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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's teamed up with Lil John

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Speaker 1: to create a new bottled water called turned Down for

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Speaker 1: Whatcher Why.

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Speaker 2: I was supposed to make it twelve years ago, but

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Speaker 2: I say it's very old. I couldn't hold it in

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Speaker 2: any longer.

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Speaker 1: It's Laser Stories, the segment where we read weird news

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Speaker 1: stories around the globe, just like everyone else does, except

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Speaker 1: we've got a laser.

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Speaker 2: Those are the salt shakers.

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Speaker 1: Just dump this first Laser Stories out of America orrah.

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Speaker 3: You say you no one else? I'll care.

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Speaker 2: We'll wait to hear the story first.

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Speaker 1: Damiel Swinson, a Minnesota lawyer, says he was watching TV

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Speaker 1: with his family after dinner when he heard a noise

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Speaker 1: coming from the other room. But before he could get up,

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Speaker 1: his rumba came around the corner, chasing the pet cat

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Speaker 1: while yelling multiple racial slurs.

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Speaker 3: That's awful. I'm laughing for that. That's hilariously awful.

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Speaker 1: The crazy thing about this story is it's not unusual.

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Speaker 1: Owners in multiple cities are complaining about their rumbas getting

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Speaker 1: hacked by strangers who, once they get in, quickly change

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Speaker 1: the password and do horrible stuff. It happened to a

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Speaker 1: homeowner in California where the roomba began chasing his dog,

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Speaker 1: and another person in El Paso, Texas, who reported the

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Speaker 1: roomba was cursing at them in multiple languages.

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Speaker 3: Like a bilingual.

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Speaker 1: Apparently, the parent company called Ecovas, is extremely susceptible to hacking,

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Speaker 1: but they have come out and said an update patch

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Speaker 1: is coming in November, just in time for the holidays,

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Speaker 1: and after all of us already get hacked. This next

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Speaker 1: laser story is out of retail world. Bath and Bodyworks

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Speaker 1: just had to issue a public apology saying we are

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Speaker 1: very sorry about our KKK looking.

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Speaker 2: Candles US three k's there, Jeff.

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Speaker 1: I sure did ah. I'm going to show my host

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Speaker 1: the pictures of it. The store released their holiday candle

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Speaker 1: assortment recently and it came with a questionable one called

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Speaker 1: snowed In and the scent of it was fine, but

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Speaker 1: the label on the jar was not because it's supposed

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Speaker 1: to be a tiny picture of a paper cutout of

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Speaker 1: a snowflake.

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Speaker 2: Which I do see. You can see the snowflake, but

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Speaker 2: you can see the white hoods. Yeah. Fortunately nobody caught it.

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Speaker 1: It came out looking more like white hoods with cutouts

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Speaker 1: for eyes.

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Speaker 3: Part, because they're all connected because the flake.

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Speaker 1: While many people online were taken aback by the mistake,

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Speaker 1: others said it's obviously a snowflake and people are just

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Speaker 1: trying to get upset for no reason. It's probably not

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Speaker 1: gonna be something I would put on my shelf in

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Speaker 1: my house, but.

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Speaker 2: You will buy it.

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Speaker 1: No, No, I understand the mistake, but yeah, it's pretty.

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Speaker 2: Glary either way.

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Speaker 1: They removed it from all of their stores and said

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Speaker 1: we greatly apologize to anyone we've offended and are swiftly

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Speaker 1: working to have this item removed. Okay, yeah, but go

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Speaker 1: get yours at Brooks House in the basement in the

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Speaker 1: shape of the pentagram today.

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Speaker 2: Ye, bro, that's discussing this.

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Speaker 1: Next Lazer story is out of Jonesboro, Arkansas.

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Speaker 2: Story.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're not in a great spot for it. Sixty

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Speaker 1: eight year old Larry Barnett owns a car dealership called

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Speaker 1: Legend Motor Company.

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Speaker 3: Oh thank god, I thought it's going to be something bad.

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Speaker 1: Last week he but dialed a former employee just as

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Speaker 1: he was in mid conversation about him.

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Speaker 2: Stupid is a stupids.

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Speaker 1: We still love calling nowadays my parents all the time.

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Speaker 1: My mom does me and my husband what I really

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Speaker 1: and literally, every time a husband puts it in his pocket,

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Speaker 1: it calls me weird.

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Speaker 3: I haven't heard it me talking yet, but I'm waiting.

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Speaker 1: The tracking device you put on his phone. Now I

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Speaker 1: know what you're thinking. He wasn't caught putting the guy

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Speaker 1: down or making fun of him.

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Speaker 2: Oh okay, it was actually much worse.

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Speaker 1: He was attempting to hire a hit man to kill

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Speaker 1: the guy.

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Speaker 3: Just fire the guy? What kind of what all?

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Speaker 1: It's not clear why Larry hated his ex employee so

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Speaker 1: much that he wanted him dead, but as the guy

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Speaker 1: listened on the other line, he heard Larry tell the

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Speaker 1: hit man where he lived. Then he heard quote, I

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Speaker 1: don't care if you have to burn his house to

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Speaker 1: the ground with him in it. I don't care what

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Speaker 1: you have to do. Make it look like an accident.

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Speaker 3: Why when you're hiring a hit man, does everybody say

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Speaker 3: that No crap, I'm gonna make it look like he's

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Speaker 3: still yelling on the phone like I do.

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Speaker 2: Hello, Hello, you got yeah? So the guy called the cops.

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Speaker 1: They came to his house, found his gas stove had

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Speaker 1: been tampered with already, and Larry.

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Speaker 2: Was arrested for conspiracy to commit murder.

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Speaker 1: Already crazy, all because of the luck of a butt dial.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we should be thankful.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this next laser story is out of truth town.

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Speaker 3: I thought we were just there, Jeff.

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Speaker 1: There's some lies that are so common that they don't

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Speaker 1: even register when you hear them anymore. So. A Reason

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Speaker 1: survey asks people for the most common ones they either

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Speaker 1: tell themselves or they hear all the time.

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Speaker 2: Number seven, I'm only five minutes away.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, dude. If my best friend texts me that I

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Speaker 3: know that she hasn't even.

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Speaker 2: Showered yet, it's not five minutes.

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Speaker 1: It's more like fifteen or twenty or probably forty five

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Speaker 1: an hour an hour.

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Speaker 2: Number six, I don't care what other people think.

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Speaker 1: Oh, researchers say, you absolutely do.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to.

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Speaker 1: Almost everyone does to some extent, and if you don't,

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Speaker 1: you're some sort of psychopath.

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Speaker 3: It's to the extent, and it's who do you care?

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Speaker 1: You know?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Number five.

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Speaker 1: When I recommend a movie and the person says, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'll add that to my list, Oh.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not.

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Speaker 1: No, I don't.

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Speaker 3: Well, I do. When you guys suggest videos for me

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Speaker 3: to watch with my.

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Speaker 1: Dad, ninety seven percent of the time, that movie will

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Speaker 1: never be added. I don't care how many times Brooke

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Speaker 1: has endorsed it and given in a ten.

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Speaker 3: Actually just sent me a movie about crying, and I

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Speaker 3: was like, that looks sad. Like I'm sending out that

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Speaker 3: Disney Plus Films because you recommend movies and you're like,

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Speaker 3: why haven't watched it in twenty years? Yeah? It was good.

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Speaker 2: When what was that? Let me know, I'm totally gonna

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Speaker 2: add that to my list.

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Speaker 3: It's a sad one je.

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Speaker 1: Number four, most common lie that we tell I'm going

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Speaker 1: to bed early so I can wake up early every

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Speaker 1: freaking night.

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Speaker 2: Dude, it is myself impossible.

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Speaker 1: Number three, Yes, I have read and accepted the terms

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Speaker 1: in conditions like Thanksgiving turkey.

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Speaker 3: I don't think anyone has ever other than the lawyer

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Speaker 3: wrote it weird sound.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's from the movie Liar, Liar, so deep cut

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Speaker 2: on that one.

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Speaker 1: Number two, So you're moving, I'd love to come visit.

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Speaker 3: No, you wouldn't. My buddy Nick moved to Hawaii. I

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Speaker 3: visit him.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well maybe, but you're not actually gonna go.

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Speaker 1: The number one lie we hear from people or we

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Speaker 1: say it ourselves is but doesn't register, Oh, we should

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Speaker 1: totally catch up soon.

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Speaker 3: Is always there, you know.

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Speaker 2: That's what we fit about the most.

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Speaker 1: Man.

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Speaker 2: As for this guy.

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Speaker 1: After a night of leather passion, he just told this

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Speaker 1: shoe he's gonna call it tomorrow. I'm gonna call you.

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Speaker 1: That sound means Laser Shories has come to an end

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Speaker 1: for the day. We'll do it again, same time on

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Speaker 1: Monday

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Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.