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Speaker 1: and let's get on with the show. So hally, y'all,
Speaker 1: what's up is Monday? Y'all? Love? I think we are
Speaker 1: making people love Mondays now. I ain't even gonna hold
Speaker 1: you Monday suppressing as Yeah, they'd be excited when they
Speaker 1: hear our voices. So welcome you'all to another episode of
Speaker 1: Horrible Decisions that the girl, Mandy Be, I'm Wheezy and
Speaker 1: we have a special guest. Can you introduce yourself? Hi,
Speaker 1: I'm Liz Goldwyn and I am the founder of the
Speaker 1: sex Ed. I need to add something behind be because
Speaker 1: I like to have a full name, like dang, just be,
Speaker 1: I'm Liz gold What do I say? I know you
Speaker 1: don't start saying. We're also not we don't have as
Speaker 1: many accolades, so maybe that's why we don't say her name.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean, you're accountant. That's pretty much
Speaker 1: our own accolades to the show. Um. So I met
Speaker 1: Liz when I went to a porn pant Porn and
Speaker 1: Pleasure with Eric lest I talked about that all the time,
Speaker 1: and I was like so enamored just seeing like two
Speaker 1: women up there talking about you know, and both of
Speaker 1: you look so poised, and you know, Eric was verry.
Speaker 1: I'm not even gonna hold you. I feel like I
Speaker 1: gotta speak a little during. Basically, what she's saying is
Speaker 1: we're ghetto, you know. I was just like, damn, this
Speaker 1: is so dope. And I knew who Eric LLSS was
Speaker 1: and I never had heard of you before. And then
Speaker 1: when you talked about directing and all the things that
Speaker 1: you've done, and you were just very pro women, and
Speaker 1: I felt like it would be perfect fresh show. Not
Speaker 1: only did she got a blue checkmark, that's right, that's right,
Speaker 1: it is verified. But I listened to one of your
Speaker 1: episodes where I don't know if it was a man
Speaker 1: I wanted teaching blow drop tricks, blue paget, yeah, and
Speaker 1: giving falacio and lingus. Actually, we have yet to do
Speaker 1: a kind of lingus one that's very important. People don't.
Speaker 1: I've actually had people tell me before like that when
Speaker 1: they were teenage boys, they would google how to you know,
Speaker 1: how to give proper, proper head for women. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: let's see, there's a two hour video of it on
Speaker 1: portn Hub because I looked it up before. Now did
Speaker 1: you want to? I mean, but here's the thing, Like
Speaker 1: doesn't everyone like the same way with men? A lot
Speaker 1: men like to receive head in different ways. There's not
Speaker 1: really one way to perform kind of ling it like give.
Speaker 1: I mean, there's no one way to do any now.
Speaker 1: But it's actually right, right, but we but just like
Speaker 1: there's good job tips like actually sucking or being able
Speaker 1: to twisting motions that there were some good tips in
Speaker 1: there too, especially I think for women. For me, I
Speaker 1: got a laby a massage and I talked about it
Speaker 1: all the time on the show because it was so amazing.
Speaker 1: When I watched the How To Eat Pussy thing, he
Speaker 1: touched the lips a lot, and the things people forget
Speaker 1: to do. They just like either go right on your
Speaker 1: clip or they just start sticking fingers in there and
Speaker 1: there's not like this nice suave movement to it that
Speaker 1: I want. But we can all learn. But it's a
Speaker 1: good video. But that episode, Holy Shit, is one of
Speaker 1: our more popular episodes. I will, I mean it was,
Speaker 1: and you did a very good job asking like so
Speaker 1: exactly how and she, I mean she broke because what
Speaker 1: I liked to do. What the whole concept of what
Speaker 1: we're doing with the sex said is even on our
Speaker 1: site when we have articles like anal sex one oh
Speaker 1: one or orgasm breathing, which I know you want to
Speaker 1: get to our period sex is I try to imagine.
Speaker 1: I mean, now you're getting really happy with it. You
Speaker 1: just said that really proudly, and I'm just like, I mean,
Speaker 1: I love it and I'm always super horny, like right
Speaker 1: before my period when I'm on my period. It's a
Speaker 1: personal thing. But like I like to think that we're
Speaker 1: not talking to people who necessarily have ever done any
Speaker 1: of this before. Like you can't assume that people are
Speaker 1: There's no such thing really as being an expert in sex.
Speaker 1: We're all trying to figure it out. We're all like
Speaker 1: on this evolving learning curve, right, and like what turns
Speaker 1: you on now might be totally different in six months,
Speaker 1: six years. I mean, I hope that I'm super freaky
Speaker 1: when I'm eighty, that I'm doing things that I'm not
Speaker 1: doing now, so you keep I made my mom, Actually,
Speaker 1: my mother edited our anal sex one oh one essay
Speaker 1: and she's like, I don't know what, honey, I've never
Speaker 1: had anal sex. I'm like, that's great, because I want
Speaker 1: this to read like real one oh one in the
Speaker 1: person who wrote it was an expert, and so she
Speaker 1: is me to edit back and she's like, you know,
Speaker 1: you talk about at the end of the article talks
Speaker 1: about poo and does it hurt, and like, I feel
Speaker 1: like you got to mention that right up top, which
Speaker 1: was a great tip. And what's crazy is we were
Speaker 1: just in Miami and that was one of the questions
Speaker 1: a woman like asking how she can go through with
Speaker 1: having anal sex and so we all gave anal sex tips. Um,
Speaker 1: but you keep mentioning the sex ed. I want our
Speaker 1: listeners to know that is the name of your podcast.
Speaker 1: It's it's our it's our podcast, but it's also our
Speaker 1: website is the sex Said dot Com. And we do.
Speaker 1: We have essays written by experts, We do live talks
Speaker 1: and events. I actually bought the domain names in two
Speaker 1: thousand eight. I was gonna say no one else own it.
Speaker 1: I owned the sex Said and I owned the Sex
Speaker 1: Said show dot Com, both of them. Yeah. I've been
Speaker 1: in this game a long time. My first job was
Speaker 1: at Planned Parents Who when I was thirteen, working in
Speaker 1: the clinic, and I answered phones um. And then I
Speaker 1: did peer education, and then I helped organized their media librarys.
Speaker 1: This is like pre Google, so people will come in
Speaker 1: and check out like books and vhs, not even DVDs,
Speaker 1: but vhs and pamphlets. Um. And then I wrote. I
Speaker 1: wrote two books about sexuality, the first one about burlesque
Speaker 1: and the advent of strip tease. We have yet to
Speaker 1: do an episode on that. I want. I mean when
Speaker 1: she when I when I talked to those like what
Speaker 1: what can we talk about? And she mentioned burlesque. I
Speaker 1: just felt like the topic for today's episode is like
Speaker 1: starting over again and just getting back to yourself. And
Speaker 1: I feel like you've lived a lot of life, especially
Speaker 1: to have been married. That's really important even if someone's
Speaker 1: not married right now. But it's just a break up.
Speaker 1: How do I reinvent myself? How do I get back
Speaker 1: out there? The number one question? I feel like after
Speaker 1: their shows, I totally had to do that. I mean
Speaker 1: I met my ex husband when I was eighteen, and
Speaker 1: I really struggled when we got married. I really you know,
Speaker 1: that whole thing like who am I? What's my identity?
Speaker 1: And even though I was like I had a career,
Speaker 1: I had, you know, I was, you know, writing books,
Speaker 1: I had made a film, it's sold it to HBO,
Speaker 1: also on bur lesque, all of a sudden I had
Speaker 1: this fear that like, oh, I'm just going to be
Speaker 1: a wife. Is that what people are going to look
Speaker 1: at me? As as I was young, no one else
Speaker 1: was married, and and you know, we were together for
Speaker 1: thirteen years and you're a very different person from eighteen
Speaker 1: to thirty, and I wife wasn't even anything I knew
Speaker 1: about your identity. I just knew boss witch Li is
Speaker 1: all this list of ship that like when you google
Speaker 1: you that you find and it's crazy that someone like
Speaker 1: you could have thought that. But you know what, it
Speaker 1: made me kind of focus on being a boss bitch
Speaker 1: because I was like not going to bart. I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm at stoner and always have been. So I brought
Speaker 1: my vey, have my vade pen in my bag. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Big On cannabis, we do a lot of cannabis on
Speaker 1: our site, Cannada the neuroscience. Yeah, he's over there being like, yeah,
Speaker 1: neuroscignce my my boyfriend actually is in cannabis too. No,
Speaker 1: but yeah, can neuroscience of cannabis and cannabis and sex
Speaker 1: because first of all, alcohol, we know the science alcohol
Speaker 1: and consent. We don't know the song we do because
Speaker 1: we publish it. We published it. We do. Alcohol is
Speaker 1: definitely like it's much better for your body right to
Speaker 1: use cannabis. And it also when it comes to consent
Speaker 1: and boundaries people, there's a lot more around assault and
Speaker 1: rape with alcohol. And then can't what are you gonna do?
Speaker 1: Like you're gonna get high and you're gonna get tired
Speaker 1: and you know you're gonna eat a snack or I
Speaker 1: can't feel you're not going to get aggressive. Well, I
Speaker 1: had edibles and I actually did it so that my
Speaker 1: mind could be at ease and so that I didn't
Speaker 1: think of all the horsh things I was about to do.
Speaker 1: But but yeah, I actually had like one of my
Speaker 1: male male three male male female threesomes on edibles and
Speaker 1: I was gone, honey, I was in the stars. Like
Speaker 1: he like his friends started well at one point, I
Speaker 1: didn't even know which one I was, but like seriously,
Speaker 1: but like the friend like started making me squirt and
Speaker 1: I was just like whoa, what's going on? Who's doing that?
Speaker 1: And then my guy was like what you're doing? But
Speaker 1: it was feeling good but he didn't really know. But yeah,
Speaker 1: gotta know your dosing. Yeah, well I did. It was
Speaker 1: one gubby bear. I should have had a leg a
Speaker 1: quarter had a quarter in California where I live, Like
Speaker 1: we've got sensories and different. I mean it is That's
Speaker 1: why I don't smoke weed with my West Coast friend
Speaker 1: and they're like, we gotta get you hind and I'm like, I, no,
Speaker 1: you don't. Well we reusally got some icebreakers that we
Speaker 1: like to do with our guests, and this is kind
Speaker 1: of just to open you up, not literally, but just
Speaker 1: to kind of, you know, get you on your little
Speaker 1: horrible decisions vibe. Okay, So first one, I haven't pulled
Speaker 1: up right here. When is the last time you came?
Speaker 1: If solo? What were you watching slash thinking about the
Speaker 1: last time I came this week? Uh? Was it is today? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Like I don't know the day before yesterday, the day
Speaker 1: before yesterday, because I haven't I haven't been like home
Speaker 1: all day. But I really do think like it's great
Speaker 1: to masturbate before like you have a big meeting. I
Speaker 1: mean date for sure, if you're at all. But like
Speaker 1: I think I'm a big believer in orgasm manifesting. Oh
Speaker 1: my god. We had Kristen sal Yeah. She she wrote
Speaker 1: the book which is feminist LS. So we had her
Speaker 1: on and she was like, oh, talking about sex magic
Speaker 1: and she's like, you've got to get some greenery if
Speaker 1: you want money, and think about it. I was like,
Speaker 1: damn you can. Yeah, you can masturbate an orgasm for financials.
Speaker 1: I mean you can visualize a color, you can visualize
Speaker 1: something you want the same way that I don't know
Speaker 1: if you guys do altars at all ever, like burn candles? Yeah,
Speaker 1: like have an altar in your house where you like
Speaker 1: I have a small one. Yeah, maybe you have like
Speaker 1: a picture, you know, whatever it is that you can
Speaker 1: make your own. But yeah, I do think like masturbation
Speaker 1: is really so you didn't before a meeting? What did
Speaker 1: you were you watch? I actually well know that my
Speaker 1: last quarter as I was with my boyfriend. But I
Speaker 1: do think, I do think I do. I am a big,
Speaker 1: big fan of like masturbating before big business meetings. I've
Speaker 1: been doing it before interviews, like since we had her,
Speaker 1: like I've been having small interviews for like little casting things,
Speaker 1: and I just tried to fund myself and think, you know,
Speaker 1: maybe the pheromones are out there, they're like booking me
Speaker 1: for Hoshan anyway. But it relaxed, It relaxes you, and
Speaker 1: I puts you in touch with your own power. So well,
Speaker 1: and I do I masturbate um every time, like I
Speaker 1: go to sleep. But the last time I came was
Speaker 1: hot today there my lunch break, bitch green As was
Speaker 1: up here. You know, I just sucked him in Miami.
Speaker 1: So I felt like he had to like redeem himself
Speaker 1: a little bit. Um. So he hit me and he
Speaker 1: was like, I'm in New York. I say, dick your
Speaker 1: lunch bread. Literally it was amazing. My friend said, I
Speaker 1: was the best hope. Forty minutes, Bro got it to
Speaker 1: him in midtown. But Big came back to motherfucking office
Speaker 1: and our heads time to pick up some motherfucking lunch.
Speaker 1: But it was so well, does anyone else use your computer? No,
Speaker 1: it's my computer with my monitor, thank thank you, But no,
Speaker 1: I did have to, like and my bun almost came
Speaker 1: off because I ain't got bobby pins, so this is
Speaker 1: really like a loose bun. And I had to put
Speaker 1: a bun on today because I thought we was gonna
Speaker 1: have video, but Benson motherfucking as at home. Sorry guys,
Speaker 1: sorry lack of video today. We're gonna, you know, post
Speaker 1: a picture of how cute Whiz is. Yeah, but it
Speaker 1: was great. Um, good for you, yeah he um. He
Speaker 1: let me know he's in town to see a doctor
Speaker 1: or whatever. So it's just like an in and out
Speaker 1: he leaves tonight. No, it's not, you know, he's athletic. Um.
Speaker 1: I'm actually impressed that you managed to fit the lunch
Speaker 1: in too, so I know I'm right like I did
Speaker 1: he I did bring the lunch back to my desk.
Speaker 1: I didn't have no, we didn't have time for this,
Speaker 1: so I literally walked in and so what's crazy is
Speaker 1: we still kind of did to catch up, but you know,
Speaker 1: I just saw him in Miami, so there was not
Speaker 1: much to catch up on. Except when I walked to
Speaker 1: the room, I was like, you ain't gonna pull that
Speaker 1: ship you did in Miami? Are we doing? Bro? He
Speaker 1: like he been, He's been in Miami for the off season, so, bitch,
Speaker 1: we went through three condoms but he didn't come. So
Speaker 1: then he like had me sucking his dick just for
Speaker 1: too long. Bro, I said, sir, I have a live show.
Speaker 1: I need my jaw. And it was just like I'd
Speaker 1: never I haven't sucked dick with an attitude in a
Speaker 1: long as time, bitch, I was. I had the biggest
Speaker 1: attitude sucking. I was like, I was like, Nigga, is
Speaker 1: you gonna come or I ain't gonna keep sucking his
Speaker 1: dick Like I was just angry sucking a dick. So
Speaker 1: I like, as we're walking around the room, I'm like,
Speaker 1: you ain't gonna pull that ship? Did you last time?
Speaker 1: He asked how the show was? So, while we're talking
Speaker 1: after having taking did it was so great? This pretty much?
Speaker 1: And then we laid on the bed, I started sucking
Speaker 1: and he got really hard, and then we sucked and
Speaker 1: I he's he's comparable ton stick. So I come with
Speaker 1: penetration with him like almost every time we So I
Speaker 1: had two orgasms during my lunch break and it was amazing.
Speaker 1: So what about you? You're making me like really horny
Speaker 1: right now. I wonder if that's what would be talking
Speaker 1: about while they be at work. Oh my god, Me
Speaker 1: and Mandy were playing like porn into the fucking mic.
Speaker 1: This girl was like, I couldn't even take it anymore.
Speaker 1: I kind of feel bad, but they choose to listen
Speaker 1: to this at their jobs. It's not our fucking you
Speaker 1: should ride do it on the ride home. So whatever,
Speaker 1: when the last time you? Or I've had so many
Speaker 1: threesomes this past week that um with the same two people.
Speaker 1: By the way, I'll get into that in another show
Speaker 1: because it's definitely a story, but I'm ovulating this week.
Speaker 1: I cannot stop sucking myself, like it's so insane. We're
Speaker 1: all in this group chat right, and everybody's like out
Speaker 1: on their post vacation blues, like we all feel like shit,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, because we've been together and cuddling,
Speaker 1: and like he's like, damn, I woke up alone and
Speaker 1: like I looked to laugh at listen the right she's alone,
Speaker 1: and so like I can't stop mastering it. Probably three
Speaker 1: times a day. I mean maybe a little bit more.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna front. But even when I pull up
Speaker 1: the porn, now I look, I have to look up
Speaker 1: passionate threesome and then you you type in passionate bro,
Speaker 1: because I have to imagine what I have emotional passionate threesome.
Speaker 1: An here I go. I just I just want gang bang.
Speaker 1: I normally want gang bang, but I have to emulate.
Speaker 1: So now it's not even good enough. Now I have
Speaker 1: to look at the pictures of both of them and
Speaker 1: the small little videos we made, and I have to
Speaker 1: go think about it and then master me. I can't
Speaker 1: look at porn right now because the sex I had
Speaker 1: was so good, probably the best sex I've ever had,
Speaker 1: that porn doesn't work anymore. So I came with an
Speaker 1: attitude basically, you suck dick with an attitude. I came
Speaker 1: with an attitude. You were probably fine. I don't want.
Speaker 1: I don't want. I mean, I watch a lot of
Speaker 1: porn for work for research, like for a long time,
Speaker 1: so I don't really watch it in my personal life.
Speaker 1: Really can you without it? They don't need it. I
Speaker 1: don't know I need any I can't masturbate it all
Speaker 1: without porn. I'm but I'm visual. I don't think my
Speaker 1: imagination is there all the way. What do you think
Speaker 1: about everything? Anything? I just I guess it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: I have I feel like all day long and looking
Speaker 1: at so much stuff for work that like at a
Speaker 1: certain point I get over sat saturated and I just
Speaker 1: like it's almost like it becomes work. So it's like
Speaker 1: not sexy sexy to me. But like I'll read erotica sometimes,
Speaker 1: or like I don't read. I love. We have a
Speaker 1: whole section on our website. We have a whole bookshelf section.
Speaker 1: Actually it was like all sorts of things, like all
Speaker 1: sorts of books around sex, health, consciousness, erotica. Yeah, I love, big,
Speaker 1: big fan of erotica. Well, speaking of that, we have
Speaker 1: another little game it's called this or That, So yeah,
Speaker 1: this is all for you. So vibrator or your hand.
Speaker 1: I gotta go with a vibrator. Yeah, just because I
Speaker 1: love my lil I love. I'm a big Lielo fanfully,
Speaker 1: so they are very expensive, but I've had only I've
Speaker 1: had too lelos, like only two don't wear out over
Speaker 1: like the last like you have a section couple. The
Speaker 1: last nine years, I gets sent a ton of vibrators
Speaker 1: and those are like my standby of the not I
Speaker 1: was telling us advertising. But also, you know, you gotta
Speaker 1: be really careful. We have another thing on our site
Speaker 1: about sex toy safety because a lot of the sex
Speaker 1: toy companies that they're using like toxic plastics on the
Speaker 1: vibrators and they don't clean, they don't clean. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: you gotta be really really careful about what you put Regina. Alright,
Speaker 1: so male male female threesome or female female male threesome.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm really a big fan of homeorotic porn
Speaker 1: actually in the room. Yes, if I'm going to watch porn,
Speaker 1: I probably that's what it gay me. So just Dick's
Speaker 1: galoy like bisexual threesome and that normally comes with that
Speaker 1: is sex. Oh my god, bisexual male milk when it's
Speaker 1: like a sixty nine with a guy and a girl, right,
Speaker 1: and then that guy's sucking her and then like the
Speaker 1: other one sexist dick. Yeah, I really like that too. Well,
Speaker 1: clearly I think I've said that. Okay, So a little
Speaker 1: bit of b DSM, blind foe or handcuffs, I like, um,
Speaker 1: what do I have a blindfold? Um? Like a little
Speaker 1: whip of like a nice little suede whip. I've been
Speaker 1: tied up. I've been tied up professionally too, by one
Speaker 1: of my really close friends who's one of the best
Speaker 1: like mistresses of the ropes in the world. She has
Speaker 1: a salon and parents around, Like, I mean it took hours, yeah,
Speaker 1: elaborate hours to tie you. Yeah, because like it's a
Speaker 1: whole thing. Like no, I mean we did it was
Speaker 1: like in a hotel room. Yeah, and then she put
Speaker 1: me like I wanted to. I really want to do
Speaker 1: it with her to see, like what did I like?
Speaker 1: What do I don't like? Okay, so I don't like
Speaker 1: being hog tied. That wasn't me, Like, yeah, I got
Speaker 1: really claustrophobic. But it was super interesting because she kept
Speaker 1: on saying to me, remember your breathing remember your yoga,
Speaker 1: remember your meditation the whole time, which I hadn't really
Speaker 1: got acted. No, it's really important to like be in
Speaker 1: your body, to really be in your body, get out
Speaker 1: of your head. Yeah yeah, well you can't move, you're
Speaker 1: being confined. And she you know, there's all the knots
Speaker 1: in the back. She's so I'm in this sort of
Speaker 1: elaborate braided corset especially, and everything meets and the small
Speaker 1: on my back and then it's like, you know, a
Speaker 1: long cord and she's holding it. And at the end
Speaker 1: of what was probably like four hours, she was like,
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, I need to get out of
Speaker 1: this now. And she was like, well, let me just
Speaker 1: do one thing with you. And you know that game
Speaker 1: when your kid trust forwards. She was like to fall forwards.
Speaker 1: So I fell forwards, but she's holding me, so I
Speaker 1: you know, I'm suspended, like just above the ground. And
Speaker 1: it was such a like I felt so safe. I felt.
Speaker 1: And she works a lot with women, especially who are
Speaker 1: dealing with like reclaiming their bodies or sexual assault, and
Speaker 1: I was like, it was like, you know how sometimes
Speaker 1: you need to walk into someone else's shoes to understand.
Speaker 1: I really needed to do that to be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I totally get it. Of course, I feel so protected
Speaker 1: and safe and like in your signed and you feel like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like I felt us. Imagine if someone took
Speaker 1: hours in you and you're like, oh, I get it,
Speaker 1: and then yeah, and then you have ghost ropes. I
Speaker 1: definitely feel like you have like ghost yeah, but no,
Speaker 1: also you just feel you feel like you feel like
Speaker 1: you haven't an episode on Bondage. I got a guy
Speaker 1: never trying to get thought about that, we gotta do it.
Speaker 1: I never thought about that either. Just you finally get
Speaker 1: it off after hours, you can still feel it. That's
Speaker 1: like when I wear a wig. I'm gonna say, that's
Speaker 1: like how when like I get fun real good and
Speaker 1: like my stomach, I still feel like the dick in
Speaker 1: my stomach. That's how I was when on my lunchbreak.
Speaker 1: But that's how I love that. And then you went
Speaker 1: back to your spreadsheet, read those legs and that excel. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm really happy. So every episode we have this segment
Speaker 1: called Vanilla Ship, and bitch, this is a good one.
Speaker 1: I don't even gonna hold you. I just read the title.
Speaker 1: So the title for this week's Vanilla Ship is sex
Speaker 1: on first date that is important if you a serious relationship.
Speaker 1: I slept with my ex husband on the first day
Speaker 1: all of my boyfriends my boyfriendst UK article Yes so
Speaker 1: it's from mirror Um dot c O dot UK. Elicit
Speaker 1: Encounters dot com, the UK's leading dating site for married people,
Speaker 1: has shared its staggering research into sex on first dates.
Speaker 1: If you want a serious relationship, sex on the first date,
Speaker 1: It's crucial. According to new research, more than a third
Speaker 1: of men found love after sleeping with their partner on
Speaker 1: the first day, more than the third and more than
Speaker 1: accountant more than a third, no, one third more than
Speaker 1: it ship. It is whole like three sex and she
Speaker 1: can do your talk um. Fifties six percent of women
Speaker 1: have had sex with their partner after the first date.
Speaker 1: The study highlights it has led to a proper relationship
Speaker 1: for thirty six percent of women and of men. But
Speaker 1: women are slightly more weary than men of partners who
Speaker 1: want to jump into bed straight away. One in six
Speaker 1: women you want to do that? No, I'm not gonna that.
Speaker 1: They would think less of someone if they had sex
Speaker 1: on the first night, compared to eleven percent of men,
Speaker 1: which is crazy because I think men definitely care more
Speaker 1: if you have sex with them on the first night.
Speaker 1: So these these are um for you guys wanting to know.
Speaker 1: More than two thousand people were surveyed for this research.
Speaker 1: I was about to ask that I was about people.
Speaker 1: I started reading I don't want to read it, and
Speaker 1: when my old co workers gave it to me, farah
Speaker 1: why men love bitches? And I was like, oh, this
Speaker 1: but it has so many like old ideals in there
Speaker 1: that I found two game playing. There's a section on
Speaker 1: this book about making a man waiting is like going
Speaker 1: to grow his rest Steve Harvey, like growing that respect
Speaker 1: for you, and like the timeline of it, and like
Speaker 1: when you say no for the first time, make sure
Speaker 1: it's when they really wanted. And I was like, a
Speaker 1: part of me feels like this is really asinine because
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think it's old fashioned. And also,
Speaker 1: don't you want to know what the sex is like,
Speaker 1: because if it's bad, it's bad, then like, damn, you're
Speaker 1: a great person. Now you're so nice. This is why
Speaker 1: people fuck the poor boy because they waited too long
Speaker 1: where they already loved you. No, I can't be me like, yeah, see, well,
Speaker 1: I think it's also important that that is for maybe
Speaker 1: women like us or a lot of our women listeners,
Speaker 1: where sex is an important factor for them. I've met
Speaker 1: so many people like and I've even had friends where
Speaker 1: they don't understand how I can fox so much, or
Speaker 1: how casual sex happens with me, or how I can
Speaker 1: have sex with someone that I'm not even emotionally tied
Speaker 1: to like stuff like that. But it's because I genuinely
Speaker 1: like sex. So I think for maybe those individuals where
Speaker 1: they can be with someone and have bad sex at
Speaker 1: the same time, maybe having sex on the first night
Speaker 1: doesn't matter to them as much as the would us.
Speaker 1: But you know, I'm like very I have a high
Speaker 1: sex drive, but I actually am we're careful, like I've
Speaker 1: I've been in an anogamous relationship, I was an anogamous marriage,
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm very careful about energy, right, Like if
Speaker 1: I make people take off their shoes before they come
Speaker 1: into my house because not because of dirt, because of
Speaker 1: the energy that you're bringing in from from the street. Right.
Speaker 1: So if I am that crazy about shoes, like, I'm
Speaker 1: being even crazier about anything penetrating me. So I take
Speaker 1: a few dates until I find find that we're on
Speaker 1: the same synergy and we have that connection together, and
Speaker 1: if we don't, I don't think I know at the
Speaker 1: first date. All the time I can, but I'm not sure.
Speaker 1: And I think it's because I'm so like outgoing or
Speaker 1: like so extroverted that I could like anybody. That's why
Speaker 1: it takes me a few dates to see if we're
Speaker 1: really really don't you usually like And I think we
Speaker 1: often ignore this, especially women. We have a gut intuition
Speaker 1: about things or people, right, don't you immediately sort of
Speaker 1: feel something if something's off, feel it in your gut,
Speaker 1: and you know, we are taught to ignore that feeling
Speaker 1: like we're you know, we even like if they if
Speaker 1: they pull people who are serial rapists or Cereal Coast.
Speaker 1: When you when you when people you know to the
Speaker 1: victim profiling, they always say, well, there was something in
Speaker 1: my head that told me it was weird, but egg nortics,
Speaker 1: I didn't want to be rude. I didn't want to
Speaker 1: be rude. I didn't want to be impolite. But usually
Speaker 1: you kind of know instinctually things about people like absolutely energetically,
Speaker 1: So I go by that. It's only been a couple
Speaker 1: of times of the first date. But yeah, they dig energy.
Speaker 1: I'm feeling it. They your you know, well, I don't
Speaker 1: know if I want a big vagina, Why don't you
Speaker 1: want big vagina energy TV type vagina energy tight? I
Speaker 1: can't have a type vagina I mean big vagina energy.
Speaker 1: I didn't necessarily I was like, yeah, well, yeah that too.
Speaker 1: I don't know. We go sex in the City episode
Speaker 1: when she told the doctor she's like, your penis is
Speaker 1: just too small. He was like, did you ever think
Speaker 1: your vagina was too big? Yeah? Now I'm really big
Speaker 1: on on energy. So it's it's weird though, like because
Speaker 1: I don't know what dating which I don't even know
Speaker 1: what how what dating is now, especially with doing either
Speaker 1: the profiles or I'm I am revisiting a lot of
Speaker 1: past relationships and seeing if because we're in different spaces now,
Speaker 1: if maybe the time is right for us to build
Speaker 1: moving forward. So I mean with me and those are people,
Speaker 1: A lot of those people are people that I've slept with,
Speaker 1: like on the first night. I know that my last
Speaker 1: boyfriend I slept with on the first night and I
Speaker 1: was talking to his brother first and it still worked out.
Speaker 1: So I feel like with past relationships, the only reason
Speaker 1: I can't jump back in them is because I sometimes
Speaker 1: harbor those same feelings like maybe I'll get over that moment,
Speaker 1: but it's like you still did that to me, Like
Speaker 1: am I going to ever be able to get over it?
Speaker 1: I feel like new relationships it's a clean slate, like
Speaker 1: I'm not the person where you have to earn my trust.
Speaker 1: I'm that person that you start here and then you
Speaker 1: can lose it, like where some people you need to
Speaker 1: build it up, like they don't trust you at all
Speaker 1: and it takes time. Okay, So I'm the opposite. So
Speaker 1: that's why if I've already lost it, it's like I'm
Speaker 1: getting Yeah, it's hard. They say that women take like
Speaker 1: an oven take a while to heat up, but once
Speaker 1: we're off, that should have shut down. I believe that
Speaker 1: ship it's see and I guess it's just weird for
Speaker 1: me because with friendships with sexual partners, with past relationships,
Speaker 1: like I don't really end badly with many people like
Speaker 1: all to end bad, but I mean we just lose
Speaker 1: connect like you know, lose us talking or I have
Speaker 1: a lot going on so now we stopped talking, or
Speaker 1: maybe they get into something like, I don't know. I
Speaker 1: feel like we've just always pulled away because of what
Speaker 1: we both have going on in our lives, and then
Speaker 1: later we find ourselves in each other's dance again, I
Speaker 1: mean each other's You have the eyes. This girl on
Speaker 1: our show the last show we had, she was like,
Speaker 1: what do I do if I'm like I broke up
Speaker 1: with my boyfriend. I'm trying to bring all my old
Speaker 1: holds back? Like, what do I do? Man? He was like,
Speaker 1: just send the eyes, just next questions. I felt so
Speaker 1: bad that girls like, okay, it does swear it works.
Speaker 1: They see them eyes, they know what's up. I don't know.
Speaker 1: A new picture of my braids and someone sent me
Speaker 1: the eyes and I was like, they look like mine
Speaker 1: from the d C show. That's cool. I feel like
Speaker 1: I inspired you their box braids. Well, I'm just saying
Speaker 1: they're not trying O braids relaxed anyway. He literally sent
Speaker 1: me the eyes. This guy used to funk and I
Speaker 1: wrote back in all caps, No, what's kick in the Week?
Speaker 1: Starry King in the Week? For you listeners that may
Speaker 1: have never listened, or Liz, if you're not sure what
Speaker 1: it is, our kink is this basically big word that week.
Speaker 1: This wuldn't even be big hole. No, I know how
Speaker 1: to say this one. But it's also because that's right.
Speaker 1: This is only the first episode we're recording, so this
Speaker 1: is the problem. I mess up words all the time,
Speaker 1: but it's because I'm tired, and I used that we
Speaker 1: record after I do a long day of work on
Speaker 1: spreadsheet and counting and apparently dick sucking during my LUs break. Um.
Speaker 1: So the kick of the week for this week is
Speaker 1: this is so you would pick this, um, it's high
Speaker 1: growth filia. Do you want to guess what high grophilia means?
Speaker 1: Because you're smart? High growth felia? I was. I mean,
Speaker 1: immediately my mind goes to weed and hydroponics, So I'm
Speaker 1: gonna I don't know this guy. But this is also
Speaker 1: known as the liquid fetish. And no, guys, this is
Speaker 1: not where Weezy wants to be drowned. Um. If I
Speaker 1: said one time that I thought it would be hot
Speaker 1: if a guy maybe put my face in water a
Speaker 1: little bit, and now this bitch tells the whole world
Speaker 1: TV that I want to be fucking drowned. So this
Speaker 1: is actually funny because and I want to know if
Speaker 1: you have any stories about this, but um, this fetish
Speaker 1: is if you would rather avoid the wet spot on
Speaker 1: the bed, then this kink probably isn't for you. Mess
Speaker 1: fetish this enjoy the mess created by sexual fluids, both
Speaker 1: male and female fluid. They may use the fluids as
Speaker 1: loops to drink, to paint on their partners bodies, or
Speaker 1: passing it back and forth orally or snowballing. Um. I
Speaker 1: guess another part of this would be like people who
Speaker 1: like to actually after they have sex and the sheets
Speaker 1: are all wet, they like to lay on the moist
Speaker 1: or wet sheets that it can't be avoided. Right, Sometimes
Speaker 1: you're just like some bedsheet pulp. I mean I have
Speaker 1: to write that down at the episode. Well, I know
Speaker 1: you like me and like liquids. Oh, you know, like
Speaker 1: a boo cocky horr. Not that I've done it. See
Speaker 1: that sounded real, King Shamy, I'm like, I do it,
Speaker 1: but I'm like obsessed. I'm a fucking calm horror. I
Speaker 1: love that ship. A matter of fact, I'm gonna just
Speaker 1: tell you guys before because I know we didn't do
Speaker 1: the threesome episode yet, so they were fucking missionary, right,
Speaker 1: and I was sitting on her face and me and
Speaker 1: him are making out, and I fucking came right because
Speaker 1: I'm like watching them, and I guess he came watching
Speaker 1: me so right. When he did, he like takes my
Speaker 1: hair and like made me get it. I'm so fucking
Speaker 1: it was like real, this is why I can't masturbate
Speaker 1: to any other porn now, but like my own thoughts
Speaker 1: then I had to get it, and like my mouth
Speaker 1: was it was like dripping all over me. Bro. It
Speaker 1: was so fucking good in her. And I have been
Speaker 1: sucking for years, right, him and I just started sucking
Speaker 1: like last six months, and you know, I've been sucking
Speaker 1: her for so long and she has I've never seen
Speaker 1: her with a guy. She's never seen me with a guy.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, can I like pass it back
Speaker 1: and forth? It's like so much because we've never talked
Speaker 1: about it. Y'all did all of this without having We
Speaker 1: talked all the time about having these conversations about her
Speaker 1: and I didn't talk about one moment. We had an
Speaker 1: entire threesome episode. Wheezy, I need you to practice with
Speaker 1: the funk you preach. Because we talked about having conversations
Speaker 1: and guidelines and this is what we talked about. I
Speaker 1: sent to the long text. I was like, everybody put
Speaker 1: your thumbs up, her thumbs down in the group chat, blindfold, handcuffs, banking,
Speaker 1: spitting um, all kinds of ship like that. I said,
Speaker 1: spit or swallow. She was like, I don't like spitting it.
Speaker 1: I'll only swallow. I was like, okay, like text, yeah,
Speaker 1: like we're both groups like going back and front millennials.
Speaker 1: It was fun actually, so we all live in different places,
Speaker 1: so you know, they would send their thumbs up and
Speaker 1: make a new suggestion and like, I really enjoyed doing it,
Speaker 1: but this is not possible for you that right, So
Speaker 1: the only thing I guess I forgot to say is
Speaker 1: like come swapping. It just didn't come to my mind.
Speaker 1: So right when it was in my mouth and it
Speaker 1: was kind of full, I was like ribble and then
Speaker 1: they started talking to each other, but hot it. I
Speaker 1: was like, okay, so's I guess that window is gone.
Speaker 1: I'll just swallow it. But it was my mouth for
Speaker 1: like a good forty five seconds. But I was just
Speaker 1: kind of sitting there like looking like a fish. But
Speaker 1: you know, whatever, I'll take it. So I only picked
Speaker 1: this like with fetish because when I was watching boot
Speaker 1: Cockey recently, I like love looking it up. I found
Speaker 1: like the fake boot Cockey. Have you ever seen this?
Speaker 1: It's so disgusting. It's like basically these huge tubes of
Speaker 1: like come and it like looks super fake and it's
Speaker 1: just like white and gooey. It looks like slime from Nickelodeon,
Speaker 1: but white. And the girls are like their eyes are
Speaker 1: covered in it and they're like rolling all over the ground.
Speaker 1: There's like tarp on the floor. And I was like, yo,
Speaker 1: like this is just not fun. Get there. I don't
Speaker 1: want I don't want to tell you you don't want
Speaker 1: to see her search history, but people in the comments
Speaker 1: because every time I look at something weird, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I gotta see what people think of this ship. And
Speaker 1: they're so fucking into it. They're like fucking drown me
Speaker 1: and come and like that whole drowning income thing is
Speaker 1: how you get there? Okay, I guess. I mean it's
Speaker 1: gonna be a beauty product pretty soon. Yeah. There's already
Speaker 1: like beauty products that are like your own blood. You know,
Speaker 1: they have all the vampire Rihanna has the lip glass,
Speaker 1: diamond milk and looks like m Yeah, sparkly cub I
Speaker 1: think I think that's going to be the next big thing. Well,
Speaker 1: they do have and hair products. Yeah, okay, so semans
Speaker 1: for facials for sure. But if I that, I mean
Speaker 1: for mask you put you like so you'll just like
Speaker 1: put semen on your face. I mean you've done it
Speaker 1: on my teeson. It's very drying. It's very drying. It's like,
Speaker 1: you know, because my pores are huge right here. That's
Speaker 1: what the institutions. Great skin, but not like put some
Speaker 1: semen on there. I mean they didn't say that. I'm
Speaker 1: not for that fucking tube. Me need the bucket. I'd
Speaker 1: like to spend my money. If it's a lot of
Speaker 1: money on vacations, food and drugs. That's I'm not doing
Speaker 1: it with sucking beauty products. No, I think you can
Speaker 1: make your own too, Yeah, I mean maybe not with
Speaker 1: semen if that's that's what you're like, some full fat
Speaker 1: Greek yogurt and honey and if my friends days, there's
Speaker 1: got to be a recipe for this ship, a recipe
Speaker 1: for preventing wrinkles. The sperm makes skin glow, according to
Speaker 1: a new study that a man probably did it's good
Speaker 1: for the skin. The proteins and nutrients present in sperm
Speaker 1: can make your face glow and loosen and lighten those
Speaker 1: nasty looking scars. See, that's why I had it on
Speaker 1: my nick bit. You know, I was, please tell us
Speaker 1: the story while I blow my nose. No, no, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna s No, it's just a pearl necklace. Mind you.
Speaker 1: It's with the same guy who's dick I suck during
Speaker 1: lunch today. It's not so Anyways, Basically, I fucked a
Speaker 1: guy really drunk, and I didn't realize where he came.
Speaker 1: And the next morning I rushed out because I had
Speaker 1: to go have brunch, and my next started itching and
Speaker 1: apparently came all my face in my neck and so
Speaker 1: there was dried nut all in the neck and it
Speaker 1: started flaking in my friend's card. And don't mind me,
Speaker 1: that just happened. And um, we're gonna go ahead and
Speaker 1: Walwheezy goes and blows her nose. Oh, I'm sorry. We're
Speaker 1: gonna go ahead and get into our horrible decision. Now
Speaker 1: Wheezy started this weapon. Now we're going ahead and getting
Speaker 1: into our horrible decision. And I'm excited about this, um
Speaker 1: because again we haven't getting asked these questions a whole lot.
Speaker 1: What do you want to go through and say? What
Speaker 1: the horrible decision is you? Kind of? Yeah, So I
Speaker 1: wanted to make this about starting over and self love.
Speaker 1: You know, you shared that you've been married before, and
Speaker 1: you've you've have so many accomplishments in life, and I
Speaker 1: feel like sometimes men or women are bad relationships can
Speaker 1: really funk us up from our end goal and our
Speaker 1: camp and our purpose. So I wanted to dive into
Speaker 1: what what your story is, you know, just briefly, but
Speaker 1: basically the healing process after you know, how how how
Speaker 1: would you can you walk us through yours? Yeah, you
Speaker 1: know one from it. I like to advise people too.
Speaker 1: I think that's helpful. Is like even you know, sometimes
Speaker 1: like yeah, our hearts are so fucking broken, right, and
Speaker 1: people are like, well, the best way to get over
Speaker 1: to someone is to get under someone. But sometimes actually
Speaker 1: you need to reclaim your sexuality and yourself. Like so
Speaker 1: we're talking about energy, right, and like the energy that
Speaker 1: you take on. So if you're being penetrated, for example,
Speaker 1: like you're literally taking on someone else's energy and that
Speaker 1: takes a while to clear from your system. So I
Speaker 1: think like going through periods of self imposed celibacy can
Speaker 1: be really good. That can be a good thing. It's
Speaker 1: almost like a Howlett cleanser between courses of like a meal. Right.
Speaker 1: It's like kind of reclaiming your space. That doesn't mean
Speaker 1: that you can't masturbate or look at whatever you want
Speaker 1: to do, just it doesn't even mean that you can't
Speaker 1: funk around with someone else. It's just maybe meaning like
Speaker 1: not being not being penetrated by them, you know, like
Speaker 1: keeping some space for yourself. I think for me, at least,
Speaker 1: I did go through reading about that. Yeah, I went
Speaker 1: through a period of that, um you know. And I
Speaker 1: think we had Nina Hartley, who's a really famous adult
Speaker 1: star on our podcast and and she even talks about
Speaker 1: that like someone who's for a living is having sex
Speaker 1: and she's pant sexual. Yeah. I think that like that
Speaker 1: for me was a big thing kind of felt so.
Speaker 1: I mean I felt really heartbroken. It was not heartbroken.
Speaker 1: I've literally felt it in my chest like I've been
Speaker 1: fucking heartbroken. I can feel it. I'm walking around. It's heavy,
Speaker 1: and I have wanted to make myself feel better. The
Speaker 1: first thing I do is texted X of course you
Speaker 1: do because you want that immediate gratification. You want us
Speaker 1: feel like you're still desired, right, But like what are
Speaker 1: you desiring yourself? And you're looking for someone else's validation,
Speaker 1: which is and I'm the first thing I do with
Speaker 1: a breakup when my heart is like broken or I'm
Speaker 1: all right, I become really hurt by a guy. I
Speaker 1: hate all men, and so I find myself just over
Speaker 1: saturating my schedule between work, between finding something to do,
Speaker 1: hanging around friends, hitting people up, like let's too long
Speaker 1: close to dinner, let's scrab drinks and I'm just out
Speaker 1: with a lot of friends. But I actually feel like
Speaker 1: I hate man. I don't want to be hit on,
Speaker 1: I don't want to talk to men, I don't respond
Speaker 1: to like, and I just kind of clock out from
Speaker 1: even And I don't want to sit in that, because
Speaker 1: I think most of us don't want to sit in
Speaker 1: the loneliness and the fear and the vulnerability and feeling abandoned,
Speaker 1: which is why we like turn to drugs, turn to food,
Speaker 1: turned to alcohol, turned to sex. All those things are great,
Speaker 1: but like doing all those things with intention, right, not
Speaker 1: because we want to mask our loneliness, like it's okay
Speaker 1: to be lonely and feel shitty and feel fear and
Speaker 1: feel vulnerable and wake up in the middle of night
Speaker 1: and be like, am I going to die alone? Those
Speaker 1: are human questions that every single person on the planet has,
Speaker 1: you know. I feel like we all think we're alone
Speaker 1: in that that, like we're the only one that has
Speaker 1: those fears, and we all have those fears, we just
Speaker 1: don't talk about it, and it's like it's going to pass,
Speaker 1: just like the clock turns around, you know, or a
Speaker 1: wave comes in and out. We're just like, culturally so
Speaker 1: uncomfortable with that that we want to cover it up immediately.
Speaker 1: Have you, um, I don't know if you guys have
Speaker 1: ever experienced this, but a few months back, I'd say,
Speaker 1: in January, everything was just going fine. I've been making
Speaker 1: the most money I've ever made, Mandy and I are
Speaker 1: getting along, everything is fine, and I was like, I
Speaker 1: feel nothing, And it was almost worse than feeling sad,
Speaker 1: Like I had no emotion going on, because sometimes when
Speaker 1: you're in those feelings, I think it feels good to
Speaker 1: feel him. I don't know if you've felt that, like
Speaker 1: when you cried and it feels good to like let
Speaker 1: yourself go through that. And I've tried to make that
Speaker 1: my process, like when I'm feeling a lot of emotions,
Speaker 1: to actually sit and under stand when I'm feeling instead
Speaker 1: of covering it up, because what I've done in the
Speaker 1: past is text exes, go out and get sucked up,
Speaker 1: just go to something really random, go on vacation randomly
Speaker 1: with a friend, and spend too much money, and it's
Speaker 1: like then I have to sit in those feelings when
Speaker 1: I come home. So now I try to actually process them,
Speaker 1: write them down, talk about what I'm feeling, and it
Speaker 1: feels better to like go through that motion instead of
Speaker 1: covering it up. How long do you think for Let's
Speaker 1: say you were in a thirteen year relationship, but let's
Speaker 1: say someone who is going through a heartbreak of someone
Speaker 1: they just met, let's say six months or a year,
Speaker 1: They say, it takes half the time that you've been together.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I my friend Didavante, speaking of Burlesque,
Speaker 1: she had gotten divorced like just eight months before me
Speaker 1: actually to Manson, Marilyn Manson, yeah, um, and she and
Speaker 1: I would like ask her all the time, like, okay,
Speaker 1: so what's what should what should be happening now because
Speaker 1: she was like had just was sort of at every
Speaker 1: phase of the healing, like just a little bit before me.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what is it to be over? And I
Speaker 1: kept on thinking like fuck if I could invent a
Speaker 1: pill for heartbreak? Like yeah. But then the other thing
Speaker 1: is you would you think about all the great art
Speaker 1: right and music? Like thinking about all the music we
Speaker 1: listened to, Like so much of the best art and
Speaker 1: music is made from heartbreak, and it's not a lot
Speaker 1: of I mean, it's hard to make great art when
Speaker 1: you're super happy, right because you're just like living your life,
Speaker 1: like you know, everything is Love came out with you,
Speaker 1: Sat jay Z, but it wasn't lemonade, Yeah, exactly exactly.
Speaker 1: Video Remember when she smashed it's like him, I swear
Speaker 1: to God. And when we all felt that, we all
Speaker 1: empathized that we all had been in that space, right
Speaker 1: and more than like sometimes I think when people are
Speaker 1: super happy, you're like, well, I'm not fucking happy. Why
Speaker 1: they love New York because nobody's happy, don't. I saw
Speaker 1: a couple making on the subway. This is a long
Speaker 1: time ago, but I'll remember this moment. I was going
Speaker 1: to work and everybody's in a bad mood, and she's
Speaker 1: like Meani and me and the girl looked at each
Speaker 1: other like the fund is there problem? Like you're just
Speaker 1: trying to get to work and bitch, you're on this
Speaker 1: train with your fucking chip York. When I moved back
Speaker 1: to l A from New York, I remember like if
Speaker 1: someone would ask me a question, like a stranger, like
Speaker 1: where did you get your yogurt or something, I would
Speaker 1: like roll up my car window. Why are they being nice?
Speaker 1: Why are they talking to me? And the weirds really weird? Okay,
Speaker 1: so we go through the healing process. Let's say that
Speaker 1: part is over, But what do you think is a
Speaker 1: good way to get back out there? That's the question
Speaker 1: that we've been getting at a lot of our know
Speaker 1: how to answer it anymore. Yeah, so they want to know, Hey,
Speaker 1: I'm done dating, but I want to now get out
Speaker 1: and date, but I'm not looking to jump into anything else.
Speaker 1: What would be kind of your go to or any time,
Speaker 1: even if it's a process like things to start doing
Speaker 1: and get yourself out there. But like, let's just imagine
Speaker 1: someone that's been in a relationship and pretty much quarantine
Speaker 1: themselves to their boyfriend I think it's a really good
Speaker 1: idea in general to like get outside of your comfort
Speaker 1: zone own with like your scene that you're in, right, Like,
Speaker 1: I think it's really good to like maybe go, I
Speaker 1: don't know, do something you would never go do before,
Speaker 1: like take a class or like go I don't know,
Speaker 1: Like there's a million different Like you live in a
Speaker 1: city like New York, there's a million different scenes that
Speaker 1: you're not part of, and you kind of get stuck
Speaker 1: in your rold and you think, oh, I just meet
Speaker 1: the same people and everyone's the same as the same
Speaker 1: type of person. But like if you just force yourself
Speaker 1: to get outside of your comfort zone a little bit,
Speaker 1: Basically I should go to Brooklyn. I was able to say, Basically,
Speaker 1: I gotta go where white people go in the house
Speaker 1: you think, yes, you'll see me there. Actually, to be
Speaker 1: frank with you, I when I first moved to New York,
Speaker 1: I was going on meat packing, right, and I just
Speaker 1: I felt like I was meeting too many of the
Speaker 1: same guys. I was like, you know what, the time
Speaker 1: of the black club, I'm done. And that was literally
Speaker 1: what I had to do. And it wasn't like I
Speaker 1: was not going to black clubs on purpose. I was
Speaker 1: just so into that meat packing like high life, like
Speaker 1: you know, your twenty dollar martinis. I love that ship.
Speaker 1: It took me getting a little bit lower east Side,
Speaker 1: a mixed dive bar kind of vibe, heading out to
Speaker 1: Brooklyn doing different type of parties to be like, oh,
Speaker 1: like I'm fine now I'm making new friends and then
Speaker 1: I could go back and be okay. But I was
Speaker 1: seeing the same people. When you see those same people,
Speaker 1: even the same women, it really was reminders of the
Speaker 1: person I was dating, and I hated that ship. Also
Speaker 1: think you should ask random people to set you up,
Speaker 1: like people who are not necessarily your immediate best friend,
Speaker 1: but like I don't know. It could be a coworker,
Speaker 1: like no, but you never you never know, and it
Speaker 1: might not be that person. It could be like a
Speaker 1: friend of that person, or like they could take you
Speaker 1: to a party, like one person's trash is another person's treasure, right.
Speaker 1: I didn't even think about that. I mean, when we're
Speaker 1: so used to not being set up because this is
Speaker 1: not our I got so many niggers already, it's like
Speaker 1: more like I do I know, Like so that's another
Speaker 1: thing with me, Like I don't know if it's I
Speaker 1: don't call it fear, and a few people were in
Speaker 1: like that. They also revisit the past with people. But
Speaker 1: the time it takes to get to know someone and
Speaker 1: allowing new energy feels like more way, more work than
Speaker 1: me just going back to someone who I'm familiar with.
Speaker 1: But you're talking about for sucks, right, No, both like
Speaker 1: relationships like niggas is free agents and retired now they're
Speaker 1: not playing and traveling the like athletes. The one I'm
Speaker 1: talking to was former football thank you, but um like,
Speaker 1: so they're also in a different space in their life. Also,
Speaker 1: back when I was dealing with these guys, I was
Speaker 1: either living in Atlanta or Miami. I was a bartender,
Speaker 1: I was in the fast life, so like I was
Speaker 1: viewed differently to them than where I am now. Like
Speaker 1: I have my ship together, I still don't have kids.
Speaker 1: I'm like kids, so that's also out of space where
Speaker 1: I'm able to really I feel like you you said
Speaker 1: I never I've never said I. You've used the word family.
Speaker 1: You never use the word kids here, and I'm talking
Speaker 1: about a dog or a finger monkey, bitch. I've been
Speaker 1: looking up finger monkeys. Finger I want a little finger
Speaker 1: monkey like I follow these these finger monkeys on Instagram
Speaker 1: called Diddy and Kong. They are so cute and finger monkey,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna show you they're real cute. So that's what
Speaker 1: you want, not like a dog, like a dog, I
Speaker 1: really do want. Like we're looking this up first, thank you,
Speaker 1: Here we go. We're good. Look up real Diddy call.
Speaker 1: Look they got a million followers. Pretty don't marry cute actually,
Speaker 1: so I want a finger monkey and these are like
Speaker 1: the little bigger monkey. Where do you keep these nails?
Speaker 1: Look like they might scratch though, Man, I'm gonna get
Speaker 1: about a pedicure, but no, like in my mind, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna lie. So with talking to a lot of
Speaker 1: these men, they do have children already, and a lot
Speaker 1: of them because they got multiple A lot of them
Speaker 1: doesn't cut their dicks now like they're snipped now you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, you know the word the sect
Speaker 1: me there you go, come on, you know what. So
Speaker 1: like now they can't have like babies, and so now
Speaker 1: it is to where like I think even for a
Speaker 1: lot of them because of where they are with money wise,
Speaker 1: power wise, like it's it's a genuine thing, like I
Speaker 1: ain't trying to have no baby, like just to keep
Speaker 1: you like it's a genuine connection. They're in different spaces
Speaker 1: in their life. So I believe in timing, and I think,
Speaker 1: I don't know if that's a good thing or bad thing.
Speaker 1: I guess while we're talking about time that it takes
Speaker 1: to heal, I believe in timing of meeting people. I
Speaker 1: believe in I believe in meeting people, and sometimes it's
Speaker 1: just the wrong time. It may work. Damn, I wish
Speaker 1: I met you at a later time in life or
Speaker 1: sooner in life before you know things happened. So to
Speaker 1: me and a space where I genuinely feel like I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do. I'm in a new bubble, I'm in a
Speaker 1: new career. I'm we have this podcast where it's taken
Speaker 1: off and I'm traveling and I'm in this creative space.
Speaker 1: I genuinely feel like I'm in a new space that
Speaker 1: I can provide something different in a relationship that I
Speaker 1: could as you being in a new space and you
Speaker 1: doing what you want to do and investing your energy
Speaker 1: fully into it is what brings people into your orbit.
Speaker 1: I truly believe sometimes to look for it, it's not
Speaker 1: gonna come. But the second that you're like busy and
Speaker 1: focus on whatever it is that you're doing. All of
Speaker 1: a sudden, it's like the universe is just sending you
Speaker 1: sell people. Right, It's funny you mentioned that, Like, so
Speaker 1: probably for the last four or five years, I've been
Speaker 1: talking about wanting to have a boyfriend and a girlfriend,
Speaker 1: or being a threatle or whatever. And I never thought
Speaker 1: that the two people I would sleep be sleeping with
Speaker 1: would be it. And like when I tell you, it
Speaker 1: was so intense at one point, like I almost woke
Speaker 1: up and started crying. Of course I'm emotional, but I
Speaker 1: was like, damn, I didn't think I would feel like this.
Speaker 1: I thought we were just gonna have sex and eat
Speaker 1: Like I thought this is gonna be it. I didn't
Speaker 1: think we'd be holding hands and touching each other's faces
Speaker 1: and planning the next vacation while we're still sitting together,
Speaker 1: you know. And it was like really really intense. And
Speaker 1: my mom was like, you manifested this for so long,
Speaker 1: even looking at these two people, like maybe you and
Speaker 1: him weren't like that, maybe you and her weren't like that,
Speaker 1: but like together now you can become something because it's
Speaker 1: just been waiting for you. There she was like, you
Speaker 1: probably weren't trying to have it like you were the
Speaker 1: last few years. Anytime I would a girl, I'd be like,
Speaker 1: you should meet this guy and we should be a thing.
Speaker 1: What happened like that? So that's interesting that you said
Speaker 1: you can really actually bring it into your orbit, because
Speaker 1: I kind of feel like I did. I really am
Speaker 1: like super nervous because it felt so great, and I'm
Speaker 1: just like ships will let down of two people, not
Speaker 1: just one now if it doesn't work. Yeah, but don't
Speaker 1: future funk yourself. So like was like, okay, so we're
Speaker 1: talking about, like if we're talking about being in the
Speaker 1: moment and being present, most of us are constantly future
Speaker 1: fucking ourselves, Like we're going into like what could happen,
Speaker 1: what will happen, like what might happen? And we're like,
Speaker 1: you know, the more that you put your mindset there,
Speaker 1: you bring it in instead of being like right here,
Speaker 1: right now, you're future fucking yourself. But it's so something
Speaker 1: to where And I think a lot of us do
Speaker 1: that with dating or meeting someone. We have this vision
Speaker 1: of what we want this person to do, how we
Speaker 1: want them to actually want them to answer our text messages,
Speaker 1: how we want to wake up in the morning to
Speaker 1: them what we hope our conversations to be to where
Speaker 1: we set ourselves up to these expectations, and as soon
Speaker 1: as that person doesn't live up to the expectations, now
Speaker 1: we're disappointed. And once you're disappointed, then you're like, okay,
Speaker 1: well then he's not it. Let me move on to
Speaker 1: the next. But we are expecting someone else to give
Speaker 1: us every single thing. It's just not like, okay, we
Speaker 1: can We're never going to get every single thing from
Speaker 1: one person. That's just not possible. Do you think you
Speaker 1: can give that? You can't. You can't be someone's like
Speaker 1: love or partner, best friend. You've got to find those
Speaker 1: things in other in other people. You've got to find
Speaker 1: it in yourself. So let really like the person that
Speaker 1: you're having that intimate romantic relationship with that's like you know,
Speaker 1: you accept them for what it is. Let me ask you,
Speaker 1: you said your monogamous damn use in my mind, because
Speaker 1: that was my next question. We always say we use
Speaker 1: that as a reason, but I I really appreciate monogamous
Speaker 1: right now. Yeah, Well that doesn't mean like maybe I
Speaker 1: don't know the question. So we we use this as
Speaker 1: a like exactly what you say compartmentalizing relationships and people
Speaker 1: and friends. Right, I need a friend I want to
Speaker 1: go out with for this and that you're saying that
Speaker 1: and able to understand that concept. But you're still monogamous.
Speaker 1: So how do you do it then? Because I don't
Speaker 1: necessarily expect my partner who I'm sleeping with to give
Speaker 1: me everything, right, Like, I still I'm a creative person,
Speaker 1: and I think you, like, if you're doing anything creative,
Speaker 1: there's gonna be some vibes or energy with people you're
Speaker 1: creating with. I flirt with everybody under the sun, and mean,
Speaker 1: like I have a company that's called The Sex Said,
Speaker 1: I'm talking about sex with other people all day long.
Speaker 1: I can you know I'm flirting with you guys over here,
Speaker 1: Like I don't know, I get energy from a lot
Speaker 1: of people. So when I'm with him, like you know, also,
Speaker 1: it's constantly evolving. You know, it's not like perfect. We
Speaker 1: have our ship and we we talk about it and
Speaker 1: we're both trying to evolve into like what we want
Speaker 1: this relationship to be and the certain limited expectations that
Speaker 1: each of us have and can give. Like, I mean,
Speaker 1: nobody's perfect. But you don't have to. You're saying you
Speaker 1: don't your your into creative ship, but you don't need
Speaker 1: that from him. I do. I mean I get a
Speaker 1: lot of stuff from him, but I also don't expect that,
Speaker 1: like he's going to give me satisfy every single one
Speaker 1: of my needs. I like that a lot because I
Speaker 1: think sometimes the pressure of making sure this perfect partner
Speaker 1: when really you don't have to do it all, Like
Speaker 1: just because you're sucking me doesn't mean you still can't
Speaker 1: have someone else in your life. For or for example,
Speaker 1: like he's very he's like super alpha, and he's not
Speaker 1: like I've always dated artists before who were like I love,
Speaker 1: you know, really flowery with the words and stuff. And
Speaker 1: he's like he's really solid. He's really there. But he's
Speaker 1: not going to do that because that's just not who
Speaker 1: he is. And like I you know, it's like sometimes
Speaker 1: it drives me crazy, but then I'm like, all right,
Speaker 1: I'm not going to get that from him. But I
Speaker 1: can count on him, you know, I can count on
Speaker 1: him where I've had like a million guys like right
Speaker 1: fucking love letters and like send flowers all the time
Speaker 1: and like, but they're not really necessarily like the solid guys,
Speaker 1: I like it a lot like that. Being there from
Speaker 1: someone's a lot of fucking work. Yeah, you just have
Speaker 1: to realize where people are coming from, too, and how
Speaker 1: they were brought up in condition and what kind of
Speaker 1: loved relationship they've had, like with their parents for example.
Speaker 1: Like has a lot to do with the way we
Speaker 1: relate to each other in relationships, because it's basically like
Speaker 1: we're constantly trying to recreate the relationship with the parent
Speaker 1: we had the most difficulty with as a child, like unconsciously, unconsciously,
Speaker 1: that's who we pick, really, yeah, in order to recreate
Speaker 1: and heal those relationships. Like that's why I like tall
Speaker 1: n like, I like tall lights, king guys, I like
Speaker 1: everything opposite from my dad. Is that who you had
Speaker 1: like the most difficult relationship with? Actually it was both
Speaker 1: of them, as me and my mom are friends now,
Speaker 1: but growing up me and my mom, But it has
Speaker 1: a lot. But as I got an older, I see
Speaker 1: it's because we were a lot. There's something to be
Speaker 1: said what you look for in men and how she
Speaker 1: was saying, like you picked someone like them. Mandy is
Speaker 1: always saying she likes affluent men because her dad wasn't
Speaker 1: as helpful and when she was a kid. So that
Speaker 1: is kind of making sure that you're trying to fix
Speaker 1: what was better. You're trying to fix your childhood basically.
Speaker 1: The um. But I guess that makes sense. I know,
Speaker 1: I hear it. I wait, well, I want to get
Speaker 1: into orgasm breathing before you want him to want them
Speaker 1: to a clip of us. Well, with the orgasm, you'll
Speaker 1: do it. Okay, So with the orgasm breathing, I want
Speaker 1: to do that, and then I do want to gauge
Speaker 1: some of your knowledge a little bit for our homemale section. Um,
Speaker 1: this is your home section. Do you want to do
Speaker 1: orgasm breathing? First? Let's do orgasm breathing. You got to
Speaker 1: be in the shot. I'm like so fucked up from
Speaker 1: this cold right now, it's just all the traveling. I
Speaker 1: need to get myself together. Okay, what the fund is
Speaker 1: orgasm breathing. So, orgasm breathing is a technique where you
Speaker 1: can bring yourself to orgasm hands free, just with breathing
Speaker 1: and using your public floor muscles. Don't believe you, but
Speaker 1: I've heard it. Yeah, everyone can do it, no matter
Speaker 1: what kind of genitals you have. Okay, do it, so
Speaker 1: like you know what your public floor muscles are, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've done public floor therapy before. Okay, So like, well
Speaker 1: for listeners who aren't familiar with it, right, it's the
Speaker 1: muscles that you contract when you're trying to stop your
Speaker 1: flow of p. So if you've got a penis, contract
Speaker 1: that muscle. If you've got a vagina, if that contract
Speaker 1: that muscle. Yeah, it's it's just it's basically the same thing, right,
Speaker 1: So they're your PC muscles. So you the breath is
Speaker 1: two parts, right, so we know what that squeezing that
Speaker 1: muscles like. Right, So, and then the breath is imagine
Speaker 1: you're sucking in through a straw, so your lips are
Speaker 1: like so at the bottom of that breath, imagine it
Speaker 1: traveling up from from the shorter generals. No, I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna be long. So as soon as I start sucking
Speaker 1: the breath, I'm gonna squeeze, and I'm gonna stay squeeze,
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna go And I'm still squeezing this whole time,
Speaker 1: and I'm slowly ship too much out and you're vagina,
Speaker 1: I'm still squeezing. Your kegels are squeezed. Still squeezing this
Speaker 1: whole time, and then at the bottom of my breath
Speaker 1: I released, I released the kegle. So does that make sense?
Speaker 1: Does that make sense? You're like, you're squeezing your muscles
Speaker 1: from the bottom of the breath up holding holding the
Speaker 1: squeeze and slowly so squeezing the muscle. By the way,
Speaker 1: for those listeners who have never really worked their kegle
Speaker 1: muscles before, I would saying keegle ship whatever, kegle keegele.
Speaker 1: So it feels like if you try to stop that
Speaker 1: pe like hold it, you can do it right now.
Speaker 1: I'm doing mine right now, feeling like holding it like
Speaker 1: like if you're paid, if you're like But by the way,
Speaker 1: it's really are you squeezing if you don't want to
Speaker 1: have a loose bladder when you're older, By the way,
Speaker 1: it's very important if you're talking about a tight vagina,
Speaker 1: which is a myth, by the way, I don't want
Speaker 1: to perpetuate. But if you do want to have control
Speaker 1: over your bladder when you're older, it's super important to
Speaker 1: practice your kegles. And it's also really helpful for multiple orgasms.
Speaker 1: What about the balls like that you can put in
Speaker 1: your vagina like the I didn't know what you're asking.
Speaker 1: I was like, please, God, don't let her think you
Speaker 1: have a fucking your ether in your ball. Yeah, people
Speaker 1: like men. While the woman who bettany Vernon is her name,
Speaker 1: who had bondage with she does beautiful ben Wall balls.
Speaker 1: Also some people like you know, I mean, I think,
Speaker 1: like the whole Yoni egg thing, how do they help
Speaker 1: your pussy? Then, well, it gives you. It's also like
Speaker 1: it's the same thing. It's muscle control, which you can
Speaker 1: do like you know, like I'm doing right now. So
Speaker 1: just having awareness of you. I've never been the Pussy Show,
Speaker 1: and I went in there before and the very first
Speaker 1: trick that was going on was this girl asked the
Speaker 1: guy at the bar what his name was, and she
Speaker 1: took a marker, put it in her pussy and literally
Speaker 1: wrote his name on a sheet of paper with the
Speaker 1: marker in her pussy. I've had muscle control. You haven't
Speaker 1: seen like mommy who can lift weights with her she
Speaker 1: can like lift word with her vaginas. That's crazy. But
Speaker 1: then why are they older? You think? Why are they older? Girl?
Speaker 1: The same way why sex gets better when you get
Speaker 1: older because your body your body. If you know your
Speaker 1: body and you don't feel like you give yourself permission.
Speaker 1: I will say when I worked in Miami, Uncle Luke
Speaker 1: would have holes up there playing Corona bottles in the
Speaker 1: Pussy Girl. I remember those videos. It was so lit
Speaker 1: Uncle Lucas like from two Life prop like every single word,
Speaker 1: every song. My mother threw the cassette tape out of
Speaker 1: the window of the cart. There's only one place where
Speaker 1: you were. So because you are, I would like to say,
Speaker 1: a sexpert, and you have the sex ed show and
Speaker 1: the sex ed domain because you was on it. Um.
Speaker 1: I want to get into our home mail session before
Speaker 1: we get out of here, and the question from this
Speaker 1: is am I still a virgin? Hi? Ladies. First of all,
Speaker 1: I'm a big fan and love listening to your podcast.
Speaker 1: So I am or was a twenty nine year old
Speaker 1: virgin until recently. I got into a relationship and things
Speaker 1: just kind of happened and next thing you know, we
Speaker 1: are having sex, or so I thought. I have never
Speaker 1: had sex, so I am not sure. However, it felt
Speaker 1: painful when he first went inside, but after I did
Speaker 1: not feel much pain and honestly was expecting to fill
Speaker 1: my hymen break and was next expecting to see blood.
Speaker 1: None of that happened. To make things worse, he asked
Speaker 1: me if I was really a virgin, which hurt my feelings.
Speaker 1: Now I am not variance, but it's not rocket science
Speaker 1: to know if a dude has a big or small dick,
Speaker 1: which he is on the smaller side, is it possible
Speaker 1: that he is too short to reach my hyman? Since then,
Speaker 1: we have tried five more times. The same thing happened
Speaker 1: her upon entering and felt nothing after that. I don't
Speaker 1: even feel like I have had sex. How do I
Speaker 1: bring this up? Is this normal? Please? Help? First of all,
Speaker 1: it's totally normal. It's totally normal. And like, this whole
Speaker 1: idea of virginity really bothers me too, because what is virginity?
Speaker 1: And like, does virginity mean you have to have sex
Speaker 1: between a penis and a vagina to totally not be
Speaker 1: a virgin? Myman can break while riding a bike, they
Speaker 1: say a lot of people over twenty. I think I
Speaker 1: was reading this somewhere. I don't know if it's twenty
Speaker 1: years old or a different age, but I have already
Speaker 1: lost it somewhere another around the way. So like, even
Speaker 1: if they haven't had sex, yet you may not have
Speaker 1: that big old break, right, and also like did you
Speaker 1: have that idea, just the idea that like, well what
Speaker 1: about if you have anal sex or if oral sex
Speaker 1: or fingering like all of those things, like the idea
Speaker 1: in middle school, Like the hose of middle school will
Speaker 1: go around and say they still haven't had sex, but
Speaker 1: they had an on and they just blew everyone off
Speaker 1: like they just sucked their dick, and so they you've broken.
Speaker 1: But a lot of like a lot of people who
Speaker 1: are like fourteen year olds now are like having anal
Speaker 1: sex instead of any that's because they feel like it's
Speaker 1: preserving their virginity. That's so crazy, feeling like I started
Speaker 1: to say that as I got over, like I'm gonna say,
Speaker 1: I asked for my husband is really just my excuse
Speaker 1: to not sucking the ass. But well, I don't think
Speaker 1: I have anything left to save for my husband, So
Speaker 1: I hope my husband isn't worried about say I haven't
Speaker 1: been fucked. Oh I haven't gagged anyone with my foot,
Speaker 1: but I do have a proposition for that. So unless
Speaker 1: he comes from the brain, my husband may not be
Speaker 1: able to do that either. What it's left like an
Speaker 1: ear fun like he got knees or something behind the knees. Yeah,
Speaker 1: pet oh my god, okay like that interviewed, he was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: And every time I posted a picture like this in
Speaker 1: my bed, he always he's like, yo, they look a
Speaker 1: good Well okay, so I like, I like that. Do
Speaker 1: you have any advice for she's still a version? I mean, listen,
Speaker 1: I don't know what happened to your hyman or where
Speaker 1: it is, but like, you definitely had sex if it
Speaker 1: went in there. Sure he might not be big enough
Speaker 1: for you, but absolutely not. You're not still a virgin.
Speaker 1: Just just listen, did it go in if it did? Know,
Speaker 1: I think the whole blood seeing thing is kind of stupid,
Speaker 1: and I'm sorry that you know. This is how unsure
Speaker 1: I was about that you were waiting for this big reveal.
Speaker 1: Dick just pushed my period on because I definitely led
Speaker 1: like right after I did too. Yeah. So but I
Speaker 1: thought I had sex with Yeah I was and it
Speaker 1: went right. Yeah, So it's very possible that girl. Maybe
Speaker 1: you did a split, you know, to get but you
Speaker 1: know what that's like. When I do talks um and
Speaker 1: people ask questions and audience, the number one thing that
Speaker 1: people approach me privately about our virgins in their twenties,
Speaker 1: because I think also culturally we shame people for not
Speaker 1: having sex, which is crazy. It's like, where where does
Speaker 1: this come from? Where is this law that you and
Speaker 1: great for you? Like, whatever you want, however you want
Speaker 1: to consider your sexuality or yourself is all okay. As
Speaker 1: long as you're not hurting yourself or someone else. It's
Speaker 1: all okay. Animals or animals or dead people or kid. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I do want to like, let's do two more minutes,
Speaker 1: but I just really want to know. We have this question.
Speaker 1: A lot girl came out to us at Houston show
Speaker 1: and asked me about her virginity and how do I
Speaker 1: get out there? I want to lose my virginia over
Speaker 1: What kind of advice would you have for them? Well,
Speaker 1: first of all, I'll be like, why do you do
Speaker 1: you want to lose it because you want to lose
Speaker 1: it or because you think you should lose it because
Speaker 1: everyone says you're supposed to lose it, And like, really
Speaker 1: think about that, because it's such a personal choice. You
Speaker 1: want to make sure you're doing things because you want
Speaker 1: to do That is what we preach on this show.
Speaker 1: So like, I feel like as kind of sex liberators
Speaker 1: and how we talk about women really even having sex
Speaker 1: because you want to have an orgasm or you want
Speaker 1: to enjoy it, and not to have sex because a
Speaker 1: man just wants to have sex with you. I feel
Speaker 1: like the virgins that listen to this show should definitely
Speaker 1: take that bit of advice and really hone in on
Speaker 1: why do you want to lose your virginity and don't
Speaker 1: just go out there looking for anna lose your virginity
Speaker 1: for it. When yeah, when I had like celibate periods,
Speaker 1: I had so many friends just be like you should
Speaker 1: just be having sex and you're going to get cobwebs
Speaker 1: down there, and like no, people really didn't understand, you know.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm fucking liberated, you know, Like I've
Speaker 1: got my little my, you know, sex toy. I've got
Speaker 1: done it in different times of different breakups, for different
Speaker 1: different periods, and I've known other people have done it.
Speaker 1: I'm like, why are you trying to shame me? Why
Speaker 1: are you trying to shame me? Like just the same
Speaker 1: problem as slush shaming and its virgin shaming, So you
Speaker 1: should just like stop with this. People And they want
Speaker 1: to do with their bodies. I like that. I like that.
Speaker 1: So before we get out of here, let our listeners
Speaker 1: know what you have coming up where they can find
Speaker 1: you and all your social media handles and all that
Speaker 1: cool stuff. All right, Well, we have a new season
Speaker 1: of The Sex Said podcast which I host, coming out
Speaker 1: next week I guess like the day day or two
Speaker 1: after this. Wherever you stream podcasts where the sex Said?
Speaker 1: On Instagram where the Sex Said. Our website is the
Speaker 1: sex Said dot com and my personal instagram is Goldilocks.
Speaker 1: G yeah, look for the Blue what's that episode that?
Speaker 1: I love that? I think that's such a good place
Speaker 1: to start. What was that Loue Paget episode? Blue Paget
Speaker 1: does really has really good tips for con Lingus and Flacio,
Speaker 1: and I think so that will work for literally all
Speaker 1: of our listeners. So yeah, it was very listeners for
Speaker 1: the women listen no matter what. How okay, good, no,
Speaker 1: thank you so much coming out. I hope you guys
Speaker 1: all enjoyed this episode. As you guys know, because of
Speaker 1: you guys, we are able to go on tour. We
Speaker 1: have l a we get and I can go laughing
Speaker 1: to get hot school. God, I'm a light enough to
Speaker 1: dig and ship, but I'm not getting I'm scared. Oh
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get high, but I'm probably gonna only get
Speaker 1: high like once day night and then I'm gonna stop
Speaker 1: by Friday because i can't be high on the weekend.
Speaker 1: But staying in the Beverly and let me just tell
Speaker 1: you the first time I'm saying now, I'm not I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: She wants the fans. I'm not just putting what hotel
Speaker 1: I'm staying. It's super bouge. Nobody could get in, right,
Speaker 1: they block it out of it. So wait, because I'm
Speaker 1: staying there last time, like, oh, this is really nice
Speaker 1: and it was Grammy weekend so they did that biggest
Speaker 1: party there and Ship fucking Oprah everybody, right, So I'm
Speaker 1: like wanting to smoke weed, but I don't want to
Speaker 1: be like tacky and all of these times and like
Speaker 1: suits are fucking smoking weed and Ship and I'm like, here,
Speaker 1: I am. I was being ghetto with Ship and I'm like, OK,
Speaker 1: so just say we got like less than ten tickets
Speaker 1: left for our second show. I do want to shout
Speaker 1: out to everyone coming on May twelve on Mother's Day,
Speaker 1: but we we got you know, star set a event
Speaker 1: motherfucker planned out f y'all and motherfucking l a. So
Speaker 1: see you guys at the Hollywood Improv and then sorry
Speaker 1: for you guys, UM in Toronto. Toronto is sold the
Speaker 1: funk out bitch, so that'll be will be there May eighteenth,
Speaker 1: and that will wrap up our tour. Also, once again,
Speaker 1: we want to shout out all of our patrons. Because
Speaker 1: of you guys, this tour is possible. So if you
Speaker 1: guys have not yet become a patron, for five dollars
Speaker 1: a month, you get three bonus episodes and at the
Speaker 1: top tier of fifteen dollars a month, you guys will
Speaker 1: get merch after four months. UM, we've been sending those
Speaker 1: out and I think we're actually gonna start on working
Speaker 1: on what socks and mugs and a whole bunch of
Speaker 1: little extra other other things for so UM. If you
Speaker 1: guys haven't yet UM checked that out. Because we are
Speaker 1: a teen plus on Patreon, you can find us at
Speaker 1: www dot patreon dot com. Backslash Horrible Decisions, You guys
Speaker 1: know how to spell. Again, we want to shout out
Speaker 1: to Adam and Eve, who is our sponsored for this
Speaker 1: week's episode, and as always We're gonna leave you with
Speaker 1: a five minute clip of one of our bonus episodes.
Speaker 1: If you like it, check it out, become a patron
Speaker 1: support the show. And once again this has been he
Speaker 1: had another episode of Horrible Decisions by so y'all all like, Elder,
Speaker 1: So when you when you pop your when'd you pop
Speaker 1: your cherry? Wow? Because you know from the South, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I may, I may or may not have been like
Speaker 1: nineteen wow. You know I want you held out longer
Speaker 1: than it really. Yeah, yeah, I can tell you I
Speaker 1: don't love. I don't love. I don't love that. I
Speaker 1: can tell y'all fast. Let me because at one point
Speaker 1: in high school, me and my two female best friends,
Speaker 1: Selma and Janet, we had a like a celebratory pact,
Speaker 1: so we were like, we're not going to have sex
Speaker 1: to eighteen, and that's so we're gonna, like, you know,
Speaker 1: stick to it. And I had a very close sexual
Speaker 1: account or the female kind ones. And that's my questions
Speaker 1: for you. Well, I'm about to answer it. And I
Speaker 1: got there, it looked down at it. It was like
Speaker 1: there's a pack that I made. I can't believe I'm
Speaker 1: seeing this. I was like, there's a pack that I made. Um,
Speaker 1: So I can't do this, but I would love to
Speaker 1: be your friend call me. Didn't she know you were gay? No,
Speaker 1: of course not. I was real like hetero in high school.
Speaker 1: So what she looked like she was? Actually? No, why
Speaker 1: she gotta be white? I don't know. Do I look
Speaker 1: like a white girl type of guy? Oh? My god?
Speaker 1: You know that's why other that's why you got that look. No,
Speaker 1: she was a complete ebony goddess princess. She was a
Speaker 1: little bit darker than you, Like I was about to say,
Speaker 1: like she had to be a lot of that because
Speaker 1: wheezy white. First of all, Mandy, I'm just saying you
Speaker 1: talked about the ebony goddess present did say a little
Speaker 1: bit lot of You just want to say at black
Speaker 1: and Middle Eastern may that's fine. That ain't white. You
Speaker 1: sound sound good, bit sound good just because you said
Speaker 1: your god damn DNA and you probably got somebody else.
Speaker 1: You want to believe that I do that. I can't
Speaker 1: do this one. You want to mean, I don't believe it.
Speaker 1: Like the government has already followed me, and they just
Speaker 1: tell you flies, bro, They just tell you what they want.
Speaker 1: People lie everything. People, Yes, They imagine if you thought
Speaker 1: your daddy was something. You're like, I don't see any
Speaker 1: bit of well you don't I'm part Chinese, so that
Speaker 1: you couldn't wait to say that I am. People say that, No,
Speaker 1: I mean my eyes are a little, a little, However,
Speaker 1: I really am my great grandfa No, my grandfather actually
Speaker 1: was from Canton, China,