1 00:00:00,720 --> 00:00:02,280 Speaker 1: Kutbooms. 2 00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:05,400 Speaker 2: If you thought four hours a day, twelve hundred minutes 3 00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 2: a week was enough, think again. He's the last remnants 4 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 2: of the Old Republic, a soul fashion of fairness. He 5 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:15,520 Speaker 2: treats crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the 6 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:19,599 Speaker 2: rich pill poppers in the penthouse. Wow to Clearinghouse of 7 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:23,520 Speaker 2: hot takes, break free for something special. The Fifth Hour 8 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:29,440 Speaker 2: with Ben Maller starts right now. 9 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:33,800 Speaker 1: In the air everywhere. The Fifth Hour with Me, Ben 10 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:37,680 Speaker 1: Maler and Danny g Radio. The final day of the 11 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:42,760 Speaker 1: month of January. We will flip the calendar on Sunday 12 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,519 Speaker 1: to February first, and a week from tomorrow it is 13 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:49,199 Speaker 1: odd Super Bowl sixty. Now try not to talk too 14 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:52,280 Speaker 1: much sports on this podcast. It's the Fifth Hour Parties. 15 00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,440 Speaker 1: By the way, Danny not with us again. Hopefully he'll 16 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:57,480 Speaker 1: be with us tomorrow. I don't know. But anyway, so 17 00:00:57,640 --> 00:01:00,800 Speaker 1: today there's a lot of story to caught my attention. 18 00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: I didn't do the show overnight obviously, because that was 19 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,920 Speaker 1: the day we were done. We did the podcast yesterday. 20 00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:10,640 Speaker 1: There's some decent stuff in the NFL that you just 21 00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:15,440 Speaker 1: roll your eyes at. For example, Todd munkin the monk Man, 22 00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:19,000 Speaker 1: the coach of the Cleveland Browns now who is just 23 00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:23,759 Speaker 1: hired this week, who claimed that the Baltimore Ravens tried 24 00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:25,920 Speaker 1: to draft Shouldher Sanders, like he was trying to suck 25 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,680 Speaker 1: up to Shudhur Sanders. I don't know if you saw 26 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:30,720 Speaker 1: this or not, tried to suck up to him, and 27 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 1: then he claimed that they tried to draft him. Shudhur 28 00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:38,800 Speaker 1: Sanders was drafted in the middle actually closer to the 29 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: end of the draft, Like when were they planning on 30 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,759 Speaker 1: drafting him? He was the one hundred and forty fourth 31 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:48,680 Speaker 1: overall pick in the fifth round the draft's only seven rounds, 32 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,600 Speaker 1: Like were they well six rounds? Like what are they 33 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 1: waiting for they got? I mean, it's ridiculous. So I 34 00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,200 Speaker 1: saw that that was amusing and I got a lot 35 00:01:58,200 --> 00:01:59,800 Speaker 1: of him. But by the way, this podcast, we're gonna 36 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:03,360 Speaker 1: have not a mensa and hum baby, not a mensa 37 00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:06,400 Speaker 1: and humbaby baby. So I got several emails people upset 38 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:09,480 Speaker 1: that I was not on the show last night, which 39 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:12,920 Speaker 1: always I'm always surprised by this because it's not that 40 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:14,960 Speaker 1: they wanted to hear the show. They just wanted to 41 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 1: hear a monologue about the Vikings. So based on the feedback, 42 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,960 Speaker 1: I'm going to do an emergency mal monologue right now 43 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:25,000 Speaker 1: here on the Fifth Hour podcast because a number of 44 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 1: my brothers and sisters that live in the great state 45 00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 1: of Minnesota in the Greater Minneapolis area were upset because 46 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:36,680 Speaker 1: the Vikings did something that was very bizarre for late January. 47 00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:39,320 Speaker 1: I haven't you heard about it? Or maybe not, perhaps 48 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,640 Speaker 1: you were not paying attention. So the Vikings handed a 49 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:48,040 Speaker 1: box to their GM, Quazy adopha mensa. They said, all right, crazy, here, 50 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:49,880 Speaker 1: I want you to have this box. What's in the box? 51 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:52,080 Speaker 1: All right? So we opened the box and there was 52 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:54,280 Speaker 1: there was something pink in there and it appeared to 53 00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 1: be a slip. So he was given a pink slip. 54 00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:03,000 Speaker 1: That's right. The Vikings they whacked their general manager as 55 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:06,679 Speaker 1: he spent the week scouting college players for the upcoming 56 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:11,760 Speaker 1: NFL Draft. And the coaching carousel is about done, right 57 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:15,040 Speaker 1: about done. The Raiders and the Cardinals were the last 58 00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:17,519 Speaker 1: couple of teams. The Raiders have their choice. They're just 59 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 1: waiting for Seattle to be eliminated in the Super Bowl 60 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,800 Speaker 1: in the higher of their coach. But anyway, so the 61 00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:26,080 Speaker 1: Vikings got rid of this guy Quasya doo fa men's 62 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 1: of the GM. He's gone booted, kicked out, showing the 63 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: door however you want to say it. And as the 64 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,680 Speaker 1: only one apparently that has my brain plugged in, you 65 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:39,480 Speaker 1: demand a Mallard monologue, And of course I'm still a 66 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:44,440 Speaker 1: little foggy here. I will try to explain what happened 67 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:46,800 Speaker 1: in Minnesota. I have a theory on this. I have 68 00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:49,360 Speaker 1: a theory on what happened with the Minnesota football team. 69 00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:51,480 Speaker 1: So it's a good jumping off point. Let us discuss 70 00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:56,000 Speaker 1: the question why. We'll get to the why. Why did 71 00:03:56,000 --> 00:04:00,800 Speaker 1: the Vikings randomly poll as the GM quasy Dolpha mensa. 72 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:04,200 Speaker 1: And this is just a week before a little over 73 00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 1: a week before the Super Bowl and a long time 74 00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:09,320 Speaker 1: after the season ended, right pretty much a month after 75 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 1: the season ended. So I've got peer one, Pigley Wiggly, 76 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:17,440 Speaker 1: and we'll put those together on the mini malle monologue. 77 00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:22,160 Speaker 1: We're gonna make white chocolate Macadamian nut cookies. White chocolate 78 00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:26,160 Speaker 1: Macadamian nut cookies. What we're gonna make so a the 79 00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:30,040 Speaker 1: answer is why to why? The answer to why, it's 80 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:33,280 Speaker 1: very simple to an Oukham's Razors situation. The simplest answer 81 00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:38,960 Speaker 1: is the easiest answer and the right answer, because ownership panicked. 82 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:43,240 Speaker 1: They panicked. Now, I'm not saying that Quzy adolpha mensa. 83 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:45,279 Speaker 1: The GM there, this guy was doing a good job. 84 00:04:45,279 --> 00:04:48,039 Speaker 1: I'm not saying that. I'm saying the normal protocol is, 85 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:49,680 Speaker 1: if you're gonna get rid of the GM, you do 86 00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:52,119 Speaker 1: it in the regular season. Late in the regular season, 87 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:56,320 Speaker 1: you do it right after the last game. Therefore, you 88 00:04:56,440 --> 00:04:58,400 Speaker 1: have your choice of who you want to bring in 89 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:02,240 Speaker 1: as the next A bunch of gms have been hired, 90 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:04,960 Speaker 1: and the music's pretty much done on the game of 91 00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:09,280 Speaker 1: musical charity. So the theory is the owner the will 92 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:12,479 Speaker 1: family there in Minnesota, they panic full stop. And this 93 00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:16,280 Speaker 1: is not some kind of mystery novel. You do not 94 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:19,800 Speaker 1: even need to activate the MiB, the Mather Investigative Bureau. 95 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 1: This is fear with a pulse. Minnesota's ownership group has 96 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:29,520 Speaker 1: been diagnosed here with a bad case of sd DS. 97 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:33,599 Speaker 1: All right, what is that? What is sd DS? That 98 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:38,120 Speaker 1: is Sam Donald's derangement syndrome. Is what it is? Sam 99 00:05:38,160 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: Donald arrangementercentro. To rephrase this, the internet was howling at 100 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:48,560 Speaker 1: the moon. The purple people. Eater's crowd turned into a 101 00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:54,200 Speaker 1: barber shop quartet, and they were humming the chili's jingle, 102 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:57,599 Speaker 1: I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back, 103 00:05:57,640 --> 00:05:59,880 Speaker 1: baby back. That's where they were humming, I want my 104 00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:03,640 Speaker 1: baby back, baby back, baby back. Instead of ribs, they 105 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:08,880 Speaker 1: wanted their quarterback and ownership blinked. That's it, period, Stop, 106 00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:12,039 Speaker 1: it's what. Now. Seattle is in the super Bowl. I 107 00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:15,360 Speaker 1: did see their supposedly for sale after the Super Bowl. 108 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:17,120 Speaker 1: So if you want to put a couple of shekels together, 109 00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:19,680 Speaker 1: we can buy the Seahawks. But anyway, how great would 110 00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:23,400 Speaker 1: that be? How upset would no Stridinus be and JJ 111 00:06:23,560 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 1: and Httin and crying Craig and blind emmet the Seahawk 112 00:06:26,839 --> 00:06:28,919 Speaker 1: fan if I just went down and bought the Seahawks. 113 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,839 Speaker 1: Of course that could happen. If I went on a 114 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:35,600 Speaker 1: cross country bank robbery spree for the next fifty years, 115 00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:38,239 Speaker 1: I could come up with enough money. Like the Chiefs 116 00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:41,719 Speaker 1: superfan is currently locked up in the Gray Bar Hotel. Anyway, 117 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,960 Speaker 1: so Seattle's in the Super Bowl. Suddenly the Vikings think 118 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:49,760 Speaker 1: they let the one go, the one that got Away's 119 00:06:49,760 --> 00:06:54,240 Speaker 1: slip right through their fingers, which is absurd on just 120 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:57,920 Speaker 1: about every level. It's absurd. Here's why. If you think 121 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:01,920 Speaker 1: Sam Darnold is the reason that the Seattle Seahawks are 122 00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 1: in the super Bowl, you don't know ball. You don't 123 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:12,240 Speaker 1: You're incriminating yourself. That is not analysis, That is just superstition. 124 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:17,200 Speaker 1: Have you not been paying attention? That's like lighting candles 125 00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:19,760 Speaker 1: and blaming the furniture, Like, what are you doing? Dumping 126 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 1: the general manage Again, this guy didn't do a great job. Fine, 127 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:24,520 Speaker 1: I get it. He didn't really do well. The draft 128 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:27,120 Speaker 1: has not been good. But getting rid of the GM 129 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:32,960 Speaker 1: was a sacrifice to the angry mob with the pitchforks 130 00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:36,120 Speaker 1: and the torches and all that. Someone had to be 131 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:40,280 Speaker 1: tossed into the volcano, the metaphorical volcano, so the noise 132 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:45,160 Speaker 1: would stop and the football gods. More importantly, these social 133 00:07:45,240 --> 00:07:49,360 Speaker 1: media matrix people demand it a pound of flesh, and 134 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:52,160 Speaker 1: it just happened. The short straw was taken by the 135 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:56,280 Speaker 1: GM there quasi adolpha mensa. He was the guy, the 136 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:59,760 Speaker 1: GM there who took it. He was convenient haunted by 137 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:04,600 Speaker 1: things that go bumpity bump in the night, like talk radio, 138 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:09,320 Speaker 1: social media, the echo chamber, Watch out for the echo chamber. 139 00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,440 Speaker 1: Now what about Peer one. I'm not talking about Peer 140 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:15,360 Speaker 1: one imports. I'm talking about Peer one exports. That's the 141 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:19,480 Speaker 1: issue here right out. You go see you later if 142 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: you act like an adult on this one. And I 143 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:25,679 Speaker 1: have an unpopular opinion, but I'm gonna stick to my opinion. 144 00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:28,640 Speaker 1: I'm gonna die on this take on this mountain. So 145 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:33,440 Speaker 1: letting Sam Donald walk was not the problem. It was not. 146 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:35,560 Speaker 1: If you look at what Sam Donald did this year 147 00:08:35,559 --> 00:08:39,080 Speaker 1: in Seattle, I'm reasonable. Don't shake your head, no, no, 148 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:42,160 Speaker 1: don't shake your head. No. I'm a reasonable observer. Sam 149 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:46,640 Speaker 1: Donald was by Sam Donald, measuring him by Sam Donald. 150 00:08:46,679 --> 00:08:50,199 Speaker 1: He was solid. He wasn't spectacular. This was not one 151 00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:54,320 Speaker 1: of the great performances. He wasn't as good as Matthew 152 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 1: Stafford or Drake may or someone like that. He wasn't 153 00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:02,080 Speaker 1: And to circle back to our friend Roberto the bus 154 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:06,480 Speaker 1: driver using bus driver lingo, Sam Donald was not the 155 00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:10,160 Speaker 1: bus driver for the Seahawks. He was a bus writer. 156 00:09:10,880 --> 00:09:12,600 Speaker 1: He was the one paying the fare in the back 157 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:15,679 Speaker 1: of the bus. The numbers are right there. He had 158 00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:19,520 Speaker 1: fourteen interceptions, near the bottom of the league second half 159 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:23,120 Speaker 1: of the season. It was the ninety nine, meaning nine 160 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:26,199 Speaker 1: picks and nine touchdowns. That is a coin flip. And 161 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:30,120 Speaker 1: it's got a drinking problem. And the trend line matters. 162 00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,240 Speaker 1: It does matter, Sam Donald. For all these people up 163 00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:36,520 Speaker 1: in arms, Oh my god, his touchdowns year to year, 164 00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:39,760 Speaker 1: if you go side by side from Minnesota Seattle, his 165 00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:44,920 Speaker 1: touchdowns were down almost thirty percent from his season starting 166 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:51,520 Speaker 1: in the Twin Cities. The interceptions were up. Inconsistency still 167 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:55,439 Speaker 1: ravages Sam Donald. It's like a rash that goes away 168 00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:57,480 Speaker 1: and comes back. You know, It's like you have a 169 00:09:57,559 --> 00:10:01,520 Speaker 1: gluten allergy and it comes back. This is who he is, 170 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 1: Sam Donald. Will win a bunch of games for you 171 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:07,440 Speaker 1: in a month or two and then go out and 172 00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,319 Speaker 1: in the Super Bowl a week from him tomorrow, he'll 173 00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:13,760 Speaker 1: ride the vombit comment. That's it, So spare me the 174 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:18,520 Speaker 1: pearl clutching right the GM in this case, Uh, you know, 175 00:10:18,679 --> 00:10:24,520 Speaker 1: this guy gets absolutely vaporized. Bye bye, Adolpha Mansa get 176 00:10:24,559 --> 00:10:27,720 Speaker 1: out of here. So he gets vaporized. He's out. He's 177 00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:31,920 Speaker 1: the guy to take the hit on this. And I 178 00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:37,360 Speaker 1: guess again this happens that that's how this works. Fine, 179 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:41,199 Speaker 1: but it wasn't accountability. It was appeasement. This was made 180 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:48,640 Speaker 1: for appeasement. Ownership heard the cacophony of shaky wisdom, mistook 181 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:51,880 Speaker 1: mistook that for wisdom, that just the noise and all that, 182 00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:58,120 Speaker 1: And so they confused the pressure the banging on pots 183 00:10:58,160 --> 00:11:02,719 Speaker 1: and pans as legitimate proof. And now they've gotten neither right, 184 00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:07,240 Speaker 1: poltergeist peer pressure. When you don't know where the noise 185 00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:09,760 Speaker 1: is coming from, what do you do? You start breaking 186 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:13,440 Speaker 1: your own stuff? Like I think the noise is coming 187 00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:16,880 Speaker 1: from the sofa. Let me pull all the cushions off 188 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:19,280 Speaker 1: the sofa and I'm gonna start fuxing around with it. 189 00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:22,880 Speaker 1: Now I think it's coming from the dishwasher, So why 190 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:25,160 Speaker 1: don't I take everything out of the dishwasher, all the 191 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:27,800 Speaker 1: trays and all that, and I'm gonna take my screwdriver 192 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,960 Speaker 1: and kind of go around now, Okay, Page two. So 193 00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:35,320 Speaker 1: the other question on this story, and I'll be brief. 194 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,640 Speaker 1: This is a mini Mallor monologue, and there's some other 195 00:11:37,679 --> 00:11:40,440 Speaker 1: things I want to talk about the question that I 196 00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:43,120 Speaker 1: had on my mind. Though, if Sam Donald's departure, we 197 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:46,920 Speaker 1: can all agree knowledgeable people wasn't the main issue for 198 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:53,480 Speaker 1: the Vikings. What was meaning that that was not the crime. 199 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:58,200 Speaker 1: That's like jaywalking. They took a guy that had been 200 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:02,640 Speaker 1: a big spicy meat ball of Pooh and he played 201 00:12:02,679 --> 00:12:05,360 Speaker 1: one year, played Okay, fell apart at the end. You 202 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 1: let him go. That's fine. The real issue I think 203 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:14,400 Speaker 1: we can agree is that they put in the grocery 204 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:21,080 Speaker 1: cart afterwards, meaning these are pigly wiggly problems. What is 205 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:24,000 Speaker 1: a pigly wiggly problem or the Pickli Wiggily is a 206 00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:28,080 Speaker 1: great Southern grocery chain which is by far the greatest 207 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:32,600 Speaker 1: named store for shopping for food I've ever come across 208 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:35,319 Speaker 1: in my time on this planet, the Pigley Wiggily. But 209 00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:39,520 Speaker 1: I'm getting to a picky wiggly problem is picking groceries. 210 00:12:40,280 --> 00:12:42,920 Speaker 1: That's what this is. That's what all of this is. 211 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:48,840 Speaker 1: The Vikings did not starve. They didn't become improverished because 212 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:54,120 Speaker 1: Sam Donald left. They starved because they bought the wrong meat. 213 00:12:54,679 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 1: They did. Where's the beef? Well, what't Eddy? This is 214 00:12:59,000 --> 00:13:02,480 Speaker 1: shopping malpre practice. That's the issue. And for those of 215 00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 1: you that are a little slow because it's the weekend 216 00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:07,720 Speaker 1: and you're in the back of the room there and 217 00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:11,760 Speaker 1: you're wearing your noise canceling headphones, letting Sam Donold walk 218 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:15,000 Speaker 1: was fine. We would have done the same thing. The 219 00:13:15,120 --> 00:13:20,680 Speaker 1: mistake is this. You thought you were buying Kobe beef 220 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:25,840 Speaker 1: and you came home, you took the bag, you took 221 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:28,840 Speaker 1: the beef out of the bag, and you said, where's 222 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:31,160 Speaker 1: the beef? And there was no Kobe beef. It was 223 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:37,120 Speaker 1: mince meat pie a Frankenstein food. You wanted Kobe beef, 224 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,760 Speaker 1: you got mince meat, the apples, the dried fruit, the 225 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:43,400 Speaker 1: almond paste, the booze, nothing that actually fills you up, 226 00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,880 Speaker 1: and nothing you look forward eating. No one's ever woken 227 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,240 Speaker 1: up and said, I really want some of that that 228 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:51,440 Speaker 1: mince meat today. That would really make me happy. I 229 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,680 Speaker 1: really want that. No one ever says that. And the 230 00:13:53,720 --> 00:13:57,360 Speaker 1: butcher who made the call was crazy. This guy at 231 00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:01,319 Speaker 1: Dolphamenza the GM there, he looked at the display case 232 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:05,760 Speaker 1: and said, that's the one right there, premium, I'd like that. 233 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:08,400 Speaker 1: He pointed at it, and then he took it and 234 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:10,960 Speaker 1: they put some plastic grap on it, and then he 235 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:14,800 Speaker 1: put it in his back. Wrong label, wrong cut, wrong century, 236 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:20,600 Speaker 1: check the receipt. The Vikings hitched their purple wagon to 237 00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:26,600 Speaker 1: JJ McCarthy, a Michigan man, a Michigan man who should 238 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:30,560 Speaker 1: have stayed at Michigan and coached at Michigan. Three years 239 00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:33,320 Speaker 1: into his NFL. I remember first year he redshirted because 240 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:36,640 Speaker 1: he was hurt. Second year, this past year he played. 241 00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:41,480 Speaker 1: And here we are sitting after two years and where 242 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:45,920 Speaker 1: are we at? So year three is upcoming and he 243 00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:50,480 Speaker 1: is still the UI guy. Soft center, need refrigeration and 244 00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:54,720 Speaker 1: not ready to serve. Will give you a massive case 245 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:59,960 Speaker 1: of die die diarrhea. That is not a franchise quarterback. 246 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:03,360 Speaker 1: That is a dessert you leave out for too long, 247 00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:06,160 Speaker 1: is what that is. And when you take a step back, 248 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:11,040 Speaker 1: it does fit the Vikings mindset. My entire life has 249 00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:14,440 Speaker 1: been good enough is good enough? Now I have no 250 00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:15,680 Speaker 1: skin in the game. We got a lot of friends 251 00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:17,720 Speaker 1: in Minnesota. You guys have been great. You love the show. 252 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:21,200 Speaker 1: I had a wonderful time at the Mermaid when we 253 00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:26,840 Speaker 1: got together with Eke and Roseville, Minnesota and hollering James 254 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:30,840 Speaker 1: and all the al all the all the guys and 255 00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:32,960 Speaker 1: those where all the good delis are all you guys 256 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:36,400 Speaker 1: that showed. It was wonderful. And again thanks to our 257 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:40,720 Speaker 1: friend spin Cycle Regina for making that happen. So the 258 00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:45,240 Speaker 1: Vikings franchises like, well, they're never really that bad. They're 259 00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:49,400 Speaker 1: just never consistently that good. It's not excellence, it's not domination. 260 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:55,960 Speaker 1: It's just adequate. It's if the government was a football team, 261 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:59,200 Speaker 1: they'd be the Minnesota Vikings. It's government work football. It 262 00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:04,920 Speaker 1: meets the minimal's standard. It passes inspection. And I go 263 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,440 Speaker 1: back to that word adequate because I feel like that's 264 00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,600 Speaker 1: that's the word, you know. Don't go above and beyond 265 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:16,920 Speaker 1: the call of duty. Just do the bare minimum. Nothing inspiring, 266 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:21,760 Speaker 1: nothing bold, just a shrug with shoulder pads. And it 267 00:16:21,880 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 1: is a cultural thing, right the Twin Cities. They love 268 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:28,720 Speaker 1: play Minnesota and Ice. Right, Minnesota and Ice. One of 269 00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:33,080 Speaker 1: the most amazing things I've be into was it's actually 270 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:37,040 Speaker 1: in Vegas, but it was four in the morning during 271 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:41,840 Speaker 1: the NFL regular season, and the in the Morning show 272 00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:47,280 Speaker 1: from Kfan was there broadcasting at four in the morning, 273 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,160 Speaker 1: or I think they started then, might have been earlier. 274 00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 1: So I walk in. They invited me to come hang 275 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:57,960 Speaker 1: out with them. I walk in and it was insane. 276 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:01,640 Speaker 1: It was bonkers. There's meat, sauce and all the boys 277 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,280 Speaker 1: on the stage and there were hundreds of people at 278 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:07,840 Speaker 1: four in the morning. All Minnesotans who were there to 279 00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:11,199 Speaker 1: watch the morning show was it was great. So it 280 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:13,760 Speaker 1: was very nice. Right, you don't want to offend anyone, 281 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,280 Speaker 1: you know, swing too hard. If you don't swing too hard, 282 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,880 Speaker 1: you don't miss big. You don't just line up and 283 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,160 Speaker 1: you clap a little bit and hope the other team 284 00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:25,960 Speaker 1: screws up first. And that's that and just how you 285 00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:31,399 Speaker 1: end up with a marinate of mediocrity. But you have optimism. 286 00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 1: So the foundation was already cracked, and you don't again, 287 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,720 Speaker 1: you don't blame the grocery store for what you cook. 288 00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:40,800 Speaker 1: You blame the person that did the shopping and cook 289 00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:45,119 Speaker 1: the meal. And right now the kitchen smells smells like leftovers, 290 00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:48,720 Speaker 1: I would say. So the kill shot would be the 291 00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,159 Speaker 1: story that came out this week, which was likely leaked 292 00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:53,960 Speaker 1: more likely than not by a dosa mensa dopha mensa. 293 00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 1: The GM there the former GM that the Vikings were 294 00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:04,639 Speaker 1: looking at the quarterback duo of Anthony Richardson and Mac Jones, 295 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,280 Speaker 1: which is like, well, wait a minute, what do you 296 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:07,960 Speaker 1: do We have our guy, you said he was our guy. 297 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:08,480 Speaker 1: What are you doing? 298 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:14,280 Speaker 3: Meanwhile turning the page, Hum baby humbaby now I am 299 00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:18,679 Speaker 3: about to do something on this fifth hour podcast in 300 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:21,880 Speaker 3: Polite Society that earns you side eye. 301 00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:23,439 Speaker 2: And a. 302 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:32,280 Speaker 1: Sigh and a question. Who hurts you? Right? Who hurts you? 303 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:34,360 Speaker 1: You want to take a guess what I'm talking about here. 304 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:37,400 Speaker 1: It's a bit of a riddle. I see Alf knows. 305 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:40,000 Speaker 1: Alf knows when I say a homebaby, Alf knows right away. 306 00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:41,960 Speaker 1: I don't know about Ferg Dog. I don't know about 307 00:18:41,960 --> 00:18:48,080 Speaker 1: Ferg Dog. Not sure about him. So reveal answers, Reveal answers. 308 00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:56,720 Speaker 1: I am standing, and I'm clapping for lawyers who goofed. 309 00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:58,920 Speaker 1: I've got to know now, I'm not talking about these 310 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:02,960 Speaker 1: billboard lawyers. I would venture I guess that there is 311 00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:07,480 Speaker 1: no one, no one who lives in a city that 312 00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,399 Speaker 1: has more billboard lawyers than Los Angeles. I'm just pointing 313 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,960 Speaker 1: that out. So, but I am clapping for these attorneys. 314 00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:15,919 Speaker 1: And I know lawyers are usually the people that you 315 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:18,680 Speaker 1: tolerate the way you tolerate a long rain delay when 316 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:21,840 Speaker 1: you're at a baseball game. It's annoying, it's inevitable because 317 00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:24,919 Speaker 1: you looked at the weather app and somehow it's still 318 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,159 Speaker 1: expensive because you're buying food and all that. But on 319 00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:30,760 Speaker 1: this one. I want to give these these lawyers the 320 00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:34,760 Speaker 1: full Rocky Balboa montage, and let me explain why if 321 00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:39,000 Speaker 1: the allegations are true, the San Francisco Giants, that's a 322 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:42,280 Speaker 1: baseball team, not a good one, did not just sell tickets. 323 00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:46,760 Speaker 1: They sold the illusion of a price and then hit 324 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:50,800 Speaker 1: fans with the old razzle dazzle at the finish line. 325 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:53,680 Speaker 1: So if you know what I'm talking about, you might, 326 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:56,199 Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe not, maybe not. So I saw this, 327 00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:57,720 Speaker 1: so I was going to do a monologue about it 328 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:00,560 Speaker 1: during the week, and I didn't get to it because 329 00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:02,239 Speaker 1: of some other football stuff, and I figured we had 330 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:03,639 Speaker 1: a little time here on a Saturdays, so I did 331 00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:06,960 Speaker 1: want to talk about it. It's a passionate topic of 332 00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:11,679 Speaker 1: conversation for me, So I will spare you all of 333 00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:16,800 Speaker 1: the nitty gritty, right I will just I understand when 334 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:18,800 Speaker 1: when when you hear me say, hey, I like you 335 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:23,639 Speaker 1: know these these lawyers, the reason is because they're fighting 336 00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:28,080 Speaker 1: back against the up charging everyone. As far as the 337 00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:30,679 Speaker 1: everyone does it thing, which some people everyone's doing it, 338 00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:33,359 Speaker 1: don't care. That's not a defense, by the way, that 339 00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:38,800 Speaker 1: is a confession. With better poster. It's like the cheating assstros. 340 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,120 Speaker 1: I just call them assholes. We're on the podcast. They're 341 00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:45,959 Speaker 1: cheating assholes from Houston, right. So those guys that their 342 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,480 Speaker 1: fan base, if you want to call them that. They're like, 343 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:50,280 Speaker 1: oh no, I've in the terrible and all those guys 344 00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:52,560 Speaker 1: are like, oh yeah, yeah, Well everyone was doing it. 345 00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:55,639 Speaker 1: Everyone was doing it. Okay. Well again, it's like getting 346 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:58,120 Speaker 1: pulled over for speeding and say, well, the officers, how 347 00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 1: fast were you going? Well, officer, I was going ninety 348 00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:02,760 Speaker 1: nine miles. Well, you know the speed limit here is 349 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:04,600 Speaker 1: like sixty five. You can't go ninety nine. Well I 350 00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,200 Speaker 1: know that, sir, but I was actually going the flow 351 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,679 Speaker 1: of traffic. Everyone was going to the same speed. So 352 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:11,680 Speaker 1: what are you doing? But they still give you a ticket, 353 00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:14,159 Speaker 1: They give you an expensive ticket. But here's the basic 354 00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:18,640 Speaker 1: setup of this skullduggery, and it's a proposed class action suit. 355 00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:23,600 Speaker 1: It's in federal court that says the giants advertised one 356 00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:30,399 Speaker 1: price and then presto abreka dabra checkout. They added extra 357 00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:37,720 Speaker 1: convenience and processing fees that were not disclosed up front, 358 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,600 Speaker 1: and what the lawsuit calls junk fees because that's what 359 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:43,920 Speaker 1: they are. If this is true, allegedly inflating totals for 360 00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:47,480 Speaker 1: hundreds of thousands of people that bought tickets to watch 361 00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:51,920 Speaker 1: that bad baseball team. Now, the person named the plaintiff 362 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 1: will call him Wand because that's his name. He claims 363 00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:57,400 Speaker 1: that he bought two tickets that were advertised for ten 364 00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:01,720 Speaker 1: dollars each, then watched the toll climb to twenty nine 365 00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:05,760 Speaker 1: dollars after the fees all of a sudden appeared at checkout. 366 00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:09,000 Speaker 1: That is not convenience in my world. That is what's 367 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:14,520 Speaker 1: known as a shakedown with a digital receipt. Congratulations, and 368 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:20,399 Speaker 1: the piece demissons. The masterpiece is because the Internet is 369 00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:24,320 Speaker 1: basically a mall kiosk. That's all it is, right, the Internet. 370 00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:26,719 Speaker 1: They want you to buy stuff or watch porn, that's it. 371 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,840 Speaker 1: And so there's a countdown clock on here. The suit 372 00:22:29,880 --> 00:22:33,440 Speaker 1: alleges that this guy Wan was he felt pressure by 373 00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:38,880 Speaker 1: a timer, limiting the time to review details, enter payment 374 00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:42,960 Speaker 1: info and agree to terms. The classic but wait, there's 375 00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 1: more energy, except instead of a second set of steak knives, 376 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,880 Speaker 1: you get a third line item labeled because we can sucker, 377 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,600 Speaker 1: get that dumb money. Get that dumb money. Baby, you 378 00:22:57,720 --> 00:23:00,159 Speaker 1: gotta do it all right, So get that dumb money anyway. 379 00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:05,960 Speaker 1: So this is where my inner malar cynicism pops up. 380 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,520 Speaker 1: I put on the trench code, I hold the decoder ring. 381 00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:13,880 Speaker 1: The whole trick is psychological. Now I've actually studied this 382 00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:18,119 Speaker 1: over the years. I'm fascinated by the things that people 383 00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:22,520 Speaker 1: do in business to sell products, and people end up 384 00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:25,760 Speaker 1: buying things. They think it's their own decision, but they're 385 00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:30,680 Speaker 1: actually swayed. It's fascinating. When I worked at WEI briefly 386 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:33,120 Speaker 1: in Boston, I did a couple of years fill in 387 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:38,000 Speaker 1: nighttime shows at WI. While working at Fox Sports Radio. 388 00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:40,639 Speaker 1: One of the other talk show hosts also had a 389 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:44,920 Speaker 1: full time job. He was a lollipop salesman. Doesn't that 390 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:48,439 Speaker 1: sound like it's out of a nineteen nineties comedy? A 391 00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:51,240 Speaker 1: guy traveling around as a lollipop salesman. And so I 392 00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:53,359 Speaker 1: talked to him a couple of times about this, and 393 00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:56,720 Speaker 1: he explained to me that the lollipop game, the way 394 00:23:56,760 --> 00:24:00,639 Speaker 1: that it works, is that most of the people that 395 00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:04,680 Speaker 1: buy lollipops didn't want to buy lollipops. They had no intention. 396 00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:08,080 Speaker 1: They went into Target or Walmart or wherever. They didn't 397 00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:15,160 Speaker 1: plan on getting any lollipops. However, it is strategic placement 398 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:18,159 Speaker 1: and they pay money. Was telling me, like, yeah, we've 399 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,720 Speaker 1: deals with all these big box stores and the grocery 400 00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:24,240 Speaker 1: chains like Kroger, and we put the lollipops. We've done 401 00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:27,120 Speaker 1: market research. We know exactly where to put the lollipops 402 00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:30,240 Speaker 1: when the person's putting their groceries on the thing that 403 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:33,960 Speaker 1: where their eyeballs are, where they look, and then we 404 00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:37,639 Speaker 1: know a certain percentage of those people are hungry and 405 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:39,879 Speaker 1: they like lollipops and they haven't had one in a 406 00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:43,080 Speaker 1: long time, and so they'll buy the lollipop. And so 407 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:46,240 Speaker 1: that's that's why they do it. It's a psychological trick, 408 00:24:46,359 --> 00:24:48,600 Speaker 1: and you're not in this case, you're not buying a 409 00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:52,800 Speaker 1: ticket anymore. You're buying the sunk cost of fallacy. These 410 00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:55,960 Speaker 1: sunk cost of fallacy. You see, once you've picked the seat, 411 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,920 Speaker 1: like on these websites or your phone, you pick the 412 00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:02,840 Speaker 1: seat and you'll line the data up. You've already imagined 413 00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:07,320 Speaker 1: having a soft pretzel, some garlic fries, that nice beer, 414 00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:10,159 Speaker 1: the cold beer on the warm day. You text all 415 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:14,760 Speaker 1: your boys in the group chat. You've committed. You're emotionally there, 416 00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:18,919 Speaker 1: you're primed to pay the nonsense fee just to avoid 417 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:23,080 Speaker 1: starting over. It's not commerce. It's a hostage negotiation with 418 00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:26,159 Speaker 1: better fonts. And you know the playbook right, because it 419 00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:29,719 Speaker 1: has not changed in the last almost fifty years, going 420 00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:32,560 Speaker 1: back to the nineteen eighties in the infomercial era. It's 421 00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:38,360 Speaker 1: just upgraded from call now to tap now, same flim 422 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:43,560 Speaker 1: flam houckerism. It's just a different screen now. The greatest 423 00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:48,960 Speaker 1: hits on this are supplies are limited. Translation, panic is profitable. 424 00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,040 Speaker 1: You better get this or you're not gonna be able 425 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:54,040 Speaker 1: to get it. Only a few left at this price, 426 00:25:54,160 --> 00:26:00,119 Speaker 1: meaning there's urgency because you never know the price this 427 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:04,159 Speaker 1: is going to go up. Assign numbers to customers. This 428 00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:07,320 Speaker 1: is also a great trick that translation on that congratulations 429 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:10,520 Speaker 1: you've been promoted to special. Now you have to pay 430 00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:14,040 Speaker 1: extra because there's someone behind you. And the countdown clock, 431 00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:18,040 Speaker 1: which is just classic fomo fear of missing out on 432 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:22,080 Speaker 1: the product. The clock is ticking. It's like a James 433 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:25,560 Speaker 1: Bond movie. You got the sticks of dynamite. You gotta 434 00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:30,160 Speaker 1: get this thing or else before the diamond dynamite blows up. Now, 435 00:26:30,160 --> 00:26:31,600 Speaker 1: this is I ought to be clear. This is not 436 00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:33,880 Speaker 1: just a San Francisco Giants thing. Although it is fun 437 00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:37,040 Speaker 1: for me to take shots at the Giants as Jay 438 00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,520 Speaker 1: Scoop and some others. No, they used to be a 439 00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:41,520 Speaker 1: rival of the Dodgers. I think they've pretty much given 440 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:44,200 Speaker 1: up at this point. Dodgers are like secretariat compared to 441 00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,639 Speaker 1: the Giants. But this lawsuit is framed as the third 442 00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:51,600 Speaker 1: of its kind. It's aimed at Major League Baseball teams 443 00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:55,520 Speaker 1: in and it's all come in the last couple of months. 444 00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:58,040 Speaker 1: Similar allegations made against the Boston Red Sox and the 445 00:26:58,119 --> 00:27:02,040 Speaker 1: Washington Nationals. In the Red Sox case, for example, they're 446 00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:07,359 Speaker 1: alleging the lawsuit a typical seven dollars order fee, which 447 00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:12,040 Speaker 1: raises the obvious question, how does clicking purchase cost seven 448 00:27:12,160 --> 00:27:18,840 Speaker 1: dollars to process? Is? Seriously, what are you doing? Is 449 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:23,680 Speaker 1: one person single handly carrying the electrons across the Charles River. 450 00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,119 Speaker 1: They're in Boston, what do they do? And then the 451 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:31,120 Speaker 1: Nationals lawsuit, which was filed in DC federal court, similarly 452 00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:36,040 Speaker 1: claims years of junk fees cheating customers out of millions, 453 00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:41,440 Speaker 1: cheating customers. It's not exactly subtle, of course, neither is 454 00:27:41,480 --> 00:27:44,680 Speaker 1: the business model. So now the giants reportedly stopped charging 455 00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:49,000 Speaker 1: these fees in July of twenty twenty four. They were 456 00:27:49,040 --> 00:27:52,280 Speaker 1: forced to because at the time, the Biden administration put 457 00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,879 Speaker 1: rules into as I understand it, to not allow these 458 00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:59,760 Speaker 1: in certain cases. And there's also a law in California, 459 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:03,080 Speaker 1: the People's Republic of California, the communist state, that has 460 00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:07,680 Speaker 1: a law there, law SB four seventy eight. I believe 461 00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:11,600 Speaker 1: it is honest pricing or hidden fees law, and it's 462 00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:15,000 Speaker 1: illegal for most businesses to advertise a price that does 463 00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:19,280 Speaker 1: not include the required fees et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, 464 00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:23,040 Speaker 1: taxes and shipping and all that stuff. So that's in California. 465 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:27,400 Speaker 1: But let me do a little Benny the butcher here 466 00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:33,840 Speaker 1: and I'm gonna trim the fat. So the stopping is nice, 467 00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:36,960 Speaker 1: the refunding is nice, like they stop, but what about 468 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:41,080 Speaker 1: the refund The lawsuit says fans haven't been paid back 469 00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:44,280 Speaker 1: for the years of alleged junk fees. And if you're 470 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:47,720 Speaker 1: a fan, that part that hits you right because it's 471 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:50,640 Speaker 1: the it's the sports equivalent hits you in the nuts 472 00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:53,280 Speaker 1: of getting called for holding after the touchdown and the 473 00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,920 Speaker 1: being told well, I don't worry. We stopped, we stopped holding. 474 00:28:56,040 --> 00:29:00,360 Speaker 1: So we're good. So great, What does the points you 475 00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:03,040 Speaker 1: took off the board? What happens to the points you 476 00:29:03,080 --> 00:29:04,800 Speaker 1: took the board? Anything with the points you took off 477 00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:06,360 Speaker 1: the board. No, you can't. You can't get those back. 478 00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,440 Speaker 1: You took the points off the board. All right. So 479 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:12,320 Speaker 1: this is why again I am rooting for lawyers, legal haymakers. 480 00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:16,760 Speaker 1: Body blows. Body blows. Not because I'm naive enough to 481 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:23,800 Speaker 1: think that every fee disappears forever, however, because somebody has 482 00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:26,520 Speaker 1: to play watchdog while the rest of us suckers are 483 00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:29,160 Speaker 1: just trying to buy a couple of seats. Or you 484 00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,280 Speaker 1: should not need you should not need an accounting fee 485 00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:36,400 Speaker 1: or degree. Rather, they shouldn't need an accounting degree and 486 00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:39,400 Speaker 1: a blood pressure cuff to buy tickets to a ballgame. 487 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:45,320 Speaker 1: And junk fees are the same monster and little different costumes. 488 00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:48,720 Speaker 1: And it's one of those things. Once you hear about 489 00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,600 Speaker 1: the trick, you can't unhear it. Once you see it, 490 00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:54,440 Speaker 1: you can't unsee it. You start spotting it everywhere. It's 491 00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 1: like the mal Ard militia of sleeper self. For example, 492 00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:00,160 Speaker 1: some of the ones that really get up my it 493 00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:04,280 Speaker 1: took us. The resort fees. That fee is like mugging 494 00:30:04,560 --> 00:30:06,880 Speaker 1: with mints on the pillow. A resort fee so you 495 00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:09,960 Speaker 1: can get a newspaper which nobody reads, and access to 496 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:14,120 Speaker 1: the gym which nobody uses. How about airline family seating fees, 497 00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:17,720 Speaker 1: which turns parenting into a pay per view event. That's 498 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:21,400 Speaker 1: always nice. I love the late payment fees that multiply 499 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:25,560 Speaker 1: like rabbits rabbit, what up rabbit in a carrot patch. 500 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:29,000 Speaker 1: You've got the overdraft fees that operate like a trapdoor. 501 00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:35,840 Speaker 1: The living wage that one living wage restaurant surcharges. And 502 00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:40,880 Speaker 1: I say this carefully and it should be addressed. You 503 00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:44,600 Speaker 1: should pay a living wage, not by passing the buck 504 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:47,960 Speaker 1: with a line item that makes the customer feel like 505 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:51,280 Speaker 1: they're the bad guy. They're the villain. You've got termination 506 00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:54,400 Speaker 1: fees for internet service. You've got to pay to break up. 507 00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:59,200 Speaker 1: You've got out of network ATM fees because you're hungry 508 00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:02,320 Speaker 1: and you're in the neighborhood and you need cash. Online 509 00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:06,520 Speaker 1: convenience fees. That's my favorite oxymoron. It's right up there 510 00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:10,520 Speaker 1: with jumbo shrimp. Shrimp not supposed to be jumbo anyway. 511 00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:13,920 Speaker 1: A lot of times. These fees are just ways, obviously 512 00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:17,080 Speaker 1: for companies to gouge you and I, and they do 513 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:20,719 Speaker 1: it in stealth bomber mode to get it, or they 514 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 1: get an unfair advantage over competitors and all that. But 515 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:26,080 Speaker 1: here's the deal. That's just the playboy. I want to 516 00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:28,400 Speaker 1: be too dramatic. That's how they do it. So advertise low. 517 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:30,960 Speaker 1: This is the oldest trick in the book. You advertise low. 518 00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:34,000 Speaker 1: You hook the customer on the product and the price point. 519 00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:38,080 Speaker 1: Then you fatten the built the last possible moment, when 520 00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:41,920 Speaker 1: the person who's shopping's brain has already moved on from 521 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:46,040 Speaker 1: should I to fine, I'm doing it like that's the 522 00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,200 Speaker 1: move there. That's the trick. Ration. And yes, I know 523 00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:55,840 Speaker 1: that professional sports teams will argue that these fees fund operations, technology, staffing. 524 00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:01,000 Speaker 1: You can insert any kind of corporate jargon you want, 525 00:32:01,520 --> 00:32:03,280 Speaker 1: and that's what they're going to say, which is okay, 526 00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:05,840 Speaker 1: that's I know they're gonna say that, But put it 527 00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:08,920 Speaker 1: in the price. Just raise a second. I go to 528 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:11,080 Speaker 1: Vegas and they have all these these junk fees. Just 529 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:13,560 Speaker 1: raise the price of the rooms. That's what you want. 530 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:16,080 Speaker 1: Just raise the price and give me a flat fee, 531 00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:17,720 Speaker 1: and that's they'll pay it if I want to go. 532 00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:19,840 Speaker 1: If not, I'll go, say somewhere else. But don't lure 533 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,040 Speaker 1: me in like the Giants did with a ten dollars ticket. 534 00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:25,560 Speaker 1: And then you do the math and you add on 535 00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: all these extra fees and all that, and two ten 536 00:32:28,360 --> 00:32:32,280 Speaker 1: dollars tickets, you add nine dollars on. I'm already halfway 537 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:35,240 Speaker 1: down the water slide at that point. Because the thing 538 00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:40,120 Speaker 1: about the fan, I would say, especially baseball fans more 539 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:43,280 Speaker 1: than some others, like you're loyal to a fall. There's 540 00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:46,080 Speaker 1: nothing worse than a bad baseball team. You still go. 541 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:49,240 Speaker 1: You show up. People show up. Early in the season, 542 00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:52,640 Speaker 1: weather's nasty, it's cold, it's rainy. It's cold and rainy. 543 00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:55,080 Speaker 1: Late in the season, in the middle oftentimes it's like 544 00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:58,360 Speaker 1: a frying pan and you're sitting out there melting and 545 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:03,480 Speaker 1: it's nightmare time. And people show up. Weather in San 546 00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:08,200 Speaker 1: Francisco's wild. You got foggy days, foggy nights, and you 547 00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:11,200 Speaker 1: go in your bullpen pukes all over itself. You still 548 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:13,400 Speaker 1: show up. You got a clown car for a lineup, 549 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:17,040 Speaker 1: doesn't matter. You're there and you pay, and you watch, 550 00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:19,560 Speaker 1: and you suffer and you celebrate it. And I think 551 00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:24,840 Speaker 1: that all most fans ask for is maybe it's being 552 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:27,920 Speaker 1: old fashioned here, just being a knucklehead. Is that the 553 00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:31,920 Speaker 1: number you see is the number you pay, and not 554 00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:35,440 Speaker 1: but wait, there's more, and not time's almost up. Check 555 00:33:35,440 --> 00:33:40,600 Speaker 1: out now, because that's not a ticketing experience. That is 556 00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:45,040 Speaker 1: a mugging with a countdown clock. So you got that. 557 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:48,600 Speaker 1: There you go, all right. It is the Ben Malar 558 00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:52,680 Speaker 1: Show on the weekends. We'll be back tomorrow with the 559 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,800 Speaker 1: Ben Maler Show. We'll have a new episode of that 560 00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:58,880 Speaker 1: tomorrow night. We've got the Fifth Hour Tomorrow the mail Bag. 561 00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:03,880 Speaker 1: On the fifth hour, we'll have Super Bowl week covers. 562 00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:07,240 Speaker 1: I will be in San Francisco later in the week, 563 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:10,000 Speaker 1: so I look forward to that. But the Mailbag is tomorrow. 564 00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:13,759 Speaker 1: Danny hopefully will join us. Have a wonderful rest of 565 00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:17,879 Speaker 1: your Saturday, the last day of January twenty twenty six, 566 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:22,480 Speaker 1: and we'll catch you on the next Fifth Hour podcast. Aloha, 567 00:34:23,640 --> 00:34:24,280 Speaker 1: my Felacia.