Speaker 1: This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 1: Chris Harrison coming to you from the home office in Austin, Texas.
Speaker 1: I am so excited for this show. Today I did
Speaker 1: a Father's Day episode of the most dramatic podcast ever
Speaker 1: where I had on three really good friends of mine
Speaker 1: and three great dads, Ryan Sutter, Bob Ginny, and JP Rosenbaum.
Speaker 1: Obviously they were from my days on The Bachelor and Bachelorette,
Speaker 1: just three dads that I really respected and kind of
Speaker 1: from different walks of life, in different stages of life,
Speaker 1: and it just made me realize I have not really
Speaker 1: talked to JP Rosenbaum and I don't know how long.
Speaker 1: It's been way too long to catch up, and I
Speaker 1: really wanted to know where he is at this stage.
Speaker 1: He's been divorced from Ashley. They met on season seven
Speaker 1: of The Bacherette, which is crazy to think it was
Speaker 1: that long ago Season seven of The Bachelorette, Ashley Rosenbaum.
Speaker 1: We were in Fiji, they got engaged. It was this
Speaker 1: beautiful moment. I actually officiated their wedding. We televised it
Speaker 1: in Pasadena and it was a It was a It
Speaker 1: was a lovely wedding and a beautiful couple, and I
Speaker 1: was very good friends with them, especially when they lived
Speaker 1: in New York. I saw them all the time. Anytime
Speaker 1: I went to New York, they were my go to
Speaker 1: dinner dates, always saw them. And then they moved down
Speaker 1: to Florida. Unfortunately, life happens, they got divorced, and I
Speaker 1: remain close to both of them. You know, It's one
Speaker 1: of the first things I did, as I called and
Speaker 1: texted both of them as I love you both, I
Speaker 1: know what you're going through. I've been there, and I'm
Speaker 1: here to support you and anything that both of you need,
Speaker 1: you just say it. And so we've we've all remained
Speaker 1: really good friends, and they've been very classy and just
Speaker 1: wonderful how they have gone through the whole process of
Speaker 1: divorce and starting their lives again. And you know, Ashley
Speaker 1: very publicly happy and dating again, and Jp, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know where he is at this stage in
Speaker 1: this process of getting on with divorce and getting on
Speaker 1: with life and dating and love and all of those things.
Speaker 1: And I thought, if I don't know, then you probably
Speaker 1: don't know. So let's fix that. Let's dive into it.
Speaker 1: My guest today on the Most Traumatic Podcast Effort, my
Speaker 1: good friend JP Rosenbaumb, fresh off vacation. We saw on
Speaker 1: your social media, Jp Rosenbaumb, good to see you, buddy.
Speaker 2: It is thank you for having me. We are way
Speaker 2: we passed you to catch up.
Speaker 1: I know we keep saying that eventually. You know what,
Speaker 1: So here's the thing. I have a baby being born.
Speaker 1: It's not mine, thankfully, no, but we have a baby
Speaker 1: that right this. I wanted to drop this on the
Speaker 1: podcast with you. We have a baby being born in
Speaker 1: the family. No, Lauren's sister is prego and she's giving
Speaker 1: birth very soon. So I'm going to be in the
Speaker 1: general area and I'm like, you know what, They're not
Speaker 1: gonna want me around the house all the time. I
Speaker 1: want to be there to see the baby. I'm going
Speaker 1: to be an uncle again. I'm really good at that.
Speaker 1: And then I'm going to just disappear and I'm going
Speaker 1: to go on a day fishing trip with JP's No,
Speaker 1: this is going to happen this fall. I'm going to
Speaker 1: tell you the baby's coming, and this is middle of fall.
Speaker 1: I'm going to come find you.
Speaker 2: Okay, I need a little advance notice because.
Speaker 1: I know you got kids. You got kids?
Speaker 2: How are the kids? I'm talking about booking the right
Speaker 2: fishing trip.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm talking about. That is so this is
Speaker 1: going to happen because we do we you know what.
Speaker 1: I'm at the stage of my life and I am
Speaker 1: seventy two years old now, but I am at the
Speaker 1: stage in my life. How old are you now? I
Speaker 1: really don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm not far behind you.
Speaker 1: Forty seven, forty seven? Okay, so I got you by
Speaker 1: like four or five years. But I just turned fifty
Speaker 1: three and I'm not gonna lie. I don't really care
Speaker 1: about getting older. But I'm like, my fifty three that
Speaker 1: really seems odd to me. But I'm getting to the
Speaker 1: stage in my life where I got to quit promising
Speaker 1: stuff and we got to start doing.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Do you have a lot of friends
Speaker 1: like that? Because I do. I have very good friends
Speaker 1: who I grew up with, and they are masterfully successful
Speaker 1: at what they do in their financial field or entrepreneurs
Speaker 1: or building businesses, whatever it is. And we're like, when
Speaker 1: this happens, we'll do this. And I'm like, guys, what
Speaker 1: will happen next? Is We're going to go to someone's funeral.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think there's always an excuse not to do
Speaker 2: things right. And you think you always have enough time,
Speaker 2: There's always going to be enough time. Yeah, but there isn't.
Speaker 2: There never is no, So just do just do.
Speaker 1: Yeah, tomorrow has promised to no one. And I really
Speaker 1: have tried to be better, especially with Lauren and my kids,
Speaker 1: just like, hey, do you want I'm a yes, yes
Speaker 1: I do. Let's go. Let's pick up and go to Europe.
Speaker 1: Let's pick up and go see the kids, Let's pick
Speaker 1: up whatever it is. Let's just go.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, you know that, like you have the means,
Speaker 2: you have the flexibility. It's just just doing it. You know.
Speaker 2: My dad, I think, I don't know, I don't need
Speaker 2: to jump around you, but my dad jump around my mom,
Speaker 2: My mom pasd the way in January. Yes, and you know,
Speaker 2: my dad is now at the point where he doesn't
Speaker 2: want to miss anything, birthdays, soccer games, I mean, you
Speaker 2: name it, you know. So he's like, you guys are
Speaker 2: going on vacation in Naples. I'm coming. I'm going fishing
Speaker 2: again in two weeks down in the Keys. He's coming,
Speaker 2: so you know it's not too late. But he's eighty
Speaker 2: four years old and now to be doing those things
Speaker 2: and saying yes and not making excuses and just doing
Speaker 2: I have really put It's put things into perspective for
Speaker 2: me the last month.
Speaker 1: Well, because if you wait till you're eighty four, you know,
Speaker 1: God bless your dad. I'm so glad he's doing that
Speaker 1: because he's going to get that time and your kids
Speaker 1: will now remember their grandfather very vividly and on their
Speaker 1: fishing trips and stuff. But he's not jumping out and
Speaker 1: playing pick a ball. He's not going out and playing golf.
Speaker 1: You know, he's not throwing them around the pool. He's
Speaker 1: sitting there taking it all in I'm sure at eighty four.
Speaker 1: But so that's the thing. It's like we have this
Speaker 1: window and look the backside of that window. We're still around,
Speaker 1: but we're not as active as you know, you can
Speaker 1: be with the kids. So it's like do it now
Speaker 1: and and now you you know, I hate to say this,
Speaker 1: but we will get to the point where we're kind
Speaker 1: of taking care of our parents and then our kids
Speaker 1: are going to be taking care of us. It's a
Speaker 1: circle of life, man.
Speaker 2: That that's it. So when you know your original question,
Speaker 2: do I friends that that every everyone I know at
Speaker 2: this stage of our lives has the same I'm going
Speaker 2: to call out excuses to not do things, and I
Speaker 2: find that it's in my court a lot, like I
Speaker 2: have to make it happen. I have to do it. Okay,
Speaker 2: you're not gonna come to me. I'm gonna come to you.
Speaker 2: And and you know, silver lining again with divorces that
Speaker 2: you get every other weekend off. So it is a
Speaker 2: good thing, more flexible than those you know, married couples,
Speaker 2: married friends that I have, and.
Speaker 1: So I just I just do And it does take
Speaker 1: someone to just do it. You got to just pull
Speaker 1: the ripcord and go do it. And you know, I
Speaker 1: have even with my kids when I'm talking about getting
Speaker 1: out and doing stuff like well I didn't get invited
Speaker 1: to this, what it's like, Well did you invite everybody?
Speaker 1: Like you know, you you can host the party, you
Speaker 1: can host this. You can so you can make that call,
Speaker 1: and you can make that trip and just show up.
Speaker 1: And by the way, they're always thankful when you do.
Speaker 1: It is an interesting perspective. And I do think divorce
Speaker 1: then both of us are divorced. You've been divorced four
Speaker 1: years now. I think it was like twenty twenty. I'm
Speaker 1: going on a lot longer than that. I'm like thirteen
Speaker 1: fourteen years and so, but it does. It gives you
Speaker 1: that perspective and oddly the time, as you said, divorce
Speaker 1: is equally tough and equally I don't want to say lovely,
Speaker 1: but empowering maybe of you have time to do things
Speaker 1: and you have kind of the perspective to actually want
Speaker 1: to go do those things completely.
Speaker 2: And you know, I laugh sometimes like when I was married,
Speaker 2: if we gave each other the space that we kind
Speaker 2: of have, that will when we're divorced. Yeah, there's something
Speaker 2: to say about that, like be really, you'll be your
Speaker 2: own person and do what you want to do and
Speaker 2: not have the stress of raising kids for the day,
Speaker 2: for the weekend. You know, you know they're in good hands,
Speaker 2: and so there is something to say about that.
Speaker 1: It's not you know what, and can we let's dive
Speaker 1: into this a little more, because let's just take the
Speaker 1: the onus off of this. It's a good thing. And
Speaker 1: I hate to say you're right, because I'm doing it
Speaker 1: the second time around with Lauren. Lauren and I are
Speaker 1: very defensive about giving each other space and time to
Speaker 1: go on. She's like, it's amazing. If I go on
Speaker 1: a golf trip, She's like, go, go grab JP, grab Wells,
Speaker 1: go go with your boys, y'all go and have a blast.
Speaker 1: And I'll get to Pebble Beach and there will be
Speaker 1: a bottle of whiskey or a bottle of wine and
Speaker 1: a note saying, have a great time with your guys.
Speaker 1: And conversely, Lauren has amazing girlfriends she's had since college.
Speaker 1: They go on these She just got back from her
Speaker 1: girls trip. They go for four or five days. This
Speaker 1: week she's going on her Experience Camp trip where she
Speaker 1: is a counselor for kids who have lost a parent
Speaker 1: or significant you know, are their sibling or whatever have you.
Speaker 1: And she's gone for an entire week. And like, giving
Speaker 1: us that time away makes us miss each other, but
Speaker 1: it lets you recharge your batteries and realize how much
Speaker 1: you do love each other and appreciate that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you know. I think it also depends on
Speaker 2: what stage of life you're in, right if very true newborn,
Speaker 2: you know, to a two year old and a newborn,
Speaker 2: like you're you're in the ship, you know, literally, it's
Speaker 2: a little bit yeah, yeah, you know, it's a different
Speaker 2: phase of life than I am today or you are
Speaker 2: you know so, But I do think I have that
Speaker 2: perspective of you know, how I would have it, not that,
Speaker 2: not that it would have worked out. I'm just saying like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: there's probably something to be said and an easier way
Speaker 2: to navigate and navigate and balance things. And when you
Speaker 2: do still maintain that level of I'm gonna call it freedom.
Speaker 1: But you know, well, the independence is important. Look, and
Speaker 1: I know people might be you listen, say hey, a hole,
Speaker 1: I can't just pick up and go to Europe. I
Speaker 1: get that, but like you, like JP just said, find
Speaker 1: your escape, and that might just be hey, babe, go
Speaker 1: to the golf range and hit balls for an hour tonight.
Speaker 1: You need to like or you tell your wife to like,
Speaker 1: you know what, why don't you go to the movies,
Speaker 1: or why don't you set up a day where you
Speaker 1: just go take care of yourself and get the manicure, pedicure,
Speaker 1: whatever it is, go for the walk or just disappear
Speaker 1: and just if you let each other just unplug and escape,
Speaker 1: even if it's for an hour or two. Because I
Speaker 1: know life is crazy, that's a big deal. Like just
Speaker 1: try and create that independence. So you got to unplug
Speaker 1: and get away from each other and from the kids
Speaker 1: and from all the craziness. Is we're about to head
Speaker 1: back into school. I mean, you're about to be in it, man.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, they go back Thursday.
Speaker 1: But that's a good thing. I know a lot of
Speaker 1: parents liked go back to school. Go back to school.
Speaker 1: I need I need the structure, I need the timing.
Speaker 1: I can't entertain you twenty four to seven. And that's
Speaker 1: the thing too, you know, And I don't want to
Speaker 1: be the old guys on the porch, but growing up,
Speaker 1: our parents did not entertain this twenty four to seven.
Speaker 1: But I'm sure when you have your kids, you're planning
Speaker 1: every second of every day.
Speaker 2: You almost feel guilty when you're not. Yeah, they had
Speaker 2: three weeks off in between camp and school, and you know,
Speaker 2: actually and I would split days, and there were two
Speaker 2: days where they were home. I had to work from home,
Speaker 2: trying to work, and I had nothing planned, and I
Speaker 2: felt like anxious about it, you know, like that. And
Speaker 2: I've had a few people say it's okay for them
Speaker 2: to do nothing. Yeah, it's okay for them to be
Speaker 2: bored and so, but yeah.
Speaker 1: They need this strength, it's okay for them to figure
Speaker 1: out how to entertain themselves. And it's actually it's really
Speaker 1: I honestly say that was an important thing of our
Speaker 1: imagination and our creativity of like, you know, and you
Speaker 1: make fun of it, but we used to just get
Speaker 1: the refrigerator box and build the fort and have a
Speaker 1: great You'd never see my brother and I. We would
Speaker 1: disappear for days, and it was the greatest thing in
Speaker 1: the world. And you know, play with our army men
Speaker 1: or what have you. And we've just spent hours and
Speaker 1: hours doing that and get lost in that, and they
Speaker 1: just I feel like the art of that is lost.
Speaker 1: And I see my friends that have young kids, and
Speaker 1: the kids are constantly coming in and say what am
Speaker 1: I going to do now? What am I going to
Speaker 1: do now? And they just jump on a screen and
Speaker 1: they get the screen time. And it's like, man, that
Speaker 1: is a constant battle. I'm I'm glad I didn't have
Speaker 1: to battle it as much because my kids weren't as
Speaker 1: screen savvy as this generation. But you're in it, like,
Speaker 1: have you dealt with and I don't know if your
Speaker 1: kids have phones and all that yet, but have you
Speaker 1: dealt with screen time, phones, social media, all that you have.
Speaker 1: You and Ashley had those discussions, so we're not.
Speaker 2: At the phone level yet giving them phones. The general
Speaker 2: consensus seems around like fifth and sixth.
Speaker 1: Grades, so middle school.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, right, But we are pretty much on the
Speaker 2: same page when it comes to how much screen time
Speaker 2: we allow them. Right during the week, the timing of
Speaker 2: it is different between what she does and what I do.
Speaker 2: But dr week, you know, homework's got to get done,
Speaker 2: like there's an hour max. Do what you want to
Speaker 2: play a video game, go on your iPad whatever hour
Speaker 2: max during the week, and then the weekends it slides
Speaker 2: a little bit, you know, because there's a little more downtime.
Speaker 2: But I think we're very cognizant of how much or
Speaker 2: how little they are watching at any given time, because
Speaker 2: you know, you see kids at dinner and they're on
Speaker 2: their phone and they're like they're NonStop and this this
Speaker 2: is like it's a drug. It's an absolute hundred percent.
Speaker 1: And the thing is we know this now, I mean,
Speaker 1: we know that Instagram, TikTok, all of it is so
Speaker 1: bad for our kids. It is horrible for them. It
Speaker 1: is an addiction and it's not helping them in any way,
Speaker 1: but it's become this thing that it eases our day.
Speaker 1: So here take take the phone. Have your kids even
Speaker 1: talked about social media yet?
Speaker 2: They've seen like reels, you know, on Instagram, but they
Speaker 2: they've spoke about likes every so often, but there's no
Speaker 2: I don't think there's a real understanding of what it
Speaker 2: is or what it's used for. And so we haven't
Speaker 2: really gotten into it that much.
Speaker 1: I don't envy that with with parents, he is that.
Speaker 1: I don't envy the battle and and just you have
Speaker 1: a son and a daughter and and so do I
Speaker 1: and just knowing body image and especially for our young
Speaker 1: girls and young women growing up. Man, it just broke
Speaker 1: my heart because it's also this light into the world
Speaker 1: that you're not invited to this. You're not cool, you're
Speaker 1: not pretty, you're not that. It's all it's it's so negative,
Speaker 1: but none of it is positive.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm really I mean, I'm afraid of Look, they're
Speaker 2: both very strong kids, but like anybody can be, is
Speaker 2: influenced by it. And I'm really nervous just about self
Speaker 2: esteem and you know, trying to make sure that they
Speaker 2: understand that what they see there's it's not real. I
Speaker 2: mean it's real, but it's not real, like, yeah, trying
Speaker 2: to be able to explain that to them at a
Speaker 2: young age.
Speaker 1: You're just seeing the best of the best of everybody
Speaker 1: all the time, right. Co parenting I found very interesting
Speaker 1: post divorce because no matter and you and Ashley, I
Speaker 1: know have a good working relationship we'll call it where
Speaker 1: you both co parent, but at the same time you're
Speaker 1: still separate. You know, it's very interesting when you're not
Speaker 1: getting the twenty four to seven news feed of what's
Speaker 1: going on all the time. I know the kids had
Speaker 1: a good week, I know they had a bad week.
Speaker 1: I know they really did this or you know, all
Speaker 1: you can really get is the perspective from your ex
Speaker 1: when you kind of get the download when the kids
Speaker 1: come back. I found that very difficult because there was
Speaker 1: always kind of that re entry as you start a
Speaker 1: new week of having the kids.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, we just do things differently, you know,
Speaker 2: And and the things that triggered each of us during
Speaker 2: the marriage still trigger us after the marriage. That doesn't change. No,
Speaker 2: now you're not married, maybe you give a little less of.
Speaker 1: A yeah, no, yeah, I think yeah, it exacerbates even
Speaker 1: more because I think it's worse because now you really
Speaker 1: don't give it out right.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do what I want to do anyway. I think, look,
Speaker 2: I know how she operates, and I know how she
Speaker 2: deals with the kids in certain situations, and she knows
Speaker 2: how I do it, and so there is less consistency
Speaker 2: because of that. I think the general message to them
Speaker 2: is the same and I think they get that, but
Speaker 2: it's how it's delivered and how we manage it that
Speaker 2: it's we do it differently.
Speaker 1: That's all well, because you always did it differently, but
Speaker 1: it was differently yet unified because it all came out
Speaker 1: of this big picture of parent and now when you're separate.
Speaker 1: And by the way, the kids are savvy, man, they
Speaker 1: know they're they they're playing the game and pushing the
Speaker 1: buttons with her, push the buttons with you, and it's
Speaker 1: it is a constant negotiation. I found it very fascinating
Speaker 1: and it was very difficult for me. I don't know
Speaker 1: if it was for you those first several I guess
Speaker 1: months when the kids left and all of a sudden
Speaker 1: there was no noise. There was you know, you wake
Speaker 1: up and you're like, okay, I got nothing to do. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'd go do anything, and there's wonderful freedom in that,
Speaker 1: but it's also kind of a weird, lonely feeling at first.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, we had a very drawn out called
Speaker 2: divorce separation, right because we decided right before COVID hit,
Speaker 2: and then literally a week or two weeks before COVID hit,
Speaker 2: then it hit. The kids came home from school, how
Speaker 2: are we going to sell the house? I'm not going
Speaker 2: to stay in our room. Like, it was a very
Speaker 2: strange year till you know.
Speaker 1: She event Yeah, what a weird time to do it.
Speaker 2: It was bizarre. And then she ended up moving out
Speaker 2: and we sold the house and I moved out, and like,
Speaker 2: the kids see all this in different phases, and so
Speaker 2: it wasn't like a quick hey I'm moving out. You know,
Speaker 2: we're getting divorced. That never happened. So every phase of
Speaker 2: the divorce was kind of like gradual, and so it
Speaker 2: all became a matter of fact to them. I don't
Speaker 2: even remember the first day that she slept in her
Speaker 2: new place with the kids. Like, it's all such a
Speaker 2: blur to me because it was just drawn out over
Speaker 2: so long.
Speaker 1: I you know, it's funny and I don't blame you
Speaker 1: and Ashley at all for this. But and I don't
Speaker 1: know if you remember, but so your season of The Bachelorette,
Speaker 1: when we were in Fiji where we shot your finale
Speaker 1: and Ashley's season, was like the penultimate meltdown of my divorce.
Speaker 1: That was when everything was happening. I don't think I
Speaker 1: knew that, and I was, I mean, I was so detached.
Speaker 1: I felt ad because I mean I was kind of
Speaker 1: I was literally having these phone calls. We were in Asia,
Speaker 1: and I remember, I don't know if you remember this
Speaker 1: rose ceremony were in some of these old ruins, and
Speaker 1: I forget where we were in Asia. Maybe we're in
Speaker 1: Thailand or something. And I kind of had to stand
Speaker 1: over in this like column to hide from the camera,
Speaker 1: and I was by myself, and I'm literally on my
Speaker 1: phone texting my ex back in LA and we're having
Speaker 1: this really big blow up and I have to walk
Speaker 1: out and deliver the line for the rose ceremony. I
Speaker 1: have to sit down with Ashley and talk about love
Speaker 1: and who she's in love with and all this, and
Speaker 1: then I would go right back to like my life
Speaker 1: melting down behind the scenes, and nobody knew. I didn't
Speaker 1: tell anybody it was a why it was Ashley season
Speaker 1: and then Emily Maynard season were really the two big
Speaker 1: seasons that stood out to me of like total disaster.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I had no idea. I can't imagine having
Speaker 2: to go through trying to two people falling in love
Speaker 2: and that's.
Speaker 1: And having this, you know, and just going and that
Speaker 1: was the thing. It was like this. I almost thought
Speaker 1: I was in a sitcom because I was, you know,
Speaker 1: having this really heated text and you know, at times
Speaker 1: weren't nice and things were getting very heated. And then
Speaker 1: literally walk in and be like, okay, ash so you're
Speaker 1: taking JP to the fantasy suite. Do you think you
Speaker 1: know he's the one? And this love and you know,
Speaker 1: love is a very special thing and I want you
Speaker 1: to get married. And all I'm thinking is, don't do it, man,
Speaker 1: You're only.
Speaker 2: Getting so so my situation is technically your fault.
Speaker 1: Yes, exactly. No, I should have saved you, guys, it
Speaker 1: was a hunt. I should have just stood up and said,
Speaker 1: this whole thing's a farce. I don't believe in love, nough.
Speaker 1: I I oddly do still believe in love very much,
Speaker 1: obviously as I got remarried again, And so how's the
Speaker 1: dating world for you? Getting back into it was a
Speaker 1: very strange thing for me. What was it like for
Speaker 1: you to start going on those first few dates.
Speaker 2: I had a very difficult time with divorce, just mentally,
Speaker 2: Like it took me a year and a half, maybe
Speaker 2: even two years to really feel like I was able
Speaker 2: to connect with somebody. It's you know, it's it's it's
Speaker 2: like a death.
Speaker 1: One hundred percent. I tell people that it is very
Speaker 1: much a morning process. You go through all the phases
Speaker 1: of that for sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And and mine was very long, not because I
Speaker 2: wanted to be back with her, but just it was like,
Speaker 2: how can this be happening to me? And are the
Speaker 2: kids going to be okay? And like that whole I
Speaker 2: was kind of a wreck for a year and a half.
Speaker 2: And so I would go out on gates and this
Speaker 2: is tarble to say, but I was really just going
Speaker 2: through the motion. I really was just trying to get
Speaker 2: comfortable with being around and trying to see can I
Speaker 2: connect with somebody else again? And so the first year
Speaker 2: and a half two years it was it was bad.
Speaker 2: I mean, I went out, but like it wasn't.
Speaker 1: There by the way, I'm right there with you. I
Speaker 1: totally resemble that and did the exact same thing because
Speaker 1: I felt so guilty about the kids and they They
Speaker 1: will also say that it takes so say you were
Speaker 1: married for eight years, it will essentially take four years.
Speaker 1: It takes half the time you were with that person
Speaker 1: or in that relationship to truly be over it. And
Speaker 1: I don't mean like you know over you're over it.
Speaker 1: I mean you could be ready to move on, but
Speaker 1: like truly have your life in place and the kids
Speaker 1: and feel mentally, emotionally healthy to move past it. And
Speaker 1: that's a crazy thing to think, you know, two three,
Speaker 1: four years that's about right, that's what it takes to
Speaker 1: truly deal with that loss and move on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I've you know, I finally got there. I
Speaker 2: mean I'm not you know, I still probably have work
Speaker 2: to do, but but I we all do.
Speaker 1: Man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's I mean, that's a lifetime.
Speaker 1: So there was because I I look, there's there's a
Speaker 1: reason there's the old saying about you know, never you know,
Speaker 1: marry the first person you meet after a divorce, So
Speaker 1: you know, don't ever be that first person after a breakup,
Speaker 1: because it's not going to go well. That is very true.
Speaker 1: Now that I've been there myself, I'm like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's very true. The poor girl that dated me the
Speaker 1: first time I got divorced, I'm like, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1: I actually knew her and remain friends, and I apologize
Speaker 1: to her later. I was like, hey, sorry, my bad.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny that. Like, I've got a couple of
Speaker 2: people that wanted to set me up and my friend.
Speaker 2: They're like and they lead with she just got divorced.
Speaker 2: I'm like nope, Like well she's getting divorced. I'm like, nope, yeah,
Speaker 2: that's the worst. She's in the process up for getting divorced.
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, I want to unwind that. No, I'm like,
Speaker 2: you got to be at least a year out.
Speaker 1: That means they're going to go back and forth a
Speaker 1: couple of times. There's gonna be I'm not.
Speaker 2: Gonna be a crutch. And admittedly, like I did that right,
Speaker 2: I used women as crutches like to kind of get through.
Speaker 1: And unbeknowkst to you, you do it and you look
Speaker 1: back at it, you don't realize you're doing it. In
Speaker 1: the moment, there's no malice to it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, and some of them may have even been
Speaker 2: the little I'm gonna say forced is the wrong word,
Speaker 2: because I knew it was good for me, and it
Speaker 2: wasn't like I didn't enjoy spending time with them. I did,
Speaker 2: but I just knew that it wasn't getting anywhere. And
Speaker 2: I still maybe stayed in a little longer than I
Speaker 2: should have. And granted, I have a lot of perspective now, but.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I well, it's funny. There's things that, like
Speaker 1: I got divorced in somebodies of mine where they were
Speaker 1: trying to do the right thing. And I'm interested to
Speaker 1: know if you had friends that did this, like let's
Speaker 1: go to Vegas. You know, we're going to burn a
Speaker 1: hole through the world a mile wide and that. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't love Vegas. I don't go there
Speaker 1: very often. I'm not a big Vegas guy. I don't
Speaker 1: love clubs and stuff. And so I said, yeah, I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: I get I'm like, this is what I'm supposed to
Speaker 1: do now, right, I've been divorced after being married for
Speaker 1: twenty years. I have a little money, I have a
Speaker 1: little fame. I guess I need to like burn a
Speaker 1: hole through the world. That's my that's my thing now,
Speaker 1: and I was just it was almost depressing to think about.
Speaker 1: Then a buddy called me said, Hey, man, me and
Speaker 1: some guys are going fishing up in Oregon, just a bunch,
Speaker 1: just a guy's trip, whiskey cigars. I'm like, that's my escape.
Speaker 1: That's what i want to do. Cancel the Vegas trip,
Speaker 1: wet fishing. And but there's things you do, is the
Speaker 1: point to all this. There's things you do because you're
Speaker 1: going through the motions and you're like, well, I saw
Speaker 1: this in a movie once. I guess I'm supposed to
Speaker 1: do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm the exact same, like I I wasn't living
Speaker 2: vicariously through me. When they say that, it kind of
Speaker 2: gives like, what what are you going to live vicarious?
Speaker 2: Like there's I'm not that exciting, right and and I'm
Speaker 2: not going to Vegas and I'm not doing those sorts
Speaker 2: of things. I'm still me, you know, granted, kind of
Speaker 2: how we started the conversation, I am saying a yes,
Speaker 2: saying yes to a lot more, right So even if
Speaker 2: it's hey, come out to LA for the weekend and
Speaker 2: see some friends, or I'm definitely saying yes to a
Speaker 2: lot more. But I'm still me. I'm still doing the
Speaker 2: things that I like to do. I have kids now,
Speaker 2: so I still have to be somewhat responsible.
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly, you.
Speaker 2: Know, but but I was I was never. I was
Speaker 2: never that that kind of guy that I would just
Speaker 2: let loose to that extent. So you know, I'm not
Speaker 2: going to change now.
Speaker 1: Nor nor should we at this stage in our lives.
Speaker 1: So you're four years, you know, into this. Where are
Speaker 1: you in this journey to kind of rediscover yourself?
Speaker 2: You can't say that word, what journey?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you're a good point. You're right. Where are
Speaker 1: you in this process is what it is. No, but
Speaker 1: where are you in, like dating now, looking for love?
Speaker 1: Are you open to that, ready for it at this
Speaker 1: point in your life, because it seems like you're in
Speaker 1: a really healthy place.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I I am, and I know exactly the dynamic
Speaker 2: that I am looking for. I mean, I can't write it.
Speaker 1: Out because I got a great girl for you. I'm
Speaker 1: just kidding you.
Speaker 2: Want you have you burned up all three?
Speaker 1: Yes, that's true. I use that trump card.
Speaker 2: I know what works, yeah right, and I know what
Speaker 2: doesn't work, and I know the red flags and I
Speaker 2: know who to kind of to put my time into
Speaker 2: and who not to waste time. And not that I'm
Speaker 2: not giving people opportunities. I am, but I just I
Speaker 2: just now have enough experience with relationships and love and
Speaker 2: family and growth, you know that, that I really know
Speaker 2: what's important to me. And so it's been challenging. Like
Speaker 2: I don't I'm not from Miami. So first of all,
Speaker 2: meeting people down here organically for me is difficult because
Speaker 2: the friends that I do have, you know, they're married kids.
Speaker 1: That's a really tough part to this when you know
Speaker 1: no one tells you about that post divorce. It's you
Speaker 1: don't have that social circle where hey, let's go out
Speaker 1: and grab a beer, maybe we'll meet somebody.
Speaker 2: It is I can count on one hand in the
Speaker 2: last maybe three years that I've done exactly that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: just because it's just they're no, I don't have that
Speaker 2: kind of network here in the stage of the life
Speaker 2: that I'm in. So I do rely on apps a
Speaker 2: lot just to at least meet people, and I hate them.
Speaker 2: It's a needle in the haystack. And you know, Miami's
Speaker 2: a little Miami, you know what I mean, You know
Speaker 2: what I mean. So it's challenging to meet people. But
Speaker 2: I've met some nice women I've dated for two to
Speaker 2: three months. You know, generally they end because it fizzles
Speaker 2: and it's just not there, and I'm looking for that
Speaker 2: connection again.
Speaker 1: Have you have you noticed with the show, because I
Speaker 1: even found this as the host and being around the show,
Speaker 1: that when I started dating, I had to really check
Speaker 1: myself from being a producer of thinking along the lines
Speaker 1: and the stages of this, and I would get ahead
Speaker 1: of myself and I could kind of see where this
Speaker 1: was going way too fast, and I'm like, I'm not
Speaker 1: giving this a fair shake, or maybe I am, and
Speaker 1: I just and see this faster than everybody.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: I don't know, it was really weird.
Speaker 2: I don't know have to show it anything to do
Speaker 2: with it. I meant, I definitely look within, Like the
Speaker 2: first fifteen minutes, I'm in my head and like I
Speaker 2: don't want to spend any more time with her, you know,
Speaker 2: And then I try to keep it going, so I
Speaker 2: try not to get in my own way, which I
Speaker 2: think I do a lot. But ninety nine percent of
Speaker 2: the time, like those where I had the initial gut
Speaker 2: feeling it's not going to work. Two months later, like
Speaker 2: I knew it. It's not going to work.
Speaker 1: And there will be that time when you when you
Speaker 1: don't have that and you're like, it hits you upside
Speaker 1: the head and you're like, oh my god, Okay, it
Speaker 1: does exist. It's out there. It's frustrating to find it.
Speaker 1: But when you do, it's so fantastic, and you're like,
Speaker 1: you're reminded how good it can be and how effortless
Speaker 1: and fun and easy and all those exciting words.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I would say maybe maybe there's been one
Speaker 2: with potential where I felt kind of excited again. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you know, but for the most part, it's it's uh,
Speaker 2: it's tough. It's it's tough out there.
Speaker 1: Is it hard to watch it? You know, Ashley has
Speaker 1: obviously moved on, and she's been very public about it,
Speaker 1: social media wise and all that. And that's one thing
Speaker 1: I will say about breakups. It's you know, I had
Speaker 1: to talk with a friend of mine who lost his
Speaker 1: wife who I was very good friends with, and he says,
Speaker 1: you know, the thing is, my wife's gone. You know,
Speaker 1: I can't get her back. I'm sad. I love her,
Speaker 1: but she's gone in divorce. She's not gone. She's on
Speaker 1: Facebook she's on Instagram, You're going to see her all
Speaker 1: the time. And you know, when when two famous people
Speaker 1: and you know, I'm going to use that term loosely,
Speaker 1: we're all kind of have a moderkham of fame. But still,
Speaker 1: you guys are known, and you know, Ashley has been
Speaker 1: very public about that. Has that been hard her to
Speaker 1: kind of deal with her or honestly, does it give
Speaker 1: you a little bit of okay, good, she's kind of
Speaker 1: doing her thing. I can go do mine.
Speaker 2: It's been three years, they've been dating for three years.
Speaker 2: Early on it was it was tough, especially when I
Speaker 2: knew he was spending time with the kids.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: I've had a major internal struggle with that. So I
Speaker 2: would say then it got easier. It just got easier.
Speaker 2: Early on, I actually muted her Instagram, so I would
Speaker 2: like I'd have to manually go to look if I
Speaker 2: was to do it, and sometimes when she has the kids,
Speaker 2: I would have I would have done that. But for
Speaker 2: the most part, I try to stay off it.
Speaker 1: Because it does no good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my god, it went down a spiral of death.
Speaker 2: I mean, it was terrible in the beginning. So now
Speaker 2: it doesn't bug me as much. I mean, you know,
Speaker 2: he's a bit obviously a very big part of her life.
Speaker 2: He and his family spend time with the kids, and
Speaker 2: you know, it's somewhat nice for him that the kids
Speaker 2: to have that kind of a family down here. You know,
Speaker 2: her family's in Maine. Yeah, my dad and my brother
Speaker 2: they're all in New York. So if we see each
Speaker 2: other three or four times a year, it's a lot.
Speaker 1: I wish I would move back up north.
Speaker 2: If the kids weren't around, I'd probably be back up north.
Speaker 1: I went through the same thing post divorce. My ex
Speaker 1: moved on and got remarried quicker than I did. She
Speaker 1: was married first, and at first, you know, it is
Speaker 1: it's very awkward because of the kids, right another man
Speaker 1: in the kids' lives, and there's that kind of territorial
Speaker 1: thing that I think guys have. I don't know if
Speaker 1: women have the same thing. I know she did to
Speaker 1: a certain degree. Luckily she met Lauren and we were
Speaker 1: both very respectful of introducing and I respected her enough,
Speaker 1: and I'm sure you did too. Like you knew Ashley,
Speaker 1: and I knew, you know, my ex was going to
Speaker 1: pick somebody that was also a good mom or a
Speaker 1: good dad. You know, that would be a good role model,
Speaker 1: but it's still just not you. And so it was
Speaker 1: hard at first, and then you realize it's just a
Speaker 1: bonus person in their life, and he is. He's been
Speaker 1: nothing but wonderful and loving to my kids. And Lauren
Speaker 1: of course, has been such a positive force in my kids'
Speaker 1: lives and now I can't even imagine her not being
Speaker 1: around the kids. And so time does heal those wounds?
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm so I don't. I wouldn't say that
Speaker 2: still is as enthusiastic about it as as it's been.
Speaker 1: It's been over a decade for me.
Speaker 2: Man, Yeah, I've got some catching but I will say
Speaker 2: that that is the only trigger recent trigger the last
Speaker 2: year for me is me seeing him with the kids
Speaker 2: and you know, whether it's playing basketball or throwing him
Speaker 2: in the pool or whatever it is where it's like
Speaker 2: I should be doing.
Speaker 1: That, Yeah that was me, that was my It was me, that.
Speaker 2: Should be me. Nobody else should be doing that other
Speaker 2: than me. Yeah, so I still struggle with that, Like
Speaker 2: it's it's still uncomfortable for me. You know, I don't
Speaker 2: spend half my kid's childhood with them, and like, now
Speaker 2: somebody else is and playing that yes he'll never be
Speaker 2: their father, I get all, yeah, but still a father
Speaker 2: like role and doing things you know that I really
Speaker 2: should be there doing it's it's that is the longest
Speaker 2: lasting challenge.
Speaker 1: Have you had those moments? You know, big moments in life,
Speaker 1: whether they're big birthdays, graduations, you know, those things are
Speaker 1: very interesting because you start to have to share them
Speaker 1: with that person. They're they're there. You know, typically if
Speaker 1: you have a decent enough relationship, some people, you know,
Speaker 1: the good news is, you know, some people have a relationship,
Speaker 1: they can't even be in the same state or in
Speaker 1: the same room period. So if things are good enough,
Speaker 1: you can at least share those moments. And you know,
Speaker 1: my ex and I have, and I'm sure you and
Speaker 1: Ashley will. So you'll be at the soccer game, or
Speaker 1: you'll be at the graduation and you're all there together
Speaker 1: and everybody puts on the smiley face.
Speaker 2: Yeah you fake it, I guess. I mean, look, he
Speaker 2: I actually didn't meet him for a very very long time,
Speaker 2: and there were moments where she would text me and
Speaker 2: say He's gonna come to the basketball game, and I
Speaker 2: would lose my ship, you know, like I'm coaching, like
Speaker 2: I don't want to see him on the sideline, like no, no,
Speaker 2: and like you want me to make a scene, I'll
Speaker 2: totally make a scene. I don't care. So and granted
Speaker 2: it's it's ridiculous, right, and I was being probably being
Speaker 2: a baby about it, but like I just wasn't ready,
Speaker 2: Like I didn't want that to be the first time
Speaker 2: I met him either.
Speaker 1: So look, you wish you had the wherewithal to say, Ashlock,
Speaker 1: I'm mentally and emotionally just not ready for this. Can
Speaker 1: you respect that? You know you wish you had said that,
Speaker 1: But what you'd said was.
Speaker 2: I don't really care. You know, I may have used
Speaker 2: that card three thousand times prior to that, and to
Speaker 2: the point where she was probably saying to me, Look,
Speaker 2: it's been long enough. I think he should probably meet himself.
Speaker 2: But I think this basketball season he might might come
Speaker 2: to the game.
Speaker 1: So have y'all finally met?
Speaker 2: Yeah, we finally met. Okay, we finally met. That's good. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they moved in together.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's look, it's it's never it's never not different.
Speaker 1: I won't say it's never not awkward, because the awkwardness
Speaker 1: does go away, but it's never not different. That's just
Speaker 1: the new normal, and that's what we chose, right, And
Speaker 1: so I always felt like you aren't allowed to put
Speaker 1: that on the kids. They didn't sign up for this.
Speaker 1: You did, You and Ashley did. So it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, everyone's just gonna have to make nice
Speaker 1: and realize it's zero point five percent of our time
Speaker 1: this year that we're all going to have to worry
Speaker 1: about this, you know. The other ninety nine point five
Speaker 1: we can go have our own world and do our
Speaker 1: own thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, And I think if there's one thing that
Speaker 2: one of the things that she and I are on
Speaker 2: the same page is like the kids never see any
Speaker 2: of well, like we're talking about, they don't. They wouldn't
Speaker 2: know about any of this, right, They would know them uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: They wouldn't know my conversation. They wouldn't know. So look
Speaker 2: if if if Ford says to me, hey, Dad, you
Speaker 2: know he's going to be at the basketball game, I'd
Speaker 2: be like great, you know, like I wouldn't be like, no's.
Speaker 1: Over my dead body, right, So they.
Speaker 2: Would they don't know any different. And I think we
Speaker 2: do a very good job of putting on a little
Speaker 2: bit of a front so that they are comfortable and
Speaker 2: they see that it is a kind of one big,
Speaker 2: happy family. But I will say there's I don't understand
Speaker 2: those couples that go on vacations with their ex and
Speaker 2: their family. That's never happening. I don't care.
Speaker 1: So I, by the way, I so agree with that.
Speaker 1: I like I have I don't even have respect for it.
Speaker 1: I don't know, you know. I was like, I just
Speaker 1: don't even know how you get there, because obviously we
Speaker 1: got divorced for a reason. However amicable we are now,
Speaker 1: we're divorced for a reason. It's because we don't want
Speaker 1: to travel and be together and live together. So yeah,
Speaker 1: those those couples that are like, oh, yeah, we you know,
Speaker 1: I'm best friends with the wife and we No, no, no.
Speaker 2: No, you're really not. You're keeping her close because you
Speaker 2: don't trust.
Speaker 1: Right, keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer, exactly.
Speaker 1: It is so true. Beyond love and all that stuff,
Speaker 1: life is good. Work is still the same.
Speaker 2: And yeah, life is good. Uh, work is great. Busy.
Speaker 2: I have flexibility when it comes to the kids, so
Speaker 2: I don't miss anything. Yeah, you know, it's just it's
Speaker 2: just the balance of trying to get them to see
Speaker 2: their family as much as possible and doing the right
Speaker 2: thing and being the right parent. And but life's good.
Speaker 1: And they'll get to an age too, I think, you know,
Speaker 1: I you it's it's oddly reminiscent of me. We were
Speaker 1: kind of similar as far as the ages we're going
Speaker 1: through divorce and stuff. You were in your mid right
Speaker 1: around mid forties. I was kind of younger, a little
Speaker 1: younger than that when I started, but the kids were
Speaker 1: about the same age. And I found the older the
Speaker 1: kids got, obviously the easier the divorce and all that
Speaker 1: stuff becomes. You know, time goes by, but also the
Speaker 1: kids get older, more self sufficient. You know, they get
Speaker 1: into middle school and they're gone. You know, they just
Speaker 1: they need parents around a lot less and that helps,
Speaker 1: you know, that starts the separation and creates more space
Speaker 1: for both of you, and it definitely helped.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And there's just tons of activities and this basketball
Speaker 2: practice and things, and so you know, they're not with us.
Speaker 2: I think I think what will become a little bit
Speaker 2: challenging is right now we're fifty to fifty and we
Speaker 2: do two two three, so they're constantly kind of going
Speaker 2: back and forth every two days, and I think as
Speaker 2: they get a little bit older, and maybe we'll go
Speaker 2: to the to the week week or something.
Speaker 1: We did the week on a week off, and we
Speaker 1: tried it both ways for a while, and we did
Speaker 1: the ten you know week, and then we went two, two, three,
Speaker 1: and then we went back as it was like it
Speaker 1: was just it helped us. Again, do everybody do their
Speaker 1: own thing, but it just helped me, Like I want
Speaker 1: to get into a system and where I'm you know,
Speaker 1: really digging into the kids for a week and I'm
Speaker 1: making their meals and we're planning and we're going through
Speaker 1: the weekend, et cetera. It's just the constant back and forth. Really,
Speaker 1: there's shin guards everywhere and dance ballet shoes and it's
Speaker 1: like we were going back and forth to each other's houses.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, we got to stop this.
Speaker 2: Totally. We're not. I don't think we're there yet. I
Speaker 2: mean I could get there, but I don't think Ashley
Speaker 2: wants to be without them for a week yet.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that is it's tough. It's a long time.
Speaker 2: She doesn't want to be with them for a week either.
Speaker 1: That's no, It's so true. After a week. You're like,
Speaker 1: I am done. That's so funny. You're like, I'm on
Speaker 1: the next plane out of here. But it is. It
Speaker 1: is interesting when you know that week off, when there
Speaker 1: is you know, there's stuff going on, and you know,
Speaker 1: you you you kind of check back in and see them.
Speaker 1: And we kind of had the rule of if you're
Speaker 1: lonely and you're just missing them, you're more than welcome
Speaker 1: to take them to dinner. You know, hey, you pick
Speaker 1: them up from soccer tonight, take them to dinner, and
Speaker 1: then drop them back off at the house. It was,
Speaker 1: you know, we try to be good about that because
Speaker 1: a week is, especially at first when they're young, that's
Speaker 1: a long time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and she would We would be also. I mean,
Speaker 2: even if we went a week, we're so flexible. I
Speaker 2: can't can you watch, I can't pick them up. We're
Speaker 2: we're pretty flexible, which makes it easier.
Speaker 1: This is the this is by the way, this is
Speaker 1: the show I probably should be doing at this point. Uh.
Speaker 1: You know, I love love, and I love helping people
Speaker 1: find love. But what I think I'm probably really good
Speaker 1: at now is is helping people through divorce. Is that
Speaker 1: the new show?
Speaker 2: I think there's definitely, definitely enough action and drama and yes, yes.
Speaker 1: I'm creating a show. You will survive and more exactly
Speaker 1: and more shall pass, This too shall pass.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I feel like it needs to end though with
Speaker 2: them finding love again. I don't like there's got to
Speaker 2: be hope. So people have to hold on to some
Speaker 2: level of hope. And you're right, we do.
Speaker 1: We got to work on what the button is. We
Speaker 1: got to figure out what that button is other than
Speaker 1: just not killing each other. That's a good thing, right, dude.
Speaker 1: It's so good to talk to you and to catch up.
Speaker 1: And we are both, as we said, at the phase
Speaker 1: and at the age of our lives when we say
Speaker 1: yes and we're actually going to make things happen. This
Speaker 1: is going to happen. I'm I'm coming to Florida more
Speaker 1: often now. I'm just going to take it upon myself
Speaker 1: to drive over and see you.
Speaker 2: I'm going to text you the weekends I am off
Speaker 2: in October and November because September is not going to work.
Speaker 2: October November and you're going to pick one and I'm
Speaker 2: going to find a suffish and chip and we're going
Speaker 2: to go and it's happening. That's it.
Speaker 1: This is happening finally, and then and by the way,
Speaker 1: we'll put it up and everyone can see the aftermath
Speaker 1: on social media would be two really boring guys showing fish.
Speaker 1: That's what every woman wants to see on social media exactly.
Speaker 1: By the way, you know, I should probably dive in
Speaker 1: and take a look at your dating profiles. Please tell
Speaker 1: me there's not one picture of you and a fish.
Speaker 2: No. I was warned early on.
Speaker 1: Okay, good, good, good, I take I do some of.
Speaker 2: My best work with fish. I'm just saying.
Speaker 1: It makes everything look bigger, exactly.
Speaker 2: But no, that is that That is number one rules.
Speaker 2: You don't do that, so I learned early on.
Speaker 1: You know, it's it's very interesting because you know, you
Speaker 1: do have that moderkrum of fame, and so I'm sure
Speaker 1: it is difficult. You know, you kind of have to
Speaker 1: dabble on these apps. It's like, well, people enter into
Speaker 1: knowing already a little bit about you. You come into
Speaker 1: this knowing nothing. And I found that very interesting when
Speaker 1: I was dating. It's like, okay, you at least they
Speaker 1: think they know, right, they don't know you, but they
Speaker 1: think they know a large portion of your life because
Speaker 1: they saw it on TV or they see me on TV,
Speaker 1: and then you know nothing about this person, and so
Speaker 1: it makes that dynamic of truly getting to know someone
Speaker 1: on a date more difficult.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I haven't found that too much, just because my
Speaker 2: you know, our season was so far removed. You're you,
Speaker 2: and obviously we're getting part of the soil for a
Speaker 2: very long time, but we're so far removed that sometime
Speaker 2: someone will make the connection like you look so familiar,
Speaker 2: how do I know you? And I certainly don't lob
Speaker 2: it out there, and then other times they say, hey,
Speaker 2: were you on the batch? I'm like yeah, And so
Speaker 2: we kind of have gotten past it pretty quickly and
Speaker 2: all the circumstances that I've been in where it has
Speaker 2: popped up, so it hasn't been that challenging to navigate.
Speaker 1: Well, I wish you the best on this, on this
Speaker 1: journey that was intentional. And by the way, we are
Speaker 1: going to be together very soon. You and I will
Speaker 1: be together at a very special wedding in Los Angeles together,
Speaker 1: So I look forward to seeing you there and that
Speaker 1: that is going to be an amazing wedding. And by
Speaker 1: the way, I think Ashley is going to be there
Speaker 1: as well. Does she not.
Speaker 2: No, I don't think she was invited.
Speaker 1: I think she I think you may want, you may
Speaker 1: may want.
Speaker 2: I think she would tell me if she was going.
Speaker 1: Okay, wait, no, she can't.
Speaker 2: She's got the kids.
Speaker 1: Got the kids. That's good, that's why. Well, I know
Speaker 1: you're going to be there and I'm looking forward to
Speaker 1: it and Lauren and I can't wait to see and
Speaker 1: give you a big hug and catch up. But we
Speaker 1: need to do it on your home turf soon. But
Speaker 1: I appreciate the time. Always love talking to you, my friend,
Speaker 1: and we got to do it more.
Speaker 2: Sounds good. Thanks hie Bud, all right, love.
Speaker 1: You, Thanks for listening. Follow us on Instagram at the
Speaker 1: most dramatic pod ever, and make sure to write us
Speaker 1: a review and leave us five stars. I'll talk to
Speaker 1: you next time.