Speaker 1: Gambling was something that I did.
Speaker 2: This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble.
Speaker 1: One of my bookies died at the Kitchen Table, a
Speaker 1: podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling.
Speaker 1: One bet, another bet, another bet.
Speaker 2: Without doing the actual gambling.
Speaker 3: You're a coward.
Speaker 1: It's easy to have a scapegoat And now joined by
Speaker 1: bad Larring, Shay and Irving and Dylan the graphics got
Speaker 1: I have friends.
Speaker 2: Here's Dan Patrick.
Speaker 1: All right? Uh, Shay is here in case that's your
Speaker 1: first question. Dylan is here. Picture Deray Marvin is here
Speaker 1: running the controls. I don't know how well he's doing this.
Speaker 1: Feels like you might screw this whole thing up.
Speaker 3: Hopefully not on brand for the show though.
Speaker 1: Okay, So anything you need to recap from your life
Speaker 1: after last week? Shay, uh no a therapy tomorrow. That
Speaker 1: was Thanksgiving? I survived. I did fine. I did I
Speaker 1: didn't drink or do any drugs. There was definitely a
Speaker 1: politics discussion at the table that I stayed out of
Speaker 1: because it's all moot at this point. Anybody that believes
Speaker 1: in democracy really doesn't hold a candle to me.
Speaker 3: They're getting it.
Speaker 1: Do you have a dip in Yeah? It's okay. We're
Speaker 1: just spilling that. You almost spilled your white claw on me.
Speaker 1: This is my Christmas miracle, Danny, What are you doing Copenhagen. No,
Speaker 1: it's fake. It's a cancer freeze.
Speaker 3: It's non tobacco.
Speaker 1: It looks just like Copenhagen. It tastes like Copenhagen. No
Speaker 1: free ads, but fully loaded, y'all, full nicotine's strength. Bingo bengo. Okay,
Speaker 1: but it sounds like you got to dip in. It
Speaker 1: sounds like it. Yeah, it does. I don't know how
Speaker 1: professional we want to know.
Speaker 3: I noticed no difference, to be honest.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, you're kind of sure like that. That's from
Speaker 1: the booze.
Speaker 3: That's a stroke.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you didn't get slapped over Thanksgiving? They got close
Speaker 1: really yeah. Yeah. They start talking about politics, Danny and
Speaker 1: the roommates kicking me under the table, like, don't you
Speaker 1: say anything. It's pretty fun. Okice, So therapy tomorrow. This
Speaker 1: will be the first time you'll see your therapist since
Speaker 1: your apology. Yes, since my apology. The first time I'll
Speaker 1: be seeing to whom it made concern, to whom it
Speaker 1: may concern. Hopefully she soaked that up.
Speaker 3: I'm sure she's subscribed for concern.
Speaker 1: She probably bought a couple of shirts already. To Danny,
Speaker 1: I think she's a fan.
Speaker 3: Fan for life. She's into it.
Speaker 1: If you'd like to get some merchandise from Dan Patrick
Speaker 1: takes a gamble.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we've got we're rocking the uh uh I take
Speaker 3: it in the can coozies where Larry?
Speaker 1: Where can you get this merchandise?
Speaker 3: You can get at the link in the Instagram bio.
Speaker 1: This is link.
Speaker 3: We're working on getting a formal domain name. Dan Facebook
Speaker 3: was taken. Okay, Dan patrick dot com was taken.
Speaker 1: Oh weird. Yeah, somebody's bowguarden that name.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I looked it up. We can get dp
Speaker 3: takes a gamble dot com for eleven dollars a year.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's like a bargain, so right off, that is
Speaker 1: nine Uh let me. Uh everybody lost this weekend. I'm
Speaker 1: a big winner.
Speaker 4: We were all four and five. I lost two units.
Speaker 1: So yes, yes, I got Dylan losing one and a half,
Speaker 1: all right, and Shay you lost one. I'm not counting
Speaker 1: the jam you lost. No, no, that was it doesn't
Speaker 1: work that way doing it. They were up seventeen to
Speaker 1: nothing and a half. Give up. Seventeen and the fourth quarter.
Speaker 1: I'm not counting it. That's the one.
Speaker 3: It does count. I had Marshall money line, Bitch.
Speaker 1: Larry, you get the Diego Pavia Award. You put two
Speaker 1: units on all your NFL games and uh you fell flat.
Speaker 3: So Larry's making a very late push for the Pavia
Speaker 3: Award season winner.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, You've got it like six six weeks.
Speaker 3: Larry's at four two.
Speaker 4: This is my second. That's not true that for a chance,
Speaker 4: it's my fourth.
Speaker 5: Yes, r I believe last episode we skipped the Pavia
Speaker 5: by accident. But you got it last week too, Larry.
Speaker 3: Okay, secret, Hilarry, you have seven now.
Speaker 1: By the way, the Ohio State Michigan situation postgame awesome,
Speaker 1: I love it. No terrible, Oh no, it's so cool.
Speaker 1: This is there's nothing wrong with being entertained by violence.
Speaker 1: This is America. We enjoy violence, and the fact that
Speaker 1: there were cops spraying players with fucking irritant is awesome.
Speaker 1: This is only an America, Danny. Okay, awesome, Okay, I
Speaker 1: loved that. Let me just kind of put it in
Speaker 1: a different perspective. Let's say your daughter's going to the
Speaker 1: Ohio State. She ain't playing there, she's on the field,
Speaker 1: it's over. She went to No, she's a Michigan fan
Speaker 1: and she traveled to see Michigan beat Ohio State. So
Speaker 1: she was at the game and she's on the field
Speaker 1: and she gets pepper sprayed. You okay with it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I would be asking her a lot of questions about
Speaker 1: her decision making process. What are you doing on you
Speaker 1: would be at Yeah about okay?
Speaker 3: Okay? So who's she friends with on the team.
Speaker 1: That's exactly she's football players, miss owned. Okay. Have you
Speaker 1: been pepper sprayed before?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Okay. I got pepper sprayed at Wet and Wild and
Speaker 1: Are in Kon, Texas when I was fourteen. That was
Speaker 1: the first time I ever got pepper spray. Which one
Speaker 1: wet Wild It's like, uh six flags but water.
Speaker 3: Okay? Have you ever been pepper sprayed in like a riot?
Speaker 2: Is this?
Speaker 1: That was the right situation And I got pepper sprayed.
Speaker 3: At the Capitol at January sixth.
Speaker 1: January seventh is the worst day about at the RNC
Speaker 1: Saint Paul, Minnesota, where McCain and Palin were the nominees.
Speaker 1: I got pepper sprayed there after a rage against Machine
Speaker 1: concert on Capitol Hill. It was bananas. I got pepper
Speaker 1: sprayed there. Antifa was everywhere. Danny Larry, have you been
Speaker 1: pepper sprayed?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: I have not, don Okay, it's early Dylan, how about you?
Speaker 3: I have not. Actually, surprisingly, I'm not as big of
Speaker 3: a rioter as.
Speaker 1: The breathing part is the most surprising. The fact that
Speaker 1: you can't breathe it.
Speaker 3: Do they use like bear mace?
Speaker 1: Are like?
Speaker 3: Because I know there's like did they sell like the
Speaker 3: little pink ones that like check's carry in their purse.
Speaker 3: That's like, I think a lot more mild than.
Speaker 1: Probably what, Yeah, that's just an appetizer. Those don't hurt. Yeah,
Speaker 1: from what I hear, uh Ray has since Ray produces this,
Speaker 1: Ray says a new segment, great debate. What's better military
Speaker 1: flyover at a game or a Creed halftime show?
Speaker 3: What's more patriotic than both of those two things?
Speaker 1: What if? Well, Creed is more spiritual than patriotic.
Speaker 3: But if you ask Shay, those are one and the same.
Speaker 1: Really, what if he was actually flying the plane, Scott Staff, Yeah,
Speaker 1: he could do it. You could do it blind for yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: He could do anything. I think it flew across a
Speaker 3: fucking Cowboys stadium.
Speaker 1: No, he didn't do that. Some lacky did. He didn't
Speaker 1: actually get in the rope and swing.
Speaker 3: I think he did.
Speaker 1: No, he didn't know he did not. Anyway, the flyover
Speaker 1: I think is amazing thing. It's also solely American, and
Speaker 1: I think it's badass. If we're gonna waste as many
Speaker 1: tax dollars as we waste, we might as well get
Speaker 1: how much does that cost? It's got to be a shit.
Speaker 3: That's probably so much money.
Speaker 1: What do you think a million dollars gotta be dumping?
Speaker 3: What do you do the cost to take off and
Speaker 3: land one of those fighter jets? It's probably astronomical. Anyways,
Speaker 3: I we think, right, yeah it does. That is you'll
Speaker 3: never paying for it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I might as well see some cool ship.
Speaker 3: You'll never feel more.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't you be more willing to pay for something if
Speaker 1: you've got a bill that specifically said your tax dollars
Speaker 1: are going for a flyover at Texas and like this
Speaker 1: pothole and yeah, like you got an actual receipt, right,
Speaker 1: that would have been funny. During like the Iraq War,
Speaker 1: that could have centered like all the kills you killed yourself.
Speaker 1: We killed a thousand insurance based off of your SOID
Speaker 1: security tax as well. I mean congratulation.
Speaker 3: Way to go.
Speaker 5: Yes, right, so three bombers over super Bowl costs around
Speaker 5: one hundred and fifty five thousand dollars per per plant.
Speaker 3: That's a deal, Purple, Well that's around It probably ends
Speaker 3: up being about a mill right. Well, it's those three.
Speaker 1: So you think could I get them for my Christmas party?
Speaker 3: They want a fly one?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Can I get a like a biplane?
Speaker 3: Being economical, you get get a biplane with a banner
Speaker 3: behind it?
Speaker 1: I like that?
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah that you.
Speaker 1: Can probably probably know who the biplane voted for. Tell
Speaker 1: you that.
Speaker 3: They voted for Shay.
Speaker 7: Yes, yes, Speaking of your Christmas party, what's on the menu?
Speaker 1: We have Alan's thives. Add we have alligator, don't we're
Speaker 1: cooking on the trigger. You're smoking the gate, it's the tail.
Speaker 1: It's up to Chad.
Speaker 3: Chad's cooking.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be there. On being Vienna Yeah and
Speaker 1: then pulled pork. I think we're doing. Is she cooking anything?
Speaker 1: Who is she? Super bird? Super Bird? Yeah? Like who's
Speaker 1: Sue Bird? Your wife? Oh? I tell you're talking about
Speaker 1: super Bird? The basketball? Yes, I'm talking about basketball player.
Speaker 1: My wife is Sue Bird. Okay, I'll let her know.
Speaker 1: I'll have to explain.
Speaker 3: I don't know a lot of other famous sues.
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 1: Anyway, my wife cooks a lot of things. If she
Speaker 1: cooking for the party, though, I don't know if it's
Speaker 1: just Trager thing or what Tragger's doing the grilling stuff,
Speaker 1: but yeah, my wife will be cooking. Uh her, She's
Speaker 1: got chili that she makes, so she does some nice things.
Speaker 7: Okay, just let yes. I was also saying that because
Speaker 7: my wife offered to make oriole balls?
Speaker 1: What what's that?
Speaker 6: Those things went what it sounds like relatively fast?
Speaker 5: What they were in the back room for maybe five minutes,
Speaker 5: and there were thirty of them and they were all gone.
Speaker 2: They're that good.
Speaker 1: Okay, if your wife would like to bring some oreo balls,
Speaker 1: I'd be more than happy to let me tell me
Speaker 1: what an oreo ball is.
Speaker 7: All right, So my wife crunches up all the oriole
Speaker 7: balls in this mixer and then she puts them up
Speaker 7: into balls.
Speaker 1: Cookies she crunches.
Speaker 7: She crunches up the cookies and then makes them into ball,
Speaker 7: makes them into balls, and then puts them in like this.
Speaker 6: Like this batter like this meltz it.
Speaker 7: Yeah, this meltic cake batter basically and base it and
Speaker 7: then puts them in the freezer, takes them out.
Speaker 6: They're good to go.
Speaker 1: I don't get it. Okay, well you won't be there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're beating Vienna sausage.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, do you have sausage in Vienna? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like oh I eat okay, pork.
Speaker 3: You could go to art school there too.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, let me recap here. A bigger disappointment
Speaker 1: this year the forty nine ers of the Cowboys niners
Speaker 1: for surety okay, okay, everyone except Cowboys are pretty disappointing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, I mean but part of me saw this coming.
Speaker 1: I wanted to denounced it and said, maybe I'm stupid,
Speaker 1: but you lose what five starters, eight contributors and get
Speaker 1: nobody in free agency. Part of me was like, we're fucked,
Speaker 1: but they were all all in. All right, I'm just
Speaker 1: going to ruin Christmas too, Okay, So recamping here anything that. Yeah, Dylan,
Speaker 1: you got roughed up in college.
Speaker 3: College was College was brutal. Marshall Moneyline though pulled it
Speaker 3: out at the end.
Speaker 1: Congratulates that JM. You yeah, ry bad Larry. Yeah, kind
Speaker 1: of hit or miss here, yeah ye yelling.
Speaker 4: No, I'm totally hit or miss. I'm definitely and I
Speaker 4: bet I didn't put on a show, but I bet
Speaker 4: JM you I was up seven were half shy, and
Speaker 4: he come back and went to money line for brutal,
Speaker 4: kidding me brutal.
Speaker 1: That might be the first time in the history of
Speaker 1: this show that Larry's admitted that he made a bet
Speaker 1: that was losing show.
Speaker 3: And you can talk about using bets that you made
Speaker 3: off the show.
Speaker 1: No, you only talk about, oh, you know I had
Speaker 1: that one right, but I bet that off the show
Speaker 1: Max bet.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you never ever say oh I lost to bet.
Speaker 1: That's first time I applaud y, I plug lay, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go lair.
Speaker 4: I'm more than I'm more than willing to share my
Speaker 4: losing best. You know I sent these pics in last night.
Speaker 4: You think we're gonna I'm gonna bet these with the
Speaker 4: bookie on Sunday.
Speaker 1: Because you got already bet them. Now, well you're not
Speaker 1: betting these now, you're just telling us you're betting these, right,
Speaker 1: I know?
Speaker 4: And and whatever lines you guys get me in.
Speaker 1: I made my bets today, figured out shake shape shape
Speaker 1: What is money town today? Because it's the show and
Speaker 1: I'm betting for the show. This is what I do.
Speaker 1: I'll get weird on Saturday if I'm being stupid.
Speaker 3: Spend money.
Speaker 1: And I think I'm ahead of the line on a
Speaker 1: few of these. Honestly, Okay, let's sell, let's get ready, Shay,
Speaker 1: you can lead us off with your college football things.
Speaker 3: Wait, Dan, actually, really quick, I have one bad beat
Speaker 3: from the previous week. Okay, that Browns game brown Oh yeah,
Speaker 3: I had the money line, but I did actual take
Speaker 3: the spread as well. Obviously that also lost. But minute
Speaker 3: and a half left down too.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Every scenario almost except for that one, guarantees that you
Speaker 3: cover the spread. And it's just jamis and just true fashion.
Speaker 3: He really is just the best. I love that.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Are you checking your phone for a reason? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm just thinking but my bets. Oh no, nothing else
Speaker 1: going on, Danny. Don't worry? Well, no, I do worry.
Speaker 1: I swear to God. I almost text you just to
Speaker 1: say how you doing for Thanksgiving? Yes? I made it.
Speaker 1: This is my best Thanksgiving. However, last year was bad. Okay,
Speaker 1: but this is this is you and the room Mader. Yeah,
Speaker 1: her Oole family was over the entire family. And do
Speaker 1: they side with you on any of this? No? Nothing, No,
Speaker 1: I mean they appreciate me now, but they don't trust me, okay,
Speaker 1: and they're very you know, I don't know how the
Speaker 1: word I'm looking for liberal. So there are some disagreements,
Speaker 1: and I you know, I promised that I wouldn't speak
Speaker 1: up about anything. Oh, we're not talking about it anymore. No, no,
Speaker 1: we are. I didn't speak up about politics. I didn't.
Speaker 1: Oh you mean to speak up there? You can speak
Speaker 1: up here. I can speak up here.
Speaker 3: Yea.
Speaker 1: They don't. They're not shows way beneath them. They would
Speaker 1: never listen. We're not. We're not saying anything about therapist anymore. No.
Speaker 1: And until she rules against me. The tennis wives, Uh,
Speaker 1: they're going to drink and they're all going to hell.
Speaker 3: Well, once the show's on NPR, your fuck, they're going
Speaker 3: to all listen.
Speaker 1: To it, exactly, Larry. How was your Thanksgiving?
Speaker 4: By the way, I'm fine, No, stress know nothing. It
Speaker 4: was at my sister in law camp, the other sister
Speaker 4: in law that lives over in Brielle Dan where my
Speaker 4: fiftieth birthday party was.
Speaker 1: Oh, Okay, Yeah, I did run into a guy that
Speaker 1: it might be the best drinker that I've ever been
Speaker 1: around at the wedding reception at Larry's daughter's wedding reception. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: this is a guy who was and Larry ranked me.
Speaker 1: Was I third on the list of greatest drinkers that
Speaker 1: You've ever been around?
Speaker 4: You were third? Dan number one is gone.
Speaker 1: So the guy you bet, yeah one, I knocked off
Speaker 1: year two. That's not fair. I'm out. I'm in retirement
Speaker 1: right now.
Speaker 3: You're in. You're more like in uh what remission?
Speaker 1: Remission? Yeah? Yeah, but this guy drank what a case
Speaker 1: of Heineken in two hours, under.
Speaker 4: Two hours and the bet and our bookies, our bookie
Speaker 4: was offering the bet at under four hours and you
Speaker 4: can't drink light beer, and he would do it with anybody.
Speaker 4: And my boy pulls the box, go goes make it
Speaker 4: heine and make it two hours and you got a
Speaker 4: bet at twenty four twenty fours and.
Speaker 1: Just co holy shit. So I meet this guy.
Speaker 4: And he was number two with my fiftieth Thursday.
Speaker 1: By the way, Yeah, yeah, the other guy, the first
Speaker 1: guy knocked off. So I got this guy in front
Speaker 1: of me, and then I met him, talked to him
Speaker 1: a little bit, and uh, he's a big guy, big guy.
Speaker 1: Did you drink with him?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: No, he seemed like he was just having a nice
Speaker 1: little time with him and he.
Speaker 4: Was drinking sipping whiskey that night. Yeah, you should have
Speaker 4: gone whiskey with him, Dan, I guess I don't want
Speaker 4: to do that with I don't want to do bourbon
Speaker 4: with with Dan. No, I'll go budwise with Dan. I
Speaker 4: don't want to go bourbon with Dan.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we know what happened last time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Larry threw up.
Speaker 3: He did not pants?
Speaker 2: What was that?
Speaker 1: Did you ship your pants when you No?
Speaker 4: No, no, no, Okay, I'm not at that age yet.
Speaker 1: Okay, Shay, I'll start with you with your college football bets.
Speaker 1: He had, Danny, I got America plus four and a
Speaker 1: half against the Green Wave. Then I got the over
Speaker 1: in Western Kentucky Jacksonville State. It's fifty eight now, huh
Speaker 1: all right? Uh Clemson I got, dude, I don't know
Speaker 1: how the fuck Clemson plus two and a half against Uh, well,
Speaker 1: why are you.
Speaker 2: Going against SMU?
Speaker 1: First off? Are you a dabo guy? The cocaine trust funds? No,
Speaker 1: I hate Dabo. I think Dabbo's a liar and a cheat.
Speaker 1: And I think the fact that he said he would
Speaker 1: retire if they ever had to pay that, I mean,
Speaker 1: I hate that so much, this Southern Baptist bullshit. I
Speaker 1: think he's a fraud. But I still think they're going
Speaker 1: to win the game. I got the Battle of Northern
Speaker 1: Alabama under forty five UNLV Boise State under fifty eight.
Speaker 1: Keno Bengo, Can we not talk about Miami? I know
Speaker 1: you talked about it today, but am I allowed to
Speaker 1: mention Miami? Am I allowed to? You can? Okay? The
Speaker 1: fact that Duke is not ranked as an sec conspiracy.
Speaker 1: Bama should not have lost to a six and six
Speaker 1: OU team got boat raced by him and they wouldn't
Speaker 1: be on you know, talked about being on the bubble.
Speaker 1: Miami should be in over Bama. Period. Yeah. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: just Duke not being ranked as bullshit. It's complete bullshit. Wait,
Speaker 1: did you have Ohio and Miami of on? Huh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: the Northern Alabama. Ohio is just Alabama with shittier weather.
Speaker 1: Have you been Ohio? I don't. I lived there, I was,
Speaker 1: I was there for Thanksgiving.
Speaker 3: I don't but you don't live there now, Dan Ohio sucks?
Speaker 1: Why is that suck?
Speaker 3: It's Alabama with if you're a state and you have
Speaker 3: to if you have to make.
Speaker 1: Got running water in Ohio.
Speaker 3: It's awful. Seen discussed the commercials for people to move
Speaker 3: to Ohio. It's like it's like de Vrai University if
Speaker 3: you're seeing a bunch of ads for it on TV
Speaker 3: over and over again.
Speaker 1: Since it, I've got questions since night. Columbus and Cleveland
Speaker 1: are better than any city in Alabama. Oh God, by
Speaker 1: the lake, the fuck I haven't. I went to the
Speaker 1: Guardians game and I got a foul ball from Jose Ramirez.
Speaker 1: I have been okay, and they revitalized it and it
Speaker 1: still looks like a shithole. No, Cleveland is Cleveland's great.
Speaker 1: Cleveland's a dump. I stayed in the nicest hotel in
Speaker 1: downtown Cleveland. It was one hundred and eighty nine dollars
Speaker 1: a night.
Speaker 6: That was you wait, is it the enormous like is
Speaker 6: that cameriat.
Speaker 1: I don't know. They're all kinds of buildings they redid
Speaker 1: and there was a rooftop bar at it and it
Speaker 1: was a dump as far as I could see what.
Speaker 3: Are you talking about with Alabama.
Speaker 1: Is such so much better than Ohio. But Alabama doesn't
Speaker 1: try and lie who they are. Alabama sucks. Everybody knows
Speaker 1: that they got really good food in hot weather Ohio.
Speaker 1: I got ship, Orio's got spaghetti chili. Oh yeah, that's
Speaker 1: how about a ham sandwich? Like, you know what they
Speaker 1: got Midwest charms? What they gone?
Speaker 3: The Midwest charm things kind of bullshit.
Speaker 1: You know it's real, but it's not in Ohio. That's
Speaker 1: like might as well be Appalachia. It's in like Minnesota, Iowa, Wisconsin,
Speaker 1: the Dakotas. That's where you find Midwest charm. Ohio is
Speaker 1: just an angry step son who got kicked out of
Speaker 1: the house. Wait talking about dump rather being the Midwest charm. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and your wife falling in love with me? No, that
Speaker 1: was just a snake oil sales. Yeah charm, that was
Speaker 1: I went in there and charmed her. Well listen, I
Speaker 1: charmed her, yeah, because she's never experienced charm. Correct exactly
Speaker 1: that good look. Then you could charm me with a
Speaker 1: pocket of pills too. Okay, I just spike your drink.
Speaker 1: Jingle jingle. Okay, Dylan, you're up next. College football all right,
Speaker 1: unlike Shay I got too against America, although he did
Speaker 1: have Memphis.
Speaker 3: Uh went outright by what ten?
Speaker 1: Yeah, something like that.
Speaker 3: It was a fluke game.
Speaker 1: Okay, so two.
Speaker 3: Minus four and a half Jojia plus two and a
Speaker 3: half against Texas. Dude, I don't that in that Clemson
Speaker 3: game boths.
Speaker 1: I understand the Georgia bet. I do I get it?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I can't. I can't abide. All right,
Speaker 3: I'm running it back with Marshall money line against Louisiana, right,
Speaker 3: plus one seventy and then I got Oregon minus three
Speaker 3: and a half against Penn State. I already feel like
Speaker 3: I'm going to regret this because this seems ratty to me.
Speaker 3: All those games they're tough in Penn State. I mean,
Speaker 3: Penn State should get blown out by Oregon. But at
Speaker 3: this point, who.
Speaker 1: Knows, No, No, I don't know. It's in Indianapolis, right,
Speaker 1: that's another dump state. Indianapolis is a city in the
Speaker 1: dump state. Okay, what what other state is a dump state?
Speaker 1: Oklahoma sucks ass? Okay, Missoo is not really a state.
Speaker 1: It's kind of fake. Same with Kansas.
Speaker 3: Kansas actually is totally fake.
Speaker 1: And the entire Pacific Northwest doesn't exist. It's not real.
Speaker 3: It's like Seattle, Portland, Vancouver.
Speaker 1: You mean Vancouver, Greater Vancouver. Nobody ever goes there.
Speaker 6: What states do you like?
Speaker 1: Texas? You gotta like Texas. I like Texas, Like Connecticut,
Speaker 1: I like Rhode Island. I like Maine, Vermont, New all
Speaker 1: of New England. I like New York, upstate. New York
Speaker 1: is cool. The city sucks. Jersey sucks. Georgia's all right,
Speaker 1: Florida sucks ass, North Carolina sucks. South Carolina's cool.
Speaker 3: South Carolina.
Speaker 1: Pennsylvania's cool, especially the western half where the actual Americans live.
Speaker 3: Not a big silly guy.
Speaker 1: I like Michigan. Michigan's got some good casinos. I like Michigan.
Speaker 1: I love Illinois. That state's a shit show.
Speaker 6: What about Nevada?
Speaker 1: Love Nevada, Give me a break. Reno's the best city. Nevada.
Speaker 1: Don't letnybody tell you different. California sucks, Arizona, No, it sucks.
Speaker 1: New Mexico. Love New Mexico, the enchanted state. Go to
Speaker 1: Santa Fe. Do some shrooms. Go to Georgia. O'keef museum,
Speaker 1: check got the flowers? To Mississippi is awesome. Georgia O'Keefe
Speaker 1: with the flowers. By the way, it's vagina was not
Speaker 1: very well hid.
Speaker 3: It's a pussy dressed as a flower.
Speaker 1: If you wanted to jump in that, lad, she did.
Speaker 4: Okay, Larry to observais from staff say, Western Pennsylvania is
Speaker 4: just like Ohio. Man, you can't like Western.
Speaker 1: Better accent way, better way, better accent way, more culture's way,
Speaker 1: more fracking, good, good, keep it up. We didn't even
Speaker 1: get to Idaho and Utah. Those should be sold back
Speaker 1: to the Indians. I like Utah the entire night off
Speaker 1: the map.
Speaker 3: Minus like the overarming religious theme fanatics.
Speaker 1: Salt Salt Lake is a sneaky.
Speaker 3: Really nature wise, Utah is probably.
Speaker 1: There's a lot going on in Salt Lake. Yeah, a
Speaker 1: lot of rules and regulation. No, there's notine, no, No,
Speaker 1: everybody has fairy tales.
Speaker 3: Told ht midnight you don't want to truck drugs over
Speaker 3: from Colorado and get popped in Utah.
Speaker 1: And then you had these two golden tablets that only
Speaker 1: he could read. When anybody tried to read him, he said, no,
Speaker 1: only I could read him. And the second rule was
Speaker 1: I get more than one wife.
Speaker 3: You don't say in nineteen seventy four.
Speaker 1: I'm sure no physical evident way back in nineteen seventy four. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and Jesus was an Indian. We all know. I'm sure
Speaker 1: your religion has a few skeptical moments. Surefy, but it's
Speaker 1: thousands and thousands of years old. This shit didn't happen
Speaker 1: in the eighties, and nobody can fuck.
Speaker 3: Why did you like better the fight between Michigan Ohio State,
Speaker 3: or like the four Ohigo State players who were praying
Speaker 3: off to the side while it was going on harder?
Speaker 1: Okay, Larry, what else do you have?
Speaker 4: I haven't given you anything yet.
Speaker 1: It feels like we should be wrapping this up.
Speaker 4: I have Oregon minus the three and a half against
Speaker 4: Penn State. I'm as a whole year. I haven't been
Speaker 4: a believer in Penn State, so I'm with you Argon
Speaker 4: minus three and a half and my coll Again, I
Speaker 4: don't have written down here. My college games are one units.
Speaker 4: My pro games are going to be two units. So
Speaker 4: one unit on Oregon minus three and a half and
Speaker 4: just one unit on the under in the Clemson SMU
Speaker 4: game at fifty six and a half. They might only
Speaker 4: two college bets. I'm afraid of Georgia. There's nothing else
Speaker 4: that jumps out at me. I wouldn't bet Louisiana Marshall
Speaker 4: with your money down.
Speaker 1: Okay, back to you with the NFL. All right, Danny,
Speaker 1: I got the fighting Baker. Mayfield is going back to
Speaker 1: the well. I don't care.
Speaker 3: He loved the box.
Speaker 1: I love Baker this year. I love Baker. It's a
Speaker 1: great Baker, good Baker. Niners laying four against the Bears,
Speaker 1: Bill's rams over forty nine and the fighting Kirk Cousins
Speaker 1: five and a half now plus five and a half against.
Speaker 3: Skull returning home. It was six.
Speaker 1: Yeah, revenge game. It was a bounce back game because
Speaker 1: last week was fucking bad.
Speaker 3: Kirk Cousins is totally flipped. He used to kill it
Speaker 3: in the one o'clock slate and be a total sieve
Speaker 3: in primetime and then I feel like it's the complete opposite.
Speaker 3: Now Primetime, Kirk, Primetime, Kirk, you can't stop Dylan. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I'm going with the Lions minus three against the Packers.
Speaker 3: On Thursday night, Dolphins minus six against the Jets. I
Speaker 3: was between this or Jets money line because I'm like,
Speaker 3: this seems like it's such a Jets game to win.
Speaker 1: But it seems like a big dumber Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3: I can't bet on the Jets though, until proven otherwise.
Speaker 3: Rocking with the Browns plus six and a half against
Speaker 3: the Steelers because they're they're kryptonite, and the Chargers plus
Speaker 3: four against the Chiefs. I'm calling it right now. Chiefs
Speaker 3: win by three late field goal.
Speaker 1: But you're not taking the Chargers money line.
Speaker 3: No, I'm going to take the four points squeeze right
Speaker 3: in there.
Speaker 1: Okay, bad Larry? Whoa O Damn Larry? What you got
Speaker 1: a lot of You're about to lose thirty units and
Speaker 1: you've got a lot of bets.
Speaker 4: You three six, seven, eight Pro games all two units
Speaker 4: Saints Monaster five against the Giants. I hear the Dolphins
Speaker 4: are only given six out of the.
Speaker 1: Jets six and a half.
Speaker 4: You just gave six, a Dylan.
Speaker 1: Is it six or six and a half? Right? It's six? Now? Okay,
Speaker 1: just move thet stop.
Speaker 2: I'm looking.
Speaker 4: I'm looking at what I say in the line. My
Speaker 4: line was six and a half when I sent it in.
Speaker 4: I don't care the doll blow them out, sick. You
Speaker 4: just gave Villing, you just.
Speaker 1: Gave Okay, we just Larry. It's sick, got it, It's
Speaker 1: it's six, you.
Speaker 3: Know, Larry want such a good boy. We'll give you five.
Speaker 4: Titans minus the three and a half against the Jags,
Speaker 4: Panthers plus twelve and a half against the Eagles, the
Speaker 4: Browns get plus six and a half against the Steelers,
Speaker 4: the Buccaneers minus seven against the Raiders, the Bears getting
Speaker 4: four from the forty nine Ers and the Chargers getting
Speaker 4: four from the Chiefs, all two units.
Speaker 3: I actually have to root for Larry this week because
Speaker 3: if he does well, I think that basically means I
Speaker 3: do well too.
Speaker 4: I think Ray showed you my picks.
Speaker 3: I couldn't read them anyways.
Speaker 4: They're all just circled up in the postry.
Speaker 3: Maybe we're just both brilliant geniuses.
Speaker 4: We're trying to figure out what's going on in the NFL.
Speaker 4: I can't figure out College out. I can't wait till
Speaker 4: the next week though, when the twelve team start playing,
Speaker 4: because we're gonna have a lot.
Speaker 1: Then Okay, I think that's it. Are you doing the
Speaker 1: podcast this week? Yeah? I think Friday Danny talk about
Speaker 1: the upcoming trip to When are we taken off for
Speaker 1: this show? When does this stop? I have no idea.
Speaker 3: It would be the week of Christmas. Christmas week will
Speaker 3: be off.
Speaker 1: Will I be calling in from Vienna? This is a question.
Speaker 1: When are you going to Vienna twenty first, No, we'll
Speaker 1: probably be off. Yeah, then okay, because college football playoff
Speaker 1: it starts on the twenty. Well, I got to figure
Speaker 1: that out. I gotta like at some point, you know,
Speaker 1: we have to have a little bit of a break here.
Speaker 1: I can't do this every week. Yep. We have to
Speaker 1: get there, I know, but this just is tiring. You
Speaker 1: love it. I hate it, you do. I do. I
Speaker 1: hate it because I come in and I go. I
Speaker 1: gotta entertain. I gotta get the energy up. I got
Speaker 1: to make something out of bad Larry. I gotta navigate
Speaker 1: you keep Dylan sober ish. I mean, there's a lot
Speaker 1: going on here on your shoulders, Danny. I know I
Speaker 1: just had shoulder surgery. Yeah. Why do you think I
Speaker 1: had shoulder surgery? Carrying these schmucks around.
Speaker 3: The other shoulders? Not long?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know it's already been cut on. That was
Speaker 1: where I carried Sports Center for Oh yeah, okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, I might have shoulder surgery coming up on
Speaker 1: my own anyway, for carrying your family. Yeah, and all
Speaker 1: the fucking weight and decisions of mistakes that I've made,
Speaker 1: carrying your your your roommate, carrying my sins with me
Speaker 1: everywhere I go.
Speaker 3: Jesus died for them, now, ye I.
Speaker 1: Got three daughters for a reason.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: Uh So the the podcast uh Shan Irving wherever you
Speaker 1: get your podcasts, perhaps coming out on Friday. I still
Speaker 1: think you and the roommate would be a good podcast. Crazy.
Speaker 1: Don't let her hear that she's going to fucking force it.
Speaker 1: You know what? Maybe I I do doctor Phil Oh okay,
Speaker 1: you guys, I would navigate that with you too. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would do that on a show. Would she do
Speaker 1: it for a podcast? Yeah? I I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think there's an actress still in her that she
Speaker 1: wants to. I don't know if she. I don't know
Speaker 1: if she would because she would get found out. Like
Speaker 1: if if I had a fair therapist, one that no,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't everist. Actually, if you're gonna a therapist know
Speaker 1: how to keep a secret.
Speaker 3: That, I'm not sure the Menendez guys therapist coward.
Speaker 1: Uh. But if I had a one that was fair,
Speaker 1: I think it would be way easier for me. I've
Speaker 1: got this. You know, these preloaded pre judge therapists, they
Speaker 1: see me coming a mile away, and they're super feminists,
Speaker 1: so they just think I'm a piece of shit.
Speaker 3: They that you are.
Speaker 1: No, I'm not. In their eyes, I am. I represent
Speaker 1: all that are evil in their life and things that
Speaker 1: went wrong in a relationship with their dad and all
Speaker 1: this shit. Because I'm not some fucking lay down punk.
Speaker 1: They think I'm a prick. That's it. I'm just a
Speaker 1: normal motherfucker. Danny. Well, normal, you're not normal. I am
Speaker 1: the average man. No you're not. I am the median,
Speaker 1: average American man. No, you're an absolutely, yes, Marvin.
Speaker 6: That tattoo on the side of your head says different.
Speaker 1: I'm an artistic person. I love art, and I just
Speaker 1: figured I put a painting on the side of my head. No,
Speaker 1: the one across to your belly, just to let people
Speaker 1: know where I'm from, Danny, so they can identify the body.
Speaker 1: You're not normal. Normal, you are not.
Speaker 3: If they just recover your torso you're good.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, got him. Yeah, his wife cut off the top.
Speaker 1: This therapist teamed up to murder.
Speaker 3: All the appendages are gone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they both have held the other end of the
Speaker 1: chainsaw there.
Speaker 3: Maybe she'll just do a beheading video.
Speaker 1: She doesn't hostage video. Damn uh On second thought, I
Speaker 1: probably shouldn't, doctor Phil. Between you two could make a
Speaker 1: real difference in my life. I could. If you think
Speaker 1: I could make a difference than I would do it,
Speaker 1: I'll bring it up to the roommate. Okay, Well, because
Speaker 1: this lady don't take insurance, I might as well give
Speaker 1: you an enpartment.
Speaker 7: Is this going to be like a crossover where this
Speaker 7: episode would be on both platforms?
Speaker 1: Well, you guys could gamble on what's going to happen again,
Speaker 1: we could probably mock up some lines with the points
Speaker 1: the roommate's gonna be over under on tiers. You'd have
Speaker 1: to do that, oh, like bive minute. We would have
Speaker 1: to get like a decibel. There'd have to be something
Speaker 1: in there to read the decibels and see how high
Speaker 1: her voice would go.
Speaker 3: Okay, beverage is consumed.
Speaker 1: How how deep do we go in before there's tears? Right? Yeah,
Speaker 1: before there's screaming? Like I think we could come up
Speaker 1: with some lines there and the people could bet on it.
Speaker 3: But then you're gonna have to be fully impartial, because
Speaker 3: we don't want you to dive right in with a
Speaker 3: fucking killer right.
Speaker 1: Off the bat. Good questions. Uh so that's my that's
Speaker 1: my problem. But the problem is that she I mean,
Speaker 1: this could be great for me honestly, because she does
Speaker 1: like you and trust you for some reason. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: why shouldn't she trust me? First off, she doesn't know you,
Speaker 1: Danny a B. She just got charmed, that's it. So
Speaker 1: like it's like any fucking stales, Like she would buy
Speaker 1: life insurance if the guy fucking smiled at her.
Speaker 3: The point remains, and you're an actor. You are an actor,
Speaker 3: a trained liar.
Speaker 1: But you would be on my side obviously, ish, and
Speaker 1: that would help me in my life because she would
Speaker 1: trust your advice, like leave Shay alone.
Speaker 3: I don't know if that's how that would shake out
Speaker 3: at all. What do you mean do you think he's
Speaker 3: on your side?
Speaker 1: I don't think one hundred percent? What the fuck I
Speaker 1: means a couple zeros, it might be fifty one percent
Speaker 1: on your side, No shit. As a man, man to man,
Speaker 1: I mean, I gotta be fair if I'm going to
Speaker 1: judge this, I can't be one hundred percent on your side.
Speaker 1: But you will be once you hear the facts. Danny.
Speaker 1: If I hear the facts, then I would react accordingly.
Speaker 3: You have to go in blank slate, Yes, I have.
Speaker 1: To go in unbiased. And nobody loves love like I
Speaker 1: love life. So on, I'm going to try to bring
Speaker 1: out the best in both of you.
Speaker 3: Once you're going a jack of that therapist rate. Maybe
Speaker 3: ahead of time you can probably
Speaker 1: Well, that'll do it for this week's edition of Dan
Speaker 1: Patrick Takes a Gamble and for Bad Larry, for Shay
Speaker 1: and Irving Dylan the graphics Guy, Picture Day, Ray, Marvin
Speaker 1: and yours truly have a wonderful weekend and we'll talk
Speaker 1: to you next week.