaker 3: obviously the whole time, and my mom was just not

321
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,640
Speaker 3: happy with him, and she stayed with him for way

322
00:14:59,640 --> 00:15:01,840
Speaker 3: too long because of us, like so many women do

323
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:03,600
Speaker 3: because of the children.

324
00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:07,640
Speaker 2: You stay together. But he was not treating my mom good.

325
00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:11,320
Speaker 3: Like we experienced some stuff like where it's like, oh,

326
00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:13,120
Speaker 3: you would never want to talk to your dad again,

327
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:16,720
Speaker 3: like you know, just physical you know, domestic abuse and.

328
00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:18,280
Speaker 4: Things like that, and we would witness it.

329
00:15:18,320 --> 00:15:22,200
Speaker 3: And I just remember one moment, especially where he hit

330
00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:25,440
Speaker 3: my mom so hard that she fell on top of us.

331
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:27,280
Speaker 4: I don't know, I think I was.

332
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,080
Speaker 3: I was probably eight because it was around the time

333
00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:32,760
Speaker 3: that she left, And from that moment on, I was

334
00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:33,480
Speaker 3: just so scared of.

335
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:35,160
Speaker 2: Him, just scared, scared, scared.

336
00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:51,960
Speaker 3: One of the crazy part is I was his favorite child,

337
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:55,240
Speaker 3: so he always wanted me next to him, especially during

338
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:57,560
Speaker 3: the phase where he felt like my mom is going

339
00:15:57,600 --> 00:16:00,680
Speaker 3: to leave him. He was holding on to me always Amy.

340
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:02,760
Speaker 3: He called me Ami. You know, my name's Amina, but

341
00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:05,680
Speaker 3: to him I was Ami Ami. He comes it with me,

342
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:09,720
Speaker 3: and it was like he wasn't like mean saying in

343
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,600
Speaker 3: the mean way. It was like I love you, I

344
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,440
Speaker 3: want you with me, like you know, things are bad

345
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:16,280
Speaker 3: right now. He wouldn't talk like that, but that's what

346
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:19,400
Speaker 3: I remember thinking in my head, like I just need

347
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:21,800
Speaker 3: you right now because you.

348
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:23,600
Speaker 2: Know, Yeah, my mom was trying to leave.

349
00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:27,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, so hey ended up she ended up, Oh my god,

350
00:16:27,440 --> 00:16:29,920
Speaker 4: I'm burning this. Ah it doesn't look burn No, it's

351
00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:30,320
Speaker 4: not burned.

352
00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:31,320
Speaker 2: Okay, good for good.

353
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:34,240
Speaker 3: See this this always takes a little longer when you

354
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:36,280
Speaker 3: have at the stove on. But yeah, and so then

355
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,480
Speaker 3: my mom ended up getting my dad out a year later.

356
00:16:39,560 --> 00:16:42,200
Speaker 3: Took like almost a year, felt like eternity that he

357
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:45,680
Speaker 3: was still in the house refusing to leave.

358
00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:47,960
Speaker 2: But he was cheating though.

359
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:49,000
Speaker 4: He was, Yeah he was.

360
00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:52,840
Speaker 3: And he was like telling my mom things like why

361
00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:55,720
Speaker 3: are you worried about that? I always come back to you.

362
00:16:56,040 --> 00:17:01,080
Speaker 3: Yeah you know yeah that men say it not every mine.

363
00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:05,200
Speaker 1: When you when you went to New York, how soon

364
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:08,000
Speaker 1: was it before or how soon after you moved to

365
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:11,040
Speaker 1: New York. Did you end up aligning with love and

366
00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:11,560
Speaker 1: hip hop?

367
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,280
Speaker 4: Ooh, way, way, way, way later.

368
00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:19,159
Speaker 3: So the first and my first fifteen years in New

369
00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:21,879
Speaker 3: York were just you know, on the grind, trying to

370
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:23,960
Speaker 3: make it in music, me and my sisters.

371
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,200
Speaker 2: You said, first fifteen years.

372
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:28,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, or like at least let's say ten Okay, Yeah,

373
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,440
Speaker 3: I'm totally dripping ten years. So from two thousand and

374
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:35,199
Speaker 3: two to twenty twelve, me and my sisters were just

375
00:17:35,320 --> 00:17:36,840
Speaker 3: like trying, you.

376
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:37,640
Speaker 2: Know, always.

377
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:39,879
Speaker 4: Making music together.

378
00:17:40,440 --> 00:17:42,960
Speaker 3: Got signed to diff GM Records in two thousand and five,

379
00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:45,760
Speaker 3: two thousand and six, then you know, we got dropped

380
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,040
Speaker 3: from the label. Then we got signed again, just me

381
00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:48,560
Speaker 3: and my twin.

382
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:52,720
Speaker 2: What made them drop, you guys.

383
00:17:52,359 --> 00:17:53,560
Speaker 4: A lot of reasons.

384
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:56,240
Speaker 3: This is ready by the way, you just need to

385
00:17:56,240 --> 00:18:00,840
Speaker 3: send him in on it. But they actually we didn't

386
00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,119
Speaker 3: get didn't get dropped from Gestion. It was like we

387
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:05,960
Speaker 3: asked to be released from the label because they were

388
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,200
Speaker 3: just holding us hostage.

389
00:18:07,359 --> 00:18:09,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know.

390
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:16,280
Speaker 4: That, okay, friend, not mess up here.

391
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:20,120
Speaker 3: So we were just not Our album never came out,

392
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:20,920
Speaker 3: and we were signed.

393
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:25,120
Speaker 4: We get signed the same year that Chris Neo Arehanna.

394
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was gonna say that was the air that year.

395
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:30,520
Speaker 3: When nobody knew who they were and of them, and

396
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,160
Speaker 3: we actually did a lot of showcases with them, with Neo,

397
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,520
Speaker 3: Rihanna and Chris and we did like small little radio

398
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:40,240
Speaker 3: tours throughout the nations and we.

399
00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:42,119
Speaker 4: Were all new artists. And then Black Butterfly was kind

400
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:47,000
Speaker 4: of the only group, our group that didn't really get

401
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:47,720
Speaker 4: that big break.

402
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:48,880
Speaker 2: You know, they all blew up.

403
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, had big but they were putting a lot into

404
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,520
Speaker 1: them because I remember at that time I owned a

405
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,240
Speaker 1: magazine and they were like pushing Neo pushing.

406
00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,960
Speaker 3: We felt that way, you know, aren't they They're forgetting

407
00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:04,000
Speaker 3: about us, right, you know, they would probably disagree and

408
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 3: say other things.

409
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,760
Speaker 4: There's a lot of politics involved.

410
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:07,680
Speaker 2: It was also.

411
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:11,199
Speaker 3: Because we were signed to a joint venture label with

412
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:14,800
Speaker 3: Russell Simmons and La Reid involved, and everybody had different

413
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:17,600
Speaker 3: opinions on what type of group we should be. Russell

414
00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:20,000
Speaker 3: Simmons wanted us to be more urban and hip hop,

415
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,359
Speaker 3: and La Reid wanted us to be a big pop group,

416
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:25,920
Speaker 3: and so then he kind of like let let Russell

417
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,919
Speaker 3: kind of decide what direction he would take us in.

418
00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:31,080
Speaker 3: So we ended up putting out the song called bad

419
00:19:31,119 --> 00:19:35,320
Speaker 3: Girl with Fabulous and actually before that came Rockabye. It

420
00:19:35,359 --> 00:19:37,960
Speaker 3: was our first single on Deaf Jam and it was

421
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:40,160
Speaker 3: it was a good little run, like it was played

422
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:42,360
Speaker 3: on the radio, like we were so excited. We were,

423
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:45,639
Speaker 3: you know, thinking this could possibly blow up like crazy,

424
00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:48,720
Speaker 3: and it did to a certain level, but it never became.

425
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,120
Speaker 1: And what was your pockets looked like at the time,

426
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,640
Speaker 1: So you were you were playing on radio, but you're

427
00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:55,359
Speaker 1: still I'm.

428
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:59,080
Speaker 3: Telling you, I was a broker, being signed to a

429
00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:02,639
Speaker 3: major label then being just on the grind by myself,

430
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:05,320
Speaker 3: and people always think, oh, he signed to a label,

431
00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:07,919
Speaker 3: you know, and I mean you get an advance, but

432
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,120
Speaker 3: that maybe our advance at the time wasn't a lot

433
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,719
Speaker 3: and it lasted maybe six months, and then after that

434
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:15,760
Speaker 3: you still signed for two three more years.

435
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:20,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, not making money.

436
00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:23,040
Speaker 3: So we were broke a lot while being signed to

437
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:23,879
Speaker 3: major record labels.

438
00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I heard Pink was like that, like

439
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:28,359
Speaker 1: at some point she went broken. She was pumping gas

440
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,399
Speaker 1: and they I think La Read ended up being like, no,

441
00:20:30,480 --> 00:20:33,199
Speaker 1: we gotta pull her off the street. She was just like, well,

442
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:36,240
Speaker 1: you ain't give me money. I'm a survive exactly.

443
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,680
Speaker 3: We were, you know, it wasn't the death Grim deal.

444
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,359
Speaker 3: But I remember after the Deaf Grim deal, we got

445
00:20:40,359 --> 00:20:42,600
Speaker 3: signed to Jay Records. Me and my twin our oldest

446
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,959
Speaker 3: sister had left the group at this point, but we

447
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:49,560
Speaker 3: were signed at J Records, and every month we were like.

448
00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:50,600
Speaker 2: Who's going to make the call?

449
00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:53,160
Speaker 3: We always had to call our you know that we

450
00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:57,399
Speaker 3: were signed to Projection Slash Management under Jay Records, So

451
00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:01,040
Speaker 3: every month we would be like, who's gonna call and ask.

452
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:03,160
Speaker 2: For the rent money? It always had to be one

453
00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:05,040
Speaker 2: of us like and asked for the rent.

454
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:05,360
Speaker 6: Yeah.

455
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,440
Speaker 4: And then we ended up getting evicted too in Brooklyn,

456
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:10,240
Speaker 4: New York. We ended up getting.

457
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,240
Speaker 1: Evictad So why was the deal built like that where

458
00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:14,280
Speaker 1: they were just giving you a check for your rent?

459
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:17,000
Speaker 3: They gave us a check in the beginning of when

460
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:21,480
Speaker 3: you signed the yeah record your minimum guarantee and then

461
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:25,639
Speaker 3: you get some money. It was I don't even remember

462
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:27,600
Speaker 3: the amount, but it wasn't a big advance.

463
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:29,840
Speaker 4: I mean, now they took on a million dollar advances

464
00:21:29,880 --> 00:21:30,359
Speaker 4: and things like that.

465
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:31,680
Speaker 2: We never had that. Yeah.

466
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:35,600
Speaker 3: So our advance, like I said, after like about six

467
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,679
Speaker 3: months maybe a year, ran out and we had nothing

468
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:44,480
Speaker 3: and we were yet we were signed, working on albums

469
00:21:44,520 --> 00:21:48,040
Speaker 3: and flying out here to La to record with Tank

470
00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:48,919
Speaker 3: and different people.

471
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,800
Speaker 4: But you know, we were literally.

472
00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:54,080
Speaker 3: Signed for three years just recording and they never had

473
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:55,960
Speaker 3: seemed to have a plan to release her.

474
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,480
Speaker 1: So then you guys got released. You're smart enough to

475
00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:01,760
Speaker 1: get released. Now what were you working any side hustles

476
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,040
Speaker 1: while all this is going on or yeah.

477
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:06,760
Speaker 4: So eventually, you know, we were like, Okay, we gotta

478
00:22:06,800 --> 00:22:11,359
Speaker 4: do something. We gotta pay our bills. And you know,

479
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:13,520
Speaker 4: we were living in a small railroad.

480
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 3: Apartment in green Point, Brooklyn, very small three of us.

481
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:19,760
Speaker 3: It was me, my twin sister, and our one of

482
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:21,560
Speaker 3: our best friends that we grew up in Germany with

483
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:23,639
Speaker 3: Esther is her name, and she was kind of like

484
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:24,480
Speaker 3: our personal.

485
00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:25,959
Speaker 2: Want.

486
00:22:26,600 --> 00:22:29,159
Speaker 3: Yeah I don't turn it off. So she was like

487
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:33,000
Speaker 3: our personal manager whom made best friend. And so it

488
00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:36,000
Speaker 3: was the three of us living there and that was

489
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:37,520
Speaker 3: the time when we always had to ask for.

490
00:22:37,480 --> 00:22:38,840
Speaker 2: The rent and we were signed.

491
00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:42,520
Speaker 3: It was just so crazy, and I just even remember

492
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:46,760
Speaker 3: one moment that sticks out that was so crazy because

493
00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:50,879
Speaker 3: we would be around like Russell Simmons and jay Z

494
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,520
Speaker 3: and all the people like we would go to these

495
00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,320
Speaker 3: major events, be next to the biggest you know, the

496
00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:00,520
Speaker 3: biggest stars all the time, just in these one side

497
00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:02,360
Speaker 3: of our world was that, and then we would come

498
00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:06,399
Speaker 3: home and have nothing like and it was so just

499
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:09,159
Speaker 3: I don't even know what word I want to say.

500
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:10,800
Speaker 3: It was just so weird. And we would even go

501
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:12,680
Speaker 3: to like Russell Simmons's house he was married to kimoor

502
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:13,840
Speaker 3: Lie Simmons at the time.

503
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:15,920
Speaker 2: They had a golden toilet.

504
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 3: And I just it's just like little things that you remember, right,

505
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 3: So the golden toilet on one side, and then you

506
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:26,119
Speaker 3: come home and you don't have money to buy a

507
00:23:26,160 --> 00:23:26,800
Speaker 3: toilet paper.

508
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:31,640
Speaker 1: Yes, wow, yeah, that's uh. I remember when I was struggling.

509
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:34,159
Speaker 1: I would always have this thing. It'd be like, uh,

510
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:36,200
Speaker 1: you'd either have a car, or you'd have.

511
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:37,160
Speaker 2: No gas money or something.

512
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:38,919
Speaker 1: It was always like it was like you had the car,

513
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:40,760
Speaker 1: but you didn't have the gas money, or you had

514
00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,399
Speaker 1: the gas buddy, but you didn't have the car. And

515
00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:44,439
Speaker 1: I feel like that's kind of what you're saying. You're like,

516
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:49,040
Speaker 1: I couldn't even afford the toilet paper. So what did

517
00:23:49,080 --> 00:23:50,920
Speaker 1: you guys do to survive those types? Did you guys

518
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:51,679
Speaker 1: take out jobs?

519
00:23:52,359 --> 00:23:54,000
Speaker 2: I ended up taking a job.

520
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 3: And then you know, at that point we had already

521
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,719
Speaker 3: been signed again for three years and nothing was happening.

522
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:01,800
Speaker 3: We were like, okay, we were learning that being signed

523
00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:04,840
Speaker 3: really doesn't mean any day that you have money or

524
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:06,200
Speaker 3: that you're going to make it.

525
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:06,760
Speaker 2: It doesn't.

526
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:11,120
Speaker 3: It just means that somebody decided to maybe even sign

527
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:11,600
Speaker 3: you as a.

528
00:24:11,520 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 4: Text writer whatever in the case.

529
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:15,000
Speaker 2: Like, you know, you were just signed and.

530
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,280
Speaker 4: You are put to work.

531
00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:21,680
Speaker 3: But at the same time, I found myself so much

532
00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:25,120
Speaker 3: just working on myself. That's why, you know, I'm thankful

533
00:24:25,359 --> 00:24:28,639
Speaker 3: for it going that way, because it made me just

534
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:32,920
Speaker 3: work on myself more. But yeah, we were broke and

535
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:35,919
Speaker 3: I ended up going on Craigslist and finding a job

536
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:41,199
Speaker 3: as a singer. I was determined to not find a

537
00:24:41,280 --> 00:24:43,800
Speaker 3: job like a regular job or something I hate. I

538
00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 3: wanted to do something I love. I would go on Craigslist,

539
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:49,199
Speaker 3: like look for singer jobs, okay, And then so I

540
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:53,760
Speaker 3: ended up finding the job that I then did for

541
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 3: like four years, right before Love and Hip Hop. I

542
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 3: also met Peter Gans at this job, my baby dad

543
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:05,280
Speaker 3: and her ex husband. So I worked at the Village

544
00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:07,120
Speaker 3: Underground in New York as a singer in the band.

545
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:11,680
Speaker 3: He hired me immediately. The owner Noam Dorman's shout out

546
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:13,640
Speaker 3: to he was amazing. He helped me so much, and

547
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:18,159
Speaker 3: you know, I kind of a new era began for me.

548
00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,879
Speaker 3: And that's kind of when the group with my sister

549
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:24,280
Speaker 3: kind of faded out a little bit, because now I

550
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:27,159
Speaker 3: was busy with something just for me, you know, I

551
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,560
Speaker 3: was busy with other things that something that was fun

552
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:30,840
Speaker 3: for me, making me money.

553
00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:32,720
Speaker 2: It was like almost like.

554
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:36,400
Speaker 3: It was like school for me in a way, because

555
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:39,040
Speaker 3: I learned being on stage. You know, all these years

556
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:41,600
Speaker 3: being signed, we didn't perform much.

557
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,600
Speaker 2: We didn't really guys are just in the studio. We

558
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:45,360
Speaker 2: were Yeah, and when you were in the room.

559
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,680
Speaker 1: With these celebrities like Russell and Jay, did you how

560
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:50,960
Speaker 1: were you able? Were you able to even maximize or

561
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:53,399
Speaker 1: did you feel like imposter syndrome where like maybe you

562
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 1: didn't belong so you were just happy to be in

563
00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:55,640
Speaker 1: the room.

564
00:25:56,359 --> 00:25:58,199
Speaker 3: I mean we were always happy to Like you know,

565
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:01,639
Speaker 3: once you've come into a big deaf DYM office and

566
00:26:01,640 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 3: you see your own picture big, like on the biggest

567
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,440
Speaker 3: wall inside there, like on the twenty eighth floor.

568
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,919
Speaker 4: I remember we coming up there and it's us like

569
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:10,560
Speaker 4: everybody believed.

570
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:13,080
Speaker 3: It seemed like everybody believed that Black Butterfly was going

571
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:15,280
Speaker 3: to be the next, you know, big thing, and then

572
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,040
Speaker 3: it just doesn't happen that way. Everybody's looking at like

573
00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:24,080
Speaker 3: who's to blame? Right, Yeah, And I just remember like

574
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:28,080
Speaker 3: that one when we dropped our second single, because the

575
00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 3: album ever came out, but when we dropped our single single,

576
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:33,959
Speaker 3: like we went into Jay Z's office one time because

577
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:37,840
Speaker 3: apparently he asked to see Black Butterfly, and so we

578
00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:39,840
Speaker 3: went in there and he gave a great advice to

579
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 3: me that I always I keep mentioning it because it

580
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,959
Speaker 3: was just great, like he just wanted to know how

581
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:49,159
Speaker 3: we feel about, you know, everything that was going on

582
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,360
Speaker 3: at the label. And at the time, I was kind

583
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 3: of like feeling a little like a puppet, like they

584
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:57,440
Speaker 3: were just telling me what to do and I was

585
00:26:57,520 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 3: just doing it, but I wasn't really happy.

586
00:26:59,320 --> 00:27:01,280
Speaker 4: And I feel like a lot of artists.

587
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 1: That Neil expressed that if you ever watched his interview,

588
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 1: I mean this first record, Yeah, yeah.

589
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,840
Speaker 3: It was like they tell you what to do, if

590
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:14,439
Speaker 3: you have anything to say against it, you're hard to

591
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:14,880
Speaker 3: deal with.

592
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:16,399
Speaker 4: You don't listen.

593
00:27:16,880 --> 00:27:18,760
Speaker 3: And we tried to just be quiet and just do

594
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,720
Speaker 3: what they say. But yet everyone was telling us to

595
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 3: do something different. So this person was saying, just just

596
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:28,159
Speaker 3: just do what you're being asked to do, just you know,

597
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:29,919
Speaker 3: and then the next person would say, like jay Z

598
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 3: in this moment, he was like, you gotta be more

599
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 3: like Kanye and stand up for what you want. You

600
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,639
Speaker 3: can't put anything out there that you don't believe in.

601
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,360
Speaker 3: I loved it because I felt that I was like, yeah,

602
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 3: but how we supposed to do that?

603
00:27:40,640 --> 00:27:45,159
Speaker 2: We know what year was this, Kanye? But Kanye was

604
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,640
Speaker 2: it out? You well, he was out.

605
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,520
Speaker 1: He was just wait, wait, Kanye, don't start to drop.

606
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:51,959
Speaker 1: He's dropped in two thousand.

607
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:53,720
Speaker 4: He was already.

608
00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:55,480
Speaker 2: I mean, people knew of him, but he wasn't Like.

609
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:58,919
Speaker 1: When did the college drop out come out? I don't remember,

610
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,919
Speaker 1: but so you're he was like, be like, be very

611
00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 1: vocal about what you want. But it's interested that Jay

612
00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:05,920
Speaker 1: would say that I have a huge jay Z fan.

613
00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:07,639
Speaker 2: There's a huge jay Z paint again by lobby.

614
00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:12,639
Speaker 1: But I will say this, it's easier for a man,

615
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:15,720
Speaker 1: in my opinion, you could correct me to speak up

616
00:28:15,880 --> 00:28:18,800
Speaker 1: in this male dominated industry than a woman. Because if

617
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:20,720
Speaker 1: you would have came in that room and said, yeah, Jay,

618
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:24,480
Speaker 1: I'm the shakes. If you ain't nothing, what would what

619
00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:26,040
Speaker 1: do you think they would have said? And I'm not

620
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:29,119
Speaker 1: gonna say Jay because Jay's you know, my favorite, But

621
00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:31,879
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, like, in your position, did you feel

622
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,359
Speaker 1: like as a woman you could be like yay.

623
00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 2: No.

624
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 3: That's why I felt like it was so contradicting because

625
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 3: I loved what he was saying. I was like, yeah,

626
00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:41,880
Speaker 3: I want to be more like that, but they're not

627
00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 3: letting us.

628
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,280
Speaker 2: Like if we do that, then we're being called.

629
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:48,720
Speaker 3: This and that, and like it was like a heart

630
00:28:48,760 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 3: It was totally. It was stressful being fine. You always

631
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,520
Speaker 3: try to please everyone else, and especially.

632
00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 1: When you're young, because you're like, I don't want to

633
00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:58,960
Speaker 1: blow this. I'm like that with the black effects. Sometimes

634
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't want to mess up, and then

635
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:03,920
Speaker 1: all of a sudden they realize I'm not that great

636
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 1: yep or whatever. But I'm just gonna I want to

637
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,600
Speaker 1: try this past before.

638
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 3: I get cold, exactly. You know, my first it might

639
00:29:11,960 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 3: need sugar on top. I put sugar on top. Let

640
00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:17,120
Speaker 3: me see if I put enough sugar, it's probably not sweet.

641
00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,120
Speaker 2: There's enough sugar in it.

642
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

643
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:23,120
Speaker 2: Really you want a sweeter you know where did you syrup?

644
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:24,720
Speaker 2: You can?

645
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 3: I'm not I used to eat it just like this,

646
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:30,440
Speaker 3: more cinnamon and sugar, like just sprinkle some on top

647
00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 3: and it's like, you know, the only difference really is

648
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,640
Speaker 3: because you can use syrup, is that it's not fluffy

649
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 3: and it's more like a crape.

650
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:44,880
Speaker 2: I'm not a huge fan of grapes. Boom. If I

651
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:47,720
Speaker 2: choose between this and a crape, I would choose this.

652
00:29:49,560 --> 00:29:49,680
Speaker 3: Mm.

653
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:54,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is Philly. It's missing sugar, but mmm.

654
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:58,080
Speaker 4: I normally don't like sweet suff but this has to

655
00:29:58,120 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 4: be a little sweeter.

656
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 2: Well the sugar and chocolate. Yeah, I think it's fine

657
00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:07,520
Speaker 2: with just sugar. Yeah. This is not considered vegan right.

658
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 3: Now because it you know, it has milk egg.

659
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:11,760
Speaker 4: It's probably the opposite of vegan.

660
00:30:11,840 --> 00:30:17,120
Speaker 2: I'll be honest. This is it's not bad. Yeah, this

661
00:30:17,320 --> 00:30:17,840
Speaker 2: is not bad.

662
00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 1: This is almost like it reminds me of like corn meal.

663
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 1: But it's a pancake, doesn't it.

664
00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:27,360
Speaker 3: In contrast with the apples and olds, it's like this

665
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:28,040
Speaker 3: is more fillings.

666
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:29,360
Speaker 2: Eat these together.

667
00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would make both of it like most like

668
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:35,840
Speaker 3: a lot of days. This would be my breakfast like

669
00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:39,040
Speaker 3: this that both together, we can eat breakfast together.

670
00:30:39,160 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 2: Just add a little add a little bacon, We're good.

671
00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 4: Ah yeah, yeah.

672
00:30:43,360 --> 00:30:47,200
Speaker 3: I've never been a big you know, meat for breakfast either, but.

673
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:51,240
Speaker 4: I feel like it just needs like something salty, salty

674
00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:51,720
Speaker 4: on that.

675
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 2: No, like oh, apple, the pancake like you just right, No,

676
00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:57,000
Speaker 2: you're right.

677
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 3: You can definitely have like sausage with it or something,

678
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 3: and if you wanted to, you could put the apples

679
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 3: and on top of this.

680
00:31:04,240 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 2: Yep, that would be I think that's that would be

681
00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:07,240
Speaker 2: how I do it.

682
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 6: Well.

683
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:11,240
Speaker 4: I used to always eat this also with apple sauce.

684
00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:15,240
Speaker 4: That's also good. That's how it. Yeah, this is great.

685
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:19,200
Speaker 1: It's feeling affordable, and I liked that most of the

686
00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:20,720
Speaker 1: ingredients are typically in your house.

687
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:24,640
Speaker 3: That's what made me start eating it so much because

688
00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:26,080
Speaker 3: we always had flour.

689
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:28,760
Speaker 2: How hard was it for you to come up with

690
00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:33,600
Speaker 2: a dish for today's show? Not so hard.

691
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 3: It just this stuck out because I remember the times,

692
00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 3: you know, the times in Brooklyn when we were trying

693
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:46,240
Speaker 3: to live on a budget and not having much money,

694
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 3: and then growing up in Germany and my mom always

695
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 3: making it for us, so it stuck out.

696
00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:54,680
Speaker 4: It's stuck out. And you know what's crazy? This recipes

697
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:56,200
Speaker 4: in my I have a cookbook.

698
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:57,040
Speaker 2: And this is in it.

699
00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 1: Oh, speaking of cookbooks, this will be added to the

700
00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:03,280
Speaker 1: Eating Well Broke Cookbook as your dish. This will be

701
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:05,479
Speaker 1: so it will be in your cookbook, but we are

702
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:07,800
Speaker 1: going to be adding it as your signature disc along

703
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,800
Speaker 1: with a bunch of other dishes that people a when

704
00:32:10,840 --> 00:32:15,880
Speaker 1: you're broke. I should probably tell you that sooner, but

705
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:18,880
Speaker 1: hopefully you'll be okay with it being in the book.

706
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 2: So yeah, I'm okay with it now.

707
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:27,920
Speaker 1: Now that you've fed me amazingly well on budget, after

708
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:35,479
Speaker 1: experiencing your record label fiascos in your music industry, you

709
00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 1: start working at this club. Yes, this is where you

710
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:41,760
Speaker 1: meet your future ex husband.

711
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 2: Yes, I don't know.

712
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:46,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, And so tell me is that kind of

713
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 1: where where did love and hip hop and Peter Gunns

714
00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 1: come and change the traje?

715
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:51,000
Speaker 2: Yeah?

716
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 3: You know, first of all, like I was so blooming

717
00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 3: at the time because I didn't realize how unhappy I

718
00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,440
Speaker 3: really was in these record deals. That one I was

719
00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:02,280
Speaker 3: actually doing what I love, which is singing on a

720
00:33:02,320 --> 00:33:05,160
Speaker 3: stage every single night, like and making money.

721
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:07,600
Speaker 4: That it was.

722
00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:11,440
Speaker 3: Really like making me, giving me so much excitement just

723
00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:12,800
Speaker 3: every day, like going to work.

724
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:13,400
Speaker 2: I loved it.

725
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:17,040
Speaker 3: I loved working there and singing, and I was around

726
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:20,800
Speaker 3: the greatest musicians like you could imagine. And apparently someone

727
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,040
Speaker 3: named Peter Guns also loved that scene, that live music

728
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 3: scene in New York. He would just be there and

729
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:28,480
Speaker 3: hang out every night, and everybody knew who he was.

730
00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 3: And I just remember he was always standing by the

731
00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:36,520
Speaker 3: entrance of the club with shades on, and I would

732
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:39,560
Speaker 3: just be like, why you're wearing shades in this dark club?

733
00:33:39,680 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 3: Like I thought it was kind of like weird, but yeah,

734
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,920
Speaker 3: we You know, it took a couple of years for

735
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,400
Speaker 3: him and I to connect because even at the in

736
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 3: the beginning of me working there, I had a boyfriend,

737
00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:55,240
Speaker 3: one of the guys in the band.

738
00:33:55,440 --> 00:33:57,120
Speaker 4: I was with him for like a year and a half.

739
00:33:58,040 --> 00:34:00,120
Speaker 3: He was also friends with Peter Guns, and we were

740
00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:03,080
Speaker 3: all just a big family and everybody knew, you know,

741
00:34:03,960 --> 00:34:06,600
Speaker 3: everybody was like friends with everybody, and it was like

742
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:13,680
Speaker 3: kind of organically started like hanging out with Peter in

743
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:14,240
Speaker 3: a group.

744
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:15,319
Speaker 4: Yeah.

745
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:19,040
Speaker 3: Like so then when I broke up with my then boyfriend,

746
00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 3: Peter had already kind of been a friend, yeah along,

747
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:24,560
Speaker 3: you know, we had hung out a bunch of times,

748
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:26,760
Speaker 3: but I never looked at him like I like him.

749
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:28,120
Speaker 4: Yeah oh like.

750
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 3: That's that's why it was so weird that it happened

751
00:34:30,880 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 3: the way it did, because I I would in the

752
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 3: beginning of the first two years, I would look at Peter

753
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:40,320
Speaker 3: like yeah, yeah, okay, Like first of all, he always

754
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:44,879
Speaker 3: got different women like Superwoman, like not my not my thing.

755
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:48,440
Speaker 3: But then you know, as I get to know him,

756
00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:51,080
Speaker 3: we just became really cool friends. And that's what I

757
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:55,279
Speaker 3: always say. Me and Peter started as friends, and I

758
00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:59,200
Speaker 3: just knowing or seeing how he moves with women never

759
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:02,080
Speaker 3: really made me interest, didn't anything else but just being

760
00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:05,440
Speaker 3: friends with him. However, that that didn't work out like

761
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 3: that because we ended.

762
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 2: Up Actually how did that happen? You guys?

763
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:32,680
Speaker 1: So yeah, y'all fell in love and then how did

764
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:34,200
Speaker 1: love and hip hop end up in that?

765
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:35,080
Speaker 2: You know what?

766
00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:36,200
Speaker 4: It was a timing thing.

767
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:42,480
Speaker 3: Me and Peter probably had like dated for about almost

768
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:48,000
Speaker 3: six months, and one of his friends was Rich Dollars,

769
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 3: who already was on Love and Hip Hop. So me

770
00:35:50,719 --> 00:35:52,440
Speaker 3: and Peter would always hang out and do fun stuff.

771
00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:55,279
Speaker 3: We would go to the parks and we would go

772
00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:57,920
Speaker 3: to the movies and just do fun things. And one

773
00:35:57,960 --> 00:35:59,640
Speaker 3: day he was like, let's go buy this set my

774
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 3: boys filming. So we went by the set, like you know,

775
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,319
Speaker 3: they were filming love and hip Hop and he was

776
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:10,440
Speaker 3: just doing a kind of a cameo sitting in at dinner.

777
00:36:10,520 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 3: It was like a dinner scene and I was just

778
00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:16,120
Speaker 3: there watching. I was not involved. But that's the night

779
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:21,360
Speaker 3: that it all started, because you know, the producers started

780
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:25,800
Speaker 3: talking to Peter. He's once he said, this is a

781
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 3: meaning my wife, but I got a girlfriend.

782
00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:32,120
Speaker 4: Two The producers were like, the next day, I got

783
00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:32,399
Speaker 4: a call.

784
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:35,120
Speaker 2: But wait, so you guys were dating a couple months

785
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:35,919
Speaker 2: and you guys got married.

786
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:38,200
Speaker 4: We got married after dating for like six months.

787
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:43,719
Speaker 3: So we started dating summer of twenty twelve. We get

788
00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:46,000
Speaker 3: married February twenty thirteen.

789
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: But he said he has a wife and a girlfriend.

790
00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: But did you know he had a girlfriend.

791
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:57,480
Speaker 3: I knew that he had Tara, the mother of his sons,

792
00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:00,200
Speaker 3: that he still he was still living with.

793
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:02,600
Speaker 2: Oh, he was still living with He was well married.

794
00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:06,640
Speaker 3: He was still living with Tara, but he said, you know,

795
00:37:07,120 --> 00:37:08,120
Speaker 3: they're not together.

796
00:37:08,480 --> 00:37:11,960
Speaker 2: So so he would sleep at her house, but be like.

797
00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 4: At my house every night.

798
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:17,080
Speaker 3: So he slept me every night with me, maybe one

799
00:37:17,200 --> 00:37:19,320
Speaker 3: night out of the week, he wouldn't so what he

800
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,160
Speaker 3: spend his days with her? He would during the day

801
00:37:22,239 --> 00:37:25,480
Speaker 3: probably be with yeah, with her and then and then he.

802
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:28,319
Speaker 2: Was with me every night, okay, and then and then.

803
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:29,279
Speaker 2: But so you can and I.

804
00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:32,840
Speaker 3: Knew at this point, you know, he didn't break up

805
00:37:32,840 --> 00:37:35,439
Speaker 3: with her yet. That's why I wanted to do love

806
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:37,560
Speaker 3: and hip Hop because I knew if we do love

807
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:41,239
Speaker 3: a hip hop, she will finally know what she needs

808
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 3: to know.

809
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:44,440
Speaker 2: Oh, so she didn't know about you. No, that's the

810
00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:45,120
Speaker 2: fucked up part.

811
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:50,680
Speaker 1: She didn't know about you, because yeah, but why did

812
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 1: he ever tell you why he proposed to you even

813
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:53,640
Speaker 1: though he had a girlfriend?

814
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 3: No, you know, the way we got married, I have

815
00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 3: to say that because it's it's big. The way we

816
00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:02,040
Speaker 3: got married was more like out of desperation, because.

817
00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 4: You know, I always say.

818
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:07,640
Speaker 3: This, like we had a real relationship, we were really

819
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:11,000
Speaker 3: in love. We got married because of love. But we

820
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:14,640
Speaker 3: got married for a reason, and that is because Peter

821
00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:17,440
Speaker 3: didn't want me to go back to Germany. Okay, so

822
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,040
Speaker 3: if it wasn't for that, we would have never gotten married.

823
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:21,600
Speaker 2: Got it, got it? So he wanted it.

824
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:24,880
Speaker 3: Like when people say, oh, fake marriage, you just married

825
00:38:24,960 --> 00:38:28,480
Speaker 3: for the fav that's not true because we were actually

826
00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:32,160
Speaker 3: dating for real, in love, you know, like we were

827
00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:35,760
Speaker 3: not faking a relationship for me to get Obviously obviously

828
00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 3: a lot of people do that.

829
00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:37,799
Speaker 2: My brother did that.

830
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:39,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, he didn't want me to have to go back

831
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:42,000
Speaker 3: to Germany. I was stressed out, and he was like,

832
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:44,279
Speaker 3: I want you here, I want to be with you. You know,

833
00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:45,239
Speaker 3: I would just marry you.

834
00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:46,239
Speaker 2: That was it.

835
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:47,399
Speaker 4: Okay, that's how it went.

836
00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:50,720
Speaker 2: So then, so then is your first time meeting terror

837
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:52,719
Speaker 2: on Love and Hip Hop? Yeah?

838
00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:55,000
Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, no, no, she's gonna hate me

839
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:55,839
Speaker 4: if I say this wrong.

840
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:57,080
Speaker 3: No.

841
00:38:57,360 --> 00:39:00,680
Speaker 4: I met her at the nightclub that I'm peter ed.

842
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:04,719
Speaker 3: However, I didn't know that was his main girlfriend that

843
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:06,520
Speaker 3: has been with him for thirteen years.

844
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:08,719
Speaker 2: Oh wow, So are you guys good friends now?

845
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 3: And we are now years later now we finally had

846
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:13,960
Speaker 3: a place where we talked to each other. We like, yeah,

847
00:39:14,000 --> 00:39:16,080
Speaker 3: I can say I can say the word friend now.

848
00:39:16,120 --> 00:39:18,759
Speaker 3: It took a long time, but we were friends.

849
00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:23,080
Speaker 1: When you look back at that whole situation, do you

850
00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:26,200
Speaker 1: think that. Do you have any regrets on however they

851
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 1: worked out or if they're, if they're if if they're,

852
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:29,040
Speaker 1: if you could.

853
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:30,040
Speaker 2: Go back, what would you change?

854
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,759
Speaker 3: Even though I wasn't the responsible one, I have the

855
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:35,239
Speaker 3: regret that we went into doing Love and Hip Hop

856
00:39:35,360 --> 00:39:38,919
Speaker 3: without tyr or knowing anything. You know, that was definitely wrong,

857
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:40,799
Speaker 3: even though Peter is the one that should have made

858
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:44,640
Speaker 3: sure he doesn't drag her on a show, and you know,

859
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:48,799
Speaker 3: without knowing what, you know, what was really going on.

860
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 2: The producers didn't even prep her for it.

861
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:52,880
Speaker 3: They loved it. They loved that she didn't know. Oh

862
00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:54,520
Speaker 3: my god, you know, they don't care about nothing.

863
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,680
Speaker 2: Now, were you guys making good money at the time

864
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 2: during that show.

865
00:39:57,920 --> 00:39:59,879
Speaker 4: The first season? No, not at all.

866
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:03,120
Speaker 3: It was more like I was, you know, honestly, I

867
00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:04,959
Speaker 3: had two reasons for going on Love and hip Hop.

868
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 3: The main reason was, Okay, finally people are going to

869
00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 3: see me as the artist. You know, Love and hip

870
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:15,520
Speaker 3: Hop is about music. I can finally show case who

871
00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:17,960
Speaker 3: I am. I can play my instruments and millions of

872
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:19,720
Speaker 3: people going to see me. That was my number one reason.

873
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:23,840
Speaker 4: Number two was I was in this situation that wasn't good.

874
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:25,040
Speaker 2: It wasn't comfortable.

875
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:27,920
Speaker 3: I needed you know, Peter was telling me so many lies,

876
00:40:28,480 --> 00:40:30,800
Speaker 3: constantly saying, Oh, I'm gonna tell her, I'm going to

877
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:31,640
Speaker 3: tell her.

878
00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:34,560
Speaker 4: I knew if we did the show, it was finally

879
00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 4: going to come out, and.

880
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 2: That's all I wanted.

881
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:39,160
Speaker 3: I just wanted him to, you know, tell her what

882
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,719
Speaker 3: he did and without loving if we would have never

883
00:40:41,719 --> 00:40:42,840
Speaker 3: did Love and Hip Hop.

884
00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:45,960
Speaker 2: I don't think you would have ever told Tara anything.

885
00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 2: There is himy War is still together?

886
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:53,120
Speaker 3: No, I know from what I know, but I can't say, okay,

887
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 3: but are you still with him? No?

888
00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:57,320
Speaker 4: Oh my god, no, No, we divorced.

889
00:40:57,320 --> 00:40:57,799
Speaker 2: Were you know?

890
00:40:58,040 --> 00:40:58,879
Speaker 4: We not at all?

891
00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 2: Now, you guys were married for how long? Man together?

892
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:04,640
Speaker 4: Three years?

893
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 3: Married for probably six because the divorce took like three years.

894
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:13,600
Speaker 3: But I moved from New York in twenty sixteen, and

895
00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:17,440
Speaker 3: since then, you know, we were done. Like I probably

896
00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:20,640
Speaker 3: was still hooked on him for a little bit of time.

897
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:21,920
Speaker 3: It took me a long time to get over him.

898
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:22,160
Speaker 1: Long.

899
00:41:22,280 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 2: Well, you guys had kids together.

900
00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:25,279
Speaker 4: We had it, yeah, and I was pregnant when I

901
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:26,120
Speaker 4: left two.

902
00:41:26,680 --> 00:41:29,360
Speaker 1: Yes, oh you you left at that time because I

903
00:41:29,400 --> 00:41:31,280
Speaker 1: remember the last time I had seen U on TV.

904
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:33,719
Speaker 1: You had like Tar had said she was pregnant. I

905
00:41:33,719 --> 00:41:36,239
Speaker 1: don't even remember we were pregnant the same time.

906
00:41:36,280 --> 00:41:38,480
Speaker 2: So did she end up having hers? Yeah, So you

907
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:39,680
Speaker 2: guys have kids that are.

908
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,879
Speaker 3: Like same age seven Gunner is seven and Bronx and seven,

909
00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:44,240
Speaker 3: my daughter and her son.

910
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:46,239
Speaker 2: And then the kids. Now you guys are friends, so

911
00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:47,040
Speaker 2: your kids all, oh.

912
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:48,319
Speaker 4: Yeah, there they love each other.

913
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:50,400
Speaker 3: And I'm so happy we were able to come to

914
00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:53,560
Speaker 3: like a place like where we don't blame each other.

915
00:41:53,800 --> 00:41:55,800
Speaker 4: Like, you know, she may still feel some way.

916
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,000
Speaker 3: About what happened back then, but we have like kind

917
00:41:58,000 --> 00:42:01,600
Speaker 3: of forgiven each other and we kind of more relate

918
00:42:01,640 --> 00:42:04,759
Speaker 3: to one another because we were both sold this. You know,

919
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:07,360
Speaker 3: he was kind of like doing the same thing to

920
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,080
Speaker 3: both of us.

921
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,000
Speaker 1: So yeah, I felt like at some point it was like,

922
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:14,719
Speaker 1: even though he was the causer of the mayhem, he

923
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:17,000
Speaker 1: kind of sat back and watched you guys.

924
00:42:17,360 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, he kind of a part of him enjoyed.

925
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:26,080
Speaker 3: I think that, Yeah, I don't know enjoyed, but I

926
00:42:26,239 --> 00:42:27,760
Speaker 3: know that he was helpless.

927
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:29,279
Speaker 2: He did not know what to do.

928
00:42:29,560 --> 00:42:32,040
Speaker 3: He had made this big mess and it was fucked

929
00:42:32,160 --> 00:42:35,319
Speaker 3: up and it was just bad, and it seemed like

930
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:38,239
Speaker 3: the world hated him for it, and he just didn't

931
00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:39,399
Speaker 3: know how to make it right.

932
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:41,400
Speaker 4: It wasn't no making it right. He couldn't make it right.

933
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:43,680
Speaker 2: Now, were you two the only one in the triangle?

934
00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:44,040
Speaker 3: Do you know?

935
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:45,319
Speaker 2: Or were there other women?

936
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 4: I know, I'm I would almost bet on my kids.

937
00:42:50,280 --> 00:42:53,000
Speaker 3: It was Yeah, there was definitely others, but we were

938
00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:53,359
Speaker 3: the main.

939
00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 2: We were the main of the Yeah.

940
00:42:55,040 --> 00:42:58,040
Speaker 3: You know, it displayed on the show and everything, But

941
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:00,160
Speaker 3: he definitely had other you.

942
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:02,080
Speaker 4: Know, while he was living with me, we were living

943
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:02,959
Speaker 4: in Youngers in New York.

944
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:06,880
Speaker 3: I had just had a baby. Obviously he was still

945
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,840
Speaker 3: going between me and Tara. He also had others in

946
00:43:10,880 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 3: the background. I know because I found out some things.

947
00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:15,919
Speaker 4: So yeah, it wasn't just us.

948
00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:18,080
Speaker 1: But but I noticed, You're like, he was living with

949
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 1: you or he was living with Tara?

950
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:20,960
Speaker 2: Did he was he?

951
00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:24,040
Speaker 1: Were you guys always the breadwinners or did he bread

952
00:43:24,080 --> 00:43:24,600
Speaker 1: winding too?

953
00:43:25,360 --> 00:43:25,600
Speaker 6: You know?

954
00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:29,840
Speaker 3: Once we started did Love and Hip Hop for multiple seasons,

955
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:31,640
Speaker 3: we were all kind of in the same boat. Like

956
00:43:31,880 --> 00:43:34,080
Speaker 3: it started being like it just was one of the

957
00:43:34,120 --> 00:43:37,879
Speaker 3: biggest storylines ever. It was, and at the time it

958
00:43:37,960 --> 00:43:41,719
Speaker 3: was also the ratings were crazy because of us and

959
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:44,680
Speaker 3: like definitely, if you talked love and hip hop New York,

960
00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:48,560
Speaker 3: you know, stands out is like what stands out is

961
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:51,799
Speaker 3: obviously Cardi b And then like our stuff. Yeah, like

962
00:43:52,080 --> 00:43:55,319
Speaker 3: at least as far as triangles and love like messiness goes.

963
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:57,520
Speaker 3: I mean that was like when you were watching Nessis

964
00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:01,480
Speaker 3: and that's all you wanted to see. But were you, guys,

965
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,879
Speaker 3: were you was Peter stepping up financially for you guys

966
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:06,800
Speaker 3: or were you guys holding down the fort.

967
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:10,319
Speaker 4: Too where he could? You know, he is a giver.

968
00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:13,600
Speaker 3: He gives, He lives for his kids as far as

969
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:17,439
Speaker 3: like you know, when he got it, his kids are good. Yeah,

970
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:22,520
Speaker 3: but because he has ten children, he's not always in

971
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:26,399
Speaker 3: the best position to like take care of everything. And

972
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 3: even at the time where he was living with me,

973
00:44:29,440 --> 00:44:31,920
Speaker 3: he was also having to help Tower with you know,

974
00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 3: with whatever rent and all that bills, and he was

975
00:44:36,120 --> 00:44:38,960
Speaker 3: not able to cover everything for everybody. So he was

976
00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:40,320
Speaker 3: doing it as much as he could.

977
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 1: But so now as a woman being a single mom providing,

978
00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:49,440
Speaker 1: now the whole world knows you, what are you thinking? Like,

979
00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:52,800
Speaker 1: Like how are you healing and taking care of yourself?

980
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:54,840
Speaker 1: Because I feel like if I was in your shoes.

981
00:44:54,840 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 1: There would be so many conflicting emotions from you know,

982
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:01,879
Speaker 1: outside opinions to how I see myself, how I ended

983
00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:05,360
Speaker 1: up in this position. You know, even you and Tara. Thankfully,

984
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: I'm glad to hear that you guys have this bomber.

985
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:09,759
Speaker 1: You guys can kind of be like, oh, yeah, I

986
00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:11,239
Speaker 1: was kind of a shit show, you know.

987
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:13,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly what it is. I wish more.

988
00:45:13,719 --> 00:45:16,640
Speaker 1: Women kind of like, you know, like when my husband

989
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 1: cheated on me, I wish the side chicks would just

990
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:21,239
Speaker 1: like at least reach out. Yeah, and not in not

991
00:45:21,360 --> 00:45:23,880
Speaker 1: in a vulgar way, but just reach out. And you're like, look,

992
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:27,799
Speaker 1: you know this, dude, Oh boy, it's telling me this.

993
00:45:28,360 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 1: You know, we do have this type of relationship. Do

994
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:33,080
Speaker 1: you want to compare notes? Not like I'm gonna take

995
00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:34,919
Speaker 1: your man or I'm gonna be the side chick, because

996
00:45:34,920 --> 00:45:37,560
Speaker 1: a lot of the side chick the side chicks are like,

997
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:41,680
Speaker 1: I don't know, I feel like there there's confusion and

998
00:45:41,719 --> 00:45:45,080
Speaker 1: the loyalty or I don't know how the side conversations go.

999
00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:47,160
Speaker 2: But a part of me is like, yo, pro sweet

1000
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:48,440
Speaker 2: woman to woman like.

1001
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:52,000
Speaker 3: No, absolutely, and I which is so crazy to say,

1002
00:45:52,239 --> 00:45:54,319
Speaker 3: I was the side chick, but it was also the

1003
00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:57,960
Speaker 3: white Yeah, so it was so weird the position I

1004
00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:00,600
Speaker 3: was in. And I just remember I always wanted to

1005
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:04,480
Speaker 3: do that and he would always somehow stop me. Yeah,

1006
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:06,400
Speaker 3: you know until that scene in Love and Hip of

1007
00:46:06,400 --> 00:46:08,560
Speaker 3: where I was the one that brought her the news,

1008
00:46:08,760 --> 00:46:11,239
Speaker 3: like I because he just wouldn't do it, and he

1009
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 3: kept saying, don't worry, i'll do it, I'll do it,

1010
00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:15,319
Speaker 3: and then he just wouldn't. And at one point I

1011
00:46:15,360 --> 00:46:23,320
Speaker 3: was like, that's it, I will tell her, and oh yes.

1012
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:27,560
Speaker 4: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.

1013
00:46:27,640 --> 00:46:30,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was, especially because we were filming the show.

1014
00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:33,719
Speaker 4: It was on camera, and it was it was just

1015
00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:35,520
Speaker 4: he was like, I wanted to tell her in private.

1016
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:38,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you didn't. Yeah, you never did. You never

1017
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 2: found the time.

1018
00:46:40,640 --> 00:46:44,799
Speaker 1: Well after Loving Hip Hop taped and you moved to La,

1019
00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:48,000
Speaker 1: all right, new beginning life started.

1020
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:49,600
Speaker 2: What was your pockets looking like?

1021
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:51,360
Speaker 4: Fine?

1022
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:53,960
Speaker 3: It was good enough for me to have to worry about.

1023
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:56,319
Speaker 3: Like I was able to get me an apartment, like

1024
00:46:56,400 --> 00:47:00,600
Speaker 3: a nice apartment. I had my car, I had everything

1025
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,040
Speaker 3: I needed. I was pregnant, I had my one year old,

1026
00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 3: and I wasn't concerned about.

1027
00:47:04,800 --> 00:47:05,680
Speaker 2: Oh my God, I got it.

1028
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:07,840
Speaker 3: You know, I gotta make money because I would have

1029
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:10,239
Speaker 3: been good for for some time, like I was good

1030
00:47:10,239 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 3: for about probably it a year before I had to

1031
00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:14,720
Speaker 3: think about a year.

1032
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:17,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, now it's yeah, you.

1033
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:18,600
Speaker 1: Know what a one year old like when I had

1034
00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:21,240
Speaker 1: my baby, Like a year to me of being good

1035
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:24,359
Speaker 1: is still like freak out able, I think, especially because

1036
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 1: if you don't have someone to call and be like, yo,

1037
00:47:26,080 --> 00:47:27,160
Speaker 1: can you cover my rent?

1038
00:47:27,280 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 3: No?

1039
00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:29,680
Speaker 4: Absolutely, it is still freaking out.

1040
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:32,200
Speaker 2: And then if you're pregnant, but you were also still

1041
00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:33,000
Speaker 2: in love too.

1042
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:34,719
Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, I was.

1043
00:47:34,840 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 3: Absolutely it was hard, so it was probably one of

1044
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:38,800
Speaker 3: the heart it was. I always say it's the hardest

1045
00:47:38,840 --> 00:47:41,360
Speaker 3: thing I ever had to do is leave that situation

1046
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:45,279
Speaker 3: alone and leave that man alone and really really let

1047
00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:45,680
Speaker 3: it go.

1048
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 4: Took two years.

1049
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 3: And the thing is, like you said, it is freakoutable

1050
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:52,120
Speaker 3: if you think about it. Okay, I have a year,

1051
00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:54,520
Speaker 3: but then I don't know what's next.

1052
00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:58,040
Speaker 2: And where was your money from love and hip hop? Yeah? Okay.

1053
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 3: The only reason that I wasn't freaking out it's because

1054
00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:02,839
Speaker 3: my whole life has been that way. You know, I

1055
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 3: was used to it. I never knew I was never stable.

1056
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 3: My whole life has been a whole grind, like trying

1057
00:48:08,080 --> 00:48:10,600
Speaker 3: to figure it out. And I have to say even now,

1058
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:13,600
Speaker 3: you know, I'm not ashamed to say, like you still

1059
00:48:13,760 --> 00:48:17,320
Speaker 3: have to figure out what's next. You know, you're trying

1060
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:21,319
Speaker 3: to build up things like and I'm forty now and

1061
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:26,280
Speaker 3: I'm a mom and I'm a single mom, and I

1062
00:48:26,320 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 3: still make my music, which I'm so proud of and

1063
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:31,840
Speaker 3: still so passionate about, but it's not enough.

1064
00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:34,000
Speaker 2: To live the life that I feel like I So

1065
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 2: how do you survive?

1066
00:48:35,239 --> 00:48:35,319
Speaker 6: Like?

1067
00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:36,040
Speaker 2: Work wise?

1068
00:48:36,080 --> 00:48:37,840
Speaker 4: Are you?

1069
00:48:37,840 --> 00:48:40,120
Speaker 3: You know, I have a couple of different things, like

1070
00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:45,000
Speaker 3: a few different things that I'm also doing some fitness,

1071
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:49,280
Speaker 3: like I'm studying to the yoga instructor. I'm very passionate

1072
00:48:49,280 --> 00:48:52,480
Speaker 3: about that about yoga. And I have my books. I

1073
00:48:52,520 --> 00:48:54,279
Speaker 3: still have my music, which I do make money with.

1074
00:48:54,800 --> 00:48:57,120
Speaker 3: It's just not the amount that I would like. Yeah,

1075
00:48:57,200 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 3: of course, but I make money with my music, you know, performances, gigging.

1076
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,160
Speaker 3: I'm a musician, so I you know, I gig here

1077
00:49:05,200 --> 00:49:05,720
Speaker 3: and there.

1078
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:07,719
Speaker 2: And you get paid to do appearances still or not.

1079
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:09,759
Speaker 3: I get paid to do appearances, not as much as

1080
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:12,000
Speaker 3: it was when when we were on Love and obviously

1081
00:49:12,040 --> 00:49:14,320
Speaker 3: you get booked all the time when you're on TV,

1082
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 3: and now it's been years since I was on TV,

1083
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 3: and it's like you don't get booked as much. So

1084
00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 3: it's still like I'm still grinding out here, you know what.

1085
00:49:26,600 --> 00:49:30,920
Speaker 1: Like as a single mom, how were you able to

1086
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,320
Speaker 1: handle it? I guess with the two young the babies

1087
00:49:33,360 --> 00:49:35,960
Speaker 1: being younger because now they're older, But like, were you

1088
00:49:36,239 --> 00:49:36,960
Speaker 1: crying at all?

1089
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:39,920
Speaker 3: Or were you you know, the first two years of

1090
00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:41,799
Speaker 3: moving to La having a newborn and a one year

1091
00:49:41,800 --> 00:49:42,520
Speaker 3: old two year old?

1092
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:44,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, I was crying.

1093
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:46,719
Speaker 3: All the time, Like where was this when she was

1094
00:49:46,760 --> 00:49:48,880
Speaker 3: in Germany? She had moved back to Germany way.

1095
00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:49,640
Speaker 2: So you were really on her.

1096
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I was all by myself.

1097
00:49:51,480 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 3: And even looking back, it's like wow, I look at

1098
00:49:54,520 --> 00:49:56,920
Speaker 3: it from the outside and it's more of a wow

1099
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:58,520
Speaker 3: factor than when you were in it. When I was

1100
00:49:58,520 --> 00:50:00,640
Speaker 3: in it, it was like, it's just what it is.

1101
00:50:00,719 --> 00:50:03,520
Speaker 3: I you know, I took it day by day, and

1102
00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:07,439
Speaker 3: I just know that I was mostly heartbroken more than

1103
00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:12,480
Speaker 3: feeling like like defeated by life. Like it was more

1104
00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:14,799
Speaker 3: like heartbreak that I really had to heal from. Like

1105
00:50:14,840 --> 00:50:17,080
Speaker 3: I said, it took me two years once I healed.

1106
00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:19,600
Speaker 4: From a heartbreak. I really wasn't.

1107
00:50:19,960 --> 00:50:22,320
Speaker 3: I felt so powerful and like I can do anything

1108
00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:24,800
Speaker 3: and so good about life again and all those things.

1109
00:50:25,480 --> 00:50:26,640
Speaker 2: Did you ever date again?

1110
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:28,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm currently in a relationship.

1111
00:50:29,320 --> 00:50:31,439
Speaker 2: Is it a health Is it healthy now? Yeah?

1112
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:34,640
Speaker 3: It's I'm learning so much because I don't have, you know,

1113
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:38,120
Speaker 3: the issues that I've had in the past with men,

1114
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:43,880
Speaker 3: which always kind of related to other women. Yeah, cheating, lies,

1115
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:46,880
Speaker 3: I don't have that issue. It's so relaxed with that

1116
00:50:47,160 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 3: that that I'm learning that there's other issues that you

1117
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:52,400
Speaker 3: can have in relationships, you know, Like I never knew that.

1118
00:50:52,440 --> 00:50:54,280
Speaker 4: I always thought all I want is that someone.

1119
00:50:54,120 --> 00:50:57,680
Speaker 3: Who doesn't lie and cheat, and I'm the only one

1120
00:50:57,800 --> 00:50:58,680
Speaker 3: I have that now.

1121
00:50:58,800 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 4: But it's still not perfect.

1122
00:51:00,239 --> 00:51:04,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's it's different and it's it's so many

1123
00:51:04,760 --> 00:51:07,640
Speaker 3: good things that I'm so thankful for that I never

1124
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:10,680
Speaker 3: believed that it's possible because I hate.

1125
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:12,960
Speaker 4: Thought, oh man, cheat and all men do this well.

1126
00:51:12,960 --> 00:51:14,520
Speaker 1: And yeah, now when I look at men, I look

1127
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:17,600
Speaker 1: at them differently. I'm like, Okay, Like, especially today's age,

1128
00:51:17,600 --> 00:51:19,279
Speaker 1: I think guys are like more like if a girl

1129
00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:22,560
Speaker 1: doesn't sleep with them on the within date three or whatever,

1130
00:51:22,640 --> 00:51:25,080
Speaker 1: like stub bars, and I'm like, well, did we mess

1131
00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:26,040
Speaker 1: up as when the women?

1132
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:29,919
Speaker 2: Are we not setting enough boundaries? Or like why the bar?

1133
00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 1: I feel like men it should have been women are

1134
00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: the pickers or what have you? And we we have

1135
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:39,920
Speaker 1: so much more power than I even knew we had.

1136
00:51:39,920 --> 00:51:41,799
Speaker 1: I didn't know women were so powerful till I had

1137
00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:42,200
Speaker 1: a kid.

1138
00:51:42,719 --> 00:51:44,960
Speaker 4: But yeah, that's the same way I feel.

1139
00:51:44,920 --> 00:51:48,160
Speaker 1: Like I would like I hate when I hear men

1140
00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:49,200
Speaker 1: say I would die for my kid.

1141
00:51:49,239 --> 00:51:50,880
Speaker 2: I'm like, well, well, why don't you try living for

1142
00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:51,279
Speaker 2: your kids.

1143
00:51:51,640 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 1: Why don't you try like putting down the alcohol, putting

1144
00:51:54,120 --> 00:51:57,399
Speaker 1: down the bitches, and like actually living for your kid.

1145
00:51:57,880 --> 00:51:59,919
Speaker 1: I can't stand when a dude will say I would

1146
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:02,120
Speaker 1: die for my murder for my kid. We'll go out

1147
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:03,040
Speaker 1: there and get a job.

1148
00:52:02,840 --> 00:52:03,319
Speaker 2: For your kid.

1149
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:04,600
Speaker 4: I agree with you.

1150
00:52:04,320 --> 00:52:06,440
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying because I promise you, Amina,

1151
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:09,480
Speaker 1: if your back was against the wall and you love

1152
00:52:09,560 --> 00:52:11,640
Speaker 1: singing and you love all these things, and you had

1153
00:52:11,640 --> 00:52:13,279
Speaker 1: to go work at Costco to put some food in

1154
00:52:13,320 --> 00:52:16,560
Speaker 1: your kid's mouth, I guarantee you you'll be saying paper plastic.

1155
00:52:16,600 --> 00:52:19,520
Speaker 1: It's same for me. But we don't have to go

1156
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:21,400
Speaker 1: out there and say I would die for my kid. No,

1157
00:52:21,480 --> 00:52:23,600
Speaker 1: because every day we wake up, we make a constant

1158
00:52:23,680 --> 00:52:25,759
Speaker 1: choice to live, even on a day that you think

1159
00:52:25,800 --> 00:52:28,319
Speaker 1: about quitting on life, Like you know, heartbreak to me

1160
00:52:28,400 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: is the most painful thing ever. And if you ever

1161
00:52:31,600 --> 00:52:33,480
Speaker 1: think about giving up on life, you're like, as a mom,

1162
00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:35,160
Speaker 1: you're like, well, who the fuck is going to take

1163
00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:37,600
Speaker 1: care of my kid? If do I even have a

1164
00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:40,040
Speaker 1: plan in place if I were to be gone? No,

1165
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:41,480
Speaker 1: oh I don't have that plan. Then I got to

1166
00:52:41,520 --> 00:52:43,319
Speaker 1: stay here every day and wake up and fight the

1167
00:52:43,320 --> 00:52:47,680
Speaker 1: good fight. But I commend you as a woman for

1168
00:52:47,760 --> 00:52:51,440
Speaker 1: going through everything you did publicly and even though you

1169
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:53,880
Speaker 1: may have been the side check wife or whatever the

1170
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:56,600
Speaker 1: end goal was, like you kept pressuring this Dudede tell

1171
00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:58,040
Speaker 1: his girl.

1172
00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:01,160
Speaker 4: The truth and on it from the very beginning.

1173
00:53:01,239 --> 00:53:01,560
Speaker 2: It's good.

1174
00:53:01,880 --> 00:53:05,160
Speaker 1: It's good to inside too, because you know, sometimes we

1175
00:53:05,200 --> 00:53:07,000
Speaker 1: look at the side chick like, well, why are you

1176
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:08,719
Speaker 1: in the dark so much? But I remember when I

1177
00:53:08,719 --> 00:53:10,880
Speaker 1: found out about my husband's side chick. She was like

1178
00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 1: in the closet for like years with him, and they

1179
00:53:12,680 --> 00:53:14,160
Speaker 1: were like going back and forth on text, and I

1180
00:53:14,200 --> 00:53:16,440
Speaker 1: was just like, the fuck are you in the closet

1181
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:17,000
Speaker 1: in the years for.

1182
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:18,439
Speaker 2: This fool, Like you know what I'm saying.

1183
00:53:18,880 --> 00:53:22,759
Speaker 3: No, I totally approach it differently too, Like because of that,

1184
00:53:22,960 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 3: you know, I know what it's.

1185
00:53:24,040 --> 00:53:26,720
Speaker 4: Like to be be like hidden.

1186
00:53:27,440 --> 00:53:30,480
Speaker 3: It's one of my requirements now anyone to date, Like

1187
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:35,239
Speaker 3: my boyfriend now knows we've been through that. Like I

1188
00:53:35,320 --> 00:53:38,600
Speaker 3: like I one of my requirements now is like I

1189
00:53:38,640 --> 00:53:41,000
Speaker 3: have to be posted on social media.

1190
00:53:41,320 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeh, it's crazy.

1191
00:53:42,640 --> 00:53:44,800
Speaker 3: Some women like, nah, you know that's going to destroy

1192
00:53:44,880 --> 00:53:47,719
Speaker 3: the relationship. You got to you know, keep stuff private. No,

1193
00:53:48,160 --> 00:53:51,040
Speaker 3: it's a requirement for me if you are exclusively dating

1194
00:53:51,040 --> 00:53:53,360
Speaker 3: me and we are in a serious relationship, that you

1195
00:53:53,400 --> 00:53:56,319
Speaker 3: showed me off, display me, you know, to the world.

1196
00:53:56,440 --> 00:53:58,839
Speaker 1: Well, it's also like it'll I say, women, if we're

1197
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:00,640
Speaker 1: in a relationship, we got we have the same way.

1198
00:54:00,680 --> 00:54:02,080
Speaker 1: The guy has to feel like the king. The woman

1199
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:04,960
Speaker 1: has to feel like a queen period period, point blank.

1200
00:54:05,760 --> 00:54:05,960
Speaker 2: You know.

1201
00:54:07,719 --> 00:54:11,000
Speaker 1: But I have seen like my husband was posting pictures

1202
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,680
Speaker 1: and videos of me like every day, and the side

1203
00:54:13,760 --> 00:54:18,040
Speaker 1: chicks would be like in the DMS, like, oh, you

1204
00:54:18,080 --> 00:54:20,600
Speaker 1: celebrated your one year wedding anniversary. Can we meet up

1205
00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:22,759
Speaker 1: and I hook up with you and be like, oh,

1206
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:23,799
Speaker 1: these chicks don't care.

1207
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:26,319
Speaker 2: They're like, I don't care if you're married or not.

1208
00:54:26,480 --> 00:54:28,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm aware. Like when I say like I need

1209
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:29,319
Speaker 4: to be displayed, it's like.

1210
00:54:30,360 --> 00:54:33,200
Speaker 2: And that's for you to queen, not.

1211
00:54:33,320 --> 00:54:36,719
Speaker 3: Because it's gonna stop him from you know, I know

1212
00:54:36,840 --> 00:54:39,160
Speaker 3: that men can do what they want no matter how

1213
00:54:39,239 --> 00:54:41,160
Speaker 3: much pictures of me are on his basis.

1214
00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:43,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like it's it's a selfish decision.

1215
00:54:44,480 --> 00:54:48,920
Speaker 1: I I'm in a very toxic situation now, but I

1216
00:54:48,960 --> 00:54:52,880
Speaker 1: will say that like I'm taking my time through it,

1217
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:56,439
Speaker 1: and like being able to meet with other single moms

1218
00:54:56,560 --> 00:55:00,440
Speaker 1: or meeting becoming a mom has brought me more closer

1219
00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:03,560
Speaker 1: to I feel like to women, more respect towards women

1220
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,200
Speaker 1: I don't think I ever had before.

1221
00:55:07,040 --> 00:55:07,840
Speaker 2: But I also look.

1222
00:55:07,719 --> 00:55:10,520
Speaker 1: At men like way different, Like the way the game

1223
00:55:10,600 --> 00:55:12,040
Speaker 1: is played now is not you know.

1224
00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 4: And it's I have to say.

1225
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:16,120
Speaker 3: Me and my current boyfriend, he complains about it because

1226
00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:17,000
Speaker 3: he's like, I don't.

1227
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:19,399
Speaker 4: Deserve that, you know, because I do.

1228
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:24,759
Speaker 3: Also he's like, your whole view of men is is

1229
00:55:24,800 --> 00:55:27,560
Speaker 3: different because of your past, not me.

1230
00:55:28,280 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 4: But then I say to him like, yeah, but.

1231
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:30,799
Speaker 2: You are men.

1232
00:55:31,480 --> 00:55:33,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I'm not damn like we have this all

1233
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:34,120
Speaker 4: the time.

1234
00:55:34,200 --> 00:55:37,759
Speaker 3: It's like he thinks it's unfair because I've come out

1235
00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:42,360
Speaker 3: of this such a different person, stronger. I don't allow nothing,

1236
00:55:42,360 --> 00:55:45,040
Speaker 3: like I don't allow any kind of you know.

1237
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:46,160
Speaker 4: I'm so much more.

1238
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:50,680
Speaker 3: My standards are different, Like my boundaries are set and

1239
00:55:50,840 --> 00:55:53,959
Speaker 3: I am just not to be played with now, which

1240
00:55:54,040 --> 00:55:54,759
Speaker 3: I love for me.

1241
00:55:55,120 --> 00:55:57,759
Speaker 4: I love that I've become this way. I feel better

1242
00:55:57,800 --> 00:55:58,240
Speaker 4: this way.

1243
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:01,040
Speaker 2: When you see like a red flag. So I used

1244
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:01,480
Speaker 2: to see a.

1245
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:03,720
Speaker 1: Red flag pointed out to my girlfriend in the beginning

1246
00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 1: of whenever I dated, Oh man, I saw that as

1247
00:56:05,960 --> 00:56:07,640
Speaker 1: a red flag, and I would ignore it. I saw

1248
00:56:07,680 --> 00:56:11,960
Speaker 1: a post somewhere somewhere something said, when you see a

1249
00:56:11,960 --> 00:56:14,040
Speaker 1: red flag and you ignore it, that is the same

1250
00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:17,640
Speaker 1: red flag that you will leave in the end for Yeah,

1251
00:56:17,680 --> 00:56:23,120
Speaker 1: it's true. So now I'm like, red flag, yeah, but

1252
00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:24,520
Speaker 1: you know me too.

1253
00:56:25,640 --> 00:56:30,360
Speaker 3: But I then think about it and like realize that.

1254
00:56:30,880 --> 00:56:33,520
Speaker 3: I mean, red flags, of course are different from like issues,

1255
00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:35,440
Speaker 3: but it's never gonna It's never perfect.

1256
00:56:35,520 --> 00:56:37,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've never seen a perfect matter of fact, I

1257
00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:39,359
Speaker 1: know relationships that look perfect from the.

1258
00:56:39,280 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 2: Outside and I'm like, they're not happy.

1259
00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:44,239
Speaker 1: So I think that's what slowed down my process of

1260
00:56:44,280 --> 00:56:48,240
Speaker 1: leaving my husband is like whether I can deal with everything.

1261
00:56:47,920 --> 00:56:50,399
Speaker 2: But right now what I am learning on right now?

1262
00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:51,960
Speaker 2: Married or not?

1263
00:56:52,200 --> 00:56:55,040
Speaker 1: I still consider myself single because I don't have a

1264
00:56:55,120 --> 00:56:58,240
Speaker 1: counterpart that respects me or enough.

1265
00:56:58,520 --> 00:57:01,880
Speaker 2: But what I will say is I need to focus

1266
00:57:01,880 --> 00:57:02,520
Speaker 2: on my own.

1267
00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:05,920
Speaker 1: Happiness absolutely and just stay in that. What does my

1268
00:57:05,960 --> 00:57:09,080
Speaker 1: happiness look like with or without somebody there, and whether

1269
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:11,279
Speaker 1: I'm married or not, That's where my head's at, like,

1270
00:57:12,160 --> 00:57:14,480
Speaker 1: and I think what I can learn from men are

1271
00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:17,480
Speaker 1: is that they focus on their needs. Yeah. Women, it's

1272
00:57:17,480 --> 00:57:19,520
Speaker 1: like we're designed to put the mask on the person

1273
00:57:19,720 --> 00:57:21,880
Speaker 1: next to us before ourselves. Now, I'm like, you know what,

1274
00:57:23,880 --> 00:57:26,680
Speaker 1: Like when it comes to my child who is helpless,

1275
00:57:26,680 --> 00:57:29,360
Speaker 1: you cannot wipe her butt or feed herself, she is

1276
00:57:29,400 --> 00:57:31,360
Speaker 1: the person that will go before me. But as far

1277
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:35,720
Speaker 1: as everybody else, absolutely not. But I am terrified to

1278
00:57:35,840 --> 00:57:37,320
Speaker 1: date with a child.

1279
00:57:37,640 --> 00:57:38,880
Speaker 4: How is that hard?

1280
00:57:39,120 --> 00:57:42,280
Speaker 3: It is very hard because you know they always come first,

1281
00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:47,040
Speaker 3: like the kids, like my girls, they come first, like

1282
00:57:47,080 --> 00:57:48,680
Speaker 3: you just said, like even before.

1283
00:57:48,400 --> 00:57:49,680
Speaker 4: Me nothing else.

1284
00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:53,640
Speaker 3: Though I am also at a place which none of

1285
00:57:53,640 --> 00:57:57,200
Speaker 3: my past relationships were like this, where I actually do

1286
00:57:57,320 --> 00:58:01,040
Speaker 3: put me first now, even within the relationship, which sometimes

1287
00:58:01,040 --> 00:58:04,360
Speaker 3: causes some you know, it just also caused some because

1288
00:58:04,560 --> 00:58:07,200
Speaker 3: they call yourselfish. You know, I've been called selfish a

1289
00:58:07,200 --> 00:58:08,600
Speaker 3: lot since I've gotten out of this.

1290
00:58:08,960 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 2: If you learn from men, that's what they're doing.

1291
00:58:10,920 --> 00:58:15,280
Speaker 3: Selfish, it's not selfish if it's you know, if you

1292
00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:16,360
Speaker 3: if it's.

1293
00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:19,360
Speaker 4: It's necessary sometimes yeah, you know, to put yourself first

1294
00:58:19,760 --> 00:58:21,200
Speaker 4: doesn't mean you're selfish.

1295
00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:24,160
Speaker 3: And I had to just have to stick by that

1296
00:58:24,400 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 3: even in my current relationship, Like I always have to

1297
00:58:28,840 --> 00:58:32,320
Speaker 3: make sure that I'm I'm good and I put myself first,

1298
00:58:32,880 --> 00:58:34,440
Speaker 3: doesn't matter what anybody thinks.

1299
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:38,800
Speaker 1: Unfortunately, I'm still still growing that past that mountain. I'm

1300
00:58:38,840 --> 00:58:40,800
Speaker 1: thirty nine. I'm like almost there. I feel like once

1301
00:58:40,840 --> 00:58:41,640
Speaker 1: I turned forty.

1302
00:58:42,200 --> 00:58:45,400
Speaker 4: It's a rat. I'm just saying about the same dude.

1303
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:47,160
Speaker 2: We're in the valley. We could do a well. My

1304
00:58:47,240 --> 00:58:50,000
Speaker 2: baby's young, she's only well she's too but she I

1305
00:58:50,040 --> 00:58:53,280
Speaker 2: think she's a teenager. Really, you know, I.

1306
00:58:53,280 --> 00:58:55,440
Speaker 4: Have almost teenager. She's nine. My daughter is nine.

1307
00:58:55,480 --> 00:58:55,600
Speaker 2: Now.

1308
00:58:55,720 --> 00:58:57,520
Speaker 1: I saw eleven year old that looked like a teenager

1309
00:58:57,600 --> 00:59:00,000
Speaker 1: the other day. I thought she was sixty Like boobs is.

1310
00:59:00,160 --> 00:59:01,320
Speaker 4: I'm like, I didn't even have boobs.

1311
00:59:01,440 --> 00:59:04,280
Speaker 1: I was like eight seventeen or something else. I know,

1312
00:59:04,560 --> 00:59:07,320
Speaker 1: I don't know, Like, uh, they're putting hormones in the food.

1313
00:59:07,480 --> 00:59:09,120
Speaker 1: Is your daughter hasn't hippibrity era?

1314
00:59:09,320 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 3: No, but she acts like a teenager for sure. Yeah,

1315
00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:14,480
Speaker 3: like her look why she probably looks her age, but no,

1316
00:59:14,640 --> 00:59:15,680
Speaker 3: she acts.

1317
00:59:15,960 --> 00:59:19,360
Speaker 1: I think mine just acts. I'm I haven't. I had

1318
00:59:19,520 --> 00:59:21,640
Speaker 1: never been around a baby. I haven't arrived very late.

1319
00:59:21,680 --> 00:59:24,880
Speaker 1: But I will say, like, like the more she like

1320
00:59:24,880 --> 00:59:29,160
Speaker 1: sings her alphabet's, her her numbers or something, I'm like,

1321
00:59:29,160 --> 00:59:32,480
Speaker 1: like what happened? Like she wasn't even talking a couple

1322
00:59:32,520 --> 00:59:35,479
Speaker 1: of months. That's everybody's saying. And I kind of hate

1323
00:59:35,480 --> 00:59:38,000
Speaker 1: the cleanness. But then my friends are like, you're gonna

1324
00:59:38,040 --> 00:59:41,760
Speaker 1: miss that shit true, and I'm like, like I haven't.

1325
00:59:41,960 --> 00:59:44,640
Speaker 3: I have like we make promises me and my daughters

1326
00:59:44,680 --> 00:59:47,160
Speaker 3: like promise me that because we like to be physical

1327
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:49,280
Speaker 3: and cuddle, and that's how I want each other so much.

1328
00:59:49,320 --> 00:59:50,240
Speaker 2: I think it's so important.

1329
00:59:50,400 --> 00:59:53,160
Speaker 3: I always say that on social media, like give your

1330
00:59:53,280 --> 00:59:56,440
Speaker 3: kids physical love, hug them, you know, so I do

1331
00:59:56,520 --> 00:59:58,360
Speaker 3: that a lot with mine and I always have like

1332
00:59:58,440 --> 01:00:00,640
Speaker 3: made this promise with them, Please promise me that you

1333
01:00:00,680 --> 01:00:03,640
Speaker 3: will still let me do this when you're sixteen eighteen.

1334
01:00:04,120 --> 01:00:07,240
Speaker 1: And they promised so far, but I know it's they're sixteen,

1335
01:00:07,240 --> 01:00:09,200
Speaker 1: they'll be like, look you get one a week.

1336
01:00:09,520 --> 01:00:12,560
Speaker 2: One hug. Okay, Oh my god, I'm scared.

1337
01:00:12,640 --> 01:00:15,400
Speaker 1: Yet everyone on everybody I've met has said like, at

1338
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:17,360
Speaker 1: some point she's not gonna want to be around you.

1339
01:00:17,440 --> 01:00:21,160
Speaker 1: So as of like the last week, I will say, like, now,

1340
01:00:22,120 --> 01:00:24,160
Speaker 1: I just enjoy it. I do still sleep with her.

1341
01:00:26,080 --> 01:00:29,479
Speaker 1: Some people are against her or whatever. I'm like, there's

1342
01:00:29,480 --> 01:00:31,200
Speaker 1: some night special to make me sleep in her room.

1343
01:00:31,280 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'll sleeping girls sometimes they're on the weekends.

1344
01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:38,560
Speaker 4: They still sleep with me every like Saturday, probably Friday.

1345
01:00:38,640 --> 01:00:42,480
Speaker 1: Now, how often do you switch it off with Peter? Oh,

1346
01:00:42,520 --> 01:00:43,520
Speaker 1: so you're one hundred percent?

1347
01:00:43,760 --> 01:00:44,400
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1348
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:46,600
Speaker 2: Does he ever see the kids?

1349
01:00:46,880 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 3: He hates California, La. Specifically, he does not like to

1350
01:00:51,080 --> 01:00:54,440
Speaker 3: come here. He is still bitter and mad about the

1351
01:00:54,440 --> 01:00:55,240
Speaker 3: fact that I moved here.

1352
01:00:55,560 --> 01:00:57,120
Speaker 4: He's like, I hate coming in. Why did you have

1353
01:00:57,160 --> 01:00:58,040
Speaker 4: to move so far away?

1354
01:00:58,320 --> 01:01:00,240
Speaker 3: Taking my kids away from me? So he kind of

1355
01:01:00,240 --> 01:01:02,280
Speaker 3: blaming me that he can't see him as much.

1356
01:01:02,920 --> 01:01:06,600
Speaker 1: But I'm like, yo, like case a point, Like I

1357
01:01:06,640 --> 01:01:08,880
Speaker 1: said before, I'm sure he's gonna be the first to

1358
01:01:08,920 --> 01:01:10,640
Speaker 1: be like, I'll die for my kids. Oh, you're getting

1359
01:01:10,680 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 1: on a flight to go see your kids. And I'm

1360
01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:15,880
Speaker 1: not trying to bash him, no, but it's like, if

1361
01:01:15,920 --> 01:01:18,680
Speaker 1: the rolls were flipped and he moved, would you not

1362
01:01:18,840 --> 01:01:21,240
Speaker 1: make the time to figure it out? I don't care

1363
01:01:21,280 --> 01:01:23,520
Speaker 1: if eight of those kids are on the East Coast.

1364
01:01:24,080 --> 01:01:26,680
Speaker 1: It's not your problem, dude. You made that decision on

1365
01:01:26,720 --> 01:01:31,680
Speaker 1: whether I could leave the second you stepped out. But

1366
01:01:31,920 --> 01:01:35,400
Speaker 1: I'm way more respect to know that you're really doing

1367
01:01:35,400 --> 01:01:37,320
Speaker 1: this shit on your own and in your are you?

1368
01:01:37,480 --> 01:01:39,000
Speaker 2: Is he at least helping financially or no?

1369
01:01:39,520 --> 01:01:40,919
Speaker 4: Way? Can I still say?

1370
01:01:41,120 --> 01:01:45,120
Speaker 3: You know he's he's just I don't know what word

1371
01:01:45,160 --> 01:01:47,040
Speaker 3: I can put on him, but like I know that

1372
01:01:47,160 --> 01:01:51,720
Speaker 3: he he's like you said, like he's he would do

1373
01:01:51,760 --> 01:01:53,640
Speaker 3: anything for his kids.

1374
01:01:54,160 --> 01:01:55,840
Speaker 4: He's just not always in the position.

1375
01:01:56,480 --> 01:01:58,360
Speaker 2: Do you think that's it or do you think he's

1376
01:01:58,360 --> 01:01:58,760
Speaker 2: maybe I know.

1377
01:01:59,520 --> 01:02:02,600
Speaker 3: That's it, okay, because yeah, he gives when he can.

1378
01:02:02,720 --> 01:02:04,920
Speaker 3: It's just not what it should be.

1379
01:02:05,400 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you're doing it so you're you're the mom

1380
01:02:08,200 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 1: and the dad. Yeah yeah, all right, Well you know what,

1381
01:02:11,600 --> 01:02:14,440
Speaker 1: more props to you? I trust me, I'll married and

1382
01:02:14,480 --> 01:02:17,960
Speaker 1: I'm the mom and the dad pretty much, so it

1383
01:02:18,000 --> 01:02:18,520
Speaker 1: was never.

1384
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:19,200
Speaker 4: Any different from me.

1385
01:02:19,440 --> 01:02:21,800
Speaker 3: And you know, honestly, I also didn't grow up with

1386
01:02:21,840 --> 01:02:24,720
Speaker 3: that mindset, Like I mean, my mom was a single moment,

1387
01:02:24,760 --> 01:02:27,800
Speaker 3: it was normal. It wasn't like the man is supposed

1388
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:29,720
Speaker 3: to provide, and like I didn't grow up thinking that,

1389
01:02:29,840 --> 01:02:30,760
Speaker 3: even because I was.

1390
01:02:30,760 --> 01:02:31,400
Speaker 2: Never taught that.

1391
01:02:31,480 --> 01:02:33,960
Speaker 3: Like my mom always made us feel like if you

1392
01:02:34,040 --> 01:02:35,640
Speaker 3: ever have kids, they're your kids.

1393
01:02:36,000 --> 01:02:37,160
Speaker 2: That's that's all I knew.

1394
01:02:37,160 --> 01:02:39,000
Speaker 3: So I knew by the moment I was pregnant, I

1395
01:02:39,040 --> 01:02:41,720
Speaker 3: was like, I'm gonna have kids, not we Oh okay,

1396
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:45,440
Speaker 3: you know, so for me, maybe that's wrong to think

1397
01:02:45,440 --> 01:02:47,480
Speaker 3: that way, but to me, it was always like I'm

1398
01:02:47,520 --> 01:02:49,520
Speaker 3: gonna have to take care of these kids.

1399
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:52,400
Speaker 1: I came from two parent household, and I think that's

1400
01:02:52,440 --> 01:02:54,120
Speaker 1: where me and my husband always argue. He'll be like

1401
01:02:54,160 --> 01:02:56,040
Speaker 1: I came from a single parent. I come from a

1402
01:02:56,040 --> 01:02:59,040
Speaker 1: two parent But I was very strict, like, look, if

1403
01:02:59,040 --> 01:03:00,800
Speaker 1: we're gonna do this, were gonna do together. But then

1404
01:03:00,840 --> 01:03:04,640
Speaker 1: I always hear the Tupac versu in my head, Mama's baby,

1405
01:03:04,640 --> 01:03:05,560
Speaker 1: papa's maybe is.

1406
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:08,160
Speaker 2: It Tupac or was it Jay, I forgot No, I

1407
01:03:08,200 --> 01:03:08,760
Speaker 2: think it's Jay.

1408
01:03:09,400 --> 01:03:14,760
Speaker 1: I think it's Jay, but anyways, fact check me, but no,

1409
01:03:15,000 --> 01:03:18,960
Speaker 1: that's Jay. How dare I discuspect anyways?

1410
01:03:19,120 --> 01:03:19,280
Speaker 3: Uh?

1411
01:03:19,360 --> 01:03:20,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like.

1412
01:03:22,160 --> 01:03:25,160
Speaker 1: Now I realize it's mama's baby. No matter what, I'm

1413
01:03:25,200 --> 01:03:27,320
Speaker 1: your rid or die, I'm your best friend, I'm your soldier,

1414
01:03:27,360 --> 01:03:29,360
Speaker 1: and I absolutely.

1415
01:03:31,000 --> 01:03:33,120
Speaker 2: Yeah. You ain't gotta tell them, you can just showed them.

1416
01:03:33,400 --> 01:03:35,760
Speaker 1: But thank you so much for coming on this show

1417
01:03:35,880 --> 01:03:39,280
Speaker 1: and blessing me with a great meal and being extremely transparent.

1418
01:03:40,080 --> 01:03:42,240
Speaker 1: Where can people keep up with you? And like what

1419
01:03:42,440 --> 01:03:44,920
Speaker 1: is going on? Like what projects do you have going on?

1420
01:03:44,960 --> 01:03:47,400
Speaker 1: And you just head directly to this one.

1421
01:03:47,600 --> 01:03:50,479
Speaker 3: Yes, So I just released the album this year. It's

1422
01:03:50,520 --> 01:03:54,080
Speaker 3: my first ever. I mean, it's my fourth full album

1423
01:03:54,160 --> 01:03:56,600
Speaker 3: as an independent artist. So it's crazy to think I've

1424
01:03:56,600 --> 01:04:00,400
Speaker 3: put out albums independently but never with a label, even

1425
01:04:00,440 --> 01:04:02,080
Speaker 3: though I was signed multiple times.

1426
01:04:02,400 --> 01:04:04,400
Speaker 4: And so the album is called four point zero.

1427
01:04:04,920 --> 01:04:12,680
Speaker 3: And produced by me exclusively. And yeah, besides that, you know,

1428
01:04:12,760 --> 01:04:15,680
Speaker 3: check out my books. I have my Dishes and More

1429
01:04:15,760 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 3: spelled whether I am I Dishes and More available on Amazon,

1430
01:04:19,280 --> 01:04:21,800
Speaker 3: and then I also have The Other Woman if you

1431
01:04:21,840 --> 01:04:23,800
Speaker 3: are more interested in my story because it talks about

1432
01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:26,400
Speaker 3: everything kind of we talked about today and then you know,

1433
01:04:26,520 --> 01:04:29,520
Speaker 3: being in a public eye with my relationship, so the

1434
01:04:29,560 --> 01:04:31,680
Speaker 3: other woman and my dishes and more.

1435
01:04:32,280 --> 01:04:35,000
Speaker 2: And yeah, I have fitness.

1436
01:04:34,600 --> 01:04:37,320
Speaker 3: Events coming, you know, Like I said, I'm into fitness

1437
01:04:37,320 --> 01:04:39,120
Speaker 3: and yoga and all that stuff. Me and my boyfriend

1438
01:04:39,160 --> 01:04:42,160
Speaker 3: actually having our first event coming up next month, Fit

1439
01:04:42,240 --> 01:04:42,680
Speaker 3: for Life.

1440
01:04:43,240 --> 01:04:46,280
Speaker 4: So you know, I do all the things that I love.

1441
01:04:46,360 --> 01:04:48,880
Speaker 3: I like to I just like to do things that

1442
01:04:48,960 --> 01:04:51,080
Speaker 3: I love and not fall into the trap of oh

1443
01:04:51,120 --> 01:04:52,560
Speaker 3: I have to do this because you.

1444
01:04:52,520 --> 01:04:53,080
Speaker 2: Know I love that.

1445
01:04:53,200 --> 01:04:55,919
Speaker 7: Now you self published your books, yes, well, the first

1446
01:04:55,920 --> 01:04:58,400
Speaker 7: one was published by a publishing company, Thirteenth and Joan

1447
01:04:58,760 --> 01:05:02,120
Speaker 7: that came out and the U I moved to California

1448
01:05:02,160 --> 01:05:03,280
Speaker 7: in twenty sixteen.

1449
01:05:03,840 --> 01:05:05,960
Speaker 4: And I always.

1450
01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:07,440
Speaker 3: Say, anybody that watched me on the show and has

1451
01:05:07,440 --> 01:05:09,640
Speaker 3: an opinion of me, read the book, and.

1452
01:05:09,560 --> 01:05:11,840
Speaker 4: Then you can say I want to read it. Yeah,

1453
01:05:12,000 --> 01:05:14,960
Speaker 4: I should have brought you one forgot, but yeah, the

1454
01:05:15,040 --> 01:05:17,880
Speaker 4: other woman and yet that's it.

1455
01:05:18,040 --> 01:05:20,760
Speaker 3: Like just follow me on social media at Amina Butterfly

1456
01:05:21,840 --> 01:05:24,480
Speaker 3: with two d's and yeah.

1457
01:05:24,960 --> 01:05:27,600
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. Just so you guys know, behind

1458
01:05:27,600 --> 01:05:29,480
Speaker 1: the scenes, I've met Amina before. I think I may

1459
01:05:29,520 --> 01:05:34,120
Speaker 1: have said it earlier. Super sweet, super easy to talk

1460
01:05:34,200 --> 01:05:37,400
Speaker 1: to from the damn met you. So when I think

1461
01:05:38,000 --> 01:05:43,040
Speaker 1: your publicists that I have what was actually through Yeah, ok, yeah,

1462
01:05:43,040 --> 01:05:47,160
Speaker 1: I didn't realize until today. And so that's so full circle.

1463
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:50,360
Speaker 1: She has seen I had seen your name on the list,

1464
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:52,360
Speaker 1: and I said, oh no, I definitely want to have

1465
01:05:52,400 --> 01:05:54,000
Speaker 1: a mina on the show for sure.

1466
01:05:55,000 --> 01:05:57,160
Speaker 2: But it's nice to come full circle.

1467
01:05:57,200 --> 01:06:00,000
Speaker 1: But if you're ever bored in the valley on the weekend,

1468
01:06:00,680 --> 01:06:01,520
Speaker 1: I'll be doing nothing.

1469
01:06:01,600 --> 01:06:04,000
Speaker 2: I'll be honest. Yeah, let's do something. I'll just be

1470
01:06:04,600 --> 01:06:05,080
Speaker 2: with the kids.

1471
01:06:05,120 --> 01:06:06,240
Speaker 4: Me too, my daughter.

1472
01:06:06,840 --> 01:06:09,400
Speaker 1: I'm always trying to find something cool. I heard Irvines

1473
01:06:09,440 --> 01:06:12,560
Speaker 1: doing like this cool pumpkin patch and they have like

1474
01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:15,520
Speaker 1: a children's museum right close to it, but they have

1475
01:06:15,640 --> 01:06:17,360
Speaker 1: like farm animals and all this. So I'm gonna do

1476
01:06:17,440 --> 01:06:20,880
Speaker 1: like a two a j adventure and then another mom

1477
01:06:20,920 --> 01:06:25,280
Speaker 1: hack I learned, which anyone listening, this is a cool hack.

1478
01:06:25,360 --> 01:06:28,800
Speaker 1: I got in someone's friends and family for the hotels. Yeah,

1479
01:06:28,840 --> 01:06:30,600
Speaker 1: and I tell people if you especially if you're follow

1480
01:06:30,720 --> 01:06:32,840
Speaker 1: a following. I had my little brother do this post

1481
01:06:32,840 --> 01:06:34,920
Speaker 1: on social like do you work at the Marriott or

1482
01:06:34,920 --> 01:06:37,240
Speaker 1: the Hilton? And when they put you on Friends and Family,

1483
01:06:37,240 --> 01:06:39,240
Speaker 1: you get like fifty percent off on your hotels.

1484
01:06:40,320 --> 01:06:40,560
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1485
01:06:40,800 --> 01:06:43,320
Speaker 1: So now if I go to San Diego or Irvine

1486
01:06:43,320 --> 01:06:45,440
Speaker 1: and I don't want to drive back, I'll just book

1487
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:47,600
Speaker 1: a hotel. It'll be like at the Hilton and the

1488
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:49,600
Speaker 1: Marriotte for like one hundred bucks.

1489
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:50,320
Speaker 4: Wow.

1490
01:06:50,400 --> 01:06:53,840
Speaker 1: Okay, so that's a cool mom hack right, amazing. And

1491
01:06:53,920 --> 01:06:57,200
Speaker 1: so now when I travel, I don't have to worry

1492
01:06:57,200 --> 01:06:59,760
Speaker 1: about hotel accommodations because I could stay in a good

1493
01:06:59,760 --> 01:07:01,760
Speaker 1: hotel for half the price.

1494
01:07:02,160 --> 01:07:03,520
Speaker 2: And you mean you have to do your research and

1495
01:07:03,600 --> 01:07:04,520
Speaker 2: play around in the app.

1496
01:07:04,560 --> 01:07:07,320
Speaker 1: But like I always tell people, like, don't just think

1497
01:07:07,360 --> 01:07:11,240
Speaker 1: about making money, but think about how you can save money.

1498
01:07:11,520 --> 01:07:13,600
Speaker 2: So if you want feel it.

1499
01:07:13,640 --> 01:07:15,439
Speaker 1: If I see you're on your social that you post

1500
01:07:15,440 --> 01:07:17,840
Speaker 1: do you work at any of the hotels or the airlines?

1501
01:07:17,920 --> 01:07:19,880
Speaker 1: Is another one? Post like do you work for the airlines?

1502
01:07:19,960 --> 01:07:21,640
Speaker 1: D im me, do you work for the hotels? Because

1503
01:07:21,680 --> 01:07:25,080
Speaker 1: all they have to do is you add your information

1504
01:07:25,400 --> 01:07:28,320
Speaker 1: and then you're good to go. And they just extended

1505
01:07:28,320 --> 01:07:29,160
Speaker 1: that discount to you.

1506
01:07:29,320 --> 01:07:29,640
Speaker 4: Wow.

1507
01:07:29,840 --> 01:07:33,360
Speaker 1: And so now I literally travel wherever I want because

1508
01:07:33,400 --> 01:07:35,520
Speaker 1: I know that the hotels aren't gonna you know, if

1509
01:07:35,560 --> 01:07:36,720
Speaker 1: I want to go to San Diego, I don't have

1510
01:07:36,720 --> 01:07:39,640
Speaker 1: to worry about driving it back, you know, right, So

1511
01:07:39,680 --> 01:07:41,320
Speaker 1: staycations are a lot easy there.

1512
01:07:41,960 --> 01:07:44,640
Speaker 2: Ago, I'm telling you take my advice.

1513
01:07:44,640 --> 01:07:47,160
Speaker 1: And then if you worst case scenario, if it's something local,

1514
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:48,840
Speaker 1: you could just hit me. I'll sign you into the hotel.

1515
01:07:48,880 --> 01:07:51,160
Speaker 1: But I've hoked up plenty of my friends. But I

1516
01:07:51,200 --> 01:07:53,280
Speaker 1: my little brother just did it recently. He got the

1517
01:07:53,280 --> 01:07:54,040
Speaker 1: same Hilton.

1518
01:07:54,160 --> 01:07:57,040
Speaker 2: He's like, dude, it's so plush, and.

1519
01:07:56,960 --> 01:07:59,160
Speaker 1: It's just about reaching out to your network and saying, hey,

1520
01:07:59,480 --> 01:08:01,200
Speaker 1: you aren't here, can you extend your discout?

1521
01:08:02,440 --> 01:08:05,440
Speaker 2: So mom hack of the day. Guys, anyways, thank you.

1522
01:08:05,560 --> 01:08:08,120
Speaker 1: Check us out on Eating while Broke, check out Amina's

1523
01:08:08,400 --> 01:08:13,000
Speaker 1: books or music online and support Yes all right.

1524
01:08:13,840 --> 01:08:14,520
Speaker 2: Piece out.

1525
01:08:33,360 --> 01:08:36,559
Speaker 1: For more Eating while Broke from iHeartRadio and The Black Effect,

1526
01:08:36,760 --> 01:08:39,440
Speaker 1: Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts

1527
01:08:39,520 --> 01:08:41,479
Speaker 4: Or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.