1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,199 Speaker 1: Hey there, everybody. Welcome to this episode of Amy and TJ. 2 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,560 Speaker 1: This is another one of our special episodes in our 3 00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: Love Stories series where we count you down to Valentine's 4 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:13,360 Speaker 1: Day and ask our couples who come from all different 5 00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:15,840 Speaker 1: walks of life, who are in lots of different types 6 00:00:15,880 --> 00:00:20,200 Speaker 1: of relationships, what the key is to their relationships success. 7 00:00:20,239 --> 00:00:23,200 Speaker 2: And we ask our couples all the same questions. 8 00:00:24,040 --> 00:00:27,200 Speaker 1: This time we are talking to Joan Vasso's you know 9 00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:30,640 Speaker 1: her from the Golden Bachelorette and the man she met 10 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:34,480 Speaker 1: on the show Chalk Chappelle. They got engaged in July 11 00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 1: of twenty twenty four, and we check in with the 12 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:38,800 Speaker 1: couple to see where they are now. 13 00:00:38,840 --> 00:00:41,800 Speaker 2: Here is Joan and Chuck's love story. 14 00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:48,919 Speaker 3: This is Amy and TJ Love Stories. 15 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:59,280 Speaker 2: And we have Joan and Chalk with us right now. 16 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:00,520 Speaker 4: We have person. 17 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:05,720 Speaker 1: We have Chalk long distance, which kind of is appropriate 18 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,200 Speaker 1: given the status of. 19 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,480 Speaker 2: Your relationship right now. How we do it? 20 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:12,760 Speaker 1: How? How what is that like to always be in 21 00:01:12,800 --> 00:01:14,800 Speaker 1: a different state from one another? 22 00:01:14,959 --> 00:01:16,960 Speaker 4: I know, well, we're not always in a different state. 23 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,400 Speaker 4: We actually merge a pretty pretty often. In fact, we 24 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:23,280 Speaker 4: spent the whole month of December and early January together, 25 00:01:23,319 --> 00:01:26,640 Speaker 4: we got a place in New York and we actually 26 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:29,200 Speaker 4: lived together, which is the first thing, the first time 27 00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 4: we've done that for more than like a few days 28 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,080 Speaker 4: at a time or a week at a time. 29 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:33,360 Speaker 2: So that was great. 30 00:01:33,480 --> 00:01:35,920 Speaker 4: We had a wonderful time. It's always been like both 31 00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:37,520 Speaker 4: of his and my dream to live in New York. 32 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,360 Speaker 4: So we got a little taste of it, and I 33 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,559 Speaker 4: think we'll do it again and maybe do it more 34 00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,240 Speaker 4: for a longer time, you know, longer period of time 35 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:46,679 Speaker 4: next time. But we merged a lot. We know, we 36 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:48,920 Speaker 4: go on vacations together. We have opportunities like this, We 37 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:51,760 Speaker 4: come to La to do iHeart stuff and other things. 38 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:55,760 Speaker 4: So we end up being together like at least once 39 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:56,480 Speaker 4: every three weeks. 40 00:01:56,880 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 3: We'll chuck. You all are our first law long distance 41 00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 3: couple that we have interviewed as a part of our 42 00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:06,040 Speaker 3: Love Story series. So we've asked everybody the same questions. 43 00:02:06,040 --> 00:02:08,519 Speaker 3: We'll start with you, and I will tell you all first. 44 00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:11,040 Speaker 3: The first question seems to be the one that trips 45 00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:13,520 Speaker 3: everybody up the most chocked, So I'm gonna. 46 00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:14,760 Speaker 5: Start all right. 47 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:19,520 Speaker 3: Question number one, just in five words or less, describe 48 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:23,520 Speaker 3: your relationship today. How would you characterize it in five 49 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:24,280 Speaker 3: words or less. 50 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:30,000 Speaker 5: Very deep, very loving and enjoyable. 51 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:36,679 Speaker 4: Nice jump, amazing, second chance at love? 52 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 3: Wow? 53 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:39,240 Speaker 4: Love that all right? 54 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:40,680 Speaker 2: Who said I love you first? 55 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:42,200 Speaker 5: Oh? 56 00:02:42,240 --> 00:02:42,639 Speaker 3: I did? 57 00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:43,600 Speaker 5: It was on TV. 58 00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:49,880 Speaker 1: Can't deny that, And you couldn't say I love you back? 59 00:02:49,919 --> 00:02:50,239 Speaker 2: Correct? 60 00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:54,320 Speaker 4: You can, you can. But if you look at like 61 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:58,040 Speaker 4: previous batchlor seasons, like the people that do that end 62 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:00,400 Speaker 4: up getting a lot of crap at the end because 63 00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:02,560 Speaker 4: they end up have maybe said it to two or 64 00:03:02,639 --> 00:03:04,760 Speaker 4: three people. I mean, Gary did it, when Becher did it, 65 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:08,000 Speaker 4: said it to three people, and that comes back to 66 00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:10,920 Speaker 4: haunt you because the final person was like, well you 67 00:03:10,919 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 4: you know you love two other people. So I was 68 00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:14,959 Speaker 4: really careful not to ever say. 69 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:17,320 Speaker 3: Did you feel it? Though? I just you wouldn't allow 70 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:18,480 Speaker 3: yourself to go there though. 71 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,560 Speaker 4: Not really I wouldn't let myself go there. Plus, you know, 72 00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:22,000 Speaker 4: when you invest. 73 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 5: I disagree that eighteen year old girl deal with me 74 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:31,760 Speaker 5: going I really really really like you. 75 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 4: Yeah that was right. 76 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,960 Speaker 5: Some people take a little bit longer than others. 77 00:03:39,240 --> 00:03:42,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm a slow burn. When did you tell him 78 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 4: you loved him? The day that we got engaged? I 79 00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:46,560 Speaker 4: saved it and back you know, at that point I 80 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:48,880 Speaker 4: wanted it to be a special day, and even though 81 00:03:48,920 --> 00:03:50,800 Speaker 4: I knew I felt it, I didn't want to say 82 00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:52,680 Speaker 4: it like prematurely, like the day before or two days 83 00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,880 Speaker 4: before that. I thought it was special to do it 84 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:57,680 Speaker 4: like when he got down on Wendy. Oh wow. 85 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,920 Speaker 1: Okay, So normally we would ask how long you dated 86 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:03,040 Speaker 1: before you got engaged, But this is a little bit 87 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:06,440 Speaker 1: awkward because it all happened on TV on TV and 88 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:08,760 Speaker 1: you were dating other men at the same time. 89 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,920 Speaker 4: Yeah, there was that what has your. 90 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,640 Speaker 2: Engagement period been like? 91 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:16,159 Speaker 1: And we usually then ask how long were you engaged 92 00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:18,640 Speaker 1: before you got married? So do you have a timeline 93 00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 1: for the wedding and what's the engagement period been like? 94 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:26,240 Speaker 4: So the engagement period has been like so fun, Like 95 00:04:26,279 --> 00:04:29,279 Speaker 4: we're just living in this school world and we don't 96 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:31,200 Speaker 4: have any obligation to get married because we're not like 97 00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:33,640 Speaker 4: trying to have babies. You know, we're a different stage 98 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:35,719 Speaker 4: of our lives. So probably different than most people that 99 00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,400 Speaker 4: you've interviewed that are thinking wedding and thinking about creating 100 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,479 Speaker 4: a life together. We both kind of already have really 101 00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:44,920 Speaker 4: rich lives and I'm like, you guys, and if. 102 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 5: I can interject, if I can interject real quick. I 103 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:49,680 Speaker 5: think there might be somebody on this podcast it's been 104 00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:50,880 Speaker 5: engaged for three years. 105 00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:58,120 Speaker 3: Three years? Not quite just I know, I know you 106 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 3: got that right, felt like that, Jocko. 107 00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:03,920 Speaker 5: Well's I read that because I wented to did a 108 00:05:03,920 --> 00:05:07,520 Speaker 5: little bit of research. Engaged for three years, so you know, 109 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:09,400 Speaker 5: the internet might not always be faction. 110 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,600 Speaker 3: But I think the last time where we engaged, the 111 00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:14,200 Speaker 3: last time we saw I don't know if we saw I. 112 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:16,200 Speaker 4: Don't think so a jingle ball with you guys, and 113 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:18,359 Speaker 4: you were engaged, but I think the year before you 114 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:18,640 Speaker 4: were not. 115 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:22,359 Speaker 1: No, Yes, we got engaged in September last. 116 00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:24,000 Speaker 3: Year, so talk we got some celebrating to do with 117 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:24,719 Speaker 3: you when you see. 118 00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:26,800 Speaker 4: When we saw that, that's right, Champagne. 119 00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:29,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, So how I know you're not living 120 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:31,480 Speaker 1: in the same house and maybe you don't have some 121 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:35,480 Speaker 1: of the same frustrations or the daily arguments that a 122 00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:38,359 Speaker 1: lot of couples have. But how often do you fight 123 00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:40,520 Speaker 1: and what do you fight about? Huh? 124 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 4: I don't think we've ever fought. 125 00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:48,359 Speaker 5: Really, We've had We've had things as any adult couple has, 126 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:55,039 Speaker 5: where you have different thoughts, different beliefs, and when you 127 00:05:55,080 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 5: get older, some of it's a little important, but you 128 00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:01,359 Speaker 5: work on going. It's really not that important. Communications. So 129 00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 5: we've not not had a drag down, you know, knockdown, 130 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 5: drag out fight. We've had a couple of things going. 131 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:08,640 Speaker 5: You know, I'd like for you not to say that, 132 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:11,680 Speaker 5: or you know, let's not do that, those type of things. 133 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:15,599 Speaker 3: It sounds like time, experience, maturity keeps you from having 134 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,320 Speaker 3: the fights you know better, is what it sounds like. 135 00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:18,080 Speaker 3: Is that right, Jack? 136 00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:21,279 Speaker 5: Absolutely, because I'm going to lose it doesn't make a difference. 137 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:28,080 Speaker 4: But he is very easy going, so you know, if 138 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,640 Speaker 4: something bothers him, if he mentions it, I know it's important, 139 00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,799 Speaker 4: So I you know, I take that into account. 140 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:34,120 Speaker 2: That's very good. 141 00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:36,159 Speaker 1: And we we have asked all of our couples this, 142 00:06:36,240 --> 00:06:38,440 Speaker 1: but I think we already know the answer. Have you 143 00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:41,640 Speaker 1: ever come close to calling it quitz, to saying this 144 00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 1: is too hard? Maybe given the distance, maybe given the 145 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:46,840 Speaker 1: public pressure. I know you all deal with a lot 146 00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:49,720 Speaker 1: of rumors about whether or not you're still together. Does 147 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:53,080 Speaker 1: any of that actually put pressure on your relationship? 148 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:56,520 Speaker 5: If I can't, I'd say absolutely not. From the fact 149 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,120 Speaker 5: is we just laugh about him and we'll call each 150 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:00,520 Speaker 5: other and go, you heard the lame atest one. 151 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:02,600 Speaker 3: Yeah. Really, it's just it's it's just. 152 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:05,560 Speaker 5: It's social media, it's the internet, it's the news. It 153 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,159 Speaker 5: is so inaccurate. And there's been a couple of times 154 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:09,800 Speaker 5: where like we really didn't like that, Like there was 155 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:12,240 Speaker 5: a story that came out that Jone had passed. Yeah, 156 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:13,240 Speaker 5: and that's pretty personal. 157 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 4: Tragic car accident as in dyed Yeah yeah, yes, tragic 158 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:17,800 Speaker 4: car accident while I was on vacation. 159 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:19,680 Speaker 3: Wow. 160 00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:20,440 Speaker 4: Yeah, weird. 161 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:21,720 Speaker 3: Yeah. 162 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:24,160 Speaker 5: And then so you you know, you go, oh, it's just, 163 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:26,760 Speaker 5: you know, it's it's it's the news, it's whatever. But 164 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 5: then when you have friend calling you and texting you, 165 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 5: you go, I wish that wouldn't happen. 166 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, and you got to skin and there's pictures of 167 00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:35,320 Speaker 4: an ore that' said rip with a like a like 168 00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:37,880 Speaker 4: a Jesus Day I died, And it was Yeah, it 169 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,000 Speaker 4: kind of hits you a little bit. 170 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 3: Did you know it wasn't true? 171 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:41,000 Speaker 4: Obviously? 172 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 3: Did you all address that one? I mean talk you're 173 00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:45,559 Speaker 3: kind of talking to Stuff's out there is just silly. 174 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:47,920 Speaker 3: Does every does anything ever rise to a level where 175 00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:50,800 Speaker 3: you will feel like you do need to respond, Like 176 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:53,800 Speaker 3: something like she's dead. Did you do anything just let 177 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:54,160 Speaker 3: it all go? 178 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 5: Yeah. 179 00:07:54,680 --> 00:07:56,800 Speaker 4: I think I made a point of like putting something 180 00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:58,920 Speaker 4: on Instagram of me talking or I don't remember it was, 181 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,320 Speaker 4: but I didn't say like I didn't die. 182 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:01,080 Speaker 3: Proof of life. 183 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:01,320 Speaker 5: Yeah. 184 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:01,920 Speaker 4: Yeah. 185 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:05,320 Speaker 5: We're really good at bouncing things off each other because 186 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 5: one of us might be elevated a little bit, and 187 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,480 Speaker 5: it's usually me that's going to be a little bit 188 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:11,200 Speaker 5: more elevated and Jones going just let it go, it's 189 00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:13,040 Speaker 5: just what it is. And the next day you just 190 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 5: laugh and go And that's where Jon's really good. 191 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:18,280 Speaker 4: The less air you get, most things they'll go away. 192 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,400 Speaker 4: I do feel like we every once in a while 193 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,400 Speaker 4: need to address the rumors like that we've broken up, 194 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 4: because I think that people like really invest in like 195 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:27,320 Speaker 4: you falling in love, and they watch the show and 196 00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:29,440 Speaker 4: they put time into it, and they're excited for you, 197 00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:31,120 Speaker 4: and they want to make sure that it's still going on. 198 00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:34,959 Speaker 4: And it seems fairly often if I don't or if 199 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:38,640 Speaker 4: we don't have a picture of us someplace together, or 200 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:41,199 Speaker 4: you know, have an interaction with the two of us, 201 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:43,880 Speaker 4: we they say that we've broken up. So I think 202 00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:45,520 Speaker 4: we need to do a better job, and it's kind 203 00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:46,840 Speaker 4: of on my plate because I'm more of the social 204 00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:49,160 Speaker 4: media person than he is to like say, hey, come 205 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:50,680 Speaker 4: sit next to me. We've got to talk on like 206 00:08:50,720 --> 00:08:53,920 Speaker 4: film and put a video, right, so people don't say 207 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 4: that we've broken up. 208 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:58,760 Speaker 5: So j and Amy, excuse me. We did have an 209 00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:01,320 Speaker 5: issue over one thing. You don't called me because she 210 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:03,360 Speaker 5: was in Austin with some of the ladies from her 211 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:06,600 Speaker 5: show and there was some information out that I bought 212 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:09,400 Speaker 5: a ten point seven million dollar home in Austin, so 213 00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:12,080 Speaker 5: excited and she's like, I didn't have anything to do 214 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:15,040 Speaker 5: with this and I haven't even seen it yet. Give 215 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:15,760 Speaker 5: me the address. 216 00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:20,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, it was like awesome. 217 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:24,480 Speaker 1: Fake news I've heard all day. Would you all say 218 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:26,200 Speaker 1: that you're still in your honeymoon period? 219 00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:29,880 Speaker 4: Hmmm, I don't think honeymoon period. I don't think we 220 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:35,200 Speaker 4: really had a serious honeymoon period, to be honest. I 221 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,640 Speaker 4: think we kind of slid into this and became like 222 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:41,439 Speaker 4: super comfortable really quickly. And although we have some really 223 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 4: fun interactions. So when when you get engaged on TV 224 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:46,560 Speaker 4: and you have like those three months where you can't 225 00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,880 Speaker 4: see each other like in public, you do these happy 226 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:51,760 Speaker 4: couple of visits, which are in LA and they get 227 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:54,840 Speaker 4: you an airbnb and you go hiding out and it's 228 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:58,160 Speaker 4: actually really it's romantic. You can't see anybody, no one's 229 00:09:58,160 --> 00:10:01,079 Speaker 4: allowed over. You're you know, you have handlers that bring 230 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:02,960 Speaker 4: you food or whatever you need, Like you could call 231 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 4: and say, like I need a puppy dog today and 232 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:07,040 Speaker 4: they bring you on like they take great care of you. 233 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:09,280 Speaker 4: So you just get to hang out and like learn 234 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:13,440 Speaker 4: about each other. So it's really kind of like I mean, 235 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:14,640 Speaker 4: you come up the show and you take a real 236 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:16,520 Speaker 4: kind of a leap of faith. So I felt like 237 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:19,440 Speaker 4: I did talk to too that we got engaged. It 238 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:21,760 Speaker 4: was we were in love, but we didn't really know 239 00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:24,680 Speaker 4: each other outside of like bachelor. So that's a really 240 00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:27,880 Speaker 4: like controlled environment. So you get all of a sudden, 241 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:31,040 Speaker 4: these wonderful days together where you have nothing else to 242 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:33,680 Speaker 4: do but talk to each other. You can't leave the house, 243 00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 4: you can do nothing else, and that you know usually 244 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 4: has a pool and they're bringing you food and it's 245 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:40,240 Speaker 4: just a really really great time to get to know 246 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:41,839 Speaker 4: each other. So I would call that kind of the 247 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:44,480 Speaker 4: honeymoon period. But after that we just started like kind 248 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:47,080 Speaker 4: of living like normal, like old people that have been 249 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,240 Speaker 4: around with each other forever. 250 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:51,800 Speaker 5: You agree with that, I will say too ahead, but 251 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:53,880 Speaker 5: I will say too I'm sorry to keep jumping in. 252 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,640 Speaker 5: Is Joana and I and a lot of people have 253 00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:57,760 Speaker 5: been through things in their lives. But we've been through 254 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,560 Speaker 5: some tragedy and you look at big things is happening, 255 00:11:00,600 --> 00:11:03,760 Speaker 5: and so much life is just little things. And you know, 256 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:06,160 Speaker 5: we'll talk about it, we'll go you know, it's it's 257 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:09,200 Speaker 5: just life. It's going to go on. So I think 258 00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:11,040 Speaker 5: we we just look at the little things. Don't let 259 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:11,840 Speaker 5: them slow you down. 260 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:16,439 Speaker 1: I love that there's so much perspective having a relationship 261 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:19,160 Speaker 1: later after you've already been there, done that, you just 262 00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:20,839 Speaker 1: get it in a different way. 263 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:21,400 Speaker 3: Now. 264 00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:24,080 Speaker 1: I know again you guys don't live together, but you 265 00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,520 Speaker 1: had a month together. But in terms of do you 266 00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:29,760 Speaker 1: know when you do end up? And first of all, 267 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: is the idea to live in one house together? Yes' 268 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:35,439 Speaker 1: as okay, yeah, okay, do. 269 00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 4: You do you dale? 270 00:11:36,240 --> 00:11:38,800 Speaker 1: Have you thought about, like you say, the little things? 271 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,240 Speaker 1: But this can get under people's skins. Who does the cooking, 272 00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:44,400 Speaker 1: who does the cleaning, who does the laundry? How have 273 00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:46,040 Speaker 1: you all discussed any of that? 274 00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:49,280 Speaker 4: Not really because well, he everyone in all gives me 275 00:11:49,320 --> 00:11:51,760 Speaker 4: heck because I do a lot of cooking videos and 276 00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:53,959 Speaker 4: so they're like all of his friends say like, does 277 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,600 Speaker 4: she cook for you? And he's like, she's never made 278 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 4: me a meal, so. 279 00:11:57,080 --> 00:11:57,680 Speaker 3: But we haven't. 280 00:11:59,080 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 4: It's so true. I think, I think, I mean that 281 00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:07,800 Speaker 4: did happen. But we like, we're super social, so when 282 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,120 Speaker 4: we are together, we like going out with friends and 283 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:12,520 Speaker 4: doing stuff like out in like out in the wild, 284 00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:14,959 Speaker 4: because you know, we were pulled off in the bachelor 285 00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:17,520 Speaker 4: mansion and then like in the happy couple homes for 286 00:12:17,559 --> 00:12:19,280 Speaker 4: so long that we kind of got a lot. So 287 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:21,360 Speaker 4: we haven't figured out that part of it. But I 288 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:23,000 Speaker 4: think he should do all the cooking and all the 289 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:25,720 Speaker 4: cleaning and the laundry and all. 290 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,440 Speaker 5: I don't know, Amy, I would tell you the house. 291 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:31,280 Speaker 5: Let's say it's just five thousand square feet, it needs 292 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:34,120 Speaker 5: to be about thirty five hundred square feet for closet space. 293 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,840 Speaker 4: You should see the amount of clothes he has. 294 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:45,760 Speaker 5: That is the pot college just having fun. 295 00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:57,400 Speaker 4: That's so true. I know you don't. 296 00:12:57,960 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 1: You said you've never fought a lot of our questions 297 00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,520 Speaker 1: are about how people and how couples handle conflict. 298 00:13:02,559 --> 00:13:03,800 Speaker 4: Do you. So, do you have conflict? 299 00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,200 Speaker 1: Okay, do you have any rules like never going to 300 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:10,160 Speaker 1: bed angry, never cursing, never threatening to leave the relationship? 301 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:10,840 Speaker 3: Mm hmmm. 302 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:15,000 Speaker 4: We don't have any like drawl like a line in 303 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:18,560 Speaker 4: the sand things. But I feel like we are pretty 304 00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:23,080 Speaker 4: good about communicating. I think we only had one like 305 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,960 Speaker 4: silent treatment kind of a couple of days where there 306 00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:29,240 Speaker 4: was a conflict and I guess we weren't ready to talk. 307 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:30,840 Speaker 4: Who was the silent one? 308 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:31,520 Speaker 5: He was. 309 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,439 Speaker 2: Right, just like now. 310 00:13:38,720 --> 00:13:41,440 Speaker 5: And sometimes you're just better off just think things through. 311 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,520 Speaker 4: It drove me crazy. I was like, let's talk, like, yes, 312 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:48,360 Speaker 4: what are you mad about? 313 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:48,520 Speaker 1: So? 314 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:49,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, we got. 315 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,120 Speaker 4: There, but it took a little time. 316 00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:57,200 Speaker 1: Were you what where do you put the importance of 317 00:13:57,520 --> 00:14:01,000 Speaker 1: friendship in your relationship? I know people are all into 318 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,200 Speaker 1: the romance and that's great and that's awesome, but do 319 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:09,000 Speaker 1: you consider each other best friends or friendly? How do 320 00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:10,800 Speaker 1: you deal with that in your relationship? 321 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:12,079 Speaker 4: Yeah? Do you want to take that one? 322 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:14,480 Speaker 5: If I met Yeah, when we were in New York, 323 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,080 Speaker 5: the best times I had with Joan were usually in 324 00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:20,240 Speaker 5: the morning where we're having coffee and just talking as friends. 325 00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:23,280 Speaker 5: And we have she's got four kids, I've got too, 326 00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:25,720 Speaker 5: she's got grandkids. We've got a lot of things going on, 327 00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:28,920 Speaker 5: so we bounce things off each other, and that friendship 328 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:33,920 Speaker 5: has really blossomed over this fourteen fifteen months where you know, 329 00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:35,960 Speaker 5: there it's kind of like, they're my kids. I've got 330 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,520 Speaker 5: to deal with them. But what would you do? And 331 00:14:38,640 --> 00:14:41,120 Speaker 5: joan one time with my I should say one of 332 00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:43,560 Speaker 5: my kids, not going to mention the gender. She goes, 333 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,520 Speaker 5: they just mature a little bit later and her sons 334 00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:48,760 Speaker 5: are a little bit older than mine. And that's you know, 335 00:14:48,840 --> 00:14:51,280 Speaker 5: friendship of going, hey, I need some help or let 336 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:53,080 Speaker 5: me you know the old I use it saying too 337 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:54,480 Speaker 5: do you want to be right or do you want 338 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:56,080 Speaker 5: to be happy? Or do you want me to do something? 339 00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:58,360 Speaker 5: Or just listen? And we're very good at that. 340 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:01,080 Speaker 4: Yeah you said that really early on in our relationship. 341 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 4: He's so I was telling him something like something that 342 00:15:03,920 --> 00:15:05,720 Speaker 4: happened that day. He goes, do you want me to 343 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:07,240 Speaker 4: give advice or do you want me to just listen? 344 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,720 Speaker 4: I'm like, huh, I think I want just listen this time. 345 00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:11,760 Speaker 4: Or I'll say, oh, I think advice this time. So 346 00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:15,880 Speaker 4: he's really good about not interjecting but listening and then 347 00:15:16,200 --> 00:15:17,200 Speaker 4: ask me what I need from it. 348 00:15:17,480 --> 00:15:21,560 Speaker 3: That is a great practical, little piece of advice. That's 349 00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:24,800 Speaker 3: a nugget that can help everybody's relationship. That's good stuff. 350 00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:28,200 Speaker 1: Yeah, that was good stuff. That's amazing. Actually, I think 351 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 1: we could both use that. Like that is such a 352 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:33,120 Speaker 1: perfect because sometimes you actually don't know what the right 353 00:15:33,160 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 1: thing is to do, and asking that's really cool. 354 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,200 Speaker 4: Or sometimes just venting helps you get to the place 355 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 4: you need to figure out the answer. But you have 356 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,040 Speaker 4: to vent to somebody who's going to be like, I 357 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:44,560 Speaker 4: don't feel like he judges me. Like I can tell 358 00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,360 Speaker 4: him the worst part of me and he doesn't judge, 359 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 4: and so like I can get to maybe where I 360 00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:52,120 Speaker 4: need to be by just talking. Or sometimes I need 361 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:53,280 Speaker 4: like tell me what you would do. 362 00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,960 Speaker 1: That's very very cool, do you all And not that 363 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:00,520 Speaker 1: you're speaking of judgment sitting here on your pedestal judging 364 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:04,640 Speaker 1: other couples, but obviously you've lived enough life and you've 365 00:16:04,680 --> 00:16:07,120 Speaker 1: seen and you've had your own other relationships. Do you 366 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:10,680 Speaker 1: see something that other couples do that you can now 367 00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:12,800 Speaker 1: look and say, ooh, that's a mistake, Like. 368 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:14,080 Speaker 2: Please don't do this. 369 00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:17,440 Speaker 1: I know so many people who listen to this podcast 370 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:20,840 Speaker 1: and these episodes, these love story episodes, are looking for advice, 371 00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:24,800 Speaker 1: are looking for answers to solutions, and maybe you're having 372 00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:27,920 Speaker 1: difficulty in their own relationships. What is there something you 373 00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:31,280 Speaker 1: see other couples do and you say, please do not 374 00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:34,200 Speaker 1: do X that I certainly do. 375 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:34,840 Speaker 4: How about your talk? 376 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,680 Speaker 5: I think a lot of it, especially with some of 377 00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:41,160 Speaker 5: the people that I work with, is you've got to 378 00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:44,080 Speaker 5: put your family first. When you're young, you're trying to 379 00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:45,920 Speaker 5: make money to buy the house, to put the kids 380 00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,280 Speaker 5: in school, to put clothes on them, right, You've got 381 00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:51,040 Speaker 5: to put your family first. And I changed my working hours. 382 00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:53,480 Speaker 5: I'm involved with two businesses where we close at four 383 00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:56,120 Speaker 5: thirty and that way people can get home, they can 384 00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:58,120 Speaker 5: beat traffic, they can go to the grocery store, and 385 00:16:58,120 --> 00:17:01,040 Speaker 5: that type of thing that that's important to me. In 386 00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:03,400 Speaker 5: my thirties and forties, I work sixty to seventy hours 387 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:05,199 Speaker 5: a week. That's just how it was made. That's what 388 00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,840 Speaker 5: we did. And you look now and it's it's tough 389 00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:10,200 Speaker 5: because a lot of times you have dual income families. 390 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:13,560 Speaker 5: They're working, they're helping grandkids, they're doing that type of stuff. 391 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:16,760 Speaker 5: So just being considerate and really understanding what the other 392 00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:17,680 Speaker 5: person's going through. 393 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:24,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, mine is probably more simple. I feel like, like 394 00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:27,520 Speaker 4: I get that sometimes you need to take a breath 395 00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:29,119 Speaker 4: before you say something because you don't want to say 396 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:31,359 Speaker 4: it wrong. You don't want to hurt somebody's feelings. But 397 00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:34,320 Speaker 4: I hate the silent, Like I don't think like you 398 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,680 Speaker 4: should go a day, like you shouldn't go to bed 399 00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:39,480 Speaker 4: without having talked to Something is bothering you, and it's 400 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,600 Speaker 4: bothering you enough like to have that kind of effect 401 00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:43,760 Speaker 4: that you just want to shut down. And that's especially 402 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:45,560 Speaker 4: a time when you need to do so. I think, 403 00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,080 Speaker 4: you know, being silent about stuff and holding a grudge 404 00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:54,520 Speaker 4: and not talking it through, is it just smolders and it. 405 00:17:54,119 --> 00:17:56,560 Speaker 2: Never leads to resentment. Yeah, all of that stuff. 406 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:02,520 Speaker 1: Do you all have to make an effort to keep 407 00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:06,560 Speaker 1: the spark alive, especially knowing that you don't live together, 408 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:10,200 Speaker 1: Do you have to think about it and make that effort. 409 00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,719 Speaker 4: I think just doing long distance you have to make 410 00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 4: an effort. So I think it's as simple as making 411 00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:18,560 Speaker 4: sure we are together. Once we're together, the spark's fine. 412 00:18:18,760 --> 00:18:21,440 Speaker 4: It's just the logistics of living, you know, half a 413 00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:23,840 Speaker 4: country apart. Is a little harder, and he you know, 414 00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:26,680 Speaker 4: he's running a business. He's busy, so like I need 415 00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:28,960 Speaker 4: to go to him maybe more than he comes to me. 416 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:31,399 Speaker 4: Or it's just a little harder, Like his is not 417 00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:34,240 Speaker 4: a business where you can really work remotely, so he 418 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,920 Speaker 4: needs to be in Kansas, and when he's not there, 419 00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:39,480 Speaker 4: he's worried about what's going on back at work. 420 00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,720 Speaker 5: Abe. I will tell you it's an old cliche, but 421 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:47,399 Speaker 5: love languages I think are very important, especially as people 422 00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:49,240 Speaker 5: mature and they go through life and they find out 423 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:51,840 Speaker 5: what's important. And Joan and I we've worked on this 424 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:55,040 Speaker 5: because I like touch. I do just for putting your 425 00:18:55,040 --> 00:18:57,320 Speaker 5: hand on my leg or my back or holding my 426 00:18:57,480 --> 00:19:00,520 Speaker 5: hand makes me feel so much better about the really relationship. 427 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,720 Speaker 5: So those are things that we work on and Jones 428 00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:04,280 Speaker 5: really made an effort on that. 429 00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,480 Speaker 4: It doesn't come naturally to me. I'm not like a 430 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:11,359 Speaker 4: touchy feely person. And so I remember we were just engaged. 431 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,879 Speaker 4: We were finally out in public and we were walking 432 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:15,920 Speaker 4: down the streets in New York and he held my hand. 433 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:17,960 Speaker 4: I was like, what are you doing? Like I don't 434 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,879 Speaker 4: hold hands. It's just weird and foreign to me. And 435 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,440 Speaker 4: I remember he was at my house and he said 436 00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:26,280 Speaker 4: to my daughter, what do you do? He said, you know, 437 00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:28,080 Speaker 4: what do you do when Noah like reaches out and 438 00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:29,560 Speaker 4: hold your hands? She's like, I'd hit him. 439 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:35,920 Speaker 3: So have you adjusted to that now? And you have 440 00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:37,240 Speaker 3: more comfortable holding hands? 441 00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:39,720 Speaker 4: And I am definitely more comfort yeah, yeh, yeah, yeah, 442 00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:41,360 Speaker 4: but I do have to think about it sometimes, like, wow, 443 00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:43,680 Speaker 4: you know, I know that it makes him feel good, 444 00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:46,520 Speaker 4: So I do it. And it's becoming more and more 445 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:48,919 Speaker 4: natural to me by forcing myself to do it. And 446 00:19:48,960 --> 00:19:52,000 Speaker 4: it's completely on me. It's my weird thing. So I 447 00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:52,679 Speaker 4: get it all right. 448 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:56,120 Speaker 3: Last couple of things here and Chuck, this was one 449 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:58,320 Speaker 3: from earlier that we kind of skipped over. We know 450 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,200 Speaker 3: you all are long distance, but give us an idea. 451 00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,280 Speaker 3: What is the longest amount of time that you all 452 00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:07,680 Speaker 3: have had to spend a part in your relationship? 453 00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:11,280 Speaker 5: Three weeks? Three weeks and then like we were in 454 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:13,479 Speaker 5: New York the next weekend, I came to see some 455 00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:15,359 Speaker 5: friends in Maryland and went to see Joan on the 456 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,960 Speaker 5: second half of the weekend. We're going We've had a 457 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 5: couple of times that have been three weeks, and this 458 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,880 Speaker 5: is one. But we're going to be all together all 459 00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:25,239 Speaker 5: next week. So we don't live together, but we are 460 00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:30,919 Speaker 5: extremely busy people, and Jon's got some bachelorettes, some baby 461 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,840 Speaker 5: showers and things like that that are coming up, and 462 00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:37,440 Speaker 5: so we probably won't see each other for a couple 463 00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:40,520 Speaker 5: of weeks there, but we've had it's just been incredible 464 00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:42,439 Speaker 5: the amount of time we've been able to spend together, 465 00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,080 Speaker 5: and we've got to do some really fun stuff. And 466 00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:47,920 Speaker 5: that's you know, is it a relationship? You know from 467 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,439 Speaker 5: the fact is if you're always vacation and doing stuff, 468 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:54,440 Speaker 5: it is because we're adults. We like talking to each 469 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:57,240 Speaker 5: other and we have to interact a little business in 470 00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:00,960 Speaker 5: that too, and that sure makes you figure out the relationship. 471 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that's true. I mean we most of our 472 00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:06,879 Speaker 4: interactions when we're together, we're doing something really fun. Like 473 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,960 Speaker 4: we've been with you guys before, Like last year we 474 00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:12,080 Speaker 4: were at jingle Ball and like it's we're usually doing 475 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,200 Speaker 4: like something really really fun. It's a great way to live. 476 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,760 Speaker 4: And I got to say, like as when I was 477 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:19,800 Speaker 4: married to my late husband, like you planned for this 478 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:21,880 Speaker 4: point in your life. You know, you work really hard, 479 00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:25,040 Speaker 4: you raise your kids, you you know, stow away some 480 00:21:25,119 --> 00:21:28,240 Speaker 4: income so you can live comfortably and then you get 481 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:30,280 Speaker 4: to be this like golden part of your life and 482 00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,800 Speaker 4: you need a partner and I lost mine, he lost his, 483 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:35,720 Speaker 4: and we found each other. So it's just like it's 484 00:21:35,760 --> 00:21:38,280 Speaker 4: what you planned for and just kind of worked out 485 00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:40,080 Speaker 4: in a weird way for us, but we found each 486 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:42,040 Speaker 4: other and we get to live like this cool thing. 487 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:42,240 Speaker 1: Now. 488 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:44,440 Speaker 2: That is so beautiful. 489 00:21:45,960 --> 00:21:48,119 Speaker 1: People look at you, especially when you get later in 490 00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:50,560 Speaker 1: life and you're looking for that second chance, right sometimes 491 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,960 Speaker 1: maybe a third chance, and they want to have what 492 00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:55,919 Speaker 1: you all have found. What would you say is the 493 00:21:56,080 --> 00:22:00,119 Speaker 1: key to your relationship success between the two of you? 494 00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,560 Speaker 5: I think respecting the other person. 495 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, so true. I was thinking, like wanting similar things 496 00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:12,159 Speaker 4: out of this part of your life. Travel, if you know, 497 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:15,520 Speaker 4: whatever you want. We are very similar. You know, we 498 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:17,280 Speaker 4: want to go out and have fun, but we also 499 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,800 Speaker 4: get that we have responsibilities and we respect each other, 500 00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:21,480 Speaker 4: like I know he has to work, he knows I 501 00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,080 Speaker 4: have to be you know with my family here. So 502 00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:25,520 Speaker 4: we're very respectful of each other. But we're still like 503 00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 4: really interested in like living this second part or life. 504 00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:32,040 Speaker 3: And the second part of life. I guess you will 505 00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:36,040 Speaker 3: always get asked but when is the next big thing 506 00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,320 Speaker 3: for you guys? I know you talked about moving in 507 00:22:38,359 --> 00:22:40,600 Speaker 3: together at some point, you talk, we got all kinds 508 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,199 Speaker 3: of stuff. What are the next headlines we're going to 509 00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:45,919 Speaker 3: see from about you too? And the next step you 510 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,399 Speaker 3: take in your relationship? Go ahead? 511 00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:49,000 Speaker 4: Do you answer it? 512 00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:54,920 Speaker 5: He always Joe has a son getting married. That's there 513 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:00,280 Speaker 5: and Amy, that's one of the things that we that 514 00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:02,880 Speaker 5: we've had to deal with. But Joanes had a son 515 00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:05,520 Speaker 5: that got married last year and has another one getting 516 00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:08,160 Speaker 5: married this year, and it's we're adults and we don't 517 00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,720 Speaker 5: want to compete with that. And Joan is just so 518 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,680 Speaker 5: involved with her family, with the grandkids and all that 519 00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:16,159 Speaker 5: she wants to make that the biggest time for them. 520 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:17,399 Speaker 2: It's very sweet. 521 00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:19,879 Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't want to take any focus off of them. 522 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:21,600 Speaker 4: I mean this, the light has been on us a 523 00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:23,159 Speaker 4: long time. I don't we don't need to be in 524 00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,679 Speaker 4: the limelight at all. And I want like their special 525 00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:28,520 Speaker 4: time to be their special time. So I'm not talking wedding. 526 00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:31,520 Speaker 4: So maybe twenty twenty seven, who knows, but certainly not 527 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:32,280 Speaker 4: twenty twenty six. 528 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,280 Speaker 3: We respect that and we get that it's fun being engaged. 529 00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:37,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that, right right, last, just 530 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,040 Speaker 1: even the word fiance. It's fun to say, that's so 531 00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:41,080 Speaker 1: much better, doesn't it? Right? 532 00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:42,879 Speaker 4: Like I would always we talked about this. 533 00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:45,000 Speaker 1: We would struggle when we were dating, you know, like 534 00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:48,040 Speaker 1: people you would have to reference, like, well, my my boyfriend. 535 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:50,960 Speaker 2: In my fifties, I have a boyfriend friends. 536 00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:54,159 Speaker 4: So it's so fun to say I'm steady. 537 00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,880 Speaker 2: My fiance's fun. 538 00:23:57,920 --> 00:23:58,640 Speaker 4: I'm very elegant. 539 00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:02,520 Speaker 3: We go together. We look forward to seeing you in 540 00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:05,480 Speaker 3: the flesh man, not on the screen the next time. 541 00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:08,200 Speaker 3: But it's seeing you man real quick. 542 00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:09,600 Speaker 5: Amy, Can I tell you a quick story? 543 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:09,960 Speaker 1: Yes? 544 00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:13,560 Speaker 5: So was it, honey? When it was? It was the 545 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,920 Speaker 5: jingle Ball that we were at correct. 546 00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,720 Speaker 4: Out in La Yeah, like a like a year ago. 547 00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:23,080 Speaker 5: And I watched very little TV, very very little, I 548 00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:26,200 Speaker 5: mean hardly any at all. And I remember the bar 549 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:28,720 Speaker 5: and hotel and I see this guy and I like 550 00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:31,439 Speaker 5: to look at guys that are in shape, and I 551 00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:33,399 Speaker 5: see this guy that said shape and I see this 552 00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:35,240 Speaker 5: good looking guy and he standing there and I go, 553 00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,560 Speaker 5: I know you from somewhere, and that was your fiance, 554 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,399 Speaker 5: And I was like, he is much better. 555 00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,240 Speaker 3: We had a good time that lotty my daughter was 556 00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:53,600 Speaker 3: with me at the time. Yes, correct, So this is 557 00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:55,760 Speaker 3: special to us. We've been through our hell, you all 558 00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,439 Speaker 3: go through your hell. But to get to know you 559 00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:01,720 Speaker 3: all and to have stories and memories and actually stories 560 00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:03,760 Speaker 3: to tell like you just just did, Chalk is not 561 00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:07,920 Speaker 3: lost on us. Joan Chalk seriously that it's special to 562 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,119 Speaker 3: us to be able to have these conversations and to 563 00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:11,840 Speaker 3: get to know you all and to have you all 564 00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:13,960 Speaker 3: in our lives, given this is not where we thought 565 00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,159 Speaker 3: our lives would be, but we love exactly where we 566 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:17,560 Speaker 3: are and you all are a part of that and 567 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,080 Speaker 3: it's not lost on us. So thank you both. 568 00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:20,760 Speaker 4: We feel the same way. Thank you for having us