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Speaker 1: Yes, Yes, I am Dramas and this is the Street

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Speaker 1: Stoic podcast, bringing you your daily dose of timeless stoke

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Speaker 1: philosophy remixed for the hip hop generation. Now, with that

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Speaker 1: in mind, let's get things started with your daily shot

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Speaker 1: of inspiration. Now today we are going to be talking

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Speaker 1: about the idea and the feeling and the concept of

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Speaker 1: confidence and how it starts and ends with you. And

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Speaker 1: when I was thinking about this episode, this whole idea

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Speaker 1: around confidence, one of the first people that popped in

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Speaker 1: my head was Diddy, right Like, he is somebody who

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Speaker 1: is unapologetically confidence it and some people hate him for it,

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Speaker 1: some people love him for it, but you can't deny

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Speaker 1: that a lot of his success is based around the

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Speaker 1: idea that he is unafraid to declare what he wants

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Speaker 1: and actually, bigger than that, believes that he deserves everything

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Speaker 1: that he wants right and that has led him to

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Speaker 1: the life that he's living right now. And the thing

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Speaker 1: that always comes to my mind when I think of

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Speaker 1: Diddy and just this idea of his, like endless confidence,

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Speaker 1: it's a it's a video, like an old video of

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Speaker 1: him in his office where he's getting off the phone

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Speaker 1: and he's closing some deal and then he's just like

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Speaker 1: slamming the phone down in like sort of this happy

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Speaker 1: rage moment, and he's just yelling, I'm a savage. Whatever

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Speaker 1: I want, I'm going to get. What's next, I gotta

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Speaker 1: get it. It's a ridiculous video and it's it's like

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Speaker 1: a funny meme kind of video, but it's also showing

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Speaker 1: you why he is who he is, right, Like, he

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Speaker 1: is building that confidence in himself. He is declaring whatever

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Speaker 1: he wants he is going to get, and he's programming

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Speaker 1: his mind to never doubt itself, right, to never look

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Speaker 1: at a door that closed as the end of the road, right,

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Speaker 1: like always reminding himself he can do whatever the hell

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Speaker 1: he feels like him and that is a secret to

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Speaker 1: his success. It's this confidence that he is instilled. It

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Speaker 1: comes from, you know, inside of him. He's declaring it

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Speaker 1: to himself. He himself is saying I am able to

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Speaker 1: do whatever I want. I can get whatever I want. Right.

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Speaker 1: There's so much power in that. And again it speaks

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Speaker 1: to the idea that confidence starts and ends with you, right,

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Speaker 1: and that leads to a stoic quote from Seneca and

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Speaker 1: he says, our lack of confidence is not the result

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Speaker 1: of difficulty. The difficulty comes from our lack of confidence.

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Speaker 1: And he's speaking to the idea that we are our

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Speaker 1: worst enemies, right, and that you know, any confidence that

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Speaker 1: we lack is not from some failure, but instead from

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Speaker 1: our own belief that we are not good enough to win.

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Speaker 1: And actually the difficulties of life he's talking about, right,

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Speaker 1: when we feel like we don't know what to do

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Speaker 1: and we've hit this roadblock and you know, things are

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Speaker 1: looking down, all of that comes from the fact that

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Speaker 1: we are lacking confidence. Right. It's not the other way

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Speaker 1: around like many people think, like, oh, I had this failure,

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Speaker 1: it reminded me that I'm not good enough and now

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Speaker 1: I'm lacking confidence. No, that external source, that external situation.

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Speaker 1: In that type of person, this external roadblock would have

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Speaker 1: no real effect on their confidence because their confidence is

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Speaker 1: something that comes from inside and no external source, no person,

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Speaker 1: no setback, can ever touch that, right, because they actually

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Speaker 1: have no real control over the way that this person

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Speaker 1: does or doesn't feel about themselves. Again, you are the

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Speaker 1: one in power. You get to declare how you are

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Speaker 1: feeling and what you think about yourself. And as somebody

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Speaker 1: who has struggled with maintaining self confidence throughout my entire life,

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Speaker 1: probably you know, till this day. In certain moments, I

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Speaker 1: relate to this whole concept on a very personal level.

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Speaker 1: Like I know, I've talked a bit about an opportunity

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Speaker 1: that I was up for about a year ago, a

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Speaker 1: big hosting opportunity, Like when I was auditioning for this

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Speaker 1: big gig and they just had me, you know, auditioning

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Speaker 1: over and over again, after months and months and months.

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Speaker 1: Like each time that they told me they wanted to

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Speaker 1: extend the audition process, my confidence would would take a hit, right,

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Speaker 1: and I would tell myself that, you know, if I

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Speaker 1: was that good of a host, they would have just

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Speaker 1: offered me this job already. And like in that moment,

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Speaker 1: with those thoughts, I temporarily gave my confidence away, right,

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Speaker 1: I allowed somebody else to be in control of the

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Speaker 1: way I felt about myself. I doubted myself and my

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Speaker 1: ability to continue, you know, making a living doing what

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Speaker 1: I love. Right, And when that whole process inevitably ended

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Speaker 1: and the opportunity didn't present itself for a multitude of reasons,

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Speaker 1: like I was left feeling like maybe I should just

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Speaker 1: kind of begin to rethink my long term plan, because

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Speaker 1: if these people who are industry professionals don't believe that

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Speaker 1: that I was good enough, or you know, didn't believe

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Speaker 1: that I could save the show, maybe this isn't you know,

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Speaker 1: what I'm what I'm cut out for. And that that

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Speaker 1: stayed with me for a bit, and then eventually, as

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Speaker 1: the healing process happened, I began to remember who I

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Speaker 1: am and what I believe in and all that I've accomplished,

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Speaker 1: and I began to build that confidence back internally. I

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Speaker 1: stopped relying on external things or people to tell me

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Speaker 1: that I was good enough, and I was just telling

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Speaker 1: myself that I was more than good enough. Right And

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Speaker 1: literally the next thing that happened a couple months later,

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Speaker 1: I developed and sold this podcast that you're listening to

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Speaker 1: right now, right with me as the host. So none

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Speaker 1: of those things were a sign of me not being

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Speaker 1: good enough. They're a sign of life in general, different

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Speaker 1: people's opinions, different external situations within companies, financials, all these

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Speaker 1: different things that amounted to that opportunity potentially not happening, right,

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Speaker 1: And when I allowed myself to stop taking the blame

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Speaker 1: for it, and I just sat back and built up

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Speaker 1: the confidence inside of myself. I went and saw the

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Speaker 1: other opportunities that were available before me, and I took

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Speaker 1: advantage of them, and by declaring that I was unafraid

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Speaker 1: to then go out after the next opportunity. And that's

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Speaker 1: what I'm trying to really push for anybody listening to

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Speaker 1: this and why confidence in oneself and having it internally

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Speaker 1: is so important, you know, in our existence here on

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Speaker 1: a planet Earth. Now, with that said, you have heard

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Speaker 1: from from Ditty, we have heard from one of the

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Speaker 1: stoic Seneca. I've given you a more of my story.

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Speaker 1: Now let's talk about how you can make it your

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Speaker 1: monstra for today. But first let's take a quick break

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Speaker 1: and then we'll be quite back, all right. So we

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Speaker 1: have been talking about this idea of confidence and how

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Speaker 1: it starts and ends with you. Now let's talk about

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Speaker 1: how you can make it your manstra for today. Now,

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Speaker 1: I think it starts with understanding that opportunities are going

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Speaker 1: to come and go, both professionally and personally. You know,

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Speaker 1: you can't allow them to have an effect on your

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Speaker 1: confidence in the long term, right, Like they aren't always

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Speaker 1: a sign of your capability, right, Like they could just

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Speaker 1: be timing at the end of the day, right, or

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Speaker 1: one person's particular taste. But it doesn't necessarily mean that

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Speaker 1: that you're not good enough right now. Of course, there

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Speaker 1: is a gray area. I'm trying to stay positive not

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Speaker 1: go to hartbout it too much. But there are some

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Speaker 1: of you who probably should just give up on maybe

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Speaker 1: your dream of being a rapper or something like that,

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Speaker 1: and the pivot to maybe something in the business, whatever

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Speaker 1: it might be. You have to be honest with yourself

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Speaker 1: if you are genuinely good at what you're trying to do,

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Speaker 1: or if it's just sort of you haven't found the

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Speaker 1: right situation. But again that's the gray area generally speaking,

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Speaker 1: anytime we feel like we are not good enough or

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Speaker 1: we have a situation that we don't get the opportunity

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Speaker 1: we hoped for. Again, there are probably so many other

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Speaker 1: factors involved. Like even Diddy, even he had people who

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Speaker 1: didn't necessarily see his value in the same way that

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Speaker 1: that he saw himself. Right, Like even he got fired

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Speaker 1: at one point, he got fired by Andre Herrell at

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Speaker 1: Uptown Records, and that eventually led to him, you know,

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Speaker 1: going out and starting bad Boy. But again, like if

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Speaker 1: Diddy would have taken that as like a sign that

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Speaker 1: he's just not cut out for this industry. Like what

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Speaker 1: would music as a whole look like right now? My

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Speaker 1: childhood would have been incredible different if Diddy would have

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Speaker 1: just called it quits right there, because he allowed someone

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Speaker 1: else to control whether or not he felt confident enough

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Speaker 1: to keep on going after his dreams. Right. So that's

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Speaker 1: what we have to keep in mind. Like, there are

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Speaker 1: so many circumstances at play and at work that you know,

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Speaker 1: end up being the thing that determines whether or not

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Speaker 1: we get to, you know, have this job that we wanted,

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Speaker 1: or create a relationship with this person, whatever it might be.

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Speaker 1: And we have to be in control of that confidence,

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Speaker 1: right and never allow any external source or any external

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Speaker 1: person to dictate whether or not we think we are

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Speaker 1: good enough to keep on going after whatever it is

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Speaker 1: that we want in this life. Right. So to recap,

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Speaker 1: Diddy is unapologetically his biggest fan. And that's what you

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Speaker 1: have to be. You have to tell yourself all about

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Speaker 1: your greatness. You have to tell yourself that you're you're

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Speaker 1: you know, your potential is limitless, right, you have to

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Speaker 1: declare it for yourself. You cannot wait for anybody else

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Speaker 1: to tell you that. Right and, in the words of Seneca,

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Speaker 1: the difficulties that we have in this life shouldn't dictate

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Speaker 1: how we feel about ourselves. Right Like again, our lack

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Speaker 1: of confidence isn't from any let down or setback that

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Speaker 1: we've had in our life. It's from us relinquishing control

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Speaker 1: of our confidence to some sort of external circumstance or person.

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Speaker 1: If we don't do that, then that means nothing can

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Speaker 1: dictate how we do or don't feel about ourselves. Right

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Speaker 1: and for me, had I have listened to that part

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Speaker 1: of me who is, you know, relinquishing its control of confidence.

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Speaker 1: Had I have just given up to external sources, you know,

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Speaker 1: and told myself, Hey, if these people don't like me

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Speaker 1: enough to give me a job, that must mean I'm

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Speaker 1: not good enough. Had I have done that, I would

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Speaker 1: be back working some sort of nine to five job

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Speaker 1: that I would be miserable at. Right. But instead, rebuilding

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Speaker 1: that confidence in myself telling myself about my own greatness

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Speaker 1: led to me creating a new opportunity that has given

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Speaker 1: me an incredible life thus far. Again, confidence, it starts

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Speaker 1: and it ends with you. Now with that said, thank

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Speaker 1: you so much for checking out the Street Stoke Podcast.

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Speaker 1: Do your best to apply these concepts that we've discussed

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Speaker 1: today into your everyday life, and I will catch you

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Speaker 1: next time. The Street Stoke Podcast is a production of

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Speaker 1: Ihearts Michael Dura Podcast Network