Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,
Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
Speaker 1: tip is that you can prepare in advance for grief anniversaries.
Speaker 1: By proactively planning in things that will lift your spirits,
Speaker 1: you can make the day slightly less rough. I came
Speaker 1: across today's tip because I follow Mary Catherine Hamm's Instagram account.
Speaker 1: This journalist and commentator is known for many things, but
Speaker 1: in addition to her political writing, she has shared a
Speaker 1: lot about losing her first husband seven years ago. He
Speaker 1: died in a bicycle accident, leaving her with one little
Speaker 1: girl and another on the way. In an Instagram reel, recently,
Speaker 1: she talked about this seventh anniversary. The thing about losing
Speaker 1: someone on a particular day, or a traumatic event on
Speaker 1: a particular day, if you have one in your life,
Speaker 1: as you're bound to at some point, is that the
Speaker 1: calendar is going to come back around. She noted when
Speaker 1: that happens, be prepared for it. She went on to say,
Speaker 1: you know the date is coming, you know you're dreading
Speaker 1: it at least early on in your grief, and you
Speaker 1: should set up a situation for yourself Mary Catherine planned
Speaker 1: a nice lunch with several friends on her grief anniversary
Speaker 1: as a way to make sure she had something on
Speaker 1: the day to look forward to instead of just dreading
Speaker 1: the day. I think this is an incredibly wise idea.
Speaker 1: The calendar does come back around again every year we
Speaker 1: note the anniversary of all the days that shaped us,
Speaker 1: and yes, over time, some of the grief changes form.
Speaker 1: Mary Catherine Ham remarried a few years ago and had
Speaker 1: another baby last year, and so I am sure the
Speaker 1: shape of the grief is different than it was in
Speaker 1: the first year, but still whatever shape it takes, it
Speaker 1: will always be there. You are highly unlikely to forget
Speaker 1: the date. Not everyone in your life will remember it
Speaker 1: as you will, and you can't always count on other
Speaker 1: people to observe it and take care of you. You
Speaker 1: need to take care of yourself. So if you've got
Speaker 1: a grief anniversary in your life, think about what truly
Speaker 1: makes you happy. What could you plan into your life
Speaker 1: for that day so that you will feel loved, What
Speaker 1: will make you feel like there are still good things
Speaker 1: in this world. Reach out to your friends. Your closest
Speaker 1: ones will welcome the opportunity to help on that grief anniversary.
Speaker 1: They may want to help, they just probably don't know
Speaker 1: what to do. So think about things that make you smile.
Speaker 1: What would you genuinely enjoy? Get one or two of
Speaker 1: those things on the calendar. What this can do is
Speaker 1: temper some of the dread the day might otherwise conjure up.
Speaker 1: There will be something on that day to look forward to.
Speaker 1: You won't be alone if you don't want to be.
Speaker 1: Life can be tough, especially if you are grieving, but
Speaker 1: figuring out how to spend your grief anniversary in a
Speaker 1: way that will make you feel taken care of is
Speaker 1: one of the best gifts you can give yourself. Then
Speaker 1: you can continue to show up for the other people
Speaker 1: in your life in the meantime. This is Laura. Thanks
Speaker 1: for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you. You can send me
Speaker 1: your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with
Speaker 1: me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod
Speaker 1: that's b E the number four then breakfast Pod. You
Speaker 1: can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast Podcasts
Speaker 1: at iHeartMedia dot com. That Before Breakfast is spelled out
Speaker 1: with all the letters. Thanks so much. Should I look
Speaker 1: forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production
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