WEBVTT - Energy Shift

0:00:00.240 --> 0:00:05.520
<v Speaker 1>Time and space can change the energy of your entire family.

0:00:06.570 --> 0:00:09.070
<v Speaker 2>That is a fact. And it is safe to say

0:00:09.210 --> 0:00:13.030
<v Speaker 2>that we have time traveled back to college days, baby.

0:00:13.650 --> 0:00:16.530
<v Speaker 2>DeVal and I alone in this house? Diable.

0:00:21.320 --> 0:00:24.340
<v Speaker 1>It all started with real talk, unfiltered, honest, and straight

0:00:24.360 --> 0:00:26.410
<v Speaker 1>from the heart. Since then, we've gone on to become

0:00:26.450 --> 0:00:29.770
<v Speaker 1>Webby Award winning podcasters and New York Times bestselling authors.

0:00:29.930 --> 0:00:32.589
<v Speaker 2>Deadass was more than a podcast for us. It was

0:00:32.710 --> 0:00:35.290
<v Speaker 2>about our growth. A place where we could be vulnerable,

0:00:35.470 --> 0:00:36.029
<v Speaker 2>be raw.

0:00:36.350 --> 0:00:38.590
<v Speaker 1>But most importantly, be us.

0:00:38.750 --> 0:00:41.730
<v Speaker 2>But as we know, life keeps evolving and so do we.

0:00:41.830 --> 0:00:44.710
<v Speaker 2>And through it all, one thing has never changed.

0:00:45.210 --> 0:00:46.830
<v Speaker 3>This is Ellis Ever After.

0:00:46.850 --> 0:00:47.770
<v Speaker 1>Deadass.

0:00:48.050 --> 0:00:49.730
<v Speaker 2>Because we got a lot to talk about.

0:00:51.479 --> 0:00:52.140
<v Speaker 4>Story time.

0:00:53.020 --> 0:01:05.910
<v Speaker 5>So, after 16 years married, 24 years being together, me

0:01:05.950 --> 0:01:10.890
<v Speaker 5>and Kadeem finally had a house to ourselves without any

0:01:10.990 --> 0:01:13.290
<v Speaker 5>parents or any kids.

0:01:14.030 --> 0:01:14.390
<v Speaker 3>Bruh.

0:01:14.410 --> 0:01:15.510
<v Speaker 1>Okay, that's just how I want to start.

0:01:15.650 --> 0:01:16.010
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah.

0:01:16.050 --> 0:01:16.670
<v Speaker 2>For a weekend.

0:01:16.930 --> 0:01:17.270
<v Speaker 1>Weekend.

0:01:17.390 --> 0:01:20.090
<v Speaker 2>Okay, it was a Friday. The kids didn't have school.

0:01:20.900 --> 0:01:23.550
<v Speaker 2>Papa's food came and picked him up at noon. We

0:01:23.580 --> 0:01:26.510
<v Speaker 2>didn't see him again until Sunday dinner at my mom's house.

0:01:27.890 --> 0:01:32.610
<v Speaker 1>So the first thing Kadeem did was put on some

0:01:32.630 --> 0:01:37.399
<v Speaker 1>boy shorts and a crop top. I made some steaks.

0:01:38.280 --> 0:01:43.120
<v Speaker 1>She made some garlic mashed potatoes. Some corn. We had

0:01:43.160 --> 0:01:43.840
<v Speaker 1>some wine.

0:01:43.860 --> 0:01:44.640
<v Speaker 2>Some string beans.

0:01:44.750 --> 0:01:47.730
<v Speaker 1>We had some alcohol. And we fell asleep.

0:01:49.770 --> 0:01:53.680
<v Speaker 3>I was like, I knew y'all wasn't trying to fuck

0:01:53.760 --> 0:01:56.620
<v Speaker 3>after that.

0:01:57.420 --> 0:01:58.180
<v Speaker 2>We had the itis.

0:01:58.540 --> 0:02:01.720
<v Speaker 1>But no, in all honesty, though, it was the first

0:02:01.760 --> 0:02:05.310
<v Speaker 1>time we had our own space that wasn't like an

0:02:05.390 --> 0:02:08.150
<v Speaker 1>on vacation. We didn't go run into the city for

0:02:08.169 --> 0:02:09.649
<v Speaker 1>a minute to go in the hotel. It was like

0:02:09.750 --> 0:02:14.049
<v Speaker 1>in this actual house, we had peace and quiet. We

0:02:14.070 --> 0:02:18.410
<v Speaker 1>watched the movies. We watched some series. We watched nothing.

0:02:18.450 --> 0:02:20.850
<v Speaker 1>We just had time to just chill.

0:02:20.910 --> 0:02:21.250
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:02:22.090 --> 0:02:25.669
<v Speaker 2>And when I say we went back in time to college,

0:02:26.190 --> 0:02:28.650
<v Speaker 2>I feel like that was the last time, you know,

0:02:28.710 --> 0:02:29.710
<v Speaker 2>without kids.

0:02:30.010 --> 0:02:30.290
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:02:30.330 --> 0:02:32.960
<v Speaker 2>Just being able to do whatever it is we wanted

0:02:33.000 --> 0:02:36.040
<v Speaker 2>to do without essentially a care in the world. You know,

0:02:36.080 --> 0:02:38.220
<v Speaker 2>knowing the kids were good. It was a good time.

0:02:38.240 --> 0:02:41.340
<v Speaker 1>It felt great. We wasn't sleeping the whole.

0:02:41.220 --> 0:02:43.179
<v Speaker 3>Time, though. Clearly.

0:02:43.460 --> 0:02:44.160
<v Speaker 2>Obviously.

0:02:44.180 --> 0:02:47.080
<v Speaker 1>That's why I'm smiling. See how I'm smiling? I don't

0:02:47.139 --> 0:02:48.930
<v Speaker 1>got no facial hair. I look younger, don't I?

0:02:48.980 --> 0:02:51.619
<v Speaker 2>Listen, I found a gray hair that's like reversing sidebar.

0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:53.600
<v Speaker 2>It's brown again.

0:02:53.620 --> 0:02:54.300
<v Speaker 1>That's crazy.

0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:56.640
<v Speaker 2>Stress can really like, yeah.

0:02:57.139 --> 0:03:04.500
<v Speaker 1>And what fixed it? Dirt! No, you sold out.

0:03:04.580 --> 0:03:08.220
<v Speaker 2>More after these messages. All right, karaoke time.

0:03:08.880 --> 0:03:09.180
<v Speaker 1>Yes.

0:03:09.480 --> 0:03:13.490
<v Speaker 2>So we joke about having our space and stuff now, right? However,

0:03:13.530 --> 0:03:15.889
<v Speaker 2>we know, never would have made it. Never would have

0:03:15.930 --> 0:03:18.070
<v Speaker 2>made it without having my parents here with us for

0:03:18.090 --> 0:03:22.160
<v Speaker 2>the past seven years. Traveling to L.A., then now to Georgia,

0:03:22.660 --> 0:03:25.340
<v Speaker 2>having Dakota. We definitely needed the help and we appreciate

0:03:25.360 --> 0:03:26.940
<v Speaker 2>the help. So we joke all the time about wanting

0:03:26.980 --> 0:03:28.380
<v Speaker 2>our space, but at the same time, we have to

0:03:28.400 --> 0:03:30.300
<v Speaker 2>acknowledge how much.

0:03:30.680 --> 0:03:36.370
<v Speaker 1>We joke. But your mother, my mother-in-law, Sharron- Joseph, Sharon

0:03:36.390 --> 0:03:37.310
<v Speaker 1>Brian Joseph.

0:03:37.330 --> 0:03:37.930
<v Speaker 4>What's her name?

0:03:38.010 --> 0:03:38.450
<v Speaker 5>Elaine.

0:03:38.490 --> 0:03:39.190
<v Speaker 3>Brian Joseph.

0:03:39.210 --> 0:03:42.480
<v Speaker 1>I love you, ma. Yes, we love you, ma. We

0:03:42.500 --> 0:03:44.619
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't have been able to do what we did these

0:03:44.740 --> 0:03:48.160
<v Speaker 1>past seven years if you didn't come with us.

0:03:48.640 --> 0:03:49.220
<v Speaker 2>That's a fact.

0:03:49.320 --> 0:03:49.680
<v Speaker 1>Love you.

0:03:49.820 --> 0:03:52.120
<v Speaker 2>That's a fact. So with that being said, with Mimi

0:03:52.140 --> 0:03:54.250
<v Speaker 2>and Papa being close by and your mom and dad

0:03:54.270 --> 0:03:56.410
<v Speaker 2>being close by now, I felt like this song was

0:03:56.530 --> 0:03:57.730
<v Speaker 2>particularly fitting.

0:03:57.750 --> 0:03:58.410
<v Speaker 1>Want me to start it?

0:03:58.690 --> 0:03:59.130
<v Speaker 2>I think you should.

0:04:01.160 --> 0:04:05.660
<v Speaker 1>Ain't no mountain high, ain't no valley low, ain't no

0:04:05.740 --> 0:04:08.080
<v Speaker 1>river wide.

0:04:07.340 --> 0:04:09.130
<v Speaker 6>Enough, baby.

0:04:09.590 --> 0:04:11.250
<v Speaker 2>Anytime you need me.

0:04:11.310 --> 0:04:11.870
<v Speaker 1>That's not it.

0:04:12.130 --> 0:04:12.950
<v Speaker 3>She made them words.

0:04:12.990 --> 0:04:15.590
<v Speaker 1>She made them words up. See how she was joking

0:04:15.670 --> 0:04:15.950
<v Speaker 1>on me?

0:04:16.110 --> 0:04:17.630
<v Speaker 4>You see how she was just reading them?

0:04:17.950 --> 0:04:23.500
<v Speaker 2>She definitely put it out there. You so jinxed me, Deval.

0:04:24.339 --> 0:04:27.760
<v Speaker 3>I was so in my head. I'm so annoyed. She said,

0:04:27.810 --> 0:04:29.950
<v Speaker 3>anytime you need me. She put the song in her

0:04:30.070 --> 0:04:32.490
<v Speaker 3>own words. I sure did.

0:04:32.529 --> 0:04:34.750
<v Speaker 2>You see what you did to me? That's the power

0:04:34.790 --> 0:04:37.490
<v Speaker 2>of manifestation. He literally said before this show, he's like,

0:04:37.510 --> 0:04:38.690
<v Speaker 2>watch you mess the song up now.

0:04:38.830 --> 0:04:43.570
<v Speaker 4>And this is me. I'm thinking she got the words.

0:04:43.610 --> 0:04:44.430
<v Speaker 1>I don't even know the words.

0:04:44.450 --> 0:04:45.430
<v Speaker 4>I'm like, oh, she got it.

0:04:46.529 --> 0:04:50.150
<v Speaker 2>Ain't no mountain high enough.

0:04:50.660 --> 0:04:53.080
<v Speaker 1>You going to mess the song up? Because here's my thing.

0:04:53.200 --> 0:04:54.480
<v Speaker 1>That note is high enough.

0:04:54.640 --> 0:04:55.000
<v Speaker 3>What?

0:04:55.400 --> 0:04:57.960
<v Speaker 1>That note is high enough. All right. The note is

0:04:58.000 --> 0:04:58.440
<v Speaker 1>high enough.

0:04:58.460 --> 0:04:59.099
<v Speaker 2>There we go.

0:04:59.200 --> 0:05:00.720
<v Speaker 1>We're going to leave it there. All right.

0:05:00.920 --> 0:05:02.109
<v Speaker 2>No, it's a good song. Sing it.

0:05:02.120 --> 0:05:03.290
<v Speaker 1>Sing it. It's my triple, triple.

0:05:03.310 --> 0:05:03.750
<v Speaker 2>Let me tap to it.

0:05:03.750 --> 0:05:07.650
<v Speaker 1>No mountains, no valleys, no rainbows. If you need me,

0:05:07.730 --> 0:05:12.270
<v Speaker 1>call me. No matter where you are. No matter how far.

0:05:12.310 --> 0:05:14.110
<v Speaker 2>Come on. Don't worry, baby.

0:05:14.150 --> 0:05:15.609
<v Speaker 3>Just call my name.

0:05:16.080 --> 0:05:19.930
<v Speaker 4>I'll be there in a hurry. You don't have to worry.

0:05:20.130 --> 0:05:26.000
<v Speaker 3>Cause baby, there ain't no mountain high enough. Ain't no

0:05:26.070 --> 0:05:28.740
<v Speaker 3>valley low enough.

0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:29.440
<v Speaker 7>Ain't no.

0:05:30.460 --> 0:05:35.640
<v Speaker 3>Wide enough to keep me from getting to you, baby.

0:05:35.940 --> 0:05:37.580
<v Speaker 6>I love black people because one person always going to

0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:39.040
<v Speaker 6>take the solo out of nowhere.

0:05:39.060 --> 0:05:41.300
<v Speaker 2>That part.

0:05:41.339 --> 0:05:42.460
<v Speaker 1>Trouble, you did well.

0:05:42.660 --> 0:05:43.860
<v Speaker 4>You did very well, Trouble.

0:05:43.900 --> 0:05:46.160
<v Speaker 3>That was the Sister Act 2 version.

0:05:46.200 --> 0:05:47.980
<v Speaker 2>Indeed, indeed, indeed.

0:05:48.000 --> 0:05:49.780
<v Speaker 1>I was thinking the Remember the Titans version.

0:05:49.820 --> 0:05:51.820
<v Speaker 4>That's what I was thinking about.

0:05:51.839 --> 0:05:52.490
<v Speaker 6>Remember the Titans.

0:05:52.730 --> 0:05:54.050
<v Speaker 2>I was singing my own remix, okay?

0:05:54.960 --> 0:05:55.469
<v Speaker 4>You got it, baby.

0:05:55.490 --> 0:05:57.469
<v Speaker 3>She sang the summarized version.

0:05:57.490 --> 0:05:59.250
<v Speaker 2>That part. Ain't no river wide enough.

0:05:59.270 --> 0:05:59.669
<v Speaker 6>It's your house.

0:05:59.690 --> 0:06:00.630
<v Speaker 1>You can sing whatever you want.

0:06:00.650 --> 0:06:02.410
<v Speaker 3>She got the gist of the song and put it

0:06:02.430 --> 0:06:03.169
<v Speaker 3>in her own words.

0:06:03.210 --> 0:06:05.430
<v Speaker 2>Just now, make sure you announce yourself.

0:06:06.690 --> 0:06:08.750
<v Speaker 1>Triple says she got the gist and put it in

0:06:08.770 --> 0:06:10.040
<v Speaker 1>her own words. She AI'd it.

0:06:10.610 --> 0:06:11.150
<v Speaker 4>Exactly.

0:06:11.890 --> 0:06:12.250
<v Speaker 1>Bruh.

0:06:13.720 --> 0:06:15.680
<v Speaker 2>But that being said, we just got to make sure

0:06:15.760 --> 0:06:19.040
<v Speaker 2>anybody who had the house code, announce yourself before you

0:06:19.080 --> 0:06:20.110
<v Speaker 2>come through those doors.

0:06:20.230 --> 0:06:22.810
<v Speaker 6>Facts. Y'all already know me. Facts. Yo!

0:06:23.230 --> 0:06:26.490
<v Speaker 1>Matt be like, I'm here. Yo, we come in from

0:06:26.550 --> 0:06:29.170
<v Speaker 1>workouts and I'll be walking in and Matt will still

0:06:29.210 --> 0:06:31.950
<v Speaker 1>be in the garage. And I turn around, I'm like, oh,

0:06:32.050 --> 0:06:32.990
<v Speaker 1>that's right. That's right.

0:06:33.360 --> 0:06:33.520
<v Speaker 7>Right.

0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:34.920
<v Speaker 2>And for the most part, I know that you come

0:06:34.960 --> 0:06:37.969
<v Speaker 2>back usually with company, but sometimes, like, depending on the day,

0:06:38.010 --> 0:06:39.710
<v Speaker 2>Deval will be like, nah, I'm going to be chilling today.

0:06:39.970 --> 0:06:40.450
<v Speaker 6>It don't matter.

0:06:40.470 --> 0:06:41.810
<v Speaker 2>You know what I do, though? I keep a robe

0:06:41.850 --> 0:06:44.690
<v Speaker 2>on standby, close by, just in case. So if you

0:06:44.710 --> 0:06:46.740
<v Speaker 2>come in and I look homely, it's probably because I'm

0:06:47.100 --> 0:06:48.460
<v Speaker 2>naked underneath.

0:06:48.500 --> 0:06:50.060
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, underneath that.

0:06:50.140 --> 0:06:50.440
<v Speaker 4>It's just.

0:06:50.620 --> 0:06:52.460
<v Speaker 2>It's the spoils of the kids being at school and

0:06:52.480 --> 0:06:54.420
<v Speaker 2>the parents being in their own homes. What can I say?

0:06:54.460 --> 0:06:55.400
<v Speaker 1>Must be nice.

0:06:55.420 --> 0:06:57.700
<v Speaker 2>We're going to pay some bills, and we'll be back

0:06:57.740 --> 0:06:58.310
<v Speaker 2>with Aubrey Noir.

0:07:01.940 --> 0:07:03.719
<v Speaker 4>Don't it feel good to free ball every once in

0:07:03.740 --> 0:07:04.040
<v Speaker 4>a while?

0:07:04.080 --> 0:07:07.540
<v Speaker 6>Yo, yo, bro, bro, bro. That's funny. I was standing

0:07:07.560 --> 0:07:09.219
<v Speaker 6>in the basement. I woke up, you the butt-ass nigga.

0:07:09.260 --> 0:07:10.340
<v Speaker 4>Bro, free ball.

0:07:10.400 --> 0:07:13.420
<v Speaker 6>I looked around, I was like, fuck it.

0:07:13.540 --> 0:07:16.880
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, listen. Yo, if my daughter ever walks out that

0:07:16.940 --> 0:07:21.070
<v Speaker 4>room after like 10 o'clock and I'm in the kitchen, nigga,

0:07:21.170 --> 0:07:25.570
<v Speaker 4>I'm free balling, bro. Bedroom, bedroom, kitchen, bedroom.

0:07:25.650 --> 0:07:27.350
<v Speaker 6>Bro, I feel you, bro.

0:07:27.370 --> 0:07:30.430
<v Speaker 1>You get tired of getting out the bed and, nah,

0:07:30.450 --> 0:07:31.230
<v Speaker 1>I just get out the bed.

0:07:31.970 --> 0:07:32.830
<v Speaker 2>Dang-a-lang-swang.

0:07:32.890 --> 0:07:34.760
<v Speaker 1>Let me just go. Let me just go. Then here

0:07:34.780 --> 0:07:35.300
<v Speaker 1>comes Dakota.

0:07:35.320 --> 0:07:37.380
<v Speaker 4>Why you naked? Oh!

0:07:37.580 --> 0:07:38.680
<v Speaker 6>I knew it was him.

0:07:39.020 --> 0:07:40.840
<v Speaker 4>I knew your balls on the floor.

0:07:40.900 --> 0:07:43.630
<v Speaker 1>That's Dakota. That's Dakota.

0:07:44.190 --> 0:07:44.850
<v Speaker 2>Captain Obvious.

0:07:44.890 --> 0:07:46.930
<v Speaker 1>That is such Dakota, bro. He gonna ask everything.

0:07:47.250 --> 0:07:49.470
<v Speaker 2>That's a fact. All right, champs, what do we have

0:07:49.610 --> 0:07:51.800
<v Speaker 2>today in this episode for Op or No Op?

0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:55.740
<v Speaker 3>All right. So recently in Charlotte. So remember last time

0:07:55.780 --> 0:07:59.140
<v Speaker 3>I was talking about how police are using the flock cameras? Yes.

0:07:59.580 --> 0:08:00.140
<v Speaker 4>Horribly.

0:08:00.260 --> 0:08:02.700
<v Speaker 3>So there was a cop in Charlotte who got he

0:08:02.740 --> 0:08:07.700
<v Speaker 3>was getting reprimanded for using flock cameras incorrectly. And as

0:08:07.880 --> 0:08:11.350
<v Speaker 3>they were doing their investigation, they checked his cell phone

0:08:11.370 --> 0:08:14.570
<v Speaker 3>records and discovered a group chat amongst him and other

0:08:14.610 --> 0:08:18.460
<v Speaker 3>white cops there. who were saying like racist shit. They

0:08:18.480 --> 0:08:21.550
<v Speaker 3>were like, let's see how many black people, they probably said,

0:08:21.590 --> 0:08:25.130
<v Speaker 3>let's see how many niggers we can pull over. And

0:08:25.210 --> 0:08:29.250
<v Speaker 3>so after that, a bunch of cops have quit. A

0:08:29.350 --> 0:08:33.010
<v Speaker 3>bunch of them have gotten terminated. I'm sure some more

0:08:33.030 --> 0:08:34.150
<v Speaker 3>are under investigation.

0:08:34.290 --> 0:08:38.050
<v Speaker 1>They also talked about using firearms against black people and

0:08:38.130 --> 0:08:39.570
<v Speaker 1>using force. They talked about all of that.

0:08:39.590 --> 0:08:40.309
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they did.

0:08:40.490 --> 0:08:43.719
<v Speaker 4>Ain't the police chief, wasn't she black? The police chief,

0:08:43.780 --> 0:08:44.360
<v Speaker 4>she was black, right?

0:08:44.400 --> 0:08:44.600
<v Speaker 6>Yes.

0:08:45.720 --> 0:08:46.240
<v Speaker 4>That's crazy.

0:08:46.320 --> 0:08:47.720
<v Speaker 2>None of those surprises.

0:08:47.760 --> 0:08:49.220
<v Speaker 3>They probably hate her ass, too.

0:08:49.280 --> 0:08:49.580
<v Speaker 4>They do.

0:08:49.600 --> 0:08:51.490
<v Speaker 1>Remember, they talked about it.

0:08:51.660 --> 0:08:52.370
<v Speaker 3>Oh, yeah.

0:08:52.380 --> 0:08:53.680
<v Speaker 4>They were talking about other cops, too.

0:08:53.690 --> 0:08:54.530
<v Speaker 1>About her and other cops.

0:08:54.590 --> 0:08:57.470
<v Speaker 3>Yep, yep, yep, yep. So, op or no op on that?

0:08:58.230 --> 0:09:00.010
<v Speaker 1>Op or no op, not surprised. Not surprised.

0:09:00.410 --> 0:09:02.370
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I mean, that's the only thing. You cannot be

0:09:02.390 --> 0:09:03.490
<v Speaker 4>surprised that this is happening.

0:09:03.850 --> 0:09:05.929
<v Speaker 1>No op, I'm excited. The only thing I will say

0:09:05.970 --> 0:09:08.630
<v Speaker 1>to add to that is... There have been a string

0:09:08.710 --> 0:09:12.090
<v Speaker 1>of lynchings in America over the past several months. They've

0:09:12.130 --> 0:09:14.740
<v Speaker 1>been uptick and they don't have anybody who's done them.

0:09:14.770 --> 0:09:17.660
<v Speaker 1>You know why? It's probably been the police officers. And

0:09:17.679 --> 0:09:20.560
<v Speaker 1>this is an example. What's stopping these very same people

0:09:20.940 --> 0:09:23.260
<v Speaker 1>who had this text chain from pulling a person over?

0:09:23.660 --> 0:09:26.040
<v Speaker 1>They're there by themselves. They're a young person. You check

0:09:26.080 --> 0:09:28.960
<v Speaker 1>their ID. They don't live around here and then gone.

0:09:29.620 --> 0:09:32.660
<v Speaker 1>I'm not being a conspiracy theorist. We look at the 60s.

0:09:32.860 --> 0:09:35.000
<v Speaker 1>This has been happening. Like, we got to open our

0:09:35.070 --> 0:09:37.569
<v Speaker 1>eyes and stop acting like this isn't the reality in America.

0:09:37.890 --> 0:09:40.829
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying? Like, this is facts.

0:09:41.630 --> 0:09:43.270
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, if a cop tries to pull me over, I'm

0:09:43.290 --> 0:09:47.929
<v Speaker 3>going to keep going. I just need y'all to know that.

0:09:47.950 --> 0:09:48.510
<v Speaker 4>You can't do that.

0:09:48.530 --> 0:09:49.050
<v Speaker 6>Please don't do that.

0:09:49.130 --> 0:09:51.810
<v Speaker 3>Well, I need them to send backup. Somebody, we need

0:09:51.870 --> 0:09:52.250
<v Speaker 3>a witness.

0:09:52.450 --> 0:09:52.929
<v Speaker 6>On the cops.

0:09:53.390 --> 0:09:54.290
<v Speaker 1>This is what you should do.

0:09:54.309 --> 0:09:54.950
<v Speaker 4>Do you have Life 360?

0:09:54.950 --> 0:09:55.090
<v Speaker 2>No.

0:09:55.170 --> 0:09:57.570
<v Speaker 3>I should get it.

0:09:57.830 --> 0:09:59.530
<v Speaker 1>You should get Life 360. And if you have people

0:09:59.550 --> 0:10:01.800
<v Speaker 1>in your circle... or your family that you trust, when

0:10:01.820 --> 0:10:03.780
<v Speaker 1>you being pulled over, the first thing you do is say,

0:10:03.800 --> 0:10:05.420
<v Speaker 1>hey guys, I'm being pulled over. I'm letting you know

0:10:05.470 --> 0:10:07.370
<v Speaker 1>I don't know why I'm being pulled over. My location

0:10:07.490 --> 0:10:07.670
<v Speaker 1>is on.

0:10:07.730 --> 0:10:08.350
<v Speaker 2>My location, yeah.

0:10:08.710 --> 0:10:10.449
<v Speaker 1>You know, if something happens to me, I did not

0:10:10.490 --> 0:10:13.170
<v Speaker 1>harm myself. You do something like that and it just,

0:10:13.350 --> 0:10:16.090
<v Speaker 1>you know, let it be clear because... It's scary out here.

0:10:16.250 --> 0:10:17.190
<v Speaker 6>You have a dash cam?

0:10:17.270 --> 0:10:19.210
<v Speaker 4>You could end up in a ditch with your hair braided.

0:10:19.230 --> 0:10:24.100
<v Speaker 4>You don't want that. I just got pulled over. My

0:10:24.140 --> 0:10:26.320
<v Speaker 4>hair is undone like you normally would. You see it braided?

0:10:26.340 --> 0:10:27.330
<v Speaker 4>It wasn't me.

0:10:27.400 --> 0:10:31.880
<v Speaker 2>Josh is so stupid.

0:10:31.900 --> 0:10:34.000
<v Speaker 1>It's sad that we're still doing this, but this goes

0:10:34.020 --> 0:10:36.819
<v Speaker 1>to the last podcast we did. The fears that black

0:10:36.860 --> 0:10:41.359
<v Speaker 1>people have to live with and the gaslighting of watching

0:10:41.400 --> 0:10:44.750
<v Speaker 1>black bodies be brought down from trees. And there's a

0:10:44.750 --> 0:10:47.490
<v Speaker 1>whole hashtag now, black people don't hang themselves.

0:10:47.510 --> 0:10:47.990
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:10:48.190 --> 0:10:50.890
<v Speaker 1>Why do we have to have a hashtag about that?

0:10:51.090 --> 0:10:52.810
<v Speaker 1>And then you gaslight us. Like, why everything got to

0:10:52.830 --> 0:10:53.390
<v Speaker 1>be about race?

0:10:53.809 --> 0:10:54.109
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:10:54.650 --> 0:10:55.309
<v Speaker 4>Like, really?

0:10:55.330 --> 0:10:56.630
<v Speaker 3>Because it is, literally.

0:10:56.860 --> 0:10:57.179
<v Speaker 1>You know?

0:10:57.220 --> 0:10:57.740
<v Speaker 2>Literally.

0:10:57.900 --> 0:11:02.020
<v Speaker 4>America is a gaslight. The whole thing is a gaslight.

0:11:02.800 --> 0:11:03.679
<v Speaker 6>It's a lantern.

0:11:03.900 --> 0:11:05.400
<v Speaker 4>Bro, there was a... It's a lantern.

0:11:05.460 --> 0:11:10.020
<v Speaker 1>There was a... Oh, my gosh. I think it's Pierce Morgan.

0:11:10.210 --> 0:11:10.330
<v Speaker 3>Mm-hmm.

0:11:10.770 --> 0:11:13.449
<v Speaker 1>He had a panel... And there was a white guy

0:11:13.510 --> 0:11:15.580
<v Speaker 1>on there saying, it's like, this is America, okay? This

0:11:15.620 --> 0:11:17.520
<v Speaker 1>is not the place where you just come here and

0:11:17.540 --> 0:11:20.580
<v Speaker 1>you get handouts and you're just giving stuff. And then

0:11:20.600 --> 0:11:22.860
<v Speaker 1>the guy stopped him and said, wait a minute. This

0:11:22.940 --> 0:11:28.160
<v Speaker 1>country was built off of giving white immigrants land that

0:11:28.179 --> 0:11:31.300
<v Speaker 1>they did not own. It's literally, that's what it was

0:11:31.350 --> 0:11:33.270
<v Speaker 1>built off. And the guy stood there almost shocked as

0:11:33.350 --> 0:11:35.620
<v Speaker 1>if like he didn't even know. Yeah. And I'm saying,

0:11:35.660 --> 0:11:39.150
<v Speaker 1>but this is how America gaslights its own people. Because

0:11:39.190 --> 0:11:42.070
<v Speaker 1>the people living here don't even know their own history

0:11:42.190 --> 0:11:43.930
<v Speaker 1>of their own country.

0:11:43.950 --> 0:11:46.170
<v Speaker 2>Did y'all see the young lady? I can't even call

0:11:46.190 --> 0:11:49.640
<v Speaker 2>her young lady. The girl that was in the Minnesota school,

0:11:50.900 --> 0:11:54.819
<v Speaker 2>Turning Point, had a gathering at her university in Minnesota

0:11:55.070 --> 0:11:58.340
<v Speaker 2>and Someone caught her on camera pretty much telling someone

0:11:58.480 --> 0:12:01.280
<v Speaker 2>of color to go back to their country. And then

0:12:01.300 --> 0:12:03.180
<v Speaker 2>the person zoomed in and when she realized that she

0:12:03.230 --> 0:12:06.110
<v Speaker 2>got caught and she was on camera, baby, they lit

0:12:06.150 --> 0:12:09.270
<v Speaker 2>that girl up in the comments. Her address, phone number,

0:12:09.370 --> 0:12:11.540
<v Speaker 2>everything was out there because people are not having it.

0:12:11.850 --> 0:12:12.370
<v Speaker 4>And yeah.

0:12:12.410 --> 0:12:14.150
<v Speaker 2>They're like, that's what you want to do? Okay, let's

0:12:14.170 --> 0:12:15.319
<v Speaker 2>stand on this business right here.

0:12:15.380 --> 0:12:15.820
<v Speaker 1>Great.

0:12:16.600 --> 0:12:18.260
<v Speaker 3>They said she was an aspiring nurse.

0:12:18.480 --> 0:12:19.300
<v Speaker 2>Yep, I saw that too.

0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:23.280
<v Speaker 3>Racist white woman to nurse pipeline is very strong. Baby.

0:12:23.300 --> 0:12:23.420
<v Speaker 2>Baby.

0:12:23.830 --> 0:12:27.030
<v Speaker 1>Bro, it's crazy that so many of these racist people

0:12:27.530 --> 0:12:30.819
<v Speaker 1>have these jobs caring for people. And then you wonder

0:12:30.860 --> 0:12:34.600
<v Speaker 1>why the infant mortality rate or the black maternal health

0:12:34.679 --> 0:12:37.420
<v Speaker 1>rate is so high. Because the people who are supposed

0:12:37.440 --> 0:12:40.020
<v Speaker 1>to be caring for them don't like them.

0:12:40.160 --> 0:12:40.980
<v Speaker 4>Right, right.

0:12:41.000 --> 0:12:41.280
<v Speaker 1>It's crazy.

0:12:41.300 --> 0:12:42.600
<v Speaker 2>And if you go to a practice and you're looking

0:12:42.640 --> 0:12:44.080
<v Speaker 2>for someone that looks like you.

0:12:44.100 --> 0:12:44.860
<v Speaker 4>Right.

0:12:45.480 --> 0:12:47.360
<v Speaker 2>You know, some people might be like, oh, well, you know,

0:12:47.380 --> 0:12:49.840
<v Speaker 2>why is she biased? Yeah, I'd rather take my chances

0:12:49.860 --> 0:12:50.660
<v Speaker 2>with somebody who looks like me.

0:12:51.360 --> 0:12:54.100
<v Speaker 1>I mean, at this point in 2026, right, can you

0:12:54.140 --> 0:12:56.939
<v Speaker 1>be upset at someone, a person of color, particularly a

0:12:56.980 --> 0:12:59.059
<v Speaker 1>black person who says, I'd rather just go to a

0:12:59.120 --> 0:13:01.880
<v Speaker 1>black person for these things? When you look at all

0:13:01.920 --> 0:13:03.720
<v Speaker 1>of the research that's come out, now the proof that's

0:13:03.740 --> 0:13:06.100
<v Speaker 1>coming out, one thing social media has done is highlighted

0:13:06.740 --> 0:13:09.100
<v Speaker 1>a lot of these things. Can you really be upset

0:13:09.140 --> 0:13:10.620
<v Speaker 1>at someone for choosing to do that?

0:13:10.679 --> 0:13:11.610
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely not.

0:13:11.870 --> 0:13:14.850
<v Speaker 1>I'm not. I'm not upset at anyone. I'm not upset

0:13:14.870 --> 0:13:16.150
<v Speaker 1>if a white person wants to go to a white person.

0:13:17.590 --> 0:13:19.230
<v Speaker 1>I'm not upset at that. But you're not going to

0:13:19.270 --> 0:13:21.829
<v Speaker 1>gaslight me into thinking that everyone is always treated equal

0:13:21.870 --> 0:13:22.330
<v Speaker 1>all the time.

0:13:22.370 --> 0:13:22.610
<v Speaker 2>Right.

0:13:22.770 --> 0:13:23.250
<v Speaker 1>Correct.

0:13:23.330 --> 0:13:26.730
<v Speaker 3>Not at all. And speaking of people not being treated

0:13:26.770 --> 0:13:30.390
<v Speaker 3>equal all the time, I read about another crime. And

0:13:30.429 --> 0:13:34.980
<v Speaker 3>this is some shit I would do, honestly. This 23-year-old

0:13:35.080 --> 0:13:38.920
<v Speaker 3>lady in Milwaukee went to a high school. It's actually

0:13:38.960 --> 0:13:42.710
<v Speaker 3>her old high school. and posed as a substitute teacher

0:13:43.010 --> 0:13:45.750
<v Speaker 3>so that she could just roast kids in the classroom.

0:13:46.550 --> 0:13:50.550
<v Speaker 3>She got away doing it for three whole periods before

0:13:50.570 --> 0:13:53.380
<v Speaker 3>they caught her. They caught her because the kids were salty.

0:13:53.410 --> 0:13:56.320
<v Speaker 3>They started recording her and telling. They went and told

0:13:56.340 --> 0:14:01.100
<v Speaker 3>the administrators, like, she called somebody fat boy. She told

0:14:01.160 --> 0:14:03.420
<v Speaker 3>these white boys they look like school shooters.

0:14:04.000 --> 0:14:05.500
<v Speaker 1>Oh, my God.

0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:07.350
<v Speaker 3>When they asked her why she do it, she said

0:14:07.370 --> 0:14:10.690
<v Speaker 3>because she was bored and she hates kids. That is

0:14:10.710 --> 0:14:13.110
<v Speaker 3>something you would ask. She's smiling in her mugshot.

0:14:13.130 --> 0:14:13.610
<v Speaker 4>Was that you?

0:14:14.130 --> 0:14:15.750
<v Speaker 3>Trimble, tell us the truth.

0:14:15.770 --> 0:14:16.550
<v Speaker 1>Come on, Trimble.

0:14:16.580 --> 0:14:20.620
<v Speaker 2>Was your hair braided or was it done braided?

0:14:21.340 --> 0:14:24.440
<v Speaker 3>I'm too scared to go to jail, but that sounds

0:14:24.520 --> 0:14:24.880
<v Speaker 3>fun to me.

0:14:24.880 --> 0:14:26.680
<v Speaker 4>But she runs away from the cops at the same time.

0:14:26.840 --> 0:14:28.420
<v Speaker 3>I think she was a little crazy, though. I think

0:14:28.470 --> 0:14:32.070
<v Speaker 3>she probably- A little crazy? I think she was under psychosis.

0:14:32.190 --> 0:14:34.310
<v Speaker 1>I can't condone that behavior, but I did go back

0:14:34.330 --> 0:14:35.830
<v Speaker 1>to my middle school and roasted Mr.

0:14:35.870 --> 0:14:38.520
<v Speaker 3>Fast. Oh, finally.

0:14:38.540 --> 0:14:41.350
<v Speaker 1>And I roasted him in front of the whole class.

0:14:42.170 --> 0:14:45.350
<v Speaker 2>Was this a follow-up to the Lucky Bucks story? Yeah, Mr.

0:14:45.370 --> 0:14:48.229
<v Speaker 1>Lucky Bucks. I went back. Remember, I went back in 2000.

0:14:48.210 --> 0:14:51.290
<v Speaker 1>When did we come back from Michigan? 2007 when I

0:14:51.310 --> 0:14:53.310
<v Speaker 1>was in NFL? Went back to Huddy.

0:14:53.410 --> 0:14:53.490
<v Speaker 2>Mr.

0:14:53.550 --> 0:14:55.910
<v Speaker 1>Harrington asked me if I would come talk to the kids.

0:14:56.110 --> 0:14:57.430
<v Speaker 2>Was your jersey retired or something there?

0:14:57.830 --> 0:15:00.510
<v Speaker 1>No, my jersey was retired in Madison. It was that

0:15:00.570 --> 0:15:02.030
<v Speaker 1>same time I went back to Huddy.

0:15:02.490 --> 0:15:02.690
<v Speaker 6>Mr.

0:15:02.730 --> 0:15:05.990
<v Speaker 1>Harrington asked me to come by. I went by, see Mr. Harrington.

0:15:06.010 --> 0:15:09.860
<v Speaker 1>I was just like, yo. Here goes Mr. Fast. I

0:15:09.890 --> 0:15:12.460
<v Speaker 1>walked into Mr. Fast's class. I was like, hey, Mr. Fast,

0:15:12.500 --> 0:15:15.239
<v Speaker 1>how you doing? You remember me? It's Tavale Ellis. And

0:15:15.320 --> 0:15:18.220
<v Speaker 1>he was just like, yeah, I remember you. And I

0:15:18.240 --> 0:15:21.360
<v Speaker 1>put my arm around him. I said, guys, if you're handsome,

0:15:21.460 --> 0:15:24.380
<v Speaker 1>you get good grades. If the young ladies happen to

0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:26.640
<v Speaker 1>think that you're one of those guys, Mr. Fast might

0:15:26.680 --> 0:15:27.520
<v Speaker 1>fail you on purpose.

0:15:27.600 --> 0:15:29.300
<v Speaker 3>Did it to me.

0:15:29.360 --> 0:15:31.400
<v Speaker 1>Young ladies, watch your bra straps. You might pluck them.

0:15:31.920 --> 0:15:32.740
<v Speaker 1>And I walked out.

0:15:32.880 --> 0:15:33.960
<v Speaker 4>What? Yep.

0:15:35.450 --> 0:15:37.210
<v Speaker 2>And you should have said, man, watch your lucky bucks.

0:15:37.380 --> 0:15:39.210
<v Speaker 1>I forgot about the lucky bucks.

0:15:39.310 --> 0:15:40.830
<v Speaker 6>I was waiting for him to say something about lucky bucks.

0:15:40.870 --> 0:15:44.190
<v Speaker 1>He did not even mention it. Going back to roast him,

0:15:44.290 --> 0:15:46.310
<v Speaker 1>I'll do that. I will also say this. Some of

0:15:46.330 --> 0:15:49.710
<v Speaker 1>these kids nowadays do need to be roasted by teachers.

0:15:49.870 --> 0:15:50.530
<v Speaker 3>Absolutely.

0:15:50.630 --> 0:15:53.370
<v Speaker 1>Because I have friends who are teachers. I have friends

0:15:53.390 --> 0:15:56.170
<v Speaker 1>who are substitutes. I have friends who are football coaches.

0:15:56.790 --> 0:15:57.970
<v Speaker 2>You were a gym teacher at one point.

0:15:57.990 --> 0:15:59.210
<v Speaker 1>I was a gym teacher. You remember what I went

0:15:59.230 --> 0:15:59.610
<v Speaker 1>through with that?

0:15:59.630 --> 0:16:00.870
<v Speaker 2>In the summer, summer school gym teacher. Yeah.

0:16:00.890 --> 0:16:01.130
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:16:01.710 --> 0:16:03.770
<v Speaker 1>Like, a lot of these kids don't have the same

0:16:03.810 --> 0:16:05.070
<v Speaker 1>respect we have for elders.

0:16:05.410 --> 0:16:05.690
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:16:05.870 --> 0:16:07.730
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying? Like, they have no respect.

0:16:07.850 --> 0:16:08.730
<v Speaker 6>I can see that.

0:16:08.960 --> 0:16:11.420
<v Speaker 1>They curse at elders. They do stuff on purpose to

0:16:11.460 --> 0:16:14.020
<v Speaker 1>get a reaction, and they act like victims. A lot

0:16:14.040 --> 0:16:16.600
<v Speaker 1>of these little kids is little mini narcissists. You know

0:16:16.620 --> 0:16:19.400
<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying? And sometimes if they had a substitute

0:16:19.820 --> 0:16:22.440
<v Speaker 1>that hit them with the same energy, they'd be like, oh,

0:16:22.470 --> 0:16:23.910
<v Speaker 1>let me not. Let me not do this.

0:16:23.950 --> 0:16:24.730
<v Speaker 2>Don't mess with that one.

0:16:24.870 --> 0:16:25.750
<v Speaker 3>Yeah. Yeah.

0:16:25.810 --> 0:16:28.650
<v Speaker 1>Because that's what it was in Prototype. Prototype was me

0:16:28.690 --> 0:16:29.250
<v Speaker 1>and my brother.

0:16:29.790 --> 0:16:30.610
<v Speaker 4>It was Alrick.

0:16:31.100 --> 0:16:34.400
<v Speaker 1>And it was dolo. But this is a private little program.

0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:37.830
<v Speaker 1>This is not public school. We told them, you want

0:16:37.850 --> 0:16:40.590
<v Speaker 1>to have jokes? We can have jokes back. You want

0:16:40.610 --> 0:16:42.930
<v Speaker 1>to play practical jokes and pranks? We can prank back.

0:16:43.470 --> 0:16:45.590
<v Speaker 1>So for the first couple months, we was going back

0:16:45.610 --> 0:16:48.150
<v Speaker 1>and forth. The kids ain't like that. And you can't

0:16:48.190 --> 0:16:49.310
<v Speaker 1>tell your mom and dad because your.

0:16:49.230 --> 0:16:51.110
<v Speaker 6>Mom and dad sent you.

0:16:51.190 --> 0:16:51.350
<v Speaker 2>Mr.

0:16:51.430 --> 0:16:53.150
<v Speaker 1>Mary Clarence.

0:16:53.170 --> 0:16:53.410
<v Speaker 2>Mr.

0:16:53.470 --> 0:16:55.850
<v Speaker 3>Mary Clarence is great. Mr.

0:16:55.850 --> 0:16:59.090
<v Speaker 1>Mary Clarence is crazy. But yes, that's what it was like.

0:16:59.130 --> 0:17:01.600
<v Speaker 2>DeVal was that person. Them kids ain't want no smoke

0:17:01.620 --> 0:17:04.900
<v Speaker 2>with you. I promise you. It just wouldn't end well.

0:17:05.000 --> 0:17:06.919
<v Speaker 1>I throw words back. My brother throw hands.

0:17:07.340 --> 0:17:08.080
<v Speaker 4>So it was both.

0:17:08.240 --> 0:17:10.500
<v Speaker 3>The first time I had, we used to go to

0:17:10.540 --> 0:17:13.420
<v Speaker 3>summer camp. We had these two women. They were actually

0:17:13.460 --> 0:17:15.760
<v Speaker 3>both deltas. They're the reason I'm a delta to this day.

0:17:16.240 --> 0:17:18.699
<v Speaker 3>But if you got in trouble, they would just embarrass you.

0:17:18.740 --> 0:17:21.290
<v Speaker 3>That was your punishment. Like one day we weren't supposed

0:17:21.310 --> 0:17:23.990
<v Speaker 3>to be talking. We were in line and this little

0:17:24.010 --> 0:17:27.150
<v Speaker 3>girl was talking. And so we got back to the room.

0:17:27.710 --> 0:17:29.409
<v Speaker 3>Our counselor said, why are you talking? She was like,

0:17:29.890 --> 0:17:31.770
<v Speaker 3>I was saying I need a rubber band. She was like,

0:17:31.790 --> 0:17:33.690
<v Speaker 3>who are you talking to? She was like myself. So

0:17:33.790 --> 0:17:36.790
<v Speaker 3>she was like, so you were saying self, I need

0:17:36.869 --> 0:17:39.350
<v Speaker 3>a rubber band. And she was like, yeah. So she

0:17:39.369 --> 0:17:42.290
<v Speaker 3>was like, stand in the corner and say self, I

0:17:42.330 --> 0:17:44.930
<v Speaker 3>need a rubber band until I say stop.

0:17:45.170 --> 0:17:46.010
<v Speaker 1>That's how we do it.

0:17:46.050 --> 0:17:47.649
<v Speaker 3>She was in the corner saying self, I need a

0:17:47.670 --> 0:17:49.129
<v Speaker 3>rubber band for like an hour.

0:17:49.710 --> 0:17:50.410
<v Speaker 1>That's messed up.

0:17:50.430 --> 0:17:52.230
<v Speaker 4>That's worse than anything I ever get.

0:17:52.550 --> 0:17:53.250
<v Speaker 1>That's messed up.

0:17:53.470 --> 0:17:54.449
<v Speaker 3>We was weak as hell.

0:17:54.490 --> 0:17:57.150
<v Speaker 1>That's why millennials are so mentally tough though. Because we've

0:17:57.190 --> 0:17:58.560
<v Speaker 1>all had to do that. I know y'all had to

0:17:58.580 --> 0:17:59.899
<v Speaker 1>write stuff on a chalkboard before.

0:18:00.020 --> 0:18:01.560
<v Speaker 7>Nah, it's great. We used to have to write in

0:18:01.619 --> 0:18:03.679
<v Speaker 7>our notebook. You had to get the dictionary. So you'd

0:18:03.700 --> 0:18:05.640
<v Speaker 7>be like, all right, you want to mess around?

0:18:05.680 --> 0:18:05.860
<v Speaker 6>Cool.

0:18:05.900 --> 0:18:07.540
<v Speaker 7>You got the letter A today. You're going to write

0:18:07.600 --> 0:18:10.639
<v Speaker 7>every word and definition under the A section.

0:18:10.760 --> 0:18:11.169
<v Speaker 4>Oh, my God.

0:18:11.220 --> 0:18:11.720
<v Speaker 1>I'm crying.

0:18:11.780 --> 0:18:13.000
<v Speaker 6>You add on. We're going to go to B.

0:18:13.020 --> 0:18:14.920
<v Speaker 7>We're going to go to C. You'll do this the

0:18:14.960 --> 0:18:16.790
<v Speaker 7>entire school year. If you keep playing with me.

0:18:17.050 --> 0:18:18.520
<v Speaker 4>Oh my God.

0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:22.899
<v Speaker 1>This would be me as a kid.

0:18:23.320 --> 0:18:25.260
<v Speaker 4>Hit me please.

0:18:25.380 --> 0:18:25.880
<v Speaker 3>A-S-S-H-O-L-E.

0:18:25.920 --> 0:18:28.460
<v Speaker 4>That would be me. Immediately.

0:18:29.240 --> 0:18:30.879
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh. Too funny.

0:18:30.900 --> 0:18:35.270
<v Speaker 2>All right. So, how you feeling?

0:18:35.810 --> 0:18:36.490
<v Speaker 1>How you feeling?

0:18:37.070 --> 0:18:40.330
<v Speaker 2>Baby, let me tell you. It's so layered, right? There's

0:18:40.350 --> 0:18:42.090
<v Speaker 2>so many things that we can discuss with this whole

0:18:42.150 --> 0:18:46.350
<v Speaker 2>energy shift in the house. Um, But I will never

0:18:46.430 --> 0:18:51.210
<v Speaker 2>forget like that first morning where mom still came to

0:18:51.250 --> 0:18:53.530
<v Speaker 2>the house because we have an agreement with mom. You know,

0:18:53.550 --> 0:18:55.869
<v Speaker 2>we have an arrangement, I should say, since she was

0:18:55.910 --> 0:18:57.990
<v Speaker 2>such a vital part of like the boys getting up

0:18:58.030 --> 0:19:00.110
<v Speaker 2>in the morning with me and breakfast and all that

0:19:00.910 --> 0:19:02.790
<v Speaker 2>in order to make sure that even when she's in

0:19:02.850 --> 0:19:05.020
<v Speaker 2>her space, she can still feel included and still be

0:19:05.040 --> 0:19:07.959
<v Speaker 2>a part of like the getting to school process. I

0:19:08.000 --> 0:19:11.160
<v Speaker 2>got the boys ready for school that morning. Mom met

0:19:11.700 --> 0:19:13.220
<v Speaker 2>at the house for the time they were supposed to

0:19:13.260 --> 0:19:15.840
<v Speaker 2>be picked up. She then proceeded to take them to

0:19:15.880 --> 0:19:19.280
<v Speaker 2>school that morning. I was able to like get back

0:19:19.320 --> 0:19:22.180
<v Speaker 2>into bed with you for a little bit and snuggle.

0:19:22.760 --> 0:19:24.879
<v Speaker 2>And I think the first thing we both did was say, listen,

0:19:27.200 --> 0:19:28.040
<v Speaker 2>it was just quiet.

0:19:28.180 --> 0:19:28.560
<v Speaker 6>Quiet.

0:19:29.540 --> 0:19:30.280
<v Speaker 3>It was just quiet.

0:19:31.280 --> 0:19:34.760
<v Speaker 2>And then we walked into the kitchen eventually and I

0:19:34.780 --> 0:19:36.240
<v Speaker 2>made you a cup of tea. I made my cup

0:19:36.280 --> 0:19:36.780
<v Speaker 2>of coffee.

0:19:37.040 --> 0:19:37.300
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:19:37.440 --> 0:19:41.040
<v Speaker 2>Made some breakfast. And we just sat for a minute

0:19:41.100 --> 0:19:41.440
<v Speaker 2>in that.

0:19:41.460 --> 0:19:41.660
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:19:42.619 --> 0:19:44.680
<v Speaker 2>And I think in that moment, we both didn't realize

0:19:44.720 --> 0:19:47.650
<v Speaker 2>how much we needed that. Yeah. For each other.

0:19:47.670 --> 0:19:50.909
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely. We both definitely need that. And I will say

0:19:50.950 --> 0:19:54.210
<v Speaker 1>this though, because we have this arrangement or agreement with

0:19:54.280 --> 0:19:57.200
<v Speaker 1>my mother-in-law, because don't get it twisted. We need my mother-in-law.

0:19:57.359 --> 0:19:59.200
<v Speaker 1>That is a fact. I need my mother-in-law.

0:19:59.380 --> 0:19:59.980
<v Speaker 2>I need her too.

0:20:00.400 --> 0:20:03.560
<v Speaker 1>I need my mother-in-law in part because my wife doesn't

0:20:03.619 --> 0:20:06.180
<v Speaker 1>realize as much as I realize how much my mother-in-law

0:20:06.240 --> 0:20:09.119
<v Speaker 1>does when she can't. Right. So I know that if

0:20:09.180 --> 0:20:10.940
<v Speaker 1>we just say, you know, Mimi, get out of here. Pops,

0:20:10.980 --> 0:20:12.530
<v Speaker 1>get out of here. All of that stuff is going

0:20:12.550 --> 0:20:15.150
<v Speaker 1>to fall on us. And neither one of us have

0:20:15.190 --> 0:20:18.910
<v Speaker 1>the capacity to add anything more to our plate that

0:20:18.990 --> 0:20:23.070
<v Speaker 1>your parents, particularly your mom, does with the kids, with

0:20:23.190 --> 0:20:26.149
<v Speaker 1>folding laundry, with making dinners, with picking them up from practice.

0:20:26.580 --> 0:20:29.120
<v Speaker 1>So I love my mother-in-law. This wasn't a thing where

0:20:29.140 --> 0:20:30.379
<v Speaker 1>it was just like we had to get them out

0:20:30.420 --> 0:20:33.280
<v Speaker 1>of the house. It was also a thing where I

0:20:33.320 --> 0:20:35.640
<v Speaker 1>remember 2003.

0:20:35.970 --> 0:20:36.260
<v Speaker 2>Yes, 2003.

0:20:36.260 --> 0:20:39.800
<v Speaker 1>Okay. We were coming back from, that's Estabrook.

0:20:40.040 --> 0:20:40.260
<v Speaker 6>Yes.

0:20:40.700 --> 0:20:43.020
<v Speaker 1>We went to go visit your mom's friend in Jersey.

0:20:43.140 --> 0:20:43.360
<v Speaker 5>Yes.

0:20:44.500 --> 0:20:47.639
<v Speaker 1>And your mom, her eyes were so big. And there

0:20:47.680 --> 0:20:49.900
<v Speaker 1>was a big house in Jersey. And it was a typical,

0:20:49.940 --> 0:20:52.490
<v Speaker 1>you know, Jersey house, nice backyard, front yard. But living

0:20:52.530 --> 0:20:54.470
<v Speaker 1>in Brooklyn, we grew up with all of our houses connected.

0:20:54.510 --> 0:20:55.030
<v Speaker 2>Connected.

0:20:55.170 --> 0:20:56.530
<v Speaker 1>And you said to me, you know, my mom always

0:20:56.570 --> 0:20:59.190
<v Speaker 1>wanted a house like this where she can invite people over. Yeah.

0:20:59.470 --> 0:21:02.169
<v Speaker 1>I am proud and happy. that we are able to

0:21:02.250 --> 0:21:05.240
<v Speaker 1>watch our parents, and particularly your mom, because it was

0:21:05.260 --> 0:21:08.090
<v Speaker 1>something that she wanted, get what she wanted out of life.

0:21:08.150 --> 0:21:08.870
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, finally.

0:21:08.890 --> 0:21:09.520
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying?

0:21:09.560 --> 0:21:09.730
<v Speaker 4>Right.

0:21:09.760 --> 0:21:12.660
<v Speaker 2>Like it was about her and not about anybody else.

0:21:12.680 --> 0:21:14.880
<v Speaker 2>Because for so many years, she was so used to

0:21:15.280 --> 0:21:17.400
<v Speaker 2>putting what she wanted on the back burner for everything,

0:21:17.520 --> 0:21:20.550
<v Speaker 2>everyone else. And before even my brother, my sister and I,

0:21:20.859 --> 0:21:22.780
<v Speaker 2>she was doing that for her own family. Yeah. Being

0:21:22.800 --> 0:21:25.139
<v Speaker 2>the oldest of six kids, the one that came up first,

0:21:25.480 --> 0:21:28.570
<v Speaker 2>you know, she literally carried her brothers and sisters for

0:21:28.690 --> 0:21:31.550
<v Speaker 2>years before we got here. So in that moment, I

0:21:31.570 --> 0:21:34.510
<v Speaker 2>was just happy that my mom finally had her own space. Yeah.

0:21:35.050 --> 0:21:37.060
<v Speaker 2>that she could just be proud of, you know?

0:21:37.480 --> 0:21:39.940
<v Speaker 1>And think about what that energy shift has done for

0:21:40.020 --> 0:21:43.479
<v Speaker 1>you two. Yeah. Your relationship. Like, I now get to

0:21:43.520 --> 0:21:47.040
<v Speaker 1>watch my mother-in-law be excited about inviting us over, tell

0:21:47.480 --> 0:21:50.320
<v Speaker 1>the grandkids to come over, cooking soup, going over there,

0:21:50.400 --> 0:21:51.680
<v Speaker 1>her bringing the soup over.

0:21:51.740 --> 0:21:55.869
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Sunday dinners, starting new traditions now that her and

0:21:55.890 --> 0:21:58.550
<v Speaker 2>dad have their own place. Like, it's just been really

0:21:58.590 --> 0:22:01.369
<v Speaker 2>nice to see. I'm glad you mentioned her and I

0:22:01.570 --> 0:22:04.520
<v Speaker 2>in our relationship, our dynamic, right? Because prior to mom

0:22:04.560 --> 0:22:07.040
<v Speaker 2>living with me, say when we were in Brooklyn, for example,

0:22:07.260 --> 0:22:09.879
<v Speaker 2>in our apartment in Brooklyn, my mom was still very hands-on.

0:22:09.900 --> 0:22:12.100
<v Speaker 2>I remember her calling me when she was about to

0:22:12.160 --> 0:22:14.340
<v Speaker 2>leave work. Granted, my mom was like, she had a

0:22:14.359 --> 0:22:16.619
<v Speaker 2>full-time job. Sometimes she would work a night job on

0:22:16.640 --> 0:22:19.639
<v Speaker 2>the weekends. She was out there hustling. But she still

0:22:19.880 --> 0:22:22.560
<v Speaker 2>found a way to anticipate our needs. And she would

0:22:22.580 --> 0:22:25.300
<v Speaker 2>call before she left work because her job wasn't too

0:22:25.340 --> 0:22:26.679
<v Speaker 2>far from our house. It was kind of like the

0:22:26.760 --> 0:22:30.390
<v Speaker 2>midway point between our family house and our apartment.

0:22:30.470 --> 0:22:31.630
<v Speaker 1>She was working at King's?

0:22:31.910 --> 0:22:33.650
<v Speaker 2>She was at Susan Smith McKinney.

0:22:33.790 --> 0:22:34.530
<v Speaker 1>McKinney.

0:22:34.570 --> 0:22:34.990
<v Speaker 4>McKinney.

0:22:35.030 --> 0:22:35.630
<v Speaker 1>McKinney, yeah.

0:22:35.730 --> 0:22:38.270
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so she would be there. She would call and say, hey,

0:22:38.730 --> 0:22:40.310
<v Speaker 2>what do you need? Do you need me to swing by?

0:22:40.330 --> 0:22:41.670
<v Speaker 2>Do you want to go to the gym today? Is

0:22:41.690 --> 0:22:44.320
<v Speaker 2>DeVal have a late night? I can come by, do

0:22:44.340 --> 0:22:45.939
<v Speaker 2>the nighttime routine with the kids so you can go

0:22:45.980 --> 0:22:48.060
<v Speaker 2>to the gym, come back. Like she was always been

0:22:48.150 --> 0:22:50.680
<v Speaker 2>invested in whatever it was that we needed to get

0:22:50.720 --> 0:22:51.220
<v Speaker 2>things done.

0:22:51.640 --> 0:22:54.400
<v Speaker 1>And I think that that's, that's the part that people

0:22:54.480 --> 0:22:56.780
<v Speaker 1>didn't know prior to Mimi moving in.

0:22:56.920 --> 0:22:57.120
<v Speaker 3>Yes.

0:22:57.220 --> 0:23:00.899
<v Speaker 1>It was like, why was Mimi moving in so important? Well,

0:23:00.920 --> 0:23:03.520
<v Speaker 1>it was important because when we were living in the apartment,

0:23:03.770 --> 0:23:07.570
<v Speaker 1>When I had auditions, I was either dropping Jackson off

0:23:07.650 --> 0:23:10.949
<v Speaker 1>to your dad or your mother was coming over and

0:23:11.050 --> 0:23:13.470
<v Speaker 1>watching them while I ran to an audition and came back.

0:23:13.550 --> 0:23:15.990
<v Speaker 1>So her stepping in had become part of our life

0:23:16.080 --> 0:23:19.020
<v Speaker 1>prior to us moving to L.A. Imagine if we didn't

0:23:19.060 --> 0:23:20.700
<v Speaker 1>have your mom moving to L.A.

0:23:20.760 --> 0:23:21.180
<v Speaker 3>Oh, my goodness.

0:23:21.200 --> 0:23:22.800
<v Speaker 2>That was a given. I think that's why we felt

0:23:23.119 --> 0:23:25.380
<v Speaker 2>we had the latitude to be able to move. It's like,

0:23:25.680 --> 0:23:27.340
<v Speaker 2>all right, mom, you have a stressful job. You had

0:23:27.359 --> 0:23:29.040
<v Speaker 2>a heart attack. You need a break. You need a break.

0:23:29.080 --> 0:23:32.250
<v Speaker 2>Clearly help us transition to California. And then that way.

0:23:32.640 --> 0:23:35.859
<v Speaker 2>were able to maneuver, and then eventually we came to Georgia. Now,

0:23:35.900 --> 0:23:37.510
<v Speaker 2>what I will say they got kind of lost in

0:23:37.530 --> 0:23:41.490
<v Speaker 2>the shuffle was her and my relationship because I was

0:23:41.550 --> 0:23:44.409
<v Speaker 2>accustomed to being able to say, oh, mom, let's go

0:23:44.470 --> 0:23:47.460
<v Speaker 2>peruse the mall and window shop or let's go to

0:23:47.540 --> 0:23:49.859
<v Speaker 2>TJ Maxx and we'll just see what they have on sale.

0:23:50.310 --> 0:23:52.389
<v Speaker 2>There were so many leisure things that we did. At

0:23:52.470 --> 0:23:54.610
<v Speaker 2>one time, she took me on a trip to Vegas

0:23:54.650 --> 0:23:56.389
<v Speaker 2>to go see Celine Dion years prior. I remember I

0:23:56.390 --> 0:23:58.250
<v Speaker 2>bought you a dress. Yeah, yeah, you did buy me.

0:23:58.310 --> 0:24:01.450
<v Speaker 2>I still have that dress. Yeah, I still have that dress.

0:24:01.450 --> 0:24:01.790
<v Speaker 3>2007.

0:24:01.790 --> 0:24:03.520
<v Speaker 2>Man, that was a good quality dress.

0:24:03.680 --> 0:24:03.919
<v Speaker 4>It was.

0:24:03.940 --> 0:24:04.840
<v Speaker 2>You know where you got it from at the time?

0:24:04.859 --> 0:24:06.700
<v Speaker 2>I think it was like Caché. You took me to Caché.

0:24:06.720 --> 0:24:08.580
<v Speaker 2>That was like a real cute little boutique, but it

0:24:08.600 --> 0:24:10.340
<v Speaker 2>was kind of expensive at the time for us.

0:24:10.380 --> 0:24:11.780
<v Speaker 1>This was my second year in the league. This is

0:24:11.820 --> 0:24:13.180
<v Speaker 1>when I was just like, I got you, babe. I

0:24:13.180 --> 0:24:13.680
<v Speaker 1>got you.

0:24:13.700 --> 0:24:14.100
<v Speaker 4>I remember.

0:24:14.119 --> 0:24:14.530
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you did.

0:24:14.540 --> 0:24:14.880
<v Speaker 3>You did.

0:24:14.920 --> 0:24:16.220
<v Speaker 2>And I think the dress was like a $ 300 dress.

0:24:16.260 --> 0:24:18.940
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, oh my God, it's so expensive. Yeah. Baby,

0:24:18.960 --> 0:24:21.310
<v Speaker 2>I used to be in Rainbow and Joyce Leslie without shame.

0:24:21.550 --> 0:24:23.909
<v Speaker 1>It had the ruching in the back of my mouth.

0:24:23.990 --> 0:24:24.330
<v Speaker 3>It did.

0:24:24.390 --> 0:24:25.310
<v Speaker 1>I remember that.

0:24:25.430 --> 0:24:27.710
<v Speaker 4>Yo, you put the dress for you to see.

0:24:28.290 --> 0:24:30.290
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:24:30.330 --> 0:24:32.129
<v Speaker 4>When I was in Vegas, I was like, oh, you

0:24:32.170 --> 0:24:33.730
<v Speaker 4>bought me a dress. I was like, nah, nigga, that

0:24:33.750 --> 0:24:36.840
<v Speaker 4>nigga bought it for him. I'm okay with it, bro.

0:24:37.000 --> 0:24:40.100
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and that dress got some wear. It got some wear.

0:24:40.180 --> 0:24:41.180
<v Speaker 4>For $ 300, it's better.

0:24:42.140 --> 0:24:45.060
<v Speaker 2>That's when things were good quality back then. It could last.

0:24:45.080 --> 0:24:47.480
<v Speaker 2>Built to last. But I'm saying that to say we

0:24:47.520 --> 0:24:49.959
<v Speaker 2>used to do so many fun leisure things together. Like

0:24:50.040 --> 0:24:52.200
<v Speaker 2>we would, you know, go for lunch, whatever it was.

0:24:52.619 --> 0:24:55.860
<v Speaker 2>So I feel like somewhere in the process and just

0:24:55.940 --> 0:24:58.320
<v Speaker 2>having multiple children and you and I hustling, I mean,

0:24:58.359 --> 0:25:01.720
<v Speaker 2>going to different gigs and speaking engagements and podcasts and tours,

0:25:02.700 --> 0:25:07.960
<v Speaker 2>mom and I literally just became almost like co-house managers, essentially.

0:25:08.320 --> 0:25:11.000
<v Speaker 2>You know, like making sure that the kids were in order,

0:25:11.040 --> 0:25:11.770
<v Speaker 2>the house was in order.

0:25:12.070 --> 0:25:15.320
<v Speaker 1>But it's not just the... The responsibilities.

0:25:15.600 --> 0:25:15.800
<v Speaker 5>Mm-hmm.

0:25:16.100 --> 0:25:17.540
<v Speaker 1>Could you live with your mother? Yes or no?

0:25:18.220 --> 0:25:18.460
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:25:18.840 --> 0:25:19.680
<v Speaker 1>Could you live with your mother?

0:25:19.700 --> 0:25:20.380
<v Speaker 3>Mm-mm.

0:25:20.400 --> 0:25:22.000
<v Speaker 1>Could you live with your mother? I could not live

0:25:22.020 --> 0:25:23.119
<v Speaker 1>with my mother. Okay.

0:25:23.260 --> 0:25:23.440
<v Speaker 3>Right?

0:25:23.500 --> 0:25:25.780
<v Speaker 1>And the reason why I'm saying that is because when

0:25:25.800 --> 0:25:27.959
<v Speaker 1>you grow up in a house, and we said this

0:25:28.000 --> 0:25:31.270
<v Speaker 1>on another podcast, your mom is the one responsible for

0:25:31.330 --> 0:25:32.830
<v Speaker 1>making you the best human you can be.

0:25:33.090 --> 0:25:33.290
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:25:33.330 --> 0:25:35.370
<v Speaker 1>So they are the one that's constantly pointing out your

0:25:35.410 --> 0:25:36.490
<v Speaker 1>flaws most of the time.

0:25:36.730 --> 0:25:36.950
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:25:37.090 --> 0:25:40.210
<v Speaker 1>So it becomes a thing. I noticed this at Nana's funeral.

0:25:40.750 --> 0:25:46.030
<v Speaker 1>Every time somebody's mom called their name that person, like, turned, like,

0:25:46.190 --> 0:25:49.210
<v Speaker 1>almost like they had a stroke almost, like, calling me again.

0:25:49.530 --> 0:25:51.700
<v Speaker 1>And it didn't matter. Like, if my mom called my cousin,

0:25:51.740 --> 0:25:53.680
<v Speaker 1>no problem. But if my aunt called my cousin.

0:25:53.720 --> 0:25:57.200
<v Speaker 4>You know what I'm saying? They're like, Mom TSD. Yes.

0:25:57.220 --> 0:26:00.080
<v Speaker 1>It's almost like Mom TSD. And the reason why I'm

0:26:00.100 --> 0:26:04.060
<v Speaker 1>bringing that up is because it is unfair because I

0:26:04.100 --> 0:26:06.310
<v Speaker 1>love your mom to be here to ask you to

0:26:06.369 --> 0:26:09.429
<v Speaker 1>live in a house with your mom for seven years.

0:26:09.570 --> 0:26:09.889
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:26:10.250 --> 0:26:10.390
<v Speaker 6>So.

0:26:11.000 --> 0:26:12.280
<v Speaker 1>I wanted to bring all that up. It's like, yeah,

0:26:12.320 --> 0:26:13.939
<v Speaker 1>we're doing a lot of house things together, but it's

0:26:13.960 --> 0:26:17.120
<v Speaker 1>just unfair to have to live with your mom for

0:26:17.160 --> 0:26:18.379
<v Speaker 1>seven years as a grown adult.

0:26:18.400 --> 0:26:18.600
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:26:18.740 --> 0:26:20.419
<v Speaker 1>Because she's still going to be your mom.

0:26:20.600 --> 0:26:20.800
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:26:20.940 --> 0:26:23.800
<v Speaker 1>She's, you know, she's my mother-in-law. She gives me leeway.

0:26:23.920 --> 0:26:24.160
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:26:24.220 --> 0:26:26.840
<v Speaker 1>Your mother don't give you leeway the same way she,

0:26:26.880 --> 0:26:28.220
<v Speaker 1>my mother don't give me leeway.

0:26:28.300 --> 0:26:28.800
<v Speaker 2>That's true.

0:26:28.880 --> 0:26:29.440
<v Speaker 1>That is true.

0:26:29.460 --> 0:26:31.320
<v Speaker 2>That's actually a good, a good point.

0:26:31.359 --> 0:26:32.280
<v Speaker 4>I just changed my answer.

0:26:32.340 --> 0:26:32.800
<v Speaker 6>I'm sorry.

0:26:32.940 --> 0:26:33.359
<v Speaker 4>You got MTSD?

0:26:36.960 --> 0:26:38.639
<v Speaker 1>But we all do. And I don't think it's a

0:26:38.680 --> 0:26:41.280
<v Speaker 1>bad thing. Right, right. We talked about trying to not

0:26:41.340 --> 0:26:42.899
<v Speaker 1>give the boys MTSD.

0:26:42.980 --> 0:26:44.899
<v Speaker 2>I really try to find ways to maneuver like the

0:26:44.940 --> 0:26:46.460
<v Speaker 2>way I tell them and the way I engage and

0:26:46.480 --> 0:26:49.170
<v Speaker 2>interact with them so that they don't feel like every

0:26:49.210 --> 0:26:50.669
<v Speaker 2>time I go to call their name, it's because I'm

0:26:50.710 --> 0:26:51.710
<v Speaker 2>having them do something.

0:26:51.790 --> 0:26:52.210
<v Speaker 3>You know what I mean?

0:26:52.230 --> 0:26:53.110
<v Speaker 2>I try to find the balance.

0:26:53.270 --> 0:26:53.969
<v Speaker 1>Now check this out.

0:26:53.990 --> 0:26:54.330
<v Speaker 3>For sure.

0:26:54.350 --> 0:26:59.140
<v Speaker 1>We got MTSD. PTSD comes from POPs. Because I know

0:26:59.160 --> 0:27:01.159
<v Speaker 1>for a fact my boys could not live with me

0:27:01.200 --> 0:27:03.440
<v Speaker 1>when they get older. I cannot live with my father.

0:27:03.460 --> 0:27:05.850
<v Speaker 1>I don't think any of y'all could live with y'all father.

0:27:05.869 --> 0:27:07.629
<v Speaker 4>I don't know. I don't think my daughter want to

0:27:07.650 --> 0:27:08.330
<v Speaker 4>live with me now.

0:27:11.550 --> 0:27:12.930
<v Speaker 1>Jackson over me too, bro.

0:27:13.070 --> 0:27:13.670
<v Speaker 2>Oh my goodness.

0:27:13.690 --> 0:27:15.870
<v Speaker 1>Jackson is over me because I'm that father that always

0:27:15.890 --> 0:27:16.290
<v Speaker 1>wants to make sure.

0:27:16.310 --> 0:27:18.350
<v Speaker 4>You constantly pointing stuff out. Yeah. Trying to make them

0:27:18.369 --> 0:27:18.850
<v Speaker 4>very human.

0:27:18.869 --> 0:27:19.609
<v Speaker 6>Literally.

0:27:19.630 --> 0:27:23.250
<v Speaker 2>You can foresee everything. You can foresee everything. But saying

0:27:23.270 --> 0:27:26.790
<v Speaker 2>that to say house managing, that had become what our

0:27:26.830 --> 0:27:31.270
<v Speaker 2>relationship was like the foundation of it. And I just

0:27:31.330 --> 0:27:33.810
<v Speaker 2>feel like I wanted to get back to those moments

0:27:33.890 --> 0:27:36.649
<v Speaker 2>where we just did things for fun. And sometimes it's like,

0:27:36.670 --> 0:27:38.629
<v Speaker 2>you know, absent makes the heart grow fonder. That's what

0:27:38.650 --> 0:27:41.600
<v Speaker 2>they say. It having had the space for the past three,

0:27:41.640 --> 0:27:44.580
<v Speaker 2>almost four weeks has been kind of nice because guess what?

0:27:45.200 --> 0:27:47.600
<v Speaker 2>I'm in the house. Deval and I have our alone

0:27:47.640 --> 0:27:50.580
<v Speaker 2>time that we so desperately needed. The children are at

0:27:50.640 --> 0:27:53.290
<v Speaker 2>school and then mom may pick the kids up and

0:27:53.330 --> 0:27:55.570
<v Speaker 2>take them to her house. Then that gives me time

0:27:55.590 --> 0:27:57.209
<v Speaker 2>to sort things out, make dinner. And then I go

0:27:57.250 --> 0:28:00.070
<v Speaker 2>to mom and dad's house and guess what? Mom, hey,

0:28:00.090 --> 0:28:00.649
<v Speaker 2>what's up, girl?

0:28:00.690 --> 0:28:01.129
<v Speaker 6>All good.

0:28:01.150 --> 0:28:02.230
<v Speaker 2>Hugs, kisses.

0:28:02.490 --> 0:28:02.820
<v Speaker 3>What's up?

0:28:03.130 --> 0:28:05.600
<v Speaker 2>Fill me in on like, what's the day? What happened?

0:28:05.619 --> 0:28:07.739
<v Speaker 2>You know, where'd you shop? What'd you find? It's just

0:28:07.760 --> 0:28:11.540
<v Speaker 2>been such a different dynamic to our relationship now, which

0:28:11.600 --> 0:28:14.720
<v Speaker 2>is more reminiscent of when I was younger and I

0:28:14.740 --> 0:28:16.640
<v Speaker 2>looked at my mom like, oh my God, like she's

0:28:16.660 --> 0:28:19.340
<v Speaker 2>so fun. Like I missed that component with her.

0:28:19.500 --> 0:28:22.479
<v Speaker 1>That's why my soundbite was that time and space could

0:28:22.500 --> 0:28:24.040
<v Speaker 1>change the energy in your family.

0:28:24.280 --> 0:28:24.520
<v Speaker 4>Yes.

0:28:24.900 --> 0:28:25.420
<v Speaker 2>And in your house.

0:28:25.480 --> 0:28:28.320
<v Speaker 1>In your house, because shout out to Tribble. She got

0:28:28.359 --> 0:28:32.159
<v Speaker 1>the facts and stats. Multigenerational living is becoming more common

0:28:32.180 --> 0:28:36.399
<v Speaker 1>in America. According to Pew Research's 2026 report, 22 percent

0:28:36.420 --> 0:28:40.810
<v Speaker 1>of Americans lived in multigenerational households in 2024 compared to

0:28:40.850 --> 0:28:46.070
<v Speaker 1>just 13 percent in 1970. The trend is especially pronounced, no,

0:28:46.550 --> 0:28:51.090
<v Speaker 1>especially pronounced among communities of color. 29% of black Americans, 30%

0:28:51.090 --> 0:28:53.790
<v Speaker 1>of Hispanic Americans, and 30% of Asian Americans live in

0:28:53.830 --> 0:28:58.140
<v Speaker 1>multi-generational households compared with 16% of white Americans. Part of

0:28:58.160 --> 0:28:59.560
<v Speaker 1>the reason, of course, is affordability.

0:28:59.880 --> 0:29:00.060
<v Speaker 6>Yes.

0:29:00.160 --> 0:29:02.880
<v Speaker 1>Right? You don't come from generational wealth. Your opportunity to

0:29:02.920 --> 0:29:04.780
<v Speaker 1>go out there and get your own house is less likely.

0:29:04.860 --> 0:29:06.780
<v Speaker 1>So you have more people of color in this country

0:29:07.200 --> 0:29:08.360
<v Speaker 1>living with their parents.

0:29:08.500 --> 0:29:08.680
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:29:08.880 --> 0:29:11.090
<v Speaker 1>What that made me think of was this. if we

0:29:11.170 --> 0:29:13.630
<v Speaker 1>understand the struggles of living with our parents, but now

0:29:13.670 --> 0:29:15.890
<v Speaker 1>we're the first generation that also lives with our parents

0:29:16.030 --> 0:29:19.610
<v Speaker 1>and our kids, how many couples are struggling within their

0:29:19.650 --> 0:29:23.620
<v Speaker 1>relationship trying to balance the financial disparities that are coming

0:29:24.120 --> 0:29:26.180
<v Speaker 1>to us now, like in 2026? Right.

0:29:26.220 --> 0:29:28.520
<v Speaker 2>Well, having a bigger household to sustain, right?

0:29:28.780 --> 0:29:29.020
<v Speaker 1>Right.

0:29:29.080 --> 0:29:31.420
<v Speaker 2>That's the first thing. I also did see that most

0:29:31.460 --> 0:29:34.950
<v Speaker 2>people are not actually choosing to split up. They're trying

0:29:35.010 --> 0:29:38.030
<v Speaker 2>to condense families. Some things are generational and cultural too.

0:29:38.070 --> 0:29:41.270
<v Speaker 2>Like there's certain cultures where it's, it's customary for the

0:29:41.310 --> 0:29:45.670
<v Speaker 2>parents to move in and everyone coexists together. But man,

0:29:45.710 --> 0:29:47.410
<v Speaker 2>the space has been, has been nice.

0:29:47.740 --> 0:29:51.920
<v Speaker 1>I understand the value of multi-generational living. Remember we met,

0:29:52.840 --> 0:29:54.300
<v Speaker 1>there was a med spa we were doing with this

0:29:54.380 --> 0:29:55.740
<v Speaker 1>Indian family.

0:29:55.780 --> 0:29:56.040
<v Speaker 4>Yes.

0:29:56.520 --> 0:29:59.080
<v Speaker 1>And the brother was running the med spa and he

0:29:59.100 --> 0:30:01.500
<v Speaker 1>was like, yeah, I moved back in with my parents.

0:30:01.700 --> 0:30:03.660
<v Speaker 1>They're trying to find a home for my sister. She

0:30:03.680 --> 0:30:05.900
<v Speaker 1>gets married. But I moved back in with my wife

0:30:05.960 --> 0:30:08.830
<v Speaker 1>and kids to help my parents, but also save money.

0:30:08.850 --> 0:30:11.810
<v Speaker 1>I think his father invented the MRI machine. They were

0:30:11.850 --> 0:30:15.510
<v Speaker 1>worth like $ 500 million. And they still were living with

0:30:15.550 --> 0:30:18.990
<v Speaker 1>their parents because financially it just made sense. I have

0:30:19.030 --> 0:30:21.130
<v Speaker 1>this home that my parents can't take care of. I'm

0:30:21.170 --> 0:30:23.530
<v Speaker 1>inheriting it. Now my kids can grow up in the

0:30:23.550 --> 0:30:26.510
<v Speaker 1>same home and I can help my parents. To me,

0:30:26.830 --> 0:30:29.030
<v Speaker 1>I see so much value in that. I see value

0:30:29.050 --> 0:30:31.070
<v Speaker 1>in that. We were able to do that. My brother

0:30:31.110 --> 0:30:33.580
<v Speaker 1>and I were able to save money. My sister now

0:30:33.650 --> 0:30:35.680
<v Speaker 1>is living in my parents' house because we were able

0:30:35.700 --> 0:30:38.140
<v Speaker 1>to get my parents to move down here. But being

0:30:38.200 --> 0:30:41.060
<v Speaker 1>able to find a home that a child or an

0:30:41.340 --> 0:30:43.300
<v Speaker 1>aunt or somebody can move into to save money to

0:30:43.340 --> 0:30:47.000
<v Speaker 1>keep the family's wealth together is important in 2026.

0:30:47.000 --> 0:30:49.060
<v Speaker 2>We did that moving into Nanny's apartment.

0:30:49.200 --> 0:30:49.720
<v Speaker 3>Absolutely.

0:30:49.900 --> 0:30:51.910
<v Speaker 1>Took over that apartment. It was rent controlled. We got

0:30:51.950 --> 0:30:55.350
<v Speaker 1>over that apartment for $ 900. Wow. Nine hundred dollars. It

0:30:55.370 --> 0:30:57.410
<v Speaker 1>was a three bedroom. I think it's about fourteen hundred

0:30:57.430 --> 0:30:57.930
<v Speaker 1>square feet.

0:30:58.130 --> 0:30:58.930
<v Speaker 2>Way back then.

0:30:59.190 --> 0:30:59.410
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:30:59.470 --> 0:31:00.930
<v Speaker 2>I mean, three bedrooms, two bathrooms.

0:31:01.760 --> 0:31:03.640
<v Speaker 1>Every room had a window, which you don't see. There

0:31:03.660 --> 0:31:06.100
<v Speaker 1>was a foyer, a living room, a dining room. I mean,

0:31:06.140 --> 0:31:07.640
<v Speaker 1>it was a treasure to be able to have that.

0:31:08.080 --> 0:31:09.860
<v Speaker 1>But I want to say all of that to also

0:31:09.900 --> 0:31:12.740
<v Speaker 1>say this. There is also a duality and that the

0:31:12.800 --> 0:31:15.030
<v Speaker 1>person you are trying to build a life with, you

0:31:15.150 --> 0:31:17.469
<v Speaker 1>two need each other and you need to have each

0:31:17.550 --> 0:31:20.250
<v Speaker 1>other outside of the scope of taking care of the

0:31:20.290 --> 0:31:21.250
<v Speaker 1>parents and the kids.

0:31:21.330 --> 0:31:21.690
<v Speaker 3>Correct.

0:31:21.750 --> 0:31:23.959
<v Speaker 1>And for the past seven years, you and I have

0:31:23.980 --> 0:31:26.270
<v Speaker 1>been dealing with that. Not realizing that we were dealing

0:31:26.310 --> 0:31:27.190
<v Speaker 1>with it in real time.

0:31:27.250 --> 0:31:27.670
<v Speaker 2>Oh, for sure.

0:31:27.690 --> 0:31:31.330
<v Speaker 1>But this break away from everybody made us realize... how

0:31:31.390 --> 0:31:33.709
<v Speaker 1>much we did do and how important it was, but

0:31:33.750 --> 0:31:35.150
<v Speaker 1>how much I missed my partner.

0:31:35.290 --> 0:31:35.710
<v Speaker 2>Oh my goodness.

0:31:35.730 --> 0:31:36.280
<v Speaker 6>You know what I'm saying?

0:31:36.340 --> 0:31:38.060
<v Speaker 2>And Deval and I have had several moments where we

0:31:38.100 --> 0:31:39.900
<v Speaker 2>laughed to each other and we were like, it wasn't

0:31:40.000 --> 0:31:41.040
<v Speaker 2>us the whole time.

0:31:41.840 --> 0:31:42.540
<v Speaker 4>The whole time.

0:31:42.560 --> 0:31:45.140
<v Speaker 2>So many moments Deval and I were like either bickering

0:31:45.180 --> 0:31:47.920
<v Speaker 2>about something or frustrated or I'm tired. And he's like,

0:31:47.960 --> 0:31:49.580
<v Speaker 2>you don't see me. And I'm like, you don't see me.

0:31:50.340 --> 0:31:52.060
<v Speaker 2>And I'm just like, bro, I can't see you because

0:31:52.080 --> 0:31:54.219
<v Speaker 2>there's too many people heads in the way. Like we

0:31:54.260 --> 0:31:56.700
<v Speaker 2>can't see each other in those moments. And it's been

0:31:56.740 --> 0:31:57.700
<v Speaker 2>night and day for us.

0:31:57.940 --> 0:32:01.480
<v Speaker 1>Perfect example. Affection, right? I'm like, yo, my wife's not affectionate.

0:32:02.580 --> 0:32:03.959
<v Speaker 1>She's like, what you mean I'm not affectionate? I'm like,

0:32:03.980 --> 0:32:06.229
<v Speaker 1>you're just not affectionate. You're not an affectionate person. I'm

0:32:06.310 --> 0:32:08.270
<v Speaker 1>also not realizing that every time we stepped out of

0:32:08.370 --> 0:32:11.370
<v Speaker 1>our master bedroom, her mom was there. Her dad was

0:32:11.410 --> 0:32:14.090
<v Speaker 1>in the family room. So I would come out. She

0:32:14.130 --> 0:32:16.150
<v Speaker 1>would already be prepared about what the kids have to do.

0:32:16.210 --> 0:32:20.160
<v Speaker 1>We're crossing like ships in the night. And then as

0:32:20.200 --> 0:32:22.680
<v Speaker 1>soon as her parents get their house and my parents

0:32:22.720 --> 0:32:25.060
<v Speaker 1>got their house and the kids are somewhere, my wife

0:32:25.080 --> 0:32:27.820
<v Speaker 1>just jumps on me in the couch. She's just laying

0:32:27.900 --> 0:32:30.120
<v Speaker 1>on me and just sitting there. And I'm like, where

0:32:30.140 --> 0:32:32.020
<v Speaker 1>was this affection for and then I'm like oh shoot

0:32:32.080 --> 0:32:34.200
<v Speaker 1>you couldn't do this your dad was here.

0:32:33.960 --> 0:32:35.820
<v Speaker 2>Yeah or like I'm in the kitchen or whatever and

0:32:35.840 --> 0:32:37.310
<v Speaker 2>it's just like if we're having a moment my mom

0:32:37.330 --> 0:32:38.750
<v Speaker 2>would walk in and she'd be like I see you

0:32:38.790 --> 0:32:42.130
<v Speaker 2>guys and it's just like and she's being playful she

0:32:42.170 --> 0:32:43.830
<v Speaker 2>doesn't mean any harm by it but it's also just

0:32:43.870 --> 0:32:46.030
<v Speaker 2>like you know my man is like grabbing my ass

0:32:46.050 --> 0:32:47.890
<v Speaker 2>and it's like finger like all underneath my cuff and

0:32:47.910 --> 0:32:49.560
<v Speaker 2>I'm like how am I supposed to react when my

0:32:49.600 --> 0:32:50.800
<v Speaker 2>mother walking in.

0:32:50.940 --> 0:32:54.140
<v Speaker 4>It's awkward it's awkward Playing with his belly button. Like,

0:32:54.240 --> 0:32:54.700
<v Speaker 4>why would you?

0:32:54.760 --> 0:32:56.820
<v Speaker 1>Who would like that? Right.

0:32:56.840 --> 0:32:57.340
<v Speaker 3>Bro.

0:32:57.700 --> 0:32:59.980
<v Speaker 2>You know, so we didn't realize how invasive it was, too,

0:33:00.000 --> 0:33:03.459
<v Speaker 2>at the same time. And then we found ourselves also having, like,

0:33:03.500 --> 0:33:06.020
<v Speaker 2>for example, our date nights, trying to reinstate those, you know,

0:33:06.040 --> 0:33:08.180
<v Speaker 2>for a sense of normalcy because things have been so crazy.

0:33:08.640 --> 0:33:10.560
<v Speaker 2>And it's always me trying to have to curate something

0:33:10.640 --> 0:33:11.400
<v Speaker 2>outside of the house.

0:33:11.420 --> 0:33:12.260
<v Speaker 1>Which costs money.

0:33:12.420 --> 0:33:14.530
<v Speaker 2>Which costs money. We don't necessarily want to be outside

0:33:14.550 --> 0:33:16.740
<v Speaker 2>in the public. We want just time for each other.

0:33:17.070 --> 0:33:18.680
<v Speaker 2>But I always had to find somewhere to go. So-

0:33:19.490 --> 0:33:22.190
<v Speaker 2>That weekend, for example, like, or now when we have downtime,

0:33:22.230 --> 0:33:24.670
<v Speaker 2>it's like, we can actually enjoy our house. Like, I'm

0:33:24.930 --> 0:33:27.709
<v Speaker 2>sitting over here enjoying my mortgage, right? Because it's like,

0:33:27.770 --> 0:33:29.450
<v Speaker 2>why am I going to pay money to be in

0:33:29.470 --> 0:33:31.959
<v Speaker 2>another space just for privacy? And DeVal used to be like,

0:33:32.000 --> 0:33:33.660
<v Speaker 2>why is it that we have to travel for us

0:33:33.680 --> 0:33:36.260
<v Speaker 2>to get alone time? Well, nigga, where we going to go?

0:33:36.280 --> 0:33:39.160
<v Speaker 2>There's always someone everywhere. He would come down to his

0:33:39.200 --> 0:33:40.960
<v Speaker 2>man cave. My mom is sitting down here watching TV

0:33:41.000 --> 0:33:43.360
<v Speaker 2>sometimes because her TV, the service was bad back there

0:33:43.380 --> 0:33:45.770
<v Speaker 2>at one point. Or it's like, oh, the theater is free,

0:33:45.810 --> 0:33:47.570
<v Speaker 2>but it's also nice outside. Nobody wants to be in

0:33:47.610 --> 0:33:48.750
<v Speaker 2>a dark theater in the middle of the day.

0:33:50.120 --> 0:33:53.020
<v Speaker 1>This is a true story, bro. I got up. I

0:33:53.060 --> 0:33:56.020
<v Speaker 1>came outside. Went to my freaking... As soon as I

0:33:56.060 --> 0:33:58.700
<v Speaker 1>came out to the front, the kids was all upstairs, right?

0:33:59.200 --> 0:34:01.080
<v Speaker 1>So I'm going to go just watch football in the

0:34:01.100 --> 0:34:03.500
<v Speaker 1>freaking family room. I go in the family room. Father's

0:34:03.520 --> 0:34:03.920
<v Speaker 1>down there.

0:34:04.120 --> 0:34:04.800
<v Speaker 2>Watching wrestling.

0:34:04.960 --> 0:34:06.500
<v Speaker 1>I said, fuck it. I'm going to get some food.

0:34:06.580 --> 0:34:08.299
<v Speaker 1>I grab my stuff. I come down here to the

0:34:08.340 --> 0:34:11.120
<v Speaker 1>man cave. Mom's is here. I say, fuck it. I'm

0:34:11.160 --> 0:34:14.319
<v Speaker 1>going to the theater. My dad is in my theater. Say,

0:34:14.380 --> 0:34:15.950
<v Speaker 1>fuck it. I'm going to go down to the boy cave.

0:34:15.989 --> 0:34:18.469
<v Speaker 1>Dakota and Kaz down... I went from here. I walked

0:34:18.510 --> 0:34:21.250
<v Speaker 1>all the way downstairs, walked out to the backyard, walked

0:34:21.330 --> 0:34:22.850
<v Speaker 1>all the way upstairs and just sat on the lawn.

0:34:23.710 --> 0:34:25.660
<v Speaker 2>That's how I started buying the lawn.

0:34:25.800 --> 0:34:27.120
<v Speaker 4>Damn, I can't get nowhere.

0:34:27.160 --> 0:34:29.760
<v Speaker 2>There was like a Cosby show episode like that, right?

0:34:30.160 --> 0:34:30.780
<v Speaker 1>That is crazy.

0:34:30.820 --> 0:34:32.780
<v Speaker 2>It was like literally the second coming of that Cosby

0:34:32.820 --> 0:34:34.620
<v Speaker 2>episode where Cliff was trying to just find peace and

0:34:34.640 --> 0:34:36.030
<v Speaker 2>quiet in his own home and he couldn't.

0:34:36.210 --> 0:34:38.709
<v Speaker 1>Remember I said, yo, this ain't our house.

0:34:39.030 --> 0:34:39.490
<v Speaker 2>Literally.

0:34:39.510 --> 0:34:40.430
<v Speaker 1>This ain't our house.

0:34:40.469 --> 0:34:42.430
<v Speaker 2>I said, we just stay here. I mean, we got

0:34:42.450 --> 0:34:44.190
<v Speaker 2>to stay here. But other than that, I'm like, it's

0:34:44.210 --> 0:34:44.569
<v Speaker 2>they house.

0:34:44.860 --> 0:34:46.060
<v Speaker 1>You want to hear the crazy part, though?

0:34:46.460 --> 0:34:46.680
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:34:46.880 --> 0:34:48.840
<v Speaker 1>If I had to do it all over again, I

0:34:48.880 --> 0:34:50.900
<v Speaker 1>would definitely do it the same way. I look at

0:34:50.960 --> 0:34:53.000
<v Speaker 1>where we are now, what we were able to sustain

0:34:53.060 --> 0:34:56.040
<v Speaker 1>and build. It was a huge sacrifice, but a sacrifice

0:34:56.060 --> 0:34:57.200
<v Speaker 1>that was needed nonetheless.

0:34:57.469 --> 0:34:57.569
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:34:57.590 --> 0:35:00.569
<v Speaker 1>Because now here we are, early 40s. We got our

0:35:00.610 --> 0:35:04.589
<v Speaker 1>parents 20 minutes away, 15 minutes away. They have their

0:35:04.650 --> 0:35:06.850
<v Speaker 1>routines with the kids. The kids get picked up and

0:35:06.910 --> 0:35:10.330
<v Speaker 1>it's like, yo, I'm 42 and I get to have

0:35:10.390 --> 0:35:13.830
<v Speaker 1>my wife on a Saturday just in the backyard. We

0:35:13.870 --> 0:35:16.129
<v Speaker 1>don't got to go to Ibiza. I don't got to

0:35:16.150 --> 0:35:18.730
<v Speaker 1>spend no money to go to Miami. It's like, people

0:35:18.760 --> 0:35:20.609
<v Speaker 1>ask me, what you and Kay do for fun now?

0:35:20.700 --> 0:35:23.279
<v Speaker 1>I said, to be honest, yo, Kay will go buy

0:35:23.320 --> 0:35:27.290
<v Speaker 1>a Delmonico steak, get some potatoes. She'll cut it up.

0:35:27.719 --> 0:35:30.300
<v Speaker 1>I'll grill it. And we'll sit upstairs in that freaking

0:35:30.360 --> 0:35:34.000
<v Speaker 1>room and do nothing. Just enjoy each other. Like, Yeah.

0:35:34.260 --> 0:35:35.439
<v Speaker 1>She be dressed how she dressed.

0:35:35.460 --> 0:35:37.260
<v Speaker 2>Put on music. Just whatever.

0:35:37.280 --> 0:35:37.950
<v Speaker 4>Just do whatever.

0:35:37.989 --> 0:35:40.200
<v Speaker 1>Like, it's like, yo, like, remember you said to me,

0:35:40.210 --> 0:35:41.690
<v Speaker 1>you know what you can start doing? Because now she

0:35:41.730 --> 0:35:43.450
<v Speaker 1>got things for me. So I want you to put

0:35:43.510 --> 0:35:45.270
<v Speaker 1>on jeans and stuff so that, you know, when we

0:35:45.310 --> 0:35:45.910
<v Speaker 1>get down to it.

0:35:45.950 --> 0:35:47.330
<v Speaker 4>I'm requesting jeans?

0:35:47.350 --> 0:35:49.980
<v Speaker 1>Yo, this is the crazy part.

0:35:50.060 --> 0:35:54.920
<v Speaker 2>She... I like the low cut season with the deep waves.

0:35:55.200 --> 0:35:55.879
<v Speaker 3>I asked Josh.

0:35:55.920 --> 0:35:58.319
<v Speaker 1>I was like, you don't want to put like nothing on?

0:35:58.340 --> 0:35:59.029
<v Speaker 1>She was like, no, no, no.

0:35:59.050 --> 0:36:00.850
<v Speaker 2>No, I was like, I want to see some Brooklyn shit.

0:36:00.870 --> 0:36:01.390
<v Speaker 6>Some good shit.

0:36:01.430 --> 0:36:02.149
<v Speaker 1>That's what I want.

0:36:02.190 --> 0:36:03.530
<v Speaker 4>For the Chippendales, Drake.

0:36:03.670 --> 0:36:05.700
<v Speaker 1>Nah, I'm not hoping for Chippendales.

0:36:06.680 --> 0:36:08.180
<v Speaker 4>That's the magic mic.

0:36:08.219 --> 0:36:11.440
<v Speaker 2>Right, with the tassel on the front of the brief.

0:36:11.800 --> 0:36:14.980
<v Speaker 3>That's the magic mic look. And the Tim.

0:36:15.180 --> 0:36:17.640
<v Speaker 1>I swear if y'all came in here on a Saturday, y'all.

0:36:17.520 --> 0:36:18.470
<v Speaker 2>Would be laughing.

0:36:18.590 --> 0:36:19.840
<v Speaker 4>I was like, put your chain on.

0:36:19.850 --> 0:36:20.310
<v Speaker 3>I believe it.

0:36:20.350 --> 0:36:25.489
<v Speaker 4>You can't wear a construction hat on with the overcoat.

0:36:25.530 --> 0:36:26.070
<v Speaker 1>On God.

0:36:26.150 --> 0:36:27.370
<v Speaker 2>That's a good idea. I like that one.

0:36:27.469 --> 0:36:28.170
<v Speaker 4>On God.

0:36:28.310 --> 0:36:29.669
<v Speaker 1>Last week I had a wife beater.

0:36:29.690 --> 0:36:30.730
<v Speaker 3>No drawers. No, no, no.

0:36:30.750 --> 0:36:31.799
<v Speaker 4>I didn't have no drawers on.

0:36:33.900 --> 0:36:35.880
<v Speaker 1>But I had a white beater on with baggy jean

0:36:35.900 --> 0:36:39.140
<v Speaker 1>shorts and my construction Timbs. And I was just walking

0:36:39.180 --> 0:36:40.410
<v Speaker 1>around and she was.

0:36:40.270 --> 0:36:42.840
<v Speaker 4>Like, We're kids.

0:36:42.920 --> 0:36:44.740
<v Speaker 1>We're just grown-ass kids.

0:36:44.760 --> 0:36:48.089
<v Speaker 4>Would you like me to fix your pipes, man? Ain't

0:36:48.130 --> 0:36:49.350
<v Speaker 4>role-playing being at King's Plaza.

0:36:49.370 --> 0:36:50.250
<v Speaker 3>Talk about wrong.

0:36:50.430 --> 0:36:51.010
<v Speaker 4>Right, exactly.

0:36:51.030 --> 0:36:52.810
<v Speaker 1>She got her boy shorts and a crop top just

0:36:52.850 --> 0:36:55.270
<v Speaker 1>bending over for no reason, talking about, I need help.

0:36:55.410 --> 0:36:57.570
<v Speaker 4>Like, this is the things that's happening in this house

0:36:57.680 --> 0:37:00.120
<v Speaker 4>after seven years living with our parents.

0:37:00.200 --> 0:37:02.040
<v Speaker 2>It's so fun. It's such a good time. But that's

0:37:02.100 --> 0:37:03.680
<v Speaker 2>ultimately what we were trying to get back to, is

0:37:03.700 --> 0:37:05.799
<v Speaker 2>just like, where's the fun in all of this, you know? Yeah.

0:37:06.150 --> 0:37:08.010
<v Speaker 2>But everything is meant to happen when it's supposed to happen.

0:37:08.070 --> 0:37:10.530
<v Speaker 2>It could have been sometime last year, but then remember

0:37:10.550 --> 0:37:13.009
<v Speaker 2>everything happened with dad and the stroke and whatnot. So

0:37:13.050 --> 0:37:15.270
<v Speaker 2>it's like things were delayed, but it definitely was not denied.

0:37:15.290 --> 0:37:18.980
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you also don't realize how when other people's energy

0:37:19.020 --> 0:37:22.600
<v Speaker 1>in your home becomes your energy. Like dad is dealing

0:37:22.620 --> 0:37:25.380
<v Speaker 1>with all of the health stuff. Mom is dealing with

0:37:25.400 --> 0:37:27.800
<v Speaker 1>her stuff. So then I walk out of the master

0:37:27.840 --> 0:37:31.000
<v Speaker 1>bedroom one morning and mom is... right there at the

0:37:31.060 --> 0:37:33.080
<v Speaker 1>fireplace and I'm going to come out and I'm like, yo,

0:37:33.100 --> 0:37:35.219
<v Speaker 1>what's the matter? And I'm like, dang, my morning is

0:37:35.460 --> 0:37:38.960
<v Speaker 1>automatically what's going on with my mother-in-law. I don't even

0:37:39.000 --> 0:37:42.400
<v Speaker 1>get a chance to feel myself. And you don't realize

0:37:42.440 --> 0:37:45.180
<v Speaker 1>how that carries around the house if somebody's going through something.

0:37:45.280 --> 0:37:48.319
<v Speaker 2>And you're already outputting before you can even input for

0:37:48.360 --> 0:37:51.520
<v Speaker 2>your own self. It's been quite the thing. Have you

0:37:51.540 --> 0:37:54.620
<v Speaker 2>guys ever had roommates or scenarios or situations where you're

0:37:54.660 --> 0:37:56.540
<v Speaker 2>just like, I can't live with this person right now?

0:37:56.560 --> 0:37:57.020
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, my mother.

0:37:57.380 --> 0:37:57.700
<v Speaker 1>Ha!

0:37:59.120 --> 0:37:59.259
<v Speaker 6>Ha!

0:37:59.760 --> 0:38:00.390
<v Speaker 2>Now Miss Edna.

0:38:00.410 --> 0:38:04.090
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, man, with my sister when we was five. Nah,

0:38:04.250 --> 0:38:08.270
<v Speaker 4>we lived with my... My mother-in-law lived with us for

0:38:08.290 --> 0:38:12.170
<v Speaker 4>a couple years. And at first, I... At first, you're just, like,

0:38:12.330 --> 0:38:14.989
<v Speaker 4>in it. Like, you don't really realize what you're in.

0:38:15.110 --> 0:38:17.550
<v Speaker 2>Was this pre-baby or post-baby?

0:38:18.290 --> 0:38:19.570
<v Speaker 4>This is post-baby.

0:38:19.590 --> 0:38:20.590
<v Speaker 1>She came to help with the baby.

0:38:21.190 --> 0:38:21.590
<v Speaker 6>So.

0:38:21.910 --> 0:38:26.410
<v Speaker 4>No, well, not post-baby. This is, like, probably, like... Victoria's probably, like, four, maybe?

0:38:26.510 --> 0:38:27.489
<v Speaker 1>Okay, okay, yeah.

0:38:28.450 --> 0:38:29.000
<v Speaker 6>So....

0:38:30.130 --> 0:38:34.750
<v Speaker 4>I remember distinctly... I love my mother-in-law. And shout out

0:38:34.770 --> 0:38:37.529
<v Speaker 4>to us. We came out unscathed. I feel like there

0:38:37.550 --> 0:38:40.210
<v Speaker 4>could have been... You guys came out unscathed. I think

0:38:40.239 --> 0:38:44.540
<v Speaker 4>there could have been a huge issue afterwards. People that

0:38:44.580 --> 0:38:47.420
<v Speaker 4>live together and have no business together. Me and Mimi

0:38:47.440 --> 0:38:48.520
<v Speaker 4>got closer because of that.

0:38:48.560 --> 0:38:50.060
<v Speaker 1>So you're right. We came out unscathed.

0:38:51.480 --> 0:38:53.160
<v Speaker 4>I remember for me, I was in the bathroom.

0:38:53.200 --> 0:38:53.880
<v Speaker 1>I took a shower.

0:38:55.780 --> 0:38:59.719
<v Speaker 4>And I'm like, why the hell am I... Why do

0:38:59.739 --> 0:39:02.279
<v Speaker 4>I got to wear the towel to walk out the bathroom?

0:39:02.380 --> 0:39:03.239
<v Speaker 1>It's your house, yeah.

0:39:03.560 --> 0:39:08.049
<v Speaker 4>I was, yo, it was like reality just set in

0:39:08.130 --> 0:39:12.890
<v Speaker 4>on me. And I'm just like, I don't like this anymore, right?

0:39:13.750 --> 0:39:16.410
<v Speaker 4>And I mean, I have to let it out. So

0:39:16.430 --> 0:39:18.610
<v Speaker 4>I went to my wife and I'm just like, and

0:39:18.640 --> 0:39:20.180
<v Speaker 4>my wife used to say to me stuff like, she

0:39:20.200 --> 0:39:23.399
<v Speaker 4>used to say stuff like, you think I could really

0:39:23.460 --> 0:39:27.580
<v Speaker 4>live with my mom? And I would say- Watching y'all? Nah,

0:39:27.600 --> 0:39:28.360
<v Speaker 4>I don't think this is.

0:39:28.380 --> 0:39:28.880
<v Speaker 1>Healthy.

0:39:30.180 --> 0:39:34.020
<v Speaker 4>When we like get our house, your mom probably shouldn't

0:39:34.040 --> 0:39:35.940
<v Speaker 4>be living with us. I didn't mind it because like you,

0:39:36.320 --> 0:39:38.980
<v Speaker 4>you guys had to help. Yeah. And we had to help.

0:39:39.040 --> 0:39:42.259
<v Speaker 4>We had to go fly somewhere. Yes. We didn't have

0:39:42.280 --> 0:39:43.430
<v Speaker 4>to worry about childcare.

0:39:43.469 --> 0:39:44.830
<v Speaker 1>Right, exactly. It's the best thing.

0:39:44.850 --> 0:39:45.250
<v Speaker 2>Such a blessing.

0:39:45.310 --> 0:39:48.040
<v Speaker 4>And you know, like my schedule was like, it's not, It's.

0:39:48.000 --> 0:39:49.660
<v Speaker 2>Not set every week.

0:39:49.680 --> 0:39:53.290
<v Speaker 4>So, like, she was able to, like, navigate with us

0:39:53.390 --> 0:39:56.590
<v Speaker 4>our lives. So it was helpful. But at the same time,

0:39:57.070 --> 0:39:59.310
<v Speaker 4>sometimes you just be like, nah, I'd rather pay a babysitter. Like,

0:39:59.370 --> 0:40:02.140
<v Speaker 4>I can't do this. And it wasn't until I came

0:40:02.200 --> 0:40:04.200
<v Speaker 4>out that bathroom that day, or was about to come

0:40:04.239 --> 0:40:08.219
<v Speaker 4>out the bathroom, and I'm like, like, you just, like,

0:40:08.260 --> 0:40:10.920
<v Speaker 4>take a deep breath. Went to Anika, and I was

0:40:10.940 --> 0:40:11.500
<v Speaker 4>just like, yo.

0:40:13.160 --> 0:40:13.379
<v Speaker 2>Nah.

0:40:13.550 --> 0:40:14.030
<v Speaker 6>This ain't.

0:40:14.500 --> 0:40:17.529
<v Speaker 4>This ain't it. And then she started coming around to

0:40:17.550 --> 0:40:20.009
<v Speaker 4>the fact like, hey, ma, like.

0:40:22.230 --> 0:40:24.629
<v Speaker 1>What you doing? Like, when you get out of here?

0:40:24.650 --> 0:40:25.729
<v Speaker 4>Because it was like no formal.

0:40:25.750 --> 0:40:26.590
<v Speaker 2>What's the plan?

0:40:26.610 --> 0:40:26.690
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:40:26.710 --> 0:40:28.310
<v Speaker 4>There's no formal exit plan.

0:40:28.370 --> 0:40:28.880
<v Speaker 1>Exactly.

0:40:28.890 --> 0:40:29.610
<v Speaker 2>That's literally us.

0:40:29.640 --> 0:40:31.540
<v Speaker 4>We're sort of like coming to this thing. It's like,

0:40:31.600 --> 0:40:33.080
<v Speaker 4>all right, you're going to help us out.

0:40:33.120 --> 0:40:33.339
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:40:33.500 --> 0:40:35.980
<v Speaker 4>You know, and then things got crossed for us. I

0:40:36.000 --> 0:40:38.219
<v Speaker 4>remember my mother was like, she said at the end,

0:40:38.239 --> 0:40:40.759
<v Speaker 4>she was like, you know what, y'all said I could come,

0:40:40.780 --> 0:40:42.609
<v Speaker 4>I could live with y'all. And I was like, no, no,

0:40:42.650 --> 0:40:45.850
<v Speaker 4>I didn't. I might have said you can stay here,

0:40:45.870 --> 0:40:46.410
<v Speaker 4>but I didn't.

0:40:46.250 --> 0:40:47.330
<v Speaker 1>Mean, like, forever.

0:40:47.350 --> 0:40:48.430
<v Speaker 4>Forever. You know what I mean?

0:40:48.489 --> 0:40:49.560
<v Speaker 1>I got caught up the same way, too.

0:40:49.600 --> 0:40:51.279
<v Speaker 2>And I think that that's kind of what happened with us.

0:40:51.320 --> 0:40:55.040
<v Speaker 2>It was initially, like, in my mind, we're transitioning to L.A.

0:40:55.080 --> 0:40:57.219
<v Speaker 2>So I said, Mom, six months to a year. Like,

0:40:57.239 --> 0:41:00.000
<v Speaker 2>just take some time off while we figure out L.A.

0:41:00.020 --> 0:41:01.470
<v Speaker 2>and our bearings. Build a village.

0:41:01.590 --> 0:41:02.450
<v Speaker 4>Get comfortable, though.

0:41:02.489 --> 0:41:05.190
<v Speaker 1>But then COVID hit. And we keep having babies, though.

0:41:05.550 --> 0:41:06.210
<v Speaker 2>We definitely did.

0:41:06.230 --> 0:41:07.770
<v Speaker 1>We kept having kids and kept needing help.

0:41:08.030 --> 0:41:11.390
<v Speaker 4>But COVID was the thing. COVID was a big thing

0:41:11.430 --> 0:41:14.620
<v Speaker 4>because you couldn't... My mother-in-law, she, it was bad. Like,

0:41:15.400 --> 0:41:19.460
<v Speaker 4>she fell, broke her leg in the house. Now she's

0:41:19.480 --> 0:41:21.219
<v Speaker 4>living by herself and, like, we're like, nah, you got

0:41:21.239 --> 0:41:22.100
<v Speaker 4>to stay with us.

0:41:22.160 --> 0:41:23.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because we need to take care of you.

0:41:23.580 --> 0:41:26.410
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, so she, and she nurses, gets better. As soon

0:41:26.450 --> 0:41:30.450
<v Speaker 4>as she gets better, COVID. COVID comes, she's in a, like,

0:41:30.550 --> 0:41:33.300
<v Speaker 4>it's like all this other stuff that compounds on it.

0:41:33.489 --> 0:41:33.649
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:41:33.670 --> 0:41:36.270
<v Speaker 4>So when you don't have that formal, okay, you're going

0:41:36.290 --> 0:41:38.049
<v Speaker 4>to be here and then you're going to exit at

0:41:38.090 --> 0:41:39.020
<v Speaker 4>this particular time.

0:41:39.160 --> 0:41:39.500
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:41:39.660 --> 0:41:41.739
<v Speaker 4>Of course it's going to be crazy and you don't realize, like,

0:41:42.910 --> 0:41:45.310
<v Speaker 4>I think people who have parents that live with them

0:41:45.770 --> 0:41:50.299
<v Speaker 4>need to say early in the process, okay, yeah, I

0:41:50.320 --> 0:41:52.520
<v Speaker 4>think you should stay with us, but we're only going

0:41:52.540 --> 0:41:55.040
<v Speaker 4>to make this like a year or two sort of situation.

0:41:55.100 --> 0:41:55.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's fair.

0:41:55.920 --> 0:41:58.780
<v Speaker 4>And like have guidelines, right? Yeah.

0:41:58.920 --> 0:41:59.739
<v Speaker 2>Expectations are set.

0:42:00.020 --> 0:42:04.730
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, we didn't have any like real boundaries. Like, you

0:42:04.750 --> 0:42:07.410
<v Speaker 4>could chill here, but like... kind of make it so

0:42:07.430 --> 0:42:09.410
<v Speaker 4>scarce like like that sort of thing like we didn't

0:42:09.469 --> 0:42:12.310
<v Speaker 4>have a massive home right we had something where like

0:42:12.350 --> 0:42:15.670
<v Speaker 4>our common areas were common but everybody also want my

0:42:15.710 --> 0:42:17.969
<v Speaker 4>common area i don't want to like yeah watch a

0:42:18.010 --> 0:42:19.969
<v Speaker 4>movie and then look over there you over there on

0:42:20.010 --> 0:42:22.950
<v Speaker 4>a phone like i don't want that to be over

0:42:23.010 --> 0:42:25.049
<v Speaker 4>here i'm gonna be by myself so i think for

0:42:25.110 --> 0:42:28.730
<v Speaker 4>us it was difficult navigating it you're navigating it in

0:42:28.770 --> 0:42:32.129
<v Speaker 4>the process like it's trying to make rules while things

0:42:32.190 --> 0:42:33.850
<v Speaker 4>are going on. It really doesn't work out, but.

0:42:34.090 --> 0:42:35.660
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, yeah. Listen, I don't recommend it, man.

0:42:35.670 --> 0:42:36.150
<v Speaker 2>Totally understandable.

0:42:36.190 --> 0:42:36.450
<v Speaker 1>I don't.

0:42:36.650 --> 0:42:38.110
<v Speaker 2>Totally understandable. Or if it is, it has to be

0:42:38.150 --> 0:42:40.470
<v Speaker 2>something temporary with an expected guideline.

0:42:40.650 --> 0:42:42.660
<v Speaker 1>I think what you did was solve a part of

0:42:42.719 --> 0:42:45.319
<v Speaker 1>the problem. We went into this, too, and never had

0:42:45.360 --> 0:42:47.480
<v Speaker 1>a clear understanding of that it was temporary.

0:42:47.820 --> 0:42:48.100
<v Speaker 5>Mm-hmm.

0:42:48.460 --> 0:42:49.819
<v Speaker 1>It was just, your mom come help us.

0:42:50.239 --> 0:42:50.500
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:42:50.920 --> 0:42:52.580
<v Speaker 1>And when you say, mom, come help us, and then

0:42:52.620 --> 0:42:54.650
<v Speaker 1>in their mind, they're like, well, I'm helping... this is

0:42:54.670 --> 0:42:56.330
<v Speaker 1>going to be my life because these kids are going

0:42:56.350 --> 0:42:58.630
<v Speaker 1>to be here until they go away to high school.

0:42:58.650 --> 0:43:00.190
<v Speaker 1>So I think in mom's mind, she's like, I'm just

0:43:00.210 --> 0:43:01.650
<v Speaker 1>going to be here with them and helping them while

0:43:01.670 --> 0:43:02.129
<v Speaker 1>they do this.

0:43:02.190 --> 0:43:02.430
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:43:02.570 --> 0:43:03.720
<v Speaker 2>As much or as little as they need.

0:43:03.880 --> 0:43:04.090
<v Speaker 4>Right.

0:43:04.300 --> 0:43:07.359
<v Speaker 1>And in our mind, it wasn't come help us in perpetuity.

0:43:07.580 --> 0:43:08.020
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:43:08.120 --> 0:43:11.120
<v Speaker 1>It was help us in this process. We'll reconvene in

0:43:11.180 --> 0:43:11.520
<v Speaker 1>a year.

0:43:11.880 --> 0:43:12.120
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:43:12.160 --> 0:43:15.540
<v Speaker 1>But like you said, COVID happened. Right after COVID, we

0:43:15.580 --> 0:43:18.570
<v Speaker 1>got pregnant again. After we got pregnant again, we started

0:43:18.610 --> 0:43:20.770
<v Speaker 1>looking at homes when Koda grew out of it, but

0:43:20.810 --> 0:43:23.930
<v Speaker 1>then Pops got sick. Then he got sick again. Then

0:43:23.969 --> 0:43:25.839
<v Speaker 1>it was the economic crisis and we had to wait.

0:43:25.880 --> 0:43:27.859
<v Speaker 1>It was like there was never a perfect time for

0:43:27.880 --> 0:43:31.300
<v Speaker 1>the next step. But what you said would have alleviated

0:43:31.360 --> 0:43:33.200
<v Speaker 1>all of that if mom would have known in the

0:43:33.260 --> 0:43:37.030
<v Speaker 1>very beginning that I'm doing this for a finite period

0:43:37.050 --> 0:43:37.490
<v Speaker 1>of time.

0:43:37.570 --> 0:43:41.670
<v Speaker 4>The idea is you're living with us. This is not home.

0:43:46.360 --> 0:43:49.180
<v Speaker 4>And those are two very different things. Like, if you understand, like,

0:43:49.840 --> 0:43:52.900
<v Speaker 4>you get comfortable in living with somebody, cool, because you

0:43:52.920 --> 0:43:56.200
<v Speaker 4>could never get comfortable living with somebody. But when you think, like,

0:43:56.239 --> 0:43:56.719
<v Speaker 4>this is home.

0:43:56.739 --> 0:43:59.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm home, yeah. I think that's how my mom and

0:43:59.140 --> 0:44:02.770
<v Speaker 2>dad saw it. Because you also want your people to

0:44:02.870 --> 0:44:05.989
<v Speaker 2>feel comfortable, right? You want them to feel like they're

0:44:06.010 --> 0:44:07.650
<v Speaker 2>at home. You want them to feel welcome and not

0:44:07.670 --> 0:44:09.630
<v Speaker 2>feel like they're a burden. And I think in some circumstances,

0:44:09.670 --> 0:44:12.779
<v Speaker 2>my mom, for example, she would constantly be like, Okay,

0:44:12.800 --> 0:44:13.820
<v Speaker 2>so what do you need help with? What do you

0:44:13.840 --> 0:44:16.290
<v Speaker 2>need done? And I'm like, Mom, go take your time.

0:44:16.750 --> 0:44:17.590
<v Speaker 2>Go play tennis.

0:44:17.650 --> 0:44:18.180
<v Speaker 1>Go to the gym.

0:44:18.780 --> 0:44:21.180
<v Speaker 2>Go take a break. Go back to Brooklyn to visit

0:44:21.300 --> 0:44:23.200
<v Speaker 2>your other two children. Like, I didn't want her to

0:44:23.280 --> 0:44:24.960
<v Speaker 2>feel like she was a prisoner in this home.

0:44:24.980 --> 0:44:25.580
<v Speaker 1>Or an employee.

0:44:25.680 --> 0:44:28.160
<v Speaker 2>And an employee. You know, she'd be going downstairs to

0:44:28.200 --> 0:44:29.700
<v Speaker 2>bed and she'd be like, anything you need before I

0:44:29.719 --> 0:44:31.009
<v Speaker 2>go to bed? I'm like, Cinderella.

0:44:31.300 --> 0:44:31.670
<v Speaker 1>Okay.

0:44:31.830 --> 0:44:34.430
<v Speaker 2>You're not going back to your quarters, you know?

0:44:34.550 --> 0:44:35.230
<v Speaker 6>I'm like, no.

0:44:35.350 --> 0:44:37.890
<v Speaker 1>And another thing.

0:44:38.390 --> 0:44:41.390
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, this is like, we're not running a slave ship here, sis.

0:44:41.430 --> 0:44:43.700
<v Speaker 2>We're just like, we appreciate the help. You don't have

0:44:43.719 --> 0:44:46.140
<v Speaker 2>to prove your worth every single day. We know that

0:44:46.180 --> 0:44:48.750
<v Speaker 2>you're valuable. We value you, you know? Yeah. So that's

0:44:48.770 --> 0:44:50.290
<v Speaker 2>something that we had to kind of get across to her.

0:44:51.050 --> 0:44:52.290
<v Speaker 4>I mean, that's a blessing though, man.

0:44:52.310 --> 0:44:52.650
<v Speaker 2>It sure is.

0:44:52.670 --> 0:44:56.830
<v Speaker 4>You got people who come through and they are there.

0:44:57.550 --> 0:44:59.150
<v Speaker 4>They're more of a burden than a blessing.

0:44:59.330 --> 0:44:59.880
<v Speaker 6>Yes. Right?

0:44:59.890 --> 0:45:03.180
<v Speaker 4>And it's a blessing to have mom come and be like,

0:45:03.380 --> 0:45:04.219
<v Speaker 4>what can I do?

0:45:04.239 --> 0:45:04.840
<v Speaker 2>Can I do?

0:45:04.880 --> 0:45:07.860
<v Speaker 4>Because you would be complaining about the complete opposite.

0:45:07.880 --> 0:45:09.020
<v Speaker 1>Like, she don't do nothing.

0:45:09.040 --> 0:45:09.719
<v Speaker 4>She's a kid.

0:45:09.760 --> 0:45:10.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh my God.

0:45:10.180 --> 0:45:11.220
<v Speaker 1>She's eating my food.

0:45:11.460 --> 0:45:12.990
<v Speaker 4>And she don't do nothing. I don't see this lady

0:45:13.110 --> 0:45:13.610
<v Speaker 4>all day.

0:45:13.640 --> 0:45:14.630
<v Speaker 1>Like, what is she here for?

0:45:14.710 --> 0:45:16.710
<v Speaker 2>You're absolutely right. Or it could be the other hand

0:45:16.730 --> 0:45:21.379
<v Speaker 2>where I actually... saw somebody recently who I touch base.

0:45:21.420 --> 0:45:23.580
<v Speaker 2>I know her daughter and her daughter has children. And

0:45:23.600 --> 0:45:25.440
<v Speaker 2>I was like, Hey, how such and such. And she's like,

0:45:25.460 --> 0:45:27.570
<v Speaker 2>she's good. The kids are good. They're living over there.

0:45:27.590 --> 0:45:29.910
<v Speaker 2>And I told him I'm not coming to watch no kids.

0:45:29.950 --> 0:45:31.790
<v Speaker 2>So y'all can pop in when I say I'm ready

0:45:31.830 --> 0:45:34.759
<v Speaker 2>for visitors. But when I'm done, y'all gotta go. And

0:45:34.780 --> 0:45:36.920
<v Speaker 2>she laughed and joked about it, but she was dead serious.

0:45:36.960 --> 0:45:40.400
<v Speaker 2>So she's not that grandmother that wants to be hands-on.

0:45:40.540 --> 0:45:42.609
<v Speaker 2>She doesn't want to be that, and that's okay for her.

0:45:42.630 --> 0:45:43.390
<v Speaker 1>Set that boundary.

0:45:43.570 --> 0:45:45.549
<v Speaker 2>Because she set the boundary in the beginning. I'm not

0:45:45.610 --> 0:45:49.890
<v Speaker 2>that grandmother. So it has to be the expectations set

0:45:49.910 --> 0:45:50.410
<v Speaker 2>ahead of time.

0:45:50.450 --> 0:45:52.350
<v Speaker 4>As a matter of fact, don't call me grandma. Call

0:45:52.370 --> 0:45:53.880
<v Speaker 4>me grandma. Grandma, yes.

0:45:54.140 --> 0:45:54.940
<v Speaker 2>That's the Gigi.

0:45:54.960 --> 0:45:57.660
<v Speaker 1>That's the grandmas. My mother was the same way. I

0:45:57.680 --> 0:45:59.120
<v Speaker 1>was like, Amaya, if you move down here. She was

0:45:59.140 --> 0:46:00.279
<v Speaker 1>just like, well, I'm not going to be going out

0:46:00.320 --> 0:46:01.879
<v Speaker 1>here to just be babysitting for you. I got things

0:46:01.940 --> 0:46:03.960
<v Speaker 1>I want to do. And I was like, fair.

0:46:04.140 --> 0:46:05.700
<v Speaker 6>My mother would be telling my brother, you just want

0:46:05.739 --> 0:46:07.719
<v Speaker 6>a built-in babysitter.

0:46:07.760 --> 0:46:08.959
<v Speaker 1>And it's like, no, but yeah.

0:46:09.219 --> 0:46:09.560
<v Speaker 4>Yes.

0:46:09.840 --> 0:46:10.719
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, you want both.

0:46:10.900 --> 0:46:12.160
<v Speaker 4>I don't want you to have your life, but.

0:46:12.040 --> 0:46:15.080
<v Speaker 1>Take care of these kids. The thing about my mother, though,

0:46:15.120 --> 0:46:16.970
<v Speaker 1>and this is, yo, Tribble, you got to write this down.

0:46:17.450 --> 0:46:21.890
<v Speaker 1>We wanted to do a mother-in-law of the groom and

0:46:21.930 --> 0:46:27.190
<v Speaker 1>a mother-in-law of the bride. They're two different tasks, two

0:46:27.230 --> 0:46:30.800
<v Speaker 1>different job descriptions. And I see it. For example, Mimi

0:46:30.840 --> 0:46:34.500
<v Speaker 1>staying here works for us because that's her daughter. When

0:46:34.520 --> 0:46:36.900
<v Speaker 1>they dealing with all of that stuff. My mother was

0:46:36.980 --> 0:46:39.980
<v Speaker 1>automatically like, I'm not even trying to do that. Because

0:46:40.100 --> 0:46:44.169
<v Speaker 1>my father's mother was overbearing. My nana. And my mother

0:46:44.210 --> 0:46:47.250
<v Speaker 1>was like, this is my house. I don't want my

0:46:47.310 --> 0:46:50.170
<v Speaker 1>husband's mom telling me how everything in my house is

0:46:50.190 --> 0:46:50.890
<v Speaker 1>supposed to be.

0:46:51.050 --> 0:46:52.310
<v Speaker 2>Two women can't live in the same house.

0:46:52.430 --> 0:46:54.390
<v Speaker 1>So my mother stayed away. And my mother was like,

0:46:54.430 --> 0:46:56.989
<v Speaker 1>I'm not trying to be overbearing to Kay. Mm-hmm. And

0:46:57.010 --> 0:46:58.509
<v Speaker 1>I was like, you know what? I respect that, ma.

0:46:58.570 --> 0:46:59.870
<v Speaker 1>And then Kay was saying the same thing. Like, I

0:46:59.910 --> 0:47:03.049
<v Speaker 1>respect your mom for saying that. So for me, the

0:47:03.090 --> 0:47:04.750
<v Speaker 1>same way my mom can say, yo, I'm not going

0:47:04.770 --> 0:47:07.910
<v Speaker 1>to be somebody's babysitter. The child should also be able

0:47:07.930 --> 0:47:08.910
<v Speaker 1>to say to their parent.

0:47:09.010 --> 0:47:09.250
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:47:09.430 --> 0:47:12.029
<v Speaker 1>Like, hey, you can help us, but let's reconvene in

0:47:12.070 --> 0:47:13.859
<v Speaker 1>six months and see how we feel about each other.

0:47:14.010 --> 0:47:14.160
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:47:14.180 --> 0:47:14.800
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying?

0:47:14.880 --> 0:47:15.530
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, for sure.

0:47:15.760 --> 0:47:16.400
<v Speaker 6>Communication.

0:47:17.300 --> 0:47:17.860
<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

0:47:18.739 --> 0:47:19.080
<v Speaker 4>All right, y'all.

0:47:19.100 --> 0:47:20.460
<v Speaker 2>Let's take a quick break and we will be back

0:47:20.520 --> 0:47:24.400
<v Speaker 2>with our listener letter for this episode. So stick around.

0:47:39.660 --> 0:47:41.319
<v Speaker 2>All right, so let's jump on in.

0:47:41.400 --> 0:47:41.840
<v Speaker 6>Hi.

0:47:41.920 --> 0:47:43.880
<v Speaker 2>So me and my partner have been dating since August

0:47:43.900 --> 0:47:48.500
<v Speaker 2>of 2025. It's like yesterday. Yeah, it's literally yesterday. So

0:47:48.520 --> 0:47:51.020
<v Speaker 2>we were freshly new in the relationship. But within our

0:47:51.100 --> 0:47:53.400
<v Speaker 2>first year together, I got pregnant. And during that time,

0:47:53.800 --> 0:47:55.819
<v Speaker 2>I found out that his ex was pregnant at the

0:47:55.900 --> 0:48:00.540
<v Speaker 2>same time with our babies being two weeks apart.

0:48:00.600 --> 0:48:01.000
<v Speaker 1>Irish twins.

0:48:01.020 --> 0:48:02.100
<v Speaker 2>Project twins.

0:48:02.120 --> 0:48:03.760
<v Speaker 1>They call them a whole bunch of things.

0:48:04.080 --> 0:48:06.620
<v Speaker 2>All right now. He admits that he's sorry and that

0:48:06.660 --> 0:48:08.680
<v Speaker 2>he messed up. He plans to marry me one day.

0:48:09.219 --> 0:48:13.310
<v Speaker 2>A whole sad, sorry story. So my question to you is,

0:48:13.710 --> 0:48:16.089
<v Speaker 2>how do I allow myself to accept this and move

0:48:16.150 --> 0:48:18.590
<v Speaker 2>forward and be happy with my partner? Easy.

0:48:18.630 --> 0:48:22.109
<v Speaker 1>You watch sisters, right? And everything that Karen and Fatima did,

0:48:22.150 --> 0:48:26.239
<v Speaker 1>do the opposite. This is literally the same story, bro.

0:48:26.480 --> 0:48:27.080
<v Speaker 2>My goodness.

0:48:27.100 --> 0:48:28.700
<v Speaker 1>You get your ex pregnant at the same time as

0:48:28.719 --> 0:48:32.060
<v Speaker 1>your new girl pregnant. This is literally a Tyler Perry script. Bruh.

0:48:32.200 --> 0:48:34.299
<v Speaker 2>How do you allow yourself to accept this? Are you

0:48:34.360 --> 0:48:36.529
<v Speaker 2>willing to accept this? That's the first question we have

0:48:36.570 --> 0:48:40.000
<v Speaker 2>to ask. You know what I mean? You have to decide.

0:48:40.020 --> 0:48:41.940
<v Speaker 2>You're going to have to accept the fact that you're

0:48:41.960 --> 0:48:44.379
<v Speaker 2>having a baby. But it's going to be a.

0:48:44.440 --> 0:48:46.180
<v Speaker 1>There's a lot more context. I wish she would have

0:48:46.200 --> 0:48:47.200
<v Speaker 1>gave us some context.

0:48:47.219 --> 0:48:48.730
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, this was a really short one.

0:48:49.100 --> 0:48:51.000
<v Speaker 1>This is my thing I wanted to know. I just

0:48:51.020 --> 0:48:54.799
<v Speaker 1>want to know. Were you exclusive with your partner when

0:48:54.840 --> 0:48:57.100
<v Speaker 1>he went back to have sex with his ex? Because

0:48:57.180 --> 0:48:59.779
<v Speaker 1>if y'all were exclusive, then that means he cheated on you.

0:48:59.900 --> 0:49:01.610
<v Speaker 1>And if you're willing to deal with it, that's on you.

0:49:01.940 --> 0:49:02.180
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:49:02.239 --> 0:49:04.480
<v Speaker 1>If you weren't exclusive and you just so happened to

0:49:04.520 --> 0:49:06.860
<v Speaker 1>get pregnant and she got pregnant. Right. Now it's a

0:49:06.900 --> 0:49:08.220
<v Speaker 1>real conversation because.

0:49:08.239 --> 0:49:11.310
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because you were only dating since 2025, August. That's

0:49:11.390 --> 0:49:12.230
<v Speaker 2>literally a year.

0:49:12.250 --> 0:49:12.550
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:49:12.690 --> 0:49:15.629
<v Speaker 2>In this relationship. So was it an exclusive relationship?

0:49:16.810 --> 0:49:17.770
<v Speaker 1>That's what we need to know.

0:49:17.830 --> 0:49:19.690
<v Speaker 6>And has he really shown that he's going to marry you?

0:49:19.790 --> 0:49:19.930
<v Speaker 3>Right.

0:49:20.160 --> 0:49:22.640
<v Speaker 2>The plan to marry you one day? Is that lip service?

0:49:22.660 --> 0:49:22.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:49:23.040 --> 0:49:25.719
<v Speaker 2>Do you believe him? Do you want to marry him?

0:49:28.020 --> 0:49:30.560
<v Speaker 1>Can you believe your discernment now that you're pregnant and

0:49:30.580 --> 0:49:32.399
<v Speaker 1>you have different hormones and feelings?

0:49:33.040 --> 0:49:35.160
<v Speaker 2>Will you guys be co-parenting? Will you be raising these

0:49:35.180 --> 0:49:37.969
<v Speaker 2>children as siblings together? Will you be parallel parenting?

0:49:38.430 --> 0:49:39.239
<v Speaker 1>That's a lot of questions.

0:49:39.260 --> 0:49:39.820
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:49:40.020 --> 0:49:43.140
<v Speaker 3>Personally, DeVal, this is not a man-hating statement.

0:49:43.160 --> 0:49:46.220
<v Speaker 4>Aw, man, she hates him already. And here we go.

0:49:47.080 --> 0:49:48.239
<v Speaker 3>But I think a man.

0:49:49.600 --> 0:49:52.060
<v Speaker 3>Ah, for real. I think a man who gets women

0:49:52.100 --> 0:49:55.240
<v Speaker 3>pregnant willy-nilly is not one you can trust.

0:49:55.739 --> 0:49:57.450
<v Speaker 1>So what about a woman who gets pregnant by a

0:49:57.450 --> 0:49:58.359
<v Speaker 1>bunch of men all the time?

0:49:59.230 --> 0:50:01.069
<v Speaker 3>Well, that's not the case here. I'm just saying. He

0:50:01.110 --> 0:50:03.129
<v Speaker 3>got these two girls pregnant at the same time. He

0:50:03.150 --> 0:50:04.550
<v Speaker 3>not wrapping it up. He not being careful.

0:50:04.570 --> 0:50:05.069
<v Speaker 4>He not even.

0:50:05.650 --> 0:50:08.450
<v Speaker 3>being discerning with who he's putting his seed in.

0:50:08.550 --> 0:50:10.420
<v Speaker 1>I agree with you on that.

0:50:10.440 --> 0:50:12.779
<v Speaker 2>That is fair. She might have thought they were in

0:50:12.800 --> 0:50:14.880
<v Speaker 2>a relationship and she's pregnant, so she's like, okay, cool.

0:50:14.920 --> 0:50:16.439
<v Speaker 2>We're going to have this baby and it's me.

0:50:16.460 --> 0:50:17.780
<v Speaker 1>That's why I said we need context.

0:50:17.880 --> 0:50:18.939
<v Speaker 4>I would agree with this, though.

0:50:19.460 --> 0:50:22.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm not a philanderer. I'm not with that. I think

0:50:22.040 --> 0:50:23.960
<v Speaker 1>that men have to be more accountable with who they

0:50:24.000 --> 0:50:25.340
<v Speaker 1>lay down with. I say it all the time. I

0:50:25.360 --> 0:50:27.160
<v Speaker 1>even said it in the book. The fact that you

0:50:27.180 --> 0:50:29.430
<v Speaker 1>lay down and had unprotected sex with those women at

0:50:29.469 --> 0:50:31.410
<v Speaker 1>the same time, knowing the fact that you could have

0:50:31.469 --> 0:50:34.270
<v Speaker 1>a child, lets me know that you're not using any discernment.

0:50:34.290 --> 0:50:36.489
<v Speaker 1>I would agree with that. I will agree with that.

0:50:36.510 --> 0:50:38.250
<v Speaker 1>So she has to really look at that and say,

0:50:38.270 --> 0:50:40.049
<v Speaker 1>is this the person I want to build a life with?

0:50:40.450 --> 0:50:43.009
<v Speaker 1>You couldn't even make that decision because Zach was an

0:50:43.070 --> 0:50:46.030
<v Speaker 1>idiot when he did that to Karen and Fatima. Think

0:50:46.070 --> 0:50:49.020
<v Speaker 1>about Zach was not the best person on the show

0:50:49.060 --> 0:50:50.720
<v Speaker 1>when he did that. It was just like, Zach, why?

0:50:51.460 --> 0:50:52.759
<v Speaker 1>So we have to kind of hold this.

0:50:52.780 --> 0:50:53.200
<v Speaker 4>You know what?

0:50:53.500 --> 0:50:55.740
<v Speaker 2>Geneva was outside too.

0:50:55.840 --> 0:50:59.450
<v Speaker 3>I think good men have a strong sense of commitment.

0:51:00.060 --> 0:51:00.460
<v Speaker 1>That's true.

0:51:00.520 --> 0:51:02.300
<v Speaker 3>So I don't think a good man would have gotten

0:51:02.360 --> 0:51:03.540
<v Speaker 3>another chick pregnant. Right.

0:51:03.719 --> 0:51:06.000
<v Speaker 7>Does he use the word philanderer? Because if he does,

0:51:07.260 --> 0:51:07.640
<v Speaker 7>he loyal.

0:51:09.150 --> 0:51:09.710
<v Speaker 3>Philanderer.

0:51:09.750 --> 0:51:09.950
<v Speaker 6>Oh, okay.

0:51:09.969 --> 0:51:10.630
<v Speaker 4>I can go look it up.

0:51:11.610 --> 0:51:12.649
<v Speaker 6>Only certain men use that word.

0:51:12.710 --> 0:51:18.530
<v Speaker 4>It's a man who frequently has casual, non-committed, unfaithful sexual

0:51:18.610 --> 0:51:22.180
<v Speaker 4>relations with multiple women, often while married or committed relationships.

0:51:22.630 --> 0:51:24.690
<v Speaker 6>The guys doing it don't know what that means.

0:51:24.810 --> 0:51:26.960
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I didn't know what it was. I'm not doing it,

0:51:27.090 --> 0:51:28.660
<v Speaker 4>but I didn't know what it was.

0:51:28.840 --> 0:51:30.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm not a judger of people. There are people in

0:51:30.920 --> 0:51:35.180
<v Speaker 1>different types of relationships and situations. There's polyamory and all

0:51:35.200 --> 0:51:38.060
<v Speaker 1>this other... When you're a guy and you're getting multiple

0:51:38.100 --> 0:51:41.259
<v Speaker 1>women pregnant who don't know about each other, that's exclusive

0:51:41.300 --> 0:51:42.989
<v Speaker 1>of all of those other things. Well, yeah.

0:51:43.030 --> 0:51:45.089
<v Speaker 2>You have to know what kind of relationship that you're

0:51:45.170 --> 0:51:45.469
<v Speaker 2>actually in.

0:51:45.489 --> 0:51:46.410
<v Speaker 1>That's fair, Triple.

0:51:46.810 --> 0:51:47.310
<v Speaker 2>You know what?

0:51:47.450 --> 0:51:49.530
<v Speaker 1>I was ready to laugh and tell you you're a man-hater,

0:51:49.550 --> 0:51:53.370
<v Speaker 1>but you're absolutely right with that. Yeah, absolutely.

0:51:53.430 --> 0:51:55.390
<v Speaker 6>I still feel like there's lack of context, though.

0:51:55.610 --> 0:51:58.410
<v Speaker 2>For sure. And the whole, he plans to marry me

0:51:58.489 --> 0:52:00.390
<v Speaker 2>one day. He didn't plan to wear a condom. He

0:52:00.410 --> 0:52:01.920
<v Speaker 2>didn't plan to get both of y'all pregnant, but here

0:52:01.960 --> 0:52:04.239
<v Speaker 2>we are. So you have to kind of see like,

0:52:04.280 --> 0:52:04.680
<v Speaker 2>what is this?

0:52:04.780 --> 0:52:06.060
<v Speaker 6>How we know they didn't know about each other?

0:52:07.300 --> 0:52:07.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, girl.

0:52:07.820 --> 0:52:08.299
<v Speaker 4>Right back in.

0:52:08.320 --> 0:52:09.989
<v Speaker 2>Right back in with some more details.

0:52:10.010 --> 0:52:12.410
<v Speaker 3>She said he said he messed up and he was wrong.

0:52:12.690 --> 0:52:13.810
<v Speaker 6>That don't mean they don't know about each other.

0:52:14.190 --> 0:52:14.669
<v Speaker 1>That's true.

0:52:14.870 --> 0:52:15.109
<v Speaker 6>Right.

0:52:15.760 --> 0:52:17.400
<v Speaker 1>That means he could be wrong about getting her pregnant.

0:52:17.760 --> 0:52:17.940
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:52:18.219 --> 0:52:18.540
<v Speaker 3>Okay.

0:52:18.719 --> 0:52:20.700
<v Speaker 2>And there are two babies coming into this world who

0:52:20.719 --> 0:52:21.759
<v Speaker 2>will be siblings two weeks apart.

0:52:21.780 --> 0:52:23.180
<v Speaker 1>All right, so now I'm back on Matt's side. You

0:52:23.239 --> 0:52:27.970
<v Speaker 1>hate men! No, I rock with your point on this.

0:52:28.270 --> 0:52:31.069
<v Speaker 1>There is something about a man who continuously keeps getting

0:52:31.110 --> 0:52:33.830
<v Speaker 1>women pregnant at the same time. At some point, especially

0:52:33.850 --> 0:52:36.450
<v Speaker 1>if you... No, you know what? I will say this.

0:52:36.969 --> 0:52:39.690
<v Speaker 1>If you were telling her that you plan on marrying her,

0:52:40.310 --> 0:52:42.880
<v Speaker 1>why were you sleeping with that woman unprotected?

0:52:42.900 --> 0:52:44.299
<v Speaker 6>But what if he didn't tell her that until after?

0:52:45.120 --> 0:52:46.660
<v Speaker 1>Then that's a problem, and that means that was never

0:52:46.680 --> 0:52:47.820
<v Speaker 1>his plan. He's a philanderer.

0:52:47.840 --> 0:52:48.759
<v Speaker 2>See what I'm saying?

0:52:48.780 --> 0:52:50.420
<v Speaker 3>Now he just trying to keep his home.

0:52:50.460 --> 0:52:54.200
<v Speaker 4>You philanthropists. Look at Josh.

0:52:54.280 --> 0:52:59.469
<v Speaker 1>I'm not a philanthropist, baby, I promise. If you could

0:52:59.510 --> 0:53:01.690
<v Speaker 1>write in, ma'am, please give us some more context so

0:53:01.710 --> 0:53:03.730
<v Speaker 1>we can understand, but I'm going to have to rock

0:53:03.830 --> 0:53:06.629
<v Speaker 1>with Tribble on this one and be like, getting two

0:53:06.650 --> 0:53:09.310
<v Speaker 1>women pregnant at the same time, it seems like he

0:53:09.350 --> 0:53:11.529
<v Speaker 1>was trying to, or he's not sure. And even if

0:53:11.570 --> 0:53:13.670
<v Speaker 1>you're not sure, That's not somebody you want to plan

0:53:13.730 --> 0:53:14.390
<v Speaker 1>a life with.

0:53:14.410 --> 0:53:14.890
<v Speaker 2>Right. Yeah.

0:53:14.969 --> 0:53:15.830
<v Speaker 4>It's unfortunate, man.

0:53:15.930 --> 0:53:16.469
<v Speaker 1>Only a year in.

0:53:16.610 --> 0:53:18.630
<v Speaker 4>You happy a baby's coming into the world, you got

0:53:18.650 --> 0:53:22.239
<v Speaker 4>to deal with this dude having another baby. Listen, write

0:53:22.410 --> 0:53:24.780
<v Speaker 4>in and tell us what the rest is, but also

0:53:24.980 --> 0:53:27.060
<v Speaker 4>send me the first draft and I'll tell you what

0:53:27.080 --> 0:53:29.020
<v Speaker 4>you're missing and I'll tell you to give us more context.

0:53:29.140 --> 0:53:29.580
<v Speaker 3>There we go.

0:53:29.800 --> 0:53:30.350
<v Speaker 1>Josh like chat GPT.

0:53:30.360 --> 0:53:31.860
<v Speaker 2>That sounds like a plan.

0:53:32.100 --> 0:53:32.900
<v Speaker 1>Send another prompt.

0:53:33.000 --> 0:53:33.759
<v Speaker 2>Send another prompt.

0:53:33.920 --> 0:53:34.240
<v Speaker 1>Okay.

0:53:34.660 --> 0:53:36.140
<v Speaker 2>If you want to be featured as a listener letter

0:53:36.200 --> 0:53:41.070
<v Speaker 2>on one of our shows, email us at theellisadvice.com. At gmail.com.

0:53:41.150 --> 0:53:46.990
<v Speaker 1>That's T-H-E-E-L-L-I-S-A-D-V-I-C-E at gmail.com.

0:53:47.270 --> 0:53:50.010
<v Speaker 2>It's like a song now. All right, moment of truth time.

0:53:50.030 --> 0:53:53.620
<v Speaker 2>We're talking about energy shifting in your space, homes, what

0:53:53.640 --> 0:53:56.620
<v Speaker 2>it's like to live with other people, roommates, all the things, parents.

0:53:56.960 --> 0:53:57.919
<v Speaker 2>What's your moment of truth, babe?

0:53:58.219 --> 0:54:00.420
<v Speaker 1>My moment of truth is simple. There is a duality

0:54:00.500 --> 0:54:04.710
<v Speaker 1>exists where you need help, but you need space. Understand

0:54:04.750 --> 0:54:07.549
<v Speaker 1>how to exist and navigate in that realm. Too much

0:54:07.590 --> 0:54:10.260
<v Speaker 1>of either can be bad for you and your partner,

0:54:10.320 --> 0:54:12.540
<v Speaker 1>but also bad for your family in general.

0:54:12.800 --> 0:54:13.080
<v Speaker 2>In general.

0:54:13.219 --> 0:54:13.620
<v Speaker 3>I love that.

0:54:13.980 --> 0:54:14.500
<v Speaker 2>Matt, what you got?

0:54:14.960 --> 0:54:15.700
<v Speaker 6>Don't be a philanderer.

0:54:18.680 --> 0:54:19.960
<v Speaker 4>Unless you're a philanthropist.

0:54:20.219 --> 0:54:20.860
<v Speaker 2>There you go.

0:54:20.880 --> 0:54:25.070
<v Speaker 1>Be a philanthropist, not a philanderer. Nice. Put that on

0:54:25.090 --> 0:54:25.230
<v Speaker 1>a shirt.

0:54:25.250 --> 0:54:25.710
<v Speaker 6>That's dope.

0:54:25.770 --> 0:54:27.489
<v Speaker 3>I agree.

0:54:29.790 --> 0:54:30.910
<v Speaker 6>With Matt. That was good.

0:54:31.070 --> 0:54:32.550
<v Speaker 4>That was good.

0:54:32.610 --> 0:54:34.089
<v Speaker 2>It was like, you know, good job.

0:54:34.290 --> 0:54:35.370
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:54:35.450 --> 0:54:38.640
<v Speaker 3>My moment of truth, I don't think I'm Being naked

0:54:38.700 --> 0:54:41.120
<v Speaker 3>enough in my house. I live alone. I think I

0:54:41.140 --> 0:54:42.080
<v Speaker 3>need to start taking advantage.

0:54:42.140 --> 0:54:42.740
<v Speaker 6>Oh, you're bugging.

0:54:42.820 --> 0:54:44.779
<v Speaker 1>Hey, you trying to fend Max? You trying to fend Max?

0:54:44.820 --> 0:54:45.280
<v Speaker 1>Go naked.

0:54:45.300 --> 0:54:46.940
<v Speaker 3>That's right.

0:54:47.080 --> 0:54:49.319
<v Speaker 2>Keep it skimsy, baby.

0:54:49.340 --> 0:54:51.560
<v Speaker 4>You don't actually know how low it is until you

0:54:51.580 --> 0:54:52.080
<v Speaker 4>take it off.

0:54:52.320 --> 0:54:53.200
<v Speaker 3>Period.

0:54:53.340 --> 0:54:53.860
<v Speaker 6>Period.

0:54:53.880 --> 0:54:55.380
<v Speaker 2>Do they wobble to and fro?

0:54:55.400 --> 0:54:58.940
<v Speaker 1>Is the question. Look what y'all started. Look what y'all started.

0:54:59.880 --> 0:55:01.580
<v Speaker 2>My moment of truth is welcome back.

0:55:02.540 --> 0:55:03.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, welcome back.

0:55:03.060 --> 0:55:03.930
<v Speaker 2>Welcome back, babe.

0:55:03.969 --> 0:55:04.489
<v Speaker 1>Welcome back.

0:55:04.530 --> 0:55:06.069
<v Speaker 2>Welcome back to our new norm.

0:55:09.719 --> 0:55:10.239
<v Speaker 1>Partner money.

0:55:10.380 --> 0:55:10.820
<v Speaker 4>Alright.

0:55:11.500 --> 0:55:13.680
<v Speaker 2>Be sure to find us on Patreon if you have

0:55:13.760 --> 0:55:16.609
<v Speaker 2>not as yet. That's where the after party, the after

0:55:16.650 --> 0:55:20.110
<v Speaker 2>show goes down. There's also exclusive Ellis Ever After content

0:55:20.170 --> 0:55:22.550
<v Speaker 2>and family content there. You can find us on social

0:55:22.750 --> 0:55:24.810
<v Speaker 2>at Ellis Ever After and you can find me at

0:55:24.830 --> 0:55:25.410
<v Speaker 2>Kadena I am.

0:55:25.430 --> 0:55:26.770
<v Speaker 1>I am Deval.

0:55:26.969 --> 0:55:28.069
<v Speaker 6>I'm underscore Matt Ellis.

0:55:28.370 --> 0:55:29.570
<v Speaker 4>And I'm Joshua underscore Dwayne.

0:55:29.790 --> 0:55:33.410
<v Speaker 3>And I'm Matt Tribbs, the cool T-R-I-B-B-Z, the cool on everything.

0:55:33.440 --> 0:55:37.640
<v Speaker 1>And if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review,

0:55:38.100 --> 0:55:40.259
<v Speaker 1>And subscribe, and make sure you get your copy of

0:55:40.300 --> 0:55:40.930
<v Speaker 1>We Over Me.

0:55:41.450 --> 0:55:42.009
<v Speaker 3>Ooh, yeah.

0:55:42.270 --> 0:55:42.489
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:55:44.050 --> 0:55:44.590
<v Speaker 6>Ellis.

0:55:45.630 --> 0:55:46.850
<v Speaker 2>I was waiting for you to.

0:55:48.550 --> 0:55:49.609
<v Speaker 1>Say it.

0:55:49.650 --> 0:55:49.870
<v Speaker 4>Cut!

0:55:51.010 --> 0:55:54.950
<v Speaker 3>Ellis Ever After is an iHeartMedia podcast. It's hosted by

0:55:55.030 --> 0:55:59.989
<v Speaker 3>Kadeen and DeVal Ellis. It's produced by Tribble. Video production

0:56:00.060 --> 0:56:04.779
<v Speaker 3>by Joshua Duane and Matthew Ellis. Video editing by LaShawn Rowe.

0:57:50.980 --> 0:57:51.410
<v Speaker 1>Thank you.