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Speaker 1: Scott.

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Speaker 2: You ready, Yeah, I'm ready to laugh and laugh and love.

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Speaker 3: Dolphins recognize friends by tasting their piss. There's a more

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Speaker 3: scientists find in wild experiment.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, we'll drinking in. This is a brand

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Speaker 2: new episode of Bananas.

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Speaker 1: Your world of its?

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Speaker 2: Would you believe.

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Speaker 4: Your mindsillion pieces?

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Speaker 2: Would you believe?

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Speaker 1: Baby ba baby?

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Speaker 2: Welcome guys, counts are not buying air founds. Welcome to

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Speaker 2: Banana man, aren't you Jersey?

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Speaker 1: It is from here, from here.

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Speaker 2: He's from here, so coming.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, this has been fantasic.

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Speaker 2: What a town?

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Speaker 1: What a town?

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Speaker 3: I played a play a little mini golf on the

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Speaker 3: boardwalk my children. I got about ten tips for that

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Speaker 3: fucking minigolf place to be one thousand percent better, okay,

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Speaker 3: with just like five dollars of investment. Right, Has anybody

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Speaker 3: played mini golf on the boardwalk in Asbury Park. It's

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Speaker 3: the shittiest minigolf no you've ever played in your whole life,

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Speaker 3: in the baking sun with not an ounce of shade

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Speaker 3: at all.

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Speaker 2: Any windmills.

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Speaker 1: Nope. Another question about a normal minigolf thing.

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Speaker 2: Any old man with a putter turning really slowly to

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Speaker 2: block you from the hall nope. Do you hit it

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Speaker 2: into a gator's mouth and it comes out the tail

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Speaker 2: and if you get it right, it almost gets a

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Speaker 2: hole in one. Nope, nope.

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Speaker 3: It is just realistic putting green at our flat and

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Speaker 3: children are just confused. But there is no there's no challenges,

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Speaker 3: there's no fun stuff. There's one thing where it like

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Speaker 3: goes through a hole. We spent the whole time just

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Speaker 3: on like it goes through a thing, and then put

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Speaker 3: pops out another one and then that's you're just like,

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Speaker 3: that's amazing.

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Speaker 1: So my children have a very low bar when I

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Speaker 1: bring them to like a real putt putt place, they're

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Speaker 1: just gonna be.

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Speaker 2: Like, what the fuck what's going on here? It's Pirates

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Speaker 2: of the carabb being here. Pretty cool? Yeah, pretty cool?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I been playing a lot of pinball. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: been have you been yet?

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Speaker 2: Yes, I've been.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's the best.

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Speaker 2: That place is pretty cool. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Hometown, my hometown kurts from here, native son.

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Speaker 2: Still takes quarters. Yeah, shocking.

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Speaker 3: That is how I talked my way in. There was

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Speaker 3: a music festival here I don't know, eight years ago.

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Speaker 3: Uh called Tomorrow's Parties. All Tomorrow's Parties.

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Speaker 2: Sounds fun.

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Speaker 3: And they had comedians performing, and I was not one

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Speaker 3: of the comedians performing. And I talked my way into

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Speaker 3: hosting the like the comedy three hours or whatever by

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Speaker 3: being like, I'm Asbury Park's native son.

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Speaker 1: You have to let me have to.

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Speaker 3: And that was how I was billed as Asbury Park's

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Speaker 3: native son. You have to in all of the things

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Speaker 3: that my friend Mike Merrill, who used to live here,

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Speaker 3: who is essentially the at the like the mayor of

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Speaker 3: Asbury give it up for Mike Merrill, and why not.

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Speaker 1: He just kept making fun of me the whole time,

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Speaker 1: just being like, oh, here comes.

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Speaker 3: Asbury's native son was here from nineteen seventy seven to

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Speaker 3: nineteen eighty.

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Speaker 2: That's right, the Glory years. It's nice here. I like it.

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Speaker 1: This is my favorite place in the world.

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Speaker 2: I looked up things that are legal in New Jersey. Yes,

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Speaker 2: because I liked some local flavor. You know, I like

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Speaker 2: to have fun. I had some boardwalk fries. Oh yeah.

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Speaker 2: Not many people realize these are things that are actually

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Speaker 2: I llegal New Jersey. This is from only in Your

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Speaker 2: State dot com written by Kristin Just Kristen. Just Kristen

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Speaker 2: didn't put a last name wasn't that proud of the writing.

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Speaker 1: But she is.

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Speaker 2: She might be the best in the biz.

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Speaker 1: Uh.

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Speaker 2: Every state is questionable. Laws on the books in New

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Speaker 2: Jersey is no different. Throughout the years, politicians have established

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Speaker 2: some pretty strange policies, many of which might have you

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Speaker 2: scratching her head.

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Speaker 1: Here's one, for example, Kurt, I'm interested.

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Speaker 2: It is illegal to sell handcuffs to a minor. It's

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Speaker 2: not weird.

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Speaker 1: What about just sex handcuffs?

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Speaker 2: Well, double illegal in the state of New Jersey. It's

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Speaker 2: illegal to frown at a cop in Bernard's Township. It's

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Speaker 2: illegal to frown.

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Speaker 1: At all in Bernard Township.

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Speaker 2: Bernard's Township.

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Speaker 1: That's a place where that is Bernards. It's up north.

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Speaker 2: Don't frown if you're If you get a DUI in

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Speaker 2: New Jersey, I bet some of you know that you're

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Speaker 2: no longer allowed to have a custom license plate. Big

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Speaker 2: drinker bottoms up, dr NK DRV chairs, Yeah, not good.

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Speaker 2: In Trenton, it's illegal to eat pickles on Sunday.

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Speaker 3: Trenton seems to be the strangest place in New Jersey. Yes,

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Speaker 3: and I know that because when you drive in that

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Speaker 3: there's just a giant and this is for people on

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Speaker 3: the podcast.

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Speaker 1: Everyone here knows this. There's a giant a bridge that

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Speaker 1: just says what Trenton makes the world takes and it's

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Speaker 1: the most ominous way to enter any city.

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Speaker 2: Yeah that's true. Yeah, it's illegal for a man to

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Speaker 2: knit during fishing season in New Jersey. Yes, don't know

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Speaker 2: why why. I don't think they enforced it. Funny if

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Speaker 2: they did. Yeah, Oh, here's an easy one in Manville?

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Speaker 2: Is that right now? Manville? It is illegal to offer

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Speaker 2: alcohol or tobacco to zoo animals. What what was happening?

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Speaker 2: It's like man only in Mandel.

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Speaker 3: I mean, if there's a law, a lot of things

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Speaker 3: have to happen before a law gets passed.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I went wrong. Somebody did that.

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Speaker 3: Monkeys are drinking and smoking a ton at some point.

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Speaker 1: Great State's history. Not right. Before we get into the

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Speaker 1: next story, I.

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Speaker 3: Just want to give it up for to Megan Turbot,

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Speaker 3: who designed these amazing posters.

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Speaker 2: Only for these shows. This show in Brooklyn. That's it.

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Speaker 2: We're just sell these suckers out.

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Speaker 3: And it's all the people in the butt behind us

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Speaker 3: are like different stories we've done. This is my favorite story,

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Speaker 3: which is this, uh, this woman who lived with a

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Speaker 3: dolphin because NASA paid her too, and then just started

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Speaker 3: jerking the dolphin off every day.

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Speaker 2: Pretty cool and I really love hilarious.

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Speaker 1: This is a woman who baked the largest Oreo cookie.

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Speaker 2: Very cool.

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Speaker 3: This iss largest cat that's bigger than her body.

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Speaker 2: That's also cool.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's a clown.

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Speaker 2: And the one more thing before we get into it,

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Speaker 2: because we want you to be a part of the show.

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Speaker 2: If you haven't put a confession in, put a confession in,

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Speaker 2: feel free to get up. We don't have also drink

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Speaker 2: tip over tip over tip, but to be on the show,

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Speaker 2: we want everybody here to hear themselves. So in the

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Speaker 2: counter three yell your first name as loud as you can. One, two, three.

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Speaker 2: Somebody over here is going to get on.

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Speaker 3: It's still funny. It's still funny. It's a wall of

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Speaker 3: gibberish to us, and it sounds so good.

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Speaker 2: Sammy made the cut though.

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Speaker 3: We heard all right, But does anybody have a name

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Speaker 3: that like is like a just a You have to

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Speaker 3: say the classical name.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no name.

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Speaker 1: Emily, and that's my name. It's like Madonna, just Emil Lane.

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Speaker 2: Potter, what Kevin Potter? Nice name?

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Speaker 1: What does do people understand the rules?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, a full name. That's interesting to say.

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Speaker 3: Mac Primo is one. That's a great name. You have

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Speaker 3: to say the first good What is it?

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Speaker 2: Zachary Choker? Good? Whoa great name? It's a sentence.

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Speaker 1: It's an upsetting name.

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Speaker 2: What you're not? Are you?

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Speaker 1: Michael Stanley?

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Speaker 2: Michael Stanley? What?

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Speaker 1: Amy King?

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Speaker 2: Pretty? Good? Amy King? Jen Tuck gent Top gen Top.

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Speaker 2: That's a good name.

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Speaker 1: Again people not giving their real names.

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Speaker 2: Gen Top is a great name.

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Speaker 1: Oh nice, gent Top. All right, there we go.

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Speaker 2: Emo Jackson, b m Obmo Jackson. That's Jackson.

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Speaker 1: That's what we're asking, Bemo Jackson.

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Speaker 2: Give it up. We got there, all right here. We

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Speaker 2: started with Emily. We ended with Bemo Jackson. Took longer.

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Speaker 1: You guys have been drinking for a while.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 3: Dolphins recognize friends by tasting their piss, scientists find in

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Speaker 3: wild experiment.

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Speaker 1: This is from Vice. This was written by Melissa Hobson,

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Speaker 1: who happens.

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Speaker 2: To be the.

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Speaker 3: Scientists have discovered that bottlenose dolphins can recognize each other

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Speaker 3: through taste, specifically the taste of their urine. Normal published

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Speaker 3: this week in the Journal of Science Advances. The paper

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Speaker 3: by researchers at Stephen F.

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Speaker 1: Austin State University, Texas and University of Saint Andrews, Scotland. Well,

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Speaker 1: it took two schools to be like, what.

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Speaker 3: If we made dolphins taste their own piss right on

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Speaker 3: the ocean too? Found that dolphins can identify other individual

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Speaker 3: dolphins just to the taste of their pee.

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Speaker 1: Okay, the researchers discovered this while they were trying to

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Speaker 1: find out more about dolphins.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I bet they.

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Speaker 3: Were quote signature whistles. Oh, I don't know how you

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Speaker 3: go from signature whistles to drink and piss.

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Speaker 2: But let's take a look find out tonight.

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Speaker 1: Specific The specific calls they developed refer to themselves. Oh,

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Speaker 1: this is interesting.

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Speaker 3: Jason Brook, one of the studies authors, explained to Motherboard

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Speaker 3: dolphins essentially come up with their own name, but researchers

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Speaker 3: didn't know whether these work in the same way as

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Speaker 3: human names. If I name your best friend, you'll picture

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Speaker 3: them in your head, right. The scientists wanted to know

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Speaker 3: if dolphins similarly recognize others' names.

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Speaker 2: Sure.

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Speaker 3: They tested this by matching the whistles to a different

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Speaker 3: sense a human will use the same word to describe

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Speaker 3: something say, a mug, whether they see, hear, or feel it.

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Speaker 3: That's what we were trying to get at. Brooks said, Okay, okay,

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Speaker 3: you follow me so far.

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Speaker 2: I lost you there. Okay, I was up until that

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Speaker 2: point right on board.

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Speaker 1: So in order for like someone to recognize you by

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Speaker 1: looking at you, if you could, if you could identify look,

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Speaker 1: So the name has to link up with some other thing.

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Speaker 2: I see. God.

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Speaker 1: What they figured out was the name could link up

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Speaker 1: with the taste of the person. Yeah, dolphin, I'm calling

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Speaker 1: dolphins people at this point, they're close. Uh huh. To

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Speaker 1: do this, they needed to there was a tweet.

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Speaker 3: There's like a very funny tweet that's always out there,

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Speaker 3: which I don't know who said it, but it was.

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Speaker 3: The most upsetting visit by aliens would be if a

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Speaker 3: spaceship landed in the ocean, communicated with something in there

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Speaker 3: for three days and then left without talking to you man. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and that is very funny, cooler, right, Okay. They tested

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Speaker 3: this by matching the whistles to a different sense.

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Speaker 1: A human will use the same word. Ok that's what

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Speaker 1: I just said.

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Speaker 3: To do this, they needed to match and mismatch the

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Speaker 3: whistle to a different sense. That's another way of identifying

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Speaker 3: the animal. If another dolphin responded more to the match

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Speaker 3: or the mismatch, it would show they knew which individual

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Speaker 3: belonged to right, Like in.

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Speaker 2: High school you knew all your friend's cars and you'd

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Speaker 2: be like, oh shit, there's Kurt, and now I have

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Speaker 2: no idea. I've lost it.

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Speaker 3: They briefly floated, no pun intended? Why not, Melissa pun

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Speaker 3: intent intent? The idea of waterproofing a high definition TV

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Speaker 3: screen to explore visual cues totally cool, But that would

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Speaker 3: have been very heavy, very expensive, and very hard to

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Speaker 3: move around.

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Speaker 1: Yes, so that's when they made them drink piss.

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Speaker 2: Yeah that's cheap. Uh.

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Speaker 3: The scientists recalled anecdotes of dolphins swimming through excretion plumes.

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Speaker 1: That's pissed to you and me. Cool name for a

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Speaker 1: band with their mouths open.

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Speaker 2: Excretion. That's a stone pony on Friday, brought to.

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Speaker 1: You by bouncing souls. It's excretion plumes.

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Speaker 2: Uh what happened?

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Speaker 3: Dolphins can't smell because they don't have an olafactory bulb.

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Speaker 1: So sad?

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Speaker 2: What sad?

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Speaker 1: What? Oh sad?

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Speaker 2: I thought you kept going xam. I thought they were

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Speaker 2: just like humans. They can't smell.

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Speaker 5: No, I know.

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Speaker 1: That's why they never invented frozen yogurt.

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Speaker 2: Yep, we did. So.

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Speaker 3: The researchers theorized there must be somehow use the taste

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Speaker 3: of urine to gather information about its owners.

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Speaker 1: Blah blah blah blah blah. It goes on for a

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Speaker 1: long time. Here's what they did.

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Speaker 3: Okay, they put so they somehow gathered dolphin piss into

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Speaker 3: a cup.

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Speaker 2: That's gotta be hard because they're in the water all

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Speaker 2: the time. Be hard.

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Speaker 3: So that means they're taking dolphins out convincing them to piss.

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Speaker 3: And by the way, have you ever seen a at

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Speaker 3: least a man. I have no idea about female dolphins,

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Speaker 3: but a male dolphins penis.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: If there's children in the audience.

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Speaker 2: It's okay, they're gonna learn it somewhere.

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Speaker 1: It just like there's it's like, you know, they're just

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Speaker 1: a little bullet that flies through the water and then

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Speaker 1: there's just a flap that opens and it just goes

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Speaker 1: and it's like that. It looks like a hand like this.

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Speaker 3: The reason I only know this is because years ago,

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Speaker 3: my friend, who is a very he's a cool dude,

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00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:05,160
Speaker 3: but he's a very strange man sent me a video

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Speaker 3: on like without me asking of a dolphin trainer, Like

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Speaker 3: you just see the dolphin jump up and the dolphin

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Speaker 3: trainer's there, and then it just pops up and the

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Speaker 3: dude sucks the dolphins stick.

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Speaker 1: Okay, And it was like a four second clip and

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Speaker 1: I was like.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:23,240
Speaker 1: And the next day it had been removed, like it

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Speaker 1: was no longer on there.

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Speaker 2: It was the Internet a mistake. Like when I hear

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Speaker 2: stuff like that, I'm like, I'm pretty sure this was

291
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:31,440
Speaker 2: a huge mistake. We didn't need to share that.

292
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Speaker 3: So they get this dolphin to piss into a cup

293
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Speaker 3: and then they put the cup on the end of

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Speaker 3: a tiny stick I guess a long stick. Yeah, and

295
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Speaker 3: then they have the dolphin come up and taste it.

296
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Speaker 3: And it turns out, yes, they can identify each other by.

297
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Speaker 1: Their name, and that is what dolphins are doing.

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Speaker 2: News the fingerprints there, it is. It's like a little snowflake.

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Speaker 2: Everyone's different.

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Speaker 1: So yes, I identify friends a little differently.

301
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Speaker 2: God thank god that this one that direction.

302
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:07,200
Speaker 1: I I don't have a great idea for faces, and

303
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:08,080
Speaker 1: that is my fault.

304
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Speaker 2: Face blind.

305
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Speaker 3: Every No, I'm not face blind, but everybody wants you

306
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Speaker 3: to remember them, and I'm very bad.

307
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:12,600
Speaker 2: True.

308
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:16,120
Speaker 3: So instead my response to that has been, if someone

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00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:20,320
Speaker 3: acts friendly towards me, I assume that we are friends,

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Speaker 3: and so I'm very friendly to you because it's happened

311
00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:25,760
Speaker 3: so much that they that I've forgotten who you are.

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Speaker 2: Like Jack Nicholson, he's in love with everybody meets. That's

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Speaker 2: like a strategy. Houston, Hollywood.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't pretend I'm in love, but I do.

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Speaker 1: I will like be like, hey, how you doing. You know,

316
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Speaker 1: very friendly.

317
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Speaker 2: So I'm at my friends. Hey, I'm not in love

318
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Speaker 2: with you. Hey, not in love with you.

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Speaker 1: Very friendly.

320
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Speaker 2: I just wanted a picture, mister.

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Speaker 3: I was at a friend's birthday. I didn't know everyone

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Speaker 3: that he knew because it was his birthday. But the

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Speaker 3: week before it was my wife's birthday.

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Speaker 1: My wife is here give it up for Lauren, and.

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Speaker 2: And so we had been.

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Speaker 3: It was a big bar where there was like waiters

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Speaker 3: always coming to the tables, and i was a big

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00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:12,160
Speaker 3: outside area, so they're constantly coming, constantly interacting with waiters.

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Speaker 3: And we'd been there all night for my wife's birthday.

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Speaker 3: One week before then, my other friend had a birthday.

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Speaker 1: I'm there and I'm just like and I'm just like

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Speaker 1: a little nervous. I don't know all of his friends.

333
00:16:25,520 --> 00:16:28,680
Speaker 3: And this dude is talking to my friend and I'm like, oh,

334
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:31,600
Speaker 3: and I have like a warm feeling towards the person

335
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Speaker 3: who's talking to my friend.

336
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:34,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, and so I.

337
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:38,120
Speaker 3: Smile at him and he immediately smiles at me, and

338
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:40,400
Speaker 3: then I was like oh yeah, like I was right,

339
00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:42,960
Speaker 3: we do know each other. And then he immediately makes

340
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,600
Speaker 3: a bee line to come talk to me, and I.

341
00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:46,040
Speaker 1: Was like, oh fuck, oh fuck, Like who is he?

342
00:16:46,360 --> 00:16:47,480
Speaker 2: How do I know this guy? How do I know

343
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Speaker 2: this guy?

344
00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:48,160
Speaker 1: How do I know?

345
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:48,520
Speaker 2: This guy?

346
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,040
Speaker 1: Comes up? And I just go hey, man, what's up?

347
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:52,760
Speaker 1: And he's like hey, and I give him a big

348
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Speaker 1: hug and I'm like how you doing.

349
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:57,680
Speaker 3: He's like good, and I'm like and I'm like hoping

350
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Speaker 3: he's gonna give me some hint of how we know you.

351
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:03,560
Speaker 2: And I was like, so, yeah, you're still into kayaking, yes,

352
00:17:03,880 --> 00:17:04,960
Speaker 2: Like so what.

353
00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:07,320
Speaker 1: Are you up to? And he just goes, you know,

354
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:08,880
Speaker 1: I'm the server, right, and then.

355
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:12,959
Speaker 2: Just turns around away.

356
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Speaker 1: And it took me like a full five minutes to

357
00:17:15,840 --> 00:17:19,560
Speaker 1: like clear like who was like one two, he's he's

358
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Speaker 1: the waiter.

359
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:21,919
Speaker 2: Okay, that's the way I just hugged.

360
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:26,080
Speaker 1: I just hugged the waiter, totally normal. So I had

361
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Speaker 1: to marry the valet guy just to make it not

362
00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:28,600
Speaker 1: seem weird.

363
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,960
Speaker 2: Oh man, that's so good. Was it a kind of

364
00:17:31,119 --> 00:17:33,520
Speaker 2: Was it a server like a cater waiter, like coming

365
00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:35,480
Speaker 2: around all the time where he kept like saying things

366
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:35,680
Speaker 2: to you.

367
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:38,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, he was like constantly coming back and forth, just

368
00:17:38,040 --> 00:17:40,240
Speaker 3: bringing drinks. Because every time held drop a drink off,

369
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:41,040
Speaker 3: like eight more people were like.

370
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,880
Speaker 2: I was at the Newark Airport last night at midnight

371
00:17:45,080 --> 00:17:49,560
Speaker 2: and this woman, yeah, so nice. You well, I haven't

372
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:52,200
Speaker 2: been there in fifteen years, and now to change on

373
00:17:52,359 --> 00:17:58,080
Speaker 2: a full moon. Oh so midnight? So nice? Nowhere more romance,

374
00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:01,800
Speaker 2: just that air conditioners said at sixty to really cool.

375
00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,560
Speaker 2: But there's this woman who she did a thing. She

376
00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:07,879
Speaker 2: did like flybys. That's why I was hoping it was

377
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,640
Speaker 2: a cater waiter where I was waiting for my luggage

378
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:12,840
Speaker 2: and she would walk by and say one sentence and

379
00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:16,159
Speaker 2: then keep going. And she had like bedazzled glasses and stuff.

380
00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:18,160
Speaker 2: But first she was like called off to hang meet

381
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,760
Speaker 2: in here, walks by, no I'm masked up and stuff.

382
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:23,840
Speaker 2: So I'm like, oh, it's very cool. And then she

383
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:25,520
Speaker 2: comes by and she's like leave it to me to

384
00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:27,960
Speaker 2: get lost in here, and like, well, I was like,

385
00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:31,040
Speaker 2: what a cool strategy, like has zero friends but has

386
00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:33,800
Speaker 2: one million friends. She just walked by people and like

387
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:39,400
Speaker 2: takes one to know. Yeah, three times just so flyby sentences.

388
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:42,440
Speaker 2: Never saw her again, just like doing loops of the place.

389
00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:45,320
Speaker 2: Woman forties, like you know, not like somebody's like nervous,

390
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:47,399
Speaker 2: wasn't even trying to talk to me. Just walked around

391
00:18:47,440 --> 00:18:49,800
Speaker 2: like went got a carts, like carts over there. I'm like,

392
00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:53,240
Speaker 2: I don't care where. We don't know each other. She's cool.

393
00:18:53,320 --> 00:18:54,280
Speaker 2: I might have been a robot.

394
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,000
Speaker 3: I remember once when I was sixteen and with like

395
00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:01,520
Speaker 3: multiple people who are up there just people. We were

396
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,960
Speaker 3: just bored and stoned and we had nothing to do

397
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,960
Speaker 3: in It was summertime in New Jersey and we just

398
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:10,640
Speaker 3: for no reason, drove to Newark Airport at like two

399
00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:14,440
Speaker 3: in the morning and then walked around Newark Airport fun,

400
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,080
Speaker 3: just to have something to do.

401
00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:24,280
Speaker 2: Pre nine eleven, airports were wat do whatever the here's

402
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:27,320
Speaker 2: one for you, give it to me. Indy Elizabeth who

403
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,800
Speaker 2: sent many good stories in Thank you Elizabeth. All Right,

404
00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:35,439
Speaker 2: this is a funny one New York Post boom written

405
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:41,360
Speaker 2: by Ben cost He is perfect level, perfect level. We're

406
00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:41,639
Speaker 2: with you.

407
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,719
Speaker 1: We don't have to do it, we won't do it anymore.

408
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,200
Speaker 2: No, well to keep doing it. We just don't like him.

409
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:51,600
Speaker 2: Oral sex and naked couple crashing into a FedEx truck.

410
00:19:53,119 --> 00:19:58,760
Speaker 2: That's fun. I'm laughing. It was a head on collision. Literally,

411
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,560
Speaker 2: Ben cost rely is the best in the biz.

412
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:06,800
Speaker 3: I mean, we don't love the New York Posts for

413
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:08,840
Speaker 3: its politics, but goddamn they can write.

414
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:13,520
Speaker 2: They know a headline. It was a head on collision. Literally.

415
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:19,040
Speaker 2: Distracted Florida man receiving oral sex smashed directly into a

416
00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:22,800
Speaker 2: FedEx truck in Fort Lauderdale Thursday night, injuring his groin.

417
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:28,720
Speaker 2: Local police said. The unidentified man and his female companion

418
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:34,520
Speaker 2: were both found nearby. Found nearby, they lived, They left

419
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:35,120
Speaker 2: the car.

420
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:38,760
Speaker 1: They were not very much hurt, but they did fly

421
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:39,399
Speaker 1: out of the car.

422
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:43,280
Speaker 2: They were found nearby, partially naked after the collision before

423
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:49,360
Speaker 2: seven pm. Get into it Happy Hour early bird special

424
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:54,399
Speaker 2: for for seven pm on a Thursday. Get in like

425
00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:55,800
Speaker 2: that's fully dude.

426
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,040
Speaker 1: I feel like that is the end of something that

427
00:20:59,119 --> 00:21:02,840
Speaker 1: started the night, and at noon they're likely.

428
00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,600
Speaker 2: Let's go on the road trip. I love you one

429
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:11,560
Speaker 2: more for the road. You're special. You are. Images from

430
00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 2: the post crash chaos show the front ends of both

431
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:19,639
Speaker 2: vehicles badly damaged in a busy intersection. That's scary with

432
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:24,320
Speaker 2: four people lying or sitting on the ground nearby. For

433
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,840
Speaker 2: you don't need to say lying or sitting, that's fine.

434
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,600
Speaker 2: It's so funny. It's been cost d. One of the

435
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 2: victims could be seen lying on the ground with their

436
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:37,880
Speaker 2: pants around their ankles as officers send to them. Very fun.

437
00:21:39,160 --> 00:21:42,960
Speaker 2: Thursday before seven pm, fully nude in a car crash

438
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:46,359
Speaker 2: into a FedEx truck. Incredible. Rescue officials say the driver

439
00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:53,200
Speaker 2: sustained unspecified groin injuries due to the circumstances of the crash. However,

440
00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:58,200
Speaker 2: the SUV's SUV driver's penis was quote nearly bitting off,

441
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:04,120
Speaker 2: according to reports, presumably because the impact caused his companion

442
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:07,119
Speaker 2: to pipe down. Of course, as she would, you got

443
00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 2: a hold on it something.

444
00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:09,000
Speaker 1: You also get scared.

445
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:14,840
Speaker 2: You're like, oh no, yeah, I don't know. Maybe he's

446
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 2: into it. The FedEx driver and his passenger weird. Who's

447
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:21,520
Speaker 2: riding in a FedEx truck? Why is that the fact? Why?

448
00:22:21,640 --> 00:22:23,160
Speaker 2: Somehow we are? Where do you said?

449
00:22:23,240 --> 00:22:25,520
Speaker 1: Four people lying or sitting? I was like, who's the

450
00:22:25,680 --> 00:22:26,520
Speaker 1: fourth person?

451
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,960
Speaker 2: Just got on a unicycle, just like this is my

452
00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:32,480
Speaker 2: big tipoc And he was like, oh, this is just

453
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:39,800
Speaker 2: my dream. Oh boy. FedEx driver and the passenger also

454
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:44,320
Speaker 2: suffered minor injuries minor. It was unclear if any charges

455
00:22:44,359 --> 00:22:48,480
Speaker 2: would be filed against the driver or his passenger. Receiving

456
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 2: oral sex while driving is more common than one might think, Kurt,

457
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:57,600
Speaker 2: with a study conducted in by researchers at where else

458
00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:02,760
Speaker 2: would you study oral sexual driving? Then's the University of

459
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:08,400
Speaker 2: South Dakota. There's nothing going on in that state. Has

460
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:13,600
Speaker 2: anybody here? You? Are you related to anybody from South Dakota? Never? Once?

461
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:17,359
Speaker 2: Nobody is. It's there's like four hundred thousand people.

462
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,600
Speaker 3: I could just imagine them a like eighteen people in

463
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:22,880
Speaker 3: a room, just like like just tapping things.

464
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:24,840
Speaker 1: But yeah, we gotta do a study.

465
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:29,200
Speaker 3: We are It's just like we are a college. We'd

466
00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:30,760
Speaker 3: get money for studying.

467
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:32,040
Speaker 2: What can we do?

468
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:33,960
Speaker 1: And it was just silent for an hour and then

469
00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 1: someone went we could study blow jobs?

470
00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:40,360
Speaker 2: In cars, and we're like, yes, study blowjobs in cars

471
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:44,680
Speaker 2: in cars? Interesting. I was gonna say blowjobs and cars.

472
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 2: We know he already said it.

473
00:23:48,800 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 3: The guy who always comes in with the idea right

474
00:23:51,119 --> 00:23:55,240
Speaker 3: after the idea happens car, but like tries to say

475
00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 3: it louder.

476
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:59,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, we heard it when when Cynthia said it. I

477
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 2: was gonna say blow job and cars maybe would be

478
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:05,520
Speaker 2: an interesting study. I don't know. Researchers at universities South

479
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:10,359
Speaker 2: Dakota revealing that thirty seven percent of male students engaged

480
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:13,800
Speaker 2: in some manner of sex behind the wheel two students

481
00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:19,280
Speaker 2: surveyed at the university is two of the students surveyed,

482
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 2: and that was.

483
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 1: How South Dakota did studies.

484
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:24,399
Speaker 2: Will we have into the whole freshman class?

485
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:29,920
Speaker 3: One person has done it, one Troy Jaden. That is

486
00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:31,879
Speaker 3: the craziest part about all studies. It's like, well, we

487
00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:35,480
Speaker 3: have some college students. All studies are just a bunch

488
00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:36,600
Speaker 3: of college students.

489
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:38,920
Speaker 2: It will say anything for twenty five dollars or a

490
00:24:38,960 --> 00:24:43,320
Speaker 2: gift card to a local supermarket. Two of the students

491
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:47,119
Speaker 2: surveyed also reported nearly hitting other vehicles while engaging in

492
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:51,000
Speaker 2: sexual activity in the car. One third respondence reported speeding

493
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 2: while engaging in these activities, and twelve percent reported.

494
00:24:54,800 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 6: Letting go of the steering level. That is so sid Oh,

495
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:06,120
Speaker 6: this is awesome. Bison.

496
00:25:09,119 --> 00:25:12,480
Speaker 2: Oh boy, I told you this one before. Give it

497
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:15,000
Speaker 2: to me. All right. I'm gonna use fake names in

498
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,199
Speaker 2: this story because I think this is a grown man

499
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:17,920
Speaker 2: who's still alive.

500
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,199
Speaker 1: So one of have you gotten any sunburn on your

501
00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:21,880
Speaker 1: nose yet today?

502
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:23,920
Speaker 2: Nope? Not today. As soon as I got to the

503
00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:31,960
Speaker 2: airport last night, applied hundred zinc oxide. Oh boy. So

504
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:35,320
Speaker 2: growing up in Maryland, there was this dude, great guy,

505
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:39,119
Speaker 2: my age. He was an altar boys he was all

506
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 2: the things, boy scout, just an all around morally sound

507
00:25:41,880 --> 00:25:44,960
Speaker 2: great kid. We're like fourth or fifth grade. Okay, I'm

508
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:49,520
Speaker 2: gonna call him Tommy. How about Tommy? That's easy.

509
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:50,479
Speaker 1: Tommy is a great name.

510
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 2: We've all known to Tommy. Uh So, one day, you're

511
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,080
Speaker 2: supposed to go somewhere with my parents. We're supposed to

512
00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:58,800
Speaker 2: pick them up. We're supposed to go, and then his

513
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:01,560
Speaker 2: mom called. My mom was like, Tommy can't go. And

514
00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:04,920
Speaker 2: when you're a kid, that is like, what happened? Where

515
00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 2: is the body? What happened? So I see him a

516
00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:12,320
Speaker 2: week later and I'm like, what happened? He goes, Okay,

517
00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:13,840
Speaker 2: So he went to a different school in me, big

518
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:16,359
Speaker 2: public school, and they had a substitute teacher. So let's

519
00:26:16,359 --> 00:26:19,000
Speaker 2: say again, like fifth grade, eleven years old whatever that

520
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:22,119
Speaker 2: in sixth grade and substitute teacher, and the teacher's up

521
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,840
Speaker 2: at the up at the chalkboard, and he sees that

522
00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:28,480
Speaker 2: there is the substitute teacher call sheet. So he steals it.

523
00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:30,840
Speaker 2: This is like he's never done anything wrong in his life.

524
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:31,960
Speaker 4: I know.

525
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:34,920
Speaker 2: It's so funny, but it's also like the perfect type

526
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:37,280
Speaker 2: of young person behavior, where like this is so bad.

527
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:39,159
Speaker 2: I'm a rebel, my god, I know.

528
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:41,640
Speaker 1: And it's just the substitute teachers call shit.

529
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 2: It's just nine names of people are like, I just

530
00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 2: need the money, honestly, I'm trying to be a teacher.

531
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:48,480
Speaker 2: And so he steals it and folds it up and

532
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:50,200
Speaker 2: then forgets about it. And so he goes home in

533
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:53,919
Speaker 2: that afternoon and it's a Monday afternoon, and he remembers

534
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,719
Speaker 2: it and he takes it out. And this is pre

535
00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:58,520
Speaker 2: cell phone, this is pretty smartphone. This is pre caller

536
00:26:58,600 --> 00:27:02,399
Speaker 2: ID I get, And so he takes it out, and

537
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:06,800
Speaker 2: he calls his teacher, Miss Hoover, that's the substitute, And

538
00:27:07,119 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 2: so he calls and at four pm and it rings

539
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 2: and she goes hello, and this is what he said

540
00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:15,280
Speaker 2: he did with his voice. He goes Miss Hoover and

541
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:20,399
Speaker 2: she goes yes, He goes sucker cock, hangs up the phone.

542
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:27,960
Speaker 2: He does this on Tuesday at four pm, missus Hoover,

543
00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:29,600
Speaker 2: sucker cock.

544
00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,320
Speaker 3: He hung up the phone and he just ran around

545
00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 3: like he just did like eight lines of cocaine.

546
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:37,800
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, she've been red bull

547
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 2: just like yes. He does this at Wednesday at four o'clock. Meanwhile,

548
00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:44,240
Speaker 2: he's going to score every day. And when you're in

549
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:46,280
Speaker 2: fourth and fifth grade, remember when your teacher taught you

550
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,359
Speaker 2: every subject, Like it was like here's matth here says

551
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:53,760
Speaker 2: Friday rolls around. So he's like feeling confident. He calls

552
00:27:53,800 --> 00:27:57,160
Speaker 2: her at four pm and he goes ring, ring, hello,

553
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:02,080
Speaker 2: Miss Hoover, and she says, yes, Tommy, is there something

554
00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 2: you'd like to say to me? And she had Stars

555
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:07,600
Speaker 2: sixty nine him. Do you guys remember star sixty nine?

556
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:08,840
Speaker 1: Yeah?

557
00:28:09,040 --> 00:28:11,879
Speaker 2: For are animals under your age of thirty? Star sixty nine?

558
00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 2: Before call ideas you'd press that it would tell you

559
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:16,040
Speaker 2: the number that just called your house. Yeah, so he

560
00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,399
Speaker 2: she had done that and then figured out who he

561
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:21,239
Speaker 2: was and was in his class. And he hangs up

562
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:26,000
Speaker 2: and like any normal kid, he runs. He said, he

563
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:28,400
Speaker 2: ran out of his house and hid in the neighborhood.

564
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:32,720
Speaker 2: Is like all day long, his parents come home, He

565
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:36,480
Speaker 2: sees his parents' cars come home from more so he's like, okay,

566
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 2: light's going in the kitchen. He sees his brothers and

567
00:28:38,760 --> 00:28:40,760
Speaker 2: sisters every sitting down for dinner. So he's like, I

568
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:42,440
Speaker 2: was just gonna walk in and pretended like I was

569
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:46,280
Speaker 2: playing like tag and just sit down at dinner and

570
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:50,040
Speaker 2: pretty eat dinner. He walks in into the kitchen and

571
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 2: on speaker phone they're on with the teacher. Oh Tommy, yeah, Tommy,

572
00:28:57,280 --> 00:28:59,080
Speaker 2: I'm glad you said his name because almost said his room.

573
00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:04,400
Speaker 2: So Tommy said south and the parents hang up and

574
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:08,120
Speaker 2: they go, Tommy, what did you say? And he had

575
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 2: to say to his parents, now, suck on car eleven. God,

576
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 2: oh he we didn't see him for weeks and weeks

577
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 2: and weeks. That's even like bicycle privileges get taken away.

578
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 2: It's like you're not doing anything at all.

579
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,440
Speaker 1: Did you ever run away? Did you ever run away

580
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 1: as a kid?

581
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:32,920
Speaker 2: I did a few times, but never seriously. But I would.

582
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,160
Speaker 2: I would pack the bag. I would put the bag

583
00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:39,120
Speaker 2: out and be like bag of Cheetos, that's coming with me, flashlight,

584
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:45,200
Speaker 2: gonna need this Nintendo power magazine, but seid no power magazine.

585
00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 2: Maybe when I end up as a Nintendo and I'm

586
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,600
Speaker 2: gonna need to beat metrog Yeah, you need.

587
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:52,080
Speaker 1: To have those cheat codes.

588
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:54,240
Speaker 2: And then I would go far enough and get nervous

589
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 2: and come home.

590
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:57,280
Speaker 1: That's exactly what I did. I wonder if everyone's on that.

591
00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:00,160
Speaker 1: I literally I packed. I would like came home off

592
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 1: the bus and I was like a spilt milk on

593
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:06,120
Speaker 1: my shirt and I'm running away like that was enough

594
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:09,120
Speaker 1: for some reason. And so I was like eleven or twelve,

595
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:12,960
Speaker 1: and I packed my I had a sleeping bag, cool,

596
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 1: a half roll of Ritz Crackers awesome, and that's it

597
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 1: and went off into the wilderness.

598
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 3: And the wilderness across the street was from my house

599
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:27,520
Speaker 3: was just a strip of woods that to me seemed

600
00:30:27,720 --> 00:30:31,320
Speaker 3: like the Serengetti, like it was so big you were lost.

601
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 1: And I went to it recently. It is one block long.

602
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:39,080
Speaker 3: On one side is Route eighteen and on the other

603
00:30:39,280 --> 00:30:41,000
Speaker 3: side is Brighton Avenue.

604
00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:41,600
Speaker 1: And Sharker Hills.

605
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:45,160
Speaker 3: That's right, and it's just it's essentially a median of

606
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:48,680
Speaker 3: trees that I thought was the Great Wilderness, yep.

607
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:51,480
Speaker 1: And I went into this median.

608
00:30:51,280 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 3: And sat there looking over at Route eighteen with my

609
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:58,360
Speaker 3: like laid out as three pm, and then like laid

610
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:01,520
Speaker 3: out my sleeping back and be like, well, I'll get

611
00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:03,320
Speaker 3: get ready for bed at.

612
00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 2: Three pm, and I laid down.

613
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 1: I just watched, like I guess, and I ate all

614
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 1: the ritz crackers and that it was like five four

615
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 1: three two.

616
00:31:14,120 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go yeah, this was about yeah, all your

617
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:19,600
Speaker 2: anger when your kid, your anger just fades so fast

618
00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:21,720
Speaker 2: you've never been anger. And then like every forty five

619
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:22,880
Speaker 2: minutes it goes down two.

620
00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:27,360
Speaker 3: Where we at we were about to tease us into

621
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:31,640
Speaker 3: a break that love that here it is okay. The

622
00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,200
Speaker 3: Japanese titles for The Fast and the Furious movies are wonderful.

623
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:39,240
Speaker 1: I'm gonna love this so hard, so fucking fun. More

624
00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 1: for this right after these words for bnoon.

625
00:31:50,080 --> 00:32:13,080
Speaker 4: News from all the way around the world, and folks,

626
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:14,320
Speaker 4: we are back.

627
00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:17,080
Speaker 1: As ary partner.

628
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:25,000
Speaker 2: Great crowd, great crowd, great people. We love them all.

629
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 1: Do you have a Do you want any shout outs

630
00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:27,600
Speaker 1: before we get yes, I.

631
00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:32,960
Speaker 2: Do first and foremost. Kimberly is here tonight, but she

632
00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:35,000
Speaker 2: wants to shout out and Jesus has become friends through

633
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:37,440
Speaker 2: the pod and you couldn't make it, but we're gonna

634
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:39,920
Speaker 2: see Angie four more time. Kimberly, you are here. Right

635
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 2: there we go, Andrew. We hope you feel better. She'll

636
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:47,080
Speaker 2: make the next one fantastic. Amy King wants to shout

637
00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:52,800
Speaker 2: out Bob for his birthday. Bob, Bob, the Bob, Come

638
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:57,000
Speaker 2: on up. This is for you, Bud, Bob. What is it, Scott,

639
00:32:57,120 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaker 2: It's all relative, It's a book. We signed it. We

640
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 2: hope you read it forever. Oh, happy birthday, Bob.

641
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 1: And Bob gave us titos and soda.

642
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:14,120
Speaker 2: Thank you so much, Bob that he gives and he

643
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:16,280
Speaker 2: takes and he gives, and that's why we like Bob.

644
00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 2: Amy King, thank you. Mariah wants to shout up Patrick

645
00:33:20,160 --> 00:33:26,360
Speaker 2: for his birthday. Is Patrick here? Yeah, Well we got

646
00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 2: Joe Didon's slouching. George Bethlehem, this is for you, come

647
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:33,560
Speaker 2: on down. You're in the corner. You're in the hardest

648
00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 2: seat to get to. All right, come take pictures with

649
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:41,200
Speaker 2: us after the show. We look at the stuff and Cindy, Oh,

650
00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 2: Cindy from Twin Elephants want into wish. Happy Birthday, Tomorta Victoria, Victoria,

651
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 2: are you here? Yeah, there we go. This is gonna

652
00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 2: be for you. It's it's our friend made a Bank

653
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:56,200
Speaker 2: of America shirt and it's just a.

654
00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 1: Hand drawn local Bank of America.

655
00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 2: There's nothing funny about it about it's.

656
00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 1: Legitimately just copyright.

657
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 2: Really nice shirt. It's really nice shirt.

658
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:07,760
Speaker 3: It's Johnny Pemberton's shirt. He will be sued by Bank

659
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 3: of America, so you should come and.

660
00:34:08,920 --> 00:34:12,600
Speaker 2: Get it now. Who came from the furthest away? Yeah?

661
00:34:12,680 --> 00:34:17,040
Speaker 1: I bet you Where where? Middle Lake Harbor?

662
00:34:18,640 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 2: Okay, Little Lake Harbor? Oh, oh my gosh, what's that?

663
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:33,520
Speaker 2: There's more we got Oklahoma? Hi, Florida. You came from Baltimore? Baltimore? Wrong?

664
00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:41,360
Speaker 2: Where from? Yeah, that's right, homes of me. It's a

665
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:42,839
Speaker 2: college kirtie b I did?

666
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:44,120
Speaker 1: Oh, we know?

667
00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:49,239
Speaker 2: We love that. Florida for the show.

668
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:53,319
Speaker 1: What Florida for the show?

669
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 2: That sounds like lady behind you? Where are you further?

670
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:04,120
Speaker 1: Hi? It's my niece, and give it up for my niece.

671
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:09,200
Speaker 2: Everybody, Okay, Florida. Can anybody beat Florida for the show?

672
00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:11,480
Speaker 1: Can anybody for the show?

673
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:12,799
Speaker 2: All right, get on up here?

674
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:15,320
Speaker 1: Here it is you got I was the longest banana?

675
00:35:17,040 --> 00:35:17,919
Speaker 1: And what is your name?

676
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:20,640
Speaker 4: Allie?

677
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:29,560
Speaker 1: Allie's give it up for Allie. Alie telling for We're

678
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:33,040
Speaker 1: in Florida, Jupiter.

679
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 4: I'm from Little Silver and I went Oh my.

680
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:45,640
Speaker 1: God, from Little Silver, went to school in Maryland. Allie,

681
00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 1: give it up for Allie. All right, thank you Alie?

682
00:35:56,680 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 1: All right, can someone grab the confessions box?

683
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,360
Speaker 2: And we need those hot, hot confessions.

684
00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 3: We need those hot confessions. It's confession time, folks. I'm

685
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:08,800
Speaker 3: expecting some good things from Jersey.

686
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,600
Speaker 2: Oh did you guys hear the Denver show? They tore

687
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:12,520
Speaker 2: it up?

688
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,240
Speaker 1: It was they were very upsetting.

689
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:17,520
Speaker 2: Thank you so much.

690
00:36:18,080 --> 00:36:21,200
Speaker 1: Here it is somebody burnt a house down in Denver.

691
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,200
Speaker 3: Someone confessed to burning someone else's house down.

692
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:27,719
Speaker 1: This is a funny one to start off.

693
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:30,280
Speaker 3: It just says my wife is pregnant, and it's almost

694
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:31,680
Speaker 3: like she doesn't know.

695
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,000
Speaker 6: Good job.

696
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:46,719
Speaker 3: Congratulations all right, oh boy, this is what we get.

697
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:47,200
Speaker 1: This a lot.

698
00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:50,200
Speaker 2: I pooped in the woods without toilet paper. That's fine.

699
00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:53,359
Speaker 3: That's it's a great place to do it without toilet paper.

700
00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:57,960
Speaker 3: You know how many times I've done that. I glued

701
00:36:58,000 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 3: a mustache on a dead guy.

702
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:03,400
Speaker 2: Okay, that's interesting.

703
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 1: That's that's the beginning of a novel.

704
00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:09,160
Speaker 2: That's funny. Also very funny.

705
00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:14,240
Speaker 3: Also, if you didn't work at a morticians, it's really interesting.

706
00:37:14,640 --> 00:37:20,520
Speaker 2: If you killed that guy, we're calling the cops. Can't

707
00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 2: read this. This is my gosh.

708
00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:24,720
Speaker 1: I don't have a partner.

709
00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:26,520
Speaker 3: By the time I'm ready to appropriate, I plan on

710
00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:35,960
Speaker 3: having sex with with specimens who are doctors and lawyers.

711
00:37:36,120 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 2: Oh, you're just gonna go joint some doctors and lawyers.

712
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 1: All right, smart, smart, you're absolved.

713
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:42,799
Speaker 2: That's fine. Golf out there.

714
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:45,720
Speaker 3: I would say, just get better handwriting before you do anything.

715
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, think about that, because doctor's about handwriting. It's classic

716
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:51,520
Speaker 2: sicon bit. My dog is named after my ex and

717
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 2: my boyfriend doesn't know. Juicy, you're absolved.

718
00:38:00,080 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 1: Another pooped in the woods and didn't wipe. Here we

719
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:05,040
Speaker 1: go sweat totally fun to be a theme Jersey.

720
00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:10,040
Speaker 2: There's one I never considered but kind of makes sense.

721
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:16,640
Speaker 2: I tried masturbating once with chapstick. You know, Okay, that's

722
00:38:16,640 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 2: not like the craziest thing I've ever heard.

723
00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:19,000
Speaker 1: Good for you.

724
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,279
Speaker 3: Here's the listening though. The best part is like it

725
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:25,320
Speaker 3: could go either way. It could be a man or

726
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:29,839
Speaker 3: a woman. And that's the funniest part. Well, I'm doing

727
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:33,000
Speaker 3: it just like is very funny, and then a woman

728
00:38:33,120 --> 00:38:33,600
Speaker 3: doing it like.

729
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 1: This is gonna work. This is very funny as well.

730
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,960
Speaker 2: It might be nice. I don't know Winter's coming.

731
00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 3: Of course, I have a crush on Scottie, but I

732
00:38:42,239 --> 00:38:44,880
Speaker 3: have an even bigger crush on Kurt's wife Laura.

733
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:55,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, correct, that is correct. Correct. I thought this show

734
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 2: was about actual bananas. When my wife said she wanted

735
00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 2: to go Happy birthday to my wife. Happy birthday to

736
00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 2: that wife. You have a good partner.

737
00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:07,799
Speaker 1: Here's somebody I've never listened to a podcast.

738
00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 2: Now, fine, I still haven't. I kicked my then boyfriend

739
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 2: out of my dorm room because he would he wanted

740
00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 2: to have sex with me, but he had a fever

741
00:39:16,600 --> 00:39:20,719
Speaker 2: of one hundred and one degrees. This one I think sick.

742
00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 3: I'm a picture framer at a museum and hide messages

743
00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:27,640
Speaker 3: on the backsides of frame.

744
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:35,719
Speaker 2: Incredible for future, never ever stop that is so good.

745
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:38,840
Speaker 1: That is that's maybe the I'm gonna go ooh.

746
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:42,360
Speaker 2: This is a dark one and this belongs on my

747
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:47,120
Speaker 2: favorite murder. My friend and I were fucked up and

748
00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:49,640
Speaker 2: sprinkled a tiny bit of cocaine in a fish tank

749
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:52,880
Speaker 2: to see if they would have fun. The goldfish instantly die.

750
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:59,919
Speaker 2: How dare you? How dare you? Jeff?

751
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:03,280
Speaker 1: That is the people who have too much cocaine?

752
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:04,160
Speaker 2: You are Theodore?

753
00:40:04,280 --> 00:40:06,239
Speaker 5: But like, what are we gonna do with all this

754
00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:14,080
Speaker 5: extra cocaine? Should we give it to the fish? I

755
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:17,680
Speaker 5: work at a vet and I hate nine of my patients.

756
00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:20,240
Speaker 5: You're absolved.

757
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:25,319
Speaker 3: I once was hospitalized so Jersey. I was once hospitalized

758
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:26,960
Speaker 3: for mystery bruises on my thighs.

759
00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:28,520
Speaker 1: Turns out they were from.

760
00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:33,240
Speaker 4: From from beating a tambourine on my lege.

761
00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 3: For some reason, I have thought a Jersey people love tambourines.

762
00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:44,680
Speaker 2: They do. They just left music at General Tambourine. Jersey

763
00:40:44,760 --> 00:40:48,000
Speaker 2: loves a music festival more than any other state. All right,

764
00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:49,560
Speaker 2: let's get should we got to get back into it.

765
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:51,480
Speaker 2: You got one more, one more for the road, Surety.

766
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:54,719
Speaker 2: I was in an uber with a wedding date and

767
00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 2: proceeded to barf in the breast pocket of his rental talks.

768
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,040
Speaker 2: That's cool, good place.

769
00:40:59,840 --> 00:41:00,239
Speaker 5: To do it.

770
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 1: Oh wow, oh i ax, this is amazing.

771
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:09,520
Speaker 3: I accidentally sent my latest porn search to my friend

772
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:10,840
Speaker 3: group yesterday.

773
00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:16,200
Speaker 1: Oh boy, okay, all right, here it is.

774
00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:21,759
Speaker 3: The Japanese titles for The Fast and Furious movies are wonderful.

775
00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:22,880
Speaker 2: Oh you know what.

776
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry.

777
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:27,040
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry that earlier story was not sent in

778
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:29,840
Speaker 3: by copy haste. This one's sent in by copy haste.

779
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:32,120
Speaker 3: I did not choose two copyhyte stories.

780
00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:33,960
Speaker 2: It's crazy.

781
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:34,760
Speaker 1: That is crazy.

782
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:37,120
Speaker 2: He could send He sends eight to twelve a.

783
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:40,279
Speaker 1: Day, and a lot of them like connect with me

784
00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:43,160
Speaker 1: deep real good there, he's excellent. It's like they're either

785
00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:46,320
Speaker 1: birds or buttthhole stories, and it's like, that's this whole podcast.

786
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:50,080
Speaker 1: So this is my This is in the Hollywood Reporter.

787
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:57,200
Speaker 1: That's real by James Hibbard, who is the all right, great.

788
00:41:57,520 --> 00:42:01,160
Speaker 3: The Japanese release titles of The Fast and the Furious

789
00:42:01,280 --> 00:42:04,439
Speaker 3: movies are amazing. Yes, I believe this to be true,

790
00:42:04,520 --> 00:42:08,000
Speaker 3: with the latest entry F nine blowing up domestic box office.

791
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:09,040
Speaker 3: Thank you, Hollywood Reporter.

792
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 1: Really enjoy these alternative titles, which have been circulated to

793
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 1: appreciative amazement on Reddit, and we're confirmed late Friday by

794
00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:20,280
Speaker 1: Universal Pictures for all nine movies in the franchise. Okay,

795
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:23,040
Speaker 1: all right, Fast and the Furious. You want to give

796
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:23,960
Speaker 1: your your getting up?

797
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:27,680
Speaker 2: What the what Japan called Fast and the Furious one? Yeah,

798
00:42:30,360 --> 00:42:31,080
Speaker 2: let's go with.

799
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:36,120
Speaker 1: Whatever you say is probably gonna be better than day

800
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 1: Buckle up, Wild Speed, Wild Speed.

801
00:42:41,320 --> 00:42:41,839
Speaker 2: That's cool.

802
00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:46,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, too fast, too furious, Wild Speed times two? Okay,

803
00:42:46,920 --> 00:42:50,320
Speaker 3: all right, Fast and the Furious, Tokyo Drift Sure, Wild.

804
00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:55,840
Speaker 1: Speed times three, Tokyo Drifts. Oh, okay, I know that

805
00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:59,560
Speaker 1: Fast and Furious just fast. I love for the fourth one.

806
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:00,840
Speaker 1: It went fast and furious.

807
00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:01,600
Speaker 2: What are we doing?

808
00:43:01,760 --> 00:43:06,160
Speaker 7: Just call it the name Wild Speed Max Fast five,

809
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:12,399
Speaker 7: Wild Speed Megamax if it ain't broke, Fast and Furious six,

810
00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:19,680
Speaker 7: Wild Speed euro Mission, Furious seven, Wild Speed sky Mission.

811
00:43:20,239 --> 00:43:23,120
Speaker 3: Also, there is a podcast in Japan that's going do

812
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:25,600
Speaker 3: you guys know what the fast what Wild Speed is

813
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:26,480
Speaker 3: called in America?

814
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 1: And they're going fast and Furious, too fast, too, Furious

815
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 1: Fast and Furious.

816
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 3: Fast five Fast and Furious six, Furious seven.

817
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:40,319
Speaker 2: That's a great franchise that we love, dearly.

818
00:43:40,360 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 1: Furious seven Wild Speed Sky Mission.

819
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:44,720
Speaker 2: Yep, they're going out of space.

820
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:49,640
Speaker 3: The Fate of the Furious Wild Speed Ice break Fast

821
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:53,960
Speaker 3: and Furious presents Hobbs and Shaw Wild Speed super Combo.

822
00:43:57,480 --> 00:44:00,720
Speaker 2: And they hate each other's guts, by the way, Jason

823
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:04,719
Speaker 2: Statham hate each other like it's real. They really do.

824
00:44:05,040 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 1: I think everyone at this point is just like, oh,

825
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,439
Speaker 1: you better keep me away from them. And F nine

826
00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:11,960
Speaker 1: is Wild Speed Jet.

827
00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:14,560
Speaker 2: Break Sure don't make any sense.

828
00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:16,319
Speaker 1: So this reminds me I had.

829
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:19,800
Speaker 3: I had a girlfriend when I was seven, thank you,

830
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:22,960
Speaker 3: thank you very much, seventeen years old.

831
00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:24,520
Speaker 1: She lived in Bradley Beach.

832
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:28,840
Speaker 2: That's close you guys know are.

833
00:44:29,239 --> 00:44:32,360
Speaker 1: Her dad was a Harley guy. He was like a

834
00:44:32,640 --> 00:44:37,319
Speaker 1: deep Harley guy, but also very Christian, a Christian Harley guy,

835
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,080
Speaker 1: and he fucking hated my guts.

836
00:44:41,239 --> 00:44:41,399
Speaker 6: Uh.

837
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 1: And he's nice guy, nice guy, but at the time

838
00:44:45,200 --> 00:44:47,520
Speaker 1: I was not like you would bad guy just looked

839
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:48,239
Speaker 1: like a dirt bag.

840
00:44:49,320 --> 00:44:49,440
Speaker 5: Uh.

841
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:53,200
Speaker 1: And I remember once we were We're at the Golden

842
00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 1: Star Diner, which I don't think exists anymore.

843
00:44:55,600 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 3: We're all having food or whatever, and she was like,

844
00:44:57,960 --> 00:44:59,880
Speaker 3: out of the blue, she just said, did you know

845
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:03,000
Speaker 3: when you sneeze, you sneeze at seven hundred miles per hour.

846
00:45:03,160 --> 00:45:03,319
Speaker 2: Huh.

847
00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:05,759
Speaker 1: And I was like, I don't think that's true.

848
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:07,040
Speaker 2: Cool conversation.

849
00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:09,239
Speaker 1: She's like, no, true.

850
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 3: I was like, I think maybe seventy miles per hour

851
00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:15,600
Speaker 3: because seven hundred miles is the speed of sound, so

852
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:19,400
Speaker 3: when you sneezed, it would break the speed of sound.

853
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:20,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it would be like.

854
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:24,120
Speaker 2: How boom, you would blow the back of your brain out.

855
00:45:25,040 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 1: And she got very angry and then talk to me

856
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:27,920
Speaker 1: for the rest of the night.

857
00:45:28,040 --> 00:45:28,320
Speaker 2: Fine.

858
00:45:28,719 --> 00:45:32,000
Speaker 3: But her dad used to have a shirt that was amazing.

859
00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:34,359
Speaker 3: It said on the front he would open the door

860
00:45:34,360 --> 00:45:36,719
Speaker 3: and like stare at me. It just said God's Jim

861
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:39,279
Speaker 3: on the front, and then on the back it was

862
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:40,600
Speaker 3: Jesus with.

863
00:45:40,719 --> 00:45:45,360
Speaker 1: A crucifix on his back but doing a doing a

864
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:48,400
Speaker 1: push up. Sure, and it just said bench press this.

865
00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:50,320
Speaker 2: Cool.

866
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:53,160
Speaker 1: And it was like so amazing because he wasn't bench

867
00:45:53,280 --> 00:45:58,640
Speaker 1: pressing the cross. He was definitely doing a push up

868
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:02,799
Speaker 1: with it on is back. Oh I see, but yeah,

869
00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:03,480
Speaker 1: bench press.

870
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:06,120
Speaker 2: Then we got those nails out of there. Yeah, that

871
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:13,920
Speaker 2: was the hard part. What's the best Dad's competitive dance?

872
00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:16,279
Speaker 2: Oh yeah? I made a fart sound once in high

873
00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:20,040
Speaker 2: school as a joke, and my girlfriend's mom came and

874
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:22,320
Speaker 2: talked to me because she was like, Michael, who is

875
00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:24,839
Speaker 2: the dad. She was like, Michael is ready to ban

876
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 2: you from the house for doing that. I think you

877
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:29,400
Speaker 2: need to go apologize to him. And I had to

878
00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:32,080
Speaker 2: walk in and be like, I'm so sorry. I just

879
00:46:32,239 --> 00:46:35,200
Speaker 2: was making a joke and yeah, I mean I was

880
00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:37,920
Speaker 2: in the kitchen I was probably sixteen or seventeen with

881
00:46:38,160 --> 00:46:41,799
Speaker 2: my then girlfriend and the parents were watching a movie

882
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:44,319
Speaker 2: or something, and they're like, hey, guys, we're gonna pause

883
00:46:44,360 --> 00:46:47,319
Speaker 2: the movie or whatever, and I just went like as

884
00:46:47,320 --> 00:46:49,840
Speaker 2: loud as I could, very funny, and then like it

885
00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:52,759
Speaker 2: was like quiet, and the movie started, and then the

886
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 2: mom comes in and it's like, you're gonna have to

887
00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:56,879
Speaker 2: go in there and apologize because to the dad. Yeah,

888
00:46:56,880 --> 00:46:59,439
Speaker 2: because I disrespected his house or something.

889
00:46:59,680 --> 00:47:00,960
Speaker 1: Making a fart noise.

890
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:03,800
Speaker 2: Hey, you know that's crazy. I'll do it at his

891
00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:04,520
Speaker 2: funeral too.

892
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:07,040
Speaker 1: All.

893
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 2: I'm gonna love him.

894
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:13,680
Speaker 1: At my house. My children call me doctor professor poopy Pans.

895
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:18,080
Speaker 1: Here he comes, mister poopy Pants, and then I come in.

896
00:47:18,160 --> 00:47:24,759
Speaker 1: I just go, yeah, because you're a great dads.

897
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:28,600
Speaker 2: Love You're raising awesome kids, all right, Katie MLX sent

898
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 2: this in and we're doing this one in honor of

899
00:47:30,719 --> 00:47:35,520
Speaker 2: our best in the beers. Ness. Okay, Welshmann drinks at

900
00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:39,600
Speaker 2: fifty six pubs in twenty four hours to break Guinness

901
00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:44,240
Speaker 2: World records. What fifty six pubs in twenty four hours?

902
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:48,080
Speaker 1: What so that's more than two two an hours?

903
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:52,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, over two an hour two three? Oh god. This

904
00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:56,360
Speaker 2: was in USA, USA today. I mean the colorful newspaper

905
00:47:56,440 --> 00:47:59,080
Speaker 2: that we all read at hotels, written by Scott best

906
00:47:59,120 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 2: in the business, Gleasa. Come on give us this is

907
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:03,759
Speaker 2: gonna be your last one A loud one one two three.

908
00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:07,760
Speaker 1: Thank you, we appreciate.

909
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:10,239
Speaker 2: I bet you yell your own first name's louder one

910
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:14,880
Speaker 2: two three. Yep, you do you do it? Damn it,

911
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:26,879
Speaker 2: Bemo Jackson, greatnme Emily. That's pretty good.

912
00:48:27,800 --> 00:48:29,040
Speaker 1: I understood the assignment.

913
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:31,840
Speaker 2: Welshman drinks at fifty six pubs and twenty four hours.

914
00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:35,800
Speaker 2: A welsh Man named Gareth Murphy visited fifty six pubs

915
00:48:35,840 --> 00:48:39,040
Speaker 2: in twenty four hours, snapping the previous pub crawl record

916
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,799
Speaker 2: of fifty one. This is according to a release from

917
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:45,520
Speaker 2: the Guinness Book of World Records, so it's official. He

918
00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:48,440
Speaker 2: really did do this okay, the twenty nine year old

919
00:48:48,520 --> 00:48:54,080
Speaker 2: it worker from God, I don't know how to say that. Kernarfon, Wales. Yep,

920
00:48:54,280 --> 00:48:58,120
Speaker 2: that's it. Sarnophon nexcelle.

921
00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:02,200
Speaker 1: Ex Yeah, yeah, no one knows that.

922
00:49:02,600 --> 00:49:05,840
Speaker 2: No one in New Jersey knows. Okay, you could just

923
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:06,480
Speaker 2: move on.

924
00:49:06,680 --> 00:49:08,400
Speaker 1: If you're asking for conformation'd be like.

925
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:14,239
Speaker 2: Mm hmm, absolutely cheez quake. I'll give it up all right.

926
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 2: You used to be cheese quake now. The John bon Jovi.

927
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 1: And where we drove by, My wife was like, why

928
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 1: is it.

929
00:49:22,920 --> 00:49:23,879
Speaker 2: John bon Jovi.

930
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:26,000
Speaker 1: Shouldn't it just be bon Jovi? I was like, No,

931
00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:28,279
Speaker 1: bon Jovi's the band. John bon Jovi is the guy.

932
00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:29,120
Speaker 1: This is for him.

933
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:30,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's his life.

934
00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:32,680
Speaker 1: It's not the band.

935
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:33,479
Speaker 2: Fuck the band.

936
00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:37,239
Speaker 1: Imagine how mad the band is. It'd be like, oh,

937
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,719
Speaker 1: he gets the rest stop and none of us do.

938
00:49:40,239 --> 00:49:44,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe a little Tico's tacos damp so.

939
00:49:44,880 --> 00:49:47,880
Speaker 1: Che's Quake was the funniest name for a wrest the

940
00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 1: weirdest name ever, Gee's quake.

941
00:49:50,719 --> 00:49:53,560
Speaker 2: Oh, I've like, I've never done a quadruple take before

942
00:49:53,600 --> 00:49:55,560
Speaker 2: while driving where I'm like, What's what?

943
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:56,200
Speaker 5: No?

944
00:49:57,120 --> 00:50:02,480
Speaker 2: Also something Whales. This is from Karen farn or we're

945
00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 2: gonna call it Excellent Whales. Yeah, somebody told me Yosemi

946
00:50:06,680 --> 00:50:10,520
Speaker 2: National Park is half the size of Wales. I don't

947
00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:13,080
Speaker 2: know if that's true. For the rest of your life.

948
00:50:13,120 --> 00:50:14,880
Speaker 2: Bring that up all the time, you know what.

949
00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:17,440
Speaker 3: I love it as a fact because I have no

950
00:50:17,640 --> 00:50:21,040
Speaker 3: idea how big either are. That's right, nobody does it

951
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:22,560
Speaker 3: give me a good idea.

952
00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:25,360
Speaker 1: I've never just been in YOSEMITI.

953
00:50:24,960 --> 00:50:27,040
Speaker 2: Like, I'm gonna walk this thing or whatever.

954
00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:29,160
Speaker 1: I've never been in Yosemite.

955
00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:35,839
Speaker 2: At heart, it's on fire, don't go for twenty nine

956
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:39,880
Speaker 2: year old it worker from Excellent Wales broke the record

957
00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:43,920
Speaker 2: and that was a that was officially verified tuesday. He

958
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:47,600
Speaker 2: surpassed an Englishman, of course, named Matt Ellis, who said

959
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:49,160
Speaker 2: it in twenty twenty one. So this is like a

960
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:52,480
Speaker 2: very competitive ongoing thing. That's weird. According to Guinness, a

961
00:50:52,560 --> 00:50:55,480
Speaker 2: person who dares to try and break this record must

962
00:50:55,560 --> 00:50:58,560
Speaker 2: have video evidence and a logbook signed by an employee

963
00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:03,520
Speaker 2: at every pub visited. Sounds fun for eight to ten beers,

964
00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:04,120
Speaker 2: but also.

965
00:51:03,920 --> 00:51:06,720
Speaker 3: Can you imagine trying to get the fifty six person

966
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:08,160
Speaker 3: signed the logbook?

967
00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:20,520
Speaker 2: I mean some yeah, just signed the bloody thing. According

968
00:51:20,520 --> 00:51:23,879
Speaker 2: to Ginnis. Yeah, logbooks some by every employee the pub

969
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:28,680
Speaker 2: visited to confirm a drink was both purchased and consumed.

970
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 2: The pub must be an establishment licenses alcoholic beverages. You

971
00:51:33,160 --> 00:51:36,120
Speaker 2: just can't walk up to the stranger and say Brian's house.

972
00:51:37,400 --> 00:51:39,880
Speaker 2: Brian signed this. You owe me, dude, seriously, you do.

973
00:51:41,800 --> 00:51:44,880
Speaker 2: Murphy said, quote, this was the hardest thing I've ever

974
00:51:44,960 --> 00:51:45,759
Speaker 2: done in my life.

975
00:51:49,320 --> 00:51:52,000
Speaker 1: Oh, you got to admire his commitment.

976
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 2: Quote. The hardest part, by far was the bloatedness of

977
00:51:56,640 --> 00:51:57,640
Speaker 2: drinking so much.

978
00:51:58,560 --> 00:52:00,839
Speaker 3: I liked that he was like probably king beer because

979
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 3: it's the whales exactly, but also like fifty six in

980
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:06,680
Speaker 3: a day.

981
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:12,440
Speaker 2: That is crazy. It didn't help that I can't make

982
00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:13,680
Speaker 2: myself burp either.

983
00:52:16,480 --> 00:52:20,640
Speaker 1: I think that should be a different subset of this kid. Yeah, wreckers.

984
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:23,200
Speaker 1: There should be people who've done it and then people

985
00:52:23,200 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 1: who've done it who can't burn.

986
00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:27,640
Speaker 2: So what does he do?

987
00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:30,400
Speaker 1: How many times did he vomit?

988
00:52:30,560 --> 00:52:32,759
Speaker 2: Is my question? Yeah, I don't know if you're allowed to,

989
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:35,800
Speaker 2: but we'll find out right. The key, according to Murphy,

990
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:39,040
Speaker 2: was discharging in the restroom, just like your dolphin friends,

991
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:43,040
Speaker 2: discharging discharging in the restroom.

992
00:52:42,719 --> 00:52:44,960
Speaker 1: Discharging in the restroom.

993
00:52:44,640 --> 00:52:47,000
Speaker 2: To continually make more room for the alcohol.

994
00:52:47,280 --> 00:52:49,280
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't think he's peeing folks.

995
00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:54,640
Speaker 2: Quote. I lost count how many toilet breaks I took. Yeah,

996
00:52:54,680 --> 00:52:55,640
Speaker 2: I bet you did, bud.

997
00:52:55,880 --> 00:52:58,160
Speaker 1: For some reason, I caught myself the other day.

998
00:52:58,280 --> 00:52:59,080
Speaker 2: I don't know why.

999
00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:02,959
Speaker 3: My daughter, my daughters five, and we were like talking

1000
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:04,480
Speaker 3: about eating or something. I was like, do you know

1001
00:53:04,600 --> 00:53:07,319
Speaker 3: in ancient Rome they used to have vomitoriums and when

1002
00:53:07,400 --> 00:53:10,359
Speaker 3: people would eat soh. I remember she was laying down

1003
00:53:10,440 --> 00:53:12,040
Speaker 3: and eating and I was like, that's not healthy.

1004
00:53:12,160 --> 00:53:12,840
Speaker 1: Don't do that.

1005
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:15,440
Speaker 3: And I was like, actually, ancient Romans, that's how they ate.

1006
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:17,239
Speaker 3: They would like lay down and then they would vomit

1007
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:19,600
Speaker 3: in a vomitorium and they would stick a little feather

1008
00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:21,719
Speaker 3: down their throat and make themselves throap so they could

1009
00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:22,080
Speaker 3: eat more.

1010
00:53:22,160 --> 00:53:23,920
Speaker 1: My wife's like, what are you doing?

1011
00:53:25,440 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 2: Stop it?

1012
00:53:26,960 --> 00:53:29,120
Speaker 1: And I was like, this is very interesting.

1013
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:32,319
Speaker 2: Well, it's like when the scrambting thing came out two

1014
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 2: weeks ago, scrammitting, scream vomiting. No. So someone wrote an

1015
00:53:38,000 --> 00:53:40,080
Speaker 2: article about that weed is so strong now that people

1016
00:53:40,080 --> 00:53:42,080
Speaker 2: are addicted to weed, and if you smoke so much weed,

1017
00:53:42,160 --> 00:53:44,080
Speaker 2: you scram it. What it's true.

1018
00:53:44,560 --> 00:53:46,360
Speaker 1: I looked it up as like, this can't be Has

1019
00:53:46,480 --> 00:53:47,680
Speaker 1: anyone scrammeted here?

1020
00:53:47,840 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 2: Who's scraminted? Yes, drama, But apparently it's like people used

1021
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:54,520
Speaker 2: to smoke a bunch of joints. They are like two

1022
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,200
Speaker 2: milligrams of tch and now they're like eighteen, and so

1023
00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:00,160
Speaker 2: you can get so high that you scream vomit. It's

1024
00:54:00,160 --> 00:54:02,600
Speaker 2: called scramating, and it's actually called scramating.

1025
00:54:02,760 --> 00:54:04,080
Speaker 1: Oh, it's so upsetting.

1026
00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:08,200
Speaker 2: I went on bing. I was on bing all day

1027
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:16,120
Speaker 2: for one search. It took that long. Murphy said. At

1028
00:54:16,160 --> 00:54:19,080
Speaker 2: the beginning it was minimal. How many toilet breaks I take?

1029
00:54:19,200 --> 00:54:24,720
Speaker 2: Relax Gareth once every ten pubs. I'd say, okay, it's crazy.

1030
00:54:24,920 --> 00:54:25,600
Speaker 2: He broke the seat.

1031
00:54:25,760 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 3: He went to the bathroom once every ten beers. No,

1032
00:54:29,800 --> 00:54:30,520
Speaker 3: that's insane.

1033
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:32,800
Speaker 2: But by the end I think I was going every

1034
00:54:33,320 --> 00:54:37,319
Speaker 2: two or three pubs. Again insane. You'd think, every single.

1035
00:54:37,160 --> 00:54:39,200
Speaker 1: Time I have a drink, go to the bathroom and pee.

1036
00:54:39,640 --> 00:54:40,440
Speaker 1: Now one time.

1037
00:54:40,520 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 2: I don't know if we talked about this on the

1038
00:54:41,680 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 2: pub before, but Kurt and I were in Scotland with

1039
00:54:43,560 --> 00:54:45,840
Speaker 2: Kristin Shaw and we were hiking and it was a

1040
00:54:46,080 --> 00:54:49,560
Speaker 2: gorgeous day what is it called Arthur's bench, Arthur's seat,

1041
00:54:49,760 --> 00:54:50,279
Speaker 2: Arthur's seat.

1042
00:54:50,440 --> 00:54:53,160
Speaker 3: We were hiking in Edinburgh. It's this gorgeous mountain it

1043
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:55,080
Speaker 3: like overlooks Edinburgh. It's amazing.

1044
00:54:55,160 --> 00:54:58,399
Speaker 2: Everybody should go. Yeah, and we're all having a nice,

1045
00:54:58,440 --> 00:55:01,040
Speaker 2: normal conversation talking about how we are to do comedy

1046
00:55:01,040 --> 00:55:04,560
Speaker 2: in another country, and then Kirk just goes old man

1047
00:55:04,680 --> 00:55:10,319
Speaker 2: tea kettle and instantly starts peeing, and Kristen lost her mind.

1048
00:55:10,440 --> 00:55:11,360
Speaker 2: She was livid.

1049
00:55:11,560 --> 00:55:13,360
Speaker 1: She was so mad that I was peeing.

1050
00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:16,480
Speaker 2: And I was like, what what She's like? You just

1051
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:18,880
Speaker 2: started peeing on the trail. Yeah, And I was like,

1052
00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 2: I said, old man teakettle. So if you're gonna pee

1053
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:25,920
Speaker 2: in front of your friends one to one and a

1054
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:31,160
Speaker 2: half feet away, just say old man teakettle and it's fine. Also,

1055
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:33,279
Speaker 2: I think I see Rob, Rob, Remember when yelled wild

1056
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:35,320
Speaker 2: Sage and almost tried to kill you. Do you remember that?

1057
00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:36,000
Speaker 2: That was cool?

1058
00:55:36,640 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 3: I kicked Rob's right here. We were like camping and

1059
00:55:39,160 --> 00:55:41,640
Speaker 3: this was actually like a dangerous area. It was in

1060
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:43,760
Speaker 3: California and we're like on the side of a cliff

1061
00:55:43,760 --> 00:55:46,160
Speaker 3: and I just went, well Sage and I kicked him

1062
00:55:46,160 --> 00:55:48,680
Speaker 3: in the butt, like and he almost fell down the

1063
00:55:48,760 --> 00:55:51,200
Speaker 3: side of a mountain and then was like that was

1064
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:53,200
Speaker 3: like the like the kind of the prank way.

1065
00:55:53,560 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 2: That was if you're almost going to kill somebody, you

1066
00:55:55,320 --> 00:55:57,440
Speaker 2: just have your wild sage and then it's fine and

1067
00:55:57,520 --> 00:55:59,600
Speaker 2: then it's a prank. Kick these with you get touches

1068
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:02,040
Speaker 2: on your life later with these words on a page,

1069
00:56:03,640 --> 00:56:06,440
Speaker 2: grip you accomplished a fine Cardiff, the capital city of Wales,

1070
00:56:06,480 --> 00:56:08,840
Speaker 2: with the city's high density of pubs and bars ranking

1071
00:56:08,880 --> 00:56:12,800
Speaker 2: as the highest in the UK per square mile. Quote.

1072
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:15,239
Speaker 2: I knew the best place to do this was in

1073
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:18,239
Speaker 2: the center of Cardiff. He said. It was a long,

1074
00:56:18,640 --> 00:56:23,279
Speaker 2: awful and tiring day. All right, I bet Jersey can

1075
00:56:23,360 --> 00:56:27,480
Speaker 2: beat it. I don't know I've ever told you this

1076
00:56:27,560 --> 00:56:31,880
Speaker 2: onety oh yeah, give it to me. So in twenty thirteen,

1077
00:56:32,239 --> 00:56:34,960
Speaker 2: I You're the dragon. Ooh, yes it was.

1078
00:56:35,160 --> 00:56:39,279
Speaker 1: I don't know if it was nobody does people did.

1079
00:56:39,440 --> 00:56:42,720
Speaker 2: There were some young writers that were fresh out NYU

1080
00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:44,880
Speaker 2: in La and I was kind of mentoring them, kind

1081
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:46,680
Speaker 2: of giving them tips. And they'd written a short film.

1082
00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:49,960
Speaker 2: And the short film gets in south By, Okay, And

1083
00:56:50,040 --> 00:56:53,680
Speaker 2: they go to south By Southwest and they're just eager

1084
00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:56,560
Speaker 2: and they're pumped, and I felt like, I think at

1085
00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:58,640
Speaker 2: the time it was probably like twenty eight ish or so,

1086
00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:00,680
Speaker 2: and so I just felt like the older brother. I

1087
00:57:00,800 --> 00:57:02,400
Speaker 2: was like, this is how you handle it. This is

1088
00:57:02,440 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 2: what you do when you get interviews, if agents and

1089
00:57:04,640 --> 00:57:06,400
Speaker 2: managers come, this is how you talk. And they're like

1090
00:57:06,520 --> 00:57:09,640
Speaker 2: so giddy. They're great guys. So I'm asleep south By.

1091
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:12,760
Speaker 2: It's three am. My cell phone starts ringing, ringing, ringing,

1092
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:17,680
Speaker 2: and I answer it and it's two guys and one guy, Danny,

1093
00:57:17,920 --> 00:57:20,600
Speaker 2: calls me and he's like, I don't know where I

1094
00:57:20,640 --> 00:57:24,840
Speaker 2: am and somebody's chasing me. It's twenty one years old.

1095
00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:28,160
Speaker 2: So and also like young man, you're kind of like,

1096
00:57:28,280 --> 00:57:29,760
Speaker 2: oh no, I have a good time. And I'm like,

1097
00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:32,840
Speaker 2: hey man, what's up. And he's like, somebody's been chasing

1098
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:35,320
Speaker 2: me for hours. I'm like, where are you? He goes,

1099
00:57:35,440 --> 00:57:38,120
Speaker 2: I'm in Austin for south By, And I go where

1100
00:57:38,200 --> 00:57:39,840
Speaker 2: are you? Where are you in the city? And I

1101
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:42,280
Speaker 2: don't think i'd ever been Austin maybe once. At that point,

1102
00:57:42,560 --> 00:57:44,840
Speaker 2: he goes, oh, no, it's dark. I can't see any signs.

1103
00:57:45,360 --> 00:57:48,120
Speaker 2: And so I'm like, what does this get? Going through?

1104
00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:50,880
Speaker 2: And South buzzn't like a lot of people are there,

1105
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:54,800
Speaker 2: and I'm like, okay, read street signs. Read street signs.

1106
00:57:54,880 --> 00:57:57,040
Speaker 2: What did the street signs say? And like at this point,

1107
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:58,720
Speaker 2: I'm sitting up in bed and I'm like getting on

1108
00:57:58,760 --> 00:58:00,680
Speaker 2: my laptop to go and google man apps. He's like,

1109
00:58:00,760 --> 00:58:03,240
Speaker 2: there are no street signs. I got lost, and I'm like,

1110
00:58:03,320 --> 00:58:06,120
Speaker 2: where is Jack? That's his writing partner. I'm like, where's Jack.

1111
00:58:06,160 --> 00:58:08,280
Speaker 2: He's like, I don't know. I haven't seen him. And

1112
00:58:08,480 --> 00:58:12,320
Speaker 2: I'm like, so three am Uber was brand new. I

1113
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:15,480
Speaker 2: go call Uber. He goes, I don't know what that is.

1114
00:58:15,720 --> 00:58:17,880
Speaker 2: I go, okay. So then I'm talking a twenty one

1115
00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:20,440
Speaker 2: year old drunk how to download an app on his

1116
00:58:20,560 --> 00:58:23,720
Speaker 2: phone and he keeps hanging up on me, and so

1117
00:58:23,840 --> 00:58:25,520
Speaker 2: he calls me back again after hanging up on me,

1118
00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:28,080
Speaker 2: and he goes, they're chasing me. They're chasing me. I go,

1119
00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:30,880
Speaker 2: who who's chasing you? Are you okay? He goes, they're

1120
00:58:30,920 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 2: chasing me and I here like all that. Now I'm

1121
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:38,440
Speaker 2: in my living room and I'm like looking through all

1122
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:41,760
Speaker 2: the emails and I'm trying to find Jack. And he's scared.

1123
00:58:41,840 --> 00:58:43,720
Speaker 2: He's like, I don't know what's going on, and it's

1124
00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:47,080
Speaker 2: is so crazy, and I'm like, Danny, standstill, call uber,

1125
00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:48,760
Speaker 2: call uper? What is his the name of your hotel?

1126
00:58:48,840 --> 00:58:50,520
Speaker 2: So he does that, and so I find all his

1127
00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:53,880
Speaker 2: emails and I find Jack, and I called Jack's number

1128
00:58:53,880 --> 00:58:56,240
Speaker 2: and he's like hello. I go Jack, Hey man, it's Scott.

1129
00:58:56,280 --> 00:58:58,760
Speaker 2: He goes, Scotty, what's going on? I go, Danny's lost.

1130
00:58:58,840 --> 00:59:01,000
Speaker 2: Somebody's chasing him. Have you and him? He goes, that's me.

1131
00:59:01,600 --> 00:59:03,560
Speaker 2: I've been following him for three and a half hours.

1132
00:59:04,280 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 2: He got blackout trunk at the Red carpet. I've been

1133
00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:11,360
Speaker 2: asking him to come back to the hotel. I go,

1134
00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 2: have you been chasing? He goes, I've been walking less

1135
00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:16,040
Speaker 2: than half a mile per hour. He looks at me

1136
00:59:16,120 --> 00:59:19,640
Speaker 2: and runs away. We went to college together, we lived together.

1137
00:59:20,640 --> 00:59:22,880
Speaker 2: I go, well, he's really scared. He goes wait. So

1138
00:59:23,200 --> 00:59:27,400
Speaker 2: Jack goes wait, he's getting into a car. I go,

1139
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:29,640
Speaker 2: it's called an uber. It's like a car thing. He goes, no,

1140
00:59:29,720 --> 00:59:33,320
Speaker 2: it's like a random car. So I go, Jack scared,

1141
00:59:33,720 --> 00:59:36,120
Speaker 2: So he's running. I go where are He goes, We're

1142
00:59:36,160 --> 00:59:39,320
Speaker 2: two blocks from the hotel. So that Danny gets in

1143
00:59:39,400 --> 00:59:42,920
Speaker 2: the uber, it goes two blocks the hotel, Jack runs back,

1144
00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:46,520
Speaker 2: opens the door for Enity on the phone on Jack's

1145
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:50,040
Speaker 2: MoMA here. Danny goes, Jack, what are you doing? And

1146
00:59:50,160 --> 00:59:52,200
Speaker 2: he goes, Okay, Scottie, I got him. And they walk

1147
00:59:52,280 --> 00:59:56,800
Speaker 2: in the hotel room together, folks, and that is buddy.

1148
01:00:02,040 --> 01:00:05,200
Speaker 3: Let's have you, guys, Scream bananas to end this episode

1149
01:00:05,280 --> 01:00:07,160
Speaker 3: on three one two three.

1150
01:00:09,960 --> 01:00:10,800
Speaker 2: Thank you so much.

1151
01:00:10,880 --> 01:00:15,120
Speaker 1: Guys, We're gonna be selling out taking pictures.

1152
01:00:15,200 --> 01:00:19,160
Speaker 2: Come say hi, good night, good night, thank you, thank

1153
01:00:19,200 --> 01:00:31,840
Speaker 2: you so much. Bananas is an exactly right media production.

1154
01:00:32,040 --> 01:00:35,520
Speaker 1: Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine. The catchy banana

1155
01:00:35,600 --> 01:00:38,640
Speaker 1: theme song was composed and performed by Kahan. Artwork for

1156
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:41,520
Speaker 1: Bananas was designed by Travis Millard, and.

1157
01:00:41,600 --> 01:00:44,640
Speaker 2: Our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and Georgia

1158
01:00:44,720 --> 01:00:45,200
Speaker 2: Hartstart

1159
01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:48,600
Speaker 1: And Lisa Maggott is our full human, not a robot intern.