1 00:00:04,795 --> 00:00:14,555 Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. This 2 00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:19,235 Speaker 1: is a Countdown bulletin podcast. And let's all congratulate Donald 3 00:00:19,235 --> 00:00:23,195 Speaker 1: Trump on talking himself into yet another gag order for 4 00:00:23,355 --> 00:00:27,395 Speaker 1: reasons that border on the hilarious. As of Sunday evening, 5 00:00:27,515 --> 00:00:31,275 Speaker 1: it was still unclear if Judge Tanya Chutkin had broadened 6 00:00:31,395 --> 00:00:34,435 Speaker 1: or clarified her gag order against Trump in the election 7 00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:38,595 Speaker 1: subversion trial in Washington, or more importantly, if she had 8 00:00:38,675 --> 00:00:42,755 Speaker 1: perhaps specifically threatened Trump with jail time if he violates 9 00:00:42,795 --> 00:00:45,955 Speaker 1: the gag order. But we know this much, she has 10 00:00:46,075 --> 00:00:50,715 Speaker 1: reinstated her gag order on Trump in this case. His 11 00:00:50,835 --> 00:00:55,035 Speaker 1: attorneys had convinced Chutkin to temporarily lift that cone of 12 00:00:55,075 --> 00:00:58,275 Speaker 1: silence from over him about the Washington trial while they 13 00:00:58,315 --> 00:01:00,875 Speaker 1: appealed it and tried to convince her to cancel the 14 00:01:00,915 --> 00:01:04,595 Speaker 1: gag order outright, and late Friday night, they had expanded 15 00:01:04,595 --> 00:01:08,795 Speaker 1: their filing to position Trump's ability to martyr himself as 16 00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:13,635 Speaker 1: the key campaign issue with the American public unquote. Smith's 17 00:01:13,675 --> 00:01:18,235 Speaker 1: office replied overnight Wednesday, not only opposing a permanent removal 18 00:01:18,235 --> 00:01:20,915 Speaker 1: of the gag order, but insisting that Trump had begun 19 00:01:21,195 --> 00:01:25,755 Speaker 1: to seriously threaten and endanger witnesses at trial, like his 20 00:01:25,875 --> 00:01:29,115 Speaker 1: former chief of staff Mark Meadows, and that Chutkin had 21 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:33,075 Speaker 1: to reverse the temporary reprieve and Sunday evening she did 22 00:01:33,195 --> 00:01:38,915 Speaker 1: exactly that. Nice work Dementia Jay in an irony befitting 23 00:01:38,955 --> 00:01:42,155 Speaker 1: the topic and the online mosh pit in which Trump 24 00:01:42,155 --> 00:01:45,235 Speaker 1: has done most of his threatening. The court system that 25 00:01:45,395 --> 00:01:48,835 Speaker 1: gives lawyers and reporters and the public access to the 26 00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:53,315 Speaker 1: findings of almost any court's decision. The new Trump gag 27 00:01:53,435 --> 00:01:58,995 Speaker 1: order was itself gagged. The online system PACER public access 28 00:01:58,995 --> 00:02:02,795 Speaker 1: to court electronic records was showing only the order itself 29 00:02:03,355 --> 00:02:07,355 Speaker 1: and not the accompanying opinion. So we know Judge Chutkin 30 00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:10,275 Speaker 1: had something more to say about Trump and to Trump 31 00:02:10,475 --> 00:02:13,635 Speaker 1: and to Jack Smith and to the public. And as 32 00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:16,435 Speaker 1: of recording time, we don't know what the hell. It is. 33 00:02:17,235 --> 00:02:22,475 Speaker 1: A gag order so broad it has accidentally gagged the judge, 34 00:02:23,475 --> 00:02:26,395 Speaker 1: But it isn't hard to guess why she decided what 35 00:02:26,515 --> 00:02:30,395 Speaker 1: she decided. Quote. I don't think Mark Meadows would lie 36 00:02:30,675 --> 00:02:37,675 Speaker 1: merely forgetting immunity against prosecution parentheses persecution by deranged prosecutor 37 00:02:37,795 --> 00:02:41,915 Speaker 1: Jack Smith. Trump began last Tuesday, but when you really 38 00:02:41,955 --> 00:02:45,435 Speaker 1: think about it, being hounded like a dog for three years, 39 00:02:45,755 --> 00:02:48,315 Speaker 1: told you'll be going to jail the rest of your life, 40 00:02:48,395 --> 00:02:51,555 Speaker 1: your money, and your family will be gone forever, etc. 41 00:02:52,795 --> 00:02:56,235 Speaker 1: He's barely two sentences into his insane gurglings, and he 42 00:02:56,275 --> 00:03:00,515 Speaker 1: has implied Meadows lied, that Meadows was threatened, that Meadows 43 00:03:00,635 --> 00:03:04,035 Speaker 1: was bribed, that Meadows was hounded for three years, even 44 00:03:04,075 --> 00:03:07,275 Speaker 1: though three years ago today Trump was still president and 45 00:03:07,315 --> 00:03:11,035 Speaker 1: the election was still a week away. Quote. Some people 46 00:03:11,035 --> 00:03:14,195 Speaker 1: would make that deal, but they are weaklings and cowards 47 00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:18,475 Speaker 1: and so bad. And there's the added implied threat against 48 00:03:18,475 --> 00:03:21,555 Speaker 1: Meadows in that, and all because of news reports that 49 00:03:21,675 --> 00:03:24,835 Speaker 1: ran the gamut from describing a full Meadows flip against 50 00:03:24,915 --> 00:03:28,635 Speaker 1: Trump to some limited testimony forced by court order to 51 00:03:28,835 --> 00:03:33,675 Speaker 1: ongoing negotiations between the Special Council's office and Meadows attorneys 52 00:03:33,915 --> 00:03:39,035 Speaker 1: about a full negotiated plea deal. There were few more 53 00:03:39,115 --> 00:03:41,995 Speaker 1: things Trump could have squeezed in there that would have 54 00:03:42,115 --> 00:03:46,155 Speaker 1: also violated the original Chutkin gag order, except perhaps if 55 00:03:46,155 --> 00:03:50,275 Speaker 1: he had threatened to burn down Meadows's house, as the 56 00:03:50,275 --> 00:03:54,155 Speaker 1: Special Council also noted in his filing, long before Jack 57 00:03:54,195 --> 00:03:56,875 Speaker 1: Smith or the judge began to treat the concept of 58 00:03:56,915 --> 00:04:00,275 Speaker 1: a gag order seriously. There were the original terms of 59 00:04:00,275 --> 00:04:05,035 Speaker 1: Trump's release on bail after his indictment. Making content attacked 60 00:04:05,035 --> 00:04:09,435 Speaker 1: with a probable witness was forbidden in those original terms, 61 00:04:09,715 --> 00:04:13,155 Speaker 1: whether the contact was direct and secret or via some 62 00:04:13,275 --> 00:04:17,195 Speaker 1: public medium, and Chutkin was no doubt further influenced by 63 00:04:17,235 --> 00:04:20,595 Speaker 1: how Trump tried to get around the other gag order 64 00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,915 Speaker 1: He's got running at the moment, the one the New 65 00:04:22,995 --> 00:04:26,435 Speaker 1: York State Judge Arthur Engern imposed to protect his court 66 00:04:26,475 --> 00:04:30,115 Speaker 1: staff after Trump docks the court clerk, then was ordered 67 00:04:30,155 --> 00:04:32,915 Speaker 1: to delete that post, then was discovered to have left 68 00:04:32,955 --> 00:04:35,835 Speaker 1: an image of that post up, then made a veiled 69 00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:39,035 Speaker 1: disparaging reference to the clerk to the media, then took 70 00:04:39,075 --> 00:04:42,395 Speaker 1: the stand at the judge's insistence and promptly perjured himself 71 00:04:42,515 --> 00:04:45,235 Speaker 1: and insisted, no, he wasn't talking about her, the clerk, 72 00:04:45,875 --> 00:04:51,675 Speaker 1: He was talking about Michael Cohen. Moreover, on Saturday, Trump 73 00:04:51,915 --> 00:04:58,555 Speaker 1: again attacked Judge Ngron online three separate times, calling him crazed, 74 00:04:58,635 --> 00:05:02,475 Speaker 1: among other things, and again insisting, in that vague stochastic 75 00:05:02,515 --> 00:05:06,355 Speaker 1: way of his that quote this radical Trump hater must 76 00:05:06,395 --> 00:05:10,475 Speaker 1: be taken off this case, which is just fuzzy enough 77 00:05:10,515 --> 00:05:13,355 Speaker 1: in terms of composition to allow Trump to again lie 78 00:05:13,715 --> 00:05:15,955 Speaker 1: and claim he is not trying to get one of 79 00:05:15,995 --> 00:05:21,195 Speaker 1: his more psychopathic cultists to physically attack Engron on Trump's behalf. 80 00:05:22,195 --> 00:05:25,675 Speaker 1: It continues to amaze me that this judge Andngron has 81 00:05:25,715 --> 00:05:28,635 Speaker 1: not expanded his gag order in the New York case 82 00:05:28,835 --> 00:05:32,835 Speaker 1: to include not just court staff but everybody involved. If 83 00:05:32,875 --> 00:05:37,275 Speaker 1: he had, Trump would already be doing twenty five to life. 84 00:05:37,315 --> 00:05:39,675 Speaker 1: I have said this before, and I will say it again. 85 00:05:39,835 --> 00:05:43,875 Speaker 1: Our other American pro democracy institutions have collapsed under the 86 00:05:43,875 --> 00:05:47,555 Speaker 1: weight of something new and of somebody so devoid of 87 00:05:47,635 --> 00:05:50,915 Speaker 1: human qualities that he can break any law or norm, 88 00:05:51,195 --> 00:05:54,595 Speaker 1: or even just custom without the slightest hesitation or guilt. 89 00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:59,275 Speaker 1: The last line of defense in this country is the judiciary. 90 00:05:59,635 --> 00:06:02,675 Speaker 1: What Chutkin has done is not just to reimpose a 91 00:06:02,715 --> 00:06:05,915 Speaker 1: gag order that is, by itself the only practical way 92 00:06:06,075 --> 00:06:10,195 Speaker 1: of controlling a diseased animal like Trump, but also she 93 00:06:10,315 --> 00:06:14,315 Speaker 1: has indicated to his lawyers and even to him, if 94 00:06:14,355 --> 00:06:17,715 Speaker 1: he can faintly make out the sound of anything besides 95 00:06:17,755 --> 00:06:23,595 Speaker 1: the voice of his own vast, pulsating, undulating ego, that 96 00:06:23,755 --> 00:06:26,755 Speaker 1: if you play with fire. This judge is going to 97 00:06:26,795 --> 00:06:30,035 Speaker 1: make sure that you are the one who gets burned 98 00:06:31,755 --> 00:06:35,675 Speaker 1: once the online system comes back. That is, there is 99 00:06:35,715 --> 00:06:37,795 Speaker 1: a second irony here that I want to mention in 100 00:06:37,835 --> 00:06:40,875 Speaker 1: this bulletin edition. This is from one of Trump's campaign 101 00:06:40,915 --> 00:06:45,915 Speaker 1: stops Saturday at the Republican Jewish Coalition hearing in Iowa. 102 00:06:46,315 --> 00:06:50,515 Speaker 1: It is about three stumbles shy of a full Jackie Gleason, 103 00:06:50,755 --> 00:06:53,275 Speaker 1: Ralph Cramdon, Humana Hamana, Humana. 104 00:06:53,635 --> 00:06:59,115 Speaker 2: Colleges and universities will purge the anti Semitism and pro terroritist. 105 00:07:00,275 --> 00:07:04,075 Speaker 1: What you're doing the terrorism boy, If I had a 106 00:07:04,155 --> 00:07:07,275 Speaker 1: dollar for every time I said that. There is the 107 00:07:07,395 --> 00:07:10,635 Speaker 1: contrarian position about the various gag orders against Trump that 108 00:07:10,755 --> 00:07:14,555 Speaker 1: during a time when his mental incapacities are obviously accelerating, 109 00:07:14,875 --> 00:07:18,195 Speaker 1: a gag order keeping him from saying stuff like that 110 00:07:19,155 --> 00:07:24,315 Speaker 1: might actually help him. At eight forty Eastern Sunday night, 111 00:07:24,355 --> 00:07:27,475 Speaker 1: Trump revealed online system failures or not that they have 112 00:07:27,595 --> 00:07:29,915 Speaker 1: managed to let him know that the gag order is 113 00:07:29,955 --> 00:07:34,235 Speaker 1: back in effect. Quote, the corrupt Biden administration just took 114 00:07:34,235 --> 00:07:37,595 Speaker 1: away my First Amendment right to free speech. Then switching 115 00:07:37,635 --> 00:07:43,635 Speaker 1: to all caps not constitutional? Make America great? Again. If 116 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:47,875 Speaker 1: Chutkins's decision does nothing else, it has at minimum cut 117 00:07:47,915 --> 00:07:52,475 Speaker 1: down on the interminable length of Trump's posts. That one 118 00:07:53,155 --> 00:08:00,675 Speaker 1: is just twenty words. Thank God for small blessings. The 119 00:08:00,715 --> 00:08:03,115 Speaker 1: rest of this bullet in edition of the Countdown podcast 120 00:08:03,235 --> 00:08:06,475 Speaker 1: is a repeat of Friday's. So if you've heard that 121 00:08:06,595 --> 00:08:08,875 Speaker 1: and you wish to bail out right now, I wouldn't 122 00:08:08,915 --> 00:08:11,195 Speaker 1: blame you. I'll be back with a full new edition 123 00:08:11,195 --> 00:08:14,435 Speaker 1: at the usual hour Monday night and Tuesday morning, or 124 00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:19,035 Speaker 1: another bulletin if the Court Documents Access System PACER gets 125 00:08:19,075 --> 00:08:23,515 Speaker 1: plugged back in. Did you ever drive in an AMC 126 00:08:23,715 --> 00:08:27,435 Speaker 1: pacer or drive one yourself? The automobile from American Motors 127 00:08:27,435 --> 00:08:30,675 Speaker 1: in the seventies. My mother had a pacer. She once 128 00:08:30,795 --> 00:08:34,395 Speaker 1: managed to lock herself and my sister out of the 129 00:08:34,435 --> 00:08:37,995 Speaker 1: pacer while it was still running and the keys were 130 00:08:38,035 --> 00:08:41,915 Speaker 1: still in the ignition and they were in the parking 131 00:08:41,955 --> 00:08:47,555 Speaker 1: lot at Yankee Stadium. Why on earth would you give 132 00:08:47,755 --> 00:08:53,715 Speaker 1: a vital court reporting system the same name as that thing? 133 00:09:04,835 --> 00:09:09,755 Speaker 1: Once again, Dementia J. Trump is providing hints and foreshadowings 134 00:09:09,795 --> 00:09:14,395 Speaker 1: and augurs that he is about to finally lose all 135 00:09:14,595 --> 00:09:19,715 Speaker 1: control of his mind. Meanwhile, Jack Smith has clearly graduated 136 00:09:19,715 --> 00:09:22,515 Speaker 1: from demanding that they put a gag order on Trump 137 00:09:22,795 --> 00:09:25,195 Speaker 1: to instead demanding that they put something on him that 138 00:09:25,275 --> 00:09:30,155 Speaker 1: more resembles a Hannibal lecter mask Trump under a gag 139 00:09:30,275 --> 00:09:32,995 Speaker 1: order in a New York courtroom, two violations of which 140 00:09:32,995 --> 00:09:35,235 Speaker 1: have been used to argue for the immediate reinstatement of 141 00:09:35,275 --> 00:09:38,355 Speaker 1: another gag order in a Washington courtroom, a gag order 142 00:09:38,355 --> 00:09:40,795 Speaker 1: which could go back into effect as early as tomorrow. 143 00:09:41,275 --> 00:09:45,915 Speaker 1: Has now attacked the New York judge three separate times online, 144 00:09:46,075 --> 00:09:48,515 Speaker 1: and in one of the attacks, he may have issued 145 00:09:48,595 --> 00:09:53,675 Speaker 1: yet another stochastic call for violence against the judge. Quote. 146 00:09:54,275 --> 00:09:59,075 Speaker 1: This is judicial misconduct coupled with prosecutorial misconduct, and somebody 147 00:09:59,635 --> 00:10:03,515 Speaker 1: from the state of New York must step in and 148 00:10:03,755 --> 00:10:08,715 Speaker 1: stop this co compleet and total miscarriage of justice unquote. 149 00:10:09,115 --> 00:10:13,355 Speaker 1: Because Trump had earlier suggested that New York's governor should 150 00:10:13,475 --> 00:10:17,635 Speaker 1: get involved, and because he capitalized the word state when 151 00:10:17,635 --> 00:10:20,475 Speaker 1: he wrote state of New York, he managed to keep 152 00:10:20,555 --> 00:10:23,395 Speaker 1: one foot in that shadowy region in which he has 153 00:10:23,475 --> 00:10:26,355 Speaker 1: lived his life, and his attorneys could argue that he 154 00:10:26,435 --> 00:10:29,555 Speaker 1: was not asking somebody from the state of New York 155 00:10:29,595 --> 00:10:32,075 Speaker 1: to step in and stop this by attacking somebody like 156 00:10:32,115 --> 00:10:35,955 Speaker 1: the judge or the district attorney or both. But Trump's 157 00:10:36,195 --> 00:10:39,955 Speaker 1: rage inside that New York courtroom this week was worse 158 00:10:39,955 --> 00:10:43,635 Speaker 1: than initially reported. Those inside it with him now say 159 00:10:43,995 --> 00:10:47,275 Speaker 1: he pounded his fist on the defense table and got 160 00:10:47,315 --> 00:10:51,195 Speaker 1: bright red. And perhaps the full measure of how rapidly 161 00:10:51,435 --> 00:10:55,075 Speaker 1: his already minimal self control seems to be cracking was 162 00:10:55,195 --> 00:10:58,995 Speaker 1: underscored just before one pm Eastern yesterday when he attacked 163 00:10:58,995 --> 00:11:01,755 Speaker 1: a reporter, not so much for what she had written, 164 00:11:02,715 --> 00:11:07,555 Speaker 1: but for what she did not write. Quote Maggot Hagerman 165 00:11:08,435 --> 00:11:11,675 Speaker 1: of the failing New York Times wrote almost her entire 166 00:11:11,795 --> 00:11:15,915 Speaker 1: fake story today about the Trump hating judges gag order 167 00:11:16,195 --> 00:11:20,195 Speaker 1: they love to silence me, rather than the racist attorney general, 168 00:11:20,275 --> 00:11:25,235 Speaker 1: star witness choking like a dog on the witness stand, 169 00:11:25,715 --> 00:11:32,235 Speaker 1: Perry Mason. There is so much ass in that sentence 170 00:11:32,635 --> 00:11:35,675 Speaker 1: that it is hard to sort it all out. But 171 00:11:35,755 --> 00:11:38,475 Speaker 1: from a psychological viewpoint, there is little that could be 172 00:11:38,595 --> 00:11:41,835 Speaker 1: ever more telling than Trump attacking a writer who has 173 00:11:41,915 --> 00:11:46,915 Speaker 1: often been, even post coup, astonishingly deferential to him, and 174 00:11:46,955 --> 00:11:51,835 Speaker 1: who has been brutally attacked, including by me here metaphorically speaking, 175 00:11:51,915 --> 00:11:56,395 Speaker 1: of course, for being so deferential to him. Moreover, the 176 00:11:56,555 --> 00:11:58,795 Speaker 1: article that drove him to this most insane of a 177 00:11:58,835 --> 00:12:04,195 Speaker 1: series of insane posts is pretty dull, pretty even handed, 178 00:12:04,795 --> 00:12:09,395 Speaker 1: pretty hard to criticize. Any Trumpist who actually bothered to 179 00:12:09,515 --> 00:12:13,035 Speaker 1: read Maggie Haberman's piece in The New York Times yesterday 180 00:12:13,075 --> 00:12:16,395 Speaker 1: would be hard pressed to figure out why Trump would 181 00:12:16,435 --> 00:12:21,235 Speaker 1: have gone so crazy. And that's because since the court 182 00:12:21,275 --> 00:12:24,355 Speaker 1: hearings began to dominate his schedule, Trump has ever increasingly 183 00:12:24,395 --> 00:12:27,915 Speaker 1: shown more and more signs of his evil but still 184 00:12:27,995 --> 00:12:32,835 Speaker 1: strategic public pressure against prosecutors and political opponents and others. 185 00:12:33,315 --> 00:12:39,435 Speaker 1: He's shown that that is dissolving into pure petulance, maggot, 186 00:12:40,395 --> 00:12:45,115 Speaker 1: and then calling Haberman Hagerman on I guess the premise 187 00:12:45,195 --> 00:12:48,355 Speaker 1: that's substituting a G for the B in her name 188 00:12:48,715 --> 00:12:54,275 Speaker 1: means we're supposed to pronounce that hag The parenthetical reference 189 00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:57,675 Speaker 1: to Perry Mason in there, that's a callback to an 190 00:12:57,715 --> 00:13:02,155 Speaker 1: earlier post, ten or twenty posts before, and anyway, it's 191 00:13:02,155 --> 00:13:04,235 Speaker 1: a reference to a television show that had its last 192 00:13:04,275 --> 00:13:09,515 Speaker 1: special episode on April tenth, nineteen ninety five. The reference 193 00:13:09,555 --> 00:13:13,875 Speaker 1: to the star witness choking because he doesn't know how 194 00:13:13,875 --> 00:13:19,915 Speaker 1: to spell choking. These are easy tells, clear signs of 195 00:13:19,995 --> 00:13:25,115 Speaker 1: Trump under stress, and the real tell is in the 196 00:13:25,155 --> 00:13:28,635 Speaker 1: phrase that should have read choking like a dog. That 197 00:13:28,795 --> 00:13:31,715 Speaker 1: is the second reference in twelve hours to dogs doing 198 00:13:31,755 --> 00:13:35,435 Speaker 1: things dogs don't do choking. The other one is lying. 199 00:13:36,355 --> 00:13:39,795 Speaker 1: Trump has a fraud relationship with canine analogies. In the 200 00:13:39,835 --> 00:13:42,835 Speaker 1: stress of the twenty sixteen campaign, at his lowest moments, 201 00:13:42,875 --> 00:13:44,555 Speaker 1: when it looked as if he would lose by ten 202 00:13:44,595 --> 00:13:47,355 Speaker 1: points or perhaps be replaced on the ticket in a 203 00:13:47,395 --> 00:13:51,275 Speaker 1: special maneuver by the Republican Party, he repeatedly made references 204 00:13:51,315 --> 00:13:55,635 Speaker 1: to people being fired like a dog, or thrown off 205 00:13:55,755 --> 00:13:59,795 Speaker 1: TV like a dog, or begging for money like a dog. 206 00:14:00,315 --> 00:14:02,835 Speaker 1: And he made these references with the confidence of a 207 00:14:02,915 --> 00:14:07,555 Speaker 1: moron speaking a languae whige, a foreign language. He doesn't 208 00:14:07,595 --> 00:14:12,075 Speaker 1: really understand. The next dog I see begging for money 209 00:14:12,075 --> 00:14:14,995 Speaker 1: will be the first in the history of the planet. 210 00:14:15,635 --> 00:14:17,715 Speaker 1: More on this shortly, but back to the main point. 211 00:14:18,675 --> 00:14:23,515 Speaker 1: Trump just threw some more chaff submarine countermeasures into this mix. 212 00:14:23,715 --> 00:14:26,235 Speaker 1: His lawyers last night filed a motion that he is 213 00:14:26,315 --> 00:14:30,635 Speaker 1: not guilty of elections subversion because there are classified government 214 00:14:30,675 --> 00:14:34,195 Speaker 1: assessments that he's going to produce at trial quote relating 215 00:14:34,235 --> 00:14:38,555 Speaker 1: to foreign influence activities that impacted the twenty sixteen and 216 00:14:38,675 --> 00:14:42,395 Speaker 1: twenty twenty election, to establish that he acted at all 217 00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:45,075 Speaker 1: times in good faith and on the belief that he 218 00:14:45,195 --> 00:14:49,115 Speaker 1: was doing what he had been elected to do, which 219 00:14:49,155 --> 00:14:52,035 Speaker 1: I guess means he's going to call as a surprise 220 00:14:52,155 --> 00:14:58,555 Speaker 1: witness Q. While Judge Tanya Chutkin deals with this nonsense, 221 00:14:58,595 --> 00:15:01,595 Speaker 1: I am still unconvinced that either she or Judge Arthur 222 00:15:01,635 --> 00:15:05,355 Speaker 1: Engern will actually jail Trump for violating gag orders, although 223 00:15:05,395 --> 00:15:08,075 Speaker 1: my hopes for chut Can are significantly higher. But I 224 00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:11,875 Speaker 1: am just as firmly convinced that that is exactly what 225 00:15:11,995 --> 00:15:15,355 Speaker 1: Jack Smith and his team of prosecutors in the federal 226 00:15:15,395 --> 00:15:20,915 Speaker 1: election subversion case are now pushing for. Trump's ambulance. Chasers 227 00:15:21,315 --> 00:15:23,795 Speaker 1: appealed the chut Can gag order to a different court 228 00:15:23,875 --> 00:15:27,355 Speaker 1: at As Judges do. Chutkin gave him a temporary suspension 229 00:15:27,395 --> 00:15:30,435 Speaker 1: of that gag order. His attorneys then immediately asked for 230 00:15:30,475 --> 00:15:34,035 Speaker 1: an even longer suspension. The Office of the Special Council 231 00:15:34,355 --> 00:15:38,355 Speaker 1: replied late Wednesday night early Yesterday morning, demanding that Trump 232 00:15:38,395 --> 00:15:43,075 Speaker 1: be regagged immediately, and Trump's lawyers, you know, the future 233 00:15:43,195 --> 00:15:46,515 Speaker 1: witnesses against him in some other courtroom, and the jurisdiction 234 00:15:46,675 --> 00:15:50,195 Speaker 1: far far away. They had till Saturday morning to reply. 235 00:15:51,355 --> 00:15:54,835 Speaker 1: The focus of the Smith argument is obviously Trump's all 236 00:15:54,915 --> 00:16:00,595 Speaker 1: purpose posts about Mark Meadows, part insult, part dismissal, part 237 00:16:00,755 --> 00:16:04,995 Speaker 1: not at all veiled threat, but most importantly dove tailing 238 00:16:05,075 --> 00:16:07,595 Speaker 1: with the argument Smith and his group have repeatedly made 239 00:16:07,635 --> 00:16:11,995 Speaker 1: to Judge Chutkin. It contained not just intimidation of a witness. 240 00:16:12,435 --> 00:16:15,755 Speaker 1: It contained an attempt to poison the jury pool by 241 00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:21,235 Speaker 1: impeaching a witness and insisting the prosecution was corrupt to 242 00:16:21,435 --> 00:16:26,715 Speaker 1: quote that Smith filing. The defendants targeting included insinuating that 243 00:16:26,755 --> 00:16:29,475 Speaker 1: if the reporting were true, the chief of staff had 244 00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:32,955 Speaker 1: lied and had been coerced, and the defendants sent a 245 00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:36,795 Speaker 1: clear public message to the chief of staff intended to 246 00:16:36,835 --> 00:16:42,475 Speaker 1: intimidate him. And then in the footnotes, the ghostbuster streams 247 00:16:42,675 --> 00:16:47,795 Speaker 1: crossed the bid to restart the Washington gag, cited Trump's 248 00:16:47,875 --> 00:16:52,275 Speaker 1: ignoring of the New York gag. Quote. Defense counsel also 249 00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:55,275 Speaker 1: assured the court that the defendant's post targeting the court 250 00:16:55,355 --> 00:16:58,435 Speaker 1: staffer had been quote dealt with by the court in 251 00:16:58,555 --> 00:17:05,635 Speaker 1: New York, that assurance turned out to be mistaken. Unquote here, 252 00:17:05,795 --> 00:17:09,955 Speaker 1: the word mistaken is a very, very polite euphemism. The 253 00:17:09,995 --> 00:17:12,355 Speaker 1: rest of the filing shows that Trump ignored the New 254 00:17:12,435 --> 00:17:15,755 Speaker 1: York gag order, ignored it a second time, was called 255 00:17:15,755 --> 00:17:18,675 Speaker 1: to the witness stand to explain what he said, lied 256 00:17:18,755 --> 00:17:22,275 Speaker 1: about what he said, perjured himself, and has proven to 257 00:17:22,315 --> 00:17:27,075 Speaker 1: be unrestrainable even with the gag order as presently constituted. 258 00:17:28,115 --> 00:17:30,955 Speaker 1: What Jack Smith and his staff are setting up is 259 00:17:30,995 --> 00:17:33,875 Speaker 1: something stronger. As I said earlier, it is less a 260 00:17:33,915 --> 00:17:37,235 Speaker 1: gag order than it is a Hannibal Lecter mask. Here, 261 00:17:37,875 --> 00:17:41,755 Speaker 1: they write, the defendant has capitalized on the court's administrative 262 00:17:41,795 --> 00:17:46,435 Speaker 1: stay to, among other prejudicial conduct, send an unmistakable and 263 00:17:46,515 --> 00:17:50,675 Speaker 1: threatening message to a foreseeable witness. In this case, unless 264 00:17:50,675 --> 00:17:54,115 Speaker 1: the court lifts the administrative stay, the defendant will not 265 00:17:54,315 --> 00:17:58,315 Speaker 1: stop his harmful and prejudicial attacks. In addition, to the 266 00:17:58,355 --> 00:18:02,115 Speaker 1: extent that the defendant's public message directed to Mark Meadows, 267 00:18:02,475 --> 00:18:05,395 Speaker 1: with knowledge that it would reach him, is not already 268 00:18:05,475 --> 00:18:09,715 Speaker 1: covered by his release conditions, it is an intentional end 269 00:18:09,875 --> 00:18:13,635 Speaker 1: run around them. On quote, let me translate that. In 270 00:18:13,715 --> 00:18:16,635 Speaker 1: other words, Jack Smith is not telling the judge that 271 00:18:16,715 --> 00:18:20,075 Speaker 1: Trump has violated her gag order. He is telling the 272 00:18:20,155 --> 00:18:25,235 Speaker 1: judge that Trump has violated the original conditions under which 273 00:18:25,435 --> 00:18:29,675 Speaker 1: she did not jail him until the trial starts. To 274 00:18:29,795 --> 00:18:34,275 Speaker 1: resume the quote. Accordingly, the court should modify the defendant's 275 00:18:34,315 --> 00:18:38,755 Speaker 1: conditions of release by making compliance with the order a condition, 276 00:18:39,755 --> 00:18:44,115 Speaker 1: or by clarifying that the existing condition barring communication with 277 00:18:44,235 --> 00:18:48,995 Speaker 1: witnesses about the facts of the case includes indirect messages 278 00:18:49,195 --> 00:18:55,555 Speaker 1: made publicly on social media or in speeches. Again, in short, 279 00:18:56,435 --> 00:19:02,635 Speaker 1: a mask over his face and a straight jacket legally anyway, 280 00:19:03,195 --> 00:19:06,755 Speaker 1: I'm afraid Trump in a a real mask and a 281 00:19:06,915 --> 00:19:13,755 Speaker 1: real straight jacket is just too much to hope for 282 00:19:13,755 --> 00:19:20,315 Speaker 1: for now. The quick follow up now on this the 283 00:19:20,355 --> 00:19:22,955 Speaker 1: second full day of the reign of Speaker Mike Johnson. 284 00:19:23,355 --> 00:19:26,035 Speaker 1: For a man who spent twenty years advocating for sending 285 00:19:26,075 --> 00:19:29,435 Speaker 1: gay people to prison for having sex, advocating for sending 286 00:19:29,515 --> 00:19:33,515 Speaker 1: doctors to prison for providing family planning for women, advocating 287 00:19:33,555 --> 00:19:37,755 Speaker 1: for a national abortion ban, advocating for fewer laws against guns, 288 00:19:38,115 --> 00:19:42,275 Speaker 1: advocating for more laws against divorce, advocating for gutting the 289 00:19:42,435 --> 00:19:48,155 Speaker 1: entire social safety net, advocating for disenfranchising minorities and entire states, 290 00:19:48,675 --> 00:19:53,235 Speaker 1: advocating for using the Constitution to destroy the Constitution, advocating 291 00:19:53,235 --> 00:19:56,595 Speaker 1: for the forced conflation of church and state, advocating for 292 00:19:56,635 --> 00:19:59,475 Speaker 1: a conservative group that makes its employees swear an oath 293 00:19:59,515 --> 00:20:05,915 Speaker 1: to Jesus, advocating against transgenderism, advocating against men wearing women's clothes, 294 00:20:06,155 --> 00:20:11,395 Speaker 1: advocating against women wearing men's clothes, advocating restrictions against Muslims, 295 00:20:11,595 --> 00:20:16,475 Speaker 1: advocating against federal disaster relief, advocating for more oil and gas, 296 00:20:16,475 --> 00:20:18,635 Speaker 1: and against science that has proved we're all going to 297 00:20:18,675 --> 00:20:22,075 Speaker 1: get killed by more oil and gas. Advocating for that 298 00:20:22,195 --> 00:20:25,155 Speaker 1: idiot Amy Cony Barrett since he met her in nineteen 299 00:20:25,195 --> 00:20:28,235 Speaker 1: eighty eight, advocating for a limit of three terms in 300 00:20:28,275 --> 00:20:31,435 Speaker 1: the House and then running for this term his fourth term, 301 00:20:31,915 --> 00:20:35,475 Speaker 1: and advocating for the overthrow of the duly elected government 302 00:20:35,555 --> 00:20:38,035 Speaker 1: of the United States throughout the end of twenty twenty 303 00:20:38,155 --> 00:20:40,675 Speaker 1: and the beginning of twenty twenty one. For a guy 304 00:20:41,275 --> 00:20:45,395 Speaker 1: who has done nothing but comment on everything all the 305 00:20:45,475 --> 00:20:50,915 Speaker 1: time and has always been wrong so far, Mike Johnson 306 00:20:51,035 --> 00:20:55,595 Speaker 1: sure has been Speaker of the House. Mister no comment 307 00:20:56,075 --> 00:21:00,435 Speaker 1: can you clarify your sana and his brief view twenty 308 00:21:00,475 --> 00:21:05,235 Speaker 1: twenty election was stolen surgist, yes or no? Just for 309 00:21:05,275 --> 00:21:12,675 Speaker 1: the record service, do you in trust his excuse me? 310 00:21:12,835 --> 00:21:15,875 Speaker 2: Do you sent to pursue a national abortion man as. 311 00:21:15,795 --> 00:21:23,155 Speaker 1: Speaker sir in your you know you're gonna have to 312 00:21:23,195 --> 00:21:31,515 Speaker 1: say something sometime soon. Sparky two other Johnson notes Echelon 313 00:21:31,715 --> 00:21:35,355 Speaker 1: Insights not exactly a liberal outfit. Did a crash poll 314 00:21:35,475 --> 00:21:38,555 Speaker 1: on public reaction to the News Speaker five hundred and 315 00:21:38,595 --> 00:21:42,675 Speaker 1: ninety four US adults. They say favorable thirty one percent, 316 00:21:43,115 --> 00:21:46,715 Speaker 1: unfavorable fifteen percent, heard of him but have no opinion 317 00:21:46,995 --> 00:21:50,275 Speaker 1: twenty one percent. But the big winner is never heard 318 00:21:50,315 --> 00:21:55,275 Speaker 1: of him thirty four percent. Compare this to Congressman Ted 319 00:21:55,355 --> 00:22:01,115 Speaker 1: Jones favorable eighteen percent, unfavorable, just twelve percent heard of 320 00:22:01,195 --> 00:22:03,995 Speaker 1: him but have no opinion nineteen percent. That is a 321 00:22:04,035 --> 00:22:07,075 Speaker 1: statistical tie with Speaker Johnson, and again the big winner 322 00:22:07,075 --> 00:22:10,755 Speaker 1: for Congressman Ted Jones never heard of him fifty one percent. 323 00:22:12,435 --> 00:22:17,115 Speaker 1: There is no Congressman Ted Jones, the news Speaker of 324 00:22:17,115 --> 00:22:21,075 Speaker 1: the House, the leader of the Republicans in Congress. He's 325 00:22:21,115 --> 00:22:27,555 Speaker 1: doing slightly better than an imaginary congressman, and lastly from 326 00:22:27,595 --> 00:22:29,915 Speaker 1: the House. I am stealing this joke from Twitter user 327 00:22:30,035 --> 00:22:35,395 Speaker 1: your Canadian girlfriend at your Canadian GF. Representative Lauren Bobert 328 00:22:35,435 --> 00:22:38,355 Speaker 1: tweeted a photo of herself wearing too much makeup on 329 00:22:38,435 --> 00:22:43,395 Speaker 1: the packed House floor, beaming alongside Speaker Johnson. Congratulations on 330 00:22:43,435 --> 00:22:46,315 Speaker 1: becoming the next Speaker of the United States House of Representatives. 331 00:22:46,435 --> 00:22:48,835 Speaker 1: You assume office at a critical time for our nation. 332 00:22:49,155 --> 00:22:52,755 Speaker 1: Pray the Lord guides you. Blah blah blah blah blah, 333 00:22:53,395 --> 00:22:58,955 Speaker 1: to which your Canadian girlfriend observes quote not the first 334 00:22:58,995 --> 00:23:07,675 Speaker 1: time she stroked a Johnson in a crowded room. Wow, 335 00:23:08,955 --> 00:23:12,515 Speaker 1: and now is referenced earlier. Since the subject is topical 336 00:23:12,875 --> 00:23:17,595 Speaker 1: and podcasts can be infinity long. This is an all 337 00:23:17,635 --> 00:23:19,835 Speaker 1: new episode, by the way, including a Thurber story I 338 00:23:19,875 --> 00:23:22,795 Speaker 1: have not read you previously, plus sports plus Worst Persons, 339 00:23:22,795 --> 00:23:25,155 Speaker 1: which is mostly about the main shooting and how we 340 00:23:25,155 --> 00:23:28,435 Speaker 1: should name these shootings after the politicians who have enabled them. 341 00:23:29,435 --> 00:23:31,755 Speaker 1: Since the subject is still front of mind, let me 342 00:23:31,795 --> 00:23:35,835 Speaker 1: repeat what I first analyzed on October three, twenty sixteen. 343 00:23:36,635 --> 00:23:42,475 Speaker 1: This insane the word is meant literally, this insane inability 344 00:23:42,475 --> 00:23:45,555 Speaker 1: of dementia Jay Trump to process the concept of dogs. 345 00:23:46,515 --> 00:23:49,555 Speaker 1: When he talks about dogs, he clearly is unaware that 346 00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:54,115 Speaker 1: anybody likes dogs. When he analogizes with dogs, he says 347 00:23:54,115 --> 00:23:56,755 Speaker 1: things that make less sense than usual, even for him. 348 00:23:57,555 --> 00:24:02,595 Speaker 1: When he invokes dogs, something fragile in his brain is barking. 349 00:24:03,395 --> 00:24:05,795 Speaker 1: It is saying to us, it is close to the 350 00:24:05,835 --> 00:24:09,995 Speaker 1: breaking point, and we are here again, as we were 351 00:24:10,075 --> 00:24:14,355 Speaker 1: seven years ago this month when I first said this quote. 352 00:24:14,635 --> 00:24:18,235 Speaker 1: Until one has loved an animal, wrote the journalist and 353 00:24:18,275 --> 00:24:23,395 Speaker 1: author Anatole France, a part of one's soul remains unawakened. 354 00:24:24,635 --> 00:24:28,555 Speaker 1: There is no evidence Donald Trump has ever loved an animal. 355 00:24:29,555 --> 00:24:31,595 Speaker 1: If Trump has ever in his life had a pet, 356 00:24:31,635 --> 00:24:34,195 Speaker 1: wrote Gail Collins of The New York Times, his campaign 357 00:24:34,275 --> 00:24:37,275 Speaker 1: doesn't know about it. There's some question, in fact about 358 00:24:37,275 --> 00:24:42,115 Speaker 1: whether he's even had an animal friend. In fact, none 359 00:24:42,115 --> 00:24:44,475 Speaker 1: of the books about Trump, including his own, refer to 360 00:24:44,515 --> 00:24:47,875 Speaker 1: a pet dog. The co author or ghostwriter of the 361 00:24:47,955 --> 00:24:50,675 Speaker 1: Art of the Deal, Tony Schwartz, told me he never 362 00:24:50,715 --> 00:24:55,235 Speaker 1: heard Trump reference a pet as adult or child. Google it, 363 00:24:55,435 --> 00:24:58,395 Speaker 1: fact check it, do a nexus Lexis search on it, 364 00:24:58,435 --> 00:25:02,275 Speaker 1: and you come up blank. Save for an apparently apocryphal 365 00:25:02,355 --> 00:25:06,155 Speaker 1: story about him. Tweeting asking for prayers for a labrador 366 00:25:06,315 --> 00:25:10,715 Speaker 1: named Spinny. There were no tweets, no entreaties, and for 367 00:25:10,795 --> 00:25:14,635 Speaker 1: all we can determine, no Spinny. A man running to 368 00:25:14,675 --> 00:25:17,075 Speaker 1: lead a nation of three hundred and twenty four million people, 369 00:25:17,075 --> 00:25:19,115 Speaker 1: and while we're at it, seventy eight million dogs and 370 00:25:19,195 --> 00:25:22,155 Speaker 1: seventy six million cats. And there are solid reasons to 371 00:25:22,155 --> 00:25:27,075 Speaker 1: believe he has never had a dog. But it's worse 372 00:25:27,155 --> 00:25:31,915 Speaker 1: than just that, isn't it. Quote July twenty fifteen. I 373 00:25:31,995 --> 00:25:35,115 Speaker 1: hear that sleepy eyes Chuck Todd will be fired like 374 00:25:35,155 --> 00:25:39,355 Speaker 1: a dog. October twenty fifteen. Wow, great news. I hear 375 00:25:39,555 --> 00:25:42,195 Speaker 1: Eric Erickson of Red State was fired like a dog. 376 00:25:42,955 --> 00:25:46,915 Speaker 1: December twenty fifteen. Glenn Beck got fired like a dog. 377 00:25:47,635 --> 00:25:51,195 Speaker 1: January twenty sixteen. Union leader refuses to comment as to 378 00:25:51,235 --> 00:25:53,315 Speaker 1: why they were kicked out of the ABC News debate 379 00:25:53,595 --> 00:25:57,475 Speaker 1: like a dog. Twelve days later, Brent Bozell, one of 380 00:25:57,475 --> 00:26:00,475 Speaker 1: the National Review lightweights, came to my office begging for 381 00:26:00,555 --> 00:26:05,955 Speaker 1: money like a dog. Huh when was the last time 382 00:26:05,955 --> 00:26:10,595 Speaker 1: he saw a dog begging for money in somebody's office? 383 00:26:11,715 --> 00:26:16,075 Speaker 1: February twenty sixteen. Wow, was Ted Cruz disloyal to his 384 00:26:16,195 --> 00:26:19,595 Speaker 1: very capable director of communication. He used him as a scapegoat. 385 00:26:20,075 --> 00:26:22,955 Speaker 1: Fired like a dog, all right? Which is it a 386 00:26:22,995 --> 00:26:26,795 Speaker 1: go to her dog? March twenty sixteen, Eric Erickson again 387 00:26:27,195 --> 00:26:30,035 Speaker 1: got fired like a dog from Red State. Eleven days 388 00:26:30,035 --> 00:26:32,995 Speaker 1: after that, David Gregory got thrown off of TV by NBC, 389 00:26:33,195 --> 00:26:36,595 Speaker 1: Fired like a dog. June twenty sixteen, Mitt Romney had 390 00:26:36,595 --> 00:26:38,915 Speaker 1: his chance to beat a failed president, but he choked 391 00:26:38,955 --> 00:26:43,315 Speaker 1: like a dog. What the hell is wrong with this 392 00:26:43,355 --> 00:26:48,075 Speaker 1: guy about dogs? Fired like a dog? Have you ever 393 00:26:48,195 --> 00:26:53,715 Speaker 1: fired a dog? He's also tweeted that the Egyptian president 394 00:26:53,795 --> 00:26:57,195 Speaker 1: Mubarik was dropped like a dog, that Reverend Jeremiah Wright 395 00:26:57,275 --> 00:26:59,595 Speaker 1: was dumped like a dog, that Mark Cuban was thrown 396 00:26:59,635 --> 00:27:03,115 Speaker 1: off television like a dog, that Kristen Stewart cheated on 397 00:27:03,235 --> 00:27:06,915 Speaker 1: Robert Pattinson like a do And worst of all, he 398 00:27:06,995 --> 00:27:10,035 Speaker 1: said that during a Republican debate he saw Senator Marco 399 00:27:10,155 --> 00:27:16,115 Speaker 1: Rubio sweating like a dog. Dogs don't sweat. In theory, 400 00:27:16,875 --> 00:27:20,035 Speaker 1: they could get fired, they could get cheated on, they 401 00:27:20,035 --> 00:27:23,555 Speaker 1: could beg for money, or they could get dropped, dumped, 402 00:27:23,675 --> 00:27:28,515 Speaker 1: kicked out, or thrown off television. But physically they cannot sweat. 403 00:27:29,155 --> 00:27:32,275 Speaker 1: Donald Trump has no knowledge of this, no understanding of this. 404 00:27:34,035 --> 00:27:36,435 Speaker 1: There's no evidence that he's ever had a dog, no 405 00:27:36,515 --> 00:27:40,315 Speaker 1: evidence he understands even the kinds of basics that people 406 00:27:40,355 --> 00:27:44,955 Speaker 1: who do not have dogs still know about dogs. What 407 00:27:44,995 --> 00:27:49,515 Speaker 1: the hell is he for, Mars? If so, could he 408 00:27:49,595 --> 00:27:56,275 Speaker 1: go back and I'll add in twenty sixteen when he 409 00:27:56,315 --> 00:28:01,155 Speaker 1: said Romney choked like a dog, unlike this week about 410 00:28:01,195 --> 00:28:10,115 Speaker 1: Michael Cohen. In twenty sixteen, Trump's belled choked correctly naming 411 00:28:10,155 --> 00:28:13,995 Speaker 1: the mass shootings after people like, say Senator Susan Collins. 412 00:28:14,355 --> 00:28:20,475 Speaker 2: That's next. This is countdown. This is Countdown with Keith Olberman. 413 00:28:32,755 --> 00:28:39,195 Speaker 2: This is Sports Center. Wait, check that not anymore. This 414 00:28:40,035 --> 00:28:43,715 Speaker 2: is Countdown with Keith Olberman. 415 00:28:43,955 --> 00:28:50,235 Speaker 1: In Sports World Series starts tonight, the team tied for 416 00:28:50,275 --> 00:28:54,915 Speaker 1: the seventh best record in the game, the Texas Rangers, 417 00:28:55,355 --> 00:28:59,395 Speaker 1: hosting the team with the twelfth best record in the game, 418 00:28:59,915 --> 00:29:05,115 Speaker 1: the Arizona Diamondbacks. Baseball has managed to develop a layoff 419 00:29:05,195 --> 00:29:09,515 Speaker 1: system in which ten of the eleven best teams in 420 00:29:09,595 --> 00:29:16,195 Speaker 1: the regular season can be eliminated. Sadly, the teams taking 421 00:29:16,235 --> 00:29:19,475 Speaker 1: the field Arizona and Texas, they are not the best 422 00:29:19,515 --> 00:29:22,315 Speaker 1: teams in the game. Or in either league. I do 423 00:29:22,395 --> 00:29:26,075 Speaker 1: not know what they are playing for anymore. The whole 424 00:29:26,075 --> 00:29:46,795 Speaker 1: thing is just a really sad lie now, thank you, 425 00:29:46,915 --> 00:29:50,875 Speaker 1: Nancy Faust. Just to make it worse, the Arizona Diamondbacks 426 00:29:50,875 --> 00:29:53,595 Speaker 1: are expected to become the first team to despoil the 427 00:29:53,635 --> 00:29:58,995 Speaker 1: World Series by wearing uniforms with advertising patches on the sleeves. 428 00:29:59,675 --> 00:30:02,715 Speaker 1: And if you're the advertiser, you should be asking for 429 00:30:02,755 --> 00:30:05,595 Speaker 1: your money back because as which as I know, I 430 00:30:05,715 --> 00:30:10,075 Speaker 1: sound like the captain of team old man yells at cloud. Hey, 431 00:30:10,115 --> 00:30:12,875 Speaker 1: you kids, get off my lawn. I'm gonna go back 432 00:30:12,875 --> 00:30:15,235 Speaker 1: to my prediction. Way. Do you see how many people 433 00:30:15,355 --> 00:30:19,875 Speaker 1: do not watch this World Series nationally? The series has 434 00:30:19,915 --> 00:30:23,635 Speaker 1: only once dipped below ten million viewers per game. That 435 00:30:23,755 --> 00:30:26,235 Speaker 1: was in the COVID season the token World Series of 436 00:30:26,275 --> 00:30:30,275 Speaker 1: twenty twenty. The peak was forty four million viewers per 437 00:30:30,315 --> 00:30:33,715 Speaker 1: game for the Yankees and Dodgers. In nineteen seventy eight. Yes, 438 00:30:33,835 --> 00:30:38,115 Speaker 1: a different entertainment world, there were only three TV networks. 439 00:30:38,435 --> 00:30:40,755 Speaker 1: On the other hand, the population was thirty three percent 440 00:30:40,835 --> 00:30:44,555 Speaker 1: smaller than it is now. Guess which one of those numbers, 441 00:30:44,595 --> 00:30:47,875 Speaker 1: ten million or forty four million a game? This series 442 00:30:47,915 --> 00:30:50,835 Speaker 1: is going to come closer to They have reduced the 443 00:30:50,875 --> 00:30:54,435 Speaker 1: World Series to this simple formula. Is my team playing 444 00:30:55,315 --> 00:31:01,155 Speaker 1: no see an x spring? Who would have ever thought this? 445 00:31:01,595 --> 00:31:04,395 Speaker 1: As gambling sites become one of the leading advertisers, maybe 446 00:31:04,435 --> 00:31:07,715 Speaker 1: the leading advertisers in all of sports. A pro athlete 447 00:31:07,755 --> 00:31:11,275 Speaker 1: has been suspended for violating his league's rules against gambling 448 00:31:11,315 --> 00:31:16,795 Speaker 1: on sports. I know a shock. Shane Pinto of hockey's 449 00:31:16,795 --> 00:31:19,955 Speaker 1: Ottawa Senators will sit for forty one games after one 450 00:31:19,955 --> 00:31:22,875 Speaker 1: of the sites reported to the NHL that he had 451 00:31:22,875 --> 00:31:26,115 Speaker 1: a gambling account with them. There is some evidence that 452 00:31:26,195 --> 00:31:29,315 Speaker 1: Pinto did not actually do the gambling in question, but 453 00:31:29,395 --> 00:31:33,395 Speaker 1: somebody else was using his account improperly and talk about 454 00:31:33,395 --> 00:31:35,635 Speaker 1: the chickens coming home to roost. The first hockey team 455 00:31:35,675 --> 00:31:38,075 Speaker 1: to have put an ad on its helmets for a 456 00:31:38,115 --> 00:31:43,035 Speaker 1: gambling site yep, Pinto's Ottawa Senators, and the worst on 457 00:31:43,115 --> 00:31:47,675 Speaker 1: this is clearly yet to come. Lastly, also on uniforms, 458 00:31:47,835 --> 00:31:51,355 Speaker 1: Brilliance from the British soccer club Tottenham Hotspur. It has 459 00:31:51,435 --> 00:31:54,595 Speaker 1: carefully researched the eight hundred and seventy nine different players 460 00:31:54,595 --> 00:31:57,435 Speaker 1: who performed for the team since it began play in 461 00:31:57,515 --> 00:32:01,675 Speaker 1: eighteen ninety four. It has determined in which order they debuted, 462 00:32:02,115 --> 00:32:06,315 Speaker 1: and it has now assigned each of them legacy number. 463 00:32:06,675 --> 00:32:10,755 Speaker 1: Stanley Briggs, center half of their first eighteen ninety four 464 00:32:10,835 --> 00:32:15,515 Speaker 1: Spurs team, is number one, and Alejo Vliz, who just 465 00:32:15,595 --> 00:32:18,475 Speaker 1: joined them this year, is number eight seventy nine. So 466 00:32:18,515 --> 00:32:21,355 Speaker 1: when their next new player debuts, there will be a 467 00:32:21,395 --> 00:32:24,475 Speaker 1: small number eight eighty on the back of his jersey 468 00:32:24,715 --> 00:32:29,275 Speaker 1: below the collar. Imagine an American team in any sport 469 00:32:29,395 --> 00:32:32,675 Speaker 1: doing this. It is that rarest of ideas, something that 470 00:32:32,715 --> 00:32:36,435 Speaker 1: actually salutes the players, cherishes the history of the game, 471 00:32:36,835 --> 00:32:39,395 Speaker 1: and lets the team make some more money selling more 472 00:32:39,435 --> 00:32:44,355 Speaker 1: replica uniforms, only maybe leave the ads off them. This 473 00:32:44,515 --> 00:33:08,955 Speaker 1: time still ahead on this all new edition of Countdown 474 00:33:08,995 --> 00:33:11,475 Speaker 1: Fridays with Thurber, and I've never yet met anybody who 475 00:33:11,515 --> 00:33:14,715 Speaker 1: will not shudder with recognition about something in James Herber's 476 00:33:14,795 --> 00:33:20,555 Speaker 1: reminiscences about how he almost did not graduate because of 477 00:33:20,715 --> 00:33:24,715 Speaker 1: science and swimming. The first time I have ever read 478 00:33:24,755 --> 00:33:29,355 Speaker 1: to you University days first time for the daily roundup 479 00:33:29,395 --> 00:33:31,915 Speaker 1: of the misgrants, morons and Dunning Kruger effects specimens who 480 00:33:31,955 --> 00:33:35,355 Speaker 1: constitute today's worst persons in the world. The Bronze President 481 00:33:35,435 --> 00:33:40,275 Speaker 1: Dudah of Poland. The anti fascist candidate Prime Minister Donald 482 00:33:40,355 --> 00:33:45,795 Speaker 1: Tuisk upset the ultranationalist quote Law and Justice Party and 483 00:33:46,035 --> 00:33:49,115 Speaker 1: has the only prospects for forming a coalition to now 484 00:33:49,195 --> 00:33:52,195 Speaker 1: rule the nation. Yet the President has refused to name 485 00:33:52,275 --> 00:33:55,475 Speaker 1: Tusk as prime minister. The President now says he will 486 00:33:55,515 --> 00:33:58,435 Speaker 1: not open parliament until the eleventh of next month, and 487 00:33:58,475 --> 00:34:01,515 Speaker 1: he may not have named prime minister even then. There 488 00:34:01,555 --> 00:34:04,195 Speaker 1: are grim suspicions in Poland that somebody is trying to 489 00:34:04,195 --> 00:34:08,035 Speaker 1: pull up Trump there to reappoint the fascist and then 490 00:34:08,075 --> 00:34:11,715 Speaker 1: either stage violence or create some diversion to keep the 491 00:34:11,795 --> 00:34:16,555 Speaker 1: Democratic Coalition and Tusk out of office. The runner up, 492 00:34:16,595 --> 00:34:19,355 Speaker 1: Mayor Eric Adams of New York. This is not about 493 00:34:19,355 --> 00:34:22,235 Speaker 1: his delusion of being anointed by God. I'm letting that 494 00:34:22,355 --> 00:34:25,635 Speaker 1: pass today. This is about the dangers of e bikes 495 00:34:25,995 --> 00:34:30,275 Speaker 1: in this city or any other city. People have died 496 00:34:30,355 --> 00:34:33,075 Speaker 1: here because the batteries of e bikes have caught fire 497 00:34:33,155 --> 00:34:36,795 Speaker 1: in apartment buildings. People have been grievously wounded here because 498 00:34:36,795 --> 00:34:39,275 Speaker 1: the police do nothing about e bikers riding up on 499 00:34:39,435 --> 00:34:43,435 Speaker 1: sidewalks or ignoring all traffic lights and laws and driving 500 00:34:43,515 --> 00:34:46,235 Speaker 1: in the opposite direction of the traffic and now now 501 00:34:46,275 --> 00:34:49,035 Speaker 1: though they've gone too far. Wednesday night, a friend of 502 00:34:49,075 --> 00:34:52,155 Speaker 1: mine's dog and another dog were being walked on the 503 00:34:52,155 --> 00:34:54,755 Speaker 1: west Side. They were walking east on forty seventh Street 504 00:34:55,155 --> 00:34:59,355 Speaker 1: on the sidewalk, which is for walking out of nowhere. 505 00:34:59,395 --> 00:35:03,115 Speaker 1: An idiot on an e bike on the sidewalk going 506 00:35:03,235 --> 00:35:08,395 Speaker 1: west into them, the walker and the two dogs. Happily, 507 00:35:08,435 --> 00:35:10,675 Speaker 1: the injuries to the dogs and the walker were minor. 508 00:35:11,155 --> 00:35:14,315 Speaker 1: The e biker those swore at them as he drove away, 509 00:35:14,875 --> 00:35:19,595 Speaker 1: and two cops witnessed the entire event and did nothing. 510 00:35:20,835 --> 00:35:23,075 Speaker 1: Maybe the lead story is here. There were two cops 511 00:35:23,115 --> 00:35:27,675 Speaker 1: standing on forty seventh Street alert the media. The nightmare, 512 00:35:27,715 --> 00:35:30,395 Speaker 1: of course, is that e bikes are central to fighting 513 00:35:30,435 --> 00:35:34,795 Speaker 1: climate change, but something like this happens daily here because 514 00:35:34,835 --> 00:35:38,355 Speaker 1: the city is not designed for e bikes or enforcing rules, 515 00:35:39,155 --> 00:35:42,075 Speaker 1: and people are coming to hate e bikes here, and 516 00:35:42,115 --> 00:35:45,555 Speaker 1: the people who drive e bikes here so recklessly that 517 00:35:45,675 --> 00:35:50,035 Speaker 1: when the city acts instead of enforcing regulations against e bikes, 518 00:35:50,595 --> 00:35:53,155 Speaker 1: it's going to have to flat out ban them. So 519 00:35:53,275 --> 00:35:58,475 Speaker 1: these idiots are endangering lives and endangering dogs, and then 520 00:35:58,515 --> 00:36:01,795 Speaker 1: they will endanger lives again by ruining one means we 521 00:36:01,955 --> 00:36:05,955 Speaker 1: have of helping to not extinguish life on the planet. 522 00:36:06,875 --> 00:36:10,835 Speaker 1: Get on this, Mayor Adams, pretend God told you to, 523 00:36:12,755 --> 00:36:15,515 Speaker 1: but our winners, and we will drop the music for this. 524 00:36:16,235 --> 00:36:19,995 Speaker 1: It is a tie. Speaker Mike Johnson, hours after his 525 00:36:20,075 --> 00:36:23,075 Speaker 1: election a mass shooting in Maine, for which he has 526 00:36:23,115 --> 00:36:29,115 Speaker 1: now offered prayers. Johnson voted against background checks, He's voted 527 00:36:29,115 --> 00:36:33,275 Speaker 1: against protecting domestic violence victims from gun possession. He's voted 528 00:36:33,315 --> 00:36:37,795 Speaker 1: against the bipartisan Safer Communities Act. But he had time 529 00:36:37,835 --> 00:36:40,555 Speaker 1: to meet ten days ago in his House office with 530 00:36:40,795 --> 00:36:43,275 Speaker 1: women for gun rights to, as he put it, then 531 00:36:43,635 --> 00:36:48,995 Speaker 1: discuss the safeguarding of our Second Amendment rights. Mister speaker, 532 00:36:49,195 --> 00:36:52,835 Speaker 1: shove your Second Amendment up your ass. It does not 533 00:36:53,115 --> 00:36:56,835 Speaker 1: say anything about ownership of guns. If it did, it 534 00:36:56,835 --> 00:37:00,835 Speaker 1: would have the word own in it, you fatuous Christo 535 00:37:00,995 --> 00:37:05,155 Speaker 1: fascist idiot. I'm going to suggest some thing now that 536 00:37:05,315 --> 00:37:08,835 Speaker 1: might be grotesque. It might be callous, It might hurt 537 00:37:08,955 --> 00:37:12,635 Speaker 1: some of those directly affected by these shootings, or it 538 00:37:12,715 --> 00:37:15,955 Speaker 1: might steer the society out of its spiral towards collective 539 00:37:16,035 --> 00:37:20,435 Speaker 1: suicide by gun. I think we should name each mass 540 00:37:20,555 --> 00:37:26,515 Speaker 1: shooting after a politician who's inactivity, negligence, or acceptance of 541 00:37:26,595 --> 00:37:29,595 Speaker 1: bribes from the NRA has made them at least a 542 00:37:29,715 --> 00:37:33,715 Speaker 1: symbolic accessory before the fact to the latest carnage. I 543 00:37:33,795 --> 00:37:37,195 Speaker 1: think we should not call this one the Lewiston, Maine 544 00:37:37,235 --> 00:37:40,155 Speaker 1: mass shooting. I think we should call this one the 545 00:37:40,235 --> 00:37:46,515 Speaker 1: speaker Mike Johnson mass shooting, or the Senator Susan Collins 546 00:37:46,595 --> 00:37:50,635 Speaker 1: mass shooting. The senator from Maine voted against renewing the 547 00:37:50,675 --> 00:37:53,475 Speaker 1: assault weapons ban, and she voted against the ban on 548 00:37:53,555 --> 00:37:56,875 Speaker 1: high capacity magazines that allow mass shooters to fire their 549 00:37:56,915 --> 00:38:00,195 Speaker 1: weapons of terror even faster. She has contributed to the 550 00:38:00,195 --> 00:38:04,315 Speaker 1: fact that while gutless, heartless Republicans like herself always respond 551 00:38:04,355 --> 00:38:07,795 Speaker 1: to a man shooting like the Speaker Mike Johnson mass 552 00:38:07,795 --> 00:38:12,115 Speaker 1: shooting by invoking mental health. Maine does not have background 553 00:38:12,235 --> 00:38:15,555 Speaker 1: checks on all gun sales, nor a red flag law, 554 00:38:15,835 --> 00:38:18,835 Speaker 1: nor does it stop domestic abusers from getting guns, nor 555 00:38:18,875 --> 00:38:22,355 Speaker 1: does it have a waiting period. Senator Collins has not 556 00:38:22,515 --> 00:38:25,515 Speaker 1: learned her lesson she had the gall to show up 557 00:38:25,515 --> 00:38:29,715 Speaker 1: to a news conference in Lewiston last night. Or we 558 00:38:29,795 --> 00:38:33,075 Speaker 1: could also call this one the Sean Hannity mass shooting. 559 00:38:33,635 --> 00:38:36,955 Speaker 1: A long time ago, I was friendly with this fatuous idiot. 560 00:38:37,355 --> 00:38:40,315 Speaker 1: He used to express bewilderment to me that people took 561 00:38:40,395 --> 00:38:45,795 Speaker 1: what he said or what I said seriously. It's only television. 562 00:38:46,755 --> 00:38:50,235 Speaker 1: At some point though, he started believing his own delusions. 563 00:38:50,755 --> 00:38:55,235 Speaker 1: After the shooting Wednesday night, interviewing Nicky Hayley, well there's 564 00:38:55,235 --> 00:38:59,435 Speaker 1: a combined IQ that's still under one hundred, Hannity actually 565 00:38:59,475 --> 00:39:03,595 Speaker 1: suggested that everybody should have a plan to confront a 566 00:39:03,755 --> 00:39:08,195 Speaker 1: mass shooter. Quote, I have a personal security plan. I 567 00:39:08,395 --> 00:39:13,515 Speaker 1: train in Mick Marshall arch. In other words, Sean Hannity 568 00:39:13,635 --> 00:39:16,675 Speaker 1: thinks this is the matrix and he's going to kick 569 00:39:16,715 --> 00:39:21,075 Speaker 1: the AR fifteen out of the Mike Johnson mass shooter's hands. 570 00:39:22,275 --> 00:39:25,435 Speaker 1: I'm guessing ultimately nobody on the right will do anything 571 00:39:25,475 --> 00:39:29,515 Speaker 1: about any of this until they are literally all standing 572 00:39:29,635 --> 00:39:33,275 Speaker 1: over the body of somebody like Sean Hannity and commenting 573 00:39:33,515 --> 00:39:35,355 Speaker 1: on how it looked like he was in some sort 574 00:39:35,395 --> 00:39:39,155 Speaker 1: of jiu jitsu stance when that guy put the six 575 00:39:39,235 --> 00:39:43,875 Speaker 1: inch diameter bullet hole through him, And maybe even then 576 00:39:43,915 --> 00:39:47,435 Speaker 1: they still won't do anything about it. Speaker Mike Johnson, 577 00:39:48,115 --> 00:39:56,355 Speaker 1: Senator Susan Collins, Sean Hannity useless, wasted human beings, today's 578 00:39:56,355 --> 00:40:06,115 Speaker 1: worst persons in the world. This is thing James Thurber 579 00:40:06,155 --> 00:40:10,075 Speaker 1: ever wrote to a novel, was the story of his childhood, 580 00:40:10,315 --> 00:40:14,715 Speaker 1: somewhat exaggerated, or, according to his family, almost completely exaggerated. 581 00:40:15,155 --> 00:40:18,155 Speaker 1: It was called My Life and hard Times. In it 582 00:40:18,195 --> 00:40:21,675 Speaker 1: are stories like the night the bed fell and such 583 00:40:21,715 --> 00:40:24,995 Speaker 1: as that. But my favorite, perhaps of all of his 584 00:40:25,115 --> 00:40:32,035 Speaker 1: stories from his supposed youth, is called University Days. There's 585 00:40:32,075 --> 00:40:35,515 Speaker 1: a lot of well you'll hear, there's a lot of 586 00:40:35,555 --> 00:40:38,275 Speaker 1: stuff in university Days. And so I presented to you 587 00:40:38,315 --> 00:40:43,875 Speaker 1: for the first time on Fridays with Thurber University Days 588 00:40:44,635 --> 00:40:49,555 Speaker 1: by James Thurber. I've passed all the other courses that 589 00:40:49,595 --> 00:40:53,435 Speaker 1: I took at my university, but I could never pass botany. 590 00:40:54,235 --> 00:40:57,315 Speaker 1: This was because all botany students had to spend several 591 00:40:57,355 --> 00:40:59,835 Speaker 1: hours a week in a laboratory looking through a microscope 592 00:40:59,875 --> 00:41:04,755 Speaker 1: at plant cells, and I could never see through a microscope. 593 00:41:04,835 --> 00:41:09,355 Speaker 1: I never once saw a cell through a microscope. This 594 00:41:09,635 --> 00:41:14,835 Speaker 1: used to enrage my instructor. He would wander around the laboratory, 595 00:41:14,915 --> 00:41:17,595 Speaker 1: please with the progress all the students were making and 596 00:41:17,715 --> 00:41:22,355 Speaker 1: drawing the involved and so I am told interesting structure 597 00:41:22,435 --> 00:41:26,795 Speaker 1: of flower cells until he came to me. I would 598 00:41:26,875 --> 00:41:31,035 Speaker 1: just be standing there. I can't see anything, I would say. 599 00:41:31,875 --> 00:41:35,755 Speaker 1: He would begin patiently enough explaining how anybody can see 600 00:41:35,755 --> 00:41:38,155 Speaker 1: through a microscope, but he would always end up in 601 00:41:38,195 --> 00:41:41,595 Speaker 1: a fury, claiming that I could too see through a microscope, 602 00:41:41,595 --> 00:41:45,395 Speaker 1: but just pretended that I couldn't. It takes away from 603 00:41:45,435 --> 00:41:47,915 Speaker 1: the beauty of flowers anyway. I used to tell him, 604 00:41:48,195 --> 00:41:50,595 Speaker 1: we are not concerned with the beauty in this course. 605 00:41:50,955 --> 00:41:54,595 Speaker 1: He would say, we are concerned solely with what I 606 00:41:54,675 --> 00:42:01,075 Speaker 1: may call the mechanics of flowers. Well, I'd say, I 607 00:42:01,115 --> 00:42:05,435 Speaker 1: can't see anything. Try it just once again, he'd say, 608 00:42:05,795 --> 00:42:07,875 Speaker 1: And I would put my eye to the microscope and 609 00:42:07,955 --> 00:42:11,395 Speaker 1: see nothing at all, except now and again, a nebulous 610 00:42:11,755 --> 00:42:17,755 Speaker 1: milky substance, a phenomenon of maladjustment. You were supposed to 611 00:42:17,755 --> 00:42:21,955 Speaker 1: see a vivid, restless clockwork of sharply defined plant cells. 612 00:42:23,075 --> 00:42:25,315 Speaker 1: I see what looks like a lot of milk. I 613 00:42:25,355 --> 00:42:28,235 Speaker 1: would tell him. This, He claimed was the result of 614 00:42:28,235 --> 00:42:32,075 Speaker 1: my not having adjusted the microscope properly. So he would 615 00:42:32,075 --> 00:42:35,315 Speaker 1: readjust it for me, or rather for himself, and I 616 00:42:35,315 --> 00:42:40,595 Speaker 1: would look again and see milk. I finally took a 617 00:42:40,675 --> 00:42:43,755 Speaker 1: deferred pass as they called it, and waited a year 618 00:42:43,875 --> 00:42:46,995 Speaker 1: and tried again. You had to pass one of the 619 00:42:46,995 --> 00:42:50,915 Speaker 1: biological sciences or you couldn't graduate. The professor had come 620 00:42:50,915 --> 00:42:53,835 Speaker 1: back from vacation brown as a berry, bright eyed, and 621 00:42:53,955 --> 00:42:57,995 Speaker 1: eager to explain cell structure again to his classes. Well, 622 00:42:58,115 --> 00:43:00,075 Speaker 1: he said to me cheerily when we met in the 623 00:43:00,115 --> 00:43:03,955 Speaker 1: laboratory first hour of the semester. We're going to see 624 00:43:03,995 --> 00:43:09,435 Speaker 1: cells this time, aren't we, Yes, sir, I said. Students 625 00:43:09,555 --> 00:43:11,435 Speaker 1: to right of me, and to left of me, and 626 00:43:11,475 --> 00:43:13,755 Speaker 1: in front of me were seeing cells. What's more, they 627 00:43:13,755 --> 00:43:17,275 Speaker 1: were quietly drawing pictures of them in their notebooks. Of course, 628 00:43:17,395 --> 00:43:24,675 Speaker 1: I didn't see anything. We'll try it, the professor said 629 00:43:24,715 --> 00:43:29,235 Speaker 1: to me gently, with every adjustment of the microscope known 630 00:43:29,355 --> 00:43:34,235 Speaker 1: to man. As God is my witness, I'll arrange this 631 00:43:34,395 --> 00:43:38,355 Speaker 1: glass so that you see cells through it, or I'll 632 00:43:38,475 --> 00:43:44,035 Speaker 1: give up teaching in twenty two years of botany. I 633 00:43:46,155 --> 00:43:49,115 Speaker 1: he cut off abruptly, for he was beginning to quiver 634 00:43:49,435 --> 00:43:53,995 Speaker 1: all over like Lionel Barrymore, and he genuinely wished to 635 00:43:54,035 --> 00:43:56,395 Speaker 1: hold on to his temper. His scenes with me had 636 00:43:56,395 --> 00:44:00,355 Speaker 1: taken a great deal out of him. As an editor's 637 00:44:00,395 --> 00:44:03,355 Speaker 1: note here, if you don't recognize the name Lionel Barrymore, 638 00:44:03,675 --> 00:44:06,395 Speaker 1: if you've ever seen the movie It's a Wonderful Life, 639 00:44:07,155 --> 00:44:11,515 Speaker 1: mister Potter, the evil financier in the wheelchair that was 640 00:44:11,555 --> 00:44:16,755 Speaker 1: played by lime old Barrymore, who used to quiver all 641 00:44:16,755 --> 00:44:21,355 Speaker 1: over back to Thurber. So we tried it with every 642 00:44:21,395 --> 00:44:24,635 Speaker 1: adjustment of the microscope known to man. With only one 643 00:44:24,675 --> 00:44:27,435 Speaker 1: of them did I see anything but blackness or the 644 00:44:27,675 --> 00:44:31,635 Speaker 1: familiar lacteal opacity. And that time I saw, to my 645 00:44:31,755 --> 00:44:37,595 Speaker 1: pleasure and amazement, a variegated constellation of flex specks and dots. 646 00:44:38,515 --> 00:44:42,835 Speaker 1: These I hastily drew. The instructor, noting my activity, came 647 00:44:42,875 --> 00:44:45,395 Speaker 1: back from an adjoining desk, a smile on his lips, 648 00:44:45,515 --> 00:44:48,715 Speaker 1: his eyebrows high in hope. He looked at my cell drawing. 649 00:44:49,835 --> 00:44:52,475 Speaker 1: What's that, he demanded, with a hint of squeal in 650 00:44:52,515 --> 00:44:56,075 Speaker 1: his voice. That's what I saw, I said. You didn't, 651 00:44:56,595 --> 00:45:00,595 Speaker 1: You didn't, You didn't, he screamed, losing control of his 652 00:45:00,675 --> 00:45:03,275 Speaker 1: temper instantly, and he bent over and squinted into the 653 00:45:03,275 --> 00:45:09,835 Speaker 1: microscope his head. That's your eye, he shouted. You fix 654 00:45:09,915 --> 00:45:16,075 Speaker 1: the lens so that it reflects you've drawn your eye. 655 00:45:16,875 --> 00:45:20,755 Speaker 1: Another course, that I didn't like, but somehow managed to pass. 656 00:45:21,675 --> 00:45:25,155 Speaker 1: Was economics. I went to that class straight from the 657 00:45:25,155 --> 00:45:29,075 Speaker 1: botany class, which didn't help me any in understanding either subject. 658 00:45:29,435 --> 00:45:32,315 Speaker 1: I used to get them mixed up, but not as 659 00:45:32,355 --> 00:45:35,115 Speaker 1: mixed up as another student in my economics class who 660 00:45:35,195 --> 00:45:38,275 Speaker 1: came there direct from a physics laboratory. He was a 661 00:45:38,315 --> 00:45:42,875 Speaker 1: tackle on the football team named Balentsowitz. At the time, 662 00:45:43,035 --> 00:45:45,595 Speaker 1: Ohio State University had one of the best football teams 663 00:45:45,595 --> 00:45:49,795 Speaker 1: in the country, and Balentsuwitz was one of its outstanding stars. 664 00:45:50,635 --> 00:45:53,195 Speaker 1: In order to be eligible to play, it was necessary 665 00:45:53,235 --> 00:45:56,435 Speaker 1: for him to keep up in his studies, a very 666 00:45:56,955 --> 00:46:00,715 Speaker 1: difficult matter, for while he was not dumber than an ox, 667 00:46:01,675 --> 00:46:06,155 Speaker 1: he was not any smarter. Most of his professors were 668 00:46:06,235 --> 00:46:09,795 Speaker 1: lenient and helped him along. None gave him more hints 669 00:46:09,795 --> 00:46:12,715 Speaker 1: in answering questions or asked him simpler ones than the 670 00:46:12,755 --> 00:46:18,355 Speaker 1: economics professor, a thin, timid man named Bassum. One day, 671 00:46:18,355 --> 00:46:21,115 Speaker 1: when when we were on the subject of transportation and distribution, 672 00:46:21,235 --> 00:46:27,195 Speaker 1: it became Belentsowitz's turn to answer a question. Name one 673 00:46:27,635 --> 00:46:33,195 Speaker 1: means of transportation. The professor said to him, No light 674 00:46:33,355 --> 00:46:38,995 Speaker 1: came into the big tackle's eyes, just any means of transportation, 675 00:46:39,435 --> 00:46:45,675 Speaker 1: said the professor. Bealentswitz sat staring at him. That is, 676 00:46:46,315 --> 00:46:52,155 Speaker 1: pursued the professor any medium agency or method of going 677 00:46:52,235 --> 00:46:58,395 Speaker 1: from one place to another. Blentsowitz had the look of 678 00:46:58,435 --> 00:47:01,555 Speaker 1: a man who is being led into a trap. You 679 00:47:01,635 --> 00:47:06,475 Speaker 1: may choose among steam, horse drawn, or or electrically propelled vehicles, 680 00:47:06,835 --> 00:47:09,915 Speaker 1: said the instructor. I might suggest the one which we 681 00:47:10,035 --> 00:47:17,835 Speaker 1: commonly take in making long journeys across land. There was 682 00:47:17,875 --> 00:47:25,915 Speaker 1: a profound silence in which everybody stirred uneasily, including Balentuwitz 683 00:47:26,115 --> 00:47:32,355 Speaker 1: and mister Bassum. Mister Bassom abruptly broke this silence in 684 00:47:32,395 --> 00:47:39,115 Speaker 1: an amazing manner. Chew, chew, chew, he said in a 685 00:47:39,195 --> 00:47:43,835 Speaker 1: low voice, and turned instantly scarlet. He glanced appealingly around 686 00:47:43,875 --> 00:47:46,235 Speaker 1: the room. All of us, of course, shared mister Bassom's 687 00:47:46,275 --> 00:47:49,355 Speaker 1: desire that Balentulitz would stay abreast of the class in 688 00:47:49,395 --> 00:47:51,675 Speaker 1: economics for the Illinois game, one of the hardest and 689 00:47:51,675 --> 00:47:56,635 Speaker 1: most important the season, was only a week off. Too. Too, too, 690 00:47:57,955 --> 00:48:00,595 Speaker 1: some student with a deep voice moaned, and we all 691 00:48:00,595 --> 00:48:04,915 Speaker 1: looked encouragingly at Balentsuwitz. Somebody else gave a fine miation 692 00:48:04,955 --> 00:48:08,715 Speaker 1: of a locomotive letting off steam. Mister Bassom himself rounded 693 00:48:08,715 --> 00:48:14,875 Speaker 1: off the little shell. Ding Dong, ding dong, ding dong, 694 00:48:15,075 --> 00:48:19,675 Speaker 1: he said hopefully. Balentsowitz was staring at the floor now 695 00:48:20,275 --> 00:48:25,235 Speaker 1: trying to think. His great brow furrowed, his huge hands 696 00:48:25,315 --> 00:48:32,355 Speaker 1: rubbing together, his face red. How did you come to 697 00:48:32,435 --> 00:48:38,715 Speaker 1: college this year, mister Blentowitz, asked the professor. Chuff chuff, chuff, chuff, 698 00:48:38,835 --> 00:48:43,715 Speaker 1: chuff chuff. My father sent me, said the football player. 699 00:48:45,595 --> 00:48:53,075 Speaker 1: What on, asked Bassom, Getting loans, said the tackle in 700 00:48:53,115 --> 00:48:58,275 Speaker 1: a low husky voice, obviously embarrassed. No, no, said Bassim. 701 00:48:58,715 --> 00:49:03,795 Speaker 1: Name a means of transportation? What did you ride here 702 00:49:03,995 --> 00:49:11,635 Speaker 1: on train? Said Bealentsuwitz. Quite right, said the professor. Now, 703 00:49:11,675 --> 00:49:16,555 Speaker 1: mister Nugent, will you tell us if I went through 704 00:49:16,595 --> 00:49:20,435 Speaker 1: anguish in botany and economics for different reasons. Gymnasium work 705 00:49:20,515 --> 00:49:23,115 Speaker 1: was even worse. I don't even like to think about it. 706 00:49:23,475 --> 00:49:25,715 Speaker 1: They wouldn't let you play games or join in the 707 00:49:25,755 --> 00:49:29,515 Speaker 1: exercises with your glasses on, and I couldn't see with 708 00:49:29,595 --> 00:49:35,235 Speaker 1: mine off. I bumped into professors, horizontal bars, agricultural students 709 00:49:35,555 --> 00:49:39,875 Speaker 1: swinging iron rings, not being able to see. I could 710 00:49:39,955 --> 00:49:43,555 Speaker 1: take it, but I couldn't dish it. Out. Also, in 711 00:49:43,675 --> 00:49:46,475 Speaker 1: order to pass gymnasium, and you had to pass it 712 00:49:46,515 --> 00:49:49,435 Speaker 1: to graduate, you had to learn to swim if you 713 00:49:49,475 --> 00:49:53,995 Speaker 1: didn't know how. I didn't like the swimming pool. I 714 00:49:54,035 --> 00:49:57,955 Speaker 1: didn't like swimming, and I didn't like the swimming instructor, 715 00:49:58,475 --> 00:50:03,555 Speaker 1: and after all these years, I still don't. I never swam, 716 00:50:04,155 --> 00:50:06,675 Speaker 1: but I pass asked my gym work anyway by having 717 00:50:06,755 --> 00:50:11,475 Speaker 1: another student give my gymnasium number nine seven eight and 718 00:50:11,595 --> 00:50:14,955 Speaker 1: swim across the pool in my place. He was a quiet, 719 00:50:15,035 --> 00:50:18,555 Speaker 1: amiable blonde youth number four seven three, and he would 720 00:50:18,595 --> 00:50:20,475 Speaker 1: have seen through a microscope before me if we could 721 00:50:20,515 --> 00:50:22,795 Speaker 1: have gotten away with that. But we couldn't get away 722 00:50:22,835 --> 00:50:25,715 Speaker 1: with that. Another thing I didn't like about gymnasium work 723 00:50:25,795 --> 00:50:28,235 Speaker 1: was that they made you strip the day you registered. 724 00:50:28,875 --> 00:50:31,275 Speaker 1: It is impossible for me to be happy when I 725 00:50:31,275 --> 00:50:35,035 Speaker 1: am stripped and being asked a lot of questions. Still 726 00:50:35,715 --> 00:50:38,275 Speaker 1: I did better than a lanky agricultural student who was 727 00:50:38,315 --> 00:50:41,995 Speaker 1: cross examined just before I was. They asked each student 728 00:50:42,075 --> 00:50:45,915 Speaker 1: what college he was in, that is, whether arts, engineering, commerce, 729 00:50:45,995 --> 00:50:50,315 Speaker 1: or agriculture. What college are you in? The instructor snapped 730 00:50:50,315 --> 00:50:53,555 Speaker 1: at the youth in front of me, Ohio State University, 731 00:50:54,115 --> 00:50:59,355 Speaker 1: he said promptly. It wasn't that agricultural student, but it 732 00:50:59,395 --> 00:51:01,515 Speaker 1: was another, a whole lot like him, who decided to 733 00:51:01,555 --> 00:51:04,235 Speaker 1: take up journalism, possibly on the ground that when farming 734 00:51:04,235 --> 00:51:06,395 Speaker 1: went to hell, he could fall back on newspaper work. 735 00:51:07,075 --> 00:51:09,635 Speaker 1: He didn't realize, of course, that that would be very 736 00:51:09,715 --> 00:51:11,835 Speaker 1: much like falling back full length on a kit of 737 00:51:11,835 --> 00:51:17,355 Speaker 1: carpenter's tools. Haskins didn't seem cut out for journalism, being 738 00:51:17,435 --> 00:51:20,395 Speaker 1: too embarrassed to talk to anybody and unable to use 739 00:51:20,435 --> 00:51:23,555 Speaker 1: a typewriter, but the editor of the college paper assigned 740 00:51:23,595 --> 00:51:26,915 Speaker 1: him to the cow barns, the sheep house, the horse pavilion, 741 00:51:26,915 --> 00:51:32,155 Speaker 1: and the animal husbandry department. Generally, this was a genuinely 742 00:51:32,315 --> 00:51:36,155 Speaker 1: big beat, for took up five times as much ground 743 00:51:36,235 --> 00:51:39,995 Speaker 1: and got ten times as great a legislative appropriation as 744 00:51:40,035 --> 00:51:44,555 Speaker 1: the College of Liberal Arts. The agricultural student knew animals, 745 00:51:45,075 --> 00:51:49,355 Speaker 1: but nevertheless his stories were dull and colorlessly written. He 746 00:51:49,475 --> 00:51:53,155 Speaker 1: took all afternoon on each of them, on account of 747 00:51:53,195 --> 00:51:57,475 Speaker 1: having to hunt for each letter on the typewriter. Once 748 00:51:57,515 --> 00:51:59,635 Speaker 1: in a while he had to ask somebody to help 749 00:51:59,715 --> 00:52:05,195 Speaker 1: him hunt. C and L in particular, were hard letters 750 00:52:05,235 --> 00:52:08,875 Speaker 1: for him to find. His editor finally got pretty much 751 00:52:08,875 --> 00:52:12,195 Speaker 1: annoyed at the farmer journalists because these pieces were so uninteresting. 752 00:52:12,835 --> 00:52:15,795 Speaker 1: See here, Haskins, He snapped at him one day, why 753 00:52:15,875 --> 00:52:17,875 Speaker 1: is it we never have anything hot from you on 754 00:52:17,915 --> 00:52:20,635 Speaker 1: the horse pavilion Here? We have two hundred head of 755 00:52:20,635 --> 00:52:23,315 Speaker 1: horses on this campus, more than any other university in 756 00:52:23,315 --> 00:52:26,555 Speaker 1: the Western Conference except Purdue, and yet you never get 757 00:52:26,595 --> 00:52:29,715 Speaker 1: any real lowdown on them. Now shoot over to the 758 00:52:29,755 --> 00:52:34,915 Speaker 1: horse barns and dig up something lively. Haskins shambled out 759 00:52:34,995 --> 00:52:37,995 Speaker 1: and came back in about an hour. He said he 760 00:52:38,075 --> 00:52:41,595 Speaker 1: had something. Well tart it off, snappily, said the editor, 761 00:52:41,755 --> 00:52:45,595 Speaker 1: something people will read. Haskins sent to work, and in 762 00:52:45,635 --> 00:52:48,195 Speaker 1: a couple of hours brought a sheet of typewritten paper 763 00:52:48,235 --> 00:52:50,875 Speaker 1: to the desk. It was a two hundred word story 764 00:52:50,875 --> 00:52:54,075 Speaker 1: about some disease that had broken out among the horses. 765 00:52:54,635 --> 00:53:00,435 Speaker 1: Its opening sentence was simple but arresting. It read, who 766 00:53:00,515 --> 00:53:03,475 Speaker 1: has noticed the sores on the tops of the horses 767 00:53:03,475 --> 00:53:09,435 Speaker 1: in the animal husband building? Ohio State was a land 768 00:53:09,475 --> 00:53:13,355 Speaker 1: grant university, and therefore two years of military drill was compulsory. 769 00:53:13,755 --> 00:53:16,955 Speaker 1: We drilled with old Springfield rifles and studied the tactics 770 00:53:16,955 --> 00:53:19,235 Speaker 1: of the Civil War, even though the World War was 771 00:53:19,275 --> 00:53:22,195 Speaker 1: going on at the time. At eleven o'clock each morning, 772 00:53:22,275 --> 00:53:25,635 Speaker 1: thousands of freshmen and sophomores used to deploy over the campus, 773 00:53:25,915 --> 00:53:29,715 Speaker 1: moodily creeping up on the old chemistry building. It was 774 00:53:29,755 --> 00:53:32,155 Speaker 1: good training for the kind of warfare that was waged 775 00:53:32,155 --> 00:53:35,155 Speaker 1: at Shiloh, but it had no connection with what was 776 00:53:35,155 --> 00:53:38,595 Speaker 1: going on in Europe. Some people used to think that 777 00:53:38,635 --> 00:53:42,315 Speaker 1: there was German money behind it, but they didn't dare 778 00:53:42,475 --> 00:53:44,755 Speaker 1: say that or they would have been thrown in jail 779 00:53:44,795 --> 00:53:48,835 Speaker 1: as German spies. It was a period of muddy thought 780 00:53:48,995 --> 00:53:52,155 Speaker 1: and marked I believe the decline of higher education in 781 00:53:52,155 --> 00:53:56,395 Speaker 1: the Middle West. As a soldier, I was never any 782 00:53:56,475 --> 00:54:01,155 Speaker 1: good at all. Most of the cadets were glumly indifferent soldiers, 783 00:54:01,195 --> 00:54:07,435 Speaker 1: but I was no good at all. Once General Littlefield, 784 00:54:07,435 --> 00:54:10,395 Speaker 1: who was commandant of the Cadet Corps, popped up in 785 00:54:10,395 --> 00:54:13,675 Speaker 1: front of me during regimental drill and snapped, you are 786 00:54:13,715 --> 00:54:18,555 Speaker 1: the main trouble with this university. I think he meant 787 00:54:18,555 --> 00:54:21,715 Speaker 1: that my type was the main trouble with the university, 788 00:54:21,755 --> 00:54:25,435 Speaker 1: but he may have met me individually. I was mediocre 789 00:54:25,515 --> 00:54:30,115 Speaker 1: at drill. Certainly that is until my senior year. By 790 00:54:30,155 --> 00:54:32,755 Speaker 1: that time I had drilled longer than anybody else in 791 00:54:32,755 --> 00:54:36,035 Speaker 1: the Western Conference, having failed at military at the end 792 00:54:36,075 --> 00:54:38,355 Speaker 1: of each preceding year, so that I had to do 793 00:54:38,435 --> 00:54:41,715 Speaker 1: it all over again. I was the only seniors still 794 00:54:41,715 --> 00:54:44,915 Speaker 1: in uniform. The uniform, which when new had made me 795 00:54:44,955 --> 00:54:48,955 Speaker 1: look like an interurban railway conductor, now that it had 796 00:54:48,955 --> 00:54:52,395 Speaker 1: become faded and too tight, made me look like Bert 797 00:54:52,435 --> 00:54:58,835 Speaker 1: Williams in his Bellboy Act. This had a definitely bad 798 00:54:58,875 --> 00:55:03,475 Speaker 1: effect on my morale. Even so, I had become, by 799 00:55:03,555 --> 00:55:09,115 Speaker 1: sheer practice little short of wonderful at squad maneuvers. One day, 800 00:55:09,195 --> 00:55:11,915 Speaker 1: General Littlefield picked our company out of the whole regiment, 801 00:55:12,035 --> 00:55:14,115 Speaker 1: tried to get it mixed up by putting it through 802 00:55:14,155 --> 00:55:16,995 Speaker 1: one movement after another as fast as we could execute them. 803 00:55:17,035 --> 00:55:20,075 Speaker 1: Squad's right, squad's left, squad's on right into line, squad's right, 804 00:55:20,115 --> 00:55:23,875 Speaker 1: about squad's left front into line, et cetera. In about 805 00:55:23,955 --> 00:55:27,955 Speaker 1: three minutes, one hundred and nine men were marching in 806 00:55:28,035 --> 00:55:31,955 Speaker 1: one direction, and I was marching away from them at 807 00:55:31,955 --> 00:55:37,555 Speaker 1: an angle of forty degrees all alone. Company halt. Shouted 808 00:55:37,595 --> 00:55:42,515 Speaker 1: General Littlefield, that man is the only man who has 809 00:55:42,595 --> 00:55:47,355 Speaker 1: it right. I was made a corporal for my achievement. 810 00:55:50,435 --> 00:55:53,195 Speaker 1: The next day, General Littlefield summoned me to his office. 811 00:55:53,355 --> 00:55:56,555 Speaker 1: He was swatting flies when I came in. I was silent, 812 00:55:56,635 --> 00:55:59,155 Speaker 1: and he was silent too. For a long time. I 813 00:55:59,155 --> 00:56:01,915 Speaker 1: don't think he remembered me or why he had sent 814 00:56:01,955 --> 00:56:05,315 Speaker 1: for me. But he didn't want to admit that. He 815 00:56:05,355 --> 00:56:08,035 Speaker 1: swatted some more flies, keeping his eyes on them narrowly 816 00:56:08,075 --> 00:56:10,555 Speaker 1: before he let go with the swatter. But not up 817 00:56:10,595 --> 00:56:16,075 Speaker 1: your coat, he snapped. Looking back on it now, I 818 00:56:16,115 --> 00:56:19,115 Speaker 1: can see that he meant me, although he was looking 819 00:56:19,115 --> 00:56:23,075 Speaker 1: at a fly. But I just stood there. Another fly 820 00:56:23,235 --> 00:56:24,635 Speaker 1: came to rest on a paper in front of the 821 00:56:24,635 --> 00:56:27,355 Speaker 1: General and began rubbing its hind legs together. The General 822 00:56:27,435 --> 00:56:31,635 Speaker 1: lifted the swatter cautiously. I moved restlessly, and the fly 823 00:56:31,795 --> 00:56:35,915 Speaker 1: flew away. You startle them, barked General Littlefield, looking at 824 00:56:35,915 --> 00:56:40,115 Speaker 1: me severely. I said I was sorry. That won't help 825 00:56:40,155 --> 00:56:45,195 Speaker 1: the situation, snapped the general with cold military logic. I 826 00:56:45,195 --> 00:56:47,395 Speaker 1: didn't see what I could do, except offered to chase 827 00:56:47,435 --> 00:56:50,755 Speaker 1: some more flies toward his desk, but I didn't say anything. 828 00:56:51,555 --> 00:56:53,995 Speaker 1: He stared out the window at the faraway figures of 829 00:56:54,035 --> 00:56:57,915 Speaker 1: co Ed's crossing the campus towards the library. Finally he 830 00:56:58,035 --> 00:57:02,275 Speaker 1: told me I could go, so I went. He either 831 00:57:02,315 --> 00:57:04,675 Speaker 1: didn't know which cadet I was, or else he forgot 832 00:57:04,675 --> 00:57:07,395 Speaker 1: got what he wanted to see me about. It may 833 00:57:07,435 --> 00:57:10,635 Speaker 1: have been that he wished to apologize for having called 834 00:57:10,675 --> 00:57:13,395 Speaker 1: me the main trouble with the university, or maybe he 835 00:57:13,435 --> 00:57:16,155 Speaker 1: had decided to compliment me on my brilliant drilling of 836 00:57:16,155 --> 00:57:20,515 Speaker 1: the day before and then at the last minute decided 837 00:57:20,555 --> 00:57:25,595 Speaker 1: not to. I don't know. I don't think about it 838 00:57:25,675 --> 00:57:44,395 Speaker 1: much anymore. University Days by James Thurber. I've done all 839 00:57:44,435 --> 00:57:46,475 Speaker 1: the damage I can do here. Thank you for listening. 840 00:57:47,115 --> 00:57:51,515 Speaker 1: Any similarity to my University Days is purely coincidental. Countdown 841 00:57:51,515 --> 00:57:53,275 Speaker 1: has come to you from the Vin Scully Studios at 842 00:57:53,275 --> 00:57:55,395 Speaker 1: the Old Woman Broadcasting Empire in New York. If you 843 00:57:55,435 --> 00:57:57,915 Speaker 1: know anybody who does not listen to this podcast, please 844 00:57:57,955 --> 00:58:00,515 Speaker 1: tell them how wonderful it is. And if you're still 845 00:58:00,555 --> 00:58:03,595 Speaker 1: listening at this point, you must think it's wonderful. Countdown 846 00:58:03,675 --> 00:58:06,675 Speaker 1: musical director is Brian Ray and John Phillips. Schanel arranged, produced, 847 00:58:06,715 --> 00:58:10,035 Speaker 1: and performed most of our music. Mister Shanelle handled orchestration 848 00:58:10,075 --> 00:58:12,715 Speaker 1: and keyboards, Mister Ray was on the guitars, the bass, 849 00:58:12,715 --> 00:58:15,435 Speaker 1: and the drums, and it was produced by Tko Brothers. 850 00:58:15,595 --> 00:58:18,915 Speaker 1: The other music, including other Beethoven tunes, were arranged and 851 00:58:18,995 --> 00:58:22,555 Speaker 1: performed by No Horns Allowed. The sports music is courtesy 852 00:58:22,595 --> 00:58:25,515 Speaker 1: of ESPN, Inc. It was written by Mitch Warren Davis, 853 00:58:25,515 --> 00:58:28,475 Speaker 1: and we called the Olderman theme from ESPN two. Our 854 00:58:28,555 --> 00:58:32,195 Speaker 1: satirical and pithy musical comments are by Nancy Fauss, the 855 00:58:32,195 --> 00:58:35,275 Speaker 1: best baseball stadium organist ever. Our announcer today was my 856 00:58:35,355 --> 00:58:39,955 Speaker 1: friend Richard Lewis of Ohio State University, and everything else 857 00:58:40,035 --> 00:58:42,675 Speaker 1: was pretty much my fault. So that's countdown for this 858 00:58:42,715 --> 00:58:46,435 Speaker 1: the oney twenty fifth day since Donald Trump's first attempted 859 00:58:46,475 --> 00:58:49,315 Speaker 1: coup against the democratically elected government of the United States. 860 00:58:49,835 --> 00:58:53,515 Speaker 1: Convict him now while we still can. The next scheduled 861 00:58:53,515 --> 00:58:56,435 Speaker 1: countdown is Tuesday. Bulletins as the news warrants till then 862 00:58:56,435 --> 00:58:59,875 Speaker 1: on Keith Oulderman, Good morning, good afternoon, good night, and 863 00:59:00,035 --> 00:59:18,475 Speaker 1: good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. 864 00:59:18,795 --> 00:59:23,955 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 865 00:59:24,195 --> 00:59:26,155 Speaker 1: or wherever you get your podcasts.