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Speaker 1: If you don't understand money, you're never going to make

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Speaker 1: more of it because understanding money is like speaking a language.

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Speaker 1: How are you going to speak to somebody in Spanish

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Speaker 1: and had communicate and win at that relationship if you

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Speaker 1: guys don't speak the same language. So I want people

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Speaker 1: to speak the language of money. Let me tell you,

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Speaker 1: like one way to know if you're financially literate today,

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Speaker 1: do you really understand the difference between debit and credit

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Speaker 1: cards and why you should really never be using debit cards?

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Speaker 2: The Number one Health and well Inness podcast.

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Speaker 1: Jay Setti, Jay Shetty sly Set.

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Speaker 2: Hey everyone, welcome back to on Purpose, the place you

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Speaker 2: come to become the happier, healthier and more healed. Today's

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Speaker 2: guest was one of your favorites of the last twelve months.

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Speaker 2: Her episode blew up on audio, crushed it on video,

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Speaker 2: and I'm so excited to have her back because the

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Speaker 2: words you used to describe her were this is so practical,

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Speaker 2: this is so simple, this is so easy. Thank you,

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Speaker 2: thank you, thank you, thank you. That's all I saw

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Speaker 2: in the comments. We had to bring her back, and

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Speaker 2: we're so lucky that we could. I'm speaking about the one,

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Speaker 2: the only Cody Sanchez, entrepreneur, investor, founder of Contrarian Thinking,

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Speaker 2: a platform that helps people achieve financial freedom by acquiring

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Speaker 2: overlooked cash flowing businesses. Formerly a journalist and Wall Street investor,

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Speaker 2: Cody now leads a global community focused on ownership, unconventional investing,

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Speaker 2: and thinking differently about money. Through her platforms, including the

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Speaker 2: best selling book Main Street Millionaire. If you don't have

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Speaker 2: a copy, go and grab one. Cody has built a

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Speaker 2: community of over four million people, teaching them how to

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Speaker 2: think critically, invest wisely, and own their financial future. Please

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Speaker 2: welcome back to On Purpose, Cody Sanchez.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be here, Cody.

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Speaker 2: It's great to have you back. And you know what's

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Speaker 2: really fun is when you met someone, you hit it off,

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Speaker 2: and then you're hanging out again. It just feels like

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Speaker 2: normal and easy and how it I want to start

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Speaker 2: with something that I think everything everyone's thinking about fascinated

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Speaker 2: by it because a lot of us start to believe

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Speaker 2: the media and we read articles, we see the news,

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Speaker 2: we see headlines, and we assume that now is not

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Speaker 2: a great time to make money, and we keep saying

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Speaker 2: things like when the market's better, when the market shifts

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Speaker 2: it's a terrible time to buy property. It's a terrible time.

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Speaker 2: And the funny thing is that rhetoric just continues. So

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Speaker 2: what should people think about right now when it comes

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Speaker 2: to money.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, first I think you got to be honest

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Speaker 1: about the fact there's heart out there and that it's real.

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Speaker 1: Like all the things that you're feeling about money and

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Speaker 1: finance right now are real. Wages have been the same

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Speaker 1: really since you know, you and I were born. It

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Speaker 1: hasn't really increased. Yeah, I mean, you know, if you

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Speaker 1: go back and you go to let's say, back to

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Speaker 1: Dave Ramsey's days, who is a friend and I think

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Speaker 1: highly of. But if you go back to Dave Ramsey

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Speaker 1: when Dave was working, he would tell you today that

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Speaker 1: you should buy a house. That's the number one thing

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Speaker 1: that you should do. You should own a house, you

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Speaker 1: should own your property. Well, the problem with that today

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Speaker 1: is that our wages have increased two x in his lifetime,

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Speaker 1: but housing prices, well they've increased by nine x in

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Speaker 1: his lifetime, and so you cannot really afford the same

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Speaker 1: things that the previous generation thought of. Is totally normal,

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Speaker 1: and so their construct might not work for our generation.

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Speaker 1: So one I think it's important to realize that it

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Speaker 1: is hard out there. Second though, is I think we

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Speaker 1: got to go back to what Warren Buffett says, which

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Speaker 1: is be fearful when others are greedy, and greedy when

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Speaker 1: others are fearful, and it's really hard to do. It

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Speaker 1: hurts in our gut. But today, all around us, things

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Speaker 1: are starting to go on sale, and what we have

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Speaker 1: to try to do is figure out during this time period,

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Speaker 1: how can I start to get a little piece of it.

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Speaker 1: Housing prices in Austin are down thirty percent. This is

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Speaker 1: really just since I bought a house a year ago,

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Speaker 1: and so there is actually sales happening all around us,

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Speaker 1: and I think we got to be prepared for it.

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Speaker 1: But before we can buy things, we got to have

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Speaker 1: enough money to do it, and we got we got

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Speaker 1: to kind of know a little bit about money in

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Speaker 1: order to make more of it. So I think we

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Speaker 1: should talk about too. Yes it's hard right now, Yes

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Speaker 1: things are in sale. You are not crazy, but you

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Speaker 1: can make money in any market. And one of my

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Speaker 1: favorite quotes from Baron Rothschild, one of the richest guys

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Speaker 1: in the world, you know, creator of industry in the

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Speaker 1: US is by when there's blood in the streets, even

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Speaker 1: and especially when the blood is your own. And so

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Speaker 1: that is a hard visual way to realize that actually

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Speaker 1: real money is made when the market feels tough.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So actually, right now, even though the market is tough,

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Speaker 2: we shouldn't be discouraged and waiting for the market to

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Speaker 2: be good. This should be the time that we actually

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Speaker 2: doubled down and listen to your advice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, think about it. I was looking at

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Speaker 1: an NFT yesterday that was sold for sixty million dollars

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Speaker 1: in the height of the NFT land. It is worth

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Speaker 1: nineteen thousand dollars today, sixty million to nineteen thousand. It

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Speaker 1: felt good during that time, didn't it. Everybody was like,

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Speaker 1: we're making money, We've got all this extra stuff. But

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Speaker 1: what actually happened is we bought things at overpriced assets

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Speaker 1: and now we're left with assets that are underpriced. The

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Speaker 1: opposite happens in this market. And so right now is

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Speaker 1: the time I think to put up your little spider

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Speaker 1: sense and start saying, well, everybody else is panicking, where

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Speaker 1: can I start to make some smart moves? Because there's

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Speaker 1: always money and opportunities, But definitely you want to buy

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Speaker 1: when things are on sale.

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Speaker 2: Should people even be dreaming or thinking about wanting to

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Speaker 2: own a home anymore?

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Speaker 1: I think that owning a home as an investment right

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Speaker 1: now today is mathematically not a smart decision. For the

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Speaker 1: first time in my lifetime, the numbers say that homes

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Speaker 1: today will you have an interest rate of five to

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Speaker 1: eight percent, You have a three million home shortage in

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Speaker 1: the US, you have flat wages, and you have this

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Speaker 1: increase of home prices. The math us is a math

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Speaker 1: in and so today I don't think you should feel

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Speaker 1: like you're not an adult, you don't live the American dream,

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Speaker 1: you're a failure. If you don't buy a house. You

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Speaker 1: might actually just be really financially intelligent rent and go

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Speaker 1: negotiate your rent prices right now, by the way, because

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of excess in the market. They want

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Speaker 1: to keep you, and you might actually be making an

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Speaker 1: incredibly smart financial decision. And so don't let people make

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Speaker 1: you feel bad if you're not doing what the American

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Speaker 1: dream adult thing used to be. The market's changed.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you've already shared some really powerful advice for right now,

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Speaker 2: given the idea that now is a great time to

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Speaker 2: go and negotiate your rent. Now's a great time to

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Speaker 2: go and think about finding places to potentially purchase property

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Speaker 2: if you are what should be people thinking about doing

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Speaker 2: right now when it comes to making money that you

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Speaker 2: couldn't have been doing a year ago. That's very different now.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great question. Well, first, what I would

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Speaker 1: think about today is I think you got to first

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Speaker 1: understand some like baseline financial literacy. And you and I

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Speaker 1: were talking about this. You know, they say the average

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Speaker 1: American reads at a sixth grade reading level. They say

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Speaker 1: the average American actually understands finances at about a high

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Speaker 1: school level. So we're taught, and you remember this in

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Speaker 1: high school, we're taught all the way up to like

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Speaker 1: budgeting like back in our day. Probably the kids will

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Speaker 1: do it this way anymore. But you used to have

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Speaker 1: checkbooks right now and everybody knows how old I was,

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Speaker 1: and you have to like balance your checkbook and how

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Speaker 1: do you do that a little ledger? That's actually where

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Speaker 1: we're capped. And so I think first what I want

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Speaker 1: people to do is realize that if you don't understand money,

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Speaker 1: you're never going to make more of it, because understanding

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Speaker 1: money is like speaking a language. How are you going

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Speaker 1: to speak to somebody in Spanish and communicate and win

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Speaker 1: at that relationship? If you guys don't speak the same language,

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Speaker 1: it's very hard, right, So I want people to speak

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Speaker 1: the language of money. So I think about this in

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Speaker 1: like small ways. Let me tell you, like one way

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Speaker 1: to know if you're financially literate today. One way might be,

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Speaker 1: do you really understand the difference between debit and credit

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Speaker 1: cards and why you should really never be using debit cards.

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Speaker 1: Everybody talks these days about how credit cards are bad, right, Well,

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Speaker 1: credit cards are bad if you don't pay off your

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Speaker 1: payment every single month, if you allow big interest rates

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Speaker 1: to stockpile, and if you use it as a I

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Speaker 1: want things as opposed to I need things. Credit cards

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Speaker 1: are bad, but debit cards are actually worse. They don't

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Speaker 1: allow you to build credit, and credit good credit in

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Speaker 1: this country is the underpinning of wealth. Debit cards do

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Speaker 1: not allow that. They also don't give you any points

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Speaker 1: or perks or cash back, and then you're less protected

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Speaker 1: actually with a debit card. So if somebody steals your

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Speaker 1: debit card and goes and charges things, the bank goes,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, that's your money, don't really care. If

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Speaker 1: you go and you charge a bunch of things on

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Speaker 1: your credit card and there's fraud, what do you do?

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Speaker 1: Two clicks? They erase it, right, they ship you a

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Speaker 1: new card. And so I think this generation was so

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Speaker 1: tormented by credit is bad, debt is bad. Don't have it? Well,

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Speaker 1: the people who are the richest in the world, they

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Speaker 1: all have some debt, just good debt as opposed to

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Speaker 1: bad debt. So where I want you, guys to start

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Speaker 1: is actually before you even think of making more money,

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Speaker 1: let's understand the language of money, right.

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Speaker 2: So glad we're stying there. It's brilliant. And I had

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Speaker 2: personal experience of this. So I grew up in London,

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Speaker 2: where it's not the same setup, similar, but it's not

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Speaker 2: exactly the same. The whole structure is not based on

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Speaker 2: credit as strongly, and I was trained to believe you

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Speaker 2: only use a debit card, and so I used that

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Speaker 2: my whole life. When I came to the US and

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Speaker 2: I moved here. For the first year I lived or

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Speaker 2: I only lived, and I didn't have a lot of money,

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Speaker 2: so I was living just on a debit card. And

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Speaker 2: then when I wanted to finally get a car, I

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Speaker 2: was thinking about, you know, having an apartment, whatever it was.

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Speaker 2: I couldn't get anything because I had no credit score.

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Speaker 2: My credit score was like nonexistent, and it hit me

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Speaker 2: like a ton of bricks because I couldn't believe it

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Speaker 2: that I'd finally done good with my life, but I

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Speaker 2: couldn't actually exercise any of it. So walk me through

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Speaker 2: the myths about credit cards and debit cards that people

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Speaker 2: can solve right now. Is there a special credit card

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Speaker 2: they should be getting, is there one that's better? What

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Speaker 2: should they be looking out for? What does APR mean?

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Speaker 2: You know, walk me through the hidden things buying credit

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Speaker 2: cards that we all feel stupid about. When you see

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Speaker 2: an ad and you're like, I have no idea what

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Speaker 2: that means.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so true.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 1: I had an employee, actually Christian, who's in from the

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Speaker 1: UK too, and we were ridiculing him merstally actually because

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Speaker 1: he only had a debit card to pay for things,

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Speaker 1: and I didn't even know that the U K was

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Speaker 1: completely different.

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Speaker 2: No, they're all credit cards, but it's not he said,

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Speaker 2: it's not normal.

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Speaker 1: I was like, you're a twenty eight year old man.

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Speaker 1: You don't have a credit card. He was like, you

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Speaker 1: need to travel more Cody, and I was like, sorry,

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Speaker 1: but then we got him a credit card so he

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Speaker 1: could start establishing credit here. But more of the story

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Speaker 1: is here's I think the couple first steps to financial freedom.

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Speaker 1: You know, if you want to set up your kid

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Speaker 1: for success, you actually want them to get a credit

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Speaker 1: card really early. Does it so much matter what type

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Speaker 1: of credit card. I'm not like the points guy, where

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Speaker 1: I like to operationalize and optimize every aspect of a

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Speaker 1: credit card. I think that is almost more work than

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Speaker 1: trying to make more money. But I think if you

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Speaker 1: go from any of the major banks, there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of rules around credit cards, so they're really not

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Speaker 1: allowed to mess with you so much on interest rates.

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Speaker 1: There's a lot of protections for consumers, so it don't

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Speaker 1: stress too much about which one. Which one seems like

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Speaker 1: it has some night perks for you and you can

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Speaker 1: get the most amount of money that you need. Cool.

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Speaker 1: So that's step one. And if you can do that

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Speaker 1: for your kids when they're in high school, they will

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Speaker 1: actually have more access to the first pillar I think

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Speaker 1: of wealth, which is resources. We all know what's the

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Speaker 1: saying takes money to make money, right, And so if

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Speaker 1: you come from nothing. Well, you can start actually building

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Speaker 1: up your resource pile just from your credit, which you

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Speaker 1: can start at a young age. You don't need to

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Speaker 1: be rich to do that. And then after resources, you

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Speaker 1: pile on knowledge. Right, the rich pass on how to invest.

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Speaker 1: We need to start doing that to our next generation.

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Speaker 1: Then you pass on wealth accumulation. That's where you start

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Speaker 1: to pile on your own money. And then finally you

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Speaker 1: pass on the ability to invest to continue to move

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Speaker 1: cyclically your money around and make it work for you.

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Speaker 1: But that's where I would start. It's like you start

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Speaker 1: with a credit card. You have a debit card really

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Speaker 1: just because you want to get cash out sometimes if

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Speaker 1: you go into the club and buying drinks or whatever

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Speaker 1: people do these days that are cooler than me. And

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Speaker 1: that's where I would start, and then I would move

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Speaker 1: to this next level of Okay, if I have some credit,

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Speaker 1: now we need to focus on earning. So how do

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Speaker 1: I make more money? But I think most people skip

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Speaker 1: that first step because credit is scary, and like listen,

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Speaker 1: Charlie Munger, Warren Buffett's partner, obviously very famous dude. But

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Speaker 1: here's a line I love, which is men only go

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Speaker 1: broke by three things, and it's whiskey women and leverage,

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Speaker 1: and leverage means debt, right. Warren Buffett gave him a

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Speaker 1: little adage to it at the end, and he goes,

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Speaker 1: I think, actually, what my friend meant to say was

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Speaker 1: really just the last one. It's really just leverage. And

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Speaker 1: Warren Buffett, one of the richest guys in the world,

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Speaker 1: said he doesn't like debt. Here's the problem, Jay, He's

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Speaker 1: highly levered. He has a massive amount of debt. Why

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Speaker 1: because he has debt on assets and other people's things

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Speaker 1: as opposed to personal guarantees on his own. He's not

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Speaker 1: mortgaging his house to buy these companies. He is raising

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Speaker 1: debt on a company in order for it to make

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Speaker 1: more money. And So if you don't understand all that

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Speaker 1: right now, that's where I want you to dive in

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Speaker 1: a little bit more. Maybe you can start with a

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Speaker 1: debitan into credit card.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. No, I think it's so important to understand debt.

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Speaker 2: And you see that when you see a celebrity buy

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Speaker 2: a new home and you realize they borrowed to buy

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Speaker 2: that home. They didn't buy it in cash, even though

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Speaker 2: they have the cash, and it's a available to them.

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Speaker 2: And I think that idea is so foreign. So if

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Speaker 2: someone's thinking about starying a business right now, well wants

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Speaker 2: to grow a business, And the number one thing you

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Speaker 2: hear is, well, I don't have any money. I don't

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Speaker 2: have to fund it. How much do you actually need

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Speaker 2: to start a business?

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Speaker 1: I think you never suffer from a lack of money.

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Speaker 1: You suffer from a lack of knowledge on how to

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Speaker 1: get money. The richest people in the world they never

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Speaker 1: use their own money entirely to buy things. And if

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Speaker 1: you can like sit on that for a second and

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Speaker 1: let that sit in, then I think you can really

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Speaker 1: open up your eyes to the fact that all around

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Speaker 1: you there are deals right now, and there is money

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Speaker 1: that is waiting for the actually rarest of things, which

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Speaker 1: is a human who wants to work really hard and

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Speaker 1: has a good idea where to put the money. And

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Speaker 1: so you actually don't need money to start a business.

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Speaker 1: I don't think you need it at all. What you

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Speaker 1: need is some access to it. And so you know,

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Speaker 1: next week I'm going to the SBA, the Small Business Administration,

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Speaker 1: and they just ran out all of these new programs

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Speaker 1: for new business owners where they will one do grants

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Speaker 1: where they give you money and grant means you take

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Speaker 1: this money, you don't have to give it back. The

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Speaker 1: government is going to give it to you, maybe because

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Speaker 1: you're a minority or a woman or have a core

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Speaker 1: needs business. They also do a ton of loans. You know,

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Speaker 1: they'll loan you ninety percent of the purchase price of

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Speaker 1: a business if you need one. And all around us

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Speaker 1: are also people who want to invest and so like

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Speaker 1: there's a website called percent and on percent. If you

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Speaker 1: have a small business and you need some debt for

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Speaker 1: a small business, you can actually get debt from your

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Speaker 1: small business through you know website. But I think the

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Speaker 1: most important part is not just tactically, It's like, can

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Speaker 1: I change my belief to believe that money is all

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Speaker 1: around me and I do not need to have only

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Speaker 1: my own money in order to get rich, and I

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Speaker 1: want more people to think that way. It's hard, I

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Speaker 1: get it.

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Speaker 2: Do you think everyone needs a side us right now?

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Speaker 1: I have two thoughts. One, I do not believe that

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Speaker 1: you have to go all in on the thing that

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Speaker 1: you want to do in life. I think that is

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Speaker 1: told to you by people who had survivorship bias. Like

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Speaker 1: it worked for me, so it's going to work for

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Speaker 1: you and what do we know to be true? Ninety

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Speaker 1: percent of startups fail over any five year period, and

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Speaker 1: so I actually think that the way to never have

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Speaker 1: risk in building a business. If you want to do

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Speaker 1: a startup and have no risk, I think you keep

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Speaker 1: your job. You do really well at that job while

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Speaker 1: you're doing it, you use your salary to fund your

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Speaker 1: side hustle or your next venture. You keep moving forward

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Speaker 1: on it until your side hustle matches the cost of living,

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Speaker 1: that you have your cash flow, and then you leave

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Speaker 1: your business or your job to go start your business

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Speaker 1: once you have enough money from inflow of the business.

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Speaker 1: And I think we've told too many people and idealized

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Speaker 1: this idea of entrepreneurship when in fact, you know, I

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Speaker 1: had three or four businesses fail. If I had just

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Speaker 1: left my job that paid me good money, I would

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Speaker 1: have been sleeping on somebody's couch. And so you can

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Speaker 1: have a side hustle, but please keep it on the

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Speaker 1: side for a minute until you make sure it's not

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Speaker 1: just a passion project it is a profit project.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, And I think that's dismised wisest advice. I'm

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Speaker 2: in the same boat when I started doing what I

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Speaker 2: do today. I had a full time job. It didn't

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Speaker 2: pay great, but it paid enough to get buy It

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Speaker 2: paid my bills. It means it means I wasn't creating

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Speaker 2: from a place of stress. And when you're creating something

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Speaker 2: new from just stress, it can be quite dehabilitating. Now,

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Speaker 2: sometimes stress can be the greatest motivator. It can propel you,

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Speaker 2: it can be your launch pad, but you've got to

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Speaker 2: kind of get it right. Too much stress and you

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Speaker 2: fall apart. Too little stress and you stay in the

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Speaker 2: golden handcuffs.

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Speaker 1: That's right.

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Speaker 2: And I think that's where I see a lot of

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Speaker 2: people stuck today. Is I meet a lot of people

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Speaker 2: who I feel have tied on the golden handcuffs but

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Speaker 2: not using that as the investment. So it's like, I

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Speaker 2: want to have a lifestyle with the money I make,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to use it to build a new life.

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Speaker 2: Does that make sense?

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Speaker 1: Yes? Well, I mean, and you know, there's a lot

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Speaker 1: of data out there that actually backs that. There was

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Speaker 1: a study that was done on should you leave your

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Speaker 1: job to do a startup or should you stay in

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Speaker 1: your job and do your startup at the side, And

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Speaker 1: what the data tells us from hundreds of individuals that

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Speaker 1: went through this is you have a thirty three percent

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Speaker 1: higher likelihood of your startup succeeding if you have an

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Speaker 1: income source while doing it, because we make better decisions

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Speaker 1: when we're not in flight or fight, when we can

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Speaker 1: actually sort of downregulate. You know all about this, thankfully,

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Speaker 1: there's so many tools like what you do that teach

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Speaker 1: people how to downregulate, and sometimes you can't control it.

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Speaker 1: But if you can control that, your decision making is

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Speaker 1: better by keeping an income source. Oh my gosh, why

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Speaker 1: wouldn't you, Because being a CEO is really, in my opinion,

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Speaker 1: it's like three things. If you want to be a

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Speaker 1: great CEO, it is number one, you have to be

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Speaker 1: able to sell a dream so big that other talent

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Speaker 1: wants to come alongside you they think that their vision

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Speaker 1: is bigger under yours. Then number two, you have to

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Speaker 1: make great diagnoses what's happening in the world around us,

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Speaker 1: just like a doctor would to understand what's good or bad.

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Speaker 1: And then you have to have great decision making on

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Speaker 1: top of the diagnoses. And so if you can hire

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Speaker 1: great talent diagnose well, but you make bad decisions because

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Speaker 1: you're scared. That's not going to lead to the successful startup.

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Speaker 2: In my experience, I love those top three qualities of CEO.

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Speaker 2: I wanted to ask you the opposite. What allows an

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Speaker 2: employee to be great and make more money as an employee?

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Speaker 1: If you want to make more money as an employee.

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Speaker 1: Number one, you have to understand how much money you

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Speaker 1: make the company today. If you don't understand what your

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Speaker 1: value dollar amount is you bring into your business, you

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Speaker 1: should probably go talk to your boss and say, hey,

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Speaker 1: I'd like to understand how I make you money. If

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Speaker 1: you had to quantify how I make you money, could

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Speaker 1: you help me understand that. One your boss is gonna

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Speaker 1: be like, this is amazing, nobody's ever asked me this before.

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Speaker 1: And then two, Once you understand that, you need to

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Speaker 1: figure out how could I make more money for the company.

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Speaker 1: Once you can understand how you can make more money,

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Speaker 1: you can say, well, what do you think the profits

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Speaker 1: of this business are? If we bring in one hundred

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Speaker 1: dollars sale, do we keep twenty bucks of it? And

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Speaker 1: if I figure that out, then I can go, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I made you one hundred bucks, we kept twenty of it.

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Speaker 1: If I do that, could I keep five of that twenty?

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Speaker 1: I brought you and then you actually know how to

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Speaker 1: negotiate for your salary. And a lot of times this

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Speaker 1: isn't always possible if you're in a big corporate job,

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Speaker 1: but more often than not, there is money available for

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Speaker 1: those who understand how to ask for it because they've

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Speaker 1: earned it.

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Speaker 2: I love that that step by step process is so

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Speaker 2: brilliant because you're so right. If someone ever came up

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Speaker 2: to me and said, how do I make money? And

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Speaker 2: how do I make you more money? Yeah, oh my gosh,

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Speaker 2: it's like the best thing ever because it's so often

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Speaker 2: not thought about and you don't realize. And like you said,

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Speaker 2: there may be certain companies where you can't have that conversation,

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Speaker 2: but today I feel like there's just so many more

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Speaker 2: spaces to actually have that connection that you.

435
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:35,000
Speaker 1: Can yeah, you know, and think about it from your

436
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,760
Speaker 1: boss's perspective, like they hires you for a reason because

437
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,280
Speaker 1: they thought that you would make their life easier and

438
00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:43,600
Speaker 1: that you would make the business better. And I think

439
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:47,639
Speaker 1: a lot of times you leave your job before you

440
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,560
Speaker 1: get all of the money out of your job you

441
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:52,800
Speaker 1: could have, and I did this so often in the beginning.

442
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,080
Speaker 1: I think you'd make way more money if you thought

443
00:19:56,119 --> 00:19:58,879
Speaker 1: that you could have a conversation with your boss and say, man,

444
00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,760
Speaker 1: this isn't exact working how I thought it would be.

445
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:04,000
Speaker 1: I think I could be of use over here as well.

446
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:08,199
Speaker 1: I'd love some additional responsibility here, maybe less here. You know,

447
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:09,720
Speaker 1: could I make you more money over here? If I

448
00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:13,000
Speaker 1: prove myself here? Could we do less here? You leave

449
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,800
Speaker 1: the devil that you know for the devil that you

450
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:18,880
Speaker 1: don't often, and when that happens, I think you actually

451
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:21,080
Speaker 1: lose more money than you anticipate. It used to be

452
00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,480
Speaker 1: back in the day, you made about twenty to twenty

453
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 1: five percent more money every time you job hopped to

454
00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:30,000
Speaker 1: the next job. These days, I actually think that there

455
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:32,800
Speaker 1: is a real value you can have to increase your

456
00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:36,000
Speaker 1: salary or overall pay by more like twenty five to

457
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,439
Speaker 1: fifty percent if you stay and you diagnose as opposed

458
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:42,920
Speaker 1: to you skip, and then you guess yes. And so

459
00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:46,159
Speaker 1: I would highly recommend that you not do what I

460
00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:48,840
Speaker 1: did at the beginning of my career, which was skip, skip, skip,

461
00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,760
Speaker 1: and never give the place a chance to pay me more. Yeah,

462
00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 1: because they might want.

463
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 2: To absolutely And what you miss when you skip is

464
00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:03,159
Speaker 2: you actually miss the skills of negotiating, upmanaging, learning new

465
00:21:03,359 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 2: skills and abilities at that place. You're so right, and

466
00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:08,480
Speaker 2: it's so I mean, you're so vulnerable for even saying that,

467
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:12,320
Speaker 2: because you know you've done so phenomenally well. But it's

468
00:21:12,359 --> 00:21:15,360
Speaker 2: such a good lesson for people to understand because in

469
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:19,960
Speaker 2: the carrot of a couple of extra whatever it may be,

470
00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:23,400
Speaker 2: you're moving across, but you're actually losing the skills. One

471
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:26,160
Speaker 2: thing I painted up recently which I haven't fully presented

472
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 2: to my team yet, but it's been something i've been

473
00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:31,440
Speaker 2: putting together for how and I know you have something

474
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:32,639
Speaker 2: on this too, so I want to share mine with

475
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:34,440
Speaker 2: you to get your thoughts on it. I've been building

476
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:38,320
Speaker 2: this framework of how to talk to my team about

477
00:21:38,359 --> 00:21:42,840
Speaker 2: what helps you grow at the company, and I used

478
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:48,000
Speaker 2: a very very simple analogy and metaphor of beginning at

479
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,919
Speaker 2: the bricklayer. So the bricklayer is usually at the level

480
00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:54,439
Speaker 2: with which you come in, and the bricklayer knows I

481
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,200
Speaker 2: have to lay this brick and I've got to lay

482
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,080
Speaker 2: it next to this one, and I know the pattern,

483
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,960
Speaker 2: and I can lay a brick. Maybe I can build

484
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:04,399
Speaker 2: a wall. Maybe the next level up is a builder

485
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 2: you actually know how to build a wall. You know

486
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,120
Speaker 2: how to paint the wall, you know how to put

487
00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:12,280
Speaker 2: up scaffolding, you know how to connect walls. You can

488
00:22:12,280 --> 00:22:15,680
Speaker 2: do a bit more, and you're a builder. Above from

489
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:19,600
Speaker 2: that is something I call the architect. Now, the architect

490
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,520
Speaker 2: is not just good at building a wall. They could

491
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:24,880
Speaker 2: actually go and build me and design me a new

492
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:28,400
Speaker 2: part of the business, an extension of something, a new idea,

493
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:30,520
Speaker 2: And that's how I want people to grow. And then

494
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:32,960
Speaker 2: the highest stage that have come to is the city planner.

495
00:22:33,359 --> 00:22:36,680
Speaker 2: This person's not just building me one home. They're planning

496
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:40,040
Speaker 2: the whole city, of the ecosystem of how everything falls

497
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 2: into place. And so I'm communicating this to my team

498
00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:44,760
Speaker 2: now because I'm like, I want all of you to

499
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:49,800
Speaker 2: graduate from bricklayers to builders, to architects to city planners.

500
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 2: And that is what's attached to more money. It's not

501
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:58,240
Speaker 2: more effort. It's not more work. It's not being more busy,

502
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,679
Speaker 2: it's not doing more stuff off. These will come with

503
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,760
Speaker 2: a different type of vision, They come with a different

504
00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:07,200
Speaker 2: strategic element, they come with more care, they come with

505
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:10,159
Speaker 2: a wider scope. It isn't just about oh but I

506
00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:12,840
Speaker 2: worked more hours this year or I put in more time.

507
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:14,439
Speaker 2: Didn't you see how much effort I put in? And

508
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:18,679
Speaker 2: I think those things don't necessarily result in more successful

509
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:20,440
Speaker 2: a company. What's your thoughts on that?

510
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:24,600
Speaker 1: I think it's perfect one. You know, we all want

511
00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:28,320
Speaker 1: to feel like we can see a future at an organization,

512
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:31,320
Speaker 1: and I think we all want to make money, but

513
00:23:31,359 --> 00:23:33,120
Speaker 1: we also really want to know that we're getting better

514
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:34,880
Speaker 1: and we want to know that we're going to get

515
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,760
Speaker 1: rewarded for all the hard work we're going to put

516
00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 1: in over the long term. And so if you can

517
00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 1: show people a vision for the future, I think that's incredible.

518
00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:44,920
Speaker 1: I totally agree. We also talk about it as and

519
00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:47,679
Speaker 1: this isn't quite the same because the up bricklayer is

520
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:51,280
Speaker 1: in many ways just as important as the city planner.

521
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:53,639
Speaker 1: And so one other way we talk about it is

522
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:56,200
Speaker 1: called the NPC ladder, and we sort of talk about

523
00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,280
Speaker 1: you know how there are video games, right, and in

524
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,640
Speaker 1: the video games you have the NPCs, which are sort

525
00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:02,520
Speaker 1: of these people that sort of stay in the same

526
00:24:02,520 --> 00:24:04,720
Speaker 1: spot and repeat the same things, like you know, find

527
00:24:04,760 --> 00:24:08,840
Speaker 1: the dragon, find the dragon, and some people choose to

528
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:11,040
Speaker 1: kind of stay in the same spot and to stay

529
00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:13,399
Speaker 1: as an NPC for much of their life and not

530
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,240
Speaker 1: to move to each level of the game where you

531
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: become not the main character. Next you're a supporting cast member,

532
00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:20,199
Speaker 1: you know, and then you might be one of the

533
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:22,440
Speaker 1: main characters, and then you might be the protagonist, et cetera.

534
00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:24,800
Speaker 1: And so at the very top of my best performers,

535
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,439
Speaker 1: where I say the people who will be paid the

536
00:24:26,480 --> 00:24:30,400
Speaker 1: most maybe eventually get equity, well, they're the main characters.

537
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:34,240
Speaker 1: And that means that they actually change the script, they

538
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:37,280
Speaker 1: move forward the company overall. And so I love that,

539
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:40,440
Speaker 1: and I think, you know, for most of us, there's

540
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 1: a saying that you don't leave bad jobs, you leave

541
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,640
Speaker 1: bad leaders, and so I like to try to remember

542
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:48,160
Speaker 1: that often in my companies that when somebody leaves, that's

543
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:50,919
Speaker 1: a reflection on me and my team, that they didn't

544
00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:53,040
Speaker 1: see a way for them to become a city planner,

545
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:54,639
Speaker 1: and that they didn't see a way for them to

546
00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:58,160
Speaker 1: come to the next level. I do think about that often.

547
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 2: It's almost like it's a validation of all of these

548
00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 2: are needed. But there's a ladder, yeah, and the ladder

549
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,600
Speaker 2: isn't just more time and more work now, which often

550
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:09,280
Speaker 2: is the mistake.

551
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,720
Speaker 1: Well, I think you're you're really right. I mean, today,

552
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 1: I think there's a culture of there's a hustle culture

553
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:17,640
Speaker 1: that happens about hard work will equal wealth, and that

554
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,160
Speaker 1: is actually not true at all. And we have seen

555
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:22,480
Speaker 1: over time, if hard work would equal wealth, then the

556
00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:24,680
Speaker 1: person who runs my laundromat would make just as much

557
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,199
Speaker 1: as Jeff Bezos. And we know, you know, there's an

558
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:30,359
Speaker 1: incredible video out there that I can't remember who did it,

559
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:33,560
Speaker 1: but it basically shows, for the sixty seconds that Jeff

560
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:35,919
Speaker 1: Bezos is in the video, how much money Jeff Bezos

561
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:38,720
Speaker 1: is making every single second as he walks around the factory.

562
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,359
Speaker 1: And it shows that he makes let's say, I don't

563
00:25:42,359 --> 00:25:46,240
Speaker 1: know x millions of dollars per second. And so by

564
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:49,360
Speaker 1: the time my laundromat owner has picked up his coffee

565
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:51,760
Speaker 1: put it in his mouth, Jeff Bezos has already lapped

566
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 1: him multiple times for the year. Now, why Jeff doesn't

567
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:57,359
Speaker 1: work as hard as the guy who's laying actual bricks

568
00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:00,280
Speaker 1: or actually cleaning the roof. And so I think we

569
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,679
Speaker 1: have to ask ourselves, if this idea of just work harder,

570
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:06,080
Speaker 1: what's your work ethic? That's not true anymore, especially in

571
00:26:06,119 --> 00:26:08,600
Speaker 1: the age of AI. You know, the more I think

572
00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:12,040
Speaker 1: about AI as a total normy, I'm not a big

573
00:26:12,080 --> 00:26:15,639
Speaker 1: tech person. I'm almost like Boomer, incapable in many ways

574
00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:18,119
Speaker 1: with tech. But the more I think about it, the

575
00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:20,960
Speaker 1: more I think it will enable all of us to

576
00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 1: have massive knowledge. And because we'll all have massive knowledge,

577
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:28,200
Speaker 1: we will actually have to perform better because everybody will

578
00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:31,520
Speaker 1: be able to do a mid level execution, very few

579
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:33,720
Speaker 1: people will be able to stand out amongst the noise.

580
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:36,800
Speaker 1: And we're already seeing this forty seven percent increase in

581
00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:40,720
Speaker 1: creators just this year online. So why because it's so

582
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:43,119
Speaker 1: much easier now to go bang bam boom put it

583
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 1: on the internet. So that's going to be everywhere, which

584
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,800
Speaker 1: means that going forward, just doing a lot more, just

585
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 1: working a lot harder, won't be what changes it. What

586
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:55,119
Speaker 1: will taking a moment to look at what do I

587
00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:57,520
Speaker 1: know different than anybody else? How do I increase my

588
00:26:57,560 --> 00:26:59,720
Speaker 1: knowledge stack? And how do I get really creative in

589
00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:03,159
Speaker 1: a world of lack of creativity but mass production? And

590
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:06,160
Speaker 1: so I love to involve Ravikan's line, which was, in

591
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:08,960
Speaker 1: this world today, you don't want to work like a cow.

592
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:11,880
Speaker 1: You don't want to work continuously sort of grazing non

593
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:14,040
Speaker 1: stop like this. You want to be the lion. You

594
00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:17,320
Speaker 1: want to have periods of sprint and rest, sprint and rest,

595
00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:20,160
Speaker 1: and that will be what the top performers do.

596
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:24,040
Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely so, well said. Is passive income a myth?

597
00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:29,040
Speaker 1: Well, passive income is a tax statement. So like the

598
00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:32,680
Speaker 1: actual words passive income versus active income are real per

599
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:35,439
Speaker 1: the government. But is passive income in the fact that

600
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:38,760
Speaker 1: I will make money if I do nothing, and I

601
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:42,159
Speaker 1: take X amount of risk and X amount of my

602
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:44,320
Speaker 1: money in order to do something. No, that's a total lie.

603
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,280
Speaker 1: And I think anybody who tells you that this will

604
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 1: be completely passive income, there's a red flag, immediate red flag.

605
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:51,440
Speaker 1: I mean, I own a bunch of venting machines. Vening

606
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:54,960
Speaker 1: machines are often something people call passive income. Let me

607
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:57,639
Speaker 1: tell you what's not passive A veny machine. They break

608
00:27:57,720 --> 00:28:01,280
Speaker 1: all the time, people break into them. They don't make

609
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:04,679
Speaker 1: that much money per machine. And also they make a

610
00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: ton of money on aggregate, and they're great for many

611
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:10,919
Speaker 1: things once you have hundreds of them or thousands. But

612
00:28:11,119 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 1: there's no such thing as passive income. And once you

613
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:16,639
Speaker 1: know that, I think you also can recognize do you

614
00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:19,520
Speaker 1: want passive income. Is that what you really want or

615
00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:22,320
Speaker 1: do you just want a job that you love, that

616
00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:25,479
Speaker 1: pays you well, that like lights that fire inside of you.

617
00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:27,720
Speaker 1: I think we want passive income because we hate what

618
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 1: we do, Because eighty seven percent of Americans don't like

619
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:32,520
Speaker 1: what they do for a living. They don't like who

620
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:34,159
Speaker 1: they work with, and so why would they want to

621
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,480
Speaker 1: do more of it? Please give me passive income. But

622
00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:38,400
Speaker 1: I don't think that's actually what we want. We just

623
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 1: want something that really speaks to us.

624
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 2: Before we dive into the next moment, let's hear from

625
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:48,000
Speaker 2: our sponsors and back to our episode. Do you think

626
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:50,720
Speaker 2: people can do what they love and make a lot

627
00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:53,400
Speaker 2: of money or are those ideas disconnected.

628
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 1: I think that anybody tells you you should follow your

629
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:58,240
Speaker 1: passion in order to make money is probably already rich

630
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:02,360
Speaker 1: and it sounds really nice actually, and so they're like,

631
00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:05,440
Speaker 1: of course, follow your passion. Well, even somebody like we

632
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:07,600
Speaker 1: both know some of the founders of Airbnb. You're closer

633
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:09,440
Speaker 1: with them than I am. But like you know Joe

634
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:13,240
Speaker 1: and Austin, he would say that he was incredibly passionate

635
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:17,240
Speaker 1: when he started Airbnb, But was he like passionate about

636
00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:20,400
Speaker 1: I don't know home design of his like you know,

637
00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 1: mattress on the floor, Like, no, what was he passionate about.

638
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,440
Speaker 1: He found some game that he loved to play in

639
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:28,280
Speaker 1: the game of business. And it probably could have been

640
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 1: a lighting company that he had, or a painting company

641
00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 1: or Airbnb. He just learned to love the game. So

642
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,840
Speaker 1: where I think people get it wrong is learn to

643
00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,800
Speaker 1: love the game. Don't try to obsess on your passions.

644
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:42,560
Speaker 1: We try to turn like painting that we do or

645
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 1: underwater basket weaving or whatever our weird hobby is into

646
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:49,240
Speaker 1: our profits. And that's where you go really really wrong.

647
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,160
Speaker 1: And in fact, there's a lot of data to support this.

648
00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:53,880
Speaker 1: I mean, we have something called the Boring Sexy Matrix

649
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:56,720
Speaker 1: that essentially it kind of looks like, you know, two

650
00:29:56,760 --> 00:29:59,120
Speaker 1: lines and then a charted graph that shows you the

651
00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:04,320
Speaker 1: more boring industry, the higher the income, and so especially

652
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 1: in Hollywood. In fact, there's an incredible study that shows

653
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,280
Speaker 1: in SAG after the Hollywood Union, there's one hundred and

654
00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:13,720
Speaker 1: eighty seven I believe, one hundred and eighty seven thousand

655
00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:18,560
Speaker 1: members of this union, and of those, more than eighty

656
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 1: percent of them do not qualify for health insurance, which

657
00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:25,080
Speaker 1: means that they don't make enough money to even qualify

658
00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 1: for health insurance. The average income is like twenty three

659
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:31,960
Speaker 1: thousand dollars for an actor in LA And so what

660
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: does that tell you when you want to try to

661
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 1: be a clooney or you want to try to be,

662
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:39,000
Speaker 1: you know, a famous Brad Pitt. Most people make no

663
00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 1: money from it. You'd be way better off going to finance,

664
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:45,200
Speaker 1: where ninety nine percent of the people earn one hundred

665
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 1: percent of their income from their job than in acting,

666
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 1: in which it appears that less than twenty percent of

667
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:55,720
Speaker 1: people make their full income from this job. And I'm

668
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,520
Speaker 1: not trying to dissuade anybody from doing things that you love.

669
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 1: I might just be pushing to even say, how could

670
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 1: I be more creative about this? Yeah, if I love

671
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 1: to act, where is their money around the world of

672
00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:10,920
Speaker 1: acting that I could go grab and still integrate the two?

673
00:31:11,400 --> 00:31:14,840
Speaker 1: But does it have to be this preordained sexy role?

674
00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:16,720
Speaker 1: And I think the answer is no. You're a perfect

675
00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:19,320
Speaker 1: example of it. That's how podcasts were born, you know.

676
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:21,520
Speaker 1: It was like these people who wanted to maybe have

677
00:31:21,560 --> 00:31:24,760
Speaker 1: talk shows, who wanted to interview people, and we said

678
00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:27,040
Speaker 1: we could do it. Here instead of a studio, and

679
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:28,320
Speaker 1: you change an entire industry.

680
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:30,600
Speaker 2: I wanted to talk show so bad. It's such a

681
00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 2: good example, and I love that. Yeah, who like that was?

682
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:36,840
Speaker 2: You know? I grew up watching Oprah Big fan, and

683
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:39,480
Speaker 2: I was like, how would it be to sit down

684
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:41,400
Speaker 2: with people and to have a talk show and all

685
00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:43,760
Speaker 2: the rest of it. And then you realize no one's

686
00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:46,560
Speaker 2: giving you a talk show, and unless your talk show

687
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:50,000
Speaker 2: is really really significant, no one's making any significant money

688
00:31:50,640 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 2: and no one's giving you a talk show. That's the

689
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 2: reality of it. There's only ever like three daytime talk

690
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:59,440
Speaker 2: show hosts that are successful and maybe three late night

691
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:02,000
Speaker 2: talk show that are successful. And then everyone else, like

692
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 2: you said, same as acting, ninety seven percent of people

693
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 2: nine nine percent of people don't have that. And when

694
00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:11,280
Speaker 2: you do what you love, like, so do I love interviewing,

695
00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:14,200
Speaker 2: Yes I do. But I love the distinction you made

696
00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:17,520
Speaker 2: because I think there's a difference between a hobby and

697
00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:21,000
Speaker 2: a skill. So, and you just said it, You literally

698
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 2: just said it. So I love soccer. Soccer is my

699
00:32:24,280 --> 00:32:27,520
Speaker 2: first love. It's one of my favorite hobbies. I love

700
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,320
Speaker 2: talking about it, I like playing it. I like FIFA,

701
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:34,440
Speaker 2: like on the PlayStation, Xbox, whatever I'm in. If I

702
00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:37,400
Speaker 2: tried to become a soccer player, it would never have happened.

703
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 2: Like I'm not good enough, not even close. And sure

704
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:41,880
Speaker 2: I could have found a way to maybe get into

705
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:44,680
Speaker 2: coaching or maybe whatever. But to be honest, it's a hobby.

706
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:46,680
Speaker 2: It's something I love talking to my friends about that

707
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 2: doesn't have to be the thing that I monetize or

708
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,800
Speaker 2: that I build into my offering to the world. And

709
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,520
Speaker 2: I love the difference because I think when we hear

710
00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:59,200
Speaker 2: the word passion, we confuse hobby for skills, and then

711
00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:01,880
Speaker 2: you go, wait a minute, no, my hobby's painting. I'm

712
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 2: not the best painter. Let me be honest. And I

713
00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 2: think I've never heard someone say that before. I've never

714
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 2: had that clear clarification. So thank you for making that

715
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:10,920
Speaker 2: crystal clear.

716
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's really you know, I heard Michael Dell the

717
00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:15,240
Speaker 1: the it was I think it was in Michael Dell's book.

718
00:33:15,640 --> 00:33:19,240
Speaker 1: He said somebody was asking him why he wanted to

719
00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:21,400
Speaker 1: take his company back because he had kind of had

720
00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 1: it pulled away from him him. Another big investor basically

721
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 1: got into the scuffle and somebody was asking him, why

722
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:29,280
Speaker 1: do you still care about Dell. You're a billionaire many

723
00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:31,480
Speaker 1: times over, you're super successful. Why don't you just let

724
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:34,239
Speaker 1: this go? And he says, I will care about this

725
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 1: company after I am dead. He loves the game. He

726
00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 1: was so obsessed with Dell that you couldn't pry it

727
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 1: out of his cold, dead hands. And I think about

728
00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 1: that often. I think, you know, you couldn't make me retire,

729
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:51,239
Speaker 1: no matter how much money you gave me. Why are

730
00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: there many days where the game of entrepreneurship is so

731
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 1: brutal that I do think what am I doing? I

732
00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:58,200
Speaker 1: don't have to keep doing this? Why do I do it?

733
00:33:58,360 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: But I love the game?

734
00:33:59,280 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 2: Yeah?

735
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:01,720
Speaker 1: And I think if we can instill in more young

736
00:34:01,760 --> 00:34:04,480
Speaker 1: people a love for the game, then they will realize

737
00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 1: that it is the most fun thing that you can

738
00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:09,480
Speaker 1: do when you get a chance. And that's also how

739
00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 1: you know if the thing you're doing is what you

740
00:34:11,680 --> 00:34:15,680
Speaker 1: should be doing. Like famously, when the two Steve Steve

741
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:18,600
Speaker 1: Jobs and Steve Wozniak were first starting out, they were

742
00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:20,520
Speaker 1: at I think it was a Tory the company that

743
00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:22,719
Speaker 1: they were at. Anyway, they're at another tech company and

744
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:26,200
Speaker 1: yeah it was and Jobs. Do you remember the story

745
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,440
Speaker 1: where Jobs said the only way that I'm coming to

746
00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:30,799
Speaker 1: work here is if I can sleep here too. And

747
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 1: the founder, as a normal founder it probably would do,

748
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 1: is like that's weird, No, you can't do that. But

749
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: he realized that they were so good, they were so obsessed,

750
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:42,520
Speaker 1: that their outperformance meant that he should let them be weird,

751
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:43,920
Speaker 1: and so we let them stay there, which was like

752
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:45,960
Speaker 1: a little problematic because I hear Steve was a little smelly.

753
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,520
Speaker 1: But like, top performers are really just people who are

754
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:52,000
Speaker 1: obsessed with the game. It's not that you have to

755
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:54,000
Speaker 1: have crazy IQ, it's not that you have to have

756
00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:56,960
Speaker 1: a crazy skill set. It's really hard to beat the

757
00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:00,280
Speaker 1: compounding thing that is obsession. And I think that's should

758
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:03,040
Speaker 1: open up for some people a realization that you could win.

759
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 1: You could beat a Jay and a Cody if you're

760
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:07,240
Speaker 1: more obsessed with something than we are.

761
00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:10,200
Speaker 2: Oh for sure. And what I've learned is that in

762
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:13,640
Speaker 2: order to love the game, you have to respect the rules.

763
00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:15,080
Speaker 1: Oh and what I.

764
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:17,520
Speaker 2: Found it's like playing Monopoly. Everyone knows Monopoly, so I're

765
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 2: used as an example. It's like playing Monopoly. You know,

766
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 2: you have to have a three set in order to

767
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:27,920
Speaker 2: build homes. Once you build four, homes on one street,

768
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:30,560
Speaker 2: you can then upgrade it for a hotel. That is

769
00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:32,960
Speaker 2: the rule of how Monopoly works. Now, you play with

770
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:34,960
Speaker 2: some people and they'll say, well, I don't like that.

771
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,000
Speaker 2: I just want to be able to build on even

772
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 2: if I have one of the sets, Or why do

773
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,760
Speaker 2: I have to build four houses to build a hotel.

774
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:42,880
Speaker 2: I should just be able to build a hotel. And

775
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,000
Speaker 2: I see this in real life too, where we start

776
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:47,439
Speaker 2: saying things like well, I don't like the social media

777
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 2: algorithm because it's not fair, and it's like, it isn't fair,

778
00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:53,759
Speaker 2: but it is the rule, and so if we hate

779
00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:56,719
Speaker 2: the rules, you can't love the game. And I see

780
00:35:56,719 --> 00:35:59,239
Speaker 2: that over and over again, where it's like, well, Jay,

781
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:01,760
Speaker 2: but this isn't or this isn't right, or it should

782
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:04,040
Speaker 2: be like this or new thing, and I'm like, I

783
00:36:04,239 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 2: get it, Like I actually empathize with that, and I

784
00:36:06,800 --> 00:36:10,120
Speaker 2: validate you. I feel the same way. But in order

785
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 2: to love the game, you have to respect the rules.

786
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:14,719
Speaker 2: And so figure out the rules that you figured out

787
00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:17,120
Speaker 2: the rules of vending machines, you figured out the rules

788
00:36:17,120 --> 00:36:20,120
Speaker 2: of different businesses that you've built, and once you know

789
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:23,000
Speaker 2: the rules, you can play the game just like monopoly,

790
00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 2: and I think that's what it takes. So what would

791
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:30,120
Speaker 2: you say, are the rules of some interesting businesses or

792
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:33,200
Speaker 2: even business in general, or money that you think people

793
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:34,360
Speaker 2: need to learn to respect.

794
00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:36,520
Speaker 1: I think the number one rule if you want to

795
00:36:36,560 --> 00:36:39,120
Speaker 1: be successful today is that there's really there's two type

796
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:41,960
Speaker 1: of people. One type of person will be really successful

797
00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:44,439
Speaker 1: and one type of person will never be successful until

798
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:48,759
Speaker 1: they change their mentality. And we call these fixers verse freeloaders.

799
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 1: A fixer is somebody who if you imagine there's a

800
00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:55,399
Speaker 1: leaky boat right and there's all these holes in it,

801
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:59,520
Speaker 1: the fixer will be the one that starts actively thinking, okay,

802
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:02,000
Speaker 1: we've got some you know, putty over here, We're going

803
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:03,680
Speaker 1: to put it on here, We're actually going to start

804
00:37:03,680 --> 00:37:06,040
Speaker 1: bailing things out over there. They realize that there is

805
00:37:06,080 --> 00:37:08,800
Speaker 1: a problem. The problem is annoying. They probably didn't create

806
00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:11,960
Speaker 1: the problem, The problem might actually be somebody else's fault entirely.

807
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:14,439
Speaker 1: And yet what do they do. They immediately go into

808
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:18,440
Speaker 1: fix mode. And then there's the freeloader. And we can

809
00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:21,200
Speaker 1: all have a little component of this, but a freeloader

810
00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:24,120
Speaker 1: is so common today. The freeloader is the one that's

811
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 1: standing in the boat, and they might be saying, well,

812
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:29,279
Speaker 1: you know, I don't mind the holes, or that's what

813
00:37:29,400 --> 00:37:32,440
Speaker 1: somebody else's issue, or I don't have time to fix that,

814
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,239
Speaker 1: or I don't really know what to do about that.

815
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,600
Speaker 1: And if you go through your life with this freeloader mentality,

816
00:37:38,600 --> 00:37:40,759
Speaker 1: if somebody else will fix it all the time, well

817
00:37:40,800 --> 00:37:43,840
Speaker 1: then somebody else will profit all the time. I've really

818
00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:47,920
Speaker 1: had to right, I've had this realization lately that every

819
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:50,560
Speaker 1: time I find a problem in my business, that's where

820
00:37:50,600 --> 00:37:52,920
Speaker 1: the profit is. Every time I have a problem in

821
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:54,560
Speaker 1: my life, that's where the money is.

822
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:55,439
Speaker 2: Oh that's so good.

823
00:37:55,640 --> 00:37:58,359
Speaker 1: And so if I can just start not having that

824
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:01,239
Speaker 1: sinking feeling in my stomach when I find a big,

825
00:38:01,320 --> 00:38:05,080
Speaker 1: hairy problem and instead say oh that means there's money there,

826
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:07,880
Speaker 1: that means there's opportunity there, that means there's growth there,

827
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:11,319
Speaker 1: then my worldview kind of changes. And you know, when

828
00:38:11,320 --> 00:38:12,799
Speaker 1: we came in here, we were just talking and I

829
00:38:12,840 --> 00:38:14,799
Speaker 1: was like, oh God, I'm having a week because I

830
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,760
Speaker 1: you know, I got this one business and we're growing

831
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:20,400
Speaker 1: really fast, and that sounds cool, except that when you

832
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:23,920
Speaker 1: grow really fast, there's all these issues. There's people issues,

833
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:27,160
Speaker 1: and there's business issues, and so I'm in it right now,

834
00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:30,319
Speaker 1: and yet I always try to make myself go back

835
00:38:30,360 --> 00:38:33,680
Speaker 1: and say, it's my fault that we're here, and that

836
00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:36,560
Speaker 1: actually is really liberating because if it's my fault, that

837
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:38,399
Speaker 1: means that I also might be able to fix it.

838
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,360
Speaker 1: If it's somebody else's fault, then what am I going

839
00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:44,520
Speaker 1: to do about it? And so as often as possible,

840
00:38:44,560 --> 00:38:46,200
Speaker 1: be a fixer and not a freeloader. It's where the

841
00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 1: money is.

842
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:49,400
Speaker 2: I really like that, and that's true whether you're a

843
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:52,360
Speaker 2: team player, whether you're an employee, whether you're the owner,

844
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:55,280
Speaker 2: whether you're looking at a new opportunity. It's true for everyone.

845
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 2: That's why I love it so much, because you could

846
00:38:58,160 --> 00:38:59,680
Speaker 2: be on a team and going, well, where is my

847
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:03,600
Speaker 2: seat is greatest pain point? Whereas my manager's greatest pain point?

848
00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:05,759
Speaker 2: And if I can solve that and we're clear on it,

849
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:07,799
Speaker 2: that could be the greatest opportunity for me to grow

850
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 2: my career one.

851
00:39:08,600 --> 00:39:10,719
Speaker 1: Hundred percent, you know, And if you really want to

852
00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 1: grow and earn a lot, I think one of the

853
00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:15,279
Speaker 1: greatest things that you can do is go find a

854
00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:19,640
Speaker 1: leadership team and a leader that you think you want

855
00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:22,879
Speaker 1: to be like and that you like their trajectory. I mean,

856
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:24,520
Speaker 1: I think you should try to get on as many

857
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:27,120
Speaker 1: rocket ships as you can, and you should really stay

858
00:39:27,160 --> 00:39:31,200
Speaker 1: away from like the pta mom bus, you know, in life,

859
00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:33,919
Speaker 1: I think often we want the smooth ride, we want

860
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:36,919
Speaker 1: the certain ride, we want the sliding doors. We want

861
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:40,359
Speaker 1: to be on a little, nice, little minivan. And what

862
00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:44,319
Speaker 1: we realize is that minivans don't go fast, and minivans

863
00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:46,840
Speaker 1: will probably not be the winner of a race, but

864
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 1: winning comes with all the prizes. So I think, wherever

865
00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:51,640
Speaker 1: you can, you should try to get on the rocket ships.

866
00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:54,080
Speaker 1: And then when you get on the rocket ship, you

867
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:58,239
Speaker 1: got to realize rocket ships have turbulence, they're bumpy, they

868
00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:01,600
Speaker 1: go fast, things break. You can't be surprised when you

869
00:40:01,600 --> 00:40:04,040
Speaker 1: want to be an astronaut and there's turbulence on the

870
00:40:04,080 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 1: way up. And so, you know, I think there's two

871
00:40:06,719 --> 00:40:10,359
Speaker 1: things that I didn't do early enough on in my career. Was, gosh,

872
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:12,040
Speaker 1: I really should have tried to get on more rocket

873
00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:16,279
Speaker 1: ships fast, bumpy, messy, big problems. Oh my gosh. But

874
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,240
Speaker 1: we're going to the moon, and I should stay away

875
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:23,080
Speaker 1: from the normal, you know, mom bus life. That's super,

876
00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:26,960
Speaker 1: super smooth, because when I'm young, man, I don't need this.

877
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:28,759
Speaker 1: I need this once I got kids and once I

878
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 1: got a bunch of responsibilities. But in the beginning, I

879
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 1: should be trying to take all the rides I can.

880
00:40:33,160 --> 00:40:35,640
Speaker 1: And so if I was young and hungry, I would

881
00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 1: be trying to find a jay. I would be trying

882
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,920
Speaker 1: to find teams where they are moving and I want

883
00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 1: to learn from them.

884
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's such great advice. And I look back and

885
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:47,320
Speaker 2: I think as well that I had that same spirit then,

886
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:50,399
Speaker 2: and I probably didn't seek out people like that enough.

887
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 2: I got lucky with a couple of examples, and I

888
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:55,359
Speaker 2: remember it could happen anyway. I remember being I used

889
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,320
Speaker 2: to work at a grocery store, and you know, stacking

890
00:40:58,360 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 2: shelves and whatever. But I was always trying to f

891
00:41:00,239 --> 00:41:02,000
Speaker 2: that on a weekend, you can make a time and

892
00:41:02,000 --> 00:41:03,640
Speaker 2: a half. On a holiday, you could make time and

893
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:05,919
Speaker 2: a half. If I worked a few extra hours, you'd

894
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:08,000
Speaker 2: make You know, you're always trying to figure out what

895
00:41:08,040 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 2: the rules are, as I was saying earlier, and I

896
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:14,040
Speaker 2: think your spot on that if you can jump on

897
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:17,520
Speaker 2: a place where your role is not perfectly defined, you

898
00:41:17,560 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 2: get to do lots of stuff you get to take

899
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:22,040
Speaker 2: more on. When I was at Accenture, which is a

900
00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:26,279
Speaker 2: global consulting firm million employees now globally, it used to

901
00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:28,920
Speaker 2: be five hundred thousand when I was there, they actually

902
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:31,920
Speaker 2: had this really great setup where every year they asked

903
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:36,480
Speaker 2: you to learn one professional skill, one personal skill, and

904
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:40,080
Speaker 2: then one skill that you were just fascinated by. And

905
00:41:40,680 --> 00:41:42,759
Speaker 2: it was really interesting because it was always encouraged that

906
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:45,880
Speaker 2: you needed all three. And I loved that about the

907
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,840
Speaker 2: workplace because it was almost like, what's your extra curricula?

908
00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:50,840
Speaker 2: So you did your day job, but what did you

909
00:41:50,880 --> 00:41:53,640
Speaker 2: do in the evenings? So my evening job at my

910
00:41:53,760 --> 00:41:57,440
Speaker 2: company was teaching meditation. So I was bringing my passion

911
00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 2: into work. What did it do? Hit onlp me network more,

912
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:03,480
Speaker 2: help me connect with people deeper, help me learn about

913
00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:05,239
Speaker 2: different parts of the company that I would never have

914
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:08,440
Speaker 2: got to see if I wasn't teaching meditation. I had

915
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:11,319
Speaker 2: a friend who was a photographer outside of work. We

916
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:14,800
Speaker 2: were consultants by day, but he brought photography into work.

917
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:18,040
Speaker 2: He would photograph all the major events. He'd take headshots

918
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:21,080
Speaker 2: of our CEO, he'd take headshots of our CMO. All

919
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 2: of a sudden he's networking inside the company in a

920
00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 2: way that you never would before. And so it's so

921
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 2: interesting when you take on new responsibilities which are based

922
00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:33,000
Speaker 2: on your passions, even in the workplace, because you never

923
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:33,719
Speaker 2: know where they can go.

924
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:38,000
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and there's something really contagious about somebody who

925
00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:40,799
Speaker 1: is hyper passionate with the things that they do for

926
00:42:40,840 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 1: a living. I mean, so many studies that show that

927
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:44,239
Speaker 1: humans are contagious.

928
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:44,400
Speaker 2: You know.

929
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:46,880
Speaker 1: I was reading something the other day that said, if

930
00:42:46,920 --> 00:42:49,120
Speaker 1: you want to make more money, the fastest way you

931
00:42:49,160 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 1: can do it is actually just by who you surround

932
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:54,240
Speaker 1: yourself with. And so there is actually a correlation between

933
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:56,799
Speaker 1: if you have more friends who make over one hundred

934
00:42:56,840 --> 00:43:00,480
Speaker 1: thousand dollars, you have a ten percent increased like of

935
00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 1: making more money, and somewhere between a two point nine

936
00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:05,839
Speaker 1: I believe in a five percent higher likelihood of investing more.

937
00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:08,600
Speaker 1: This is just like Jay stays the same, Cody stays

938
00:43:08,640 --> 00:43:10,200
Speaker 1: the same, but I hang out with a few people

939
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,520
Speaker 1: who have more cash, I start making more money and

940
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:14,960
Speaker 1: investing more. That's wild, but if you think about it

941
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,280
Speaker 1: makes all the sense in the world. Imagine you wanted

942
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,920
Speaker 1: to lose weight, and so what did you do you

943
00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:21,600
Speaker 1: went and hung out with a bunch of people who

944
00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:23,799
Speaker 1: partied all the time, who ate late night food, who

945
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:26,600
Speaker 1: were drinking constantly, who slept in late, who are more

946
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:29,839
Speaker 1: lethargic because of it, Or you went and hung out

947
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,640
Speaker 1: with crossfitters that don't drink, that work out every day,

948
00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:35,280
Speaker 1: that already have six pack apps. Jay is the same person,

949
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,080
Speaker 1: Cody's the same person. I choose the group that parties,

950
00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:40,680
Speaker 1: you choose the group that crossfits. Who do you think wins?

951
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 1: It's the people that you surround yourself with. And so gosh,

952
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 1: people are contagious in every sense of the word. If

953
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:49,040
Speaker 1: you hang out with people that are passionate and obsessed

954
00:43:49,320 --> 00:43:51,600
Speaker 1: and moving forward, it's just going to be easier for

955
00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:52,640
Speaker 1: you to do the same thing.

956
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,239
Speaker 2: Oh it's so good, it's so true, And I just

957
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:58,640
Speaker 2: you know how simple it is when you start doing it.

958
00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:00,759
Speaker 2: But I feel like we're all so scared of like

959
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:04,000
Speaker 2: letting our friends down. We think we're you know, sometimes

960
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:07,359
Speaker 2: we also get the backlash, like our friends might be like, oh, yeah,

961
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:09,360
Speaker 2: you just want to be around that person now, you

962
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:11,960
Speaker 2: just want to be successful. Now we're not good enough

963
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:13,759
Speaker 2: for you. And I think all of these things of

964
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:16,080
Speaker 2: what play on people's minds is we don't want to

965
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 2: be bad people, but this isn't being a bad person,

966
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:20,400
Speaker 2: but we kind of carry that around.

967
00:44:20,560 --> 00:44:23,320
Speaker 1: It's very true. I mean like there's like a micro lesson.

968
00:44:23,400 --> 00:44:25,680
Speaker 1: So let's say right now, you're trying to save more money.

969
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:27,600
Speaker 1: A lot of the ways when when you're young and

970
00:44:27,640 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 1: don't have a lot of money that you spend it

971
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 1: is entertainment, right, It's going out with your friends. And

972
00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:34,480
Speaker 1: a lot of times when you go out with your friends,

973
00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:36,560
Speaker 1: what do you do? Like you guys are eating and

974
00:44:36,640 --> 00:44:39,040
Speaker 1: drinking and who's splitting the check and what's happening here.

975
00:44:39,280 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 1: I think that's a really uncomfortable thing for young people

976
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:42,960
Speaker 1: to do. They're like, I don't know how to have

977
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:46,000
Speaker 1: a conversation with somebody saying I'm really limited my spend

978
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 1: so I know there's six of us and it would

979
00:44:48,560 --> 00:44:51,160
Speaker 1: be really awkward. But I'm not drinking tonight and I'm

980
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:52,680
Speaker 1: just going to have this little thing, So do you

981
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:55,359
Speaker 1: mind if I pay for my portion of it? Why

982
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:57,839
Speaker 1: do we worry about doing something like that because people

983
00:44:57,840 --> 00:44:59,879
Speaker 1: are going to think we're cheap, They might judge us.

984
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 1: They're gonna think that, you know, we're not all in

985
00:45:01,880 --> 00:45:04,399
Speaker 1: it together. And yet how are you going to reach

986
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 1: your goals if you're not willing to do even that

987
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,680
Speaker 1: little thing? And I remember back in the day, you know,

988
00:45:08,719 --> 00:45:10,680
Speaker 1: when I had no money at all and I couldn't

989
00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:14,280
Speaker 1: afford anything. That felt super embarrassing to me. And yet

990
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:17,920
Speaker 1: those micro decisions will help you macro if you do it.

991
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:20,440
Speaker 1: And all it is is expectation setting. I think a

992
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:22,440
Speaker 1: lot of times, if you want people to go along

993
00:45:22,440 --> 00:45:24,640
Speaker 1: with something, you just say, Hey, I'm super embarrassed to

994
00:45:24,640 --> 00:45:27,960
Speaker 1: bring this up, and it's a little it feels weird

995
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 1: to me, But I'm really trying to save up to

996
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:32,680
Speaker 1: invest and to do this other thing, and I want

997
00:45:32,680 --> 00:45:34,719
Speaker 1: to hang out with you guys tonight. Would it make

998
00:45:34,760 --> 00:45:37,440
Speaker 1: you so uncomfortable if I asked to just pay for

999
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:40,480
Speaker 1: my portion because I can't keep going out and doing

1000
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:42,320
Speaker 1: all this if I have to spend everything. You know

1001
00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:44,839
Speaker 1: what you're gonna do, You're gonna unlock for somebody else

1002
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,120
Speaker 1: there who's too afraid to say it and never will

1003
00:45:47,280 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 1: that they feel the exact same way. They're actually like,

1004
00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:51,920
Speaker 1: oh god, they got me too, because Happy Hour slowly

1005
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:53,760
Speaker 1: killing my entire investing budget.

1006
00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:55,719
Speaker 2: This is coming up more and more in every conversation

1007
00:45:55,760 --> 00:45:58,719
Speaker 2: I have right now, if you actually said what you

1008
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 2: were worried about, people would actually get it. It's when

1009
00:46:01,960 --> 00:46:04,360
Speaker 2: you kind of try and do the awkward thing of

1010
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:06,680
Speaker 2: not sharing how you feel about it. Like when you

1011
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:09,160
Speaker 2: say I'm embarrassed about this, All of a sudden, that

1012
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:13,880
Speaker 2: person has empathy. Right. Your confession of embarrassment creates empathy

1013
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:17,280
Speaker 2: and compassion in the other person, and then they receive

1014
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:20,080
Speaker 2: it with the understanding. Whereas if you just say, hey,

1015
00:46:20,080 --> 00:46:22,400
Speaker 2: I don't think I'm coming out tonight now, it's like

1016
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:25,600
Speaker 2: what's wrong If you now go out and say, oh, yeah,

1017
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:27,120
Speaker 2: I'm just going to pay for my thing now, you

1018
00:46:27,120 --> 00:46:29,759
Speaker 2: could come across as cheap or all the other things

1019
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:32,400
Speaker 2: you're worried about. As soon as you're honest about the embarrassment,

1020
00:46:32,440 --> 00:46:36,680
Speaker 2: the vulnerability insight such a beautiful connection with someone. And

1021
00:46:36,680 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 2: by the way, next time, they may not choose that spot.

1022
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:41,279
Speaker 2: They might choose someone that's easier for you. If they're

1023
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:44,720
Speaker 2: a good friend, they're actually they're actually walking your direction,

1024
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:45,600
Speaker 2: if that makes sense.

1025
00:46:45,719 --> 00:46:48,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, you give somebody else a chance to actually be

1026
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:50,760
Speaker 1: there for you, which I've realized is a real gift.

1027
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:52,799
Speaker 1: I'm not so good at that. But you know, if

1028
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:55,640
Speaker 1: you can allow another person sort of in man, Wall's

1029
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:58,480
Speaker 1: breakdown pretty quick. And then as you make more money,

1030
00:46:58,680 --> 00:47:01,359
Speaker 1: you can start paying for the other way. Yeah, you know,

1031
00:47:01,440 --> 00:47:03,240
Speaker 1: and then when you can. That's one of the coolest

1032
00:47:03,239 --> 00:47:05,040
Speaker 1: parts about having money is then you're like, I got

1033
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:06,880
Speaker 1: all this, like, don't worry about it, not want of you,

1034
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:08,399
Speaker 1: and you don't have to do it all the time.

1035
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 1: You don't have to, you know, big shot people. But

1036
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,520
Speaker 1: when you're in your growth phase, when you're in your

1037
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:16,399
Speaker 1: save phase, just be there. That's okay, that's where you are,

1038
00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:18,400
Speaker 1: and know that you don't have to stay there. You

1039
00:47:18,440 --> 00:47:21,600
Speaker 1: can eventually be in your big boy giveaway, buy the bottles,

1040
00:47:21,640 --> 00:47:23,799
Speaker 1: do whatever you want phase, but you don't have to

1041
00:47:23,840 --> 00:47:27,000
Speaker 1: pretend like you're not there. And man, that'll really help

1042
00:47:27,080 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 1: too in environments like this where it feels harder to

1043
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:33,279
Speaker 1: make money and you feel a little heavy, and you know,

1044
00:47:33,400 --> 00:47:35,400
Speaker 1: I saw this in business too. I saw this tweet

1045
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:36,680
Speaker 1: the other day that I was like, ooof.

1046
00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:37,960
Speaker 2: It was a.

1047
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:40,480
Speaker 1: Business owner and the tweet was literally a picture of

1048
00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:42,560
Speaker 1: a really expensive looking dinner and it was like, when

1049
00:47:42,600 --> 00:47:45,759
Speaker 1: your company's a couple of weeks out from having no cash.

1050
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:48,279
Speaker 1: But you know that team morale is really expensive, so

1051
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:50,239
Speaker 1: you spend a couple thousand dollars on a dinner for

1052
00:47:50,239 --> 00:47:52,640
Speaker 1: the team. And I looked at that for a second,

1053
00:47:52,640 --> 00:47:55,520
Speaker 1: and I don't believe in like posting any criticism on

1054
00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:57,520
Speaker 1: the internet, so I would never say anything for that

1055
00:47:57,560 --> 00:48:01,600
Speaker 1: person directly, but I think he's wrong. I think instead

1056
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:04,560
Speaker 1: what you really should do as a leader just say, hey,

1057
00:48:04,920 --> 00:48:06,680
Speaker 1: we're in a period where we need to tighten up

1058
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 1: a little bit, and I'd love us to maybe take

1059
00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:12,080
Speaker 1: an afternoon off, or maybe do something that doesn't cost

1060
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:14,759
Speaker 1: the company money, or maybe we could come up with

1061
00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:16,799
Speaker 1: some cool ideas. We could do a little challenge to

1062
00:48:16,840 --> 00:48:18,600
Speaker 1: see who could come up with the best idea for

1063
00:48:18,680 --> 00:48:21,600
Speaker 1: us to do some team building. But I can't actually

1064
00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:24,640
Speaker 1: afford this couple thousand because it's my duty to protect

1065
00:48:24,840 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 1: your job and to protect your future in this company.

1066
00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:30,560
Speaker 1: And so even though it would make me look good

1067
00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:33,319
Speaker 1: to spend a bunch of money, I'm not going to.

1068
00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:37,200
Speaker 1: And it's scary being in an ownership position when a

1069
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 1: business isn't working, it's super super scary, And so it's

1070
00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:43,960
Speaker 1: okay to also, they don't have to tell everybody everything

1071
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:46,520
Speaker 1: all the time. It's not their job to handle your

1072
00:48:46,600 --> 00:48:50,400
Speaker 1: business stress, but it is okay to tell them some reality.

1073
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:53,759
Speaker 2: Cody, there's two big Arizona quiz you on now. I

1074
00:48:54,120 --> 00:48:55,880
Speaker 2: think there's going to be a lot of great stuff.

1075
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:57,520
Speaker 2: I'm going to let you choose which one we start with.

1076
00:48:57,640 --> 00:49:02,200
Speaker 2: One is money and dating and relationships, and the other

1077
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:05,640
Speaker 2: is the basics of investing. When someone is starting with little,

1078
00:49:05,800 --> 00:49:06,800
Speaker 2: where do you want to go first?

1079
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:09,120
Speaker 1: I want to start with something really random, which is

1080
00:49:09,320 --> 00:49:11,400
Speaker 1: so there was an interesting study I saw the other

1081
00:49:11,520 --> 00:49:15,120
Speaker 1: day that shows how you can predict if a recession

1082
00:49:15,160 --> 00:49:18,000
Speaker 1: is coming through the way that women buy beauty products.

1083
00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:20,600
Speaker 1: And so it's called the lipstick theory. And I was

1084
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:22,680
Speaker 1: playing around with this today because I think all of

1085
00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 1: us are wondering where the economy's going. And basically what

1086
00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:28,879
Speaker 1: happened is during the this is when the world trade

1087
00:49:28,920 --> 00:49:33,320
Speaker 1: centers came down. So Estey Lauds, the founder of the company,

1088
00:49:33,680 --> 00:49:37,960
Speaker 1: basically realized that even though the market had a lot

1089
00:49:37,960 --> 00:49:40,520
Speaker 1: of fluctuations in it, it was down hugely from the

1090
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:44,240
Speaker 1: world trade centers crashing. Lipstick sales were up eleven percent,

1091
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:47,960
Speaker 1: and actually a bunch of these like non necessary cosmetics

1092
00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:50,359
Speaker 1: were up a ton, and so we started looking at why,

1093
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:54,759
Speaker 1: and what they realized is when the market really crashes,

1094
00:49:55,000 --> 00:49:56,920
Speaker 1: you would think people would pull back on things they

1095
00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:59,120
Speaker 1: don't need, but what they actually do is they pull

1096
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:01,560
Speaker 1: back on the big luck and they spend more on

1097
00:50:01,600 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 1: the tiny ones. So it might not be that they

1098
00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:07,160
Speaker 1: go on vacation that year, but it might be that

1099
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:09,439
Speaker 1: they look a little prettier in the mirror every single day.

1100
00:50:09,760 --> 00:50:11,719
Speaker 1: And so I thought that was interesting because as we're

1101
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:13,719
Speaker 1: thinking about recession, what are some of the indicators that

1102
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:16,480
Speaker 1: nobody's watching today that could tell us what's happening. And

1103
00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:18,399
Speaker 1: so one of them is actually, look at a spike

1104
00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:20,759
Speaker 1: and beauty products. You can also see that by a

1105
00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:22,880
Speaker 1: spike of the people who are launching them are a

1106
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:24,880
Speaker 1: lot of people continuing to buy, which I thought was

1107
00:50:24,960 --> 00:50:28,480
Speaker 1: kind of interesting, which is which is happening right now? Yeah,

1108
00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:31,200
Speaker 1: and then you know, the place I think that this

1109
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:32,840
Speaker 1: takes us is maybe a little bit more on the

1110
00:50:32,920 --> 00:50:36,160
Speaker 1: dating side, which is here's some a little tough truth.

1111
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:38,880
Speaker 1: It turns out, if you want to make more money,

1112
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:41,279
Speaker 1: one of the best things that you can do is

1113
00:50:41,360 --> 00:50:45,839
Speaker 1: find a partner, which is crazy. So married couples make

1114
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:50,240
Speaker 1: on average more than thirty percent more than non married couples.

1115
00:50:50,480 --> 00:50:54,120
Speaker 1: Their net worth is almost three x someone who is

1116
00:50:54,200 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 1: single over the course of their entire career. And so

1117
00:50:58,280 --> 00:51:00,560
Speaker 1: I bring this up not to shame anybody who hasn't

1118
00:51:00,560 --> 00:51:02,520
Speaker 1: found their partner. I know what that's like when you

1119
00:51:02,920 --> 00:51:06,000
Speaker 1: feel like there's no options and you want to find

1120
00:51:06,040 --> 00:51:08,000
Speaker 1: love but it's not around you. But why I do

1121
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:09,880
Speaker 1: bring it up is because I think it's something that

1122
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:12,480
Speaker 1: we should really prioritize. We should prioritize if we care

1123
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:14,960
Speaker 1: about making money, and we should prioritize if we care

1124
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,439
Speaker 1: about love, certainly, and I think it's gotten a bad rap.

1125
00:51:17,480 --> 00:51:19,359
Speaker 1: Marriage has a bad rap. You do an incredible job

1126
00:51:19,400 --> 00:51:21,680
Speaker 1: of showing the beauty that can be behind it. Will

1127
00:51:21,719 --> 00:51:23,880
Speaker 1: also being like sometimes I hate her, Like I with

1128
00:51:23,880 --> 00:51:26,560
Speaker 1: my husband side was like, oh you today. Really they

1129
00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:28,120
Speaker 1: got to love you because I want to murder you.

1130
00:51:28,640 --> 00:51:32,560
Speaker 1: It's a real boon to your financial health. And so

1131
00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:35,439
Speaker 1: anybody that is around you that is saying I don't

1132
00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:38,560
Speaker 1: need no man, I'd be better off without him. You know,

1133
00:51:38,680 --> 00:51:42,280
Speaker 1: they're all toxic. Everybody else is a narcissist that I've dated.

1134
00:51:42,840 --> 00:51:44,360
Speaker 1: I kind of want to push on your frame a

1135
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 1: little bit and say, one, do you think you attract

1136
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:51,400
Speaker 1: things that you hate on? Probably not. Two. There's a

1137
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,799
Speaker 1: lot of reasons why you showing the stability for a

1138
00:51:53,840 --> 00:51:56,840
Speaker 1: partnership will lead to a more stable life overall. And

1139
00:51:56,880 --> 00:51:58,719
Speaker 1: so I thought that was that was fascinating.

1140
00:51:59,320 --> 00:52:02,239
Speaker 2: Before we die into the next moment, let's hear from

1141
00:52:02,239 --> 00:52:06,200
Speaker 2: our sponsors, thanks for taking a moment for that. Now

1142
00:52:06,239 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 2: back to the discussion. When I look at successful men,

1143
00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:12,560
Speaker 2: going back to your earlier point of mentors, any of

1144
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:15,879
Speaker 2: the successful men that I've ever been mentored by talk

1145
00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 2: to me about having a one woman life change their

1146
00:52:19,480 --> 00:52:22,440
Speaker 2: career trajectory because they found that the less time they

1147
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:27,000
Speaker 2: wasted on chasing, pursuing, wooing women, the more time they

1148
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:29,640
Speaker 2: had to focus on their career. So, even from the

1149
00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:33,120
Speaker 2: other side, men who decide to commit to one woman

1150
00:52:33,640 --> 00:52:37,480
Speaker 2: have more energy, more focus, more drive, more power to

1151
00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:40,279
Speaker 2: direct towards making money and building a business than they

1152
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:43,360
Speaker 2: do when they're trying to impress lots of women or

1153
00:52:43,440 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 2: take care of lots of women. Now, of course, there

1154
00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:47,759
Speaker 2: are exceptions. There are people who have become very successful

1155
00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:50,799
Speaker 2: without having a partner, and whatever they may have even

1156
00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:53,920
Speaker 2: put their love life on the back burner. Sure, but

1157
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:56,840
Speaker 2: men who were married were just more who had that

1158
00:52:56,920 --> 00:52:57,880
Speaker 2: commitment in their.

1159
00:52:57,760 --> 00:52:59,759
Speaker 1: Life, which is wild. They say, you're happier too, and

1160
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 1: you live longer. Yeah, we're like slightly less happy as well.

1161
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:07,360
Speaker 2: Right, you're dealing with a baby exact. It's funny. Yesterday

1162
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,279
Speaker 2: my wife said to me because I must have said

1163
00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 2: to her what I want for dinner, and she goes, well,

1164
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:13,279
Speaker 2: this is great training to have a kid. And I

1165
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 2: said to yeah. She goes, husband's a great training to

1166
00:53:15,560 --> 00:53:17,000
Speaker 2: have a kid, and I go, yeah, wife's a great

1167
00:53:17,080 --> 00:53:21,160
Speaker 2: training to have a teenager. It's just like, it was

1168
00:53:21,200 --> 00:53:23,360
Speaker 2: just this really funny moment when we were bantering and

1169
00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:25,600
Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, you're like a teenager, like dealing

1170
00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:28,080
Speaker 2: with emotions and all this stuff, and you're dealing with

1171
00:53:28,120 --> 00:53:30,319
Speaker 2: my like baby needs of like hey, can you feed me?

1172
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:35,520
Speaker 1: It's very, very true. I also think, man, if you're like,

1173
00:53:35,719 --> 00:53:38,280
Speaker 1: I talk more from the women perspective, just because I'm

1174
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,480
Speaker 1: a chick and so I try to talk about all

1175
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:43,799
Speaker 1: the things I know about, but you know, from a

1176
00:53:43,840 --> 00:53:46,719
Speaker 1: female perspective, there's a lot of things that I think

1177
00:53:46,719 --> 00:53:48,520
Speaker 1: are wrong in the way we date with money.

1178
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:50,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I want to get into. Yeah.

1179
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:54,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like, for instance, you know, increasingly they say that

1180
00:53:54,120 --> 00:53:56,640
Speaker 1: sixty four percent of women will not date a man

1181
00:53:56,920 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 1: if he doesn't have the same income level or higher

1182
00:54:00,120 --> 00:54:03,799
Speaker 1: her for men, that actually, in the studies at least,

1183
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:06,239
Speaker 1: does not seem to be the case. They actually don't

1184
00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:09,880
Speaker 1: care about income level. Well, problem there that more women

1185
00:54:10,040 --> 00:54:13,560
Speaker 1: are increasing their incomes and increasing their education levels than

1186
00:54:13,680 --> 00:54:16,879
Speaker 1: men are today. I think there's something darker even than

1187
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:20,239
Speaker 1: the six or five trust fund blue eyes thing, which

1188
00:54:20,280 --> 00:54:23,600
Speaker 1: is we're prioritizing the thing that seems to not lead

1189
00:54:23,640 --> 00:54:27,000
Speaker 1: to any increase in happiness. Couples are no happier if

1190
00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:28,880
Speaker 1: they are the same income level or higher or not.

1191
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:33,319
Speaker 1: They aren't wealthier if they focus on that than something else.

1192
00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:35,799
Speaker 1: And so from my perspective, I'm like, man, if you're

1193
00:54:35,840 --> 00:54:38,520
Speaker 1: a woman today, you know that don't give dating advice.

1194
00:54:38,600 --> 00:54:40,840
Speaker 1: But the money seems to show that that does not

1195
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:43,520
Speaker 1: matter in a relationship. You know, my husband is amazing,

1196
00:54:44,080 --> 00:54:46,359
Speaker 1: and I was already ran a business when I met him.

1197
00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:49,120
Speaker 1: He was an avcal. The government doesn't pay very much

1198
00:54:49,160 --> 00:54:52,000
Speaker 1: for that role, and so he was just playing a

1199
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:55,600
Speaker 1: totally different game. He didn't care about money actually at all.

1200
00:54:55,840 --> 00:54:58,279
Speaker 1: He cared about service and he cared about respect. That's

1201
00:54:58,320 --> 00:55:00,640
Speaker 1: what he wanted. He wanted to do something served, and

1202
00:55:00,680 --> 00:55:04,160
Speaker 1: he wanted to do something that commanded respect. I in finance,

1203
00:55:04,280 --> 00:55:06,080
Speaker 1: was not that much serving, you know, but I was

1204
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:07,759
Speaker 1: a lot money, and so when the two of us

1205
00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:09,880
Speaker 1: came together, it was really really powerful. And so for

1206
00:55:10,280 --> 00:55:11,800
Speaker 1: women today, a lot of times when they asked me,

1207
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:13,520
Speaker 1: how do you know? How do you find a partner?

1208
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:14,680
Speaker 1: What do you do if you make a lot of

1209
00:55:14,680 --> 00:55:16,920
Speaker 1: money and he doesn't like, find somebody who plays a

1210
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 1: different game, because then you two can compliment. Did you

1211
00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:21,520
Speaker 1: both play the same game? Were you both trying to

1212
00:55:21,560 --> 00:55:22,760
Speaker 1: grow and make money?

1213
00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:25,760
Speaker 2: No? No, no, So well, Radi's always been at peace.

1214
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:28,440
Speaker 2: She's always been at peace with who she is, what

1215
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:32,360
Speaker 2: she has, and her journey was more kind of I

1216
00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:34,640
Speaker 2: always talk about the aspect of what you mentioned of

1217
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:37,480
Speaker 2: being surrounded by more people. So we grew up in

1218
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:42,680
Speaker 2: a culture where generally women in our community became housewives

1219
00:55:42,680 --> 00:55:45,279
Speaker 2: and took care of the kids. That's majority of what

1220
00:55:45,320 --> 00:55:48,720
Speaker 2: you'd see growing up where I grew up. Now, that's beautiful,

1221
00:55:48,760 --> 00:55:50,600
Speaker 2: there's nothing wrong with that, And I'm not judging it.

1222
00:55:50,960 --> 00:55:53,680
Speaker 2: What was interesting was when we moved to New York

1223
00:55:53,760 --> 00:55:56,080
Speaker 2: and then we moved to La RADI was surrounded by

1224
00:55:56,080 --> 00:55:58,560
Speaker 2: a lot of our female friends who were all founders,

1225
00:55:58,680 --> 00:56:01,920
Speaker 2: who built businesses, who've achieved a lot of incredible things,

1226
00:56:01,960 --> 00:56:04,960
Speaker 2: and they happen to be happy moms and happy wives

1227
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:07,920
Speaker 2: as well. Rather being exposed to them almost opened up

1228
00:56:07,960 --> 00:56:11,400
Speaker 2: to this idea of what women could do, what women

1229
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:14,200
Speaker 2: could achieve, what was possible. And she has just come

1230
00:56:14,239 --> 00:56:17,200
Speaker 2: into her own when she launched her book last year

1231
00:56:17,239 --> 00:56:20,279
Speaker 2: for the first time, when she launched her podcast last year,

1232
00:56:20,320 --> 00:56:22,759
Speaker 2: when she's just been growing and finding herself, and I

1233
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:26,160
Speaker 2: think she's really loved the journey. It's never been about growth,

1234
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:29,400
Speaker 2: it's never been about conquering, it's never been about a destination.

1235
00:56:29,960 --> 00:56:32,640
Speaker 2: She just loves the fact she can fully express herself

1236
00:56:33,000 --> 00:56:36,040
Speaker 2: and use her skills to help people. I started with

1237
00:56:36,080 --> 00:56:39,240
Speaker 2: the same thing. I never had financial goals. I never

1238
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:43,880
Speaker 2: knew anyone who is that financially successful. I just wanted

1239
00:56:43,880 --> 00:56:45,880
Speaker 2: to find a way to help people. And then I

1240
00:56:45,960 --> 00:56:49,480
Speaker 2: realized you couldn't help people full time if you couldn't

1241
00:56:49,480 --> 00:56:51,840
Speaker 2: do this full time, so you can have all the

1242
00:56:51,880 --> 00:56:54,799
Speaker 2: most noble reasons to do what you do. If you

1243
00:56:54,840 --> 00:56:58,200
Speaker 2: can't pay yourself and pay people to help you do it,

1244
00:56:58,560 --> 00:57:00,239
Speaker 2: you're not going to do it for that long. So

1245
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 2: I had to rewire my relationship with money because I

1246
00:57:04,120 --> 00:57:05,560
Speaker 2: used to believe that if you were doing good in

1247
00:57:05,560 --> 00:57:08,200
Speaker 2: the world, you had to be poorow And I had

1248
00:57:08,200 --> 00:57:11,440
Speaker 2: to completely shift my relationship because I had to understand

1249
00:57:11,480 --> 00:57:13,279
Speaker 2: that actually, if I wanted to do bigger good in

1250
00:57:13,320 --> 00:57:16,400
Speaker 2: the world, I needed money because I needed bigger teams,

1251
00:57:16,600 --> 00:57:20,520
Speaker 2: I needed bigger opportunities, I needed bigger relationships and the

1252
00:57:20,600 --> 00:57:23,560
Speaker 2: rules of the game. Money gives access to that.

1253
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:26,440
Speaker 1: I come from a Latino culture, and so money was

1254
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:29,080
Speaker 1: never really bad. It was bad to talk about it.

1255
00:57:29,120 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 1: You couldn't really talk about money, and it was bad

1256
00:57:31,360 --> 00:57:33,760
Speaker 1: to maybe have too too much of it. That was like, oh,

1257
00:57:33,800 --> 00:57:35,840
Speaker 1: they're really rich, so how did they get there?

1258
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:37,600
Speaker 2: Same? You know, I'm very similar.

1259
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:41,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, but my dad, which I'm so grateful and if

1260
00:57:41,880 --> 00:57:43,520
Speaker 1: I have kids, I hope I can do the same thing.

1261
00:57:44,040 --> 00:57:45,360
Speaker 1: You know, if you want to be a good father

1262
00:57:45,440 --> 00:57:47,000
Speaker 1: to a daughter and you want your daughter to be

1263
00:57:47,080 --> 00:57:50,800
Speaker 1: really confident and have a ton of optionality, I'd model

1264
00:57:50,840 --> 00:57:53,040
Speaker 1: after my father and what he always said as well,

1265
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:55,280
Speaker 1: you could be a princess, or you could also be

1266
00:57:55,320 --> 00:57:59,840
Speaker 1: the president. You know, you choose, and then he's very cute.

1267
00:58:00,120 --> 00:58:02,920
Speaker 1: And he also really taught me that money is a

1268
00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:06,120
Speaker 1: moral It doesn't care. It is a tool. A hammer

1269
00:58:06,520 --> 00:58:08,920
Speaker 1: is not good or bad except how you use it.

1270
00:58:08,960 --> 00:58:10,720
Speaker 1: You could use a hammer for really good to build something.

1271
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:12,720
Speaker 1: You could use a hammer for murder. Same with money,

1272
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:15,000
Speaker 1: And so I had to. I came to the terms

1273
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:17,160
Speaker 1: with money in this way because I think that money

1274
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:20,320
Speaker 1: is an accelerator to whatever is inside of you. So

1275
00:58:20,360 --> 00:58:22,439
Speaker 1: if you are not a great person and you want

1276
00:58:22,440 --> 00:58:24,520
Speaker 1: to do bad things in the world, money is really

1277
00:58:24,560 --> 00:58:26,280
Speaker 1: bad to be in your hands. If you are a

1278
00:58:26,280 --> 00:58:28,040
Speaker 1: good person and you want to do good in the world,

1279
00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:30,680
Speaker 1: money is really good to have in your hands. And

1280
00:58:30,800 --> 00:58:32,280
Speaker 1: as long as you can stay true to that thing

1281
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:35,000
Speaker 1: inside of you, then money is actually just an ability

1282
00:58:35,040 --> 00:58:36,400
Speaker 1: for you to build the world that you want as

1283
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:38,000
Speaker 1: supposed to live in somebody else's.

1284
00:58:38,160 --> 00:58:38,320
Speaker 2: You know.

1285
00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:40,439
Speaker 1: I watched my brother kind of go through this because

1286
00:58:40,480 --> 00:58:43,600
Speaker 1: he's never cared really about money or success. I mean,

1287
00:58:43,680 --> 00:58:47,240
Speaker 1: he got married last weekend and at you, wow, no, thanks,

1288
00:58:47,320 --> 00:58:50,240
Speaker 1: I'm really excited for him. She's amazing too, and he

1289
00:58:50,320 --> 00:58:52,400
Speaker 1: said at his speech, He's like, before I'm at Athena,

1290
00:58:52,800 --> 00:58:55,680
Speaker 1: I used to think that I wanted to just kind

1291
00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:57,920
Speaker 1: of post up on a beach somewhere, drink beers, like

1292
00:58:57,960 --> 00:58:59,720
Speaker 1: I didn't really want to build very much out of life.

1293
00:58:59,720 --> 00:59:01,760
Speaker 1: I want to just chill. And I'd never heard him

1294
00:59:01,760 --> 00:59:03,920
Speaker 1: say that out loud before. He said, but then I'm

1295
00:59:03,920 --> 00:59:06,480
Speaker 1: at Athena, and now that's not enough. Now I want

1296
00:59:06,520 --> 00:59:08,160
Speaker 1: to build something. I want to build for her, I

1297
00:59:08,200 --> 00:59:10,280
Speaker 1: want to build for our kids. And I just watched

1298
00:59:10,360 --> 00:59:12,280
Speaker 1: him like turn into a little man, you know, in

1299
00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:15,760
Speaker 1: front of me, which was incredible, and then also realize

1300
00:59:16,120 --> 00:59:18,720
Speaker 1: you're made for more. But he is. He sounds to

1301
00:59:18,760 --> 00:59:20,520
Speaker 1: me like what Roddy sounds like to you, which is

1302
00:59:20,640 --> 00:59:23,400
Speaker 1: he has always been very comfortable as him. He is

1303
00:59:23,480 --> 00:59:26,520
Speaker 1: the most him human I've ever met. You couldn't really

1304
00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:30,040
Speaker 1: peer pressure him into anything. And I have a lot

1305
00:59:30,080 --> 00:59:32,000
Speaker 1: of respect for people that have that kind of piece.

1306
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:34,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really special. I want. I want to go

1307
00:59:34,800 --> 00:59:36,360
Speaker 2: back into this, and I know I'm not asking for

1308
00:59:36,440 --> 00:59:39,160
Speaker 2: dating advice, asking for money advice good, which I think

1309
00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:42,200
Speaker 2: they go so closely together now. And I love where

1310
00:59:42,200 --> 00:59:43,960
Speaker 2: we started off. But there's so many things to kind

1311
00:59:43,960 --> 00:59:46,520
Speaker 2: of unpack with that. Who should pay on the first date?

1312
00:59:46,760 --> 00:59:47,360
Speaker 2: Men or women?

1313
00:59:47,680 --> 00:59:51,240
Speaker 1: In my opinion, I think the person who asks for

1314
00:59:51,320 --> 00:59:55,600
Speaker 1: the date it pays. I agree, yep. Men versus women. Women,

1315
00:59:55,640 --> 00:59:57,080
Speaker 1: if you're going to ask them out on a date,

1316
00:59:57,120 --> 01:00:00,360
Speaker 1: I think the expectation is at least offer. If you're

1317
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:01,600
Speaker 1: going to ask somebody out on the date, I think

1318
01:00:01,640 --> 01:00:04,560
Speaker 1: the expectation is do it. I tend to be a

1319
01:00:04,560 --> 01:00:07,680
Speaker 1: traditionalist in some ways. I think sort of a high

1320
01:00:07,760 --> 01:00:11,520
Speaker 1: value man wants to support and protect his woman, doesn't

1321
01:00:11,520 --> 01:00:14,040
Speaker 1: always have to be financially, but in some way, shape

1322
01:00:14,120 --> 01:00:16,920
Speaker 1: or form, and a high value woman wants to do

1323
01:00:16,960 --> 01:00:19,440
Speaker 1: the same thing for her man, but probably can't protect

1324
01:00:19,520 --> 01:00:23,360
Speaker 1: him as much. That's just our physiology, right, And so

1325
01:00:23,440 --> 01:00:25,400
Speaker 1: that would be my gut reaction now if it's up

1326
01:00:25,440 --> 01:00:27,680
Speaker 1: to me. I remember back in the day, I did

1327
01:00:27,680 --> 01:00:30,640
Speaker 1: get asked on a date once and they didn't pay,

1328
01:00:30,840 --> 01:00:33,160
Speaker 1: and it was such a huge turn off for me.

1329
01:00:33,800 --> 01:00:36,840
Speaker 1: We've stayed friends, but I was like, immediate unsubscribed, we're

1330
01:00:36,840 --> 01:00:40,120
Speaker 1: never dating. And so it's tough to be a man

1331
01:00:40,320 --> 01:00:42,680
Speaker 1: in that case in some way today, But if you

1332
01:00:42,720 --> 01:00:44,880
Speaker 1: were going to date somebody like me, I would expect

1333
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:48,760
Speaker 1: you to at least offer if you ask, what do

1334
01:00:48,800 --> 01:00:49,160
Speaker 1: you think?

1335
01:00:49,280 --> 01:00:51,360
Speaker 2: I think? So I agree with you the person who asks,

1336
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,680
Speaker 2: the person out in the day should pay. Yeah, And

1337
01:00:53,720 --> 01:00:55,240
Speaker 2: this wasn't to get you in trouble. I think it's

1338
01:00:55,240 --> 01:00:58,600
Speaker 2: a real discussion because I think that's what people do.

1339
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:01,959
Speaker 2: How you just said, hey, if he didn't pay, he's out,

1340
01:01:02,680 --> 01:01:04,840
Speaker 2: by the way. And I come from I was raised

1341
01:01:04,840 --> 01:01:07,000
Speaker 2: by my mom. I have a younger sister, so I

1342
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:09,680
Speaker 2: come from a very like i'll do it, I'll take

1343
01:01:09,720 --> 01:01:12,040
Speaker 2: care of it kind of background, and I did when

1344
01:01:12,080 --> 01:01:14,080
Speaker 2: me and Riley Fest started daying, I used to actually

1345
01:01:14,600 --> 01:01:19,200
Speaker 2: tutor students for their college and eleven plus exams to

1346
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:21,040
Speaker 2: make enough money to take Rady out on a date

1347
01:01:21,480 --> 01:01:24,439
Speaker 2: to make like twenty towns an hour because I didn't

1348
01:01:24,480 --> 01:01:27,040
Speaker 2: have any money when we met, and that's how we'd

1349
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:29,800
Speaker 2: pay for stuff. I think a lot of men feel, yes,

1350
01:01:29,880 --> 01:01:33,840
Speaker 2: I'll do that once we have some commitment, like once

1351
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:36,760
Speaker 2: we're going somewhere today, Like I feel like then, I'm like, well,

1352
01:01:36,760 --> 01:01:39,120
Speaker 2: why would I do that if we're both figuring this out,

1353
01:01:39,480 --> 01:01:40,920
Speaker 2: Like I would do that once we both say, hey,

1354
01:01:40,920 --> 01:01:43,800
Speaker 2: we're exclusive, we're boyfriend and girlfriend. We're in a committed

1355
01:01:43,840 --> 01:01:46,000
Speaker 2: relationship like this is going somewhere. But if it's like

1356
01:01:46,000 --> 01:01:48,440
Speaker 2: our first or second day or third day, and we

1357
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:50,160
Speaker 2: don't really even know each other, then I kind of

1358
01:01:50,200 --> 01:01:53,000
Speaker 2: want you to come and meet me hot middle because

1359
01:01:53,040 --> 01:01:54,280
Speaker 2: that's what we're trying to build.

1360
01:01:54,480 --> 01:01:56,320
Speaker 1: I mean, I can't imagine I've ever been on a

1361
01:01:56,400 --> 01:01:58,920
Speaker 1: date where I didn't ask to split it. At least

1362
01:01:59,400 --> 01:02:01,960
Speaker 1: I think I would weird if you asked to. You know, yeah,

1363
01:02:01,960 --> 01:02:03,960
Speaker 1: you pick it up all the way. That's a signal.

1364
01:02:04,240 --> 01:02:06,960
Speaker 1: That's definitely it's a signal. Let's an opt out. But

1365
01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:09,760
Speaker 1: you know, men, hey, it's a byproduct of the fact

1366
01:02:10,040 --> 01:02:13,800
Speaker 1: that we have, for the first time in our let's

1367
01:02:13,800 --> 01:02:17,680
Speaker 1: call it the last two hundred years probably of human existence,

1368
01:02:18,520 --> 01:02:20,840
Speaker 1: men and women are competing for the same thing. This

1369
01:02:20,920 --> 01:02:24,400
Speaker 1: has never really existed before. I mean, my parents were

1370
01:02:24,440 --> 01:02:27,840
Speaker 1: the first generation where this started. My grandparents, that was

1371
01:02:27,880 --> 01:02:29,840
Speaker 1: not an option. So we have to be honest about

1372
01:02:29,840 --> 01:02:31,960
Speaker 1: the fact that today, men and women, they are competing

1373
01:02:31,960 --> 01:02:35,240
Speaker 1: for jobs, they are competing for education spots, they are

1374
01:02:35,240 --> 01:02:39,120
Speaker 1: competing for relevancy, they're competing for being heard places. I mean, heck,

1375
01:02:39,160 --> 01:02:41,760
Speaker 1: in some ways, they're even competing for like necessity to

1376
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:45,200
Speaker 1: procreate with all of the modern medicine that's happening. And

1377
01:02:45,240 --> 01:02:47,840
Speaker 1: so there are going to be rippling side effects from

1378
01:02:47,840 --> 01:02:50,560
Speaker 1: this that I can't even imagine. And one of them

1379
01:02:50,640 --> 01:02:53,960
Speaker 1: is that when we say we want to be equal

1380
01:02:54,040 --> 01:02:56,840
Speaker 1: as women, well then we should think about what that means.

1381
01:02:56,880 --> 01:02:59,240
Speaker 1: And so I think young men today are very right

1382
01:02:59,440 --> 01:03:03,840
Speaker 1: to say, hey, you know, it's we're equal in every way.

1383
01:03:03,960 --> 01:03:06,400
Speaker 1: It's a partnership between the two of us. So I

1384
01:03:06,400 --> 01:03:09,440
Speaker 1: don't believe that we are partners yet. If so facto,

1385
01:03:10,280 --> 01:03:13,000
Speaker 1: let's split. And I think in life, Chris and I

1386
01:03:13,040 --> 01:03:14,360
Speaker 1: always have a saying, which is do you want to

1387
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:16,320
Speaker 1: be right or do you want to win? And so

1388
01:03:17,160 --> 01:03:19,960
Speaker 1: my thought is, if you're a young man and you

1389
01:03:19,960 --> 01:03:22,000
Speaker 1: are pursuing a woman that you really like or think

1390
01:03:22,040 --> 01:03:23,640
Speaker 1: you might like, do you want to be right or

1391
01:03:23,680 --> 01:03:25,000
Speaker 1: do you want to win? Do you want to be

1392
01:03:25,160 --> 01:03:27,520
Speaker 1: right in society that yes, she should have split the bill,

1393
01:03:27,720 --> 01:03:29,280
Speaker 1: but now you have to talk her back into a

1394
01:03:29,280 --> 01:03:31,760
Speaker 1: second day. Okay, fine, then go that way. If you're

1395
01:03:31,760 --> 01:03:34,080
Speaker 1: a young woman and you really like the guy and

1396
01:03:34,120 --> 01:03:36,080
Speaker 1: he is more comfortable with this, do you want to

1397
01:03:36,080 --> 01:03:37,640
Speaker 1: be right? Or do you want to win? Split the

1398
01:03:37,640 --> 01:03:40,000
Speaker 1: bill and then tell him at some point, hey, you know,

1399
01:03:40,040 --> 01:03:42,200
Speaker 1: if we're committed to each other, this is important to me.

1400
01:03:42,280 --> 01:03:44,919
Speaker 1: Can we negotiate it between the two of us. We're

1401
01:03:44,920 --> 01:03:47,640
Speaker 1: so busy these days pointing fingers at what's right as

1402
01:03:47,640 --> 01:03:50,040
Speaker 1: opposed to saying what do I want? And then so

1403
01:03:50,120 --> 01:03:52,080
Speaker 1: what action am I going to take to get there?

1404
01:03:52,680 --> 01:03:54,680
Speaker 1: In a world in which a lot of guys split bills,

1405
01:03:54,800 --> 01:03:57,320
Speaker 1: if you have a hard time getting chicks, be a

1406
01:03:57,360 --> 01:03:59,960
Speaker 1: pretty big upside if you can pick up the bill right.

1407
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:02,040
Speaker 1: And if you're a woman that can't find a man,

1408
01:04:02,480 --> 01:04:04,880
Speaker 1: maybe you show the man that you're a true partner.

1409
01:04:05,200 --> 01:04:07,400
Speaker 1: And like, even if he offers, you say I really

1410
01:04:07,440 --> 01:04:09,320
Speaker 1: would like to split it, wuld that make you feel comfortable?

1411
01:04:09,360 --> 01:04:12,200
Speaker 1: I want you to know that in partnership, I believe

1412
01:04:12,240 --> 01:04:14,439
Speaker 1: in being there for my man. Neither of those are wrong.

1413
01:04:14,520 --> 01:04:15,480
Speaker 1: They just might help you win.

1414
01:04:15,720 --> 01:04:18,480
Speaker 2: Definitely. I love that right and winning. There's a did

1415
01:04:18,520 --> 01:04:21,120
Speaker 2: you watch that movie fair Play? No? Okay, so there

1416
01:04:21,160 --> 01:04:22,680
Speaker 2: was a movie last year. I don't think a lot

1417
01:04:22,720 --> 01:04:24,320
Speaker 2: of people sway. It was kind of like an I

1418
01:04:24,400 --> 01:04:26,160
Speaker 2: think I don't know if it's a true indie, but

1419
01:04:26,520 --> 01:04:28,640
Speaker 2: it wasn't. It was on Netflix, but I don't think

1420
01:04:28,680 --> 01:04:31,760
Speaker 2: it was hugely popular. But it was a dark take

1421
01:04:32,440 --> 01:04:37,000
Speaker 2: on couple who were both vuying for the same job

1422
01:04:37,000 --> 01:04:41,040
Speaker 2: in a company. It's really good, like it shows. It's

1423
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:44,680
Speaker 2: definitely dark and it's definitely extreme, but it just shows

1424
01:04:44,800 --> 01:04:49,400
Speaker 2: the envy, the competition, how the gender roles have changed,

1425
01:04:49,440 --> 01:04:53,320
Speaker 2: the expectations women being more talented and educated. And you know,

1426
01:04:53,720 --> 01:04:56,919
Speaker 2: it's such a good social commentary on where we're at.

1427
01:04:57,560 --> 01:05:00,800
Speaker 2: I wonder how have you found it? Because I meet

1428
01:05:00,840 --> 01:05:04,280
Speaker 2: a lot of ambitious young women who want to do really,

1429
01:05:04,280 --> 01:05:07,720
Speaker 2: really well, and they seem to intimidate men today. And

1430
01:05:07,800 --> 01:05:09,320
Speaker 2: I look at that from the men's perspective, and I

1431
01:05:09,400 --> 01:05:11,800
Speaker 2: understand that it's new for men. A lot of men

1432
01:05:11,840 --> 01:05:16,120
Speaker 2: feel left behind. They've inherited the pain of the men

1433
01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:19,640
Speaker 2: who came before them, who've abused power or used it wrongly.

1434
01:05:21,120 --> 01:05:23,320
Speaker 2: If a woman's ambitious right now, how does she continue

1435
01:05:23,360 --> 01:05:26,120
Speaker 2: to be ambitious and still find a man that gets

1436
01:05:26,200 --> 01:05:29,280
Speaker 2: that and respects that. From a financial point.

1437
01:05:29,080 --> 01:05:31,600
Speaker 1: Of view, Yeah, the hard truth that I've found as

1438
01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:34,440
Speaker 1: a woman, who you could say is hard charging is

1439
01:05:34,520 --> 01:05:37,920
Speaker 1: that you can't play a man's game and win in

1440
01:05:37,920 --> 01:05:40,760
Speaker 1: this society, and I'm not sure we should. And so

1441
01:05:40,840 --> 01:05:43,240
Speaker 1: what do I mean by that? I mean that men

1442
01:05:43,320 --> 01:05:47,600
Speaker 1: are push push push aggressive, or even our physiology right,

1443
01:05:47,680 --> 01:05:50,960
Speaker 1: one is receiving and one is certainly given. And so

1444
01:05:51,800 --> 01:05:53,880
Speaker 1: today I think, if you are a young woman who's

1445
01:05:53,920 --> 01:05:56,200
Speaker 1: really hard charging, you have to think about are you

1446
01:05:56,360 --> 01:06:00,760
Speaker 1: being ambitious and intimidating? Are you being I'm a bitch?

1447
01:06:01,200 --> 01:06:03,400
Speaker 1: And I think a lot of times, because we've had

1448
01:06:03,520 --> 01:06:05,680
Speaker 1: we felt like we have to stand up, we have

1449
01:06:05,760 --> 01:06:07,960
Speaker 1: to push for ourselves, we're actually just not being that

1450
01:06:08,080 --> 01:06:11,720
Speaker 1: nice as women. And it's that, you know, you can

1451
01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:13,560
Speaker 1: go get a girl and you don't need a man,

1452
01:06:13,960 --> 01:06:16,520
Speaker 1: and he's not listening to you, and you know, blah

1453
01:06:16,520 --> 01:06:19,920
Speaker 1: blah blah. That energy is really negative. Men don't need that.

1454
01:06:20,320 --> 01:06:21,920
Speaker 1: The two women that I that I know that are

1455
01:06:21,960 --> 01:06:25,720
Speaker 1: lovely and they're single, and you know, everybody I know

1456
01:06:25,840 --> 01:06:27,800
Speaker 1: tells them all the time, I can't believe you're single.

1457
01:06:27,800 --> 01:06:29,840
Speaker 1: You shouldn't be single. But what do they say? Often

1458
01:06:29,920 --> 01:06:32,200
Speaker 1: one of them who I adore, and I kind of

1459
01:06:32,240 --> 01:06:34,439
Speaker 1: have given her my opinion on this, but she says

1460
01:06:34,480 --> 01:06:37,560
Speaker 1: all the time, well, I don't want to like mother anymore. Men,

1461
01:06:37,760 --> 01:06:39,520
Speaker 1: I don't want to mother them like you know what

1462
01:06:39,640 --> 01:06:42,680
Speaker 1: all these boys like, Well, if you keep calling them that,

1463
01:06:42,920 --> 01:06:45,280
Speaker 1: then that is what they will be. And so you've

1464
01:06:45,280 --> 01:06:48,760
Speaker 1: got to be really careful about not demasculating men. And

1465
01:06:48,800 --> 01:06:50,920
Speaker 1: you've got to be really careful about making sure that

1466
01:06:50,920 --> 01:06:52,560
Speaker 1: they care about the two things they care about more

1467
01:06:52,560 --> 01:06:54,400
Speaker 1: of the women do, which is which they care about

1468
01:06:54,480 --> 01:06:57,439
Speaker 1: respect and you know, women, really we want to be loved.

1469
01:06:57,520 --> 01:06:59,400
Speaker 1: You guys want to be respected, right like buy and

1470
01:06:59,480 --> 01:07:03,040
Speaker 1: large grow generalization, and so in driving businesses, I have

1471
01:07:03,080 --> 01:07:04,800
Speaker 1: to remember that all the time. I employment, I just

1472
01:07:04,800 --> 01:07:08,040
Speaker 1: had a conversation right before this where I steamrolled somebody.

1473
01:07:08,280 --> 01:07:12,440
Speaker 1: I totally owned the entire meeting. I just kept talking

1474
01:07:12,880 --> 01:07:15,400
Speaker 1: and I was really aggressive and I lectured a little

1475
01:07:15,400 --> 01:07:19,080
Speaker 1: bit in the meeting, and thankfully my person in this

1476
01:07:19,200 --> 01:07:21,840
Speaker 1: situation was like, hey, by the way, I felt a

1477
01:07:21,880 --> 01:07:24,160
Speaker 1: little bit like a lecture, felt like they needed to

1478
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:27,280
Speaker 1: be heard, not pushed so much. And I was like, God,

1479
01:07:27,400 --> 01:07:30,520
Speaker 1: you're right. And that's when like the negative feminine shows

1480
01:07:30,600 --> 01:07:33,320
Speaker 1: up in my mind, is when we think, let me

1481
01:07:33,440 --> 01:07:36,320
Speaker 1: just keep going, I'm going to pound on this. So

1482
01:07:36,360 --> 01:07:38,280
Speaker 1: I would push back on the negative. Are you really

1483
01:07:38,320 --> 01:07:42,120
Speaker 1: intimidating men or are you being mean? And I think

1484
01:07:42,200 --> 01:07:44,680
Speaker 1: often we are being a little mean, and so we

1485
01:07:44,720 --> 01:07:46,800
Speaker 1: need to pull that back. Not all men want to

1486
01:07:46,840 --> 01:07:49,240
Speaker 1: dominate you. You know a lot of men are the

1487
01:07:49,240 --> 01:07:50,400
Speaker 1: best mentors I've ever had.

1488
01:07:50,800 --> 01:07:55,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's that hard part for women because men

1489
01:07:55,720 --> 01:07:57,920
Speaker 2: for so long have gotten away with pounding the payment right.

1490
01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:00,240
Speaker 2: So like if a mind behaved in a meaning, would

1491
01:08:00,240 --> 01:08:03,520
Speaker 2: he get the same feedback? Absolutely absolutely not. He'd just

1492
01:08:03,560 --> 01:08:06,280
Speaker 2: be told that's normal, and he'd get away with it

1493
01:08:06,320 --> 01:08:08,960
Speaker 2: and he'd move on. And so it's almost what people

1494
01:08:09,000 --> 01:08:11,160
Speaker 2: expect of you, and it shouldn't be based on gender.

1495
01:08:11,200 --> 01:08:14,360
Speaker 2: It should be based on your demeanor. Like, for example,

1496
01:08:14,360 --> 01:08:17,719
Speaker 2: I'm not someone who gets angry or shouts at people

1497
01:08:17,800 --> 01:08:19,640
Speaker 2: or it's just not who I am, So if I

1498
01:08:19,720 --> 01:08:22,120
Speaker 2: did it, it would be so out of character that I

1499
01:08:22,160 --> 01:08:24,880
Speaker 2: think someone would cry. You know. It's like you think

1500
01:08:24,920 --> 01:08:26,800
Speaker 2: the person who shouts you every day makes you cry. No, no, no,

1501
01:08:26,840 --> 01:08:30,080
Speaker 2: it's the person who's really silent and calm that if

1502
01:08:30,120 --> 01:08:33,240
Speaker 2: they lost it, you'd be heartbroken because you don't expect

1503
01:08:33,280 --> 01:08:36,280
Speaker 2: it from them. And I think this all gets difficult

1504
01:08:36,280 --> 01:08:41,280
Speaker 2: when we're talking about money, because money creates power dynamics

1505
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:46,080
Speaker 2: it creates, especially in couples, it creates power dynamics in families.

1506
01:08:46,680 --> 01:08:48,679
Speaker 2: I mean the amount of friends I've had recently who've

1507
01:08:48,880 --> 01:08:51,599
Speaker 2: both men and women, have had to ask their partner

1508
01:08:51,600 --> 01:08:54,400
Speaker 2: to sign a prenup before they get married. And it's

1509
01:08:54,439 --> 01:08:57,880
Speaker 2: been really uncomfortable because you hope that we love each

1510
01:08:57,880 --> 01:08:59,519
Speaker 2: other and that we would never have to do that.

1511
01:09:00,040 --> 01:09:01,840
Speaker 2: My friends have talked to me, that's really odd. What's

1512
01:09:01,880 --> 01:09:04,200
Speaker 2: your take on people having to sign a prenup before

1513
01:09:04,200 --> 01:09:04,840
Speaker 2: they get married.

1514
01:09:05,080 --> 01:09:07,720
Speaker 1: I think you should always sign a prenup before you

1515
01:09:07,720 --> 01:09:08,160
Speaker 1: get married.

1516
01:09:08,200 --> 01:09:08,400
Speaker 2: Wow.

1517
01:09:08,760 --> 01:09:11,040
Speaker 1: I think you should have every hard conversation that you

1518
01:09:11,080 --> 01:09:14,040
Speaker 1: need to have up front, and that is just another

1519
01:09:14,080 --> 01:09:17,120
Speaker 1: hard conversation. You know what a prenup will tell you

1520
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:19,519
Speaker 1: before you get married is do you guys have the

1521
01:09:19,520 --> 01:09:21,680
Speaker 1: same vision for life? Do you guys care about the

1522
01:09:21,680 --> 01:09:24,559
Speaker 1: same things? How do you handle conflict between the two

1523
01:09:24,600 --> 01:09:27,360
Speaker 1: of you? Can you guys compromise on the important part? So,

1524
01:09:27,400 --> 01:09:30,000
Speaker 1: even if it's not about the money, like your bank account,

1525
01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:32,600
Speaker 1: is a reflection of how willing you are to have

1526
01:09:32,640 --> 01:09:35,640
Speaker 1: difficult conversations. The more you delay and the more you

1527
01:09:35,680 --> 01:09:37,920
Speaker 1: don't have, the less money you'll have. And I think

1528
01:09:37,960 --> 01:09:40,640
Speaker 1: a prenup is a perfect example. You can take it

1529
01:09:40,680 --> 01:09:42,920
Speaker 1: as a victim and say, if he's asking me for

1530
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:45,200
Speaker 1: a prenup, that means that he does not want to

1531
01:09:45,240 --> 01:09:46,800
Speaker 1: stay with me, or she does not want to stay

1532
01:09:46,800 --> 01:09:49,520
Speaker 1: with me, or you could say this is an opportunity

1533
01:09:49,560 --> 01:09:52,280
Speaker 1: for us to determine what are life will look like

1534
01:09:52,439 --> 01:09:54,760
Speaker 1: together and what is his and what is mine and

1535
01:09:54,760 --> 01:09:56,920
Speaker 1: what is ours together? And so I am a big

1536
01:09:56,960 --> 01:09:59,599
Speaker 1: proponent of get that prene up on either side, get

1537
01:09:59,680 --> 01:10:03,200
Speaker 1: real clear on your finances, and have a crucial conversation

1538
01:10:03,439 --> 01:10:06,840
Speaker 1: up front. Now that said, I really try to never

1539
01:10:06,880 --> 01:10:09,680
Speaker 1: give like individualized one on one advice. I'm sure you're

1540
01:10:09,760 --> 01:10:11,920
Speaker 1: kind of the same. So it's like, here's the big

1541
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:14,760
Speaker 1: giant you. But you know, when my brother and new

1542
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:16,960
Speaker 1: sister in law came to me, they were like, should

1543
01:10:16,960 --> 01:10:19,120
Speaker 1: you once you get married, should you have a joint

1544
01:10:19,120 --> 01:10:22,000
Speaker 1: bank account or should you have a separate bank account?

1545
01:10:22,240 --> 01:10:26,000
Speaker 1: I said, you should have a hard talk first, and

1546
01:10:26,040 --> 01:10:29,920
Speaker 1: you should ask each other why you want each separate segment,

1547
01:10:30,280 --> 01:10:33,320
Speaker 1: because what is the real conversation you're having. It's do

1548
01:10:33,400 --> 01:10:35,920
Speaker 1: I trust your spending? Are we going to communicate well?

1549
01:10:36,040 --> 01:10:37,599
Speaker 1: Are you going to put me in a weird situation.

1550
01:10:37,760 --> 01:10:39,360
Speaker 1: Are you going to tell me I can't do something?

1551
01:10:39,360 --> 01:10:41,040
Speaker 1: I'm an adult, don't tell me what I can't do.

1552
01:10:41,439 --> 01:10:44,040
Speaker 1: And so it's not really about money. It's about can

1553
01:10:44,080 --> 01:10:46,519
Speaker 1: you get on the same page. Yes, and so forget

1554
01:10:46,520 --> 01:10:48,400
Speaker 1: the bank account, right, it's really can you have a

1555
01:10:48,400 --> 01:10:51,919
Speaker 1: hard conversation? And there's no right or wrong. In my opinion,

1556
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:55,839
Speaker 1: some people say they still venmo each other their partners

1557
01:10:55,880 --> 01:10:57,920
Speaker 1: back and forth, and they're like, that's awful. How could

1558
01:10:57,960 --> 01:11:00,840
Speaker 1: you do that? That is the up to you. A

1559
01:11:00,880 --> 01:11:03,280
Speaker 1: lot of my like you know, big friends in finance

1560
01:11:03,280 --> 01:11:05,679
Speaker 1: would say, if you get married, you have a joint

1561
01:11:05,680 --> 01:11:08,040
Speaker 1: bank account, that's what you do. And I would say

1562
01:11:08,160 --> 01:11:10,760
Speaker 1: even having a joint bank account can be hugely problematic

1563
01:11:10,760 --> 01:11:12,040
Speaker 1: if you're not willing to talk about it.

1564
01:11:12,040 --> 01:11:14,320
Speaker 2: Absolutely no. I love how practical that gets, and I

1565
01:11:14,680 --> 01:11:16,559
Speaker 2: love how practical you always get because that is what

1566
01:11:16,600 --> 01:11:18,920
Speaker 2: people are dealing with. And you're right, it's not about money.

1567
01:11:18,960 --> 01:11:22,599
Speaker 2: It's about power, it's about agency, it's about accountability, it's

1568
01:11:22,600 --> 01:11:26,200
Speaker 2: about all these other things. But money becomes the central

1569
01:11:26,240 --> 01:11:28,800
Speaker 2: point of conflict. And you're right, just because you have

1570
01:11:29,040 --> 01:11:31,600
Speaker 2: a joint bank account doesn't mean you have better compatibility.

1571
01:11:31,640 --> 01:11:34,600
Speaker 2: That means nothing if you haven't had the hard conversation.

1572
01:11:35,400 --> 01:11:39,200
Speaker 2: And I think having the hard conversation early about money

1573
01:11:39,240 --> 01:11:43,040
Speaker 2: and expectations is so important. Going back to your earlier point,

1574
01:11:43,040 --> 01:11:46,200
Speaker 2: which I was thinking about that idea that it's really

1575
01:11:46,240 --> 01:11:49,439
Speaker 2: important how married couples end up making more money. I

1576
01:11:49,520 --> 01:11:52,360
Speaker 2: found a lot of people recently looking for a business partner,

1577
01:11:52,640 --> 01:11:55,519
Speaker 2: not a partner, so like when they're looking for someone

1578
01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:58,320
Speaker 2: to be with, they're kind of seeing, will this person

1579
01:11:58,400 --> 01:12:03,519
Speaker 2: help me build my business? Which is a really interesting,

1580
01:12:03,600 --> 01:12:06,479
Speaker 2: you know, difference to what love is. What's your take

1581
01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:08,360
Speaker 2: on finding a partner or a business partner?

1582
01:12:08,479 --> 01:12:11,320
Speaker 1: That's fascinating. Well, I mean, isn't it funny how everything

1583
01:12:11,360 --> 01:12:13,240
Speaker 1: just comes full circle. So if we think about the

1584
01:12:13,280 --> 01:12:17,639
Speaker 1: original contract of marriage, it was business. It was can

1585
01:12:17,720 --> 01:12:20,599
Speaker 1: your family further my family, and we will come into

1586
01:12:20,600 --> 01:12:22,559
Speaker 1: contractual agreement one way or the other. Was that way

1587
01:12:22,560 --> 01:12:24,920
Speaker 1: in India and the UK, It was that way here

1588
01:12:24,960 --> 01:12:28,000
Speaker 1: in the US, and so that marriage was a business contract,

1589
01:12:28,080 --> 01:12:30,120
Speaker 1: and in some ways it still really is because it's

1590
01:12:30,120 --> 01:12:33,160
Speaker 1: a government contract and so and then for a long time,

1591
01:12:33,200 --> 01:12:35,519
Speaker 1: well not that long really, what a generation or two,

1592
01:12:35,680 --> 01:12:39,439
Speaker 1: it became love it was about love only that's actually

1593
01:12:39,479 --> 01:12:41,960
Speaker 1: a new construct and so I think it's interesting it's

1594
01:12:42,000 --> 01:12:43,600
Speaker 1: coming back to this idea of partnership.

1595
01:12:43,600 --> 01:12:43,760
Speaker 2: Now.

1596
01:12:43,760 --> 01:12:46,400
Speaker 1: I have a personal bias. I think that you should

1597
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:48,800
Speaker 1: marry somebody if you believe that they will help get

1598
01:12:48,840 --> 01:12:50,960
Speaker 1: you out of a third world prison when you get

1599
01:12:51,040 --> 01:12:53,599
Speaker 1: in prisoned, you know, is this going to be your

1600
01:12:53,720 --> 01:12:56,920
Speaker 1: person who will save you in your times of difficulty.

1601
01:12:56,960 --> 01:13:00,479
Speaker 1: That's to me what a good partnership is. It's trust

1602
01:13:00,520 --> 01:13:02,639
Speaker 1: this year and with my life implicitly, and I want

1603
01:13:02,680 --> 01:13:05,280
Speaker 1: to build with them. Yes, I love them, but it's

1604
01:13:05,360 --> 01:13:09,240
Speaker 1: not this like, oh, this victimized like I love them

1605
01:13:09,280 --> 01:13:12,439
Speaker 1: even if they beat me and if the world you know, ends,

1606
01:13:12,520 --> 01:13:14,880
Speaker 1: and some of the things we see in books today.

1607
01:13:15,280 --> 01:13:17,479
Speaker 1: It's like, no, is this my chosen human human who

1608
01:13:17,520 --> 01:13:19,559
Speaker 1: were going to go through time together and I trust

1609
01:13:19,560 --> 01:13:23,400
Speaker 1: their ability and who they are. So that's for me personally.

1610
01:13:23,760 --> 01:13:27,880
Speaker 1: The flip side of that is it's really hard working

1611
01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:30,840
Speaker 1: with your spouse. We both do it in many ways.

1612
01:13:31,200 --> 01:13:34,000
Speaker 1: My husband runs our investment side of our fund, our

1613
01:13:34,000 --> 01:13:37,400
Speaker 1: holding company and our Vungure Capital fund. And our first

1614
01:13:37,479 --> 01:13:39,880
Speaker 1: hardest year together was our first year of marriage. We

1615
01:13:40,640 --> 01:13:42,599
Speaker 1: got married a little older, and so I didn't really

1616
01:13:42,680 --> 01:13:44,479
Speaker 1: know how to compromise. He didn't neither. It was really

1617
01:13:44,520 --> 01:13:46,360
Speaker 1: hard for us our first year, and I hear that's

1618
01:13:46,360 --> 01:13:49,360
Speaker 1: a common thing. Our second hardest year was the first

1619
01:13:49,439 --> 01:13:51,880
Speaker 1: year that we got into business together. And I was like,

1620
01:13:52,000 --> 01:13:54,920
Speaker 1: huge mistake. You know, where's the like pull the shoot?

1621
01:13:55,280 --> 01:13:57,800
Speaker 1: This is so hard? Why because anytime you put two

1622
01:13:57,800 --> 01:14:00,800
Speaker 1: things closer together, what do they do? Friction? Baby? You know,

1623
01:14:00,960 --> 01:14:04,080
Speaker 1: it's just natural, this is physics. And so I don't

1624
01:14:04,080 --> 01:14:06,400
Speaker 1: know why I was surprised, but I was surprised. And

1625
01:14:06,600 --> 01:14:09,040
Speaker 1: then I realized after we got through the first year,

1626
01:14:09,240 --> 01:14:12,120
Speaker 1: I was like, how did I ever do it? Where

1627
01:14:12,160 --> 01:14:14,360
Speaker 1: I had a human who couldn't understand some of the

1628
01:14:14,400 --> 01:14:16,639
Speaker 1: stuff I was going through at work. He is such

1629
01:14:16,640 --> 01:14:18,800
Speaker 1: a crutch for me now and I am for him.

1630
01:14:19,040 --> 01:14:22,360
Speaker 1: So now I'm kind of a proponent of by personal bias.

1631
01:14:22,600 --> 01:14:25,559
Speaker 1: There's nothing better than having the ability to truly understand

1632
01:14:25,560 --> 01:14:27,559
Speaker 1: what your spouse does for a living and intertwining it

1633
01:14:27,680 --> 01:14:28,040
Speaker 1: some way.

1634
01:14:28,600 --> 01:14:31,040
Speaker 2: What do you think we were together for a long

1635
01:14:31,120 --> 01:14:35,240
Speaker 2: time before we launched a business together. There's a couple

1636
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:37,360
Speaker 2: of things I have that I take. It's almost like,

1637
01:14:38,200 --> 01:14:42,880
Speaker 2: so I never wanted my wife to support my work

1638
01:14:43,160 --> 01:14:45,479
Speaker 2: when my career was taking off from the beginning, and

1639
01:14:45,560 --> 01:14:48,840
Speaker 2: my reason for that was very clear. I knew a

1640
01:14:48,840 --> 01:14:51,560
Speaker 2: lot of men who are extremely successful in their fifties

1641
01:14:51,680 --> 01:14:55,280
Speaker 2: after three decades of success, where their partners had become

1642
01:14:55,320 --> 01:14:59,360
Speaker 2: basically their assistance, and at the age of fifty, their

1643
01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:03,639
Speaker 2: partner now felt that they didn't achieve their dreams because

1644
01:15:03,680 --> 01:15:06,240
Speaker 2: they felt they didn't achieve their potential. And the guy

1645
01:15:06,280 --> 01:15:08,160
Speaker 2: had gone off and ticked off every box on his

1646
01:15:08,240 --> 01:15:10,759
Speaker 2: checklist and felt like a champion. But now at fifty,

1647
01:15:10,760 --> 01:15:13,519
Speaker 2: they're having this realization. And because I saw so much

1648
01:15:13,560 --> 01:15:17,040
Speaker 2: of that and my own work on purpose, I was

1649
01:15:17,080 --> 01:15:21,360
Speaker 2: really clear that everyone has their own purpose, like everyone

1650
01:15:21,400 --> 01:15:24,800
Speaker 2: has their own offering that makes them feel significant. And

1651
01:15:24,840 --> 01:15:28,200
Speaker 2: no matter how much you love someone, no matter what

1652
01:15:28,240 --> 01:15:32,240
Speaker 2: anyone says, you cannot say that your significance is just

1653
01:15:32,320 --> 01:15:36,000
Speaker 2: tied to someone else's significance. You have to have something

1654
01:15:36,040 --> 01:15:39,599
Speaker 2: that feels like your own thing that feels meaningful to you.

1655
01:15:40,400 --> 01:15:42,479
Speaker 2: That could be your child, it could be your business,

1656
01:15:42,479 --> 01:15:45,800
Speaker 2: it could be coaching the college basketball team. Right, this

1657
01:15:45,880 --> 01:15:48,479
Speaker 2: isn't about building a business. And so all I would

1658
01:15:48,520 --> 01:15:51,160
Speaker 2: encourage Rady to do was to find her thing. My

1659
01:15:51,200 --> 01:15:53,080
Speaker 2: favorite thing was setting her up on girl dates. I'd

1660
01:15:53,080 --> 01:15:55,759
Speaker 2: become friends with women, just introduce them to my wife.

1661
01:15:55,880 --> 01:15:58,080
Speaker 2: She'd be like, what are you doing, You're weirdo, But

1662
01:15:58,120 --> 01:16:01,479
Speaker 2: they're now her best friends, so I guess, well, yeah, exactly.

1663
01:16:02,160 --> 01:16:04,320
Speaker 2: But my whole goal was just I don't want her

1664
01:16:04,320 --> 01:16:07,679
Speaker 2: to fall into the trap of Jay's doing really cool stuff.

1665
01:16:07,720 --> 01:16:11,040
Speaker 2: I'm just going to help him and then feel like

1666
01:16:11,080 --> 01:16:14,000
Speaker 2: she didn't find herself. And you see women do this

1667
01:16:14,000 --> 01:16:17,000
Speaker 2: more than men doing this. Men generally are more independent,

1668
01:16:17,040 --> 01:16:18,720
Speaker 2: they know their thing, or they don't want to be

1669
01:16:18,800 --> 01:16:22,240
Speaker 2: involved anyway. And she was so talented and skilled and

1670
01:16:22,560 --> 01:16:24,680
Speaker 2: amazing from the moment I met her that I was like,

1671
01:16:25,360 --> 01:16:27,479
Speaker 2: I mean, like Riley could have a TV show and

1672
01:16:27,479 --> 01:16:31,160
Speaker 2: it would crush, like she's just the most magnetic elector Yeah,

1673
01:16:31,200 --> 01:16:33,479
Speaker 2: she's just so lovable, right, So I was like, she

1674
01:16:33,600 --> 01:16:35,320
Speaker 2: deserves to have all all herself, and she found out

1675
01:16:35,320 --> 01:16:37,960
Speaker 2: as time went on. When we found a June, we

1676
01:16:37,960 --> 01:16:40,880
Speaker 2: were both at such a strength in our knowledge of

1677
01:16:40,880 --> 01:16:43,840
Speaker 2: each other's strengths and weaknesses. But we don't take any

1678
01:16:43,880 --> 01:16:47,920
Speaker 2: meetings together zero zero. So she does all the formulation

1679
01:16:48,080 --> 01:16:53,320
Speaker 2: meetings of the taste the flavor profile, the mixtures, all

1680
01:16:53,360 --> 01:16:55,959
Speaker 2: of that. She does everything to do with the colors

1681
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:58,800
Speaker 2: and the packaging and everything else, and I'll do all

1682
01:16:58,840 --> 01:17:01,599
Speaker 2: the business and marketing calls, and so we're never even

1683
01:17:01,600 --> 01:17:04,719
Speaker 2: on the same calls. And that works for us because

1684
01:17:04,760 --> 01:17:07,200
Speaker 2: it actually splits up the work because I'm like, oh,

1685
01:17:07,240 --> 01:17:10,479
Speaker 2: I trust you you can nail like my palette is basic,

1686
01:17:10,720 --> 01:17:13,040
Speaker 2: and you know, it's like I knew nothing about you

1687
01:17:13,200 --> 01:17:15,640
Speaker 2: Zu Pineapple when I met Radi, or you've got the

1688
01:17:15,640 --> 01:17:17,840
Speaker 2: peach one over there, like I had no clue. She

1689
01:17:17,960 --> 01:17:20,960
Speaker 2: really gets that and I really get my part, and

1690
01:17:21,280 --> 01:17:23,840
Speaker 2: that works well for us. But we founded this like

1691
01:17:23,880 --> 01:17:26,360
Speaker 2: ten years into our relationship, and so there was such

1692
01:17:26,400 --> 01:17:28,800
Speaker 2: an understanding of each other that it split it up

1693
01:17:28,880 --> 01:17:29,559
Speaker 2: nicely for us.

1694
01:17:29,640 --> 01:17:31,679
Speaker 1: It's you know what, when you say it out loud

1695
01:17:31,720 --> 01:17:33,479
Speaker 1: like that, I'm like, oh, that's actually similar in a

1696
01:17:33,520 --> 01:17:35,400
Speaker 1: lot of ways, because our reasons for friction in the

1697
01:17:35,400 --> 01:17:39,639
Speaker 1: beginning were because we were two captains. Yes, two captains

1698
01:17:39,720 --> 01:17:43,280
Speaker 1: don't work. No, it's so you know, I was on

1699
01:17:43,320 --> 01:17:45,200
Speaker 1: their trying and he was trying to. And now he

1700
01:17:45,360 --> 01:17:48,360
Speaker 1: runs our investment business entirely, and like, you know, shout

1701
01:17:48,360 --> 01:17:50,000
Speaker 1: out to him. He gets so embarrassed because I love

1702
01:17:50,080 --> 01:17:52,439
Speaker 1: bragging on him. But you know, he has like one

1703
01:17:52,439 --> 01:17:55,439
Speaker 1: of the top performing funds for his whole twenty twenty

1704
01:17:55,479 --> 01:17:59,840
Speaker 1: two vintage, and people always say congratulations, and I'm always like, honestly,

1705
01:18:00,400 --> 01:18:01,680
Speaker 1: I did so little for that.

1706
01:18:02,200 --> 01:18:02,400
Speaker 2: You know.

1707
01:18:02,479 --> 01:18:04,880
Speaker 1: I'm I'm good at like top of funnel, bring people in.

1708
01:18:05,280 --> 01:18:08,160
Speaker 1: And then he is really good at execution. And he's

1709
01:18:08,200 --> 01:18:10,880
Speaker 1: a hunter. He chases things down. And so you're right

1710
01:18:10,960 --> 01:18:12,360
Speaker 1: now that we now I think about it. I'm on

1711
01:18:12,400 --> 01:18:15,679
Speaker 1: two calls a week with him, but he runs everything

1712
01:18:15,680 --> 01:18:19,360
Speaker 1: else and does it much better. And actually our only

1713
01:18:19,400 --> 01:18:23,799
Speaker 1: annoying spots are when I'm like weaseling in on something

1714
01:18:24,400 --> 01:18:26,880
Speaker 1: that like he's our I got it, I got it, Like,

1715
01:18:26,880 --> 01:18:29,000
Speaker 1: don't bother me over here. So it's it's you know,

1716
01:18:29,160 --> 01:18:30,400
Speaker 1: I'm I'm the weasel in.

1717
01:18:33,400 --> 01:18:35,080
Speaker 2: Robbie. Wait a minute, where have you been for the

1718
01:18:35,520 --> 01:18:37,960
Speaker 2: seven months we've been working on this and now you

1719
01:18:37,960 --> 01:18:39,000
Speaker 2: want to give your opinions?

1720
01:18:39,120 --> 01:18:40,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you making me feel better.

1721
01:18:40,800 --> 01:18:43,400
Speaker 2: Hey, I'm that guy too. Gosh, where did you turn

1722
01:18:43,479 --> 01:18:45,160
Speaker 2: up from? Like I've been working so hard on this?

1723
01:18:45,360 --> 01:18:47,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, he says, He'll be like, here's the summary I

1724
01:18:47,120 --> 01:18:49,120
Speaker 1: sent you four times and now you want to talk

1725
01:18:49,120 --> 01:18:52,760
Speaker 1: about it. But you know, we are endearing sometimes, you know.

1726
01:18:52,960 --> 01:18:56,679
Speaker 2: Sometimes Yeah, But that's what's so important, right, it's trust

1727
01:18:57,240 --> 01:18:59,800
Speaker 2: to me. I just don't want my private time with

1728
01:18:59,840 --> 01:19:03,880
Speaker 2: the rody to become business time. And that's a personal choice.

1729
01:19:03,960 --> 01:19:05,560
Speaker 2: I don't look down on someone who does it. I

1730
01:19:05,560 --> 01:19:07,920
Speaker 2: don't think it's I don't think that's the best for

1731
01:19:08,400 --> 01:19:10,519
Speaker 2: business or whatever, but it's the best for me. I

1732
01:19:10,560 --> 01:19:13,000
Speaker 2: married Ridley because I like spending time with her. I

1733
01:19:13,040 --> 01:19:14,600
Speaker 2: didn't marry her so that we could talk about how

1734
01:19:14,640 --> 01:19:16,920
Speaker 2: to make more money together. Like that just wasn't That's

1735
01:19:16,920 --> 01:19:19,000
Speaker 2: not why we're together. And that's not a bad thing

1736
01:19:19,080 --> 01:19:20,880
Speaker 2: or a good thing. It's just who we are. It

1737
01:19:20,960 --> 01:19:21,559
Speaker 2: works for us.

1738
01:19:21,680 --> 01:19:23,679
Speaker 1: It's true. I actually haven't found a lot of people

1739
01:19:23,800 --> 01:19:26,000
Speaker 1: that are like that usually, And now I have a

1740
01:19:26,040 --> 01:19:29,160
Speaker 1: lot of friends, probably just selection bias, who both work together,

1741
01:19:29,600 --> 01:19:31,800
Speaker 1: but they're very different, you know. And usually you have

1742
01:19:31,840 --> 01:19:33,639
Speaker 1: one person who I kind of joke is like more

1743
01:19:33,680 --> 01:19:35,439
Speaker 1: of the fun. They're the one that's like, let's go

1744
01:19:35,520 --> 01:19:38,080
Speaker 1: do activities, let's do whatever. They're still working a lot,

1745
01:19:38,200 --> 01:19:40,400
Speaker 1: and then you have sort of the fun sponge, which

1746
01:19:40,439 --> 01:19:43,280
Speaker 1: is me, you know, it's always working and without my

1747
01:19:43,400 --> 01:19:46,000
Speaker 1: fun guy, I would just be working all the time.

1748
01:19:46,320 --> 01:19:48,800
Speaker 1: And so it is this balance. I mean, I've become

1749
01:19:48,840 --> 01:19:51,439
Speaker 1: friends with Sean rad who's the founder of Tinder, and

1750
01:19:51,760 --> 01:19:53,840
Speaker 1: what's so interesting every time I talk to him We're

1751
01:19:53,840 --> 01:19:56,920
Speaker 1: going to see him tomorrow night, is that he has

1752
01:19:56,920 --> 01:20:00,000
Speaker 1: all this data on when relationships are the most successful.

1753
01:20:00,640 --> 01:20:02,680
Speaker 1: It's like the problem with a lot of these algorithms

1754
01:20:02,680 --> 01:20:05,240
Speaker 1: and how they do dating is that actually the things

1755
01:20:05,280 --> 01:20:09,040
Speaker 1: that we choose do not lead to happiness, such as similarity.

1756
01:20:09,439 --> 01:20:13,320
Speaker 1: Similarity actually doesn't lead to us happy of relationships, according

1757
01:20:13,360 --> 01:20:16,760
Speaker 1: to Sean and his dad. And that tracks for me each.

1758
01:20:16,600 --> 01:20:19,679
Speaker 2: From us too. You know, Roddy's the playful and the series. Yeah,

1759
01:20:19,880 --> 01:20:23,240
Speaker 2: and I've always said that that playful and that performance

1760
01:20:23,479 --> 01:20:27,000
Speaker 2: mindset works so well together because you're balancing each other out.

1761
01:20:27,400 --> 01:20:30,519
Speaker 2: But first, here's a quick word from the brands that

1762
01:20:30,560 --> 01:20:34,280
Speaker 2: support the show. All right, thank you to our sponsors.

1763
01:20:34,560 --> 01:20:35,760
Speaker 2: Now let's dive back in.

1764
01:20:36,120 --> 01:20:37,880
Speaker 1: You know, isn't that funny? And that's most things in

1765
01:20:37,960 --> 01:20:39,800
Speaker 1: life too, Like if you want to make a lot

1766
01:20:39,800 --> 01:20:43,040
Speaker 1: of money in business, you also need somebody who they

1767
01:20:43,080 --> 01:20:44,880
Speaker 1: call them the visionary, right, the person who has all

1768
01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:48,520
Speaker 1: the ideas, the crazy things, and then you have your executor,

1769
01:20:48,560 --> 01:20:51,280
Speaker 1: which is often called your implementor. And so if you

1770
01:20:51,439 --> 01:20:54,479
Speaker 1: only have vision but you have no execution, you will

1771
01:20:54,479 --> 01:20:57,000
Speaker 1: fail and make no money. If you only have execution

1772
01:20:57,120 --> 01:20:59,040
Speaker 1: but you have no vision, you will play small games

1773
01:20:59,040 --> 01:21:01,960
Speaker 1: for life. So there's a great book actually called have

1774
01:21:02,040 --> 01:21:05,040
Speaker 1: you read How to Make a Few Billion dollars? No,

1775
01:21:05,320 --> 01:21:07,200
Speaker 1: it's a good book. It's by this guy, Brad Jacobs.

1776
01:21:07,439 --> 01:21:09,479
Speaker 1: If you could get him on the podcast, I will listen.

1777
01:21:09,680 --> 01:21:11,719
Speaker 1: I've been trying to. I don't know if he's your style,

1778
01:21:11,760 --> 01:21:13,880
Speaker 1: but he's well, actually he might be. He was like,

1779
01:21:13,960 --> 01:21:17,960
Speaker 1: he's a multi billionaire hedge fund manager and private equity investor,

1780
01:21:18,560 --> 01:21:21,040
Speaker 1: and he started off as a jazz musician and that

1781
01:21:21,160 --> 01:21:23,000
Speaker 1: was going to be his calling. So he really likes

1782
01:21:23,240 --> 01:21:25,719
Speaker 1: like dissonant noises and like, how do you pull things

1783
01:21:25,760 --> 01:21:28,479
Speaker 1: together and sort of make them play like a jazz musician?

1784
01:21:28,520 --> 01:21:31,360
Speaker 1: Mark Anyway, he's bought all of these companies. He's massively successful.

1785
01:21:31,760 --> 01:21:33,840
Speaker 1: But he always talks about what makes a great deal.

1786
01:21:33,960 --> 01:21:35,400
Speaker 1: If you want to make a lot of money, you've

1787
01:21:35,400 --> 01:21:37,120
Speaker 1: got to pick the right deal. And there's sort of

1788
01:21:37,160 --> 01:21:38,840
Speaker 1: four types of deals. You could think about it like

1789
01:21:38,880 --> 01:21:42,160
Speaker 1: a quadrant. You could have a low risk and you

1790
01:21:42,200 --> 01:21:45,479
Speaker 1: could also have a low reward deal. That's actually most

1791
01:21:45,479 --> 01:21:48,479
Speaker 1: deals in life, right, that's like stay in your same job,

1792
01:21:48,520 --> 01:21:50,360
Speaker 1: don't take risks, et cetera. The problem is you're not

1793
01:21:50,360 --> 01:21:53,679
Speaker 1: going to make much money. Then you have a high risk,

1794
01:21:54,200 --> 01:21:57,760
Speaker 1: high reward deal. Well, that could be like investing in

1795
01:21:57,760 --> 01:22:01,519
Speaker 1: an El Salvadoranian power plant. It's just so likely to

1796
01:22:01,560 --> 01:22:05,200
Speaker 1: fail that even though it's super high profit, we probably

1797
01:22:05,200 --> 01:22:07,599
Speaker 1: want to stay away from those. And then you have

1798
01:22:07,680 --> 01:22:09,720
Speaker 1: sort of the golden child, which is how can we

1799
01:22:09,800 --> 01:22:15,160
Speaker 1: have high reward low risk. Well, not many of those exist, right,

1800
01:22:15,200 --> 01:22:17,479
Speaker 1: that would be a unicorn. So what we're really looking

1801
01:22:17,520 --> 01:22:20,000
Speaker 1: for is where is there a big, hairy problem that

1802
01:22:20,040 --> 01:22:22,519
Speaker 1: has the right amount of risk and if we can

1803
01:22:22,560 --> 01:22:26,599
Speaker 1: find that, then we have profit. And so now they

1804
01:22:26,600 --> 01:22:28,840
Speaker 1: call it hair on a deal. That's like you know,

1805
01:22:28,880 --> 01:22:31,719
Speaker 1: investing terms. You want to look for those hairy deals

1806
01:22:31,760 --> 01:22:34,160
Speaker 1: where you think, oh, that level of risk is manageable.

1807
01:22:34,479 --> 01:22:36,200
Speaker 1: And in our culture, for some reason, I think we've

1808
01:22:36,200 --> 01:22:38,880
Speaker 1: gone into risk off. God, we don't even want the

1809
01:22:38,960 --> 01:22:41,720
Speaker 1: risk of asking somebody a question at a bar, you know,

1810
01:22:41,880 --> 01:22:45,280
Speaker 1: more or less starting a business and that's a problem.

1811
01:22:45,360 --> 01:22:48,120
Speaker 1: I mean, the SBA has fascinating data. Do you know

1812
01:22:48,520 --> 01:22:52,000
Speaker 1: there are more small businesses that close each year than

1813
01:22:52,080 --> 01:22:56,080
Speaker 1: open in the US, No way more close than open.

1814
01:22:56,520 --> 01:22:59,439
Speaker 1: And so we have people taking way less risk than

1815
01:22:59,479 --> 01:23:02,200
Speaker 1: we think, and that means you'll never make as much money.

1816
01:23:02,800 --> 01:23:03,360
Speaker 1: That crazy.

1817
01:23:03,600 --> 01:23:06,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's talk about that in terms of investing. If

1818
01:23:06,920 --> 01:23:09,559
Speaker 2: someone's thinking that, because they cut exactly what you're talking

1819
01:23:09,600 --> 01:23:13,280
Speaker 2: about right now, this risk reward profile. If someone has

1820
01:23:13,360 --> 01:23:18,800
Speaker 2: never invested in anything, they're working their job, they've got

1821
01:23:18,840 --> 01:23:20,599
Speaker 2: a little bit of money, maybe if they've got one

1822
01:23:20,680 --> 01:23:23,599
Speaker 2: thousand dollars to start thinking about investing. Maybe they've got

1823
01:23:23,640 --> 01:23:26,639
Speaker 2: a bit more. Maybe they've been saving up and they're

1824
01:23:26,640 --> 01:23:30,000
Speaker 2: thinking that home that they want to buy is a long, long, long,

1825
01:23:30,040 --> 01:23:32,200
Speaker 2: long long way away. But they've got a little bit.

1826
01:23:33,160 --> 01:23:33,880
Speaker 2: Where should they.

1827
01:23:33,760 --> 01:23:36,160
Speaker 1: Invest If you have only a little bit of cash.

1828
01:23:36,200 --> 01:23:38,479
Speaker 1: The best returning asset class of all time, it's going

1829
01:23:38,520 --> 01:23:42,040
Speaker 1: to be you put the money into you learning first

1830
01:23:42,479 --> 01:23:45,080
Speaker 1: before you go to invest. A lot of days, a

1831
01:23:45,080 --> 01:23:47,720
Speaker 1: lot of people these days will say, hey, it's Airbnb.

1832
01:23:47,880 --> 01:23:50,640
Speaker 1: Hey it's buying small businesses. Hey it's real estate. The

1833
01:23:50,680 --> 01:23:52,680
Speaker 1: highest performing asset class that you could ever have is

1834
01:23:52,680 --> 01:23:56,280
Speaker 1: you because you have unlimited upside and it compounds over time.

1835
01:23:56,720 --> 01:23:58,439
Speaker 1: And so if you don't have a lot of cash

1836
01:23:58,520 --> 01:24:00,840
Speaker 1: right now, bet on you first before you go back

1837
01:24:00,880 --> 01:24:04,360
Speaker 1: on somebody in the SMP. Now after that next amount.

1838
01:24:04,800 --> 01:24:07,160
Speaker 1: I believe because I'm old school, I started at Vanguard.

1839
01:24:07,439 --> 01:24:10,840
Speaker 1: I believe if you're reasonable, you'd probably agree with me. Like,

1840
01:24:10,960 --> 01:24:12,519
Speaker 1: do we think that we're going to beat the best

1841
01:24:12,560 --> 01:24:14,800
Speaker 1: stock pickers in the world who obsess on this every

1842
01:24:14,800 --> 01:24:17,000
Speaker 1: single day? Are we going to beat the titans of

1843
01:24:17,040 --> 01:24:20,439
Speaker 1: industry with their technology? No, So that's why I always

1844
01:24:20,439 --> 01:24:24,160
Speaker 1: go for low cost, low movement, so they don't trade

1845
01:24:24,200 --> 01:24:26,960
Speaker 1: a lot index funds. I worked at Vanguard. They have

1846
01:24:27,000 --> 01:24:29,840
Speaker 1: the best cost structure, so I throw things in the

1847
01:24:29,880 --> 01:24:32,320
Speaker 1: S and P five hundred in a diversified portfolio out

1848
01:24:32,320 --> 01:24:35,920
Speaker 1: of cost. To this week, you go to Vanguard dot com.

1849
01:24:36,439 --> 01:24:39,519
Speaker 1: You have no fees on their trading platform. In my opinion,

1850
01:24:39,600 --> 01:24:44,240
Speaker 1: avoid Robinhood, avoid anything where you're buying individual stocks when

1851
01:24:44,280 --> 01:24:47,040
Speaker 1: you don't know, unless you're doing it purely for learning

1852
01:24:47,320 --> 01:24:50,880
Speaker 1: and you're okay with losing everything. And you go to

1853
01:24:51,000 --> 01:24:54,519
Speaker 1: Vanguard dot Com and you select a diversified portfolio It's

1854
01:24:54,560 --> 01:24:57,280
Speaker 1: cool too because they'll actually help you do it based

1855
01:24:57,320 --> 01:24:59,560
Speaker 1: on your age and based on how much risk you

1856
01:24:59,600 --> 01:25:02,240
Speaker 1: want to take. So they'll have a sixty forty portfolio,

1857
01:25:02,280 --> 01:25:04,799
Speaker 1: which is like sixty percent stocks and forty percent bonds

1858
01:25:04,960 --> 01:25:07,719
Speaker 1: if you're our age, for instance, if somebody's a little younger,

1859
01:25:07,760 --> 01:25:10,080
Speaker 1: they'll go eighty twenty because you should take more risk

1860
01:25:10,200 --> 01:25:12,559
Speaker 1: with stocks when you're young. So you can literally in

1861
01:25:12,600 --> 01:25:15,400
Speaker 1: one click get a diversified portfolio, and then you can

1862
01:25:15,400 --> 01:25:16,880
Speaker 1: add to it. You could also use like a wealth

1863
01:25:16,880 --> 01:25:17,439
Speaker 1: front for that.

1864
01:25:17,479 --> 01:25:20,120
Speaker 2: What's the divis portfolio For someone who doesn't.

1865
01:25:19,880 --> 01:25:22,000
Speaker 1: Know, that means that you never want to have all

1866
01:25:22,000 --> 01:25:23,840
Speaker 1: your eggs in one basket and anything in life, but

1867
01:25:23,920 --> 01:25:26,439
Speaker 1: certainly in investing, and so that means that they're going

1868
01:25:26,479 --> 01:25:28,720
Speaker 1: to give you stocks and bonds. It means they're going

1869
01:25:28,760 --> 01:25:31,840
Speaker 1: to give you emerging markets versus the US. So let's

1870
01:25:31,840 --> 01:25:36,200
Speaker 1: say India, China, Russia, Brazil and the US stock market.

1871
01:25:36,400 --> 01:25:39,400
Speaker 1: And it means that typically over time. You know that

1872
01:25:39,479 --> 01:25:41,400
Speaker 1: there's these charts you can see in finance where it

1873
01:25:41,439 --> 01:25:44,080
Speaker 1: kind of looks like it looks like a grid and

1874
01:25:44,200 --> 01:25:46,320
Speaker 1: audit are all of these different colors, and what do

1875
01:25:46,400 --> 01:25:48,960
Speaker 1: all the coverers represent that have no pattern to it.

1876
01:25:49,000 --> 01:25:52,160
Speaker 1: Every single year looks different. They represent every asset class

1877
01:25:52,160 --> 01:25:55,520
Speaker 1: you could invest in, from bonds to stocks, to Chilean

1878
01:25:55,800 --> 01:25:59,559
Speaker 1: stocks to short term money markets. And what you see

1879
01:25:59,600 --> 01:26:03,400
Speaker 1: over time is in every single market, everything moves. And

1880
01:26:03,479 --> 01:26:05,439
Speaker 1: so what you want to have is a portfolio that

1881
01:26:05,520 --> 01:26:08,679
Speaker 1: over time averages somewhere around ten percent. That's the average

1882
01:26:08,720 --> 01:26:12,120
Speaker 1: cost of inflation. How your money really if you don't

1883
01:26:12,160 --> 01:26:14,479
Speaker 1: invest it. Every single year that you don't invest, you

1884
01:26:14,560 --> 01:26:17,240
Speaker 1: lose money. Say you took a one hundred dollars bill

1885
01:26:17,280 --> 01:26:18,600
Speaker 1: right here, and I had it right in front of me,

1886
01:26:19,120 --> 01:26:20,960
Speaker 1: and I looked at that bill since the beginning of

1887
01:26:21,000 --> 01:26:24,480
Speaker 1: the Federal Reserve, which is the government institute that mandates

1888
01:26:24,560 --> 01:26:26,960
Speaker 1: or manages all of our currency in the US. So

1889
01:26:26,960 --> 01:26:28,479
Speaker 1: if I go all the way back to the seventies

1890
01:26:29,479 --> 01:26:31,719
Speaker 1: and I look at it today, what do I see?

1891
01:26:31,840 --> 01:26:33,680
Speaker 1: I see that one hundred dollars bill, if I just

1892
01:26:33,760 --> 01:26:36,439
Speaker 1: held it from then to now, is worth about twenty

1893
01:26:36,439 --> 01:26:39,920
Speaker 1: five bucks. It's not worth one hundred anymore. Why because

1894
01:26:39,920 --> 01:26:42,920
Speaker 1: of inflation. And so if we don't invest our money

1895
01:26:42,960 --> 01:26:45,559
Speaker 1: and we stick it under our mattress, then sadly the

1896
01:26:45,560 --> 01:26:48,080
Speaker 1: government eats away at it every single year, both sides

1897
01:26:48,160 --> 01:26:50,880
Speaker 1: politically agnostic, and so we got to make sure that

1898
01:26:50,880 --> 01:26:53,240
Speaker 1: we put our money somewhere. That's why the stock market

1899
01:26:53,240 --> 01:26:55,320
Speaker 1: over time is usually what most people do.

1900
01:26:55,640 --> 01:26:57,200
Speaker 2: Okay, it makes a lot of sense. And what's the

1901
01:26:57,200 --> 01:26:58,719
Speaker 2: difference between a stock and a bond?

1902
01:26:58,840 --> 01:27:01,439
Speaker 1: Okay, so stocks and bonds one oh one. I think

1903
01:27:01,439 --> 01:27:04,960
Speaker 1: about stocks like a ability for you to have future

1904
01:27:05,080 --> 01:27:08,160
Speaker 1: upside of a company. So you are betting in a

1905
01:27:08,200 --> 01:27:10,920
Speaker 1: way on a company. You're saying, today the price of

1906
01:27:10,960 --> 01:27:13,760
Speaker 1: Amazon is ten dollars. I think in the future the

1907
01:27:13,800 --> 01:27:16,280
Speaker 1: price of Amazon will be fifteen dollars. I want to

1908
01:27:16,320 --> 01:27:20,040
Speaker 1: go for that ride. It's called upside return with a bond.

1909
01:27:20,200 --> 01:27:23,000
Speaker 1: What are you doing instead? You're saying, I actually want income.

1910
01:27:23,320 --> 01:27:25,840
Speaker 1: It's like a certificate. If I give you one hundred bucks,

1911
01:27:26,040 --> 01:27:28,720
Speaker 1: I promise you over the next five years, I'm going

1912
01:27:28,760 --> 01:27:31,080
Speaker 1: to give you one hundred and twenty back. You're not

1913
01:27:31,120 --> 01:27:34,000
Speaker 1: going to make more if the bond that you invest

1914
01:27:34,000 --> 01:27:36,360
Speaker 1: in goes up or down in price. You're just going

1915
01:27:36,400 --> 01:27:39,200
Speaker 1: to clip coupons is what they're called. It used to

1916
01:27:39,200 --> 01:27:42,960
Speaker 1: be like that, So you're clipping the coupon. And the

1917
01:27:43,000 --> 01:27:45,680
Speaker 1: reason we want both of those is because again, you

1918
01:27:45,720 --> 01:27:48,960
Speaker 1: want when the stock market crashes, you want your bond

1919
01:27:48,960 --> 01:27:51,439
Speaker 1: to still be clipping those coupons, baby still coming in

1920
01:27:51,720 --> 01:27:54,479
Speaker 1: when the stock market's raging, you want to capture some

1921
01:27:54,520 --> 01:27:56,719
Speaker 1: of that upside. And that's how we play right there

1922
01:27:56,760 --> 01:27:57,920
Speaker 1: in the middle of investing.

1923
01:27:58,200 --> 01:27:59,880
Speaker 2: Is there a stage three? So we did stage one

1924
01:28:00,040 --> 01:28:03,960
Speaker 2: as you Stage two is SMP. What's the stage three?

1925
01:28:04,040 --> 01:28:07,639
Speaker 1: Stage three is private? So if you're a real pro

1926
01:28:07,680 --> 01:28:09,439
Speaker 1: and you want to go for three h three of investing,

1927
01:28:09,560 --> 01:28:12,920
Speaker 1: that's where we start to do private equity. That's just

1928
01:28:13,080 --> 01:28:15,880
Speaker 1: investing in those same companies, but instead of them being

1929
01:28:15,920 --> 01:28:19,400
Speaker 1: traded publicly, those companies are now held by private investors.

1930
01:28:19,439 --> 01:28:22,519
Speaker 1: They'll never trade on a stock exchange. That also includes

1931
01:28:22,600 --> 01:28:26,000
Speaker 1: things like you can have alternative investments that might be

1932
01:28:26,080 --> 01:28:29,520
Speaker 1: in investing in direct in real estate or investing in commodities,

1933
01:28:29,520 --> 01:28:32,080
Speaker 1: which would be like timber. Right, you could bet on

1934
01:28:32,120 --> 01:28:35,640
Speaker 1: timber prices that might be like equity and options. I

1935
01:28:35,640 --> 01:28:39,080
Speaker 1: think this generation got a little crazy because they were

1936
01:28:39,080 --> 01:28:43,640
Speaker 1: the first generation to gamify stock market investing and make

1937
01:28:43,680 --> 01:28:46,519
Speaker 1: it seem fun as opposed to serious. And they were

1938
01:28:46,560 --> 01:28:49,519
Speaker 1: the first generation that got easy access to things like

1939
01:28:49,680 --> 01:28:54,160
Speaker 1: options and warrants, and that's really actually only for pros.

1940
01:28:54,360 --> 01:28:56,040
Speaker 1: So I think anybody who's trying to tell you how

1941
01:28:56,080 --> 01:28:58,320
Speaker 1: to day trade, anybody who's trying to tell you how

1942
01:28:58,320 --> 01:29:01,519
Speaker 1: to do options, that's strategy. You think about that like

1943
01:29:01,720 --> 01:29:03,559
Speaker 1: somebody trying to tell you, let me teach you, over

1944
01:29:03,640 --> 01:29:06,240
Speaker 1: the course of a couple hours of me speaking to you,

1945
01:29:06,520 --> 01:29:09,599
Speaker 1: how to cut open somebody's brain. We just wouldn't do that.

1946
01:29:10,000 --> 01:29:12,519
Speaker 1: This is for pros. And if you really want to

1947
01:29:12,520 --> 01:29:14,719
Speaker 1: make real money, you don't do it by messing around

1948
01:29:14,720 --> 01:29:17,479
Speaker 1: at the margins of financial investing. In my mind, you

1949
01:29:17,560 --> 01:29:19,720
Speaker 1: do it by becoming the company that they invest in,

1950
01:29:19,760 --> 01:29:22,120
Speaker 1: which is stage four. So that's when you're like, I

1951
01:29:22,240 --> 01:29:25,280
Speaker 1: buy the business outright, I raise money for my own business,

1952
01:29:25,680 --> 01:29:27,559
Speaker 1: and that's the next level of the game.

1953
01:29:27,720 --> 01:29:30,360
Speaker 2: That's so great. I love that step by step because

1954
01:29:30,360 --> 01:29:32,800
Speaker 2: I feel for so many people it just feels like

1955
01:29:32,880 --> 01:29:37,559
Speaker 2: this unorganized, messy, wild wild West. And now it's like,

1956
01:29:37,560 --> 01:29:40,240
Speaker 2: wait a minute, stage one, stage two, stage stage four.

1957
01:29:40,280 --> 01:29:42,360
Speaker 2: I love those. Going back to stage two of the

1958
01:29:42,439 --> 01:29:46,559
Speaker 2: S and P. What percentage of someone's income should they

1959
01:29:46,560 --> 01:29:49,320
Speaker 2: be looking to put into the S and P.

1960
01:29:49,600 --> 01:29:51,559
Speaker 1: There's lots of rules around this, but I believe in

1961
01:29:51,680 --> 01:29:54,960
Speaker 1: you pay yourself first, and you pay yourself first. What

1962
01:29:55,040 --> 01:29:58,360
Speaker 1: I mean is you think about your investments just like

1963
01:29:58,439 --> 01:30:01,840
Speaker 1: you would a need, not a lot, so every single month.

1964
01:30:01,880 --> 01:30:04,679
Speaker 1: I believe in automatic investing. I've done it my entire career.

1965
01:30:04,840 --> 01:30:07,200
Speaker 1: Vanguard taught me that you get really lucky in finance.

1966
01:30:07,360 --> 01:30:09,400
Speaker 1: They teach you how to invest so that it becomes

1967
01:30:09,400 --> 01:30:12,599
Speaker 1: a habit, not a possibility. You don't wake up unless

1968
01:30:12,600 --> 01:30:14,800
Speaker 1: you're gross and not brush your teeth, right, You just

1969
01:30:14,800 --> 01:30:17,679
Speaker 1: brush your teeth because you're not gross, And so for investing,

1970
01:30:17,720 --> 01:30:19,519
Speaker 1: I think about it the same way. It's like you

1971
01:30:19,560 --> 01:30:22,320
Speaker 1: automatically set up your payments, so a little bit goes

1972
01:30:22,360 --> 01:30:25,000
Speaker 1: every time. I believe you want to have at least

1973
01:30:25,080 --> 01:30:27,719
Speaker 1: ten percent of the money that you make go into investing.

1974
01:30:27,760 --> 01:30:30,080
Speaker 1: There's lots of different rules. People could play it either way,

1975
01:30:30,080 --> 01:30:32,800
Speaker 1: but I think pay yourself first because otherwise you'll never

1976
01:30:32,800 --> 01:30:35,280
Speaker 1: pay yourself at all. And give yourself at least ten

1977
01:30:35,320 --> 01:30:37,840
Speaker 1: percent because we want to beat inflation every single year.

1978
01:30:37,960 --> 01:30:39,960
Speaker 1: And if you do those two things, you are better

1979
01:30:40,040 --> 01:30:42,320
Speaker 1: than about ninety percent of people that don't.

1980
01:30:42,080 --> 01:30:44,840
Speaker 2: Do that ten percent off the tax. That's just such

1981
01:30:44,840 --> 01:30:46,920
Speaker 2: a great goal for people, and you start thinking about

1982
01:30:46,920 --> 01:30:49,840
Speaker 2: it and you go, oh, what am I spending dumb

1983
01:30:49,840 --> 01:30:52,400
Speaker 2: money on? You know, like, what do you see people

1984
01:30:52,479 --> 01:30:53,439
Speaker 2: wasting money on? You know what?

1985
01:30:53,479 --> 01:30:56,040
Speaker 1: The biggest thing is people waste money on looking rich

1986
01:30:56,120 --> 01:30:59,400
Speaker 1: instead of being rich. And that is a cultural phenomenon

1987
01:30:59,520 --> 01:31:03,280
Speaker 1: that I think is eroding our wealth of society. I mean,

1988
01:31:03,360 --> 01:31:07,760
Speaker 1: perfect example here Coachella. We know because we're on the

1989
01:31:07,760 --> 01:31:10,360
Speaker 1: inside that the dirty secret of Coachella and everybody that

1990
01:31:10,439 --> 01:31:12,720
Speaker 1: you see on there is that most influencers are one

1991
01:31:12,960 --> 01:31:16,160
Speaker 1: paid to go, two given free tickets, three flown out

1992
01:31:16,160 --> 01:31:18,559
Speaker 1: for free. Four They actually have warehouses where you can

1993
01:31:18,600 --> 01:31:21,000
Speaker 1: pick out the clothes because that part's expensive, and you

1994
01:31:21,000 --> 01:31:23,200
Speaker 1: get the clothes for free, or if you're a real pro,

1995
01:31:23,280 --> 01:31:25,280
Speaker 1: they'll pay you to wear the clothes and give you

1996
01:31:25,360 --> 01:31:28,880
Speaker 1: the clothes for free. And so this entire experience for

1997
01:31:29,000 --> 01:31:31,960
Speaker 1: the few who become because we're all we just desire

1998
01:31:32,000 --> 01:31:34,640
Speaker 1: what other people have. That's how humans are. They're not

1999
01:31:34,680 --> 01:31:36,920
Speaker 1: paying anything for a thing that costs thousands and thousands

2000
01:31:36,960 --> 01:31:39,599
Speaker 1: and thousands of thousands of dollars. Well, the problem is

2001
01:31:39,600 --> 01:31:43,360
Speaker 1: is that the average Coachella main ticket holder, about sixty

2002
01:31:43,360 --> 01:31:45,840
Speaker 1: four percent of them couldn't afford their ticket, so they

2003
01:31:45,840 --> 01:31:48,880
Speaker 1: had to do buy now, pay later options. This year

2004
01:31:49,600 --> 01:31:52,280
Speaker 1: they offered buy now, pay later. And that is just

2005
01:31:52,320 --> 01:31:54,559
Speaker 1: for the ticket. That's not for the clothes, and that's

2006
01:31:54,600 --> 01:31:56,679
Speaker 1: not for the food, and that's not for the drinks.

2007
01:31:57,040 --> 01:32:01,080
Speaker 1: And so we are basically having credit card debt with

2008
01:32:01,200 --> 01:32:04,439
Speaker 1: which lasts forever, as a trade for Instagram posts which

2009
01:32:04,520 --> 01:32:07,840
Speaker 1: last for a minute. And so the number one thing

2010
01:32:07,880 --> 01:32:09,960
Speaker 1: that you can do to change your financial future is

2011
01:32:10,000 --> 01:32:12,400
Speaker 1: to not buy into what you see on the internet

2012
01:32:12,479 --> 01:32:14,920
Speaker 1: everybody else doing, which is why I really respect what

2013
01:32:15,000 --> 01:32:17,280
Speaker 1: you do and I try to do it online too.

2014
01:32:17,520 --> 01:32:19,800
Speaker 1: Sure we have nice things now sometimes you'll catch it

2015
01:32:19,840 --> 01:32:21,880
Speaker 1: in places because I won't really tell. But you don't

2016
01:32:21,920 --> 01:32:25,120
Speaker 1: see me flashing nice watches. You don't see me having

2017
01:32:25,200 --> 01:32:28,240
Speaker 1: nice cars. You don't see me posting about private planes.

2018
01:32:28,479 --> 01:32:31,799
Speaker 1: Why that's not really necessary. And all you are signaling

2019
01:32:31,960 --> 01:32:34,120
Speaker 1: is that that is what success is. That is not

2020
01:32:34,200 --> 01:32:37,080
Speaker 1: a success is. Those are just accoutrements that could be

2021
01:32:37,080 --> 01:32:40,240
Speaker 1: fun if you're into it once you're rich. But I

2022
01:32:40,240 --> 01:32:43,559
Speaker 1: promise you I've met so many unhappy mothers who have

2023
01:32:43,600 --> 01:32:44,240
Speaker 1: private jets.

2024
01:32:44,400 --> 01:32:46,559
Speaker 2: Yeah no, And I really appreciate that you saying that

2025
01:32:46,640 --> 01:32:48,400
Speaker 2: because I think for me it was the same thing

2026
01:32:48,439 --> 01:32:50,679
Speaker 2: I never wanted. I mean, when I started, I didn't

2027
01:32:50,680 --> 01:32:52,960
Speaker 2: have anything to show, but I didn't want someone to

2028
01:32:53,000 --> 01:32:55,400
Speaker 2: follow me for what I had. I wanted them to

2029
01:32:55,439 --> 01:32:58,400
Speaker 2: follow me for what I was saying and doing and living.

2030
01:32:58,479 --> 01:33:02,120
Speaker 2: And that to me always felt like that means anyone

2031
01:33:02,160 --> 01:33:04,080
Speaker 2: could do it, and as soon as it became. And

2032
01:33:04,160 --> 01:33:06,320
Speaker 2: also it was never about getting the thing, even for me.

2033
01:33:07,040 --> 01:33:09,360
Speaker 2: So if you make it about getting the thing, then

2034
01:33:09,400 --> 01:33:11,400
Speaker 2: the thing you do to get it you don't love.

2035
01:33:11,680 --> 01:33:13,400
Speaker 2: Whereas my thing is I love the game. I love

2036
01:33:13,439 --> 01:33:15,280
Speaker 2: what I'm doing, and same as you. And it goes

2037
01:33:15,320 --> 01:33:17,160
Speaker 2: back to where we started, where it's like, if you

2038
01:33:17,200 --> 01:33:19,400
Speaker 2: love the game, if you respect the rules, if you

2039
01:33:19,439 --> 01:33:21,720
Speaker 2: love what you do, then all of these things are

2040
01:33:21,720 --> 01:33:24,720
Speaker 2: a byproduct. They're wonderful, but they're never the gold and

2041
01:33:24,800 --> 01:33:27,799
Speaker 2: never the destination. They're never the thing that you wanted.

2042
01:33:27,840 --> 01:33:29,320
Speaker 2: That's not what drove you there.

2043
01:33:29,920 --> 01:33:32,240
Speaker 1: It's so true, and I'll be taken from you at

2044
01:33:32,320 --> 01:33:35,200
Speaker 1: very points, you know. And so I think about it

2045
01:33:35,240 --> 01:33:37,599
Speaker 1: a little bit like beauty. You know, I'm getting older

2046
01:33:37,840 --> 01:33:40,840
Speaker 1: and I've tried on the internet. Never make it about

2047
01:33:40,880 --> 01:33:42,400
Speaker 1: how I look one way or the other, if I'm

2048
01:33:42,439 --> 01:33:45,599
Speaker 1: fit or not, if I'm in sexy outfits or not.

2049
01:33:45,720 --> 01:33:47,200
Speaker 1: Why because I'm going to get old. I know what

2050
01:33:47,200 --> 01:33:49,240
Speaker 1: the future looks like, and it's old and wrinkley and

2051
01:33:49,360 --> 01:33:52,120
Speaker 1: sagotits and all the things right, and that's cool. It

2052
01:33:52,120 --> 01:33:54,639
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. And so if I can like prepare now

2053
01:33:54,680 --> 01:33:57,200
Speaker 1: that maybe people listen because I might have something valuable

2054
01:33:57,240 --> 01:33:59,479
Speaker 1: to say, then I'll still have something valuable to say

2055
01:33:59,479 --> 01:34:01,200
Speaker 1: when I'm made, as long as I'm still with it.

2056
01:34:01,600 --> 01:34:03,920
Speaker 1: And I think it's the same with stuff. You know,

2057
01:34:04,000 --> 01:34:06,840
Speaker 1: somebody could take that from you, but they cannot take ever.

2058
01:34:07,479 --> 01:34:09,559
Speaker 1: Nobody but God can take all the lessons that you've

2059
01:34:09,640 --> 01:34:13,160
Speaker 1: learned while running this business. Nobody but God could take

2060
01:34:13,320 --> 01:34:17,439
Speaker 1: the relationships that you've built from this business. But many things,

2061
01:34:17,520 --> 01:34:20,559
Speaker 1: including the market, could take everything that sits around us.

2062
01:34:21,240 --> 01:34:22,840
Speaker 1: And so I try to remember that so that I

2063
01:34:22,880 --> 01:34:24,479
Speaker 1: never anchored to it. And don't get me wrong, I'm

2064
01:34:24,520 --> 01:34:26,400
Speaker 1: not like, I am not an actual monk. I am

2065
01:34:26,520 --> 01:34:29,960
Speaker 1: very flawed, and so you know, I wish that I

2066
01:34:30,000 --> 01:34:32,360
Speaker 1: was better at some of this, But it is like

2067
01:34:32,479 --> 01:34:34,880
Speaker 1: the habits of millionaires are that they actually buy and

2068
01:34:35,000 --> 01:34:38,360
Speaker 1: large they don't care about money. They care about winning,

2069
01:34:38,439 --> 01:34:42,960
Speaker 1: and they care about learning, and real players find things

2070
01:34:43,000 --> 01:34:45,360
Speaker 1: and money to be uninteresting at some point.

2071
01:34:45,880 --> 01:34:50,320
Speaker 2: Toty cents, you're amazing. This is so great with you

2072
01:34:50,360 --> 01:34:53,240
Speaker 2: because it's just it's refreshing. We talked about everything from

2073
01:34:53,320 --> 01:34:57,479
Speaker 2: dating to investing, to making money to being a good employee.

2074
01:34:57,520 --> 01:35:00,400
Speaker 2: And I love that you're so flexible to go anywhere everywhere,

2075
01:35:00,439 --> 01:35:03,000
Speaker 2: because I feel people are going to get so much

2076
01:35:03,040 --> 01:35:06,320
Speaker 2: out of this episode, and I'm just so grateful that

2077
01:35:06,640 --> 01:35:10,479
Speaker 2: you're showing up as you are always despite everything else

2078
01:35:10,560 --> 01:35:12,800
Speaker 2: crazy life that you have going on as well, you're

2079
01:35:12,840 --> 01:35:16,160
Speaker 2: able to come here and drop wisdom gems with ease.

2080
01:35:16,760 --> 01:35:19,400
Speaker 2: Thank you for the priceless advice. It was so fun,

2081
01:35:19,400 --> 01:35:22,200
Speaker 2: amazing value. Everyone who's listening and watching, make sure you

2082
01:35:22,280 --> 01:35:25,760
Speaker 2: tag me and Cody on Instagram, on TikTok. Let us

2083
01:35:25,800 --> 01:35:28,800
Speaker 2: know what you're testing, let us know what resonated with you,

2084
01:35:28,880 --> 01:35:30,840
Speaker 2: let us know what connected with you. Because there were

2085
01:35:30,920 --> 01:35:33,720
Speaker 2: so many moments that I was sitting there going this

2086
01:35:33,800 --> 01:35:35,720
Speaker 2: is great, this is great. I hope someone does this.

2087
01:35:36,080 --> 01:35:38,639
Speaker 2: I want to see what's stuck with you. And of course,

2088
01:35:38,680 --> 01:35:41,280
Speaker 2: if you don't already, go and grab a copy of

2089
01:35:41,400 --> 01:35:45,160
Speaker 2: main Street Millionaire. Subscribe to Cody's podcast, follow her across

2090
01:35:45,160 --> 01:35:48,080
Speaker 2: social media, don't miss out in the amazing wisdom that

2091
01:35:48,120 --> 01:35:50,080
Speaker 2: she has to share, and we'll see you again soon.

2092
01:35:50,280 --> 01:35:53,760
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening to this conversation. If

2093
01:35:53,760 --> 01:35:57,160
Speaker 2: you enjoyed it, you'll love my chat with Adam Grant

2094
01:35:57,439 --> 01:36:00,479
Speaker 2: on why discomfort is the key to growth and the

2095
01:36:00,560 --> 01:36:04,680
Speaker 2: strategies for unlocking your hidden potential. If you know you

2096
01:36:04,720 --> 01:36:07,320
Speaker 2: want to be more and achieve more this year, go

2097
01:36:07,439 --> 01:36:08,799
Speaker 2: check it out right now.

2098
01:36:08,960 --> 01:36:11,639
Speaker 1: You set a goal today, you achieve it in six months,

2099
01:36:12,040 --> 01:36:14,839
Speaker 1: and then by the time it happens, it's almost a relief.

2100
01:36:15,080 --> 01:36:16,639
Speaker 2: There's no sense of meaning and purpose.

2101
01:36:16,800 --> 01:36:18,519
Speaker 1: You sort of expected it, and you would have been

2102
01:36:18,520 --> 01:36:19,960
Speaker 1: disappointed if it didn't happen.