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Speaker 1: That's okay, because no one here is.

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Speaker 2: Every week I ask our listeners to send in their

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Speaker 2: own embarrassing stories, something that will hopefully make us feel

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Speaker 2: better about our own misery.

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Speaker 3: And this week we are hearing from Melissa.

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Speaker 4: Melissa, Hi, Danielle, and guest.

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Speaker 5: My name is Melissa. And in ninth grade biology class,

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Speaker 5: I was reading out loud and said orgasm instead of organism.

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Speaker 5: My teacher corrected me by simply saying organism, and I

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Speaker 5: just thought, okay, yeah. Because I hadn't noticed what I did,

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Speaker 5: I kept reading and said it again without realizing it.

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Speaker 5: I was able to laugh about it, but for weeks

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Speaker 5: people came up to me and said, living orgasm, Oh.

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Speaker 4: My gosh, that is do you have?

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Speaker 2: I mean, you were homeschooled, so you don't have the

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Speaker 2: same experience of raising your hand in class and saying

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Speaker 2: mom like I do. I don't know how on earth

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Speaker 2: that happens, but I think every kid had that happen

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Speaker 2: at least once, where you go to say your teacher's name,

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Speaker 2: but for some reason mom comes out and you're in

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Speaker 2: the middle of your class and you're like mom, and

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Speaker 2: then you're like, not mom, I mean missus Duckworth like.

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Speaker 3: I had that happen so many times.

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Speaker 2: But do you have any I mean, we can kind

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Speaker 2: of think of American idol as being a very short

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Speaker 2: term high school experience for you.

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Speaker 4: I did go to high school. I was like on

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Speaker 4: and off, and my first full years of school were

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Speaker 4: ninth and tenth grade, So I went for two four

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Speaker 4: years in high school.

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Speaker 2: Okay, do you have any horribly embarrassing high school stories?

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Speaker 4: I'm trying to think, Gosh, I feel like I was

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Speaker 4: really good at avoiding, but I will say this. Okay,

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Speaker 4: one time one of my friends plotted this thing. Her

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Speaker 4: nickname at the time was Fish. We'd call her fish,

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Speaker 4: but she have the nickname fish because one of her friends,

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Speaker 4: one of our other friends, I gave her a handshake

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Speaker 4: and it was like that feels like a fish, and

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Speaker 4: so you started calling her fish and she doesn't like

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Speaker 4: the nickname anymore. But at the time, but we were

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Speaker 4: at like another friend's house party, like a party, and

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Speaker 4: she's like, I'm going to go and steal my ex

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Speaker 4: boyfriend's car. She's like, do you want to come? I

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Speaker 4: was like okay, and she's like, yeah, come with us, David,

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Speaker 4: And so we go. She had plotted with one of

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Speaker 4: her other friends. They were going to a pool to

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Speaker 4: like have a pool day like with one of her

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Speaker 4: She was hanging out with this ex and she had

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Speaker 4: like acquired like the spare key to her her ex's car.

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Speaker 5: She had acquired it, acquired she had acquired it.

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Speaker 2: I'm not gonna say how, but she had come into

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Speaker 2: contact with the spare keys.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, yeah, And so they plotted. So she they

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Speaker 4: got we got these like neil, what do they call

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Speaker 4: this nil nylon socks? Oh my gosh, yeah, yeah, panty hose.

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Speaker 4: Put it over our heads so that we would look

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Speaker 4: like robbers. Okay, come on, this is the naughtest thing

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Speaker 4: I've ever done well in high school. So I was

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Speaker 4: an accomplice where I just simply they planted out so

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Speaker 4: that they would be walking back to the apartment from

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Speaker 4: the pool as we drove by in his car and

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Speaker 4: so and we rolled down the windows with the nylon

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Speaker 4: like yeah, like the I think it was panty hose

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Speaker 4: over our heads. And so they were walking and we

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Speaker 4: sneak in, We get his car and as they're walking back,

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Speaker 4: we drive by in his car with the windows rolled

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Speaker 4: down with the pandy hose over our heads. Did he scream? No,

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Speaker 4: he was just kind of like I don't think it

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Speaker 4: took him a minute to like figure out what was

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Speaker 4: going on. It's like, is that my car?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a lots of process. You're like, do those

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Speaker 3: people have panty hose on their heads?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: And are they in my car?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? Are they driving my car? And I think, like,

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Speaker 4: I think we just drove by and then like parked

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Speaker 4: it like in another parking spot like nearby there, so

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Speaker 4: we didn't take his car away from him, but then

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Speaker 4: we just like ran off and like you.

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Speaker 3: Acquired a car for a joy ride? Is all that happened?

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Speaker 3: And that story, as far as I'm concerned.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it was. But it was pretty wild and I

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Speaker 4: was very embarrassed by that, So I don't know, it

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Speaker 4: was like exciting, but I felt so embarrassed that I

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Speaker 4: was doing something that I shouldn't have been doing. Yes,

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Speaker 4: I was like, I can't believe I did that. And yeah, for.

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Speaker 2: Someone who always felt like he was being watched, that

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Speaker 2: was a well that was bold.

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Speaker 3: Did you know quite what you were getting into? And

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Speaker 3: she was like, oh, my friend, yeah.

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Speaker 4: I don't think I wrote yeah, But at the same time,

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Speaker 4: like fish was like my outlet of try new things

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Speaker 4: in the world. So thanks Fish. She would call me

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Speaker 4: lettuce boy because I loved subway, and subway was a

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Speaker 4: lot cheaper. Back then, it was they had five dollars

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Speaker 4: foot longs, and.

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Speaker 3: Do they not have that anymore?

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Speaker 4: No, I feel like it's like fifteen dollars.

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Speaker 3: Fifteen dollars foot longs.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, maybe even more. I don't know. It's wow, gosh, yeah,

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Speaker 4: it's everything is so expensive now, but we're old. Look

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Speaker 4: at us everything us back in my day we got

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Speaker 4: five dollars more.

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Speaker 3: Now they're fifteen dollars.

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Speaker 4: Back minded they have the dollar Menu, Wendy's and stuff.

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Speaker 4: But so I literally because one of my my when

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Speaker 4: I was in fourth grade, I had like a fourth

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Speaker 4: grade teacher for a little bit because I would like

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Speaker 4: my parents were like, have me in school for like

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Speaker 4: a couple months and then take me out and homeschool

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Speaker 4: me for I don't I'm not sure what the dynamic.

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Speaker 4: But missus Coughlin she would say, like, yeah, back in

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Speaker 4: my day, we had penny. It was a penny for

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Speaker 4: a piece of candy for a penny, yep. So now

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Speaker 4: here we are dollar manu five dollars foot long. But yeah,

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Speaker 4: she would call me lettuce boy because they were all

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Speaker 4: slamming subways lettuce, like, oh, this lettuce is so disgusting.

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Speaker 4: And I never said anything like I was known as

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Speaker 4: the quiet boy who just sat in the background. I

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Speaker 4: just enjoyed everyone's company and I just said, but I

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Speaker 4: love lettuce, and they all burst out laughing because first off, like, wait,

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Speaker 4: first off, David, you said something right, what you said lettuce? Yeah,

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Speaker 4: And so they all started call me lettuce boy after that.

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Speaker 3: What's your favorite kind of lettuce? I'm a big butter

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Speaker 3: lettuce person.

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Speaker 4: Oh you know, you know, yeah, you know, I didn't

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Speaker 4: know let I'm not.

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Speaker 2: Sure it is now that I say that out loud.

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Speaker 2: Is that like an herb? It's a week?

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Speaker 4: Is it a week? Oh? I love it? I buy it.

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Speaker 4: I love me somemm like that. Yeah, the spice in it.

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Speaker 4: But I mean back then, I loved just Iceberg lettuce, right,

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Speaker 4: I just loved the crunch. For me, it was crunchy

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Speaker 4: water and I loved water. I still love water.

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Speaker 2: I love Iceberg lettuce, especially with ranch dressing on it.

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Speaker 2: Like if you're going to go to like a you know,

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Speaker 2: have you been to a soup plantation or a sweeze tomato.

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Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, yeah, I love.

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Speaker 2: A giant plate of iceberg, lettuce, some croutons, little garbonzobeans,

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Speaker 2: some cheese, and ranchtras.

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Speaker 3: It's the least it's the it's the least healthy thing.

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Speaker 4: I can't do crotons, but I feel and I stopped

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Speaker 4: doing a ranch when I found out that it wasn't

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Speaker 4: healthy for you. I was like, I'm trying to because

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Speaker 4: there was a period of time where I had like

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Speaker 4: a manager when I was a kid, and they're like,

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Speaker 4: he needs to lose weight. Because so I stopped. I

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Speaker 4: cut out ranch, and I cut out soda because those

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Speaker 4: are some of the things he told me to cut out.

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Speaker 2: So yep, I also went through that. Oh did you well, Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I remember. I think a pop tart was the first time.

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Speaker 2: I was like twelve years old and sorry, mom, not

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Speaker 2: trying to not trying to trash your name.

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Speaker 3: But we were leaving set.

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Speaker 2: So I had been on you know, I'd been in

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Speaker 2: school all day and then we'd been rehearsing all day

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Speaker 2: and we had done our run through, we had gone

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Speaker 2: through our long note session. It was probably like five

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Speaker 2: pm and we were leaving set for the day, and

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Speaker 2: just on the walk out, passing craft services, I just

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Speaker 2: grabbed a thing of pop tarts and my mom not

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Speaker 2: incorrectly looked at me and said, Danielle, you don't need

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Speaker 2: two pop tarts. Do you have any idea how many

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Speaker 2: calories are in two pop tarts? We're going home to

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Speaker 2: eat dinner. Two pop tarts is not like a thing

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Speaker 2: you grab and just eat at five pm before dinner.

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Speaker 2: I don't think at all before then I had ever

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Speaker 2: correlated what's in this thing I'm about to eat and

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Speaker 2: what am I putting in? And it goes into my

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Speaker 2: body and then something's gonna happen to my body with it,

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Speaker 2: whether that's fullness or weight.

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Speaker 3: Gain, and then I'm going to go eat again.

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Speaker 2: It was like the very It was like all of

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Speaker 2: a sudden, it was like, right, calories, Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: And I really distinctly remember thinking after that, being aware

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Speaker 2: of the transactional nature of the food we eat, the

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Speaker 2: things we consume, and like that it it means something,

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Speaker 2: and so for me, like pop tarts was that was

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Speaker 2: that thing that really like, every time I think of

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Speaker 2: a pop tart, I'm still to this day, actually canny.

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Speaker 2: I'll eat a donut, no problem. I'll actually multiple donuts.

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Speaker 2: But when I think of pop tarts, I think I

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Speaker 2: can't eat.

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Speaker 3: A pop tart.

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Speaker 4: Wow. It affected you that, yeah, deeply? Wow?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: And I guess also, like you said you were I

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Speaker 4: was twelve twelve, Well, I feel like twelve is when

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Speaker 4: you start becoming more conscious of like what other people

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Speaker 4: think of you, like your brain, your mind is transitioning

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Speaker 4: into not really carrying what other people think of you too,

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Speaker 4: Like oh my gosh, like you're suddenly aware of, yeah,

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Speaker 4: someone might think this of me, or someone might notice

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Speaker 4: this about me. And but also, like when you grow

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Speaker 4: up on tea, like in front of a camera, you're

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Speaker 4: also like very you're everyone nitpicks everything about what they

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Speaker 4: see about you. Yes, and they say it out loud.

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Speaker 4: They notice I noticed this about and it's like you

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Speaker 4: don't even know these people, and it's so it's it's

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Speaker 4: kind of wild. And I feel like people were didn't.

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Speaker 4: We're out of touch with that for a long time.

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Speaker 4: They're like, I can't even imagine. But now that we

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Speaker 4: have social media.

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Speaker 3: Everyone gets to experience it. Oh the joy.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, everyone understands what you had to deal with your

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Speaker 4: whole life. That's exactly right, which is and it's like

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Speaker 4: and I think people can now see how much it

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Speaker 4: messes with your mind. Yeah, like having a peanut got

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Speaker 4: gallery constantly commenting on everything you do and you're like,

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Speaker 4: what are you I'm like, it's like, that's not even

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Speaker 4: a thing. I wasn't even bringing that up. And I'm

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Speaker 4: just trying to like I'm just trying to share this,

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Speaker 4: or I'm just trying to do my job. I'm just

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Speaker 4: trying to act, or I'm just trying to you know,

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Speaker 4: bring you into like this you know thing that we're

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Speaker 4: trying to create, and you're noticing so many other things

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Speaker 4: about me that I don't. Yeah, like I don't know.

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Speaker 3: It's well now the double edged sort of both.

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Speaker 2: So at least for me in the nineties, there wasn't

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Speaker 2: social media, so I had to deal with it from

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Speaker 2: like a press or producers or those people nitpicking me.

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Speaker 2: But I didn't necessarily know what the public thought about

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Speaker 2: me because they didn't have the outlet to tell me.

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Speaker 2: So somebody would have to say what they thought about

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Speaker 2: me to my face in order for me to know. Now,

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Speaker 2: for kids growing up on TV, they perform, they do

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Speaker 2: the thing, then they go back to their phones and

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Speaker 2: they get to read the person immediately saying I thought

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Speaker 2: that performance was really crappy. I also didn't like what

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Speaker 2: they were wearing, and why did they do their so

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Speaker 2: they get it immediately immediately that it's like a bad

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Speaker 2: feedback loop.

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Speaker 4: And yeah, and there's so many bots too, thoughts. People

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Speaker 4: make bots just to troll.

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Speaker 2: Correct accounts to then argue to have conversations with each other.

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Speaker 3: I'll notice that sometimes.

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Speaker 4: The drama Why what?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: Why are we so drama fueled?

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Speaker 3: Y'all right? I know, I know.

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Speaker 2: I think all the time about how many people hate

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Speaker 2: follow someone?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm like, oh god, I.

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Speaker 3: Don't have time for the love follows.

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Speaker 2: There are so many people I love that I want

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Speaker 2: to follow, and I barely have time to consume the

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Speaker 2: things I love.

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Speaker 3: Why would I fill any of my time with things

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Speaker 3: I hate?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: That just feels terrible, but so many people thrive on it.

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Speaker 4: I know. How did it feel doing dancing? I came

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Speaker 4: to one of the tapings, by the way, it was

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Speaker 4: so fun to see you doing your things, Like I'm

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Speaker 4: just like, oh my gosh, you just don't know what

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Speaker 4: someone is like what other things someone can do or

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Speaker 4: like can like dedicate and work on and discipline themselves with.

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Speaker 4: And it was so fun to see you.

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Speaker 3: Dancing with the stars.

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Speaker 4: I've had so many people say are you going to

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Speaker 4: would you do dancing with the stars? And I think

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Speaker 4: it would be fun, Oh my gosh, but it seems

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Speaker 4: so intimidating. How because it's just like another moment to

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Speaker 4: be in a like I think I get traumatized by competitions, yes,

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Speaker 4: of course, And like, how was it being in a

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Speaker 4: competition for you? Have you done competitions before like that.

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Speaker 2: I had never done a competition like that before. But

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Speaker 2: I am a pretty competitive person. I liked I like

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Speaker 2: to win. I like to do well at something. I'm

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Speaker 2: a type a personality. I want to be the best

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Speaker 2: at things that I do.

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Speaker 4: I want to be the very best.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. I'm thinking, so glad you're saying it.

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Speaker 2: I did. I was thinking, I'm going to go in there.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to of course, I want to be nice

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Speaker 2: to all these people, but I'm in a competition with them.

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Speaker 4: No.

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Speaker 2: I walked in, I was like, I love all, want

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Speaker 2: you all to do so well. I wanted that for

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Speaker 2: myself too, But it didn't change the idea that whether

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Speaker 2: I won or lost, or came in last or first,

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Speaker 2: as long as I was rooting for everyone to be

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Speaker 2: doing the very best they could that week, it was

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Speaker 2: all going to work out however it was supposed to.

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Speaker 3: It was all just going to work out. I just

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Speaker 3: knew it was going to work out.

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Speaker 2: It's gonna be fine, and I was going to have

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Speaker 2: as much fun as I possibly could until they yanked

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Speaker 2: me out of the dance floor.

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Speaker 3: And I did.

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Speaker 2: I just every moment loved it, loved it, loved it,

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Speaker 2: and it is it is intimidating.

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Speaker 3: Did you grow up dancing at all?

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Speaker 4: A little bit? Yeah, my parents had me in some

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Speaker 4: like like kids production like things where they would perform and.

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Speaker 2: Say okay for a little bit, So you don't have

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Speaker 2: like a dance background, like you're not going to be

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Speaker 2: walking into it with Yeah, So it is that part

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Speaker 2: is a little intimidating because in every season there are

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Speaker 2: other people that do exactly like a Whitney and who.

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Speaker 4: There was someone else who had grown up with on

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Speaker 4: your season.

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Speaker 2: Well, Elaine Hendrix had been a dancer, Alex Earl had

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Speaker 2: been a dancer, and.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, you know you.

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Speaker 2: I was ended up on a team with Jordan Chiles,

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Speaker 2: who's a gold medal Olympic athlete, and Whitney love it

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Speaker 2: and then me and I was like, oh, I get

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Speaker 2: to be.

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Speaker 3: The I get to be their Well well.

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Speaker 2: I mean I did come in eighth, so you know, no,

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Speaker 2: but it was it was so fun.

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Speaker 3: I really had the time of my life.

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Speaker 2: And if I could in any way encourage you to

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Speaker 2: do it, if they ask and you want to talk

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Speaker 2: about anything, I let me tell you would. I think

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Speaker 2: you would love it. I really do. I think you

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Speaker 2: would be shocked at how hopefully not triggering. The live

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Speaker 2: show would probably feel a little triggering, because that's just

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Speaker 2: to be there.

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Speaker 4: Like even just in the audience, I get like I

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Speaker 4: freak out. Yeah, Like I don't know. Yah. So you're you.

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Speaker 4: It gave you, It gives you the jitters and the.

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Speaker 2: Jitters, especially that first that first live show, where the

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Speaker 2: good news is you get three full weeks to prep

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Speaker 2: that first dance, so you really do more than any

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Speaker 2: other will You really didn't feel prepared. You're like, I'm

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Speaker 2: not gonna forget my moves, unless, of course, you're one

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Speaker 2: of those people who steps out in front of a

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Speaker 2: live crowd and everything falls out.

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Speaker 3: Of your head. But for people like us, are you.

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Speaker 4: That person that happens to me? It happened to me

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Speaker 4: on American Idol like I would.

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Speaker 2: The weeks you picked your own song right, and that

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Speaker 2: made you feel I'm telling you, I think it was

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Speaker 2: a self fulfilling prophecy. I think, you, why why.

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Speaker 4: Do we do that? Why do we like tell ourselves

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Speaker 4: and like make it happen like we believe it's so

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Speaker 4: much that we make sure it happens.

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Speaker 3: What you send your energy to is going to your energy? Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you gotta, you gotta.

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Speaker 2: You were just so nervous about the fact that you

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Speaker 2: were choosing your own song, so much of your energy

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Speaker 2: was going to all the bad things that might happen

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Speaker 2: because I'm not letting my dad pick.

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Speaker 3: But then that's what I almost feel like.

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Speaker 4: I almost feel like it's like this incapable of me.

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Speaker 4: Is I coming in where I'm like, I'm imagine myself

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Speaker 4: on this show. So I'm like, I can't do this

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Speaker 4: on my own. Danielle tell me what I need to do.

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Speaker 4: I need someone to guide me. I'm like, wait, David,

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Speaker 4: come on, take us that back.

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Speaker 2: You can I give you something that works for me.

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Speaker 2: That may sound very hippie dippy, but I'm gonna explain.

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Speaker 4: It because I love that. I'd that before.

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Speaker 3: That's very hippie dippy.

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Speaker 2: I do a lot of visualization, but I visualize like

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Speaker 2: I close my eyes.

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Speaker 3: And I visualize all my.

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Speaker 2: Cells inside my body. Imagine yourself shrinking down really really small,

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Speaker 2: going up through your nose into your body, and then

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Speaker 2: all your little cells inside your body. Some of them

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Speaker 2: have little outfits on.

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Speaker 3: You have nurse cells, doctor cells that are.

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Speaker 2: Working to repair you. So something's ailing you. I envisioned

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Speaker 2: those like doctor cells inside my body, but they're all

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Speaker 2: little versions of you. You're healing yourself, and you can

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Speaker 2: travel to different parts of your body that maybe need

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Speaker 2: a pep talk or energy. Maybe it's your heart center,

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Speaker 2: and so you go visit your heart. What do the

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Speaker 2: cells that are working on repairing your heart look like?

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Speaker 2: What do they say, what do they do? What do

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Speaker 2: you need? What do you need to hear more of?

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Speaker 2: And I ens I will really spend a lot of

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Speaker 2: time visualizing how I want something to go, how I

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Speaker 2: want my body to heal, how I want my heart

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Speaker 2: to feel. And then when I feel like I've visualized

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Speaker 2: it to the point that I feel calm, that I

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Speaker 2: feel centered, I feel empowered, I feel supported. I then

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Speaker 2: travel back up and out of my body the same

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Speaker 2: way I came and become my big self again beautiful.

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Speaker 2: Now I get to go back out into the world

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Speaker 2: having healed myself in that way. So if you're looking

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Speaker 2: to change energy, you feel like, you know what, I'm

385
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Speaker 2: wrapped in a loop, and it's not a positive loop.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna shrink myself, send myself into my mind.

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Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 2: You'll heal those things for yourself and it helps that

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Speaker 2: then it's you doing the work and that you don't

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Speaker 2: have to give it to someone else. You don't like

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Speaker 2: that you have to give it to a dad or

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Speaker 2: a podcast host.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you were in control. Yeah, even though you know

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Speaker 4: what was funny to see, Like I loved that. It

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Speaker 4: reminded me. There's this like a reel that I saw

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Speaker 4: this morning where it's like this girl's like, I'm gonna

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Speaker 4: you want a quantum leap with me? Oh, and she

398
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Speaker 4: like takes you back to like a place where you

399
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Speaker 4: envision yourself succeeding in the thing that you already did.

400
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Speaker 4: Like you're on your phone call with your friend and

401
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Speaker 4: I wish I remember her name, but it just came

402
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,280
Speaker 4: up when I was getting ready and she was like, yeah,

403
00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:51,959
Speaker 4: it just you're on your phone with your friend at

404
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Speaker 4: six months from now, and you've done the thing that

405
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Speaker 4: you were waiting to do and envision yourself like what

406
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,520
Speaker 4: does it feel like in the and so you're like

407
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,640
Speaker 4: imagining and thinking like what did you do that helped

408
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Speaker 4: you get there? And then you can still be back

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Speaker 4: here and you know what you need to do. It's

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Speaker 4: it was such a cool feeling. Yes, instead of letting

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Speaker 4: fear and hesitation and like but what ifs? Yeah, control

412
00:20:18,040 --> 00:20:21,879
Speaker 4: every step forward. It was so cool to like push

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00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:24,159
Speaker 4: that away for a moment like that's what if. This

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Speaker 4: reminded me of absolutely that is.

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Speaker 3: It is basically the same thing.

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Speaker 2: It's setting yourself up for the success that you inevitably

417
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Speaker 2: want to have and to see yourself doing it and

418
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Speaker 2: accomplishing it. David, I am so thankful that you came

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Speaker 2: and spent your time with me. I'm so thankful and

420
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Speaker 2: grateful for your book. I really enjoyed every second of it.

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Speaker 2: I want everyone to go out and get it before

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Speaker 2: I let you so one last thing. I keep saying

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Speaker 2: this before I let you go and then I keep

424
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Speaker 2: you here. What is what are your current goals, what's

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Speaker 2: your current relationship with music? And what do you want

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Speaker 2: to see and do and accomplish next?

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Speaker 4: Well I am doing I've been working on a Christmas album,

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Speaker 4: so I've done two already, but.

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Speaker 3: I've loved Christmas albums.

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Speaker 4: I wanted to do one that was more fun because

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Speaker 4: where I was in my first album it was very religious. Yep,

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Speaker 4: I was and I was very religious, so it was

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Speaker 4: a reflection of where I was. So I want to

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Speaker 4: do a Christmas album reflecting where I am now. It's

435
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Speaker 4: like more fun. I have like one that's even Like

436
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Speaker 4: I've been experimenting with Spanglish, doing Spanlish because I lived

437
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:45,840
Speaker 4: my life Spanlish. I'm half Hispanic, and I did. I

438
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Speaker 4: released an EP last year where I had a couple songs,

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Speaker 4: like I had a song called Criumberley that I like

440
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:53,679
Speaker 4: was it was in Spanlish. Yeah, so I'm doing that

441
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:59,399
Speaker 4: with Christmas now and just uh I you know. And

442
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,200
Speaker 4: also the thing that I quantum leapd with what It's

443
00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:04,840
Speaker 4: not music, but I was thinking about the book, like

444
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:07,359
Speaker 4: what do I want to see the book helped me accomplish,

445
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:09,520
Speaker 4: and where I saw myself in six months, I was like,

446
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,160
Speaker 4: if I could have something like a quantum leak kind

447
00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:14,280
Speaker 4: of experience, it would be to make it so that

448
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:19,679
Speaker 4: religion no longer like having the discussion and even like

449
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 4: bringing forth to like courts and like a country and stuff,

450
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:25,879
Speaker 4: at least here in the US. To make it so

451
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:29,160
Speaker 4: that it's not a thing where it's like churches feel

452
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:32,000
Speaker 4: like they need to protect their religious freedom by not

453
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 4: allowing gay relationships to be a thing because there's so

454
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:41,120
Speaker 4: much misunderstanding towards the gay community and what a gay

455
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:46,520
Speaker 4: relationship is and what God, what God would think of

456
00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:50,199
Speaker 4: of that. I'm like, these are so many misconceptions, and

457
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 4: I'm like, my God, the experiences I've had were not

458
00:22:54,720 --> 00:22:57,960
Speaker 4: anything what any church is teaching right now. And I

459
00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:00,560
Speaker 4: think people a lot of people feel it. It's like

460
00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:02,520
Speaker 4: my church is saying this, but I feel one way,

461
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:06,159
Speaker 4: and I feel like that's the God and people telling

462
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:09,119
Speaker 4: them where things need to move towards. And I'm like,

463
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:12,960
Speaker 4: but there's I feel like there's too many protections, legal

464
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 4: protections that I know people in my church, like the

465
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:20,520
Speaker 4: prophet of the church currently Dalan Chokes. We used to

466
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:22,600
Speaker 4: work for this, used to be like a judge in

467
00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:27,399
Speaker 4: the Supreme Court, And he spent decades working on the

468
00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:32,359
Speaker 4: other end of defending marriage and defending religious freedom, which

469
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:36,520
Speaker 4: he would expound on. And it was defending his right

470
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:39,959
Speaker 4: to discriminate and not allow gay marriage and gay people

471
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:44,240
Speaker 4: to practice their lives in his church. And I'm like,

472
00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:47,280
Speaker 4: if one person can have that much influence, what can

473
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 4: one person have influence on the other side? And I'm like,

474
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,240
Speaker 4: the problem is it's not just the Mormon Church, it's

475
00:23:55,920 --> 00:24:00,399
Speaker 4: religion in general. It's you know, almost all which is due.

476
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:03,600
Speaker 4: But I'm like, oh, I feel like they're too enabled

477
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:10,480
Speaker 4: to continue having misconceptions and discriminating. They're not challenged to say, well,

478
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:12,920
Speaker 4: what if this isn't what if this is an old

479
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,840
Speaker 4: way of thinking that I'm still able to get away

480
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:19,200
Speaker 4: with because legally I'm allowed to if they were challenged legally,

481
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 4: And I mean, I know that's a dangerous thing. Maybe

482
00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:23,760
Speaker 4: people are like, how dare you try and threaten my

483
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:25,639
Speaker 4: religious But it's like that's how you've been conditioned to

484
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:29,600
Speaker 4: look at it as. Because someone decided to love each

485
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,760
Speaker 4: other and they go to your church building is not

486
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:37,359
Speaker 4: going to entice your children to you know, it's not

487
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:38,719
Speaker 4: going to be a threat to your children the way

488
00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:41,240
Speaker 4: you think it is, right, you know, I look at

489
00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:43,480
Speaker 4: Lance and Michael, I look at my other friends who've

490
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:47,600
Speaker 4: been married for decades in gay relationships, and they just

491
00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 4: live a simple, peaceful life. They they've learned how to

492
00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:56,320
Speaker 4: do the work within their families and their friendships where

493
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:58,200
Speaker 4: they understand and they respect them.

494
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:02,600
Speaker 2: And it's not like heterosexual marriages are all I mean,

495
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:07,760
Speaker 2: come on, like, yeah, divorce exactly, divorces and swinging and

496
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 2: you know, it's like, it's not like, well, very clearly

497
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:13,240
Speaker 2: heterosexual marriage is calm and peaceful and screen all the time.

498
00:25:13,280 --> 00:25:15,920
Speaker 4: It's like and there are a lot of lavender marriages, yep,

499
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:19,439
Speaker 4: which is you know, someone who's gay in marrying a

500
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:22,320
Speaker 4: heterosexual person or two gay people marrying each other, and

501
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:25,679
Speaker 4: there's a lot of neglect, a lot of abuse, a

502
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:28,960
Speaker 4: lot of resentment, bitterness. That was when my when I

503
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:30,560
Speaker 4: found out from one of my friends I talk about

504
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 4: in the book that she was in a marriage where

505
00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:35,879
Speaker 4: he was keeping secrets and when he couldn't hold it

506
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 4: in anymore, he started beating her. Yeah, and I was

507
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,479
Speaker 4: just like that's where I'm leading to, And I'm like,

508
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:42,800
Speaker 4: there's what how is that a good marriage? I'm like, yeah,

509
00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 4: they're producing children, but a lot of children grow up

510
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:51,280
Speaker 4: really difficult lives and as orphans, as foster kids, not

511
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:54,399
Speaker 4: getting the love that they deserve. And so it's like,

512
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:56,919
Speaker 4: not everything looks the way that it's painted, Like, we

513
00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:00,480
Speaker 4: only want to show the good, the success story. Yeah,

514
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:05,640
Speaker 4: and there's so many not success stories. But so with

515
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 4: even with heterosexual of course, ideal choices and stuff. So

516
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:15,480
Speaker 4: I want to challenge courts and say, why do you

517
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:18,480
Speaker 4: give them so much freedom to discriminate because it prevents

518
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,040
Speaker 4: them from ever having to look at it differently, and

519
00:26:21,119 --> 00:26:24,359
Speaker 4: probably in the way that in that if there is

520
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 4: a god, it would be the way God would want

521
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:31,439
Speaker 4: them to try and expand their perspective on it and

522
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:34,919
Speaker 4: to change their way of looking at it. Because if

523
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:37,720
Speaker 4: there's a God, he keeps creating gay people and they're

524
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:40,480
Speaker 4: not the monsters. They're not the perverts that you make

525
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:43,120
Speaker 4: them out to be. You know a lot of times

526
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,760
Speaker 4: they blend in and you so you would never even know. Yeah,

527
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:48,400
Speaker 4: and they because they never bother anybody and they never

528
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:49,920
Speaker 4: bother you. And if anything. They add a lot of

529
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:54,879
Speaker 4: beauty and color to your life. So I want to

530
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:57,840
Speaker 4: make it. You know, the US is a trendsetter in

531
00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 4: a lot of ways. If we change that. There have

532
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:03,880
Speaker 4: been were they almost I mean they they almost made progress,

533
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 4: like even in like the seventies and whatnot, like but

534
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:14,040
Speaker 4: you know, the religious communities that were did not understand

535
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 4: it voice their opinion and so they won. But I'm like,

536
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:20,560
Speaker 4: if if you have the right conversations and the right arguments,

537
00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 4: you can make change. And so I want that to happen.

538
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:25,359
Speaker 4: That's that's my quantum leap.

539
00:27:25,440 --> 00:27:28,399
Speaker 3: I love it. That is your quantum leap. You've manifested it.

540
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,560
Speaker 2: You can get David's incredible book Devout Losing My Faith

541
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 2: to find Myself right now wherever you get books, but

542
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:38,120
Speaker 2: maybe go to a local bookseller, that would be nice.

543
00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 2: I can't recommend this book enough. You have quite a

544
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 2: story to tell. Thank you so much for being here

545
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:45,240
Speaker 2: sharing a bit of it with me. You're just stuck

546
00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:45,520
Speaker 2: with me.

547
00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:46,440
Speaker 4: I love it.

548
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,719
Speaker 2: Teen Beat is an iHeart podcast produced and hosted by

549
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:54,359
Speaker 2: Danielle Fischel. Executive producers Jensen Karp and Amy Sugarman, Executive

550
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 2: in charge of production Danielle Romo, producer and editor Tara Subosch.

551
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 2: The theme song is I'm Mark Coppus, Yes that Mark Coppus.

552
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 2: Follow us on Instagram at teenbetpod

553
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:08,920
Speaker 3: M