1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:05,480
Speaker 1: This is John, this is them Okay Storytime podcast hosts,

2
00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:06,000
Speaker 1: and we.

3
00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:09,840
Speaker 2: Have some good story's coming up for you.

4
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:10,640
Speaker 1: That's right.

5
00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:12,280
Speaker 3: But before that, we have a little morsel of a

6
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:15,360
Speaker 3: two minute ad break from the sponsors keeping the show delicious.

7
00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:20,360
Speaker 2: My wife called out my sister's toxic boyfriend. Now the

8
00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:28,000
Speaker 2: family is falling apart. Ah, this is a throwaway account

9
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:29,840
Speaker 2: as I have work colleagues on my main that I

10
00:00:29,840 --> 00:00:32,200
Speaker 2: don't want to know about my family drama, and spelling

11
00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:35,279
Speaker 2: will be rubbish as I'm fuming right now. Obligatory. All

12
00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:37,840
Speaker 2: names have been changed, so for the Backstorre, I thirty

13
00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:40,000
Speaker 2: six female and married to the love of my life

14
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:43,120
Speaker 2: thirty six female. Okay. We met when we were seventeen.

15
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:45,159
Speaker 2: She was out and proud whilst I was still in

16
00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:47,640
Speaker 2: the closet, so we didn't start dating until I came

17
00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:50,199
Speaker 2: out at twenty one. We got married in twenty nineteen

18
00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:52,640
Speaker 2: and have an adopted four year old son. This is

19
00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:54,600
Speaker 2: relevant in a minute. By the way, this comes from

20
00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:56,840
Speaker 2: throwaway annoying a brother in law on the Okay Storytime

21
00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:59,680
Speaker 2: separate it. So my sister's twenty seven female Sarah has

22
00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,600
Speaker 2: a law long term boyfriend twenty eight male Steve, who

23
00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:06,440
Speaker 2: the family cannot stand. They've been together for eight years

24
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,199
Speaker 2: and the whole family has hated him from the first

25
00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:12,640
Speaker 2: time we met him. He is rude, obnoxious, arrogant, and

26
00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:15,119
Speaker 2: all in all a crappy human being. He is also

27
00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,640
Speaker 2: someone that likes to claim that he's just being honest,

28
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:19,880
Speaker 2: but if someone is on his back to him, he

29
00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:22,440
Speaker 2: flips out and sulks like a toddler. In fact, my

30
00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:25,319
Speaker 2: toddler is better behaved than him. He isn't abusive to

31
00:01:25,360 --> 00:01:28,200
Speaker 2: Sarah and doesn't direct these comments towards her, it's just

32
00:01:28,280 --> 00:01:30,319
Speaker 2: the rest of us. He's actually a good partner to

33
00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:33,040
Speaker 2: her and treats her well, which is his one redeeming quality.

34
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:35,480
Speaker 2: My Dad and Kay hate him the most and will

35
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:39,080
Speaker 2: do anything to avoid him. At family gatherings. Kay usually

36
00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:42,000
Speaker 2: just ignores him and brushes off anything he says to

37
00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:44,920
Speaker 2: her as she doesn't like conflict. However, there have been

38
00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:47,200
Speaker 2: a few occasions that she has said something back, but

39
00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:50,360
Speaker 2: it's usually said in a joking manner, which amuses my

40
00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:52,960
Speaker 2: dad to no end. My mom is a peacekeeper and

41
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:55,960
Speaker 2: will do anything to avoid drama, so she just changes

42
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,720
Speaker 2: the topic whenever he starts, but She and my grandparents

43
00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:01,560
Speaker 2: all hate him just as much as the rest of us.

44
00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:04,400
Speaker 2: Sarah is the only one that obviously doesn't hate him.

45
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:07,520
Speaker 2: Our son's birth mother, Tests was Kay's best friend who

46
00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:11,160
Speaker 2: sadly passed away in twenty twenty one. Oh This was

47
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:13,720
Speaker 2: a real shock, as she had an underlying heart condition

48
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,120
Speaker 2: that she didn't know about and simply went to sleep

49
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:18,880
Speaker 2: one night and never woke up. Jack had been left

50
00:02:18,919 --> 00:02:22,360
Speaker 2: alone and is caught all days screaming for his mom

51
00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:25,720
Speaker 2: before Kay got worried that Tess wasn't answering her texts

52
00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:27,880
Speaker 2: and went to their house to see if she was okay.

53
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:31,040
Speaker 2: That is awful. She found Jack and is caught and

54
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:34,040
Speaker 2: Tests in her bed. Wow, we adopted Jack as no

55
00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:36,320
Speaker 2: one in Tessa's family was in a position to take

56
00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:38,880
Speaker 2: him in. We raise him as our own, but he

57
00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:41,639
Speaker 2: knows who Tess is. Obviously, this is a very sensitive

58
00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:44,359
Speaker 2: topic for Kay as it was so traumatic for her

59
00:02:44,360 --> 00:02:47,560
Speaker 2: and Jack. Now onto what happened last weekend. It was

60
00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:50,839
Speaker 2: the anniversary of Tessa's passing away on Saturday, so Kay,

61
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:53,120
Speaker 2: Jack and I went to visit her grave. Kay is

62
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,560
Speaker 2: always quiet after going to see her, and this time

63
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:58,240
Speaker 2: of year is especially hard for her. On Sunday, we

64
00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:01,160
Speaker 2: had a family gathering at my parents. These happened every

65
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,400
Speaker 2: couple of months as just to catch up for everyone.

66
00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:05,640
Speaker 2: At first, nothing was out of the ordinary. Kay and

67
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:07,960
Speaker 2: my dad were off to the side talking as usual.

68
00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:11,480
Speaker 2: Only I could see that Kay was obviously struggling, so

69
00:03:11,639 --> 00:03:13,600
Speaker 2: my dad and her went for a walk so she

70
00:03:13,639 --> 00:03:16,280
Speaker 2: could clear her head. This is something they have done before,

71
00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:19,760
Speaker 2: so nothing too unusual. However, Steve had an issue with

72
00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:22,520
Speaker 2: this and asked why they had left and why he

73
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:25,880
Speaker 2: wasn't invited to walk with them. Because you're not. Because

74
00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:28,160
Speaker 2: you're freaking not. That's all there is to it. I

75
00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:30,720
Speaker 2: explained about Tess and Kay just needed a minute. This

76
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:32,800
Speaker 2: wasn't good enough for Steve, though, and he said she

77
00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,440
Speaker 2: should have gotten over it by now.

78
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,640
Speaker 4: Oh man, it's always the wrong thing to say.

79
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:41,760
Speaker 2: At this, my granddad, who is naturally a very quiet guy,

80
00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,640
Speaker 2: said that his best friend had passed over twenty years

81
00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:47,200
Speaker 2: ago and he still had days where he missed him

82
00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:50,080
Speaker 2: so much it hurt. Oh, you don't just get over

83
00:03:50,120 --> 00:03:53,119
Speaker 2: something like that. Steve shut up After that, good, Kay

84
00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:54,760
Speaker 2: and my dad got back and she was in a

85
00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:57,200
Speaker 2: much better mood. We all sat down at the table

86
00:03:57,240 --> 00:04:00,160
Speaker 2: for our late lunch and started chatting. Everything was fine

87
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:03,560
Speaker 2: at first until Steve started trying to butt into Kay's

88
00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:06,360
Speaker 2: conversation with my granddad. When it was obvious that they

89
00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:09,320
Speaker 2: weren't going to include him, he very loudly stated, this

90
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:12,240
Speaker 2: is ps. She's getting all the tension from everyone because

91
00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:15,640
Speaker 2: her friend passed threefing years ago. Get over it, for

92
00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:18,039
Speaker 2: f's sake, we're all sick of hearing about it. Oh

93
00:04:18,080 --> 00:04:23,880
Speaker 2: my god, I'm plungching it. I'm throwing hands. This is

94
00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:27,840
Speaker 2: You're a terrible person. Yes, Steve, you are satan spawn.

95
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:31,000
Speaker 2: The whole table went silent, and I took one look

96
00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:33,440
Speaker 2: at Kay and knew she was about to go off

97
00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:35,960
Speaker 2: on Steve. Only it didn't happen the way I thought.

98
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:39,280
Speaker 2: Rather than exploding at him, she looked at him very

99
00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:42,679
Speaker 2: calmly and said that her and granddad weren't talking about tests.

100
00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:45,679
Speaker 2: They were making plans to take him to the Christmas markets,

101
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,839
Speaker 2: but if he wanted to be a wiener, then no problem.

102
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:49,839
Speaker 2: She then went on to Satan that everyone in the

103
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:53,440
Speaker 2: family hates him because he's a toxic, narcissistic f wad

104
00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:55,760
Speaker 2: that whenever he can't come to a family gathering, the

105
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:57,880
Speaker 2: whole family is much happier. That there is a reason

106
00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,839
Speaker 2: he has no friends and that his own family can't

107
00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:02,360
Speaker 2: to be around him. That reason is that he's rotten

108
00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:04,680
Speaker 2: from the inside out. And that test may have only

109
00:05:04,720 --> 00:05:06,719
Speaker 2: been on the planet for thirty two years, but she

110
00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:09,440
Speaker 2: had made a bigger impact on people than he would

111
00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:11,760
Speaker 2: if he lived until he was one hundred and fifty,

112
00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:14,599
Speaker 2: But that our family was rammed with people because she

113
00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:17,360
Speaker 2: was so loved, Whereas he'd be lucky if anyone other

114
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,000
Speaker 2: than Sarah went to his.

115
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:27,240
Speaker 5: Just whoa justbliterated him? Yeah, that was and she said

116
00:05:27,279 --> 00:05:32,039
Speaker 5: all that calmly. Yeah, she freaking nailed that. What a response,

117
00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:33,720
Speaker 5: What a response?

118
00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:37,560
Speaker 2: Amazing? No, No, she's my hero, she's my hero. Oh no,

119
00:05:37,680 --> 00:05:41,320
Speaker 2: she's both of our heroes. Yeah that was incredible. Wow,

120
00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:42,720
Speaker 2: Wow wow wowow.

121
00:05:42,480 --> 00:05:46,800
Speaker 4: Stellar performance, incredible, incredible. So did they does she actually

122
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,120
Speaker 4: say that to him or does that just what they

123
00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:51,720
Speaker 4: were thinking? She said that amazing, amazing.

124
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,320
Speaker 2: After that, she got up and went to the back garden,

125
00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:56,840
Speaker 2: and I followed her. A few minutes later, my dad

126
00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:59,200
Speaker 2: came out and said that he told Sarah and Steve

127
00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:02,240
Speaker 2: to leave. He went back inside and Kay apologized to

128
00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,640
Speaker 2: everyone and said she should have just kept her mouth shut.

129
00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:08,600
Speaker 2: No girl, nah, no, he needed to hear it. Everyone

130
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:10,520
Speaker 2: other than my mom told her what she had done

131
00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:12,800
Speaker 2: was right and it was about time someone told him.

132
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:15,240
Speaker 2: My dad then found it hilarious that a lesbian had

133
00:06:15,279 --> 00:06:18,240
Speaker 2: been the one to tell him straight, which light in

134
00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:21,320
Speaker 2: the bood a lot, that's funny. We spent the rest

135
00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:23,680
Speaker 2: of the afternoon there before going to pick up Jack

136
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,640
Speaker 2: from Kay's mom's house, as she had had him overnight

137
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,440
Speaker 2: on Saturday for us. The reason I'm making this post

138
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:32,640
Speaker 2: is that yesterday I got a call from Sarah saying

139
00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:35,680
Speaker 2: that her and Steve wanted an apology from Kay or

140
00:06:35,720 --> 00:06:40,640
Speaker 2: they weren't going to Christmas. Oh no, oh no, they're

141
00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,279
Speaker 2: not going to Christmas. What are we gonna do?

142
00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:47,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, It's like, well, then I'm not gonna apologize because

143
00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:49,480
Speaker 4: I don't want to apologize.

144
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,480
Speaker 2: There you go. When I reminded her that we wouldn't

145
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,680
Speaker 2: be at Christmas either, as it is our year to

146
00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:56,599
Speaker 2: spend it with Kay's mom, so it made no difference

147
00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:59,000
Speaker 2: to us, she got really upset, saying that she wanted

148
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,479
Speaker 2: an apology because he was way out of line. I

149
00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:04,400
Speaker 2: said she wasn't and that I wouldn't even contemplate asking

150
00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:07,080
Speaker 2: her to apologize because I agreed with everything she said

151
00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:09,600
Speaker 2: and so did everyone else there. She ended the call

152
00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:11,720
Speaker 2: and I just went back to work. Then today my

153
00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,160
Speaker 2: dad called me and asked if Kay's mom would mind

154
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:16,640
Speaker 2: a few more for Christmas, as he was refusing to

155
00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:19,120
Speaker 2: spend it with Steve, so he and my granddad needed

156
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:22,240
Speaker 2: somewhere else to go. Apparently, after Sarah had called me,

157
00:07:22,440 --> 00:07:25,000
Speaker 2: she called mom and started ranting, and my mom had

158
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:27,360
Speaker 2: told my dad to get Kay to apologize, but she

159
00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:29,280
Speaker 2: said no to and they had an argument, and my

160
00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:32,160
Speaker 2: dad has now decided that he's done with Steve, even

161
00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,440
Speaker 2: if it affects his relationship with Sarah. He's not having

162
00:07:35,480 --> 00:07:38,200
Speaker 2: it anymore. My mom wants Sarah there and she won't

163
00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:41,120
Speaker 2: go without Steve, so my dad is going somewhere else,

164
00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:44,200
Speaker 2: and my granddad agreed with him. I text Kay's mom

165
00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:46,600
Speaker 2: and she said they were welcome. So now my mom

166
00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:49,240
Speaker 2: is furious and said that my dad and Kay are

167
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:53,400
Speaker 2: ripping the family aparts, or maybe Steve just freaking sucks.

168
00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:57,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's okay though that, like you know, this.

169
00:07:57,240 --> 00:08:00,440
Speaker 2: Part of the family gets ripped out of it. Yeah,

170
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:04,480
Speaker 2: are we really losing anyway? Nah? Exactly. So basically this

171
00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,840
Speaker 2: is turned into a crap show. Kay has said she

172
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,640
Speaker 2: will apologize if I want to, just to keep the peace,

173
00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:12,640
Speaker 2: but I've told her no way. Everything she said was true.

174
00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:14,280
Speaker 2: I just don't know where to go from here. And

175
00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:16,560
Speaker 2: the people in my life all hate Steve that much

176
00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:19,080
Speaker 2: that Kay could have physically attacked him and they would

177
00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,160
Speaker 2: all still think she's in the right. So that's why

178
00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:25,440
Speaker 2: I'm asking Internet strangers who might have had to deal

179
00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,920
Speaker 2: with difficult family members, what can we do to get

180
00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:30,200
Speaker 2: into a place where we can be around each other

181
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:33,120
Speaker 2: and the complete I'm struggling to see away right now. Wow,

182
00:08:33,559 --> 00:08:35,640
Speaker 2: didn't realize how long this got until I went to

183
00:08:35,679 --> 00:08:38,400
Speaker 2: post it. Sorry about that, And there are some comments

184
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:40,240
Speaker 2: and an update. But what do you think, op he

185
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:40,600
Speaker 2: can do?

186
00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:44,000
Speaker 4: Just remind me is this like, is there any other

187
00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:45,480
Speaker 4: issues with Like is the other.

188
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:49,920
Speaker 2: Family saying anything about like the mom is mom, Sarah

189
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:52,400
Speaker 2: and Steve and that's it. Everyone else is on a

190
00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:58,000
Speaker 2: peace side. I feel like, you know, they'll survive.

191
00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:01,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, they'll survive because he did say very out of

192
00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:05,760
Speaker 4: pocket things about grieving, you know, and so I feel

193
00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:08,240
Speaker 4: like no one else likes him exactly.

194
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:11,680
Speaker 2: Honestly, I think it might sort itself out because if

195
00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:15,400
Speaker 2: everyone else in the family beside your mom is against them,

196
00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:18,439
Speaker 2: then you guys just keep having Christmas parties and then

197
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:20,880
Speaker 2: eventually Steve and Sarah you'd be like, well, we're not

198
00:09:21,040 --> 00:09:22,040
Speaker 2: it's not fair that we're.

199
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,839
Speaker 4: Not invited, right, and then they just want to come anyway.

200
00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:27,480
Speaker 4: And honestly, to like, I wonder if the mom, like

201
00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:31,920
Speaker 4: partially is just trying to keep the peace, and that's

202
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:33,840
Speaker 4: what I'm thinking, Yeah, just trying to keep the peace.

203
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:39,520
Speaker 2: It's like she probably does agree with we want everyone together. Yeah,

204
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:42,200
Speaker 2: so it's like it. I think it will work that

205
00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:46,520
Speaker 2: you're right standard ground, and then everything will happened the

206
00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:50,719
Speaker 2: way people who are wrong will, you know, just get

207
00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,480
Speaker 2: what they get and get glad that everyone else agrees

208
00:09:53,520 --> 00:09:56,719
Speaker 2: with you, so you're good. Some of Opie's comments, one

209
00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,679
Speaker 2: commenter says for things to be peaceful, both parties need

210
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:02,720
Speaker 2: to want Kay did nothing wrong. I wouldn't ever spend

211
00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,360
Speaker 2: another moment with Steve. I would let Sarah know I

212
00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:08,200
Speaker 2: love her and we'll see her anytime anywhere, but I'll

213
00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,560
Speaker 2: never see Steve again. If you have one guest that

214
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:13,080
Speaker 2: basically wants to crap on the holiday table. There is

215
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,880
Speaker 2: no path forward with them. Opie responds. If it was

216
00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:18,440
Speaker 2: just Sarah upset, then I wouldn't care. But it's my mom.

217
00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,960
Speaker 2: She tries so hard to keep the whole family together

218
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,800
Speaker 2: and she's devastated by what's going on. If it wasn't

219
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:25,920
Speaker 2: for her, then Sarah could take a running jump for

220
00:10:25,960 --> 00:10:28,520
Speaker 2: all I care right now, and then Sarah, this is

221
00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:31,160
Speaker 2: the issue that Steve and Sarah don't see anything wrong

222
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:33,720
Speaker 2: in what he's done. It was just him being honest.

223
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,360
Speaker 2: I would be happier for her to apologize if Steve

224
00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,199
Speaker 2: and Sarah admitted that what he said was in the

225
00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:41,240
Speaker 2: wrong as well. Without that, I'm being stubborn about it,

226
00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:43,880
Speaker 2: as you should. Yeah, my dad told Kay he will

227
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,040
Speaker 2: fall out with her if she apologizes, as she did

228
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:48,520
Speaker 2: nothing wrong. Good on the Dad. There was no screaming

229
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:50,880
Speaker 2: or shouting. She said it very calmly. I feel like

230
00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:53,400
Speaker 2: I'm stuck between making my mom happy and doing what

231
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,320
Speaker 2: I believe to be right. You should always be doing

232
00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:57,679
Speaker 2: what you believe to be right exactly, and things will

233
00:10:57,720 --> 00:10:59,400
Speaker 2: be you know, things will happen the way're supposed to

234
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:03,200
Speaker 2: other commentery, Opie says, my sister doesn't see anything wrong

235
00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:05,679
Speaker 2: in what he says, as he's just being honest, but

236
00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,520
Speaker 2: loses it when someone is honest back. I don't understand

237
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:11,439
Speaker 2: her anymore, Opie says about her mom, take the high

238
00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:13,720
Speaker 2: road and rise above it has been two of my

239
00:11:13,800 --> 00:11:16,520
Speaker 2: mom's favorite things to say over the years. I just

240
00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:18,960
Speaker 2: feel like enough is enough. He crossed a line this

241
00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:21,680
Speaker 2: time that he can't come back from. I especially don't

242
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:23,640
Speaker 2: want my son around him when he's saying things like

243
00:11:23,679 --> 00:11:29,480
Speaker 2: that about tests. Absolutely yeah, absolutely yeah. To another commenter,

244
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,400
Speaker 2: Obi says, if I hear my mom say take the

245
00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,920
Speaker 2: high road one more time, I'm going to scream. I'm

246
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:35,600
Speaker 2: sick of the high road. I've been on it for

247
00:11:35,679 --> 00:11:38,400
Speaker 2: hot eight years. I'm happy on the low road now.

248
00:11:38,559 --> 00:11:41,199
Speaker 2: And then later that day, Opie says, well, I've just

249
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:43,640
Speaker 2: found out that my Granny and Pau, my mom's parents,

250
00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:46,480
Speaker 2: are going to my uncle's for Christmas, and Steve's not invited,

251
00:11:46,559 --> 00:11:49,240
Speaker 2: So it looks like it's just going to be my Mom, Sarah,

252
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,760
Speaker 2: and Steve for Christmas this year. How op he feels

253
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:54,320
Speaker 2: about that vindicated, as my mom is like her parents,

254
00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:57,200
Speaker 2: they're all peacekeepers, and if ever they have had enough,

255
00:11:57,400 --> 00:12:00,280
Speaker 2: then it shows that he's not just stepped over the line,

256
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:03,120
Speaker 2: he ran right past it. And then he continues. Kay's

257
00:12:03,160 --> 00:12:05,400
Speaker 2: mom has already told her that if she changes her mind.

258
00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:08,720
Speaker 2: If the mom changes her mind, then she is welcome

259
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:11,200
Speaker 2: at her house, even if it's Christmas morning. She's more

260
00:12:11,240 --> 00:12:14,079
Speaker 2: than welcome. Obviously, Steve and Sarah aren't invited at all,

261
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,360
Speaker 2: but it's good that my mom has an option at

262
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:19,280
Speaker 2: the least. Later reflection, Opie says, I have realized that

263
00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:22,080
Speaker 2: he's been trying to target Ka and my dad's relationship,

264
00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:24,319
Speaker 2: as they're very close. I think that's. Yeah, that was

265
00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:26,280
Speaker 2: pretty apparent because he was like, oh, I can't go

266
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:29,360
Speaker 2: on the walk. He's trying to like infiltrate it and

267
00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:33,840
Speaker 2: get what Ka has. But you have to be cool

268
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,720
Speaker 2: and a good person, yeah, and it seems like you're neither.

269
00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:39,400
Speaker 2: The people have to like wike you around. Yeah. To

270
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:42,240
Speaker 2: have a relationship with a person's father, you gotta they

271
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:44,120
Speaker 2: have to like you a little bit, just a little

272
00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:47,240
Speaker 2: at least. They have traveled all over the country visiting

273
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,559
Speaker 2: class car shows together, which Steve has tried to get

274
00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:51,720
Speaker 2: in on, but he doesn't know anything about cars, so

275
00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:53,960
Speaker 2: there's no point in him going even if they did

276
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,920
Speaker 2: like him. I actually think he's been trying to push

277
00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:57,720
Speaker 2: K and I out of the family so that he

278
00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:01,600
Speaker 2: gets my dad to himself, even though my dad can't stantem.

279
00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:05,680
Speaker 2: Update eight days later, Hi, I know how much this

280
00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:07,959
Speaker 2: community loves an update, so I thought I would give

281
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:10,240
Speaker 2: you one. As things seemed to be sorting themselves out

282
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:13,120
Speaker 2: after I wrote my last post, A few things happened

283
00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:15,320
Speaker 2: in the next couple of hours. First thing was that

284
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:17,719
Speaker 2: I spoke to my grandparents on my mom's side. They

285
00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,280
Speaker 2: were there when this all happened, but they're like my

286
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:23,040
Speaker 2: mom and just constantly try to keep the peace. That's

287
00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:24,840
Speaker 2: where she gets it from. They were supposed to be

288
00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:27,240
Speaker 2: spending Christmas with my mom this year, but had changed

289
00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:30,000
Speaker 2: their minds and decided to spend it with my uncle instead.

290
00:13:30,040 --> 00:13:32,720
Speaker 2: They have made the decision to not be around Steve either,

291
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,280
Speaker 2: as he causes too much drama. They asked if they

292
00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:37,120
Speaker 2: could come and see us and Jack on the twenty

293
00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:39,080
Speaker 2: third before they head off to my uncle's, which I

294
00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:42,920
Speaker 2: happily agreed. Lovely. This really surprised me, and it outright

295
00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:45,319
Speaker 2: shocked my mom. As like I said, they are the

296
00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:47,840
Speaker 2: biggest take the high road type people I've ever met.

297
00:13:47,920 --> 00:13:50,880
Speaker 2: But even they'd had enough. The next thing that happened

298
00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:52,960
Speaker 2: was my dad called to let me know that Steve

299
00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,719
Speaker 2: and Sarah had now decided that they wanted Kay to

300
00:13:55,840 --> 00:13:58,960
Speaker 2: make a public apology in front of the whole family

301
00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:02,640
Speaker 2: and admit she was lying, and that the family loves you.

302
00:14:03,160 --> 00:14:07,120
Speaker 2: What she can't what?

303
00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:09,440
Speaker 5: No like?

304
00:14:09,559 --> 00:14:12,720
Speaker 2: You have no leverage is the thing? Yeah, you've got

305
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:16,560
Speaker 2: no leverage, right, No one likes you. He was laughing

306
00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:18,920
Speaker 2: as he told me this and called them delusional, so

307
00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:22,680
Speaker 2: any small chance of a superficial apology went out the window.

308
00:14:22,920 --> 00:14:25,720
Speaker 2: The third thing that happened was jacketting home from after

309
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:29,360
Speaker 2: school club with the recorder that I am sorely tempted

310
00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,720
Speaker 2: to shove up the teacher's backside. So all in all,

311
00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:34,800
Speaker 2: it wasn't a great day. I remember the recorder part

312
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:39,720
Speaker 2: of my elementary school career. Oh yeah, my mom hated

313
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:42,800
Speaker 2: that thing. I don't think any kands slid it like

314
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:45,680
Speaker 2: to Yeah, a bunch of kids not playing the recorder

315
00:14:45,680 --> 00:14:48,040
Speaker 2: who don't know how to play the recorder right right?

316
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:48,400
Speaker 3: Yeah?

317
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:48,720
Speaker 1: No, I.

318
00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,920
Speaker 4: Live like right across the street from an elementary school,

319
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:54,600
Speaker 4: and like you know the school I went to, and

320
00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:57,480
Speaker 4: like everyone in my neighborhood was like kids around the

321
00:14:57,520 --> 00:14:59,880
Speaker 4: same age, and so like every year it'd be like, oh,

322
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,240
Speaker 4: persons to the recorders to play record.

323
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:12,120
Speaker 2: It's just like that. So it was like speaking exactly exactly. Yeah. Though,

324
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,200
Speaker 2: through talking to people on here, I also realized that

325
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,320
Speaker 2: Steve has been trying to push Ky and I out

326
00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:20,000
Speaker 2: of the family, organizing trips that he knows we wouldn't

327
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,480
Speaker 2: have gone on them anyway, as a week and away

328
00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:23,560
Speaker 2: with him sounds worse than a paper cut to the eyeball,

329
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:26,000
Speaker 2: and him constantly trying to get my dad away from

330
00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:28,320
Speaker 2: k whenever we were all together. I think this is

331
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:31,760
Speaker 2: because he is jealous of Kay and my dad's relationship. Anyway,

332
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:34,480
Speaker 2: things went quiet for a few days until the weekend.

333
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:37,040
Speaker 2: Our town has a big Christmas fare that runs from

334
00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:40,920
Speaker 2: November through December, and we always go to it with mom, dad, granddad,

335
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:43,280
Speaker 2: and Ka's mom. We decided to cheer my mom up

336
00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:45,160
Speaker 2: a bit to go on Sunday and then out for

337
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:47,360
Speaker 2: a dinner. After my mom was told that if Sarah

338
00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:49,840
Speaker 2: or Steve showed up then we would all leave and

339
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:52,120
Speaker 2: she promised they wouldn't be there. Things were a bit

340
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,320
Speaker 2: awkward at first, but settled after a while. At one point,

341
00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:57,400
Speaker 2: Jack got my mom and dad to take him on

342
00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,600
Speaker 2: the giant snowslide, and as my mom walked back over

343
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:03,160
Speaker 2: to us, she had tears in her eyes. I pulled

344
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:05,000
Speaker 2: her to one side to see what was going on,

345
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,960
Speaker 2: and she said that whilst waiting in line, Jacket said

346
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,520
Speaker 2: he was happy Uncle Steve wasn't here. When my mom

347
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:13,800
Speaker 2: asked why, he said that Uncle Steve was a bad man.

348
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:15,840
Speaker 2: My mom tried to say that he wasn't, but in

349
00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:18,680
Speaker 2: typical stubborn four year old fashion, he had argued and

350
00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,880
Speaker 2: said he learnt in school that people who say mean

351
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:23,280
Speaker 2: things all the time are bad people, and Uncle Steve

352
00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:25,000
Speaker 2: said mean things all the time, so he was a

353
00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:29,040
Speaker 2: bad man, and that he didn't like him based base.

354
00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:33,920
Speaker 2: How are you gonna argue with that, dang mom. Yeah,

355
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:35,920
Speaker 2: there had been a case of bullying in his class

356
00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:37,600
Speaker 2: a few weeks ago, and the teacher had done a

357
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:40,360
Speaker 2: lesson on how wrong bullying is, so I think that's

358
00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:43,440
Speaker 2: where this came from. This finally broke through to my mom.

359
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,320
Speaker 2: If even a four year old can see what a

360
00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:47,920
Speaker 2: horrible prick the man is. Then she had two as well.

361
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,680
Speaker 2: She said that she felt stuck because she hated Steve.

362
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:54,680
Speaker 2: She's like, I didn't know to tell you I hate

363
00:16:55,120 --> 00:16:57,160
Speaker 2: I hate him so much, but I was trying to

364
00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,040
Speaker 2: keep the peace and agreed with everything that came. She

365
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,240
Speaker 2: had said, but she loves Sarah and doesn't want to isolator.

366
00:17:03,400 --> 00:17:05,080
Speaker 2: I told her I would always be there for her,

367
00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:08,640
Speaker 2: but I wasn't putting myself, Jack or Kay through being

368
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:11,239
Speaker 2: around Steve again, and she needed to think about what

369
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:13,920
Speaker 2: she wants, not what I want or Dad or Kay

370
00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:16,879
Speaker 2: or Jack or her parents or Sarah or Steve, but

371
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:19,399
Speaker 2: what she wants. She went quiet and then said that

372
00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:21,520
Speaker 2: Kay's mom had told her she was welcome at hers

373
00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:23,760
Speaker 2: for Christmas if she wanted to, and that she could

374
00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,280
Speaker 2: decide on Christmas Day if she wanted. Kay's mom would

375
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:29,080
Speaker 2: save her a plate. This is lovely. Yeah, this is

376
00:17:29,119 --> 00:17:32,440
Speaker 2: going well. And we went back to the group, and

377
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:34,720
Speaker 2: a little while later I saw Mom and Kay's mom

378
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:38,080
Speaker 2: having a deep discussion whilst walking behind us. Neither will

379
00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:40,200
Speaker 2: say what they talked about, but Mom seemed a bit

380
00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:43,080
Speaker 2: happier after their talk. They have also been talking since

381
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,199
Speaker 2: as yesterday, my mom told me that she will be

382
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:47,879
Speaker 2: coming to Kay's mom's for Christmas, and they've been talking

383
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:50,879
Speaker 2: about going shopping together next week. When Mom told Sarah

384
00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:54,760
Speaker 2: after calling me, Sarah predictably lost her mind and said

385
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,440
Speaker 2: that mom was choosing us over her. My mom told

386
00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:59,840
Speaker 2: her she was choosing to have a good Christmas rather

387
00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:03,480
Speaker 2: then being belittled and made miserable, all for the sake

388
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:06,800
Speaker 2: of Steve and is so called honesty. Sarah then called

389
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,920
Speaker 2: me and asked if I was happy that I'd won.

390
00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:13,240
Speaker 2: She then did the unforgivable ough and used a few

391
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:19,080
Speaker 2: homophobic slurs towards me and Kay called Jack the B

392
00:18:19,359 --> 00:18:24,760
Speaker 2: word of a or. I ended the call, blocked her everywhere,

393
00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:26,919
Speaker 2: and then let my family know what had happened, and

394
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:29,359
Speaker 2: then I never wanted to speak to her again. They're

395
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,480
Speaker 2: all as appalled as I am, and my Ganny mom's

396
00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:35,359
Speaker 2: mum called Sarah and apparently told her that she was

397
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:38,080
Speaker 2: passed away to her and she wouldn't have a bigot

398
00:18:38,119 --> 00:18:41,520
Speaker 2: in the family. Wow, crops to the family for not

399
00:18:41,720 --> 00:18:45,840
Speaker 2: for standing on business. Yeah, like I don't. You never

400
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,600
Speaker 2: can talk to us again, right? I Love?

401
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:49,439
Speaker 4: There are so many stories where it's like the family

402
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:53,000
Speaker 4: is like, well, well she's gonna away their family, but

403
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:53,720
Speaker 4: this one is like.

404
00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:56,480
Speaker 2: Girl, get out, get out of heah. You're not welcome

405
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:59,120
Speaker 2: by Christmas because you're a grinch and you don't even

406
00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:04,600
Speaker 2: have a nice redemption arc. Exactly, your heart's drinking. Sarah

407
00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:07,119
Speaker 2: had been trying to reach out to apologize because she

408
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:10,120
Speaker 2: knows she has stepped over the unforgivable line, but I've

409
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,920
Speaker 2: just kept blocking the fake accounts that she's making on Instagram.

410
00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:15,280
Speaker 2: Steve tried reaching out to my dad after this, and

411
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,160
Speaker 2: when he eventually answered, Steve tried to say that Sarah

412
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,040
Speaker 2: was just angry and didn't mean it. I don't care.

413
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:25,399
Speaker 2: I don't care even if you're angry. Using slurs is

414
00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:27,720
Speaker 2: never excuse me, Like what do you mean, because that

415
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:32,080
Speaker 2: means that you that you've thought that you know, you

416
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:34,840
Speaker 2: don't just use slurs willy nilly, right, you've had to

417
00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:37,320
Speaker 2: have used them before, right, or at least have like

418
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,080
Speaker 2: the mindset yehere, like you know, or where you think

419
00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:42,520
Speaker 2: that like it it's not that serious or something like that,

420
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:45,280
Speaker 2: or that that's an okay thing to say, like you

421
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,160
Speaker 2: can't you can't like do something like that and then

422
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:50,280
Speaker 2: just say like, oh, but it didn't mean it. Yeah No,

423
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:53,800
Speaker 2: I just like, can't take that back? Yeah yeah, According

424
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 2: to my mom, and dad ended up giving him a

425
00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:57,960
Speaker 2: verbal lashing and told him that he was the worst

426
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,760
Speaker 2: thing that had ever happened to Sarah and our My

427
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:03,520
Speaker 2: dad has told Sarah he is disgusted with her, but

428
00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:06,160
Speaker 2: will be there for her if she leaves Steve. Until then,

429
00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:09,200
Speaker 2: good luck. Mom has gone a low contact as well,

430
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,399
Speaker 2: but wants to keep the door open so that Sarah

431
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:14,119
Speaker 2: isn't completely isolated. I had a few people saying that

432
00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:16,880
Speaker 2: Steve may be abusive towards Sarah, but I really don't

433
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,239
Speaker 2: think he is. He usually acts like a wiener when

434
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:21,159
Speaker 2: the attention isn't on him. He knows that when he

435
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:23,960
Speaker 2: says wienerish things, then all the attention is on him,

436
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:27,200
Speaker 2: and he revels in it. He's a troll. After Sarah's outburst,

437
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,680
Speaker 2: I just think they're both toxic and feed off each

438
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,000
Speaker 2: other's toxicity. She lets him get away with the things

439
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,480
Speaker 2: he says because she gets pleasure out of watching us

440
00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:37,520
Speaker 2: all bite our tongues and keep quiet. So Mom's angry,

441
00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:42,479
Speaker 2: Dad's angry, Our three grandparents are angry. Extended family's angry

442
00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,600
Speaker 2: and Kay is my rock, but I can tell she's

443
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:48,239
Speaker 2: really angry about what she said towards Jack. I mean,

444
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:51,000
Speaker 2: at least have you have the support system behind you.

445
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:54,080
Speaker 2: Everyone is behind you, and Kay and Jack good, and

446
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,800
Speaker 2: that's like the thing to remember. Like obviously what Steve

447
00:20:56,880 --> 00:21:00,520
Speaker 2: and Sarah said and are doing is despicable. Sad to

448
00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:04,239
Speaker 2: lose a person like your sister, but just know that,

449
00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:07,000
Speaker 2: like you have done nothing wrong, right, and it's just

450
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 2: them being big. It's yep. I'm just sad and done

451
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 2: with it all. At least now I know what she

452
00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 2: really thinks about Jack k and myself. So there's that,

453
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:18,240
Speaker 2: and you know what I think. What do you think, Sophia?

454
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 2: I think you should listen to more episodes and stories

455
00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:24,440
Speaker 2: like this on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or your favorite podcast app.

456
00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:26,679
Speaker 2: Just search about a start time. What a great idea,

457
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:30,480
Speaker 2: I know, That's what I think. Just at just a

458
00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:33,480
Speaker 2: little bought and there is a little bit left. But

459
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:36,800
Speaker 2: do you have any final thoughts? I feel like you

460
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,920
Speaker 2: know you kind of are taking the high road in

461
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:41,080
Speaker 2: a way you are, I mean, you know a way

462
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 2: have you like shouted at her right or like gotten

463
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:46,280
Speaker 2: physically aggressive with her.

464
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:49,280
Speaker 4: Because taking the highroad doesn't have to mean like tolerating

465
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 4: just let me.

466
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 2: It doesn't mean letting someone walk all over you.

467
00:21:51,720 --> 00:21:53,760
Speaker 4: Exactly like you can still handle it in a very

468
00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:58,320
Speaker 4: mature way. And I think that's like very high and

469
00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:00,040
Speaker 4: I think it's what you do, know, and so so

470
00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:04,320
Speaker 4: I think I commend you for that good job.

471
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:07,359
Speaker 2: It's about what's doing. It's about doing what's best for

472
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,399
Speaker 2: your family. And Jack does not need these people around

473
00:22:10,480 --> 00:22:15,040
Speaker 2: him because they suck. Yeah, but there is a little

474
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:18,159
Speaker 2: bit left. Let's get all into it. Nah, not the

475
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 2: perfect update, but we move on. It will be nice

476
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:22,879
Speaker 2: this Christmas to have both sides of the family together

477
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,000
Speaker 2: for the first time and not have to worry about

478
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,639
Speaker 2: Steve being a wiener. But I'm sad that this is

479
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 2: how my relationship with my sister has ended. I'm trying

480
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,760
Speaker 2: to get into the Christmas spirit, but it's a tough

481
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:34,879
Speaker 2: one right now. The only things that are making me

482
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:38,159
Speaker 2: smile are Cay and Jack being goofy idiots trying to

483
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:40,400
Speaker 2: cheer me up. However, the recorder can go to hell.

484
00:22:40,840 --> 00:22:43,639
Speaker 2: I curse whoever invented the thing, Like, seriously, f you,

485
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,159
Speaker 2: thanks for all the support. In my original post and

486
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:50,160
Speaker 2: opening my eyes to a few things. Maybe internet strangers

487
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,320
Speaker 2: are the way to go for advice after all, hope

488
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:54,600
Speaker 2: you all have a good Christmas slash Holidays. And then

489
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,960
Speaker 2: one commoner says, I don't think the wienerish brother in

490
00:22:57,080 --> 00:23:00,119
Speaker 2: law and Sarah Saga have concluded. I'm glad you'll have

491
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:02,400
Speaker 2: a peaceful Christmas and theory. I just think the pair

492
00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:04,520
Speaker 2: of them are not convinced yet that they're shut out.

493
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:07,040
Speaker 2: Obie says, it wouldn't surprise me if they try and

494
00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:09,280
Speaker 2: turn up to my parents for Christmas, but we won't

495
00:23:09,320 --> 00:23:11,480
Speaker 2: be there, so they won't get far. As long as

496
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:14,159
Speaker 2: they stay away from me, okay and Jack, then I

497
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:16,959
Speaker 2: don't care what they do. Colminser says, many small children

498
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:21,360
Speaker 2: playing recorders with more enthusiasm than skill. Follow Steve everywhere,

499
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 2: Follow Steve everywhere. Obi says, this just made me laugh

500
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,879
Speaker 2: a little too hard. Thanks for that, and that is

501
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:32,480
Speaker 2: the end of that story. It's seeming like tough, always tough,

502
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:35,359
Speaker 2: losing a family member right anyway, even if it means

503
00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:37,960
Speaker 2: like cutting them off right. But it does seem like

504
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 2: this was the right decision for everyone involved and handling

505
00:23:41,160 --> 00:23:42,800
Speaker 2: it well, even though it's difficult.

506
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:47,000
Speaker 4: Agree, that's that's and that's amazing, and that's amazing.

507
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:49,840
Speaker 2: Christ just spirit. Yes, but that is the end of

508
00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 2: that story.

509
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:55,479
Speaker 1: My boyfriend and man'spleen farming to my new friend and

510
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:56,720
Speaker 1: now he's not talking to me.

511
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,280
Speaker 3: I do that all the time and people will love it.

512
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:00,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, please plan farming to me.

513
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,160
Speaker 3: So farming is and you're done.

514
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:05,920
Speaker 1: We're not longer talking. I twenty four female, had been

515
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:08,600
Speaker 1: with my boyfriend, twenty eight male for nearly two years.

516
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,320
Speaker 1: He's usually a caring and patient partner and we are

517
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:13,920
Speaker 1: very close. Our relationship was a bit of a slow

518
00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:17,359
Speaker 1: builder because I was inexperienced romantically and very nervous about dating.

519
00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:19,879
Speaker 1: When we first met on an app. My boyfriend James

520
00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:22,000
Speaker 1: fake name for privacy, didn't mind that I was new

521
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,000
Speaker 1: to dating. It was very courteous and patient with me,

522
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 1: and honestly was wonderful about making my romantic first into

523
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,560
Speaker 1: positive memories. By the way, this comes from user available

524
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:33,400
Speaker 1: respect four five six, and you can submit your stories

525
00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:36,879
Speaker 1: on the r slash Okay storytime separated. So James and

526
00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:39,480
Speaker 1: I have very few arguments in our entire relationship. I'm

527
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,080
Speaker 1: a by woman. I've known this for a long time.

528
00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:44,320
Speaker 1: A lot of by women probably know it's so much

529
00:24:44,359 --> 00:24:46,560
Speaker 1: easier to meet guys on apps than finding other women

530
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:49,119
Speaker 1: looking for women. I was open with James from the beginning,

531
00:24:49,119 --> 00:24:51,080
Speaker 1: but I didn't get much of a response regarding this,

532
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,840
Speaker 1: which seemed fine, but I was trying really hard to

533
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:57,000
Speaker 1: present my authentic self and be genuine. Turns out a

534
00:24:57,040 --> 00:25:02,040
Speaker 1: big part of myself is crushing on girls me too. Anyways,

535
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:04,159
Speaker 1: it was only a small thing. I was calling a

536
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,760
Speaker 1: video game character my wife, and James snapped me not

537
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:10,159
Speaker 1: to say that. I tried to defend myself, saying she

538
00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:12,560
Speaker 1: was fictional and not a threat to our relationship. But

539
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,639
Speaker 1: I did start to see it from his side, and

540
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 1: I get that it must have felt disrespectful to him

541
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:19,119
Speaker 1: as my boyfriend. I don't think he's a problem with

542
00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:22,200
Speaker 1: my spiciality. He has a gay male friend and there's

543
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:24,640
Speaker 1: no issue there. If anything, I was glad it wasn't

544
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,080
Speaker 1: the trope of straight dude things. It's hot that I

545
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:29,400
Speaker 1: like women more of the matter at hand. A few

546
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:31,199
Speaker 1: months ago, I did start to feel like I was

547
00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 1: missing out on a real connection with similar minded people,

548
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:36,000
Speaker 1: not romantically, to be clear, but I thought it would

549
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:38,119
Speaker 1: be nice to have queer friends and go to pride

550
00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 1: festivals and whatnot. I'm dating a man, but I'm still

551
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:42,480
Speaker 1: a queer woman and I wanted to meet people I

552
00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 1: could relate to. I started going to local women's LGBTQ

553
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 1: plus casual social meets and has been wonderful. It's a

554
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:51,679
Speaker 1: really laid back and welcoming space. I've become friendly with

555
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 1: quite a few people. I've been invited to outings and dinners.

556
00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:56,720
Speaker 1: I'm so happy I decided to go, as it's had

557
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,120
Speaker 1: a really positive impact on my social life. I only

558
00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:01,280
Speaker 1: had a few friends before, and they were not mutual

559
00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:03,160
Speaker 1: to each other. There is one person from the group

560
00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:05,760
Speaker 1: in particular who have started to become really close to.

561
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:08,199
Speaker 1: She's great. She's so much fun to be around with

562
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:10,880
Speaker 1: and we have so many shared interests. I'm calling her

563
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,800
Speaker 1: Emma twenty five female. Before we go into the story,

564
00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 1: you think we should bring the boyfriend to these events?

565
00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:20,240
Speaker 3: Who ah?

566
00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:22,720
Speaker 1: I think it should be a conversation because, for OP,

567
00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:27,119
Speaker 1: you should be open about what you want with your speciality.

568
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:30,000
Speaker 1: You know, this is something for you to explore. He

569
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:34,600
Speaker 1: should support that, not you like, not necessarily a tug

570
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 1: of war, but that's something you want to explore. He

571
00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 1: should support it full me.

572
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,720
Speaker 3: It just sounds like she wants to meet more people

573
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:42,960
Speaker 3: in that community. Yeah, and Emma could be a friend.

574
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 3: I don't know where this is gonna go, but I

575
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:48,760
Speaker 3: feel like she may develop a little crush on Emma.

576
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, or boyfriend's gonna get really threatened.

577
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:55,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it gets threatened over a video game character.

578
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:56,199
Speaker 2: That Yeah, that's wild.

579
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 1: James has met Emma since she has come over a

580
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,640
Speaker 1: few times already. I live with James, and he said

581
00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:03,679
Speaker 1: she was really cool and he was happy I was

582
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:06,360
Speaker 1: meeting lots of new people. Nice. I have probably been

583
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:08,240
Speaker 1: a lot more chill and bearable to live with since

584
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 1: I'm feeling more fulfilled socially. But that's until this last

585
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:13,520
Speaker 1: week or so, since James has really changed his tune.

586
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:15,360
Speaker 1: I don't think it's possible to give all the context,

587
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 1: but I'm going to keep trying to explain things. The

588
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 1: three of us went to the cinema and got food.

589
00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:21,639
Speaker 1: After Me and Emma were possibly acting a little bit

590
00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:25,399
Speaker 1: obnoxious and talking maybe too loudly about the intensely homerotic

591
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:28,320
Speaker 1: undertones and the Deadpool and Wolverine car scene. I noticed

592
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:30,840
Speaker 1: James glaring, so I was trying to pull it back

593
00:27:30,840 --> 00:27:32,680
Speaker 1: a bit and read the room before I got a

594
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:35,080
Speaker 1: chance to change the subject James and to Emma, could

595
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 1: you not try to ruin the effing film just because

596
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 1: you want to make it gay? In a tone I've

597
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:42,080
Speaker 1: never heard him use before. It kind of flashbanged me,

598
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 1: and I still can't believe the way he looked at her. Amazingly,

599
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:47,120
Speaker 1: she completely shrugged it off and laughed, and our food

600
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,399
Speaker 1: is brought to the table, so things just moved along.

601
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:51,840
Speaker 1: When James and I got home later, I sinsed he

602
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,760
Speaker 1: was being a bit cold towards me, but maybe I

603
00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:55,960
Speaker 1: imagined it. The following morning, I asked if he was

604
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:58,560
Speaker 1: doing okay, as he was still a bit frosty with me.

605
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:02,000
Speaker 1: I apologized for me and Emma maybe being a bit

606
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:05,040
Speaker 1: over the top, but we were having fun. He said

607
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:06,960
Speaker 1: it was fine, but he wants to go and see

608
00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:09,600
Speaker 1: the film again by himself. Kind of puzzling since we

609
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:11,840
Speaker 1: weren't making a sound during the film, but he probably

610
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:13,560
Speaker 1: would have gone to see it again regardless of what

611
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:15,439
Speaker 1: happened with me and Emma. I tried to let that

612
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:17,960
Speaker 1: drop and get on with things, but work is driving

613
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,560
Speaker 1: me mad at the moment. Just a busy season right now,

614
00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:22,960
Speaker 1: and I can go without any more on my plate.

615
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 1: I've been playing a lot of Stardow Valley in my

616
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:26,960
Speaker 1: off time, which is a poor way to distress, since

617
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,440
Speaker 1: I run my form with an intensity that I myself

618
00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:30,359
Speaker 1: cannot comprehend.

619
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:32,520
Speaker 3: And the nerd translation of that is.

620
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,399
Speaker 1: Oh, you're going to me. I don't really play Starduo Valley,

621
00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:38,440
Speaker 1: but it is a farming sim pretty much.

622
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:42,280
Speaker 3: Thank you. He knew what it was, don't don't. Don't

623
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:43,520
Speaker 3: act like you don't know what it is.

624
00:28:43,760 --> 00:28:47,400
Speaker 1: It's more than there's that. It's like, hey, James pops

625
00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,440
Speaker 1: in co Ops sometimes, as he enjoys the game too,

626
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:52,200
Speaker 1: but he prefers the Farming Simulator game series, which is

627
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 1: a more realistic representation of farming. While texting Emma, I

628
00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:58,280
Speaker 1: mentioned Stardu and she asked if she can join me sometime. Joking,

629
00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:01,520
Speaker 1: I asked if a she could handle my iron fisted

630
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:04,480
Speaker 1: rule of the crop fields and B maybe wouldn't feel

631
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 1: like a second job. Emma works in agriculture. Turns out

632
00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:10,520
Speaker 1: she has hundreds of hours logged in and knows what

633
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 1: she's doing, and promised she wouldn't mind the monster I

634
00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:16,840
Speaker 1: become when managing seasonal crop schedules. This is actually really funny.

635
00:29:16,920 --> 00:29:19,600
Speaker 3: This is funny, and I see a little bit of.

636
00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 1: Flirting, playful flirting, but I think it's it's like harmless flirting.

637
00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:28,360
Speaker 3: I'm still keeping an eye on it, okay.

638
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 1: But we I will kind of want to talk about

639
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 1: James getting a little up tight at the movies and

640
00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:37,080
Speaker 1: the comment he said, Oh he's jealous, dude. Yeah, I

641
00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: was gonna say, oh, he's very jealous that you guys

642
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:43,680
Speaker 1: have a connection, but also like maybe he does feel

643
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:46,280
Speaker 1: threatened from Emma just a little bit, And why do

644
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:48,760
Speaker 1: you you didn't have You shouldn't have to apologize having

645
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:52,120
Speaker 1: a good time with your friend, like maybe, oh, I'm

646
00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: sorry that we were a little loud, Like okay, and

647
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 1: be like I'm gonna go fine, we go see a

648
00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:58,280
Speaker 1: movie by myself. I would, I would. I would bring

649
00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 1: up the problem there. I'd be like, hey, what' really

650
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:00,720
Speaker 1: going on?

651
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:01,480
Speaker 3: Yeah.

652
00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:03,240
Speaker 1: Emma and I were playing late in the evening and

653
00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 1: James appeared in the game. We both typed hello to

654
00:30:05,520 --> 00:30:07,040
Speaker 1: him in the chat box, and he left the game

655
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: seconds after I shouted him in the next room. Asking

656
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 1: where he'd gone, but I didn't get a response. I

657
00:30:12,000 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 1: spent a bit more time playing with Emma, stopping around

658
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,880
Speaker 1: Pelicantown and having fun, then turned off the game. I

659
00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:18,600
Speaker 1: went into the living room to see James on the

660
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:21,680
Speaker 1: sofa and knows him playing farming simulator on the PlayStation.

661
00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 1: I joked, asking, did you fancy some real farming the night.

662
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:27,040
Speaker 1: I got a bit of a crappy response, and he

663
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 1: grumbled that he didn't want to interrupt. I told him

664
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,320
Speaker 1: he could have played with us. Then he told me

665
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 1: he's not keen on Emma. M wow.

666
00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:38,280
Speaker 3: I had no idea, didn't see.

667
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 1: That one coming. I didn't want to point out that

668
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 1: he previously said otherwise, people are entitled to change their

669
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:44,760
Speaker 1: minds and opinions. He has friends I'm not keen on,

670
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:47,600
Speaker 1: so this is probably fair. Honestly, I kind of froze

671
00:30:47,680 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 1: up and didn't know what to say. I don't normally

672
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 1: get this kind of attitude from him. Maybe I was

673
00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 1: quiet for too long, because he turned off his game

674
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:55,479
Speaker 1: and he said good night and went to bed. When

675
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 1: I went to bed an hour later, he was still awake,

676
00:30:57,920 --> 00:31:00,719
Speaker 1: and we started talking to summarize how that went. I

677
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:02,480
Speaker 1: asked him if he wanted to tell me what was

678
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:04,640
Speaker 1: going on his mind. He said that he just felt

679
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:07,080
Speaker 1: a bit excluded and he was sorry for being grumpy.

680
00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 1: I apologized for making him feel that way, but I

681
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:11,280
Speaker 1: told him I was happy I had found a good

682
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 1: friend and it was okay if the two of them

683
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 1: just don't mix well together, he doesn't have to see

684
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 1: here all the time. He told me not to hide

685
00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 1: the friendship from him and that he would just work

686
00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:21,400
Speaker 1: it out in himself. I still don't really know what

687
00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:24,200
Speaker 1: that means, but it felt like a peaceful resolution at

688
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:26,560
Speaker 1: the time. I'd weekend plans with Emma and some others

689
00:31:26,560 --> 00:31:28,400
Speaker 1: from the group to go for a walk slash hike,

690
00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:31,280
Speaker 1: and James was originally planning to tag along, but changed

691
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 1: his mind and then changed his back, so we went

692
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:35,360
Speaker 1: together and met up with everybody at the car park.

693
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:37,080
Speaker 1: He seemed to be in a good mood that morning

694
00:31:37,240 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 1: and back to his usual easy going self, and we

695
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 1: were mostly all enjoying a nice scenic walk. We had

696
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:44,920
Speaker 1: one person pointing out different types of trees, one geology

697
00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:48,640
Speaker 1: enthusiast admiring rock formations, and one person passing out home

698
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 1: bake goods. Pretty incredible outing. We were high up and

699
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:55,400
Speaker 1: had great views of the area, mostly forrest and farmland,

700
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,160
Speaker 1: still being huge into the stardew grind. I was joking

701
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:01,520
Speaker 1: about it looking like my farm. It was windy. I

702
00:32:01,560 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 1: didn't hear exactly what was said, but I gathered that

703
00:32:03,640 --> 00:32:06,960
Speaker 1: Emma was talking about farming and James tried to correct

704
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,720
Speaker 1: her on something that was said. I heard Emma say, James,

705
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:12,320
Speaker 1: I'm a real farmer. There were a few laughs, even

706
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:15,080
Speaker 1: from James. In the moment. My heart absolutely crapped itself

707
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: because I thought he was going to snap, but thankfully

708
00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 1: he seemed to shake it off. Later on our way

709
00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:22,880
Speaker 1: back down, we all spread out and I was walking

710
00:32:22,880 --> 00:32:24,880
Speaker 1: next to James and he was looking at his phone

711
00:32:25,120 --> 00:32:27,920
Speaker 1: studying something. He started telling me about the general options

712
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:30,480
Speaker 1: for getting into a career in agriculture. I just nodded

713
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:32,320
Speaker 1: along and hurt him out. I don't want to puke

714
00:32:32,360 --> 00:32:34,160
Speaker 1: fun at him for this timing of this. I think

715
00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:36,440
Speaker 1: this is something he has genuinely considered. He really does

716
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:39,040
Speaker 1: enjoy farming simulator, and it seems like the game has

717
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,320
Speaker 1: taught him a lot about farming. Somebody even must have

718
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:43,720
Speaker 1: overheard this and mentioned it to Emma because when we

719
00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:46,160
Speaker 1: got back to the car park, she came over. She said,

720
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:48,800
Speaker 1: sorry if I was a bit pointed, just let me

721
00:32:48,840 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 1: know if you want any tips on anything. Genuinely, James

722
00:32:51,680 --> 00:32:54,720
Speaker 1: just said a quick yeah, cheers and sort of shuffled

723
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:55,120
Speaker 1: out of it.

724
00:32:55,160 --> 00:32:57,280
Speaker 3: And you can shuffle stories just like this on your

725
00:32:57,280 --> 00:33:00,600
Speaker 3: favorite podcast platforms like Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Worry we listen

726
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:03,800
Speaker 3: to podcasts. Go search up Okay story times for more

727
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:05,000
Speaker 3: stories just like this.

728
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:08,280
Speaker 1: There's another one right there. We just added another one,

729
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:11,320
Speaker 1: and another one, another one. There's a little bit more

730
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:12,640
Speaker 1: to this story.

731
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 2: I don't know.

732
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know what Emma's prerogative is here.

733
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:20,360
Speaker 3: She could be just a fun friend. I think why

734
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 3: I'm like she's after Opie. I don't know why I'm

735
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:23,960
Speaker 3: feeling that way.

736
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,200
Speaker 1: I don't feel that way. I feel like this needs

737
00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,320
Speaker 1: to be a conversation with all three of you, especially

738
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 1: if you want to keep a connection with someone one

739
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 1: that's romantically and a friendship that you really enjoy you.

740
00:33:36,240 --> 00:33:39,280
Speaker 1: I mean, yes, you don't need them to be complete buddy, buddy,

741
00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: but you're like, hey, I'm in the middle of this

742
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:45,280
Speaker 1: and there doesn't need to be any tension. Please get along.

743
00:33:45,320 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 1: It seems like they do from time to time, but

744
00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:51,720
Speaker 1: it's like, you're not fighting over me, like I love

745
00:33:51,760 --> 00:33:54,280
Speaker 1: you both. I love you as a friend, I love

746
00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 1: you as a lover.

747
00:33:55,440 --> 00:33:55,760
Speaker 3: Yeah.

748
00:33:56,120 --> 00:33:58,080
Speaker 1: I think this needs to be a conversation between all

749
00:33:58,120 --> 00:34:00,640
Speaker 1: three of them. Hey, can we actually have a genuine

750
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:01,880
Speaker 1: talk about everything?

751
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 3: Yeah?

752
00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:05,120
Speaker 1: So it doesn't make me feel like a bad person.

753
00:34:05,320 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 3: Yeah so okay, no, sure, true dad.

754
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,040
Speaker 1: Back to the story now I'm writing it down. It

755
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:14,680
Speaker 1: kind of sounds resolved there, but I'm still up to

756
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:17,400
Speaker 1: the point feeling really unsteady. James has been giving me

757
00:34:17,440 --> 00:34:20,000
Speaker 1: the silent treatment since then. I've been trying to discuss

758
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:21,800
Speaker 1: this because I think we need to talk about whatever

759
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:25,520
Speaker 1: is going on here regarding my friendship with Emma. Okay,

760
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 1: wow on that one. This feels so uncharacteristic from him,

761
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:32,399
Speaker 1: and it is all still recent. It's been four days

762
00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:34,560
Speaker 1: since the walk and the air is still not clear.

763
00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:36,560
Speaker 1: Do I need to assert myself that I should be

764
00:34:36,600 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 1: okay for me to have this friendship. I need to

765
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:40,600
Speaker 1: know what the problem is, especially with it being a

766
00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 1: friendship with my queer friend in a queer friend group

767
00:34:43,239 --> 00:34:45,640
Speaker 1: where I am also queer. He's been brushing me off

768
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,520
Speaker 1: and saying things are fine. We do not have proper arguments,

769
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,520
Speaker 1: but I guess that means we've never learned to deal

770
00:34:50,520 --> 00:34:53,000
Speaker 1: with conflict either. With what context I've been able to describe?

771
00:34:53,080 --> 00:34:55,160
Speaker 1: How should I go about bridging this gap when he's

772
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,920
Speaker 1: not acknowledging any of it right now? Sorry, this is

773
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:01,680
Speaker 1: all a mess. I really appreciate any of so, like

774
00:35:01,719 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 1: I said, this needs to be brought up to both parties. Yeah,

775
00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:08,319
Speaker 1: and this needs to you because it also affects you

776
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:11,840
Speaker 1: the most. Yeah, you need to talk to James immediately

777
00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 1: because the cold treatment, the silent treatment. That's not right.

778
00:35:17,040 --> 00:35:19,880
Speaker 1: He's not being very mature about this, the saying it's fine,

779
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:24,360
Speaker 1: it's fine, I'm fine. Obviously you're not fine. Yeah, but

780
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:26,240
Speaker 1: that is the end of that story.

781
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:28,799
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Sam' your og host.

782
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 1: Here.

783
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:30,520
Speaker 2: We're gonna get back to the stories. But here's three

784
00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:32,160
Speaker 2: minutes of ads from our sponsors.

785
00:35:32,400 --> 00:35:35,000
Speaker 3: I thought my boyfriend having a teddy bear was cute,

786
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 3: but now it's disturbing.

787
00:35:36,960 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 1: Just let the man have his teddy bear.

788
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,879
Speaker 3: Okay, now, please, no joke, this is actually serious. I've

789
00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:43,800
Speaker 3: been with my boyfriend for three months.

790
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:44,040
Speaker 2: Now.

791
00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:46,800
Speaker 3: So it's pretty new. So far everything is going well

792
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:50,959
Speaker 3: except this tiny detail. He has this teddy bear. Let's

793
00:35:51,040 --> 00:35:52,040
Speaker 3: name him Teddy.

794
00:35:52,440 --> 00:35:52,720
Speaker 1: Wow.

795
00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 3: Teddy has been always a part of my boyfriend's life.

796
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 3: You got him from his birth or in the age

797
00:35:57,640 --> 00:36:00,920
Speaker 3: of five or six, whatever age is a pro aged

798
00:36:01,120 --> 00:36:04,080
Speaker 3: to remove a teddy bear from a child. His parents

799
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:07,080
Speaker 3: tried taking Teddy away from him. He screamed and cried

800
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 3: so loud without stopping. They ended up giving up, so

801
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:12,279
Speaker 3: he kept Teddy with him his whole life. By the way,

802
00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 3: this comes from Throwaway. I wonder why on the r

803
00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:17,360
Speaker 3: slash Okay story toms ub bred and so. He mentioned

804
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 3: Teddy to me pretty early, about a week after us

805
00:36:19,920 --> 00:36:22,200
Speaker 3: being together, he showed me pictures of him, and I

806
00:36:22,239 --> 00:36:24,560
Speaker 3: find it cute. At first, he had plenty of pictures

807
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:27,440
Speaker 3: of him in different situations, him with the mug, him

808
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 3: laying in bed, him studying. I truly found it adorable

809
00:36:30,280 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 3: since I thought it was just a joke really, and

810
00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:34,719
Speaker 3: I didn't think that Teddy was such a big part

811
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:36,600
Speaker 3: of his life. The more we got to know each other,

812
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:39,600
Speaker 3: the more he started mentioning him. He'd often make jokes

813
00:36:39,600 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 3: about him when he had come back to his flat.

814
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 3: He'd say, I have to come back to Teddy. He

815
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:44,799
Speaker 3: is waiting for me.

816
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:45,799
Speaker 1: Okay, that's a little weird.

817
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 3: And then later he texts me, okay, I'll put Teddy

818
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:50,479
Speaker 3: to bed now, so I might go to sleep as well.

819
00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,400
Speaker 3: I don't want to wake him up again. A little weird,

820
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:57,239
Speaker 3: but still cute. But he really started talking about him constantly,

821
00:36:57,560 --> 00:37:00,319
Speaker 3: always linking what we were doing to him. I wish

822
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:03,800
Speaker 3: Teddy was doing this with us. Teddy doesn't really like people,

823
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:05,880
Speaker 3: so I won't take him with me for this party,

824
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:09,520
Speaker 3: et cetera. He'd send me selfies with him at least

825
00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:12,360
Speaker 3: twice a week. He also sometimes said weird stuff, like

826
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:15,439
Speaker 3: whenever we watched a spicy sleep scene in a movie,

827
00:37:15,560 --> 00:37:18,800
Speaker 3: he said, that's what me and Teddy do when we're alone.

828
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: Okay, I wait, wait.

829
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:23,840
Speaker 3: Wait, wait, wait you well, just here we go. Or

830
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:28,880
Speaker 3: when I asked when he lost his V card, he answered, oh,

831
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:31,480
Speaker 3: I lost it with Teddy a few years ago.

832
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 1: Okay, I take it back.

833
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:37,840
Speaker 3: They were jokes that made me uncomfortable. He always seemed

834
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:41,600
Speaker 3: to consider him as a baby Slash's son, Slash's brother,

835
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 3: so him being spicyalized was extremely weird.

836
00:37:45,600 --> 00:37:45,880
Speaker 2: For me.

837
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 3: I told him that it was weird and he just laughed.

838
00:37:48,920 --> 00:37:52,360
Speaker 3: But I don't think he took me seriously. Okay, about

839
00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:54,600
Speaker 3: a month ago, I told him I was okay with

840
00:37:54,680 --> 00:37:57,480
Speaker 3: him bringing Teddy. When he was staying around my flat,

841
00:37:57,520 --> 00:37:59,200
Speaker 3: I could see he was making him sad to leave

842
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:02,320
Speaker 3: him at home, and also was very curious to finally

843
00:38:02,360 --> 00:38:05,520
Speaker 3: see him in person. I can't go to my boyfriend's flat.

844
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 3: There are rules that are strict. He can't invite anyone.

845
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 3: When he got in the car, he pulled him out

846
00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:13,080
Speaker 3: from his bag and had him give me a kiss

847
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:15,800
Speaker 3: on the cheek. When we drove, he opened the window

848
00:38:15,880 --> 00:38:17,799
Speaker 3: and put Teddy out of the car a bit like

849
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:20,120
Speaker 3: a dog would. He said it was read for Teddy

850
00:38:20,160 --> 00:38:22,840
Speaker 3: to trowl like that, and he could feel that he

851
00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:26,120
Speaker 3: was happy. Teddy smells a lot. My boyfriend has washed

852
00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:27,440
Speaker 3: him in twelve years.

853
00:38:27,640 --> 00:38:28,080
Speaker 1: Oh No.

854
00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:31,080
Speaker 3: For the rest of the car drive, he hugged him,

855
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 3: gave him kisses. He has a weird twitch where he

856
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:38,000
Speaker 3: just compulsively pats the back of Teddy and makes a

857
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 3: weird sound because Teddy used to be able to play music.

858
00:38:40,920 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 3: When he press his belly, he rubs Teddy's clothes in

859
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 3: between his fingers. You can guess that Teddy is in

860
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:50,399
Speaker 3: pretty bad state. He used to be red, but now

861
00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:52,800
Speaker 3: he's just gray. And when we're in bed, he always

862
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:56,319
Speaker 3: puts Teddy's mouth on mine and I always avoid it

863
00:38:56,360 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 3: as I find it disgusting, and I told him that

864
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:01,560
Speaker 3: I hate it, but he does listen. He always tries

865
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:05,680
Speaker 3: to have Teddy touch my breasts or my booty when

866
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:08,560
Speaker 3: we have spicy sleep. I often end up finding him

867
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,480
Speaker 3: in between us, and every time I throw him away,

868
00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:14,840
Speaker 3: my boyfriend says, oh no. He likes to watch in

869
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:20,320
Speaker 3: a joking way. He often mentions us having a party

870
00:39:20,320 --> 00:39:25,640
Speaker 3: of three with Teddy. Now now we already already know

871
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 3: what I think, Like everyone knows.

872
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:31,120
Speaker 2: How I feel about this. Ah, but we could use

873
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:31,480
Speaker 2: this to.

874
00:39:31,800 --> 00:39:35,960
Speaker 3: Our advantage here, No, hear me, How if you really

875
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:37,920
Speaker 3: like this guy and he's the one for you, No,

876
00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:41,200
Speaker 3: you'd be like, hey, how's Teddy feling right now? And

877
00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:43,440
Speaker 3: then whatever Teddy's feeling is actually how he's feeling, and

878
00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:45,120
Speaker 3: it could be like a.

879
00:39:45,680 --> 00:39:48,040
Speaker 1: You gotta burn this. I'm not kidding you got this?

880
00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:51,560
Speaker 1: He seriously, one needs to get rid of that bear.

881
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:57,200
Speaker 1: I'm flip switching here, I'm complete. At first, I thought

882
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:59,000
Speaker 1: it was like, oh, it's really cute, and like, oh,

883
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:01,680
Speaker 1: that's fine, you can have a Teddy bear. No, no, no, no, no, no,

884
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:06,360
Speaker 1: this is not okay. This is like clinical you need help,

885
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:10,520
Speaker 1: because that is that is I'd.

886
00:40:09,719 --> 00:40:13,439
Speaker 3: Say, give him a recommendation to a therapist and walk out.

887
00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 3: I think that's best. But we are not even sure the.

888
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:20,320
Speaker 1: Way done or should should ope be a monster?

889
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:22,439
Speaker 3: No, we don't want to do that because we don't

890
00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:23,120
Speaker 3: know what he would do.

891
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:24,920
Speaker 2: I we don't know.

892
00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 1: I am genuinely scared for op.

893
00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 3: Now this is weird. This is scared leaf leaf Okay,

894
00:40:30,680 --> 00:40:33,480
Speaker 3: Now I'm not an idiot. I know communication is important.

895
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 3: I tried talking to him so many times, sometimes in

896
00:40:36,239 --> 00:40:38,560
Speaker 3: a joking way too, so he doesn't feel attacked. Like

897
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 3: once I asked who he choose if he had to

898
00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:42,880
Speaker 3: choose me and Teddy. He said Teddy, but also so

899
00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:45,080
Speaker 3: many times in a serious way. I told him I

900
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,440
Speaker 3: didn't like it when he was rubbing Teddy on my

901
00:40:47,520 --> 00:40:50,520
Speaker 3: face and body. I told him I found his relationship

902
00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:53,000
Speaker 3: with him way too intense and weird. But every time

903
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:55,800
Speaker 3: he didn't take it seriously, made jokes and never truly

904
00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:57,960
Speaker 3: told me what he thought. I should mention that he

905
00:40:58,040 --> 00:41:00,759
Speaker 3: is like that for any serious conversation. All he does

906
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:03,840
Speaker 3: is make awkward jokes and never tells me how he feels.

907
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 3: He said I love you first because he was wasted.

908
00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 3: This is becoming hard to handle. I have been away

909
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:11,360
Speaker 3: from him for two weeks and kind of relieved I

910
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:14,120
Speaker 3: wouldn't see Teddy anymore. But all he did was send

911
00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:16,920
Speaker 3: pictures and whatever. I asked him, what are you doing

912
00:41:17,320 --> 00:41:20,520
Speaker 3: or what did you do today? His answer was playing

913
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:24,320
Speaker 3: with Teddy today? He told me I was perfect, which

914
00:41:24,600 --> 00:41:27,440
Speaker 3: was at first, and I sure didn't expect that. He

915
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:30,080
Speaker 3: doesn't give me a lot of compliments. When he said that,

916
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:33,600
Speaker 3: I said really, and his reply was actually, no, Teddy

917
00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:36,120
Speaker 3: is perfect. You come way after him? I just gave

918
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:39,879
Speaker 3: up and didn't reply. Now I have three questions. One

919
00:41:40,360 --> 00:41:44,640
Speaker 3: am I overreacting? Am I the one not being tolerant enough?

920
00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:48,560
Speaker 3: Am I some born girlfriend who can't welcome some childishness

921
00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:49,280
Speaker 3: in her couple?

922
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:49,640
Speaker 2: Two?

923
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:51,759
Speaker 3: What should I do? Should I let him live his

924
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 3: life with Teddy? Should I ask him to make a

925
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:56,799
Speaker 3: real choice? Should I ask him to just stop these

926
00:41:56,840 --> 00:42:00,480
Speaker 3: spicy sleep jokes? Like? Who am I to ask saying,

927
00:42:00,760 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 3: I don't know, is it my place to tell him

928
00:42:03,080 --> 00:42:05,680
Speaker 3: to stop being so weird with his Teddy bear? And three,

929
00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:08,520
Speaker 3: how do I get him to finally talk to me

930
00:42:09,000 --> 00:42:12,360
Speaker 3: and take me seriously? We have an update, girl. I

931
00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:17,280
Speaker 3: think another red flag that I saw was his flat,

932
00:42:17,719 --> 00:42:20,000
Speaker 3: Like he has very strict rules and you can't go

933
00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:20,480
Speaker 3: over there.

934
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:21,480
Speaker 1: That's that's yeah.

935
00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:24,360
Speaker 3: I don't know what that's about, but I would probably

936
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,640
Speaker 3: consider that, like maybe he still lives with his parents.

937
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 3: I think this guy might be damaged under the hood

938
00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:29,600
Speaker 3: pretty bad.

939
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:32,280
Speaker 1: Something traumatic must have happened.

940
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:35,520
Speaker 3: And this is not a you know, makeover project that

941
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:38,240
Speaker 3: you should take. I think this should be a therapist.

942
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:43,399
Speaker 1: Job, and like you should obviously care about the guy,

943
00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:46,719
Speaker 1: but this is something that is gonna take a lot

944
00:42:46,760 --> 00:42:49,719
Speaker 1: of time. And this is not like an easy fixer upper.

945
00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:53,680
Speaker 1: It is some deep trauma that needs to be brought up,

946
00:42:53,719 --> 00:42:56,040
Speaker 1: and I feel like he's got a joke about it. No,

947
00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:58,359
Speaker 1: I don't need help, Teddy says, I don't need help.

948
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:02,799
Speaker 1: Teddy doesn't need help. I think you're gonna have to

949
00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:06,040
Speaker 1: talk to his parents or something, because this is a

950
00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:08,880
Speaker 1: serious case of I don't know what's going on.

951
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:12,080
Speaker 3: I don't think parents. I think parents put up with this,

952
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:15,959
Speaker 3: gave up on him in his relationship with Teddy, and well.

953
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:17,279
Speaker 1: I would at least try to talk to his parents

954
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,120
Speaker 1: because they maybe they might know they're rude.

955
00:43:20,600 --> 00:43:23,359
Speaker 3: I believe they are really. I think he still lives

956
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:25,000
Speaker 3: with his parents and he can't she can't go to

957
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:25,799
Speaker 3: his flat because he.

958
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:28,040
Speaker 1: What does he do for work? How did you meet

959
00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 1: this guy? I want to know some details that, like

960
00:43:29,719 --> 00:43:31,879
Speaker 1: where did this come from? But this guy has some

961
00:43:32,040 --> 00:43:36,920
Speaker 1: very like psychotic behavior, like, oh, you can't come to

962
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:39,480
Speaker 1: my flat. I have strict rules. I follow up. I

963
00:43:39,640 --> 00:43:41,960
Speaker 1: do all these weird jokes with this Teddy Bear that

964
00:43:41,960 --> 00:43:44,719
Speaker 1: I haven't watched since I was twelve years old. Let

965
00:43:44,760 --> 00:43:47,520
Speaker 1: me rub him on your face. Also, I've done really

966
00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 1: weird things with Teddy even though he's like a brother

967
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:49,920
Speaker 1: to me.

968
00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:53,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think we're about to get a lot more

969
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:54,440
Speaker 3: answers in this update.

970
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:57,719
Speaker 1: I hope. Yeah. This is this is weird. It's one

971
00:43:57,760 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 1: of the weirdest stories I've ever heard. In my opinion,

972
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 1: out of all the stories I've read, this is the

973
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:03,760
Speaker 1: one that kind.

974
00:44:03,560 --> 00:44:05,399
Speaker 3: Of like top five for sure.

975
00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:08,040
Speaker 1: I'm like squirming and cringing.

976
00:44:07,640 --> 00:44:09,759
Speaker 3: A Lotah first of all, I like to say thank

977
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:12,120
Speaker 3: you to you all. I'm safe for those who are word.

978
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,360
Speaker 3: You're all really scared me though, I had many questions

979
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:17,680
Speaker 3: that were asked, so I'm quickly going to reply to

980
00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:19,600
Speaker 3: the ones I saw most offer him. Why are you

981
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:22,840
Speaker 3: with this guy? Are you insecure? Why are your standard solo?

982
00:44:23,040 --> 00:44:23,520
Speaker 2: Et cetera.

983
00:44:23,680 --> 00:44:27,439
Speaker 3: I obviously didn't write down his niceness description. Apart from

984
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:30,520
Speaker 3: his weird teddy bear fantasy, he was a completely normal

985
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 3: guy with friends, going to parties, studying and so on.

986
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:37,040
Speaker 3: He's quite the popular guy. In fact, even though I

987
00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:39,080
Speaker 3: don't care about this kind of thing, he took me

988
00:44:39,120 --> 00:44:41,359
Speaker 3: on dates and made me feel special. I really thought

989
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:43,799
Speaker 3: he was a keeper. At the beginning. Him being a

990
00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 3: little childish didn't bother me. I myself had stuffed animals,

991
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:50,360
Speaker 3: and even though they're in the cupboard, I used to

992
00:44:50,440 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 3: love them as a kid. That's when he started spicy

993
00:44:53,560 --> 00:44:57,480
Speaker 3: sleeping his bear and involving me in it. That freaked

994
00:44:57,520 --> 00:44:59,960
Speaker 3: me out. The problem is it's hard to tell when

995
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:02,919
Speaker 3: he's joking or not. He constantly makes jokes. That's why

996
00:45:02,960 --> 00:45:05,839
Speaker 3: I could never tell whether I was overreacting or not.

997
00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:09,400
Speaker 3: Is he just joking or does he mean what he says. However,

998
00:45:09,560 --> 00:45:11,919
Speaker 3: one thing I really didn't see coming, and you guys

999
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:14,920
Speaker 3: helped me realize it is lack of respect towards me

1000
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:18,359
Speaker 3: and my boundaries. Sometimes it's easier to see from an

1001
00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:20,640
Speaker 3: external point of view. This whole time, I was too

1002
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:23,319
Speaker 3: focused on wondering whether it was normal or not for

1003
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:26,600
Speaker 3: me to feel uncomfortable. I didn't realize not once did

1004
00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:29,319
Speaker 3: he help me feel comfortable despite me telling him how

1005
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:32,080
Speaker 3: I felt. Thank you all, because that's the one thing

1006
00:45:32,160 --> 00:45:34,680
Speaker 3: you all really helped me for. I would have probably

1007
00:45:34,719 --> 00:45:36,960
Speaker 3: taken more time to realize it on my own, even

1008
00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:39,640
Speaker 3: though it looks obvious about the guy who said he

1009
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 3: knew him. Unfortunately it wasn't him. Thank you so much

1010
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:46,720
Speaker 3: for the help, though, run away. He's going to pass

1011
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 3: you away. He's psychotic. Although this behavior is extremely weird,

1012
00:45:51,200 --> 00:45:54,960
Speaker 3: I don't see him hurting anyone. Yeah, obviously it's easier

1013
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,640
Speaker 3: for me to tell since you all have based your

1014
00:45:57,640 --> 00:46:00,040
Speaker 3: opinion on what I said. He doesn't match this I

1015
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:02,239
Speaker 3: go path personalities at all.

1016
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:03,040
Speaker 1: That's what they all say.

1017
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:05,160
Speaker 3: I'm not allowed to visit him because he lives in

1018
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:07,880
Speaker 3: a private home. A person hosts him in one of

1019
00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:11,160
Speaker 3: their bedrooms, and this person doesn't allow any visit. Is

1020
00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:16,160
Speaker 3: it weirdly strict? Yes, but it's believable. And I've seen

1021
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:19,400
Speaker 3: his sister once, who's confirmed that she couldn't visit him herself.

1022
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 3: One thing is sure, though. Although he may not hurt anyone,

1023
00:46:22,280 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 3: he seems to have a serious problems and I'm not

1024
00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:27,359
Speaker 3: sure if I can handle it. It's fake. It looks

1025
00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:29,920
Speaker 3: like the Ted movie. I know. All looks surreal, but

1026
00:46:29,960 --> 00:46:32,719
Speaker 3: it's true. I have multiple pictures of Teddy if some

1027
00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 3: of you were interested. I know a lot about Teddy's

1028
00:46:35,360 --> 00:46:38,759
Speaker 3: past because my boyfriend won't shut up about him. That's

1029
00:46:38,760 --> 00:46:42,160
Speaker 3: why I knew. I know the movie Ted and I've

1030
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:45,160
Speaker 3: never seen it, but my boyfriend actually suggests that we

1031
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:47,719
Speaker 3: should watch it like a month ago. Burn Teddy, make

1032
00:46:47,760 --> 00:46:51,040
Speaker 3: him disappear, et cetera. Haha, thank you. I did think

1033
00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:53,280
Speaker 3: about that a lot. Often hide him when he brings

1034
00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 3: him to my flat, so I know exactly where he is,

1035
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:58,280
Speaker 3: so my boyfriend doesn't think about him though. He always

1036
00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:00,919
Speaker 3: ends up looking for him though, but still it gives

1037
00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:03,920
Speaker 3: me a break. What did you do? In the end,

1038
00:47:04,239 --> 00:47:06,000
Speaker 3: I was meant to see him today, so I picked

1039
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:07,959
Speaker 3: him up and we drove to my flat. Of course

1040
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,120
Speaker 3: Teddy was there, and when he came in the car,

1041
00:47:10,239 --> 00:47:13,480
Speaker 3: my boyfriend had him give me kisses and stuff. I said, stop, please,

1042
00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:15,319
Speaker 3: in a cold way, and he stopped. I said we

1043
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:18,200
Speaker 3: needed to talk, and he listened because I started crying.

1044
00:47:18,280 --> 00:47:20,520
Speaker 3: I thought it would be hard for me to start talking,

1045
00:47:20,560 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 3: but since I was so stressed with all your comments,

1046
00:47:23,040 --> 00:47:25,719
Speaker 3: I just broke down and cried. I told him how

1047
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,560
Speaker 3: I needed him to stop with Teddy, that he needed

1048
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:31,000
Speaker 3: to stop being so close and dependent on him, and

1049
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:33,319
Speaker 3: Teddy shouldn't come to my flat anymore. I'm just like

1050
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:35,359
Speaker 3: imagining this conversation.

1051
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:37,840
Speaker 1: While he has Teddy in his hand, He's.

1052
00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:40,400
Speaker 3: Like, Teddy shouldn't come to this flat anymore. Teddy is Teddy,

1053
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:40,879
Speaker 3: and then he.

1054
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:43,239
Speaker 1: Puts like the head like Teddy's head down, and he's like,

1055
00:47:43,280 --> 00:47:44,040
Speaker 1: is that how you feel?

1056
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:46,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, just like you're in the car.

1057
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:48,400
Speaker 2: Wow.

1058
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:52,520
Speaker 3: Wow, I'm just just wow.

1059
00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:55,200
Speaker 1: I'm this is this is one of those stories where

1060
00:47:55,200 --> 00:47:57,120
Speaker 1: it's like a complete shock and awe because I get

1061
00:47:57,160 --> 00:47:58,799
Speaker 1: at the beginning, I was like, oh no, he just

1062
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:01,080
Speaker 1: like loves his Teddy and Baron. It's like an emotional bond.

1063
00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:06,520
Speaker 1: This is a basis, oh yeah, this is yeah. I

1064
00:48:06,560 --> 00:48:07,719
Speaker 1: want to see how he responds.

1065
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:10,719
Speaker 3: His response. At first he was silent, but then he

1066
00:48:10,840 --> 00:48:14,000
Speaker 3: said he didn't understand why I was so uncomfortable with it.

1067
00:48:14,239 --> 00:48:17,040
Speaker 3: That is purely joking, that he knew Teddy wasn't real

1068
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:19,520
Speaker 3: and that it was hurting him to see that I

1069
00:48:19,719 --> 00:48:23,120
Speaker 3: thought he had a problem. I was extremely disappointed of

1070
00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 3: this reaction and just told him I needed a break.

1071
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:28,440
Speaker 3: I drove him back to his flat and that's where

1072
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:31,319
Speaker 3: I am now. By the way, if you want to

1073
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:34,239
Speaker 3: listen to more crazy stories just like this, go to

1074
00:48:34,280 --> 00:48:37,239
Speaker 3: your favorite podcast platform, search up Okay story Time and

1075
00:48:37,280 --> 00:48:39,919
Speaker 3: you will get a plethora of stories just like these.

1076
00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:44,080
Speaker 3: But I say, I said, we just finished it out.

1077
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:46,040
Speaker 1: I said, we just finished it out. But I do

1078
00:48:46,080 --> 00:48:47,799
Speaker 1: you just tell him how it is and if he

1079
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:51,359
Speaker 1: can't see straight, like, hey, get help and I'm out

1080
00:48:51,360 --> 00:48:53,600
Speaker 1: of this relationship. It's only three months.

1081
00:48:53,600 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 3: In edit, everyone is saying the post is deleted. I

1082
00:48:56,280 --> 00:48:59,200
Speaker 3: have no idea why wasn't deleted before the original post

1083
00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:01,239
Speaker 3: is available? Thanks, thank you all for your comments. I

1084
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:03,800
Speaker 3: realized there was a confusion. No, I'm not in his flat.

1085
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:06,960
Speaker 3: I'm home safe until I'll sleep out of friends tonight

1086
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:08,879
Speaker 3: and I can talk about it, and I'm never going

1087
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:11,520
Speaker 3: back with him. He sent me terrible messages all night

1088
00:49:11,560 --> 00:49:13,839
Speaker 3: which convinced me to never get back with him. Thank

1089
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:15,680
Speaker 3: you again and have a nice day. I'll send a

1090
00:49:15,719 --> 00:49:18,200
Speaker 3: picture of Teddy for those who want one in a bit,

1091
00:49:18,320 --> 00:49:21,000
Speaker 3: but I have to get ready for school first. Don't worry.

1092
00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:25,080
Speaker 3: The face of my boyfriend won't be sean. I'm breaking

1093
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 3: up with my boyfriend of two years because of a

1094
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:28,800
Speaker 3: TikTok comment.

1095
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:31,920
Speaker 1: Well, it's the good thing TikTok's Oh wait, never mind.

1096
00:49:31,840 --> 00:49:35,080
Speaker 3: I feel so icky. I've we've been together since I

1097
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:37,279
Speaker 3: was sixteen and he was seventeen. My friend sent me

1098
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:39,640
Speaker 3: a link to his TikTok of these two guys talking

1099
00:49:39,640 --> 00:49:42,000
Speaker 3: about how when one of them cheated on his girlfriend,

1100
00:49:42,360 --> 00:49:46,040
Speaker 3: she cheated on him after finding out instead of working

1101
00:49:46,320 --> 00:49:47,799
Speaker 3: to fix the relationship.

1102
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:49,720
Speaker 1: Ah, the good old eye for an eye.

1103
00:49:49,960 --> 00:49:52,200
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from throwaway TikTok comment on

1104
00:49:52,239 --> 00:49:54,360
Speaker 3: the r slash ow okay storytimes I've read it. Demand

1105
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 3: of the video said it was his biggest heartbreak because

1106
00:49:57,280 --> 00:50:00,880
Speaker 3: while his meant nothing to him, she's with one of

1107
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:03,440
Speaker 3: his ex friends. She said she had a crush on

1108
00:50:03,520 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 3: before they got together. The video said it's a woman's

1109
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:09,520
Speaker 3: duty to be nurturing and forgiving in a relationship, and

1110
00:50:09,920 --> 00:50:13,960
Speaker 3: that women have to understand that certain men aren't monogamous.

1111
00:50:14,040 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 3: My friend sent it to me and said, I cannot

1112
00:50:16,600 --> 00:50:19,880
Speaker 3: believe how out of touch these men are. After watching

1113
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:22,560
Speaker 3: the TikTok video, I decided to read the comments. The

1114
00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:26,440
Speaker 3: first one I see is my boyfriend tagging two mutual

1115
00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:31,279
Speaker 3: friends of ours and saying women question mark Christian mark what.

1116
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:34,279
Speaker 3: One of our friends responded to the comment and said

1117
00:50:34,400 --> 00:50:38,959
Speaker 3: females are so dramatic, and my boyfriend responded, agreeing to him.

1118
00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:41,760
Speaker 3: I feel sick. I thought we had the same views

1119
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 3: on things like this. He was raised by a single

1120
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:46,479
Speaker 3: teen mom who worked three jobs to keep a roof

1121
00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 3: over his head, food in his mouth, and allowed him

1122
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:52,720
Speaker 3: to play soccer despite their tight budget and expensive little

1123
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 3: league fees. When we first started dating, I asked him

1124
00:50:56,080 --> 00:50:58,919
Speaker 3: who his role model was, and he said his mom.

1125
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:01,239
Speaker 3: He went on and on how strong and brave she

1126
00:51:01,480 --> 00:51:04,520
Speaker 3: is and how much he appreciates her after all she's

1127
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 3: done for him and was single and living alone at seventeen.

1128
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:11,520
Speaker 3: Because my boyfriend's father cheated on her after she gave

1129
00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:15,200
Speaker 3: birth and was recovering because he can't be expected not

1130
00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:20,240
Speaker 3: to have spicy sleep for eight weeks. I am just upset.

1131
00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:22,360
Speaker 3: I'm at school right now. It's typing this out in

1132
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:25,239
Speaker 3: one of the bathroom stalls because I can't keep this

1133
00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:28,120
Speaker 3: to myself anymore. I'm disgusted with him. He texted me

1134
00:51:28,160 --> 00:51:30,359
Speaker 3: earlier this morning asking if we want to hang out

1135
00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:32,439
Speaker 3: after school, and I said yes. I'm going to break

1136
00:51:32,520 --> 00:51:33,719
Speaker 3: up with him and tell him why.

1137
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:35,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry, you have your reasonings.

1138
00:51:36,280 --> 00:51:39,279
Speaker 3: And to add, he has commented under almost every post

1139
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:42,440
Speaker 3: this account has made, agreeing with all of their misogynistic views.

1140
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:45,680
Speaker 3: He thinks girlfriend slash wives or property of the men

1141
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:48,520
Speaker 3: they're with. Edit too. I'm going to show up at

1142
00:51:48,560 --> 00:51:51,719
Speaker 3: his house and say we're done lmao and leave. I'm

1143
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:54,279
Speaker 3: going to tell him what I saw, and if there's

1144
00:51:54,320 --> 00:51:56,919
Speaker 3: no explanation for it, I DeKay, what the heck kind

1145
00:51:56,920 --> 00:51:59,399
Speaker 3: of justification there is for the crap that he said?

1146
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,440
Speaker 3: But we'll see then I'll break up with him. I'm

1147
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:03,719
Speaker 3: giving them the benefit of the doubt as much as

1148
00:52:03,760 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 3: I can. I don't know why some of y'all think

1149
00:52:06,080 --> 00:52:09,800
Speaker 3: I'm just gonna say we're done with no explanation or discussion.

1150
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,160
Speaker 3: Mini update, y'all. Okay, short amount of time for my

1151
00:52:13,239 --> 00:52:16,480
Speaker 3: last comment. I made my last comment from my car

1152
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:18,759
Speaker 3: and then started driving back home to hopefully try to

1153
00:52:18,800 --> 00:52:21,160
Speaker 3: get my crap together before he gets off work. In

1154
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:23,880
Speaker 3: twenty minutes, his mother called me while I was in

1155
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:26,319
Speaker 3: the car, literally as I'm driving two minutes away from

1156
00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:28,440
Speaker 3: my house. She calls me and asks what sides I

1157
00:52:28,480 --> 00:52:32,160
Speaker 3: want her to make for Thanksgiving? She's a literal angel, WTF?

1158
00:52:32,160 --> 00:52:34,360
Speaker 3: And I tried to keep it together the best I could.

1159
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:36,400
Speaker 3: I guess you could hear that I was upset, and

1160
00:52:36,480 --> 00:52:38,880
Speaker 3: she said, in her mom's voice, what's more, I'm beautiful.

1161
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:42,279
Speaker 3: And I started sobbing, like so bad. I had to

1162
00:52:42,320 --> 00:52:44,719
Speaker 3: pull over at the interests of my neighborhood. And I

1163
00:52:44,800 --> 00:52:47,359
Speaker 3: told her the bare minimum of what I'd seen, as

1164
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:49,960
Speaker 3: much as I could through a crap ton of snot

1165
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:53,200
Speaker 3: and tears, and she was just dead silent for like

1166
00:52:53,280 --> 00:52:56,719
Speaker 3: twenty seconds. And I swear my heart fell out of

1167
00:52:56,760 --> 00:52:57,520
Speaker 3: my butthole.

1168
00:52:57,680 --> 00:52:59,239
Speaker 1: Why did you write that? You could just say?

1169
00:52:59,280 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 3: My heart felt like there's only one hole for it

1170
00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:03,359
Speaker 3: to go out.

1171
00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:05,360
Speaker 1: Keon, you can always throw up your heart.

1172
00:53:06,120 --> 00:53:08,440
Speaker 3: Oh, she didn't want to go there. She said, honey,

1173
00:53:08,520 --> 00:53:10,960
Speaker 3: he's not at work right now, and I dang near past.

1174
00:53:11,719 --> 00:53:14,520
Speaker 3: Get this, y'all. Her best friend owns a bunch of

1175
00:53:14,560 --> 00:53:20,000
Speaker 3: apartment complexes like luxury nice apartment like three point five

1176
00:53:20,080 --> 00:53:24,200
Speaker 3: k a month. Kind this mffort is viewing an apartment

1177
00:53:24,520 --> 00:53:27,080
Speaker 3: to surprise me with when I graduate.

1178
00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 6: Uh.

1179
00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:31,000
Speaker 1: Oh, that breakup don't seem so good now.

1180
00:53:31,280 --> 00:53:32,840
Speaker 3: It's getting a little complicated.

1181
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:36,560
Speaker 1: It's yeah, maybe maybe we slowed the brakes. And just

1182
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:37,879
Speaker 1: so we talk about this.

1183
00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:40,920
Speaker 3: His mom said, her friend offered one of the apartments

1184
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:44,759
Speaker 3: to my boyfriend for dirt cheap, and he's planning to

1185
00:53:44,800 --> 00:53:47,359
Speaker 3: get all the papers signed and surprise me with it

1186
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 3: on Valentine's Day. Since the current tenant, the friend's oldest

1187
00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:54,160
Speaker 3: daughter is moving out to a house with her wife

1188
00:53:54,239 --> 00:53:57,440
Speaker 3: and her release ends February first, his mom's coming over

1189
00:53:57,560 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 3: to look at the screenshots I have. Then she's taken

1190
00:54:00,200 --> 00:54:02,800
Speaker 3: me back to their house to confront him. She's literally

1191
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:04,160
Speaker 3: the sweetest you guys.

1192
00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:04,840
Speaker 1: She said.

1193
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:06,960
Speaker 3: She wanted to be in the house when I talked

1194
00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:10,040
Speaker 3: to him, just in case. Currently sitting right inside the

1195
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:13,000
Speaker 3: front door of my house, taking the eight minutes in

1196
00:54:13,040 --> 00:54:15,600
Speaker 3: between their house and mine to type this out. I

1197
00:54:15,640 --> 00:54:18,200
Speaker 3: am in shock. I'm just waiting for her to pull up,

1198
00:54:18,320 --> 00:54:20,359
Speaker 3: and I'll update as soon as I can. I don't

1199
00:54:20,400 --> 00:54:23,360
Speaker 3: think that I'm sad anymore, just pissed off and confused

1200
00:54:23,400 --> 00:54:24,800
Speaker 3: as how we got an update.

1201
00:54:25,160 --> 00:54:28,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not sad anymore. I'm I'm getting a brand

1202
00:54:28,040 --> 00:54:29,440
Speaker 1: new apartment. Dude.

1203
00:54:29,480 --> 00:54:32,200
Speaker 3: She's like, what, this relationship is really not that serious,

1204
00:54:32,239 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 3: it's just two years whatever, we'll break up and then

1205
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:40,680
Speaker 3: apartment three point five game luxury. Okay, oh my goodness,

1206
00:54:40,880 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 3: we'll get an update.

1207
00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 1: So yeah, see what she says.

1208
00:54:43,680 --> 00:54:46,000
Speaker 3: First things First, I see a lot of people thinking

1209
00:54:46,120 --> 00:54:49,320
Speaker 3: the apartment changes things. It does not. Yeah, my wording

1210
00:54:49,440 --> 00:54:52,040
Speaker 3: was off, and I apologize. When I said I wasn't

1211
00:54:52,080 --> 00:54:55,120
Speaker 3: sad anymore, I meant I no longer was grieving our relationship.

1212
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:57,520
Speaker 3: I was angry at him. The apartment was never going

1213
00:54:57,560 --> 00:54:59,960
Speaker 3: to make me stay with him. Second, also about the apartment,

1214
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:02,640
Speaker 3: it's three point five k for a one bedroom. His

1215
00:55:02,719 --> 00:55:05,560
Speaker 3: mom said he was looking at a three bedroom what

1216
00:55:05,719 --> 00:55:08,399
Speaker 3: would have been our room and then office for each

1217
00:55:08,440 --> 00:55:11,000
Speaker 3: of us. We would have been paying maybe thousand a

1218
00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:15,879
Speaker 3: month for what's usually five point eight K monthly apartment?

1219
00:55:16,360 --> 00:55:17,080
Speaker 1: I take that deal.

1220
00:55:17,520 --> 00:55:20,200
Speaker 3: I would be rethinking this relationship if I heard that,

1221
00:55:20,239 --> 00:55:23,000
Speaker 3: I'd be like, Yo, what three bedroom apartment.

1222
00:55:22,880 --> 00:55:26,279
Speaker 1: And I get my own office for one K?

1223
00:55:26,640 --> 00:55:28,560
Speaker 3: You know, you know I'm gonna be live streaming out

1224
00:55:28,560 --> 00:55:29,520
Speaker 3: of that like crazy.

1225
00:55:30,920 --> 00:55:32,200
Speaker 2: Well, for one K?

1226
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:35,839
Speaker 1: I want to be friends with your mom's friend. What

1227
00:55:35,880 --> 00:55:36,319
Speaker 1: the heck?

1228
00:55:36,440 --> 00:55:39,759
Speaker 3: Me too? I only brought up price because he graduated

1229
00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:42,120
Speaker 3: from high school last year. He's not in college. He

1230
00:55:42,160 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 3: works a good job, though, and I'm still in high school.

1231
00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:47,320
Speaker 3: We spoke briefly about getting an apartment in that complex

1232
00:55:47,360 --> 00:55:49,920
Speaker 3: once we're on our feet financially. I should have included

1233
00:55:49,960 --> 00:55:52,360
Speaker 3: that in our previous post, because while his mom's friend

1234
00:55:52,520 --> 00:55:56,239
Speaker 3: owns cheaper apartments, he was getting the one we both

1235
00:55:56,360 --> 00:56:00,399
Speaker 3: deemed our dream. I don't know what to fill right now.

1236
00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:02,760
Speaker 3: I just can't make sense of anything at the moment,

1237
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:06,080
Speaker 3: So this update might be messy and all over the place. Now,

1238
00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:08,840
Speaker 3: onto the update the talk. I got to his home

1239
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:12,640
Speaker 3: and immediately showed him the screenshots. I asked him what

1240
00:56:12,680 --> 00:56:14,799
Speaker 3: the f they were about and told him I was

1241
00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:17,520
Speaker 3: disgusted with him. I could literally see the color drain

1242
00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:20,800
Speaker 3: from his face on a shocking He started talking really fast,

1243
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:24,560
Speaker 3: and after like forty five seconds of rushed explanation, he

1244
00:56:24,719 --> 00:56:27,279
Speaker 3: just stopped. He stopped talking for a minute or two

1245
00:56:27,440 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 3: and just start stared at the floor. This pissed me

1246
00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:32,120
Speaker 3: off so dang bad. So I got up to leave.

1247
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:34,640
Speaker 3: He grabbed my hand and told me he could explain everything.

1248
00:56:34,760 --> 00:56:36,759
Speaker 3: He handed me his phone and told me to open

1249
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:40,360
Speaker 3: his discord and click on one specific server. Y'all. I

1250
00:56:40,560 --> 00:56:43,239
Speaker 3: just kind of stared at him, like WTF. Anyways, he

1251
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:45,360
Speaker 3: explains to me that one of the two guys he

1252
00:56:45,480 --> 00:56:48,759
Speaker 3: was tagging in these posts was a chauvinist, and him

1253
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:51,960
Speaker 3: and a few other people were gathering evidence to send

1254
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,799
Speaker 3: to the dude's girlfriend. I did not believe him at all.

1255
00:56:55,000 --> 00:56:58,000
Speaker 3: Then the mffort opens his laptop, pulls up one of

1256
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:01,480
Speaker 3: those group Google doc things, and it goes back like

1257
00:57:01,520 --> 00:57:03,440
Speaker 3: a month and a half. Him and some of his

1258
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:05,799
Speaker 3: friends had noticed some weird behavior from the dude and

1259
00:57:05,840 --> 00:57:09,320
Speaker 3: decided to warn his girlfriend. The problem is she's naive,

1260
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:12,400
Speaker 3: and they thought she wouldn't believe him without evidence.

1261
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:13,480
Speaker 1: Girl, I don't know.

1262
00:57:13,560 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 3: I don't believe I didn't just see this Google docter.

1263
00:57:16,320 --> 00:57:20,320
Speaker 1: But also the comments that you he had. He was like,

1264
00:57:20,920 --> 00:57:25,760
Speaker 1: women are like agreed? Was he trying to like entrap

1265
00:57:25,800 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 1: his friend to do that?

1266
00:57:27,240 --> 00:57:29,880
Speaker 3: So technically in that video that we're talking about how

1267
00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:34,240
Speaker 3: women should be forgiving, and I think he was baiting

1268
00:57:34,280 --> 00:57:37,280
Speaker 3: him like women question mark question mark, like asking him

1269
00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:40,040
Speaker 3: like playing dumb, like women, what does he mean by that?

1270
00:57:40,120 --> 00:57:42,400
Speaker 3: And then the guy went into detail like you know, women,

1271
00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:45,520
Speaker 3: should you know that?

1272
00:57:45,760 --> 00:57:49,400
Speaker 1: I mean, he has the evidence. But also if you

1273
00:57:49,400 --> 00:57:53,240
Speaker 1: you think you guys are such deep partners, you would

1274
00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:55,600
Speaker 1: talk about it like he would. You would be like, Okay,

1275
00:57:55,720 --> 00:57:57,120
Speaker 1: well he probably has his reasons.

1276
00:57:57,200 --> 00:57:58,800
Speaker 3: You would probably has his reasons.

1277
00:57:58,640 --> 00:58:01,840
Speaker 1: Like you would get were two men with the girlfriends,

1278
00:58:03,120 --> 00:58:05,360
Speaker 1: you would get a woman's perspective on things like if

1279
00:58:05,360 --> 00:58:08,000
Speaker 1: you're trying to help out another like women, or like

1280
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:10,280
Speaker 1: what's like okay, what's the girl code? Or like how

1281
00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:11,160
Speaker 1: would you go about this?

1282
00:58:11,560 --> 00:58:12,480
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1283
00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:15,800
Speaker 1: But I don't know, I'm still on my my.

1284
00:58:16,280 --> 00:58:17,800
Speaker 3: I mean we got a lot. I feel like he's

1285
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:20,160
Speaker 3: gonna I don't know, Okay, it goes back a month

1286
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:22,560
Speaker 3: and a half of evidence and like their discord server like.

1287
00:58:22,520 --> 00:58:25,439
Speaker 1: That's kind of crazy, and he guess what he didn't

1288
00:58:25,480 --> 00:58:28,120
Speaker 1: have time to like, all right, guys like put like

1289
00:58:28,280 --> 00:58:30,040
Speaker 1: make a Google doc. It was just like, look at

1290
00:58:30,040 --> 00:58:33,000
Speaker 1: my phone, all right, you don't believe me. Where's my laptop?

1291
00:58:33,160 --> 00:58:35,800
Speaker 1: It was like immediate, yeah, you know. He did not

1292
00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:38,280
Speaker 1: have time to think it up and create something else. No,

1293
00:58:39,160 --> 00:58:41,560
Speaker 1: just like I loot if he's just like really elaborate

1294
00:58:41,600 --> 00:58:42,520
Speaker 1: and he's like, I have a backup plan.

1295
00:58:42,840 --> 00:58:44,880
Speaker 3: Get I think this is truth. The doc had links

1296
00:58:44,920 --> 00:58:49,320
Speaker 3: to every TikTok they'd all commented on, screenshots of their comments,

1297
00:58:49,400 --> 00:58:53,240
Speaker 3: and screenshots from the discord, then deciding what TikTok to

1298
00:58:53,320 --> 00:58:56,080
Speaker 3: comment on and what to say the comments he made

1299
00:58:56,480 --> 00:58:59,160
Speaker 3: on the discord server. Someone sent a screenshot of a

1300
00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:03,920
Speaker 3: private message from the guy Dean they were gathering evidence about,

1301
00:59:03,960 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 3: basically saying he didn't trust my boyfriend because my boyfriend

1302
00:59:07,240 --> 00:59:10,560
Speaker 3: never said anything negative about me. So the other mutual

1303
00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:13,200
Speaker 3: let's call him lucas he tagged in the videos, came

1304
00:59:13,280 --> 00:59:15,720
Speaker 3: up with the genius idea that my boyfriend should talk

1305
00:59:15,880 --> 00:59:19,200
Speaker 3: crap about me publicly and call me his b and

1306
00:59:19,240 --> 00:59:23,120
Speaker 3: his property to gain this dude's trust. Literally, WTF what

1307
00:59:23,480 --> 00:59:25,560
Speaker 3: I told my boyfriend that even if this was a

1308
00:59:25,640 --> 00:59:28,800
Speaker 3: setup for this dude, what he said about me was

1309
00:59:28,920 --> 00:59:33,439
Speaker 3: unacceptable and downright effing disgusting. He agreed wholeheartedly and showed

1310
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:35,680
Speaker 3: me the part of the other conversation where my boyfriend

1311
00:59:35,680 --> 00:59:38,760
Speaker 3: refused to say the things Lucas told him to even

1312
00:59:38,800 --> 00:59:41,920
Speaker 3: after Lucas told boyfriend that Dean didn't trust him. My

1313
00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:47,120
Speaker 3: boyfriend's brilliant solution give Lucas' TikTok passwords so Lucas could

1314
00:59:47,120 --> 00:59:50,040
Speaker 3: do it. I saw in the server that boyfriend did

1315
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:53,680
Speaker 3: give Lucas his passwords, and Lucas sins a screenshot of

1316
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:55,960
Speaker 3: the first comment right after he made it.

1317
00:59:56,240 --> 00:59:57,680
Speaker 1: I'm so confusing.

1318
00:59:57,880 --> 01:00:00,560
Speaker 3: I think here's what I think. I I think Lucas

1319
01:00:00,600 --> 01:00:03,600
Speaker 3: wants to get with Dean's girlfriends. So Lucas is like,

1320
01:00:03,720 --> 01:00:05,560
Speaker 3: come on, man, you're the one that has a girlfriend

1321
01:00:05,600 --> 01:00:07,800
Speaker 3: like you gotta you gotta come over here and like,

1322
01:00:07,840 --> 01:00:09,280
Speaker 3: gain this dude, trust.

1323
01:00:09,120 --> 01:00:11,800
Speaker 1: Why then, why are you friends with these people? This

1324
01:00:11,840 --> 01:00:14,720
Speaker 1: is where I might just get away from these dudes high.

1325
01:00:14,560 --> 01:00:16,040
Speaker 3: School who knows, who knows?

1326
01:00:16,120 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, they just graduated high school. And I still that's

1327
01:00:19,160 --> 01:00:23,120
Speaker 1: very odd. And even if you were saying these things

1328
01:00:23,120 --> 01:00:24,800
Speaker 1: on the internet, or having somebody else say these things

1329
01:00:24,800 --> 01:00:27,160
Speaker 1: on the internet. It's like I said earlier, it's gonna

1330
01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:29,720
Speaker 1: stay on the internet. You can't and it makes it's

1331
01:00:29,720 --> 01:00:32,400
Speaker 1: a bad reputation that's already out there for the entire

1332
01:00:32,520 --> 01:00:36,200
Speaker 1: internet to see. If you were doing this, I would

1333
01:00:36,240 --> 01:00:39,680
Speaker 1: have let my partner at least like, Hey, this is

1334
01:00:39,680 --> 01:00:42,760
Speaker 1: the plan. We're gonna trap this guy. You're gonna be

1335
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:43,240
Speaker 1: part of it.

1336
01:00:44,240 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 3: Terrible communication, no communication at all.

1337
01:00:46,520 --> 01:00:52,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, this guy likes hiding things. Obviously, he's like apartment.

1338
01:00:52,400 --> 01:00:54,720
Speaker 3: I think it's a way for the past week and

1339
01:00:54,760 --> 01:00:57,680
Speaker 3: a half. That's when the first comment about me was posted.

1340
01:00:57,840 --> 01:01:00,880
Speaker 3: Lucas had been in boyfriend's ticktok. At this point, boyfriend

1341
01:01:00,960 --> 01:01:02,880
Speaker 3: was in tears and told me he was so sorry

1342
01:01:02,960 --> 01:01:05,480
Speaker 3: and he would leave the discord, block Lucas and never

1343
01:01:05,520 --> 01:01:08,360
Speaker 3: talk to him again. He said he deleted his TikTok

1344
01:01:08,680 --> 01:01:11,360
Speaker 3: and set up parental settings on his phone to ensure

1345
01:01:11,400 --> 01:01:13,680
Speaker 3: he doesn't download it again. I said no to everything

1346
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:16,760
Speaker 3: except him leaving the discord and not participating in the

1347
01:01:16,800 --> 01:01:19,520
Speaker 3: dock anymore, telling him I know about the apartment. In

1348
01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:22,760
Speaker 3: the aftermath, I basically just told him I know, and

1349
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:25,240
Speaker 3: due to all this, I won't be moving in with him.

1350
01:01:25,320 --> 01:01:28,440
Speaker 3: Whoa He was upset that the surprise was ruined for me,

1351
01:01:28,680 --> 01:01:31,680
Speaker 3: but he said he understands. He told me that he

1352
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:35,640
Speaker 3: respects my wishes and wouldn't move forward with getting the apartment.

1353
01:01:35,720 --> 01:01:38,360
Speaker 3: He brought up couple's therapy and said that he would

1354
01:01:38,360 --> 01:01:41,240
Speaker 3: go to individual therapy as well. He also offered to

1355
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:43,920
Speaker 3: message Lucas and tell him off. In his notesap there

1356
01:01:43,920 --> 01:01:47,440
Speaker 3: are like three paragraphs already written. Apparently after one comment

1357
01:01:47,520 --> 01:01:50,760
Speaker 3: Lucas made about cheating on me with boyfriend was trying

1358
01:01:50,760 --> 01:01:52,680
Speaker 3: to find a way to end whatever it was what

1359
01:01:52,720 --> 01:01:55,040
Speaker 3: they were doing. I told him I would go to

1360
01:01:55,120 --> 01:01:59,600
Speaker 3: couples therapy if and only if he one did individual

1361
01:01:59,600 --> 01:02:02,760
Speaker 3: therapy for a month or a bit more weekly appointments

1362
01:02:02,960 --> 01:02:05,320
Speaker 3: and when his therapist suggests I com in for a session,

1363
01:02:05,840 --> 01:02:09,040
Speaker 3: I will go Two messages Lucas in front of me

1364
01:02:09,360 --> 01:02:12,080
Speaker 3: and three never pulls any crap like this again, I

1365
01:02:12,080 --> 01:02:14,600
Speaker 3: feel like, still get the apartment because that's one hell

1366
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:15,080
Speaker 3: of a deal.

1367
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:17,480
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, but.

1368
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:20,800
Speaker 3: Don't move them with them right away for you not ready,

1369
01:02:22,320 --> 01:02:24,160
Speaker 3: and go to couple therapy. That's what I think.

1370
01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:27,560
Speaker 1: It seems like Op wants to maintain the relationship if

1371
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:33,480
Speaker 1: he abides by these rules. I mean the yeah, I

1372
01:02:33,480 --> 01:02:36,760
Speaker 1: mean the fact that he immediately again was just like,

1373
01:02:37,360 --> 01:02:41,080
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. I'm gonna get out of this right now. Therapy,

1374
01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:44,200
Speaker 1: couples therapy. But like I said, man, the things on

1375
01:02:44,240 --> 01:02:46,760
Speaker 1: the internet, they're out there for everyone to see, even

1376
01:02:46,760 --> 01:02:48,880
Speaker 1: though you didn't really say it, and you had Lucas

1377
01:02:48,880 --> 01:02:53,400
Speaker 1: say it for you. Not Okay, this is a this

1378
01:02:53,480 --> 01:02:55,919
Speaker 1: is one of those you're walking on like a tight

1379
01:02:56,000 --> 01:02:59,400
Speaker 1: rope kind of thing. See how it goes, and you

1380
01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:01,440
Speaker 1: just gotta if you really want to put in the effort,

1381
01:03:01,720 --> 01:03:04,080
Speaker 1: which I see, it's it seems like Opie does want

1382
01:03:04,120 --> 01:03:07,800
Speaker 1: to do Yeah, he's like Opie's trying to give him.

1383
01:03:08,160 --> 01:03:11,760
Speaker 1: I guess one more chance, but I don't know.

1384
01:03:11,960 --> 01:03:14,400
Speaker 3: We'll see. I did say that maybe it's not best

1385
01:03:14,440 --> 01:03:17,240
Speaker 3: we be together in between now and how he feels

1386
01:03:17,400 --> 01:03:20,600
Speaker 3: as though he's had enough individual therapy to be ready

1387
01:03:20,640 --> 01:03:23,800
Speaker 3: for the couple's therapy. He got very emotional and said

1388
01:03:23,840 --> 01:03:26,920
Speaker 3: while he understands and respects what I want, he loves

1389
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:29,520
Speaker 3: me and doesn't want us to end. He told me

1390
01:03:29,680 --> 01:03:32,160
Speaker 3: to take all the space I need, asked me not

1391
01:03:32,320 --> 01:03:34,680
Speaker 3: to count this as a breakup. He said he still

1392
01:03:34,720 --> 01:03:37,840
Speaker 3: wanted to be able to call himself my boyfriend. I'm

1393
01:03:37,840 --> 01:03:41,200
Speaker 3: pissed his f at him, but the way he phrased

1394
01:03:41,240 --> 01:03:45,160
Speaker 3: that it was cute. I told him, Okay, no breakup,

1395
01:03:45,480 --> 01:03:48,040
Speaker 3: but definitely a break. Ground rules for the break. He

1396
01:03:48,120 --> 01:03:51,320
Speaker 3: brought ground rules up first. He told me that they

1397
01:03:51,320 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 3: don't have to be for me, but he wants to

1398
01:03:53,840 --> 01:03:56,640
Speaker 3: show me that he's sorry and prove that he doesn't

1399
01:03:56,640 --> 01:03:59,800
Speaker 3: agree at all with what Lucas did. This was his solution.

1400
01:04:00,120 --> 01:04:02,480
Speaker 3: Give me rules to follow, and I will every day

1401
01:04:02,560 --> 01:04:03,760
Speaker 3: until I made this up to you.

1402
01:04:04,080 --> 01:04:07,440
Speaker 1: I don't know now. It's like an ultimatum, and ultimatums

1403
01:04:07,440 --> 01:04:08,120
Speaker 1: are not great.

1404
01:04:08,840 --> 01:04:12,280
Speaker 3: Yeah. Number one, no contact with Dean. Two this is

1405
01:04:12,320 --> 01:04:16,880
Speaker 3: not rass slash Rachel situation. No dating, flirting, sleeping with

1406
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:17,720
Speaker 3: anyone else.

1407
01:04:17,800 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 1: On a break.

1408
01:04:18,560 --> 01:04:22,760
Speaker 3: Three he apologized to his dang mother for texting is okay,

1409
01:04:23,240 --> 01:04:26,400
Speaker 3: but not like we did before this. No texting multiple

1410
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:29,840
Speaker 3: times an hour, no just talking checking in good morning,

1411
01:04:29,880 --> 01:04:32,280
Speaker 3: good night texts are okay. He came up with one, two,

1412
01:04:32,320 --> 01:04:34,680
Speaker 3: and four. I told him to apologize to his mom

1413
01:04:34,720 --> 01:04:38,000
Speaker 3: for almost making her pop a blood vessel in the

1414
01:04:38,080 --> 01:04:39,200
Speaker 3: Dairy Queen parking lot.

1415
01:04:39,320 --> 01:04:39,880
Speaker 1: That's good on you.

1416
01:04:40,440 --> 01:04:43,320
Speaker 3: Lucas. He texted Lucas in front of me, basically just

1417
01:04:43,400 --> 01:04:46,080
Speaker 3: copy and pasted the message he already planned on sending,

1418
01:04:46,160 --> 01:04:48,040
Speaker 3: and he added some things. That gist of it is,

1419
01:04:48,080 --> 01:04:50,040
Speaker 3: I can't believe I went along with this. I can't

1420
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:52,640
Speaker 3: believe I let you say that crap about my girlfriend.

1421
01:04:52,720 --> 01:04:54,919
Speaker 3: Why the F do you even think of her that way?

1422
01:04:55,040 --> 01:04:57,240
Speaker 3: Don't ever talk to either of us again. Then he

1423
01:04:57,320 --> 01:04:59,880
Speaker 3: blocked him. He blocked Dean as well, not before calling

1424
01:05:00,080 --> 01:05:02,840
Speaker 3: him out and sending him the dock link to him

1425
01:05:02,880 --> 01:05:07,040
Speaker 3: and Dean's girlfriend. My request Loo the Kraken boyfriend's mom.

1426
01:05:07,120 --> 01:05:10,160
Speaker 3: They're talking right now. She's pissed. She was in the

1427
01:05:10,680 --> 01:05:12,680
Speaker 3: room next to the one we were in, so she

1428
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:15,320
Speaker 3: heard most of what was said. He's showing her the

1429
01:05:15,320 --> 01:05:18,040
Speaker 3: screenshots of the discord and the messages he sent Dean

1430
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:20,240
Speaker 3: and Lucas when we first got there. I had to

1431
01:05:20,280 --> 01:05:22,160
Speaker 3: convince her to let me talk to him first. She

1432
01:05:22,280 --> 01:05:24,480
Speaker 3: was going to beat his butt LAO. I saw some

1433
01:05:24,520 --> 01:05:27,680
Speaker 3: comments briefly about it being weird that she wanted to

1434
01:05:27,680 --> 01:05:30,320
Speaker 3: be in the house just in case. So let me explain.

1435
01:05:30,400 --> 01:05:34,640
Speaker 3: Boyfriend's father was abusive. That was a short story. The

1436
01:05:34,720 --> 01:05:37,120
Speaker 3: long story short is that he said a lot of

1437
01:05:37,120 --> 01:05:39,840
Speaker 3: the things that were in the screenshots, and when she

1438
01:05:39,920 --> 01:05:43,760
Speaker 3: would talk to him about it, he would abuse her.

1439
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:47,000
Speaker 3: My boyfriend has never been violent with me or anyone.

1440
01:05:47,400 --> 01:05:50,120
Speaker 3: Mama beartt was just applying her past to the present

1441
01:05:50,240 --> 01:05:52,600
Speaker 3: situation because she didn't want me to go through what

1442
01:05:52,680 --> 01:05:55,280
Speaker 3: she did. By the way, you can join us on

1443
01:05:55,320 --> 01:05:58,240
Speaker 3: your favorite podcast platform if you like to hear stories

1444
01:05:58,240 --> 01:06:01,320
Speaker 3: that are crazy just like this. Just search up Okay

1445
01:06:01,360 --> 01:06:05,240
Speaker 3: Storytime on Apple, Spotify, wherever you listen to podcasts. Check

1446
01:06:05,280 --> 01:06:07,600
Speaker 3: it out. Yeah, I think the boy the mother was

1447
01:06:07,680 --> 01:06:09,560
Speaker 3: just being supportive, was being saved.

1448
01:06:09,640 --> 01:06:12,320
Speaker 1: No, the mom, well, the mom wanted to be there

1449
01:06:12,360 --> 01:06:17,440
Speaker 1: because she can't believe what one her son did to

1450
01:06:18,240 --> 01:06:22,000
Speaker 1: ope and how he's saying all of this stuff, especially

1451
01:06:22,000 --> 01:06:25,240
Speaker 1: what he's been through and what she's been through, especially

1452
01:06:25,280 --> 01:06:27,959
Speaker 1: when he's like, my biggest role model is my mom

1453
01:06:28,760 --> 01:06:30,400
Speaker 1: because she's a singing she was a single mother and

1454
01:06:30,400 --> 01:06:35,280
Speaker 1: she raised me through helen back and she's like a supermom,

1455
01:06:35,400 --> 01:06:38,360
Speaker 1: So she wants to make sure that's hammered in as

1456
01:06:38,360 --> 01:06:43,000
Speaker 1: well of one what are you doing? What do you

1457
01:06:43,040 --> 01:06:46,080
Speaker 1: believe in? So I think the mom was just being

1458
01:06:46,080 --> 01:06:50,560
Speaker 1: there to make sure everything, even if it wasn't for Op,

1459
01:06:50,880 --> 01:06:53,720
Speaker 1: which it was definitely. She was there for Op. He

1460
01:06:53,800 --> 01:06:57,360
Speaker 1: was there for her and her son's benefit. So like

1461
01:06:57,440 --> 01:06:58,840
Speaker 1: she said, mama bearing, so.

1462
01:06:59,080 --> 01:07:02,840
Speaker 3: Mama bearing for Jerseys. Boyfriend said that he wanted me

1463
01:07:02,960 --> 01:07:05,600
Speaker 3: there for Thanksgiving. He said he'd be in his room

1464
01:07:05,640 --> 01:07:07,680
Speaker 3: the whole time so I could spend the holiday with

1465
01:07:07,760 --> 01:07:10,120
Speaker 3: his mom and her friends. Oh, come on, I said, no,

1466
01:07:10,440 --> 01:07:12,640
Speaker 3: he should be able to spend the holiday with his family.

1467
01:07:13,240 --> 01:07:15,760
Speaker 3: He asked me if i'd come for his mom. I said,

1468
01:07:15,760 --> 01:07:18,040
Speaker 3: I'll think about it. I think that's everything. I don't

1469
01:07:18,080 --> 01:07:20,720
Speaker 3: know how I feel right now. I'm tired of neverwhelmed.

1470
01:07:21,040 --> 01:07:23,920
Speaker 3: I'll be going to individual therapy as well. I'm waiting

1471
01:07:23,960 --> 01:07:26,640
Speaker 3: until a boyfriend and his mom get done talking so

1472
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:29,480
Speaker 3: she can take me home and I'll probably sleep for

1473
01:07:29,480 --> 01:07:32,800
Speaker 3: twelve hours. Thank you for the support. Everything today happened

1474
01:07:32,880 --> 01:07:36,360
Speaker 3: so fast. My head is spinning. These past five hours

1475
01:07:36,360 --> 01:07:37,320
Speaker 3: felt like fifty.

1476
01:07:38,440 --> 01:07:40,080
Speaker 2: Hey it's John here. We're gonna get back to the stories.

1477
01:07:40,120 --> 01:07:42,120
Speaker 3: Put a quick three minute ad break from our sponsors

1478
01:07:42,120 --> 01:07:43,000
Speaker 3: that keep the show going.

1479
01:07:43,840 --> 01:07:46,720
Speaker 4: My aunt demands I give up my baby to my

1480
01:07:46,920 --> 01:07:48,040
Speaker 4: infertile cousin.

1481
01:07:48,560 --> 01:07:52,240
Speaker 2: I said no, that's not your baby, jee, That's not

1482
01:07:52,240 --> 01:07:52,920
Speaker 2: how that works.

1483
01:07:53,080 --> 01:07:53,280
Speaker 1: No.

1484
01:07:53,760 --> 01:07:54,840
Speaker 2: I twenty four female.

1485
01:07:54,880 --> 01:07:57,120
Speaker 4: I'm currently eight months pregnant with the baby girl, and

1486
01:07:57,160 --> 01:07:59,680
Speaker 4: my aunt slash cousin have been giving me trouble since

1487
01:07:59,720 --> 01:08:02,520
Speaker 4: I the news. My partner and I already adore our

1488
01:08:02,560 --> 01:08:04,200
Speaker 4: girl and have no plans to give her up, but

1489
01:08:04,240 --> 01:08:07,000
Speaker 4: my aunt wants me to give up my child to

1490
01:08:07,080 --> 01:08:10,600
Speaker 4: my cousin, who has been suffering with fertility for the

1491
01:08:10,640 --> 01:08:11,920
Speaker 4: past five years.

1492
01:08:12,160 --> 01:08:15,720
Speaker 2: Ooh, dangay, I mean that's really hard. Does it mean

1493
01:08:15,720 --> 01:08:16,880
Speaker 2: that she deserves your baby?

1494
01:08:16,960 --> 01:08:17,120
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1495
01:08:17,240 --> 01:08:17,400
Speaker 6: Right?

1496
01:08:17,479 --> 01:08:18,240
Speaker 2: Based on the title.

1497
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:22,040
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from it's everle there on

1498
01:08:22,360 --> 01:08:25,679
Speaker 4: the Okay storytime sepreddit, so for more context. My aunt

1499
01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:28,759
Speaker 4: has raised my sister and I as a motherly figure

1500
01:08:29,040 --> 01:08:31,280
Speaker 4: after our mother passed away when we were very young.

1501
01:08:31,400 --> 01:08:33,519
Speaker 4: We have been quite close with our aunt slash cousin

1502
01:08:33,640 --> 01:08:36,200
Speaker 4: throughout our life and have been trying to support my

1503
01:08:36,240 --> 01:08:39,200
Speaker 4: cousin through her struggles with infertility. My aunt is also

1504
01:08:39,360 --> 01:08:42,280
Speaker 4: very religious, being a Mormon who regularly attends church and

1505
01:08:42,320 --> 01:08:45,000
Speaker 4: has a very rigid, closed minded view on mortality and

1506
01:08:45,080 --> 01:08:48,360
Speaker 4: values and living a good life. She believes that a

1507
01:08:48,439 --> 01:08:52,040
Speaker 4: child deserves a strong foundational religious upbringing with a strong

1508
01:08:52,400 --> 01:08:56,240
Speaker 4: providing father and a loving, attentive mother. Since my partner

1509
01:08:56,280 --> 01:08:58,720
Speaker 4: is not Christian, and because we both have full time

1510
01:08:58,800 --> 01:09:00,400
Speaker 4: jobs and careers, she believed that.

1511
01:09:00,360 --> 01:09:03,679
Speaker 2: My child will grow up confused and misguided.

1512
01:09:03,080 --> 01:09:05,640
Speaker 4: In our household due to our religious differences, lacking a

1513
01:09:05,680 --> 01:09:08,960
Speaker 4: proper sense of identity and adequate care. She says she

1514
01:09:09,080 --> 01:09:11,599
Speaker 4: fears that our child's well being will not be put

1515
01:09:11,680 --> 01:09:14,040
Speaker 4: first in such an environment and that our kid could

1516
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:15,120
Speaker 4: likely go down a.

1517
01:09:15,160 --> 01:09:16,479
Speaker 2: Dark, immoral path.

1518
01:09:16,840 --> 01:09:19,559
Speaker 4: According to her, my cousin, who works part time from home,

1519
01:09:19,600 --> 01:09:22,400
Speaker 4: and her husband are way better able to provide my

1520
01:09:22,520 --> 01:09:24,960
Speaker 4: child with a loving home with good values and religion.

1521
01:09:25,080 --> 01:09:27,400
Speaker 4: I have both my aunt and cousin blocked on most

1522
01:09:27,560 --> 01:09:30,040
Speaker 4: forms of communication, and I have moved to a new

1523
01:09:30,040 --> 01:09:32,559
Speaker 4: home where they do not know the address. My partner

1524
01:09:32,560 --> 01:09:34,840
Speaker 4: and I also got married in a private ceremony so

1525
01:09:34,880 --> 01:09:37,280
Speaker 4: that they wouldn't have control over my medical decisions.

1526
01:09:37,320 --> 01:09:39,160
Speaker 2: Out of the two, my aunt husband.

1527
01:09:38,800 --> 01:09:41,600
Speaker 4: More aggressively towards me and even showed up to my

1528
01:09:41,640 --> 01:09:44,000
Speaker 4: old apartment one day to scream and argue with me

1529
01:09:44,200 --> 01:09:45,080
Speaker 4: about the situation.

1530
01:09:45,280 --> 01:09:47,120
Speaker 2: Wo why why?

1531
01:09:47,439 --> 01:09:50,080
Speaker 4: She in a fake nice tone, tried to get me

1532
01:09:50,120 --> 01:09:52,200
Speaker 4: to come with her to a cafe near the church

1533
01:09:52,400 --> 01:09:54,360
Speaker 4: to speak with me about the baby, even when I

1534
01:09:54,400 --> 01:09:56,320
Speaker 4: told her there's nothing to be discussed and then I'm

1535
01:09:56,400 --> 01:09:57,200
Speaker 4: keeping the baby.

1536
01:09:57,280 --> 01:09:58,720
Speaker 2: I spoke with the apartment.

1537
01:09:58,360 --> 01:10:00,840
Speaker 4: Manager and had to hide until she she left after

1538
01:10:01,000 --> 01:10:04,000
Speaker 4: half an hour. My aunt also has her church friends

1539
01:10:04,000 --> 01:10:06,919
Speaker 4: after me. Oh boy, my god, they set.

1540
01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:08,000
Speaker 2: The whole tad on you, right.

1541
01:10:08,439 --> 01:10:12,520
Speaker 4: They sometimes regularly send me hostiles text messages and coy smails.

1542
01:10:12,640 --> 01:10:14,920
Speaker 4: My cousin has been on the quieter side towards me,

1543
01:10:15,080 --> 01:10:17,439
Speaker 4: and has been struggling with depression and trauma from her

1544
01:10:17,479 --> 01:10:20,120
Speaker 4: latest pregnancy last year, ending in a still birth of

1545
01:10:20,120 --> 01:10:23,160
Speaker 4: her baby after pre term labor at thirty weeks.

1546
01:10:23,439 --> 01:10:26,679
Speaker 2: Oh that's I mean, like this is so hard, because

1547
01:10:26,720 --> 01:10:31,120
Speaker 2: like this person is going through something really really difficult, right,

1548
01:10:31,320 --> 01:10:36,000
Speaker 2: and everyone's making it about like, you know, silly, stupid things.

1549
01:10:36,040 --> 01:10:38,559
Speaker 4: She has been regularly posting on social media and has

1550
01:10:38,640 --> 01:10:41,960
Speaker 4: joined motherhood related groups. I've heard through the gossip that

1551
01:10:42,040 --> 01:10:44,000
Speaker 4: she's trying to get a baby through those groups and

1552
01:10:44,040 --> 01:10:46,600
Speaker 4: has been banned from a considerable amount of them. To

1553
01:10:46,760 --> 01:10:50,040
Speaker 4: her dismay, she had been harassing young moms and widows

1554
01:10:50,040 --> 01:10:51,400
Speaker 4: for their babies oh.

1555
01:10:53,160 --> 01:10:57,160
Speaker 2: Oh, whoa, what the heck? You are also not a

1556
01:10:57,200 --> 01:10:58,640
Speaker 2: good person, it's saying, insane.

1557
01:10:58,760 --> 01:11:02,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, my cousin is desperate for a baby to fix

1558
01:11:02,200 --> 01:11:06,120
Speaker 4: her family and is apparently waiting for my name to

1559
01:11:06,200 --> 01:11:09,599
Speaker 4: give birth. She from my baby girl, who she apparently

1560
01:11:09,640 --> 01:11:11,360
Speaker 4: sees is her own late baby in.

1561
01:11:11,560 --> 01:11:15,360
Speaker 2: She needs massive amounts of therapy. Yes, this is clearly

1562
01:11:15,400 --> 01:11:18,720
Speaker 2: like a psychotic break much bigger issues. This is like,

1563
01:11:18,800 --> 01:11:20,880
Speaker 2: this is the loss of you're going through loss of

1564
01:11:20,920 --> 01:11:25,680
Speaker 2: your child, and your mind is filling in with like

1565
01:11:26,000 --> 01:11:30,759
Speaker 2: he's replacing it like the baby wherever it can. Yeah,

1566
01:11:30,800 --> 01:11:33,360
Speaker 2: and this is just not Yeah, this is therapy need

1567
01:11:33,520 --> 01:11:35,800
Speaker 2: like very very much.

1568
01:11:36,520 --> 01:11:38,920
Speaker 4: My aunt and her are apparently sure that I will

1569
01:11:38,960 --> 01:11:42,480
Speaker 4: be overwhelmed with my decision and the responsibilities with motherhood,

1570
01:11:42,720 --> 01:11:45,720
Speaker 4: that I will give up slash give more to my

1571
01:11:45,880 --> 01:11:49,439
Speaker 4: baby by letting my cousin and her husband adopt her.

1572
01:11:49,680 --> 01:11:55,800
Speaker 2: This is insane. I really quick cannot imagine. I just

1573
01:11:55,840 --> 01:12:00,280
Speaker 2: can't understand the aunt and the husband entertaining the these

1574
01:12:00,360 --> 01:12:06,640
Speaker 2: thoughts of a clearly just devastated woman just clearly like

1575
01:12:06,760 --> 01:12:11,600
Speaker 2: having a mental breakdown, right, and they're just letting it.

1576
01:12:11,640 --> 01:12:13,160
Speaker 2: They're just like encouraging it.

1577
01:12:13,280 --> 01:12:15,479
Speaker 4: My aunt says that giving my baby to my cousin

1578
01:12:15,520 --> 01:12:17,920
Speaker 4: it shouldn't be as hard as it could because we

1579
01:12:17,960 --> 01:12:20,840
Speaker 4: are family and I could have a baby later on

1580
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:24,360
Speaker 4: as I'm still young and have plans to attend grad school.

1581
01:12:24,080 --> 01:12:28,639
Speaker 2: After working for a while. This justification is just like okay, sure,

1582
01:12:28,640 --> 01:12:31,519
Speaker 2: but like it's a crazy baby. These are crazy people.

1583
01:12:31,680 --> 01:12:34,280
Speaker 4: Yes, you get an attachment to your baby when it's

1584
01:12:34,360 --> 01:12:36,880
Speaker 4: inside of you growing, and you don't want to just

1585
01:12:36,880 --> 01:12:38,400
Speaker 4: give that up just because like, oh yeah, I can

1586
01:12:38,439 --> 01:12:39,120
Speaker 4: just have another one.

1587
01:12:39,240 --> 01:12:41,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just like I gotta make the decision of

1588
01:12:41,720 --> 01:12:43,960
Speaker 2: course to give up their baby, and that is a

1589
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:47,000
Speaker 2: personal decision right that no one else can say, hey,

1590
01:12:47,040 --> 01:12:48,960
Speaker 2: just do it. This is like other ringing out the

1591
01:12:48,960 --> 01:12:50,679
Speaker 2: stories where people are like, just give me the money

1592
01:12:50,680 --> 01:12:53,320
Speaker 2: you have extra exactly. And if you can't just.

1593
01:12:53,240 --> 01:12:55,000
Speaker 6: Say give me a baby, you can have another, you

1594
01:12:55,200 --> 01:12:57,599
Speaker 6: have another because then too, like you go through so

1595
01:12:57,720 --> 01:13:00,080
Speaker 6: much when you're pregnant, yes, and you can't like that

1596
01:13:00,200 --> 01:13:03,600
Speaker 6: it's something that you have pregnancy with like beforehand, be

1597
01:13:03,640 --> 01:13:04,960
Speaker 6: like a surrogate or something like that.

1598
01:13:05,080 --> 01:13:08,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, there is a whole big process about sergucy. Yes,

1599
01:13:08,120 --> 01:13:09,639
Speaker 2: you can't just be like, hey, you went had a baby.

1600
01:13:09,680 --> 01:13:12,559
Speaker 2: I'll take it right too. Right. This is not like

1601
01:13:12,600 --> 01:13:16,439
Speaker 2: a Rumpels stilt skin situation exactly. I just have her

1602
01:13:16,479 --> 01:13:17,040
Speaker 2: first born.

1603
01:13:17,520 --> 01:13:20,439
Speaker 4: My cousin also apparently wants to get into contact as

1604
01:13:20,439 --> 01:13:22,559
Speaker 4: we had before my pregnancy. I will not be speaking

1605
01:13:22,560 --> 01:13:25,080
Speaker 4: to her again until after I give birth, to see

1606
01:13:25,240 --> 01:13:28,880
Speaker 4: where she is then to prevent further stress during my pregnancy.

1607
01:13:28,960 --> 01:13:31,680
Speaker 4: I have been very supportive of her through her infertrinity

1608
01:13:31,840 --> 01:13:34,640
Speaker 4: journey and generally liked her more than my aunt growing up.

1609
01:13:34,680 --> 01:13:37,840
Speaker 4: But her behavior and thinking have shocked me and are

1610
01:13:37,880 --> 01:13:40,519
Speaker 4: making me fear for my safety. I am planning a

1611
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:42,760
Speaker 4: big wedding party for next year since my partner and

1612
01:13:42,800 --> 01:13:45,360
Speaker 4: I privately got married this year, and I am not

1613
01:13:45,400 --> 01:13:46,879
Speaker 4: sure if my cousin or aunt.

1614
01:13:46,760 --> 01:13:50,320
Speaker 2: Would be invited or able to come. Don't invite them, yeah,

1615
01:13:50,320 --> 01:13:52,679
Speaker 2: I would not want to invite these people to anything,

1616
01:13:53,080 --> 01:13:53,800
Speaker 2: leave them mad of it.

1617
01:13:53,840 --> 01:13:55,960
Speaker 4: I have a lot of family support from both sides

1618
01:13:56,040 --> 01:13:58,080
Speaker 4: right now, apart from those who are close to them

1619
01:13:58,120 --> 01:14:00,720
Speaker 4: and on their side, but I am not sure if

1620
01:14:00,720 --> 01:14:02,720
Speaker 4: that support will be as strong in a year, and

1621
01:14:02,840 --> 01:14:05,479
Speaker 4: what my relationship with my aunt or cousin will be then.

1622
01:14:05,760 --> 01:14:08,240
Speaker 4: I have skipped some family events that I know they

1623
01:14:08,280 --> 01:14:10,240
Speaker 4: will be at, but I don't want to miss out

1624
01:14:10,240 --> 01:14:12,920
Speaker 4: on those family gatherings and fun forever. I'm not sure

1625
01:14:12,960 --> 01:14:14,880
Speaker 4: how the future will look like with my aunt and

1626
01:14:14,960 --> 01:14:18,160
Speaker 4: cousin after my baby and the issues that arise with that.

1627
01:14:18,439 --> 01:14:22,000
Speaker 2: Any support would be appreciated. And there is an update.

1628
01:14:22,120 --> 01:14:25,320
Speaker 2: Wooo should we just jump right and just jump in,

1629
01:14:25,520 --> 01:14:29,639
Speaker 2: just do it? Update? This will be a small update.

1630
01:14:29,920 --> 01:14:32,280
Speaker 4: We got in contact with the local church leader and

1631
01:14:32,320 --> 01:14:34,639
Speaker 4: talk to them about the situation with my aunt and cousin,

1632
01:14:34,680 --> 01:14:37,080
Speaker 4: who are both active members. We talked to him for

1633
01:14:37,120 --> 01:14:40,360
Speaker 4: a while. He initially dismissed my concerns as personal conflict

1634
01:14:40,360 --> 01:14:43,360
Speaker 4: between family and tried to refer us over to counseling services.

1635
01:14:43,400 --> 01:14:45,320
Speaker 4: We explained to him that my cousin is dealing with

1636
01:14:45,360 --> 01:14:47,639
Speaker 4: trauma from her baby's death and that she is having

1637
01:14:47,640 --> 01:14:50,360
Speaker 4: false hopes about adopting my baby, which would be raised

1638
01:14:50,400 --> 01:14:52,920
Speaker 4: in a good home. We also told him that my

1639
01:14:52,960 --> 01:14:55,560
Speaker 4: aunt is feeding into those hopes and has been harassing

1640
01:14:55,600 --> 01:14:58,559
Speaker 4: me on her behalf, causing disturbance and a lot of stress.

1641
01:14:58,640 --> 01:15:01,360
Speaker 4: He told me he understood my and that he knew

1642
01:15:01,360 --> 01:15:03,520
Speaker 4: what my cousin has been going through with her inability

1643
01:15:03,560 --> 01:15:05,680
Speaker 4: to have kids. He said that he would contact my

1644
01:15:05,720 --> 01:15:07,479
Speaker 4: aunt and cousin to see what they have to say

1645
01:15:07,479 --> 01:15:08,280
Speaker 4: about the situation.

1646
01:15:08,600 --> 01:15:10,400
Speaker 2: I talked with him again today.

1647
01:15:10,840 --> 01:15:13,120
Speaker 4: He said that my aunt and cousin would like to

1648
01:15:13,120 --> 01:15:15,160
Speaker 4: speak with me, and that they were concerned that I

1649
01:15:15,240 --> 01:15:18,400
Speaker 4: stopped communicating with them, especially since I moved away.

1650
01:15:19,000 --> 01:15:22,600
Speaker 2: They're probably just concerned, like, what are you like a baby?

1651
01:15:23,160 --> 01:15:25,599
Speaker 4: Are you okay in your pregnancy so that my baby

1652
01:15:25,720 --> 01:15:29,360
Speaker 4: can be healthy as well. I explained to him that

1653
01:15:29,400 --> 01:15:31,960
Speaker 4: their behavior regarding my baby influenced me to do these

1654
01:15:31,960 --> 01:15:34,479
Speaker 4: things and pressed him on what they said. He said

1655
01:15:34,520 --> 01:15:36,960
Speaker 4: that my cousin had talked with the church therapist and

1656
01:15:37,040 --> 01:15:39,240
Speaker 4: was looking into adoption to start a family because her

1657
01:15:39,320 --> 01:15:42,280
Speaker 4: I VF treatments were likely not going to produce a

1658
01:15:42,320 --> 01:15:44,600
Speaker 4: child with her condition. I emphasized to him that I

1659
01:15:44,680 --> 01:15:46,599
Speaker 4: was not giving up my baby and that my cousin

1660
01:15:46,680 --> 01:15:49,200
Speaker 4: had been thinking such. He said that he understood that

1661
01:15:49,280 --> 01:15:52,280
Speaker 4: and started asking me for personal details on how I

1662
01:15:52,320 --> 01:15:54,200
Speaker 4: was doing now. He was again trying to set up

1663
01:15:54,200 --> 01:15:56,320
Speaker 4: a meeting between us and my aunt and cousin, referring

1664
01:15:56,400 --> 01:15:59,160
Speaker 4: us to services. I told him I was not comfortable

1665
01:15:59,200 --> 01:16:01,000
Speaker 4: with that at the moment, and he told me to

1666
01:16:01,040 --> 01:16:03,519
Speaker 4: at least call my cousin once. He said he will

1667
01:16:03,520 --> 01:16:06,160
Speaker 4: meet with my aunt on Sunday, since I was too

1668
01:16:06,200 --> 01:16:07,479
Speaker 4: scared to do it on my own.

1669
01:16:07,800 --> 01:16:13,360
Speaker 2: Girl, girl, mister pastor man, curly curlye, what are you

1670
01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:17,040
Speaker 2: talking about? Too scared? My guy? He's like, he's like,

1671
01:16:17,200 --> 01:16:20,519
Speaker 2: oh my god, they keep bringing these problems on me.

1672
01:16:21,600 --> 01:16:25,120
Speaker 2: Deal with it on your own, Jesus, fix it for you,

1673
01:16:25,680 --> 01:16:28,599
Speaker 2: doctor Jesus exactly. Our call ended.

1674
01:16:28,720 --> 01:16:32,040
Speaker 4: After that, I'll comment any update on what he says

1675
01:16:32,160 --> 01:16:34,400
Speaker 4: in the coming days under this post edits.

1676
01:16:34,400 --> 01:16:35,840
Speaker 2: I'll also edit this post.

1677
01:16:35,560 --> 01:16:37,439
Speaker 4: To make the update easier to find, since I don't

1678
01:16:37,439 --> 01:16:38,960
Speaker 4: want to create a whole different post on it.

1679
01:16:39,040 --> 01:16:39,720
Speaker 2: Another edit.

1680
01:16:40,000 --> 01:16:42,280
Speaker 4: I'm not satisfied with his response and do not like

1681
01:16:42,320 --> 01:16:44,720
Speaker 4: that he is putting pressure on me with reconnecting with

1682
01:16:44,800 --> 01:16:47,520
Speaker 4: my aunt and cousin. He says he understands my concerns,

1683
01:16:47,560 --> 01:16:50,160
Speaker 4: but I think he's being rather dismissive of them and

1684
01:16:50,240 --> 01:16:51,160
Speaker 4: trying to force.

1685
01:16:51,040 --> 01:16:53,760
Speaker 2: Us to resolve our issues. Yeah, it seems like he

1686
01:16:53,840 --> 01:16:55,240
Speaker 2: just thinks this is He's like, oh, it's just a

1687
01:16:55,280 --> 01:16:58,240
Speaker 2: family thing. Whatever, Just say you're sorry or whatever, right,

1688
01:16:58,280 --> 01:17:05,120
Speaker 2: And he's like no, trying to take my child take

1689
01:17:05,200 --> 01:17:05,839
Speaker 2: my child.

1690
01:17:06,120 --> 01:17:09,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's a big issue, especially since they're like relating

1691
01:17:09,479 --> 01:17:14,000
Speaker 4: it to religious things. Yes, it's exactly using religious reasons. Yeah,

1692
01:17:14,120 --> 01:17:16,639
Speaker 4: like maybe he can talk some sense into them. You're

1693
01:17:16,800 --> 01:17:18,519
Speaker 4: using religious reasons as well.

1694
01:17:18,640 --> 01:17:18,840
Speaker 2: You know.

1695
01:17:19,000 --> 01:17:21,120
Speaker 4: My partner and I thought that it was worth a

1696
01:17:21,160 --> 01:17:23,880
Speaker 4: short reaching out to him because he has influence and

1697
01:17:23,960 --> 01:17:26,519
Speaker 4: religious authority over my aunt and cousin. Exactly, I'll see

1698
01:17:26,560 --> 01:17:28,200
Speaker 4: what he says on the next phone call and see

1699
01:17:28,200 --> 01:17:29,920
Speaker 4: what I can do to make him care more. Another

1700
01:17:30,120 --> 01:17:32,639
Speaker 4: edits to make it clear, I didn't give him any

1701
01:17:32,640 --> 01:17:36,000
Speaker 4: personal information and have no plans for any in person

1702
01:17:36,040 --> 01:17:38,519
Speaker 4: meeting with my aunt and cousin. We are in contact

1703
01:17:38,600 --> 01:17:40,759
Speaker 4: with legal help, and we do not live in Utah.

1704
01:17:41,479 --> 01:17:43,400
Speaker 4: Just to make me clear, I get like, might be

1705
01:17:43,520 --> 01:17:46,439
Speaker 4: moments in Utah. They have to be in Utah in

1706
01:17:46,560 --> 01:17:47,200
Speaker 4: the moments.

1707
01:17:48,200 --> 01:17:51,759
Speaker 2: There is another updates. We spoke again with the bishop.

1708
01:17:52,200 --> 01:17:54,599
Speaker 4: He said that there isn't much he can personally do

1709
01:17:54,840 --> 01:17:58,280
Speaker 4: to resolve the situation within his capacity between me and

1710
01:17:58,360 --> 01:18:01,760
Speaker 4: my aunt cousin, other than to for them to counseling services.

1711
01:18:02,200 --> 01:18:06,759
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, that's like not truth. Obviously, you can't force

1712
01:18:06,800 --> 01:18:08,920
Speaker 2: them to do anything, but you can still talk like

1713
01:18:09,040 --> 01:18:12,080
Speaker 2: part of that, part of the role of a religious

1714
01:18:12,120 --> 01:18:16,040
Speaker 2: leader is to offer counsel That's kind of the thing.

1715
01:18:16,120 --> 01:18:18,320
Speaker 2: It's like, that's why you're there, that's why we have

1716
01:18:18,400 --> 01:18:20,800
Speaker 2: I mean, at least I'm relating this to the Catholic Church,

1717
01:18:20,840 --> 01:18:23,880
Speaker 2: but that's like, yeah, you have confession to talk to

1718
01:18:24,800 --> 01:18:28,360
Speaker 2: a pastor or like well, to talk to a priest. Yeah.

1719
01:18:28,560 --> 01:18:31,439
Speaker 4: And maybe since they're like Mormon, maybe it's like different

1720
01:18:31,640 --> 01:18:34,439
Speaker 4: tools because if they have like a church counselor, then

1721
01:18:34,479 --> 01:18:38,800
Speaker 4: maybe it runs a little differently. But still it's also like,

1722
01:18:38,800 --> 01:18:39,519
Speaker 4: like I.

1723
01:18:39,479 --> 01:18:42,360
Speaker 2: Feel like at least counseling would be like.

1724
01:18:42,479 --> 01:18:45,240
Speaker 4: More stuff in conversation with them, Like if counseling was

1725
01:18:45,280 --> 01:18:46,720
Speaker 4: like the right thing to do in this situation, it

1726
01:18:46,720 --> 01:18:48,640
Speaker 4: would probably be more effective. But it doesn't seem like

1727
01:18:48,680 --> 01:18:50,640
Speaker 4: it is, because I think they went to counseling. So

1728
01:18:51,240 --> 01:18:53,000
Speaker 4: I asked him if he did meet with my aunt,

1729
01:18:53,080 --> 01:18:55,759
Speaker 4: and he said he did. Their conversation was apparently focused

1730
01:18:55,800 --> 01:18:57,800
Speaker 4: on my cousin and helping her heal. He told me

1731
01:18:57,840 --> 01:19:00,000
Speaker 4: that my cousin was also grieving the loss of communication

1732
01:19:00,280 --> 01:19:02,720
Speaker 4: with me and my sister, who hasn't been talking to

1733
01:19:02,720 --> 01:19:04,800
Speaker 4: her much anymore. I told him that my cousin was

1734
01:19:04,840 --> 01:19:07,200
Speaker 4: trying to take my baby to replace hers, and that

1735
01:19:07,320 --> 01:19:10,240
Speaker 4: her and my aunt's behavior was threatening the safety and

1736
01:19:10,280 --> 01:19:12,680
Speaker 4: well being of me and my family. I think he

1737
01:19:12,760 --> 01:19:15,320
Speaker 4: was losing interest in the conversation, so he just told

1738
01:19:15,360 --> 01:19:17,759
Speaker 4: me to do whatever I feel is that's for my family,

1739
01:19:18,080 --> 01:19:20,320
Speaker 4: but to consider the grief my cousin has been through

1740
01:19:20,360 --> 01:19:23,679
Speaker 4: and contact family counseling services for further help on this matter.

1741
01:19:23,840 --> 01:19:30,599
Speaker 2: This is me son. He's like, Okay, gus, go talk

1742
01:19:30,600 --> 01:19:31,360
Speaker 2: to someone else.

1743
01:19:32,400 --> 01:19:34,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's crazy. I really I wonder too, Like, I

1744
01:19:34,840 --> 01:19:37,320
Speaker 4: just can't imagine if this was brought up in their

1745
01:19:37,360 --> 01:19:39,040
Speaker 4: counseling or if he didn't want to bring it up

1746
01:19:39,120 --> 01:19:41,800
Speaker 4: or something, or if it was brought up, then maybe

1747
01:19:41,800 --> 01:19:43,840
Speaker 4: he just like, yeah, there's no saving that.

1748
01:19:44,000 --> 01:19:47,600
Speaker 2: I can't help you like an issue an ish me.

1749
01:19:48,520 --> 01:19:49,040
Speaker 2: There you go.

1750
01:19:49,360 --> 01:19:51,439
Speaker 4: Me and my partner sent him an email afterwards with

1751
01:19:51,479 --> 01:19:54,559
Speaker 4: a copy to our lawyer to close off communication. I

1752
01:19:54,640 --> 01:19:57,360
Speaker 4: decided to unblock my cousin and send her a message.

1753
01:19:57,400 --> 01:19:59,120
Speaker 4: I told her that my partner and I are keeping

1754
01:19:59,160 --> 01:20:01,519
Speaker 4: our baby and that is not up for discussion. I

1755
01:20:01,640 --> 01:20:04,160
Speaker 4: encouraged her to seek proper therapy if she hasn't already

1756
01:20:04,160 --> 01:20:06,120
Speaker 4: done so, and told her that I am not comfortable

1757
01:20:06,160 --> 01:20:08,640
Speaker 4: with her, her husband, or my aunt being involved in

1758
01:20:08,680 --> 01:20:11,680
Speaker 4: my child's life. She hasn't responded yet. Regardless of what

1759
01:20:11,760 --> 01:20:14,120
Speaker 4: she says, our relationship will not return to as it

1760
01:20:14,200 --> 01:20:16,160
Speaker 4: was before and she will not be a part of

1761
01:20:16,200 --> 01:20:22,679
Speaker 4: my child's life. And there is another update five months later.

1762
01:20:23,520 --> 01:20:26,840
Speaker 2: Five months later, here's the update everyone has been waiting for.

1763
01:20:28,280 --> 01:20:30,360
Speaker 4: I was busy in the last few months with the

1764
01:20:30,360 --> 01:20:32,840
Speaker 4: birth and projects I have been working on as I

1765
01:20:32,880 --> 01:20:35,120
Speaker 4: recover from birth and take care of my new baby.

1766
01:20:35,200 --> 01:20:37,120
Speaker 2: I logged inter redded a few times since then, but

1767
01:20:37,200 --> 01:20:38,400
Speaker 2: haven't gotten a chance to update.

1768
01:20:38,680 --> 01:20:41,360
Speaker 4: I am now twenty five and my baby is almost

1769
01:20:41,360 --> 01:20:42,040
Speaker 4: four months old.

1770
01:20:42,120 --> 01:20:45,640
Speaker 2: Time flies woo. She's doing well and brings us so

1771
01:20:45,920 --> 01:20:48,360
Speaker 2: much joy. I love going on walks with her and

1772
01:20:48,400 --> 01:20:51,240
Speaker 2: she's growing up so fast. Love it. I am planning

1773
01:20:51,280 --> 01:20:53,599
Speaker 2: to go back to work soon, looking for a new job.

1774
01:20:53,680 --> 01:20:54,680
Speaker 2: Thank you all for the.

1775
01:20:54,600 --> 01:20:56,960
Speaker 4: Concern and well wishes, and I hope everyone is having

1776
01:20:57,000 --> 01:20:59,760
Speaker 4: a great time during the Thanksgiving holiday season. Now the

1777
01:21:00,160 --> 01:21:03,720
Speaker 4: date that everyone is looking forward to. My cousin and

1778
01:21:03,800 --> 01:21:06,360
Speaker 4: my aunt. Since my last update, my cousin and my

1779
01:21:06,400 --> 01:21:09,320
Speaker 4: aunt were silent for a while, and my cousin didn't

1780
01:21:09,360 --> 01:21:11,680
Speaker 4: respond to my text. In August, my aunt reached out

1781
01:21:11,680 --> 01:21:13,960
Speaker 4: to me through a new number and asked me how

1782
01:21:14,000 --> 01:21:15,880
Speaker 4: I was and if I had the baby yet.

1783
01:21:16,040 --> 01:21:16,599
Speaker 2: We talked.

1784
01:21:16,720 --> 01:21:18,960
Speaker 4: She was concerned about mine and my baby as well

1785
01:21:19,000 --> 01:21:21,600
Speaker 4: being since I distanced myself from a lot of my

1786
01:21:21,680 --> 01:21:24,000
Speaker 4: family and had to leave my job. I asked about

1787
01:21:24,000 --> 01:21:26,559
Speaker 4: my cousin. She says that they've been trying to adopt

1788
01:21:26,560 --> 01:21:28,960
Speaker 4: a baby through their church connections, but nothing has been

1789
01:21:28,960 --> 01:21:32,120
Speaker 4: successful so far because they probably just started on that

1790
01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:37,120
Speaker 4: also through the church connections. Does that mean like there's

1791
01:21:37,360 --> 01:21:39,519
Speaker 4: people in the church that are giving up their children

1792
01:21:39,520 --> 01:21:42,040
Speaker 4: for adoption, or they know people, or does it mean

1793
01:21:42,040 --> 01:21:44,360
Speaker 4: that they see other pregnant people in the church and

1794
01:21:44,400 --> 01:21:49,280
Speaker 4: I'm just like, hey, he can have your baby, you can, Hey, hey,

1795
01:21:49,439 --> 01:21:53,040
Speaker 4: are you gonna Are you gonna have that? Someone is

1796
01:21:53,200 --> 01:21:55,320
Speaker 4: finishings like, are you gonna fish fish that?

1797
01:21:56,400 --> 01:21:57,920
Speaker 2: Are you gonna are you either gonna take care of

1798
01:21:58,000 --> 01:22:00,240
Speaker 2: that take care of that baby. I'll take you. I'll

1799
01:22:00,280 --> 01:22:02,439
Speaker 2: take it if you don't want it. That's That's what

1800
01:22:02,479 --> 01:22:04,800
Speaker 2: I'm gonna guess, is their connections.

1801
01:22:05,000 --> 01:22:08,120
Speaker 4: I asked about whether they consulted with the proper adoption agency,

1802
01:22:08,160 --> 01:22:11,160
Speaker 4: but my aunt said that my cousin's husbands passed may

1803
01:22:11,240 --> 01:22:12,040
Speaker 4: become a problem.

1804
01:22:12,520 --> 01:22:15,840
Speaker 2: Didn't know about that. Well, they said earlier that she'd

1805
01:22:15,840 --> 01:22:18,120
Speaker 2: been denied by a bunch of agencies. Oh, I forgot

1806
01:22:18,120 --> 01:22:21,280
Speaker 2: about that. Do we know what his past is? I

1807
01:22:21,600 --> 01:22:24,639
Speaker 2: don't know. If we've heard about that mafia. I think

1808
01:22:24,680 --> 01:22:28,719
Speaker 2: you got it, the Mormon mafia. The more, the more mafia.

1809
01:22:29,080 --> 01:22:32,559
Speaker 4: And she proceeded to rant about how the white birth

1810
01:22:32,680 --> 01:22:37,720
Speaker 4: rate is dropping and how people were actively denying themselves parenthood.

1811
01:22:38,920 --> 01:22:43,000
Speaker 2: Okay, oh, don't like that. Don't like that one bit.

1812
01:22:44,439 --> 01:22:47,000
Speaker 2: Oh boy, I don't know to say about that.

1813
01:22:50,320 --> 01:22:52,240
Speaker 4: She asked me if I still wanted the baby, and

1814
01:22:52,280 --> 01:22:55,840
Speaker 4: got angry about nine month terminations. She is pro life

1815
01:22:55,840 --> 01:22:59,599
Speaker 4: without exceptions. Oh my god, Oh so that's the denying

1816
01:22:59,800 --> 01:23:00,639
Speaker 4: their own pregnant.

1817
01:23:00,720 --> 01:23:05,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, is this like when when like pro lifers are like, oh,

1818
01:23:05,439 --> 01:23:09,800
Speaker 2: like there's all these terminations happening, like right before the

1819
01:23:09,840 --> 01:23:13,080
Speaker 2: baby is born, which is that's just birth? That is

1820
01:23:13,160 --> 01:23:16,720
Speaker 2: just birth? Is that like what they do with the

1821
01:23:16,760 --> 01:23:19,200
Speaker 2: statistics or something. Yeah, they're like, yeah, like all of

1822
01:23:19,240 --> 01:23:23,000
Speaker 2: these babies are getting terminated, like at nine months. I'm like,

1823
01:23:23,080 --> 01:23:26,439
Speaker 2: that's just birth, baby, girl, Like, that's just birth.

1824
01:23:26,479 --> 01:23:29,920
Speaker 4: But also too in this case, like of these people,

1825
01:23:30,200 --> 01:23:31,400
Speaker 4: still births also happened.

1826
01:23:31,600 --> 01:23:34,439
Speaker 2: Yes, I mean also that there are a lot of

1827
01:23:34,439 --> 01:23:39,160
Speaker 2: different reasons why pregnancy cannot come to term exactly.

1828
01:23:40,800 --> 01:23:43,759
Speaker 4: I reaffirmed to her that I did, and she talked

1829
01:23:43,760 --> 01:23:45,479
Speaker 4: about how my cousin was getting old.

1830
01:23:45,880 --> 01:23:49,639
Speaker 2: But she's in her early thirties. I'm wondering when they're gonna,

1831
01:23:49,720 --> 01:23:53,559
Speaker 2: like what's the timeline for them? Not asking are you

1832
01:23:53,560 --> 01:23:54,519
Speaker 2: still having the baby?

1833
01:23:54,720 --> 01:23:54,960
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1834
01:23:55,000 --> 01:23:55,200
Speaker 1: Really?

1835
01:23:55,320 --> 01:23:58,439
Speaker 2: How old is that? Maybe four months? Like is it

1836
01:23:58,479 --> 01:24:01,080
Speaker 2: like eighteen? And they're like, hey, don't have that baby still?

1837
01:24:01,120 --> 01:24:03,960
Speaker 2: Like is this like the baby for eighteen years? Could

1838
01:24:04,000 --> 01:24:06,800
Speaker 2: I keep going on my turn? Like you've had it

1839
01:24:06,840 --> 01:24:09,720
Speaker 2: long enough, you let's switch. Let's just like trade off, right,

1840
01:24:10,600 --> 01:24:12,639
Speaker 2: you take it every two years, I take it every

1841
01:24:12,640 --> 01:24:15,879
Speaker 2: three years. It's fine. But she's in her early thirties

1842
01:24:15,920 --> 01:24:17,639
Speaker 2: and that her nest is still empty.

1843
01:24:18,600 --> 01:24:21,280
Speaker 4: She wanted me to at least share the joy and

1844
01:24:21,479 --> 01:24:23,960
Speaker 4: let me cousin and let my cousin.

1845
01:24:24,080 --> 01:24:27,080
Speaker 2: Ye meet my daughter's life, let me cousin, Let me

1846
01:24:27,280 --> 01:24:30,240
Speaker 2: be in my daughter's life and spend time with her.

1847
01:24:30,320 --> 01:24:32,960
Speaker 4: I told her that that would not be possible due

1848
01:24:33,040 --> 01:24:35,080
Speaker 4: to their past behavior. I fear that my cousin would

1849
01:24:35,120 --> 01:24:37,200
Speaker 4: try to become her mother and let her delusions get

1850
01:24:37,240 --> 01:24:39,519
Speaker 4: her again, absolutely, or kidnap her chase.

1851
01:24:39,560 --> 01:24:40,880
Speaker 2: Yes, I feel like that is a lot of a

1852
01:24:41,000 --> 01:24:44,080
Speaker 2: very dangerous things about letting her be around your kid. Absolutely.

1853
01:24:44,520 --> 01:24:46,400
Speaker 4: My aunt said that my cousin was trying to become

1854
01:24:46,439 --> 01:24:50,160
Speaker 4: better and got some church counseling. I still told her no.

1855
01:24:51,120 --> 01:24:53,519
Speaker 4: She then asked me if I knew anyone or any

1856
01:24:53,560 --> 01:24:56,120
Speaker 4: resources to adopt a baby. I told her I didn't,

1857
01:24:56,200 --> 01:24:58,679
Speaker 4: and then my cousin and her husband should be careful

1858
01:24:58,800 --> 01:25:01,080
Speaker 4: and patient with trying to be come parents. My aunt

1859
01:25:01,080 --> 01:25:04,479
Speaker 4: emphasized how becoming parents was important to my cousin and

1860
01:25:04,520 --> 01:25:08,639
Speaker 4: her husband because they deserves children at this point.

1861
01:25:08,200 --> 01:25:10,040
Speaker 2: And for deserves children.

1862
01:25:10,120 --> 01:25:12,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't know what that means, Like, like are

1863
01:25:12,640 --> 01:25:15,200
Speaker 4: you saying, op, he doesn't deserve so the child, like

1864
01:25:15,200 --> 01:25:18,320
Speaker 4: having a child is not for you, the like you

1865
01:25:18,360 --> 01:25:22,320
Speaker 4: as a parent are like are there for the child right?

1866
01:25:22,600 --> 01:25:26,760
Speaker 2: Nail way around? Right? And for their reputation? Oh my god?

1867
01:25:26,880 --> 01:25:29,200
Speaker 4: Whoa they deserve children at this point and for the

1868
01:25:29,280 --> 01:25:33,560
Speaker 4: reputation since everyone around them is reaching the parenthood milestone.

1869
01:25:33,640 --> 01:25:37,679
Speaker 2: Girl, you're like everyone else is having one. I want

1870
01:25:37,720 --> 01:25:40,880
Speaker 2: one one fair. I get it that you can't, and

1871
01:25:40,920 --> 01:25:45,479
Speaker 2: that's that breaking. It is really sad like this. Yeah,

1872
01:25:45,720 --> 01:25:46,200
Speaker 2: you can't.

1873
01:25:46,280 --> 01:25:50,200
Speaker 4: You can't just react with this and just expect her

1874
01:25:50,240 --> 01:25:51,679
Speaker 4: to give you a baby.

1875
01:25:51,720 --> 01:25:54,479
Speaker 2: You can't cheap, cheap trying to steal babies. Stop it

1876
01:25:54,680 --> 01:25:57,120
Speaker 2: because it's like, well then what about them? Yeah, well no,

1877
01:25:57,200 --> 01:25:59,879
Speaker 2: they don't have a baby. They don't deserve a baby. Yeah, exactly.

1878
01:26:00,280 --> 01:26:02,720
Speaker 4: She asked about my future family plans and pushed me

1879
01:26:02,800 --> 01:26:04,840
Speaker 4: on when I'm going to get pregnant again.

1880
01:26:04,720 --> 01:26:08,120
Speaker 2: Or have my next child? Girl, girl, can of this one?

1881
01:26:08,160 --> 01:26:09,240
Speaker 2: Can of any of the other ones?

1882
01:26:09,360 --> 01:26:11,360
Speaker 4: Unless you like pay me to be a surrogate me

1883
01:26:11,520 --> 01:26:16,160
Speaker 4: being OPI Yeah. She told me family planning was important,

1884
01:26:16,280 --> 01:26:19,240
Speaker 4: especially after this surprise pregnancy, and asked if they could

1885
01:26:19,280 --> 01:26:22,360
Speaker 4: be involved next time, involved in the pregnancy. You want

1886
01:26:22,360 --> 01:26:23,400
Speaker 4: to be there when it's concealed.

1887
01:26:23,960 --> 01:26:26,040
Speaker 2: If it was meire like, we'll just be in the background.

1888
01:26:26,840 --> 01:26:27,920
Speaker 2: We wouldn't have been making noise.

1889
01:26:28,160 --> 01:26:30,439
Speaker 4: Yeah, you won't even know where they're As the call

1890
01:26:30,560 --> 01:26:33,120
Speaker 4: went on, more and more of her past and unusual

1891
01:26:33,160 --> 01:26:36,320
Speaker 4: behavior became a parent and I was getting tired of it.

1892
01:26:36,880 --> 01:26:39,040
Speaker 4: I wanted to end the call, but she ended it

1893
01:26:39,080 --> 01:26:40,840
Speaker 4: first because she had some activity.

1894
01:26:41,160 --> 01:26:43,600
Speaker 2: I really hope that she gets helped, though, like truthfully, like,

1895
01:26:43,680 --> 01:26:46,880
Speaker 2: yes'm this is sam much she needs. This is sal help. Yeah,

1896
01:26:46,880 --> 01:26:49,559
Speaker 2: because she has gone through like a really traumatic experience

1897
01:26:49,600 --> 01:26:53,040
Speaker 2: and like incredible losses and has come out of it

1898
01:26:53,200 --> 01:26:57,000
Speaker 2: just just not well health. And she has these people

1899
01:26:57,560 --> 01:27:02,040
Speaker 2: encouraging her to these crazy ideas. Yeah, and it's I

1900
01:27:02,040 --> 01:27:02,960
Speaker 2: really hope she gets help.

1901
01:27:03,240 --> 01:27:05,519
Speaker 4: Thankfully, I have my sister to keep me in the

1902
01:27:05,560 --> 01:27:07,800
Speaker 4: loop with what's happening with my aunt and cousin and

1903
01:27:07,880 --> 01:27:11,200
Speaker 4: other matters regarding my family and my old church. Everything

1904
01:27:11,240 --> 01:27:13,919
Speaker 4: my aunt said was apparently true about my cousin. According

1905
01:27:13,920 --> 01:27:16,439
Speaker 4: to my sister, my cousin's overall mental health seems to

1906
01:27:16,479 --> 01:27:18,760
Speaker 4: have improved from her worst, but she still has her

1907
01:27:18,800 --> 01:27:20,200
Speaker 4: deep depressive periods.

1908
01:27:20,360 --> 01:27:22,439
Speaker 2: I mean, until she stops asking for your child, I

1909
01:27:22,439 --> 01:27:25,800
Speaker 2: think you can assume that she's not doing great. She

1910
01:27:25,920 --> 01:27:29,040
Speaker 2: sometimes feels very empty with her lack of children and

1911
01:27:29,080 --> 01:27:32,000
Speaker 2: her worstened relationships with me and my sister. That could

1912
01:27:32,000 --> 01:27:35,519
Speaker 2: be true, And I mean, I'm sure that that's something

1913
01:27:35,600 --> 01:27:38,200
Speaker 2: that should be looked at. Yeah, because that is a

1914
01:27:38,320 --> 01:27:40,840
Speaker 2: very I mean, that's a very common feeling for women

1915
01:27:40,880 --> 01:27:44,879
Speaker 2: who lose children, yeah, and or who can't have children.

1916
01:27:44,920 --> 01:27:49,519
Speaker 2: And like, it's totally understandable to be sad and depressed

1917
01:27:49,520 --> 01:27:54,040
Speaker 2: and to have that jealousy even or longing, but when

1918
01:27:54,080 --> 01:27:56,479
Speaker 2: it comes to a point like this, you.

1919
01:27:56,439 --> 01:27:58,639
Speaker 4: Can't react in this way. And it's also like hard

1920
01:27:58,680 --> 01:28:01,559
Speaker 4: because she obviously can and see that. Like the worst

1921
01:28:01,560 --> 01:28:06,240
Speaker 4: in relationships with me and my sister is Yeah, these

1922
01:28:06,640 --> 01:28:08,160
Speaker 4: like unhealthy reactions.

1923
01:28:08,160 --> 01:28:12,599
Speaker 2: The thing is that if she was like reacting better,

1924
01:28:13,760 --> 01:28:16,840
Speaker 2: she'd probably be able to be around these kids. Yeah,

1925
01:28:16,840 --> 01:28:18,640
Speaker 2: we should probably be able to have a relationship with

1926
01:28:18,680 --> 01:28:21,880
Speaker 2: these kids. And yet she's in trying to pull them

1927
01:28:21,880 --> 01:28:24,120
Speaker 2: closer to her, she's pushing further away. So maybe we

1928
01:28:24,200 --> 01:28:26,360
Speaker 2: can like explain that. Yeah, it's like, yeah, I want,

1929
01:28:26,400 --> 01:28:27,960
Speaker 2: like I want you to be around the kids, but

1930
01:28:28,040 --> 01:28:30,120
Speaker 2: you can't keep trying to take them.

1931
01:28:30,160 --> 01:28:37,120
Speaker 4: Right, right, But we always want you to be around us.

1932
01:28:37,439 --> 01:28:39,519
Speaker 4: All you have to do is listen to episodes just

1933
01:28:39,640 --> 01:28:43,639
Speaker 4: like this one on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or your favorite

1934
01:28:43,640 --> 01:28:44,400
Speaker 4: podcast app.

1935
01:28:44,520 --> 01:28:44,920
Speaker 2: Just search.

1936
01:28:45,040 --> 01:28:52,800
Speaker 4: Okay, storytime, We'll always do that, but there is a

1937
01:28:52,840 --> 01:28:55,280
Speaker 4: little bit more. My cousin and her husband are also

1938
01:28:55,360 --> 01:28:58,880
Speaker 4: trying to find an IVF doctor abroad in hopes of

1939
01:28:58,880 --> 01:29:01,280
Speaker 4: a miracle, since a lot of their options are shutting

1940
01:29:01,360 --> 01:29:04,040
Speaker 4: down here. My cousin apparently still views my baby as

1941
01:29:04,080 --> 01:29:08,040
Speaker 4: something she lost interesting, but she believes God will give

1942
01:29:08,040 --> 01:29:10,639
Speaker 4: her kids soon and has been trying to get her

1943
01:29:10,680 --> 01:29:14,479
Speaker 4: sins forgiven. We are skipping Thanksgiving with my side of

1944
01:29:14,479 --> 01:29:16,800
Speaker 4: the family in a few days for obvious reasons. I

1945
01:29:16,800 --> 01:29:19,760
Speaker 4: am going back to the workforce soon, likely after all

1946
01:29:19,800 --> 01:29:23,000
Speaker 4: the holidays. I have my childcare arrangements ready with all

1947
01:29:23,000 --> 01:29:26,759
Speaker 4: the necessary precautions, and the future is looking good overall. Again,

1948
01:29:26,920 --> 01:29:28,800
Speaker 4: thank you all for your support and let me know

1949
01:29:28,840 --> 01:29:32,840
Speaker 4: if you have any questions about anything Mormonism, my family, motherhood, etc.

1950
01:29:33,280 --> 01:29:35,160
Speaker 2: And that is the end of the story.