1
00:00:00,840 --> 00:00:04,520
Speaker 1: Hi, Catherine, Hi Chelsea. Hi, I'm very exciting announcement. Guys.

2
00:00:04,960 --> 00:00:07,560
Speaker 1: My new special is coming out on Netflix in December,

3
00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:12,800
Speaker 1: two days after Christmas, so I'm very excited. It's called Revolution,

4
00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:16,360
Speaker 1: and it is my next This is the tour that

5
00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:19,200
Speaker 1: I've been on, the Vaccinated and Horny Tour, which was

6
00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:21,640
Speaker 1: just the tour name. The special name is called Revolution,

7
00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:24,760
Speaker 1: and you'll understand why once you see it. I love

8
00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:29,160
Speaker 1: that it's like an evolution from Evolution. It's my last

9
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,680
Speaker 1: special was Evolution, and this special is Revolution, and the

10
00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:37,560
Speaker 1: next special will be Devolution. Amazing. I'm so excited to

11
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:40,320
Speaker 1: see it. Thank you. I'm so excited. It's I love it.

12
00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:42,159
Speaker 1: I just I'm so happy with it. I never am

13
00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:44,840
Speaker 1: able to watch myself do things. It's just very hard

14
00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:46,800
Speaker 1: to watch myself. But I think I've gotten to a

15
00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:48,360
Speaker 1: place in my life where I accept it and I

16
00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:50,960
Speaker 1: don't annoy the ship out of myself anymore. You know. Well,

17
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:53,120
Speaker 1: it's just I haven't seen the special, but the show

18
00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:56,480
Speaker 1: is very cute. It's very sweet and charming, and I

19
00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:58,600
Speaker 1: think everybody's going, well, that's what everyone thinks of when

20
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:00,840
Speaker 1: they think of me. It's cute, sweet and charming. So

21
00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:02,520
Speaker 1: there you go. You hit the nail on the head

22
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:06,160
Speaker 1: once again. Exactly, very on brand, very on brand, Chelsea.

23
00:01:06,360 --> 00:01:10,679
Speaker 1: It is Thanksgiving Day. Oh my goodness, Happy Thanksgiving everybody.

24
00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:13,919
Speaker 1: I am currently in San Francisco tending to my sister

25
00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:18,120
Speaker 1: who had a surgical procedure for her back, and so

26
00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:21,400
Speaker 1: I am playing nurse, even though I am not, you know,

27
00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:24,320
Speaker 1: that great at it, although I think she's pretty impressed

28
00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:27,800
Speaker 1: with my performance so far or my professionalism since I

29
00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:30,640
Speaker 1: have so much experience in the medical field and caring

30
00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:33,680
Speaker 1: for others. Yes, and you can prescribe her drugs, yes, exactly,

31
00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:35,319
Speaker 1: and then I could take her drugs, so it works

32
00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:40,200
Speaker 1: as a beautiful revolution trades. Yeah. Well, I am in

33
00:01:40,319 --> 00:01:43,720
Speaker 1: Chicago with my husband's family. We usually don't go home

34
00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:45,880
Speaker 1: for Thanksgiving, but we're doing it. That we did it

35
00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:49,440
Speaker 1: this year. Oh well, okay, and that's exciting. It's all

36
00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:52,560
Speaker 1: going swimmingly. I bet, I bet it is going swimmy.

37
00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:55,800
Speaker 1: We'll save that conversation for off the end, just because

38
00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:59,000
Speaker 1: I'm aware of some of your previous trips. Yes, we

39
00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:03,880
Speaker 1: have only unfortunately met my twin nephews, who are now

40
00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:06,840
Speaker 1: almost two. We've only met them once. Because of pandemic,

41
00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:09,960
Speaker 1: and then every time we've been home they've had like hand,

42
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,720
Speaker 1: foot and mouth disease. They went from that straight into

43
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:16,600
Speaker 1: COVID and then like norovirus. Every time we're a home,

44
00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:24,560
Speaker 1: foot in mouth, monkey pox, all the things. Babies, no bueno. Yeah,

45
00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:27,359
Speaker 1: but now they're walking, so it's all over. Oh my god,

46
00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:29,520
Speaker 1: they're not even walking it and they've had all these diseases.

47
00:02:29,639 --> 00:02:34,400
Speaker 1: I know, it's just all it's all happening. So I'm

48
00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:36,840
Speaker 1: excited to spend some time with them and snuggle them

49
00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:40,120
Speaker 1: and pick up something. Yeah, yeah, definitely get ready. You

50
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,840
Speaker 1: should wear a mask over all of your holes. You

51
00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:45,400
Speaker 1: don't want to get an ear infection. If you know

52
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:48,000
Speaker 1: what I'm talking about, I don't know what I do

53
00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:54,040
Speaker 1: about it. I'm excited to explore. Okay, so our guests today,

54
00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:58,000
Speaker 1: we have two guests. They are co stars of the

55
00:02:58,080 --> 00:03:00,840
Speaker 1: show The Office. I guess I should say they were

56
00:03:00,919 --> 00:03:02,720
Speaker 1: co stars of the show The Office and now there

57
00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:05,720
Speaker 1: but there are real life bfs and they are now

58
00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:09,040
Speaker 1: co hosts of the hit podcast Office Ladies and now

59
00:03:09,080 --> 00:03:12,160
Speaker 1: co authors because their new book called The Office Bfs

60
00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:16,320
Speaker 1: is out now. And their names are Angela Kinsey and

61
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:21,560
Speaker 1: Jenni Fisher. Hi, girls, Hi, Sorry, I've been sitting here

62
00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:24,600
Speaker 1: and then I realized that my video was off. Oh

63
00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,760
Speaker 1: did you already do the interview without us? I did

64
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:30,359
Speaker 1: the whole thing. It was great. Okay, well let's wrap

65
00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:32,560
Speaker 1: it up. Then it was a great review. Thanks. It

66
00:03:32,639 --> 00:03:39,560
Speaker 1: was so great talking with you. Hi, Hi girls, girls, Hello, hello, hello,

67
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:44,280
Speaker 1: coming coming to us live from Angela's in her garage. Jenna,

68
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:48,240
Speaker 1: where are you. I am in a closet that I

69
00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:52,640
Speaker 1: transformed into a podcasting space. I brought a plant in

70
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:57,160
Speaker 1: it looks you good. Bring in some oxygen. Yes, I

71
00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:01,840
Speaker 1: have a hummingbird painting. So you know, really, we're just

72
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,960
Speaker 1: we're just sexy and it's all happening with our plans

73
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:08,839
Speaker 1: and our words. Very sexual. That was the first thing

74
00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,760
Speaker 1: that I was going to say. I know, we get

75
00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:14,640
Speaker 1: that a lot, and your background art is very sexual

76
00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:17,760
Speaker 1: as well as the person who has to worry about

77
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:20,960
Speaker 1: the sound quality. I mean, I'm so happy to hear

78
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:24,840
Speaker 1: your in small spaces with soft things like closets and

79
00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:27,960
Speaker 1: you know, girls, I'm having a podcast room built in

80
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:32,920
Speaker 1: my new house, which won't be ready until so I

81
00:04:33,040 --> 00:04:35,880
Speaker 1: keep coming to the studio thinking it's temporary, and I'm like,

82
00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,520
Speaker 1: ohh any day now, and then I've just come to

83
00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:41,200
Speaker 1: the realization that I will probably never be moving. By

84
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:44,440
Speaker 1: the time that house is done, I will have sold it.

85
00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:47,760
Speaker 1: That is how I feel. We were having to podcast

86
00:04:48,279 --> 00:04:50,880
Speaker 1: during the pandemic, during the lockdown, when we were in

87
00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:54,320
Speaker 1: our homes, and so that's when Angela and I started

88
00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:58,960
Speaker 1: podcasting from our closets and I ordered the soundproofing thingies,

89
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:02,800
Speaker 1: you know, the ads for the walls, And that's sort

90
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:05,640
Speaker 1: of how this came about. And now it's great. First

91
00:05:05,640 --> 00:05:07,719
Speaker 1: of all, I love your podcast. I love that you

92
00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:11,480
Speaker 1: guys decided to revisit your own show and break it apart.

93
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:15,480
Speaker 1: It's very, very entertaining, and obviously it's a huge hit,

94
00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:17,680
Speaker 1: so a lot of people are loving it as well.

95
00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:21,600
Speaker 1: Now you guys are really good friends in real life obviously, right,

96
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:27,680
Speaker 1: best friends, best friends. I love. We've hit the BFF.

97
00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:31,680
Speaker 1: We're there. That's our status update. We're at bf uh.

98
00:05:31,839 --> 00:05:36,440
Speaker 1: We'll tell us about how that friendship evolved from working together,

99
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:38,479
Speaker 1: because a lot of times when you work on shows

100
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:41,680
Speaker 1: or productions, you know, you make good friends and then

101
00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:43,800
Speaker 1: it's kind of like sleepaway camp. You go back to

102
00:05:43,839 --> 00:05:46,599
Speaker 1: your real lives and then you kind of forget about

103
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:49,839
Speaker 1: those people, but you hold onto the memories. It's that's

104
00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:52,839
Speaker 1: very true. That's most of the time. Yeah. I actually

105
00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:55,400
Speaker 1: remember going to sleep away camp once when I was

106
00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:58,279
Speaker 1: in fourth or fifth grade. It was Hebrew sleepaway camp,

107
00:05:58,360 --> 00:06:01,400
Speaker 1: so just to add that little X through a nutcluster,

108
00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:05,000
Speaker 1: and and I was so excited, like it was, you know,

109
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:08,400
Speaker 1: just sleepover to like girl time, like so many girls,

110
00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:10,400
Speaker 1: and they were all from my school, and none of

111
00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,560
Speaker 1: us were really close friends. We were all in different

112
00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:15,320
Speaker 1: social groups. And then we went to sleep away camp

113
00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:18,080
Speaker 1: for one weekend. It was just like a one weekend retreat,

114
00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:21,560
Speaker 1: but we all bonded so much that when we got

115
00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:24,120
Speaker 1: back to school, I was like, oh my god, we're

116
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:25,960
Speaker 1: like we're all in this new group. And then it

117
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:28,600
Speaker 1: just kind of petered out, and I remember feeling so

118
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:32,039
Speaker 1: disappointed as a young girl that we couldn't continue that well.

119
00:06:32,080 --> 00:06:34,159
Speaker 1: You know, early in my career, I did this movie

120
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:37,839
Speaker 1: Walk Hard with John c Riley, and he kind of

121
00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:40,680
Speaker 1: took me aside midway through. He was very much a

122
00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:44,919
Speaker 1: mentor to me, just a wonderful, wonderful guide with acting

123
00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:47,480
Speaker 1: technique and all kinds of things. But about midway through,

124
00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:51,160
Speaker 1: he just sort of very gently said to me, you know, Jenna,

125
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:54,039
Speaker 1: I don't know how to say it, but like, this

126
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:58,200
Speaker 1: isn't real life life on the set, the friends you're making,

127
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,839
Speaker 1: the connect and you're making here, this isn't your real life.

128
00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:06,080
Speaker 1: Your real life is the other thing, not the movie.

129
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:09,680
Speaker 1: And I was like, what do you mean. These are

130
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,720
Speaker 1: my very best friends and they're going to be my

131
00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,560
Speaker 1: very best friends for ever and ever and ever were

132
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,720
Speaker 1: bonded for life. And it was such a wake up

133
00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:20,240
Speaker 1: call because he was right, and it was a great

134
00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:23,360
Speaker 1: lesson to learn too, because I think in the entertainment

135
00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:27,560
Speaker 1: industry a lot of times I don't know that the

136
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:30,040
Speaker 1: friendships you're making, or the bonds you're making on a

137
00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:33,760
Speaker 1: particular artistic project. It's really good to remember that you

138
00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:36,640
Speaker 1: have to really put down roots in your real life.

139
00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:40,840
Speaker 1: You have to have friendships that aren't associated with the

140
00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:44,840
Speaker 1: project you're working on. And I guess I'm saying all

141
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:47,520
Speaker 1: that and now I'm realizing that my very best friendship

142
00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:50,720
Speaker 1: is Angela Kinsey, who I met on a set and

143
00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:53,360
Speaker 1: who is now my business partner. So I don't know.

144
00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:56,120
Speaker 1: I guess, well, I think I think we have a

145
00:07:56,120 --> 00:07:59,440
Speaker 1: really good balance because I just I collect people everywhere,

146
00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:01,360
Speaker 1: and I want you all to go with me everywhere.

147
00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:03,440
Speaker 1: And then I bug you and I texted you probably

148
00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:06,840
Speaker 1: too much, and I overshare and and and I just

149
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,120
Speaker 1: want you all to be with me all the time. Really,

150
00:08:09,600 --> 00:08:11,720
Speaker 1: so I think Jenn and I are a nice balance

151
00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,800
Speaker 1: like that. She says when we were on set that

152
00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:16,720
Speaker 1: I just I talked to you into being my friend,

153
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:19,920
Speaker 1: Like I just wouldn't stop talking to you pretty much.

154
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:23,600
Speaker 1: You did, And I'm I'm more shy and I have

155
00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:26,000
Speaker 1: a lot of social anxiety, and so to have this

156
00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:29,920
Speaker 1: person that was just warm and chatty and open and

157
00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:33,560
Speaker 1: never stopped talking to me, I just was like drawn

158
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:36,319
Speaker 1: to that, like moth to a flame. I was like, yes,

159
00:08:36,520 --> 00:08:40,240
Speaker 1: this is great. And then you know, we went through

160
00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:45,440
Speaker 1: this crazy thing together, this show becoming successful. It was

161
00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:49,920
Speaker 1: both of our first regular television jobs, and so we

162
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:54,000
Speaker 1: were able to navigate all of that together. But more

163
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:57,680
Speaker 1: than anything, we were the same kind of person, right,

164
00:08:57,760 --> 00:09:02,200
Speaker 1: and like we were target on the weekends and going

165
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:05,120
Speaker 1: to do like what do you call those where you

166
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:08,040
Speaker 1: like paint a picture and drink wine like we wine

167
00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:13,679
Speaker 1: and Kivas night night. We were for it. Give me

168
00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,400
Speaker 1: sign me up for sip and stitch. We're gonna do one.

169
00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:20,320
Speaker 1: I mean, I just yeah, no. We we both sort

170
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:23,880
Speaker 1: of had the same life experience in a way, like

171
00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:26,280
Speaker 1: our our families and how we grew up. And even

172
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:28,240
Speaker 1: though we you know, I grew up all over and

173
00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:31,360
Speaker 1: some of the locations weren't the same, sort of the

174
00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:34,120
Speaker 1: heart of how we related to the world was the same.

175
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:38,000
Speaker 1: And how we processed the show taking off and how

176
00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:40,680
Speaker 1: that changed our lives. But one of the things I'm

177
00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:43,960
Speaker 1: so proud of in our friendship is the commitment we

178
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:47,400
Speaker 1: have to our friendship. And you know, it's like any

179
00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:49,800
Speaker 1: any other relationship in your life. The work you put

180
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:52,320
Speaker 1: in it is what you get out. And as the

181
00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:54,200
Speaker 1: show ended and all of a sudden, we had this

182
00:09:54,240 --> 00:09:56,480
Speaker 1: place where we always saw each other and that was gone.

183
00:09:56,840 --> 00:09:58,960
Speaker 1: So it was up to us after that, how do

184
00:09:59,040 --> 00:10:01,120
Speaker 1: we maintain this French ship? How do we keep it going?

185
00:10:01,160 --> 00:10:03,360
Speaker 1: What does it mean to us? And it's one of

186
00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:05,520
Speaker 1: the joys of my life, the work we put into

187
00:10:05,559 --> 00:10:07,679
Speaker 1: it and what we get back from it, and I'm

188
00:10:07,880 --> 00:10:10,199
Speaker 1: always so thankful for it. We'll talk to us a

189
00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:12,800
Speaker 1: little bit about like what that commitment means for each

190
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:17,800
Speaker 1: of you checking in really sharing and sharing because it's

191
00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:20,080
Speaker 1: I feel like, how people grow really close to you

192
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:23,480
Speaker 1: as a shared life experience, and whether or not your

193
00:10:23,520 --> 00:10:26,520
Speaker 1: journey is the same, you're sharing your life experience on

194
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:28,840
Speaker 1: any day, I know what Jenna's day was like. I

195
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:31,120
Speaker 1: know what her week was like, even when we've been

196
00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:34,360
Speaker 1: way apart working. You know, like when Jenna, when you

197
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,960
Speaker 1: were in London and I was in Vancouver, I knew

198
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:40,280
Speaker 1: the sound her feet made on her walk every day

199
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:42,360
Speaker 1: and I grew to look forward to it. You know,

200
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,760
Speaker 1: at first it was annoying. I was like it was

201
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:45,880
Speaker 1: kind of some crunchy rock. But then I was like,

202
00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:48,160
Speaker 1: oh I miss that crunchy rock and I need to

203
00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:52,040
Speaker 1: hear it. But right, Jenna, like, we just we stay connected.

204
00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:54,200
Speaker 1: We journal out loud to each other all the time

205
00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,600
Speaker 1: about the big stuff, the small stuff. All of it

206
00:10:56,720 --> 00:11:00,040
Speaker 1: is welcome. Yeah. I think a lot of what and

207
00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:03,240
Speaker 1: nexus as friends is sharing the small stuff. And like

208
00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:06,960
Speaker 1: Angela said, journaling out loud. We used to write each

209
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:11,800
Speaker 1: other journal like emails, and then we moved into audio messages,

210
00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:15,360
Speaker 1: which is how we do it now. And Angela just

211
00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:18,440
Speaker 1: audio messaged me about her ceiling today. She had a

212
00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:21,319
Speaker 1: big water leak and she gave me all the guys,

213
00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,440
Speaker 1: the ceiling is going in today. I've I've been waiting

214
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:28,320
Speaker 1: weeks for this because I'm so invested in Angela's ceiling

215
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:31,640
Speaker 1: for her, because we tell each other all the small stuff.

216
00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:35,199
Speaker 1: Do you guys use Marco Polo? That's a video messaging app? No,

217
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:39,240
Speaker 1: I know it, I know Marco Polo, but yeah, it

218
00:11:39,280 --> 00:11:41,120
Speaker 1: sounds like that would be a good app for you too,

219
00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,800
Speaker 1: because then you can visually see each other talking wherever

220
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:45,559
Speaker 1: you are, and then you can show her the ceiling

221
00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:48,360
Speaker 1: being the installation of the ceiling. Like, it's a nice

222
00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,280
Speaker 1: way to check in with your friends and family when

223
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,240
Speaker 1: you're on vacation anywhere, really, so they know what you're

224
00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:55,760
Speaker 1: up to. You don't have to like message back in

225
00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,679
Speaker 1: real time. It's like when you get the message, you

226
00:11:57,880 --> 00:11:59,720
Speaker 1: message back. I do that with a lot of my friends.

227
00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:02,600
Speaker 1: It's a atty great form of communication. It's almost like

228
00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:05,960
Speaker 1: if you could leave a voicemail when face timing. Yeah,

229
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:09,800
Speaker 1: it's like a FaceTime voicemail basically, Oh, I'm in, I'm in.

230
00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:13,000
Speaker 1: What's nice about it? Is like, well, when I see

231
00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,040
Speaker 1: that come in I'll wait until I have a minute

232
00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:19,680
Speaker 1: to digest it so you can really can accept the message.

233
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:23,160
Speaker 1: And there's also sometimes messages where I'm like, you're gonna

234
00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,160
Speaker 1: need to make sure no one's around when you listen

235
00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:29,080
Speaker 1: to this one. Yeah, you know those are my favorite. Yeah,

236
00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:32,400
Speaker 1: obviously I like what you're saying about friendship because we've

237
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:35,160
Speaker 1: talked about this before, Catherine, about Renee Brown. I think

238
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:37,400
Speaker 1: it is talks about the marble jar and how, you know,

239
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,760
Speaker 1: things develop and cultivate over time. And it's not about

240
00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:44,800
Speaker 1: like necessarily instant connections and all of those things, because

241
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:47,840
Speaker 1: those can be fleeting. It's about time spent, you know,

242
00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:52,440
Speaker 1: time quality, time spent repetitively, not just a few times

243
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:54,280
Speaker 1: or a couple of times. It's about all the small

244
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,600
Speaker 1: moments along with the big moments and the consistency of

245
00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:01,880
Speaker 1: it that leads to like a real, real worthwhile friendship.

246
00:13:02,559 --> 00:13:05,480
Speaker 1: I think that's true. I feel like I always know

247
00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:07,840
Speaker 1: that Jenna is going to show up for me, and

248
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:10,760
Speaker 1: I don't know that about everybody. You know, like I

249
00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:14,160
Speaker 1: am someone that I love meeting people and hearing their

250
00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:16,840
Speaker 1: stories and kind of collecting this group of people. But

251
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:18,960
Speaker 1: then you have this small inner circle that you know

252
00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:21,240
Speaker 1: is going to show up in Jenna's top of the list,

253
00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:23,760
Speaker 1: and that makes me feel good in the world. That

254
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:27,200
Speaker 1: makes me feel safe, and she makes me feel safe

255
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:31,280
Speaker 1: a lot. You know that's great, Jenna. Oh well, I

256
00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:35,480
Speaker 1: mean that's Angela for me too. There's an unconditional love

257
00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:39,880
Speaker 1: that comes with Angela's friendship that makes me feel like

258
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:44,920
Speaker 1: I can be the parts of myself that aren't so polished,

259
00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:47,320
Speaker 1: the parts of myself that I am may be ashamed

260
00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:50,640
Speaker 1: of or embarrassed by. I can make those mistakes with her,

261
00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:55,560
Speaker 1: and she's she doesn't judge, She's there to just love

262
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:58,920
Speaker 1: me through even my worst moments. Yeah. I think that's

263
00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:01,600
Speaker 1: the gift that everybody they wants, right as somebody who

264
00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:04,040
Speaker 1: can see you at your worst and love you nonetheless.

265
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,720
Speaker 1: And also the lack of judgment is nice because I

266
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:11,040
Speaker 1: noticed in different dynamics with girlfriends of mine or friends

267
00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:14,240
Speaker 1: of mine or associates of mine. You know, sometimes I'm

268
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:18,360
Speaker 1: very judgmental, and sometimes I am so forgiving, like not

269
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,680
Speaker 1: even forgiving is it the right word, but the opposite

270
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:24,240
Speaker 1: of being judgmental, you know, generous, Yeah, just generous of

271
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:27,480
Speaker 1: spirit really, like not ever thinking that any of their

272
00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:31,200
Speaker 1: behavior is ever going to like break us or judging

273
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:35,160
Speaker 1: them for it, you know, loving them through it. So judgmental,

274
00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:38,160
Speaker 1: Like being judgmental is a very tricky kind of balance.

275
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,080
Speaker 1: Well for me it is anyway, because I used to

276
00:14:40,120 --> 00:14:42,960
Speaker 1: be super judgmental, and I've tried to tone that down.

277
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:46,600
Speaker 1: You know, sometimes I'm very successful and sometimes I'm less successful.

278
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,440
Speaker 1: Well that's that's just everybody, right. I Mean it's like

279
00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:54,000
Speaker 1: some days I'm like, I'm crushing it today as a human,

280
00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:56,000
Speaker 1: and then other days I'm like, what a piece of crap?

281
00:14:56,560 --> 00:15:00,760
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm just I'm curious. How did you do that? Chelsea?

282
00:15:00,880 --> 00:15:03,280
Speaker 1: Was that like a conscious decision? Did you decide to

283
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,640
Speaker 1: take that on one year as a goal, and like,

284
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:07,920
Speaker 1: what are some of the things you did? Well? I

285
00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:10,560
Speaker 1: went to therapy and realized, like I you know, I

286
00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:13,080
Speaker 1: went into like serious therapy for about a year and

287
00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:16,000
Speaker 1: a half when I just became so angry and kind

288
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,280
Speaker 1: of like, you know, just I had no patience for people.

289
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,440
Speaker 1: Everyone annoyed the funk out of me. I mean, people

290
00:15:20,440 --> 00:15:22,600
Speaker 1: still really annoy me. I don't know if that's ever

291
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:25,880
Speaker 1: going to go away completely, but I have a much

292
00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:29,320
Speaker 1: more like loving attitude now. About people and I understand

293
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:31,440
Speaker 1: that people go through things, you know, that you don't

294
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:33,800
Speaker 1: know anything about, and I just was a little bit

295
00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:36,160
Speaker 1: up my own ass. So I had to just kind

296
00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:40,680
Speaker 1: of expand my my thoughtfulness and really understand that everybody

297
00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:43,880
Speaker 1: is going through something and most oftentimes you're not going

298
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:46,680
Speaker 1: to know what that is, and to be empathetic, which

299
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:49,560
Speaker 1: is something I kind of really lacked empathy, and to

300
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:53,360
Speaker 1: cultivate that. The exciting news was that it's possible to

301
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:57,440
Speaker 1: cultivate empathy when you are deficient in a category like that.

302
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:00,520
Speaker 1: There are skills and ways to remember that. You know,

303
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,560
Speaker 1: everybody has their own life. Everybody has their own set

304
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:07,200
Speaker 1: of problems, their families, their history that you don't know

305
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:10,400
Speaker 1: anything about, and to be more patient with people, really,

306
00:16:10,720 --> 00:16:13,520
Speaker 1: and it feels so good to be able to love

307
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:17,280
Speaker 1: someone when they're acting badly, you know what I mean,

308
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:20,560
Speaker 1: When somebody feels terrible about the way they're behaving, where

309
00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:23,320
Speaker 1: they're having an outburst, it feels so generous to be

310
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:25,600
Speaker 1: able to sit with them and be like, it's everything's

311
00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:27,760
Speaker 1: gonna be okay. You're gonna be okay, and you know,

312
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:30,680
Speaker 1: and so that reaps its own set of rewards. I

313
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:35,120
Speaker 1: think mm hmm, yeah, I mean I feel like one

314
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,040
Speaker 1: of the things that you know, I mean, I feel

315
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:39,680
Speaker 1: like that you and I have is we can be

316
00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:43,320
Speaker 1: really honest with each other and we've given ourselves the

317
00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:46,520
Speaker 1: room and our friendship to just take it in and

318
00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:48,560
Speaker 1: because it comes from a loving place, it's sort of

319
00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:51,640
Speaker 1: like that thing you were saying Chelsea about like having compassion.

320
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:55,320
Speaker 1: And we're not a perfect friendship, you know, we're a

321
00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:59,480
Speaker 1: working friendship and we do the best we can. We

322
00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,400
Speaker 1: care for each other and we always come at it

323
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:05,240
Speaker 1: from that space. So I wouldn't want anyone listening to

324
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,520
Speaker 1: think that it's always been smooth sailing, because anything worth

325
00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:10,639
Speaker 1: anything takes work, and there's gonna be days where you

326
00:17:10,680 --> 00:17:12,600
Speaker 1: get on each other's nerves and things that you work

327
00:17:12,680 --> 00:17:16,960
Speaker 1: through as friends. But it's always been just so rewarding

328
00:17:17,320 --> 00:17:19,040
Speaker 1: that I can go to Jenna with anything and she

329
00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:21,760
Speaker 1: can come to me and she hears me, and she'll

330
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:23,840
Speaker 1: we own whatever part of it we own and then

331
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:27,240
Speaker 1: we get past it, and um, it's something I'm I

332
00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:29,000
Speaker 1: don't know, jennat always means a lot to me that

333
00:17:29,080 --> 00:17:31,040
Speaker 1: I know I can go to you that that that

334
00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:33,959
Speaker 1: I feel so comfortable in our friendship that I can

335
00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:35,520
Speaker 1: even go to you with things where I'm like, hey,

336
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:38,320
Speaker 1: you know what that bugged me? Or you can do

337
00:17:38,359 --> 00:17:40,920
Speaker 1: the same and we get through it. Yeah, We've also

338
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:46,959
Speaker 1: started conversations like this, like I've said, hey, I have

339
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:50,679
Speaker 1: to talk to you about something. Something's bothering me and

340
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:54,159
Speaker 1: it might be me, it might be my ship. But

341
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,639
Speaker 1: can I say it out loud and maybe we figure

342
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,879
Speaker 1: it out together, like what part of it might be you?

343
00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:01,560
Speaker 1: What part of it is Maybe it's all me, Like

344
00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:03,920
Speaker 1: I'm I'm coming at this, but like I've been holding

345
00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:06,359
Speaker 1: it for long enough now and I'm not figuring it

346
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:09,639
Speaker 1: out by myself, And so can I just bring it

347
00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,919
Speaker 1: to the friendship and as soon as I say it,

348
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,600
Speaker 1: I might feel embarrassed, because sometimes that happens, like as

349
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:19,600
Speaker 1: soon as you say it, you see it. And and

350
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,119
Speaker 1: so I am so grateful that our friendship and our

351
00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:25,520
Speaker 1: friendship did not start that way. In fact, I almost

352
00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:29,880
Speaker 1: feel like some of these bigger, deeper kind of conversations

353
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:33,880
Speaker 1: have happened since we went into business together. Because when

354
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,200
Speaker 1: you're running a business together and you're presenting a business

355
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:40,719
Speaker 1: to other people, the stakes are a little higher, and

356
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:42,679
Speaker 1: so I that's one of the things that being in

357
00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:46,320
Speaker 1: business together has brought our friendship. It's I feel like

358
00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:50,280
Speaker 1: even even deeper, yeah, because the dynamic shifts. But I

359
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:52,800
Speaker 1: love what you said. I love that intro into getting

360
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,320
Speaker 1: into a difficult conversation. We haven't had to have any difficult,

361
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:59,159
Speaker 1: really difficult conversations yet, Katherine, but I hope to have

362
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,199
Speaker 1: some soon. So we just started, we became friends, we

363
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:06,680
Speaker 1: started working together, and then we became friends. So it's

364
00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:10,679
Speaker 1: the opposite. Well no, it's not the opposite, yeah, but

365
00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:12,840
Speaker 1: you can work together and then became friends and then

366
00:19:12,840 --> 00:19:16,720
Speaker 1: decided us to work together again. Well, the differences though,

367
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,200
Speaker 1: is we were we were co workers together. We both

368
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:23,520
Speaker 1: worked for someone else, right, and really my work ethic

369
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:27,160
Speaker 1: didn't affect Jenna's or vice versa. The way we approach

370
00:19:27,160 --> 00:19:30,760
Speaker 1: work didn't affect each other. But then, you know, we

371
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,920
Speaker 1: had our friendship which was really solid. But then when

372
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:35,480
Speaker 1: we started to run our own business together, well, now

373
00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 1: it's like that's it. It's just me and Jenna, and

374
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:41,560
Speaker 1: we directly affect one another. How we work, how we

375
00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:44,920
Speaker 1: process information, how we go into a meeting, it's all together.

376
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:48,000
Speaker 1: And that was a real learning curve too. Because we

377
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:52,679
Speaker 1: do process information and work very differently. But I also

378
00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:56,159
Speaker 1: think we complement each other really well. Yeah, we have

379
00:19:56,359 --> 00:20:01,280
Speaker 1: very similar work ethics. We're hard workers, but we approach

380
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:05,679
Speaker 1: how we organize work differently. And it's when you go

381
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,800
Speaker 1: into business with a friend as well. It creates so

382
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:12,600
Speaker 1: many more opportunities for friction and you know, kind of

383
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:15,240
Speaker 1: rubbing against each other the wrong way. So was there

384
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:18,320
Speaker 1: anything that you really had to work through from that perspective?

385
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,439
Speaker 1: I mean not at first. At first though, every person

386
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:25,000
Speaker 1: I told that we were going into business together was like,

387
00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,879
Speaker 1: do you think that that's a good Are you crazy?

388
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:33,480
Speaker 1: Are you worried for your friendship? And even our husbands

389
00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:37,119
Speaker 1: were worried. I think mostly because they need us to

390
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:40,360
Speaker 1: be friends. They need Angela and I to be best

391
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:45,600
Speaker 1: friends because we are helpful in like not making them everything,

392
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,919
Speaker 1: you know, like they're not our only friends, so we

393
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,520
Speaker 1: have each other for the big stuff. But I think

394
00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:53,520
Speaker 1: it wasn't until we started getting into it where yeah,

395
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:58,119
Speaker 1: it was mostly how we work. Angela is a night owl.

396
00:20:58,359 --> 00:21:01,360
Speaker 1: I am a morning person. Yeah, like when when we

397
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:04,320
Speaker 1: swap information, because you know, our our podcast, Jenna and

398
00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:06,879
Speaker 1: I break down every episode ourselves. We go through it,

399
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,040
Speaker 1: we reach out to people ourselves, we kind of come

400
00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:11,919
Speaker 1: out with an outline of who takes what, and so

401
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:14,159
Speaker 1: I would get this creative burst at like ten o'clock

402
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:16,199
Speaker 1: at night, nights ender all these ideas, and she'd be like,

403
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:19,320
Speaker 1: I need do to buck it up because my brain

404
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,960
Speaker 1: is shutting off. And then Jenna, it's like when her

405
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,520
Speaker 1: eyes opened, her brain is going like in the morning,

406
00:21:24,560 --> 00:21:26,600
Speaker 1: her eyes are open and she's ready to talk, and

407
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:30,040
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, no, I need time to get

408
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,159
Speaker 1: into this day. And that was some of the learning

409
00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:35,359
Speaker 1: curve that we had. So you need to have meetings

410
00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:39,160
Speaker 1: at like two pm, just like this is our happy

411
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:44,639
Speaker 1: time right here. That's good to identify that. When people

412
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 1: had reluctance regarding you guys working together, did you talk

413
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: about that openly? Yeah. We both came to each other

414
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:53,680
Speaker 1: and I was like, I was like, Jenna, Josh thinks

415
00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:55,120
Speaker 1: this could be a bad idea, and She's like, oh

416
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:57,720
Speaker 1: my god, Li said the same thing, and neither of

417
00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:00,800
Speaker 1: us had any reservation, Like I had nothing. You know,

418
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:03,680
Speaker 1: sometimes you approach something new and you're like you get

419
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:06,879
Speaker 1: that feeling. I had none of that. I just felt excitement,

420
00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,160
Speaker 1: and usually that means this is, you know, a good

421
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:13,600
Speaker 1: thing when everything in your body is like yes, yes, yes, yeah.

422
00:22:13,680 --> 00:22:16,199
Speaker 1: I think whether you're in a married couple and you

423
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: work together, our friendship duo and you work together, I

424
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:22,359
Speaker 1: think some people can work together and some people can't.

425
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,040
Speaker 1: You know, some people can have a great marriage or

426
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:27,160
Speaker 1: a friendship and they can't work together, or maybe they're

427
00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,119
Speaker 1: like on the verge of divorce but their business is

428
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,480
Speaker 1: going great. It's like, you know, I don't think it

429
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,760
Speaker 1: necessarily reflects on the relationship, but it can be really

430
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,159
Speaker 1: difficult to work with somebody that you deeply care for,

431
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:40,080
Speaker 1: that you like. Catherine's husband edits our podcast and he's

432
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:42,320
Speaker 1: our sound engineer and I'm sleeping with him now too.

433
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,960
Speaker 1: So things I've gotten pretty fucked up around here got

434
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:50,159
Speaker 1: me a thank you for saying throuble before I had to,

435
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:53,960
Speaker 1: because that is the word of the decade for me,

436
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:59,000
Speaker 1: especially I'm everyone's third wheel. Actually, we have a pretty

437
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:03,640
Speaker 1: interesting question coming up today that I want to say

438
00:23:03,720 --> 00:23:06,160
Speaker 1: before we start. We're gonna go right into these questions

439
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:08,960
Speaker 1: and we have callers and people calling for real advice. Girls.

440
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:12,200
Speaker 1: But it's so nice to have such a wholesome group

441
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:15,119
Speaker 1: of girls here today, like, you guys are really gonna

442
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,480
Speaker 1: be You guys are gonna dig this. I could tell

443
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:20,200
Speaker 1: because you're really I could tell you're gonna care about

444
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:23,840
Speaker 1: these people and this is gonna be fun. Yes, okay, Well,

445
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 1: before we get to questions, we'll take a quick break

446
00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:35,120
Speaker 1: and we'll be right back and we're back fantastic. Our

447
00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:37,600
Speaker 1: first question bred we're going to go right into the

448
00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:44,960
Speaker 1: collar just for time. Is Brad your husband my husband.

449
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:47,440
Speaker 1: I get to tell him what to do, and it's great.

450
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 1: I've seen you should have seen our hug in the hallway.

451
00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 1: He went to hug me on the side and I

452
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:53,800
Speaker 1: went around the corner and then we just both just

453
00:23:54,840 --> 00:24:01,200
Speaker 1: hit I mean, he's a good hugger. Well, we missed

454
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 1: that one this morning. I'll have to try again when

455
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 1: I leave. Well, this is Bella. She's twenty two. Her

456
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:15,120
Speaker 1: subject line is and I love avoidant or am I right?

457
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:19,199
Speaker 1: So she had written into the show, and some developments

458
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:21,560
Speaker 1: happened before she wrote in again or before I reached

459
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,920
Speaker 1: out to her. Um. She wrote in about a long

460
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,800
Speaker 1: distance relationship she was in and she wasn't totally sure

461
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,720
Speaker 1: it was right for her. They would have a great

462
00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:31,200
Speaker 1: time when they were together, but after he left, she'd

463
00:24:31,240 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 1: find herself thinking about being single. Complicating matters, they were

464
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:37,440
Speaker 1: working on a short film together and he had helped

465
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,119
Speaker 1: her through the loss of her father to cancer. She

466
00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:42,920
Speaker 1: felt that he was a wonderful partner, but couldn't really

467
00:24:42,960 --> 00:24:45,760
Speaker 1: figure out what was wrong, and she had asked, am

468
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:48,439
Speaker 1: I trying to avoid a love that's too good for me?

469
00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:51,280
Speaker 1: Or is this feeling I get when we're apart right?

470
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,119
Speaker 1: And now is the time for me to be single?

471
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,320
Speaker 1: Then she wrote in again. A couple of weeks ago,

472
00:24:56,359 --> 00:24:58,840
Speaker 1: I left my long distance relationship with my boyfriend of

473
00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:01,040
Speaker 1: two years, and it was the best decision I could

474
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 1: have made. I loved him, but my longing for independence

475
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:06,200
Speaker 1: grew bigger and bigger, and I couldn't let another day

476
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:09,240
Speaker 1: go by abandoning myself. He and I were great friends

477
00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 1: before we dated, and we'd love to resume that friendship

478
00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:13,919
Speaker 1: when the time is right. Can you help me with

479
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,160
Speaker 1: those next steps? I know it would be a few

480
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,280
Speaker 1: months down the line, but I'm a planner and I

481
00:25:18,320 --> 00:25:20,880
Speaker 1: would like to hear your advice. How should I approach

482
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 1: establishing new friendship boundaries with him? Should I be conscious

483
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 1: of how much time I spend with him. He was

484
00:25:26,119 --> 00:25:28,680
Speaker 1: more upset about the breakup than I was, because mentally

485
00:25:28,720 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 1: I had left the relationship when I wrote my first email,

486
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:35,000
Speaker 1: I can't wait to hear from you. Bella, Hi, Bella, Hi,

487
00:25:35,119 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 1: bigg Hi. Oh my gosh, I'm so happy to be here.

488
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:41,280
Speaker 1: I know, look at all the women here to give

489
00:25:41,359 --> 00:25:47,359
Speaker 1: you a Yes, ladies, ladies. Okay, So to your relationship,

490
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:50,520
Speaker 1: he must have, that must have? Really? Was he surprised? Yeah,

491
00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:54,440
Speaker 1: which I was surprised. I live in New Jersey or

492
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,680
Speaker 1: I just did. I'm on a road trip moving back

493
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 1: to a led pursue. Good for you forgetting the funk

494
00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:03,200
Speaker 1: out of it, right. We did it, We made it out.

495
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:05,240
Speaker 1: I could only say that because it's my home state,

496
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:09,520
Speaker 1: of course, And so earlier this month, I went to

497
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,840
Speaker 1: l A to visit some friends and I wanted to

498
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:15,359
Speaker 1: see the house that I was moving into, and a

499
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:17,640
Speaker 1: couple of days before I went, that's also where he lives.

500
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:19,760
Speaker 1: A couple of days before I went, I was like, hey,

501
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:22,959
Speaker 1: I need some space. I don't want to talk. I

502
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 1: just feel very confused. And I was open with him

503
00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:28,199
Speaker 1: about how I was, you know, questioning our relationship kind

504
00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 1: of on and off, and he was like, okay, of

505
00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:32,760
Speaker 1: course yeah. And then I got there and I broke

506
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 1: up with him, and he was accepting, but then also

507
00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:39,280
Speaker 1: expected that the whole time I was in l A

508
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 1: would be like our lovers goodbye, we would be hanging

509
00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:45,119
Speaker 1: out the whole time. And I did hang out with

510
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:48,880
Speaker 1: him the first day, but then I had to kind

511
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,479
Speaker 1: of back away, which he was very upset about. So

512
00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:54,840
Speaker 1: it was a little complicated, and I think it was

513
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:58,199
Speaker 1: one of those things that once I really honored my

514
00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:01,320
Speaker 1: knowing and what I wanted, I couldn't like look away

515
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:04,359
Speaker 1: and I couldn't unsee it. And for him, it was

516
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:06,400
Speaker 1: like he wanted to use this time to really hold

517
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,360
Speaker 1: on to what we've had and honor what we've had,

518
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:11,880
Speaker 1: and I think I've been doing that privately on my own.

519
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:17,040
Speaker 1: So I really love him, and I really appreciate him,

520
00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:20,280
Speaker 1: and I think we had a really beautiful relationship, but

521
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 1: it's time for me to move on. I don't see

522
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:27,000
Speaker 1: myself with him long term, you know, so I think

523
00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:29,680
Speaker 1: now more my question, especially about being friends with him.

524
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 1: This is one thing I was also realizing in my reflection,

525
00:27:32,520 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 1: was I changed parts of myself to really connect and

526
00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 1: click with him, and I think, like, when I'm thinking

527
00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:44,480
Speaker 1: about maintaining a friendship with him, I know I need

528
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:49,159
Speaker 1: time before that happens. But I think he's going to

529
00:27:49,320 --> 00:27:53,520
Speaker 1: meet a very different person as well, So I'm just wondering.

530
00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:57,400
Speaker 1: You know, he's more eclectic, He's very artsy, artsy, and

531
00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:59,439
Speaker 1: there are parts of me. I'm a poet, you know,

532
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 1: I'm arts as well. But I think there's parts of

533
00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:06,920
Speaker 1: me that I suppressed and then highlighted to really connect

534
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:11,040
Speaker 1: with him. Um, and now that I'm out of the relationship,

535
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:14,520
Speaker 1: I'm finding who I am again. I'm also twenty two,

536
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 1: you know, I just graduated college. I'm like in a

537
00:28:17,920 --> 00:28:22,439
Speaker 1: huge transitional period of my life. And yeah, I'm just

538
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 1: feeling a little anxious about moving to a city where

539
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:27,679
Speaker 1: he is. And I know he wants a friendship as well,

540
00:28:27,720 --> 00:28:30,959
Speaker 1: and I would be interested in that. But yeah, I

541
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,959
Speaker 1: just can't believe the vocabulary that twenty year old have

542
00:28:34,359 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 1: about their own feelings these days. I mean, I was

543
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:43,200
Speaker 1: drunk and high and did not have any reflection about anything.

544
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:49,480
Speaker 1: I was like forty, I mean, so igpressive. Thank you. Well,

545
00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 1: you know, you read Glenn and Doyle and your life

546
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:57,160
Speaker 1: changes and ground and you know, everything, just the whole

547
00:28:57,160 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 1: world shifts. So yeah, good, good for you. Well, I

548
00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 1: want to ask you one question before we all jump in.

549
00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:05,840
Speaker 1: So you kind of hinted at the things that you

550
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:08,640
Speaker 1: changed about yourself, but can you get into a couple

551
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:12,320
Speaker 1: more specifics about the things that you did change about

552
00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:18,600
Speaker 1: yourself to be more connected to him that bothered you. Yeah,

553
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:22,160
Speaker 1: he lives in the clouds, and I think I'm a

554
00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:25,560
Speaker 1: I'm a romantic as well, but I'm also very practical

555
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 1: and especially being an actor, being a writer, and having

556
00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 1: very big dreams for myself. I have a big hustle

557
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 1: because I know that for a while, I'm not going

558
00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:37,800
Speaker 1: to be making my living doing what I love. You know,

559
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:39,760
Speaker 1: I'm going to be working for free a lot. I'm

560
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 1: going to be doing theater and getting paid two hundred

561
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:43,760
Speaker 1: dollars a week, and I'm going to be so happy

562
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,240
Speaker 1: to do that. But you know, he didn't have a job,

563
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,120
Speaker 1: and I always did. I felt like I wasn't as

564
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:53,400
Speaker 1: motivated and in a hustle mindset when I was with him.

565
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:57,360
Speaker 1: He taught me how to slow down and smell the roses,

566
00:29:57,440 --> 00:30:00,479
Speaker 1: but I think I was doing that too much. Towards

567
00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:03,880
Speaker 1: the end of our relationship and I went on vacation

568
00:30:03,920 --> 00:30:06,120
Speaker 1: with him and my best friend, and now that we're

569
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:09,360
Speaker 1: broken up, she was like, that was so jarring for

570
00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:11,840
Speaker 1: me because I felt like seeing you two together, I

571
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,520
Speaker 1: was seeing the side of you that I would have

572
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:17,040
Speaker 1: never thought even existed. Like, he's not a planner. We

573
00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:19,600
Speaker 1: were going to San Francisco and he thought that we

574
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 1: could just like go and camp on the beach and

575
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:27,320
Speaker 1: like that's legal, and I left him to figure out

576
00:30:27,360 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: where we were camping. So then we got there and

577
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 1: the one job he had he just completely failed out,

578
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:34,960
Speaker 1: which I was like, oh, it's fine, it's cute. Oh god,

579
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 1: he's such a plan and like so lives moment moment.

580
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:41,560
Speaker 1: But no, that's something that I wouldn't appreciate and also

581
00:30:41,560 --> 00:30:43,640
Speaker 1: wouldn't think was cute. If that was like just a friend,

582
00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 1: I'd be like, you sucked us over, Like what are

583
00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,720
Speaker 1: we going to do now? So yeah, I think I

584
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:52,280
Speaker 1: was just a little bit more passive and let him

585
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 1: take the driver's seat. And I'm not that kind of

586
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 1: person just in general. And now I feel like I

587
00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 1: don't have a boyfriend, and like I said, I'm graduating college.

588
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: I also lost my dad earlier this year. He had

589
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:08,400
Speaker 1: brain cancer for two years, and you know that really

590
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 1: changes a person. Being twenty and having this like huge

591
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 1: dose of reality and so and losing him also obviously

592
00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:18,040
Speaker 1: changed me. So I'm like, looking around, I'm like, I

593
00:31:18,040 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 1: don't even know who I am anymore. And there's parts

594
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:23,760
Speaker 1: of myself that I especially lost in my relationship with him.

595
00:31:23,840 --> 00:31:27,880
Speaker 1: So now I'm just totally rebuilding, which I'm very excited

596
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: to do, but I do feel intimidated and I've been lost.

597
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm, well, thank you for your honest dates. I

598
00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:38,920
Speaker 1: I love everything you're saying, is I think so relatable

599
00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:41,240
Speaker 1: to anyone who's listening and to all women. You know,

600
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:43,400
Speaker 1: how many times have we all been in relationships where

601
00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:45,800
Speaker 1: we've given too much of ourselves away only to come

602
00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 1: back to ourselves or you know, every relationship you get

603
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,920
Speaker 1: out of and then you hear what everybody thinks about

604
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:54,280
Speaker 1: what the relationship was, and you're like, well, I wish

605
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 1: you would have told me that while I was in it.

606
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,400
Speaker 1: But thanks anyway. I feel like I'll go first and

607
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:02,160
Speaker 1: then everyone girls you can jump in. I think it's

608
00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:05,360
Speaker 1: so important to just respect his boundaries. Being the one

609
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:08,320
Speaker 1: that he was kind of broken up with, and letting

610
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:10,640
Speaker 1: him take the lead on the friendship part. I think

611
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:13,120
Speaker 1: you do need some time so you're not he's not

612
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 1: in love with you, because it's so hard to be

613
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 1: friends with somebody when you're still in love. You know,

614
00:32:17,960 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 1: it's kind of untenable and it's not it's not even

615
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,920
Speaker 1: nice to the other person. So I think you should

616
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:26,200
Speaker 1: definitely let him take the lead and you should take

617
00:32:26,240 --> 00:32:29,280
Speaker 1: some space in between that time that you become friends.

618
00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:31,720
Speaker 1: But you know, see what he wants, because a lot

619
00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:33,240
Speaker 1: of people say they want to be friends and then

620
00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:35,480
Speaker 1: they try and they can't, you know, and then they're like, oh,

621
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:37,520
Speaker 1: I can't do this, it's too soon, it's too much.

622
00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:41,240
Speaker 1: But yeah, I think respecting his boundaries since you're the

623
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:44,520
Speaker 1: one who's kind of, you know, blossoming out of the relationship,

624
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:46,719
Speaker 1: and he will too at some point, but maybe not

625
00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:50,280
Speaker 1: at the same pace that you are. Angela, what do

626
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:54,400
Speaker 1: you think, Well, you know, bellow, when you were talking

627
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:56,560
Speaker 1: at that one of the things that really stood out

628
00:32:56,600 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 1: to me, and like Telsea said, you were so well spoken.

629
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 1: I'm just like, my god, because I was not at

630
00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 1: twenty two. But one of the things you said that

631
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:07,240
Speaker 1: really stood out to me is just your feeling of

632
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 1: loss after your dad passed away. And you know, when

633
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:15,480
Speaker 1: my father passed away, it was like this life anchor disappeared,

634
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,360
Speaker 1: this thing that I was so tethered to that was

635
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 1: the calm and every storm, and it made me hold

636
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:23,720
Speaker 1: a mirror up to my whole life, all my relationships.

637
00:33:24,040 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: I just looked at differently through this filter of losing

638
00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:30,800
Speaker 1: my dad and just know that voice in you that

639
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:34,000
Speaker 1: knows when something's right for you and knows when it's not,

640
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:38,560
Speaker 1: and losing a parent like that magnifies that. And so

641
00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:41,240
Speaker 1: I feel like you are living your truth and I

642
00:33:41,280 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: think that's really good. And I think the thing I

643
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,560
Speaker 1: would tell you is that the loss of your dad

644
00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 1: will always be with you, and you're gonna have days

645
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 1: where it just hits you in waves, and days where

646
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:55,640
Speaker 1: you're okay, but you just look at everyone differently, and

647
00:33:55,680 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 1: I think that's okay. You just went through a big

648
00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:02,640
Speaker 1: thing and it put your relationship in perspective. I'm sure

649
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,640
Speaker 1: there were many things that put it in perspective, but

650
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:08,480
Speaker 1: I know that that had to contribute, you know, And

651
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 1: I just would say to be kind to yourself right

652
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 1: now and definitely don't rush into another one. That would

653
00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:17,600
Speaker 1: be my advice, you know, just take this time to

654
00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:20,040
Speaker 1: sort of regroup yourself and regroup how you're going to

655
00:34:20,120 --> 00:34:22,320
Speaker 1: navigate life without your dad and how you're going to

656
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:27,640
Speaker 1: navigate relationships without him as someone you turned to. Yeah, yeah,

657
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 1: I do. I feel that a lot, and thank you.

658
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:34,480
Speaker 1: I was having a conversation with my best friend yesterday,

659
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:37,080
Speaker 1: like I said, we're on this road trip moving back

660
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,839
Speaker 1: to l A. And she was really like, you don't

661
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 1: give yourself enough credit. And I was sitting in the

662
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 1: car like crying. I was like, I can't even accept

663
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:49,919
Speaker 1: that that's true, but I also have enough of a

664
00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 1: mirror up to me to know that it is. But yeah,

665
00:34:53,640 --> 00:34:56,760
Speaker 1: thank you very much. It's been it's been a ride.

666
00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:00,879
Speaker 1: I think that was probably I've noticed the most. I

667
00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:04,440
Speaker 1: was studying abroad in Germany and I came back after

668
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 1: his services and everything, and I was just looking at

669
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 1: all these people who are twenty and twenty one and

670
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:12,799
Speaker 1: just worrying about Win's margarite a picture hour and how

671
00:35:12,880 --> 00:35:15,360
Speaker 1: cheap for the drinks, and I'm like, oh my gosh,

672
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:20,120
Speaker 1: everything is changed for me forever. But I'm also very

673
00:35:20,160 --> 00:35:23,279
Speaker 1: grateful for it as well. I think it's very significant

674
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:26,279
Speaker 1: to my life journey and has played a very specific role,

675
00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:29,759
Speaker 1: and I do see more and more blessings from it.

676
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:34,399
Speaker 1: I mean, this is one of them. Yeah. Yeah, And

677
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:37,440
Speaker 1: I think just looking at a specific amount of time,

678
00:35:37,880 --> 00:35:40,040
Speaker 1: you know that you might want to let a lapse

679
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:43,160
Speaker 1: between now and when you can really start rebuilding a

680
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 1: friendship with this boyfriend, if and one that does happen.

681
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:47,920
Speaker 1: You know, I feel like, as a general rule, I

682
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,479
Speaker 1: usually say six months is a good amount of time

683
00:35:50,640 --> 00:35:54,399
Speaker 1: depending on how many hurt feelings there were for the

684
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 1: person who was dumped, But you know, you might find

685
00:35:57,520 --> 00:36:00,200
Speaker 1: it's three, four or five months. But I think good

686
00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:03,399
Speaker 1: way to step back into that could be group get

687
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:06,440
Speaker 1: together is like when the time is right. But also,

688
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:08,520
Speaker 1: you know, I think as the other girls here have said,

689
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,839
Speaker 1: like taking his cues on that, as long as it's

690
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:14,560
Speaker 1: not too soon, you know you might have to you know,

691
00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:17,360
Speaker 1: keep them, keep them at bay for a little while. Yeah,

692
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 1: because we really do have the same social circles. So

693
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:25,560
Speaker 1: like even this month big party time and my friends

694
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:28,120
Speaker 1: having a house swarming party, and there are things that

695
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:31,520
Speaker 1: I know that he's gonna be at. Is this something

696
00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:34,320
Speaker 1: that then I just say, like, I'm not going to

697
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,479
Speaker 1: go to that because I know he's there, because it's

698
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:40,719
Speaker 1: like a weird thing of do I communicate with him, Like, Hey,

699
00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know how to approach that part

700
00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,959
Speaker 1: of it to like just the logisticates of I don't

701
00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:47,799
Speaker 1: really want to be missing out on a whole part

702
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 1: of my social life and these fun parties. But I

703
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 1: also will acknowledge that, yeah, part of breaking up with

704
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:56,480
Speaker 1: someone and dating someone in your friend group is those

705
00:36:56,520 --> 00:36:59,319
Speaker 1: sacrifices will have to be made. But I don't know

706
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:02,799
Speaker 1: how to do that while not communicating with him and

707
00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:07,000
Speaker 1: just hope that that works out. Well. I think it's

708
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 1: okay to go to those sorts of things and you

709
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:11,720
Speaker 1: can be civil and say hi, but I would grab

710
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:14,400
Speaker 1: a good girlfriend just be like, hey, this is my

711
00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:16,879
Speaker 1: mL for tonight. I'm not trying to like have long

712
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:19,400
Speaker 1: drawn out conversations with him. It's like, can you just

713
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:22,560
Speaker 1: kind of have my back and keep me, keep me entertained,

714
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:25,920
Speaker 1: and be by my side for the evening and that way, hopefully,

715
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:27,600
Speaker 1: you know, if she sees you kind of getting into

716
00:37:27,640 --> 00:37:30,239
Speaker 1: something or going down a rabbit hole, she can pull

717
00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:31,880
Speaker 1: you away and say like, hey, let's go grab a

718
00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 1: drink or whatever. Okay, yeah, yeah, Because I think the

719
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: key is, like with breaking up and everything, like the

720
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:39,960
Speaker 1: best we can do is to be responsible with other

721
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:43,160
Speaker 1: people's feelings, right, Like, that's the best we could do,

722
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 1: to not be misleading, to not be irresponsible, get drunk

723
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 1: and make out with them irresponsibly, and so that that

724
00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 1: obfuscates the entire situation. You know, not that you're going

725
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:54,279
Speaker 1: to do that. You don't seem like the type of

726
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:56,839
Speaker 1: girl that's you know, that confused. But sometimes we can

727
00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:59,440
Speaker 1: do it. Men can do it too, obviously, but you know,

728
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 1: women can. We have this way that we can. Sometimes

729
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:04,480
Speaker 1: we don't regard people, we don't hold them in the

730
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 1: same regard that we would hold our own feelings. So

731
00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:09,080
Speaker 1: I think the most you know, thoughtful thing we can

732
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:11,959
Speaker 1: ever do when things are ending is just to hold

733
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:15,279
Speaker 1: those people's feelings is equal to ours and make sure

734
00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:17,720
Speaker 1: that we're not sending mixed messages. I'm sorry, I'm butting

735
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 1: my shirt right now. I don't know what's happening, but yeah,

736
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 1: just to be responsible about it. And even if you

737
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:24,640
Speaker 1: did want to communicate and say, hey, I just want

738
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,040
Speaker 1: to make sure you're okay with us going to this

739
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:28,239
Speaker 1: party together, like there's not gonna be any weird vibes.

740
00:38:28,280 --> 00:38:30,879
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously, you know you could always do that.

741
00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:35,760
Speaker 1: That's as long as it's friendly and not misleading, right, Yeah, Jenna,

742
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:37,360
Speaker 1: what do you think? Do you have any thoughts on

743
00:38:37,400 --> 00:38:40,520
Speaker 1: this subject? You know, I think you guys covered a

744
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: lot of it. And the one thing that I was

745
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 1: just going to say was that I really heard that

746
00:38:45,640 --> 00:38:48,719
Speaker 1: you are entering into a new season. It sounds like

747
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,680
Speaker 1: an ambitious one in your life. You have a lot

748
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:55,480
Speaker 1: of goals and visions for your life, and I want

749
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:58,000
Speaker 1: to wish you good luck and don't give up. I

750
00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:01,160
Speaker 1: have driven my car across the country in hopes of

751
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:05,719
Speaker 1: being an actress once, and you are right, you will

752
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 1: probably have some years of struggle and weird jobs and

753
00:39:10,040 --> 00:39:13,000
Speaker 1: patching things together, but I'll just say it's worth it.

754
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:16,879
Speaker 1: And if this is your calling, I really commend you

755
00:39:16,960 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 1: for being brave enough too to rise to the occasion

756
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:23,279
Speaker 1: and make the changes in your life that are necessary

757
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:26,799
Speaker 1: to follow that call. So good luck, You've got this,

758
00:39:27,000 --> 00:39:30,960
Speaker 1: So thank you so much. This is such an honor.

759
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:34,560
Speaker 1: I love your podcast, Chelsea and Catherine and I love

760
00:39:34,600 --> 00:39:38,120
Speaker 1: your podcast, ladies. I love the Office. My dad and

761
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:41,200
Speaker 1: I would watch together all the time. So I just

762
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:42,680
Speaker 1: I am such a fan of you all. I'm so

763
00:39:42,760 --> 00:39:45,239
Speaker 1: happy that this all worked out, and Catherine has been

764
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 1: lovely communicating likewise. Well, we're a fan of you. Now

765
00:39:48,760 --> 00:39:58,120
Speaker 1: to Bella, you're an A plus plus bellas God keep

766
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:00,719
Speaker 1: us posted on how it goes, and thank you so

767
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:06,239
Speaker 1: much for calling in and sharing with us. I have

768
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:13,560
Speaker 1: a great day, ladies. Well that was just delightful. I mean,

769
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:17,760
Speaker 1: what where did this? I just care these young people.

770
00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,319
Speaker 1: I'm so improud. I would be so proud of her

771
00:40:20,400 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 1: if she was my daughter, I'd be like, I am

772
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:25,440
Speaker 1: so flipping proud of you. They should make Untamed Glennon's

773
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:28,520
Speaker 1: book that should be curriculum like required reading for all

774
00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:31,960
Speaker 1: high school girls, because everybody who reads it. I mean,

775
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,719
Speaker 1: I don't think I've ever heard of anyone. Oh well,

776
00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:36,759
Speaker 1: some people aren't ready to hear it. Yes, I've heard

777
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:38,840
Speaker 1: some women go it's too much, it's too much, and

778
00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 1: you're like, you're the one who needs it the most.

779
00:40:41,200 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 1: You know when people have that reaction. Have you girls

780
00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:46,719
Speaker 1: both read her book? Glenn and Doyle. I haven't read it,

781
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 1: but I have friends who have read it and love it.

782
00:40:49,400 --> 00:40:51,960
Speaker 1: I follow her on Instagram though, and I love her. Yeah.

783
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,600
Speaker 1: She and Abby are so funny. And she has another book,

784
00:40:54,640 --> 00:40:56,799
Speaker 1: Love Warrior, and then I think there was one other

785
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:58,640
Speaker 1: one right before that, but I can't remember the name

786
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 1: of that, but yeah, and aimed as awesome. I actually

787
00:41:01,239 --> 00:41:04,040
Speaker 1: was in my work. We were there and one of

788
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,400
Speaker 1: my friends had it and I read three chapters again

789
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:08,920
Speaker 1: that I hadn't read before because I was looking for inspiration,

790
00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh god, yeah, it's so good.

791
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:15,560
Speaker 1: It's just yeah, it's great. Is it one of those

792
00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:19,399
Speaker 1: books where you can just flip open a chapter, Yeah,

793
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:22,239
Speaker 1: sort of essay style, so you don't have to read

794
00:41:22,239 --> 00:41:24,560
Speaker 1: it in order, and it'll just be like, oh wow,

795
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:27,239
Speaker 1: something just opened up in me. Yeah, you know in

796
00:41:27,280 --> 00:41:29,560
Speaker 1: those days where you need something, like you have to

797
00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:31,799
Speaker 1: just pick something. I love those books at too, where

798
00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:33,080
Speaker 1: you could just pick it up and you're like, what

799
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:35,080
Speaker 1: do I need to see and there's something in here

800
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:38,959
Speaker 1: that will help me right now? Yeah, it's like that, Yeah, oh, Jenna,

801
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 1: we need to get it. Also, I have a fourteen

802
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:42,960
Speaker 1: year old daughter now, and so I was just like,

803
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,359
Speaker 1: she hasn't had a crush. Yet you know, it's like

804
00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 1: it's still it's all very new, but I know those

805
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:51,440
Speaker 1: days are coming, and I want to be prepared to

806
00:41:51,760 --> 00:41:55,640
Speaker 1: be ready. It's a good thing to read along with

807
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,680
Speaker 1: another friend, you know. I had read it with my

808
00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:01,839
Speaker 1: sisters in law actually, and we would meet every week

809
00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:05,480
Speaker 1: after reading a few chapters, or virtually we'd meet on

810
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 1: zoom and we'd talk about it. It was just wonderful. Angela,

811
00:42:09,239 --> 00:42:13,240
Speaker 1: should we finally read a book together? I mean, listen,

812
00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:17,920
Speaker 1: any anything could happen. Maybe maybe we'll read a book together.

813
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,279
Speaker 1: Maybe we'll actually finally go to a yoga class. I

814
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:23,360
Speaker 1: can handle. Anything could happen. Yeah, after this podcast, you

815
00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:26,000
Speaker 1: guys can do a book podcast where you read books

816
00:42:26,040 --> 00:42:33,439
Speaker 1: together and do a book review. Well, we have one

817
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 1: more well actually two more collars. They are a pair

818
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 1: calling in together. This submission comes from Country Carly and

819
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:47,120
Speaker 1: April Showers. Dear Chelsea. To start, my best friend and

820
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,359
Speaker 1: I have been fans since we were thirteen years old,

821
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:52,839
Speaker 1: watching Chelsea lately during sleepovers. We have a situation. We'd

822
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 1: love your advice on a little backstory. One of us

823
00:42:56,040 --> 00:42:58,400
Speaker 1: is a nurse practitioner and has collected over a hundred

824
00:42:58,400 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 1: thousand dollars in student loan debt in this pursuit. The

825
00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:04,840
Speaker 1: other is recently divorced and is building a successful career

826
00:43:04,920 --> 00:43:07,520
Speaker 1: and event planning in NAPA. She's been on a health

827
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 1: journey to figure out the root cause behind her autoimmune

828
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:12,960
Speaker 1: disease so she can successfully manage her pcos and s

829
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:15,160
Speaker 1: I s S, and has accrued a healthy amount of

830
00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 1: debt in doing so. We're hoping for your advice as

831
00:43:18,719 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 1: we have thought of what we think might be a

832
00:43:20,680 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 1: great idea to get us out of debt and increase

833
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:26,000
Speaker 1: our quality of life. We decided we both want to

834
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:29,240
Speaker 1: start and only fans account and create an actual solid

835
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 1: business plan involving a photographer, videographer and account manager. We

836
00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:36,960
Speaker 1: want to maintain total anonymity, use fake names and alter

837
00:43:37,040 --> 00:43:40,600
Speaker 1: our appearance, and use social media accounts unrelated to either

838
00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:44,200
Speaker 1: of us. The only catches this photographer slash manager we

839
00:43:44,239 --> 00:43:47,160
Speaker 1: have in mind is someone one of us is newly dating.

840
00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:49,960
Speaker 1: We all feel like if we have clear rules and

841
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 1: legal contracts, we can all make money and maintain professional

842
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:56,600
Speaker 1: and personal boundaries. We're all very level headed, self aware,

843
00:43:56,719 --> 00:43:59,279
Speaker 1: pretty chill individuals that feel like we can truly be

844
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 1: successful this Are we crazy for thinking this? April is

845
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:05,920
Speaker 1: very comfortable with her sexuality and being naked, and I

846
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:08,200
Speaker 1: have often been called the nudest of the friend group

847
00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:11,120
Speaker 1: because I was raised in a European household that embraced

848
00:44:11,239 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 1: nudity and openness. The couple are both comfortable with the

849
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:17,000
Speaker 1: fact that he will be seeing me naked, and I

850
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:19,320
Speaker 1: believe that he's a solid guy that would be mature

851
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 1: about this. You inspired both of us to begin therapy

852
00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:24,520
Speaker 1: over the last couple of years, and we feel so

853
00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:26,560
Speaker 1: grateful to have the tools we have at such a

854
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:29,080
Speaker 1: young age. We're excited to free ourselves from debt and

855
00:44:29,120 --> 00:44:31,840
Speaker 1: pursue a healthier, more genuine, and happy life. With the

856
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:38,800
Speaker 1: money we will potentially make. Carly country and April showers. Hi. Hi,

857
00:44:39,280 --> 00:44:48,160
Speaker 1: Hi Carly in April, Hi, ladies him Let's go, Hi

858
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:58,320
Speaker 1: girl perfect. I have a quick first question, because I'm

859
00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:01,600
Speaker 1: almost a hundred years old, I'm pretty sure I know

860
00:45:01,840 --> 00:45:08,799
Speaker 1: what it's only friends is only fans. I'm pretty sure

861
00:45:08,840 --> 00:45:11,120
Speaker 1: I read an article about it, or listen to a

862
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:15,360
Speaker 1: podcast or something. Can you give me some context so

863
00:45:15,440 --> 00:45:18,880
Speaker 1: I make sure that I'm remembering the right podcast or

864
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:23,560
Speaker 1: article that I read. Yeah, so it's social media for

865
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:27,640
Speaker 1: adult content. You can go as far as you want

866
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:30,799
Speaker 1: with what you post. There's like full on porn and

867
00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:35,600
Speaker 1: then there's soft porn. You can do just photos, live interacting.

868
00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:40,279
Speaker 1: There's like a tipping situation, but it's a platform to

869
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 1: make money. Okay, I got it. I know what we're

870
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:46,520
Speaker 1: talking about. And then there's also like the podcast I

871
00:45:46,560 --> 00:45:49,319
Speaker 1: listened to about it was like how stressful it can

872
00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 1: be to manage all the d m s and how

873
00:45:52,360 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 1: you can like farm that out to a company who

874
00:45:55,560 --> 00:46:00,520
Speaker 1: will help you with your d m s. Yeah, okay, yes,

875
00:46:00,640 --> 00:46:04,440
Speaker 1: what happens in the d M s them like a

876
00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:07,560
Speaker 1: man or d M you and he'll want like I

877
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,960
Speaker 1: loved that pick, will you do one, you know, with

878
00:46:11,000 --> 00:46:14,520
Speaker 1: a lollipop or something like? They'll yeah, and then there's

879
00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:16,759
Speaker 1: a transaction and then you do the one that they

880
00:46:16,800 --> 00:46:19,600
Speaker 1: want and then yes, okay, I see yes, But it

881
00:46:19,640 --> 00:46:21,960
Speaker 1: can be like I mean, and you know what it's

882
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:26,200
Speaker 1: like with you can get so many with social media

883
00:46:26,239 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 1: and d ms, like it can be a lot to manage. Yes,

884
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:31,759
Speaker 1: that's right. I have them off and then sometimes I

885
00:46:31,880 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 1: check in on them, and then then I turn it

886
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:36,719
Speaker 1: back off, but okay, so and you guys want to

887
00:46:36,719 --> 00:46:40,040
Speaker 1: work together on this as a duo, and you would

888
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:45,239
Speaker 1: be on camera together. We would have our own profiles separate. Yeah,

889
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:47,759
Speaker 1: it would be you know, each other's cheerleaders, and we

890
00:46:47,800 --> 00:46:51,080
Speaker 1: would you know, show each other do the photo shoots together,

891
00:46:52,239 --> 00:46:56,360
Speaker 1: but not interactive. But we would be starting our own

892
00:46:57,239 --> 00:47:00,640
Speaker 1: management business, so we wouldn't have to recent because you

893
00:47:01,600 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 1: only fans already. So the idea would be to have

894
00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:09,160
Speaker 1: someone do the photography and manage. And it happened to

895
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:13,040
Speaker 1: be someone that I'm newly dating, So that's your only

896
00:47:13,120 --> 00:47:18,360
Speaker 1: hesitation here. Really, it sounds like is using this person

897
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:21,359
Speaker 1: who you're dating to manage both of you because there's

898
00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:24,759
Speaker 1: a couple of hesitations. Oh what else? What else you got?

899
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:27,600
Speaker 1: I'm going to be a nurse practitioner, so being in

900
00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:31,840
Speaker 1: the medical field, have to like really be careful about

901
00:47:31,960 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 1: maintaining anonymity and also is it worth it to have

902
00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:40,439
Speaker 1: this out there and potentially be exposed like deep into

903
00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:43,560
Speaker 1: my career as a nurse pectitioner. I'm I'm only a nurse,

904
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 1: you know, like whatever, I know you're and she yeah,

905
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:55,080
Speaker 1: yeah that and just yeah, having someone in dating photographing

906
00:47:55,120 --> 00:48:00,680
Speaker 1: my friend while I'm there, and also I not quite

907
00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:05,200
Speaker 1: sure about the relationship at the moment. It's very new.

908
00:48:05,840 --> 00:48:08,719
Speaker 1: Oh well, that's a big one. That's a big one

909
00:48:09,160 --> 00:48:11,439
Speaker 1: because if you're if this is you're dating someone who's

910
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:14,400
Speaker 1: going to manage you guys professionally, but you're not sure

911
00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:17,239
Speaker 1: of the longevity of that relationship in the dynamic and

912
00:48:17,280 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 1: how it might change. And then they're a business partner.

913
00:48:19,440 --> 00:48:23,160
Speaker 1: That's the biggest flag here for me, right, My biggest

914
00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,480
Speaker 1: flag is I don't know if this is going to

915
00:48:25,600 --> 00:48:30,000
Speaker 1: be as lucrative as you need it to be unless

916
00:48:30,120 --> 00:48:32,840
Speaker 1: you can like make it your full time thing. Because

917
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:37,520
Speaker 1: the podcast I listened to, but what my one source

918
00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:41,960
Speaker 1: of information made it sound like what seems like a

919
00:48:42,040 --> 00:48:45,520
Speaker 1: side hustle becomes your full time job if you want

920
00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:48,520
Speaker 1: it to be really lucrative. Have you examined the real

921
00:48:48,760 --> 00:48:56,120
Speaker 1: financials here? Yes, we've you found. Yeah, Like we both work,

922
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:58,600
Speaker 1: I mean already forty five hours a week, so we're

923
00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:02,520
Speaker 1: not looking for something to add on, you know, something tremendously,

924
00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:05,680
Speaker 1: but we're also looking for a way to make some

925
00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:08,160
Speaker 1: extra money to get us at a debt that will

926
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:10,640
Speaker 1: be kind of fun and enjoyable in a weird way

927
00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:13,280
Speaker 1: back that they're driving for Uber. But I would prefer

928
00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:15,120
Speaker 1: to just have fun with my best friend and take

929
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:19,520
Speaker 1: some classy photos and if we make some money off it, great,

930
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 1: But I think realistically what it would come down to

931
00:49:22,680 --> 00:49:26,640
Speaker 1: as an additional you know, fifteen twenty hours a week

932
00:49:26,680 --> 00:49:31,160
Speaker 1: of messaging, that's kind of what we think. We also

933
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:33,680
Speaker 1: got to like if we do one big you know,

934
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:36,239
Speaker 1: shoot sort of say, and we set ourselves up for

935
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,440
Speaker 1: the months or the next couple of months, and we

936
00:49:38,520 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 1: can you know, put those out every day and have

937
00:49:41,440 --> 00:49:43,680
Speaker 1: it be we spend like a day doing it and

938
00:49:43,719 --> 00:49:47,320
Speaker 1: so it can automatically post every day. So like messaging

939
00:49:47,360 --> 00:49:49,680
Speaker 1: and staying consistent is a big part of it. But

940
00:49:49,719 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 1: I think if we set ourselves up for that, then

941
00:49:53,120 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 1: maybe it could say sometimes that's what I'm thinking of.

942
00:49:56,640 --> 00:50:01,279
Speaker 1: I'm thinking of sweat equity versus real money versus I

943
00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:04,080
Speaker 1: heard autoimmune disorder. I know stress can be a big

944
00:50:04,160 --> 00:50:07,600
Speaker 1: trigger for that, and so those are all the things

945
00:50:07,680 --> 00:50:11,719
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, just as like I'm putting my entrepreneurial cap on.

946
00:50:11,880 --> 00:50:14,600
Speaker 1: This is my business partner. She loves a list. She's

947
00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 1: gonna list it out for you. Chase where are you

948
00:50:18,160 --> 00:50:21,160
Speaker 1: on this? We totally took this one over. I'm sorry.

949
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:24,680
Speaker 1: I love it using the guy that you're dating. What

950
00:50:24,880 --> 00:50:27,200
Speaker 1: is that there's some sort of financial upside to that?

951
00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:29,800
Speaker 1: Are like, are you saving a management fee? I'm confused

952
00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:34,680
Speaker 1: about that aspect. So he is a photographer videographer already

953
00:50:34,719 --> 00:50:37,799
Speaker 1: for his job, he works for a gym that's trying

954
00:50:37,840 --> 00:50:41,400
Speaker 1: to create a lifestyle brand. He's very good and he

955
00:50:42,280 --> 00:50:44,280
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know if we're getting a discount

956
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:47,319
Speaker 1: any He's not charging us up front. He is going

957
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:49,400
Speaker 1: to get a cut, and he was going to figure

958
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:54,080
Speaker 1: out the ins and outs of automatic posting, timing, managing

959
00:50:54,080 --> 00:50:57,319
Speaker 1: our Twitter account so that we can keep you know,

960
00:50:57,560 --> 00:51:02,600
Speaker 1: the advertising flowing to make it a lucrative business. But

961
00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:04,480
Speaker 1: I'm kind of at the point where I'm like, if

962
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:08,200
Speaker 1: if that relationship isn't going to continue, which I'm not

963
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:11,920
Speaker 1: sure of yet, what does that look like if do

964
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:13,879
Speaker 1: we hire him for the first shoot and pay him

965
00:51:13,960 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 1: up front and have a contract that says this is

966
00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:19,520
Speaker 1: all you're doing and we just use his photos, or

967
00:51:19,560 --> 00:51:22,360
Speaker 1: do we like let him kind of dive into the

968
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:25,919
Speaker 1: whole process and like actually take a percentage of our income. Yeah,

969
00:51:25,960 --> 00:51:29,000
Speaker 1: I think contractually, Like you really have to have everything

970
00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:31,480
Speaker 1: in black and white, because you cannot be in business

971
00:51:31,480 --> 00:51:33,640
Speaker 1: with somebody that you just started dating. Like that is

972
00:51:33,680 --> 00:51:36,960
Speaker 1: not a good idea. You have no idea what kind

973
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:39,480
Speaker 1: of person. You know, you don't know what happens in

974
00:51:39,560 --> 00:51:43,120
Speaker 1: relationships people, you know what I mean. It's just that's bad,

975
00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:46,120
Speaker 1: bad idea. I understand he comes with some advantages, but

976
00:51:46,200 --> 00:51:50,080
Speaker 1: like the legal paperwork that would be required to make

977
00:51:50,120 --> 00:51:52,640
Speaker 1: this sustainable is going to cost you more money than

978
00:51:52,680 --> 00:51:54,719
Speaker 1: you might make in the first few months of doing

979
00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 1: only fans, you know what I mean, Like, you really

980
00:51:57,080 --> 00:51:58,799
Speaker 1: need to have it in black and white, like if

981
00:51:58,800 --> 00:52:01,359
Speaker 1: you stop dating or you know, like how does it work?

982
00:52:01,400 --> 00:52:03,800
Speaker 1: Does it work? By Like, Yeah, I love the idea

983
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:05,560
Speaker 1: of doing a shoot day, and that's what you do

984
00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:07,400
Speaker 1: for the you know, and you sprinkle it out through

985
00:52:07,440 --> 00:52:09,319
Speaker 1: the rest of the month. Of course, that's the most

986
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:11,040
Speaker 1: time efficient way to do it. That's how I do

987
00:52:11,120 --> 00:52:13,320
Speaker 1: social media, you know, that's what a lot of people

988
00:52:13,320 --> 00:52:16,120
Speaker 1: do for many things. But getting into business with some

989
00:52:16,160 --> 00:52:18,480
Speaker 1: guy that you're dating just as not a kosher idea.

990
00:52:18,680 --> 00:52:21,160
Speaker 1: So you have to figure out a way around that

991
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:23,879
Speaker 1: unless you have somebody like a lawyer that's in your

992
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 1: family or a friend of yours that's going to drop

993
00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:28,960
Speaker 1: this paperwork for you. That will make it very clear

994
00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:32,160
Speaker 1: the split that they get, and you have to have

995
00:52:32,239 --> 00:52:35,759
Speaker 1: like a very big boundary conversation about what happens if

996
00:52:35,800 --> 00:52:40,120
Speaker 1: you guys don't continue dating. It's just that's that part

997
00:52:40,239 --> 00:52:44,839
Speaker 1: is pretty that sounds messy. Yeah, he is a very

998
00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:49,040
Speaker 1: level headed person and a lovely person. He grew up

999
00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:53,000
Speaker 1: with two sisters and just his mom, so like he's

1000
00:52:53,360 --> 00:52:57,160
Speaker 1: very intuned to women and I do trust him. Yeah,

1001
00:52:57,160 --> 00:53:00,680
Speaker 1: but everyone's level everyone's levelheaded and getting until they're not.

1002
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:04,680
Speaker 1: So just don't you can't trust that until you know

1003
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:08,080
Speaker 1: somebody for a long period of time, what's gonna happen? Yeah,

1004
00:53:08,520 --> 00:53:11,760
Speaker 1: I mean just kind of looking at the low hanging fruit.

1005
00:53:12,120 --> 00:53:16,640
Speaker 1: If anonymity is really important to you, maybe there's a

1006
00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:19,719
Speaker 1: business opportunity here that doesn't have you on camera at all.

1007
00:53:20,160 --> 00:53:25,120
Speaker 1: Like it's not necessarily as sexy quite literally, But you know,

1008
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,959
Speaker 1: you've talked about the things that people hate about doing

1009
00:53:28,040 --> 00:53:31,560
Speaker 1: only fans. It's the paperwork, it's the d m NG,

1010
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:34,399
Speaker 1: it's the all this stuff that's just like hours from

1011
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 1: their day. Maybe there's a business opportunity for you to

1012
00:53:38,400 --> 00:53:43,040
Speaker 1: be the business behind only fans creators who are already successful,

1013
00:53:43,960 --> 00:53:46,879
Speaker 1: providing these sorts of resources for them, so like they

1014
00:53:46,880 --> 00:53:50,200
Speaker 1: can offload that stuff to you. Maybe it's for a cut.

1015
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:52,239
Speaker 1: I mean, from what you read, a lot of a

1016
00:53:52,280 --> 00:53:54,239
Speaker 1: lot of people on there are making gobs of money,

1017
00:53:54,280 --> 00:53:56,480
Speaker 1: so they're not going to care what it costs just

1018
00:53:56,480 --> 00:53:59,120
Speaker 1: to be able to offload all the business side. And

1019
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:01,360
Speaker 1: as you've said, you've business minds, you know how to

1020
00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:06,120
Speaker 1: create a business plan and you know, basically be consultants. Yeah, yeah,

1021
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 1: that is funny. And then I I recently at the

1022
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:11,480
Speaker 1: month who I really like, and I'm already thinking like

1023
00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:14,160
Speaker 1: I'm going to tell him I'm going to do only fans.

1024
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:16,319
Speaker 1: Like I'm kind of embarrassed, and I'm like, maybe that's

1025
00:54:16,360 --> 00:54:22,719
Speaker 1: internally something saying more than what I'm really reflecting on. Perhaps,

1026
00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:25,839
Speaker 1: But well, I would definitely listen to all of that,

1027
00:54:25,960 --> 00:54:29,000
Speaker 1: you know, because that's that's what you're feeling inside, if

1028
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:31,759
Speaker 1: you're worried about that. But I think there might be

1029
00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:34,879
Speaker 1: a business opportunity here. But more like what Catherine's saying, right,

1030
00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:39,960
Speaker 1: maybe you can start a snage management company for Yeah,

1031
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:42,879
Speaker 1: that's a great idea, Catherine. Actually I think you should, yeah,

1032
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:45,480
Speaker 1: look into that. And then how would they go about that,

1033
00:54:45,640 --> 00:54:50,799
Speaker 1: contacting people who are on only fans and like contact Yeah,

1034
00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:53,200
Speaker 1: because I'm sure that I'm sure those people who was

1035
00:54:53,239 --> 00:54:55,799
Speaker 1: It's Black China or something made ten million dollars a

1036
00:54:55,800 --> 00:54:58,759
Speaker 1: month last year on only fans or something month a month.

1037
00:54:59,560 --> 00:55:04,680
Speaker 1: Money for successful and and your your average gal like

1038
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:09,000
Speaker 1: non famous person. There's been girls that make up to

1039
00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:13,960
Speaker 1: twelve fift thousand a month. Everything that I've read, that's

1040
00:55:13,960 --> 00:55:19,960
Speaker 1: extremes and that's that's hard work, consistent posting. Yeah, I

1041
00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:22,800
Speaker 1: just want to pay off my student loans. You're looking

1042
00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 1: to like a side scratch, right, like a little side hustle.

1043
00:55:26,200 --> 00:55:27,759
Speaker 1: This sounds like if you really want to make a

1044
00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:30,080
Speaker 1: lot of money, it's a full job, is what it's

1045
00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:33,279
Speaker 1: sounding like. Yeah, And I just want to point out

1046
00:55:33,280 --> 00:55:38,240
Speaker 1: your tattoo. If you're looking about remaining anonymous, we talked

1047
00:55:38,239 --> 00:55:42,600
Speaker 1: about that, covering them up. Oh, I see, okay, And

1048
00:55:42,600 --> 00:55:45,320
Speaker 1: then I mean I think, yeah, I don't think anyone

1049
00:55:45,320 --> 00:55:47,359
Speaker 1: gives a ship anymore. Like if a nurse is getting

1050
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:49,680
Speaker 1: nude on the side, who cares? You know what I mean? Like,

1051
00:55:49,719 --> 00:55:53,120
Speaker 1: what is that shouldn't matter. Yeah, it's not like you're

1052
00:55:53,160 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 1: a congresswoman. I mean, look what they get away with.

1053
00:55:56,120 --> 00:55:59,960
Speaker 1: I know, I know, I guess nurses should get public

1054
00:56:00,080 --> 00:56:08,560
Speaker 1: this too. We can manage that only fans for medical professionals.

1055
00:56:09,960 --> 00:56:15,799
Speaker 1: That could be your stick, that could be your you know.

1056
00:56:15,880 --> 00:56:19,279
Speaker 1: You guys can always also like experiment. Whenever I have,

1057
00:56:19,440 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 1: like a new idea or a new business idea, they

1058
00:56:22,680 --> 00:56:27,000
Speaker 1: don't always all bloom into something amazing. You've mentioned a

1059
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:29,359
Speaker 1: few things that you're a little nervous about, Like you

1060
00:56:29,400 --> 00:56:33,399
Speaker 1: could try doing a shoot, and maybe after doing one

1061
00:56:33,560 --> 00:56:37,760
Speaker 1: photo shoot, you're like, what it turns out that was weird.

1062
00:56:37,840 --> 00:56:40,400
Speaker 1: It was super weird that my boyfriend was seeing your nudy.

1063
00:56:40,960 --> 00:56:44,360
Speaker 1: And we're gonna now forget that happened and we're just

1064
00:56:44,440 --> 00:56:47,680
Speaker 1: gonna come up with a new idea. And that's okay

1065
00:56:47,760 --> 00:56:51,040
Speaker 1: to Yeah, I do like a test shoot. See if

1066
00:56:51,040 --> 00:56:53,440
Speaker 1: the photos even turn out. If you loved it and

1067
00:56:53,480 --> 00:56:55,920
Speaker 1: the photos turn out great, you have them, you know,

1068
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:58,480
Speaker 1: But just because you do it one time doesn't mean

1069
00:56:58,520 --> 00:57:01,160
Speaker 1: it has to be a thing you're doing or we Actually,

1070
00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:04,760
Speaker 1: you can keep checking in with yourself, you know, keep

1071
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:07,880
Speaker 1: asking yourself, is this still right for me? Does this

1072
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:10,160
Speaker 1: still feel like a thing I want to do? Do

1073
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:14,680
Speaker 1: I have time for this? Is this a match? Yeah?

1074
00:57:14,800 --> 00:57:16,960
Speaker 1: And there's also other people who know how to take

1075
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:21,760
Speaker 1: pictures who aren't your boyfriend. H Yeah. Yeah, I have

1076
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:24,920
Speaker 1: a little bit of photography experience, so I could at

1077
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:27,240
Speaker 1: least get like the lighting and everything. So that's what

1078
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:30,360
Speaker 1: we're saying, like we could do this, But I think

1079
00:57:30,440 --> 00:57:32,960
Speaker 1: what we were trying to offload was the hours of

1080
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:36,080
Speaker 1: work of editing photos and posting because we do work

1081
00:57:36,120 --> 00:57:39,600
Speaker 1: full time. So and with somebody who you like, you're

1082
00:57:39,720 --> 00:57:43,080
Speaker 1: you're kind of trusting because you have a personal connection

1083
00:57:43,120 --> 00:57:47,040
Speaker 1: relationship with Yeah, yeah, right. I think either way, whether

1084
00:57:47,080 --> 00:57:49,480
Speaker 1: you decide to like do a shoot or get into

1085
00:57:49,480 --> 00:57:52,120
Speaker 1: this full time, or maybe do some business or social

1086
00:57:52,120 --> 00:57:55,720
Speaker 1: media management, talk to a few people who are doing this,

1087
00:57:56,000 --> 00:57:58,400
Speaker 1: find out what the pain points are, what do they

1088
00:57:58,400 --> 00:58:00,480
Speaker 1: love about it, what do they hate to about it?

1089
00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:03,400
Speaker 1: And actually like rather than you know, just reading articles,

1090
00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:05,680
Speaker 1: talk to somebody who's really doing it. You know, you

1091
00:58:05,920 --> 00:58:09,040
Speaker 1: maybe even pay them for their time through only fans

1092
00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:11,040
Speaker 1: as what they hate about it. End those pain points.

1093
00:58:11,400 --> 00:58:13,920
Speaker 1: That's what is going to show you where the business

1094
00:58:13,960 --> 00:58:18,280
Speaker 1: model is. I actually do know someone, Yeah, pretty closely,

1095
00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 1: that does it? Yeah? Yeah, perfect a female. Yeah, so

1096
00:58:21,800 --> 00:58:25,800
Speaker 1: I could message her, Yeah, do some research, some information gathering,

1097
00:58:25,880 --> 00:58:28,000
Speaker 1: and let that inform you to see if you want

1098
00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:31,920
Speaker 1: to really take the next step. Yeah, yeah, that's great advice.

1099
00:58:32,000 --> 00:58:34,520
Speaker 1: But I love that you girls called into the podcast

1100
00:58:34,560 --> 00:58:40,840
Speaker 1: to see if you should go on only fans. That's

1101
00:58:36,520 --> 00:58:43,680
Speaker 1: a or like Chelsea will tell us like it is,

1102
00:58:45,360 --> 00:58:50,240
Speaker 1: and thank you for calling in with champagne. Ladies. We're

1103
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:53,320
Speaker 1: going to have a day. April lives in Napa, so

1104
00:58:53,360 --> 00:58:58,000
Speaker 1: we're gonna go and have a day in Napa. Nice lovely.

1105
00:58:58,800 --> 00:59:03,520
Speaker 1: Make sure to get some picture scarls. Yeah, we'll be

1106
00:59:03,560 --> 00:59:08,040
Speaker 1: practicing after our wine tours. Perfect. Well, thanks, let us

1107
00:59:08,040 --> 00:59:16,320
Speaker 1: know what happens. We'll do by that's really real over here. Yeah, seriously,

1108
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:18,520
Speaker 1: I can't believe that's our first callers that called with

1109
00:59:18,680 --> 00:59:23,920
Speaker 1: drinks in their hand. Actually, that's actually good. Yeah. Well,

1110
00:59:24,000 --> 00:59:26,320
Speaker 1: let's take a quick break and we'll be back to

1111
00:59:26,360 --> 00:59:33,760
Speaker 1: wrap up with Angela and Jenna and we're back. Hi.

1112
00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:37,720
Speaker 1: Oh guys, what a delight that was today. Angela and Jenna.

1113
00:59:38,120 --> 00:59:40,800
Speaker 1: It was so nice having you both together and on

1114
00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:43,840
Speaker 1: on our show. Thank you, Thank you. So much for

1115
00:59:43,880 --> 00:59:45,959
Speaker 1: having us. I'm now going to be your best friend,

1116
00:59:46,080 --> 00:59:48,560
Speaker 1: your other bust friend. I'm gonna be texting you where

1117
00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:52,680
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be emailing perfect. I love texting, I love emailing.

1118
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:56,240
Speaker 1: I love all of it. Amazing. Well, do either of

1119
00:59:56,280 --> 00:59:58,840
Speaker 1: you have any advice questions you'd like to ask? Chelsea?

1120
00:59:59,280 --> 01:00:05,520
Speaker 1: I have one. You go first, Okay, Chelsea. Ski season

1121
01:00:05,600 --> 01:00:09,760
Speaker 1: is upon us. I am a new person to skiing

1122
01:00:09,840 --> 01:00:12,680
Speaker 1: and I love it. My family learned how to ski

1123
01:00:12,800 --> 01:00:16,880
Speaker 1: during the pandemic. We relocated to Santa Fe to be

1124
01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:20,480
Speaker 1: with family. We were locked down together and I don't

1125
01:00:20,480 --> 01:00:22,760
Speaker 1: know if you've skied in Santa Fe, but the ski

1126
01:00:22,800 --> 01:00:25,360
Speaker 1: mountain is about twenty minutes away from town, so we

1127
01:00:25,400 --> 01:00:28,920
Speaker 1: could go daily every other day. It was the best

1128
01:00:28,960 --> 01:00:30,760
Speaker 1: way to learn how to ski. So I learned to

1129
01:00:30,800 --> 01:00:33,960
Speaker 1: ski at forty seven years old and I love it.

1130
01:00:34,320 --> 01:00:37,400
Speaker 1: My kids love it, my husband loves it. I am

1131
01:00:37,480 --> 01:00:42,120
Speaker 1: here for any skiing advice. Is there any kind of

1132
01:00:42,320 --> 01:00:46,360
Speaker 1: ski accessory that you cannot live without? So? Which mountain

1133
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:50,440
Speaker 1: were you skiing? Not tos No, that's a little too

1134
01:00:50,440 --> 01:00:52,760
Speaker 1: hard for me. We were skiing at Ski Santa Fe.

1135
01:00:53,160 --> 01:00:56,120
Speaker 1: Santa Fe has its own ski Mountain Ski Santa Fe.

1136
01:00:56,160 --> 01:00:57,960
Speaker 1: That's where I learned how to ski. Now I've sent

1137
01:00:58,080 --> 01:01:04,520
Speaker 1: skied other places, but I'm I'm Green's and easy groomed blues.

1138
01:01:05,120 --> 01:01:09,040
Speaker 1: That's my That's where I'm at. My family is all advanced.

1139
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:12,880
Speaker 1: Even my children are skiing blacks. Okay, I see, I see,

1140
01:01:12,920 --> 01:01:14,800
Speaker 1: I see. Well I love that. First of all, how

1141
01:01:14,800 --> 01:01:16,880
Speaker 1: great is it to pick up something when you're forty seven.

1142
01:01:16,880 --> 01:01:20,760
Speaker 1: I'm forty seven too, and I love when people talk

1143
01:01:20,800 --> 01:01:22,880
Speaker 1: about a new sport that they learned, because some people

1144
01:01:22,960 --> 01:01:24,720
Speaker 1: just think it's too late for things, you know, and

1145
01:01:24,800 --> 01:01:27,640
Speaker 1: that's never true. So that's so exciting. First of all,

1146
01:01:27,680 --> 01:01:31,480
Speaker 1: there's a great, great woman named Taras Shackty on Instagram

1147
01:01:31,680 --> 01:01:36,400
Speaker 1: who makes these adorable ski suits. So, I mean they're pretty.

1148
01:01:36,520 --> 01:01:38,480
Speaker 1: You kind of get noticed when you're wearing them, but

1149
01:01:38,520 --> 01:01:40,640
Speaker 1: they're fun to wear. Every once in a while, she

1150
01:01:40,800 --> 01:01:45,040
Speaker 1: just DM me with her new winter styles or colors. Well,

1151
01:01:45,080 --> 01:01:47,320
Speaker 1: I'm definitely here for that. I got my ski pants

1152
01:01:47,320 --> 01:01:51,080
Speaker 1: off Amazon, so I'm in. I'm in the market for

1153
01:01:51,200 --> 01:01:54,520
Speaker 1: maybe an upgrade this year. So her Instagram is t

1154
01:01:54,680 --> 01:01:57,960
Speaker 1: A R A s h a k t I and

1155
01:01:58,000 --> 01:02:00,360
Speaker 1: she has the cutest snowsuits other than that, do you

1156
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:04,280
Speaker 1: have your heated gloves and heated boots? No, No, I

1157
01:02:04,400 --> 01:02:09,360
Speaker 1: just shove the little handwarmers and toewarmers in. But I've

1158
01:02:09,400 --> 01:02:13,160
Speaker 1: been wondering, I've been skeptical. Is this really a cool

1159
01:02:13,200 --> 01:02:16,040
Speaker 1: thing to have the heated ones? Yeah, you should get mits.

1160
01:02:16,280 --> 01:02:18,920
Speaker 1: Mits keep your hands warmer than the gloves than putting

1161
01:02:18,960 --> 01:02:22,000
Speaker 1: your five your fingers get warmer. So I have a MIT,

1162
01:02:22,040 --> 01:02:24,600
Speaker 1: but I just put like a you know, a handwarmer

1163
01:02:24,640 --> 01:02:27,040
Speaker 1: in the in the top. Yeah. I would get heated

1164
01:02:27,080 --> 01:02:29,800
Speaker 1: gloves and heated boots. And it is a game changer.

1165
01:02:30,200 --> 01:02:32,200
Speaker 1: So then you like because it just as long as

1166
01:02:32,240 --> 01:02:35,000
Speaker 1: you are comfortable when it does get really cold, that

1167
01:02:35,080 --> 01:02:37,919
Speaker 1: will change everything. And it's so nice because if it's

1168
01:02:37,960 --> 01:02:39,920
Speaker 1: not cold enough, you can just turn it off and

1169
01:02:39,960 --> 01:02:41,760
Speaker 1: you don't need it. But it's such a nice luxury

1170
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 1: to have. And I'm so surprised by so many people

1171
01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:46,040
Speaker 1: on the mountain who are like, do those really work?

1172
01:02:46,120 --> 01:02:48,280
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, they work. I mean I ski in

1173
01:02:48,320 --> 01:02:51,680
Speaker 1: Whistler work it gets really frigid, so you need warmth

1174
01:02:51,720 --> 01:02:54,000
Speaker 1: and stuff. But I think that really, like, you know, comfort,

1175
01:02:54,000 --> 01:02:56,760
Speaker 1: when you can be comfortable while you're skiing, it's the best.

1176
01:02:57,120 --> 01:03:00,480
Speaker 1: And then I would just say for a technique and stuff.

1177
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:03,200
Speaker 1: I always someone once just told me, you know when

1178
01:03:03,240 --> 01:03:05,479
Speaker 1: you're pole planting and learning how to poll plant, because

1179
01:03:05,480 --> 01:03:06,720
Speaker 1: for a long time I didn't know what to do

1180
01:03:06,760 --> 01:03:08,640
Speaker 1: with my poles. I was just like, no, I don't

1181
01:03:08,680 --> 01:03:11,320
Speaker 1: even need them. But when you're pole planting, it's nice

1182
01:03:11,360 --> 01:03:13,800
Speaker 1: to think of taking your poll as like getting you

1183
01:03:13,880 --> 01:03:16,320
Speaker 1: down the mountain. You know, every time you plant, you're

1184
01:03:16,360 --> 01:03:19,640
Speaker 1: turning down the mountain, and that way you're in control

1185
01:03:19,680 --> 01:03:21,760
Speaker 1: of the mountain. The mountain is not in control of you.

1186
01:03:22,640 --> 01:03:26,360
Speaker 1: All right, I'm so excited. It's like it's coming up

1187
01:03:26,560 --> 01:03:29,440
Speaker 1: and I didn't love my boots last year, or so

1188
01:03:29,480 --> 01:03:31,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna try to upgrade my boots. Yeah, you should

1189
01:03:31,920 --> 01:03:34,960
Speaker 1: try and get customized boots because when then they mold

1190
01:03:35,000 --> 01:03:37,680
Speaker 1: them to your feet and then that way you're just

1191
01:03:37,760 --> 01:03:39,800
Speaker 1: because boots are so tricky, like if I have to

1192
01:03:39,800 --> 01:03:41,680
Speaker 1: wear my if I have to wear any other boots

1193
01:03:41,680 --> 01:03:44,040
Speaker 1: than my own, like when you're trekking up a mountain,

1194
01:03:44,080 --> 01:03:46,680
Speaker 1: you you have to get different boats. I can't even believe.

1195
01:03:46,720 --> 01:03:50,680
Speaker 1: I can't think of this term. What the touring? Sorry, yeah,

1196
01:03:50,720 --> 01:03:53,040
Speaker 1: I see people doing that. I don't like that. I

1197
01:03:53,160 --> 01:03:55,040
Speaker 1: like to ride up a chairlift and then go down

1198
01:03:55,080 --> 01:03:57,760
Speaker 1: the mountain. I don't want any exercise. Yeah, when you

1199
01:03:57,800 --> 01:04:00,080
Speaker 1: have your own customized boots where you get molded it

1200
01:04:00,160 --> 01:04:02,440
Speaker 1: for them, that makes the hugest difference too, because then

1201
01:04:02,440 --> 01:04:05,040
Speaker 1: your feet and are like locked in and your ankles

1202
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:07,640
Speaker 1: are locked in, and the feeling of security is just

1203
01:04:07,680 --> 01:04:10,800
Speaker 1: so much better. Okay, see, I think you know I

1204
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:13,360
Speaker 1: I kind of wanted to make sure before I spent

1205
01:04:13,440 --> 01:04:15,640
Speaker 1: all that money, and I like really committed. I'm like,

1206
01:04:15,680 --> 01:04:18,680
Speaker 1: am I committed to this sport? But as Angela knows

1207
01:04:19,040 --> 01:04:22,000
Speaker 1: I am. Now we are in. We you are so in.

1208
01:04:22,280 --> 01:04:25,760
Speaker 1: I mean we are. We watch when it's snowing and

1209
01:04:25,920 --> 01:04:29,480
Speaker 1: we go follow the snow. We've become obsessed. So just

1210
01:04:29,520 --> 01:04:32,240
Speaker 1: set yourself up for success. It's okay. The investment is

1211
01:04:32,240 --> 01:04:35,560
Speaker 1: worth it always. Yeah, yeah, thank you. I love a

1212
01:04:35,600 --> 01:04:40,560
Speaker 1: ski question. Okay, I have a question, Okay, dare Chelsey. So,

1213
01:04:41,560 --> 01:04:44,200
Speaker 1: I had a hard time during the pandemic because I

1214
01:04:44,640 --> 01:04:47,120
Speaker 1: love to have people over and hang and that was

1215
01:04:47,160 --> 01:04:51,919
Speaker 1: a real hard thing for me, just missing having people over.

1216
01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:54,919
Speaker 1: So one of the things I used to do every

1217
01:04:55,000 --> 01:04:59,120
Speaker 1: year was I had a Yankee swap Christmas party something

1218
01:04:59,120 --> 01:05:01,480
Speaker 1: that started on the show The Office, if you watch it,

1219
01:05:02,000 --> 01:05:04,920
Speaker 1: we had this whole Christmas exchange and I decided, it's

1220
01:05:04,960 --> 01:05:06,880
Speaker 1: like the classy what was it, Jenna's like the white

1221
01:05:06,880 --> 01:05:10,200
Speaker 1: elephin gift, right, So I started having that party here

1222
01:05:10,200 --> 01:05:13,080
Speaker 1: at my house and it got so rowdy and so

1223
01:05:13,160 --> 01:05:17,400
Speaker 1: fun and people go crazy. They Jenna's gift is always

1224
01:05:17,400 --> 01:05:19,640
Speaker 1: a big hit. You've brought the water hose one year

1225
01:05:19,680 --> 01:05:22,600
Speaker 1: and Oscar Nunia started chan and give them the hose

1226
01:05:22,800 --> 01:05:26,240
Speaker 1: like it's like the trade start happening and people have

1227
01:05:26,280 --> 01:05:29,160
Speaker 1: a really good time. And I really want to bring

1228
01:05:29,200 --> 01:05:31,520
Speaker 1: my Christmas party back this year. And I get this

1229
01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:35,120
Speaker 1: taco guy and he's amazing. He has this whole setup.

1230
01:05:35,640 --> 01:05:39,000
Speaker 1: But I've never hired anyone to do drinks. Everybody just

1231
01:05:39,080 --> 01:05:41,360
Speaker 1: makes their own drinks. But I really wanted to make

1232
01:05:41,400 --> 01:05:43,960
Speaker 1: a margharita, like a great margharita and have a picture

1233
01:05:43,960 --> 01:05:46,640
Speaker 1: of margarita's out, and I just feel like, you know

1234
01:05:46,720 --> 01:05:49,560
Speaker 1: how to make a good margharita, And I would love

1235
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:54,120
Speaker 1: your MARGARITEA recipe. Oh it's pretty basic. I mean I

1236
01:05:54,160 --> 01:05:56,080
Speaker 1: don't like them too sweet? Do you like them? So

1237
01:05:56,160 --> 01:05:58,480
Speaker 1: I don't either I don't like sweet. That's my thing.

1238
01:05:58,600 --> 01:06:00,560
Speaker 1: And I feel like I feel like I have a

1239
01:06:00,640 --> 01:06:04,000
Speaker 1: memory of you somewhere on a deck talking about a margarita,

1240
01:06:04,080 --> 01:06:06,040
Speaker 1: and I was like, I want to ask her. I

1241
01:06:06,080 --> 01:06:08,040
Speaker 1: know there's a lot of big life questions I could

1242
01:06:08,040 --> 01:06:10,600
Speaker 1: ask you, but I really want your margarita. I like

1243
01:06:10,760 --> 01:06:13,840
Speaker 1: Don Julio Blanco. For me, I like the silver tequila.

1244
01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:17,160
Speaker 1: I don't like smoky tequila. I like silver tequila, so

1245
01:06:17,240 --> 01:06:19,760
Speaker 1: Don Julio Blanco is my favorite. I use tons of

1246
01:06:19,800 --> 01:06:22,160
Speaker 1: fresh lives. They have to be fresh, squeeze lives. You

1247
01:06:22,160 --> 01:06:25,360
Speaker 1: have to do that, like massive amounts. And I'm writing

1248
01:06:25,400 --> 01:06:27,880
Speaker 1: this down and the way to avoid the sweetness is

1249
01:06:27,920 --> 01:06:30,320
Speaker 1: to get you know, quantros. What makes it sweet? So

1250
01:06:30,440 --> 01:06:32,440
Speaker 1: instead of quanto because a lot of people like a

1251
01:06:32,440 --> 01:06:34,720
Speaker 1: little bit of sweet, I just personally don't like that.

1252
01:06:35,080 --> 01:06:38,439
Speaker 1: But what's better than quantro is just a nice gave

1253
01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:40,840
Speaker 1: that you put a tiny bit of a gove in.

1254
01:06:41,200 --> 01:06:43,400
Speaker 1: And there's tons of different brands of organic a gave

1255
01:06:43,600 --> 01:06:47,120
Speaker 1: that you can use. But Margarita's season is not upon

1256
01:06:47,280 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 1: us yet. I haven't had margarita as yet. When this

1257
01:06:49,920 --> 01:06:54,320
Speaker 1: Margarita season, I guess now, Oh yeah, I drink when

1258
01:06:54,320 --> 01:06:57,040
Speaker 1: I ski, I have Margarita's. That's what I drink, Margarita's.

1259
01:06:57,880 --> 01:07:00,280
Speaker 1: I was in Spain, so they don't make margaart ITA's

1260
01:07:00,280 --> 01:07:02,400
Speaker 1: in Spain, and anytime you try to order one, it's

1261
01:07:02,480 --> 01:07:05,240
Speaker 1: terrible because people don't realize Spain is not Mexico. It's

1262
01:07:05,280 --> 01:07:09,080
Speaker 1: a totally different scenario. But yeah, agave instead of quanto,

1263
01:07:09,320 --> 01:07:11,400
Speaker 1: and then that cuts the sweet in half, and just

1264
01:07:11,480 --> 01:07:15,040
Speaker 1: use fresh lime and never use a mix ever. Okay,

1265
01:07:15,120 --> 01:07:17,840
Speaker 1: And and then the silver tequila is key. Yeah, Okay,

1266
01:07:18,320 --> 01:07:21,200
Speaker 1: I wrote it down. I'm very excited. I'm gonna make one.

1267
01:07:21,200 --> 01:07:23,040
Speaker 1: I'll let you know about it. Okay. Great, that's the

1268
01:07:23,080 --> 01:07:25,200
Speaker 1: only rule of recipe I know. So I'm glad that's

1269
01:07:25,200 --> 01:07:29,959
Speaker 1: the one, the one you asked for. Amazing. Well, thank

1270
01:07:30,000 --> 01:07:32,200
Speaker 1: you so much for joining us. This is so fun.

1271
01:07:32,880 --> 01:07:35,800
Speaker 1: I loved it. Thank you guys so much. I just

1272
01:07:35,840 --> 01:07:39,040
Speaker 1: love your podcast so much. Can I come back next week?

1273
01:07:39,120 --> 01:07:41,720
Speaker 1: And I come back anytime? You girls? Thank you a

1274
01:07:41,840 --> 01:07:44,480
Speaker 1: great gig. Oh yeah, I know we do. It's so

1275
01:07:44,600 --> 01:07:47,560
Speaker 1: much fun and we're so delighted to have you guys.

1276
01:07:47,600 --> 01:07:50,200
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. You were both such pleasures. Thank you,

1277
01:07:50,560 --> 01:07:53,479
Speaker 1: and I hope to see you both soon. I hope

1278
01:07:53,480 --> 01:07:57,680
Speaker 1: so too. Okay, I would love it. Okay, take care

1279
01:07:57,680 --> 01:08:01,320
Speaker 1: of guys. Bye bye bye. So I am winding up

1280
01:08:01,320 --> 01:08:04,000
Speaker 1: my stand up tour. Vaccinated in Horney is coming to

1281
01:08:04,080 --> 01:08:06,120
Speaker 1: a screeching halt at the end of the year. I

1282
01:08:06,160 --> 01:08:09,880
Speaker 1: have my last dates coming up, and these are the

1283
01:08:09,960 --> 01:08:13,000
Speaker 1: last opportunities. You have to also buy merch from the

1284
01:08:13,040 --> 01:08:16,360
Speaker 1: website Chelsea Hammler dot com if you want Vaccinating Horny

1285
01:08:16,439 --> 01:08:19,960
Speaker 1: captain's hats that say We're the Captain's now for women only,

1286
01:08:20,160 --> 01:08:22,280
Speaker 1: our t shirts for men and your family that say

1287
01:08:22,320 --> 01:08:25,280
Speaker 1: I'm sorry because they should be. I only have a

1288
01:08:25,320 --> 01:08:32,280
Speaker 1: few dates left Concord, New Hampshire, Wooster, Mass wilkes Berry, Pennsylvania.

1289
01:08:33,040 --> 01:08:36,720
Speaker 1: Wilkes Berry, Pennsylvania. There I said it, and then San

1290
01:08:36,760 --> 01:08:40,680
Speaker 1: Diego and Riverside, California, and then Baltimore, Maryland, and then

1291
01:08:40,720 --> 01:08:44,560
Speaker 1: my very last date is December six in Reading, Pennsylvania.

1292
01:08:45,320 --> 01:08:47,680
Speaker 1: If you are enjoying what you're hearing, you can subscribe

1293
01:08:47,680 --> 01:08:52,040
Speaker 1: to Dear Chelsea that is our podcast, and you can

1294
01:08:52,240 --> 01:08:54,479
Speaker 1: rate us if you want. Yeah, that's a great idea.

1295
01:08:54,520 --> 01:08:57,880
Speaker 1: It actually makes a huge difference for this podcast, for

1296
01:08:57,920 --> 01:09:01,080
Speaker 1: any podcast that you like some scribing giving it a

1297
01:09:01,200 --> 01:09:03,200
Speaker 1: rating actually make a huge difference in who all it

1298
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:07,120
Speaker 1: gets served too, and helpfully spread the word Okay, yeah, yeah,

1299
01:09:07,200 --> 01:09:11,519
Speaker 1: subscribe and and and and comment yeah and follow. So

1300
01:09:11,560 --> 01:09:14,120
Speaker 1: if you'd like advice from Chelsea, just send us an

1301
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:18,760
Speaker 1: email at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com. Dear

1302
01:09:18,840 --> 01:09:22,519
Speaker 1: Chelsea is a production of I Heart Radio. Executive produced

1303
01:09:22,520 --> 01:09:25,840
Speaker 1: by Nick Stuff, produced by Catherine Law, and edited and

1304
01:09:25,920 --> 01:09:27,600
Speaker 1: engineered by Brad Dickert.