1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:05,560 Speaker 1: Ay, kitty misconnections. That was me staring. There's only two 2 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:08,560 Speaker 1: places to find true love in this world. One is 3 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:11,760 Speaker 1: at the beginner's karate class when you lock eyes during 4 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:17,200 Speaker 1: the groin kicking demonstration. Huh oh my god. The other 5 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:21,280 Speaker 1: is on the pages of craigslist dot org. We scoured 6 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:23,639 Speaker 1: that website every week to find the best misconnections that 7 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:26,960 Speaker 1: they have to offer, like this first one, titled skate 8 00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:31,480 Speaker 1: Me All Night Long, hey Man for woman twenty one 9 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:36,120 Speaker 1: halfpipe near East Maine, ah skateboard. Okay, I was thinking 10 00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:38,600 Speaker 1: roar ring, he says. This is for the chick I 11 00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:41,800 Speaker 1: met at the skate park last weekend. I was feeling 12 00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: your beanie and that flannel you were rocking. But I 13 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:49,000 Speaker 1: apologize for complimenting your road rash on your neck as 14 00:00:49,159 --> 00:00:52,280 Speaker 1: a war wound. You corrected me and said it's just 15 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 1: a bad case of ezema. I was gonna say, how 16 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:58,440 Speaker 1: do you get your neckge? Okay? Fuck? Luckily I googled 17 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:02,120 Speaker 1: that and it's not contained. Whoa, because I wasn't sure 18 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:06,720 Speaker 1: if I could be within one hundred yards of your skin. 19 00:01:06,880 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: Right he's missed all the commercials. Yeah, he didn't know, 20 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:13,120 Speaker 1: he says. We shredded, then hung out. I shared my 21 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:16,959 Speaker 1: lunch with you. Couple zero sugar Monster Energy drinks corn 22 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:24,600 Speaker 1: nuts in a half jewel podh whoa IDK if Craigslist 23 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:27,840 Speaker 1: will work. But my uncle Stu told me he met 24 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:31,080 Speaker 1: his third wife on here, so hey worth a shot? 25 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:34,319 Speaker 1: All right? Maybe see this tell me what flavor of 26 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:37,240 Speaker 1: corn nuts I had. That way, i'll know it's you 27 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:41,199 Speaker 1: because there's gonna be multiple women responding to this, I'm sure. 28 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:45,399 Speaker 1: So maybe we'll meet up and if you're lucky, I 29 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,520 Speaker 1: can rub some of your eggs and cream on a 30 00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:54,480 Speaker 1: certain area of mine. It's like massage oil, just medicated. 31 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 1: That's signed chott oh oh. This next misconnection is titled 32 00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:02,520 Speaker 1: someone has crush on their seat mate. Hint, it's me 33 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:07,800 Speaker 1: woman for Man thirty two, bus number nineteen. This could 34 00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:12,959 Speaker 1: be cute, baby, she said, Optimism brook she says. Saturday morning, 35 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,520 Speaker 1: I got on the bus and there were two seats left. 36 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 1: One was next to you and the other was by 37 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 1: an elderly Chinese man with a cough that sounded like 38 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,200 Speaker 1: a sick whale. Oh no, I didn't hear that. It 39 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:27,360 Speaker 1: was a tough decision, but I ended up picking the 40 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:31,480 Speaker 1: seat by you ah, and I'm glad I did. You 41 00:02:31,520 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 1: were cuter than I originally thought, like, as you got 42 00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 1: closer to him, that's actually a good sign. It's usually 43 00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 1: the other way around. Wearing a fitted T shirt, maybe 44 00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:44,840 Speaker 1: two fitted, I could see that salt and pepper belly 45 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:48,600 Speaker 1: button hair you were rocking rose. Hopefully that's what it was. 46 00:02:48,919 --> 00:02:51,960 Speaker 1: Either that or a family of spiders nesting in that hole. 47 00:02:53,560 --> 00:02:59,080 Speaker 1: So cute, that's image. I love spiders. I already have 48 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:04,920 Speaker 1: a hatred for belly buttons. They are cave. Yeah. After 49 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:07,200 Speaker 1: we rode together for a few stops, you asked me 50 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:09,960 Speaker 1: why I kept pulling the cord but never got off. 51 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:16,320 Speaker 1: Would you like to get off? I didn't respond, but duh, 52 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:18,640 Speaker 1: it's so I could maximize the amount of time we 53 00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:23,600 Speaker 1: had together. So more stops, more time. I get you 54 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:27,040 Speaker 1: so annoying to everybody on the bus. We didn't talk much, 55 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:31,040 Speaker 1: but if you're curious, I'm thirty two. Enjoy mobile games, 56 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:36,880 Speaker 1: Hillary Clinton documentaries and jump rope. Reply back with your 57 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:40,680 Speaker 1: favorite Hillary Clinton dock so you also Full disclosure, I 58 00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,880 Speaker 1: was diagnosed with a minor sleep disorder called cat walking, 59 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 1: where I sleep walk around my house holding my cat. 60 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:54,320 Speaker 1: Adorable Oh my god, you're making me so vulnerable right now, confused. 61 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,000 Speaker 1: So if you haven't figured it out by now, I 62 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:00,640 Speaker 1: really want to go out with you. Here it is, 63 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,360 Speaker 1: I can do any day this week, except for tonight. 64 00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:08,760 Speaker 1: I'm having dinner with that elderly Chinese man, but only 65 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:10,840 Speaker 1: to give him some of my grandma's medicine for his 66 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:15,280 Speaker 1: whale costs. I don't think I'll mess around with him 67 00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:21,880 Speaker 1: unless he pays. I'm sorry, I'm naughty. That's from Mary Christy. 68 00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:25,080 Speaker 1: Imagining some girl making out with an old guy with 69 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:29,640 Speaker 1: a heavy cop is really funny, though. Yeah, there you 70 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:33,520 Speaker 1: go this. Yeah. His next misconnection is titled you were 71 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:37,920 Speaker 1: the Real excursion Man for Woman thirty nine Love Boat. 72 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:41,239 Speaker 1: He says, looking to get in contact with the beauty 73 00:04:41,279 --> 00:04:44,520 Speaker 1: I met on the island cruise last month, But since 74 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:49,880 Speaker 1: Carnival has a policy about not releasing confidential customer info, 75 00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:54,159 Speaker 1: I guess I have to try Craigslist. Darn Carnival has 76 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:57,680 Speaker 1: the rules. Carniv will be the only one that's like, yeah, yeah, 77 00:04:57,720 --> 00:05:00,400 Speaker 1: yeah for you. We met on the third day on 78 00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:03,760 Speaker 1: the pool deck. You wore a turquoise bikini and I 79 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:09,240 Speaker 1: think your name was Serena or cicada what it was 80 00:05:09,279 --> 00:05:11,800 Speaker 1: hard to hear over the commotion after I dropped my 81 00:05:11,839 --> 00:05:17,480 Speaker 1: Pina kolada in the hot tub. Yeah, that's why you 82 00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:21,040 Speaker 1: have plastic cups. They're good. Which, by the way, can 83 00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:25,600 Speaker 1: you believe they asked everybody to get out because it's sanitary. 84 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 1: I could smell the pineapple and rum every time I 85 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:33,640 Speaker 1: licked the bubbles. I'm surprised Carnival. They just didn't pass 86 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:37,279 Speaker 1: out straws and call it a fish will that was happening. 87 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,800 Speaker 1: I was lucky enough to score the lawn chair next 88 00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:42,560 Speaker 1: to you, And in case you were wondering, no, I 89 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:45,000 Speaker 1: don't care that someone else had their towel, shirt and 90 00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:49,440 Speaker 1: backpack on it. All of that made its way into 91 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 1: the Lost and Found. Oh that is a bold move 92 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:55,239 Speaker 1: that I've always thought about but could never pull off. Yeah. 93 00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:57,599 Speaker 1: We chatted for a bit, and I think my favorite 94 00:05:57,600 --> 00:06:00,680 Speaker 1: part of the conversation was when we started getting hypothetical, 95 00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:04,560 Speaker 1: Like when I asked that question hypothetically speaking, let's say 96 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:07,600 Speaker 1: there was an emergency on the ship, would you pick 97 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:11,240 Speaker 1: me to be in your lifeboat? Oh? You were funny 98 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:13,400 Speaker 1: and kept saying, why do you keep asking me that? 99 00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:15,880 Speaker 1: Is there gonna be some kind of emergency. It's not 100 00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:20,680 Speaker 1: a cool question, so hilarious anyway, I hope you see this. 101 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:23,479 Speaker 1: If you do, just so you know, I would pick 102 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,080 Speaker 1: you to be in my lifeboat. Bill. You can't even 103 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,560 Speaker 1: remember her name. You and the guy who made the 104 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:31,760 Speaker 1: omelets on station number three. Good choice. Seriously, if I 105 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:34,120 Speaker 1: could eat cruise food for the rest of my life, 106 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:38,719 Speaker 1: I would. Oh that sentence is a red flash, Yeah, 107 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:44,440 Speaker 1: I signed Dougie. All right, all right, enjoy your romance 108 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:46,880 Speaker 1: with the omelet man Son't think the girls calling you baby, 109 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:50,480 Speaker 1: those were your Craig misconnections. Brook and Jeffrey in the 110 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:50,840 Speaker 1: Morning