Speaker 1: With Alexia Napola and Marisa Patton, an iHeartRadio podcast. Welcome guys,
Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode of I Put and with
Speaker 1: Me Today. Co hosting is a very special friend, Dolores Catanya.
Speaker 2: I'm so excited. I always wanted to say, did I say?
Speaker 1: You said it perfectly.
Speaker 2: You want to know why, because I say it all
Speaker 2: the time when I watch you. I am actually not
Speaker 2: only a friend, but I have always been a fan.
Speaker 1: Oh thank you. I feel the same way about you.
Speaker 1: And that's actually how we met. I think we met
Speaker 1: personally because we were dming and we would talk all
Speaker 1: the time. But when we met in person, was that
Speaker 1: Teresa and Louis wedding. Yes, and we had just come up.
Speaker 1: We had just finished our season four. And by the way,
Speaker 1: there were a lot of the girls from Jersey were
Speaker 1: at Teresa's wedding, except for obviously, you know, Melissa and Joey,
Speaker 1: but all the girls were there, and all of you
Speaker 1: were so warm and affectionate and friendly. I had such
Speaker 1: a beautiful time. But of course I grow up like
Speaker 1: towards you, because it's like we liked each other. And
Speaker 1: your son Frankie was the one that came up to
Speaker 1: me and he's lovely, and I was like so flattered.
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, where's your mom. He's like, Oh,
Speaker 1: my mom's dying to see you. I'm dying to see her.
Speaker 1: And so we just had connected right there, and then
Speaker 1: Frank was there, and Frank hit it off with Todd,
Speaker 1: and you know the rest is history. You know, every
Speaker 1: time we see each other, either in New York or
Speaker 1: Bravo Con. The last time we saw each other in Vegas,
Speaker 1: you know, it was really it was really nice.
Speaker 2: Well, I don't get enough of you, to be honest,
Speaker 2: I just don't. I wish that. You know, there's like
Speaker 2: a lot of times they asked me where else would
Speaker 2: you film? And I say, I am a Jersey girl
Speaker 2: at heart. But what you don't know is I have
Speaker 2: I had a place in Florida for like fifteen years.
Speaker 2: Frank and I had a place at the Pinnacle.
Speaker 1: Oh nice sunny aisles.
Speaker 2: Yes, and you know our dream was always my dream
Speaker 2: to be a snowbird. And I might get there yet, Alexias.
Speaker 1: Yes, I want to hear. Yeah. Miami. You know, I
Speaker 1: feel like Miami is so connected with New York and
Speaker 1: New Jersey.
Speaker 2: Every day here I'm not sharing you with New York.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll take that. I actually was in Boca Raton
Speaker 1: this weekend. I mean these few days, actually into the
Speaker 1: weekend with Frankie, and there were so many people there
Speaker 1: from Jersey. I felt like everybody from Jersey Long Island,
Speaker 1: like all those places there, everybody moved here to Boca,
Speaker 1: which is actually pretty nice too.
Speaker 2: My cousin Tanya moved to Boka. I missed her so much.
Speaker 2: How is my Frankie. We love Frankie.
Speaker 1: We are thank you, thank you. He's doing great. He's
Speaker 1: doing really really well. So how do your family?
Speaker 2: Thank you? Very good my Frankie. Tomorrow we're going to
Speaker 2: Portugal with his girlfriend's family. He's in a very serious relationship.
Speaker 2: I love her.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's very private about his life, so I don't
Speaker 1: know much about his life, and I love that he
Speaker 1: keeps his personal life private, unlike us. Yeah, he did
Speaker 1: the opposite we did, which is probably smart.
Speaker 2: Yes, but he's also in a job that he is
Speaker 2: very temperamental, Like, he's very careful with his job. Frankie
Speaker 2: works at least like ninety hours a week, and I'm
Speaker 2: not even exaggerating. I saw him on the beach. He
Speaker 2: bought a chair with a hole in it and he
Speaker 2: has his computer underneath, and he puts his face through
Speaker 2: and he's on the beach with his This is on
Speaker 2: a Sunday, and he's a lovely girlfriend who puts up
Speaker 2: with that. But you know, Alexi, he'll give a good
Speaker 2: life to somebody. He's raised to be very respectful to women,
Speaker 2: and so he's very sweet, says his rosaries all the time.
Speaker 2: He's very well.
Speaker 1: I fell in love with him. I mean not only
Speaker 1: because he's so cute, Like he's as beautiful in the
Speaker 1: inside as in the outside, and he projects that. So
Speaker 1: I'm very happy for him. His girlfriend's very lucky to
Speaker 1: have him. And I'm sure she's a good one because
Speaker 1: I'm sure he picked a good one.
Speaker 2: She picked a good one. So we're having a family bag,
Speaker 2: his parents and me and Paul and her and Frankie.
Speaker 2: We're all going to Portugal together tomorrow because that's where
Speaker 2: her family's from. So I'm very excited about that. I
Speaker 2: spend a lot more time with Frankie and Gabby. I
Speaker 2: just got back from Africa with South Africa, which was
Speaker 2: a very different trip, Alexia, is it well, not the
Speaker 2: one I did, but it was very nice. So I
Speaker 2: was on the back of a pickup truck in the
Speaker 2: middle of the jungle trying to save rhinos from being poached.
Speaker 1: And we aw, is that your charity thing that you do?
Speaker 2: No, this is a conservation, No it was this is something.
Speaker 2: My daughter runs these trips and she has lovely friends.
Speaker 2: She's found such beautiful people that she works over there,
Speaker 2: and you know, sometimes they get a snare, you know,
Speaker 2: the poachers. So here I am working with a wild
Speaker 2: in the middle of the jungle.
Speaker 1: I'm so afraid of animals.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, Alexia.
Speaker 1: I think they're beautiful to look up, but I'm just
Speaker 1: a very scared of them.
Speaker 2: I had a lion staring in my face, wild lion,
Speaker 2: Oh my god. And my daughter and her friends were
Speaker 2: like crying. They're like, this is so beautiful. I'm like,
Speaker 2: let's get the got it here.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I would have like feed in my pants.
Speaker 1: I honestly, I don't think I could have done that
Speaker 1: unless there was like guards, you know, with like I
Speaker 1: don't know, protecting me. I just couldn't. Like my nerves,
Speaker 1: I just can't do that. So I give you a
Speaker 1: lot of credit. My friend because that's not the idea
Speaker 1: I had of South Africa going on an African safari.
Speaker 1: I need like a glammed one and like protection.
Speaker 2: And I was unrecognizable when I came home. But it
Speaker 2: was so funny. My skin was really good, I guess
Speaker 2: from all the dirt hitting me in the face and
Speaker 2: it was.
Speaker 1: Oh but fun. I'm happy you got to do that
Speaker 1: with your daughter, Alexia.
Speaker 2: And my mom never came to my things growing up
Speaker 2: because I didn't have things. I just worked right and
Speaker 2: my softball game that just passed my mom came to
Speaker 2: last year for the first time. Like, I don't think
Speaker 2: my parents actually understand what I do for a living.
Speaker 2: Totally help me, right, So I.
Speaker 1: Don't think we understand ourselves.
Speaker 2: No, we do, but you know what, I don't think
Speaker 2: at all we understand that half the time, so it's
Speaker 2: not understandable. So anyway, when my daughter asked me to go,
Speaker 2: I went because I wanted her to know that I'm
Speaker 2: interested in what she does, and I am. She I'm
Speaker 2: very proud of her.
Speaker 1: I love that. I love that. But like you, you know,
Speaker 1: I feel like we learned from our parents, and you know,
Speaker 1: I've also been a very involved mom because of that,
Speaker 1: because I never had you know, not that I didn't
Speaker 1: have their support, they just weren't really there physically for me,
Speaker 1: Like they didn't attend the games, Like I was always
Speaker 1: involved in everything, but they were always very busy working
Speaker 1: so that I can have like a good life. Like
Speaker 1: that's what they would say, Well, you know why I'm
Speaker 1: not there because you know, we're working so we can
Speaker 1: provide for you. Yeah, you know, our children are fortunate
Speaker 1: that we can give them both.
Speaker 2: One hundred percent. And I love that. And now they're
Speaker 2: grown up, so I'm kind of like finding you know,
Speaker 2: what's next. But they still need you. They always need you,
Speaker 2: but the way they used to it's not so much
Speaker 2: hands on. It's more of a mental thing now, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and they need to know, like you know, and
Speaker 1: I love that, you know that they need any help
Speaker 1: or they want anybody's advice, they have a question or
Speaker 1: anything that they need that on like their first phone call.
Speaker 1: They value like our opinion and how we feel about things.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, Alexia, like you, we've been through a
Speaker 2: lot as women. We've been through some things that a
Speaker 2: lot of people probably wouldn't survive a day. We've been
Speaker 2: through more than once and seen a lot, lived a lot,
Speaker 2: so we can give that advice through experience. And that's
Speaker 2: one of the things I noticed in the younger girls
Speaker 2: that follow us is they want to know what to do.
Speaker 2: They look up to us right for advice and things relationships, friendships, men,
Speaker 2: you know, being you know, where do I go, what
Speaker 2: do I do?
Speaker 1: Things like that, which is smart because that's what you want.
Speaker 1: You want women that inspire you, that have lived a life,
Speaker 1: that have had lessons and are filled with wisdom, and
Speaker 1: we're like educating them, you know in a way. They
Speaker 1: want to know how we got from like point A
Speaker 1: to point B. They want to know like about our
Speaker 1: obstacles and how we got to we're at today. So
Speaker 1: it's actually very flattering, and we even talked about that.
Speaker 1: We talked about the fact that the audience for the
Speaker 1: Housewives has become so much younger than we originally started
Speaker 1: doing this. Where it used to be you know, women
Speaker 1: our age or even older. Now today it's like you
Speaker 1: get eighteen year olds that like come up to you
Speaker 1: and they're like, oh my god, we love you. We
Speaker 1: think you're like you know, and it's truly not that
Speaker 1: they love the outside of us and what we look
Speaker 1: like in our lifestyle. But they're like us as a woman,
Speaker 1: you know, as a strong woman, as a person.
Speaker 2: That's the strength, it's the strength look for. And you know,
Speaker 2: Alexia and not everybody had a mom that they could
Speaker 2: go to, right and a lot of these girls that
Speaker 2: I speak to didn't have that. And my mom's very wise.
Speaker 2: I mean, my mom's never even graduated from high school.
Speaker 2: She left school at a very early age. And she's
Speaker 2: never even been on a vacation. But she's that's your
Speaker 2: next trip.
Speaker 1: I want you to take your mom on a trip.
Speaker 2: Shell Nope, She's like, I'm happy where I am. But
Speaker 2: she's so smart, she's and she thought she was stupid
Speaker 2: always and so dumb, but but she experienced. Also, I
Speaker 2: think life it's not all about like the superficial things
Speaker 2: to where any girl could figure that out herself.
Speaker 1: Really.
Speaker 2: But so yeah, like so we were saying, maybe are
Speaker 2: you know the housewives have turned to some some younger,
Speaker 2: but you can't have all younger and just that's my
Speaker 2: I agree.
Speaker 1: I agree with that. I think that there needs to
Speaker 1: be all different age groups. And I also find it
Speaker 1: a little strange when it's a very young girl, like
Speaker 1: maybe in her mid or late thirties, and then there's
Speaker 1: like late fifties. I mean, twenty years is a big gap,
Speaker 1: you know, and it is a big gap, and you know,
Speaker 1: and just because of that, we have so many differences.
Speaker 1: I mean, we can both maybe be moms because they
Speaker 1: already have like small children, but they really haven't experienced
Speaker 1: or gone through all the things that we've gone through.
Speaker 2: And you know, some of them, they ever experienced some
Speaker 2: of the things we've gone through.
Speaker 1: Oh one hundred percent. And there are a lot of
Speaker 1: women that are half my age that will never experience
Speaker 1: put up experience, and you know what, I'm happy for them.
Speaker 1: But I am who I am today because of my experiences,
Speaker 1: and you know, and I'm finally like proud of them
Speaker 1: because I feel like a lot of times I was
Speaker 1: ashamed of all of a lot of them. But today
Speaker 1: I am proud of them.
Speaker 2: That is a very very strong statement for me as well,
Speaker 2: because I was very like ashamed of some things. I
Speaker 2: mean I never even told the mothers at school I
Speaker 2: was divorced when my kids were younger because I was
Speaker 2: ashamed of that.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Wow, And which when you when you don't share things right.
Speaker 2: I know there's a bad part part of sharing, but
Speaker 2: the good part to sharing is to know that you're
Speaker 2: not the only person that ever went through that, and
Speaker 2: there are also people that can help you through something
Speaker 2: if you just tell them, or if you're honest or transparent.
Speaker 2: I have no other.
Speaker 1: Way to be right, Well, I feel like the show
Speaker 1: helped me a lot with that, you know, having to
Speaker 1: be honest talking about it, and I'm so real and
Speaker 1: authentic that I can't lie about anything, So it just
Speaker 1: kind of like made me feel a little bit uncomfortable
Speaker 1: in the beginning, but once I was able to do it,
Speaker 1: it's even become therapeutic, like in my own way in
Speaker 1: my personal story. I mean not with the fighting with
Speaker 1: the girls or whatever, because that's not therapeutic for anybody,
Speaker 1: but you know, as my personal story goes and with
Speaker 1: my family and all that, I think that it's helped
Speaker 1: me a lot.
Speaker 2: One hundred percent. I think I've grown. One thing. One
Speaker 2: of the things about this show is I feel like
Speaker 2: I've grown so much and gone out of my little
Speaker 2: bubble that I grew up around because growing up and
Speaker 2: I could speak for the rest of the girls too,
Speaker 2: that when they started this franchise. They didn't know that
Speaker 2: New Jersey. Everybody in the world wasn't like New Jersey
Speaker 2: really to the people we knew. It's almost like thinking
Speaker 2: everyone speaks the same language, right, we didn't know that
Speaker 2: throwing a table would be like iconic. That's like at home,
Speaker 2: like we're not offended by it, but other people are like,
Speaker 2: how could it? You know, it's kind of funny in
Speaker 2: a way.
Speaker 1: Yes, now we get it now after all of these years,
Speaker 1: if you girls on TV, we finally got it, you know.
Speaker 1: And that's the beauty of these shows that every franchise brings,
Speaker 1: you know, something different, and it's really like, you know,
Speaker 1: where the city's are, you know, who are the people?
Speaker 1: You know, kind of like the culture. You know, even
Speaker 1: Miami is so different. It's so unique from you know,
Speaker 1: the others cities and Dubai, you know, and nowadays, you know,
Speaker 1: the cast are so diverse and you know, so inclusive,
Speaker 1: you know, and that makes it really like a beautiful
Speaker 1: thing because you know, we get to see a little
Speaker 1: bit about everybody and you know we're not all the
Speaker 1: same yet you know, we all love each other and
Speaker 1: sometimes we don't, but you know that's not why we
Speaker 1: don't love each other, you know. But what I'm trying
Speaker 1: to say is that, you know, I love how these
Speaker 1: shows have taken a little bit of a direct different
Speaker 1: direction because of the times we're living, and you know,
Speaker 1: there's a little bit of everyone. I mean, I think
Speaker 1: your show is still very Jersey, yeah yeah, but Miami
Speaker 1: is very is very like diverse now, but that's really Miami.
Speaker 1: It's truly a representation of the city that we live in.
Speaker 1: I mean there's people from everywhere all over the world here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's gotten like that. I want to say,
Speaker 2: in the past what fifteen years, I've seen a big difference.
Speaker 2: It was mostly Cuban When I go back blast.
Speaker 1: Well, I want to say the Cubans still rule Miami
Speaker 1: because they were the first ones here and we built Miami.
Speaker 1: I'm going to give my Cubans the credit. But you know,
Speaker 1: after the Cubans are along with the Cubans, there's been
Speaker 1: you know, many nationalities that have helped grow the city
Speaker 1: and have all contributed to the growth and the wealth.
Speaker 2: I see that. I see that. I really missed Miami.
Speaker 2: Talking to you right now.
Speaker 1: Well, you have to come. It's a beautiful day here.
Speaker 1: It's been rainy like hell every single day, because that's
Speaker 1: Miami too. It was like start pouring and then all
Speaker 1: of a sudden the sun comes out. But you need
Speaker 1: to plan a trip. Yeah, want to see you here soon.
Speaker 1: I actually saw Frank here when he came with Brittany,
Speaker 1: I think like a year or two ago, one summer,
Speaker 1: and we went to have lunch, like a really cool
Speaker 1: spot here and.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm very nice Brittany. So they're getting married in November.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. I wonder if he's inviting Todd or me.
Speaker 1: I would love for you to be there go together.
Speaker 1: Are you going? Are you going?
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm going, of course my mom, Well my mom
Speaker 2: will go because it's too far. But you know, my dad,
Speaker 2: my brother, my sisters are going. He's his best man.
Speaker 2: Gabby's in the wedding.
Speaker 1: So I love your relationship with Frank. I've always wanted
Speaker 1: to ask you, so, how long did was it always
Speaker 1: like that once you guys separated or did it take
Speaker 1: you some time to get to where obviously where you're
Speaker 1: at today. I mean it's been years already.
Speaker 2: But so I mean sometimes I can relive twenty years ago,
Speaker 2: twenty five years ago, like it would you know, you know,
Speaker 2: forget certain things. So I never wanted to hate him,
Speaker 2: so I always kept an open, you know, communication with him,
Speaker 2: and I just I thought, in the beginning, the really
Speaker 2: truth is I wanted to spite people that you know,
Speaker 2: he left, and I was like, I'll never give him
Speaker 2: the excuse to say that that's why I left, because
Speaker 2: she's a bit. So I was even nicer when all
Speaker 2: that happened far and then it just became easy for
Speaker 2: me because I would always say, and I tell women,
Speaker 2: just be nice. They're gonna need you still, like things
Speaker 2: are gonna happen in their life. And and you know,
Speaker 2: fake it till you make it.
Speaker 1: How old were your children when you separated.
Speaker 2: I was pregnant for Frankie and Gabby was thready right, No,
Speaker 2: I mean they were small.
Speaker 1: You still knew that you were going to have to
Speaker 1: deal with him, you know, for the rest of your
Speaker 1: life pretty much.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And and he also didn't want a tumultuous divorce
Speaker 2: for the kids either, So it took two people to
Speaker 2: really and it took a lot of like not fighting
Speaker 2: over stupid shit, like a lot of people fight over,
Speaker 2: you know, a curtain. They'll go on and on about
Speaker 2: curtains and or you know, why aren't you As a mom,
Speaker 2: I could have said, oh, well, Frank, you're it's it's
Speaker 2: Tuesday at seven o'clock. Why aren't you here yet? I
Speaker 2: wasn't going anywhere, so I said, don't come at all.
Speaker 2: Who cares?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 2: We never followed a schedule. We never I never thought
Speaker 2: about because I would it would fighting and I and
Speaker 2: I try to tell my friends, is most of the
Speaker 2: fighting that happens, it's just not worth it. That ages you,
Speaker 2: like that is such an anchor.
Speaker 1: I agree, I mean, I agree, but it's hard. You
Speaker 1: have to be in the person's position. You know, everybody's
Speaker 1: relationship is different, you know, not everybody is like Frank
Speaker 1: and dolorous, you know what I mean. There's different personalities,
Speaker 1: there's different issues. It's like complicated, my friend.
Speaker 2: It takes two people to be on the same page,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 1: And sometimes it doesn't happen while you're married, but then
Speaker 1: when you're divorced, you learn from it, and you know,
Speaker 1: for the good of the children and for your own sanity,
Speaker 1: like you said, and to be happy, you just you
Speaker 1: kind of like believe, yeah, and you just you know,
Speaker 1: want piece in your life and you're like, Okay, we're good.
Speaker 2: There's no price on a piece. But did we have
Speaker 2: our fight? Oh my god, there was a few times
Speaker 2: we were going to kill you. I think we would
Speaker 2: have killed each other, like I wished him dead, like
Speaker 2: I wished horrible things. I mean that. You know, you
Speaker 2: go through so many different things til you get to
Speaker 2: the point of saying, all right, like I just need
Speaker 2: peace in my life, and I can't do that because
Speaker 2: it'll drag me down. And it's for your own self
Speaker 2: to move on from whatever issues, right, So yeah, I
Speaker 2: mean it's hard. It's not easy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, and even so, I guess when you
Speaker 1: obviously when you broke up with Frank, you weren't on
Speaker 1: TV yet, so it was a different time in your life.
Speaker 1: But having to do this publicly, oh, let's see, it
Speaker 1: makes everything worse. And that's what we're going to get
Speaker 1: into our hot topic, which is everybody's hot topic. And
Speaker 1: that's benefit they are officially done, Alexia.
Speaker 2: Do you know that from my opinion, because her and
Speaker 2: Theresa got married the same week and Theresa got more
Speaker 2: play on her wedding and more oftisement than these two did.
Speaker 2: But their breakup is viral isn't that crazy?
Speaker 1: Yes, because you know, I feel like people in general,
Speaker 1: I mean, they want to say they were rooting for them. Yes,
Speaker 1: there was a lot of people rooting for them, like
Speaker 1: myself because I'm such a j Loo fan, But there
Speaker 1: was a lot of people that were not. And I
Speaker 1: feel like the majority of the people when they see
Speaker 1: these celebrity in public couples, they're like secretly wanting them
Speaker 1: to go like through pain and you know, and divorce
Speaker 1: in this case. And it was just like the entire
Speaker 1: world for four months, that's all they've talked about and speculated.
Speaker 1: So now we know obviously that there was problems, like
Speaker 1: we all thought, but there wasn't really enough information, you know,
Speaker 1: to gather any type of thing except that you know
Speaker 1: obviously that there were two different people and they wanted
Speaker 1: different things in life, and that she was such a
Speaker 1: public person he was such a private person. That was
Speaker 1: like originally how it started four months ago and we
Speaker 1: knew there was trouble in paradise, But now months later
Speaker 1: there's all this information, So now I'm like, uh huh, well, what.
Speaker 2: Is the information like? Because you know, I love it
Speaker 2: when somebody gets together with somebody and then all of
Speaker 2: a sudden when they want to break up, they use like, oh,
Speaker 2: your life is too public as an excuse.
Speaker 1: She's Bingo bingo exactly. And by the way, you knew
Speaker 1: who she was twenty years ago. She wasn't even as
Speaker 1: famous as she is today. And that broke you up
Speaker 1: twenty years ago. What do you think is going to
Speaker 1: happen now, twenty years later when she's j Lo and
Speaker 1: even like to a different power and you loved everything
Speaker 1: about her. This is how what you fell in love on,
Speaker 1: why you were talking to her again, It's how you
Speaker 1: have thoughts. I feel like hundred percent it's a false narrative.
Speaker 1: It's a false narrative that Ben Affleck is creating. And
Speaker 1: I always knew it. And you have to give things
Speaker 1: and people time.
Speaker 2: I think you're very wise, and I'm going to tell
Speaker 2: you I want to hear Europe and yes interested.
Speaker 1: Well, first of all, can I just thank you for
Speaker 1: being here today because if my other co host, Marisol,
Speaker 1: I'm going to call you in to substitute for Marisol
Speaker 1: when she doesn't feel like talking about the topics that
Speaker 1: I love. One of them was this because she doesn't
Speaker 1: like j Loo. So every time you know, and obviously
Speaker 1: we've been doing a podcast throughout the summer, and every
Speaker 1: week there's an article about Jlo and Ben and I
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about it, and she would be like, no,
Speaker 1: we're not talking about Jalo. So when this happened now
Speaker 1: and she's not here, I'm like, yes, I know, Dolores,
Speaker 1: my girls just gonna want to talk about this.
Speaker 2: All over this, I was just like scrolling through reading
Speaker 2: the articles.
Speaker 1: I mean, he's done her dirty, let me tell you,
Speaker 1: because I mean the fact that he was trying to
Speaker 1: he was trying to create his narrative, and it turns
Speaker 1: out that it's a false narrative because he was very
Speaker 1: much involved in the docuseries, which by the way, his
Speaker 1: production company produced it, Artist Equity, and he knew about everything.
Speaker 1: He knew about the love Letter. So she was putting
Speaker 1: about the whole talky series he participated, Yeah, he participated
Speaker 1: in it.
Speaker 2: Can I just make a statement like I could be wrong.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying that he's growing around. I'm not saying
Speaker 2: that I don't know what's going on. They could have
Speaker 2: fell out a lot. I don't know. But all I
Speaker 2: can say is whenever my friends call me and all
Speaker 2: of a sudden, they hate their husbands for things that
Speaker 2: the guy's been doing for like twenty years. Like I'm like,
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, this bothers you so much that
Speaker 2: you want to get divorced. Oh and you're at the
Speaker 2: gym three or four more days a week. Oh uh,
Speaker 2: stop banging your trainer.
Speaker 1: Exactly. And that's what I'm saying. I get it. I
Speaker 1: knew exactly where you were going because I think the
Speaker 1: same thing. And in this case, he just did it
Speaker 1: really good to her, because in this case, he always
Speaker 1: thought that everybody was going to support him and she
Speaker 1: was going to be the villain, and everybody was going
Speaker 1: to say, you know, vn'sbury private and you know, he
Speaker 1: wants to live his life with his kids, and he's
Speaker 1: very simple, and he was married to Jennifer Gardner like
Speaker 1: and now this yeah, and this woman like him to
Speaker 1: ruin his life, you know. And of course all the
Speaker 1: women their haters, and they're all going to say the
Speaker 1: same thing. And then on top of it, this is
Speaker 1: her fourth marriage. So I was like, this poor woman,
Speaker 1: they're gonna say she's definitely the problem, which they have said.
Speaker 1: Now the narrative can do a little bit.
Speaker 2: Oh, everybody's why are women turned tearing women down all
Speaker 2: the time?
Speaker 1: Thank you? Thank you? Like I was like, and that's yeah,
Speaker 1: And that's what I would like to all these women
Speaker 1: because they do the same thing.
Speaker 2: She's got it. She's inviscerated her her concerts are doing shit.
Speaker 2: She's been walking around like unhappy for so long. She's
Speaker 2: forgotten who she is.
Speaker 1: I feel like she has. I think that she was
Speaker 1: trying to fix someth so much and being with a
Speaker 1: person like this, with erotic mood swings, with kis and lows.
Speaker 1: One day's good, one day's bad. One day he's happy
Speaker 1: and he's to you, and another day he's you know,
Speaker 1: he's an asshole, and like, yeah, it's it's torture. It
Speaker 1: is it's a mind He not like that.
Speaker 2: It's a mind. Fuck. You're walking on eggshells all the time,
Speaker 2: and it drained you. And I feel like this relation
Speaker 2: had ship has taken its toll on her career.
Speaker 1: I think so, And why would he want to do
Speaker 1: that to her? I mean if and I really want
Speaker 1: to believe that there's so much love between them, because
Speaker 1: you know, I've always said to myself, the only reason
Speaker 1: why a lot of people make stupid decisions is because
Speaker 1: of love, because you're so in love and yeah and
Speaker 1: for real, and I really did think. I mean, they're
Speaker 1: both in love with the idea of love. So I
Speaker 1: think that when they re killed the relationship, it had
Speaker 1: a lot to do with that because they were kind
Speaker 1: of both in a bad place. You know, she was
Speaker 1: just breaking up with her fiance that she did on
Speaker 1: her supposedly or not. But yeah, yeah, that was not good.
Speaker 1: So she was kind of like an aloe. And I
Speaker 1: think that men like that come into your life at
Speaker 1: a time when you're low and you're vulnerable, and you know,
Speaker 1: she always had that was kind of like the guy
Speaker 1: that escaped twenty years ago. So now she has this,
Speaker 1: you know, opportunity again twenty years later to you know,
Speaker 1: be with the love of her life that she always
Speaker 1: thought that was the love of her life. And they
Speaker 1: just rekindled and it was perfect to the point that
Speaker 1: they don't even have a prenup. I mean, talk about insanity.
Speaker 1: I mean, two major stars like them, with the kind
Speaker 1: of money that they have, you just make stupid mistakes
Speaker 1: when you're like in love like that.
Speaker 2: I've never made a good decision when I was vulnerable.
Speaker 2: It's weird because when your energy is like that, you
Speaker 2: do not meet the right person and then you get
Speaker 2: in the wrong hands.
Speaker 1: I agree, and that's what she needs to learn, because
Speaker 1: I feel like she's really not the problem in the
Speaker 1: sense that just because she's been married four times and
Speaker 1: you know, going for her fourths divorce, I think she
Speaker 1: just picks the wrong men because she's in love with
Speaker 1: the idea of being in love, and she falls in
Speaker 1: love very easily before I got on here.
Speaker 2: She's in love with the idea, but she.
Speaker 1: Falls in love. But they're all been different. All her
Speaker 1: men have been different, So it's not like she has
Speaker 1: like a pattern, you know, her four relationships or marriages,
Speaker 1: because she's had more than four. She's had four marriages,
Speaker 1: but I think like six engagement rings, and she's been
Speaker 1: you know, always pretty much always in a relationship. But
Speaker 1: she's looking for that love and that happiness. I feel
Speaker 1: like a lot of women have that, you know. But
Speaker 1: the fact that this to her is ending and she
Speaker 1: was really in love with this man is just heartbreaking
Speaker 1: for me. I honestly feel really bad for he because
Speaker 1: I know how much she loves this man, like because
Speaker 1: if not she wouldn't have put up with all the
Speaker 1: stuff that she's put up with.
Speaker 2: I think that also, because she's so into being in love,
Speaker 2: she puts up with a lot of things more than
Speaker 2: she should. I mean, we've all done this right. She
Speaker 2: she likes to be an achiever. She likes to do
Speaker 2: everything one hundred percent. And that's what she put into
Speaker 2: this relationship. Like even though in and then you get
Speaker 2: to a certain age, we're fifties, we're in our fifties.
Speaker 1: I know you think she wanted I mean, she thought
Speaker 1: she was going to be married forever. He engraved in
Speaker 1: her ring, I'm not going anywhere, and then he sends
Speaker 1: you know, the whole relationship started off so beautiful, like
Speaker 1: he loved Bombderr with all these letters, you know, and
Speaker 1: then all of a sudden, it's kind of like it's over,
Speaker 1: and I feel like she's been doing the work. Or
Speaker 1: she even canceled her concert. Yes, the ticket sales were low,
Speaker 1: but you know what, she would have gone through it
Speaker 1: because she's that person, like you said, and achiever. She
Speaker 1: would have shown up to all her concerts. She would
Speaker 1: have made them better than ever. So then her next
Speaker 1: tour would have been even better. So She's an overachiever
Speaker 1: when it comes to her work and her professional life.
Speaker 1: And I'm just so sad that she's struggled so much
Speaker 1: on her personal life because she has children. You know,
Speaker 1: I feel like you could get married and divorce. How
Speaker 1: many times do you want when there's no children involved?
Speaker 1: But you know, sometimes when you have children, it really
Speaker 1: does affect the children.
Speaker 2: The little ones, the little one separately. Hey, listen, I
Speaker 2: will say that. You know, my son said to me
Speaker 2: the other day, he said, MA, what would you have
Speaker 2: done different? Am I the man that you? You know?
Speaker 2: You did? I grow up to be the man that
Speaker 2: you're proud of? And I said, of course you are.
Speaker 2: You're I raised you to be the man that I
Speaker 2: would want. And he said, what would you have done different?
Speaker 2: And I said, well, there were times like I was
Speaker 2: probably frustrated or it was harder on you and Gabby
Speaker 2: than I should have been. And he said, but you
Speaker 2: were always going through so much, like you always had
Speaker 2: so much on your plate that you can't blame yourself
Speaker 2: for those things. You handled them? Well, I wouldn't, She said,
Speaker 2: you know, the hard times made me stronger in life.
Speaker 2: But he said, you know, and as women, right or
Speaker 2: even as humans, men and women, like the kids get
Speaker 2: the brunt of a lot of things. And you're right
Speaker 2: about that.
Speaker 1: And you can see it like you can see it
Speaker 1: in her children. You can see it in Ben Affleck's
Speaker 1: children as well. And that's where I have a problem.
Speaker 1: And even with the fact that she's so into like
Speaker 1: love and family and that's the first thing she does,
Speaker 1: because it's so important for her to blend a family,
Speaker 1: and she does that, and you can see that she's
Speaker 1: like striving for that, and she made Ben like a
Speaker 1: family man and like a better man and a better
Speaker 1: father to his own kids. And then now they're saying,
Speaker 1: you know, sources are saying, which by the way, we
Speaker 1: know it's like her camp. And at this point, you
Speaker 1: know what good for her. I'm happy that her camp
Speaker 1: is talking.
Speaker 2: They're tired of her getting shit on exactly.
Speaker 1: They're like, what are you talking about, Like you haven't
Speaker 1: seen my kids or you know, in four months. So yes,
Speaker 1: he's like parading. Obviously his kids are more important. But
Speaker 1: at that point, like what she wished him a happy
Speaker 1: Father's day, our hero like and she's always like praised
Speaker 1: about what a good father Ben is. And now since
Speaker 1: they got separated. He hasn't seen any of her kids,
Speaker 1: and she has kept in touch, you know, with his kids.
Speaker 2: You know what, she's better off because he is he
Speaker 2: is not good for her. I'm not putting him down.
Speaker 2: I have nothing to say bad about him. I never
Speaker 2: and him personally, but from what I see, whatever he is,
Speaker 2: he's not for her. And that's it.
Speaker 1: I don't think so. And I think it's it took
Speaker 1: her these four months of being separated, you know, her
Speaker 1: being in the Hampton's and in Italy and just having
Speaker 1: alone time and him being back in LA and just
Speaker 1: being separate and having that distance to realize, like, he's
Speaker 1: not going to change. And you can't fix people. You
Speaker 1: can't fix people.
Speaker 2: And don't change.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you, well, women don't change either. I
Speaker 1: mean I feel like what women I think a different
Speaker 1: and I know a lot of guys are going to
Speaker 1: hate me for that, or maybe even some women. Is
Speaker 1: the fact that I don't think we give up so
Speaker 1: quickly in our marriages or in our relationships, you know,
Speaker 1: especially when we love so hard. You know we'll keep
Speaker 1: on wanting to like fix it. And I mean I
Speaker 1: don't know her personally, but you know I read her
Speaker 1: book True Love when she was going through the separation
Speaker 1: with Mark Anthony, and I've always followed her. I always
Speaker 1: read like all her interviews. I'm actually, you know, to me,
Speaker 1: she's been inspiring in many ways, and I have a
Speaker 1: lot of love and respect for her, even though I
Speaker 1: don't know her personally. But this has really like affected
Speaker 1: me because I was really hoping for her that she
Speaker 1: was going to be this was it. This was like
Speaker 1: the guy that she was going to be, you know,
Speaker 1: live the rest of her life with that she wanted.
Speaker 2: God, it's not Alexia, Thank God, it's not because he's
Speaker 2: not for her. He's a mope. He's always miserable. Even
Speaker 2: when I saw them at the awards together, right and
Speaker 2: she was sitting there and she was trying. Now, I've
Speaker 2: been there before. I had been the girl who was
Speaker 2: sitting with the guy who's being miserable, and you got
Speaker 2: to like try to hope that, you know, you can
Speaker 2: keep it together because you can't pick a fight in
Speaker 2: front of a thousand people and you're just trying to, like,
Speaker 2: you know, it doesn't matter if.
Speaker 1: You're it's hard. Yeah, it's hard.
Speaker 2: We all go through the same thing in relationships. And
Speaker 2: sometimes it's like you can't.
Speaker 1: Even hide it, because there's some guys that can hide it.
Speaker 1: There's some guys that will fake it, and they'll go
Speaker 1: out in public and pretend everything's good, and then you
Speaker 1: get in the car or at home and it's like
Speaker 1: a different person. Yeah, what you guys saw there is
Speaker 1: not the real one. Right.
Speaker 2: It's a long night.
Speaker 1: And I feel like she fell in love with like
Speaker 1: a fictional character, Like in her mind, it was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I want Ben to be like all this stuff, and
Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of women do that. We're
Speaker 1: all guilty of that, and you know, we're so like,
Speaker 1: you know, excited and love of the idea of like
Speaker 1: this is the guy that I want him to be,
Speaker 1: especially because obviously all those love letters and you know,
Speaker 1: the romance scene, Yeah, love mommy. I mean, I feel
Speaker 1: like he has a lot of narcissistic characters Between you
Speaker 1: and I, he's.
Speaker 2: Got a lot of demons. But he I don't know
Speaker 2: who's good for him to be honest, right, No.
Speaker 1: He's never going to be happy, Dolores. No woman is
Speaker 1: gonna be like, no woman is good enough, and he's
Speaker 1: always going to find some kind of fault or flaw
Speaker 1: in the women because that's what that's what he's done.
Speaker 1: I mean, Jennifer Gardner could have been like a better woman.
Speaker 1: I mean she's still there. She's still there babysitting him,
Speaker 1: you know, and taking care of him.
Speaker 2: And she's like, you know, like she's normal. So you know,
Speaker 2: he's he's just not for either one of them. But yet,
Speaker 2: look at who he wound up with. Two women, two
Speaker 2: successful women to like for the most part, right, like
Speaker 2: normal women. They're not crazy. You don't see all this.
Speaker 1: Like because normal women fall in love with crazy men,
Speaker 1: and men'll be psychologically.
Speaker 2: We have to stop those things and vice versa too, Alexi.
Speaker 2: Yet I know a lot of nice guys who just
Speaker 2: fall for oh you got to yeah, crazy. But I
Speaker 2: think when you're vulnerable, like I said, you're you attract
Speaker 2: there's a reason you attract these these people. I'm not
Speaker 2: sure what it is yet, but it's not a peaceful life.
Speaker 1: Jennifer Lopez has filed for divorce from Ben Affleck, and
Speaker 1: she requested her name to change to be changed back
Speaker 1: to Jennifer lin Low rather than Jennifer Lynn Affleck. How
Speaker 1: do you feel about that about changing the name.
Speaker 2: She shouldn't have changed it in the first place. But
Speaker 2: I don't think there's anything wrong with that. However, Well,
Speaker 2: she's very traditional and romantic, and that is why she's
Speaker 2: in the position she's No.
Speaker 1: I know that's I relate to her because I'm like
Speaker 1: that too. I think that that's why I have I
Speaker 1: get it.
Speaker 2: She wanted that nuclear family, then don't pick ben Affleck,
Speaker 2: who who has all these issues.
Speaker 1: That is true, she picks the wrong men. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: why she's had four.
Speaker 2: We all long for that normal family since we're little girls.
Speaker 2: We long for that normal family. We dream about it,
Speaker 2: we play it, we do other But you know, if
Speaker 2: you pick the wrong person, it ruins your plans for yourself.
Speaker 2: And that's it. Yeah, I mean, he's all his stuff
Speaker 2: that I'm reading is all basically real bullshit about how
Speaker 2: they had differences in their idea and their lifestyle.
Speaker 1: Their lifestyle. Yeah, he's private and she's public, and she
Speaker 1: wants to go out with her friends and have fun
Speaker 1: and be social and social and advertise their love on
Speaker 1: social media and he doesn't. Well, why are you even
Speaker 1: hitting on like Robert Kennedy's daughter. I mean, I mean,
Speaker 1: if you really don't want that you pick like a
Speaker 1: plain Jane girl. But like everybody's gone out with. He
Speaker 1: went out with Anati Adamos, which is a Cuban actress, beautiful,
Speaker 1: and he used to get photographs all the time with her.
Speaker 1: Then he went out with the producer of Saturday Night Live,
Speaker 1: one of those women that produces the show, and he
Speaker 1: also got photographs with her. He used to get photographs
Speaker 1: with Jennifer Garner. Of course, with j Lo has been
Speaker 1: over the top and more than anything, because she's a
Speaker 1: star just like him. But I think what bothers him
Speaker 1: is that her star shines brighter than his, and he
Speaker 1: can do he just.
Speaker 2: Took the words out of my mouth. Like. So he
Speaker 2: goes with these very famous women and then all of
Speaker 2: a sudden he wants them to think that there's a
Speaker 2: problem with them. Do you see the pattern, Like I
Speaker 2: don't want to be with you because of your fame.
Speaker 2: For he goes with them knowing what they are, but
Speaker 2: then he gets he makes them feel bad about what
Speaker 2: they've made of themselves, like they've done something so magnanimous
Speaker 2: with their lives, like it's like a gift from God.
Speaker 2: It's like catching lightning in a bottle and he they
Speaker 2: should have somebody telling them every day, look at what
Speaker 2: you've become, look where you've come from. Instead, you got
Speaker 2: him saying I don't want I don't want this because
Speaker 2: that's just what you are. But you met me like.
Speaker 1: This, And when did that change? Because in February he
Speaker 1: was like promoting the docu series and he was part
Speaker 1: of it, and again he even had editing rights. So
Speaker 1: at this point I feel like he sat there, he
Speaker 1: did all that, and then he gave a false narrative,
Speaker 1: which is like, oh, you know, you know, I'm not
Speaker 1: really okay. I'm really uncomfortable that Jennifer, you know, shared
Speaker 1: all of our love letters. But by the way, you
Speaker 1: produced it and you had editing rights like you, I
Speaker 1: don't have that any rights, but he does.
Speaker 2: I know what that's like to not want something in
Speaker 2: there and not be able to get it out exactly.
Speaker 2: But he absolutely did not have to keep that in there.
Speaker 1: So now he did that on purpose, my friend, I
Speaker 1: feel like he said that narrative because he wanted everybody
Speaker 1: to believe that because he already had everything like set
Speaker 1: up and plans like I'm going to divorce this film.
Speaker 2: And not everybody understands that that's why she's getting a
Speaker 2: lot of flat That's why a lot of women are
Speaker 2: being like, why did you do that to him, not
Speaker 2: realizing that he's the one that actually not only allowed
Speaker 2: it to happen, but probably suggested it because he was
Speaker 2: in charge.
Speaker 1: Yes, and he also has they have this movie coming
Speaker 1: up that they're going to be in Toronto that apparently
Speaker 1: Matt Damon's going because Matt Damon's's partner in the production company,
Speaker 1: so he produced the movie as well. But the other night, Yeah,
Speaker 1: well he's very close with Yes, Yeah, they're very close.
Speaker 1: And but look, Matt Damon's won that's had a very
Speaker 1: private life, you know. Yeah, and he's married to a
Speaker 1: simple girl that, by the way, has been married over
Speaker 1: nineteen years and he never gets photographed because nobody cares,
Speaker 1: and they do, you know, And there's ways you know that, DOLORESA.
Speaker 1: If you want to be private, I don't care who
Speaker 1: you are, You're going to be private.
Speaker 3: There's many many people he didn't have to show up
Speaker 3: to these things with her, stay home, right, Like if
Speaker 3: I had someone with me that did not want that,
Speaker 3: I would say, not a problem.
Speaker 2: I'm not forcing you to come. You don't have to
Speaker 2: show up, but don't hold me back from going. And
Speaker 2: I'm okay to go by myself. So you know, there
Speaker 2: could have been a compromise. If this was the problem,
Speaker 2: he could have gone to some things, not all things.
Speaker 1: I think so too. I think that she really tried.
Speaker 1: I think that, you know, maybe I can't say the
Speaker 1: same of her other marriages, and you know, she's always
Speaker 1: been the one that's wanted out because you know that
Speaker 1: happens too. But I really do believe in my heart
Speaker 1: she's very in love with him, and she fought till
Speaker 1: the end to keep it alive, but he didn't put
Speaker 1: in the work and he didn't want it. I mean,
Speaker 1: she's saying it, you know. I mean, obviously they haven't
Speaker 1: made a public statement together or she hasn't been interviewed yet.
Speaker 1: I'm just waiting for her book because I just have
Speaker 1: a feeling that she's going to write one of those
Speaker 1: other books that also are going to be very like
Speaker 1: self reflective about her, especially after doing the docu series,
Speaker 1: as she opened up and she was so vulnerable, and
Speaker 1: you know, we got to see a different side of
Speaker 1: j Loo because a lot of times the truth is
Speaker 1: that we just got to see that side of her,
Speaker 1: of her being her professional life and just being a
Speaker 1: superstar and performing, and we really got to see more
Speaker 1: of her and who she is and her life.
Speaker 2: There's something called generational trauma, which I'm just learning about,
Speaker 2: and it's when the things in your family that have
Speaker 2: been in your family carry over to you until you
Speaker 2: heal it. I think that she needs to take some
Speaker 2: time to even though she's Jilo. You know, she's been
Speaker 2: running forever and doing all these things and becoming super famous,
Speaker 2: and maybe she just needs to come into herself, be
Speaker 2: secluded for a little bit and just be like find
Speaker 2: herself and then make a different choice on who she's with.
Speaker 1: One hundred percent, she needs to heal because she moves
Speaker 1: from one to the other, and you know, we always
Speaker 1: think that that's going to resolve the problem, and it
Speaker 1: just makes it worse because we picked the wrong partner.
Speaker 2: I think she's done so much with her life except
Speaker 2: taking healing herself, because from what I see, she grows
Speaker 2: in every aspect in her life, but her personal relationships.
Speaker 1: You know, life isn't perfect. You know. I feel like
Speaker 1: a lot of women that are so successful in their
Speaker 1: professional life sometimes you know, their personal life, and their
Speaker 1: emotional life is lacking because they're so concentrated and if
Speaker 1: you know, they work so hard at the other that
Speaker 1: they don't really like to focus or you know, some people.
Speaker 1: Maybe she has a problem where she doesn't want to
Speaker 1: like kind of do that self search and healing and
Speaker 1: you know, I mean, I don't know. I think that
Speaker 1: the docuseries kind of made her seem that she was
Speaker 1: doing that work and that's why she was better. But
Speaker 1: I don't know it's gonna I don't think that she's
Speaker 1: gonna move on so quickly after this one. You know,
Speaker 1: there's always one.
Speaker 2: That she doesn't Maybe it's good that right now things
Speaker 2: are a little bit slowing down for us. She canceled
Speaker 2: her tour.
Speaker 1: I feel like she made a lot of sacrifices for
Speaker 1: this guy, and this is like, you know, how he
Speaker 1: paid her, and.
Speaker 2: What's this one he's running around with now?
Speaker 1: So I mean apparently, you know, his camp is obviously
Speaker 1: denying the allegations and saying that they don't even know
Speaker 1: each other. But there's other people or whoever saw them,
Speaker 1: like at the Polo lage.
Speaker 2: Where did it come from? Did it come out of?
Speaker 1: Well, apparently he had a fling with her right before
Speaker 1: he got back together with j Lo. Oh okay, so
Speaker 1: they do know each other, but he thought that she
Speaker 1: was too young and she wasn't like ready for anything.
Speaker 1: By the way, she's thirty six. She looks very young though.
Speaker 1: Did you find her young looking? Yeah, very young looking,
Speaker 1: but very like plain Jane or whatever, like I don't know,
Speaker 1: like kind of like Jennifer Gardner, but like a younger
Speaker 1: version of her.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But anyways, you know, it's kind of like her
Speaker 1: celebrity crush. You know, she obviously you know, grew up
Speaker 1: watching him and whatnot. And you know, he does own
Speaker 1: a production company. He's always casting his director, so of course,
Speaker 1: like whoever is going to be you know, entertaining this,
Speaker 1: you know, they don't care about all his like you know,
Speaker 1: mental struggles right right, Well, you know at this point
Speaker 1: he's denying it, so we don't know. But you know, again,
Speaker 1: like I say, just give it time.
Speaker 2: Jlowe and him denied being together when they were together,
Speaker 2: and then denied.
Speaker 1: Being separated when they were separated. That's what they do.
Speaker 2: And then next thing, you know, yeah, so listen, if
Speaker 2: if it's not that person, it'll be somebody else. Because
Speaker 2: he's another one that can't be alone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, he'll ifine you move on to his next supply.
Speaker 1: And I think he's already working on it and it's
Speaker 1: got a crown on. Yeah. Well now he's smiling. Now
Speaker 1: he's smiling. I'm like, he's so cynical that with her,
Speaker 1: like to prove a point. He was always like with
Speaker 1: that poopy face and always mad and angry, and now
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, I'm really look at me. I'm like smiling,
Speaker 1: I'm so happy. I'm like, you're such a cycle. He's
Speaker 1: such a cycle, this guy.
Speaker 2: I can't because you know what, then she's saying in
Speaker 2: her she's probably it's even so much worse when he's
Speaker 2: going around like that, because then she's saying, oh, the
Speaker 2: next person's going to get the better version of him.
Speaker 1: J LO with there's no better version changing and there's
Speaker 1: no better version of him. They'll do the same thing
Speaker 1: to them. So think he's the great write her love
Speaker 1: letters to love bumb her.
Speaker 2: Write the love letters, and she's going to be walking
Speaker 2: around with a pit in her stomach, just like you
Speaker 2: did for the past few years.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 2: Nobody's getting a better version.
Speaker 1: No, So I'm curious, Dolores, So you know how you
Speaker 1: because you know you've been through this too and me
Speaker 1: and whatnot? How long do you think is like a
Speaker 1: fair amount of time to give your partner or the
Speaker 1: other person to kind of or to give yourselves as
Speaker 1: a couple before you're ready to make that decision, Like
Speaker 1: do you think that there were four months? Five months?
Speaker 1: Do you think that's too much? Like I feel like
Speaker 1: it's a danger zone between you and I after a
Speaker 1: certain amount of months, you know, unless there's communication and
Speaker 1: unless you're really really trying. But I felt like she
Speaker 1: he not showing up at her birthday, he not, you know,
Speaker 1: really like cutting ties with her.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he get checked out a long time ago. But
Speaker 2: everybody's different, So it's all relative, right, as long as
Speaker 2: there's no domestic violence in something. If there's domestic violence
Speaker 2: in a relationship, then it has to go away. You
Speaker 2: cannot live like that. That has to there's no fixing that,
Speaker 2: there's no sticking around for that. But if it's just
Speaker 2: like all this emotional turmoil, which is also very taxing
Speaker 2: on you as a person. And I remember me, I
Speaker 2: had to make a very big decision in my life
Speaker 2: with two small children and no education and no way
Speaker 2: to support myself. You have to say look in the
Speaker 2: mirror and say throw up your hands and say I've
Speaker 2: tried everything. I can sleep at night knowing that this
Speaker 2: is the right thing for me. And when you come
Speaker 2: to that realization and you say to yourself nothing, being
Speaker 2: without this person is not going to be worse than
Speaker 2: being with them, then you it's time to go. Your body,
Speaker 2: your heart, and your mind has to be ready. After
Speaker 2: you feel like you've tried everything, you can never leave
Speaker 2: with a regret, because then, like j Lo, you go
Speaker 2: back and you get yourself in traw Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean I think that in their case it was
Speaker 1: different circumstances. Twenty years ago. You know, they were younger
Speaker 1: and naive, they didn't know how to handle it. You know,
Speaker 1: there were more like emotionally immature, and maybe you know,
Speaker 1: twenty years later she thought they were both had some
Speaker 1: growth and there were more emotionally mature.
Speaker 2: A lexia growth out of rehabs. I've seen him like shit.
Speaker 1: I mean, I just know I listened. I'm not supporting
Speaker 1: him at all. I feel just like you, I feel
Speaker 1: like there was zero growth. But that's why I'm saying
Speaker 1: that it was like a fictional character. She it was
Speaker 1: somebody that she thought in her head was going to be,
Speaker 1: and then she woke up one day and it wasn't
Speaker 1: Prince Charming. Her fairy tale ending wasn't what she wanted
Speaker 1: it to be because the man she married and the
Speaker 1: man she left were two different people.
Speaker 2: I mean, thought of him was better than the reality,
Speaker 2: plain and simple, and that's that is true, you know,
Speaker 2: And I feel like that happens, you know, to a
Speaker 2: lot of people.
Speaker 1: But I think it's just like you know, like you said,
Speaker 1: within yourself, when it's time to go, and like you said, yeah.
Speaker 2: You've done every single thing, no matter how hard it is.
Speaker 2: When you can't take it anymore, and when that spark
Speaker 2: is gone, it's not coming back anyway.
Speaker 1: Really, So I felt that he was humiliating her throughout
Speaker 1: the entire process. He went and he moved out when
Speaker 1: she wasn't there, He moved out of the house. Then
Speaker 1: he bought a twenty million dollar house on the day
Speaker 1: of her birthday. I mean, he did so many things
Speaker 1: to stick it to her that I am surprised that
Speaker 1: she stuck around for so many months.
Speaker 2: And that that's what I mean, Like when she was
Speaker 2: good and ready. And I've said this to my friends,
Speaker 2: when you're good and ready, I will support that decision.
Speaker 2: If you love him, I love him. If you hate him,
Speaker 2: I hate him, I love that. Tomorrow I'm behind you,
Speaker 2: and I will give him the respect of your love.
Speaker 2: I don't have to internally like this person, But you know,
Speaker 2: I think that she had also the thing of like
Speaker 2: what are people going to say? What are people going
Speaker 2: to think? The other thing about making this about all
Speaker 2: this break happened and it's time to do something. Is
Speaker 2: you have to let go of what you think people
Speaker 2: will say about you or what they will think.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you have to shut It's funny that you
Speaker 1: say that, because I say the same thing. You have
Speaker 1: to shut the world down, like you have to shut
Speaker 1: down all the noise. You can't listen to anybody or anything,
Speaker 1: because everybody will drive you crazy. This is the time
Speaker 1: that you need to have the most clarity in your
Speaker 1: life and just be like, I'm not talking to anybody,
Speaker 1: sticking to what I need to find out about myself.
Speaker 1: And I think she's been doing that. And I also
Speaker 1: read an article that her mom was Ben Alfleck's biggest
Speaker 1: supporter and cheerleader, and she was, you know, giving her
Speaker 1: good advice, you know, as far as to you know,
Speaker 1: try and make things work out. And that's what Jennifer
Speaker 1: always wanted. But until now, and then now her mother
Speaker 1: is like, you know what, you need to file for divorce,
Speaker 1: and not only that, you need to start talking and
Speaker 1: you need to start telling people who this man was.
Speaker 2: For her mother to have supported him, he was probably choosing.
Speaker 1: The mother one hundred percent. Well, they had the gambling
Speaker 1: thing in common, so they like to gamble. And then
Speaker 1: I think he put her like in some commercial or something,
Speaker 1: some kind of things like that. But these guys usually
Speaker 1: are like that, They're like schmoozers, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: They're very careful.
Speaker 1: And then the mom was the one that pushed and
Speaker 1: loved the idea of her getting back with Ben.
Speaker 2: And he could be a big reason. Listen, when my
Speaker 2: mother tells me something, I listen. You know that that
Speaker 2: validation from your mother goes a very very long way.
Speaker 1: And you know, and moms always know, they have like
Speaker 1: the sixth scent, like.
Speaker 2: They know, you know, moms could be fool too.
Speaker 1: Well in the beginning, you know, I think in the beginning,
Speaker 1: you know, there's going to be people always that are
Speaker 1: rooting for you and they love it and they see
Speaker 1: you happy, and you know, and I feel like she
Speaker 1: was making him better, you know, she was kind of
Speaker 1: like lying about things or keeping things inside when like
Speaker 1: her manager didn't like him, a lot of her friends,
Speaker 1: and he was kind of like isolating her from all
Speaker 1: the people she was close to, which is another sign.
Speaker 2: I never I never seen them as together. I never
Speaker 2: seen it. Never one day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, not twenty years ago. Yeah, not on their They
Speaker 1: always kind of looked like they were against each other. Like,
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't think she but I think kind
Speaker 1: of like him. Yeah, I mean to me, he's just
Speaker 1: not like mentally well, because I mean, that's not what
Speaker 1: you get married for. That's not what you're in a
Speaker 1: relationship for. I mean, like what is that? I mean,
Speaker 1: that's that's how I see it.
Speaker 2: I don't like what he does though. This is my
Speaker 2: biggest problem all of a sudden with these women that
Speaker 2: he goes for. He makes them feel bad about what
Speaker 2: they are that I cannot let fall off because I've
Speaker 2: had in my past people have done that to me. Yes,
Speaker 2: so I recognize it when I see it.
Speaker 1: Of course, in the trade of his his Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: sure he'll do the same thing, you know, to the
Speaker 1: next one. But because we really don't know somewhere.
Speaker 2: Unless he finds a plain girl, like a plane like
Speaker 2: girl behind.
Speaker 1: Well, this girl supposedly has no social media. I mean
Speaker 1: she does have it, but she doesn't have a presence
Speaker 1: on it, and she's not like, you know, documenting like
Speaker 1: her life on social media. But that doesn't mean anything.
Speaker 1: I mean she's still a very public person and her
Speaker 1: family couldn't be more public either. I mean her father
Speaker 1: was just running for president the girl next door, so
Speaker 1: it really he's really contradicting himself. And like I always
Speaker 1: knew that there was more behind it, and you know
Speaker 1: hopefully that. I mean, their divorce is not going to
Speaker 1: be very quick because they have no prenups. And how
Speaker 1: do you feel about prenupsn't.
Speaker 2: Just walk away? This is how I feel about prenups.
Speaker 2: I don't love them. But if it's but if it's
Speaker 2: a deal breaker, if it's a deal breaker, then there
Speaker 2: would be a contingency that I would maybe I don't
Speaker 2: want to go after whatever you made before you met me,
Speaker 2: but from meeting me or from being with me, and
Speaker 2: whatever is moving forward and a lifestyle I get used to.
Speaker 2: And I my biggest thing Alexi as a single woman
Speaker 2: is is future financial security. If I'm giving my time
Speaker 2: to a man, I would have to know that I
Speaker 2: would be taking care of for the rest of my life.
Speaker 2: Maybe I don't want your big high rises in New York. Okay, Okay.
Speaker 2: If that means that that I'm going to still get married,
Speaker 2: but I'm going to be okay for the rest of
Speaker 2: my life, then fine. You know that's that's the way
Speaker 2: I look at it.
Speaker 1: So then you're probably not gonna get married. I just
Speaker 1: I'm telling.
Speaker 2: You it's not my goal.
Speaker 1: That's totally no. I'm just saying because you know, I
Speaker 1: feel like prenups are important and necessary. But if you
Speaker 1: get through that, because I mean, you really have to
Speaker 1: get uncomfortable when you're doing a prenup, and like it
Speaker 1: really becomes a problem and it becomes a fight between
Speaker 1: you know you.
Speaker 2: I don't like it.
Speaker 1: It's just like, you know, I feel like I feel
Speaker 1: that the same, But I do believe necessary.
Speaker 2: What I sign it short. I'm not saying I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: I sure would not.
Speaker 1: As long as it's fair. You know, there's a lot
Speaker 1: of prenups obviously that aren't fair. Everything in life is
Speaker 1: about being fair. So I think that they're necessary. In
Speaker 1: this case, that would have saved themselves a lot of
Speaker 1: trouble because they've only been married for two years. Of course,
Speaker 1: Oh I think so. I think that. I feel like
Speaker 1: women always go after the guy's money just because it's
Speaker 1: where it hurts them. How do you get a guy back?
Speaker 1: You know what I mean by hurting like his money,
Speaker 1: like taking away his money. Every guy hates that. But
Speaker 1: and how do you get a woman back? You date younger,
Speaker 1: like in our case, right, or like something like that.
Speaker 1: That's what they would do, Like, Okay, big deal, you're
Speaker 1: dating a twenty five year old or a thirty year
Speaker 1: old who cares? You know, totally.
Speaker 2: I love what they believe. Oh it's really love.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. Yeah. See if they fall in love with
Speaker 1: like the pool guy or who are just like a
Speaker 1: regular guy. But but yeah, but now, I don't think
Speaker 1: their divorce is going to be over very quickly, just
Speaker 1: because they have no cleanup and they've made so much
Speaker 1: money the two of them, and the two years that
Speaker 1: they were married, and they had so many projects together.
Speaker 1: They're gonna lose a lot of money in their house,
Speaker 1: on their sixty million dollar house, but.
Speaker 2: Goes down.
Speaker 1: But but you see, they had to preen up. She
Speaker 1: could have already signed it, like signed a divorce and
Speaker 1: said okay, I'm out and that's it. So sometimes it's better,
Speaker 1: I mean not sometimes I think it's necessary all the time,
Speaker 1: especially when there's so many assets and so much wealth.
Speaker 2: It's a shame. She's worked very, very hard to get
Speaker 2: to where she is. She's just sacrificed a lot in
Speaker 2: her life, and she she really just deserves to be happy.
Speaker 1: I want her to be happy too.
Speaker 2: I really just again, you know what, I wish for
Speaker 2: him to be happy and move on away from her.
Speaker 1: And he's never going to be happy. He's never Guys
Speaker 1: like this are never happy with themselves, Like they're never
Speaker 1: happy with themselves. And he's not going to fix himself,
Speaker 1: like he just really you know, that dark, dark side
Speaker 1: that he has of himself, it's he's never going to
Speaker 1: be able to fix that. He's just going to go
Speaker 1: on to the next and the next and the next,
Speaker 1: and that's how he'll live.
Speaker 2: And you know, I mean, what are the signs that
Speaker 2: women should look for? Or even men and women to
Speaker 2: look for when they get involved with somebody like this, Like, well,
Speaker 2: it's hard in the beginning because here's the love letters
Speaker 2: and the you know she loved him.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I think he loved her too, in his
Speaker 1: own way. I mean, I don't think guys like this
Speaker 1: really love anybody. You know, they just don't know, they
Speaker 1: don't have that emotional intimacy and maturity to like fall
Speaker 1: in love like that, because if not, he would still
Speaker 1: be fighting for to save their marriage. I mean there's
Speaker 1: no reason. I mean, his excuse about the public life
Speaker 1: that she has and he doesn't want to live it.
Speaker 2: And it is that a quote from him though? Was
Speaker 2: that an actual.
Speaker 1: Well, those were the signs right after the docu series
Speaker 1: came out there, that's what happened. I mean, like a
Speaker 1: few months later, there was the last time they saw
Speaker 1: him together. That was like February something, March twenty ninth
Speaker 1: to solumn in New York, and now she's stayed in
Speaker 1: April twenty sixth, so it was literally two months after that.
Speaker 1: So it's kind of like it looks like he planted
Speaker 1: the scene, right.
Speaker 2: What about like Sophia Bagara and Joe Magnello or however
Speaker 2: you say, is right, like he wanted children. We all
Speaker 2: knew Sophia Vaguard did not want more.
Speaker 1: Children, right, Well, he says his story. Now he's saying
Speaker 1: it's different. He said that we actually talked about Sophia too,
Speaker 1: and that's what she's saying. But I guess that he
Speaker 1: let her go with it. And then he said at
Speaker 1: one point that they tried the first nine years, you know,
Speaker 1: to have a child, and it didn't happen. So he
Speaker 1: told her, I would never leave you because the all
Speaker 1: the men say that. Apparently all these all these men
Speaker 1: say that he told her the same thing, I'll never
Speaker 1: leave you because of that. If you know, it didn't happen.
Speaker 1: We weren't able to have children, and I'm never going
Speaker 1: to leave you for that. And apparently she was the
Speaker 1: one that left them. You know, truthfully, we're never really
Speaker 1: going to know, right just like you know he knows because.
Speaker 2: You know, she had embryos. She had embryos left over
Speaker 2: that she fought with her ex husband and I so
Speaker 2: that that story doesn't make sense to me. This story
Speaker 2: doesn't make sense to me. We are not going to know.
Speaker 1: To be continued, I don't think we're I don't think
Speaker 1: I'm going to be able to close this chapter of
Speaker 1: Jennifer in my life. I feel like so many more
Speaker 1: things are going to developed.
Speaker 2: I have a lot of faith in you that you
Speaker 2: are going to get to the bottom of this, and
Speaker 2: you're not going to rest until you get to the
Speaker 2: bottom of this.
Speaker 1: No, I'm pounting on her writing a book. I'm counting
Speaker 1: on her writing a memoir like something she needs to
Speaker 1: expose them anyways. No, I just think again, just because
Speaker 1: I feel like he's created that narrative. That's what I'm
Speaker 1: upset about, because you know what if that say the truth,
Speaker 1: like I'm all about saying the truth, just say the truth.
Speaker 1: Say listen, I'm going through a midlife crisis. You know
Speaker 1: I'm not. You know, I thought I was in love
Speaker 1: with you and I wanted this kind of you.
Speaker 2: It's me or something.
Speaker 1: But thenever he doesn't want to take right, he doesn't
Speaker 1: want to take accountability or responsibility, And of course it's
Speaker 1: just easier to blame it on the other person that's
Speaker 1: been married and divorced four times and goes from one
Speaker 1: relationship to the other. It's like she's the problem. You
Speaker 1: know what, Jlo, this time it's not you.
Speaker 2: Don't beat yourself up over this.
Speaker 1: Well, my friend, it's been so much fun talking to you,
Speaker 1: so fine you I want you to come to Miami.
Speaker 2: I want to come so bad as soon as things
Speaker 2: come down over here. I'm leaving for Portugal and then
Speaker 2: I have a few things, but I think I'm going
Speaker 2: to make a trip.
Speaker 1: I have a wonderful trip. You have so much fun
Speaker 1: in Portugal. It's beautiful. You're going to really enjoy it,
Speaker 1: enjoy your time with the family, and we'll catch up
Speaker 1: your phone. I have. I used to live in Spain,
Speaker 1: so when I live there, that's the beauty of living
Speaker 1: in Europe. It's so easy to travel, like throughout Europe.
Speaker 1: But it's really beautiful. And yeah, we'd love to have
Speaker 1: you back on because you like to talk as much as.
Speaker 2: Me and I love it so much. I love it.
Speaker 2: I'm going to keep like I'll be texting you because
Speaker 2: let's keep in touch about what's going on here.
Speaker 1: For sure, No, no, for sure we're going to be like, ah,
Speaker 1: did you see this? But definitely I would love to
Speaker 1: have you back on. It's been so much fun. You're
Speaker 1: great to talk to. I love your wisdom, I love
Speaker 1: your energy, and I love you. Thank you.
Speaker 2: I think I love you too. Kissens to everyone, Bye bye,
Speaker 2: thank you.
Speaker 1: For having me, bye, Thank you for listening. Guys, thanks
Speaker 1: for listening.
Speaker 2: Follow us on Instagram at iPort Forward Podcast.
Speaker 1: Make sure to write us a review and leave us
Speaker 1: five stars. Attaluo Astella Proxima