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Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast,

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Speaker 1: Elvis to Represents fifteen minute Morning Show. No, got it?

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Speaker 1: All right? Uh that's switch it being closed. So many buttons.

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Speaker 1: Uh all right, Willie, okay, ready, all right, welcome to

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Speaker 1: the fifteen minute Morning Show. I'm out of breath. I

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Speaker 1: don't know why is that it? Already talk to a doctor. No,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like every time I go, I've got

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Speaker 1: something else. I have tight in syndrome. Now that's that

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Speaker 1: actual thing. Syndrome. It's when your pants are too tight

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Speaker 1: and then your legs. I well, I got it starting

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Speaker 1: from a sports and injury. So I'm slightly cooler than

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Speaker 1: you are. But when I went to the PT, he

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Speaker 1: touched my hip or whatever and I curled up like

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Speaker 1: one of those like bugs, and he goes. The good

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Speaker 1: news is, I know what you have. The bad news is,

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Speaker 1: I've really only seen it in overweight people who put

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Speaker 1: their belts too tight. You know what I have? I

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Speaker 1: have waste band fold over. You have waist band fold Oh,

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Speaker 1: I've got it syndrome. And syndrome is that's when like

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Speaker 1: the elastic I don't know if women have it. So

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Speaker 1: much happening now, especially with your boxes shorts they have

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Speaker 1: like the thick waistband. Can you sit down? If it

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Speaker 1: starts to like curve over the next size, it's time

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Speaker 1: for the next size. It means your belly's hanging over

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Speaker 1: the like what's the what's the woman equivalent? Because the

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Speaker 1: guys it's the underwear, But like for we muffn't top

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Speaker 1: the hell out of ourselves. Oh yeah, yeah, this it's

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Speaker 1: just too tight, and then you wear like a looser

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Speaker 1: top to kind of cover. The banks are bad, I

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Speaker 1: was reading space. Thanks are bad because they they lead

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Speaker 1: to that tight pants syndrome. Yeah, oh, don't take spanks

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Speaker 1: away from us. I think I need him now too.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna fit into a suit this new weekend. I

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Speaker 1: need Paris Banks looks like the student that was late

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Speaker 1: for class but stopped for Starbucks. Anyway, that was always me.

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Speaker 1: I used to stopping at donuts and walking into class

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Speaker 1: of the donut. I got ridden up a lot. But

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Speaker 1: we've got ridiculous. I mean, at least if you walked

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Speaker 1: in with nothing, I'll tell you what happened. What had

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Speaker 1: happened was I was walking from the back and I

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Speaker 1: heard Diamonds still talking her ship about not believing in dinosaurs.

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Speaker 1: So you know me skirt how to pull over and

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Speaker 1: yell at her again. But Andrew and Josh are handling it.

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Speaker 1: They have they have it handled. Yeah, that's what happened.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, sorry and my coffee. Okay, now that that's

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Speaker 1: out of the out of the way. We have a

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Speaker 1: special guest one if you want to pull that special

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Speaker 1: guest How well do you know one certain person in

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Speaker 1: this room? How long have you known one certain person

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Speaker 1: in this room? Special guest on the phone? Thirty two?

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Speaker 1: Thirty two? Well, actually thirty two years a nine months.

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Speaker 1: That's your mom. That's mom, Hi Mom, Hi you Sorry girl,

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Speaker 1: crying right now? Thank you? How I do want sorry,

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Speaker 1: but I have to do my phone. Happy birthday to you,

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Speaker 1: Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday, Darling daughters, Samantha, I

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Speaker 1: love you, Happy birthday to you. Thank you. You guys

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Speaker 1: wonder why I cry so much? Is that one thirty

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Speaker 1: second clip of my life? Not proof as to why

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Speaker 1: it's genetic? She's such a cry baby and I am too.

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Speaker 1: And you'll this will never go away. I mean, Sam

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Speaker 1: will be eighty years old and you'll still make this

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Speaker 1: phone call on this day and saying happy birthday. Right, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I will, I will, God will thank you. Like my mom,

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Speaker 1: we'll call at the time I was born to six

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Speaker 1: am sing happy birthday and then give my aging months

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Speaker 1: because she's like months old today. I think you stopped

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Speaker 1: doing that. Thanks for the great idea. Okay, well, now

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Speaker 1: let's get to the dirt. Uh. Well, let's ask let's

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Speaker 1: ask the true question Sam's mom. Where does Sam rank

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Speaker 1: in the rankings of your favorite children? Yeah, okay, I

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Speaker 1: love them all dearly. She's my favorite in the moment

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Speaker 1: until you talk to the next one, and then that

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Speaker 1: person is Okay, here's the question. When was she your

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Speaker 1: least favorite child? What did she do that You're like,

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Speaker 1: I don't even want to know you. Please answer the question, mom,

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Speaker 1: don't don't feed bullshit here? Yeah, probably when she looked

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Speaker 1: me in the eyes through the top of her eyes,

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Speaker 1: gritting her teeth and holding her fits and saying no,

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Speaker 1: I won't. I was pretty defiance. Still does that. She

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Speaker 1: still does that. Good for you, Thank you. But then

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Speaker 1: I had to start looking down at you because you're

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Speaker 1: short and I grew like the same person. But I'm

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Speaker 1: big at hard, big hard. Are you just as as hard?

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Speaker 1: When it comes to playing like board games and stuff

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Speaker 1: that she has to win. Oh, he's a cheetah. I

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Speaker 1: am not a Cheatah, I'm sorry. I'm not a cheater.

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Speaker 1: I had to learn to let them all win. Are

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Speaker 1: you kidding? Any mother will tell you that pretty bad.

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Speaker 1: I don't really play games with her. Sam's mom. Who

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Speaker 1: where does Sam get the competitiveness from you? Or your husband?

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Speaker 1: There was a time. No, it's my husband. It's my husband. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a hand that depends on what we're talking about.

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Speaker 1: I'm competitive in business. He's competitive in sports. Okay, I

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Speaker 1: got the sports one right now, because god knows, I

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Speaker 1: don't know anything about this business world. I just play

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Speaker 1: with you because you're just like really animated about it,

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Speaker 1: and it stresses me herself. During a board game, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know where you're getting from. Wow. That I was

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Speaker 1: like twelve too, So that was Is this a discussion

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Speaker 1: you have as parents? You're like, Okay, when do we

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Speaker 1: start swearing in front of her? You don't have that discussion, really,

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Speaker 1: because my mom just do it. Just said fun. For

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Speaker 1: the first time ever, we were playing cards and I

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Speaker 1: won the hand. It was seven kings or whatever. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. If you guys ever played that, and she goes, funk,

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Speaker 1: I can't believe you want I'm like Jesus, Mom, like,

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Speaker 1: I never heard you two. She finally said the F word.

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Speaker 1: My mom says. My mom said she didn't curse until

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Speaker 1: we came along. That's what she she blames up. But no,

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Speaker 1: my kids, like they know, they know not to do it.

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Speaker 1: I mean, who knows what they do with their friends,

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Speaker 1: but they know not to do it in front of me. So,

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Speaker 1: you know, as of right now, in front of them,

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Speaker 1: I do. I try. I try to be better in

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Speaker 1: front of them, but it does slip. But I don't

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Speaker 1: curse at them. It's just like, oh my own crap,

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Speaker 1: Holy shit, Spencer, did you see this? You know it's

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Speaker 1: just you guys are young. You guys are young. Back

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Speaker 1: in the day, if I cursed in front of my mother,

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Speaker 1: she would take out the soap. You know, today we

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Speaker 1: all curse at the drop of a hat. Oh shit,

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Speaker 1: I dropped that Ba's in the day, your mother would

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Speaker 1: give it to you quick. Yeah, so you didn't curse, curse, curse,

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Speaker 1: We didn't curse. I was frightened, you know what my parents, No,

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Speaker 1: you don't know if I say something my mother. Really,

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Speaker 1: you have to use that language better than that. Started

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Speaker 1: cursing in front of my parents in the last five

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Speaker 1: to ten years. Actually, yeah, I don't know why I

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Speaker 1: don't curse at them, curse, never disrespect my parents down

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Speaker 1: there after to write a passage, you know, it's like

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Speaker 1: we're adults now. It released with tension. It really does.

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Speaker 1: It really doesn't if you google it. My daughter did,

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Speaker 1: my little one, and she says, mom, cursing is good.

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Speaker 1: It makes you feel better. Mold though the baby. I'm

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Speaker 1: one of three girls, and the youngest one was the

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Speaker 1: one cursing first. And then I was like, well, she's

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Speaker 1: gonna get away with it. Fine. The one they get

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Speaker 1: away with three. Thing I broke was not too long ago.

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Speaker 1: My both of my parents got angry at me and

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Speaker 1: they both called me an asshole. But yes, this was

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Speaker 1: and like sewhere it was the last time was the

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Speaker 1: last time I went home? Yeah, what happened? No, No,

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Speaker 1: they were they had a moment. They had a moment

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Speaker 1: they were trying to was secret from my sister. That

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Speaker 1: should not have been kept from my sister. So, I mean,

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Speaker 1: you know, my sister and I were like one. So

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Speaker 1: I told her and then lost their ship. So mad?

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Speaker 1: Did you hear my mom just now in that moment

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Speaker 1: when you said why, because she's like, no, they had

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Speaker 1: a moment. And then when you said I told my sister,

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Speaker 1: Mom goes, oh, well, yeah, they're I can't believe. I'm like,

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Speaker 1: you guys raised us to be best friends and ride

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Speaker 1: for each other. I'm gonna tell her I told her, yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're real mad. But I was like, the first time

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Speaker 1: I've ever seen them on the same page, Like, this

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Speaker 1: is a moment. He brings you together at the moment. Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So Sam's mom, are we're going to see you crying

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Speaker 1: at the wedding? Oh? Yes? Oh yeah? Are you going

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Speaker 1: to actually not see you crying the wedding? Try that one?

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Speaker 1: I wish I make up. Yeah, I got a question

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Speaker 1: for you Sam's mom regarding the wedding. Actually, this is

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Speaker 1: all right. I'm being honest here because i' with a

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Speaker 1: lot of other parents being mom zilla. Is to what

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Speaker 1: extent are you taking over your daughter's wedding because you

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Speaker 1: want to impress your own guests? That is really a

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Speaker 1: funny question. You can ask that just Amantha. I'm lucky

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Speaker 1: if I get a word in Edgeway correct. But here's why. Yes, Mom,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for that. Um, I feel like

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Speaker 1: show your work is important in these situations. So the

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Speaker 1: reason I play it so close to the best, and Mom, please,

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Speaker 1: I dare you to disagree with me here is she

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Speaker 1: and I fight so intensely and I am trying to

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Speaker 1: avoid that. So she we haven't been planning much together

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Speaker 1: as an act of love and relationship preservation because we're

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Speaker 1: going to kill each other. Like when she and my

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Speaker 1: little sister were disagreeing when my little sister was getting married,

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Speaker 1: it was a better fight than what it would be

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Speaker 1: with me and my mom. Like she does your mom

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Speaker 1: have asks and wants and needs for the wedding that

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Speaker 1: she's coming to you with because of her you know,

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Speaker 1: do you really? She has with her friends. But I

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Speaker 1: didn't be hand you a list and go this is

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Speaker 1: who I want invited for me. That's what happened. When

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Speaker 1: I was like, Mom, I can't afford to invite all

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Speaker 1: these people, she was like, sweetie, we wrote you a

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Speaker 1: big check. These people were included the same thing. It's

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Speaker 1: objectively fair. I just wish I got the head count earlier.

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Speaker 1: That's all. That's the wedding ourselves. But my mom did

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Speaker 1: the same thing. She's like, uh, no, no, these guys

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Speaker 1: need to Yeah, you need to Yeah, exactly what happened.

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Speaker 1: You could be up front about it, though I was

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Speaker 1: trying to be a smartass. I'm like, oh, so this

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Speaker 1: gift you're giving me is a conditional one, and she goes, yeah, okay,

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Speaker 1: because my question would be like, Mom, we haven't seen

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Speaker 1: this person in five years, doesn't matter they have to call, Like,

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Speaker 1: it's so stupid. I don't even know what to say

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Speaker 1: to them when they're there. You know. My thing is

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Speaker 1: I would pass them in a grocery store and not

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Speaker 1: know they are. They got to be there because they

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Speaker 1: need something to me and Daddy. That's what they Thanks

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Speaker 1: for the check. That's all I keep. That's my mantra.

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Speaker 1: Every time you invite and weddings, that's the way it is.

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Speaker 1: I'll invite them to my funeral. Then is that all right?

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Speaker 1: Can we break even there? You know what she did

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Speaker 1: say the old defend mom because this has turned into

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Speaker 1: huge fights between the two of us, is the only

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Speaker 1: fight slipping through the crack. And she totally soothed my

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Speaker 1: ego with this. She goes, if the people that you

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Speaker 1: don't want to invite because you don't know them, don't

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Speaker 1: cover their plate. Your dad and I will pay extra

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Speaker 1: for their plates, waring. That shut me the hell up,

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Speaker 1: because I actually really appreciated that perspective and that she

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Speaker 1: said she friends and you don't even know it. Are

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Speaker 1: you gonna tell us how much plates are? Jack? And

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Speaker 1: if the food sucks, he gives you less. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: make sure that people are following scary around with the turn. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's actually a conversation we need to have in the room.

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Speaker 1: We need to figure out how much for giving her

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Speaker 1: because I can't give her less than steering. Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: got to figure that ship out. Call me, I'll tell you,

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Speaker 1: do not I what are you calling you? DA's mom?

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Speaker 1: I'll be d M you alright, check your d M.

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Speaker 1: Don't answer my best friends. Yes, that's Andrew. I'll tell you.

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Speaker 1: My rule is though, anyone who's flying to make the

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Speaker 1: wedding can't give me a gift because flights are expensive.

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Speaker 1: I'm driving very longer since I just want to put

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Speaker 1: I got a helicopter. I got a helicopter to fly.

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Speaker 1: I'm still not even sure I'm gonna be able to go.

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Speaker 1: It's make any because my family is doing a big

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Speaker 1: family reunion and it's Thanksgiving and it's on Friday, and

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Speaker 1: Thanksgiving it was Saturday, and you're like, okay, I can

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Speaker 1: bail out right Friday. Yeah, I just want to about

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Speaker 1: a good person. I am. I'm driving from Pittsburgh that

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Speaker 1: morning and then back after the wedding that night to

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Speaker 1: go away. But we're not making any plane. You're driving

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Speaker 1: that day that Friday. Yeah, you're not gonna get drunk.

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to drink. You could stay at my

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Speaker 1: house from that night and dare you? You're scary? What

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Speaker 1: you were going to make that bar gig to give

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Speaker 1: to Sam on her wedding day. Oh that'd be great.

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Speaker 1: Thank you so much. That's so sweet, great idea. Well,

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Speaker 1: it's it's our favorite day for Sam. She's one of

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Speaker 1: our favorites. And thank you Sam's mom for giving birth

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Speaker 1: to her thirty two years ago. Two was when I

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Speaker 1: had my first child. Oh well, we're barren in there.

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Speaker 1: We got a real empty mom in there. And Sam's mom,

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Speaker 1: thank you for not raising rent on Sam, because I

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Speaker 1: know you're you control the apartment, and thank you for

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Speaker 1: not raising her. I think you should really appreciate that.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, thanks, we get two extra people for that.

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Speaker 1: Shut up. Thanks Mom, I love you. Sorry you didn't

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Speaker 1: do the drugs with excuse me? The fifteen Minute Morning

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Speaker 1: Show