Speaker 1: Cutbooms.
Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes
Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 2: of the old republic, a sol fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the
Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to the Clearinghouse
Speaker 2: of hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth
Speaker 2: Hour with Ben Maller starts right now in.
Speaker 3: The air everywhere, The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben Mallor
Speaker 3: and Danny g Radio and a very happy Friday to you.
Speaker 3: We have made it to the end of the road,
Speaker 3: which is never really the end of the road, because
Speaker 3: when you do the radio show during the week and
Speaker 3: you've got the podcast on the weekends, it never ends.
Speaker 3: It never ever ends. But we are back at it
Speaker 3: here on this Friday morning, celebrating National Merry Go Round Day.
Speaker 1: We It's National Merry Go Round Day, So listen.
Speaker 3: I used to love merry go rounds when I was
Speaker 3: a kid. I rotate nuts.
Speaker 1: How dare you? I'm an adult. I haven't been on
Speaker 1: one in a long time.
Speaker 3: I did love, though, I fell down another rabbit hole
Speaker 3: when I see these dopey holidays that get my attention.
Speaker 3: I'm like, hey, I want to know more about the
Speaker 3: merry go round. So then I started doing some research
Speaker 3: and you start typing some things in and some other
Speaker 3: things come up, and you keep going and going and
Speaker 3: going and going. The earliest known carousels five hundred a d.
Speaker 3: But it was really the Middle Ages, the beginning of
Speaker 3: the modern I say modern, it's crazy to say that,
Speaker 3: but the medieval period is when the merry go round
Speaker 3: as we know it first popped up. And it was soldiers,
Speaker 3: medieval soldiers who would compete in this game. It was
Speaker 3: a version of the current carousel ride to train for
Speaker 3: jousting tournaments. And they believe that's one of the reasons
Speaker 3: most carousels have horses on them, as a homage.
Speaker 1: To me evol times and the jousting.
Speaker 3: And then the next big period of time was one
Speaker 3: hundreds of years later. In the Industrial Revolution, the mass
Speaker 3: production of heavy machinery used in merrygo rounds became possible
Speaker 3: and so the carousels were more available. We couldn't really
Speaker 3: do that before there were a little small things. And
Speaker 3: then right around eighteen hundred, the first known carousel ride
Speaker 3: in America, and it was operated in Salem, Massachusetts, the
Speaker 3: Salem Witch Trials famous there it was called the Wooden
Speaker 3: Horse Circus Ride and that was in actually seventeen ninety nine.
Speaker 3: And then later on in the eighteen hundreds, the mass
Speaker 3: migration to America from Europe. Immigrants from Europe European countries
Speaker 3: began to put carousels everywhere.
Speaker 1: They loved carousels, probably it was big.
Speaker 3: In Europe, and so they came to America and they
Speaker 3: were like, hey, this is what we got to check
Speaker 3: it out and people were into it.
Speaker 1: So that's I think that's all I have. I think
Speaker 1: that's that's all I have.
Speaker 3: The first carousel patented was by William Schneider from Davenport, Iowa,
Speaker 3: and that was considered the first modern modern caressel.
Speaker 1: That was in eighteen seventy one. So there you go.
Speaker 1: That's that's enough. We're good on that.
Speaker 3: So on this podcast, we've got a Melancholie Maler Marlborough
Speaker 3: Man Malar meatball and if we have time, the phrase
Speaker 3: of the week, but we begin with this and it's
Speaker 3: Melancholy Maler. Last night, if you were listening, we did
Speaker 3: a special homage, a eulogy to a legend who was
Speaker 3: not someone that had wins and losses, not real wins
Speaker 3: and losses. There was somebody that wrote who won and
Speaker 3: who lost? But a cultural icon if you're of a
Speaker 3: certain age. I was a hall comaniac because I talked
Speaker 3: about last night, Halt Cogan seemed through the eyes of
Speaker 3: a child like he was one of the cartoon characters
Speaker 3: I would watch on Saturday morning when I was a
Speaker 3: little kid, and all we had was Saturday Morning cartoons
Speaker 3: because we lived in the dark ages, and I would
Speaker 3: watch he Man or some of these other superheroes, Captain America,
Speaker 3: you know, comic books. I'd look at those different things,
Speaker 3: and then you saw, like haul kose won, this guy
Speaker 3: looks like a real life superhero, Like this is legit,
Speaker 3: these comics, that's real life. And I was like, this
Speaker 3: must be based on real life. And Hulk Hogan. And
Speaker 3: then every as I talked about in the monologue last night,
Speaker 3: everything Hulk Hogan, I was in on some of my finest,
Speaker 3: fondest memories through the eyes of a child. Okay, through
Speaker 3: the eyes of a child, listen. I yeah, you don't know.
Speaker 3: At that time, when I was a kid, they had
Speaker 3: not revealed that wrestling was fake we were so stupid,
Speaker 3: were like, looks legit, you know, Andre the Giant taking
Speaker 3: on hul Cogan and Macho Man, Randy Savage and all
Speaker 3: these wild characters, right, wild characters.
Speaker 1: And so.
Speaker 3: Rest in peace, the hall Coger and I did see
Speaker 3: some stuff, people trying to urinate all over the holster
Speaker 3: and all that stuff. And listen, he was not perfect.
Speaker 3: No one's perfect. And hall Cogan, though it touched a
Speaker 3: lot of lives and was one of the most famous
Speaker 3: people in the United States.
Speaker 1: Of America when I was a kid.
Speaker 3: He was I think of when I was a kid,
Speaker 3: who were the most famous people? And hal Cogan is,
Speaker 3: I don't do a list. I'm not doing a list
Speaker 3: Terry in England. But I'm just telling you it's my
Speaker 3: big board, haul Cogan, as I've talked about, on that
Speaker 3: big board.
Speaker 1: So turning the page on that story time.
Speaker 3: Storytime on the fifth hour with me, Ben Mahler and
Speaker 3: Danny g who is producing this podcast and will hopefully
Speaker 3: joined me at some point this weekend, But we flashed
Speaker 3: back to a recent journey to the face of the Sun.
Speaker 3: So last weekend, the malordmobile was loaded up. We went
Speaker 3: to Rancho Mirage in the californ You desert, because why not.
Speaker 3: It's one hundred and fifteen degrees. Why would you not
Speaker 3: go there. It's the kind of heat that makes you
Speaker 3: question whether you're actually a human being or just a
Speaker 3: soft boiled egg. So we went out there to enjoy
Speaker 3: the nice heat and those beautiful luxury pools they have,
Speaker 3: and they were nice, tepid bathwater, lukewarm, wonderful, had a
Speaker 3: lazy river barely moving, just floating along there in the sun,
Speaker 3: baking like you're in a rotisserie. And it was just
Speaker 3: a nice weekend, a really more of a day than anything.
Speaker 1: Because you gotta do this podcast, but just.
Speaker 3: A day to kind of unwine and unplugged for a
Speaker 3: little bit and try not to die from the atmospheric pressure.
Speaker 1: Mind you, it is not global warming. It's called summer.
Speaker 1: It happens every year. And yet there I was, there
Speaker 1: I was, and there he was? And who is he?
Speaker 1: You ask, what are your pronoun who is he?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 3: That guy or go the guy guy fiery in the kitchen, now,
Speaker 3: mind you, not the actual guy. Of course, I'm talking
Speaker 3: about a glossy eight by ten of him mid bite,
Speaker 3: or maybe he was laughing. I don't know, sunglasses lowered,
Speaker 3: the look, the smile like he had just heard the
Speaker 3: punchline to a joke that involves some kind of bacon
Speaker 3: and bourbon, and he.
Speaker 1: Was dreaming of his camaro.
Speaker 3: And I had this epiphany while I was looking at
Speaker 3: this photo.
Speaker 1: You go to these places and it's like he was
Speaker 1: just there.
Speaker 3: You know, you toss in some kind of weird sign
Speaker 3: spatchelor or something like that, or you know there's a
Speaker 3: menu item like kangaroo sauce, nacho bomb, and that's the
Speaker 3: full guy theory experience. So this was a local burger
Speaker 3: joint out in the Palm Springs area and my wife
Speaker 3: found I don't know whether it's up to me.
Speaker 1: I eat it raising canes every time.
Speaker 3: But she's like, hey, let's let's find a restaurant, what
Speaker 3: kind of food as let's get burgers.
Speaker 1: So she goes on Yelp. She loves Yelp.
Speaker 3: I try to tell her, I said, listen, Yelp's fine,
Speaker 3: but a lot of those reviews are bullshit, and but she's.
Speaker 1: Like, oh, this is well reviewed, So she goes on there.
Speaker 3: She's flutzing around on Yelp, and this is not a
Speaker 3: food network pilgrimage. She didn't type in Food Network, diners,
Speaker 3: dive ins and drives. She didn't type any of that in.
Speaker 3: She just typed in burger places on Yelp, and this
Speaker 3: place came up. And if she typed in diners, drive
Speaker 3: ins and dives, I'd be like, okay, that she typed
Speaker 3: it into Google Maps or something. This wasn't that right.
Speaker 3: It wasn't you know, eat prey love with extra aoli. Regardless,
Speaker 3: it didn't matter. So Guy was already there, and he's
Speaker 3: always there, and that's the point.
Speaker 1: That's the point. I mean, I did not.
Speaker 3: Ask for Guy Fieri to be staring at me as
Speaker 3: I walked into this restaurant. I didn't look for Guy Fiery,
Speaker 3: but somehow he always is there.
Speaker 1: He finds me. And it's the same old thing.
Speaker 3: You walk into a diner off some dusty highway in
Speaker 3: some place you're not normally.
Speaker 1: At, and bam, bam bam, there is God. And this
Speaker 1: is not an exaggeration.
Speaker 3: The reason I'm bringing this up full disclosure, it's not
Speaker 3: just because of a one off at some burger joint
Speaker 3: in Palm Springs. But this is the fifth or sixth
Speaker 3: time in my travels in recent years that I have
Speaker 3: randomly sashade wandered into some restaurant I had never been
Speaker 3: to before, only to be greeted by the mayor of
Speaker 3: Flavortown right there. Now, One, you say, Okay, that's it,
Speaker 3: that's fine. Two maybe that's a coincidence, but keeps happening.
Speaker 3: It's like I'm getting getting photo bombed by a cartoon ghost.
Speaker 3: And he's not like stalking me, He's just there. And
Speaker 3: it is like he's the culinary version of the Virgin
Speaker 3: Mary appearing on toast. You see those stories every so often, right,
Speaker 3: or Jesus or something like that. Only this, this is
Speaker 3: with frosted tips and the wristbands and all that, which
Speaker 3: raises the obvious question, what the hell is going on?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 3: What the f is going on now? Guy Fieri. At
Speaker 3: some point in the last decade, and maybe it's been
Speaker 3: longer than that, I just feel like it's been the
Speaker 3: last decade, he went from being a guy that was
Speaker 3: goofed on a late night punchline to a full blown
Speaker 3: spiritual symbol. Now not in a religious sense, I don't
Speaker 3: upset you, and not in a religious sense, more so
Speaker 3: in the sense that when you walk into a mom
Speaker 3: and pop eatery and you see that framed Guy Fiery photo.
Speaker 3: You're experiencing something to the point now where I'm starting
Speaker 3: to wonder if these mom and pop restaurants it's part
Speaker 3: of the starter kit where when you're starting the restaurant,
Speaker 3: just to make it seem like you got street cred,
Speaker 3: you buy a photo of Guy Fieri with some chef
Speaker 3: and you just pretend like it's in the back of
Speaker 3: your kitchen.
Speaker 1: But there it is.
Speaker 3: Right. If Guy Fieri's face and a restaurant, it is
Speaker 3: like some kind of secular blessing, like a neon open
Speaker 3: sign to let you know it's okay, this is a
Speaker 3: safe space for your stomach. And it says this place
Speaker 3: may not pass the health inspection, but.
Speaker 1: It is going to slap good. It is going to
Speaker 1: be good.
Speaker 3: It's not really the fame anymore. It's a mythological thing.
Speaker 3: And so I've determined that Guy Fieri when it comes
Speaker 3: to mom and pop restaurants is Buddha. He's Buddha with
Speaker 3: Oakley's right, He's back in the day. I loved Anthony Bourdain.
Speaker 3: I loved his take on restaurants and the way that
Speaker 3: he yapped and the voiceovers and all that. But it's
Speaker 3: like Guy Fieri is now Anthony Bourdain and technicolor, and
Speaker 3: he is. What happens when you take out that old
Speaker 3: food pyramid and you put a hype man right now,
Speaker 3: It like that's the hype man, and people talk about, hey,
Speaker 3: you got to support local businesses, and I grew. I
Speaker 3: believe that's important, right, that's important, and I tried to
Speaker 3: do that. I try to avoid when I'm traveling, uh,
Speaker 3: and I actually commit to that life as much as
Speaker 3: I can, and I try to avoid the Applebee's and
Speaker 3: the Cheesecake Factory and the Olive Garden and all those place.
Speaker 3: It's not that I don't enjoy the food there. I
Speaker 3: used to eat a cheesecat factory all the time.
Speaker 1: And you know all.
Speaker 3: The places that have the big calorie counts on the
Speaker 3: menu because they are big, corporately run restaurants. So once
Speaker 3: you commit to going away from those places, you begin
Speaker 3: to notice what I call the fiery effect.
Speaker 1: It just appears.
Speaker 3: And it's not just the photo on the wall in
Speaker 3: these mom and pop joints. It's like the whole zeitgeist.
Speaker 3: Like the portions are always usually supersized, like the good
Speaker 3: old days at McDonald's back in the day. They've got
Speaker 3: some funky sauce that the foodies love. There's a weird cocktail.
Speaker 3: They threw a holapano in there. Nobody knows why.
Speaker 1: They just did it.
Speaker 3: And there's an eighty four percent chance that the server
Speaker 3: will be wearing a shirt with some kind of flying
Speaker 3: pig or a flame on it. And it always goes
Speaker 3: back to the Buddha, right, the Buddha with Oakleys. The
Speaker 3: man is omnipresent, so he's not necessarily following you. He
Speaker 3: has become you, at least the culinary aspect. And I
Speaker 3: used to think it was.
Speaker 1: A wack adoodle, right, wackadoodle, But he's omnipresent. Like, how
Speaker 1: is Guy?
Speaker 3: Everywhere I go again, and everywhere I'm obviously embellishing a bit.
Speaker 3: I had that moment that he is and this is
Speaker 3: really the other thing here. When I kept seeing Guy
Speaker 3: the breaking point, the tipping point was last weekend. But
Speaker 3: Guy Fieri is like one of the final unifying mascots
Speaker 3: we have in America now. When I was a kid
Speaker 3: back in my day, and I grew up watching Haul Cogan,
Speaker 3: but I also had in these things called magazines a
Speaker 3: lot of advertisements with Joe Cammell and the Marble Man,
Speaker 3: and they're gone, right, you don't see a lot of
Speaker 3: the Marble Man. You don't see Joe Campbell. Now we
Speaker 3: have Guy. It's like post all that. It's you know,
Speaker 3: the thing that made him easy to mock back in
Speaker 3: the day, the flames, the hokey, corny catchphrases, the diners
Speaker 3: drenched in the devil's blood of ranch dressing. Now that
Speaker 3: is what has become his signature and is universally loved.
Speaker 3: And you don't need to know who the national is to,
Speaker 3: you know, enjoy the triple stacked French to stuffed with
Speaker 3: blueberries and cheesecake and all this other. But Guy speaks
Speaker 3: to to the fact that restaurants they feel like they
Speaker 3: need that as a street credit.
Speaker 1: I said earlier, like.
Speaker 3: They need that a guys provide street because, like they
Speaker 3: were legit. He's the rubber stamp, the you know, in
Speaker 3: sports memorabilia, you got to get something authenticated. He's the
Speaker 3: authenticator for a generation, you know. And then you know,
Speaker 3: we talking about Michelin Star restaurants and all that, but
Speaker 3: you know, I don't necessarily want to go to those places.
Speaker 1: But he will.
Speaker 3: You can absolutely trust some dude who used to work
Speaker 3: at a restaurant.
Speaker 1: You know, he's a barely.
Speaker 3: Got out of school from northern California, Nor cal the
Speaker 3: bleach blonde dude yelling this is money, this is money,
Speaker 3: and uh, you know, the riding off into the sunset.
Speaker 3: So maybe it's not a coincidce. I don't think it's
Speaker 3: a coincidence, Like maybe guy Fiery is just what ends
Speaker 3: up happening when you're on the journey. And I'm not
Speaker 3: talking about some fake social media sojourn. We're talking about
Speaker 3: the real sweaty you know, melting pot road trip that
Speaker 3: involves stopping somewhere.
Speaker 1: That you didn't really plan on.
Speaker 3: And they might have an elk burger on the menu,
Speaker 3: smothered and ghost pepper aolie.
Speaker 1: I don't even know what that is.
Speaker 3: And there he is, you know, he's not working as
Speaker 3: the chef. Is he a celebrity?
Speaker 1: Well not in this case.
Speaker 3: He's just not even a real person at this point. Again,
Speaker 3: he is smiling the kitchen Buddha. He's there.
Speaker 1: He's saying, welcome, you found it. The food is good here,
Speaker 1: It's okay.
Speaker 3: Yes, Now, one thing that was not on the menu
Speaker 3: at this burger place was the Malar meatball. But we
Speaker 3: turned the page because I would like to remind you
Speaker 3: some of the highlights of the week.
Speaker 1: Here we mentioned the Hull cogan. That not a highlight.
Speaker 1: Doing a eulogy. It's like the old Casey Kasem thing.
Speaker 3: I'm sick and tied coming out of an upbeat song,
Speaker 3: and I got to do a dog death dedication. You
Speaker 3: know all that, But watch out for the algorithm army.
Speaker 3: Another reminder this week now, if you listen to the
Speaker 3: Overnight Show, and God bless you if you do, and
Speaker 3: you probably do. Most people, very rarely do I get
Speaker 3: an email. You know, I don't never hear your Overnight show,
Speaker 3: but I hear that fifth hour podcast.
Speaker 1: I don't get a lot of that.
Speaker 3: So we do twenty hours of original audio content on
Speaker 3: the show. Mallard monologues. Each hour starts with the Malar monologue. Now,
Speaker 3: typically each one covers not one, not two, but three stories. Right,
Speaker 3: that is roughly sixty topics covered on live radio six
Speaker 3: hundred plus stations. That's the math, right, So all of
Speaker 3: the week's work, the one that launched all of the
Speaker 3: things I talked about, the one that launched the biggest uprising.
Speaker 1: You know what it was.
Speaker 3: It was not the Malleur pluse. I will have the
Speaker 3: Mallard pluza postgame though later this weekend. We like to
Speaker 3: learn all the affiliates down line. The malod Palooza postgame
Speaker 3: coming up down line. But take a guess what do
Speaker 3: you think costs the biggest uprising?
Speaker 1: Ding?
Speaker 2: Ding ding ning?
Speaker 1: Yes, the spicy.
Speaker 3: Margherita Mallard monologue, the late night soliloquy on Hail to
Speaker 3: the red Skins, Hail to Victry. Yes, the Redskins and
Speaker 3: the Cleveland Indians nickname monologue did that, and suddenly I
Speaker 3: had a bullseye on my chest. Public Anime number one,
Speaker 3: I mentioned President Donald J. Trump supporting the return of
Speaker 3: those old sporty nicknames that were canceled in the crazy
Speaker 3: COVID hayze of the twenty twenty period and all that.
Speaker 1: So I ended up.
Speaker 3: With the pitchfork wokester p one charging I don't think
Speaker 3: they're p ones, but they were. They were charging at
Speaker 3: me like I had just pulled the fire alarm during
Speaker 3: their nap time over at NPR headquarters. And why because
Speaker 3: I dare say something they did not like? And More importantly,
Speaker 3: I believe this to be true. The algorithm told them
Speaker 3: not to like it, and now let's not kid ourselves, right,
Speaker 3: every man, woman and child knows that I don't believe
Speaker 3: this was like totally on the up and up, and
Speaker 3: I didn't talk about it on the air too much
Speaker 3: because I didn't want to give them the satisfaction that
Speaker 3: what they were getting. Really a lot of the trolls
Speaker 3: just want the reaction, So if I don't bring it up,
Speaker 3: you know, fine. Sometimes I like to engage dumb people
Speaker 3: like astro fans, Ehstros. But this was digital attempted, digital stoning, stoning.
Speaker 3: You could feel it happening in real time. A lot
Speaker 3: of us was email also, so the second the mal
Speaker 3: monologue hit the airwas I say, hit the airways. I'm
Speaker 3: talking about the rebroadcast and repackaging on the different social
Speaker 3: media is like.
Speaker 1: YouTube or whatever.
Speaker 3: The algorithm was then activated like some kind of weird
Speaker 3: trapdoor beneath the gas bag headquarters, and boom, bam, bang,
Speaker 3: out came the box. That's right, like Transformers, more than
Speaker 3: meets the eye, or in this case, more than meets
Speaker 3: the ear. So the I'm talking about the paid blue
Speaker 3: check mark wannabes. Also that used to mean something if
Speaker 3: he had a blue check mark.
Speaker 1: Not anymore. The the buzzword brigadiers.
Speaker 3: Screaming, You're just a Malor Mallor meatball is all you are.
Speaker 1: That's why you're doing the overnight show. You know, all
Speaker 1: the usual nonsense.
Speaker 3: If you were any good, you'd be on during today.
Speaker 3: Uh And but the Malor meatball one.
Speaker 1: One one dude. I don't even know where the guy
Speaker 1: was from. I can assume, but I.
Speaker 3: Think he is from Boston and might might or might
Speaker 3: based on his email and I might have looked him up.
Speaker 3: May have gone to an Ivy League school in the
Speaker 3: Boston area. Anyway, the guy was very upset with me.
Speaker 3: You just to malor me, you know, the meatball while
Speaker 3: you're on a night And I was like, Malor meatball,
Speaker 3: that sounds delicious. We got to get a Mallard meatball
Speaker 3: on the menu. We have the Ben Mallard chicken fingers
Speaker 3: at the Landing in Liberty, Missouri. We have the Ben
Speaker 3: Maller chicken sandwich at the Sportsbook Bar and Grill in Denver,
Speaker 3: but not the Malar meatball. How about an oversized giant
Speaker 3: meatball with an not spaghetti Feticini. How about that who
Speaker 3: says no, malar meatball covered in marinera but surrounded by fetichini,
Speaker 3: Alfredo with the Alfredo sauce chef's kiss, who says no,
Speaker 3: he contacted me. Let's do it, malar meatball. I'm in
Speaker 3: come on anyway. So back to the story. So I decided, okay, fine,
Speaker 3: let's play ball. And again, this is a one on
Speaker 3: one situation. So what was my response to this guy
Speaker 3: who called me a malar meatball?
Speaker 1: That's why you're on an overnights dude.
Speaker 3: I pointed out that what I do is an opinion
Speaker 3: based show.
Speaker 1: And while it is true I'm on in.
Speaker 3: The middle of the night, the fact that you valued
Speaker 3: my opinion so much you spent time to track down
Speaker 3: how to contact me, I'm honored by because I have
Speaker 3: no idea who you are, and I would have had
Speaker 3: no contact with you if you hadn't reached out to me.
Speaker 3: And then I said, listen again, it's opinion based. I
Speaker 3: gave my opinion. Then I asked, what exactly did I
Speaker 3: say that was wrong? It's always a tough question. Their
Speaker 3: response was pretty much radio silence. Crickets, you know nothing
Speaker 3: real nothing tangible. Instead with this guy, this one guy
Speaker 3: in particular, sent was a copy and paste. It seemed
Speaker 3: like he had sent it to other people links from
Speaker 3: like a New York Times opinion page article, and there
Speaker 3: was something else.
Speaker 1: I go back to NPR.
Speaker 3: It was like some kind of NPR thing about this,
Speaker 3: And so listen, here's the truth.
Speaker 1: The Outgo Rhythm Warriors.
Speaker 3: They don't really want to admit that they're locked in
Speaker 3: in their dogma. Everything's political, right, mascots are political, and
Speaker 3: this is more evidence of that. But the mere mention
Speaker 3: of a story that was in the news cycle because
Speaker 3: the President of the United States talked about it, and
Speaker 3: we're a sports show and it tied in, the mere
Speaker 3: mention of team nicknames sends certain people into full death
Speaker 3: con one meltdown, right meltdown. It's no longer you know
Speaker 3: context or your opinion. We can agree to disagree. It's
Speaker 3: been it han't been less way in years. Right, it's
Speaker 3: not new, but it's about.
Speaker 1: Enforcing your worldview. And it doesn't matter.
Speaker 3: They don't even know who I am, you know, but
Speaker 3: yet they want to take shots and over even an
Speaker 3: adopey overnight sports radio show. And if I'm someone they
Speaker 3: agree with, and I had said the thing they like,
Speaker 3: then I would have been nominated for a Nobel prize.
Speaker 1: Right. But if somebody like me says, hey, you know
Speaker 1: they didn't. You know you said the wrong thing. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm a maul or meatball, burn the radio tower down. Now.
Speaker 3: Look, I'm not here to be the advocate for the
Speaker 3: Redskins of the Indies. I'm merely pointing out the information
Speaker 3: I have that the fans in Cleveland, the fans in Washington,
Speaker 3: the real customers of those teams want those nicknames back,
Speaker 3: that the uprising was greatly embellished by the algorithms, the
Speaker 3: bots and all that stuff, and most people don't give
Speaker 3: a crap, and most people look at mascots as an honor,
Speaker 3: not a shameful thing. But anyway, listen, I mean, I
Speaker 3: get it. I'm here to talk sports occasionally. Part of
Speaker 3: the job is you have to ruffle feathers. It goes
Speaker 3: with the territory. But from time to time, when you
Speaker 3: speak some truth right, you end up not passing the
Speaker 3: NPR sniff test. Now, I'm always amazed, like, we have
Speaker 3: a diverse audience. We have a lot of people from
Speaker 3: different backgrounds, and the great thing. I love Jonathan and
Speaker 3: Delaware sent me an email the other day and I
Speaker 3: love Jonathan's been with the show a long time.
Speaker 1: I love the guy. He's great. Hope to meet him someday.
Speaker 3: And Jonathan like he gets the show. He's like, listen,
Speaker 3: he said, this is the thing I like about the show.
Speaker 1: Jonathan. I'm paraphrasing this, but he says, You've.
Speaker 3: Always been the guy that it doesn't matter your background,
Speaker 3: whether you're you know, gay, transgender, you're a pig, you're
Speaker 3: a deviant, whatever, You're a criminal, you're a crackhead, you're
Speaker 3: a meth head, whatever, Hello Jed who fled like all
Speaker 3: that stuff, raging alcoholic.
Speaker 1: You're all welcome.
Speaker 3: You're all welcome, right, And as Jonathan was pointing out,
Speaker 3: I was like, you know, we just accept people for
Speaker 3: who they are. But with one rule, we bust balls,
Speaker 3: we bust chops. That's kind of how it works, right.
Speaker 3: We're sarcastic, we bust each other's weaknesses, whatever that might be.
Speaker 3: And so I'm not sitting here reading press releases from
Speaker 3: activist groups or corporations pretending to care about things they
Speaker 3: ignored for decades. I'm not That's not my jam man,
Speaker 3: I'm not. I just try to get through the day.
Speaker 3: I worry about that, you know, old John woodenline, win
Speaker 3: the day right, make every day your masterpiece, and that's
Speaker 3: my goal.
Speaker 1: And then when I'm done with the show, I put
Speaker 1: the show to bed and I move on. And then
Speaker 1: people react and they get all worked up.
Speaker 3: And you know, if you're honest, like the outrage on
Speaker 3: this is not again, it's not organic.
Speaker 1: It's like prepackage.
Speaker 3: It's like Marcel eating a Celeste pizza, a frozen pizza.
Speaker 3: The people who claim to have been offended, we're not
Speaker 3: even listening until the offendo meter lit up on their feed.
Speaker 3: And again, I just to double down. They don't know
Speaker 3: the show, they don't know who I am. They have
Speaker 3: no idea who I am. They don't care. It's just
Speaker 3: that's backstory, the Mama Luke's. They saw something, you know,
Speaker 3: some kind of sign and they leapt into action, and
Speaker 3: it's about, you know, I have moral superiority to you,
Speaker 3: and I'm going to tell you you're wrong, and it's
Speaker 3: performative outrage.
Speaker 1: And just listen. If you disagree, that's fine. I mean,
Speaker 1: who knows, you could be wrong.
Speaker 3: I could be wrong, but spurry the lecture, right, and
Speaker 3: I don't need the hyperlinks.
Speaker 1: You know, it's fine. I'm good. I don't need that.
Speaker 3: And you know, I kind of like the fact that
Speaker 3: you called me a malar meatball. And hopefully that will
Speaker 3: inspire some restaurant that I don't even know of that
Speaker 3: I'll learn of to put the malar meatball oversized jumbo
Speaker 3: sized malar meatball with fetichini on the side, and then
Speaker 3: a big helping of garlic bread yum yum to my
Speaker 3: tomb tumb who says no?
Speaker 1: Who says no? All right, time now for the phrase
Speaker 1: of the week.
Speaker 3: That's right, I know it's exciting, the phrase of the week.
Speaker 3: So here's the phrase of the week. So the phrase
Speaker 3: is flash in the pan. Now it originates from believe
Speaker 3: it or not, not cooking, not sports, from military. So
Speaker 3: many of these phrases start in the military. A lot
Speaker 3: of veterans, a lot of active duty military help. My
Speaker 3: son is in the Marines right now, is in Camp Pendleton.
Speaker 3: But this is another one of those things that starts
Speaker 3: out in the military. Flash in the pan. It originated
Speaker 3: in early firearms. Now specifically they say the flint lock musket.
Speaker 3: So we're going back to the musket in the seventeenth
Speaker 3: and eighteenth centuries, the flintlock musket had a small pan,
Speaker 3: according to my research, and it held this thing called gunpowder,
Speaker 3: and when the trigger was pulled on the flint lock musket,
Speaker 3: when you pulled it, the flint would struck. It struck
Speaker 3: to produce a spark. There was a little spark there.
Speaker 3: It ignited the powder in the pan. And apparently sometimes
Speaker 3: the powder in the pan would flash and the main
Speaker 3: charge in the barrel would not ignite, resulting in yes,
Speaker 3: wait for it, a flash in the pan, but no
Speaker 3: real musket shot. And over time, as all great metaphors,
Speaker 3: over time a flash in the pan came to mean
Speaker 3: something that initially showed great promise like shooting a musket
Speaker 3: or excitement, but failed to deliver, failed to live up
Speaker 3: to the expectation. So brief, intense moment of success, but
Speaker 3: fizzled out quickly. And that is what we have used
Speaker 3: in sports. Someone starts out their career and they're like, oh, man,
Speaker 3: that players like Paul Skins.
Speaker 1: I give Paul Skins of the Pirates great electric Is
Speaker 1: he going to keep doing that? Who knows?
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: He won't If he doesn't, it'll be a flash in
Speaker 3: the pan. All right, we'll get out on that. I
Speaker 3: will have the malord Palooza post game. We're gonna save
Speaker 3: that for the Saturday podcast. And I've got some other
Speaker 3: things planned as well, but we'll get to that. Danny
Speaker 3: g should join me on that.
Speaker 1: We'll have new pods all weekend long.
Speaker 3: If you want to send something into the mail bag,
Speaker 3: do it right now, send it in care of the
Speaker 3: Real Real Fifth Hour at gmail dot com. The Real
Speaker 3: Fifth Hour at gmail dot com, and your comments can
Speaker 3: and we'll be.
Speaker 1: Used on future editions of the show.
Speaker 3: So anyway, I have a great Friday, and hopefully nobody
Speaker 3: famous that was a hero in my youth will die today.
Speaker 1: I'm good with the Haulkster. Well I'm not good with
Speaker 1: him dying, but you get the point. All right.
Speaker 3: Well, we'll talk to you next time later, Skater, who
Speaker 3: asta pasta got a murder?
Speaker 1: I gotta go.