Speaker 1: Boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
Speaker 1: week was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 1: of the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 1: treats crackheads in the ghetto Cutter the same as the
Speaker 1: rich pill poppers in the penthouse the Clearinghouse of Hot
Speaker 1: takes break free for something special. The fifth Hour with
Speaker 1: Ben Maller starts right now. That it does, you know,
Speaker 1: it's it's actually really like the sixth hour of the
Speaker 1: podcast right now as we begin to do this week,
Speaker 1: and there will be no magical tales of me pooping
Speaker 1: my pants on this week's edition of the show. But
Speaker 1: it is the fifth hour available, as you know by
Speaker 1: now because you're listening to the podcast wherever you can
Speaker 1: get your podcast, the global reach of the I Heart
Speaker 1: podcast network, and we are here every week for at
Speaker 1: least one good hour, and during football season we are
Speaker 1: degenerate gambling losers and handicap every literally every game in
Speaker 1: the NFL regular season, unless I get sick and have
Speaker 1: my gallbladder taken out, then we don't do that. But
Speaker 1: it is time to start a new here, and we
Speaker 1: have quite the beginning to mess around with because David
Speaker 1: Gascon has worked his magic yet again, known as Gagon
Speaker 1: on the internet. Here and this is a new record
Speaker 1: for you. Guess now, this is a full hour delay
Speaker 1: in recording the podcast. Congratulations. I think we might have
Speaker 1: actually have to say, like an hour one thirty four minutes. Yes,
Speaker 1: that's about hour and hour and thirty four minutes of delay.
Speaker 1: And to paint the picture here, So I log in
Speaker 1: from the studio that I use into the central studio
Speaker 1: there and the we have a special podcast studio which
Speaker 1: is only really used for podcast and so I I do,
Speaker 1: like I always do, I log in regularly, and I
Speaker 1: hear so I'm like, oh boy, that sucks. You know,
Speaker 1: that's you can't really do a podcast with. So I
Speaker 1: tell guess Gun, I said, hey, it's all it's all
Speaker 1: funked up. You know something's wrong here? And uh and
Speaker 1: what did you tell me? Guess? Do you remember what
Speaker 1: you told me? I said, exercise some patients. I said,
Speaker 1: you felt, well, whatever, I said, why don't you go
Speaker 1: tweet about it and actually quote me on it? I
Speaker 1: will do that, well, I will ask you. At least
Speaker 1: I had the courtesy unlike we'll get to that later.
Speaker 1: But unlike a guy I work with, Eddie Garcia, who
Speaker 1: broke the bubble of trust. I asked you, so I
Speaker 1: did not break the bubble of trust, and I gave
Speaker 1: you the green light. There's no surprise that he would
Speaker 1: try to shop you from the knees from behind. But
Speaker 1: you know in different guys, so it is what, Well,
Speaker 1: that's a different story. You guys stay focused here. So anyway,
Speaker 1: just did okay? So I told you exercise some patients.
Speaker 1: I told you to switch the COMRAX, told me to reconnect,
Speaker 1: because of course you assumed it was my problem. God
Speaker 1: forbid it would be your problem. The lack of force
Speaker 1: I by you. I'm sorry. I'm not an engineer by trade.
Speaker 1: So the fact that I had to bring four different
Speaker 1: engineers in here to get the fucking thing right, and
Speaker 1: it took us ninety four minutes, I would safely say
Speaker 1: that it wasn't on me. Consider the fact that I did.
Speaker 1: I believe it was Becaud. You shouldn't. You should have
Speaker 1: you should have predicted that this was going to happen,
Speaker 1: because there's a problem. Every week, there's some insignificant, irrelevant
Speaker 1: thing that causes major problems. I know, and you'll cover
Speaker 1: this in your own studio during your regular Monday through
Speaker 1: Friday show as well, consider the fact that there's usually
Speaker 1: an arm, a leg, a letter, or trash that's in
Speaker 1: your studios. So I am Mr Sunshine, I don't talk
Speaker 1: about that. I do not. I learned from a program director,
Speaker 1: Bob Bennett, back in the day. One of my early
Speaker 1: program directors, Bow Bennett, taught me that you should never
Speaker 1: talk about what's wrong at the radio station. You should
Speaker 1: only talk about what's working at the radio station. I've
Speaker 1: always followed that creed my entire life. And I love
Speaker 1: radio engineers because I've worked at even I've worked at
Speaker 1: Fox for a long time, I've worked at other places,
Speaker 1: and they all are cut out of the same cloth.
Speaker 1: There's like a certain personality where one becomes a radio
Speaker 1: technical engineer. They feel like snipers, right yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: they're crazy and they all have the kind of the
Speaker 1: same personality. They they they all know all the things
Speaker 1: about Bob's and the you know, the Dow hickeys and
Speaker 1: the watching mccollits, and the gadgets and the gizmos and
Speaker 1: all that crap, and um, it was fascinating just imagining
Speaker 1: and you you actually took some photos you were giving
Speaker 1: photographic play by play as they were literally four four
Speaker 1: engineers to make sure this podcast is up. So hopefully
Speaker 1: people will enjoy the podcast. But it's like brain surgery, right,
Speaker 1: you don't have just one doctor in there. You have
Speaker 1: about four or five different physicians in there, kind of
Speaker 1: going through the different parts of the body, the anatomy,
Speaker 1: the the brain itself. And that's the exactly what we
Speaker 1: had here in a in a studio which apparently had
Speaker 1: just dirt insteade of a patch that connected you to us,
Speaker 1: us to you. Yeah, so what we did is we
Speaker 1: we got to mop out and we were able to
Speaker 1: scrub a dub dub and make that go away. So
Speaker 1: it's very exciting now that we've wasted a good solid
Speaker 1: five minutes on the fact that we couldn't get on
Speaker 1: to do the podcast because of some interference. Now we
Speaker 1: can actually do the podcast. I've decided today not to
Speaker 1: give a rundown, guess because you told me in podcasting
Speaker 1: you don't really need to give a rundown, just do it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's true. I guess in certain podcasts wherever you are,
Speaker 1: I think you traditional to start off with, well, I
Speaker 1: had a great trip last night I did some ayahuasca
Speaker 1: or had some wine. Yes, yes, I killed the buffalo
Speaker 1: buffalo meats. Say it tastes really good? Let me tell
Speaker 1: you something. Yes. And I think the silver lining with
Speaker 1: all of this is that because the technical issues here,
Speaker 1: you were not allowed to patch through a guy from
Speaker 1: the East Coast on today. Oh that's right, Well that's
Speaker 1: what you were referring to. Of course, the great Marcel
Speaker 1: in Brooklyn, who I'm convinced now that the Mallard Militia
Speaker 1: has decided that they are turning our show, that the
Speaker 1: Overnight Show into an episode of Punked and it's who
Speaker 1: can goof on Marcel the most? So, my man, Marcel,
Speaker 1: who I enjoy. I get a kick out of Marcel.
Speaker 1: People are starting to turn on him. He was voted
Speaker 1: the caller of the Year by the Mallard militia. In
Speaker 1: a democracy, the people voted for Marcel to be the
Speaker 1: call of the year. And so he calls me up
Speaker 1: the other night and out of the blue says, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, breaking news. I'll be co hosting the Fifth
Speaker 1: Hour podcast on Friday with Ben Maller. So where is he?
Speaker 1: Guess on where is Marcell? Why is Marcel not here. Well, thankfully,
Speaker 1: we don't cord the podcast on Fridays. We publish on Fridays.
Speaker 1: I thought we recorded this in real time. I thought
Speaker 1: we did this on Friday. We don't know. We don't know.
Speaker 1: Sometimes we do it on Monday, depending on your schedule. No,
Speaker 1: we've never done it on Monday. We've on Sunday or
Speaker 1: Saturday or Tuesday. We have done it on Wednesday. But
Speaker 1: you have you forced me to adjust my schedule to
Speaker 1: kin here to yours and your bedroutine. Yes, yes, a
Speaker 1: total diva. I am the Beyonce Fox Sports Radio to
Speaker 1: accommodate my schedule, Yes, very difficult because normally the way
Speaker 1: this works is the producer of the podcast, we go
Speaker 1: around that person's schedule. That's normally how these things work. Yes,
Speaker 1: different producers are the ones that tend to put on
Speaker 1: the show for the host. You know this point well, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: from Sin to Salvation clearly. But as far as Marcela
Speaker 1: is concerned, I don't know which one of you knuckleheads
Speaker 1: in the mile of Militia told him that he would
Speaker 1: be co hosting the podcast. We have yet to put
Speaker 1: anyone on. I've tried, I've asked I've said, hey, Gascon,
Speaker 1: I've got a whole you know, roll the decks of
Speaker 1: people on my iPhone. I can call up people I've
Speaker 1: met over the years, old players, coaches, media people. We
Speaker 1: can put them on here and we can, you know,
Speaker 1: just do that as the podcast and do an interview.
Speaker 1: We could put callers on. We can have Chris and
Speaker 1: Houston come on and do a segment. We could you know,
Speaker 1: go with the marked a full name guy and his
Speaker 1: neurosis and all that. And you've shot me down every time. No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: I yeah, that's a select group of people I'd love
Speaker 1: to have on as a guest. That includes Kenny Albert,
Speaker 1: Chris Myers. Uh, those are two to come to my
Speaker 1: mind initially. That's right. Guesscon's idea is to use this
Speaker 1: podcast as a vehicle to help enhance his standing media
Speaker 1: are standing. I'm fine, I'm sitting. I'm not even standing
Speaker 1: in media. I'm I'm not mainstream. I'm fine not being mainstream. Now.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't mind it nice TV I pportunity, because that
Speaker 1: would be okay. But right now I'm very happy just
Speaker 1: being in the shadows, hiding out in the darkness of
Speaker 1: the overnight. Now, you're not some dark night that comes
Speaker 1: and saves people at night. I am. I saved people
Speaker 1: from insomnia, Bruce Wayne during the day, and that's that's
Speaker 1: not I am, no, no, no, listen uh the audio superhero. Seriously,
Speaker 1: people are depressed. You don't understand who's listening to the
Speaker 1: radio I do. You can't handle the overnight. You've got
Speaker 1: people that are depressed, they're not happy with their job,
Speaker 1: they've got medical problems going on, they got all kinds
Speaker 1: of things that bring them to the show, and that
Speaker 1: we enlighten them and they get a couple of less
Speaker 1: I think you're one of those people that's on social
Speaker 1: media now and trying to create an anxiety about the coronavirus.
Speaker 1: And so you just mentioned with the amount of depression
Speaker 1: and sickness and flu and all these bad things that
Speaker 1: are happening, you love negative radio because positive radio does
Speaker 1: not resonate. So therefore, the people I do chime in.
Speaker 1: All you do is you continue to salt on the
Speaker 1: wounds of the First of all, the whole point of
Speaker 1: any media is to get a reaction out of people.
Speaker 1: I think that's the reason that this exists. And if
Speaker 1: you're if people don't react, they don't watch or listen.
Speaker 1: So that's obvious human nature is if you know the
Speaker 1: plane lands, it's not a story. If the plane doesn't land,
Speaker 1: it's philm you know, film at eleven, we'll have the details.
Speaker 1: And so that's how it's always worked. But that that's
Speaker 1: not my problem. That's that's the problem of whoever designed
Speaker 1: human beings, These weird cells that we all are. That's
Speaker 1: how it all, you know. And I love these guys.
Speaker 1: There's always one one douche bag in the back of
Speaker 1: the room. There's well, you know, you're too negative, you
Speaker 1: should be more positive. And uh, of course this person
Speaker 1: is the is the the village idiot, if you will,
Speaker 1: in the room. But as far as I want to
Speaker 1: go back to Marcel here because he is he thinks
Speaker 1: he's Edward R. Murrow, breaking new US. You know, Walter Cronkite,
Speaker 1: old school TV guy back in the day. Hear in reality,
Speaker 1: he's a mix of Brian Williams and Jason Blair, is
Speaker 1: what he is. It's it's just fascinating. He he reported
Speaker 1: h that George Washington was killed Marcel did by Charlie Brown.
Speaker 1: That was one of his reports. Apparently he's never heard
Speaker 1: of George Washington or Charlie Brown, and he reported the
Speaker 1: most famous one from our guy, the Milkman in Colorado,
Speaker 1: that the Titanic had just hit an iceberg. So the
Speaker 1: first that the George Washington story came from Robin Vegas.
Speaker 1: The Titanic one came from our friend in Colorado. I
Speaker 1: do not know who set Marcel up saying he was
Speaker 1: going to be a guest on the podcast. But Marcel,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry you're not on the podcast, and it's not
Speaker 1: my fault. I advocated for you. I wanted you to
Speaker 1: be on the podcast, but guesstcons a douche bag over
Speaker 1: there and he would not allow you. I just think
Speaker 1: that we have limited time on this kind of a platform,
Speaker 1: especially when it gets condensed because of technical difficulties, and
Speaker 1: so I think we need to maximize it with good
Speaker 1: quality material as opposed to anything of that sort. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, Uh, just to look back at last week,
Speaker 1: I think the podcast did pretty well, considering most of
Speaker 1: it was talking about shitting. Yeah, the bulk of the
Speaker 1: questions I got from people that liked the podcasts or like,
Speaker 1: what the funk was he thinking keeping his underwear? Yeah?
Speaker 1: People were very disturbed that I kept the soiled underwear
Speaker 1: and was bothered by this, that this is problematic and
Speaker 1: I have some kind of addiction to feces or something
Speaker 1: like that, and no, I don't. I watched them. They're fine. Now.
Speaker 1: That transport was a bit of an issue, but you know,
Speaker 1: once you got through the transport stage, you're all right.
Speaker 1: I was a little caught off guard that your wife
Speaker 1: actually would have come to the defense of the Costco
Speaker 1: employee as opposed to you when you were sampling well
Speaker 1: for example, listening, Uh, let me tell you something about
Speaker 1: the wife. Okay, she is not in the sample game. Okay,
Speaker 1: she's not. She doesn't understand the sample game. She's on
Speaker 1: this like gluten free diet. She can't eat ninety of
Speaker 1: the samples at Costco. And what's happened When I go
Speaker 1: to Costco with my wife, she she shops and I
Speaker 1: stock the samples. That's what I do. I am on
Speaker 1: the prowl for those little mini hot dogs and and
Speaker 1: tacos and all those things. That's what I mean, that's
Speaker 1: where I am. So she doesn't even know what's going
Speaker 1: on with the sample game. She does not, which is
Speaker 1: more the reason why I am just perplexed that she
Speaker 1: would come to the aid of someone providing you with
Speaker 1: free samples and then taking a shot at you as
Speaker 1: opposed to you. That's that's blood right there. Man. Well,
Speaker 1: not see, she wouldn't because, like I said, she wouldn't
Speaker 1: be around me while I'm doing the samples. She would
Speaker 1: be unaware of what's going on. I understand that. But
Speaker 1: hypothetically speaking, she did say, hey, I would come to
Speaker 1: her defense and not bends. Yeah, but she doesn't understand
Speaker 1: the tone of that angry old woman the Costco that
Speaker 1: asked me to buy the product. And uh, you know,
Speaker 1: I I like the Costco sample people. They don't actually
Speaker 1: work for Costco. They subcontract that out, so they're they're
Speaker 1: not Costco employees, but they're certainly not a protected class.
Speaker 1: They're not untouchable at all. Who made them a sacred cow?
Speaker 1: I mean through your job. It doesn't mean just keep
Speaker 1: It shouldn't matter how many samples people take, because you
Speaker 1: gotta keep putting them out anyway. That's exact, you put
Speaker 1: them out all day. Now. The only reason I thought
Speaker 1: for a second of why she would come to her
Speaker 1: defense and not yours is probably because she knows that
Speaker 1: you're frugal, and it took you twenty years to remodel
Speaker 1: the kitchen catastrophe to have that done, so that could
Speaker 1: be one reason. Well, I know you like to lavish
Speaker 1: her with praise, and I don't know why you were
Speaker 1: choosing to do this right now. On the podcast, she
Speaker 1: hates you, by the way. She always says, why do
Speaker 1: you do the podcast with Gascon? Can't you find somebody else?
Speaker 1: She she specifically has said, I'm the beacon of light
Speaker 1: in your life outside of her, and I provide energy.
Speaker 1: It's a dark light. Apparently it's a very dark play.
Speaker 1: That's fine. That's where you're you realize. I know you're
Speaker 1: a narcissist at all, but you are not held in
Speaker 1: the same reverence that you think you're held in. Well
Speaker 1: you're not. You have a very high opinion of yourself,
Speaker 1: That's true. Somebody does have to, might I point out?
Speaker 1: And I don't know if I should say this on
Speaker 1: the podcast or not, but I did have a brief
Speaker 1: conversation with the sheriff, all right, with the chief. Let
Speaker 1: me tell you something. He agrees with the Mallard militia
Speaker 1: that Gascon his kid, uh bad park needs to be punished.
Speaker 1: In fact, I don't know if I should quot him
Speaker 1: or not, but he said he might have to pull
Speaker 1: out his ticket book about that. That'd be actually amazing
Speaker 1: if he can he can do that. You know, he
Speaker 1: a month ago, he gave me some old scripts that
Speaker 1: he was a part of back in the day. Do
Speaker 1: you remember, so my dad showed me some old My
Speaker 1: dad's a pack rat, So he showed me some old
Speaker 1: television scripts that he was actually a part of. He
Speaker 1: had some creative content that was that's used, and so
Speaker 1: he got credit for that with those, the initial pilot
Speaker 1: and a couple of the episodes as well, because he
Speaker 1: worked with you know, Steven Bocho back in the day
Speaker 1: and a couple of these other guys. Once you know,
Speaker 1: people are obviously creating these these uh, these television shows
Speaker 1: that are that are based on you know, cops and
Speaker 1: conflict and whatnot. So, um, so yeah, you can give me,
Speaker 1: you can give me what the chief did say, but
Speaker 1: I will counter that with this. I actually received an email,
Speaker 1: um that was targeted for you that I it came
Speaker 1: to my possession. It said, first, let me say you
Speaker 1: disclaimer disclaimer, disclaimer. Now I'm sure this is gonna be
Speaker 1: very impressive and a remarkable email and put you in
Speaker 1: the finest light. Uh. The if you were to do
Speaker 1: a you know, baskets, like in one basket you have
Speaker 1: the negative email about Gascon, and in the other basket
Speaker 1: you have the positive. The positive. The negative outweighs the
Speaker 1: positive roughly two one. But this, this fan of yours
Speaker 1: specifically said. First, let me say you guys are podcast
Speaker 1: gold listen every week without fail. Been listening to Ben
Speaker 1: for as long as he's been on the radio, lying
Speaker 1: and then points out and g is money in caps
Speaker 1: as a co host. I hope he continue to get
Speaker 1: this done. So, I mean, that's that's great. You gotta
Speaker 1: read the last line there. I'm looking at the email
Speaker 1: right now. Have the inbox up it sound It's signed
Speaker 1: John Gascon. So I guess that's a cousin of yours.
Speaker 1: Has a cousin John Gascon? Is that right? John? And
Speaker 1: my family? Oh no, it's that guy running for the
Speaker 1: l A district attorney, right, George George. Related to George,
Speaker 1: people have been at My wife asked me any relations
Speaker 1: George Gascon? Not at all, because that guy's like anti police,
Speaker 1: right Georgia Gessco. He's San Francisco, so of course they
Speaker 1: probably wants people shipping on the streets all over the place.
Speaker 1: That's what they do in San Francisco, right, Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: pretty much San Francisco. They do it in l A, too,
Speaker 1: So yeah, the entire West coast. There's a streak of
Speaker 1: brown from Seattle all the way to San Diego. Be
Speaker 1: sure to catch live editions of the Ben Maller Show
Speaker 1: weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on Fox
Speaker 1: Sports Radio and the I Heart Radio app. Al Right,
Speaker 1: so I wanted to mention I told this story briefly
Speaker 1: on the radio, but I didn't get into detail. And
Speaker 1: some guys said, hey, can you please on the podcast
Speaker 1: enlighten us on the club what happened at the ballet
Speaker 1: because everyone loves a good ballet story. So years ago,
Speaker 1: when I was doing local radio, and I've told a
Speaker 1: little bit of this story. I don't know if I've
Speaker 1: got into the great detail, but we we I was
Speaker 1: doing a nighttime show in l A. And our sales
Speaker 1: department thought, well, we'll just send these yahoo's anywhere, and
Speaker 1: so we were doing remote broadcas asked, which everyone in
Speaker 1: radio hates everybody. They'll say that. They might lie and
Speaker 1: say they like them, but they hate them because you
Speaker 1: go out there to some restaurant or when you do
Speaker 1: local radio and you do it a night. Back in
Speaker 1: those days, you would go to a restaurant's bars, uh
Speaker 1: you name it businesses, and you would broadcast. You'd set
Speaker 1: up a little card table and you do the show,
Speaker 1: uh and people would come by and stare at you
Speaker 1: like you're a monkey in a cage. Uh, and they
Speaker 1: would look at you and all that and so. But
Speaker 1: I used to do this like for for the first
Speaker 1: few years of my career as a talk show host.
Speaker 1: Three usually three nights a week, Monday night football we
Speaker 1: would do something. Then we do something Thursday and Friday,
Speaker 1: because those were the nights that we could get people
Speaker 1: to pay to have us come through the radio show.
Speaker 1: And one of the people they got to pay was
Speaker 1: a strip club in l a And this guy that
Speaker 1: ran the strip club said, Hey, you know what we're
Speaker 1: gonna do is we're gonna open up a sports bar
Speaker 1: in the back of the strip club. All right, that's
Speaker 1: what we're gonna do, and it's gonna be wonderful, and
Speaker 1: we want to get guys who like sports and you know,
Speaker 1: and strippers to come down right, have a good time,
Speaker 1: knock yourself out. So so anyway, so we get hired
Speaker 1: to do the show from the sports bar in the back,
Speaker 1: and this thing had just opened. Nobody knew about it.
Speaker 1: You had to walk past the strip club to get
Speaker 1: into this place. The funny, that's the funniest thing, right.
Speaker 1: They wanted to get people to bring like their families
Speaker 1: to come have a nice to Philly cheese steak and
Speaker 1: watch a game, but you had to like bring the
Speaker 1: wife and the kids past the entrance of the strip club.
Speaker 1: But anyway, we we did that. The only people in
Speaker 1: there were the ballet dancers. They were on break and
Speaker 1: they to get away from the creepy guys in the club,
Speaker 1: they would walk down to the sports bar and hang out.
Speaker 1: So we're doing the show and the audience is filled
Speaker 1: with strippers on break and the bartenders on break, right,
Speaker 1: And so then the guy's like he's getting upset because
Speaker 1: there's not a lot of people there, and he's like, hey,
Speaker 1: the guy that ran the place comes up. I remember
Speaker 1: he came up to me and I was doing the
Speaker 1: show with Dave Smith, and he says, hey, can you know,
Speaker 1: I think you should interview these ladies. You know, this
Speaker 1: is the largest gentleman's club in the Los Angeles San
Speaker 1: Fernando Valley. I believe is that that that was their
Speaker 1: their title back in the back in the day. So
Speaker 1: it just interview the strippers, you know, because that guys
Speaker 1: will hear a woman's voice, they get all excited. They
Speaker 1: want to come down and see the ladies. Uh and
Speaker 1: so okay, So we go up to the to the dancers,
Speaker 1: the ballet and the strippers, like, hey, can we put
Speaker 1: you on the radio? Like eight of the they were
Speaker 1: like ten of them. They were shuffling in and out.
Speaker 1: Eight of the ten refused because they all gave us
Speaker 1: some version of hey, I you know, I'm just doing this.
Speaker 1: I'm going to U C l A. And I'm just
Speaker 1: doing this for a little extra money. Nobody knows I'm here.
Speaker 1: I don't want to talk on the radio because somebody
Speaker 1: might recognize my voice that kind of stuff, or you know,
Speaker 1: this is just my part time job. I have another job.
Speaker 1: I'm a respected member of the community, you know. But
Speaker 1: they were like like complete horrorsh women that love talking,
Speaker 1: but everyone else they didn't want to talk. And I
Speaker 1: remember that. And the other thing I remember is that
Speaker 1: after and I was single at the time, and we
Speaker 1: would go into the ballet after we got done doing
Speaker 1: the show and they'd let us in. And one time
Speaker 1: I went in there with a TV guy that had
Speaker 1: been working at our radio station, and we walked in
Speaker 1: there and the owner of the strip club was so
Speaker 1: excited to see us. He came. He came running over
Speaker 1: so excited that we're hanging out at his ballet here
Speaker 1: watching the every the activity, the booby shaking, all this.
Speaker 1: So so he comes up to us. He's very guys
Speaker 1: and shakes are handing. Oh man, I'm so happy you
Speaker 1: guys are here. A big fan all of stuff. He
Speaker 1: then proceeds to hand me a couple of vouchers to
Speaker 1: get into the establishment next time, you know, free passes
Speaker 1: or whatever and free drink cards and uh. He then
Speaker 1: hands the TV guy a V I P Gold card,
Speaker 1: So everything is for every time he comes for the
Speaker 1: you know, for like for life. I was so pissed.
Speaker 1: I was like, what an asshole? The memories, Wow, what
Speaker 1: what time of the day was it? I know, as night,
Speaker 1: but is it like eleven o'clock twelve o'clock one o'clock
Speaker 1: because you're a single then, so yeah, so we would
Speaker 1: do the show from that show at night. I think
Speaker 1: was it was seven to midnight, and it was seven
Speaker 1: to eleven for a stretch, and then I think eventually
Speaker 1: it became like seven to ten, but for a long
Speaker 1: time it was seven to midnight. So it was a
Speaker 1: five hour monstrosity and it was all live. The none
Speaker 1: of it was on tape. I know a lot of
Speaker 1: these guys taped their stuff, but this was completely live. Now,
Speaker 1: did you were your frequent visitor of the ballet after that?
Speaker 1: I was not? Um, and I you know, I'm not.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't hate the Ballet. I'll go back
Speaker 1: in the day I used to go with with guys,
Speaker 1: you know, friends of mine would go out. But I
Speaker 1: it's kind of like the equivalent of you would like
Speaker 1: a nice cheese burger and you go and look at
Speaker 1: a cheeseburgers, spin around, you know, and just touch your
Speaker 1: your teeth, but you can't actually bite into you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. It's like going to a steakhouse and
Speaker 1: walking in smelling everything and then having a walk out. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, and you know I get it. I understand,
Speaker 1: you know, otherwise it becomes a worehouse. But but you
Speaker 1: know it's like, you know, it's just like really a waste.
Speaker 1: It's a lot of more. You can't go in there
Speaker 1: and not spend a good chunk of money. Have you
Speaker 1: ever spent a good chunk of money inside of a ballet? Uh?
Speaker 1: Not my money? I have one time I got some
Speaker 1: funny money to play with, but that wasn't my money.
Speaker 1: That was they said, here, you're gonna knock yourself out.
Speaker 1: But that was you know wild That was in Vegas actually,
Speaker 1: and that was a guy that was a fan of
Speaker 1: the show that that hooked us up. What about you,
Speaker 1: gus On? You a big guy, You're a big star.
Speaker 1: I mean, and you know, I was doing another ballet story.
Speaker 1: This is great. This place isn't around anymore the Hollywood Tropicana,
Speaker 1: remember I don't probably don't remember that. I do not.
Speaker 1: So I was leaving in Holly It at the time,
Speaker 1: and this was right near the one oh one freeway.
Speaker 1: I think it's like a warehouse or something like that.
Speaker 1: It's not far away from uh for those that live
Speaker 1: in the Los Angeles area that Tommy's in Hollywood, which
Speaker 1: is on the opposite side. It's it's in that general
Speaker 1: area anyway, so i'm i'm, I'm going with my buddies.
Speaker 1: There were hanging outcause I live in Hollywood and there
Speaker 1: were several TV stations that were just down the block
Speaker 1: l A t V, I think the CBS station, the
Speaker 1: ABC station had at that time, they had their offices
Speaker 1: just down the street. It was hilarious because between the
Speaker 1: six o'clock news and the eleven o'clock news, we saw
Speaker 1: several of the anchors who walked over to kill the
Speaker 1: time between newscasts into the Hollywood Tropicana. It was, and
Speaker 1: that reminds me of of a great story and you
Speaker 1: would you would know exactly who this is, but I
Speaker 1: will not. I want to punt the name any anywhere
Speaker 1: near you. Um. One of my first internships was what
Speaker 1: they local television station here in Los Angeles when I
Speaker 1: was down at San Diego State and it was during
Speaker 1: the summertime and I got off of a shift. I
Speaker 1: don't know if you remember back in the day with
Speaker 1: with how those internships worked, but oftentimes if you were
Speaker 1: in production, you'd be required a log you'd be logging
Speaker 1: game tape of time codes, so like listen the Dodgers
Speaker 1: and the Angels were playing, and you wanted to record
Speaker 1: a highlight, well, you had a log from when that
Speaker 1: sequence started to when it ended. So I did that
Speaker 1: for eight hours a day, three or four days during
Speaker 1: the week during the summertime. One off day, a Saturday night,
Speaker 1: I went with some Boddy's to uh to a Hamburger
Speaker 1: spot off the freeway. It's on the way towards Orange County,
Speaker 1: and across the street from it was a ballet and
Speaker 1: lo and behold, a giant purple bus rolled up with
Speaker 1: a couple prominent sportscasters and uh and yeah, and right
Speaker 1: behind them as they got off, they were still in
Speaker 1: their suits from their from their shows. Right when they
Speaker 1: got off, all of a sudden, behind them was a
Speaker 1: laundry list of of professional dancers that that accompany them
Speaker 1: inside and out. And really, and who is this? You
Speaker 1: want to name some names? So I don't. I said that.
Speaker 1: I said that two minutes ago. I thank you for listening,
Speaker 1: but just maybe you've changed your mind. I have not.
Speaker 1: I would not do that. So this is like a
Speaker 1: Jerry Jones party bus and he's having a good time. Yeah. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: So needless to say, we all walked in together and
Speaker 1: I said, hey, I saw you a couple of hours ago,
Speaker 1: and so nice to see you outside of the work environment.
Speaker 1: That reminds that reminds me of another time. Um, we
Speaker 1: were doing a remote at there's this the sports bar
Speaker 1: in Santa Monica and we were you know, five hours
Speaker 1: just it was crazy. Um, And we're hanging out in
Speaker 1: Santa Monica doing this thing. And at the near the
Speaker 1: end of the show, I go over to the bar
Speaker 1: area and I see someone I recognize who was a
Speaker 1: big sports anchor at one of the TV city Yeah. Again,
Speaker 1: he's all about TV people I've known. So this guy,
Speaker 1: this guy is a TV anchor, like a sportscaster in
Speaker 1: l A who is completely ship faced drunk at the bar. Right.
Speaker 1: Just I mean he's like probably shipping his pants and
Speaker 1: the whole thing. It's so so Anyway, he sees me,
Speaker 1: and I see him, and he even though he is
Speaker 1: completely intoxicated, right, I mean, this guy is not just drunk,
Speaker 1: there's this not He is so boozed up and schnockered
Speaker 1: that it's amazing he can even breathe at this point. Right. So,
Speaker 1: but he sees me, and this drunken stupor he's mallard
Speaker 1: if you mentioned anything about this, so the radio, I
Speaker 1: have you killed? That's good? Now who was this again? Oh,
Speaker 1: I'll tell you in the sixth hour, which I think
Speaker 1: this is now the sixth hour. But I love that
Speaker 1: booze induced anger, you know, I love that. And we've
Speaker 1: talked about before. And I studied as I do the
Speaker 1: show at night during the weekend and really not so
Speaker 1: much during the week because I think most people during
Speaker 1: the week are working, you know, factory jobs, driving trucks,
Speaker 1: police officers, whatever, they've got jobs or not complete drunks.
Speaker 1: But I did the weekend overnight. It was nothing but
Speaker 1: alcoholics that we're calling me up NonStop, right, just feeling
Speaker 1: no pain and all that stuff and seeing the pink
Speaker 1: spiders whatever you want to say. So so I know
Speaker 1: there's like, there's four types of drunks. Do you know
Speaker 1: the four types of drunks, guest guard, we went over
Speaker 1: us once. I don't you don't remember. It's like the
Speaker 1: pleasant or the the Hemmingway, which is the same whether
Speaker 1: they're drunk or not drunk. That's the Hemingway. Drunk, there's
Speaker 1: the Mary Poppins. They're the ones that get nicer and happier.
Speaker 1: They're the ones that are typically a schmuck, and then
Speaker 1: they have a couple of pops and they're hugging you
Speaker 1: and then oh I love you. So then there's the
Speaker 1: nutty professor who becomes more social. Now I generally am
Speaker 1: the nutty professor. I don't become sweeter and happier, but
Speaker 1: I am more open to talk when I have a
Speaker 1: couple of pops. And then there's the Mr Hyde, which
Speaker 1: is what that TV guy I just reference was where
Speaker 1: you become hostile and you want to fight everyone when
Speaker 1: you have a couple of shots of booze. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: would imagine that guy that probably went up to you
Speaker 1: was probably like five ft seven, five ft eight top
Speaker 1: off to so, oh yeah, they're all they're not that
Speaker 1: five Yeah, I mean I would have I would have
Speaker 1: just smashed them. I just would have. It would have
Speaker 1: been over anyway. All I do it. I got grab bag.
Speaker 1: You have something else I do? Um, And I gotta
Speaker 1: get your opinion on this too. Um. I went to
Speaker 1: a went to a convention last week. I know that
Speaker 1: we had talked about possibly, you know, getting you out
Speaker 1: to to uh Goodwin Field for cal State Fullerton and Tulane. Uh,
Speaker 1: you said you want to participate in the extravaganzas, so
Speaker 1: you missed some good baseball are Well what what did
Speaker 1: I actually say? Uh? You said, no, I don't want
Speaker 1: to do ship with you if it's free. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: I said I. I said, the free pro bono work
Speaker 1: that I do stops at this podcast. Yeah, that's exactly
Speaker 1: what you said, so exactly. So I bring that up
Speaker 1: because this prior to me going to those three games
Speaker 1: to call him. I went to the Anaheim Convention Center
Speaker 1: for the first time. Oh, I used to hang out there.
Speaker 1: I watched when I was a kid. That's the first
Speaker 1: place I ever saw a professional wrestling. Really, yes, it was.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's better now. I also covered
Speaker 1: a Clipper game. The Clippers played the Utah Jazz were
Speaker 1: during the l A Riots and they couldn't play at
Speaker 1: the Sports Arena, so they moved moved a game. I
Speaker 1: think it was only one game, but they moved it
Speaker 1: to the Anaheim Convention Center. Okay, this is my first time,
Speaker 1: so you'll you'll know exactly what I mean by this. Then, Um,
Speaker 1: I went to an event They're called dream Hack and
Speaker 1: it's basically that a story about your career kind of yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: pretty much. But ben I, it's a it's an e
Speaker 1: sports gaming convention that was for seventy two hours. And
Speaker 1: I say seventy two hours because that's exactly what it is.
Speaker 1: It didn't stop. It went from uh Friday morning until
Speaker 1: Sunday night, and they didn't close the doors for anyone
Speaker 1: that was involved in this. But you go to the
Speaker 1: top floor the of these this convention and there's different
Speaker 1: rooms that have like independent video games. They have Fortnite
Speaker 1: that was there. They had Madden that was there, they
Speaker 1: had NHL that was there. Uh, they had a bunch
Speaker 1: of games, Call of Duty, all this stuff that was
Speaker 1: going on, but different tents for all these different things.
Speaker 1: It was almost like Super Bowl week for the media.
Speaker 1: And then ben I go downstairs underneath to the second
Speaker 1: floor and this was like something out of the Matrix
Speaker 1: I ship you not. The entire room was black. It
Speaker 1: was a giant auditorium, but then you see green lights
Speaker 1: everywhere with computer monitors and gaming consoles and it was
Speaker 1: just kids and adults everywhere locked into a game playing
Speaker 1: video games like that was it. And then there was
Speaker 1: you were in a video game convention. But I know,
Speaker 1: but they were talking about launching new games and some
Speaker 1: of the material that they use, they use it for
Speaker 1: competitions and people were winning money. But like I kid
Speaker 1: you not, there were parents. I I assume you went
Speaker 1: to this because you you were looking to gain something
Speaker 1: out of it? Did you gain employment? I gained some
Speaker 1: some information and I gained some contacts. I do a
Speaker 1: lot of networking and so rubbing some rubbing, some elbows,
Speaker 1: shaking some hands, hopefully not contracting the coronavirus. I did
Speaker 1: a little bit of that. Then I'm just I'm amazed.
Speaker 1: Can say I am not opposed to being the Joe
Speaker 1: Rogan of the video game business and interviewing the guys
Speaker 1: right after they get done playing the video game. But
Speaker 1: how about this, though, what about the people that dress
Speaker 1: up as characters like they were they had you talking
Speaker 1: about like the furries, No, they were there was. They
Speaker 1: have like it's called costplay, but basically women and men
Speaker 1: will dress up as video game characters and then play
Speaker 1: that game in that costume on site. So if you
Speaker 1: go back to like like there would be like imagine
Speaker 1: playing tomb Raider and someone next to you is Laura Croft,
Speaker 1: like she's decked out with some Daisy Duke shorts and
Speaker 1: a short top and you know, fake pistol and her
Speaker 1: and her holster, or you know, guys playing Street Fighter
Speaker 1: is like Kennan Ryu all this stuff. They were people
Speaker 1: dressed up as video game characters. It was just surreal.
Speaker 1: And then it's kind of like you. I mean, you
Speaker 1: go in there and you dress up like Howard's Stern
Speaker 1: one day, your hero Colin Cowherd the next day. Little
Speaker 1: dress up which had calling had some great takes earlier
Speaker 1: this week, and I'm sure you share those to you
Speaker 1: and I think we should talk about those at one
Speaker 1: point during this podcast. Yeah. Absolutely. But it was just
Speaker 1: amazing how in this area alone to be kids locked
Speaker 1: into playing video games and on the outside area that
Speaker 1: their parents just sitting down waiting and watching their their
Speaker 1: kids play. Yeah. Man, I think it's great. You know,
Speaker 1: when I was a kid, I'm of the generation where
Speaker 1: you know, when you played video games and they started
Speaker 1: becoming really cool when I was a kid, and they're
Speaker 1: amazing now. They're like next level. I had like Duck
Speaker 1: Hunt and uh Super Mario Brothers, Mario Kart, the original
Speaker 1: Mario kart games like that. But the games today are
Speaker 1: so much better. But every parent when I was a kids,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, you're not gonna do it, and you're gonna
Speaker 1: be a loser if you play video games. And I
Speaker 1: remember we had a guy in the mallar Militia from
Speaker 1: Boston who's I think eighteen years old, and he is
Speaker 1: a professional video game player and he's making I think
Speaker 1: he's making over a million dollars a hear, making more
Speaker 1: than me, a lot more than me. And he they
Speaker 1: moved him to l A, to some gaming house and
Speaker 1: he just plays video games for you know, ten hours
Speaker 1: a day or whatever. We'll see. That's why I went
Speaker 1: out there because you look at a lot of the
Speaker 1: independent game manufacturers and part of the reason is is
Speaker 1: because they always need voiceover talent for characters for narration,
Speaker 1: and uh, you know that's why I had gone and
Speaker 1: talked to some people and filming things out. And yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just amazing to me that we spent so much
Speaker 1: time back in the day with it's like Tech Mobile
Speaker 1: or Double Dribble or Blades of Steel or Mike Tyson's
Speaker 1: Punch Out and then obviously to Madden and then will
Speaker 1: be the show. And yeah, now these kids are making
Speaker 1: you know, five six seven figures annually just by staying indoors.
Speaker 1: Not I don't know if you're down with that. I
Speaker 1: don't know if you would be comfortable with that. Um,
Speaker 1: I hate going outside. I don't like going outside at all.
Speaker 1: I mean, occasionally I'll go to feed ducks because I'm
Speaker 1: an old Asian man and I like feeding ducks. But
Speaker 1: other than that, no, fair enough. Well do you like
Speaker 1: that cliche that I the stereotype that I yeah, I know, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I got it, I got all right, let's go to
Speaker 1: grab back. We have actual questions from actual listeners. Nothing
Speaker 1: from Marcela, right, I do not believe. Okay, there's any
Speaker 1: compliments from from many of the listeners. We'll get to that.
Speaker 1: We'll get to that. We'll get to that. Here's one
Speaker 1: from Balls fan Jimmy and Middle Tennessee. He says, Ben,
Speaker 1: did you panic when you ship your pants? Twenty minutes
Speaker 1: before the show? I have listened to the pot That
Speaker 1: podcast every night this week and I still laugh. That
Speaker 1: is my warm up until the overnight show comes on.
Speaker 1: But that Jimmy really loves hearing about my demise. I
Speaker 1: didn't really panic because I mean, I figured the worst
Speaker 1: case scenario is I'll just I'll do the commando thing.
Speaker 1: And I mean because I knew that I've had the
Speaker 1: gall bladder out since last November. And usually once I
Speaker 1: get the ships, I'm that's it. I'm good. I just
Speaker 1: have to go one time and then that's it. It It
Speaker 1: doesn't usually kick back in. But I didn't really panic.
Speaker 1: You should have the fact that you had to go
Speaker 1: to the fourth floor and Ralph led to your demise
Speaker 1: was a thing of beauty. I think that's the best
Speaker 1: part about all of that. Well, again, the worst part
Speaker 1: for me was I turned the corner and I that's
Speaker 1: like a running back at the twenty yard line and
Speaker 1: you have nothing but open field in front of you,
Speaker 1: and you see the end zone, the goal line, and
Speaker 1: before you can even get there, you fumble the ball
Speaker 1: out of bounds. You know. It's that kind of thing.
Speaker 1: R J writes and says, what meal can you cook
Speaker 1: the best? None J? Well, listen, I make an amazing pizza,
Speaker 1: Philly cheese steaks with pizza. I would say the top
Speaker 1: three the Philly cheese steak, the pizza, and Fahita's Love
Speaker 1: the fahita. I chopped that chicken up, put the bell
Speaker 1: peppers in their little garlic on top, throw some other
Speaker 1: things in wonderful apps. I make the great I I
Speaker 1: I got to open a Mexican restaurant just to serve fajitas. No, yeah,
Speaker 1: you're interesting. No, you're You're cooking is very sleazy. My
Speaker 1: cooking is legendary. No it's not. You don't cook for
Speaker 1: the masks as you cook for yourself. Because you're the
Speaker 1: only person that would eat that ship. I'd like you
Speaker 1: to know that my wife eats that. Most of that does.
Speaker 1: Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Speaker 1: Show weekday said two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific. Jim
Speaker 1: from Kentucky writes, you don't cook anything. Guess you know
Speaker 1: said the dog food that you serve up. I guess
Speaker 1: Gon's idea of cooking is a hungry man's idea of
Speaker 1: set you a picture on Monday night. And do you
Speaker 1: remember what you said to me that is so west
Speaker 1: of the four oh five cooking right there? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: because it was just a plate of it. It was disgusting.
Speaker 1: It was it was jackfruit that I had broiled fruit.
Speaker 1: The only people you need jackfruit or jackasses. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: don't don't be hating on my food. I'm not hating
Speaker 1: on your food. I'm just pointing out I'm a man
Speaker 1: of the people. I I represent the majority. You're in
Speaker 1: the minority. You're in the elitist west of the fours.
Speaker 1: This took time to prep, which I did much like
Speaker 1: what I do on radio and television. Um, I do
Speaker 1: a lot of Let me, let me get my little
Speaker 1: violin out. Can I get my little tiny violin out here?
Speaker 1: You could do that. I chopped up green peppers. Are
Speaker 1: bell peppers? Excuse me? I had onions. I had tomatoes
Speaker 1: at cilantro. I had some salsa. This thing was, This
Speaker 1: thing was a plus. You would have eaten it, for sure.
Speaker 1: I know your wife would have saying my praises at me.
Speaker 1: Those are just one of many things that I can cook.
Speaker 1: And I think I think you need to take note
Speaker 1: because you've done a great job over the last six
Speaker 1: seven months of losing weight. I think this will put
Speaker 1: you over the top. Yeah, no, I'm good. See what
Speaker 1: I'm doing is the inter minute fasting. And you don't
Speaker 1: have to eat that crap and you can still lose weight.
Speaker 1: That's that's fine, because then you can eat like ship
Speaker 1: and then ship. You're on yourself. Why you go to
Speaker 1: I didn't ship because of how I was eating. I
Speaker 1: ship because of because you know everything. Listen, Dr Gascon,
Speaker 1: you dummy, let me explain something to you. Okay, when
Speaker 1: you have you don't understand this because I'm in a
Speaker 1: special class, all right, protected class. I should get a
Speaker 1: manicap placker because I don't have my gall bladder anymore.
Speaker 1: But let me let me explain, all right, it doesn't
Speaker 1: matter when when you fast and have your gall bladder out,
Speaker 1: you could literally eat the healthiest dish in the world
Speaker 1: of nothing but vegetables, and you were still going to
Speaker 1: have to ship your pants or as quickly as possible,
Speaker 1: because within half an hour to an hour, it hits you.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, I I speak from experience, a gym
Speaker 1: from Kentucky. Right, since says, two years ago, my wife
Speaker 1: also had a gall bladder room. See that I am
Speaker 1: bringing in the gall bladder removed group of the audience. Uh.
Speaker 1: And then he says, since I have gone sixty I
Speaker 1: have gone sixty one and a thirty mile zone to
Speaker 1: avoid an unromantic situations. Apparently his wife had the same
Speaker 1: thing I had happened. And then he says, what's the
Speaker 1: worst case scenario? You will break a law for the
Speaker 1: unavoidable inevitable. Uh So, I think what he's asking here
Speaker 1: is like, what laws would you break to avoid shitting
Speaker 1: in your pants? Yeah? Um, well, I would like run through.
Speaker 1: I would treat red lights like stop signs. Um, you
Speaker 1: know at night, you know you can do that at night.
Speaker 1: During the day, you really can't do that. You get smashed.
Speaker 1: That's I mean, we're in l A. You can do
Speaker 1: this in l A and San Francisco with no regard.
Speaker 1: Oh what people do? Yeah right, people do go through
Speaker 1: and but but ye know, I think that's about it.
Speaker 1: I mean we go through some red lights. Obviously, speeding
Speaker 1: does it work like if you're speeding to the hospital?
Speaker 1: You know that cliche and Hollywood movies, the TV or
Speaker 1: movie trope where the guys driving to take his pregnant
Speaker 1: wife to the hospital and he gets pulled over and
Speaker 1: the police are no, I'm not gonna give you a ticket,
Speaker 1: I'll give you an escort to the hospital. Don't actually
Speaker 1: happen in real life? Or is that just than the movies?
Speaker 1: You know what? For the sake of of this podcast.
Speaker 1: I hope we can be in the same general facinity
Speaker 1: when this happens to you. It could be in the
Speaker 1: car and something can bad can happen to you, and
Speaker 1: I need to hit the gas. I'll tell you what,
Speaker 1: when you pay off the Super Bowl bet that you
Speaker 1: lost and buy me Titos tacos. And if I'm an
Speaker 1: hour away from where I need to be, you can
Speaker 1: watch fast going into that. You can you can be there.
Speaker 1: That bet was for for race day at Santa Anita.
Speaker 1: I changed it to Tito's Tacos after the fact. I
Speaker 1: changed it to Tito's Tacos. That's embarrassing, all right, But
Speaker 1: I would like to go to the track, but you're
Speaker 1: always working the day that works to go to the track.
Speaker 1: I guess maybe next next week we can maybe go
Speaker 1: to the go to the track. We can figure it out. Uh.
Speaker 1: Let's see. Brian from north Bridge, Massachusetts rights and he says, Ben,
Speaker 1: I am wondering how no talent, thin skin bad at
Speaker 1: parking do she mcdouche bag gascon can even keep job
Speaker 1: in radio? Your thoughts, well, it's easy, it's uh. He
Speaker 1: asked for my thoughts, not your thoughts. Well he should
Speaker 1: ask for my thoughts. Well, you have photos of people
Speaker 1: with farm animals, isn't that how you had I wouldn't
Speaker 1: be here with you big dogs and peanut butter. Yes, no,
Speaker 1: oh boy. Uh here's the one from Rick in Beantown
Speaker 1: in Boston. He says, have you ever been doing Asian
Speaker 1: massage parlor? Uh? No, I have not, Rick, Um not
Speaker 1: gotten to that particular moment in my life. I'm not
Speaker 1: looking down on other people, but I don't. I don't
Speaker 1: really like strangers like massaging me. I know that's not
Speaker 1: really a real massage that it's more like a tug
Speaker 1: and rub situation. But I we had a sponsor years ago.
Speaker 1: There was this Dace bab You mentioned a Dace Bass
Speaker 1: sponsoring a sports radio show. Doesn't seem like the target demographic,
Speaker 1: but they were trying to get guys if they get
Speaker 1: the male demo and they'd come to the day spots
Speaker 1: or whatever. Um, so they kept. They really were badgering
Speaker 1: me to get a massage like a full like they
Speaker 1: wanted to show how they were so proud of their business.
Speaker 1: They wanted to show me how great these massages are.
Speaker 1: And I would never allow him to do it. Because
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't watch some weird dode touching my
Speaker 1: you know whatever. So I never did it. But that
Speaker 1: was just like a regular massage. But the furthest I've
Speaker 1: gone with my wife when she's getting the many and
Speaker 1: the petty, I'll have my toes tickled. That's about it.
Speaker 1: What about the time massage places where they have they
Speaker 1: do like hands and feet and then your scalp. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I do don't think he's talking about that. I think
Speaker 1: we just talking about I know I've never been. Have
Speaker 1: you been to those? Yeah, they have a bunch of those,
Speaker 1: and like, you know, what's the five clothes? Do you
Speaker 1: ask for the special menu? No, I do not ask
Speaker 1: you special menu. No, but I've I've gone with females
Speaker 1: in the past that have taken me and they rave
Speaker 1: about it. And then yeah, it's always amazing. You have
Speaker 1: a all little woman that's five ft one five ft two,
Speaker 1: like stepping on your back and kneeing you and grinding
Speaker 1: on your and your muscles and getting out the kings
Speaker 1: and the knots and all that stuff. So yeah, it's
Speaker 1: for bucks. It's a deal, man. I'm good, Um, I'm good.
Speaker 1: Carlos In Houston writes, and he says, what is both
Speaker 1: of your guys favorite types of beer and alcohol? Uh?
Speaker 1: From cause? What Carlos. I've become a bit of a
Speaker 1: teetotaler in recent years, but back in the day, I
Speaker 1: would pretty much drink any beer. Lately, I I only
Speaker 1: drink a couple of times a year, and I am
Speaker 1: such a lightweight. My favorite beer is root beer beer
Speaker 1: because it tastes like root beer, and it's got a
Speaker 1: high alcohol content, higher than normal beer, and it's filled
Speaker 1: with sugar, and it's delicious and wonderful. It's not what's
Speaker 1: it called, not your father's or not your neighbors or
Speaker 1: something like that, grandfather's I don't remember exactly what it's
Speaker 1: goes something along those lines, and it's it's wonderful. Well,
Speaker 1: you're a big drinker. You like high end alcohol. I do,
Speaker 1: but I like whiskey, so I like McCallan like whiskey Scotch.
Speaker 1: My favorite beer. Actually, one of my sisters introduced me
Speaker 1: to um. It's by a company that's based out in Florida,
Speaker 1: and I don't know the exact pronunciation for it, but
Speaker 1: it's called I call it, or she calls it Jily
Speaker 1: and it's this. It's this pale ale and ben. It
Speaker 1: tastes delicious. It's an Indian pale l and I believe
Speaker 1: it's seven two two percent or seven point five. But
Speaker 1: I went to a hotel that was down there, so
Speaker 1: my sisters showed me around town and the bartender had it.
Speaker 1: He was showcasing it for a bunch of other people.
Speaker 1: My sister says, you don't want that beer, and I
Speaker 1: said why, and she said, because it's so strong that
Speaker 1: I have a couple of them. You're on your ass.
Speaker 1: And so I asked the bartender. I was like, hey,
Speaker 1: is this true? And he's like, I actually had three
Speaker 1: of them last night, and I had a bad hangover
Speaker 1: this morning, and I had it and it was delicious.
Speaker 1: It's an Indian pale ale. It's in a green can,
Speaker 1: so it almost looks like, I don't know, like not
Speaker 1: like squirt um, but it's like a green can, green
Speaker 1: and yellow can. It tastes good. It's it's a delicious beer.
Speaker 1: It's not filling, but circling all the way back. I
Speaker 1: like McCallen, like McCallen twelve account fifteen. The double castles
Speaker 1: are always good. I don't get in that mode anymore
Speaker 1: of drinking a lot. So most of my friends are
Speaker 1: all married and boring and all that ship. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I gotta pro tip for you. If you ever go
Speaker 1: out with Gascon and you offer to buy a round
Speaker 1: of drinks, don't do it. We me and the wife
Speaker 1: are still trying to pay off the booze that he
Speaker 1: asked for at a club in Hollywood. First of all,
Speaker 1: you know, typically I know you don't understand social graces. No, no,
Speaker 1: I don't say. First, I'm not done when somebody offers
Speaker 1: to buy a round of drinks, if you don't ask
Speaker 1: for the most expensive drink at the bar, because if
Speaker 1: you do, you're a schmuck. And that's exactly what you did. Know, Okay,
Speaker 1: it's alcohol and any kind of liquor at a bar
Speaker 1: or lounge these days is usually about fifteen and sixteen dollars.
Speaker 1: That's exactly what I did. And for the record, I
Speaker 1: didn't care what I bought. You guys, I didn't look
Speaker 1: at the price tag. I'm not frugal like you. I
Speaker 1: don't give a ship. It's just it's just money. It's
Speaker 1: just just money. Listen, you say that I got you know,
Speaker 1: I just got a twenty dollar debt on a new kitchen.
Speaker 1: That's your problem, not mine, well exactly and so, but
Speaker 1: you made it my problem because the most expensive goddamn
Speaker 1: drink at the fucking bar. Oh I definitely did not.
Speaker 1: If you look up McCallan twelve on a menu in
Speaker 1: a bar or a lounge, you'll see that it's the
Speaker 1: lead price. I mean, what a douchebag you even know
Speaker 1: what that is? Of course, all right, Dan, and call
Speaker 1: shut up Dan, and Kalamazoo rites and says, who's gonna
Speaker 1: replace gag On when he gets the coronavirus? And can
Speaker 1: that happen soon? Also, how's the kitchen coming along? Well, Dan,
Speaker 1: the kitchen's almost done. A fucking loser, we have we
Speaker 1: have the kitchen sink in um where there was a
Speaker 1: setback with the the back splash. But hopefully it'll be
Speaker 1: completely finished. I thought it was already been done. But
Speaker 1: hopefully by next week, maybe even by the end of
Speaker 1: this weekend, it'll be done. Jianna in Salt Lakes. As
Speaker 1: I listened to both podcasts daily, I am not a
Speaker 1: fan of Gascon, but Gascon Janna says that she says
Speaker 1: that he seems like less of a douche tool than Cooper.
Speaker 1: Loop says, this is not a question, just an opinion,
Speaker 1: but I appreciate the both shows. All right, Well, thank
Speaker 1: you Janet, very guide. You you able you were able
Speaker 1: to attack both Gascon and Coop at the same time.
Speaker 1: Great job, Thanks for your valuable opinion. Thanks for your
Speaker 1: contribution by clicking on this for sixties seconds. Nice nice
Speaker 1: woman there in Salt like all right, Jason and Rocky
Speaker 1: Mount writes in Rocky Mount, Virginie says, been for both
Speaker 1: of you. Have you ever been hornswaggled into trying a
Speaker 1: new food and regretted it? Of course pre gallbladder removed. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't usually try new foods. I'm at the age
Speaker 1: where I pretty much know exactly what I like and
Speaker 1: very rarely, very rarely will I try some new things. Occasionally,
Speaker 1: my wife will get me to try something like call
Speaker 1: a flower or some weird crap like that that I'll just,
Speaker 1: you know, say it's disgusting, But but normally no. Um.
Speaker 1: I am a creature of habit, and I've gotten to
Speaker 1: the age where I know what tastes good and what
Speaker 1: doesn't taste good, and I pretty much stay in my lane.
Speaker 1: As they say, what do I guess? Gon, of course,
Speaker 1: you're an elitist West of the four h five guy,
Speaker 1: so you probably try all kinds of new foods and
Speaker 1: like to brag your friends about all the new things
Speaker 1: you're trying because you're so woke. I'm definitely not woke.
Speaker 1: I uh, this is years ago, but I'd gone on
Speaker 1: a date and this congratulations. Was it with a woman? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was with a woman. Um she was a big
Speaker 1: seafood type of a woman, and she recommended I try squid.
Speaker 1: Not a fan of it. I actually like nearly threw
Speaker 1: up it was it was that bad, you think. I mean,
Speaker 1: I I look at squid as that like the texture
Speaker 1: of it, and I want no part of that, of course,
Speaker 1: but I kind of like to try everything once in life,
Speaker 1: so I didn't reject everything, really well, nearly every You
Speaker 1: can take that to the extreme, guest guys, well, of course,
Speaker 1: I mean I'm not gonna flying it. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: be flying first class to China anytime soon. So alright,
Speaker 1: moving on brief from the o C. I think you
Speaker 1: know this person says, if you had a choice of
Speaker 1: ranch being illegal or guess I'm not being able to
Speaker 1: park in the structure ever again, so you'd have to
Speaker 1: park on the street like the interns do. Which would
Speaker 1: you choose this by the one of our former interns,
Speaker 1: guest and let's see the the answers. I'd rather have
Speaker 1: guest On park out on the street so his car
Speaker 1: can get broken into. Again. That's that's what I would
Speaker 1: like to see happen. Are uh and make ranch illegal
Speaker 1: from the shores of Maine all the way to Hawaii
Speaker 1: and Alaska everywhere in between. App So about that though,
Speaker 1: That's that's what she remembers from her internship, is that
Speaker 1: she had to park on the street. Concern the fact
Speaker 1: that you don't park down the street next to the
Speaker 1: studio at the park blocks down from the studio. In
Speaker 1: order to get here as an interview, you have to
Speaker 1: cross several major streets with a bunch of drunk drivers
Speaker 1: running around. It's just good time. Even part time employees
Speaker 1: had to park down the street from the studio, which
Speaker 1: is absurd. But yeah, I want to point out that
Speaker 1: this was a big accomplishment, Like I felt like I
Speaker 1: had arrived at Fox Sports Radio because I originally had
Speaker 1: to park in that parking lot where you walked out
Speaker 1: of the building, walk down a block, across the street,
Speaker 1: crossed another street, walk down three more blocks, and then
Speaker 1: you got to the parking lot and um, but then
Speaker 1: they finally gave me the parking in the main building. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was like, well now I've arrived. Listen. I don't
Speaker 1: really appreciate the fan that breefe sucking up to you.
Speaker 1: I know that you're a big fan of hers, and
Speaker 1: she's a big fan of mine, but I really don't
Speaker 1: know you're a big fan of hers based on your Instagram.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's see that the follow her on there?
Speaker 1: What's that? Colleagues? I talked to everybody in Turns part
Speaker 1: time from time right now that Bree puts up with you.
Speaker 1: But she wanted an intern on the show, on our show,
Speaker 1: but what not allowed because we do an overnight show.
Speaker 1: No interns allowed. Unfortunately, she'd probably get here a little
Speaker 1: too early, probably, Yes, you get it's a bad look
Speaker 1: when the intern gets there before the producers. It's uh.
Speaker 1: Then she'd end up like producing the show. And oh
Speaker 1: it's funny, all right, Mark and Ottawa writes, and he says,
Speaker 1: if you had to pick one, which would it be?
Speaker 1: Number one? Getting kicked in the nuts one time. Number
Speaker 1: two getting plunged in the face twice, or number three
Speaker 1: drinking half a gallon with delicious ranch dressing. All right,
Speaker 1: this one's easy. I got a pretty big face and
Speaker 1: a pretty powerful face, so I wouldn't mind being punched
Speaker 1: in the face a couple of times. I think that
Speaker 1: would be fine. I would love to see one of
Speaker 1: those Russian slap competitions. Oh yeah, yeah, that would be
Speaker 1: I'd be fine with that if you want to slap
Speaker 1: me a couple of times, if it meant not having
Speaker 1: to eat ranch dressing, sure, all right, Henry writes, and
Speaker 1: Henry says, has soccer officially passed hockey as the fourth
Speaker 1: mainstream sport in the US? Absolutely not, Henry. Stop Stop
Speaker 1: these people with with the soccer For the last fifty
Speaker 1: years in America and probably before that, they have been
Speaker 1: getting on the bully pulpit there, and uh, what's the
Speaker 1: word I'm looking for preaching? I don't know if that's
Speaker 1: who are prosthetizing. Is that the word prosthetizing? I think
Speaker 1: that's the word. They have been saying that soccer is
Speaker 1: gonna pass everything by, and it's it's bullshit. It's you know,
Speaker 1: soccer is Obviously the MLS does pretty well, but it's
Speaker 1: still a niche sport in the United States. It is
Speaker 1: uh and you know it soccer is it? It's hey
Speaker 1: when people wrap themselves in the flag every four years
Speaker 1: for the World Cup only only for the women, well yeah,
Speaker 1: the men don't even qualify. But it's horrific. But I
Speaker 1: mean that euro Cup is fun. But when you watch
Speaker 1: soccer in the United States and then you take the
Speaker 1: time to watch the English Premier League, but it's like
Speaker 1: sitting in a in a toy camera and then getting
Speaker 1: into a ferrari. These are just different, different animals. And
Speaker 1: I think a better analogy, just to touch up your
Speaker 1: work would be like comparing an A a F game
Speaker 1: to an NFL game. Yeah, are watching the NBA versus
Speaker 1: the w n B A. Well you you like the
Speaker 1: w n B A. No, I don't. But that's that's
Speaker 1: the idea here, is that the level of Buran's at
Speaker 1: the European level is just drastically different than what we
Speaker 1: hear have in the United States. And on top of that,
Speaker 1: even if it was surpassing the NHL in the United States,
Speaker 1: it's not gonna overcome Canada. So in North America. I mean,
Speaker 1: I get it, but you have to go past the NHL,
Speaker 1: Major League Baseball the that's not gonna happen. It could
Speaker 1: be on the level of the Angel, but it's still niche. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I I got in the niche category. We got a
Speaker 1: couple of study this stories. This is where we decide
Speaker 1: whether it's real or bullshit. There is a new study
Speaker 1: out that found that drivers of flashy vehicles are much
Speaker 1: less likely to stop and allow pedestrians to cross the road.
Speaker 1: And they claim that depending on how expensive your car is.
Speaker 1: They broke this down. They said, the likelihood that you
Speaker 1: will not stop for people crossing the road, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: not slow down, it decreases by three percent for every
Speaker 1: thousand dollars your vehicle is worth. I'm gonna believe that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I believe it too. Yeah, I also believe when you
Speaker 1: have an expensive car, you've decided that you don't need
Speaker 1: to use the blinkers when you cut people off on
Speaker 1: the highway, Like, I don't mind if you cut me off,
Speaker 1: but at least have the courtesy to flash your blinker
Speaker 1: to make it seem like you're trying to be a
Speaker 1: kind driver. You know what, I mean, especially near where
Speaker 1: we work, Sherman Oaks Studio City, UM Hollywood, North Hollywood
Speaker 1: and West l A. There's a lot of that going on,
Speaker 1: and you can easily identify the view. It's it's all
Speaker 1: the Hollywood fox in their tesla's and their beamers and
Speaker 1: their escalades that are trying to get back out to
Speaker 1: to Calabasas, where a lot of them live out in
Speaker 1: those composts near the Kardashians, and they're driving around there
Speaker 1: and it's like the auto bond freaking joke. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: what do you expect? All right? Here we go? What
Speaker 1: would you say? Gascoon makes the perfect wedding? A new
Speaker 1: survey of two thousand Americans who plan on getting married
Speaker 1: said that this would all the only thing you really
Speaker 1: need is this to make for a perfect wedding? What
Speaker 1: I think it is? I'd say weather? Seeing weather? You
Speaker 1: think what about flowers, the dress, the venue, any of that.
Speaker 1: But you're gonna go with about the dress? Well you
Speaker 1: kind of do you know? Uh No, According to this
Speaker 1: new survey, this is great. It's an open bar awesome.
Speaker 1: You agree with that? I disagree. I agree with that
Speaker 1: one percent. There's nothing more annoying than having to, especially
Speaker 1: if you're a groomsman or bridesmaid. Not only do you
Speaker 1: have to buy a gift, but then you either have
Speaker 1: to buy a tux seed or a dress, and then
Speaker 1: the makeup and the hair and the pictures. You're spending
Speaker 1: more money to be a guest a special v I
Speaker 1: P guest at this wedding than you are actually of
Speaker 1: any other part. So you need to have at least
Speaker 1: a little something coming your way. Having an open bar
Speaker 1: is not asking a lot, especially if you don't have
Speaker 1: if you have fifty to seventy five people, that's that's
Speaker 1: not a bad thing. That's asking too much. Now, I
Speaker 1: haven't been to too many weddings. I've been to more
Speaker 1: funerals and I have weddings, which says a lot about me.
Speaker 1: But my since I got with my wife, we've gotten
Speaker 1: the more weddings because you know, she's you know, women
Speaker 1: go to more weddings or whatever. And my favorite party
Speaker 1: going to weddings is when they have an open bar,
Speaker 1: but it's only open for like an hour and a
Speaker 1: half or two hours. The mad rush before the bar
Speaker 1: is about to start charging, where people are desperately trying
Speaker 1: to get their little cups of whiskey and scotch and bourbon,
Speaker 1: and it's just hilarious. I love it. Now. You know
Speaker 1: from your experience at weddings. When you go to weddings,
Speaker 1: typically in the middle of of the table, whatever group
Speaker 1: you're with, there's usually a two bottles of wine, like
Speaker 1: a red and a white. Uh. When I went to
Speaker 1: Europe a couple of years ago from my buddy who
Speaker 1: got married to a Polish woman, the wedding was in Poland,
Speaker 1: Ben And the best part about this for the for
Speaker 1: the actual ceremony, I mean the reception itself is it
Speaker 1: was a seven course meal and they didn't have any
Speaker 1: wine at these tables. Ben. They had multiple bottles of
Speaker 1: chilled vodka. That was the style of the Polish it was.
Speaker 1: It was I think it was finished vodka. It was delicious,
Speaker 1: but that's all we had. We didn't have anything else.
Speaker 1: There was an open bar that was available with a
Speaker 1: little bit of beer, but everyone just pouring down the vodka.
Speaker 1: It was and you had it on tap. It was
Speaker 1: like water and it was absolutely fantastic. That was one
Speaker 1: of the best weddings. Such fond memories to wedding night
Speaker 1: you are such as can't I just share these stories
Speaker 1: with you and the global. Matt is of of I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio and iTunes. You love that Tornado juice is
Speaker 1: what you love. Fox Sports Radio has the best sports
Speaker 1: talk lineup in the nation. Catch all of our shows
Speaker 1: at Fox sports Radio dot com and within the I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio app. Search f s R to listen live.
Speaker 1: Here's a new study out says your brain recognizes familiar
Speaker 1: music in blank. How long does it take your brain
Speaker 1: to recognize you know that you name that, name that tune.
Speaker 1: I'll name that tune in two seconds, believe it or not.
Speaker 1: According to this study, it is less than half a second.
Speaker 1: University of University College London finds that the brain is
Speaker 1: cable of recognizing familiar music in an incredibly short amount
Speaker 1: of time, within one tenth of a second it's being played.
Speaker 1: I gotta I got a good a good skill, and
Speaker 1: I think a couple of your listeners that that always
Speaker 1: recommend soundtracks and things that listen to while they work.
Speaker 1: I will say I have a great skill of identifying
Speaker 1: the movie when I hear the music right away. It
Speaker 1: doesn't matter what it is, as long as I've watched
Speaker 1: it once, I can always identify that movie with what
Speaker 1: they sound my I'm not really great with music because
Speaker 1: I like music, but I'm not a music hard oh guy.
Speaker 1: But what I am good at is I can really
Speaker 1: recognize callers voices right away, like after a couple of words.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they try to prank call me, and I'm pretty
Speaker 1: good at detecting. My My radar is able to detect
Speaker 1: all right. Here's a new survey that finds blank percent
Speaker 1: of Americans think that air travel is more stressful than
Speaker 1: going to work. Um, I'm gonna say and according to study,
Speaker 1: fifty five percent of Americans think that air travel is
Speaker 1: more stressful than going to work. You agree with that,
Speaker 1: guess Gar, you travel a lot for work. I'm gonna say, no,
Speaker 1: I don't agree with that. People oftentimes are bad travelers
Speaker 1: as a is. I do think it's a it's a
Speaker 1: crock of ship that I think in October we'll required
Speaker 1: at least people that want to travel required to pay
Speaker 1: and and get a what's it called a real idea?
Speaker 1: Already got there? Yeah, we just go down to the
Speaker 1: d m V. It's a it's attacks, the real ideas
Speaker 1: attacks to get more money for the government. So how
Speaker 1: much did you pay for it? I don't remember we
Speaker 1: got it last year. The funny thing is like, uh,
Speaker 1: we don't have a passport. I was saying, I wishould
Speaker 1: get a passport, but we don't go anywhere. So what's
Speaker 1: the point. Well, you should go somewhere, asshole like you should.
Speaker 1: I would have until my kitchen malfunctioning. Now I can't
Speaker 1: afford to go cop out. That's just reality. It's it's
Speaker 1: being a grown up. It's called budgeting. But here's my
Speaker 1: thing on on travel. I think it depends on how
Speaker 1: much you weigh, because I know when I was morbidly
Speaker 1: obeys I dreaded traveling because you have that uncomfortable thing
Speaker 1: where you have to ask for the seat belt extender,
Speaker 1: which is very uncomfortable. You feel very awkward about that,
Speaker 1: and then you realize that the seats aren't as mine
Speaker 1: for you. You're not gonna fit in one seat, so
Speaker 1: some of your blubber is gonna be on the person
Speaker 1: next to you, which is which is also annoying. And
Speaker 1: then the final thing is that there's the great unknown,
Speaker 1: like unless you're traveling with somebody, like I used to
Speaker 1: travel when I was doing stuff in baseball and stuff,
Speaker 1: I traveled by myself and so he never knew who
Speaker 1: was gonna sit next to you. Are they gonna be nice?
Speaker 1: Are they gonna smell? Are they gonna be rude? Are
Speaker 1: they gonna be a drunk? Are they gonna be, you know,
Speaker 1: just an asshole? You have no idea. So it's like
Speaker 1: And then I always would get on the plane a lot,
Speaker 1: not always, but most of the time I get on
Speaker 1: the plane and the last person on the plane, my
Speaker 1: seat would be open, you know, then that the seat
Speaker 1: next to me, and I'm thinking, man, I'm gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have an open seat next to me. And then
Speaker 1: the last person on the plane before they closed the
Speaker 1: door comes right into my seat. Have you ever been
Speaker 1: blue balled into first class? I? Well, I flew first
Speaker 1: class a couple of times. And uh, one time, though
Speaker 1: they sold the same and there were two tickets for
Speaker 1: the same seat that were issued, and we fought and
Speaker 1: I lost. They threatened to arrest me at the airport
Speaker 1: in Memphis, Tennessee. Yeah, I was on a connecting flight
Speaker 1: from Cleveland to Miami in the World Series back in
Speaker 1: the nineties. And uh, because no direct flights from Cleveland anywhere,
Speaker 1: and so we stopped in Memphis and this is before
Speaker 1: nine eleven and all that, and so you know, I
Speaker 1: was like my first class ticket, I'm sitting first class
Speaker 1: and this guy's no, I I paid more for the
Speaker 1: ticket or whatever whatever he said. And so the flight
Speaker 1: attendants were trying to figure it out, and Uh, I said,
Speaker 1: I'm not leaving the seat. He said, he's not leaving
Speaker 1: the seat. So they decided I think they flipped a
Speaker 1: coin and they decided that the guy got the seat.
Speaker 1: I didn't get it. I still was not going to
Speaker 1: get off the plane. I was very ardent. I was
Speaker 1: gonna stay there. And then so finally one of the
Speaker 1: police officers came on and said, if you don't get
Speaker 1: off the plane, we're gonna charge you with a federal crime.
Speaker 1: And UH got off the plane. Wow, what airline was it? Uh?
Speaker 1: It was either American or Delta. I don't remember which
Speaker 1: one I had. That happened to me on not arrested,
Speaker 1: but Delta. They were ready to uh take off and
Speaker 1: close the doors. A flight attendant put me in first class.
Speaker 1: I buckled my seat. Captain's ready to give instruction about departure,
Speaker 1: and they open up the doors and a guy comes
Speaker 1: in and it was his seat and so they had
Speaker 1: pushed me back into economy. I was so fucking it
Speaker 1: was a trip. A trip to the East Coast is
Speaker 1: a five hour flight. I think the airlines as an
Speaker 1: active customer service, you know how like when you go
Speaker 1: to a baseball games. This is a hot idea hot
Speaker 1: tip for the airlines. You know, when you go to
Speaker 1: a baseball game and there's no one sitting behind the dugouts,
Speaker 1: and you can sneak down and sit behind the dugouts
Speaker 1: in the more expensive seats. I believe on a plane,
Speaker 1: when they closed the doors and there's open seats in
Speaker 1: first class, they should have like a raffle on the
Speaker 1: back and somebody from the economy class gets bumped up.
Speaker 1: How much fun would that be? That would be great?
Speaker 1: Wouldn't that be great? It would be wonderful customer service
Speaker 1: for the airline. And they have to prepare each flight
Speaker 1: with enough food and drinks for people in first class,
Speaker 1: So why not give back to the consumer. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: know what. One of our listeners, I think it goes
Speaker 1: by the handle of I'm a pilot. I gotta ask
Speaker 1: him this because he likes you. He's a he's a
Speaker 1: bit of a troublemaker. That guy, he's good. But the
Speaker 1: troubling thing is, though, Ben, is that I'm sure you've
Speaker 1: been on flights where there's nobody on there, and god
Speaker 1: forbid they bring you up to business or first class.
Speaker 1: That happened to me two summers ago where I hopped
Speaker 1: on an international flight and I was in economy for
Speaker 1: virgin and I was packed in like a sardine. But
Speaker 1: there was nobody on this flight. I mean nobody, and
Speaker 1: mean another guy who was your size, like six five
Speaker 1: six six. We went to economy plus, which is two
Speaker 1: rows in front. We're gonna take off, and the flight
Speaker 1: attendants come and they're like, hey, can we see your
Speaker 1: ticket on the ticket and they're like you need to
Speaker 1: go back to your rows, Like there's nobody on this
Speaker 1: fucking flight. What's it to you? Because they have to work, right,
Speaker 1: they don't want to. It's extra work if you're in
Speaker 1: the first class cabinal. I'm also offended, guest gut by
Speaker 1: that stupid little curtain that they close, which is like,
Speaker 1: to me, that's the equivalent of the four oh five freeway. Right,
Speaker 1: you're on the you're on, it's the it's the great
Speaker 1: divide there it's the point of demarcation the haves and
Speaker 1: the have nots. You're either on one side of the
Speaker 1: curtain where you're sitting there and you're you're drinking shots
Speaker 1: of booze and all that stuff, or you're on the
Speaker 1: other side where you're you're lucky if you get stale peanuts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what's kind of like me. You want to walk in
Speaker 1: here to Fox Sports Radio every so offten, so you've
Speaker 1: got a harem of engineers to follow around and clean
Speaker 1: up your mess when you walk into the Fox Sports Radio.
Speaker 1: How about this. More than one fourth of Americans now
Speaker 1: have tattoos, include nearly fifty percent of millennials have tattoos,
Speaker 1: and they love the tattoo. According to a new research,
Speaker 1: you get a lot of people now with neck tattoos
Speaker 1: and facial tattoos and full blown sleep And let me
Speaker 1: ask you this. Now, I don't I'm not in the
Speaker 1: tattoo game. But will there's will we see a generation
Speaker 1: of people that copy post malone and get the facial
Speaker 1: tattoo Mike Tyson? Right? Yeah, but what Tyson only did
Speaker 1: one side? He was supposed to do the other side,
Speaker 1: and then he chicken out? Are you are you hirible.
Speaker 1: That's the thing. If you get millennials or the generation X,
Speaker 1: y Z A BC that is getting Yeah, but they're
Speaker 1: getting these tattoos. I would imagine they probably work from home,
Speaker 1: or they're independent or their entrepreneurs. I don't know if
Speaker 1: everyone eventually has. It's kind of like, you know, naked
Speaker 1: pictures of yourself on the internet. If everyone has naked
Speaker 1: pictures of themselves on the internet, well, eventually the president
Speaker 1: will have naked pictures of himself on the Internet. You
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like one of those deals, given
Speaker 1: enough time, you would never get a tattoo. No, no,
Speaker 1: I changed my mind about things. You know, I don't
Speaker 1: want to commit to that. Plus you get to get
Speaker 1: maintenance on the tattoo and all that, which is even
Speaker 1: more amazing to me About the bullshit with jose L
Speaker 1: Tube and the whole talking about him getting a tattoo
Speaker 1: and it's on his chest or collar bone. I mean,
Speaker 1: part of me if I'm wrong on this, but correct me. Ben.
Speaker 1: If you're getting a tattoo during the ALCS or the
Speaker 1: a l DS, I think you need time for maintenance
Speaker 1: to uh put any kind of protective ceiling on it,
Speaker 1: to treat it to cover it. I don't know if
Speaker 1: you'd be doing that, spending two, three four hours in
Speaker 1: a tattoo parlor and then going to play a game.
Speaker 1: I just see that as so far fetched, especially at
Speaker 1: that time of the season of Major League baseball. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: my favorite tattoo story with baseball up until al Tube
Speaker 1: was the there was a picture for the Expos who
Speaker 1: actually knew he was a douchebag, Jeff Juden, and he
Speaker 1: missed a start because he had an infection that was
Speaker 1: caused by a tattoo gone wrong. He opened one of
Speaker 1: his He wasn't the opening they started, but one of
Speaker 1: the first starts of the year he missed because of
Speaker 1: infection from a bad tattoo. Speaking of which, um, the
Speaker 1: Astros right now are on pace to be hit nearly
Speaker 1: one and a half times per game. That's up from
Speaker 1: the major league average last year, which is point four one.
Speaker 1: Yeah good, you know. And I like how these hard
Speaker 1: old baseball but I said this this week on the show,
Speaker 1: But I like how these hard old baseball people are like,
Speaker 1: oh no, that wasn't international. Just keep hitting him with
Speaker 1: breaking pitches. He's idiots, won't They'll take him for half
Speaker 1: the year before they realize what's going on. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: it's like a slow death that way. It's yeah, death
Speaker 1: by a thousand paper cuts. I'm fine with that. Why
Speaker 1: don't you prefer roll this Chapman or someone that's throwing No, no,
Speaker 1: I I'm in it for the long game, not the
Speaker 1: short game. I don't want to see anyone die getting
Speaker 1: hit in the head or whatever, in the face with
Speaker 1: a fastball. But I'm fine with a lot of bruithing,
Speaker 1: bruising on the legs or the back. Maybe I've shot
Speaker 1: at the wrist. I'm okay with that. Yeah, I am too.
Speaker 1: I hope that it will continue for a hundred sixty
Speaker 1: two games. So all right. A new survey found that
Speaker 1: blank percent of Americans have made rude gestures while driving.
Speaker 1: I think this is high. I think this is like, well,
Speaker 1: I think your number is right. This number, I don't not,
Speaker 1: But I think this is bullshit, said thirty eight percent
Speaker 1: of Americans have made rude gestures while driving. I do
Speaker 1: it all the time, but I do. I've talked about
Speaker 1: this before. I do it in stealth mode, like I
Speaker 1: will give you the bird, but I will have my
Speaker 1: eyes focused front windshield. I will not look at the
Speaker 1: car on the side, and I will have my hand
Speaker 1: down with full bird extended, And that is my way
Speaker 1: to give you the bird without you knowing I'm giving
Speaker 1: you the bird. But see, here's the other thing too,
Speaker 1: is that I could be driving next to you and
Speaker 1: I can interpret that as you've given me the bird.
Speaker 1: But you can just be on your phone, you can
Speaker 1: be talking with your hands. While that's the great thing.
Speaker 1: You don't know about that. And they say of the
Speaker 1: people that give rude gestures, of them, don't know if
Speaker 1: that road rage is a criminal offense at that And uh,
Speaker 1: they said, road ridge can start with an obscene gesture,
Speaker 1: but it can quickly escalate, guest gun into something daring
Speaker 1: dress or deadly. Said of men and of women, say
Speaker 1: they have experienced a road rage against them, Yeah, I've had.
Speaker 1: I mean, we live in the l A area and
Speaker 1: people drive like a complete asshole. So absolutely there's one
Speaker 1: group of people I will never ever have road rade with,
Speaker 1: and and that you know too well out here, Ben
Speaker 1: is is motorcyclists. Um well, I cannot stand the fact
Speaker 1: that motorcycles are allowed to drive between lanes. This is
Speaker 1: the dumbest thing to me. Uh, and I guess in
Speaker 1: some states they are not allowed to. I think was
Speaker 1: it New Jersey? I've read somewhere then some states are
Speaker 1: not allowed to do that. But I think it's so
Speaker 1: stupid and you just asking to get smashed because most
Speaker 1: people driving are not looking out for motorcycle drivers driving
Speaker 1: in between the lanes. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 1: three day guys. Let's see. You can't read that one.
Speaker 1: You can't read that one. We're on a podcast. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I think it's bad. That's why I don't know.
Speaker 1: The hardest working cities in the United States, according to
Speaker 1: a new ranking out based on employment rate, average number
Speaker 1: of hours worked per week, and number of people working
Speaker 1: multiple jobs, is an all fifty states. Guests, go ahead,
Speaker 1: real answer to see if you can get any of
Speaker 1: the top five is are probably hardest cities, though, I'll
Speaker 1: say San Francisco, New York. Uh, you got one, you
Speaker 1: got Number two is San Francisco, New York is not
Speaker 1: in the top five. Philadelphia not in the top five,
Speaker 1: Chicago not in the top five. Um, I will go
Speaker 1: with what Okay, see not in the top five. Man,
Speaker 1: not in the top five. Alright, Number five on the list. Nashville, No, Irving, Texas, Irving, Texas,
Speaker 1: the Dallas Irving, Texas area. Cheyenne, Wyoming is number four.
Speaker 1: About that, never been there. You used to have a
Speaker 1: guy that worked at Fox Sports Radio, Steve Stillwell, who
Speaker 1: left to take a radio job in Cheyenne, Wyoming. He
Speaker 1: was a DJ and Cheyenne, Wyoming Number three on the
Speaker 1: list Virginia Beach, Virginia. All right, shout out to Virginia.
Speaker 1: Number two. You've got San Francisco and the number one
Speaker 1: hardest working city in the United States again based on
Speaker 1: employment rate, average number of hours worked per week, and
Speaker 1: number of people working multiple jobs. Billings, Montana. No, Anchorage, Alaska.
Speaker 1: That makes sense. It's cold there. You got a lot
Speaker 1: of people working in the oil industry, right, A lot
Speaker 1: of that going on. It's a it's a big to do. Now.
Speaker 1: Have you been to Alaska? I have not? No? Have
Speaker 1: you no? Never? Have you ever thought about taking a
Speaker 1: cruise up there with the missus or visiting? Uh me
Speaker 1: and my brother I think both my brothers have been
Speaker 1: to Alaska. My wife uh had We talked about it
Speaker 1: a couple of years ago, but we have obviously haven't
Speaker 1: done it. We're more Hawaii people than Alaska people. But
Speaker 1: I'd like to get up there, like to check it
Speaker 1: out to be fun. Why not to hang out in
Speaker 1: Vancouver and just make a whole like Northwest trip again,
Speaker 1: Go to Seattle, hang out with my friends in Seattle,
Speaker 1: the great J. Scoop. Yes, those Tradin Is all those guys. Well,
Speaker 1: you need to have a passport then if you want
Speaker 1: to do that stuff up in British? All right, what
Speaker 1: percentage of millennials would rather spend their money on experiences
Speaker 1: rather than material items? Close seventy two percent? Yeah this
Speaker 1: I'm I'm I like to say I'm a millennial. I'm
Speaker 1: an honorary millennial, but I disagree with that. I feel
Speaker 1: like when I spend my money on an experience, I
Speaker 1: wasted my money. Like I want something tangible to show
Speaker 1: for my month. Okay, So on that note, let me
Speaker 1: ask you this. When you first started in this industry,
Speaker 1: did you think or worry or even invest in retirement? Uh? Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I have some stock things and whatnot, but
Speaker 1: I knew I wasn't gonna get a four oh one
Speaker 1: k from radio. So but I'm you know, am I
Speaker 1: totally prepared to retire, of course not no. But I'm saying, like,
Speaker 1: did you invest in those things when you were younger
Speaker 1: or did you Were you all liquid at that time? Well? No,
Speaker 1: I I saved a lot of money, but I didn't
Speaker 1: because of my mom giving me some wisdom. I did
Speaker 1: invest in some stuff that some of it's actually worked out,
Speaker 1: but I didn't do it at the time thinking I
Speaker 1: was gonna be worried about retirements some day. I never
Speaker 1: thought I would ever retire, and I still don't think
Speaker 1: I'm gonna retire. But um, but yeah, I And you
Speaker 1: gotta do. If you're a young young guy or whatever
Speaker 1: a woman, you gotta put a little money aside you
Speaker 1: You will hate it when you're young, but you'll love
Speaker 1: it when you get a little older. Unless you're planning
Speaker 1: on not living very long, then just spend all your money.
Speaker 1: Who cares well? And I think that goes to the
Speaker 1: point of why would you like the materialistic things? But
Speaker 1: why not use that for you know, travel and and
Speaker 1: gifts and and uh and taking care of you Like
Speaker 1: I think the experience alone does more than the materialistic things,
Speaker 1: right breakdown or they're they're useful once And I don't
Speaker 1: know I don't know what kind of crap your buying,
Speaker 1: but the stuff I buy it last a long time.
Speaker 1: I don't think about cell phones, laptops, computers. It's all
Speaker 1: made to be broken. Right, You're gonna buy something new
Speaker 1: next year the year after that. A right, So you
Speaker 1: spent a few on the bucks at a concert, and
Speaker 1: then how do you benefit from that? Well, it's just fun.
Speaker 1: It's entertainment. I'll give you. If it's a bad concert,
Speaker 1: I'll give you. A perfect example is that in my
Speaker 1: twenties I loved traveling to Vegas. You know, in the
Speaker 1: early two thousand has been like Vegas is good. You've
Speaker 1: got comps for just playing whatever you had. You have
Speaker 1: to worry about ratings ran that bullshit. But never once
Speaker 1: did I traveled to the East Coast. I never went
Speaker 1: to Boston, never went to New York, never went to Chicago.
Speaker 1: And doing that now my thirties, I completely regret not
Speaker 1: doing it ten years ago, because you don't need to
Speaker 1: have regrets regrets I do. I don't look back. Who
Speaker 1: can't look forward? You don't look back. I think if
Speaker 1: it's just an old man in a rocking chair drinking lemonade. No,
Speaker 1: but of course, but you're making up for wasted time,
Speaker 1: like fucking around in Vegas this one thing, but doing
Speaker 1: it multiple times for bachelor parties or just to do
Speaker 1: it as opposed to expect most people in l A do.
Speaker 1: Young people go to Vegas and get you know, crazy,
Speaker 1: That's how it works, I know. But but cities like
Speaker 1: Chicago and Boston, New York and Philly, those are those
Speaker 1: are great cities. Those are you know, for the dining experiences,
Speaker 1: for the entertainment, for the sports, for the people like
Speaker 1: those things. I would rather have than doing a Vegas
Speaker 1: trip for for a couple of nights, just because it's
Speaker 1: forty five minutes away in a flight or five hours
Speaker 1: if you drive. Alright, so fine, I know what happened there.
Speaker 1: It was a dramatic pause, a pregnant pause or whatever.
Speaker 1: But I think you're digesting all of that. You're you're
Speaker 1: taking that wisdom along and saying actually full disclosure, truth
Speaker 1: and broadcasting. My headphones popped out, so I didn't hear
Speaker 1: any of that. I did not hear any I could
Speaker 1: pretend I did. I don't think we have too much
Speaker 1: time here, so we probably should do we have any
Speaker 1: don't stick to sports stories. You know. I would love
Speaker 1: to not stick to sports today. Um, but I punted
Speaker 1: on that situation because you did, because the ninety four
Speaker 1: minutes of what we were doing. You know what, I
Speaker 1: do have two things that are not stick to sports
Speaker 1: related for us. I have more studies. If you want,
Speaker 1: I have endless amounts of studies and you can do
Speaker 1: more of those. But here I need your help on something.
Speaker 1: All right, UM, I'm staring down the barrel of forty
Speaker 1: and I had done something last week that I had
Speaker 1: not done in eighteen or nineteen years. Um, there's a lady.
Speaker 1: What's her name? Do we know the ladies? No, it's
Speaker 1: nothing to do with that. I actually I made the
Speaker 1: jump bend to go back on the creatine. Oh really,
Speaker 1: very Mark McGuire, of you, yes, like very Andrew Steene
Speaker 1: Sosa McGuire, Griffy, Um, how did you deal with how
Speaker 1: did when you hit forty? How did you cope with it?
Speaker 1: I didn't even think about it. I didn't care about it,
Speaker 1: didn't bullshit, I didn't. You are a huge stress freak,
Speaker 1: so you worry about it. I don't. I just keep going.
Speaker 1: I don't feel like people. I hear these people. I
Speaker 1: feel terrible. I you know, I'm amazed. I felt the
Speaker 1: same when I was way over four hundred pounds as
Speaker 1: I do since I've lost the weight, I don't feel
Speaker 1: any better. So why are you losing the weight? Then?
Speaker 1: Why do you care so much about losing the weight. Well,
Speaker 1: because I think I'll get you know, I'm trying to
Speaker 1: make up I lived a horrible life. No regrets, no
Speaker 1: regrets for for I'm not talking about regrets. Dumb. He's
Speaker 1: so offended by a word, all right, So I went
Speaker 1: for it. I eat a lot of really bad food
Speaker 1: and was very OBEs So I know I've cut down
Speaker 1: on my lifespan, so I'm trying to gain back some
Speaker 1: of what I lost. So I end up where I
Speaker 1: was supposed to be before I check out. But I'm
Speaker 1: not worried about the whole vanity thing and all. You know,
Speaker 1: I mean everyone, it is important. You can't be ignorant
Speaker 1: to it. But I mean, I'm not gonna sit there
Speaker 1: and forget on that topic though. Guess con Uh, here's
Speaker 1: a question. Why does stress turn our hair gray? You've
Speaker 1: got a lot of gray hair by the way you
Speaker 1: die your hair, but you have a lot I've seen
Speaker 1: you without the hair die. You have a lot of
Speaker 1: gray hair. I'm getting some of my facial hair. It's
Speaker 1: it's really disturbing. Harvard researchers have unlocked the answers. The says,
Speaker 1: feelings of stress activate nerves associated with the flight or
Speaker 1: fight or flight response in the human condition. Have you
Speaker 1: ever taken a stress test before? I have not. I
Speaker 1: have not done that, but I was. I have a
Speaker 1: stressful job, so I don't. I mean, I'm not like
Speaker 1: saving people's lives or anything like that, but I have
Speaker 1: a kind of job where it's competitive, and you know
Speaker 1: how you work in the business, and the things don't
Speaker 1: go right, you're out of work. They'll get rid of you,
Speaker 1: they'll throw you away like a tissue. Plus, I have
Speaker 1: to do a lot of the work for the show
Speaker 1: because of the reasons we'll not get into here. So
Speaker 1: it causes me more stress that I have to do everything. Uh,
Speaker 1: and I don't have a lot of help along the way,
Speaker 1: which is problematic. So well, so back to my original question.
Speaker 1: When you hit forty and you started breaking down, what
Speaker 1: did you do? How did you cope with it? I
Speaker 1: didn't break down. I was fine. It was just to
Speaker 1: me another birthday. I didn't you know, I'm not, but
Speaker 1: you are breaking down. No gall bladder, burnt tongue, chip too.
Speaker 1: I burnt my tongue because my pizza I make is
Speaker 1: so good I couldn't wait to eat it. Not because
Speaker 1: I'm at my age. Uh, but don't you think it's
Speaker 1: important to worry about these things as No? I mean,
Speaker 1: you're all gonna get old, We're all gonna get ugly,
Speaker 1: We're all gonna die. And who cares? You know it
Speaker 1: happens to us, It happened everyone before us and everyone
Speaker 1: after us. Every man, woman and child gets old, gets ugly,
Speaker 1: their hair turns gray, they have health problems, and then
Speaker 1: they die if they're lucky or if not, they are
Speaker 1: you know, write a helicopter and things go sideways earlier.
Speaker 1: What an asshole? What a fucking asshole? You don't know
Speaker 1: who I'm referring. Yeah, I do know how you're referring to.
Speaker 1: You don't know who I'm reframinge. I have a pretty
Speaker 1: good idea. You have no idea. Who have a pretty
Speaker 1: good idea. You don't know what I'm talking. Here's the
Speaker 1: other thing about not sticking to sports. Is itinerary? Um?
Speaker 1: I'm looking at some things for spring training in Arizona,
Speaker 1: and then the draft in Vegas, and then we also
Speaker 1: might have to do a business trip to San Francisco
Speaker 1: here in the next couple of weeks. So how are
Speaker 1: we gonna do all this stuff? I don't know. The
Speaker 1: Vegas thing I think is gonna happen, but I'm not.
Speaker 1: I gotta wait a few Are you going to go
Speaker 1: to the draft thing? Are you gonna go do the
Speaker 1: draft of Shenanigans there in Vegas? Well? I might, but
Speaker 1: it might be for for another production. So I was
Speaker 1: gonna ask you about is partaking in the festivities or
Speaker 1: what that is like for you during that week, because
Speaker 1: obviously the demands of your show are different because it's
Speaker 1: an eleven to three o'clock the West Coast time. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about going. I might. I don't know. It's
Speaker 1: gonna be such a cluster fuck on the strip in Vegas.
Speaker 1: It's bad when there's nothing going on. This sounds like
Speaker 1: it's gonna be armageddon for traffic, So that scares me
Speaker 1: a little bit. But I'm probably gonna go, but I'll
Speaker 1: stay in the outskirts. I'm not gonna stay in the
Speaker 1: belly of the Beast. Um, you get one of those
Speaker 1: rooms at the Rio, like they're all sweets, like the
Speaker 1: Penguin sweets the Rio. Yeah, I mean I know some
Speaker 1: people that are fans of the show that work at
Speaker 1: the casino. So I might see what I can come
Speaker 1: up with in regards to a hotel or whatever. We'll
Speaker 1: we'll see about that. And we were invited by listeners
Speaker 1: to go to Minnesota Philadelphia as well. Fats and Philly
Speaker 1: wants us to come back there and he'll he says
Speaker 1: he's gonna roll out the Red Carpet Force in Philly,
Speaker 1: so it's gonna do a little world tour. Philadelphia is awesome.
Speaker 1: Now how about this though, since baseball is right around
Speaker 1: the corner, Um, do I have your permission to to
Speaker 1: invite Rob Parker on so we can chat baseball specific Oh,
Speaker 1: the great Rob Parker. Absolutely? Yeah, yeah, I mean he's
Speaker 1: been Rob Parker fan. Yeah, he's he's going on a
Speaker 1: on a cruise, he's taking some trips. He finished Antarctica
Speaker 1: a couple of months ago. So it's that time of
Speaker 1: the year of spring training. And then obviously first pitch
Speaker 1: of Game one of one sixty two, so we could
Speaker 1: do like a hard old baseball podcast. Yeah. I mean
Speaker 1: the best thing is he's got range right and being
Speaker 1: a New Yorker and in Detroit, he's got all that stuff.
Speaker 1: On the East coast, in the Middlewest, he's a Yankee guy.
Speaker 1: I'm a dodgery guy something like that. Yeah, that out there, alright,
Speaker 1: very nice. Put the baby to bed if you want
Speaker 1: you all you have more. Well, you don't have any
Speaker 1: positive emails about about me, like no female interaction like
Speaker 1: from Tammy or from and the other females that hit
Speaker 1: you up and sing my praise and uh no, I
Speaker 1: got a whole stack of angry messages from Mark the
Speaker 1: full name guy who fills in my inbox the horrific,
Speaker 1: horrific messages. Are you getting more people that were bent
Speaker 1: out of shape about my parking last week or the
Speaker 1: fact that I took a shot at Marcel a couple
Speaker 1: of days ago. Oh no, they still are upset about
Speaker 1: your parking. Here's one of the emails. I get three
Speaker 1: or four of these emails a day from this Mark
Speaker 1: the full name guy. He says, I would bet most
Speaker 1: listeners wish Marcel would just fade away. He is a boring,
Speaker 1: pompous ass. In love with attention. He does not deserve.
Speaker 1: Mark the full name guy said in this email. He
Speaker 1: is just soft in the head and the only reason
Speaker 1: he is taking up airtime is that he is a
Speaker 1: boot liquor and suck up and obviously a budding flip.
Speaker 1: I don't know what that means. He has no real
Speaker 1: talent or imagination. And what an insult to the intelligence. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're the one thing that Mark left out in that
Speaker 1: which is a great rat was the fact that you
Speaker 1: use Marcel as a crutch and a soundboard so you
Speaker 1: can check out for five minutes. Uh, let's see what
Speaker 1: what else that you know? I'm right, I'm not listening
Speaker 1: to you. I'm trying to find I got so literally
Speaker 1: so many of these emails from Mark. I'm trying to
Speaker 1: get the one with the most venom because he really
Speaker 1: really gets upset. He encompasses a lot of the militia,
Speaker 1: A lot of these I haven't even opened. Uh. He
Speaker 1: hates Tammy and Montani rips Tammy all the time too.
Speaker 1: He sends me nasty, nasty. They're blood rivals, their blood rivals.
Speaker 1: Uh see here, curse curse of Ben Mallard, Mark says,
Speaker 1: And what do I pull what what do I point
Speaker 1: to concerning the Astros and bo Sox cheating scandal, The
Speaker 1: curse of Ben Mallory, He says, of course, who else
Speaker 1: forged an unholy alliance with a Boston based radio sports
Speaker 1: talk station and who defended Bill Belichick and the spygate
Speaker 1: standal came to public awareness and contrived alibis and downplayed
Speaker 1: the entire incident. Call it karma if you like, I
Speaker 1: know what is real, the curse of Ben Maller. Ha
Speaker 1: ha ha ha, that's exactly it. I wonder if he'll
Speaker 1: go away at the Dodgers win a World Series this year?
Speaker 1: Uh no, he'll say it's He'll come up with some excuse.
Speaker 1: Here's another one from Mark. Your joy is not real.
Speaker 1: It is obvious that you are miserable enough to pretend
Speaker 1: you are enjoying Booze and bean Balls was talking about
Speaker 1: the Astros. It is not going to bring the Dodgers
Speaker 1: at Worlds of his championship and all that what ifs
Speaker 1: don't mean a thing either, because you try to minimize
Speaker 1: the other American League teams and the Dodgers postseason track
Speaker 1: records sucks and has sucked their entire history and then
Speaker 1: he's like, go out and have some pasta with that
Speaker 1: Italian guy. Was he is he referring to uh, what's
Speaker 1: from Kansas City? No, he's referring to Little Sword. Actually
Speaker 1: he wants me to go have pasta with the story.
Speaker 1: Have you got any kind of victriol from a a
Speaker 1: news reporter or a writer or like radio or TV
Speaker 1: talent like that before? Oh you're talking about somebody have
Speaker 1: said on the radio? Yeah, well you know, how was
Speaker 1: that the Arizona Republic? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A
Speaker 1: lot of small hit towns will will write, you know,
Speaker 1: they'll they'll have columns. I've been featuring Arizona. I remember
Speaker 1: the first time that happened was it was not in
Speaker 1: Des Moines. It was a town in Iowa, UM, and
Speaker 1: they I ripped Iowa State. Iowa stated beating Oklahoma and
Speaker 1: it was like a big upset in college football and
Speaker 1: ruined Oklahoma season and Iowa State sucked at the time,
Speaker 1: and I said, what a buzz kill it was how
Speaker 1: they ruined the rest of the college football season. And
Speaker 1: they wrote a column and it was I forget what
Speaker 1: they They gave me. The whole the whole column was
Speaker 1: dedicated to me. And they gave me a nickname and
Speaker 1: I forget what it was, but it's it was pretty funny.
Speaker 1: It was pretty funny. They just like the whole thing
Speaker 1: was just attacking. I gotta kick out of it. Well, Houston,
Speaker 1: I think Houston takes the cake, right Houston with Deshaun
Speaker 1: Watson and obviously you'll get the Astros this year. And
Speaker 1: then Arizona raced into the defense of Kyler Murray was
Speaker 1: pretty good too. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, you know they're
Speaker 1: fan boys, are lemmings and that you expect. It's really good.
Speaker 1: It's an acid test to find out what, you know,
Speaker 1: how pathetic your sports town is depending on how you respond.
Speaker 1: But are you Are you a fan of media conflict
Speaker 1: like you You've seen some stuff over the last week
Speaker 1: on social media with media personalities combating and feuding, and yeah,
Speaker 1: I listen, I don't you know, I don't really have
Speaker 1: a problem with I think it's funny or whatever to
Speaker 1: a point, and you know, it's like, hey, you know,
Speaker 1: that's fine. And I haven't gotten into too many rhubarbs
Speaker 1: with like back and force with the media people. I
Speaker 1: did get into it with John Hayman Um, but he's
Speaker 1: you know, he I used to know him and he
Speaker 1: was all right. He's turned into a hard, old douche bag.
Speaker 1: I don't know what happened to him. We need to
Speaker 1: get you in a room with Cowherd. You and Colin
Speaker 1: would be an interesting combination, especially during football season, because yeah,
Speaker 1: I listen every willing to maybe forego sleep and come
Speaker 1: on his show sometime or something like that. I can
Speaker 1: broke with that for you. Sure, yeah, I'm sure you do.
Speaker 1: You could do football season. We'll do Benny versus A
Speaker 1: Penny versus Blazing five. Okay, let's do it. Bom Megan happened.
Speaker 1: I'm sure he'll sign off on that. What could possibly
Speaker 1: go wrong? A com rex or two. Don't worry. We
Speaker 1: got seven engineers that will come in and in an
Speaker 1: hour and a half unpatched something and then it will work. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: Now Here's the thing though, is I can only hope
Speaker 1: now that we put a bow on this thing, is
Speaker 1: that you'll actually tweeted out and try to market it
Speaker 1: as opposed to rubbing my nose and your ship about
Speaker 1: spreading it to the masses and trying to elevate you
Speaker 1: as a talent. I don't know you're speaking in Rubbishes
Speaker 1: two weeks. I have tweeted things out and you have
Speaker 1: been in defiance of retweeting it or publishing it or
Speaker 1: bring it out. You know, I don't care. It's it's free.
Speaker 1: I don't don't care. I don't know. Whatever, it's do
Speaker 1: whatever you want. That's what you've told here. I just
Speaker 1: I was sorry. I was distracted. I was looking up
Speaker 1: the newspaper column that the first one that I remember
Speaker 1: really ripping me. And this is in Sioux City, Iowa.
Speaker 1: And here it is. This is the lead on the column.
Speaker 1: What's the title? Um, I don't I don't have that.
Speaker 1: I just have the the actual story anyway, he says.
Speaker 1: Quite early on most Saturday mornings, sux Cidians, should they choose,
Speaker 1: are subjected to six straight hours from midnight to six
Speaker 1: am of a sports radio talk show host named Ben Maller.
Speaker 1: Since the sixth hours, a repeat of the first listeners
Speaker 1: got to get their date dander up twice on the
Speaker 1: same touchy subject, at least among Iowa State football fans
Speaker 1: and graduates of the university in general. When Mallard referred
Speaker 1: to Iowa State as a joke of a football program
Speaker 1: over the years, the condescending and patronizing chatterbox, then called
Speaker 1: Iowa States running back who scored the winning touchdown in
Speaker 1: an upset of the number two previously unranked but previously
Speaker 1: unranked Oklahoma State in ames Iowa the great Jeff Woody
Speaker 1: in quotes, and uh, he goes on and rips me
Speaker 1: some more. But that that line, I used that for
Speaker 1: a long time, the condescending and patronizing chatterbox. That's poetry,
Speaker 1: is what that is. And it is and that's I mean.
Speaker 1: He did take a shot at you, telling you that
Speaker 1: you actually tape record an hour on your show, which
Speaker 1: is lazy radio. So he did. Actually, you know, I
Speaker 1: know you weren't around then. You were probably you were
Speaker 1: just a wink in your parents eyes there. But back
Speaker 1: in those days, we did five live hours of radio,
Speaker 1: and they said they needed to get six hours of programing.
Speaker 1: So I said, just we're replay an hour. Was that?
Speaker 1: So you were solo or you were you with somebody else?
Speaker 1: I was solo. It five hours a night solo. Holy shit,
Speaker 1: a fucking nightmare. That was good time. Did you ever
Speaker 1: bring on the Prince of Darkness? Uh? Yeah, well we
Speaker 1: I worked with him several times. He worked at Fox briefly,
Speaker 1: you know. But but this is nothing to say that
Speaker 1: that actually trained me, guest gun, I'm not gonna pat
Speaker 1: myself on the back too late unless I am. But
Speaker 1: when I was doing the w e I stuff, I
Speaker 1: would do three or four hours on EI. I have
Speaker 1: an hour break and then I do four hours on Fox.
Speaker 1: I was doing eight hours of radio some days eight
Speaker 1: hours of radio. And you would purposely have your same
Speaker 1: listeners calling to that show, so you can use them
Speaker 1: as a crutch to navigate through those hours of content
Speaker 1: on Boston radio, right, a crutch. So having fans that
Speaker 1: follow you wherever you go as a crutch, that's a
Speaker 1: good approach if you're if you're a program director. Gascon
Speaker 1: thinks having fans follow you from radio station radio station
Speaker 1: is a crutch. That's a bad thing. It's a calling show, dummy.
Speaker 1: I give out the number of people call in. You
Speaker 1: want me to go to human resources again? Yeah, you
Speaker 1: can do that. You think it as a crutch. I
Speaker 1: wish your father could give you a ticket. Man, he
Speaker 1: knows people. He can get your ticket next time you
Speaker 1: park like that. I'm not gonna even tweet it. I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna send a photo of your dad is what
Speaker 1: I'm to do. How about that? Not send a photo
Speaker 1: to your old man? That's great, that is all right.
Speaker 1: I gotta I gotta, I got things I do. What
Speaker 1: are you gonna drag this out? We we already made
Speaker 1: me wait an hour to be because I was doing
Speaker 1: absolutely nothing for an hour and a half. Well, listen,
Speaker 1: you should have made sure it worked. It's a bad
Speaker 1: job by you. Shame on you. And uh, I was here,
Speaker 1: I was prepared, and the engineers all admitted the problem
Speaker 1: was on your end, not my Well, it was on
Speaker 1: their around. They owned the equipment, so it's not on
Speaker 1: I did hear, though, I don't know if I'm supposed
Speaker 1: to say this that because of what happened, they're gonna
Speaker 1: upgrade the equipment in that podcast studio. How about that
Speaker 1: you're bitching and money finally paid off. All it takes
Speaker 1: is to have four engineers and a pow wow for
Speaker 1: an hour. And uh, of course it's always the last
Speaker 1: place you look, yes, because you stop looking right. It's
Speaker 1: like when you lose your keys. He's oh, everyone, so
Speaker 1: I found it the last place I looked there? It
Speaker 1: was well, of course you wouldn't keep looking for something
Speaker 1: after you founded. Yeah, well that's good. That means you
Speaker 1: don't have to blame anybody else here for fucking with
Speaker 1: the gears, So props to you on that. All right,
Speaker 1: you can I go now, I'm like, alright, alright, thank
Speaker 1: you all appreciate that. Download this podcast asked tell a friend.
Speaker 1: You've already downloaded this one, but tell a friend and
Speaker 1: the other podcast have a wonderful, amazing, crazy, great weekend
Speaker 1: and I'll get you back on the radio Sunday night
Speaker 1: into Monday two am in the East on Fox, and
Speaker 1: all the I Heart affiliates and non I Heart affiliates
Speaker 1: have a great weekend. Thanks