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Speaker 1: Hey, folks. Before we get into the episode, I wanted

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Speaker 1: to let you guys know that this first call deals

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Speaker 1: with a pretty heavy topic that could be a little

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Speaker 1: too intense for some people. I was personally debating myself

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Speaker 1: whether or not I even wanted to include it in

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Speaker 1: the podcast, but I felt like the caller got a

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Speaker 1: lot out of having the conversation, so I decided to

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Speaker 1: keep it in here. Viewer discretion as advised if you

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Speaker 1: don't like heavy stuff. There are other calls in this

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Speaker 1: podcast as well if you want to skip over the

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Speaker 1: first one at around the twenty minute mark. Okay, let's

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Speaker 1: get into it. Hello, Hi, what's going on, Cash? How's life?

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Speaker 2: You know it's going just just tested positive for COVID yesterday,

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Speaker 2: so I'm just hanging.

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Speaker 1: Out, yep, nothing nothing to do except to deteriorate.

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Speaker 2: I like it precisely.

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Speaker 1: What's going on? Cash?

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Speaker 2: So I wanted to talk.

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Speaker 3: To you about.

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Speaker 2: One of my childhood best friends, who I met when

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Speaker 2: I was in the fourth grade and I'm now twenty four.

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Speaker 2: He about a year ago went to jail for child

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Speaker 2: pornography and I haven't talked to him since, but he's

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Speaker 2: tried to call me several times, and he wrote me

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Speaker 2: a letter to my friend, which I still haven't picked

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Speaker 2: up because I've kind of just been avoiding, avoiding the

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Speaker 2: topic as a whole. But yeah, I suppose that's that's

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Speaker 2: the main part of the issue.

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Speaker 1: So this person has been writing you letters, Yeah, they.

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Speaker 3: Were, to my understanding.

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Speaker 2: To my understanding, they only wrote me one letter so far,

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Speaker 2: and they wrote it to my friend's house. I assume

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Speaker 2: they just didn't know if I was still living in

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Speaker 2: the same location, but uh, I just haven't gone to

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Speaker 2: pick it up because I'm kind of.

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Speaker 1: So so tell me, so, what what what is the

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Speaker 1: timeline of your relationship with this person? Was this peron?

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Speaker 1: I mean when when when it was found out that

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Speaker 1: this person was doing what they were doing, What was

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Speaker 1: your relationship like with them at the time.

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Speaker 2: I had actually been more or less living with them

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Speaker 2: a few months before that, m and we were still

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Speaker 2: extremely close, hanging out at least once a week and

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Speaker 2: talking frequently. And I found out because his girlfriend at

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Speaker 2: the time, uh sent me a screen recording of her

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Speaker 2: going through his photos and.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, you might you might.

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Speaker 1: Want to ditch that screen recording, Oh absolutely, And.

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Speaker 2: I told her too that she should probably not distribute

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Speaker 2: that to anyone at all. Ever.

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Speaker 1: Again, Uh, okay, So I mean how I mean, this

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Speaker 1: is a pretty wild thing for you to know a

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Speaker 1: person for that long, have such a it sounds like

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Speaker 1: close relationship with them, and then this yeah shit comes

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Speaker 1: out of nowhere. I mean, how is that feeling for you?

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Speaker 1: It was.

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Speaker 2: I was kind of in denial about it at first,

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Speaker 2: to be honest, just because I mean, I've I've gone

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Speaker 2: on trips with his family, I've spent time with him

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Speaker 2: and his young cousins, and you know, he's.

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Speaker 3: Met my.

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Speaker 2: Family and my younger sibling, and so at first I

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Speaker 2: think I almost wanted to think that she was making

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Speaker 2: it up or something because they were fighting. But yeah,

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Speaker 2: at this point, I'm just not really sure how I

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Speaker 2: should feel, because he's always been family to me and now.

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Speaker 3: Obviously this is like a.

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Speaker 2: Vapid thing. But at the same time, I don't think

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Speaker 2: that it makes him not human, and I just don't

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Speaker 2: know how or if I should be there for him

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Speaker 2: in any way during this time, If that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: It does does because you have this idea of who

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Speaker 1: this person is, and your idea of who this person is,

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Speaker 1: even when confronted with information that completely shakes it up.

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Speaker 1: You know, if you've known this person for a very

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Speaker 1: long time, your idea of who they are is not

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Speaker 1: just going to vanish immediately. So it's not just going

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Speaker 1: to go away, and it's going to be a long

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Speaker 1: process of like taking in this new information and forming

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Speaker 1: your new ideas about your friend. And it's weird. It's

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Speaker 1: almost like it sounds like it's like a grief. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I'm not a real therapist, A real therapist

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Speaker 1: would say, but it sounds like it's a grief.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, It's it's bizarre because it's almost like I've totally

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Speaker 2: lost this person, right, I mean, the person that I

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Speaker 2: thought I knew. It was almost just like that image

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Speaker 2: was shattered a little bit. And so, but now I'm

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Speaker 2: in a position. So he right before he went to jail,

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Speaker 2: he was talking to his family a bunch about trying

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Speaker 2: to kill himself. And in the past he's had like

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Speaker 2: suicidal ideation I know.

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Speaker 3: And so.

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Speaker 2: I just don't know. Part of me feels like, as

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Speaker 2: a friend, should I be there too to show some

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Speaker 2: kind of support? Is that is that fucked up?

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Speaker 3: Hello?

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Speaker 1: How?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: You know I'm listening. I'm just thinking I I tell

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Speaker 1: me this, Uh, clearly, your relationship with this person was

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Speaker 1: not in a vacuum. You know, his family, you know,

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Speaker 1: other friends of his. Tell me how other people around

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Speaker 1: him that are close to you, how are they reacting?

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Speaker 2: Honestly, it kind of just like fractured our whole friend group.

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Speaker 2: I don't really I'm not really in contact with any

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Speaker 2: of the people that we're all friends with, and to

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Speaker 2: my understanding, they aren't in contact with him either.

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Speaker 1: So now you said that you went on a trip

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Speaker 1: with his family and that it sounds like you're close

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Speaker 1: with his family.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, his mom would introduce me to other family

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Speaker 2: members and say, you know this is this is my

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Speaker 2: daughter essentially, like it.

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Speaker 3: Was that close.

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Speaker 1: Sure. Sure. So I don't have an answer to your question,

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Speaker 1: and I don't know if there's a right or wrong answer.

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Speaker 1: This is a very complicated issue. But it feels like

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Speaker 1: if if I were, if I were in your position,

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Speaker 1: where I would start is conversations is reaching out to

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Speaker 1: his family start there? I would start there by reaching

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Speaker 1: out to his family because they also are probably probably

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Speaker 1: I mean, because look, I mean that's what happens when

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Speaker 1: the person dies. You know, you're the family you know,

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Speaker 1: as we were talking about a grief, you know, you

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Speaker 1: get together with other people who knew the person, and you,

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Speaker 1: you know, hash it out. That's what I would do

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Speaker 1: if I were in a situation, I'd reach out to

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Speaker 1: anyone who you know was in your friend group. I'd

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Speaker 1: reach out to his family. And I think that by

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Speaker 1: talking with them, understanding how they feel, bringing up how

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Speaker 1: your how you're conflicted about whether or not to be supportive,

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Speaker 1: I think that you might have a greater perspective on

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Speaker 1: that problem after talking it out with other people who

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Speaker 1: who are close.

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Speaker 4: To him mm hm.

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Speaker 1: And you might be helping him too, because I'm sure

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Speaker 1: his mother, I'm sure his whole family is having a

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Speaker 1: crazy time processing this as well.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah, I think we've all just kind of

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Speaker 2: treated it as taboo. But that that does absolutely make sense.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, treating it like a taboo is. I

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Speaker 1: don't think that pretending like it is not reality is

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Speaker 1: super helpful. But I think you would have a lot

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Speaker 1: to gain from talking this over with his his friends

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Speaker 1: and family. But I'll say this, I think it's a

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Speaker 1: tough issue. It's a really tough issue. I don't think

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Speaker 1: you're you're a bad person for struggling with your feelings

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Speaker 1: about the situation. I don't think that makes you a

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Speaker 1: bad person. And like I said, it's understandable because you

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Speaker 1: have this long held belief of who this person is,

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Speaker 1: that it's not just going to go away just off

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Speaker 1: the you know, off of off of one thing, especially

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Speaker 1: since you, as you told me, your your gut reaction

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Speaker 1: was like you couldn't even believe it, like you you

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Speaker 1: had all the your head about how you know his

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Speaker 1: girlfriend might be sabotaging him, or any other explanation except yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know, the most harmful one. So I'm not a

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Speaker 1: real therapist or psychologist, but I'm sure there's all sorts

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Speaker 1: of uh, documented brain things that happen in a situation

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Speaker 1: like this that you are probably experiencing right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, absolutely well. And and I think in other countries,

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Speaker 2: to my understanding, some other countries, they are also like

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Speaker 2: more preventative treatments for people who, you know, people who

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Speaker 2: are pedophiles and they realize at some point and uh,

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Speaker 2: instead of it getting to the point where they're actively

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Speaker 2: seeking out you know, child or a child, they they

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Speaker 2: have resources and they can go through therapy. And so

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Speaker 2: I was kind of thinking about that, and because I

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Speaker 2: know that there are treatments available for people who are pedophiles,

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Speaker 2: and how I've always kind of dehumanized pedophiles in a

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Speaker 2: lot of ways just from.

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's fucking disgusting. I think we can all agree,

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Speaker 2: but nonetheless I feel like, go ahead. I just feel

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Speaker 2: like maybe me ignoring all of his calls and not

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Speaker 2: hearing him out it all is kind of shitty on

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Speaker 2: my part. I mean, I don't think that it's totally inexcusable,

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Speaker 2: Like I think that that's an appropriate response to some extent,

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Speaker 2: but I just also have been kind of trying to

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Speaker 2: put myself.

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Speaker 3: In his shoes in a way.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if that sounds weird.

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Speaker 1: No, I I mean, dude, you're dealing with some complex

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Speaker 1: emotions right now. I don't think you can judge yourself

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Speaker 1: too hard on on the things that are popping into

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Speaker 1: your your brain at this uh at this time. And

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Speaker 1: you know, you were talking about treatment, and people have

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Speaker 1: various different philosophies on uh, you know, how we should

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Speaker 1: deal with the evils that exist in our world. Uh,

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Speaker 1: and if we can deal with them, uh, you know,

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Speaker 1: in a rehabilitative way, and some people are are really

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Speaker 1: into that philosophy, and you know, it's it's a difficult

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Speaker 1: philosophy to defend in many cases, but it is a

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Speaker 1: legitimate thing to to to think if you think it. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and so that I think my my takeaway from this

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Speaker 1: view totally totally go talk to the parents, totally, go

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Speaker 1: talk to the friends, and you know, try not to judge,

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Speaker 1: because I can hear in your voice and I get why,

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Speaker 1: because you're in just a fucking crazy situation. You're you're

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Speaker 1: trying not to be too harsh on yourself for the

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Speaker 1: thoughts going through your brain, you know, because you're in

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Speaker 1: the middle of a very tough situation. And so it's

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Speaker 1: it's understandable that you're having many, many, many conflicting reactions

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Speaker 1: about it.

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Speaker 2: Thank you, yek.

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Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, right, I.

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Speaker 2: Got a little works up.

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Speaker 3: I haven't.

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Speaker 2: I haven't talked about this whole bunch since it's happened.

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Speaker 3: I didn't expect to get worked up.

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Speaker 2: But hm, but no, I think that's very good advice.

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Speaker 2: I I absolutely should talk to his parents, and I've

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Speaker 2: just been kind of avoiding it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, talk to his parents, talk to the

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Speaker 1: mutual friends and just I I'm repeating myself, but only

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Speaker 1: because I I believe it a lot. Is that you

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Speaker 1: you shouldn't be too harsh on yourself for any of

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Speaker 1: your your thoughts because they all come from a place

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Speaker 1: of of of love. And you know, people have, people

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Speaker 1: have different fucking philosophies on this ship. And you seem

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Speaker 1: like a very loving person, and uh, fuck man, it's uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, any any anyone can be a loving person

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Speaker 1: when it's easy, and uh, it it takes uh, it

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Speaker 1: takes a lot, and it's a great challenge to be

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Speaker 1: a loving person in a situation like this where it's

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Speaker 1: extremely fucking hard. But if you are a true, true,

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Speaker 1: and I don't I don't, I don't know what what

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Speaker 1: your philosophies on this kind of thing are. But if

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Speaker 1: you are a true, true, true, forgiving, loving person, this

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Speaker 1: is kind of a test of you know, can you

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Speaker 1: can you be that when it's really really hard to

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Speaker 1: be that? And here's what I here's what I'll say.

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Speaker 1: If you can't, that's okay. And if you can, yeah,

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Speaker 1: okay too.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you're right, thank you. Yet, I that's got

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Speaker 2: pretty that's pretty serious topic to bring up.

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Speaker 4: I know, I appreciate yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: No, I appreciate you coming on here, and I know

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Speaker 1: this is a fresh thing for you, So I appreciate

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Speaker 1: you coming on here and uh talking it out with us.

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Speaker 4: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: Is there any anything else that you want to say

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Speaker 1: or any final thoughts, sentiments, feelings about any of this,

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Speaker 1: or anything else that you you want to share before

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Speaker 1: we go?

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Speaker 2: You know, Gek, I just I really adore you.

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Speaker 3: I love your podcast and I think you're great.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate you covering heavy topics and humorous topics and

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Speaker 2: mixing it all up into a mighty fine podcast.

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Speaker 1: Thank you very much, Cash, and wishing you good luck

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Speaker 1: in dealing with this situation. And I think as time

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Speaker 1: wears on, it'll it'll hopefully get a little more clear.

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Speaker 5: Awesome.

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Speaker 1: Thanks Lyle, Thank you Cash. Have a good one.

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Speaker 3: Bye.

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Speaker 1: Hello Momo. Yeah hello, what's going on with you, mamma.

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Speaker 4: I'm having an identity crisis. I grew up in Pakistan

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Speaker 4: and then I moved to Massachusetts about seven years ago

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Speaker 4: for school, and I grew up in a really conservative

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Speaker 4: Muslim bubble and I don't associate with that anymore. And

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Speaker 4: I also don't really associate with people here, and I've

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Speaker 4: managed to make good relationships with people, but I struggle

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Speaker 4: to find a connection with them because I don't feel

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Speaker 4: like they can relate to my experiences and it's hard

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Speaker 4: to find people with similar experiences and views of me.

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Speaker 4: So I'm kind of I feel ostracized by my people,

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Speaker 4: and I don't feel like I quite fit in with

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Speaker 4: people here.

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Speaker 1: And your twenty six. Yeah, what is your day to

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Speaker 1: day life like? What do you do on a daily basis?

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Speaker 4: I work a lot, so I usually spend my daylight

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Speaker 4: hours working and then around the evening time, I'll either

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Speaker 4: do something social with my friends and then go to

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Speaker 4: the gym and then I work out, and then I

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Speaker 4: shower and then I go to bed.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you mentioned the do something social with your friends.

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Speaker 1: Who are who are these friends?

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Speaker 6: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: These are people I know, the people I work with. Uh,

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Speaker 4: these are people that I have gone to school with.

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Speaker 4: Sometimes recently I've been hanging out with on video call

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Speaker 4: with my family back home in the morning and I'll

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Speaker 4: spend like two hours sometimes during breakfast just chatting with them,

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Speaker 4: which has been really nice.

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Speaker 1: M So you're telling me that you don't connect with

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Speaker 1: people because of your your nationality, and you know, a

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Speaker 1: lack of feeling towards your your nationality from from Pakistan

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Speaker 1: and a lack of identification with uh, you know, being American,

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Speaker 1: and you're saying that that's making it hard. You'd have

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Speaker 1: connections with people, but you have these friends who I

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Speaker 1: assume you have connections with. How do you connect with them?

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Speaker 5: I wouldn't really, there's a there's a there's a difference

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Speaker 5: between people in my life who I do social things

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Speaker 5: with and then people I consider friends, if.

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Speaker 4: That makes sense, Like people I genuinely feel connected to.

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Speaker 1: Okay, tell me this, rather than.

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Speaker 4: People I would just do stuff with.

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Speaker 1: Okay, tell me this. What What is it about a

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Speaker 1: person or about a relationship that makes you feel connected

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Speaker 1: to them? How would you define, in the best words

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Speaker 1: you can think of, what that connection looks or feels like.

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Speaker 4: So bear with me a little bit.

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Speaker 5: I'll give you.

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Speaker 4: Like, so I feel like having a similar view on,

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Speaker 4: like a similar view on or like similar experiences. So

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Speaker 4: I grew up in a very conservative Muslim household, and

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Speaker 4: I don't really associate with that anymore. And a lot

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Speaker 4: of eighty ninety percent of my friends are Muslim or

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Speaker 4: they're from Pakistan and they're they're there. They're Bakstani Muslim,

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Speaker 4: and they have a very conservative way of thinking and

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Speaker 4: stuff like religion plays and plays that plays a plays

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Speaker 4: a part in every aspect of your life. And I

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Speaker 4: don't associate with that. So it gets really uncomfortable when

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Speaker 4: someone is just talking and then suddenly there's like an

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Speaker 4: element or like, I feel like a backsplash of like

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Speaker 4: religious themes happening. And I feel like, because I have

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Speaker 4: such a strong view on how how I don't associate

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Speaker 4: myself with that, it's hard to be connected to people

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Speaker 4: who associate with that.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so I'm gonna I'm gonna ask you another thing.

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Speaker 1: Is you gave me an answer that is based on

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Speaker 1: what you do not associate with, which is cool it

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Speaker 1: rules stuff out, But let me get an answer on

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Speaker 1: what you do associate with. M hmm.

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Speaker 4: I like food. I like making food, but I get

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Speaker 4: along with people who really enjoy food and like cooking

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Speaker 4: and you know, talk about food with the same passion

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Speaker 4: that I do.

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Speaker 1: Okay, there we go. You like food, I think, can

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Speaker 1: I can I offer you know a thing? You know,

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Speaker 1: I understand where you're coming from. You know, maybe you're

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Speaker 1: looking for other people you know, maybe maybe I don't know, man,

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Speaker 1: maybe you're like looking for other people who also grew

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Speaker 1: up in highly religious communities that have have since deflected

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Speaker 1: from that. And and you know, uh have that shared

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Speaker 1: experience with you And and maybe that's like a thing

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Speaker 1: that you've been dying to have a conversation with somebody

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Speaker 1: else who who was in a situation like that, and

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Speaker 1: you haven't yet had that connection. I found that person.

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Speaker 1: But if if you're I, you know, you have these

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Speaker 1: friends that you go out with, but you said that

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Speaker 1: you don't feel a connection to them, I guess what

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Speaker 1: I what would be cool is if you kind of

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Speaker 1: broadened your idea or your rubric, you opened your mind

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Speaker 1: up a little bit. You possibly, if we're gonna get

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Speaker 1: douchey in here, open your heart up a little bit,

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Speaker 1: you know, to to to to what you know a

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Speaker 1: connection might look like. Because if you're saying to me,

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Speaker 1: you know, I'm only you know, for whatever reason you

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Speaker 1: feel this way that you're only going to find a

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Speaker 1: deep connection with somebody who has had a near exact

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Speaker 1: experiences you, then you're going to be missing all these

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Speaker 1: other opportunities that are right in front of your face,

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Speaker 1: you can interrupt me.

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Speaker 4: So I don't think I'm looking for people who've had

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Speaker 4: that experience, but I think I'm looking for people who

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Speaker 4: would respect that. And with the people that I have

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Speaker 4: met before, I feel like I always get like an

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Speaker 4: ostracized to some degree that oh, he's kind of like

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Speaker 4: he doesn't really believe like that, and I'm kind of

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Speaker 4: pushed to the side, and people will look at me

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Speaker 4: funny because I don't. They're like, Oh, you don't even God,

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Speaker 4: that's what's wrong with you.

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Speaker 7: Man.

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Speaker 1: Mama, mama, MoMA. I understand, I'm sorr. I'm gonna interrupt

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Speaker 1: you for a second. You're twenty six, you live in Massachusetts,

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Speaker 1: you have a job that has nothing to do with religion.

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Speaker 1: You have friends that sounds like they're not religious. Why

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Speaker 1: why are you in Are you in situations a lot

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Speaker 1: where you're surrounded by heavily religious people?

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Speaker 4: No, but the people I have, I'm surrounded by a

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Speaker 4: lot of people from my community, but even people.

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Speaker 1: Okay, why why why are you? Why are you surrounded

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Speaker 1: by so many religious people.

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Speaker 4: Not religious people? Well? Yes, hm hm huh.

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Speaker 8: Well, I think a lot of it has to do

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Speaker 8: with like the feeling of safety within a community. Oh okay,

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Speaker 8: forget it just for a second, community without racized for.

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Speaker 1: A second, for a second, I don't okay, So all right,

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Speaker 1: so all right, this is that's a new this is

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Speaker 1: a new issue. Then this is a new thing you're

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Speaker 1: not talking about. Okay, what you just said. You want

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Speaker 1: to feel at home with your own people, even though

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Speaker 1: you don't believe in the same things that they do.

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Speaker 1: Which is that the issue? Because that's a totally different

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Speaker 1: issue from I'm out in the world outside of the

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Speaker 1: community of people I grew up with, and and in

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Speaker 1: this world I cannot find connections. Those are two different issues.

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Speaker 1: Which is the one that you feel like we're talking

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Speaker 1: about here?

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Speaker 4: The former?

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Speaker 1: The former? Okay, all right, So you feel as though

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Speaker 1: in your own community you can't connect with people, yes, okay.

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Speaker 1: But out in the world when you're just young, cool,

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Speaker 1: twenty six year old momo at cooking classes, playing fucking

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Speaker 1: frisbee league, whatever it is you're doing, you're having a

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Speaker 1: good time, you're meeting people, things are going Okay. Is

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Speaker 1: that accurate? You can tell me if it's not, because

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Speaker 1: I just painted that stuff. Okay, So that's that's accurate.

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Speaker 1: You know, Man, this is a tough thing because you know,

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Speaker 1: when you're talking, tell me more about your community. When

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Speaker 1: you say your community, do you mean like people back

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Speaker 1: home in Pakistan, people in Boston, who are people in

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Speaker 1: Massachusetts who.

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Speaker 4: Came people who immigrated here, people Pakistani, people from school,

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Speaker 4: people from neighboring countries. Yeah, okay.

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Speaker 1: And then when you're hanging out with your friends from Pakistan,

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Speaker 1: you feel isolated because you don't believe the same things

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Speaker 1: that they do. Yeah, okay. You know, man, I feel

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Speaker 1: for that, I really do. And that's that's hard because

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Speaker 1: it's also.

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Speaker 4: Because it's it's it's not that religion, like because I

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Speaker 4: grew up in that environment. It is a part of

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Speaker 4: my identity, regardless of whether I like it or not.

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Speaker 4: And then when I can't, which is which is with

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Speaker 4: American people here, that I feel like, I just it's

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Speaker 4: it's a big part of me, but I can't get

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Speaker 4: someone to understand that part of me. So whenever there

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Speaker 4: is a connection, it feels like it's it's I can't

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Speaker 4: present myself wholly as a person and feel understood and accepted.

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Speaker 1: Why in my entirety, in your entirety. So we're talking

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Speaker 1: about not just in your community, but out in the

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Speaker 1: world with the Frisbee League people and the cooking class people.

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Speaker 1: You feel as though you cannot present yourself as your

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Speaker 1: whole entirely.

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Speaker 4: Yes, why because I I I feel like it's I can't.

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Speaker 4: It's hard. It's for someone on the other side. And

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Speaker 4: this may this may also be a problem with how

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Speaker 4: I'm presenting myself. But I think it has to do

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Speaker 4: with the other side not completely understanding like I guess

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00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 4: the same way. Like like say, someone from Pakistan who's

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Speaker 4: grown up in the bubble, a conservative religious bubble, will

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Speaker 4: not understand that I no longer associated with religion. It will.

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Speaker 4: They will think that I am just going through a phase,

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Speaker 4: like an emo phase.

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Speaker 1: But okay, but again you're bringing You're bringing us again.

437
00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:57,840
Speaker 1: You're bringing us again back to the original community. And

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you this, this is my read of the situation.

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00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,920
Speaker 1: You tell me if I'm the wrong or right here.

440
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,200
Speaker 1: But you know, my read of the situation is you

441
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 1: came from this, uh you know, you came from packs.

442
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:16,640
Speaker 1: What's your religion or the religion that you grew up with?

443
00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:19,440
Speaker 4: You know, what is it?

444
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:23,840
Speaker 1: Okay? So you came from a very heavily Islamic UH

445
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 1: community and in a way, and I get this because

446
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:29,000
Speaker 1: this is how I feel about being Jewish. I don't

447
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,360
Speaker 1: believe in all the Jewish stuff, but in a way,

448
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 1: you know, I I embrace being culturally Jewish. And I

449
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:37,360
Speaker 1: get a sense from you that you embrace being culturally

450
00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:43,240
Speaker 1: Islamic although you do not believe in God and in

451
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:45,280
Speaker 1: Judy is and fucking nobody believes in God. But I

452
00:31:45,280 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 1: assay from what you're telling me and is in you know,

453
00:31:48,080 --> 00:31:51,640
Speaker 1: the Islamic culture. Everyone does. You know, people do really believe,

454
00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 1: and you're feeling isolated from the people that do believe.

455
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:57,479
Speaker 1: And here's the thing that I think you just gotta

456
00:31:57,840 --> 00:32:00,719
Speaker 1: accept and move on from. And please tell me if

457
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 1: I'm wrong. But you can't. You you can't force other

458
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 1: people to do things. It's like a fundamental, fucking just

459
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: thing you got to accept. You You, you can try

460
00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:15,640
Speaker 1: as hard as you can. You can approach the people

461
00:32:16,040 --> 00:32:19,560
Speaker 1: in this community with as open heart as you got

462
00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:23,600
Speaker 1: you can. You can try to connect with them. You

463
00:32:23,600 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 1: can express yourself openly. And I'm not I'm sure you do.

464
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:29,560
Speaker 1: I'm sure you do. And you can try the best

465
00:32:29,600 --> 00:32:31,960
Speaker 1: you possibly can. And at the end of the day

466
00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:35,560
Speaker 1: after you've tried the best you possibly can. You can't

467
00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:38,440
Speaker 1: make them do anything. You can't make them see it

468
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:40,720
Speaker 1: your way, You can't make them feel a certain way

469
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 1: about you. Just you just can't. You can't, and you gotta.

470
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:46,800
Speaker 8: You gotta accept that feel isolated.

471
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 1: Well yeah, but and dude, I till you get that.

472
00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:55,120
Speaker 1: But let's take a step back from that, and let's

473
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: get into Momo twenty six years old at the cooking

474
00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:03,520
Speaker 1: classes at the Free be Leagues. You know, twenty a

475
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:07,920
Speaker 1: guy out in the world that exists of infinite people

476
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:12,960
Speaker 1: to whom you can go in search of to express yourself.

477
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:15,160
Speaker 1: And I think the more that you the.

478
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:19,960
Speaker 7: More, the more that you will lean into that instead

479
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 7: of lamenting what you cannot change about you know, how

480
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,560
Speaker 7: accepted you are in your own community.

481
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 1: I think you will be happier.

482
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 4: Would it just be like a rebirth of myself and

483
00:33:33,960 --> 00:33:36,080
Speaker 4: just having to give up like a part of my

484
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 4: personality or a part of my identity.

485
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:43,040
Speaker 1: No, you don't have to give up what you don't

486
00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:53,160
Speaker 1: have to. You don't have to give up anything. Yeah, Mamma,

487
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 1: I am you know.

488
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 4: Man.

489
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:59,240
Speaker 1: I hope that this conversation was was helpful to you

490
00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 1: in any way. But like, dude, I really do think

491
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:11,280
Speaker 1: that moving forward, just like you know, just be open

492
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 1: to all the people and experiences and things out in

493
00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:18,120
Speaker 1: the world and and don't like let yourself get so

494
00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:20,080
Speaker 1: down and I'm sure you do, and don't let yourself

495
00:34:20,080 --> 00:34:24,279
Speaker 1: get so down about what you know is going on

496
00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:27,680
Speaker 1: in this community of people from your past. Have a

497
00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:30,320
Speaker 1: lot of love for them, have love for the friends

498
00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:33,279
Speaker 1: that you you know, I know what islamicture. I'm sure

499
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 1: you do, and it's great and you should keep having

500
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:35,600
Speaker 1: that love.

501
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:37,720
Speaker 7: But you can't.

502
00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:40,200
Speaker 1: You can't accept you you can't control what comes back

503
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,680
Speaker 1: into the direction. And I think when you just kind

504
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:46,440
Speaker 1: of acknowledge that, be like, Okay, I acknowledge that, and

505
00:34:46,719 --> 00:34:48,759
Speaker 1: it's not going to change how I feel. And you

506
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:50,480
Speaker 1: go out into the world and you do your thing,

507
00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:55,160
Speaker 1: I think you'll be happier. Was there anything else you

508
00:34:55,160 --> 00:34:56,479
Speaker 1: want to say to the people of the computer before

509
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:56,640
Speaker 1: we go?

510
00:34:58,800 --> 00:35:00,440
Speaker 4: Yeah? I had I had one thing want to say

511
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:02,359
Speaker 4: to you. You should have you should you should try

512
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 4: to get Nathan Fielder on the show. I feel like

513
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 4: you'd be really cool. I think get Yeah.

514
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:09,480
Speaker 1: I love Nathan Fielder. I don't know if he does podcasts,

515
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:15,360
Speaker 1: but uh, yeah, I love like a big fan. We

516
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:16,160
Speaker 1: thank you very much.

517
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:20,879
Speaker 4: I'd like to say that the local representatives and tell

518
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:25,040
Speaker 4: them to make your cities walkable and bikeable and not

519
00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:28,120
Speaker 4: to make America car central. We should get rid of

520
00:35:28,160 --> 00:35:29,600
Speaker 4: cars and make people walk again.

521
00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:31,360
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling a moment.

522
00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:33,560
Speaker 4: Thank you.

523
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's something I've been doing. That's something I've been

524
00:35:37,040 --> 00:35:43,360
Speaker 1: thinking about a lot. Is uh the all right? You know?

525
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:49,600
Speaker 1: Hey forgetting about Islam and Judaism for a second, Christianity, Lord,

526
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:53,560
Speaker 1: give me the strength to accept the things that I

527
00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:54,600
Speaker 1: cannot control.

528
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:56,000
Speaker 7: What is it?

529
00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 1: The wisdom, what the fuck is it? The courage to

530
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:00,839
Speaker 1: accept the things that I likes, to accept the things

531
00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 1: I kind of control, the courage to change the things

532
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:06,360
Speaker 1: I can, the wisdom to know the difference. I'm not Christian,

533
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:08,520
Speaker 1: don't believe it or whatever thing, but I love that.

534
00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:11,560
Speaker 1: I'll take that. You know, I've been thinking a lot

535
00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:14,520
Speaker 1: about the whole things I can and cannot control. And

536
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:17,040
Speaker 1: I'm dude, I don't know. I'm not a real fucking

537
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:19,000
Speaker 1: therapist or anything like that, but I was really getting

538
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,760
Speaker 1: a sense from Momo that he was just like stuck

539
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,319
Speaker 1: on this and I'm like and like, I just want

540
00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:27,320
Speaker 1: to grab his head and point it in the opposite

541
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:32,040
Speaker 1: direction and go, dude, instead of worrying about what is

542
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:34,239
Speaker 1: going on back home and what your mom or your

543
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:37,279
Speaker 1: friend that you went to whatever the Islamic version of

544
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,680
Speaker 1: Hebrew School is, you know, thinks about you. Why don't

545
00:36:40,680 --> 00:36:42,759
Speaker 1: you look at the rest of the whole universe that

546
00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 1: is at your hands and see what you can do

547
00:36:46,719 --> 00:36:49,799
Speaker 1: with that. And I hope he does. And I'm a

548
00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:57,160
Speaker 1: gecko guy on the computer. Hello, Hi, Hey, is this

549
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:01,760
Speaker 1: uh uh Joe?

550
00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:03,240
Speaker 6: Yes, this is Joe.

551
00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 1: Tell me everything.

552
00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:10,720
Speaker 6: Joe, tell you everything, Tell me everything.

553
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:11,920
Speaker 9: I don't know if you're ready for that.

554
00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,080
Speaker 1: I don't know if you're looking at me right now,

555
00:37:17,200 --> 00:37:20,440
Speaker 1: but I am extremely ready.

556
00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:23,840
Speaker 9: I just closed the stream because it was confusing me.

557
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 6: But I was gonna call to tell you about how

558
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:33,399
Speaker 6: back in high school I got arrested for stealing all

559
00:37:33,400 --> 00:37:39,280
Speaker 6: of our computers and selling them. And now I'm the

560
00:37:39,320 --> 00:37:41,680
Speaker 6: head of it at the company I work for, and

561
00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:47,520
Speaker 6: I feel kind of like a fraud because clearly that's

562
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:49,760
Speaker 6: the conflict. They don't know about that obvious.

563
00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:52,480
Speaker 1: All right, So you stole computers when you were in

564
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:56,040
Speaker 1: school and now you're the head of the IT program.

565
00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:59,880
Speaker 1: That sounds like a good come up story.

566
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:05,080
Speaker 9: So when I was in school, they had this like

567
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 9: fake class. Basically, I got a signed to help the

568
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:13,759
Speaker 9: IT guy at the school, and they gave us all laptops.

569
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:17,359
Speaker 9: So I was like, all right, you know what, I'm

570
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:20,279
Speaker 9: in charge of these. I could steel some of them

571
00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:21,600
Speaker 9: and sell them on the Internet and I.

572
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:22,440
Speaker 6: Could get away with this.

573
00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 9: And I did for a while, and then this kids

574
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:35,760
Speaker 9: who had been gotten in trouble. He basically was like, Hey,

575
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,759
Speaker 9: if you give me some of these computers, I can

576
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:43,759
Speaker 9: sell them on my eBay account, because he had been

577
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 9: breaking into people's houses and stealing all their stuff and

578
00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 9: selling it. I was like, hell, yeah, sounds like a

579
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:53,040
Speaker 9: good idea. So I give them some computers and he

580
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:56,799
Speaker 9: sells them on eBay and I don't know how, but

581
00:38:56,880 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 9: he got caught and then he ratted me out to

582
00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:04,879
Speaker 9: get in less trouble. So then in class one day

583
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:16,080
Speaker 9: the cops came and pulled me out and arrested me. Okay,

584
00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:20,880
Speaker 9: so now I work for this company. This was like

585
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:24,399
Speaker 9: seven years ago. Seven years later. Now I'm the head

586
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:27,040
Speaker 9: of I SEE at this company, and I'm responsible for

587
00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:32,520
Speaker 9: hundreds of computers unlimited access.

588
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great it's a great hero story. I

589
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:38,560
Speaker 1: don't know why you feel like an impostor what is?

590
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:38,880
Speaker 6: Uh?

591
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:40,560
Speaker 1: What is what is making you feel that way?

592
00:39:43,040 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 6: I don't know.

593
00:39:43,680 --> 00:39:46,920
Speaker 9: It's just like I also don't have any sort of

594
00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:50,480
Speaker 9: education or experience. Well, I do have experience. I'm really

595
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:56,279
Speaker 9: good with computers. But it's just crazy to me, like, like,

596
00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:59,279
Speaker 9: how has this happened? Like when I got arrested, I

597
00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:02,319
Speaker 9: thought my life is over. I started selling drugs. I

598
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,960
Speaker 9: moved down at my parents' house when I was like seventeen.

599
00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:12,160
Speaker 9: My life went like really downhill after that, but somehow

600
00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 9: I turned it around. I don't even know how it happened.

601
00:40:16,160 --> 00:40:19,640
Speaker 1: M Okay, so you should feel good about this. I

602
00:40:19,680 --> 00:40:23,799
Speaker 1: don't understand why you feel like like an imposter. Here's

603
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:26,040
Speaker 1: the thing. Here's the thing that I'm gonna tell you, Joe.

604
00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 1: Is you know you're in this I position where and

605
00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 1: you said you don't have formal training? Is that what

606
00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 1: you said?

607
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:38,359
Speaker 9: I have no education, but I do have a lot

608
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:41,440
Speaker 9: of experience, like I'm a computer wizard.

609
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:47,480
Speaker 1: Well then, dude, you you know, knowing how to do

610
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,480
Speaker 1: things is so much better than having a piece of

611
00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 1: paper that claims that you know how to do things.

612
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:57,600
Speaker 1: You know, I went to I went to school with

613
00:40:57,920 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 1: UH and I went to film school. I know plenty

614
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:03,600
Speaker 1: of people who graduated from film school that have fucking

615
00:41:03,640 --> 00:41:05,959
Speaker 1: absolutely no idea what they're doing, and I know plenty

616
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:08,479
Speaker 1: of people who dropped out that know what they're doing.

617
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:10,279
Speaker 1: I mean, school is just a scam to get you

618
00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 1: to spend you know, hundreds of thousands of dollars for

619
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:17,040
Speaker 1: just for no reason. I mean, who gives a fucking

620
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:19,120
Speaker 1: shit at all whether or not you have an education.

621
00:41:19,800 --> 00:41:23,160
Speaker 1: You know how to do the thing. That's the most

622
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:28,759
Speaker 1: important part. Joe, Joe, I think you're more impressive not

623
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:32,960
Speaker 1: having had an education, because you got to where you

624
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:38,600
Speaker 1: are through sheer force of will. You know, it wasn't

625
00:41:38,640 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: like your dad worked at the fucking company and you

626
00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:43,360
Speaker 1: know he paid for you to school, and then you

627
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:48,040
Speaker 1: did the thing. I mean, you wield yourself upon the

628
00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:54,000
Speaker 1: universe and the universe bent, and you know now you're here.

629
00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:58,680
Speaker 1: So I think you should only feel pride about that.

630
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:04,520
Speaker 9: I feel like part of it is that if they

631
00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:07,880
Speaker 9: did know I have been arrested for that, I would

632
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:10,640
Speaker 9: never have made it here. Not in a million year

633
00:42:10,760 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 9: is actually you can't even get hired at the company

634
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:18,320
Speaker 9: if you have any sort of theft on your record.

635
00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 1: Do you have a theft on.

636
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:25,239
Speaker 9: Okay, here's the christ So I had to do this thing.

637
00:42:25,400 --> 00:42:28,680
Speaker 9: It was basically I was basically on probation, so I

638
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:32,759
Speaker 9: had to like attend all these classes, do all these

639
00:42:32,840 --> 00:42:36,959
Speaker 9: drug tests, do all this community service. And the goal

640
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:40,160
Speaker 9: was once you're done doing all of the you know,

641
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:42,640
Speaker 9: all the requirements of the program, it's supposed to get

642
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:45,879
Speaker 9: expunged from your record. Okay, Well, I got taught trying

643
00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:49,359
Speaker 9: to take a drug test, which is a felony, and

644
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:54,800
Speaker 9: they basically kicked me out of the program. And then

645
00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 9: I don't know how my lawyer did it, but he

646
00:42:57,640 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 9: somehow got me back into the program. I never got

647
00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 9: in trouble for faking the drug.

648
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:07,759
Speaker 1: Test, Okay. So okay, so just yesterday did it. Did

649
00:43:07,800 --> 00:43:11,319
Speaker 1: it eventually get expunged from your from your from your

650
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 1: from your record.

651
00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:17,520
Speaker 9: It must have, because when they did the background check

652
00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:19,480
Speaker 9: on me, it all came back hunky dory.

653
00:43:20,640 --> 00:43:22,880
Speaker 1: Okay, So you're not allowed to work there if you

654
00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 1: have a theft on your record. You do not have

655
00:43:25,160 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 1: a theft on your record and you work there.

656
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,520
Speaker 9: I just don't see how it's not on my record though,

657
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,080
Speaker 9: Like what, like why.

658
00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 7: Is it not there?

659
00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:38,839
Speaker 1: But it doesn't matter, it's not it's not on.

660
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:42,640
Speaker 6: There, I guess.

661
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:46,719
Speaker 1: So we're trying to pick out I'm let's well, let's

662
00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:49,280
Speaker 1: get into the thoughts, and we're getting granular with events,

663
00:43:49,320 --> 00:43:51,120
Speaker 1: and events are fine and all, but let's I want

664
00:43:51,160 --> 00:43:56,960
Speaker 1: your thoughts, Joe. Why are you feeling like an impostor here?

665
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:06,759
Speaker 9: Because I basically lied and still somehow managed to get

666
00:44:06,760 --> 00:44:10,200
Speaker 9: into this position and I wasn't hired for that position.

667
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:12,040
Speaker 9: I worked my way up in the company.

668
00:44:13,040 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 1: Okay, what do you lie as you were working your

669
00:44:16,520 --> 00:44:16,920
Speaker 1: way up?

670
00:44:19,800 --> 00:44:21,480
Speaker 9: I mean I lied about getting arrested?

671
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:23,719
Speaker 1: Okay, did you lie about anything else?

672
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 7: No?

673
00:44:28,960 --> 00:44:30,800
Speaker 9: I'm actually a really honest person.

674
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:33,839
Speaker 1: Okay, as you worked your way up into the company,

675
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:36,319
Speaker 1: as as as you as you worked, as you worked

676
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:41,000
Speaker 1: your way up in the company, did you perform tasks

677
00:44:41,040 --> 00:44:44,720
Speaker 1: and complete operations that were of benefit to the company

678
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:47,920
Speaker 1: and of benefit to other people that worked there, and

679
00:44:47,960 --> 00:44:52,919
Speaker 1: of benefit to the people that employed you. Yeah?

680
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:56,120
Speaker 9: I was one hundred percent the highest performer and everything

681
00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:59,640
Speaker 9: I did was like fucking perfect for them.

682
00:44:59,719 --> 00:45:02,600
Speaker 1: Okay, of course it was, because that's why they promoted you.

683
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:07,160
Speaker 1: And when you got promoted, did you then slide into

684
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:11,880
Speaker 1: your new role further providing benefits to your employer, to

685
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:15,799
Speaker 1: your coworkers, and to the person that promoted you.

686
00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:21,200
Speaker 9: Yeah, I kind of did everything perfectly.

687
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 1: To be honest, Okay. And now in your current role,

688
00:45:25,320 --> 00:45:31,200
Speaker 1: do you provide benefits to your company, to your employers,

689
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:35,360
Speaker 1: to people who use the services of your company, and

690
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 1: to the people that have put you in your position? Okay?

691
00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:45,880
Speaker 1: So then nobody gives two shits about if you stole

692
00:45:46,000 --> 00:45:50,600
Speaker 1: laptops when you were in high school. That doesn't matter.

693
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:55,800
Speaker 1: All that matters is you are providing benefit to your company,

694
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:57,560
Speaker 1: to the people you work with, to the person that

695
00:45:57,680 --> 00:45:59,919
Speaker 1: hired you, and to the people who use the servi

696
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:03,560
Speaker 1: versus in products of your company. And of course, if

697
00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:04,319
Speaker 1: you're enjoying your.

698
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:08,080
Speaker 9: Do you want to know what is important?

699
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:08,920
Speaker 1: Please?

700
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 9: I want one hundred percent learned my lesson and I

701
00:46:15,719 --> 00:46:18,400
Speaker 9: would not feel a single thing ever again.

702
00:46:25,160 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 1: So why do you still feel like an impostor? You

703
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:35,120
Speaker 1: shouldn't feel like an impostor your past year It doesn't matter.

704
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:40,959
Speaker 9: Already, good, well, good, The way you've kind of put

705
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:44,879
Speaker 9: things have been pretty good. Like, regardless of what I've

706
00:46:44,880 --> 00:46:49,080
Speaker 9: done in my past, I'm still doing an outstanding job

707
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:52,319
Speaker 9: for them. So you know, as long as I don't

708
00:46:52,360 --> 00:46:58,240
Speaker 9: get any sort of temptations or whatever, then I should

709
00:46:58,239 --> 00:46:58,720
Speaker 9: be okay.

710
00:47:00,239 --> 00:47:02,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. I don't think that what you did

711
00:47:02,960 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 1: in I mean, I don't think that anything matters other

712
00:47:06,760 --> 00:47:10,440
Speaker 1: than the things that we've talked about, that you are

713
00:47:11,560 --> 00:47:14,960
Speaker 1: providing value to people in your role, which it sounds

714
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:17,240
Speaker 1: like you are, and which you gave me extremely confident

715
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:21,239
Speaker 1: answers about. So clearly the confidence that you have in

716
00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 1: your role is within you. I mean you you gave

717
00:47:24,080 --> 00:47:27,560
Speaker 1: it up immediately when I asked you. You said yes,

718
00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:31,560
Speaker 1: you said one hundred percent, you said definitely. So next

719
00:47:31,600 --> 00:47:37,080
Speaker 1: time you're feeling like an impostor, ask yourself the questions

720
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:41,600
Speaker 1: that I just asked you and resurface those gut reactions

721
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,120
Speaker 1: that you gave when I asked you, the questions that

722
00:47:44,280 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 1: reinforced the fact that you actually are good at the

723
00:47:47,920 --> 00:47:59,439
Speaker 1: things that you do. Hell yeah, dude, Joe, everything I said,

724
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:02,719
Speaker 1: Oh sorry, go ahead.

725
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:05,440
Speaker 9: I was gonna tell you that I know that you

726
00:48:05,560 --> 00:48:09,560
Speaker 9: don't like when people are like driving, so I pulled

727
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:12,400
Speaker 9: over so I could talk to you. And this is

728
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:15,600
Speaker 9: also the first time I've ever called you, which is

729
00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:18,279
Speaker 9: like miraculous to me. I can't believe I got through

730
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:18,600
Speaker 9: to you.

731
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:23,920
Speaker 1: Well, Joff, thank you for calling and sharing. And uh,

732
00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:27,919
Speaker 1: I hope that in the future you feel better about

733
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:30,760
Speaker 1: yourself because there's there's no reason for you to define

734
00:48:30,760 --> 00:48:32,880
Speaker 1: yourself by the past. If it's if it's really not

735
00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:33,720
Speaker 1: relevant anymore.

736
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:38,000
Speaker 9: You said that if I didn't need to tell the people,

737
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:42,040
Speaker 9: what I would say is you've got one life, so

738
00:48:43,560 --> 00:48:47,040
Speaker 9: don't regret anything and just shoot your shot. And also

739
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,279
Speaker 9: I don't mind being on your podcast.

740
00:48:51,320 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling job. Thanks, Hello, Hello, what's up?

741
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:05,359
Speaker 6: Uh?

742
00:49:05,800 --> 00:49:06,960
Speaker 3: Just vibing.

743
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:16,399
Speaker 1: Vibing. Vibe is such a it's such a word. It's

744
00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:18,439
Speaker 1: I feel like it's a very popular word now.

745
00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:21,840
Speaker 3: It is everyone's about the aesthetic.

746
00:49:23,520 --> 00:49:26,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's one of you know how like I mean,

747
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:30,680
Speaker 1: it's kind of become like a post ironic thing that

748
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 1: it gets used so much that it's become what's the

749
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:41,759
Speaker 1: word chougee? Is that a word people use? It's become

750
00:49:41,840 --> 00:49:48,120
Speaker 1: a little choogy. But some of these things that become

751
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:52,840
Speaker 1: made fun. Vibe it is a good word. It describes

752
00:49:53,040 --> 00:49:57,200
Speaker 1: a lot of things that are hard to describe with

753
00:49:57,320 --> 00:50:04,200
Speaker 1: other words. It perfectly in cap slates the thing that

754
00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:08,080
Speaker 1: I mean. That's what a word does. Is it summons

755
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:14,440
Speaker 1: a vibe? It does, and the vibe is the perfect

756
00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 1: word for vibe. So I don't we don't. I mean,

757
00:50:20,120 --> 00:50:21,839
Speaker 1: we can make fun of it, but it is. It's

758
00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:23,080
Speaker 1: a useful word.

759
00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:26,839
Speaker 3: Yes, I have to agree it very much.

760
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:35,000
Speaker 1: Is What is your name? Ali Alie? What's going on?

761
00:50:35,040 --> 00:50:35,320
Speaker 4: Allie?

762
00:50:38,080 --> 00:50:40,600
Speaker 3: I'm here to tell you a little story.

763
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:42,520
Speaker 1: Okay?

764
00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:43,640
Speaker 8: Uh?

765
00:50:43,680 --> 00:50:45,360
Speaker 1: What how does the story start?

766
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:50,520
Speaker 3: Okay, so it starts with a house? Do I put this?

767
00:50:50,560 --> 00:50:53,000
Speaker 3: It's important to know it's hard for you to know

768
00:50:53,560 --> 00:50:57,320
Speaker 3: that I am a plus sized lady. All right, I'm chonky,

769
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,520
Speaker 3: I'm curvaceous, flabulous. How you want to go about it.

770
00:51:02,320 --> 00:51:04,880
Speaker 3: That's important to note because it definitely comes into playing

771
00:51:04,920 --> 00:51:08,720
Speaker 3: the story. So years ago, when I was on Bumble,

772
00:51:09,560 --> 00:51:12,160
Speaker 3: I was swiping around, you know, whatever you do on

773
00:51:12,280 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 3: dating app, and I'm atchure the guy who was pretty cute.

774
00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:16,800
Speaker 3: You know, I was like, oh, kind of surprised that

775
00:51:16,880 --> 00:51:20,080
Speaker 3: he slipts right, because you know, like fat boy types

776
00:51:20,160 --> 00:51:22,960
Speaker 3: usually don't slept right on me, but all right, Colbins,

777
00:51:23,640 --> 00:51:27,360
Speaker 3: don't we start talking and he's like, oh, you're so petite.

778
00:51:27,560 --> 00:51:30,480
Speaker 3: You're just so cute and so little. And I'm like, okay,

779
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:35,520
Speaker 3: So he's being an asshole clearly because like obviously I'm not.

780
00:51:36,080 --> 00:51:37,799
Speaker 3: And so I'm like, okay, what's your game like If

781
00:51:37,800 --> 00:51:40,279
Speaker 3: you're just gonna bully me, I'm gonna a match with you.

782
00:51:40,680 --> 00:51:42,560
Speaker 3: And he's like, no, no, no, no no. I just

783
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:46,440
Speaker 3: like for my girls to usually be a side like thirty.

784
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:51,400
Speaker 3: And I was like, oh no, you're just a theater

785
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:55,360
Speaker 3: all right. Well back what I was like, I'm not interested,

786
00:51:55,640 --> 00:51:57,879
Speaker 3: and find the way that I am. Thank you very much,

787
00:51:59,239 --> 00:52:02,239
Speaker 3: I'm good, and then I'm bumbling. You can send pictures,

788
00:52:02,400 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 3: so it sends me a picture or he send me

789
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:06,680
Speaker 3: a picture and he's like, yeah, this is my ex,

790
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:09,160
Speaker 3: so it'd be awesome if you could look like her

791
00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:09,800
Speaker 3: and I'd help.

792
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:11,080
Speaker 1: You get and.

793
00:52:12,920 --> 00:52:15,120
Speaker 3: I'm like, what the hell? So I look at this

794
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:18,200
Speaker 3: picture and I'm and he has the girl's face scratched out,

795
00:52:18,239 --> 00:52:20,279
Speaker 3: so I don't know what she looks like. And it

796
00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:22,560
Speaker 3: was probably shitty of me to screenshot the picture, but

797
00:52:22,640 --> 00:52:24,359
Speaker 3: I said it to my friend and was like Oh

798
00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:26,880
Speaker 3: my god, look at what this man's trying. So you

799
00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:28,840
Speaker 3: want see to be like this, Like what the hell Like, man,

800
00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:31,360
Speaker 3: I'm either too fat or I'm not sad enough, what

801
00:52:31,480 --> 00:52:33,799
Speaker 3: the hell's going on? It's all like, Okay, how'd I say?

802
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:36,840
Speaker 3: Guy block and go on? Well, like a year and

803
00:52:36,840 --> 00:52:39,840
Speaker 3: a half later, one of my friends texts me in

804
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:41,799
Speaker 3: the middle of night. I'm dog sitting by myself at

805
00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:43,960
Speaker 3: this place, and she's like, what was the name of

806
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:46,680
Speaker 3: that dude that said he wanted to make you bigger

807
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:48,759
Speaker 3: or whatever? And I was like, oh, it was like

808
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:51,840
Speaker 3: I don't know, Kyle or something like that. And she

809
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:54,120
Speaker 3: was like, oh, that's weird because the guy looks just

810
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:56,800
Speaker 3: like him. Is on the trailer for this new show

811
00:52:56,840 --> 00:53:00,120
Speaker 3: on CLC called Hot and Heavy, and I was like,

812
00:53:00,239 --> 00:53:02,200
Speaker 3: you're joking and I was like, I can't beat him,

813
00:53:02,200 --> 00:53:05,080
Speaker 3: and she's like, well, no, no, And so I watched

814
00:53:05,080 --> 00:53:09,040
Speaker 3: the trailer we live on FaceTime with her, and it's

815
00:53:09,080 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 3: the fucking guy, but he has a different name and

816
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:14,040
Speaker 3: the girl he's put on the show is the girl

817
00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:16,040
Speaker 3: from the picture, like I can tell from her hair

818
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:20,520
Speaker 3: and like part of the trailer and I'm like, oh

819
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 3: my god. So yeah, I just this is what it's

820
00:53:26,120 --> 00:53:28,240
Speaker 3: like to be a plus sized woman in the world

821
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:31,960
Speaker 3: doing dating things. But also it's just that's a little cringe.

822
00:53:32,400 --> 00:53:34,040
Speaker 3: It happens, and that.

823
00:53:34,200 --> 00:53:37,840
Speaker 1: What is the show? What is hot and heavy about?

824
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:43,400
Speaker 3: Well, it's was canceled, but because there was a lot

825
00:53:43,440 --> 00:53:45,200
Speaker 3: of backlash.

826
00:53:45,239 --> 00:53:47,719
Speaker 1: Okay, is it can I guess? Is this about like

827
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:52,680
Speaker 1: is this like a reality show about like U plus

828
00:53:52,719 --> 00:53:54,160
Speaker 1: sized couples or something.

829
00:53:55,880 --> 00:53:59,439
Speaker 3: It's about kurby couple with curry women or plus size

830
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:03,040
Speaker 3: women with usually skinnier guys that will either out of

831
00:54:03,040 --> 00:54:03,959
Speaker 3: the girls league.

832
00:54:05,080 --> 00:54:10,759
Speaker 1: Okay, sounds like that sounds like the perfect show for

833
00:54:10,840 --> 00:54:11,839
Speaker 1: that guy to be on.

834
00:54:13,360 --> 00:54:15,759
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, he was clearly in hog Heaven. It was

835
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:17,239
Speaker 3: just so funny cause he like, this is my ex

836
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:19,239
Speaker 3: and the picture obviously that was a while back when

837
00:54:19,239 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 3: you sent me that. But then like they're like engaged

838
00:54:21,680 --> 00:54:23,600
Speaker 3: to be married on the show, and I'm like, this

839
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:26,799
Speaker 3: is just wild my dog's bullet So I was like,

840
00:54:26,840 --> 00:54:29,920
Speaker 3: oh my god, like what the hell? This world is

841
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:32,400
Speaker 3: too small? And yeah, the show was canceled literally, I

842
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:34,680
Speaker 3: think after like three episodes because everyone looks like this

843
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:35,520
Speaker 3: is messed up.

844
00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:40,000
Speaker 1: Are you still doing the bumbles? And the tinders and whatnot.

845
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:42,000
Speaker 1: Have you eventually found.

846
00:54:43,920 --> 00:54:46,440
Speaker 3: No, actually the fiance now, so all is well. He

847
00:54:46,520 --> 00:54:50,080
Speaker 3: is very normal in a sense. I'm not setishizing big woman.

848
00:54:50,080 --> 00:54:52,000
Speaker 4: But yeah, it was.

849
00:54:52,239 --> 00:54:58,960
Speaker 3: I went through a lot of weird bullshits on dating Appskay.

850
00:54:57,160 --> 00:54:59,880
Speaker 1: I have a question. I'm very curious from your perspective,

851
00:55:00,040 --> 00:55:06,399
Speaker 1: what what to you is the line between somebody who

852
00:55:07,200 --> 00:55:12,440
Speaker 1: you know prefers bigger woman to somebody who fetishizes them.

853
00:55:12,480 --> 00:55:14,760
Speaker 1: What is it? What is the line to you between

854
00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:15,560
Speaker 1: a preference and a.

855
00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:21,920
Speaker 3: Fetish Ooh, I mean, because like it's literally the whole

856
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 3: whole life. I've been toying the line of like, oh,

857
00:55:24,239 --> 00:55:26,440
Speaker 3: do I want someone to like me because they're like, oh,

858
00:55:26,560 --> 00:55:31,239
Speaker 3: you have beautiful curves and whatever, versus like someone who

859
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:33,920
Speaker 3: wants to make me five hundred pounds or whatever and

860
00:55:33,920 --> 00:55:37,840
Speaker 3: get off six hundred pounds lives. And I think the

861
00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:42,759
Speaker 3: biggest line is like how you talk about someone's body,

862
00:55:42,760 --> 00:55:44,520
Speaker 3: because like my fiance, he's like, oh, yeah, I love

863
00:55:44,560 --> 00:55:49,120
Speaker 3: your curves woo, and he'll like compliment me and be like, oh,

864
00:55:49,160 --> 00:55:52,280
Speaker 3: you're just beautiful whatever. Like he's seeing me like smaller

865
00:55:52,320 --> 00:55:54,200
Speaker 3: than I am now. And the guys that I am now.

866
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:57,920
Speaker 3: But the worst about like the guys who are totally

867
00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:01,359
Speaker 3: fetishizing me, is usually a common of like, uh yeah,

868
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:04,800
Speaker 3: I love those like, oh, I of how thick you are, girl,

869
00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:07,160
Speaker 3: Like I want you to be like I will buy

870
00:56:07,200 --> 00:56:09,279
Speaker 3: you whatever you want at the restaurant, like on dates.

871
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:11,799
Speaker 3: I've been told that. I'm like, do you think I'm

872
00:56:11,800 --> 00:56:14,759
Speaker 3: gonna sit here in bang as An? Oh, Charlie's like

873
00:56:14,800 --> 00:56:18,640
Speaker 3: that's not happening. So I guess it's a way of

874
00:56:18,719 --> 00:56:21,440
Speaker 3: like however they approach it, if it's a I don't know,

875
00:56:21,680 --> 00:56:24,760
Speaker 3: it's weird.

876
00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:26,680
Speaker 1: Interesting, it sounds like it's a it's a very subtle

877
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:29,400
Speaker 1: yet clear difference.

878
00:56:30,600 --> 00:56:30,880
Speaker 8: It is.

879
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:33,360
Speaker 3: It's really not until I go back to the vibe

880
00:56:33,360 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 3: like at the beginning of the thing.

881
00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 4: But people have vibes.

882
00:56:35,760 --> 00:56:40,200
Speaker 3: He even tells your chest, like what what someone compliments first, like,

883
00:56:40,280 --> 00:56:43,040
Speaker 3: of course, like whatever my fiance describes what they feel

884
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:46,960
Speaker 3: likes about me. It's oh, well, like you're smart, you're funny,

885
00:56:47,040 --> 00:56:49,759
Speaker 3: you care about people, blah blah blah. Also you have

886
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:52,840
Speaker 3: massive boobs, so a great hips, you know, But like

887
00:56:52,920 --> 00:56:54,520
Speaker 3: that's not one of the first things that comes to mind.

888
00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:56,680
Speaker 3: Where other guys have days they're like, God, I just

889
00:56:56,719 --> 00:56:59,440
Speaker 3: can't get enough of that body, and I'm like what

890
00:56:59,480 --> 00:57:04,960
Speaker 3: about this? Like what about her? So that's really the

891
00:57:04,960 --> 00:57:05,720
Speaker 3: main difference.

892
00:57:06,360 --> 00:57:11,320
Speaker 1: Do you have any preferences or fetishes yourself?

893
00:57:15,880 --> 00:57:20,040
Speaker 3: Not really, I just like whoever because I'm not straight,

894
00:57:20,160 --> 00:57:23,800
Speaker 3: So if I vibe with someone I don't know, I

895
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:26,440
Speaker 3: guess just I like people for who they are, and

896
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:30,880
Speaker 3: then body stuff and sexual stuff comes later there.

897
00:57:33,400 --> 00:57:36,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, will you said that? You you said you're you're

898
00:57:37,640 --> 00:57:41,040
Speaker 1: not straight. You just vibe with whoever it is. I

899
00:57:41,080 --> 00:57:44,720
Speaker 1: think I think demisexual is the word for that, right.

900
00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:47,440
Speaker 1: I always thought demisexual meant you were like attracted to

901
00:57:47,560 --> 00:57:51,680
Speaker 1: like a godlike people or something like that, because the

902
00:57:51,720 --> 00:57:54,080
Speaker 1: only other time I heard the word demi is is

903
00:57:54,120 --> 00:57:57,520
Speaker 1: with the word demigods or I thought that they were related.

904
00:57:57,640 --> 00:58:01,920
Speaker 3: But yeah, yeah, I thought that too, And so I

905
00:58:02,080 --> 00:58:03,920
Speaker 3: was like, I am a leo. I have enough of

906
00:58:03,960 --> 00:58:07,000
Speaker 3: an ego myself. I don't need that, So no bugs

907
00:58:07,880 --> 00:58:10,240
Speaker 3: to know people first, and then like certain things about

908
00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:12,280
Speaker 3: them become hotter what they get to know them, and

909
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:15,080
Speaker 3: you know, and them bodies are hot. So I guess

910
00:58:15,120 --> 00:58:18,200
Speaker 3: it sounds creepy, but anyway, yeah.

911
00:58:17,560 --> 00:58:19,600
Speaker 1: Well listen and I have. I have a one final

912
00:58:19,680 --> 00:58:23,160
Speaker 1: question before we go. Did you watch the show? Like,

913
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:25,040
Speaker 1: I know you said you saw the trailer, but like,

914
00:58:26,120 --> 00:58:28,120
Speaker 1: come on, you had to have watched the episode he

915
00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:28,520
Speaker 1: was in.

916
00:58:30,920 --> 00:58:32,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, they didn't. I didn't watch a full episode, but

917
00:58:33,120 --> 00:58:35,920
Speaker 3: like on their Facebook thing TLS, he was posting clips

918
00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:39,520
Speaker 3: of the couples like get meet the couples. I guess whatever.

919
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:40,600
Speaker 9: So I watched.

920
00:58:40,280 --> 00:58:43,720
Speaker 3: Those for the first episode that they did, and it

921
00:58:43,840 --> 00:58:45,120
Speaker 3: was just awesome. It was so weird to do the

922
00:58:45,120 --> 00:58:47,680
Speaker 3: guy's voice for us the first time, because like he

923
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,080
Speaker 3: looked like he'd be like, hey, I'm blah blah blah,

924
00:58:50,080 --> 00:58:52,960
Speaker 3: and I liked six cars, but he sounded like this

925
00:58:53,160 --> 00:58:55,040
Speaker 3: because I think wrong with that. But I was just like,

926
00:58:55,040 --> 00:58:58,280
Speaker 3: oh that your voice is not make that's wild. But

927
00:58:58,320 --> 00:59:00,920
Speaker 3: I did watch that, and you could tell it was

928
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:03,240
Speaker 3: just so contrived and they did not want to actually

929
00:59:03,320 --> 00:59:05,840
Speaker 3: liked each other, and it was just so weird.

930
00:59:07,560 --> 00:59:09,600
Speaker 1: Well, I'm glad to hear it sounds like this call,

931
00:59:09,920 --> 00:59:12,200
Speaker 1: you know, has kind of a happy ending for everyone

932
00:59:12,240 --> 00:59:17,160
Speaker 1: because it sounds like this guy got exactly what he wanted. Uh,

933
00:59:17,400 --> 00:59:21,320
Speaker 1: being on this TV show, you found a fiance that

934
00:59:21,400 --> 00:59:27,000
Speaker 1: you are very satisfied with, and the casting director that

935
00:59:27,120 --> 00:59:32,600
Speaker 1: works for TLC got the perfect guy. So everything worked out.

936
00:59:32,680 --> 00:59:35,280
Speaker 1: Oh very well. Anything else you want to say to

937
00:59:35,280 --> 00:59:40,080
Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go, Alli, I

938
00:59:40,120 --> 00:59:40,480
Speaker 1: don't know.

939
00:59:41,120 --> 00:59:44,200
Speaker 3: I hope y'all have a good week. It's Monday, so

940
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:46,439
Speaker 3: I hope keeps going up and up.

941
00:59:48,040 --> 00:59:49,520
Speaker 1: Time is a flat circle.

942
00:59:49,560 --> 00:59:53,480
Speaker 6: Ali, yes, yes, yes, it is.

943
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:59,840
Speaker 1: Talk to you soon goes on the line, thinks every night,

944
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:03,280
Speaker 1: everythink goes through his eye. Is teaching you to how

945
01:00:03,360 --> 01:00:08,160
Speaker 1: to have your life, but he's not really an expert.