1
00:00:01,560 --> 00:00:04,480
Speaker 1: Right now, it is time for the Strawberry Letter. And

2
00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:08,119
Speaker 1: if you need advice and relationships on dating, work, sex, parenting,

3
00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:11,040
Speaker 1: and more. Please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve Harvey

4
00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:16,120
Speaker 1: FM and click submit Strawberry Letter. Tell him Steve click

5
00:00:16,280 --> 00:00:20,200
Speaker 1: and submit Strawberry letta Shirley. Yes, then we can read

6
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:24,520
Speaker 1: your letter just like we're gonna read this one today. Live. Wow,

7
00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:28,280
Speaker 1: this is something right here. Buckle up, hold on tight.

8
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,000
Speaker 1: We got it for you. Here it is. It's the

9
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:36,479
Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter. Subject. I'm losing my fine and flirty wife.

10
00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:40,559
Speaker 1: Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been married for close to eight years,

11
00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:43,800
Speaker 1: and over the weekend, my wife told me that she

12
00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:46,840
Speaker 1: is not in love with me anymore. I'm a big

13
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,360
Speaker 1: guy and my wife used to be a big girl,

14
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:53,120
Speaker 1: but she recently had cosmetic surgery to fix a few

15
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:57,520
Speaker 1: issues she was having. Now she thinks she's God's gift

16
00:00:57,560 --> 00:01:01,000
Speaker 1: to the world. She's been posting all kinds of sexy

17
00:01:01,080 --> 00:01:05,520
Speaker 1: pictures on Facebook, and when random men comment on her pictures,

18
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:09,280
Speaker 1: she writes back to them. It's like she craves the attention.

19
00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:13,440
Speaker 1: I went through her private direct messages on Facebook and

20
00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:17,240
Speaker 1: found out that she has been having several intimate conversations

21
00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,360
Speaker 1: with different guys. She even met up with one of

22
00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:23,839
Speaker 1: the guys, but it looks like nothing happened between them.

23
00:01:24,280 --> 00:01:27,120
Speaker 1: Like I said, I'm a big guy, and I was

24
00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:30,360
Speaker 1: a big guy when my wife and when we got married.

25
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:32,319
Speaker 1: When I met my wife and when we got married,

26
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:35,600
Speaker 1: everything in our marriage seemed to change once she had

27
00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,840
Speaker 1: the weight loss surgery. She's really feeling herself and forgetting

28
00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:43,480
Speaker 1: about the marriage. Vows I still love this woman, and

29
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,640
Speaker 1: I praise her and tell her how great she looks,

30
00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:50,000
Speaker 1: but it's not enough. I love her, but I'm afraid

31
00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:52,640
Speaker 1: of losing her to a man that's in better physical

32
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,600
Speaker 1: shape than I am. Please give me some advice so

33
00:01:55,720 --> 00:02:00,760
Speaker 1: I won't lose my wife. Well, it looks like you've

34
00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:06,720
Speaker 1: lost her to a degree already. You know, I'm really

35
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:09,440
Speaker 1: sorry that you're going through this. I really am. Your

36
00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:12,600
Speaker 1: wife is wrong, she's out of line and not to mention,

37
00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:16,520
Speaker 1: being very disrespectful to you right now for her to

38
00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:20,520
Speaker 1: say she's not in love with you anymore. Why because

39
00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:23,160
Speaker 1: you're still a big guy and she's lost weight or

40
00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:25,839
Speaker 1: has this been you know, happening for a while. Now

41
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,600
Speaker 1: she's she's stripping because she lost the weight she had

42
00:02:28,639 --> 00:02:31,440
Speaker 1: the surgery and now, yeah, you're right, she is feeling

43
00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:36,120
Speaker 1: herself and thinking she's God's give to the world. You know,

44
00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:38,440
Speaker 1: what can you do? Please give me some advice so

45
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:41,760
Speaker 1: that I won't lose my wife. You guys were both

46
00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:45,560
Speaker 1: big when when you got together. I mean, how's your health?

47
00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:49,680
Speaker 1: How's everything? She went and got surgery and everything. Why

48
00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:52,840
Speaker 1: don't you consider that? You don't have to. I'm not

49
00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:55,680
Speaker 1: saying it, but why don't you consider that on your own,

50
00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:58,520
Speaker 1: getting surgery and losing the weight and going to the

51
00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:01,160
Speaker 1: gym and you know, changing your eating habits and things

52
00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:03,720
Speaker 1: like that. Maybe it's a good thing. You know, she's

53
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:06,160
Speaker 1: not going about it the right way, but but it

54
00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:08,280
Speaker 1: could be a good thing for you and your health

55
00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:11,639
Speaker 1: and everything, and you'll feel better about yourself, you know,

56
00:03:11,919 --> 00:03:14,960
Speaker 1: because a lot of times when you start feeling good

57
00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:18,239
Speaker 1: about yourself, especially if you haven't in a long long time,

58
00:03:18,639 --> 00:03:20,919
Speaker 1: you know, you can react this way. I think your

59
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:24,480
Speaker 1: your your wife is just you know, so crazy with this.

60
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,080
Speaker 1: She's not in love with you anymore. So what is

61
00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:30,520
Speaker 1: she going to file for? Is she going to file

62
00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:33,240
Speaker 1: for divorce now? Because she's not in love with you anymore.

63
00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:38,520
Speaker 1: You know, come on, this is just disrespectful. If it

64
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:41,240
Speaker 1: were you who lost the weight and everything, she would

65
00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:44,400
Speaker 1: be feeling some kind of way as well. So you know,

66
00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:46,839
Speaker 1: all I can do is say, if she's gonna try

67
00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:49,720
Speaker 1: and disrespect you and walk out on you and divorce you,

68
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:53,760
Speaker 1: you're gonna have to, you know, get yourself together, get

69
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:56,280
Speaker 1: yourself together. If that doesn't keep her, then she wasn't

70
00:03:56,320 --> 00:03:59,760
Speaker 1: meant for you anyway. You know, we talk about this

71
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,480
Speaker 1: a lot on the on the show money makes you

72
00:04:02,520 --> 00:04:04,960
Speaker 1: more of who you are. Maybe, you know, losing weight

73
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,760
Speaker 1: and getting to yourself, this is who she was anyway.

74
00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:12,040
Speaker 1: Maybe she settled for you, you know, in her mind,

75
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:14,080
Speaker 1: and now she feels she can do a lot better.

76
00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,760
Speaker 1: But I think you can do a lot better getting

77
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:19,279
Speaker 1: someone to respect you and love you for who you are,

78
00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,760
Speaker 1: and then, you know, maybe together you can lose. And

79
00:04:22,920 --> 00:04:33,000
Speaker 1: if if that's what you want to do. Steve, uh, well, yeah,

80
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:36,800
Speaker 1: I know you're going in. You showed no the hell

81
00:04:36,920 --> 00:04:40,320
Speaker 1: I am. I don't even know? Why are we really

82
00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:44,880
Speaker 1: hin't here? We? Why ain't nobody said the key words?

83
00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:50,400
Speaker 1: And not anybody I don't okay, Shirley, I appreciate your

84
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:52,960
Speaker 1: answer and everything, But let me try to help big

85
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:57,039
Speaker 1: fella out. Big fella steal in low with his girl.

86
00:04:57,120 --> 00:05:00,560
Speaker 1: She wouldn't got herself together now she thinks she all

87
00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:05,560
Speaker 1: ladding a bag of chips. I don't know what to

88
00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:07,520
Speaker 1: tell you, man. The best thing I can tell you

89
00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:09,280
Speaker 1: is I think you ought to get in shape and

90
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:15,320
Speaker 1: leave hug that's my best advice to you. I can

91
00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:21,440
Speaker 1: see that she obviously does not know any scriptures do

92
00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:23,760
Speaker 1: unto others as you would have them do unto you.

93
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,040
Speaker 1: She must not know that pride cometh before a fall.

94
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:31,279
Speaker 1: She must not know that this one probably ain't in

95
00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:36,480
Speaker 1: that gluttony is a sin, that's nothing, and he just

96
00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:44,839
Speaker 1: sitting up there, Okay, careful. That's why I'm there is

97
00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:48,479
Speaker 1: no real answer for this letter. I feel sorry for

98
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:51,440
Speaker 1: the guy. It's a dog on shame that the woman

99
00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:53,000
Speaker 1: to win in there and told him she don't love

100
00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:54,839
Speaker 1: him though, because she thinks she's gonna go out and

101
00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:57,360
Speaker 1: have this spectacle of life. But she finning go out

102
00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,600
Speaker 1: here and find out what's really out here. It's a

103
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:03,039
Speaker 1: lie at of tricking going on out here, and she

104
00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:07,000
Speaker 1: gonna run into it. So even though I feel sorry

105
00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,240
Speaker 1: for your brother, and you don't want to lose your wife,

106
00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:12,719
Speaker 1: and now she fine. Best thing I could do for him.

107
00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:16,880
Speaker 1: If you can't beat them, join them. I suggest you

108
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:20,120
Speaker 1: go get fine and you don't have to use surgery.

109
00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,839
Speaker 1: You can exercise and start eating the right foods and

110
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,600
Speaker 1: you could get your inn in six months. Let her

111
00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:30,200
Speaker 1: go and you get somebody else too, Right, take a

112
00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:33,160
Speaker 1: little longer than it. Yeah, probably take a little bit long.

113
00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:35,200
Speaker 1: In the six months. You got the rest of your life.

114
00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:38,839
Speaker 1: And there's a lot of women out here looking for

115
00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:42,159
Speaker 1: good men like you. All right, Steve, We'll be back

116
00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,679
Speaker 1: with part two of your response to today's Strawberry Letters

117
00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:49,919
Speaker 1: subject I'm losing my fine and flirting wife. We'll be

118
00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:53,120
Speaker 1: back at twenty three after the hour right after this.

119
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:58,680
Speaker 1: You're listening, all right? Here, we are back with part

120
00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:01,480
Speaker 1: two of the Strawberry Letter for today's subject, I'm losing

121
00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:04,760
Speaker 1: my fine and flirty wife. You want to recap, Steve,

122
00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:09,360
Speaker 1: just dude met his wife. They were both large, full

123
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:12,880
Speaker 1: figured people. They got married. When she married him, he

124
00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:15,640
Speaker 1: was full figured. She didn't mess around and got the

125
00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:18,520
Speaker 1: little surgery, and now she didn't lost a bunch of weight.

126
00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:22,640
Speaker 1: Now she fined she flirts with people all the time,

127
00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:26,960
Speaker 1: people talking to him and you know, now she online

128
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:30,720
Speaker 1: having sexy conversations with me and that's commenting on her

129
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:34,000
Speaker 1: picture and everything, and she talking back to him. And

130
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:37,480
Speaker 1: dude been finding this. And she even went out with

131
00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:40,880
Speaker 1: one guy somewhere he discovered and you know, they didn't

132
00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:43,680
Speaker 1: have sex and nothing. He don't think then she didn't

133
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,040
Speaker 1: came in the house and told him she don't love

134
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,720
Speaker 1: him no more. And one of the big things I

135
00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:51,480
Speaker 1: didn't say in the first hassle, she ain't used to

136
00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:54,880
Speaker 1: this new attention she got so now here she is

137
00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,840
Speaker 1: she brand new with it. But she fled to find

138
00:07:57,880 --> 00:08:02,480
Speaker 1: out a lot about attention. Though. All attention don't come

139
00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:06,680
Speaker 1: with good intentions. When a person is paying your attention,

140
00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:10,400
Speaker 1: what you really need to do is locate and find

141
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:17,880
Speaker 1: out the intention. Because attention is flattering, intention usually has

142
00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:20,920
Speaker 1: a dark side to it. That's what I've founded in

143
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:24,240
Speaker 1: my life. Ladies, let me give you a piece of advice.

144
00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,360
Speaker 1: Why are you sitting there smiling and being flattered with

145
00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,520
Speaker 1: the attention. What you need to get to doing is

146
00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:35,720
Speaker 1: focus on what his intention is, because the intention could

147
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:38,839
Speaker 1: get you in a lot of trouble. That's right, that's

148
00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:43,439
Speaker 1: because she's fine. Yeah, but when you get over that, man, dog,

149
00:08:44,240 --> 00:08:47,360
Speaker 1: you know what, many find people out and met and

150
00:08:47,679 --> 00:08:53,600
Speaker 1: something really wrong with them. Yeah. Have you have you

151
00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:56,680
Speaker 1: ever had a conversation with somebody who, outward appearances you

152
00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,840
Speaker 1: thought was cool and then they started talking and you

153
00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:05,200
Speaker 1: your eyes started doing that rapid eye movement. Yeah, hey

154
00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:09,360
Speaker 1: like silence that you damn this scanning in the room,

155
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:11,720
Speaker 1: trying to figure out hold of man, is anybody watching

156
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:16,040
Speaker 1: me over here in this corner? Which true? Yeah, it's sad, man,

157
00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:19,840
Speaker 1: So always do that. Always think about attention that I'm getting,

158
00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:23,760
Speaker 1: and right behind the attention, what is the intention? Yeah,

159
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:27,120
Speaker 1: she's disrespectful that. I think this happens a lot. O.

160
00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:30,120
Speaker 1: Women get these surgeries. I'm just saying that women get

161
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,720
Speaker 1: these surgery. You think this happens a lot? And then

162
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:35,000
Speaker 1: the husband is insecure after that? Yeah? I think so.

163
00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:38,160
Speaker 1: I think it happens a lot, especially if they were

164
00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,960
Speaker 1: both you know, heavy to begin with. That's all right,

165
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:45,800
Speaker 1: you know, And so now she's changed right and lost

166
00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:48,200
Speaker 1: all this weight. Now she doesn't want her husband anymore,

167
00:09:48,240 --> 00:09:52,360
Speaker 1: so she's you know, seeking out other men. Yeah, that's terrible. Love.

168
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:56,760
Speaker 1: You're gonna feel pretty insecure. Once she tell you she

169
00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,599
Speaker 1: don't love you know more, and she online talking to

170
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:05,319
Speaker 1: other you gonna feel some kind of that's hurtful. That's hurtful. No, man,

171
00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:12,000
Speaker 1: if she's wrong, O money, Yeah, she's terribly wrong. Yeah,

172
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:15,280
Speaker 1: I'd probably help pay for the surge. Yeah, oh yeah,

173
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:19,760
Speaker 1: I believe that hard working man because it would make

174
00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:24,240
Speaker 1: her happy. Dog, because he wanted to make her happy.

175
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:27,200
Speaker 1: He can, you know, to do something to make himself

176
00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:31,040
Speaker 1: feel better and get better, get healthy, you know, lose

177
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:33,760
Speaker 1: some weight if he he doesn't seem like he didn't

178
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,640
Speaker 1: mention that in the letter, but I mean that could

179
00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:40,320
Speaker 1: help him have more confidence in himself. I mean, this

180
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:43,560
Speaker 1: could be the motivating factor that a a person need. Yeah,

181
00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:47,560
Speaker 1: absolutely absolutely. He's hurt right now. Yeah, but you know

182
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:49,160
Speaker 1: what I mean. What you don't want to do is

183
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:53,480
Speaker 1: compound the problem with another problem. So what you don't

184
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,400
Speaker 1: want to do is now you depressed. Now you're sitting

185
00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:59,400
Speaker 1: at the house eating because she out, and now you're

186
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:02,560
Speaker 1: eating and you come pounding your problem. Yeah, now she

187
00:11:02,679 --> 00:11:08,000
Speaker 1: come home, You got ice cream around your mouth, gotten

188
00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:12,640
Speaker 1: milk commercial and then you know where you're being baby,

189
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:17,440
Speaker 1: you know, so he could get in shape. Oh, he

190
00:11:17,440 --> 00:11:20,520
Speaker 1: could just stop barbecueing every weekend, get her back fat.

191
00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:27,360
Speaker 1: Those are yeah, that sound. You can get yourself in

192
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,320
Speaker 1: shre here, go your option, you can go plant base,

193
00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:35,080
Speaker 1: gonna get yourself down, get self control, you can go

194
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:40,080
Speaker 1: and get yourself in shape. All you could just go

195
00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:43,800
Speaker 1: on and start making pies and stuff and just get

196
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:52,400
Speaker 1: your girl back fat, really work the fat back. Yea. Yeah,

197
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:54,400
Speaker 1: but I feel for him. No one wants to be

198
00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:57,000
Speaker 1: in a marriage for eight years and then all of

199
00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,400
Speaker 1: a sudden somebody says I don't love you anymore. That's

200
00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,760
Speaker 1: that's so crushing. That's crushing to a person. Yeah, well

201
00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:07,360
Speaker 1: I've been crushed twice, so he would go, Yeah, I

202
00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:13,720
Speaker 1: mean right, and and you survived, So come on, let's

203
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:18,160
Speaker 1: go and get through this. What you're gonna do. Chalking

204
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:21,640
Speaker 1: up to the game, I had two people tell me it

205
00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:23,440
Speaker 1: it ain't love me no more. Yeah, I mean it

206
00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:27,600
Speaker 1: happens for sure. Yeah, but get out. I've heard it

207
00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:32,440
Speaker 1: with that too. You never he least ain't heard that. Wow,

208
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,240
Speaker 1: I didn't heard. I don't love y'all. Don't heard this

209
00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:38,120
Speaker 1: right here? How about this right here? I can't stand you?

210
00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:42,840
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that hurts, hurt. All of it hurts. Yeah,

211
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:46,680
Speaker 1: it's hurtful, especially with someone you still love and he

212
00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:49,480
Speaker 1: he clearly still loves his wife. You know, Oh that

213
00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:53,800
Speaker 1: wasn't the case. Well, this letter is not about you.

214
00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:55,839
Speaker 1: I just want you know once you come in and

215
00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:58,640
Speaker 1: you make the announcement that you don't love me, as

216
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,040
Speaker 1: soon as you get through that, so before you take

217
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,520
Speaker 1: your next breath, uh huh, Well I can't stand your

218
00:13:04,559 --> 00:13:08,400
Speaker 1: at Yeah, I ain't gonna be. You don't want to

219
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:12,720
Speaker 1: stand here, Phillis. Thank you for sharing. Steve, we gotta welcome.

220
00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:16,599
Speaker 1: Please email us or Instagram us Today's Strawberry Letter and

221
00:13:16,679 --> 00:13:20,160
Speaker 1: Steve Harvey FM or My Girl Shirley. You're listening to

222
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:21,920
Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show.