WEBVTT - Do You Need a Break from Social Media? 0:00:03.880 --> 0:00:08.160 I felt like social media put this unnecessary stress and 0:00:08.200 --> 0:00:11.880 pressure on me, so I took a break and it 0:00:12.000 --> 0:00:15.960 helped so much. Sadly, now, more than ever, you guys, 0:00:16.480 --> 0:00:20.120 the more skin you show, the more likes and views 0:00:20.160 --> 0:00:23.279 you get. Then you share something positive and it doesn't 0:00:23.320 --> 0:00:25.479 get as many views and as many likes. If you 0:00:25.520 --> 0:00:28.720 feel anxiety, or you feel anything any type of negative 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:32.960 way when you go on social media, just know of 0:00:33.040 --> 0:00:34.800 the things that you see on Instagram are not real. 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:41.319 What Up? What Up? Happy Monday? Thank you so much 0:00:41.360 --> 0:00:44.560 for listening into this episode of chick Ease and Chill. 0:00:44.920 --> 0:00:46.839 I'm your host, Cheeks, and today We're going to be 0:00:46.880 --> 0:00:50.480 talking about something we all use just about every day, 0:00:50.880 --> 0:00:54.440 social media. We spend hours and hours online and sometimes 0:00:54.640 --> 0:00:56.960 we need a break. So today I'm going to be 0:00:57.000 --> 0:00:59.840 talking about how and when I do that. So stay 0:00:59.880 --> 0:01:08.080 to own. This is cheek Ease and Chill. Whether you're 0:01:08.080 --> 0:01:12.680 on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok, these platforms consume so 0:01:12.920 --> 0:01:15.640 much of your day, and I think now more than ever, 0:01:15.920 --> 0:01:19.400 you guys, I have been a victim of it, especially TikTok. 0:01:19.440 --> 0:01:22.959 TikTok takes a long long time. It takes a lot 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:26.040 of energy, a lot of mental space, and obviously during 0:01:26.040 --> 0:01:28.160 the pandemic, like a lot of people, I was doing 0:01:28.160 --> 0:01:29.480 a lot of TikTok because I had a lot of 0:01:29.520 --> 0:01:31.240 time and I had a lot of fun doing it. 0:01:31.319 --> 0:01:33.200 And I love going on TikTok, especially when I want 0:01:33.240 --> 0:01:34.679 to laugh and I want to like look up the 0:01:34.720 --> 0:01:37.480 recipe and everything. But I've kind of stayed away from 0:01:37.520 --> 0:01:40.920 TikTok for a little bit. I haven't posted a lot 0:01:41.480 --> 0:01:44.320 because I'm busy with other things. I had to finish 0:01:44.400 --> 0:01:47.960 my album and the tour and everything. So talking about 0:01:47.960 --> 0:01:52.560 breaks in, I took a big break. I don't know. 0:01:52.600 --> 0:01:55.080 It must have been like almost three months. It was 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:59.800 right before my second album and what has dropped. I 0:01:59.840 --> 0:02:01.880 was going through a lot, a lot of changes. I 0:02:01.920 --> 0:02:04.480 had just moved into my new home. UM, I was 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:07.040 on tour a lot during that time, and I just 0:02:07.120 --> 0:02:11.239 felt like I was drinking too much, like drinking alcohol 0:02:11.600 --> 0:02:14.919 to like numb myself what it is that I was spelling. 0:02:14.960 --> 0:02:16.839 I was missing my mom. It was just a lot, 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:21.640 and I felt like social media put this unnecessary stress 0:02:21.639 --> 0:02:24.640 and pressure on me. So I took a break and 0:02:25.400 --> 0:02:28.720 it helped so much. I was able to just focus 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:34.480 and zone in on finishing my album, on cleansing myself, 0:02:34.880 --> 0:02:38.079 not drinking, focusing on my house because I had just 0:02:38.120 --> 0:02:40.200 bought the house and I wanted to make changes and 0:02:40.240 --> 0:02:42.359 I wanted to furnish it. So it just really helped me. 0:02:42.880 --> 0:02:46.000 During that time is when Omi and I had our 0:02:46.320 --> 0:02:49.000 you know, break as well, and I had lost a 0:02:49.000 --> 0:02:51.160 few friends during that time, so I just really needed 0:02:51.160 --> 0:02:53.680 the time to do it. And I felt like social media, 0:02:53.720 --> 0:02:56.200 which is kind of sometimes bring me sadness. And I've 0:02:56.200 --> 0:02:59.760 spoken to a few people and there are studies that 0:03:00.480 --> 0:03:05.480 say that social media can bring you anxiety and depression 0:03:06.320 --> 0:03:10.240 because you're scrolling and you're looking at these people's lives. 0:03:10.320 --> 0:03:12.480 You know, a lot of them, a lot of influencers. 0:03:12.520 --> 0:03:17.200 They get paid to go on vacation to post certain 0:03:17.280 --> 0:03:19.959 clothing and certain bags, and they rent a lot of 0:03:20.000 --> 0:03:21.640 these things, and a lot of these cars and homes 0:03:21.639 --> 0:03:23.560 and yachts that you see on social media. They're all 0:03:23.600 --> 0:03:26.639 a facade. Not all, most of them are a facade. 0:03:27.360 --> 0:03:29.560 And it's just a bunch of people. And I'm not 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:32.320 saying everyone, but there's a good chunk of people that 0:03:33.240 --> 0:03:38.480 just pretend to have these lavish lives and us the 0:03:38.480 --> 0:03:41.760 people that are watching sometimes and even like perfect relationships. 0:03:41.760 --> 0:03:43.720 And I want to say that I was probably one 0:03:43.760 --> 0:03:47.480 of those people that I posted my relationship so much before, 0:03:47.680 --> 0:03:49.800 and I knew what I was going through and what 0:03:49.880 --> 0:03:52.760 I was feeling, but I felt like, well, I have 0:03:52.880 --> 0:03:55.440 to share this because this is my partner, this is 0:03:55.480 --> 0:03:57.680 my husband, and I have to share this part of 0:03:57.680 --> 0:04:00.960 my life. And people are like, oh, I want that. 0:04:01.120 --> 0:04:03.240 I want what they have, you know, and it creates 0:04:03.280 --> 0:04:06.440 like subconsciously like anxiety, and they're just like, why don't 0:04:06.440 --> 0:04:08.640 I have what they have? Why does that person look 0:04:08.720 --> 0:04:10.400 like that? Why don't I look like that person? And 0:04:10.640 --> 0:04:12.200 I wish I had that car, and I want that 0:04:12.240 --> 0:04:14.080 house and I want to dress like her, And it's 0:04:14.120 --> 0:04:17.600 just constantly in the back of your mind, like you 0:04:17.640 --> 0:04:20.920 just start thinking all these things. So that's why I 0:04:20.960 --> 0:04:24.680 from time to time internally and in my life and 0:04:24.760 --> 0:04:28.360 my personal life, I take breaks. Sometimes I take just 0:04:28.440 --> 0:04:31.000 the weekend and I won't post anything. The people that 0:04:31.040 --> 0:04:33.000 follow me know that, you guys know that I will 0:04:33.000 --> 0:04:35.960 tell you guys, Hey, I wasn't feeling good. I needed 0:04:36.000 --> 0:04:40.000 to stay away. I needed to regroup. I needed tomente, 0:04:40.120 --> 0:04:43.440 you know, which means just really just be with myself. 0:04:44.080 --> 0:04:47.720 I love social media because I get to express and 0:04:47.760 --> 0:04:49.839 share things with you guys on a different level. And 0:04:49.880 --> 0:04:52.760 I have that direct contact with my followers. And I 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:55.479 love speaking to you guys, and I have my dams open, 0:04:55.600 --> 0:04:57.719 and you know what I mean, Like, I love hearing 0:04:57.760 --> 0:04:59.960 from you guys. But sometimes it could be a very 0:05:00.040 --> 0:05:03.000 toxic place, you guys, social media could be toxic. It 0:05:03.080 --> 0:05:06.960 all depends on what you follow, who you follow. For me, 0:05:07.360 --> 0:05:10.599 I follow about three thousand nineteen people I just checked. 0:05:11.000 --> 0:05:12.960 Some people think that that's too much. I should like 0:05:13.120 --> 0:05:15.320 follow less, but I follow a lot of my boss piece, 0:05:15.720 --> 0:05:18.839 a lot of people that send me love, and a 0:05:18.880 --> 0:05:21.400 lot of my fan pages. So I'm super grateful for 0:05:21.400 --> 0:05:23.279 that that. I think that's the majority of people that 0:05:23.320 --> 0:05:26.120 I follow. I also follow a lot of accounts of 0:05:26.160 --> 0:05:28.240 positive quotes. I love quotes, you guys know. I like 0:05:28.320 --> 0:05:29.640 to write them, I like to read them, I like 0:05:29.680 --> 0:05:35.159 to share them. I follow business pages, entrepreneur pages, like 0:05:35.200 --> 0:05:39.480 a lot of women quotes. I follow some preachers. For me, 0:05:39.520 --> 0:05:41.559 it's like, that's why it's important that people that you follow, 0:05:41.600 --> 0:05:44.520 that they feed your soul, that they feed you something good. 0:05:45.040 --> 0:05:47.279 There are some people that I follow that I don't 0:05:47.320 --> 0:05:49.040 follow because they've never done anything bad to me, but 0:05:49.080 --> 0:05:50.920 I mute them. I'm not gonna lie. There are some 0:05:50.960 --> 0:05:53.279 people that are mute because sometimes it's just like, oh, 0:05:53.360 --> 0:05:56.600 girl or boy, I just can't you know, and I 0:05:56.640 --> 0:05:58.359 don't want to follow you because you haven't done anything 0:05:58.360 --> 0:06:00.120 mean to me. Like it's not that I don't like you, 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:01.880 it's just sometimes your energy is just too much for me, 0:06:01.920 --> 0:06:04.040 so I mute them. That's good to you, guys. A 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:06.960 muting and muting and sometimes blocking. I block a lot 0:06:07.000 --> 0:06:09.520 of like haters because I'm like, you're not gonna come 0:06:09.600 --> 0:06:13.520 and try to like contaminate my space with your negativity, 0:06:13.560 --> 0:06:17.159 so I'll block those motherfucker's And yeah, I unfollow people 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:19.640 if I need to, like for sure, when I'm like, 0:06:19.720 --> 0:06:21.240 I really don't care and I need you to know 0:06:21.279 --> 0:06:24.920 that you're not on my Good Girl list of this 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:28.359 year her good boy list, and I'll unfollow just to 0:06:28.440 --> 0:06:30.960 let it be known. I think it is important. I 0:06:31.000 --> 0:06:34.200 think it's definitely important to be mindful of the accounts 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:36.479 that we follow, and that's why I do my best. 0:06:36.600 --> 0:06:38.960 I'm a little crazy sometimes on Instagram. You guys like, yes, 0:06:38.960 --> 0:06:41.200 I show my booty here and there. Yes I'm sexy, 0:06:41.279 --> 0:06:44.119 but I do it more like on that Lizzo trip, 0:06:44.160 --> 0:06:47.159 because Lizzo is so empowering. She is a plus size 0:06:47.240 --> 0:06:50.760 woman who does not care, and for me, that's inspirational. 0:06:51.279 --> 0:06:54.159 I follow her and test holiday because I'm like, they're beautiful, 0:06:54.240 --> 0:06:57.400 big women and they make me feel sexy. And that's 0:06:57.400 --> 0:06:59.120 why I share that part, not to be like, oh 0:06:59.160 --> 0:07:01.479 my god, I'm trying to show my ass. But you 0:07:01.520 --> 0:07:05.719 know what, sadly, I've noticed now more than ever, you guys, 0:07:06.760 --> 0:07:09.840 the more skin you show, the more ass you show, 0:07:10.040 --> 0:07:12.720 the more tips you show, the more fucking likes and 0:07:12.840 --> 0:07:16.960 views you get. Then you share something positive like a 0:07:17.080 --> 0:07:20.000 quote or I don't know, you go and like feed 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:22.880 the homeless. There's something positive, something good, and it doesn't 0:07:22.920 --> 0:07:24.520 get as many views and as many likes, And you 0:07:24.560 --> 0:07:27.560 know what, let's not focus on that anymore, because first 0:07:27.560 --> 0:07:30.320 of all, the algorithm is all crazy. But people just 0:07:30.320 --> 0:07:32.440 aren't liking anymore. And that's okay, Like, don't focus on 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:33.880 the numbers, on the amount of likes that you get. 0:07:33.880 --> 0:07:36.480 Are the views, but the truth is the truth, you know, 0:07:36.640 --> 0:07:39.120 That's what's happening. And I've noticed that even on my 0:07:39.120 --> 0:07:40.960 own account, I'm like, oh my god, when I post 0:07:41.000 --> 0:07:43.120 this or I'm being you know a little bit like 0:07:43.400 --> 0:07:46.640 you know, wratchet Jenney, I get a lot of likes 0:07:46.680 --> 0:07:48.480 and I get a lot of views, and I'm like, okay, cool. 0:07:48.880 --> 0:07:50.800 I just wish that we would get the same amount 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:53.240 of love on these positive things, you know, were like 0:07:53.280 --> 0:08:06.560 when I'm cooking or something, you know. Getting back to 0:08:07.080 --> 0:08:09.480 taking the break. So when I took my long break 0:08:09.560 --> 0:08:15.920 back in, I deleted Instagram completely. All my social media platforms, 0:08:15.960 --> 0:08:18.760 I deleted them completely from my phone. When I take 0:08:18.800 --> 0:08:24.280 the mini breaks, I have trained my mind to really 0:08:24.360 --> 0:08:26.880 challenge myself because for a long time, I was getting 0:08:26.920 --> 0:08:29.400 to the point where I was just bored or I 0:08:29.400 --> 0:08:31.840 wasn't even thinking, and my finger would go directly to 0:08:31.880 --> 0:08:33.920 Instagram because for me, that's staff that I use the most. 0:08:34.200 --> 0:08:36.000 I used to use Twitter a lot, like a lot 0:08:36.120 --> 0:08:39.040 back in, and I still love Twitter, but the one 0:08:39.080 --> 0:08:41.240 that I used the most is Instagram. And I was 0:08:41.280 --> 0:08:43.480 finding myself just like out of nowhere going to my 0:08:43.520 --> 0:08:45.160 Instagram and I was like, I just got out of 0:08:45.160 --> 0:08:46.920 the app and I just started scrolling and I'm just 0:08:46.960 --> 0:08:49.320 like why am I doing this? It just became like 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:54.240 this crazy ass vicious cycle and habit that I just 0:08:54.280 --> 0:08:56.920 started telling myself, like mentally challenging myself and be like, 0:08:57.000 --> 0:08:59.200 don't go like I had to remind myself over and 0:08:59.240 --> 0:09:01.360 over and now to the point where I don't spend 0:09:01.400 --> 0:09:04.240 a lot of screen time because I like to just 0:09:04.280 --> 0:09:06.440 post and get out. I'll go in real quick on 0:09:06.480 --> 0:09:08.280 the post that I just posted, and like comming back 0:09:08.320 --> 0:09:10.440 to people. I love to do that, and then I 0:09:10.480 --> 0:09:12.920 just get out because I try not to get myself 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:15.640 too involved in looking at what's going on unless I'm 0:09:15.679 --> 0:09:18.600 like really not busy, and I'll take a little bit 0:09:18.640 --> 0:09:20.360 of time. But I try my best not to be 0:09:20.400 --> 0:09:23.920 on social media unnecessarily because I don't want to lose 0:09:24.080 --> 0:09:27.760 that love and that passion and what social media is 0:09:27.800 --> 0:09:30.880 really for, it's to share and for me, I feel 0:09:30.920 --> 0:09:33.680 like my responsibility is to be a positive force in 0:09:33.679 --> 0:09:37.040 the world and share quotes and share things and share 0:09:37.040 --> 0:09:38.720 my thoughts and share the real side of me. So 0:09:38.760 --> 0:09:41.280 I don't want to lose that, because for a while 0:09:41.400 --> 0:09:44.400 I did, I was just like it became just more 0:09:44.559 --> 0:09:49.000 of a I have to do it versus something that 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:52.240 gave me pleasure. So now if I do want to 0:09:52.240 --> 0:09:55.200 take a little break, I'll just move my app into 0:09:55.280 --> 0:09:57.400 like one of those like the group apps where you 0:09:57.400 --> 0:09:59.040 put like a bunch of them in there, and then 0:09:59.120 --> 0:10:01.040 it's harder for me to get too. So I'll sometimes 0:10:01.040 --> 0:10:03.319 do that, like if I'm on vacation, or when the 0:10:03.440 --> 0:10:05.880 media and I went to Yosemite, I put my phone 0:10:05.880 --> 0:10:07.600 completely away, and I was like, I'm just gonna put 0:10:07.600 --> 0:10:09.680 it away because I don't even want my little fingers, 0:10:09.720 --> 0:10:11.280 because they have a mind of their own, to go 0:10:11.320 --> 0:10:13.800 to these apps and start looking, and you know, sometimes 0:10:13.880 --> 0:10:15.240 I could be in a great mood and then I 0:10:15.240 --> 0:10:17.719 see something negative that someone who said, you know, about me. 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:21.280 I just recently stopped following a lot of these accounts, 0:10:21.320 --> 0:10:24.120 like you know, the cheese myt pages or like even 0:10:24.360 --> 0:10:26.680 big shows that are on television that have Instagrams, I 0:10:26.720 --> 0:10:29.200 stopped following them because sometimes I would come across things 0:10:29.200 --> 0:10:31.840 that they would say about me, and it would sometimes 0:10:31.840 --> 0:10:33.840 just put me in a weird mood, you know. So 0:10:33.920 --> 0:10:35.360 I was like, I'm not trying to be me and 0:10:35.400 --> 0:10:38.360 I'm grateful, you know, with these people, because the media 0:10:38.440 --> 0:10:41.280 does help your career, but it can also affect it. 0:10:41.880 --> 0:10:43.960 So I was just like for my mental health and 0:10:44.040 --> 0:10:46.880 my mind and my spirit, I'm just going to unfollow them. 0:10:47.000 --> 0:10:49.640 So I did that. Anything that I say on my feed, 0:10:49.679 --> 0:10:51.440 I wanted to be something that's either going to make 0:10:51.440 --> 0:10:53.480 me laugh or make me feel good or inspire me. 0:10:54.040 --> 0:10:56.360 And usually when I take my breaks, a lot of 0:10:56.360 --> 0:10:59.160 people ask me if I'm the one that runs my 0:10:59.240 --> 0:11:02.160 social media. You guys know my assistant, Oh me, I 0:11:02.200 --> 0:11:04.760 have management, I have a record label. There are some 0:11:04.880 --> 0:11:09.319 artists that just completely leave their social media to their team. 0:11:09.360 --> 0:11:12.920 I'm not that person. I have my passwords, I like 0:11:13.040 --> 0:11:15.360 to go in there. I like to post is very rare. 0:11:15.480 --> 0:11:18.520 If I have Omi post or even on my Facebook, 0:11:19.080 --> 0:11:23.080 I will have them put management posted it. But usually, 0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:25.920 and I want to say, nine percent of the time, 0:11:26.000 --> 0:11:28.719 it is me, I'm the one responding. And when I'm 0:11:28.720 --> 0:11:31.800 taking my break, I am very real about it. And 0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:34.040 even Omi will sometimes help me with my god mornings 0:11:34.559 --> 0:11:36.600 and she'll ask me, do you want me to post 0:11:36.640 --> 0:11:38.800 something for you haven't posted anything, And I'm like no, Like, 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:40.680 if I'm taking my break, I'm just like I'm gonna 0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:42.320 take my break and I'm gonna be real about it, 0:11:42.320 --> 0:11:44.800 Like I'm not trying to pretend that I'm on social 0:11:44.800 --> 0:11:47.600 media and when I'm not, like, I'm super transparent and 0:11:47.840 --> 0:11:50.920 honest with you guys about that stuff because that's all 0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:53.600 I know how to be. So, yes, the person that's 0:11:53.640 --> 0:11:55.880 responding to you, the person that's commenting the post and 0:11:55.920 --> 0:11:59.800 that's posting is me, you guys, I don't know, that's 0:11:59.840 --> 0:12:02.160 just me. Call it controlling, call it whatever you want. 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:06.280 But and I think when I took my long break 0:12:06.320 --> 0:12:08.440 in ten, I did have a little bit of fomo. 0:12:09.040 --> 0:12:11.679 I did. I was kind of like, what's going on 0:12:11.720 --> 0:12:14.000 in the world, and you know, my siblings would talk 0:12:14.040 --> 0:12:16.439 about certain things and they would post each other and 0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:18.760 you know, and I kind of feel like left out. 0:12:18.800 --> 0:12:20.600 But I was like, well, this is something that I need. 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:23.439 I'm gonna respect my body and what my body is 0:12:23.480 --> 0:12:25.640 asking my my mind, and I'm going to take this break. 0:12:25.679 --> 0:12:28.200 I'm going to honor it. But I did have a 0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:30.680 tiny bit of fomo. You know, I'm not gonna lie. 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:33.679 And then when I came back, it was a little hard. 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:35.920 When I've taken those breaks, it's a little hard, you guys, 0:12:35.960 --> 0:12:39.000 to come back because you're you kind of like you 0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:41.400 get into like a motion of things in a routine 0:12:41.720 --> 0:12:43.920 kind of then you, you know, come back and you're like, 0:12:43.960 --> 0:12:45.240 oh my god, how do I do this again? It's 0:12:45.280 --> 0:12:46.760 kind of like learning how to ride a bike. And 0:12:46.760 --> 0:12:48.679 that's kind of how I felt. And for me, it's 0:12:48.679 --> 0:12:50.480 important because I have my makeup line, I have my 0:12:50.520 --> 0:12:54.120 skincare line, I work like my my work is social media, 0:12:54.200 --> 0:12:56.000 you know a lot of it. Sometimes I got to 0:12:56.040 --> 0:12:57.440 talk to my business partners and be like, you know, 0:12:57.480 --> 0:13:00.160 they respect it, they understand. But it is a real 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:03.080 tough But I'm telling you, guys, I came across this quote. 0:13:03.240 --> 0:13:05.920 This isn't my motorational quote, by the way, but I 0:13:06.000 --> 0:13:08.760 came across it when I was looking for things. It says, 0:13:08.880 --> 0:13:11.400 when your mental health is bad, give yourself a break. 0:13:11.559 --> 0:13:13.920 Don't make yourself feel guilty for things you can't do. 0:13:14.520 --> 0:13:17.880 Don't feel bad about eating, bad about not doing as 0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:21.920 much as you normally would. You're human. It's okay to struggle. 0:13:22.600 --> 0:13:26.520 Look after yourself and your mind. It's important and I 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:30.200 think a lot of us are so. And I say 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:32.720 us because I have also been caught and sometimes I 0:13:32.760 --> 0:13:35.080 find myself being caught in it where it's I'm not 0:13:35.200 --> 0:13:39.120 living in the moment and we're chasing our goals and 0:13:39.160 --> 0:13:42.800 we're chasing tomorrow and the future, and we get stuck 0:13:42.800 --> 0:13:44.360 in the rat race of life that we are not 0:13:44.400 --> 0:13:46.480 living in the moment. If your body and your mind 0:13:46.559 --> 0:13:48.520 is asking you in this moment, you know what, I'm 0:13:48.559 --> 0:13:50.280 not feeling good. I feel a lot of anxiety, a 0:13:50.280 --> 0:13:53.440 lot of depression. Try to pinpoint where that's coming from. 0:13:53.480 --> 0:13:55.440 And I will guarantee that a little bit of it 0:13:55.480 --> 0:13:58.400 has to do with us being consumed with our phones 0:13:58.520 --> 0:14:01.600 and social media and see other people's things and not 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:05.640 being able to separate their life from your own. I 0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:07.160 guarantee you that it has a little bit to do 0:14:07.240 --> 0:14:08.920 with it, if not a lot to do with it. 0:14:09.120 --> 0:14:11.560 So it's important to respect that and your mental health 0:14:11.679 --> 0:14:15.280 and accept it. First of all, accept it, which means 0:14:15.360 --> 0:14:17.880 is okay, I'm feeling this. It's okay to feel this. 0:14:17.960 --> 0:14:20.600 Doesn't make me a weak person. Let me do what 0:14:20.640 --> 0:14:22.280 I gotta do to fix it. Right now, you know 0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:24.840 what I mean to feel better. So I wanted to 0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:27.280 share that with you guys, because I think a lot 0:14:27.320 --> 0:14:32.280 of us just want to pretend, pretend that we're okay. 0:14:32.600 --> 0:14:35.360 And here's another one. I came across this other quote 0:14:35.400 --> 0:14:36.680 that I want to share with you guys as well. 0:14:37.000 --> 0:14:39.680 It says I saw a post that said I wasn't 0:14:39.680 --> 0:14:43.840 myself for months and nobody noticed. I felt that, you guys. 0:14:43.880 --> 0:14:45.440 I also felt that because that's what the quote says. 0:14:45.440 --> 0:14:48.720 But I also felt it because there were a lot 0:14:48.760 --> 0:14:52.360 of times, especially when I was in certain relationships, that 0:14:52.480 --> 0:14:55.440 I was just going through it. I was kind of 0:14:55.440 --> 0:14:57.840 forced to smile because I felt like that's what I 0:14:57.840 --> 0:15:00.280 needed to do, that's what people expected from me. And 0:15:00.320 --> 0:15:02.000 that's when I learned. I was like, no, I have 0:15:02.080 --> 0:15:03.960 to be a PC real like, if I don't feel 0:15:03.960 --> 0:15:06.440 like posting, if I don't feel like sharing something, if 0:15:06.480 --> 0:15:08.640 I if I even feel like sharing, hey guys, i'm 0:15:08.680 --> 0:15:10.880 going through this, I'm going to do that because there's 0:15:10.920 --> 0:15:13.320 nothing more beautiful than being vulnerable and being honest. There's 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:15.600 a lot of strength in that. So I feel like 0:15:15.600 --> 0:15:19.400 a lot of people now more than ever, pretend they're 0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:24.360 living in this like imaginary like world. And that's cool 0:15:24.400 --> 0:15:26.000 if it works for you, you know what I mean. 0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:27.640 But I just don't want to be stuck in that, 0:15:27.880 --> 0:15:30.800 and I want the people. If you feel anxiety, or 0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:33.720 you feel anything any type of negative way when you 0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:37.960 go on social media. Just know that. I mean, I 0:15:38.000 --> 0:15:41.160 swear to you of the things that you see on 0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:44.880 Instagram are not real on social media. Like that's all 0:15:44.920 --> 0:15:47.280 I have to say. Just know that don't feel the 0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:51.200 pressure and that social pressure of looking a certain way 0:15:51.840 --> 0:15:55.520 because of you know, certain people, certain celebrities like, don't 0:15:55.560 --> 0:15:57.960 feel that pressure. Like you have to honor yourself and 0:15:58.000 --> 0:16:00.480 honor who you are and what you bring to this world. 0:16:01.000 --> 0:16:03.960 I don't know. I can't say that enough because I 0:16:04.000 --> 0:16:06.760 think more than ever now it's happening, and that's why 0:16:06.840 --> 0:16:10.960 there's so much depression, you guys, because of the social 0:16:11.600 --> 0:16:14.960 pressure that we all feel, you know. But anyways, I 0:16:15.000 --> 0:16:17.200 wanted to share those with you guys, and hopefully they 0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:31.120 helped a little bit. I've had friends that instead of 0:16:31.160 --> 0:16:36.280 taking a break, they just delete their social media's completely 0:16:37.080 --> 0:16:40.080 and they just never come back. Emilia is one that 0:16:40.120 --> 0:16:42.480 says like he and that's I think one of the 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:44.520 things that I like about him. He's not all that 0:16:44.600 --> 0:16:47.720 into social media, Like he rarely goes on there. He 0:16:47.760 --> 0:16:49.880 doesn't post too much, and I like that, you know. 0:16:49.920 --> 0:16:52.720 I feel like he brings balance into my life in 0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:56.480 that aspect, and he's learned to understand because At first, 0:16:56.480 --> 0:16:58.840 it was a little difficult because I was on my 0:16:58.880 --> 0:17:00.800 phone quite a bit because I work on my phone. 0:17:00.840 --> 0:17:03.280 I answer emails, I'm texting, I'm sending voice ones all day, 0:17:03.320 --> 0:17:05.040 and then social media, I have to do posts and 0:17:05.080 --> 0:17:07.199 stuff like that. And at first it was kind of 0:17:07.240 --> 0:17:09.760 like he's something he had to get used to, and 0:17:09.840 --> 0:17:11.560 we talked about it. Now he understands it, and now 0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:13.760 I'm also mindful of like if I'm hanging out with him, 0:17:13.760 --> 0:17:16.119 I'm not on my phone as much, or I do everything. 0:17:16.160 --> 0:17:18.040 I have to do all my work before I hang 0:17:18.080 --> 0:17:21.399 out with him because out of respect. But some of 0:17:21.440 --> 0:17:24.679 our friends have completely deleted social media. I mean, I 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:26.119 can't do that. I don't know if I would do 0:17:26.200 --> 0:17:28.680 that either, because I feel like even if I wasn't 0:17:28.680 --> 0:17:31.480 an artist, or maybe, to be honest, if I was 0:17:31.480 --> 0:17:33.920 an artist, maybe I wouldn't have social media. Maybe I'd 0:17:33.920 --> 0:17:38.520 be like this hippie lost like in the world somewhere 0:17:38.680 --> 0:17:40.520 and like with the taco shop because I love to 0:17:40.560 --> 0:17:43.240 like cook and I wouldn't have social media, and I 0:17:43.280 --> 0:17:45.200 would just listen to music all day and just chill 0:17:45.280 --> 0:17:48.560 and surf. That's just if I wasn't an artist. But 0:17:48.640 --> 0:17:50.639 since I'm an artist, and I feel like I have 0:17:50.720 --> 0:17:53.199 this platform and God has me here for a reason. 0:17:54.160 --> 0:17:57.240 I don't think I would ever delete my social media 0:17:57.400 --> 0:17:59.879 unless I was absolutely forced to. But I feel like 0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:05.000 that's my mission helping. If it's not with music, it's 0:18:05.080 --> 0:18:09.639 with my skincare, with my books, with my quotes. I 0:18:09.680 --> 0:18:13.399 feel like I have to use my voice and my 0:18:13.480 --> 0:18:17.080 testimony to help inspire and empower people. And I really 0:18:17.080 --> 0:18:20.440 truly feel that. So I don't know if I would 0:18:20.760 --> 0:18:24.720 ever erase my social media. For sure, take breaks because 0:18:24.720 --> 0:18:26.960 I need them. We all need them. But I don't 0:18:26.960 --> 0:18:29.720 know about erasing it. But to each his own dack in, 0:18:30.080 --> 0:18:32.760 you know, I love it because Emilio post like once 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:35.800 every blue moon, and I don't know, I think it's cool. 0:18:37.160 --> 0:18:39.520 So with that being said, guys, I hope you all 0:18:39.520 --> 0:18:42.600 consider taking breaks from social media and living life in 0:18:42.760 --> 0:18:48.600 real life, not just online. Today's motivational quote is sometimes 0:18:48.600 --> 0:18:51.480 you need to take a break from everyone and spend 0:18:51.520 --> 0:18:56.680 time alone to experience, appreciate, and love yourself. There's nothing 0:18:56.680 --> 0:18:59.480 wrong with breaks, you guys. We all need them to regroup, 0:18:59.720 --> 0:19:03.119 to connect, to center ourselves, to connect with our higher, 0:19:03.160 --> 0:19:07.520 authentic selves. So that's my personal advice to you because 0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:09.640 I've done it and it's helped. So anyways, you guys, 0:19:09.680 --> 0:19:11.719 thank you so much. Thank you for listening to this 0:19:11.760 --> 0:19:14.880 week's episode of Cheeks and Chill. One quick thing before 0:19:14.920 --> 0:19:16.560 we go, I want to let you guys know there's 0:19:16.560 --> 0:19:18.520 a brand new way for us to keep in touch. 0:19:18.760 --> 0:19:21.480 You can now leave me a voice memo directly through 0:19:21.520 --> 0:19:24.439 the I Heart Radio app. Just click the microphone at 0:19:24.440 --> 0:19:27.040 the top of the Cheeks and Chill podcast homepage within 0:19:27.119 --> 0:19:29.600 the I Heart Radio app, and if you don't already 0:19:29.640 --> 0:19:32.400 have the app, you can download it for free. Your 0:19:32.480 --> 0:19:35.640 questions and comments could be featured in a future episode, 0:19:35.680 --> 0:19:37.760 so feel free to let me know what's on your mind. 0:19:37.960 --> 0:19:40.639