Speaker 1: Gambling was something that I did.
Speaker 2: This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble.
Speaker 1: One of my bookies died at the kitchen Table, a
Speaker 1: podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling.
Speaker 1: One bet, another bet, another bet.
Speaker 2: Without doing the actual gambling.
Speaker 1: You're a coward. It's easy to have a scapegoat.
Speaker 2: And now join my bad Larry, Shay and Irving and
Speaker 2: Dylan the graphics guy.
Speaker 1: I have friends.
Speaker 2: Here's Dan Patrick.
Speaker 1: All right, everybody's back. Hello, Dan, Hey bad Larry, Dylan's here,
Speaker 1: Shay's here. Ray is back. Now. Let me just start
Speaker 1: with Ray here for a moment, because Ray had a
Speaker 1: problem over the weekend. He went to a service last week,
Speaker 1: went to a funeral and he went up to get communed. Well,
Speaker 1: he's not supposed to have a community.
Speaker 2: Nope, nope.
Speaker 1: And you went up and you received the body of
Speaker 1: Christ without permission, Like you're not supposed to do that. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I had no idea. I was just kind of following
Speaker 3: along with what everyone was doing with all the hands
Speaker 3: stuff and everything.
Speaker 4: And make a great Catholic.
Speaker 3: And I just went up there and I took it.
Speaker 3: And then afterwards I was like texting Dylan and Eric
Speaker 3: the big German and they're like, you shouldn't have to
Speaker 3: take that. You're probably going to hell. Now. I did
Speaker 3: some research and it seems like they might be correct.
Speaker 5: You're supposed to put your arms in an X when
Speaker 5: they come to you if you're living in sin. And
Speaker 5: you're living in sin, you're fornicating right now.
Speaker 3: There was also like, there's also like seventy people there
Speaker 3: and I would have been the only one to do
Speaker 3: good as Brian X.
Speaker 5: So what dude, Jesus would have seen that?
Speaker 1: Now?
Speaker 3: Can I repent?
Speaker 1: No, you're doing Shaye has a close friendship with Jesus.
Speaker 5: Amen. Yes, and he'll tell me exactly what I need
Speaker 5: to get later on my nightly prayers.
Speaker 4: A Canaanable type relationship, I think.
Speaker 5: I remember I was at a Catholic wedding and I
Speaker 5: did that once because I was fornicating and the priest
Speaker 5: got so mad. I put my ex up and he
Speaker 5: was like, what in the world are you doing. I
Speaker 5: was like, I'm living in sand, father, and that was it.
Speaker 5: He was so mad.
Speaker 1: When's the last time you went to a confessional, bad Larry,
Speaker 1: when's the last time you went to confession?
Speaker 6: Oh, confession has been a long time Dan, probably fifteen years,
Speaker 6: but yeah, twenty five years.
Speaker 1: You haven't done anything really like you, you and your
Speaker 1: wife and your sister in law.
Speaker 4: That ain't sen.
Speaker 6: I have nothing to confess.
Speaker 1: Okay, Dylan, what about you?
Speaker 7: Never in my life, Dan, I haven't spent a ton
Speaker 7: of time in churches except for funerals and weddings.
Speaker 1: What about yu?
Speaker 8: Shit?
Speaker 5: Never. The only way to the fathers through the son.
Speaker 5: You don't use a priest as a conduit. I'm a Protestant, Danny.
Speaker 5: We're going to heaven.
Speaker 1: Okay. It's been a long time since I've gone to
Speaker 1: the confessional, like childhood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean after
Speaker 1: a while, I went, wait, this is weird.
Speaker 5: It's goofy.
Speaker 1: I can see the priest and he can see me,
Speaker 1: So he's going to hold this over my head the
Speaker 1: rest of my life. One. Yeah, that guy's had impure thoughts.
Speaker 8: Yes, Marvin, what about taxi cab confessions?
Speaker 5: Oh that's what you know what working girl confessions. They
Speaker 5: can pull stories out of me. They're like therapists, but naked.
Speaker 4: Says the priest too.
Speaker 1: Watch that. Let's recap from last week. God shay, you're terrible.
Speaker 5: Ah yeah, it's really getting right in the corn hold, Danny.
Speaker 1: It was you lost three units. Your money is sixteen. Dylan,
Speaker 1: you won three and a half and your money is eighteen.
Speaker 1: Bad Larry won a half a unit. He's up two units,
Speaker 1: So congratulations there bad.
Speaker 6: Lairy hanging in there. Yeah, I got to add one thing.
Speaker 6: I got to add one thing to my picks. Right
Speaker 6: before Marvin called me, a buddy of mine called in.
Speaker 6: He's given them the one horse in the third race
Speaker 6: at Aqueduct. You know, if you go on a site,
Speaker 6: you might have to be bellm on a spell my Aqueduct,
Speaker 6: but uh, probably a two o'clock start. You guys, throw
Speaker 6: a little money on the one horse.
Speaker 1: Okay, so it's third pray straight.
Speaker 6: I want one unit on it, okay on the show.
Speaker 1: What's the name of the horse?
Speaker 6: I don't even know it. It's like I can look
Speaker 6: it up. It's like rat with It's like a six
Speaker 6: lettered name. It's the one horse, it's the favor. It's
Speaker 6: probably going to go off at even money.
Speaker 5: Okay.
Speaker 1: Ray is looking at that right now, so we'll get back.
Speaker 5: To you on that.
Speaker 6: Okay. I want one unit on a toe, all right?
Speaker 1: Nobody bet on the Ryan Garcia fight Oh my god.
Speaker 5: You see you failed the drug test too, Yeah, son
Speaker 5: of a gun.
Speaker 7: Yeah, after bet so. Actually, there's an interesting thing. He
Speaker 7: bet what two million on himself and one like twelve million.
Speaker 7: How does that work with the like obviously if he
Speaker 7: get test like the be test is positive, they stripped
Speaker 7: the wind.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it wasn't even a title fight. It wasn't because
Speaker 5: he didn't make weight.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he was like three pounds over.
Speaker 5: Yeah, he was drinking a beer. Dude, he went fucking crazy,
Speaker 5: or pretended he went crazy. Odds went against him. Then
Speaker 5: he bet on himself one handedly juiced, and now he's
Speaker 5: failing tests.
Speaker 4: Well like that twelve million dollars.
Speaker 7: That's like, if he actually fails that second test, the
Speaker 7: casino is probably gonna come a knock in, I would imagine.
Speaker 1: I would think, why don't you just let boxers do steroids?
Speaker 5: Totally agree?
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, it's just you. I mean they're doing
Speaker 1: it in just go yeah, just go ahead, go on
Speaker 1: in there. Uh, let's see anything else he was a
Speaker 1: uh I mean that was plus six hundred. I mean
Speaker 1: that's that's a big upset. Anything worth recapping, Larry any
Speaker 1: victory laps you want to take.
Speaker 6: I think I won a couple of my series bets already.
Speaker 6: I know Ray hasn't given us credit for them yet.
Speaker 6: I guess he calls it off till all the series
Speaker 6: are over.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I can ask Ray.
Speaker 5: Ray.
Speaker 3: As of right now, you just have the Nuggets, which
Speaker 3: were minus three tens, so congratulations.
Speaker 1: That's not a big win. Layer.
Speaker 6: The Nugget beat. All the other ones weren't over yet.
Speaker 6: I didn't. I didn't have the Celtics.
Speaker 3: You did not have the Celtics. You have the Knicks
Speaker 3: to beat the Sixers and the MAVs to beat the Clippers.
Speaker 1: Why do we every week have to tell you what you.
Speaker 6: I write them down. I'm not even writing them down anymore, Dan,
Speaker 6: I just text them on my phone when I sent
Speaker 6: them to Ray. So I remember what I picked today,
Speaker 6: But next week I won't remember. When that one horse
Speaker 6: wins the third, I won't remember it.
Speaker 1: Okay, So Larry won a couple. He's doing pretty well. Shay,
Speaker 1: that's bad.
Speaker 5: I'll turn around. Danny his baseball.
Speaker 1: Okay, Dylan, you actually did Okay?
Speaker 7: Actually, yeah, my hail Mary heat to win the series
Speaker 7: against the Celtics at plus one thousand did not pan.
Speaker 1: It did not.
Speaker 7: It did not, but Dan big one of the week
Speaker 7: calls across thousand money line versus Delaware plus one hundred.
Speaker 1: Who saw that one coming? Ten? No, buddy, Yeah, I'll
Speaker 1: take what I can get it this way. Yeah.
Speaker 5: Fucking Lakers, by the way, Jesus Christ, I suck bombs.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, all right, So Larry bets this week? Do
Speaker 1: you want us to tell you what you bet?
Speaker 6: I let's go over what I remember and then we'll
Speaker 6: go from there. I want, I know, I bet the
Speaker 6: Knicks for the first ten points, first one of ten.
Speaker 1: Yes.
Speaker 6: Oh, I have a baseball game this afternoon. You have
Speaker 6: the US at one o'clock.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to yeah, yeah, all right, that's minus
Speaker 1: one ten against the Cubs.
Speaker 6: Okay, I have the Knicks tonight.
Speaker 1: You have the next plus three okay.
Speaker 6: And I have the Do I have had the under
Speaker 6: in that Nick game?
Speaker 1: You have the first half under?
Speaker 6: First half under?
Speaker 1: That's exactly right, one two and a half. I like that?
Speaker 6: Are they all that I put in so far?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 1: Joe llenb points and rebounds? Oh yeah, forty one and
Speaker 1: a half.
Speaker 6: I'm thirty one and a half. Forty one, forty one
Speaker 6: and a half thirty three and thirteen. Yeah, I'm good
Speaker 6: with that.
Speaker 1: So that means I think it's points horse thirty one
Speaker 1: and a half and then like ten and a half rebounds.
Speaker 1: That's what the individual numbers are. So you've you've got that,
Speaker 1: and then you you have the horse at Aqueduct. Did
Speaker 1: we find who that is?
Speaker 5: Ray?
Speaker 3: Yeah? You said race three, right, Larry.
Speaker 6: Yes, race three and the one horse Rottney. Yeah, that's it.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, seven to five all right, so you got
Speaker 1: one unit on the yep, all right. And then Kentucky Derby, Oh.
Speaker 6: I did uh, I know they changed their numbers on me.
Speaker 6: But it's a two four to ten exact of box
Speaker 6: right now. But last last year we didn't pay out
Speaker 6: on the Derby, so I'm assuming we're going to put
Speaker 6: that off to the side or I still have like
Speaker 6: seventeen units over there somewhere.
Speaker 1: There we go, they're in the trash. Okay, all right,
Speaker 1: So that's uh, you've got the exact a box right, okay.
Speaker 6: For it was two four eleven, but uh, some horse
Speaker 6: backed out and they added the new horse to the
Speaker 6: twenty spot and those middle numbers moved up once. So
Speaker 6: it's a two four to ten exact of boxing.
Speaker 1: All right, we have that. Uh shay, you're up next,
Speaker 1: all right? Uh Basketball, the Association, I got the over.
Speaker 1: It's two hundred point five now yeah, one nine yesterday,
Speaker 1: Well that's yesterday. I'm just saying it's moving Nick seventy
Speaker 1: six ers over two hundred and a half. Baseball, I
Speaker 1: got the Balmer Orioles versus the Yankees, but I got
Speaker 1: Balmer plus one hundred. I got the over in that
Speaker 1: game nine. I got the Cleveland name not to be
Speaker 1: mentioned plus one fifteen against the Astros San Francisco Boston
Speaker 1: under nine and a half and then the Texas Nationals
Speaker 1: over eight. Oh, golf, Danny, I got a parlay. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I'm crawling. Well, it's golf and it's a parlay.
Speaker 1: What could go wrong? I don't think I won a
Speaker 1: golf betting, like, yeah, not a single one. I can
Speaker 1: pretty much guarantee somebody's gonna take Sea Wu Kim in
Speaker 1: this room. Is that you?
Speaker 4: No, I'm sung Jay all Sunday.
Speaker 1: It is not.
Speaker 7: He actually just won something in my career. I think,
Speaker 7: oh okay, but I didn't bet it.
Speaker 5: Top twenty parlay. I got Jordan Speeth. God, zero plus
Speaker 5: three sixty six.
Speaker 1: I'm do Danny, that's losing. Yeah, okay, Dylan, what do
Speaker 1: you have? All right?
Speaker 7: Dan, I'll start with the derby. We actually got at
Speaker 7: inside tip on the show today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Cadillac in Arkansas called Yep. And when a man
Speaker 1: named Cadillac gives you a betting tip, you take it. Now.
Speaker 1: I guess he's somebody in his family tree has a horse,
Speaker 1: Honor Marie. Yeah, and twenty to one. Twenty to one,
Speaker 1: so you're taking to win? Oh, okay, and then any
Speaker 1: any other couple more.
Speaker 5: Okay.
Speaker 7: I'm also taking Track Phantom to win at twenty to one,
Speaker 7: and I got a couple of trifectas straight up not boxed.
Speaker 7: Uh first one one Hono Marie, two door Knock and
Speaker 7: three Track Phantom. And then the second trifect I got
Speaker 7: one door Knock, two Fierceness who is the favorite, and
Speaker 7: three Forever Young. And then also golf Dan because I'm
Speaker 7: a slow learner, like my counterpart over here, Keith Mitchell
Speaker 7: Kashmir Keith top ten plus four fifty and Hayden Buckley
Speaker 7: top ten plus thirty five hundred.
Speaker 5: Great lax name by the.
Speaker 1: Way, Hayden. Oh yeah, Hayden Buckley the third exactly right.
Speaker 5: They call him Trig.
Speaker 1: And then you got hockey.
Speaker 7: Uh yeah, I got a series bet my Rangers to
Speaker 7: beat the Hurricanes plus one forty.
Speaker 1: They usually have trouble with them, but this is a
Speaker 1: different Rangers team. Dan, Okay, yes, Marvin.
Speaker 8: Sorry, did you guys just see that the Rangers or
Speaker 8: the Hurricanes said they're only selling tickets to people in
Speaker 8: North Carolina?
Speaker 5: Yeah, just so you're doing it by zip code?
Speaker 8: Yeah, yep. They don't want to repeat of what happened
Speaker 8: with the sixers in the Knicks.
Speaker 4: How well can that work?
Speaker 1: Are you monitor?
Speaker 8: Also, the funny thing is about North Carolina and like
Speaker 8: Atlanta places like that. There's full of.
Speaker 1: New Yorkers here. Yeah, absolutely those since the pandemic.
Speaker 8: Yeah sure, Charlotte in Atlanta was a bunch of people
Speaker 8: from New York.
Speaker 4: Well, we fucking gave them the Hurricanes well heart hard.
Speaker 1: Yeah only d d dun dum du dun du. The
Speaker 1: mall at Hartford, Yeah, I was there last last game.
Speaker 1: You were How depressing was it Wasn't It was like
Speaker 1: a wake? No, no, no, it was kind of a
Speaker 1: celebratory wake. Everybody. Everybody knew you were dying, but we
Speaker 1: were celebrating you dying.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's my favorite.
Speaker 1: That the best. Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I took my son to see the Whale the last
Speaker 1: game he's He was like, why are they given all
Speaker 1: their gear away?
Speaker 4: There?
Speaker 1: Not gonna need it where they're going anything else there do?
Speaker 8: Yep?
Speaker 1: I got a little NBA parlay tonight.
Speaker 8: Oh.
Speaker 1: I did run into the Whaler's owner at a Jim
Speaker 1: Valvano golf tournament.
Speaker 5: Wow.
Speaker 1: Well, the problem was I didn't know that he was
Speaker 1: the owner of the Whalers. Now the you know, Caroline Panthers,
Speaker 1: and I'm ripping him. No, I'm ripping him in front
Speaker 1: of Sean Burke, the goaltender, and Kevin Deneen, and they
Speaker 1: were on the team and we're just talking in a
Speaker 1: cocktail party and I'm like, your owner, he's a carpet
Speaker 1: ba blah blah blah blah blah blah. And you could
Speaker 1: see these guys they're trying to let me know to
Speaker 1: stop talking. And then all of a sudden, you know,
Speaker 1: I'm talking to him like this, and then I look
Speaker 1: over and he reaches out and introduces himself, and I said,
Speaker 1: I meant everything I said, Yes, I swear to god,
Speaker 1: I did Danny what the fuck? You know what what
Speaker 1: he did to Hartford? Oh that was bad. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: was dirty. It was dirty and cared about the whale.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he probably didn't.
Speaker 5: So they got fucking Hartford.
Speaker 1: I'm sure he was well aware of. Well, remember Hartford
Speaker 1: was getting the Patriots. Remember when that was? It was
Speaker 1: like Victor Kiam, that's right. And I remember my wife saying,
Speaker 1: are we getting the Patriots? I go, no, never the
Speaker 1: Hartford Patriots. A ring to that was?
Speaker 8: That was such a good business movie.
Speaker 1: No, I think that was Victor Chiam, wasn't it? Did
Speaker 1: he already sell it to.
Speaker 8: I think that the robber Craft. It's like, you know what,
Speaker 8: let's build Gillette right next to Fox.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 8: Yeah, we're coming Hartford, Adrian's landing, We're coming to Harvard here,
Speaker 8: coming to Hartford.
Speaker 1: What else do you have? Their deal?
Speaker 7: So NBA parlay tonight. I got the Bucks plus eight
Speaker 7: against the Pacers and the Sixers minus three against the Knicks,
Speaker 7: and that's plus two fifty.
Speaker 1: Okay, mad Larry, anything any parting wisdom, shots, wisdom, anything
Speaker 1: we have.
Speaker 6: I have a cornhole tournament at seven o'clock tonight in
Speaker 6: the backyard. The no, and that's that's works two to
Speaker 6: nine o'clock nicknames.
Speaker 5: We're gonna get first place, Larry, I believe it. Yeah,
Speaker 5: No one's missing that hole.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So, by the way, Shane Irving podcast, wherever you
Speaker 1: get your podcast, it's uh any how would you sum up?
Speaker 5: Well, we have the show on Friday, and I think
Speaker 5: we're going to talk about a lot of current events
Speaker 5: that are in the news right now. Some protesting. Yeah,
Speaker 5: time in with student loan forgiveness, time in with how
Speaker 5: democracy is failing us all and we should turn to
Speaker 5: a benevolent dictator and make our lives simpler. But you know,
Speaker 5: we'll get to it.
Speaker 1: You think that he would solve all.
Speaker 5: This benevolent dictator? Yeah, yeah, absolutely, American Caesar Danny take
Speaker 5: away the right to vote. It doesn't we're all abusing
Speaker 5: it anyway, We're too stupid to vote for the right person.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's how the dictator would get in office.
Speaker 5: No, he's not a real dictator. We need an actual dictator,
Speaker 5: like a real American.
Speaker 1: Singer, for example, like The Rock.
Speaker 5: I think The Rock is a great choice, or Stone
Speaker 5: Cold Steve Austin. I think you could shepherd our country
Speaker 5: to Great Heights.
Speaker 4: Dictator stone Cold would be pretty cool.
Speaker 5: It'd be amazing, it'd be awesome. And you just think
Speaker 5: about it, You never have to go to the ballot
Speaker 5: box again ever, and you wouldn't be able to, like,
Speaker 5: you know, be politically active. You know how much easier
Speaker 5: a life would be. Danny would would just be propaganda.
Speaker 1: Would you trust the Rock? Oh?
Speaker 5: Yeah, hell yeah, I trust the Rock. Yeah, I'd go
Speaker 5: to Civil War for the Rock. You would absolutely Civil
Speaker 5: War two, Civil War two point Oh. Anybody see that
Speaker 5: movie what the Avengers Civil War?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 5: See it?
Speaker 1: I heard about it.
Speaker 5: Okay, well you should see it.
Speaker 1: Like the reality is already bumming me out. I don't
Speaker 1: need to see a movie on what could happen if
Speaker 1: this escalate?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 5: But that movie is like my wet dream, like this
Speaker 5: could happen. This would be so great, This would be awesome.
Speaker 5: If we just eliminated journalism, eliminated democracy, it would be easy.
Speaker 5: It would be a happy day for Shane Ring.
Speaker 1: Can't can't wait for the podcast then all the current events, I'll.
Speaker 5: Get canceled again. They were trying to cancel me on Twitter.
Speaker 5: I had somebody complaining to Apple to Spotify a bunch
Speaker 5: of different places for uh, well, don't don't bring that
Speaker 5: garbage to this podcast. Oh, everything I'm saying is a joke, Danny.
Speaker 5: I'm just messing around, Okay.
Speaker 1: Even when you joke about the tennis wives in your
Speaker 1: neighborhood who drink chardonnay in bad mouth, you you're joking
Speaker 1: about them. You're not joking about.
Speaker 5: Them, Anny, Tennis is very popular in Fairfield count So.
Speaker 1: Is drinking chardone.
Speaker 5: Yeah, especially if you're a wife with no job. Yeah,
Speaker 5: it's real, pop. Your job is backhand and fucking drinking. Okay,
Speaker 5: but your wife doesn't have a job, does she No,
Speaker 5: she's married to me, So that's pretty much the whole
Speaker 5: job is the full time gig. I got a call
Speaker 5: from the school nurse today. Oh, Danny, I almost fucking
Speaker 5: had a conneption. I'm sitting there in a meeting because
Speaker 5: I got an actual job, a job, and I get call.
Speaker 5: I ignore it. I get another call and it says
Speaker 5: the kid's school. It's like, I'm not fucking taking this call.
Speaker 5: Get another call now. Like the third call is like
Speaker 5: I gotta fucking take this shit. Like what if there's
Speaker 5: you know, a shooting or something, and I'm like, the
Speaker 5: one call they can make before.
Speaker 1: The I think we need done anyway.
Speaker 5: So I finally pick up the damn phone, and of
Speaker 5: course this nurse is like from London, so she's got
Speaker 5: this accent, like fancy who to do?
Speaker 1: And she's like, your daughter has slammed her finger into
Speaker 1: a door.
Speaker 5: And I do suggest a pediatric visit.
Speaker 1: I was like, put me on the phone with my
Speaker 1: daughter right now.
Speaker 5: Put her on the phone. What happened, Oh, daddy, slam
Speaker 5: a door? Go back to class now, Like, what are
Speaker 5: you gonna do? What are you gonna do to put
Speaker 5: a fucking cast on your finger? You gotta go back
Speaker 5: to class right now. Four fucking calls over a fucking
Speaker 5: door jam. Get over yourself.
Speaker 1: More sensitivity on Shay and Irving. Wherever you get your
Speaker 1: podcast if it's still available on Apple and Spotify in
Speaker 1: some of these other places. Bad Larry, thanks for joining
Speaker 1: us as always.
Speaker 6: Thank you guys. Good luck say Dylan Ray, good luck.
Speaker 1: Guys, Larry. That's the thank you, Larry, especially with Cornhole
Speaker 1: coming up later on tonight.
Speaker 5: Perfect.
Speaker 1: That's it. I think that we've done it for uh,
Speaker 1: for Dylan the graphics guy, for Marvin the Prince Shay
Speaker 1: and Irving and Ray gone to Hell. Thanks for joining
Speaker 1: us this week, and Dan Patrick takes a gamble. I'll
Speaker 1: talk to you next week.