WEBVTT - Feel Stuck in the Wrong Job? This ONE Mindset Shift Will Help You FINALLY Discover Your Purpose (Even If You’re Starting From Zero) 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:04.120 The number one health and wellness podcast Shetty. 0:00:08.600 --> 0:00:12.240 Today we have best selling author, motivational speaker, and big 0:00:12.320 --> 0:00:16.040 time podcaster Jay Shetty, who's out on let y'all Know 0:00:16.120 --> 0:00:18.920 Now out on its All Purpose live tour right now. 0:00:19.480 --> 0:00:21.520 Speaking of that, man, I think it's so cool, Jay, 0:00:21.600 --> 0:00:24.680 when you show the pictures of how it started to 0:00:24.720 --> 0:00:28.040 how it's going, and I actually counted the people in 0:00:28.120 --> 0:00:31.040 one of the picture. It was only twelve to be 0:00:31.160 --> 0:00:34.240 in the position that you're in now. When you started 0:00:34.280 --> 0:00:38.800 out on this journey. How could you ever have imagined 0:00:38.960 --> 0:00:42.519 that it would end up where you are now, touring 0:00:42.720 --> 0:00:46.479 the country, touring the world in some senses, and people 0:00:46.600 --> 0:00:48.360 power into arenas to see. 0:00:48.560 --> 0:00:51.160 I don't think you could ever imagine it, and that's 0:00:51.200 --> 0:00:53.920 what's beautiful about it. I think the challenge today is 0:00:54.400 --> 0:00:57.160 everyone has too much pressure. Every video has to have 0:00:57.200 --> 0:01:00.320 a million views, Everything you post has to get lots 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:03.840 of engagement, Everything you share has to get lots of attention. 0:01:04.560 --> 0:01:07.319 When I started giving my first talks, I was in 0:01:07.360 --> 0:01:12.360 a room like the corner of this the size of 0:01:12.400 --> 0:01:15.560 the corner of this room, and the first time I 0:01:15.600 --> 0:01:18.520 went to speak, zero people showed up. So I just 0:01:18.600 --> 0:01:22.680 practiced to the four walls, and the second time I 0:01:22.720 --> 0:01:27.000 showed up, no one showed up, And so I practiced 0:01:27.000 --> 0:01:29.560 to the four walls. And the third time I realized 0:01:29.560 --> 0:01:31.759 that the fire the person who was putting the flyers out, 0:01:31.800 --> 0:01:36.840 because who went in a good job. But for years, 0:01:36.880 --> 0:01:40.280 nearly ten years before I posted a video, I was 0:01:40.319 --> 0:01:44.240 speaking to groups of small rooms. I was speaking of 0:01:44.280 --> 0:01:46.560 groups of three people, five people, ten people, And I'll 0:01:46.600 --> 0:01:49.520 be honest with you, I never ever felt, why is 0:01:49.640 --> 0:01:52.760 only ten people? I never ever felt, oh, it's only 0:01:52.800 --> 0:01:55.160 twenty people today, I would have loved it to be 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:57.760 fifty or one hundred, don't get me wrong, but I 0:01:57.840 --> 0:01:59.560 never thought it needed to be more than that. I 0:01:59.640 --> 0:02:02.560 was just happy that anyone would take time out of 0:02:02.600 --> 0:02:05.680 their day to come and hear about things that were 0:02:05.680 --> 0:02:08.240 meant to be good for them. But you know, it 0:02:08.320 --> 0:02:10.520 wasn't hey, here's how to do this, or here's how 0:02:10.560 --> 0:02:12.799 to get rich, or it was here's how to improve 0:02:12.840 --> 0:02:16.960 your life. And so for me, those years of spending 0:02:17.080 --> 0:02:21.000 hours and hours and hours with people, roughly ten years later, 0:02:21.040 --> 0:02:23.600 when I post my first video and I start to 0:02:23.639 --> 0:02:27.680 have the groundswell experience of more people finding out about 0:02:27.680 --> 0:02:30.720 my work. I live in gratitude every day. I post 0:02:30.720 --> 0:02:35.080 those to show people that no one starts in an arena. 0:02:35.680 --> 0:02:39.240 Everyone starts at zero. And the reason why we don't 0:02:39.280 --> 0:02:41.880 start is not because we're scared of starting at zero. 0:02:41.960 --> 0:02:44.760 We're scared of people watching us start at zero. We're 0:02:44.760 --> 0:02:47.280 scared of the opinions of people around us starting at zero. 0:02:47.360 --> 0:02:49.440 We're not scared of starting from scratch. We're scared of 0:02:49.840 --> 0:02:52.880 our friends seeing us start from scratch. And I just 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:55.520 want to remind people that everyone started zero. You did, 0:02:55.720 --> 0:03:00.040 you did, and everyone on planet Earth did, and that 0:03:00.160 --> 0:03:01.440 means you can do it as much as I have. 0:03:02.160 --> 0:03:04.200 Hey change, By the way, I just want to say this, 0:03:04.200 --> 0:03:06.679 this is the first time Fred's voice has been out 0:03:06.720 --> 0:03:07.760 sexy doing our show. 0:03:08.160 --> 0:03:13.239 Oh yeah, yeah, that London. 0:03:13.320 --> 0:03:17.040 That London is sexy. Now I see it. 0:03:17.960 --> 0:03:21.760 I want to ask you about motivational speaking and spiritual advisors. 0:03:22.440 --> 0:03:24.760 What about on the others? Why do people need them? 0:03:24.880 --> 0:03:27.880 I'm a I'm a I'm not a pessimist, but I'm 0:03:27.919 --> 0:03:29.760 a you know, I'm a person that thinks about it, 0:03:29.800 --> 0:03:32.600 like I don't talk to anybody like this is this 0:03:32.639 --> 0:03:35.640 is probably my therapy with us doing this. What about 0:03:35.640 --> 0:03:38.080 on the other side, why do people need you to 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:38.840 get them going? 0:03:38.960 --> 0:03:40.080 Like, bro, tighten up. 0:03:41.880 --> 0:03:44.119 You know what's really interesting is when you're doing it, 0:03:44.480 --> 0:03:47.440 you don't think that's what you're doing. So when I 0:03:47.480 --> 0:03:49.760 first started learning from the monks, I was just trying 0:03:49.800 --> 0:03:52.400 to share what they were teaching me because I thought 0:03:52.440 --> 0:03:55.960 it was valuable. It's almost like if someone told you, hey, 0:03:56.000 --> 0:03:58.119 this is really cool thing. There's this cool spot, there's 0:03:58.160 --> 0:04:00.360 this great movie, there's this great song that, there's this 0:04:00.560 --> 0:04:03.520 great rapper, there's this great artist. If someone introduced you 0:04:03.560 --> 0:04:06.440 to that, you'd start talking about it because it was cool. 0:04:07.120 --> 0:04:09.840 And so for me, wisdom was cool, and so I 0:04:09.920 --> 0:04:11.760 was just sharing it because it changed my life and 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:13.560 had an impact on me, and I thought it would 0:04:13.600 --> 0:04:16.000 help other people. So from my side, you don't even 0:04:16.040 --> 0:04:18.880 see yourself that way. You just see yourself as a 0:04:18.920 --> 0:04:23.640 spiritual dealer because you're just sharing what's helping you and 0:04:23.720 --> 0:04:26.000 you want it to help other people. So from my side, 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:29.000 I don't look at myself as that. I think for people, 0:04:29.080 --> 0:04:33.200 what happens is we're all looking for people who represent 0:04:33.279 --> 0:04:36.760 what we're chasing, who represent what we're pursuing, who represent 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:39.719 what we admire. And I think the thing is everyone 0:04:39.920 --> 0:04:44.000 needs someone or something to believe in. Now, I don't 0:04:44.040 --> 0:04:45.560 want people to believe in me. I want them to 0:04:45.600 --> 0:04:48.840 believe in the wisdom. So that's my responsibility to make 0:04:48.839 --> 0:04:50.880 it very clear. I don't want you to believe in me. 0:04:50.920 --> 0:04:54.359 I'm flawed, I'm human, I have weaknesses. But the wisdom 0:04:54.400 --> 0:04:58.600 has lasted for five thousand years. There's nothing in the 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:01.640 world that has lasted apart from the world the planet 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:05.400 for five thousand years. I remember talking about The Bug 0:05:05.440 --> 0:05:07.760 with Gito, which is the book that I referenced a 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:10.599 lot in my books. I was speaking about it with 0:05:11.760 --> 0:05:14.480 a guy that had met and he was big in business, 0:05:15.320 --> 0:05:17.000 and he said to me after the interview. This was 0:05:17.080 --> 0:05:19.200 years ago. He said to me, because, how long did 0:05:19.240 --> 0:05:21.880 you say that book's been around? I said, five thousand years. 0:05:22.480 --> 0:05:24.000 He goes, oh, there must be truth in it. If 0:05:24.040 --> 0:05:26.960 it's lasted five thousand years. You think about the best 0:05:27.040 --> 0:05:29.280 music artists, they're not going to last five thousand years. 0:05:29.640 --> 0:05:31.240 You think about the best movies, they're not going to 0:05:31.279 --> 0:05:33.840 last five thousand years. Well, I'm definitely not going to 0:05:33.880 --> 0:05:37.520 last five thousand years. So the fact that something has 0:05:37.520 --> 0:05:41.000 stood the test of time, that's worth sharing. So I'm 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:43.160 trying to get people to believe in that because that 0:05:43.880 --> 0:05:45.960 is actually going to change their life. Them believing in 0:05:46.000 --> 0:05:49.680 me or another person or whatever is kind of insignificant 0:05:49.680 --> 0:05:50.320 and irrelevant. 0:05:50.640 --> 0:05:53.160 You also try to get people to believe in their 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:57.320 purpose because you speak about passion being what you like 0:05:57.520 --> 0:06:00.800 and purpose being what you give. Take us back to 0:06:01.320 --> 0:06:03.000 the moment when you say you were just in the 0:06:03.080 --> 0:06:05.279 room waiting for people, and you were staring at the 0:06:05.279 --> 0:06:10.040 four walls. Right, if your purpose wasn't greater than your passion, 0:06:10.800 --> 0:06:12.480 would we be doing this interview today. 0:06:13.240 --> 0:06:16.800 That's a great question. The purpose is what drives you, 0:06:17.279 --> 0:06:22.160 because when you're doing your passion, there may not be 0:06:22.200 --> 0:06:25.240 the result immediately. And so for me, the way I 0:06:25.279 --> 0:06:27.640 like to explain it is, your passion is for you. 0:06:27.640 --> 0:06:29.719 Your passion is doing something that brings you joy. It 0:06:29.720 --> 0:06:33.200 could be baking, could be photography, could be organizing your 0:06:33.240 --> 0:06:36.760 kid's birthday. It could be coaching them, you know, a 0:06:36.839 --> 0:06:39.760 football or soccer or whatever it may be. That could 0:06:39.760 --> 0:06:42.440 be your passion. But as soon as you start doing 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:45.599 it to improve other people's lives, that's where it becomes 0:06:45.640 --> 0:06:48.560 a purpose. When you start connecting it with making someone 0:06:48.600 --> 0:06:51.640 else's day better. So instead of just baking for you, 0:06:51.640 --> 0:06:53.960 you're not baking for the homeless. Instead of just baking 0:06:54.000 --> 0:06:56.440 for you, you're not baking for the community. Instead of 0:06:56.480 --> 0:06:59.120 just taking pictures for yourself, you start sharing it so 0:06:59.160 --> 0:07:01.159 the people who don't have the money to travel that 0:07:01.240 --> 0:07:04.200 far can now see what it looks like to experience it. 0:07:04.520 --> 0:07:06.400 All of a sudden, you start to get that feedback 0:07:06.440 --> 0:07:09.080 and you realize you're meant for more, You're made for more, 0:07:09.120 --> 0:07:13.840 You're here for more. For me, I would have kept going, 0:07:13.880 --> 0:07:16.000 and I did keep going for ten years of sharing 0:07:16.000 --> 0:07:20.520 it in small rooms because I saw impact on one person. 0:07:21.040 --> 0:07:23.680 And I think if anyone wants to build a product, 0:07:23.760 --> 0:07:27.080 a business, a service, a show, you've got to see 0:07:27.120 --> 0:07:30.280 how it impacts one person before you can impact one 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:33.600 million people. If your product can't change one person's life, 0:07:33.920 --> 0:07:36.520 it's never going to change a million people's lives because 0:07:36.560 --> 0:07:39.000 the feedback you get from that one person is everything. 0:07:39.440 --> 0:07:42.640 That one person could help you improve your product, your service, 0:07:42.680 --> 0:07:44.960 your energy, your show more than anyone. I'm sure you 0:07:44.960 --> 0:07:46.880 guys have had it, Like you've had someone who watches 0:07:46.960 --> 0:07:50.600 every Pivot podcast right every episode. They're like, you know what, 0:07:50.600 --> 0:07:52.920 I really liked him when you guys did that. I 0:07:52.960 --> 0:07:54.680 wasn't sure when you guys did that, And same for me. 0:07:54.720 --> 0:07:56.960 People will be like, I really like it when you 0:07:56.960 --> 0:07:58.960 share your opinion. I really like it when you stay 0:07:59.000 --> 0:08:02.160 true to your value. That's what helps you keep going. 0:08:02.240 --> 0:08:05.600 So to me, I kept going because there was always 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:09.520 one person who was being moved. And even today, when 0:08:09.520 --> 0:08:12.800 I'm speaking to a large audience or an arena, I'm 0:08:12.880 --> 0:08:16.000 visualizing being in that small room with three to five people, 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:18.720 because that's how intimate I want it to feel. I 0:08:18.720 --> 0:08:21.600 wanted to feel like this. This is special. Just the 0:08:21.600 --> 0:08:24.160 intimacy you guys have created here. This is special, and 0:08:24.200 --> 0:08:26.640 I want people in a room full of thousands to 0:08:26.640 --> 0:08:29.200 feel like this because this is what we're all craving. 0:08:29.800 --> 0:08:31.400 No one's craving to be in a room full of 0:08:31.440 --> 0:08:35.199 thousands of people. Everyone's craving this eye contact, this kind 0:08:35.240 --> 0:08:39.480 of connection, this kind of space, and it's our job. 0:08:39.679 --> 0:08:41.959 And that's what you guys do so well here. Whenever 0:08:42.000 --> 0:08:43.680 I watch your clips, this is how I feel. I 0:08:43.679 --> 0:08:45.520 feel this close to you. Before I met you, I 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:48.120 felt like I knew you because I'd seen so many 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:50.320 of you guys's clips and it felt like you guys 0:08:50.360 --> 0:08:52.800 were genuine and sincere. You were doing this for the 0:08:52.880 --> 0:08:55.640 right reason, and so I think we've got to give 0:08:55.679 --> 0:08:58.040 that give people that experience. And that's what I've always 0:08:58.040 --> 0:09:01.240 tried to do, whether it was five people of five thousand. Jay. 0:09:01.400 --> 0:09:04.800 I look at you, man, the finally manicured hair, right, 0:09:05.160 --> 0:09:09.480 the beard always taped up, obviously, the gear. And I 0:09:09.520 --> 0:09:12.440 see you in bad boys and moving around, and it's like, 0:09:12.520 --> 0:09:14.240 man like this dude's kind of like me. 0:09:14.400 --> 0:09:16.080 Make sure his hair is nice. He make sure his 0:09:16.120 --> 0:09:18.280 clothes or tight, right, he gonna stay clean. 0:09:18.800 --> 0:09:21.840 And I see the lifestyle you live now, and I 0:09:21.920 --> 0:09:26.120 try to just put my mind and say, okay, Jay Shetty, 0:09:26.320 --> 0:09:32.320 after being college educated, decided to follow the monastic way? 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:37.800 What was it about that lifestyle that drew you to 0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:39.160 the astronum? 0:09:39.440 --> 0:09:41.240 When I met my monk teacher, I saw that he 0:09:41.320 --> 0:09:46.439 dedicated his life to monstering his emotions and his mind 0:09:47.000 --> 0:09:50.720 and serving other people. And that's what attracted me. I 0:09:50.800 --> 0:09:55.079 felt that that felt like a life worth pursuing. When 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:57.560 I met him, I remember I'd met people who are 0:09:57.679 --> 0:10:01.920 rich and famous and successful, but I don't think i'd 0:10:01.960 --> 0:10:04.400 met anyone who was content and happy in their own skin. 0:10:05.360 --> 0:10:08.320 I'm a monk teacher didn't have any of those other things, 0:10:08.480 --> 0:10:10.760 but he was happy in who he was, and I 0:10:10.800 --> 0:10:13.679 was like, I want that, Like that feels like the 0:10:13.760 --> 0:10:17.599 life I want to have. And he graduated also from it, 0:10:18.200 --> 0:10:20.600 which is the MIT of India. So he went to 0:10:20.640 --> 0:10:24.800 one of the best colleges in the country. For example, 0:10:24.880 --> 0:10:28.000 the current CEO of Google went to that university. Like 0:10:28.040 --> 0:10:31.280 that's the level of institution. And he gave that all 0:10:31.360 --> 0:10:32.760 up to be a monk. So I was thinking, and 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:34.640 I was at college at the time, and I was thinking, 0:10:35.080 --> 0:10:36.800 wait a minute, if I'm going to aspire to get 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:39.800 a job like that, this guy's given it up. There's 0:10:39.800 --> 0:10:42.720 something amazing about him. So to me, it was truly 0:10:42.760 --> 0:10:45.040 the fascination. And I'm sure you've had it in sports. 0:10:45.080 --> 0:10:46.920 I'm sure you've had it in business where you see 0:10:46.960 --> 0:10:50.120 someone and you just like the way they move and 0:10:50.200 --> 0:10:53.320 you think, how are you that happy, that peaceful, that content? 0:10:53.640 --> 0:10:55.920 And I just wanted to know. And so to me, 0:10:56.000 --> 0:10:58.960 it was as simple as finding one person who is 0:10:59.000 --> 0:11:01.839 living differently. And I always say to people, everyone needs 0:11:01.880 --> 0:11:03.800 to find their monk. And what I mean by that 0:11:03.920 --> 0:11:06.960 is who's the one person you haven't met yet that's 0:11:07.000 --> 0:11:09.439 going to change the trajectory of your life. Who's the 0:11:09.480 --> 0:11:12.240 one person who embodies what you believe life is about. 0:11:12.600 --> 0:11:14.400 It might not be a monk, it might be something else, 0:11:14.800 --> 0:11:18.680 but everyone has to find that. And for me, mental stability, 0:11:19.200 --> 0:11:24.120 resilience and peace and service to others have always felt 0:11:24.160 --> 0:11:27.320 like the best pursuits. And now when you're talking about 0:11:27.480 --> 0:11:29.960 you know, the hair or the clothes or whatever it is, 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:34.840 I'm giving myself permission to be all of myself. So 0:11:34.960 --> 0:11:36.520 I enjoy presenting myself. 0:11:36.559 --> 0:11:36.839 Well. 0:11:37.320 --> 0:11:39.560 I like living an intentional life. I think the way 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:43.800 we dress, the way we appear, everything's about intention and 0:11:44.200 --> 0:11:47.720 that's what mindfulness is. Mindfulness ultimately, is am I mindful 0:11:47.760 --> 0:11:50.480 about what I wear? What I think about, how I 0:11:50.559 --> 0:11:52.960 show up, what energy I walk into the room with, 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:56.160 if I'm kind to people. That's what mindfulness is about. 0:11:56.360 --> 0:11:59.360 So to me, everything from like this room has been 0:11:59.400 --> 0:12:02.560 mindfully designed. I walked in and I felt happy, I 0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:05.679 felt good, I felt it was comfortable, it was inviting. 0:12:06.280 --> 0:12:07.720 But let's say you were like, oh, it doesn't matter, 0:12:07.720 --> 0:12:10.160 it only matters what's on the inside. We'll just sit 0:12:10.200 --> 0:12:13.560 in a black room. Yeah, well that's gonna affect your mindset. 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:18.080 So mindfulness also means focusing on the outside and the inside. 0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:21.480 And I think immature mindfulness is like, oh, it only 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:24.800 matters what's on the outside, And materialism is it only 0:12:24.840 --> 0:12:27.520 matters what's on the outside, right, So I think that's 0:12:27.559 --> 0:12:30.079 the mistake we make as humans. We think, Oh, if 0:12:30.080 --> 0:12:33.319 I'm spiritual, it means only the inside matters. And if 0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:37.560 I'm material only the outside matters. And intentional mindful living 0:12:37.720 --> 0:12:40.960 is they both affect each other. If I'm in a 0:12:41.000 --> 0:12:44.240 messy outside space, I'm gonna be messy up here. And 0:12:44.280 --> 0:12:46.400 if I have a messy world here, it doesn't matter 0:12:46.400 --> 0:12:48.880 how clean my outside is, I'll never be at peace. 0:12:49.280 --> 0:12:51.160 And that's what I learned in the monastery for Shure. 0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:55.560 Monk ism, is it like the fight club where you 0:12:55.640 --> 0:13:00.160 can't talk about the fight club? Like I know had 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:02.080 to become a crip or a blood you get jumped in. 0:13:02.640 --> 0:13:04.880 What's the process of becoming a monk? Like you meet 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:10.400 your advisor, your monk teacher, and then you become a monk. 0:13:10.440 --> 0:13:11.840 What is that process? 0:13:11.920 --> 0:13:15.040 Yeah, no, there's there's a system for sure, and it's 0:13:15.080 --> 0:13:16.960 not like fight club. You can totally talk about it. 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:19.280 They don't get jumped in. 0:13:20.160 --> 0:13:21.400 They jump you in because. 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:30.040 Tool the initiation is the daily practice and commitment to it. 0:13:30.360 --> 0:13:33.240 So you're waking up at four am, you're meditating for 0:13:33.280 --> 0:13:36.240 four to eight hours a day. You sleep on the 0:13:36.240 --> 0:13:39.360 floor on a thin mat and have a sheet. When 0:13:39.360 --> 0:13:41.320 you're in India, you have a mosquito net because the 0:13:41.360 --> 0:13:43.640 mosquitoes will bite you all night, so you've got to 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:46.640 be inside of this tent like thing. You get two 0:13:46.679 --> 0:13:49.439 sets of robes. You wear one, you wash one. All 0:13:49.480 --> 0:13:52.960 your possessions fit inside a gym locker and you live 0:13:53.040 --> 0:13:56.120 that practice. You eat what you're given. You don't get 0:13:56.120 --> 0:13:58.000 to choose. There's no menu, you don't get to say 0:13:58.000 --> 0:14:00.959 to that one pizza and doesn't exis. Everyone eats the 0:14:01.040 --> 0:14:03.800 same thing. There's no space that's yours. So we'd be 0:14:03.840 --> 0:14:05.880 in a room like this and there's thirty men sleeping 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:07.760 in it, and you just put your mout down and 0:14:07.800 --> 0:14:10.800 go to sleep. It's not like that's my corner. The 0:14:11.160 --> 0:14:13.360 idea is to lose a sense of I, me and 0:14:13.480 --> 0:14:18.120 mind until you have very very few possessions. And it's 0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:22.240 that daily practicing commitment that if they see you're dedicated 0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:25.840 to that allows you to become a monk, Like. 0:14:25.800 --> 0:14:28.240 Let's ride to the monastery, like I've seen no one 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:31.000 get it, Like yeah, that process of it, like you 0:14:31.120 --> 0:14:33.640 being a monk and your books, you know, the mindset, 0:14:34.480 --> 0:14:38.360 the like Okay, I met this dude and then now 0:14:38.400 --> 0:14:41.120 I'm sleeping on the mat, yeah, with thirty dudes sitting 0:14:41.120 --> 0:14:44.120 in the room with me. Like that that process, like 0:14:44.240 --> 0:14:46.239 it what why? 0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:46.440 Like? 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:47.560 But what what is that? 0:14:47.880 --> 0:14:50.360 Those steps? Is it something mental? Then the shaven of 0:14:50.440 --> 0:14:50.920 the hair and. 0:14:50.880 --> 0:14:53.360 All that stuff like yeah, I like the day the 0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:57.640 process from living a normal life, have an apartment, graduating 0:14:57.640 --> 0:14:59.800 from one of the best schools, and now I have 0:15:00.080 --> 0:15:03.160 no possessions, I'm in a locker and I'm sleeping on 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:04.880 the floor with twenty nine dudes. 0:15:05.200 --> 0:15:07.520 So I was so young when I did it that 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:11.760 there was a sense of naive following. And what I 0:15:11.760 --> 0:15:13.720 mean by that is I was just like, yeah, let's 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:16.040 give it a go, Let's try it out, like, let's 0:15:16.120 --> 0:15:18.040 test it out. I kind of went in there as 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:20.280 an experiment. I was like, can I do this? What 0:15:20.280 --> 0:15:22.120 did it look like? And I think I had that 0:15:22.240 --> 0:15:25.840 openness of that age where you aren't necessarily asking all 0:15:25.840 --> 0:15:28.240 these questions, you're kind of just like, let's see how 0:15:28.280 --> 0:15:31.200 it goes. And to me, it was as simple as 0:15:32.280 --> 0:15:34.680 I spoke to the monk in England, which is where 0:15:34.680 --> 0:15:36.720 I first met him, and then he invited me to 0:15:36.760 --> 0:15:39.320 India to spend time with him. So I flew over 0:15:39.520 --> 0:15:43.360 during my Christmas breaks in college vacations, and I would 0:15:43.440 --> 0:15:45.440 spend time with him at the monastery. And now at 0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:47.960 that time, I would get a more comfortable room and 0:15:48.000 --> 0:15:50.520 I'd do the practices so they didn't throw me right 0:15:50.520 --> 0:15:53.160 into the deep end. But I did that so often 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:56.200 that I got so used to it that when I graduated, 0:15:56.600 --> 0:15:59.240 I knew what I was getting myself into. It's almost like, 0:15:59.280 --> 0:16:01.640 you've seen this is you're going to sleep it. You've 0:16:01.680 --> 0:16:03.920 seen what it looks like. And I, truly, if I'm 0:16:03.920 --> 0:16:06.560 completely honest, I didn't give it too much thought. I 0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:08.240 was just like, I'm open to it. Let's see if 0:16:08.280 --> 0:16:11.160 it works, let's test it out. And so to me, 0:16:11.320 --> 0:16:16.120 the mindset was being open, not being skeptical, and being 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:20.360 a human guinea pig and going let's see if this 0:16:20.920 --> 0:16:23.400 proves to be true. And the more I did it, 0:16:23.440 --> 0:16:26.920 the more I gained confidence in it because I mean 0:16:26.960 --> 0:16:29.720 to me a kid from London waking up at four am. 0:16:29.960 --> 0:16:32.000 You know, as a college student, that's unheard of. You're 0:16:32.040 --> 0:16:35.640 getting back at four am right from going out, and 0:16:35.680 --> 0:16:37.080 so all of a sudden, I'm waking at four am. 0:16:37.160 --> 0:16:39.080 But I literally said, I'm just going to do this 0:16:39.160 --> 0:16:42.320 properly and see if it works. And I think that's 0:16:42.360 --> 0:16:45.040 something I'd like to encourage, especially young people to do, 0:16:45.560 --> 0:16:47.280 is if you're going to try something out, go all 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:50.040 in and test it out for seven days, and if 0:16:50.040 --> 0:16:52.800 it doesn't work, don't do it again. But the problem 0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:54.280 is we never go all in. We do it for 0:16:54.280 --> 0:16:56.120 a day. If I said to you, I really want 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:59.120 to learn about American football, right, I really want to 0:16:59.200 --> 0:17:01.920 understand the game. Well, if I come to one game 0:17:01.920 --> 0:17:03.800 a year, what am I going to learn? If you 0:17:03.800 --> 0:17:05.480 get a one meditation a year, what are you going 0:17:05.560 --> 0:17:07.840 to learn? I'm not going to learn anything. But if 0:17:07.880 --> 0:17:10.199 I sat with you every single day, if I followed 0:17:10.200 --> 0:17:12.600 you around, if I followed the players around, then I'm 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:15.320 actually going to learn something, right. And so I think 0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:18.560 it's that intimacy and that connection to a coach, a 0:17:18.600 --> 0:17:22.080 mentor a guide that makes it easier to understand what's 0:17:22.080 --> 0:17:24.480 happening and what's going on. So it's an immersive experience. 0:17:24.600 --> 0:17:26.320 Does that make sense. I want to make sure I 0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:28.280 answer your question. It's a great question. 0:17:28.800 --> 0:17:33.280 Yeah, it seems crazy to do, but you wanted to 0:17:33.359 --> 0:17:34.280 dive in, and. 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:36.760 That's totally it is crazy. It was so now when 0:17:36.760 --> 0:17:39.560 I look back, I'm like, what was I thinking? But 0:17:39.680 --> 0:17:43.760 I had that young, naive spirit of this guy has 0:17:43.800 --> 0:17:46.960 something I don't have and I want it. And you 0:17:47.000 --> 0:17:48.880 could think about how that mindset can get you into 0:17:48.920 --> 0:17:51.920 trouble right when you're young. I'm sure I saw lots 0:17:51.920 --> 0:17:55.280 of guys who had amazing cars and rims and you know, 0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:57.760 clothes and whatever it is, and you can get involved 0:17:57.800 --> 0:18:00.119 in the wrong things because you also want that. I 0:18:00.200 --> 0:18:03.200 just was really lucky that the person I was inspired 0:18:03.200 --> 0:18:05.320 to be like was a monk. People who was asking me, 0:18:05.400 --> 0:18:07.320 how did you have that at such a young age. 0:18:07.440 --> 0:18:11.360 I truly think it's because of their aura and their presence. 0:18:11.720 --> 0:18:14.439 I don't it's a little bit of me. I have 0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:16.280 a good heart. I was raised to be a good man. 0:18:16.359 --> 0:18:19.320 My mom raised me well. But they are just so 0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:23.560 powerful in their presence that you just couldn't help but 0:18:23.960 --> 0:18:26.639 want to live that way. And I'm lucky that it 0:18:26.680 --> 0:18:28.880 was the right people not the wrong people, because that 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:32.199 naive mindset can end up, you know, in completely the 0:18:32.240 --> 0:18:32.840 other direction. 0:18:32.960 --> 0:18:34.920 I just want to add to that too, J before 0:18:34.960 --> 0:18:38.360 I get into the immersion, because you're here now, you're 0:18:38.359 --> 0:18:40.160 wanted the boys. 0:18:39.880 --> 0:18:41.520 And this is more so for Channing. 0:18:41.560 --> 0:18:43.200 But I just want to say before I get into 0:18:43.240 --> 0:18:47.000 that question, is you're not your thoughts, right, You're not 0:18:47.080 --> 0:18:47.720 your emotions. 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:49.480 You're the observer of those things. 0:18:49.840 --> 0:18:53.239 And a young Jay, you were able to observe, you know, 0:18:53.520 --> 0:18:56.080 what you wanted when you met this monk, and it 0:18:56.080 --> 0:18:58.200 allowed you to discover your identity. 0:18:57.800 --> 0:19:00.560 And your real purpose. If I'm the right ones. 0:19:00.560 --> 0:19:03.280 Absolutely, But in terms of Channing, I want to go 0:19:03.359 --> 0:19:06.960 back to when you say being mindful right, and your 0:19:06.960 --> 0:19:08.320 appearance and your approach. 0:19:09.760 --> 0:19:10.600 What drives that? 0:19:10.680 --> 0:19:16.320 Because Channing calls it insecurity there so conversation more so 0:19:16.359 --> 0:19:20.200 than awareness, because he feels that the way Ryan dresses 0:19:20.320 --> 0:19:22.359 or the way I might dress, or the things I wear, 0:19:22.760 --> 0:19:26.640 which comes across as materialistic, but it's something that I like, Right, 0:19:27.440 --> 0:19:31.600 how do you what drives your mindfulness? I'm sure it's 0:19:31.600 --> 0:19:35.240 not an insecurity more so than it is awareness itself. 0:19:35.520 --> 0:19:37.760 Of wanting to present yourself this way. 0:19:38.359 --> 0:19:40.680 The way I like to think about it is two 0:19:40.760 --> 0:19:45.000