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Speaker 1: Scrubbing In with Becky Tilly and Tanya rad and iHeartRadio

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Speaker 1: and two times People's Choice Award winning podcast. Hello everybody,

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Speaker 1: It's Monday. How's everyone doing.

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Speaker 2: Happy Monday? Happy Monday.

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Speaker 1: If you hear a loud lawnmower type noise in the background,

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Speaker 1: that's for me. You're welcome. We're taking care of the

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Speaker 1: weeds outside of my place. Apparently you're taking care of

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Speaker 1: cause no, I'm not. But I there's like, my whole

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Speaker 1: building is concrete, so I don't know where they're weed whacking.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, but it's and it starts like as

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Speaker 1: soon as we hit record, they started it up.

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Speaker 2: Well I don't hear it over here, so could potentially

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Speaker 2: be good.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well if you don't hear it, then just know

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Speaker 1: that that's what's happening in my world. That's the excitement

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Speaker 1: of Monday.

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Speaker 2: You know, I have another UTI, so.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's about time that those stop.

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Speaker 2: I would say, you know, I kind of hit this

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Speaker 2: like epiphany where I realized that nobody cares about your

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Speaker 2: health as much as you do. Because I called my

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Speaker 2: doctor again and I was like, why do I keep

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Speaker 2: getting these? And his answer was just some women are

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Speaker 2: just prone to them. And I'm like that's not a thing.

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Speaker 2: Like give me things, like preventative things to do. So

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Speaker 2: I just went to like a deep hole and I'm

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Speaker 2: like fully just doing everything that I can to help prevent,

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Speaker 2: like in terms of preventative measures, like I'm getting all

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Speaker 2: new underwear, I'm getting all cotton underwear. I'm like taking

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Speaker 2: Cranberry pills daily.

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Speaker 1: Wait, what detergent do you use?

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Speaker 3: Do you think?

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Speaker 1: Do you use like a clean do you use clean tied?

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Speaker 1: Is it like a clean and clear?

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Speaker 2: It's like a tide pod?

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, you need to use like a clean

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Speaker 1: like simple ingredients. Because even if I use a tide

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Speaker 1: pod that or like a detergent that has like all

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Speaker 1: the chemicals and like this the fragrance and stuff, I

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Speaker 1: get irritated. Yeah that's good. That might be.

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Speaker 2: It that I literally didn't even cross my mind.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I literally feel like Meredith Gray right now.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I just like solved a case with

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Speaker 1: the simplest answer of all.

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Speaker 2: It's so true though, because and like my doctor, because

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Speaker 2: I kept saying, I'm like, I feel like it's not

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Speaker 2: good for me to be on I'm such like a

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Speaker 2: clean like, I like to, you know, eat organic and things.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I feel like it's not great for me

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Speaker 2: to keep ingesting these antibiotics. And he's like, Oh, it's

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Speaker 2: just just go straight to the urinary tract. It's not

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Speaker 2: a big deal. And I'm like, I don't know. I

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Speaker 2: feel like I need to really take things into my

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Speaker 2: own hands at this point. Yeah, I get a different detergent.

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Speaker 2: I did not even think about that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it really causes issues. I've heard that from a

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Speaker 1: lot of people who are actually more pro prone. The

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Speaker 1: thing is is that some people are more prone to them,

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Speaker 1: but there has to be measures you can take to

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Speaker 1: prevent to them from occurring as often is there occurring

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Speaker 1: for you?

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Speaker 2: Totally totally.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that's another thing that guys do not have to

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Speaker 1: go through that I sometimes feel a little bitter about.

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Speaker 4: I know, that's a long list.

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Speaker 2: It's a long list.

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Speaker 1: It's not I I just Oh, I'm about start my period.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like mad and like moody about everything. Well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: but like it is, but at the same time, like

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Speaker 1: mine's very manageable. I don't have like some people have

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Speaker 1: severe cramps. I don't know. My my period comes and

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Speaker 1: then It's never like on the exact day, but I

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Speaker 1: can feel it coming because I get so annoyed at

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Speaker 1: like a level of annoyance that just isn't rational, I.

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Speaker 2: Guess interesting mm hmmm, because mine's physical, Like my nipples

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Speaker 2: hurt so bad that they like literally just feel like

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Speaker 2: like any touch on my nipple is just like feels

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Speaker 2: like a knife.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, my whole my whole boob, honestly. And then Phoebe

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Speaker 1: has no regard, I think just because she thinks she's

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Speaker 1: so small that like she'll walk right on my chest

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Speaker 1: and I like want to just launch her. It is

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Speaker 1: not great. Do you guys ever get like nipple sensitivity?

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Speaker 4: That's a great question. I can't speak for all guys,

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Speaker 4: but I'll tell you that I do not.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Soston, No, I don't not that I'm so.

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Speaker 4: Periods is a big uh huh. I mean there's a

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Speaker 4: million of them, though, I mean ut I sas infections

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Speaker 4: in childbirth, childbirth, which is probably all encompassing. That's a

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Speaker 4: big one. But what about stuff like makeup?

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Speaker 1: I like makeup, so I don't really I think if guys,

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Speaker 1: if it was encouraged, encouraged socially to wear makeup. I

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Speaker 1: think guys might be a little more into it, just

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Speaker 1: like cover up, you know, dark circles and stay all right.

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Speaker 4: I count that as something I'm glad I don't have

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Speaker 4: to deal with. Like when it's time to go out,

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Speaker 4: I'm ready right like waxing, waxing. Yeah, that's about it.

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Speaker 5: Speak for yourself.

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Speaker 4: What about hair? I feel like hair is minimal maintenance

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Speaker 4: for a dude. We get it cut once a month

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Speaker 4: and it's ten box or twenty bocks or something. You

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Speaker 4: guys are paying hundreds of dollars.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Also guys, guys when they're when if you want

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Speaker 1: to lose weight, it can happen. Like if you just

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Speaker 1: can stay dedicated for like a week, you can lose

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Speaker 1: the weight you want.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so true.

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Speaker 1: It's just I don't really. It just goes to show

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Speaker 1: that women were supposed to be a little more curvy,

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Speaker 1: or we're supposed to just embrace how we're made and

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Speaker 1: how our body shape is and not. You know, that's

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Speaker 1: just how we were made.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, it's crazy. I feel I've said this before,

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Speaker 2: but I've seen Brad like Brad will just he can

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Speaker 2: go and have like you know, eat like all the things.

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Speaker 2: You know, he's on vacation, he'll come back and he'll

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Speaker 2: clean it up for like literally five days and work

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Speaker 2: out and he's like shredded.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that's cool too.

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Speaker 5: I see like all the time. I'll be walking down

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Speaker 5: the street and I'll see a woman who's like dressed

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Speaker 5: up and looks very nice and clearly put a lot

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Speaker 5: of effort and planning into what she's wearing. And then

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Speaker 5: the dude is wearing basketball shorts and like a T

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Speaker 5: shirt and a backwards hat. And I'm like, I just

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Speaker 5: see this all the time, like like dudes dressed like slobs,

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Speaker 5: and it's like totally fine.

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Speaker 1: Well, I do feel like girls, there is a sense

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Speaker 1: of fun of like getting ready and feeling pretty and

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Speaker 1: feeling all put together. Not that we like to do

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Speaker 1: it every day, but I even have had days where

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Speaker 1: I just do it to feel some sense of normalcy

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Speaker 1: because that is part of my you know, normal life

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Speaker 1: when outside of a pandemic. But speaking of how's everyone

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Speaker 1: feeling about everything opening back up again? Are we excited? Nervous? Answer?

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Speaker 4: You like a terrible idea. I don't understand why it's happening.

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Speaker 4: It seems to be happening for non health reasons.

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Speaker 2: Well, yeah, because like all these restaurants are like really hurting.

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Speaker 4: I mean, that's a tough balance, but it is a

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Speaker 4: tough for the economy if it's going to kill that

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Speaker 4: many more people. It's really a tough situation. And I

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Speaker 4: don't know what the right answer is. But I'm not

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Speaker 4: going to restaurants and I'm not going to movies, and

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Speaker 4: I'm not going to get an airplane.

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Speaker 1: I have I have a theory about it because I

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Speaker 1: think what happened is that with all the protests and

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Speaker 1: with that many people so close together, they weren't able

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Speaker 1: to tell people like you can't open your business, because

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Speaker 1: how do you rationalize we're going to have a protest

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Speaker 1: with that many people huddled together in one unit, and

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Speaker 1: we can't have open our business and have like precautions.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And I do have to say as somebody, I

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Speaker 2: have gone back to a restaurant since things started opening up,

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Speaker 2: and the changes have been like really great. Like the

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Speaker 2: menus are all uh, you scan the you know, the

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Speaker 2: scan it and it's on your phone so you don't

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Speaker 2: have to touch to the menu. And the places I've

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Speaker 2: gone everything's I haven't gone to a restaurant that's indoors.

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Speaker 2: Everything I've gone to has been outdoor. But you wear

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Speaker 2: your mask, you sit down, you're not none of the

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Speaker 2: tables are close to you, and then you walk out,

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Speaker 2: you leave, You're never in. Like I've never been inside

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Speaker 2: a restaurant yet, but it's felt very safe and like nice.

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Speaker 1: Speaking of you were spotted out and about did you.

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Speaker 2: Know this by who?

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Speaker 1: A scrubber?

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Speaker 2: Where?

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Speaker 1: I don't know wherever? You went out to eat recently

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Speaker 1: on a double date? Oh yeah, she posted, So I

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Speaker 1: took a break from I took a break from Facebook

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Speaker 1: and Twitter because I just like Instagram. One one social

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Speaker 1: media platform was enough for me. It still is. But anyways,

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Speaker 1: the last post I saw was like I just saw

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Speaker 1: Tanya in Red Star and let me just say she

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Speaker 1: is a lucky woman. Oh.

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Speaker 2: In the Facebook group, yeah.

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Speaker 1: And all the comments were like, oh my god, I'm

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Speaker 1: so happy. What does he look like? But it was

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Speaker 1: pretty like I don't think anyone shared any details. They

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Speaker 1: just said that you looked really happy.

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Speaker 2: That is so freaking funny. Why didn't she say hi?

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Speaker 1: Probably because she wanted to respect your well. I think

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Speaker 1: that was one reason, and I think she probably was

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Speaker 1: you know, being respectful to your time in space.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, wait, it was so funny. First of all,

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Speaker 2: I wish she would have said hi, and then yeah,

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Speaker 2: So the place we went was we went on a

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Speaker 2: double date with my neighbor who lives in my apartment complex,

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Speaker 2: her and her boyfriend. And the place is kind of

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Speaker 2: like it it's like an outdoor indoor situation where there's

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Speaker 2: like no roof. What's it called atrium? Oh in uh

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Speaker 2: right here? Oh yeah, no, no, no, it's the Space Star.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah. And it was just like super cute and

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Speaker 2: it felt like normal and nice and just really nice.

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Speaker 2: The best part about it is we came back because

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Speaker 2: it's a Mexican restaurant, and so we came back home

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Speaker 2: that night and we like literally acted like we were

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Speaker 2: like in college. We were like let's uh, we were like,

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Speaker 2: let's do tequila shots, and we like took tequila shots,

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Speaker 2: and we both are really bad at taking shots, so

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Speaker 2: like our shots were literally the size of like this,

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Speaker 2: and bro, I was like, take one off my take

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Speaker 2: body shot, lick my arm like fully back and like

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Speaker 2: try to make it like we were like on vacation

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Speaker 2: but not.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, you gotta do what you gotta do

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Speaker 1: be creative right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was actually really fun, Tinya.

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Speaker 4: Did you have a nice conversation with Red Star about

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Speaker 4: male Genitalia like you said you were to last week?

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Speaker 3: No?

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Speaker 4: I did, Okay, Wow, I was looking forward to.

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Speaker 2: It's I'm not like a conversation. I'm just like so

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Speaker 2: fascinated by it is nobody else fascinated.

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Speaker 1: Have you ever just told him that you're mesmerized and

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Speaker 1: fascinated for sure?

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Speaker 2: For sure?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Because.

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Speaker 1: I'm not really good about himself.

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Speaker 2: He knows where I stand. Yeah, he knows where I

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Speaker 2: stand on the side of his.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, we right ninety five? P and I

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Speaker 1: went and met friends for like a picnic outside yesterday

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Speaker 1: in Santa Monica. And when we saw our friends, I

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Speaker 1: was like, are we do we get to hug? Are

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Speaker 1: we like hugging?

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Speaker 2: Or I know that's it's so awkward because some people

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Speaker 2: like want to do the the you know, the elbow bomb.

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Speaker 2: Some people give you a fist bomb. Some people don't

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Speaker 2: even want to touch you. Some don't want to hug you.

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Speaker 1: I know, I think they felt bad because they hugged me,

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Speaker 1: but I didn't. I think I probably pressured them into that.

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Speaker 1: But it felt it felt safe, you know, felt good

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Speaker 1: about it. I miss I miss like my friends and

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Speaker 1: going places. I can't wait to feel comfortable doing normal

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Speaker 1: things again because I'm kind of like Mark, I'm in

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Speaker 1: this weird. I don't think I'm ready yet.

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you, come on a devil with red

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Speaker 2: star and eye to the place by us because it's great.

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Speaker 2: It's all outdoors.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, we already saw it. I've already been exposed

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Speaker 1: to you.

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Speaker 2: So don't seem so thrilled about that idea.

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Speaker 1: No, I am. I just got to think about it,

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Speaker 1: you know. But what's touching the dishes? You know that

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Speaker 1: you're eating, he's making the food?

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Speaker 2: Well, who's making the food when you order it from Postmates?

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Speaker 1: Same people don't have to know, don't have to think

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Speaker 1: about it.

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Speaker 4: Just appears.

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Speaker 2: It's the same exact thing. And then you at the

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Speaker 2: table and you're just constantly like, I mean, I'd probably

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Speaker 2: pure out my hands way more than I even need to, but.

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Speaker 1: Like, yeah, we are about to talk to one of

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Speaker 1: our scrub sisters. She sent me a DM about oh,

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Speaker 1: I guess, like almost two weeks ago, and it was

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Speaker 1: just a really kind but also insightful email. I mean

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Speaker 1: DM because she is one of our scrubbers and she

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Speaker 1: is a black woman, and she always kind of I

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Speaker 1: guess in her DM, which I'll read, but she has

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Speaker 1: just mentioned that she listens to the podcast and loves

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Speaker 1: it and relates to us. But there was a disconnect

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Speaker 1: because our lives are different because we're white and she's

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Speaker 1: not white and her friend isn't white. And it was

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Speaker 1: like it was just a I opening DM because it

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Speaker 1: was something I hadn't even thought about, honestly, So I

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Speaker 1: wanted to talk to her because I've been going back

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Speaker 1: and forth through DM and text and I just wanted

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Speaker 1: to have her on and kind of probably speak for

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Speaker 1: a lot of people who feel the same way.

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Speaker 6: Can you help me?

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Speaker 1: Yes?

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Speaker 3: Okay, cool.

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Speaker 6: How are you guys doing.

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Speaker 1: We're great.

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Speaker 2: How are you?

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Speaker 3: I'm good?

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much for coming on. I'm sorry I

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Speaker 1: frantically texted you last minute, but I was like, I

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Speaker 1: really want to talk and have you on and talk

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Speaker 1: about kind of like the DM that you originally sent me,

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Speaker 1: because I was telling Tanya it felt like such an

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Speaker 1: eye opening moment of like kind of like duh, but

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Speaker 1: also you were so kind about it. And it was

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Speaker 1: just it kind of made me realize there's probably so

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Speaker 1: many people who listen to the podcast who have felt

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Speaker 1: the same way that you feel with that disconnect that's there,

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Speaker 1: and how you how you felt watching The Bachelor as

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Speaker 1: a guilty pleasure And do you mind if I read

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Speaker 1: the email a little bit?

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Speaker 6: D Okay, Yeah, that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Becca was telling me about the DM and I was like,

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Speaker 2: it's It's interesting because I've kind of had the same

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Speaker 2: revelation in the past few weeks because I've been watching,

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Speaker 2: you know, these documentaries, and I've been reading White Fragility

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Speaker 2: and trying to like learn all these things. But I

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Speaker 2: also realized I had this epiphany where I was like,

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Speaker 2: every show that I watch on a regular basis has

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Speaker 2: a fully white cast. It's like, yeah, Friends, Sex and.

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Speaker 7: The City, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Rais Anatomy is like ninety percent all white. And it's like,

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Speaker 2: I don't watch a single show that is a fully

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Speaker 2: black cast. And so trying to like incorporate that, because

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Speaker 2: I just did, it just didn't even like occur to me.

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Speaker 6: Register.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, I think that it does a register because it's

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Speaker 7: kind of like when you just kind of hang out

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Speaker 7: with people that you just know, like if you grow

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Speaker 7: up at a certain area, that's just what you've become

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Speaker 7: accustomed to. So it's like I watched X in the

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Speaker 7: City too, like that's my show as well. But at

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Speaker 7: the same time, like I can see here and I

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Speaker 7: can watch other things, because that's not really like my

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Speaker 7: true reality, if that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, I'm gonna read just a little excerpt.

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Speaker 2: Oh an, except so, okay, don't be a hater.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So Lola said, my mom and I have been

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Speaker 1: a fan of the Bachelor since the early two thousands.

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Speaker 1: I watched you on ben season and loved you in

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Speaker 1: Jojo as a black woman, watching The Bachelor was my

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Speaker 1: guilty pleasure with quotes because Black people were rarely seen

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Speaker 1: on the show, which made me feel guilty watching People

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Speaker 1: want to understand why I love to show that black

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Speaker 1: people were so underrepresented in but I still watched. Although

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Speaker 1: Rachel Lindsay, whom I love, was the first black bachelorette,

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Speaker 1: it didn't really change black people's thoughts on the show.

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Speaker 1: Totally agree. I ended up coming across your page in

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Speaker 1: your podcast after I saw a repost of an episode

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Speaker 1: on a Mutual ig Friends story. Taylor Bank shout out

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Speaker 1: to Taylor Banks. I started listening to one episode and

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Speaker 1: it ended up being my new guilty pleasure. You and

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Speaker 1: Tanya reminded me of myself and my best friend, but

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Speaker 1: there was still a disconnect. The disconnect was y'all being

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Speaker 1: white and my best friend and I being black. Although

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Speaker 1: there were so many things we had in common, so

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Speaker 1: many I never felt a strong connection with y'all because

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Speaker 1: my life and my struggle was different than you all's.

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Speaker 1: This part I found. This part is the moment I

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Speaker 1: was like, WHOA, I have been so ignorant to what's

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Speaker 1: going on in the black community. We call it being

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Speaker 1: care free like a white girl, but it basically means

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Speaker 1: that you all don't face the same problems that we do,

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Speaker 1: so you were able to live a care free life

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Speaker 1: with no repercussions, which isn't always true, but a lot

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Speaker 1: of times it is. Another example is the term white

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Speaker 1: girl wasted, which deeper roots expresses how white girls can

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Speaker 1: get as crazy as they want because they live in

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Speaker 1: a world made for the progression, no matter what decisions

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Speaker 1: they make. To be completely transparent, I never followed you

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Speaker 1: all on social media because I didn't want to watch

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Speaker 1: care Free girls who I believe didn't understand black women's

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Speaker 1: struggles all day long on my feed, and then she

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Speaker 1: said today I changed that, and I hit that follow

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Speaker 1: button with a quickness. Thank you for not saying you

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Speaker 1: were going to do the work. Thank you for not

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Speaker 1: only saying you were going to do the work, but

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Speaker 1: actually doing the work. Thank you for researching and reading

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Speaker 1: so anyways, I just thought that was so like important

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Speaker 1: for you to express those because, like I said it,

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Speaker 1: it made me feel ignorant that it wasn't something I

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Speaker 1: ever considered, and also made me understand so much more

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Speaker 1: why someone listening who is black is like, I love this,

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Speaker 1: but I don't see where I fit in in this.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, And I think it's to like to say, like okay,

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Speaker 7: to say you should feel guilty as mon thing, because

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Speaker 7: I do feel that this is has made it so

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Speaker 7: that I think a lot of people are just kind

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Speaker 7: of blinded by what's going on. They're not in like

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Speaker 7: they don't really understand, like okay, like there's I'm watching

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Speaker 7: The Bachelor and it's only white people, you know, because

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Speaker 7: if you grew up in that setting, that's like you're

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Speaker 7: so for us watching it from an outsider it's kind

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Speaker 7: of like, okay, but we still watch because you know,

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Speaker 7: it's a love story.

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Speaker 3: We love a love story.

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Speaker 7: But at the same time, it comes to like a point, Okay,

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Speaker 7: Rachel Lindsay's season, and then after that it was just like, okay,

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Speaker 7: well we had it was like our token black person.

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Speaker 3: And then now we're going to go back to how

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Speaker 3: we were.

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Speaker 7: And I think that was a slap in all black

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Speaker 7: people's faces, and I think Rachel Lindsay's as well, because

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Speaker 7: it was just like I thought I'd seen progression, but

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Speaker 7: then now it's just like, Okay, I guess you guys

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Speaker 7: are just you guys just use me as a way

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Speaker 7: to be like to kind of shut people up.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And I've seen a lot of the responses for

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Speaker 1: them announcing Matt James as the Bachelor has kind of

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Speaker 1: been the same way of like, is this just you

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Speaker 1: feeling the pressures of what's going on or are you

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Speaker 1: genuinely trying to to make a change and for this

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Speaker 1: to be moving forward? What it looks like to me

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Speaker 1: on the show, m like, do you have did? What

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Speaker 1: were your thoughts on it?

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Speaker 6: I felt the same way when I heard it. It's funny.

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Speaker 3: My sister text me.

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Speaker 6: She was like you hear he's a bachelor, and I

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Speaker 6: was just like, oh, that's funny.

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Speaker 7: Like I just felt like it was just so contrived

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Speaker 7: and just like they knew if they had the pressure

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Speaker 7: on them. I listened to like the Rachel, Lindsay and

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Speaker 7: Becca episode of their podcast, and it was just very

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Speaker 7: telling the things that Rachel were saying. And then right

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Speaker 7: after that it kind of was just like, Okay, he's

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Speaker 7: a bachelor.

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Speaker 1: Now.

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Speaker 7: It's like almost like it's it's great that it's happening,

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Speaker 7: but it's almost like it's almost like too late, like

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Speaker 7: you guys had all these years to have a black

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Speaker 7: bachelor or like you know, they've had people. I guess

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Speaker 7: they have people of color, but like to have like

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Speaker 7: an actual bachelorette okay, and then a black bachelor. It's

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Speaker 7: funny because in like the black community, we make a

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Speaker 7: joke of it, like, oh, like you know, if you're

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Speaker 7: black on that show, you're not gonna make it very

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Speaker 7: far because they're always going to kick you off like

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Speaker 7: the first second episode.

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Speaker 3: It's like a joke.

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Speaker 7: It's like almost like yeah, like we're not watching that,

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Speaker 7: and it's sad, I think for because it's a great show.

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Speaker 7: I think it's a great show, and I like it.

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Speaker 7: I enjoy watching it. But it's sad because it's not

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Speaker 7: just that, it's a lot of shows that are or

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Speaker 7: even just like how like the Oscars it was a

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Speaker 7: huge deal that like Moonlight wan that year and like

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Speaker 7: certain things like that. It's like funny, like the fact

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Speaker 7: that like it's still we're still doing these first this

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Speaker 7: first black person of this or first black person of that.

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Speaker 7: It's like kind of sad if you look back into it.

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Speaker 7: I feel like our world kind of makes us kind

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Speaker 7: of blind to it because sometimes I'll go through my

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Speaker 7: day to day and not even realize, you know, like

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Speaker 7: systemic racism and stuff. But like when you get down

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Speaker 7: to the root of it, you're just like, oh, shoot,

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Speaker 7: like I do make less at work than the people

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Speaker 7: that I'm working with and I do the same job,

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Speaker 7: or like I do you know, get told X, Y

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Speaker 7: and Z about my hair at my job and that

440
00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,600
Speaker 7: it needs to look a certain way and be a

441
00:21:57,680 --> 00:21:59,879
Speaker 7: certain pattern and stuff like that, and it almost like

442
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:02,640
Speaker 7: opened your eyes to it every day.

443
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,919
Speaker 1: Well, it's so it's funny you say that because I

444
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 1: went to a private school growing up. I told you

445
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 1: about this because I was we had a dialogue and

446
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,200
Speaker 1: you were telling, you know, telling me like look up

447
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:19,800
Speaker 1: the Black Wall Street in Tulsa, and in my mind's

448
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:22,800
Speaker 1: just been blown over how little we learn in school

449
00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:27,280
Speaker 1: about black history beyond Martin Luther King Junior and Rosa

450
00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:32,680
Speaker 1: Parks like you had mentioned. And I started thinking about

451
00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:35,520
Speaker 1: in school like when the few like we didn't have

452
00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:37,000
Speaker 1: a lot of black people in my school, but the

453
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:38,920
Speaker 1: few that did, it was like your hair needs to

454
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:42,240
Speaker 1: be a certain way, you know, it was the rules.

455
00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:45,040
Speaker 1: It was like, wait, that's not looking back. I'm like

456
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:46,240
Speaker 1: that is not right.

457
00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:47,399
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's not.

458
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:50,760
Speaker 7: And it's like it sucks for us because it's I

459
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,400
Speaker 7: will never get I went to like a camp when

460
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,280
Speaker 7: I was like maybe like in middle school, and I

461
00:22:55,359 --> 00:22:57,119
Speaker 7: was like the probably one of the only black girls

462
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:00,800
Speaker 7: at the camp, and these white girls were like trying

463
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:02,760
Speaker 7: to touch my hair and just kind of being like,

464
00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 7: you know, like, oh, like.

465
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:06,399
Speaker 6: You should do this to your hair, you should do

466
00:23:06,480 --> 00:23:07,120
Speaker 6: this to your hair.

467
00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:10,239
Speaker 7: And I was just like it it's sad that like

468
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,400
Speaker 7: as little girls you grow up to be like you're

469
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,400
Speaker 7: not good enough or like you should look like this

470
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:19,000
Speaker 7: or this is not acceptable and I think that in

471
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,240
Speaker 7: our society now, I'm I'm happy that people are.

472
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:23,879
Speaker 3: Aware and people are you know, learning and stuff like that.

473
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,679
Speaker 7: And that's why I message you, Becka, because I was like,

474
00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 7: she's actually taking the time to like read books and

475
00:23:27,760 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 7: not just like posting a black box and just leaning

476
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:32,520
Speaker 7: in at that, but she's actually like doing.

477
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:34,520
Speaker 6: The work and like, okay, like I'm finding this out.

478
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:36,800
Speaker 7: And that's why I was like, I don't people say

479
00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:38,960
Speaker 7: like they don't want to sit in inform white people

480
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 7: about new things or like tell them about books or

481
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,840
Speaker 7: educate them basically. But you know, and I feel the

482
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,359
Speaker 7: same way, like I shouldn't have to educate people because

483
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:49,120
Speaker 7: the Google's there. But the same time, like if you're

484
00:23:49,119 --> 00:23:50,960
Speaker 7: doing the work, I don't have any problem saying like, hey,

485
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:52,760
Speaker 7: you should read that as well, or that's something that

486
00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:53,880
Speaker 7: maybe you should look into as well.

487
00:23:53,920 --> 00:23:55,080
Speaker 3: Like the Tulsa, Oklahoma thing.

488
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,640
Speaker 7: A lot of people don't know about that, and obviously

489
00:23:57,640 --> 00:23:59,879
Speaker 7: it's not taught in our schools at all, like that

490
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:02,840
Speaker 7: something that's just class passed down from like black people

491
00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 7: to black people or there was like, uh, it's called

492
00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:08,520
Speaker 7: like the Tusky Syphilist experiment and that was when they

493
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:12,119
Speaker 7: like in the fifties, they injected black people with syphilists

494
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:17,719
Speaker 7: in Alabama to basically see how the like basically sipless

495
00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:20,639
Speaker 7: progresses as a disease and people don't know that, but

496
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:22,920
Speaker 7: it's passed down and that's why Black people kind of

497
00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 7: have this shame about the hospitals because they don't trust hospitals.

498
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:28,280
Speaker 7: So everything is kind of like an effect for everything else.

499
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:32,560
Speaker 7: And it's like, we I don't want to sit here

500
00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:34,520
Speaker 7: and just be idle and not say like I'm gonna

501
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:36,359
Speaker 7: I'm not gonna, you know, inform people of us. I

502
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 7: want to I want to tell people like, hey, read

503
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:40,080
Speaker 7: this or look this up so that we can you

504
00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 7: can go on to your chouldren and kind of tell

505
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:43,800
Speaker 7: them those things too, and we can create a better

506
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:45,880
Speaker 7: world for our next generation.

507
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:50,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, So has the company that you're working for have

508
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:53,959
Speaker 1: have you or like, has anyone challenged them with the

509
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 1: things that you were just talking about about your hair

510
00:24:56,080 --> 00:25:00,520
Speaker 1: and all that stuff? Has anyone challenged those rules? Are

511
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:03,159
Speaker 1: what has been done in that workplace?

512
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,200
Speaker 7: Yeah, we actually wrote a letter to the CEO and

513
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,919
Speaker 7: you know, he was very apologetic and stuff, and he

514
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,119
Speaker 7: definitely like made it.

515
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:13,439
Speaker 6: I mean, we'll see.

516
00:25:13,520 --> 00:25:15,840
Speaker 7: I guess it's just one of those we'll see situations

517
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:17,639
Speaker 7: that like, you know what I mean. But you know,

518
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 7: he did say that we would get je teenth juneteenth off,

519
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:24,080
Speaker 7: which is June nineteenth, and so that's a big step

520
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:26,680
Speaker 7: and we'll see what else comes from that. But you know,

521
00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:30,399
Speaker 7: I'm I'm optimistic, but at the same time, I'm cautiously optimistic.

522
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:32,520
Speaker 2: You know, it's interesting that you were saying that about

523
00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:36,480
Speaker 2: the like the you know, the token black lead and

524
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,320
Speaker 2: the Bachelorette or how they now cast Matt James, because

525
00:25:39,320 --> 00:25:41,159
Speaker 2: I was I did think, you know, I think it

526
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:43,919
Speaker 2: obviously crossed everybody's minds, like okay, well now you know,

527
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 2: it's like they had no choice, you know what I mean.

528
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 2: But I was watching Daily Pop the other day and

529
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,120
Speaker 2: Justin Sylvester was kind of touching on on that type

530
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:55,400
Speaker 2: of stuff where he was saying, like, you know, because

531
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:56,800
Speaker 2: there's a lot of backlash with I don't know if

532
00:25:56,800 --> 00:25:58,639
Speaker 2: you guys, I can't remember what the Instagram account was,

533
00:25:58,680 --> 00:25:59,879
Speaker 2: but it was like these girls that were going to

534
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:03,320
Speaker 2: the protests and they're like Coachella outfits, like oh yeah,

535
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:05,600
Speaker 2: I'm like, you know what I mean, and just like

536
00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:07,880
Speaker 2: it taking it as like a you know, Instagram moment

537
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:10,960
Speaker 2: or whatever. And I had gone to a couple of

538
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:12,879
Speaker 2: protests and I kind of took a step back just

539
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:14,919
Speaker 2: from social media for a little bit, just because I

540
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:18,360
Speaker 2: was reading and watching and learning and just I just

541
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:20,800
Speaker 2: took them, you know, didn't really want to post because

542
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:22,600
Speaker 2: I was like, this isn't about me. You know, I'm

543
00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:24,639
Speaker 2: here because I want to be a part of something bigger.

544
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:28,080
Speaker 2: And I was watching him talk about this and he

545
00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:31,360
Speaker 2: was like, you know what, sometimes yes, maybe people's intention

546
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,879
Speaker 2: isn't the best, but he's like, at least they're out there.

547
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:36,960
Speaker 2: At least they're a body. At least they're you know

548
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:39,399
Speaker 2: what I mean, Like at least is happening. Do you

549
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,840
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like things are moving forward. Whether

550
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 2: you know their intentions aren't necessarily the greatest, it's like,

551
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,520
Speaker 2: at least things are moving forward and happening.

552
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:49,720
Speaker 3: Yeah.

553
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,399
Speaker 2: I thought that was an interesting perspective because for me,

554
00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:55,119
Speaker 2: I was kind of it's like, you know, as a

555
00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:57,000
Speaker 2: white woman, I have been feeling the shame and the

556
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 2: guilt and you know, because I hadn't been educated, and

557
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:01,240
Speaker 2: I was like, this isn't you know, I don't want

558
00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:02,920
Speaker 2: to post this, and he was like, if you're in

559
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,120
Speaker 2: any protests, you better you know, I want to see

560
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 2: you posting that, and like I want to see you

561
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:07,960
Speaker 2: know what I mean. Like, he was very vocal, and

562
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:10,280
Speaker 2: I was like, Oh, that's an interesting perspective that I

563
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 2: didn't necessarily think about, you know, until like I heard

564
00:27:13,119 --> 00:27:14,240
Speaker 2: him talking about about it.

565
00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:16,000
Speaker 7: Yeah, I can agree with that because I think that

566
00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:19,399
Speaker 7: like just a white body out there is just enough

567
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:22,160
Speaker 7: to kind of give us the traction that we needed

568
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,399
Speaker 7: because we were fighting for this with Trayvon Martin, we

569
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 7: were fighting for this with Aaron Garner.

570
00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:27,199
Speaker 6: We're fighting for this with my.

571
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:29,600
Speaker 3: Brown and no one hurt us. We can't.

572
00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:32,159
Speaker 6: They don't listen to us alone. They don't listen to us,

573
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:35,000
Speaker 6: so we need why even if you're just a white body.

574
00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:36,600
Speaker 7: And out there just kind of for a photo op,

575
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:41,200
Speaker 7: Like I mean, it's unbriginate, but like we need you because.

576
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:42,000
Speaker 6: They're now listening.

577
00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:43,000
Speaker 3: They're now like.

578
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:46,480
Speaker 7: And it's almost it's crazy to think, like I feel

579
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:48,360
Speaker 7: like I'm in the twilight zone because every day a week,

580
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:49,720
Speaker 7: I'm just like because.

581
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 6: We've been just going through this for so long and.

582
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:52,960
Speaker 3: Just fighting for these things.

583
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:56,040
Speaker 7: Like I was in Saint Louis like marching for Mike

584
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:59,200
Speaker 7: Brown and that, like it's just frustrating. You almost get

585
00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 7: so defeated because it's just like no change is coming.

586
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,639
Speaker 7: And this is the first time I remember, I'll never

587
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:07,439
Speaker 7: forget it was. It's I don't know if you know her,

588
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,160
Speaker 7: but she's a black panther. He name is Andrew David.

589
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,119
Speaker 7: She was a black panther and she came out and

590
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:13,600
Speaker 7: said like, this is the first time I've really seen

591
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:16,760
Speaker 7: like this is going somewhere. And she was there fighting

592
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:19,159
Speaker 7: in the seventies for us as well. Like for her

593
00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:21,640
Speaker 7: to say, like I can like this is the first

594
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 7: time I see like a change's going to happen. It

595
00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 7: makes us all feel good. And that's why I agree

596
00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:28,880
Speaker 7: with him, Like if there's a white body out there,

597
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:29,760
Speaker 7: just be a white body out.

598
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:31,359
Speaker 3: There, but they'll listen to us if the white body's

599
00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:31,879
Speaker 3: out there.

600
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:36,199
Speaker 1: Well yeah, because even if they post a photo that

601
00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 1: they took specifically for Instagram, maybe their followers will be like, oh,

602
00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 1: she was at a protest, Like I should be right,

603
00:28:45,320 --> 00:28:47,280
Speaker 1: you know, like you don't know how people are going

604
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: to respond to it, but I know as far as

605
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:54,960
Speaker 1: the announcement of Matt James. I I feel the same way.

606
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:58,239
Speaker 1: I totally get the feeling of being like cautious of

607
00:28:58,760 --> 00:29:01,640
Speaker 1: will this actually be a change? Is this due to pressure?

608
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 1: But I have to hope that with everything happening right

609
00:29:07,920 --> 00:29:11,560
Speaker 1: now and like seeing what's happening and been happening, that

610
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:15,600
Speaker 1: this will be hopefully just the start of what they

611
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:17,440
Speaker 1: continue to do something better.

612
00:29:19,320 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 6: But I hope, so I think it will. I honestly

613
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 6: I think it will. I think that, like with all

614
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:25,280
Speaker 6: of this, that's happy.

615
00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:27,280
Speaker 7: People are aware now, you know, as you guys said,

616
00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:29,240
Speaker 7: like you know, you weren't even aware that this was

617
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:31,600
Speaker 7: going on, So now that you're aware, you want to

618
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 7: do something. So if other people feel like that, I

619
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,200
Speaker 7: don't feel like this is gonna go away. I feel

620
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:40,400
Speaker 7: like we're on a trending upwards. So I'm I'm optimistic

621
00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 7: about it.

622
00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel I'm I as like someone who is

623
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: just because a lot of times there's a moment that's

624
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:52,200
Speaker 1: like so trendy and everyone's talking about it and by

625
00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 1: now it's kind of like no one's really talking about

626
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 1: it anymore.

627
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 3: And mostly Yeah, but I feel like.

628
00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:01,240
Speaker 1: I'm still seeing so I mean, obviously people are living

629
00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,720
Speaker 1: their lives. But I've seen so much more awareness of

630
00:30:04,720 --> 00:30:07,760
Speaker 1: this not dying down as far as people learning, sharing

631
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 1: what they're learning, reposting great advice and resources. So it's

632
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:15,320
Speaker 1: encouraging to see that it wasn't just a one week

633
00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:17,160
Speaker 1: trend with the black box and then it's.

634
00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:19,680
Speaker 7: Yeah, no, and it's and I think that's super important.

635
00:30:19,760 --> 00:30:21,080
Speaker 7: We don't want it to be a trend. We want

636
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 7: it to be something that likes a change that we

637
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,520
Speaker 7: can like, we don't have to sit here and tell

638
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 7: our kids because every black kid has the same conversation

639
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:29,600
Speaker 7: with their.

640
00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:32,640
Speaker 3: Parents about the police. If you're a girl, if your boy, Like, you're.

641
00:30:32,440 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 7: Still going to have the same conversation when you're like thirteen,

642
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:37,920
Speaker 7: twelve thirteen with the police. And I remember my mom

643
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:39,640
Speaker 7: was telling my something. She was talking to a coworker

644
00:30:39,680 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 7: about something, and there she was like, oh really, like

645
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:45,240
Speaker 7: she was completely oblivious to that conversation.

646
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 3: It's like, there are certain things that we do.

647
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:50,320
Speaker 7: In our household that like a lot of other families

648
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:52,080
Speaker 7: of different races would not do.

649
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:53,640
Speaker 6: And it's I.

650
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 7: Hope that I don't have to do that with my

651
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,640
Speaker 7: son or my daughter, have to have a conversation with

652
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 7: them about how to react when the police pulls you

653
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:02,520
Speaker 7: over and what to do and like what not to do.

654
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 3: So I'm hoping that this can be a change.

655
00:31:06,320 --> 00:31:11,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's weird because the the first time that realization

656
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:14,360
Speaker 1: hit me that that black families have those conversations with

657
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:17,200
Speaker 1: their kids was on Gray's Anatomy when Bailey and Ben

658
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 1: had that oversation, and I was like, is this really? Like,

659
00:31:21,000 --> 00:31:24,320
Speaker 1: is this really what's happening? Is this happening for every family?

660
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:27,960
Speaker 1: Like my mind, I think that was just another level

661
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: of just being ignorant to what reality is for people. Yeah,

662
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:35,680
Speaker 1: don't look like me. You focus on all you know

663
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 1: and all you've grown up with, and then all of

664
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 1: a sudden, in a span of two weeks, now it's

665
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 1: all this, all these things to unlearn and to learn,

666
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:49,640
Speaker 1: and there's mistakes and there's fear of saying the wrong thing.

667
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:51,120
Speaker 1: But at least people are talking.

668
00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:51,920
Speaker 2: Mmm.

669
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:52,680
Speaker 6: I agree.

670
00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 1: So well, I'm so happy that I got to talk

671
00:31:58,200 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 1: to you and see your face and just you.

672
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 2: Know, so nice to have you on problem so much.

673
00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 6: Thank you, guys, it's great.

674
00:32:06,120 --> 00:32:07,760
Speaker 2: Shout out your wait, can we shout out your best

675
00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:08,200
Speaker 2: friend too?

676
00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:11,320
Speaker 6: Oh? That's Coastla Frampton.

677
00:32:12,720 --> 00:32:16,120
Speaker 7: You want to want to go more like Tawnya ones like, yeah,

678
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:18,040
Speaker 7: I'm like you, Becca, That's why I like when you

679
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:20,160
Speaker 7: were like when you text me right now, like oh

680
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:23,200
Speaker 7: in ten minutes, I was like, that's me, So that's fine.

681
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:28,680
Speaker 1: I really I really appreciate that quality of people because.

682
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 7: Sometimes but yeah, my best friend is just like Tanya're

683
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:36,479
Speaker 7: like she's super like particular, super like clean.

684
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:40,200
Speaker 2: Interest have it in my calendar.

685
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 3: Yes, a week before.

686
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:47,200
Speaker 7: I appreciate talking to you guys though, thank you for

687
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:51,080
Speaker 7: using your podcast is like a platform for this conversation stuff.

688
00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 7: So I really appreciate that, and I think the black

689
00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:54,280
Speaker 7: girls I listen to this as well.

690
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:55,120
Speaker 3: Appreciate it as well.

691
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 1: Oh so much.

692
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:59,800
Speaker 6: I love you guys to no problem, good bye.

693
00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 1: I'm really glad we got to talk to her because

694
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:20,880
Speaker 1: I've been wanting to have her on to talk because

695
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:25,320
Speaker 1: I thought it was an important insight to how probably

696
00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 1: a lot of our scrubbers have felt. And I just

697
00:33:27,000 --> 00:33:29,600
Speaker 1: kind of wanted to touch on that because I feel like

698
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 1: it wasn't something we've talked about or acknowledged. I guess,

699
00:33:33,760 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 1: so sure.

700
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 2: I really I've also like never even like like I

701
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,560
Speaker 2: was saying, I've never even watched. I can't imagine their

702
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:42,920
Speaker 2: perspective because I've never even watched a TV show with

703
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:45,640
Speaker 2: an all black cast. Uh huh, So like there's obviously

704
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,800
Speaker 2: like a huge disconnect that I just didn't even realize.

705
00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:52,080
Speaker 1: And even on another I remember Catherine Lowe who's married

706
00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:55,440
Speaker 1: to Sean from their Bachelor season. She posted and she

707
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:57,280
Speaker 1: was like, to be honest, I thought I was just

708
00:33:57,360 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 1: there for representation as a token Asian girl, and I

709
00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:02,880
Speaker 1: never thought I even had a chance. And it just

710
00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:05,960
Speaker 1: kind of goes to show how people who are not whiter,

711
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:10,399
Speaker 1: who are the minority they even being casted on the show,

712
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:13,480
Speaker 1: didn't it feel like she was being taken seriously so

713
00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,759
Speaker 1: and like listening to our podcast as well, like they're

714
00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:21,760
Speaker 1: the beckend Tanya, except there is a little disconnect because

715
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 1: there's a disconnect. So I was really happy to.

716
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 4: Talk to her that well. It's it's more proof that

717
00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 4: the scrubbers are just the greatest people that there are,

718
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 4: because she was she's awesome and really.

719
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:38,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, literally the greatest people that they are, like truly, truly,

720
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:41,000
Speaker 2: I've had some pretty interesting conversations with some as well,

721
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:44,800
Speaker 2: and like it's like really like lifted me a lot.

722
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:48,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, we do have the best of the best.

723
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:52,919
Speaker 2: Speaking of scrubbers, I feel like we got some emails.

724
00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:55,320
Speaker 4: And we got some feedback. Lauren wants to thank Tanya

725
00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 4: for sharing the book Calling in the One after going

726
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 4: through a horrible breakup earlier the here, I started reading

727
00:35:01,040 --> 00:35:03,080
Speaker 4: it and I have since met a man on Bumble

728
00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:06,960
Speaker 4: and he is seriously the one. Along with therapy, the

729
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 4: book helped to work through all my past relationship baggage

730
00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:12,520
Speaker 4: and manifest what I wanted in a relationship. Thank you.

731
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:16,959
Speaker 2: That makes me very happy. A book did the same,

732
00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:18,640
Speaker 2: literally the exact same thing for me.

733
00:35:19,719 --> 00:35:21,640
Speaker 1: Do you get a lot of those messages telling you

734
00:35:21,719 --> 00:35:22,520
Speaker 1: about people.

735
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:26,440
Speaker 2: Reading Beyond Beyond? I've like, literally think it's so funny.

736
00:35:26,520 --> 00:35:28,760
Speaker 2: I think maybe Eesan, you sent me this, or somebody

737
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 2: sent me to google my name and that book title

738
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:35,480
Speaker 2: pops up. It's like Tanya Rad Calling in the One,

739
00:35:35,760 --> 00:35:37,560
Speaker 2: or like Tanya Red. Yeah, let me see.

740
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,760
Speaker 1: You should be making some commission on those sales.

741
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:46,879
Speaker 4: I get Tanya Rad boyfriend, Tanya Rad Instagram, Tanya Rad

742
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:49,040
Speaker 4: net Worth, and Tanya Rad real name.

743
00:35:50,040 --> 00:35:53,400
Speaker 2: Oh weird, who was it? Somebody sent sent me a screenshot?

744
00:35:53,480 --> 00:35:56,960
Speaker 5: It was like Tanya, I sent you something, but it

745
00:35:57,000 --> 00:36:02,400
Speaker 5: wasn't about the work. It was something where yeah, I

746
00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:06,160
Speaker 5: was I was looking for Tanya's oat cookie recipe, and

747
00:36:06,200 --> 00:36:08,640
Speaker 5: so I googled Tanya rad cookies and says people also

748
00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:11,120
Speaker 5: ask is Tanya Rad dating post Malone?

749
00:36:11,719 --> 00:36:18,280
Speaker 2: And that I got that from a lot of people too,

750
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 2: because Ryan called Senor Butterfly no post Malone, and so

751
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 2: I think people didn't realize that it wasn't It wasn't

752
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:28,759
Speaker 2: like no post because he didn't post on social media.

753
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:31,279
Speaker 2: That thought they thought it was just like post Malone.

754
00:36:35,840 --> 00:36:37,919
Speaker 2: I had somebody that I met recently that was like, yeah,

755
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:39,320
Speaker 2: didn't you date post Malone?

756
00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:42,839
Speaker 4: I was like, that's hilarious.

757
00:36:43,640 --> 00:36:44,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is really funny.

758
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:47,880
Speaker 1: Remember when you dan post Malone and filled your heart

759
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:50,280
Speaker 1: about what his songs meant to you?

760
00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:52,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, and he never Literally I don't even know if

761
00:36:52,360 --> 00:36:54,879
Speaker 2: he's seen it. That's actually so sad. I wanted to.

762
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 1: Hope that he hasn't seen it. Like, if I DM

763
00:36:57,440 --> 00:36:59,920
Speaker 1: anyone and don't get a response, my prayer is just

764
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:02,640
Speaker 1: that got lost in the shuffle.

765
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:05,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, like if he saw it and then ever responded,

766
00:37:05,760 --> 00:37:07,680
Speaker 2: that'd make me even sadder. I don't even know at

767
00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:09,799
Speaker 2: this point if he did. Internet didn't because I've tagged

768
00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:12,200
Speaker 2: him in so many things that like it's buried.

769
00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:16,840
Speaker 4: But like Jesse, Jesse Williams, I haven't.

770
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:19,680
Speaker 1: Checked recently, but I'm just gonna hope for the best

771
00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 1: that he he's busy.

772
00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:24,320
Speaker 4: By the way, I finished Little Fires everywhere. Speaking of Jesse,

773
00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:27,799
Speaker 4: did you love it? I did? But it's hard because

774
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:30,440
Speaker 4: I read the book, so then there's like it's different.

775
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 4: It's a different experience when you've read the book.

776
00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:35,839
Speaker 2: Wait, because the book's better.

777
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:38,440
Speaker 4: I'm not even saying that. I'm saying it's just like

778
00:37:38,680 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 4: you pictured things differently and they changed little things, and

779
00:37:42,239 --> 00:37:45,359
Speaker 4: that bothers you, and you're anticipating things rather than being

780
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 4: surprised by things. I actually thought it was very well done,

781
00:37:49,360 --> 00:37:50,759
Speaker 4: but it's just a different experience.

782
00:37:51,719 --> 00:37:54,239
Speaker 1: It's so interesting because a lot of people who did

783
00:37:54,280 --> 00:37:57,840
Speaker 1: read the book and then watch the show even said

784
00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 1: that they thought the show was better. I saw that

785
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:03,479
Speaker 1: a lot, because normally it's always that the book is better,

786
00:38:03,800 --> 00:38:06,720
Speaker 1: you know, like I would say ninety nine point nine percent,

787
00:38:06,760 --> 00:38:08,600
Speaker 1: the book is always better. But that was the first

788
00:38:08,640 --> 00:38:11,840
Speaker 1: one where I saw a good amount of people saying

789
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 1: that the show was better. It was just so well

790
00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,799
Speaker 1: casted that it was. It was just great. I would

791
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 1: love to just watch that with fresh eyes again.

792
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,160
Speaker 4: This is an anonymous email or. I started talking to

793
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 4: a guy in December on Hinge. We texted for three

794
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,279
Speaker 4: weeks and one on our first dated a couple of

795
00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 4: nights before New Year's Eve. We had a conversation in

796
00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 4: the beginning of February about what we are and he

797
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:35,480
Speaker 4: made it very clear he wasn't ready to be in

798
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:38,759
Speaker 4: a relationship. But he's one hundred percent committed to me.

799
00:38:39,120 --> 00:38:39,840
Speaker 4: Now that's true.

800
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:41,840
Speaker 2: That mean that doesn't even make.

801
00:38:41,719 --> 00:38:44,319
Speaker 4: Sense come back to that. Since then, I have met

802
00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:46,799
Speaker 4: his dad, his sister, his mom, his brother in law,

803
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:50,040
Speaker 4: his nieces and nephews. The problem is, since our conversation

804
00:38:50,120 --> 00:38:52,759
Speaker 4: in February, we haven't talked about us or where this

805
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,399
Speaker 4: is going. It's been weighing on me a lot. If

806
00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:57,040
Speaker 4: he isn't going to be able to commit, I have

807
00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:59,560
Speaker 4: to move on because I don't give out any discounts.

808
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:02,680
Speaker 4: I know I need to talk to him, but I

809
00:39:02,719 --> 00:39:04,080
Speaker 4: have no idea how to bring it up and start

810
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:07,040
Speaker 4: the conversation. Health help, please, this is annoying.

811
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:10,800
Speaker 1: You want to start Tanya or Mark February.

812
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 2: So February is when this conversation happened. March, April, May, June,

813
00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:18,360
Speaker 2: so it's been four months that they've been in this limbo. Yes,

814
00:39:20,480 --> 00:39:23,200
Speaker 2: and he won't be he doesn't want to be her boyfriend,

815
00:39:23,239 --> 00:39:25,640
Speaker 2: but he's on committed committed.

816
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:27,320
Speaker 1: I don't understand that.

817
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 2: Then you don't need to be one hundred percent committed

818
00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:33,160
Speaker 2: to him. Go spread your seed.

819
00:39:37,080 --> 00:39:38,720
Speaker 4: I don't know that that's the great advice.

820
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know if that's the advice we want

821
00:39:41,120 --> 00:39:44,440
Speaker 1: to give her to spread her seed, but I do

822
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:48,680
Speaker 1: agree with I think the bigger picture of what Tanya

823
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:51,520
Speaker 1: is saying is that, well, I think you need that's

824
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:55,360
Speaker 1: been a while. We've been as a world. We have

825
00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:59,320
Speaker 1: been through a lot since February, so maybe it's time.

826
00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:02,920
Speaker 1: It's very much time to sit down and have a conversation.

827
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:07,920
Speaker 1: And these conversations are uncomfortable. That's why we ask people

828
00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:11,440
Speaker 1: for help or write in emails because they're uncomfortable and

829
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:13,480
Speaker 1: we want someone to make it easier for us. But

830
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 1: really they're just uncomfortable. And I think you need to know.

831
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:19,880
Speaker 1: You said it yourself. You're not giving discounts. You know

832
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 1: you're worth. Have a conversation with him. If he's defensive

833
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:26,600
Speaker 1: or reactive, then I think it's time to move on.

834
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: But if he's just kind of like, oh, I thought

835
00:40:29,120 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 1: you met everyone in my family, I thought we were

836
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 1: in a committed relationship, then that just means he's.

837
00:40:35,800 --> 00:40:38,759
Speaker 2: I mean, like I fully had this awkward conversation. Like

838
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,760
Speaker 2: I fully had this awkward conversation and it was terrible

839
00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:45,840
Speaker 2: and I will like cried after and uh, I'll never forget.

840
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:48,880
Speaker 2: It was that night that that Becca we went to

841
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:51,440
Speaker 2: that Create and Cultivate when because we got that award

842
00:40:51,680 --> 00:40:55,960
Speaker 2: for the podcast. Yeah, it was that night that we

843
00:40:56,040 --> 00:40:58,879
Speaker 2: like kind of had this like uncomfortable conversation because we've

844
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,880
Speaker 2: been dating for you'd been dating for like a little

845
00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 2: over two and a half months at that time, and

846
00:41:04,560 --> 00:41:07,920
Speaker 2: like I wanted to be in a serious, committed relationship,

847
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:09,719
Speaker 2: Like I just wanted to take that next step and

848
00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 2: he wasn't ready, and so I kind of just like

849
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:15,200
Speaker 2: we had that awkward conversation and I just realized that

850
00:41:15,239 --> 00:41:18,839
Speaker 2: it was like important to me and it was something

851
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:21,480
Speaker 2: I needed to communicate to him. And he obviously didn't

852
00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 2: like jump on that, but I was like I'm going

853
00:41:24,640 --> 00:41:26,440
Speaker 2: to keep I said I'm going to keep dating you,

854
00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:30,040
Speaker 2: but I'm also going to date other people because I

855
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:34,200
Speaker 2: I want something not like my expectation of this dating

856
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:36,800
Speaker 2: might might be different than your expectation of this dating.

857
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:39,440
Speaker 2: And so I don't want to end things with you

858
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,160
Speaker 2: because I'm having a really good time and I really

859
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,360
Speaker 2: like you, But I also don't want to like only

860
00:41:44,440 --> 00:41:46,480
Speaker 2: date you if you're not going to be on the

861
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 2: same page as me. So it sucked. And like we

862
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:51,040
Speaker 2: were in this weird phase for probably like a week

863
00:41:51,120 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 2: or two, and then he came. I don't know if

864
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:55,759
Speaker 2: he came around or I don't. I think he just

865
00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 2: realized that like his fear. I think for men, I

866
00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:01,040
Speaker 2: don't know that the guy that you're dating, I don't

867
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:03,640
Speaker 2: know what his history is or like why he doesn't

868
00:42:03,640 --> 00:42:05,719
Speaker 2: necessarily want to be your boyfriend or be in a

869
00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:10,200
Speaker 2: commun relationship. But you can't devalue that on him, like

870
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:13,799
Speaker 2: there's obviously some reason, but if he wants to be

871
00:42:13,920 --> 00:42:17,800
Speaker 2: with you, he'll step away from that fear of whatever

872
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:20,080
Speaker 2: that is. And that's what happened to my case. He

873
00:42:20,120 --> 00:42:22,960
Speaker 2: was just like the fear, like the fear of losing

874
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:26,279
Speaker 2: you was worse than like my fear of being in

875
00:42:26,280 --> 00:42:27,239
Speaker 2: a relationship again.

876
00:42:27,719 --> 00:42:31,120
Speaker 1: So I was like, that was a very productive situation

877
00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 1: when you decided that you were like, listen, I like you,

878
00:42:34,600 --> 00:42:36,720
Speaker 1: I want to be with you. You know where I stand,

879
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:38,799
Speaker 1: but I'm going to date other people if you can't

880
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:41,560
Speaker 1: be one hundred percent in with me. And he pretty

881
00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:48,319
Speaker 1: quickly decided that he would rather have you than not.

882
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:52,399
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think it was literally like a week if that. Yeah,

883
00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:55,400
Speaker 2: it was like a week. Yeah, But it was an

884
00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:57,719
Speaker 2: awkward conversation and I hated it, Like I hated the

885
00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:00,520
Speaker 2: thought of even saying, I'm you know, if I'm going

886
00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:02,440
Speaker 2: to date other people, you can date other people. Like

887
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:03,920
Speaker 2: I hated it because I didn't want to dating other

888
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:05,600
Speaker 2: people and I didn't really want to date other people,

889
00:43:05,600 --> 00:43:06,759
Speaker 2: but I knew I didn't want to be in that

890
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:07,800
Speaker 2: situation either.

891
00:43:08,520 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 1: Mark, what were you going to say?

892
00:43:09,719 --> 00:43:11,960
Speaker 4: I hate it because he's scared. He's just he's very,

893
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:14,600
Speaker 4: very scared for whatever reason. I don't know his history,

894
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:18,000
Speaker 4: but he has a really strong fear of commitment. And yes,

895
00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:20,560
Speaker 4: I know all guys do, but this is fairly acute

896
00:43:20,560 --> 00:43:22,239
Speaker 4: to say I don't want to be in a relationship

897
00:43:22,320 --> 00:43:24,839
Speaker 4: right now, but I'm one hundred percent committed to you.

898
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:27,360
Speaker 4: It doesn't make any sense. So if I'm you, I

899
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:28,520
Speaker 4: go to him and I say, can I get an

900
00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:30,279
Speaker 4: update because in February you don't want to be in

901
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:32,520
Speaker 4: a relationship. Is that still the case? He's like, yeah,

902
00:43:32,600 --> 00:43:34,920
Speaker 4: I'd be like, well, I got bad news for you.

903
00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:38,160
Speaker 4: You're in a relationship. We've been together one hundred percent

904
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:41,320
Speaker 4: committed to each other for four to six months now,

905
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:44,880
Speaker 4: we've met everyone in our families. Whoops, it happened. So

906
00:43:45,280 --> 00:43:47,520
Speaker 4: I need you to kind of be all in on

907
00:43:47,560 --> 00:43:50,799
Speaker 4: this or we need to pull back on this, right.

908
00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:53,600
Speaker 2: I know, But I feel like there's probably some reason

909
00:43:54,800 --> 00:43:58,120
Speaker 2: that this guy has that's like making him fearful of it,

910
00:43:58,160 --> 00:43:59,480
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. I don't know what that is.

911
00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:01,919
Speaker 4: But he's just a millennial dude.

912
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:05,000
Speaker 2: I mean, he could be. I'm trying to give him

913
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:05,799
Speaker 2: the benefit of the doubt.

914
00:44:05,840 --> 00:44:08,200
Speaker 4: I appreciate that I'm not because guys are the worst,

915
00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:10,319
Speaker 4: and no one knows that better than a guy.

916
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:12,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, my mind's going to some bad places, like like

917
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:15,320
Speaker 5: he's one hundred percent committed to like five other people

918
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 5: like that kind of thing.

919
00:44:16,680 --> 00:44:19,359
Speaker 4: But I'm not thinking that. But I think he just

920
00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 4: wants he wants an out clause, like if things get difficult,

921
00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:26,200
Speaker 4: if things get weird, if she starts to encroach on

922
00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:28,440
Speaker 4: his personal space, he can just pull the ripcord and

923
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,640
Speaker 4: get out and say we we were never in a relationship.

924
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:34,080
Speaker 4: Like any think he wants an escape hatch, but that's

925
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:35,240
Speaker 4: not that's not allowed.

926
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:38,600
Speaker 5: He introducing her to the family members, like is this

927
00:44:38,680 --> 00:44:42,359
Speaker 5: my lady friend or like what is he my chest?

928
00:44:42,560 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 4: This is my casual acquaintance.

929
00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:45,319
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't know.

930
00:44:45,480 --> 00:44:47,279
Speaker 1: Yeah that is true.

931
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:51,920
Speaker 2: Like he probably says, this is the girl I'm dating.

932
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:57,279
Speaker 4: Right, that's weird, is it. Yeah, this is one of

933
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:58,280
Speaker 4: the girls I'm dating.

934
00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,640
Speaker 5: She sounds like a police gonnis or something like, this

935
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 5: is one of my girlfriends. Now, if there's anything wrong.

936
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:10,799
Speaker 2: With that, if that's what you exactly, But that's that's just.

937
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:12,560
Speaker 5: Where my mind when. I hope that's not the case.

938
00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:14,880
Speaker 6: But I don't know.

939
00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:16,400
Speaker 5: I've just known guys to do that before.

940
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:22,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like, I'm interested. I just the main I

941
00:45:22,239 --> 00:45:24,879
Speaker 1: think from all of us is half the conversation. That's

942
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:25,600
Speaker 1: the main advice.

943
00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:29,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't hate something of an ultimatum at this point.

944
00:45:29,280 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 4: It could be a soft ultimatum, but I feel like

945
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:33,839
Speaker 4: he's got to do what he's gonna do or get

946
00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 4: off the pod. I agree, Ashley. As a follow up

947
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:40,320
Speaker 4: for you, Tanya, have you mentioned the L word to

948
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,760
Speaker 4: mister Starr?

949
00:45:43,280 --> 00:45:43,759
Speaker 2: I have not.

950
00:45:44,200 --> 00:45:46,680
Speaker 4: Well, she says she want to share her story with you.

951
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:49,880
Speaker 4: She began dating her boyfriend in May of sixteen, told

952
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:54,520
Speaker 4: him she loved him in October of sixteen. She had, huh,

953
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:56,360
Speaker 4: I think this.

954
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:57,839
Speaker 2: I think she danned we keep going.

955
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,400
Speaker 4: She had felt those feelings since their second date. He

956
00:46:00,440 --> 00:46:03,200
Speaker 4: didn't say it back until February of seventeen, So that is,

957
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:05,960
Speaker 4: by my math, four months from her saying and I

958
00:46:06,000 --> 00:46:08,560
Speaker 4: love you to him saying I love you. He then

959
00:46:08,640 --> 00:46:10,640
Speaker 4: told me when he first knew he fell in love

960
00:46:10,640 --> 00:46:13,040
Speaker 4: with me, which was our third date. But dude, past

961
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:15,799
Speaker 4: relationships and now he handles his emotions, he couldn't bring

962
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:17,600
Speaker 4: himself to say it to me when I said it

963
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:20,360
Speaker 4: to him. See, fear, Guys are so scared all the time.

964
00:46:20,520 --> 00:46:23,279
Speaker 4: And I'm not saying it's all illegitimate fear. It's just

965
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,720
Speaker 4: there's so much fear in dudes. We are still together,

966
00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:29,000
Speaker 4: we just bought our first house together and adopted a

967
00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:31,399
Speaker 4: third puppy. I just wanted to say, not all men

968
00:46:31,400 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 4: and women are the same. Just because they don't say

969
00:46:33,160 --> 00:46:34,799
Speaker 4: it back right away doesn't mean they don't have those

970
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:35,680
Speaker 4: feelings already.

971
00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:40,319
Speaker 2: I think that I've realized, especially in this relationship, that

972
00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:46,359
Speaker 2: like I I'm coming from like we're just coming at

973
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:49,080
Speaker 2: it from just two very different perspectives. Like I'm coming

974
00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:51,720
Speaker 2: at it not having been in a relationship for almost

975
00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:56,399
Speaker 2: a decade, and he is literally the complete opposite. And

976
00:46:56,440 --> 00:47:01,120
Speaker 2: so it's kind of having to just realize that we're

977
00:47:01,200 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 2: kind of doing things that are at at different pace

978
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:11,120
Speaker 2: and are comfortable with different things. I don't know, it's

979
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 2: interesting because I was watching Renee Brown's called The Courage,

980
00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:19,319
Speaker 2: and it's all about vulnerability, and like, I think, just

981
00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:20,920
Speaker 2: for me, it's like, as long as I can just

982
00:47:20,920 --> 00:47:24,279
Speaker 2: be like vulnerable with myself, you know, I'm gonna have

983
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,359
Speaker 2: those like honest conversations with myself with about how much

984
00:47:27,400 --> 00:47:29,920
Speaker 2: I can take and how much I'm willing to you know,

985
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:37,600
Speaker 2: bend or whatever, then I'll be okay, cool.

986
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:40,799
Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean, I think it's when it comes down

987
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:43,400
Speaker 1: to it, it's gonna be on what's the best timing

988
00:47:43,440 --> 00:47:45,440
Speaker 1: for each of you as individuals, Like just because you're

989
00:47:45,480 --> 00:47:49,840
Speaker 1: in a relationship. Doesn't mean that everything's like sink the

990
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:52,560
Speaker 1: same as far as like when you're ready to say

991
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:54,400
Speaker 1: it or when he's ready to say it. It's all

992
00:47:54,440 --> 00:47:59,239
Speaker 1: gonna come when it feels right to you as you Yeah,

993
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:01,799
Speaker 1: when it feels right to him? Is him? Well there

994
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:05,680
Speaker 1: we go, calling him the one need to have a

995
00:48:05,719 --> 00:48:09,719
Speaker 1: conversation and when the time is right at tright. Did

996
00:48:09,760 --> 00:48:12,160
Speaker 1: anyone have any highs or lows of the week that

997
00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:13,200
Speaker 1: they'd like to share?

998
00:48:14,120 --> 00:48:17,040
Speaker 4: Well, that's really interesting you say that because Ben Higgins

999
00:48:17,080 --> 00:48:19,640
Speaker 4: asked me that earlier today. I've not been asked that

1000
00:48:19,920 --> 00:48:22,919
Speaker 4: in years. Probably where your highs and lows and Ben and.

1001
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,600
Speaker 2: You are random?

1002
00:48:25,400 --> 00:48:27,200
Speaker 1: You know, Ben Higgins and I. I think that my

1003
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:30,080
Speaker 1: journey was to go on The Bachelor to meet Ben

1004
00:48:30,120 --> 00:48:32,960
Speaker 1: as a friend. Honestly, even though I was like trying

1005
00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 1: to get with him, I think the end result was

1006
00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:39,120
Speaker 1: so much better because he's someone I text all the

1007
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:43,160
Speaker 1: time for advice when I'm needing some like wisdom, because

1008
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:47,880
Speaker 1: I just I love Ben Higgins. Can't say enough about him,

1009
00:48:48,160 --> 00:48:50,640
Speaker 1: So I'm honored that we both asked the same question.

1010
00:48:51,320 --> 00:48:54,000
Speaker 4: He is the best, He's a great guy. My kids

1011
00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:57,520
Speaker 4: are both done with school. They were officially. The oldest

1012
00:48:57,600 --> 00:48:59,359
Speaker 4: is done with middle school and the youngest has done

1013
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 4: with elementary schoo So that's a major time for the family.

1014
00:49:03,600 --> 00:49:05,440
Speaker 1: You're gonna have a high schooler.

1015
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 4: I mean I kind of do, I guess, but yeah,

1016
00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:09,120
Speaker 4: she starts in the fall, but we don't know what

1017
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:11,360
Speaker 4: that's gonna look like. She's actually gonna go to a building.

1018
00:49:12,000 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 4: Knows what's gonna happen. But yes, Wow, my oldest is

1019
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:17,240
Speaker 4: in high school. And she got a part in the play,

1020
00:49:17,800 --> 00:49:20,919
Speaker 4: which is another interesting thing. It's a musical which part

1021
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:24,200
Speaker 4: she's one of the daughters and the Pirates of Penzance.

1022
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:30,239
Speaker 4: But it's all going to be pre recorded or live streamed.

1023
00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 4: There will not be an audience for it.

1024
00:49:33,320 --> 00:49:33,920
Speaker 1: That's fun.

1025
00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:35,400
Speaker 4: It's a whole new world.

1026
00:49:35,960 --> 00:49:38,400
Speaker 1: And then Low No, Low just only highs.

1027
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 4: Low's is. I don't think we're going to Wisconsin this summer.

1028
00:49:40,880 --> 00:49:42,880
Speaker 4: We do every summer, and I don't think so. Like,

1029
00:49:43,160 --> 00:49:46,600
Speaker 4: we had a friend who oh No, over the weekend

1030
00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:49,319
Speaker 4: and she sent us some pictures of an airport full

1031
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:53,160
Speaker 4: of people and maybe half of them were wearing masks

1032
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:55,080
Speaker 4: and half of them weren't, And I just I can't.

1033
00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:57,319
Speaker 4: I can't do that, and I hate that. And that's

1034
00:49:57,320 --> 00:50:00,959
Speaker 4: frustrating because if everyone's wearing masks, I'm but no one's

1035
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:02,280
Speaker 4: wearing masks.

1036
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:03,080
Speaker 1: Ye.

1037
00:50:03,480 --> 00:50:05,560
Speaker 4: So that was a low was the realization that for

1038
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:08,839
Speaker 4: the first time, literally ever since I moved to la

1039
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 4: in ninety eight, it doesn't look like we're going home

1040
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:13,320
Speaker 4: this summer at all. I really I have found that

1041
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:15,640
Speaker 4: I mark the time of the year by our two

1042
00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:19,400
Speaker 4: trips to Wisconsin each year and baseball. So I feel

1043
00:50:19,520 --> 00:50:22,160
Speaker 4: very a drift. I don't know what time of year

1044
00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:24,680
Speaker 4: it is, the time I've lost.

1045
00:50:26,280 --> 00:50:29,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, a drift, A drift.

1046
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:32,360
Speaker 2: It is true though, like we have these mile markers

1047
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:34,200
Speaker 2: for the year time right.

1048
00:50:34,560 --> 00:50:36,239
Speaker 4: Like there's going to be no fireworks this year on

1049
00:50:36,239 --> 00:50:38,759
Speaker 4: the fourth of July. Like that's a marker of the year,

1050
00:50:38,920 --> 00:50:40,239
Speaker 4: is when you see the fireworks.

1051
00:50:41,280 --> 00:50:41,680
Speaker 1: The fact that.

1052
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:44,240
Speaker 2: Fourth of July is like coming up is sane.

1053
00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 1: Eastern high flows.

1054
00:50:47,680 --> 00:50:51,400
Speaker 5: At the beginning of quarantine, my wife Allison, and I

1055
00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:55,239
Speaker 5: painted our kitchen cabinets. We did half of them. We

1056
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:57,239
Speaker 5: put off the other half till this last weekend and

1057
00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:02,200
Speaker 5: they look great, very proud. Wow, they're they're green. Now

1058
00:51:02,320 --> 00:51:04,240
Speaker 5: I'll send you a picture cute.

1059
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:08,560
Speaker 1: I'm very pa you know, that's what I was saying.

1060
00:51:08,719 --> 00:51:11,080
Speaker 5: I was saying that too. You know, we're just like

1061
00:51:11,080 --> 00:51:13,200
Speaker 5: shipping Joanna putting a new code of fan on those

1062
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:14,560
Speaker 5: kitchen cabinets.

1063
00:51:15,360 --> 00:51:15,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was a.

1064
00:51:15,960 --> 00:51:19,800
Speaker 5: High and then a low. I'm I'm very very fortunate

1065
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:22,480
Speaker 5: right now that I have a lot of work when

1066
00:51:22,520 --> 00:51:25,160
Speaker 5: a lot of people don't. But is it is a

1067
00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:26,960
Speaker 5: lot of work, and I am finding out very hard

1068
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:30,560
Speaker 5: time balancing, uh finding balance with that, and I I

1069
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:34,880
Speaker 5: hit several walls this last week, and uh that is

1070
00:51:34,960 --> 00:51:38,600
Speaker 5: that is difficult, but all for good things. And uh,

1071
00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:40,880
Speaker 5: you take you know, you take these things one day

1072
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:43,160
Speaker 5: at a time and you become better at managing them

1073
00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:44,560
Speaker 5: each day. So that's how I'm trying to look at it.

1074
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:45,960
Speaker 4: Well, that's your guy who likes to sneak in a

1075
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:48,840
Speaker 4: lot of Disneyland and a lot of Marvel movies. Like,

1076
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:50,440
Speaker 4: there's a lot of stuff that you do just to

1077
00:51:50,480 --> 00:51:52,359
Speaker 4: be you, and you're not having time for that right now.

1078
00:51:52,400 --> 00:51:54,239
Speaker 5: Hey man, though, you know they just put all of

1079
00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:57,440
Speaker 5: the Scooby Doo on HBO Max. They're not gonna watch themselves.

1080
00:51:57,520 --> 00:52:00,759
Speaker 5: You know, I got a I gotta work my way

1081
00:52:00,760 --> 00:52:01,040
Speaker 5: through it.

1082
00:52:01,560 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 3: Uh, But yeah.

1083
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:04,520
Speaker 5: That's what I have to say.

1084
00:52:04,600 --> 00:52:08,080
Speaker 1: Well, I would just like to say that we at

1085
00:52:08,080 --> 00:52:11,239
Speaker 1: this podcast appreciate you in all of your work, both

1086
00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:18,520
Speaker 1: of you, Andy and Danielle. We can't see, but Tanya,

1087
00:52:19,040 --> 00:52:22,680
Speaker 1: highs lows low might be the UTI, which we've covered,

1088
00:52:22,719 --> 00:52:24,080
Speaker 1: but if you have another one that.

1089
00:52:24,080 --> 00:52:27,320
Speaker 2: You can play low, the low is definitely my UTI

1090
00:52:27,520 --> 00:52:33,239
Speaker 2: for sure, and the high is I'm getting better at

1091
00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:35,680
Speaker 2: my omond Cracker recipe. I think I really got a

1092
00:52:35,719 --> 00:52:40,960
Speaker 2: good situation going, got it back up again. I think

1093
00:52:41,000 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 2: I really got a winner.

1094
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:45,920
Speaker 1: Okay, who's going to be the tester for that? Because

1095
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:48,480
Speaker 1: you thought the ones you gave me were good as well?

1096
00:52:49,760 --> 00:52:52,239
Speaker 2: Well, I need to perfect it first, probably in like

1097
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:53,520
Speaker 2: two days when I do my next.

1098
00:52:53,320 --> 00:52:58,600
Speaker 1: Back is perfecting it the texture or this taste texture?

1099
00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,160
Speaker 1: I was going to suggest both.

1100
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:04,600
Speaker 4: But.

1101
00:53:05,160 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 1: It's coming along good. I'm excited for the day that

1102
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:09,920
Speaker 1: those are edible.

1103
00:53:11,760 --> 00:53:12,799
Speaker 2: What about your high and low?

1104
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:18,600
Speaker 1: I had a bunch of lows, honestly, way more lows

1105
00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:24,760
Speaker 1: than highs. Unfortunately. Lows would probably be just some conversations

1106
00:53:24,760 --> 00:53:28,839
Speaker 1: with family members that I've had have been low, and

1107
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:33,160
Speaker 1: highs would be the beaches are back open. In Santa Monica.

1108
00:53:33,280 --> 00:53:34,919
Speaker 1: So I went to the beach a few times last

1109
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:38,319
Speaker 1: week and it was so nice to just like I get,

1110
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:40,920
Speaker 1: I get. It literally feels like a cleanse when I

1111
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:42,320
Speaker 1: go to the beach and I'm by the water.

1112
00:53:42,520 --> 00:53:44,640
Speaker 2: So I know, I really want to go to the beach.

1113
00:53:44,760 --> 00:53:46,919
Speaker 2: I've been thinking about that since they opened. I really

1114
00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:47,400
Speaker 2: want to do that.

1115
00:53:47,480 --> 00:53:50,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was really nice, went on long walks, listen

1116
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:53,319
Speaker 1: to podcasts. It was just I went by myself one

1117
00:53:53,360 --> 00:53:55,399
Speaker 1: of the days and it was just nice to go

1118
00:53:55,520 --> 00:54:02,160
Speaker 1: and kind of be alone, honestly, So that was my high.

1119
00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:04,520
Speaker 4: Does anybody bother you when you go by yourself? Do

1120
00:54:04,560 --> 00:54:06,640
Speaker 4: people come up and say hello or and not bother

1121
00:54:06,680 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 4: you necessarily? But do people come up and and do

1122
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:11,719
Speaker 4: people hit on you or anything like that?

1123
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:14,479
Speaker 1: No, I normally go to a plate Well that doesn't

1124
00:54:14,520 --> 00:54:17,520
Speaker 1: happen that often anyway, but I normally go to a

1125
00:54:17,560 --> 00:54:19,840
Speaker 1: place it's like this little kind of cove once you

1126
00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:22,200
Speaker 1: get on the beach, and it's normally like maybe one

1127
00:54:22,360 --> 00:54:24,440
Speaker 1: family with kids is right there, and I have a

1128
00:54:24,480 --> 00:54:26,680
Speaker 1: hat on and just kind of sitting them to myself.

1129
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:30,040
Speaker 1: So now I have this visor that I posted on

1130
00:54:30,120 --> 00:54:32,479
Speaker 1: Instagram and it covers my whole face. So I'm really

1131
00:54:32,520 --> 00:54:34,520
Speaker 1: gonna go and just stare at people because no one

1132
00:54:34,520 --> 00:54:37,680
Speaker 1: can see it. I'm so excited. I'm just gonna be like,

1133
00:54:38,600 --> 00:54:39,880
Speaker 1: but no one knows where I'm looking.

1134
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:43,279
Speaker 2: I have so many visors, it's like insane. I really

1135
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:44,400
Speaker 2: went crazy on the visors.

1136
00:54:44,520 --> 00:54:46,680
Speaker 1: Is the eye injury?

1137
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:48,920
Speaker 2: Well yeah, it was like the eye injury, and then

1138
00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:50,840
Speaker 2: like I also feel like I'm trying to protect myself

1139
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:54,520
Speaker 2: from the sun. But it's like a whole thing.

1140
00:54:54,880 --> 00:54:58,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, the visors are tough because they're so long that

1141
00:54:58,719 --> 00:55:03,200
Speaker 1: probably running is they're probably moving. I can't relate. I

1142
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 1: don't run anymore.

1143
00:55:04,160 --> 00:55:05,359
Speaker 2: Little suffocating too.

1144
00:55:06,200 --> 00:55:08,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, if you wear it up, it's still blocking

1145
00:55:08,239 --> 00:55:10,680
Speaker 1: your face, you know what I'm saying.

1146
00:55:10,880 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 2: True, true, Well.

1147
00:55:13,440 --> 00:55:16,440
Speaker 1: Thanks for sharing the highs and lows. I hope that

1148
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:21,600
Speaker 1: the gloves go away, the uti, the stress. I hope

1149
00:55:21,640 --> 00:55:24,400
Speaker 1: that Wisconsin maybe comes to you. I don't know what

1150
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:27,960
Speaker 1: the solution is there, or that maybe one of our

1151
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:31,200
Speaker 1: scrubbers has like a life changing car sickness remedy.

1152
00:55:31,920 --> 00:55:34,920
Speaker 4: Oh, I'd be very interested to hear some of those possibilities.

1153
00:55:34,960 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 2: Sure, yeah, they I would too, because I get pretty

1154
00:55:37,040 --> 00:55:38,200
Speaker 2: carsick myself.

1155
00:55:38,920 --> 00:55:40,319
Speaker 4: A private jet. That would be great too.

1156
00:55:41,520 --> 00:55:46,960
Speaker 1: That's an option, and Tanya will give us an update

1157
00:55:47,000 --> 00:55:49,240
Speaker 1: on her new detergent change.

1158
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:53,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm actually gonna google good ones now.

1159
00:55:53,200 --> 00:55:55,759
Speaker 1: Tied Actually I usually tied one. An I've used the

1160
00:55:55,800 --> 00:55:57,960
Speaker 1: arm and Hammer one. It's just like clean and Gentle

1161
00:55:58,040 --> 00:56:00,160
Speaker 1: or something, is the what you need.

1162
00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:02,719
Speaker 5: We use tag Clean and Gentle at our house and

1163
00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:06,080
Speaker 5: it's I have not had a zero ut I is zero,

1164
00:56:06,239 --> 00:56:10,440
Speaker 5: so really say that way. Yeah, we use the freakrance

1165
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:13,480
Speaker 5: free natural stuff and it's great. My clothes smell delightful

1166
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:14,920
Speaker 5: and everyone's happy.

1167
00:56:15,280 --> 00:56:15,480
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1168
00:56:15,560 --> 00:56:17,480
Speaker 2: I literally can't believe I haven't thought of that.

1169
00:56:17,560 --> 00:56:17,839
Speaker 4: I know.

1170
00:56:17,960 --> 00:56:21,360
Speaker 1: Okay, well, I will say there is one. Sometimes the

1171
00:56:21,560 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 1: Clean and Gentle has no smell, so then your clothes

1172
00:56:24,680 --> 00:56:27,160
Speaker 1: don't smell fresh, which was a problem for me. They

1173
00:56:27,200 --> 00:56:30,640
Speaker 1: have a Clean and Gentle that smells good, So make

1174
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:32,960
Speaker 1: sure you. I'll send you the link because it is important.

1175
00:56:33,080 --> 00:56:33,439
Speaker 2: I does.

1176
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:35,400
Speaker 1: I don't. I have to look at it might be.

1177
00:56:35,480 --> 00:56:37,080
Speaker 1: I think it might be arm and Hammer.

1178
00:56:37,600 --> 00:56:39,400
Speaker 2: I know, And I use all that kind of stuff

1179
00:56:39,400 --> 00:56:41,520
Speaker 2: like fabric softener and like all that's.

1180
00:56:41,560 --> 00:56:45,000
Speaker 1: Oh, you're just a you are like a what is

1181
00:56:45,040 --> 00:56:45,759
Speaker 1: it called.

1182
00:56:46,560 --> 00:56:49,560
Speaker 2: Like a just putting chemicals at Mythra.

1183
00:56:50,040 --> 00:56:52,279
Speaker 1: It's the hotbed of chemicals.

1184
00:56:52,680 --> 00:56:55,399
Speaker 5: Juste while you're at it, like my good.

1185
00:56:58,239 --> 00:57:02,920
Speaker 1: All right, well, love you all, have a great week

1186
00:57:03,160 --> 00:57:05,360
Speaker 1: and we'll be back next Monday.

1187
00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:07,640
Speaker 2: Love you guys.

1188
00:57:07,840 --> 00:57:10,320
Speaker 1: Bye,