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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam. This is a John your og

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Speaker 1: Okay Storytime podcast host, and we got some great stories

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Speaker 1: coming up. Before that, we have a quick two minute

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Speaker 1: break from the sponsors that keep the show a lot.

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Speaker 2: I exposed my friend's affair because I've had enough of her.

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Speaker 3: I've had enough.

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Speaker 2: My now ex friend thirties female and I twenty five female,

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Speaker 2: met just after my oldest daughter was born and discharged

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Speaker 2: from the nick You. We're both PREMI moms. We had

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Speaker 2: been extremely close friends for the last six years and

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Speaker 2: practically sisters. We always had each other's backs. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from Live Living five one, nine nine, And

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Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 2: the r slash Okay Storytime separate it. I'm Sophia, and

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Speaker 2: I'm Angie and I'm Keon, and we're here to give

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Speaker 2: good advice. Goofy. But we don't have all the answers.

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Speaker 2: We only know what we do, So let us know

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Speaker 2: what you do in the comments. And Op says her

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Speaker 2: ex husband, we'll call him Bob, and her we'll call

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Speaker 2: her Taylor had been in an awful marriage. After going

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Speaker 2: to Taylor's house the first time, I learned how harmful

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Speaker 2: Bob was, but also how dysfunctional Taylor was. I understand

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Speaker 2: being a mother and things getting overwhelming, and I never

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Speaker 2: usually want to judge. However, the entire time I've known her,

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Speaker 2: she struggled to maintain her household and care for her

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Speaker 2: three kids. Her house was consistently messy and chaotic, and

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Speaker 2: she would drink heavily. There was a year or two

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Speaker 2: of no communication with her for unrelated reasons, but during

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Speaker 2: that time she divorced Bob. She eventually ended up with

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Speaker 2: her current fiance. Let's call him Kyle, since it's so fitting.

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Speaker 2: Kyle is such a bad person that he makes Bob

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Speaker 2: look like a saint. Taylor is forced into isolation by Kyle,

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Speaker 2: who is always under the influence in playing video games.

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Speaker 2: He's been known to open credit cards or loans in

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Speaker 2: her name, drain her finances, and never help with household

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Speaker 2: responsibilities or childcare. Both of them have been known to

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Speaker 2: make poor decisions regarding their children's safety. She's become a

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Speaker 2: nightmare in her own way. Back to the isolation issue.

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Speaker 2: I got them to agree to a game night with

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Speaker 2: all adults, me, Kyle, Taylor, and also now ex friend

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Speaker 2: of mine will call Jerome I wasn't up for drinking,

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Speaker 2: so I was the only one drinking juice during this

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Speaker 2: game night, Kyle decided to call Jerome a racial slur

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Speaker 2: and made continuous discriminatory comments. Oh wow, I snapped at

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Speaker 2: Kyle and he screamed back at me some awful things.

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Speaker 2: Taylor refused to intervene and we left. WHOA, Okay, that's

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Speaker 2: pretty serious, Yike, serious stuff. That night, April twenty twenty four,

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Speaker 2: Taylor and Jerome began talking and eventually ended up in

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Speaker 2: a spicy affair the night of my birthday.

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Speaker 4: I'm sorry, her current fiance calls Jerome racial slurs, and

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Speaker 4: then she's like, instead of I'm gonna break up with

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Speaker 4: this guy, I'm gonna sleep with the guy that he slurred.

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Speaker 3: It's a really good way to say I'm sorry.

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Speaker 2: They had unfair the night of my birthday, using it

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Speaker 2: as a cover to hook up. This is the earliest

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Speaker 2: that I know of personally, but I do know this

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Speaker 2: is one of many times they had slept together. She's

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Speaker 2: continued to get worse and now only gets to see

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Speaker 2: her kids once a week, but he is attempting to

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Speaker 2: get full custody. Kyle is legally not allowed alone with

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Speaker 2: her children due to his substance issues and behavior. I

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Speaker 2: repeatedly brought it up to her that she should think

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Speaker 2: about her children's well being not only with her engagement,

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Speaker 2: but also with the fact that their living situation has

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Speaker 2: become increasingly unstable. The children's living conditions have gotten progressively worse,

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Speaker 2: with inadequate sleeping arrangements and very few belongings. If they

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Speaker 2: try keeping their few toys neat, they'll be accused of

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Speaker 2: making a mess and the toys will be thrown away

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Speaker 2: for good. Taylor used to work at the same school

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Speaker 2: where I substituted, and I learned she was fired after

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Speaker 2: an incident with a special education child involving inappropriate behavior.

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Speaker 2: She is now not allowed to work with or be

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Speaker 2: around children either.

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Speaker 5: What.

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Speaker 2: Wow, so Taylor is awful. Yeah, her fiance is awful. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: she's cheating with Jerome. Why are we friends with these people?

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Speaker 2: What going on? I'm sorry. If someone gets fired for

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Speaker 2: appropriate behavior with a kid, I'm like, uh, I've yeah,

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Speaker 2: I can't be friends with you. Yeah, she is now

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Speaker 2: not allowed to work with or be around children either.

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Speaker 2: There's so much more to unpack, but I'm trying to

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Speaker 2: keep this brief. However, Yes, reports were made by many

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Speaker 2: people who've witnessed their own size to these things, but

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Speaker 2: nothing was done. Our CPS agency is known for not helping.

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Speaker 2: Now to the main issue. I've made it abundantly clear

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Speaker 2: more times than I can count that with her affair

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Speaker 2: and with how dysfunctional their relationship is, she should not

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Speaker 2: be with Kyle. She considered leaving many times, and as

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Speaker 2: someone who understands difficult relationships myself, I gave her the

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Speaker 2: benefit of the doubt. With her hesitation, I eventually realized

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Speaker 2: that this was no longer about being stuck in a

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Speaker 2: bad situation. This was how she was from the start,

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Speaker 2: and I had been blind to it out of optimism.

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Speaker 2: My partner and I ended up having to move to

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Speaker 2: a place that didn't allow pets, and it was an

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Speaker 2: emergency situation. We found close friends to have our pets

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Speaker 2: go to where we knew they would be safe, cared for, loved,

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Speaker 2: and would thrive. We get updates every day and are

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Speaker 2: still actively part of our fur babies lives Despite this.

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Speaker 2: I got a message in the middle of the night

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Speaker 2: when Taylor thought I was asleep. Roughly a week prior

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Speaker 2: to this message, she was having an indirect tantrum about

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Speaker 2: me being pregnant again. I bought a dress a year

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Speaker 2: ago with what little money we had due to the

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Speaker 2: wedding date constantly changing, but I got one that would

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Speaker 2: fit me regardless, and that she approved of. She originally

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Speaker 2: wanted me to be her maid of honor, but switched

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Speaker 2: me to a bridesmaid without telling me. WHOA, that's a

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Speaker 2: big switch, it really is. Her new maid of honor

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Speaker 2: bailed on her, and I had offered to help ensure

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Speaker 2: everything was in order, but she refused. She would punt

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Speaker 2: me out of the group chat. I learned she talked

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Speaker 2: horribly about me to someone who attempted to sleep with

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Speaker 2: my fiance, and so on, Why are we were? Are

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Speaker 2: we friends with your Where are we friends with her?

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Speaker 3: Why is she around?

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Speaker 6: I have a feeling it's like I don't know childhood friends. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: a lot of years behind this friendship or something.

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Speaker 2: She's such a bad friend, yeah, bad person, even such

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Speaker 2: a bad person. When the text came in, it said

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Speaker 2: that because of Kyle, they didn't want me in the wedding.

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Speaker 2: He had claimed I mistreated my pets. Mind you, the

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Speaker 2: situation we were in caused me to rehome them to

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Speaker 2: close friends and ensure their care and a bunch of

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Speaker 2: other things. I had finally had enough of their crap.

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Speaker 2: It wasn't about the wedding, Honestly, I was extremely relieved

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Speaker 2: to not be forced to go, and I'd been dreading

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Speaker 2: it for months because I don't take marriage or affairs lightly.

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Speaker 2: Out of respect for what I thought was my friend,

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Speaker 2: and I kept my mouth closed about the affair, including

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Speaker 2: for a better part of the time following. What bothered

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Speaker 2: me the most was that I had been there for her,

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Speaker 2: to help her every chance I got, even when she

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Speaker 2: was at her lowest points due to her drinking. I've

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Speaker 2: had things said to me and let it go. I

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Speaker 2: personally dealt with a lot but never complained. Being tossed

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Speaker 2: to the side is one thing, but being accused of

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Speaker 2: something horrible is another. My reaction in that moment was

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Speaker 2: to snap back about how they treat their household, her kids,

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Speaker 2: their relationship, and tell her she'd better tell him about

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Speaker 2: the fair then. It's not my proudest moment, but I'm

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Speaker 2: pregnant and pissed. I took a month since then to

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Speaker 2: collect myself and ended up deciding to do something I

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Speaker 2: reached out to Bob and his sister about everything the

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Speaker 2: kids have been going through and warned them about what

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Speaker 2: course she planned to take. I did this under an

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Speaker 2: alias for my own family's protection, but sent over some

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Speaker 2: proof A few weeks later. Now, I got a reminder

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Speaker 2: on my phone of their wedding coming up and ignored it.

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Speaker 2: I went on to Facebook to doom scroll and saw

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Speaker 2: my old post of when they were first hooking up.

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Speaker 2: To my knowledge, I basically said enough was enough. As

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Speaker 2: much as I absolutely hate Kyle, he never cheated on

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Speaker 2: Taylor and deserved to know. I know it may seem

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Speaker 2: like a petty thing, but I assure you I assessed it.

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Speaker 2: Prior to doing this. I got onto an alias and

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Speaker 2: messaged Kyle about the affair. I can't take that to

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Speaker 2: my grave either, and it's been eating at me since

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Speaker 2: I was aware of it. They used me to cover

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Speaker 2: for them more times than I can count, and I

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Speaker 2: absolutely hate things like this. I needed to put this

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Speaker 2: to rest and not worry about a friendship breaking when

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Speaker 2: it's already been broken. It's also been causing significant stress

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Speaker 2: to me, no matter how hard I tried to ignore it.

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Speaker 2: With heart failure, it's already affected my health substantially. Oh wow,

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Speaker 2: but I feel selfish for needing this skeleton out of

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Speaker 2: my closet and back to where it belongs. Wow wow.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, honestly, Like, I'm never one for, you know, like

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Speaker 6: revenge or anything like that. This doesn't even I mean

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Speaker 6: you could call it revenge, I guess, but like if

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Speaker 6: you're not going to be friends with her anyway. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: and they certainly aren't going to be friends with her. Yeah, certainly,

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Speaker 6: hope not. And it's if it's been affecting your health too. Like,

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Speaker 6: I think I'm pretty okay with you telling him. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: I think I'm pretty okay.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I definitely think that we should have stopped being her

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Speaker 2: friend when she started cheating on someone actively. Yeah, definitely

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Speaker 2: think we should have stopped being her friend when she

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Speaker 2: got banned from being around minors. Yeah, that's those are concerning.

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Speaker 2: Lots of good.

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Speaker 3: Reasons to stop being her friend.

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Speaker 2: Edit. So today's the day of their wedding. Kyle has

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Speaker 2: not seen my message yet, so I took a more

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Speaker 2: drastic measure. Boy. I went through my text and found

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Speaker 2: the proof of Taylor's affair with Jerome. I had evidence

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Speaker 2: from when I was helping coordinate things between them, not

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Speaker 2: knowing the full extent of what was happening. The text

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Speaker 2: show me acting as a go between back in January.

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Speaker 2: Why were we acting as a go between? On January sixth,

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Speaker 2: round ten pm, I was texting Jerome's saying I was

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Speaker 2: talking to Taylor and she wasn't opposed to something, and

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Speaker 2: he responded excitedly. Twenty minutes later, I told them to

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Speaker 2: pick up his phone because Taylor had said yes to

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Speaker 2: him taking her out on a date that Friday. I'm

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Speaker 2: so sorry. So you knew? Are we in middle school? Also?

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Speaker 2: You absolutely? Like op said, oh yeah, I didn't know

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Speaker 2: the full extent. You knew that he you knew they

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Speaker 2: were cheating together.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, what you're doing middle school?

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Speaker 6: Like, Hey, Taylor has a crush on you, Jerome? Okay,

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Speaker 6: Taylor said yes that she would go on a date

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Speaker 6: with you.

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Speaker 2: What Yeah, Taylor, Shelley says, hear me out. Everyone sucks here.

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Speaker 2: I don't need to hear you out because I agree.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, honestly. Now now, yeah, that's weird.

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Speaker 2: Then, on January tenth, which was my birthday party, where

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Speaker 2: they hooked up for the first time, Jerome texted Five

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Speaker 2: years later, with crying emojis. After we all went home

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Speaker 2: around midnight and they left together at two o seven am,

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Speaker 2: Jerome texted me, dropping her off in three minutes. I

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Speaker 2: have more evidence, but I need to find it. Since

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Speaker 2: most of their communication was through calls, snapchat, and in

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Speaker 2: person conversations, looking at these texts now, I can see

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Speaker 2: how I was being used to help facilitate their affair

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Speaker 2: without fully understanding what was happening at the time.

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Speaker 6: You come on, I mean maybe she's saying date now no,

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Speaker 6: but like back then she just thought they're hanging out.

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Speaker 2: But still, like come on, like use your brain. If

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Speaker 2: someone says, hey, can you text this person for me? Right,

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking, are they like into each other? Yeah, like,

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Speaker 2: oh they're hanging out? Yeah? Because why just why?

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Speaker 6: I mean, any of it is just like so middle

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Speaker 6: school of like having a go between like that. But

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Speaker 6: if it was just like a friend thing, it's like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 6: like just can I have her number? Yes, and then

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Speaker 6: I'll text her weird or weird it's so weird.

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Speaker 2: But that is the end of that story.

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Speaker 7: Folks.

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Speaker 2: Yep, yikes everyone story. Yeah, my friend ruined my proposal.

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Speaker 5: Then she deleted the pictures they're out there still.

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Speaker 2: I twenty six female and my partner now fiance, twenty

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Speaker 2: nine male, have been together for six years and have

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Speaker 2: two awesome kids together, four male and one male. Can

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Speaker 2: you really know if they're that awesome?

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Speaker 5: If they're one in four, I don't know. My future

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Speaker 5: kids are gonna be awesome. Already know that I already

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Speaker 5: know my kids already. Kids are awesome.

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Speaker 2: And my childhood friend twenty six female, will call her

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Speaker 2: Allison had always spoken about how she would be involved

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Speaker 2: in my engagement somehow. For example, we joke about her

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Speaker 2: being hidden in a bush somewhere taken photos while he proposed.

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Speaker 2: By the way this comes from, it's all good, you know,

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Speaker 2: And if you want to submit your own stories, go

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Speaker 2: to the r slash Okay story time severed it. I'm Sophia,

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Speaker 2: I'm Keon, I'm Riley, and we're here to give good advice. Goofy.

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Speaker 2: But we don't have all the answers. We only know

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Speaker 2: what we'd do, So let us know what you would

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Speaker 2: do in the comments, and OP says, my partner will

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Speaker 2: call him Jay had been looking for a ring around

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Speaker 2: five months and planning the actual engagement for around one month.

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Speaker 2: Allison lives a seven hour drive from US, and we

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Speaker 2: had organized to go to hers for the weekend. Jay

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Speaker 2: and Allison had been planning the proposal, which I was

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Speaker 2: most oblivious to, which I was mostly oblivious to, though

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Speaker 2: I had my suspicions. I was told on the night

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Speaker 2: to be ready for UH five thirty, as the table

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Speaker 2: was booked for six. So I was ready for five

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Speaker 2: forty and we set off, getting there on time. Allison

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Speaker 2: had set off about ten to fifteen minutes before me,

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Speaker 2: Jay and the kids. We got to the restaurant and

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Speaker 2: after a while I went outside with our four year

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Speaker 2: old to play hide and seek. I was followed out

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Speaker 2: shortly by Jay and Allison. While my back was turned,

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Speaker 2: Jay got on one knee and asked me to marry

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Speaker 2: him while Allison was videoing, oh oh man, oh man wow.

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Speaker 2: I said yes, but I was extremely distracted by our

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Speaker 2: four year old who was running around. We had the meal,

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Speaker 2: which cost three hundred and twenty pounds. Alison then told

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Speaker 2: me when we sat back down, that was video.

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Speaker 5: That's not bad. Did when you're celebrating, that's not bad?

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Speaker 8: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, three hundred twenty pounds pricey, hey, pricey, But also

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry the video didn't record. The whole ordeal was

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Speaker 2: extremely disappointing and anticlimactic. Jay knew what I wanted for

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Speaker 2: a proposal photos, a nice area, something small and cute.

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Speaker 2: I didn't want much. It just wasn't anything like that,

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Speaker 2: and ad insult. The video didn't record. The food was

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Speaker 2: really poor in the restaurant, especially for three hundred and

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Speaker 2: twenty pounds. I'm sorry it was bad and three hundred and.

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Speaker 5: Twenty pounds dang, yeah, that sucks.

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Speaker 2: And they made mistakes on the orders too. The restaurant

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Speaker 2: itself was a bit drab. We were crammed in a corner.

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Speaker 2: The high shair ha no straps, so the one year

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Speaker 2: old kept escaping, and the gardens that had been described

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Speaker 2: Jay as lovely were small and honestly less than average. Anyhow,

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Speaker 2: I spoke to Jay when we got home. We discussed

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Speaker 2: how disappointed we both were. He then explained that he

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Speaker 2: had asked Alison where the nicest restaurant in the area was,

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Speaker 2: and she recommended the place. I'm sorry she recommended mm,

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Speaker 2: she recommended this place and forgot to record. She sabotaged you.

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Speaker 5: She ruined your day.

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Speaker 2: She literally ruined your day. Jay then asked Alison if

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Speaker 2: she could have the table dressed with flowers and made

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Speaker 2: to look really nice, which Alison agreed to do. Alison

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Speaker 2: has a really nice property, and Jay had said what

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Speaker 2: he wanted to do was proposed to me in a

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Speaker 2: beautiful part of the property. Alison was supposed to tell

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Speaker 2: me we were going to get some family photos, then

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Speaker 2: he would propose while we had the kids, getting the

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Speaker 2: reaction on camera and some really nice pictures of me

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Speaker 2: and then the boy and the boys. Then we go

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Speaker 2: to the restaurant, celebrate and have some nice food. The

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Speaker 2: only part of this she did.

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Speaker 5: Was book a table, not even like pretty much the

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Speaker 5: them the barest to you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, offered money to Alison for decorations and the whole

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Speaker 2: thing too, so money wasn't a problem. She didn't ask

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Speaker 2: me to go outside and take photos to give Jay

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Speaker 2: the opportunity to propose before we went out. The area

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Speaker 2: on Allison's property where I originally wanted to propose wasn't available,

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Speaker 2: and Jay only found that out an hour before. I'm sorry,

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Speaker 2: the area on her property wasn't available. She's a freaking liar.

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Speaker 2: She's a liar. But there were plenty of other places.

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Speaker 2: I think this just highlights the disorganization.

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Speaker 5: Again.

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Speaker 2: She didn't dress the table, and she took no photos

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Speaker 2: or videos. She did try to video the proposal, but

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Speaker 2: it didn't record a genuine mistake, but I would have

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Speaker 2: hoped at a time like this she'd have been more careful.

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Speaker 2: She didn't take any photos after the proposal either while

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Speaker 2: we were at the restaurant, so I have no photos

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Speaker 2: of me and my boys, and one of the main

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Speaker 2: reasons Alison was involved was to take pictures to add

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Speaker 2: Jay was completely capable of organizing the proposal, and he

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Speaker 2: could have contacted the restaurant to arrange flowers on the

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Speaker 2: table and explain it was a proposal, but he wanted

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Speaker 2: to involve Allison, as per previous conversations we all had,

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Speaker 2: and she said she was happy to sort it. She's

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Speaker 2: a little liar. I just don't understand why nothing went

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Speaker 2: to plan and why she didn't keep up her end

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Speaker 2: of the deal. Am I the ale And there are

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Speaker 2: some comments that I think are going to read through

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Speaker 2: Allison's lies and deceit. Comment one not the a hole.

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Speaker 2: Alison clearly adds some resentment towards you and Jay. She's

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Speaker 2: sabotaged the engagement deliberately. If she's not prepared to offer

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Speaker 2: an apology or explanation, I'd consider distancing yourself until she

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Speaker 2: gets her act together. Don't let her be made of honor, bridesmaid,

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Speaker 2: or be involved in any part of the planning of

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Speaker 2: the wedding. Yeah, don't. Absolutely don't let her plan anything

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Speaker 2: in this wedding. Oh, he says. I'm honestly surprised. This

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Speaker 2: is the first with this insight. As the people irl

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Speaker 2: I've told have said this. It's not something I ever

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Speaker 2: would have thought of myself either. I just don't see

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Speaker 2: how she could ever have any resentment towards me. She's gorgeous,

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Speaker 2: I mean gorgeous, kind, sweet, just such a loving person.

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Speaker 2: We've spoken briefly today, she asked how I was. Had

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Speaker 2: a bit of a small talk, but no mention of

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Speaker 2: the engagement or anything. You need to talk about it now.

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Speaker 2: My plan was for her to be made of honor

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Speaker 2: and of course have a big part in my wedding,

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Speaker 2: but this has definitely made me consider this not being

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Speaker 2: an option. I really hope there's a good explanation, mental

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Speaker 2: health or something I don't know. And there is another

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Speaker 2: comment but yeah, like I think op is being very

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Speaker 2: forgiving and very understand or wanting to be very understanding.

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Speaker 5: Is genuinely mistakes do happen? Yeah, if it's such an

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Speaker 5: important like birthday, like it was a birthday, okay, but

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Speaker 5: this is literally a proposal and it's a huge event.

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Speaker 2: And it wasn't just the recording, it was six different things.

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Speaker 5: And it yeah, like come on, yeah, you failed, not

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Speaker 5: just one thing, you failed pretty much every single task

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Speaker 5: other than getting a table. Yeah, that's bare.

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Speaker 2: Oh they got a table. Yeah, I guess that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Comment two. So your friend didn't record your fiance proposing

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Speaker 2: and your engagement is ruined. How does that track? You're

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Speaker 2: the a hole? What? What weird? Comment OPI says it's

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00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,600
Speaker 2: more of the fact she didn't go with his plan

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Speaker 2: at all, didn't trust the table, didn't set the opportunity

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Speaker 2: up at her property like had been organized, didn't take

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Speaker 2: any photos after the mistake of the recording not happening,

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Speaker 2: seemed genuine, which was fine. Common three says I'm confounded

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Speaker 2: by how much importance you put on having your engagement

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Speaker 2: event being just so, being just so?

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Speaker 4: What is this?

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Speaker 2: Engagements are important? Your fiance sounds great, kind, flexible, accommodating,

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00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:56,240
Speaker 2: and understanding. Your fixation on how everything needs to be

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Speaker 2: is your choice, but it also sets you up for disappointment.

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Speaker 2: I'm not saying you are doing anything wrong. It's your choice,

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Speaker 2: but from my view, you are distracting yourself from what

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00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:08,159
Speaker 2: you have. A wonderful relationship with an incredible sounding partner

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Speaker 2: with emphasis on appearance and ceremony. You to you, but

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Speaker 2: from the perspective of someone who has lived twice as

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Speaker 2: long as you, Okay, well, you haven't learned anything. The

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00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,919
Speaker 2: created pomp and circumstance may not matter as much as

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Speaker 2: the substance of your partnership and the memories you make

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Speaker 2: together along the way.

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Speaker 5: Peace.

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Speaker 2: Why does comments Hope says, My fiance is great. He

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00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:32,800
Speaker 2: is everything you have described him as more and more.

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Speaker 2: My frustration is with my friend not showing up how

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Speaker 2: she said she would and not doing the things she

393
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Speaker 2: said she would. That's where my frustration is. You are

394
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Speaker 2: right though, in the grand scheme of things, this doesn't matter,

395
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Speaker 2: and in my relationship it certainly doesn't. But maybe it

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00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:50,000
Speaker 2: does matter for my friendship and how much effort she's

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00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,720
Speaker 2: willing to put into other things. If she didn't put

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Speaker 2: the effort in here that she said she had. Reply,

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00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:57,960
Speaker 2: I would take this as a lesson to have realistic

400
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:01,160
Speaker 2: expectations for your friend. If you want or need something

401
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:04,600
Speaker 2: done professionally, hire a professional. If you're okay with whatever

402
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:07,560
Speaker 2: comes out, including nothing, let your friend do it. And

403
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 2: there is an update. That's the only reasonable comment.

404
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:13,520
Speaker 5: I mean, yeah, I guess that's very true. But like, still.

405
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Speaker 2: Friends do that, like all the time. Friends and family

406
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:19,119
Speaker 2: help plan engagement parties all the time. It's like, I

407
00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:22,520
Speaker 2: feel like, usually that's what engagements aren't, the ones being

408
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Speaker 2: planned by.

409
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Speaker 5: Professional That's what friends are for.

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Speaker 2: That's literally what friends are for.

411
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Speaker 5: And I get it. I've seen proposals where there are

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Speaker 5: professional photographers there to film it, and that's okay. But

413
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Speaker 5: it's also like, but usually it's sweet when you have

414
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,320
Speaker 5: your friends around you and you're like, ah, yeah, sweet,

415
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Speaker 5: I don't know that's and.

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Speaker 2: Also usually you have like if you do have a

417
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Speaker 2: professional photographer, you also have like someone recorded, like a

418
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Speaker 2: friend recording too, and you have like a bunch of

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Speaker 2: other stuff.

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Speaker 5: Sorry, guys, again, this is not a birthday that we

421
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:52,040
Speaker 5: do every single year. This is a proposal that should

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Speaker 5: be a special moment. Come on, and we don't get

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Speaker 5: to a practice for this.

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Speaker 2: There is an update though. I asked Alison for the

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Speaker 2: photos from the day she sent them over. There were

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Speaker 2: a few photos of the kids, in one of me

427
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:06,800
Speaker 2: smiling with my ring, which is a nice photo. No

428
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Speaker 2: photos of me and Jay or me and Jay and

429
00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:11,639
Speaker 2: the boys. Jay had taken some photos of me and

430
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,520
Speaker 2: Allison on Allison's phone, which we looked at after and

431
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:17,240
Speaker 2: they looked cute. I asked her for those photos and

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Speaker 2: she said she deleted them because she was blurry.

433
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:24,400
Speaker 5: She was first of all, why are their photos of you? Like, yeah,

434
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:27,240
Speaker 5: there should be a couple, but like, it's not about you.

435
00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:32,880
Speaker 2: What she wasn't I'd seen the photos, she said she'd

436
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:36,040
Speaker 2: check her recently deleted, but they weren't in there. It

437
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:38,399
Speaker 2: was obvious she deleted the photos because she didn't like

438
00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 2: how she looked. But I can't help but feel they

439
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,359
Speaker 2: weren't her memories to delete. I don't care if she

440
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:46,320
Speaker 2: looked like a swamp monster in photos. She didn't. It

441
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:47,080
Speaker 2: wasn't about her.

442
00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:49,000
Speaker 5: All I was saying to her is like, hmm, you

443
00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 5: know what you do look a little blurry. I guess

444
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:53,840
Speaker 5: you won't be appearing in any of our wedding photos.

445
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you're not gonna be in the wedding at all. Bye.

446
00:22:57,960 --> 00:22:58,879
Speaker 5: Yeah that's crazy.

447
00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:04,480
Speaker 2: Yy Yay, what a nightmare this girl is. Me and

448
00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:07,440
Speaker 2: Alison haven't really spoken since we got home. We left

449
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:09,879
Speaker 2: a day earlier than we were supposed to. Me and

450
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 2: Jay have spoken about it and are both equally gutted

451
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,919
Speaker 2: because he thought him and Alison had sorted things to

452
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 2: be special, but they weren't. So am I the ale?

453
00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 2: How do I even move on from this? And?

454
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:21,160
Speaker 4: Edit?

455
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:21,560
Speaker 7: Ad?

456
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 2: Jay actually took the rienback, booked a whole new venue,

457
00:23:24,359 --> 00:23:27,080
Speaker 2: a spa for the day after, and proposed again with pictures,

458
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:30,639
Speaker 2: nice videos, spawns and a willow tree my favorite. He

459
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 2: was capable of planning a nice engagement, but Alison had

460
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:37,960
Speaker 2: wanted to be involved. I adore Allison. We've been friends

461
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:41,400
Speaker 2: for twenty years. I'm just really disappointed she didn't put

462
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,560
Speaker 2: the effort into this that I would have expected her to.

463
00:23:44,119 --> 00:23:46,320
Speaker 2: If it was too much, I'd have hoped she'd have

464
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:48,680
Speaker 2: said it was too much, rather than just not doing

465
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 2: anything that had been discussed exactly.

466
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:53,399
Speaker 5: Yeah, the fact that you're like, oh, put me up

467
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:58,120
Speaker 5: to the task coach. Literally negative effort was given.

468
00:23:58,800 --> 00:23:59,600
Speaker 2: You suck girl.

469
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:02,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, I would have a discussion. I don't even just

470
00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 5: even she's not even owed that.

471
00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:07,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, she'd be like, hey, you really dropped ball and

472
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:11,560
Speaker 2: I you're not gonna be bad Honor're not gonna be

473
00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 2: in the bridal party.

474
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 5: You're like, I can't depend on you for any of

475
00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:16,119
Speaker 5: that anything. So sorry.

476
00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 2: If I can't rely on you, then what where are we? Friends?

477
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:23,919
Speaker 7: Yeah, my girlfriend wants to intervene before her best friend

478
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 7: gets married.

479
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 2: Stop in the name of love.

480
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:34,240
Speaker 7: I thirty seven male and my girlfriend, let's call her Lil,

481
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:37,880
Speaker 7: thirty female, have been together for just over a year

482
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:41,080
Speaker 7: and we have a wonderful relationship. We met on a

483
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:44,120
Speaker 7: dating app and hit it off really well. Lil had

484
00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:46,440
Speaker 7: just come out of a bad relationship and wasn't looking

485
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:49,760
Speaker 7: for anything serious, but we clicked. We've been together pretty

486
00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:53,000
Speaker 7: much since our first date and we're very happy. By

487
00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:55,040
Speaker 7: the way, this comes from user help Friend thirty one

488
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:56,840
Speaker 7: fifty and if you want to submit your own stories,

489
00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,640
Speaker 7: go to the r slash Okay story time subur I'm Dakota,

490
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:00,240
Speaker 7: I'm I'm.

491
00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:01,280
Speaker 2: Sophia, I'm Riley.

492
00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:05,800
Speaker 7: We're here to give good advice, goofily, But we don't

493
00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:07,959
Speaker 7: have all the answers. We only know what we would do,

494
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:11,200
Speaker 7: So let us know what you would do in the comments.

495
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:16,480
Speaker 7: As Op says, Lil's lifelong best friend, let's call her Honey,

496
00:25:16,520 --> 00:25:19,400
Speaker 7: thirty female, has been part of her life since childhood.

497
00:25:19,880 --> 00:25:24,159
Speaker 7: They've shared countless memories, vacations, sports, they're both in the

498
00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 7: same sports club, and relationship ups and downs. Even their

499
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,760
Speaker 7: mothers are best friends. They're like sisters. If they're ever

500
00:25:32,359 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 7: if they've ever had rough patches, it's usually because of

501
00:25:35,119 --> 00:25:40,560
Speaker 7: outside drama caused by their parents, not between the two

502
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 7: of them. So now we come to the current situation,

503
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:47,120
Speaker 7: which leads me to write on Reddit. I have followed

504
00:25:47,119 --> 00:25:49,800
Speaker 7: these stories online and asked my girlfriend if she thinks

505
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:52,560
Speaker 7: it's a good idea to see what strangers think about

506
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,760
Speaker 7: this saga. Before Lil and I got together, there was

507
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:59,600
Speaker 7: a period where both she and Honey were single and

508
00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:04,800
Speaker 7: cat dating. During that time, Honey met Pete through mutual friends.

509
00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 7: I think they started texting and meeting up, but they

510
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,479
Speaker 7: weren't officially a couple. In October, Lil and Honey went

511
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,440
Speaker 7: on vacation together for a week abroad They were both

512
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 7: single and did typically and did the typical single girls

513
00:26:18,359 --> 00:26:22,400
Speaker 7: on holiday stuff, but nothing serious happened. Despite not being

514
00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 7: official with Honey, Pete was blowing up her phone during

515
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:31,520
Speaker 7: the entire trip, accusing her of sleeping with emertaper guys.

516
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 7: She knows all about that.

517
00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:41,240
Speaker 2: Okay, whoa whoa not being official sweet spot?

518
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:45,440
Speaker 7: Okay, that's the money zone, Okay, all right. He even

519
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 7: went as far as asking Lil while on a video

520
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:51,639
Speaker 7: call with Honey if they hooked up with guys they'd met.

521
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:55,400
Speaker 7: He didn't know Lil and was pushing in an upset

522
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,679
Speaker 7: manner to get information from her. Honey moved out of

523
00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:02,359
Speaker 7: the frame and nodded her head, signaling to Lil to lie.

524
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:06,040
Speaker 7: After the trip, Honey didn't break things off with Pete. Instead,

525
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,000
Speaker 7: she started lying to him about what she was doing.

526
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,520
Speaker 7: In November, Lill and I met and started dating. Things

527
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:14,000
Speaker 7: went so well that we both ended things with other

528
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:17,840
Speaker 7: people quickly and became exclusive, though not official yet.

529
00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:20,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so reasonable.

530
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 7: I don't have a great relationship with most of my family,

531
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 7: so Christmas gatherings are small, just me, my nephew and

532
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 7: his girlfriend. Since board games are dull with just three people.

533
00:27:34,119 --> 00:27:36,960
Speaker 7: I asked Lil to join us, even though we'd only

534
00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:40,040
Speaker 7: been seeing each other a few weeks. She agreed, and

535
00:27:40,119 --> 00:27:44,119
Speaker 7: it turned out to be a wonderful evening. We ate, drank,

536
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 7: played games, and had fun. After my nephew and his

537
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 7: girlfriend left, we went to bed. The next morning, I

538
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 7: went to make coffee and returned to find Lil in

539
00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:57,159
Speaker 7: tears shaking. While I was gone, she had listened to

540
00:27:57,240 --> 00:28:00,399
Speaker 7: voicemails Pete had left her between three thirty four in

541
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 7: the morning the night before. In them, he shouted at her,

542
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 7: accused her of being a bad influence, and said he

543
00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 7: wouldn't stay with Honey as long as Lil was part

544
00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:09,920
Speaker 7: of her life.

545
00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 2: Well, then let's get rid of Pete.

546
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:17,159
Speaker 7: Yeah, audios pe PDPDPD. I recorded the voicemails on my

547
00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:21,000
Speaker 7: phone in case he deleted them. Later, we discussed going

548
00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 7: to the police, but Lil decided instead to call Honey.

549
00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:28,199
Speaker 7: Honey brushed it off, saying Pete had been wasted and emotional,

550
00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:30,360
Speaker 7: and promised to make him apologize.

551
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:32,960
Speaker 2: I am also, it's like we just did not get

552
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:34,000
Speaker 2: what exactly he did.

553
00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:38,160
Speaker 7: It's it's unclear whether or not, Honey, I guess what

554
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:41,160
Speaker 7: Honey was doing. Later that day, Pete sent Lil a

555
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 7: short text apology and considered the matter closed. Honey didn't

556
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:50,080
Speaker 7: address it further. Lil blocked him everywhere and decided not

557
00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:50,960
Speaker 7: to press charges.

558
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 2: What happened.

559
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:53,560
Speaker 7: He must have threatened me, you must have.

560
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:56,000
Speaker 2: Done something, because there's no way that you're they're just saying, oh,

561
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 2: press charges for no reason.

562
00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 7: Yeah, there had to have been a threat.

563
00:28:58,800 --> 00:28:59,720
Speaker 2: Yeah.

564
00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 7: We Later, Honey and Lil left on another long vacation together.

565
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 7: I was sad because I really liked to spending time

566
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:08,440
Speaker 7: with Lil, but I wanted her to enjoy her trip.

567
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:12,400
Speaker 7: I would be nervous if my girlfriend was going on

568
00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:16,000
Speaker 7: a trip with the girl who does cheat on her

569
00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 7: boyfriend and told her July, I'd be like, well, you're

570
00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:19,560
Speaker 7: not gonna do that.

571
00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 2: Honey is the bad influence, right.

572
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:25,200
Speaker 7: Since she didn't buy a phone plan for the destination,

573
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:29,440
Speaker 7: we agreed to keep communication light, just occasional texts when

574
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:32,560
Speaker 7: she had Wi Fi. The problem was, Honey did buy

575
00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:36,520
Speaker 7: a phone plan. This meant she was constantly texting and

576
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 7: calling Pete throughout the trip, reassuring him she wasn't cheating hikes.

577
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:43,200
Speaker 7: She even had to confirm things like not sleeping with

578
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:47,680
Speaker 7: the pilot during a one hour flight between islands. Meanwhile,

579
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 7: Lil was sidelined often ignored while Honey focused on Pete's paranoia. Eventually,

580
00:29:54,360 --> 00:29:57,800
Speaker 7: Lil asked if she could also have quick calls with me,

581
00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 7: just like Honey was doing this upse set Honey, who

582
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:03,800
Speaker 7: accused us of being constantly on the phone.

583
00:30:03,880 --> 00:30:07,120
Speaker 2: That's crazy. That's crazy for her to be constantly on

584
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 2: the phone with her boyfriend being like, I'm not cheating

585
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:11,600
Speaker 2: on you. I'm not cheating on you, and then Lil

586
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,120
Speaker 2: being like, hey, do you mind if i'd call my boyfriend.

587
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:16,120
Speaker 7: She's like boing flip.

588
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 2: Terrio, you're obsessed with your boyfriend.

589
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 7: Boing fwip. To keep the peace, Lil reduced our calls.

590
00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:27,040
Speaker 7: Pete also started setting bizarre rules, like making their profile

591
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:31,280
Speaker 7: picture a couple's photo. Unsurprisingly, the vacation wasn't as great

592
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:34,400
Speaker 7: as Lil had hoped. Honey and Lil didn't even get

593
00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 7: around to talking about Pete's voicemails by the time they

594
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,959
Speaker 7: were on their way back. I offered to fetch them

595
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 7: at the airport and bring them both home, since it

596
00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:45,560
Speaker 7: didn't make sense for two guys to drive ninety minutes

597
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 7: each way. So everyone agreed to this plan initially, but

598
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 7: just before they left, Pete decided to drive Honey home himself.

599
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:54,440
Speaker 7: I think he probably worried she might sleep with me

600
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 7: on the way.

601
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,120
Speaker 2: It's what I said, That's what I said.

602
00:30:57,200 --> 00:31:00,960
Speaker 7: Come on, Pete, you're pathetic. After the Holly, the situation

603
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,840
Speaker 7: stayed at status quo. Pete did not reach out to

604
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:07,880
Speaker 7: Lil to apologize, and Lil refused to give in a

605
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,840
Speaker 7: few weeks later was Lil's birthday. We went to an

606
00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:13,800
Speaker 7: escape room and then for dinner. I got to know

607
00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:16,960
Speaker 7: Honey better, and she is a wonderful, beautiful, smart woman.

608
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 7: Don't tell Pete that, don't doubt, Do not tell Pete that.

609
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:23,240
Speaker 7: Don't do not repeat that to Pete.

610
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:24,520
Speaker 2: Nope, So I.

611
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 7: Didn't understand what she sees in Pete. That evening she

612
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:31,320
Speaker 7: told me she was looking for apartments with Pete, though

613
00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 7: she hadn't told Lil yet. They continued to do sport

614
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:38,920
Speaker 7: together and sometimes went out, sometimes with me, but never

615
00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:42,760
Speaker 7: anything with Pete. Honey did tell Lily that he improved

616
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 7: with his jealousy issues, but other problems came to light.

617
00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 7: He lost his driver's license because of Oh, he seems

618
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:56,120
Speaker 7: to drink too much and gets aggressive sometimes sometimes drives

619
00:31:56,240 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 7: win wasted, attacked friends of Honey verbally, and in at

620
00:31:59,560 --> 00:32:01,920
Speaker 7: least one case, grabbed her hikes.

621
00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 2: This is all very concerning.

622
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:06,040
Speaker 7: Throw Pete in the ocean.

623
00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:07,600
Speaker 2: In the ocean right away.

624
00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:08,800
Speaker 7: He can swim.

625
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:11,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, he'll be fine, He'll learn, and then he can

626
00:32:11,840 --> 00:32:14,560
Speaker 2: go swim and find a new woman once.

627
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:17,680
Speaker 7: He also sulked and gave silent treatment for a whole

628
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 7: day during a long vacation because Honey noted the points

629
00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 7: of a card game wrong. During the trip, they were

630
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,960
Speaker 7: talking about children and decided that Honey should stop birth control.

631
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 2: What the fun? What Honey should not have a child

632
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 2: with Pete?

633
00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 7: Come on, man?

634
00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:33,400
Speaker 2: No.

635
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 7: After the point counting incident, she decided it was better

636
00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:41,920
Speaker 7: to stay on, but didn't tell him that he thought

637
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:45,000
Speaker 7: they were trying when they weren't. After a few weeks,

638
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,960
Speaker 7: she then decided it would be a good idea to

639
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:50,080
Speaker 7: start a family with this man and went off birth control.

640
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,280
Speaker 7: What the f li.

641
00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 2: Honey, Honey, Honey, honey.

642
00:32:56,440 --> 00:33:01,600
Speaker 7: Op continues, Honey is not in a in this whole story.

643
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:05,000
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, it didn't seem like that. Seemed like she

644
00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:06,280
Speaker 2: was hooking up with other guys.

645
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:11,400
Speaker 7: Honey is still friends with her ex Joseph. At the

646
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:14,440
Speaker 7: beginning of Honey's relationship with Pete, they discussed this topic

647
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 7: and he said he didn't want her to see Joseph anymore.

648
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:21,000
Speaker 7: I agree nobody can decide who their significant other has

649
00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:24,800
Speaker 7: contact with. Yet either Honey should say she doesn't agree

650
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 7: and communicate that she still meets Joseph, or she should

651
00:33:28,120 --> 00:33:31,720
Speaker 7: respect this boundary. But she still meets Joseph every week

652
00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 7: for lunch, sometimes going out with friends, drinking and often

653
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:38,920
Speaker 7: flirting together. And Pete has no idea. Every time Lil

654
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 7: attempts to speak to Honey about Pete's toxic behavior, she

655
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 7: just ignores her. If something comes over texts, she ghosts her. Once,

656
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:49,840
Speaker 7: Honey and Lil went to an event together and had

657
00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:54,840
Speaker 7: a blast. While they were enjoying the concerts, Joseph, by coincidence,

658
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:57,280
Speaker 7: met them and hung around with them and other friends

659
00:33:57,320 --> 00:34:00,720
Speaker 7: the whole evening. With every drink, Honey and Joejoseph got

660
00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 7: closer like magnets. When my girlfriend said she wanted to

661
00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:11,920
Speaker 7: go home. At this point we lived together, Honey first

662
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,400
Speaker 7: wanted to stay with the others. Lil insisted that Honey

663
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:18,719
Speaker 7: should come with us, as she didn't want to be

664
00:34:18,760 --> 00:34:21,879
Speaker 7: alone at three am and was sure nothing good would

665
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 7: happen between Honey and Joseph. Honey eventually agreed and they

666
00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:29,560
Speaker 7: had one of those late night conversations. On the way home,

667
00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 7: Lil expressed that the relationship between Honey and Pete made

668
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 7: her a different person. Honey's lying to her boyfriend and

669
00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 7: her best friend and expecting others to lie to Pete too,

670
00:34:41,360 --> 00:34:45,360
Speaker 7: since everyone knows she still meets Joseph except him. A

671
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:48,280
Speaker 7: few days later, Lil and Honey met again and followed

672
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 7: up on their discussion. Honey admitted that it was partly

673
00:34:51,640 --> 00:34:55,920
Speaker 7: true and said she wasn't sure about her relationship, then.

674
00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 2: Why are you having a baby with this man or

675
00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:02,280
Speaker 2: trying to have a baby. That's crazy. It's the dumbest

676
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:04,000
Speaker 2: thing you could do, very dumb.

677
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:09,200
Speaker 7: She mentioned uh practical reasons like the new apartment as

678
00:35:09,200 --> 00:35:11,919
Speaker 7: to why she wouldn't break up right away. Lil came

679
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:14,880
Speaker 7: home hopeful, thinking maybe things were moving in the right direction.

680
00:35:15,520 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 7: I honestly feel sorry for my girlfriend. I also have

681
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:21,239
Speaker 7: lifelong friends who are like family to me. I can

682
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:24,120
Speaker 7: feel the distance growing between Honey and Lil, and I

683
00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,320
Speaker 7: wish they could keep their friendship forever. Honey just doesn't

684
00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:31,400
Speaker 7: seem to be able to make reasonable decisions concerning Joseph

685
00:35:31,440 --> 00:35:35,360
Speaker 7: and doesn't make him apologize to Lil. If my significant

686
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:37,800
Speaker 7: other did something like this to one of my friends,

687
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:41,279
Speaker 7: I would push her every day to reconcile. As it's

688
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:43,879
Speaker 7: going now, Honey and Lil see each other maybe every

689
00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:48,320
Speaker 7: two months, except for weekly trainings. Lil doesn't visit Honey

690
00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:51,400
Speaker 7: if Pete's around. We don't do couples evenings with them,

691
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 7: even though we love doing those with other friends. It's

692
00:35:54,719 --> 00:35:59,440
Speaker 7: just not a pleasant situation now. We Lil and I

693
00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:02,840
Speaker 7: came back from a wonderful vacation and on the following Monday,

694
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:05,640
Speaker 7: Honey and Lil had to attend a sports club meeting.

695
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:08,920
Speaker 7: That is when Honey showed Lil the ring on her finger.

696
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:11,880
Speaker 7: Lil just managed to say she was happy for her,

697
00:36:12,040 --> 00:36:16,800
Speaker 7: yet definitely not for herself. Oh Honey, Oh Honey, Honey,

698
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:21,840
Speaker 7: Oh Honey, honya honey, Honey. When Lil came home, she

699
00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 7: just cried. I comforted her and we talked for a while.

700
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:28,520
Speaker 7: She knows Honey will probably ask her to be a bridesmaid,

701
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 7: but she just can't. I suggested she takes a final

702
00:36:31,680 --> 00:36:34,680
Speaker 7: approach to speak with Honey to say that she believes

703
00:36:34,680 --> 00:36:37,440
Speaker 7: this relationship will not work out, not only because of

704
00:36:37,480 --> 00:36:39,960
Speaker 7: what Pete did to her, but also because of his

705
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:43,279
Speaker 7: toxic traits towards Honey. She is worried that in the end,

706
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,120
Speaker 7: her bestie will get hurt and she'll have to take

707
00:36:45,160 --> 00:36:47,720
Speaker 7: care of her and rebuild her. She would prefer Honey

708
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 7: not be hurt in the first place. Ah, there's a

709
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:52,319
Speaker 7: little bit marshtorry left here.

710
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:55,840
Speaker 2: Unfortunately, there's not really much that you can do to

711
00:36:55,880 --> 00:36:59,239
Speaker 2: convince her. Lil can do to convince Honey that what

712
00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 2: she's doing is crazy because Honey is set in her ways,

713
00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 2: and hopefully she'll figure out that this is about relationship.

714
00:37:07,239 --> 00:37:11,080
Speaker 7: It's true, she's set. Yeah, So Lil thinks Honey has

715
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:13,760
Speaker 7: the irrational fear that she will not find anyone better

716
00:37:14,320 --> 00:37:16,920
Speaker 7: to build a family with. I told her Honey has

717
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:20,440
Speaker 7: plenty of options and time. It won't be easier if

718
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:22,960
Speaker 7: she is forty, a single mom and dealing with the

719
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:25,799
Speaker 7: trauma of a toxic marriage. So Reddit let us know.

720
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,200
Speaker 7: Should my girlfriend try to speak to her bestie again

721
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:30,920
Speaker 7: or just let it slip? Should I maybe talk to

722
00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:33,319
Speaker 7: her if she gets angry with me. I don't really care,

723
00:37:33,360 --> 00:37:35,480
Speaker 7: as I never got close to Honey anyway, since we

724
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,239
Speaker 7: don't do much together. I just want to support my

725
00:37:38,239 --> 00:37:41,000
Speaker 7: girlfriend in trying to save this special friendship. And that's

726
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:41,880
Speaker 7: the end of that story.

727
00:37:42,040 --> 00:37:44,400
Speaker 2: I mean, Lil could try and talk to her. I

728
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:48,399
Speaker 2: don't think Honey would listen. Umm, yeah, she could try

729
00:37:48,400 --> 00:37:50,799
Speaker 2: one more time and then maybe distance after that.

730
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 7: Can't hurt trying the third time or however many times.

731
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:56,920
Speaker 7: But if she's not going to receive it, she's not

732
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:57,600
Speaker 7: going to receive it.

733
00:37:57,680 --> 00:37:58,400
Speaker 2: Not much she can do.

734
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:01,400
Speaker 1: Hate It's sam og hosts here. We're gonna get back

735
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 1: to the stories. But here's three minutes of ads from

736
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:03,719
Speaker 1: our sponsors.

737
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:07,280
Speaker 5: My brother's wife is tricking him, and now the family

738
00:38:07,320 --> 00:38:11,080
Speaker 5: wants to expose her. You are liar. My twenty six

739
00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 5: female brother twenty seven male, has been married for about

740
00:38:14,040 --> 00:38:17,160
Speaker 5: two years now. A little backstory. I suppose my siblings

741
00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:19,480
Speaker 5: and I have always been a close knit group. There

742
00:38:19,480 --> 00:38:22,280
Speaker 5: are three girls and one boy as children. My brother

743
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,440
Speaker 5: got to see us every other weekend during the school

744
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:27,520
Speaker 5: year and two weeks on two weeks off during the summer.

745
00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:30,560
Speaker 5: My brother and I are very nerdy people. We play

746
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,719
Speaker 5: video games, watch anime or reid manga the works. By

747
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:36,680
Speaker 5: the way, this comes from user Championship still five nine

748
00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:38,320
Speaker 5: nine and if you want to submit your own stories,

749
00:38:38,360 --> 00:38:40,320
Speaker 5: go to the r slash Okay Storytime starre bredd It.

750
00:38:40,360 --> 00:38:43,200
Speaker 5: I'm ke On, I'm Sophia, I'm Carly, and we'll try

751
00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 5: to give our best advice. But we haven't experienced most

752
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:47,880
Speaker 5: of these situations, so if you have, let us know

753
00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 5: your take in the comments. It was always harder on

754
00:38:50,320 --> 00:38:52,879
Speaker 5: my brother to be nerdy because with girls it's seen

755
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,960
Speaker 5: as charming or hot, I guess, so as you can imagine,

756
00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:58,919
Speaker 5: I became very protective of him. He likes what he likes,

757
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:01,200
Speaker 5: he is who he is. That being said, my brother

758
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:04,080
Speaker 5: only really had one girlfriend as far as I can

759
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 5: remember while we were in school. After that ended, he

760
00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 5: didn't seem like he was interested in anyone, and everyone

761
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:11,760
Speaker 5: was okay with that. If he was happy, we were happy.

762
00:39:11,840 --> 00:39:14,880
Speaker 5: Then Christmas twenty twenty one, he announced he had a girlfriend.

763
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:17,040
Speaker 5: We were all super excited and happy for him. She

764
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 5: seemed to be on the same wave like as him,

765
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 5: and all was good. They apparently knew each other in

766
00:39:21,560 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 5: high school and happened to get back in touch randomly.

767
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:27,160
Speaker 5: We all eventually met her. Life was good. Over time,

768
00:39:27,320 --> 00:39:29,760
Speaker 5: our mom and one of our sisters started raising concerns

769
00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:32,680
Speaker 5: about this specific girl. I can't really remember what started

770
00:39:32,719 --> 00:39:35,279
Speaker 5: setting them off, but they really began to dislike her.

771
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:38,680
Speaker 5: I try to advocate for all my siblings, partners, and spouses,

772
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 5: so I didn't think too much of it, just figure

773
00:39:41,040 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 5: it was one of those no one will ever be

774
00:39:43,160 --> 00:39:45,680
Speaker 5: good enough for our brother situations when it came to

775
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:48,160
Speaker 5: those two. Then my brother started telling me insane stories

776
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 5: about this girlfriend now wife because they eloped. Uh, and

777
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:54,640
Speaker 5: the red flags started to raise for me. At first,

778
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:57,239
Speaker 5: it was little lies bright called for stories about one

779
00:39:57,239 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 5: of the million things that has supposedly happened to her,

780
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:02,799
Speaker 5: a childish stories that sounded like something people would make

781
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 5: up in middle school. One of the examples a previous

782
00:40:05,520 --> 00:40:08,120
Speaker 5: boyfriend allegedly messaged to my brother saying he'd never be

783
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:10,319
Speaker 5: good enough for her and that he'd better watch his

784
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:12,400
Speaker 5: back because he was willing to fight for the woman

785
00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 5: he loved. My brother said he'd win her back. My

786
00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,640
Speaker 5: brother showed me the screenshots of the conversation, but the

787
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:21,160
Speaker 5: writing style was exactly like hers. I didn't say anything

788
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:23,440
Speaker 5: because he was so proud of himself for standing up

789
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:25,759
Speaker 5: for his girlfriend and for himself. I didn't want to

790
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:28,239
Speaker 5: burst his bubble. Fast forward to twenty twenty three. This

791
00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:31,560
Speaker 5: girl was obviously lying about everything she could think of.

792
00:40:31,680 --> 00:40:34,480
Speaker 5: But they weren't cringey lies. They were big ones. My

793
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 5: brother messaged our family group chat in shambles, saying that

794
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,120
Speaker 5: his wife got a new job, her direct deposit got

795
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:43,839
Speaker 5: lost in cyberspace and never went into her account, so

796
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:46,359
Speaker 5: they didn't have money for rent. On top of that,

797
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:48,880
Speaker 5: the landlord was threatened to evict them because they had

798
00:40:48,920 --> 00:40:51,520
Speaker 5: two cats in a pet free apartment. His wife claimed

799
00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:53,719
Speaker 5: she got them both registered as service animals and that

800
00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 5: the landlord was breaking the law by threatening to punt

801
00:40:56,200 --> 00:40:58,680
Speaker 5: them out. They didn't have money for rent. Everything was

802
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,440
Speaker 5: crashing down around them. It eventually got so bad that

803
00:41:01,520 --> 00:41:03,279
Speaker 5: my brother had a mental break and went to see

804
00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:06,040
Speaker 5: a mental health professional. Oh, man, have the money for that. Yeah,

805
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:07,279
Speaker 5: you don't have money for rent, but you have the

806
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:09,440
Speaker 5: money for that. I ended up giving him money for

807
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:11,600
Speaker 5: rent just to get them buy until he at least

808
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:15,160
Speaker 5: got paid. After that, the whole oh, her check got lost,

809
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:18,880
Speaker 5: or oh, her job is refusing to pay her became

810
00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:20,440
Speaker 5: a lot more common.

811
00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:24,520
Speaker 2: If I were Ope's brother, I'd be like, Hey, let's

812
00:41:24,560 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 2: go freaking confront your job. Let's call the people and

813
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:29,879
Speaker 2: ask him why your check got lost in the mail?

814
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,200
Speaker 5: Yeah, or we need that money, or if it's like

815
00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 5: a direct deposit, can we see your account?

816
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:34,480
Speaker 2: Yeah?

817
00:41:34,560 --> 00:41:37,560
Speaker 5: When was the confirmation of get we never got this?

818
00:41:37,640 --> 00:41:39,880
Speaker 2: Why didn't it go through? Hey, job, we never got this?

819
00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:40,719
Speaker 2: Why didn't go through?

820
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,239
Speaker 5: I didn't contribute large amounts again, like the first time,

821
00:41:43,360 --> 00:41:45,080
Speaker 5: just twenty dollars here and there, so he could just

822
00:41:45,120 --> 00:41:47,600
Speaker 5: get lunch if he needed. Fast forward to now. My

823
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:49,799
Speaker 5: family and I recently found out that my brother and

824
00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 5: his wife aren't living together. She currently resides in a

825
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:56,640
Speaker 5: big city about two hours away from him. Why Because

826
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:58,400
Speaker 5: she got a new job and the trading was in

827
00:41:58,440 --> 00:42:00,919
Speaker 5: the city. After the training was over, she said she'd

828
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:02,759
Speaker 5: be working much closer to him and they could live

829
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:07,120
Speaker 5: together again. That was months ago. They still aren't living together.

830
00:42:07,239 --> 00:42:10,160
Speaker 5: She took their only car, So my brother has been

831
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 5: spending hundreds of dollars on ubers to go to work

832
00:42:13,080 --> 00:42:15,799
Speaker 5: every day. He pays to get groceries delivered to his

833
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:18,680
Speaker 5: house because he lives nowhere near a grocery store. He

834
00:42:18,719 --> 00:42:21,239
Speaker 5: occasionally asked me for fifteen dollars here and there to

835
00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:24,040
Speaker 5: get cooking supplies and always gives me twenty dollars back

836
00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 5: when he gets paid. The extra five dollars is a

837
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 5: thank you gift. What really pushed me to write this

838
00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:31,839
Speaker 5: post happened on Tuesday. Me, our oldest sister, and our

839
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:33,920
Speaker 5: brother were in a discord call. He said he was

840
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:36,200
Speaker 5: bummed because his wife was supposed to visit that weekend,

841
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:38,239
Speaker 5: but the new guy that they hired at her job

842
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:41,279
Speaker 5: is in the National Guard and got summoned, so she

843
00:42:41,440 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 5: had to work his shift for him. That was the

844
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 5: straw that broke the camel's back. I rallied the troops,

845
00:42:46,239 --> 00:42:48,239
Speaker 5: my sisters and my mom, and we started digging. The

846
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 5: job this woman claimed she works at is close on

847
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:53,239
Speaker 5: the weekends. I'm also under the impression that it's extremely

848
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:56,080
Speaker 5: rare or doesn't happen at all for someone in the

849
00:42:56,280 --> 00:42:59,840
Speaker 5: Guard to get someone like that. The money lies keep happening.

850
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,080
Speaker 5: There is always an excuse as to why she can't

851
00:43:02,120 --> 00:43:04,319
Speaker 5: send him money. One that really stood out was when

852
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:07,040
Speaker 5: she claimed she tried to wire him money via Western Union.

853
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:09,680
Speaker 5: The money got lost in cyberspace. It became a problem

854
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:11,839
Speaker 5: with her bank account, and she even claimed she called

855
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:15,680
Speaker 5: the branch manager and threatened legal action, and it kept happening.

856
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:17,560
Speaker 5: That an agreement that she would help with the rent

857
00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:19,920
Speaker 5: for the place my brother and their two cats still resided,

858
00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 5: but my brother is drowning financially because she never helps.

859
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:25,680
Speaker 5: One of the most recent excuses was that her friend

860
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:28,799
Speaker 5: got arrested for having expired tags on his car and

861
00:43:28,960 --> 00:43:31,279
Speaker 5: was too scared to tell his own wife, So my

862
00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 5: brother's wife claims she had to bail him out for

863
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:34,640
Speaker 5: six hundred dollars.

864
00:43:34,680 --> 00:43:37,319
Speaker 2: Please lag, this is lying about everything.

865
00:43:37,040 --> 00:43:39,880
Speaker 5: Without concrete evidence. This is what my family has found

866
00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:41,839
Speaker 5: so far. The place she told my brother she works

867
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 5: at is close on the weekends. She claims she has

868
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:46,240
Speaker 5: to stay in the big city because his town doesn't

869
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:49,080
Speaker 5: have LPN jobs. But I used to live there and

870
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 5: it's ninety percent hospitals, so that's nonsense. Her money is

871
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 5: always getting lost in cyberspace and there's never a way

872
00:43:57,120 --> 00:43:59,520
Speaker 5: to recover it. Our sister tried to find their marriage

873
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:02,759
Speaker 5: record license online but has been able to isn't that

874
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,759
Speaker 5: public record. If it's not there, does that mean they're

875
00:44:05,760 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 5: not legally married. She also makes fake social media accounts

876
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 5: of alleged exes and pesters my brother to make herself

877
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:14,920
Speaker 5: seem more desirable. She has completely abandoned him and is

878
00:44:15,160 --> 00:44:17,520
Speaker 5: for sure leading him on. My brother has been sending

879
00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:20,160
Speaker 5: her money on Venmo, but it's never returned. My sister

880
00:44:20,239 --> 00:44:22,920
Speaker 5: reached out to people from their high school and everyone

881
00:44:23,040 --> 00:44:26,240
Speaker 5: said the same thing. She's a major liar.

882
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:28,560
Speaker 2: Oh, you're married to a liar.

883
00:44:28,680 --> 00:44:30,600
Speaker 5: Brother, I don't think you've like you're married.

884
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 2: You might not even be married to a liar. You

885
00:44:32,400 --> 00:44:33,399
Speaker 2: might just be dating a liar.

886
00:44:33,560 --> 00:44:35,319
Speaker 5: We all want to come together and tell her brother

887
00:44:35,400 --> 00:44:37,799
Speaker 5: that he's being tricked. He's just so in love with her.

888
00:44:37,840 --> 00:44:39,879
Speaker 5: The only time I've ever seen him close to talking

889
00:44:39,920 --> 00:44:42,839
Speaker 5: truthfully about their relationship was when he was having a

890
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:46,439
Speaker 5: really bad day and extremely frustrated. But other than that,

891
00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:49,120
Speaker 5: if this woman has hung the moon and stars by hand,

892
00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:51,760
Speaker 5: this is his first serious relationship, and he's so proud

893
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:53,919
Speaker 5: and happy to have a wife. I'm worried he'll shut

894
00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:56,160
Speaker 5: us out or shut down. I've tried to gently talk

895
00:44:56,160 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 5: to him about the patterns and red flags before, but

896
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:01,720
Speaker 5: all he says is she's He's just a really unlucky person.

897
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:03,919
Speaker 5: So would I be the a hole if I told

898
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:06,000
Speaker 5: my brother that his wife is tricking him and that

899
00:45:06,040 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 5: he needs to start figuring things out. Im eight hours

900
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:10,560
Speaker 5: away from him, but I'm literally ready to take him.

901
00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:12,759
Speaker 5: And if this all comes to a head and they

902
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:15,239
Speaker 5: separate and he needs a place to stay, could there

903
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:18,120
Speaker 5: be any truth to this? What do I do? And

904
00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:20,799
Speaker 5: we have an update? This morning my brother updated the

905
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:23,080
Speaker 5: group chat to say his coworkers surprised him with a

906
00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:25,919
Speaker 5: GoFundMe for him to get his own car and they've

907
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:30,160
Speaker 5: raised almost two thousand dollars. Yah shout out to those people.

908
00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:32,800
Speaker 5: While I'm happy he apparently has the best coworkers in

909
00:45:32,840 --> 00:45:35,680
Speaker 5: the world, it makes me so mad that this even

910
00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:37,839
Speaker 5: has to happen in the first place. I'm worried he'll

911
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:39,440
Speaker 5: send some of that money to his wife with the

912
00:45:39,480 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 5: sister that lives closest to him says that when he

913
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:43,879
Speaker 5: receives the money, she'll go with him to help pick

914
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:45,440
Speaker 5: out a car and to see if he has the

915
00:45:45,520 --> 00:45:48,759
Speaker 5: full amount. My brother's wedding anniversary is this weekend and

916
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:51,000
Speaker 5: we're all waiting to see if wife is going to

917
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 5: bail on him and say she has to work. Our

918
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:55,759
Speaker 5: sister is also getting married in a few weeks, but

919
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:58,919
Speaker 5: says that after her wedding's done, she's more than willing

920
00:45:59,000 --> 00:46:00,520
Speaker 5: to take our brother up to the city on a

921
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:04,000
Speaker 5: weekend to surprise his wife for his birthday slash their

922
00:46:04,040 --> 00:46:06,840
Speaker 5: wedding anniversary. That's all for now. We'll continue to update

923
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:10,560
Speaker 5: update too. Today is their anniversary. She was supposed to

924
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:12,960
Speaker 5: come down. She didn't. Her excuse is that she has

925
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:15,759
Speaker 5: a broken toe on her driving foot and also went

926
00:46:15,800 --> 00:46:18,680
Speaker 5: to urgent care because her stomach hurt. She has gastro

927
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,520
Speaker 5: parisis and had to go to an actual emergency room,

928
00:46:21,560 --> 00:46:22,560
Speaker 5: so she can't come down.

929
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:24,759
Speaker 2: I would literally be like, tax me a picture, tax

930
00:46:24,840 --> 00:46:26,439
Speaker 2: me a picture of you in the emergency room.

931
00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 5: I'd be like, right now, okay, cool, I'm coming up.

932
00:46:29,400 --> 00:46:30,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm coming to you.

933
00:46:31,040 --> 00:46:34,800
Speaker 5: She is also overjoyed at knowing about the two thousand

934
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:37,000
Speaker 5: dollars that has been raised for my brother and seems

935
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:40,000
Speaker 5: to believe that she'll get the new car once it's purchased,

936
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:41,960
Speaker 5: and that my brother will get the car she took

937
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:45,040
Speaker 5: to the big city. This was what made the damn break.

938
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:48,160
Speaker 5: Our mom called him and told him everything. He now

939
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:50,520
Speaker 5: knows what we all feel. Mom said, he didn't really

940
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:52,680
Speaker 5: say much except try to bring up the fact that

941
00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:55,080
Speaker 5: this girl had a bad childhood. Did she lie about

942
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:58,000
Speaker 5: that too? Mom said, so did you and your sisters.

943
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:00,719
Speaker 5: But none of you all lie about little everything the

944
00:47:00,760 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 5: way this girl does. She brought up the bank account

945
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:06,120
Speaker 5: and money issues, so they always having an excuse and

946
00:47:06,320 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 5: job thing. All was brought to the table. After that,

947
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:11,560
Speaker 5: my brother just kind of sat there and listened, but

948
00:47:11,680 --> 00:47:15,080
Speaker 5: he didn't respond much. Then Mom called his wife and

949
00:47:15,120 --> 00:47:17,279
Speaker 5: told her to call her. A call wasn't made, but

950
00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:19,680
Speaker 5: the wife did tell brother that our mom reached out

951
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,240
Speaker 5: to her. My brother texted our mom and said, please

952
00:47:22,480 --> 00:47:24,920
Speaker 5: let me try to handle this and figure out everything.

953
00:47:25,120 --> 00:47:27,200
Speaker 5: Mom agreed to back off for the time being. We

954
00:47:27,280 --> 00:47:29,680
Speaker 5: also did find out that they are for sure married,

955
00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:32,120
Speaker 5: so that's a bummer. We're hoping to convince him and

956
00:47:32,239 --> 00:47:34,200
Speaker 5: my brother's dad to take the money and put the

957
00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:37,400
Speaker 5: new car in his name so if a divorce happens,

958
00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:39,680
Speaker 5: the wife can't take it in the split. It hurts

959
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:41,960
Speaker 5: to know. My brother was already upset about his wife

960
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 5: not being able to come down for their anniversary and

961
00:47:44,160 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 5: then he had a truth bomb dumped on him all

962
00:47:46,200 --> 00:47:50,160
Speaker 5: in the same day. Happy Birthday, Happy anniversary. Rough, But

963
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:52,920
Speaker 5: I'm glad a conversation has happened and that's the end

964
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:53,360
Speaker 5: of the story.

965
00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:55,520
Speaker 2: Good luck, hope, I really hope that your brother figures

966
00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:58,400
Speaker 2: this out gets money back. Man, she's taking all his money.

967
00:47:59,160 --> 00:48:03,160
Speaker 8: I victim my sister before surgery because I've had enough.

968
00:48:03,239 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 5: Get out of it.

969
00:48:04,280 --> 00:48:08,560
Speaker 8: Trigger warning mentions some substances. My sixty year old sister

970
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:11,840
Speaker 8: moved in with me sixty five after my mother passed away.

971
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,480
Speaker 8: My little sister has been unemployed for the past twenty

972
00:48:15,600 --> 00:48:19,080
Speaker 8: years or so. When she left her relationship, she moved

973
00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:22,000
Speaker 8: in with my oldest sister, and after a few years

974
00:48:22,040 --> 00:48:24,839
Speaker 8: she bounced around to various family members who all ended

975
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:28,719
Speaker 8: up frustrated with her lack of motivation, sleeping all day,

976
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:33,560
Speaker 8: playing computers and games all night. By the way, this

977
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:36,600
Speaker 8: comes from Artistic Quiet eighty five forty five. And if

978
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:38,000
Speaker 8: you were to speaking old stories, go to the r

979
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:40,560
Speaker 8: slash Okay story. I'm Subreddit, I'm Riley.

980
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:41,880
Speaker 5: And I'm Keon, I'm Carly.

981
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:43,799
Speaker 8: Before we get to the story, we're going to try

982
00:48:43,800 --> 00:48:46,920
Speaker 8: to give our best advice, but we haven't experienced most

983
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:49,840
Speaker 8: of these situations. If you have, please comment down below

984
00:48:49,880 --> 00:48:51,800
Speaker 8: and we would love for you to share that. Until

985
00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:55,040
Speaker 8: my mom took her in, this was around twenty eighteen

986
00:48:55,360 --> 00:48:58,640
Speaker 8: and through time of the BID, my mom was living

987
00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:02,000
Speaker 8: in a senior living apartment and basically hid my sister

988
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:04,800
Speaker 8: in her apartment because the rules were that she couldn't

989
00:49:04,840 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 8: have anyone living with her. This went on for several

990
00:49:07,680 --> 00:49:10,319
Speaker 8: years until my mom passed away in twenty twenty three.

991
00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:13,680
Speaker 8: Everyone decided that I needed to take my sister in

992
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:16,560
Speaker 8: after my mom's passing, since I was the only one

993
00:49:16,600 --> 00:49:19,920
Speaker 8: who had the space. I didn't want to, but felt

994
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:22,080
Speaker 8: I owed her at least a few months after she

995
00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:24,800
Speaker 8: cared for our mother during the last couple of years

996
00:49:24,840 --> 00:49:26,840
Speaker 8: of her life. I've known for several years that my

997
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:31,719
Speaker 8: sister is added to the math spelled wrong, and she

998
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:35,160
Speaker 8: hides it pretty well. She always looks sober and presents

999
00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:39,080
Speaker 8: someone who is not getting into high But for years,

1000
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:41,759
Speaker 8: even before she was with her ex, I bailed her

1001
00:49:41,760 --> 00:49:45,240
Speaker 8: out financially several times and even a couple of times

1002
00:49:45,360 --> 00:49:48,560
Speaker 8: from jail to make sure my suspicions were right. I

1003
00:49:48,640 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 8: snooped in her room and found a small zipper bag

1004
00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:56,400
Speaker 8: with paraphomilia and several rocks. I even took a picture

1005
00:49:56,440 --> 00:49:59,440
Speaker 8: to prevent gas slighting and perhaps later not trusting what

1006
00:49:59,520 --> 00:50:01,880
Speaker 8: I saw. My experience has been that she is in

1007
00:50:01,920 --> 00:50:04,640
Speaker 8: my life when she needs me, when she doesn't, she

1008
00:50:04,719 --> 00:50:07,080
Speaker 8: won't take my calls. So a big reason why I

1009
00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:09,680
Speaker 8: didn't want to be her savior was that I just

1010
00:50:09,719 --> 00:50:13,759
Speaker 8: didn't have any faith in her or our relationships as siblings.

1011
00:50:13,800 --> 00:50:16,279
Speaker 8: I was worried that she would be parking herself in

1012
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:19,319
Speaker 8: my life and that it would be impossible to get

1013
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:24,160
Speaker 8: rid of her. My sister and I are polar opposites politically, financially,

1014
00:50:24,239 --> 00:50:27,040
Speaker 8: et cetera. I've worked hard in my life to ensure

1015
00:50:27,080 --> 00:50:31,000
Speaker 8: that I'm financially safe during my old age. I'm a vegan,

1016
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:37,320
Speaker 8: a Saffiic, very emotionally conscious. I am also a zero waster.

1017
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:41,360
Speaker 8: I've spent a significant amount of money putting away in

1018
00:50:41,480 --> 00:50:46,640
Speaker 8: gray water systems, rain garden, solar panels, compost bins, drought

1019
00:50:46,719 --> 00:50:50,319
Speaker 8: tolerant native landscapes, et cetera. I also spent several years

1020
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,600
Speaker 8: of getting rid of material possessions after my partner and

1021
00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:57,799
Speaker 8: several family members passed away. We kept having to deal

1022
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,120
Speaker 8: with everyone's stuff, and I worked hard giving it all away.

1023
00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:03,920
Speaker 8: It was time for me to finally live a lifestyle

1024
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:07,719
Speaker 8: that I've dreamed of, simple, peaceful, and finally take care

1025
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:10,439
Speaker 8: of me. It took money and a lot of work

1026
00:51:10,520 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 8: to achieve my vision. Then my sister moved in. I

1027
00:51:13,520 --> 00:51:17,200
Speaker 8: explained my lifestyle to her and that she would have

1028
00:51:17,320 --> 00:51:18,160
Speaker 8: to abide by it.

1029
00:51:18,239 --> 00:51:18,840
Speaker 2: She agreed.

1030
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:24,480
Speaker 8: However, immediately she violated every single agreement and started gaslighting

1031
00:51:24,480 --> 00:51:27,319
Speaker 8: me and acting like she didn't understand what I was

1032
00:51:27,400 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 8: talking about. She was a shopper and would spend all

1033
00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 8: the welfare check on dollar store junk and thrift shop clothing.

1034
00:51:34,360 --> 00:51:36,319
Speaker 8: I kept asking her not to buy things for me,

1035
00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:39,480
Speaker 8: my pet, or the house, but she kept on doing it.

1036
00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:43,520
Speaker 8: Food bowls, scratching posts, cat and dog tooys, was several

1037
00:51:43,600 --> 00:51:46,719
Speaker 8: things for the house. Things I had gotten rid of

1038
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:49,719
Speaker 8: would come back to my life. It was so frustrating,

1039
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:51,880
Speaker 8: but I could only make her understand that I've worked

1040
00:51:51,920 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 8: so hard to get to the point that I had

1041
00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:57,319
Speaker 8: all I needed and didn't want more stuff, But she

1042
00:51:57,719 --> 00:52:01,320
Speaker 8: wouldn't hear me. She was also bringing home things like produce,

1043
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:04,600
Speaker 8: plastic bags and grocery bags. Because she couldn't be bothered

1044
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:09,000
Speaker 8: to use the reusable bags I provided, she purchased frozen

1045
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 8: dinners or groceries and plastic containers and wouldn't even bother

1046
00:52:13,160 --> 00:52:16,800
Speaker 8: to recycle the containers. Cooking with something else she didn't enjoy.

1047
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:20,920
Speaker 8: She said, while I use reusable produce and shopping bags,

1048
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 8: avoid plastic, shop at farmers' markets and refilled stores, and

1049
00:52:25,200 --> 00:52:28,240
Speaker 8: cook all my food and my dog's food. She didn't

1050
00:52:28,239 --> 00:52:31,000
Speaker 8: even try to assimulate. When she first moved in, I

1051
00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:33,480
Speaker 8: found out that my car was burning oil and the

1052
00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:35,920
Speaker 8: cost to repair the issue was higher than the value

1053
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:38,359
Speaker 8: of the car, so I decided to buy a new

1054
00:52:38,400 --> 00:52:41,560
Speaker 8: car and offer my old car to her. I explained

1055
00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:45,000
Speaker 8: that it was a temporary transportation solution because since the

1056
00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:48,000
Speaker 8: car was on his last legs and would not last

1057
00:52:48,080 --> 00:52:50,959
Speaker 8: very long. I also added her to my phone plan

1058
00:52:51,080 --> 00:52:54,040
Speaker 8: and purchased a phone for her. I explained that this

1059
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:57,080
Speaker 8: was a handoff, not a permanent solution. She had to

1060
00:52:57,120 --> 00:52:59,319
Speaker 8: take it from there. She was spending hours in the

1061
00:52:59,360 --> 00:53:03,080
Speaker 8: shower and using a ridiculous amount of water washing dishes.

1062
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:06,160
Speaker 8: My water and power bills went up from five years

1063
00:53:06,480 --> 00:53:09,480
Speaker 8: of a credit balance because of my solar panels and

1064
00:53:09,560 --> 00:53:13,479
Speaker 8: all my water and electricity savings to seven hundred every

1065
00:53:13,480 --> 00:53:16,200
Speaker 8: two months. That's actually seven hundred dollars every two months.

1066
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:19,239
Speaker 5: She's doing in the shower to jump it up to

1067
00:53:19,360 --> 00:53:21,359
Speaker 5: that much Like, yeah, you knew it was gonna jump

1068
00:53:21,440 --> 00:53:23,759
Speaker 5: up a little bit, But is she like practicing a

1069
00:53:23,880 --> 00:53:25,120
Speaker 5: dance routine? Every time?

1070
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:25,960
Speaker 2: Confused?

1071
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 8: When I would bring it up to her, she would

1072
00:53:27,680 --> 00:53:30,640
Speaker 8: say that everyone is paying more now. I encourage her

1073
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:34,120
Speaker 8: repeatedly to get a job. I tried so many strategies,

1074
00:53:34,200 --> 00:53:37,520
Speaker 8: such as requiring weekly updates, and every time I asked

1075
00:53:37,520 --> 00:53:39,640
Speaker 8: her where she was at, she would tell me that

1076
00:53:39,760 --> 00:53:42,520
Speaker 8: she was looking. After six months, I told her she

1077
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 8: had until February to find a new place to live.

1078
00:53:45,200 --> 00:53:47,279
Speaker 8: At one point, I asked her what had happened to

1079
00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:50,120
Speaker 8: her job search, and she said she had until February.

1080
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:52,600
Speaker 8: I couldn't believe her and pointed out she had to

1081
00:53:52,600 --> 00:53:56,080
Speaker 8: get a job, save money for rent, et cetera. Around December,

1082
00:53:56,320 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 8: I explained that I was holding her to the February date.

1083
00:54:00,239 --> 00:54:03,400
Speaker 5: Way too nice and convenient for her if she was

1084
00:54:03,440 --> 00:54:05,759
Speaker 5: working on it and actually helping, and I get it

1085
00:54:05,880 --> 00:54:07,760
Speaker 5: you're like, all right, it's it's a little bit harder

1086
00:54:07,760 --> 00:54:10,480
Speaker 5: for you. Life's hard. You shouldn't be giving her everything

1087
00:54:10,560 --> 00:54:11,600
Speaker 5: on like a silver platter.

1088
00:54:11,719 --> 00:54:14,120
Speaker 8: She then announce she had to have surgery on her

1089
00:54:14,160 --> 00:54:17,640
Speaker 8: bunion and that she would need a little longer. I

1090
00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:20,560
Speaker 8: agreed to allow her longer time so she would have

1091
00:54:20,560 --> 00:54:22,879
Speaker 8: the surgery. That it was months of her lying in bed.

1092
00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 8: After the surgery, as soon as she started to walk,

1093
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:28,000
Speaker 8: I was starting to push for her to get a job.

1094
00:54:28,160 --> 00:54:31,440
Speaker 8: She pretended that she was looking. She updated her resume,

1095
00:54:31,640 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 8: went to the unemployment office, and spoke to a counselor

1096
00:54:34,920 --> 00:54:37,280
Speaker 8: about getting into a training program.

1097
00:54:37,360 --> 00:54:38,080
Speaker 2: I was hopeful.

1098
00:54:38,239 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 8: After a few weeks, I asked for an update. She

1099
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:44,320
Speaker 8: announced that she was having the surgery on the other foot. Yay,

1100
00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:47,520
Speaker 8: because people have two bunions. As much she liked to work,

1101
00:54:47,600 --> 00:54:50,040
Speaker 8: she just couldn't look for work right now. She said

1102
00:54:50,160 --> 00:54:52,920
Speaker 8: that she was doing this so she could be healed

1103
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:55,840
Speaker 8: and able to work. I was so upset, but honestly,

1104
00:54:55,840 --> 00:54:57,759
Speaker 8: it felt like I would just have to deal with

1105
00:54:57,800 --> 00:55:00,480
Speaker 8: it for another six months. At one point LI last year,

1106
00:55:00,760 --> 00:55:03,200
Speaker 8: after I spent about eight hundred dollars on the car,

1107
00:55:03,320 --> 00:55:06,640
Speaker 8: I gave her tune up and suspension work. I told

1108
00:55:06,680 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 8: her that would be the last time I spent any

1109
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:13,480
Speaker 8: money on that car. Well, registration time came and I

1110
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:15,960
Speaker 8: handed her the envelope and told her she needed to

1111
00:55:15,960 --> 00:55:18,400
Speaker 8: pay for it. She took it and I didn't hear

1112
00:55:18,760 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 8: another thing about it. While my sister lived with me

1113
00:55:21,239 --> 00:55:23,440
Speaker 8: for two and a half years, rent free. To be fair,

1114
00:55:23,680 --> 00:55:25,840
Speaker 8: she did help me with my animals and did a

1115
00:55:25,880 --> 00:55:27,920
Speaker 8: little bit of housework when she felt like it. I

1116
00:55:28,040 --> 00:55:31,440
Speaker 8: still work, and it was a comfort to have someone

1117
00:55:31,440 --> 00:55:33,600
Speaker 8: at home when I was at work. Took my dogs

1118
00:55:33,640 --> 00:55:37,800
Speaker 8: in for grooming appointments, and was generally home when cable

1119
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:41,520
Speaker 8: repair appointments came, so I didn't need to take time off.

1120
00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:44,480
Speaker 8: She also did things like paint my room and mended

1121
00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:46,960
Speaker 8: a few clothing items I asked her to fix for

1122
00:55:47,040 --> 00:55:49,800
Speaker 8: me over the course of like six months a year.

1123
00:55:49,920 --> 00:55:53,080
Speaker 8: This isn't enough like doing a few chores and favors

1124
00:55:53,280 --> 00:55:55,360
Speaker 8: come on. Recently, I went to get something out of

1125
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:57,920
Speaker 8: her car and noticed that the license had expired a

1126
00:55:57,960 --> 00:56:01,160
Speaker 8: few months back, and I became furious. I asked her

1127
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:03,440
Speaker 8: about it, and she said she was waiting to receive

1128
00:56:03,480 --> 00:56:06,200
Speaker 8: her welfare check to pay it. I told her that

1129
00:56:06,360 --> 00:56:09,040
Speaker 8: I was thinking of donating the car. She dared me

1130
00:56:09,120 --> 00:56:10,920
Speaker 8: to go to ahead. We started to fight. I told

1131
00:56:10,960 --> 00:56:13,520
Speaker 8: her I didn't want children on purpose, and here I

1132
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:15,799
Speaker 8: was dealing with a sixty year old baby. I asked

1133
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:17,920
Speaker 8: why I had to have a child living with me

1134
00:56:18,080 --> 00:56:20,439
Speaker 8: against my will and told her she needed to get out.

1135
00:56:20,520 --> 00:56:22,759
Speaker 8: She said she was sick of me too. I think

1136
00:56:22,880 --> 00:56:25,480
Speaker 8: I said many her ful things. I lost control and

1137
00:56:25,520 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 8: became verbally mean to her. I told her I knew

1138
00:56:28,160 --> 00:56:30,880
Speaker 8: I was being mean and that I would only get worse,

1139
00:56:30,960 --> 00:56:33,359
Speaker 8: and yelled at her to get out, get out. About

1140
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:35,839
Speaker 8: an hour later, my oldest sister came to get her.

1141
00:56:36,080 --> 00:56:39,480
Speaker 8: She also lives in a senior apartment and can't have

1142
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:42,000
Speaker 8: anyone living with her. She's now had the surgery and

1143
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:44,520
Speaker 8: has been gone for a couple of weeks. I feel

1144
00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:47,000
Speaker 8: bearable about all the things I said to her. I

1145
00:56:47,040 --> 00:56:49,760
Speaker 8: did apologize the next day. I told her I didn't

1146
00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:52,160
Speaker 8: know what came over me, and that she should come

1147
00:56:52,160 --> 00:56:54,720
Speaker 8: home if she wanted to. But she doesn't want anything

1148
00:56:54,719 --> 00:56:56,200
Speaker 8: to do with me right now. Do you think this

1149
00:56:56,239 --> 00:56:57,520
Speaker 8: is a signed to God?

1150
00:56:57,719 --> 00:57:00,439
Speaker 5: Yeah? I mean you told her the truth been fed

1151
00:57:00,520 --> 00:57:02,719
Speaker 5: up with her, sorry, like you should have done this

1152
00:57:02,760 --> 00:57:05,800
Speaker 5: a long time ago, and it was you kept sweeping

1153
00:57:05,840 --> 00:57:07,719
Speaker 5: it under the rug kind of thing, like it's gonna happen,

1154
00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:10,279
Speaker 5: and you kept believing that was gonna happen. And now

1155
00:57:10,320 --> 00:57:12,880
Speaker 5: there's a huge pile of mess under that rug.

1156
00:57:13,000 --> 00:57:15,880
Speaker 8: Honestly, after the two weeks, I feel so much better

1157
00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:18,120
Speaker 8: that she is gone and I'm not spending my day

1158
00:57:18,240 --> 00:57:22,040
Speaker 8: mentally criticizing her or mentally arguing with her, and frankly

1159
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:24,320
Speaker 8: prefer this she doesn't come back. But I still feel

1160
00:57:24,360 --> 00:57:26,920
Speaker 8: like a big knucklehead about how I handle the situation.

1161
00:57:27,160 --> 00:57:29,960
Speaker 8: As usual, I let people walk all over my boundaries

1162
00:57:30,120 --> 00:57:32,720
Speaker 8: and at some point I deal with it with rage.

1163
00:57:32,880 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 8: Another thing is that all her stuff is here, her food,

1164
00:57:35,880 --> 00:57:38,200
Speaker 8: her room packed to the gills with all her things

1165
00:57:38,200 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 8: that she doesn't want to do with now, so it's

1166
00:57:40,360 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 8: up to me to deal with all their stuff. I

1167
00:57:41,680 --> 00:57:44,160
Speaker 8: know I'm the a hole here, but how would you

1168
00:57:44,280 --> 00:57:46,680
Speaker 8: have dealt with this? You know you may she's the

1169
00:57:46,720 --> 00:57:47,040
Speaker 8: a hole.

1170
00:57:47,720 --> 00:57:49,880
Speaker 5: You are the ahole to yourself, like you allowed this

1171
00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:52,800
Speaker 5: to all happen. Ope, I'm sorry, Yes, I do agree

1172
00:57:52,840 --> 00:57:54,560
Speaker 5: with You're an a hole. You weren't an a hole

1173
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:56,720
Speaker 5: to your sister. You were an a hole to yourself.

1174
00:57:56,760 --> 00:57:59,440
Speaker 5: You should have, you know, put your foot down way sooner.

1175
00:57:59,720 --> 00:58:03,200
Speaker 8: Yeah, yes, yes, yes, Hey, it's johny og host here.

1176
00:58:03,240 --> 00:58:04,600
Speaker 7: We're gonna get back to the stories, but here's a

1177
00:58:04,640 --> 00:58:06,480
Speaker 7: quick three minute break of ass from our sponsors.

1178
00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:10,120
Speaker 5: My sister had a meltdown at my workplace, so I

1179
00:58:10,200 --> 00:58:10,880
Speaker 5: told her to leave.

1180
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 2: I hope you don't work at the nuclear plant.

1181
00:58:13,360 --> 00:58:15,360
Speaker 5: I female twenty six, was due to move into my

1182
00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:18,640
Speaker 5: student accommodation this weekend. I also work in a hotel

1183
00:58:18,760 --> 00:58:21,400
Speaker 5: in the city where my university is, and my sister's

1184
00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:23,240
Speaker 5: boyfriend lives here too. She asked me to book a

1185
00:58:23,320 --> 00:58:26,880
Speaker 5: hotel room for her on the staff rate. It's way cheaper,

1186
00:58:27,280 --> 00:58:28,880
Speaker 5: and I told her I would. By the way, this

1187
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:31,240
Speaker 5: comes from user zya Topia, and if you want to

1188
00:58:31,240 --> 00:58:33,240
Speaker 5: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay,

1189
00:58:33,240 --> 00:58:36,680
Speaker 5: sorry time subreddit. I'm ke On, I'm Dakota, I'm Carly.

1190
00:58:36,920 --> 00:58:38,760
Speaker 5: We'll try to give our best advice, but we haven't

1191
00:58:38,760 --> 00:58:41,800
Speaker 5: experienced most of these situations, so if you have, please

1192
00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:43,840
Speaker 5: let us know in the comments and give us your take.

1193
00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:46,240
Speaker 5: But if the room is booked under my name, I'm

1194
00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:48,440
Speaker 5: the one who has to check in, as the hotel

1195
00:58:48,480 --> 00:58:51,240
Speaker 5: is strict about the specific policy. Normally, even if the

1196
00:58:51,240 --> 00:58:53,360
Speaker 5: guest staying at the hotel calls us and tells us

1197
00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:55,480
Speaker 5: they would like their friend or family to check in

1198
00:58:55,520 --> 00:58:59,480
Speaker 5: for them, we deny this. It's not allowed. Also, because

1199
00:58:59,520 --> 00:59:01,480
Speaker 5: I chose used to book the staff rate and not

1200
00:59:01,600 --> 00:59:03,560
Speaker 5: friends at family rate, I have to be the one

1201
00:59:03,600 --> 00:59:06,840
Speaker 5: spending the night in the hotel. She can also stay

1202
00:59:06,880 --> 00:59:09,200
Speaker 5: there as my plus one. We booked for two nights,

1203
00:59:09,320 --> 00:59:11,880
Speaker 5: Friday night to Sunday morning. I was due to move

1204
00:59:11,920 --> 00:59:14,440
Speaker 5: in on Saturday. I decided on Friday night that I'd

1205
00:59:14,480 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 5: stay with my friend as she has a car and

1206
00:59:16,880 --> 00:59:18,800
Speaker 5: could help me move stuff. I told my sister I

1207
00:59:18,840 --> 00:59:21,680
Speaker 5: would speak to my friends on reception and explain that

1208
00:59:21,720 --> 00:59:23,440
Speaker 5: I was busy with the move. So I'd arrived at

1209
00:59:23,440 --> 00:59:26,240
Speaker 5: the hotel on Saturday after my move was completed and

1210
00:59:26,440 --> 00:59:29,040
Speaker 5: sneak out eventually to stay at my student accommodation. Since

1211
00:59:29,080 --> 00:59:31,920
Speaker 5: my sister was helping me with the move, she would

1212
00:59:31,920 --> 00:59:34,520
Speaker 5: have to spend Friday night alone. Because I'm friends with

1213
00:59:34,560 --> 00:59:37,120
Speaker 5: the staff, they allowed this as my sister checked in

1214
00:59:37,480 --> 00:59:40,600
Speaker 5: after my manager had clocked out. So Friday I stayed

1215
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:43,160
Speaker 5: with my friend, and on Saturday, I completed the move.

1216
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:45,520
Speaker 5: Although my sister was supposed to help me with my move,

1217
00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:48,240
Speaker 5: the reason she'd asked to have the hotel booked initially

1218
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:50,680
Speaker 5: was because it was her birthday this week. She wanted

1219
00:59:50,680 --> 00:59:52,920
Speaker 5: to celebrate with some mutual friends and spend time at

1220
00:59:52,920 --> 00:59:55,880
Speaker 5: the hotel with her boyfriend. Saturday morning, when I went

1221
00:59:55,920 --> 00:59:58,520
Speaker 5: to my student accommodation, I can check in as there

1222
00:59:58,600 --> 01:00:01,640
Speaker 5: was some delay with my sfe it was their fault,

1223
01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:04,479
Speaker 5: not mine. I messaged my sister, who was getting ready

1224
01:00:04,520 --> 01:00:06,640
Speaker 5: to go out with her friends. Then went shopping with

1225
01:00:06,680 --> 01:00:09,720
Speaker 5: my friend, who was again helping me move, and her

1226
01:00:09,720 --> 01:00:11,680
Speaker 5: mother for a wedding they are attending in a month.

1227
01:00:11,800 --> 01:00:13,720
Speaker 5: The road with all the wedding shops in the city

1228
01:00:13,840 --> 01:00:17,000
Speaker 5: is busy and has no service. I was unable to

1229
01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:19,640
Speaker 5: update my sister and she was unable to reach me

1230
01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:21,920
Speaker 5: by the time we finished shopping. I asked my friend

1231
01:00:21,960 --> 01:00:23,760
Speaker 5: to drop me at the hotel. I would then go

1232
01:00:23,800 --> 01:00:26,560
Speaker 5: to the accommodation tomorrow morning, it's a five minute walk

1233
01:00:26,560 --> 01:00:28,760
Speaker 5: from the hotel, and see if I can sort something out.

1234
01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:30,720
Speaker 5: She dropped me off at the hotel, but I left

1235
01:00:30,720 --> 01:00:33,240
Speaker 5: my phone in her car in the process. I collected

1236
01:00:33,240 --> 01:00:35,600
Speaker 5: the room key from reception and messaged my sister from

1237
01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:38,240
Speaker 5: my iPad, telling her I was at the hotel and

1238
01:00:38,320 --> 01:00:40,280
Speaker 5: didn't know what to do or where to go. She

1239
01:00:40,360 --> 01:00:43,320
Speaker 5: was out with her friends celebrating and immediately messaged me

1240
01:00:43,400 --> 01:00:47,240
Speaker 5: back super defensive, saying I was invading her personal space

1241
01:00:47,360 --> 01:00:51,400
Speaker 5: with her boyfriend and ruining her birthday by dumping my

1242
01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:52,880
Speaker 5: problems onto her girl.

1243
01:00:53,000 --> 01:00:55,760
Speaker 7: Be so for real, It's that was not that much.

1244
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:58,720
Speaker 7: That was a simple clarification, right, Am I wrong in that?

1245
01:00:58,880 --> 01:01:02,040
Speaker 5: Now you're in again? Hey, whose job is this? Whose

1246
01:01:02,120 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 5: hotel room is it under? Who works here? Who's hooking

1247
01:01:04,800 --> 01:01:06,360
Speaker 5: you up? Right now? The least you can do is

1248
01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:09,000
Speaker 5: give me just a little bit of communication. I reminded

1249
01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:12,040
Speaker 5: her several times about our agreement before that the hostel

1250
01:01:12,200 --> 01:01:14,840
Speaker 5: staff had to watch me check in so it wouldn't

1251
01:01:14,880 --> 01:01:17,760
Speaker 5: reflect badly when I returned to work. But my sister

1252
01:01:17,920 --> 01:01:21,480
Speaker 5: was thinking only about her weekend and her ruined plans,

1253
01:01:21,800 --> 01:01:24,400
Speaker 5: so she wanted me to get out of the room immediately.

1254
01:01:24,480 --> 01:01:26,960
Speaker 5: This is where I lost my temper because she was

1255
01:01:26,960 --> 01:01:29,160
Speaker 5: not being understanding at all. I cussed her out and

1256
01:01:29,200 --> 01:01:30,880
Speaker 5: told her if she wanted to spend quality time with

1257
01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:34,160
Speaker 5: her boyfriend so badly. They can book another place and

1258
01:01:34,200 --> 01:01:36,320
Speaker 5: I return the money she lost for not staying in

1259
01:01:36,320 --> 01:01:38,760
Speaker 5: the room for one night. We decided to talk when

1260
01:01:38,800 --> 01:01:41,360
Speaker 5: she was done with dinner. I smoked, chilled out and

1261
01:01:41,480 --> 01:01:43,520
Speaker 5: was starting to see her side. I was looking to

1262
01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 5: book another alternative place for myself after she returned. When

1263
01:01:46,680 --> 01:01:49,080
Speaker 5: she came back, she brought two of our mutual friends

1264
01:01:49,120 --> 01:01:50,800
Speaker 5: with her. When I saw the three of them walk

1265
01:01:50,840 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 5: into the room together, I was already annoyed. We already

1266
01:01:53,920 --> 01:01:56,240
Speaker 5: argued by text, so I didn't understand the need to

1267
01:01:56,240 --> 01:01:58,960
Speaker 5: bring in an audience. Because of this, we argued again

1268
01:01:59,160 --> 01:02:01,080
Speaker 5: when she got there. To top it off, one of

1269
01:02:01,080 --> 01:02:02,960
Speaker 5: the other girls tried to get involved and I told

1270
01:02:02,960 --> 01:02:06,200
Speaker 5: her to respectfully shut up and butt out, as this

1271
01:02:06,280 --> 01:02:08,080
Speaker 5: has nothing to do with her. Then there was a

1272
01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:10,560
Speaker 5: knock on the door and it was a friend from reception.

1273
01:02:10,680 --> 01:02:12,160
Speaker 5: He took me out of the room and said that

1274
01:02:12,200 --> 01:02:14,440
Speaker 5: when my sister returned to the hotel room from dinner,

1275
01:02:14,640 --> 01:02:17,520
Speaker 5: she shouted at a girl from reception for even giving

1276
01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:19,800
Speaker 5: me the keys in the first place when the room

1277
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:22,640
Speaker 5: was booked under my name. LMAO.

1278
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:25,800
Speaker 7: Come on, man, you knew the program, You knew what

1279
01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:28,120
Speaker 7: was going on. Stop it making problems, sister.

1280
01:02:28,440 --> 01:02:31,800
Speaker 5: I was so embarrassed in this instance because I work

1281
01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:34,640
Speaker 5: at the hotel. I told him we were speaking about

1282
01:02:34,680 --> 01:02:37,960
Speaker 5: what the plans were in the room, apologized for her shouting,

1283
01:02:38,280 --> 01:02:40,560
Speaker 5: and said it wasn't an official complaint. I told him

1284
01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:42,680
Speaker 5: we would sort this out before going to sleep. When

1285
01:02:42,720 --> 01:02:45,800
Speaker 5: I returned to the room, I was fuming and only

1286
01:02:45,880 --> 01:02:47,840
Speaker 5: seeing red. I told her to get out of the room.

1287
01:02:47,920 --> 01:02:50,760
Speaker 5: She'd embarrassed me at my workplace and could either book

1288
01:02:50,800 --> 01:02:53,200
Speaker 5: another room or go to a different hotel. Sounds like

1289
01:02:53,240 --> 01:02:56,080
Speaker 5: a problem for her and her might I add bum

1290
01:02:56,440 --> 01:02:59,200
Speaker 5: of a boyfriend. She booked another room for one night,

1291
01:02:59,360 --> 01:03:02,440
Speaker 5: and at trip the rate of staff rate staff is

1292
01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:04,960
Speaker 5: thirty five for one night, and she booked at one

1293
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:06,400
Speaker 5: thirty for one night.

1294
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:08,320
Speaker 7: Dude, thirty five a night. That's nice.

1295
01:03:08,640 --> 01:03:11,080
Speaker 5: Probably for a nice hotel too. Yeah. She then asked

1296
01:03:11,120 --> 01:03:13,840
Speaker 5: me to pay seventy for the other room and move

1297
01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:16,480
Speaker 5: my stuff there, since her and her boyfriend had already

1298
01:03:16,480 --> 01:03:18,440
Speaker 5: spent the night in the room I was currently in.

1299
01:03:18,600 --> 01:03:21,040
Speaker 5: Why is her boyfriend not paying for it? I did

1300
01:03:21,080 --> 01:03:23,960
Speaker 5: say he was a bum. I paid her sixty thirty

1301
01:03:23,960 --> 01:03:26,040
Speaker 5: five for the room that I took and she paid for,

1302
01:03:26,120 --> 01:03:28,280
Speaker 5: and twenty five because I felt bad for her. I

1303
01:03:28,280 --> 01:03:30,480
Speaker 5: also refused to change my room because I was seeing

1304
01:03:30,520 --> 01:03:33,520
Speaker 5: red and fuming after my conversation with the reception staff.

1305
01:03:33,560 --> 01:03:36,320
Speaker 5: I slept on the sofa bed because her boyfriend and

1306
01:03:36,360 --> 01:03:38,480
Speaker 5: she had already used the bed, but I did not

1307
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:41,360
Speaker 5: want to move rooms because I wanted to be petty. Anyway,

1308
01:03:41,560 --> 01:03:43,480
Speaker 5: she packed her things and went to stay in the

1309
01:03:43,520 --> 01:03:45,680
Speaker 5: other room. Now it's the next day, and although I

1310
01:03:45,720 --> 01:03:48,880
Speaker 5: know I went too far, I don't really regret it.

1311
01:03:48,960 --> 01:03:51,320
Speaker 5: She's currently in the room with me as I managed

1312
01:03:51,360 --> 01:03:53,480
Speaker 5: to extend my booking, but she's planning on going to

1313
01:03:53,480 --> 01:03:56,040
Speaker 5: see her boyfriend and stay with him when he finishes work.

1314
01:03:56,160 --> 01:03:58,840
Speaker 5: We haven't spoken about what happened, although we've talked a

1315
01:03:58,880 --> 01:04:02,200
Speaker 5: little about regular Tension is very high in the room

1316
01:04:02,240 --> 01:04:04,320
Speaker 5: right now. What should I do? What do you guys think?

1317
01:04:04,360 --> 01:04:06,080
Speaker 5: Am I the a hole? And we have an edit?

1318
01:04:06,200 --> 01:04:08,360
Speaker 5: I should add that my sister did offer to pay

1319
01:04:08,400 --> 01:04:10,800
Speaker 5: for my train or uber back to my friends, but

1320
01:04:10,880 --> 01:04:13,200
Speaker 5: I refuse because my friend lives in a difficult location

1321
01:04:13,400 --> 01:04:14,400
Speaker 5: and we have some comments.

1322
01:04:14,440 --> 01:04:16,920
Speaker 7: I mean, like you said you wanted to be petty

1323
01:04:17,040 --> 01:04:19,959
Speaker 7: now the tensions are high. I mean, like, I think

1324
01:04:20,120 --> 01:04:22,880
Speaker 7: it just maybe not don't offer this again in the

1325
01:04:22,880 --> 01:04:26,360
Speaker 7: future Afterwards. I think it's easy to talk about like

1326
01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:28,800
Speaker 7: the virtues of like turning the other cheek, or like

1327
01:04:28,840 --> 01:04:31,040
Speaker 7: being the bigger person, or like letting things go. But

1328
01:04:31,080 --> 01:04:32,400
Speaker 7: it's like in the moment, it can.

1329
01:04:32,280 --> 01:04:32,800
Speaker 2: Be really hard.

1330
01:04:32,920 --> 01:04:34,000
Speaker 5: Also, it's a sibling thing.

1331
01:04:34,360 --> 01:04:37,760
Speaker 7: Yes, I know it's yes, it's it's harder when it's

1332
01:04:37,760 --> 01:04:38,360
Speaker 7: family too.

1333
01:04:38,560 --> 01:04:42,840
Speaker 5: When you literally said, like, hey, I can do I

1334
01:04:42,840 --> 01:04:45,520
Speaker 5: could put my neck out there for you. All you

1335
01:04:45,640 --> 01:04:48,400
Speaker 5: have to do is literally just follow these rules. If

1336
01:04:48,400 --> 01:04:49,880
Speaker 5: you can do that, we're gucci.

1337
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:53,200
Speaker 7: It was like super simple too. It was it's not complex.

1338
01:04:53,240 --> 01:04:55,240
Speaker 7: You were not asking a lot. You were helping her.

1339
01:04:55,120 --> 01:04:57,760
Speaker 5: Out coming number one. Honestly, I think both you and

1340
01:04:57,800 --> 01:05:00,400
Speaker 5: your sister had valid frustrations, but the way they played

1341
01:05:00,440 --> 01:05:03,400
Speaker 5: out just piled misunderstanding on top of stress until it

1342
01:05:03,440 --> 01:05:05,360
Speaker 5: blew up. You were in a tight spot with your

1343
01:05:05,360 --> 01:05:09,120
Speaker 5: accommodation and the hotel's strict policies, plus the fact you

1344
01:05:09,280 --> 01:05:11,920
Speaker 5: work there, which raises the stakes for you if anything

1345
01:05:11,960 --> 01:05:14,560
Speaker 5: goes wrong. On her side, she was looking forward to

1346
01:05:14,560 --> 01:05:17,280
Speaker 5: celebrating her birthday weekend with her boyfriend and friends. So

1347
01:05:17,320 --> 01:05:19,960
Speaker 5: when you turned up, it felt like her plans were hijacked.

1348
01:05:20,040 --> 01:05:22,080
Speaker 5: Neither of you really handled it calmly in the moment,

1349
01:05:22,240 --> 01:05:24,959
Speaker 5: but that's pretty normal when emotions run high. Wait until

1350
01:05:25,000 --> 01:05:27,000
Speaker 5: things settle a little, then have a column talk with

1351
01:05:27,000 --> 01:05:29,360
Speaker 5: her about how this escalated. You can acknowledge you were

1352
01:05:29,400 --> 01:05:32,080
Speaker 5: harsh and how you reacted while still explaining why you

1353
01:05:32,120 --> 01:05:34,840
Speaker 5: felt backed into a corner with the hotel rules and

1354
01:05:34,880 --> 01:05:37,440
Speaker 5: the embarrassment at work. Ask her to acknowledge that yelling

1355
01:05:37,480 --> 01:05:40,360
Speaker 5: at staff and bringing in friends to an argument wasn't

1356
01:05:40,360 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 5: fair either. That way, you're not trying to win the fight,

1357
01:05:43,280 --> 01:05:46,560
Speaker 5: but you're both just understanding each other better. Coming number two,

1358
01:05:46,640 --> 01:05:49,160
Speaker 5: your sister brought the agreement. She may have put your

1359
01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:52,000
Speaker 5: job in jeopardy. This could get back to management. I

1360
01:05:52,000 --> 01:05:55,440
Speaker 5: wouldn't have given her anything. She forfeited any consideration from

1361
01:05:55,520 --> 01:05:57,840
Speaker 5: the start. And that is the end of the story.

1362
01:05:57,920 --> 01:06:02,520
Speaker 7: What no resolution? What I mean it was written like

1363
01:06:02,640 --> 01:06:05,959
Speaker 7: they were still in the room. Yeah, so I hope

1364
01:06:06,000 --> 01:06:06,720
Speaker 7: it went well.

1365
01:06:06,960 --> 01:06:08,120
Speaker 2: They both go to jail.

1366
01:06:08,280 --> 01:06:10,439
Speaker 7: Op loses their job and they both go to jail

1367
01:06:10,480 --> 01:06:11,440
Speaker 7: because they were fighting