WEBVTT - Episode 198: Don't Stop Kegelling (Feat. Rainbow Barris) 0:00:02.520 --> 0:00:05.440 Let's say what's up. What's up is lip Service. I'm 0:00:05.440 --> 0:00:09.040 Angela Yee, I'm Gi McGuire, I'm Stephanie Santiago, and our 0:00:09.080 --> 0:00:13.080 guest Rainbow Barriss, Rainbow Barris is here with us. I 0:00:13.160 --> 0:00:15.080 was just saying that I love lip service has set 0:00:15.120 --> 0:00:17.960 a variety of guests. Last week we had porn start 0:00:18.040 --> 0:00:21.360 shot in there, Lisa Annon. And now we have somebody 0:00:21.400 --> 0:00:23.959 who is a perser in the bedroom for her husband, 0:00:24.120 --> 0:00:30.680 but also an author and acesiologist, a doctor, a mom 0:00:31.280 --> 0:00:34.040 and all of that. So let's give some background on 0:00:34.159 --> 0:00:38.120 who Rainbow barrisses. Um. I think you summed it up 0:00:38.159 --> 0:00:41.239 pretty well. I mean, I think the most important thing 0:00:41.320 --> 0:00:43.320 for me really is being a mom. Um. I do 0:00:43.520 --> 0:00:47.240 have six kids. Um, I've been married a long time 0:00:47.600 --> 0:00:52.400 for especially these days and times. Um. Our oldest just 0:00:52.479 --> 0:00:55.640 turned twenty, same day the baby turned three. So my 0:00:55.760 --> 0:00:58.480 first of my last had the same birthday. Wow, the 0:00:58.600 --> 0:01:04.080 same birthday, same birth And he was like a guy, like, up, 0:01:05.200 --> 0:01:07.840 you're done. Um, And he was two months early on 0:01:07.880 --> 0:01:09.760 her birthday, so I was like, this is really assigned. 0:01:11.000 --> 0:01:16.720 So uh, June ninth. Nice? But oh and they are like, 0:01:18.400 --> 0:01:21.840 I hope today is a good day. You got some 0:01:21.920 --> 0:01:25.680 built in babysitters already best you know, the oldest to 0:01:25.840 --> 0:01:27.880 And when I first got pregnant with the baby, they 0:01:27.920 --> 0:01:29.360 were like, we need to talk to you. And I'm 0:01:29.400 --> 0:01:31.160 like about what They were like, we don't know if 0:01:31.160 --> 0:01:34.640 this is the best thing for you. Would like, no, 0:01:34.760 --> 0:01:38.280 you don't know if it's the best thing for you. Um, 0:01:38.560 --> 0:01:43.039 so you know it's they are built in babysitters and 0:01:43.040 --> 0:01:45.760 and built in arguers and all that. I told him, 0:01:45.760 --> 0:01:46.920 I said, what do you think I had you for? 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:52.120 You know? So it's it's good. It's a good age range. Um. 0:01:52.400 --> 0:01:54.840 And and first we had three girls first, and we 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:58.400 had three boys. Second. Wow, it's like a perfect life perfect. 0:01:59.280 --> 0:02:03.080 Nothing is perfect, but close to it as far as 0:02:03.080 --> 0:02:05.400 the kids, Like, that's kind of dope, like three and 0:02:05.440 --> 0:02:07.600 then three because you know, you have three girls, Like 0:02:07.600 --> 0:02:13.760 I really want a boy exactly. And then and then like, 0:02:13.800 --> 0:02:15.720 oh yeah, we had a boy. That's great, he's happy. 0:02:15.800 --> 0:02:18.160 And then I was like, we'll never have another boy. Well, 0:02:18.160 --> 0:02:19.920 I'm like, won't have any more kids, but if we 0:02:19.960 --> 0:02:22.000 did with a girl and then it was a boy 0:02:22.040 --> 0:02:24.560 and I was like, oh and then we had I'm like, 0:02:25.880 --> 0:02:30.160 this is so interesting. So it is a blessing. So 0:02:30.240 --> 0:02:32.880 let's talk about that. Because the character of Bow I'm 0:02:32.880 --> 0:02:36.080 black Ish is based on you in real life, but 0:02:36.200 --> 0:02:40.960 not completely, but that's basically where the character came from. Yes, correct. 0:02:41.680 --> 0:02:44.160 So sometimes do you get to like know what's going 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:46.600 to happen on the episodes before it happens, Like you 0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:49.720 guys have to sit down discussion, you and your husband Ken. 0:02:49.720 --> 0:02:52.160 You're like, okay, so we're going to discuss this that 0:02:52.200 --> 0:02:54.160 we're gonna tackle this, Like how much input do you 0:02:54.200 --> 0:02:58.280 give based on your real life? Um? Usually I find 0:02:58.320 --> 0:03:02.320 out after, but it depends. I mean if it's something 0:03:02.400 --> 0:03:05.160 tough like um, you know he did. It was a 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:09.800 couple of seasons ago he did, you know, very tough. Um. 0:03:09.800 --> 0:03:12.520 It was the first and only I think arc that 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:14.799 they did. So it was you know, three I think 0:03:14.800 --> 0:03:17.960 episodes and followed each other where bo Andre were having 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:24.240 some uh marital uh differences I guess, and um, he 0:03:24.280 --> 0:03:27.080 had gotten a lot of pushback about like, you know, 0:03:27.240 --> 0:03:29.720 I don't know if you shouldn't do this. People don't 0:03:29.720 --> 0:03:31.720 think this is your life and you know he so 0:03:31.880 --> 0:03:33.800 he did ask me about that, and I was like, 0:03:33.880 --> 0:03:37.320 I absolutely think you should do it. Because you know, 0:03:37.800 --> 0:03:41.200 one of the things that UM, people appreciate about this 0:03:41.240 --> 0:03:43.480 show is that they feel like they can relate to 0:03:43.520 --> 0:03:46.800 these characters. And if you're only showing the positive, then 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:50.960 that's not relatable. And UM, I'm like, so what if 0:03:50.960 --> 0:03:54.600 people think that it's us right now? Like what does 0:03:54.640 --> 0:03:58.880 that matter? You know? Um? We we are examples in 0:03:58.960 --> 0:04:01.880 so many ways for so many couples and so many people, 0:04:02.080 --> 0:04:05.400 And UM, I think it's important to be vulnerable and 0:04:05.480 --> 0:04:09.600 to be honest, even when it's uncomfortable. So um, he 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:12.800 did ask me about that. But other than that, you know, 0:04:13.000 --> 0:04:16.200 I usually find out after. But you know, a lot 0:04:16.240 --> 0:04:18.400 of the stuff is is like oh, I didn't know 0:04:18.400 --> 0:04:21.080 you were gonna write about that. It sometimes also like, 0:04:21.120 --> 0:04:23.520 well that's how you saw it, but I saw it differently, 0:04:23.839 --> 0:04:27.800 absolutely absolutely, because you know, when things happen, we look 0:04:27.839 --> 0:04:30.480 at it differently than they always have our different point 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:34.880 of view, right, and that's we're usually right, we're right, 0:04:35.480 --> 0:04:37.880 my woe man, Just let's me be right. And that's 0:04:37.880 --> 0:04:42.440 his thing, Like he's like, right, how did you get that? 0:04:42.520 --> 0:04:47.080 And you're not even married. I don't know he understands, 0:04:47.279 --> 0:04:49.679 and I think like he probably feels like, well, probably 0:04:49.680 --> 0:04:53.320 because I am, but also because I think he's just 0:04:53.400 --> 0:04:56.320 like we have petty arguments that's not even worth it, 0:04:56.360 --> 0:05:00.240 And usually I am right and probably are right. It's 0:05:00.279 --> 0:05:04.520 not right, it's right true most of them. I feel 0:05:04.520 --> 0:05:06.320 like women are like I look at my sons and 0:05:06.320 --> 0:05:08.600 I look at my daughters, and I'm like, how are 0:05:08.600 --> 0:05:11.039 men in control of the world because they are so 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:14.680 below like like just women just get it in a 0:05:14.760 --> 0:05:20.919 different way, like mediocre, like they're not. They just can't 0:05:20.920 --> 0:05:24.039 reach the level I'm thinking as the same as a woman. 0:05:24.120 --> 0:05:27.119 I'm sorry. If men just don't have it, it's something 0:05:27.200 --> 0:05:29.480 missing with them. I don't know. I think we also 0:05:29.640 --> 0:05:31.440 a lot of times I kind of step back and 0:05:31.520 --> 0:05:35.080 let them. I think we have to be because if 0:05:35.120 --> 0:05:38.120 you let them think of they're in charge, then it's 0:05:38.160 --> 0:05:43.159 like more smooth. But that's another mental tactic on a man. 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:46.240 Yeah no, yeah, because I feel like, yeah, you got it, 0:05:46.400 --> 0:05:51.120 Yeah right, I can't. I can't do that. It's really 0:05:51.160 --> 0:05:53.560 hard and let him do and be like, yeah I 0:05:53.600 --> 0:05:58.359 did that yesterday. But we do sacrifice sometimes. I feel 0:05:58.400 --> 0:06:00.760 like I think being a one man, I think it's 0:06:00.960 --> 0:06:04.960 a sacrifice, but I think it is the best sacrifice 0:06:05.000 --> 0:06:06.760 but I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. 0:06:06.760 --> 0:06:09.360 I think it's such a special gift to be a 0:06:09.440 --> 0:06:12.600 woman and um with all of the challenges and the 0:06:13.200 --> 0:06:16.960 responsibility I think it is. I think it's just so 0:06:17.080 --> 0:06:19.839 powerful and amazing. And we were talking about what we 0:06:19.880 --> 0:06:23.080 do we had a penis for a day, like, what 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:26.720 would that be? Like? Can you imagine what would you 0:06:26.760 --> 0:06:29.159 do if you had a penis for a day? Swinging 0:06:29.200 --> 0:06:34.000 around in the helicopter, in the mirror, in the mirrorge 0:06:34.440 --> 0:06:36.799 in the mircause I gotta see it might get an STD. 0:06:36.839 --> 0:06:38.919 I don't know, I'm right, And then I would just 0:06:38.960 --> 0:06:41.680 go sticking in as many pussies as I can. You 0:06:41.720 --> 0:06:44.640 think you would do an of course I would. I 0:06:44.640 --> 0:06:47.600 would with a female, you know, well, I don't think 0:06:47.600 --> 0:06:50.240 I would be um, you know, I would be a man, 0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:52.159 like I'm thinking if I'm a man, so I don't 0:06:52.200 --> 0:06:54.760 want to be, you know, I just want to him 0:06:54.839 --> 0:07:01.080 regulars like it's not coming out right here. I get 0:07:01.080 --> 0:07:04.839 what she's saying. So I think that sounds right. I 0:07:04.839 --> 0:07:07.080 mean that's what they do anyway, right, they're swinging around 0:07:07.080 --> 0:07:11.560 in the circle in the mirror. Never done it, but 0:07:11.600 --> 0:07:14.679 they do. They do you guys pay helicopter with your penis? 0:07:15.400 --> 0:07:18.640 You've done? My god, look at a little kid when 0:07:18.640 --> 0:07:21.360 you realize that the dangled and hanged and swung like 0:07:21.480 --> 0:07:24.800 a pendulum. You shoot that. Don't act like you don't 0:07:24.840 --> 0:07:26.920 do it at these ones when when they get older, 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:29.000 Look do they do it? No? See, they probably don't 0:07:29.040 --> 0:07:33.000 do it as adult. They won't admit it, especially if 0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:35.320 it's long. I can't lu So you guys really swing 0:07:35.360 --> 0:07:39.160 your like the elephant trunk? What did I say? You're like, 0:07:39.520 --> 0:07:41.680 I'm sorry, there's some guys in the room. Do you 0:07:41.720 --> 0:07:43.760 guys play with your balls when you masturbate or just 0:07:43.840 --> 0:07:51.520 the penis? That's a good question. I'm really like when 0:07:51.560 --> 0:08:00.320 we like, you like rush your balls? You're saying yes, okay, yes, 0:08:00.360 --> 0:08:03.600 oh yes, no, yes, I no, no, okay, So you 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:08.720 don't like can you imagine if you walked in and 0:08:08.840 --> 0:08:12.280 you're a man like fingering himself in the butt and okay, 0:08:12.360 --> 0:08:17.920 oh my god, and take it to the next level, 0:08:19.920 --> 0:08:25.840 like right? Why did you call me? Right? Do you 0:08:26.240 --> 0:08:32.520 for you think guys would want to have a vagina 0:08:32.559 --> 0:08:33.960 for a day to see what it feels like? You 0:08:33.960 --> 0:08:35.520 think we just would like to have a penis for 0:08:35.559 --> 0:08:37.600 a day. I would like to have a penis for 0:08:37.600 --> 0:08:39.160 a day. You wouldn't want to have a penis for 0:08:39.320 --> 0:08:42.559 no I would wake up like, oh my god, right, 0:08:43.200 --> 0:08:45.640 we're gonna go through. That would be a good movie. 0:08:45.640 --> 0:08:48.480 They always do wake up as a kid, right, So 0:08:48.640 --> 0:08:54.920 you like switched like breaky Friday Friday. Yeah, you know 0:08:55.200 --> 0:08:58.040 you're gonna have it a hard day with that change 0:08:58.280 --> 0:09:00.079 if you know it's only for a day. If it 0:09:00.280 --> 0:09:01.800 was only for a day, I'm like, all right, I'm 0:09:01.840 --> 0:09:03.920 just gonna stay in the house and smoke weed and 0:09:04.120 --> 0:09:07.120 just wait to wait it out. Yeah, I'm gonna master mead, 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:13.880 That's exactly what I'm gonna I'm gonna master. I don't 0:09:13.920 --> 0:09:19.800 have today exactly. Like, pens are fascinating, Like how often 0:09:19.800 --> 0:09:22.040 do you find yourself like playing with your man's penis 0:09:22.080 --> 0:09:24.680 just like alive and they hate for you to test 0:09:24.720 --> 0:09:33.320 it when they're not hard? I don't so ashamed are 0:09:33.320 --> 0:09:37.240 you doing? And had an exit I such the penis 0:09:37.280 --> 0:09:38.640 like this, and he got so mad at me, like, 0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:46.000 don't be with the ferny, Like are you trying to 0:09:46.000 --> 0:09:50.920 see how big it is? I want you to use 0:09:50.920 --> 0:09:52.520 the whole hand because if you're not using the whole hand. 0:09:52.520 --> 0:09:54.720 They don't feel manly if you use just the finger. 0:09:54.920 --> 0:10:03.200 And the dumb was just a heart attack. I would 0:10:03.200 --> 0:10:07.160 have had the grap his penis like this. Yeah, really, yeah, 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:12.360 I've heard about those. I've only heard about about you 0:10:12.760 --> 0:10:14.840 never had to witness it. Okay, let's just say I 0:10:14.880 --> 0:10:17.679 had a lot of annal sex during that relationship because 0:10:17.679 --> 0:10:30.480 I had to feel that. I'm sorry, but wow, where 0:10:30.480 --> 0:10:35.320 am I? Yeah? I have like so many questions for 0:10:35.440 --> 0:10:38.120 you guys. So you're sending in a committed relationship for 0:10:38.160 --> 0:10:41.280 such a lot. So that's why I'm like, wow, So like, 0:10:41.360 --> 0:10:43.520 does everybody have ain't no, even if you're not married, 0:10:43.640 --> 0:10:45.560 Like is that I've never had? You know, I don't 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:48.840 do an't know either. I might try, It's too painful. 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:51.560 I can't do it. I tried to, it never went 0:10:51.559 --> 0:10:53.800 all the way in. I wanted to. But you know what, 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:55.559 and I learned this from Lisa and the porn star 0:10:55.600 --> 0:10:57.480 who was here last week. She said, when you clench 0:10:57.520 --> 0:10:59.679 your teeth, it makes your buck clench. So if you 0:10:59.720 --> 0:11:03.280 were like ya, why couldn't sept you that? Because when 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:06.200 you have a pap smere if you clench your upper body. 0:11:06.320 --> 0:11:10.160 Then your vagina clenches, and so it's good to put 0:11:10.240 --> 0:11:12.920 your arms up because it makes you relax. I never 0:11:13.000 --> 0:11:15.440 do that way, so we gotta add that to our list. 0:11:17.360 --> 0:11:19.600 If you put your arms out, you're like this, it's 0:11:19.640 --> 0:11:21.679 harder for you to like, you know, because your whole 0:11:21.679 --> 0:11:23.400 body will be doing this. But when your arms are 0:11:23.440 --> 0:11:25.360 like this, you could do this. So you put your 0:11:25.440 --> 0:11:28.160 arms up and then if you breathe and then it's 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:36.400 easier and any way to do an then probably need 0:11:36.520 --> 0:11:40.960 to use loose for anal as opposed to water base 0:11:41.040 --> 0:11:46.760 water base because it's more slippery. I've done anal or 0:11:46.920 --> 0:11:50.280 like if guys would like average sized phoenises, but it 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:54.640 just so happens like the more recent relationships, like I 0:11:54.760 --> 0:11:58.600 wouldn't even thank god, never like thank god, you don't 0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:01.719 even have to Yeah exactly, they don't even like it 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:04.440 because they've never been able to get it because it's 0:12:04.480 --> 0:12:08.400 just too it's uncomfortable. Yeah, so yeah, I don't know. Yeah, 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:12.520 I feel like I was young when I wasn't married, 0:12:12.559 --> 0:12:15.959 but I was I was prudish. I mean i'm not now, 0:12:17.840 --> 0:12:19.880 but before I'm like, maybe it was just young. So 0:12:20.000 --> 0:12:22.240 I'm gonna have been like you want to do what? Yeah, 0:12:22.240 --> 0:12:24.559 because it does sound more shocking when you're young. I'm 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:26.120 gonna tell you this that I went to public school 0:12:26.120 --> 0:12:27.800 and I went to private school for high school. Right, 0:12:28.040 --> 0:12:30.400 public school, nobody was doing that. But in private school, 0:12:31.080 --> 0:12:34.079 were you a white girls? Yeah, that's my private school was. 0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:36.319 And then I remember this one white girl was like, 0:12:36.400 --> 0:12:37.880 oh my god, and then he put it in my 0:12:38.000 --> 0:12:40.400 butt and I was bleeding, you know, and I was like, 0:12:41.640 --> 0:12:44.719 I didn't even know I had anything about that. I 0:12:44.760 --> 0:12:49.160 didn't either, I literally I didn't. I didn't even get 0:12:49.240 --> 0:12:52.000 it in the wood. And taking it in the mouth 0:12:52.120 --> 0:12:55.080 and still seeing the day were virgins. That's that's crazy. 0:12:55.200 --> 0:12:59.319 That's actually it's actually very scary because that's how a 0:12:59.400 --> 0:13:02.559 lot of bad things happened to people. And they, you know, 0:13:03.760 --> 0:13:06.679 my my little Dominican friends, they were taking it in 0:13:06.760 --> 0:13:10.760 the ass and not keeping their pussy aversion when I 0:13:10.920 --> 0:13:13.679 was a kid, really yeah, my little Dominican friends. And 0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:16.240 they were younger than me. I remember I was like thirteen, 0:13:16.360 --> 0:13:21.439 she was like eleven, and they were little kids, and 0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:25.080 her boyfriend was like fourteen, Oh my god, and they 0:13:25.120 --> 0:13:27.920 were having anal sex. But how do you even know 0:13:28.080 --> 0:13:30.040 about that when you're that. That's when I said, I'm 0:13:30.120 --> 0:13:34.920 like what I was like, what, like, why are you 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:40.440 guys so horny? But trying to make someone else happy? 0:13:41.200 --> 0:13:43.480 So I don't know, I know, I think they were horny. 0:13:43.679 --> 0:13:48.000 And remember my little sister, my cousins when we used 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:50.280 to go to Puerto Rico. My cousins, they were kids 0:13:50.320 --> 0:13:52.440 and they were doing all kinds of ships. We were 0:13:52.520 --> 0:13:55.160 little kids, Like why are y'all so horny? Not me 0:13:55.320 --> 0:13:58.760 though with others, Like I was always real quiet and 0:13:58.840 --> 0:14:01.079 by myself. They were all like just older than me 0:14:01.200 --> 0:14:03.199 and doing weird ship but were they doing stuff with 0:14:03.280 --> 0:14:07.560 other kids? Kids? They were kids. It was just man 0:14:08.920 --> 0:14:13.240 though they were kids. They were all like twelve and yeen, 0:14:14.640 --> 0:14:17.120 that's what I'm saying, Like, how are y'all also horny? 0:14:17.400 --> 0:14:20.960 I was little though, like I was like ten eleven nine. 0:14:22.360 --> 0:14:24.280 They were kicking me out the room and be making 0:14:24.360 --> 0:14:28.800 out like why are y'all so horny? Yeah, hormones raging. 0:14:29.080 --> 0:14:32.120 I don't know. For girls, it's so different. I think 0:14:32.200 --> 0:14:34.440 it's it's taking me a long time in life to 0:14:34.560 --> 0:14:38.320 really be like really horny, like I've had I've had 0:14:38.520 --> 0:14:40.200 had to get older to be like, oh no, this 0:14:40.360 --> 0:14:42.560 is like really for me. I was horny when I 0:14:42.680 --> 0:14:44.720 was young. I was masturbating when I was young. But 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:47.360 I wasn't horny for other people. I was horny for 0:14:47.400 --> 0:14:49.880 the ship that I was watching on TV. I wasn't 0:14:49.920 --> 0:14:52.120 mastered anybody. I did make my dolls have sex with 0:14:52.160 --> 0:14:57.800 each other, ye like yeah, yeah, I wasn't the dolls 0:14:57.960 --> 0:15:01.320 playing house. Yeah, they But I didn't really know anything 0:15:01.360 --> 0:15:03.440 about sex. I just you know, and Kent didn't have 0:15:03.480 --> 0:15:06.040 a dick. She just had that weird little space in 0:15:06.080 --> 0:15:10.640 between the sides. The guy have the like the pubic 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:14.320 like finger, right, it's just like a curve. You can't 0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:17.920 should have had a dick? No, No, I don't think 0:15:18.400 --> 0:15:21.880 anatomically incorrect. Yeah, but because then now we walk around 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:25.920 thinking men just have like a but Barbie had. Barbie 0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:28.360 had like a vage area that she had booze and 0:15:28.440 --> 0:15:30.960 everything she had booze. Did she had a little crease? 0:15:31.400 --> 0:15:34.720 Did she have a crease in there? I don't remember. No, No, 0:15:35.200 --> 0:15:38.160 it was the same thing. It's like that. Yeah, it 0:15:38.320 --> 0:15:42.880 was it was like blocked out right. Oh, I know 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:44.560 what it was. It was the crease in the thighs 0:15:44.600 --> 0:15:47.040 that went like this because the legs moved. That's what 0:15:47.120 --> 0:15:49.840 I'm thinking of. Yeah, you really studied it. I mean 0:15:49.920 --> 0:15:52.080 I had Barbie dollars, Barbie dogs. She also have like 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:55.400 a little bit of hair on their legs. I think 0:15:55.440 --> 0:16:01.200 Barbie should have hair, ever stubble. They should have pubes. 0:16:01.280 --> 0:16:04.440 Like I'm people not having pubes, it's like this, that's 0:16:04.480 --> 0:16:09.120 not appropriate. But even laser hair removo. I feel like 0:16:09.240 --> 0:16:13.640 when young kids first start getting pubes, it's really imagine 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:17.400 if every adult you saw had no pubes and you 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:21.440 start getting pubes, what is that? Like that like yeah, 0:16:21.520 --> 0:16:24.440 you're like, what is this? What's wrong? Or you know exactly, 0:16:24.520 --> 0:16:27.920 and and it's initially it's a lot of fucking air, 0:16:28.640 --> 0:16:31.800 you know. And I feel like we have to teach 0:16:31.840 --> 0:16:35.560 our kids like no, this is normal, this is you know, 0:16:36.000 --> 0:16:39.280 not you are not supposed to not have any hair. 0:16:39.440 --> 0:16:43.840 Now you can choose to. But I still I mean, yeah, 0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:46.040 I mean laser hair moble. For me, it's been important 0:16:46.040 --> 0:16:48.400 because I get in grown hairs, my daughters get them, 0:16:48.720 --> 0:16:50.920 so in that aspect, it's actually really important. It's the 0:16:50.960 --> 0:16:54.560 only thing that prevents them from happening. But um, I 0:16:54.720 --> 0:16:56.680 had to like, do I take it all off or 0:16:56.680 --> 0:16:58.320 do I not. I'm like, I have to show my 0:16:58.560 --> 0:17:01.600 daughter at least, but have exactly because I feel like 0:17:01.600 --> 0:17:04.119 I have to show my daughter's like no, you're supposed 0:17:04.160 --> 0:17:06.720 to have exactly, and I feel like to me, I 0:17:06.800 --> 0:17:09.000 feel like that's really really important. I've never seen my 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:12.200 parents naked, even when you were younger. I don't remember 0:17:12.240 --> 0:17:14.440 nothing I remember. I don't remember if I'm younger, but 0:17:14.520 --> 0:17:17.240 I don't recall seeing the naked. I'm always naked. It 0:17:17.280 --> 0:17:20.680 from I see my mom naked all the time. Whether 0:17:20.760 --> 0:17:23.080 used to always be naked. I still always be like, mom, 0:17:23.160 --> 0:17:25.720 pust some clothes on. My mother was always naked. I 0:17:25.760 --> 0:17:28.080 just think it's important for them to see, like, oh, yeah, 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:30.639 this is what your body. I have to see that. 0:17:30.840 --> 0:17:33.960 It did. It made us such a normal thing to 0:17:34.400 --> 0:17:37.200 go and shave my legs when I was going through 0:17:37.280 --> 0:17:39.800 puberty and to you know, want to take care of 0:17:39.880 --> 0:17:43.159 myself and groom myself. Watching my mom like I couldn't 0:17:43.200 --> 0:17:45.960 imagine seeing my mom with no hair, right, you know, 0:17:46.400 --> 0:17:49.760 like it would just be like I never imagine. You 0:17:49.800 --> 0:17:51.919 don't remember. I don't remember. I don't think I've ever 0:17:51.960 --> 0:17:53.560 seen it because I feel like I would remember that 0:17:53.960 --> 0:17:55.800 and I remember the first time I shaved my legs. 0:17:55.880 --> 0:17:58.360 I was embarrassed. I didn't say anything, and I cut 0:17:58.440 --> 0:18:01.719 my whole leg like from all the way down by 0:18:01.760 --> 0:18:04.119 my ankle, all the way at my shop, one of 0:18:04.160 --> 0:18:08.560 your friends, and somebody legs yes, and I guess I 0:18:08.640 --> 0:18:10.960 pressed down to her and I really like cut it 0:18:11.040 --> 0:18:12.560 all the way. And then you know, when you cut yourself, 0:18:12.640 --> 0:18:17.639 shaving does not stop and it hurts. So then after that, 0:18:17.720 --> 0:18:19.520 I was like embarrassed. I used to wear panty holes 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:24.800 under my shorts. Ok, I want to do a lot, 0:18:27.920 --> 0:18:30.120 but I remember my mom taking a bath. We used 0:18:30.119 --> 0:18:33.000 to take a bath together, like we'll be getting reverty 0:18:33.040 --> 0:18:34.920 quick to come on, you're gonna take a shower with me, 0:18:35.280 --> 0:18:37.359 and she'll shave her on the arms in front of 0:18:37.520 --> 0:18:40.720 us and shaved. So that would never happen if my 0:18:40.800 --> 0:18:43.959 mom about it just came so naturally to know how 0:18:44.040 --> 0:18:47.000 to do it, you know. Yeah, I think it's important. 0:18:47.200 --> 0:18:50.040 I really do. And I tell them like, I'm I'm 0:18:50.080 --> 0:18:53.520 not comfortable all the time with myself. But if I'm 0:18:53.560 --> 0:18:55.720 not comfortable with myself, and how are you going to 0:18:55.760 --> 0:18:58.640 be comfortable with yourself? So that's why you're gonna see 0:18:58.680 --> 0:19:01.879 me naked, you know, like you know until like you know, 0:19:02.119 --> 0:19:04.320 my oldest son is. But I still I don't know, 0:19:04.520 --> 0:19:06.440 just it's not weird to me because yes, see, I 0:19:06.480 --> 0:19:08.239 think I was. It was different for me growing up 0:19:08.240 --> 0:19:10.240 because even like after that, I have friends like in 0:19:10.400 --> 0:19:12.960 college that they would just be walking around naked and 0:19:13.000 --> 0:19:14.719 I'd be like, oh my god, but some clone, right, 0:19:15.040 --> 0:19:19.280 because I definitely grow up seeing anybody naked, right, Yeah. No, 0:19:19.440 --> 0:19:21.359 I mean I think for me and like around my 0:19:21.560 --> 0:19:24.520 kids and like at home, it's important, but I'm not. 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:27.119 I mean, I guess if I'm around my friends and 0:19:27.200 --> 0:19:29.920 I'm like getting dressed, it's not a big deal. But 0:19:30.000 --> 0:19:32.040 I'm your girls for sure. But yeah, but I'm not 0:19:32.200 --> 0:19:34.760 like watching all the way around. But I'm like, yeah, 0:19:35.040 --> 0:19:37.440 have to change or like everybody's always helped me to 0:19:37.480 --> 0:19:39.879 put something on too, and I'm like, oh god, I 0:19:39.920 --> 0:19:41.840 think I'm still like I'm still kind of not like 0:19:41.920 --> 0:19:45.520 a naked person. You're not naked person. Yeah, I'm still 0:19:45.640 --> 0:19:47.800 not really Like I still would be like walking at 0:19:47.800 --> 0:19:50.879 the room and you were sleeping the bed together naked. 0:19:51.000 --> 0:19:52.760 It's like such a normal thing for us to be 0:19:52.880 --> 0:20:00.119 naked around each other. You guys, having sex. Yeah, her 0:20:00.200 --> 0:20:04.800 sex never Okay, you can't say that because you have 0:20:04.920 --> 0:20:07.840 that sex with women. So I've had women have had 0:20:07.880 --> 0:20:12.480 sex with me on me. I've never put my mouth 0:20:12.600 --> 0:20:19.320 on a girl you participated? I sure, Okay, I've had 0:20:19.320 --> 0:20:26.520 getting sex before. Okay, down out of the questioning, but 0:20:26.680 --> 0:20:31.119 not like my best Like, come on, you don't have 0:20:31.240 --> 0:20:37.879 sex with your friends. Well, sometimes you do see that. 0:20:41.400 --> 0:20:48.160 We can believe anything, alright, So people have written into questions. 0:20:48.920 --> 0:20:51.399 So here's the first question. All right, bo, So I 0:20:51.480 --> 0:20:53.400 need help. I recently just got out of a long 0:20:53.440 --> 0:20:55.800 relationship my new girlfriend who makes me very happy and 0:20:55.920 --> 0:20:58.400 has been for the last few months. She recently asked 0:20:58.440 --> 0:21:00.680 me to move in with her. EXCEPT did her invitation, 0:21:00.760 --> 0:21:02.680 but then shortly a few weeks after, she got a dog. 0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:05.719 Very much dislike animals, and I have expressed that to her, 0:21:05.760 --> 0:21:08.480 but I moved into her apartment. She has asked me 0:21:08.560 --> 0:21:10.840 to help financially around her apartment and with the dog. 0:21:10.920 --> 0:21:12.280 I want to make this work, but I want that 0:21:12.400 --> 0:21:14.960 dog gone. She claims it it's like her baby and 0:21:15.000 --> 0:21:16.320 she doesn't want to get rid of it. Would I 0:21:16.359 --> 0:21:18.920 be wrong for leaving? Even after expressing to her that 0:21:19.119 --> 0:21:23.200 I don't want this actually responsibility. Um. I think that 0:21:23.440 --> 0:21:27.760 when people are honest and they communicate, and I think 0:21:27.800 --> 0:21:29.879 if you choose to do something, I don't think you 0:21:29.960 --> 0:21:32.760 can be quote wrong or you know, wrong or right 0:21:32.800 --> 0:21:34.680 because you're being honest. And I think you have to 0:21:34.760 --> 0:21:37.879 stand in your truth and you know will be different 0:21:37.960 --> 0:21:41.280 if he was like making excuses about whatever or she 0:21:41.440 --> 0:21:44.760 had a man or woman. Um, but I think if 0:21:44.800 --> 0:21:47.280 you've expressed something and the person that you're with isn't 0:21:48.160 --> 0:21:51.800 listening to that and isn't willing to um, compromise because 0:21:51.840 --> 0:21:55.040 that's I mean, relationships, life, everything is a compromise, and 0:21:55.200 --> 0:21:57.560 you have to be willing to say what you're willing 0:21:57.640 --> 0:22:01.080 to accept and what you want person you're with to 0:22:01.240 --> 0:22:04.120 accept as well as it does work both ways. It's 0:22:04.160 --> 0:22:05.840 kind of messed up that she got the dog after 0:22:05.960 --> 0:22:08.560 he told her, yeah, I feel like I would be. 0:22:09.080 --> 0:22:14.679 I mean, he's still there like that's a good man, man, 0:22:14.760 --> 0:22:17.280 I know, I mean like you did work like this 0:22:17.440 --> 0:22:21.320 dog here, So I don't you know, I don't think so, 0:22:21.520 --> 0:22:24.399 but I think you know, talking about it and saying 0:22:24.520 --> 0:22:28.840 like I'm willing to you know, compromise on something else, 0:22:29.240 --> 0:22:32.000