1 00:00:00,800 --> 00:00:05,039 Speaker 1: Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya n An iHeartRadio podcast. 2 00:00:07,480 --> 00:00:12,600 Speaker 1: Hello everyone, we are scrubbing in. We are songs Becca today. 3 00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:16,320 Speaker 1: But it is no problem because we have a very 4 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:19,120 Speaker 1: special guest that I'm so excited to talk to. His 5 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:22,360 Speaker 1: name is Jason Tarctic, and actually he's in today because 6 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:24,480 Speaker 1: of you the Scrubbers. So I'd brought up an article 7 00:00:24,480 --> 00:00:28,000 Speaker 1: that I'd found of his the other day on the podcast, 8 00:00:28,040 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: and it's about talking about money and finances with your 9 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:35,040 Speaker 1: partner inside your relationship. And Jason Tartick has a podcast 10 00:00:35,080 --> 00:00:38,760 Speaker 1: called Trading Secrets. He also is just a financial expert. 11 00:00:38,840 --> 00:00:42,559 Speaker 1: He's an entrepreneur and he created OR. He has a 12 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 1: new book coming out called Talk Money to Me, The 13 00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:47,519 Speaker 1: Eight Essential Financial Questions to Discuss with your Partner. It's 14 00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:50,879 Speaker 1: coming out April second. And so we have Jason Tartik 15 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:54,560 Speaker 1: here today to talk about love, finances and all the things. 16 00:00:54,560 --> 00:01:03,920 Speaker 1: So please welcome Jason Tartick. Wow, Jason Tarctic scrubbing into 17 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: the Or. 18 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,480 Speaker 2: This is an honor you guys. 19 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,360 Speaker 3: I'll tell you what your fans are deep and committed, 20 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,759 Speaker 3: because I think there was one time you guys had 21 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:15,240 Speaker 3: mentioned something about a finance podcast, and my dms were 22 00:01:15,240 --> 00:01:17,640 Speaker 3: flooded with your fans. Like they're talking about money, they're 23 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:19,240 Speaker 3: talking about finance. You got a DMM, you. 24 00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:19,640 Speaker 2: Got a DS. 25 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:21,920 Speaker 1: Okay, So no, it wasn't. I thank you. First of all, 26 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:25,759 Speaker 1: our scrubbers are very loyal. They're amazing and they are 27 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:28,200 Speaker 1: they're really like the cream of the crop when it 28 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 1: comes to like humanity. But that aside, I wasn't just 29 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:33,880 Speaker 1: talking about finance. I was talking about you in particular. 30 00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 1: Oh nice, because I saw this article I think it 31 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:39,959 Speaker 1: was uh I'm not sure exactly where it was printed, 32 00:01:39,959 --> 00:01:42,520 Speaker 1: but it was all about you and talking about finances 33 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:45,959 Speaker 1: with your significant other. Okay, yes, And I am such 34 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 1: a big advocate for that, and like I talk about 35 00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:50,040 Speaker 1: it all the time because I think it's something that 36 00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 1: women don't necessarily talk about. People aren't comfortable talking about it, 37 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:56,680 Speaker 1: and I think it's so it's a fundamental thing in 38 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:59,960 Speaker 1: a relationship to discuss and be on the same page with. Yeah, 39 00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:01,320 Speaker 1: and so I talked about all the times. So I 40 00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:04,840 Speaker 1: was bringing up this article that you had heard that 41 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:07,720 Speaker 1: you were in and kind of going through all these things. 42 00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:10,120 Speaker 1: So I definitely want to I'm glad that you DMD 43 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 1: us because I wanted to have you in and like 44 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:15,200 Speaker 1: really get into your new book and really kind of 45 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:16,919 Speaker 1: get into the nitty gritty of that because I think 46 00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:20,360 Speaker 1: there's so much to learn. But before we get into 47 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,200 Speaker 1: the book and everything, I want to catch up. 48 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,079 Speaker 2: Because I was getting excited. I was like, we'll get 49 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,000 Speaker 2: right into it, but let's go. 50 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:27,000 Speaker 1: I want to catch up because it's been a really 51 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 1: long time. I know, in an alternate universe, yes, we 52 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:30,840 Speaker 1: could be married. 53 00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,280 Speaker 2: I know. I was wondering to bring this up. 54 00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:38,840 Speaker 1: I think it's so funny because I feel I obviously 55 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:42,000 Speaker 1: this was we figured I was twenty eighteen, yes, and 56 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 1: we've come a long way. I really just adore you 57 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,120 Speaker 1: as a as a person. I've always been like a 58 00:02:49,160 --> 00:02:52,400 Speaker 1: big fan of yours, and so I'm just it feels 59 00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,760 Speaker 1: really nice to like have you on the podcast and 60 00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:56,520 Speaker 1: like us do it. Yeah, Easton, there we go. 61 00:02:56,720 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 3: Oh that's I got some behind the scene you know 62 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,680 Speaker 3: something I've never told I answered behind the scenes dirt 63 00:03:01,720 --> 00:03:04,799 Speaker 3: on that interview. What Yeah, okay, so this is good. Yeah, 64 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:08,120 Speaker 3: I forgot about this. So when you know how they 65 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:10,840 Speaker 3: like kind of like set it up, like Ryan was 66 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:12,239 Speaker 3: gonna ask you and I to go on date. 67 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:12,600 Speaker 1: Yeah. 68 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 3: Well I was told by someone like behind the scenes, 69 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,680 Speaker 3: like you don't know what's it, you don't know what's next, 70 00:03:17,720 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 3: so don't like they told me to like deflect and 71 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:24,519 Speaker 3: kick hunter. I swear to god, I swear I've never 72 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 3: told about like, hey, we don't know, like you know, 73 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 3: there's some talks about what's going on, and like it 74 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:31,920 Speaker 3: was someone that was like deflected, kick like, don't don't 75 00:03:31,919 --> 00:03:35,120 Speaker 3: accept the date, I swear to god. So I was like, 76 00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 3: and they told me that as I walked in, and 77 00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:39,680 Speaker 3: I'm like, what, you're probably well, I didn't know how 78 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:40,200 Speaker 3: to like deal. 79 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,200 Speaker 2: I was like what did I say? What did I say? Well, 80 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 2: you're going back to seat. I was like okay, it's 81 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 2: like I'm going back to work. Yeah. So Ryan was like, 82 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,160 Speaker 2: I'll have you guys go on a date tomorrow. It'll 83 00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 2: be great. And I was like, ah, I guess I 84 00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:51,640 Speaker 2: gotta go to see from work. 85 00:03:52,240 --> 00:03:54,000 Speaker 1: I guess I guess I gotta go. 86 00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:56,040 Speaker 2: That is very very funny. 87 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:58,880 Speaker 3: It's so funny, but you know what, it's all good 88 00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 3: stuff and congratulate thank you so much. I've met your 89 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:05,640 Speaker 3: now fiance. Such a beauty. Yeah, such a great guy. 90 00:04:05,720 --> 00:04:06,040 Speaker 2: He is. 91 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,240 Speaker 1: He's just like salt of the earth, like a really 92 00:04:08,280 --> 00:04:08,960 Speaker 1: really good guy. 93 00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:11,560 Speaker 3: And meet someone and like you can instantly feel like 94 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:13,920 Speaker 3: just good, like clean energy. 95 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:16,479 Speaker 2: Yes, instinct. Yeah, that's a good guy. 96 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,719 Speaker 1: And he's not in the industry, but he can just 97 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:20,880 Speaker 1: be around everybody and it's like very chill and so 98 00:04:20,960 --> 00:04:22,680 Speaker 1: I really like that about him because he just can 99 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,760 Speaker 1: connect with people in a very normal way. 100 00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, totally. 101 00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 1: But I feel that same way about you, Like I 102 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:29,480 Speaker 1: feel like you have that energy that's just like good, 103 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,040 Speaker 1: especially like I think coming off of like reality TV, 104 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:34,480 Speaker 1: there is this like stigma, but I feel like you 105 00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:37,120 Speaker 1: really are just like you are who you are. You're 106 00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:39,520 Speaker 1: very genuine assault of the earth. 107 00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,719 Speaker 3: That's really nice you say that, But I'm thinking, like 108 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:44,440 Speaker 3: when you say that, what is it? I think it's 109 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:47,359 Speaker 3: I think my family and friends just keep me so 110 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:51,160 Speaker 3: grounded with everything, right, Like they check me with anything 111 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:54,080 Speaker 3: from personal issues to professional things. What the hell are 112 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:55,920 Speaker 3: you doing here? What do you say in here? And 113 00:04:55,960 --> 00:04:58,160 Speaker 3: I actually think that's like a huge life lesson. It's 114 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:00,680 Speaker 3: like making sure the people in your corner are not 115 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:03,960 Speaker 3: an echo chamber. You need to be held accountable by 116 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,920 Speaker 3: the people you love in the door, and when they 117 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,200 Speaker 3: give you that feedback, you have to be willing to listen. 118 00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:10,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think that's been that's been huge. 119 00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:13,960 Speaker 1: So okay, so I want to pivot into kind of 120 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,200 Speaker 1: I think the article that I found it was you 121 00:05:16,279 --> 00:05:19,760 Speaker 1: kind of discussing things. Obviously you were engaged to Caitlin. 122 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:22,720 Speaker 1: That engagement ended and I'm really sorry. Yeah, and no, no 123 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,960 Speaker 1: matter what goes on behind the scenes, it sucks for 124 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,839 Speaker 1: both people involved. So I'm just wanting I'm really really sorry. 125 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:28,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure. 126 00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:32,040 Speaker 1: But one thing I wanted to get into was something 127 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:33,880 Speaker 1: that you mentioned in the book Talk Money to Me, 128 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:37,440 Speaker 1: and it's in the investment that you guys made in 129 00:05:37,480 --> 00:05:38,000 Speaker 1: your dogs. 130 00:05:38,279 --> 00:05:38,599 Speaker 2: Yeah. 131 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:44,680 Speaker 1: Making an investment in sharing something that you know before 132 00:05:44,760 --> 00:05:47,640 Speaker 1: you are married is very interesting because then you break 133 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:49,520 Speaker 1: up and like, what do you do with the dogs? 134 00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:53,479 Speaker 1: I'm very curious of your situation how you split the time. 135 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:57,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, So to give some background here forone listening. 136 00:05:57,920 --> 00:05:59,520 Speaker 3: So the books Talk Money to Me in the first 137 00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:02,360 Speaker 3: two chains are all about things like I screwed up 138 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:05,320 Speaker 3: and I talk about some of my you know, my resume, 139 00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,760 Speaker 3: just to build credibility in the finance space to say 140 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,400 Speaker 3: he listen, like if I'm doing it, you know, maybe 141 00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:12,640 Speaker 3: others are doing it too. And so you know, I 142 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:15,840 Speaker 3: was a banker, NBA and accounting and finance, own several 143 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:18,760 Speaker 3: businesses stuff like that, So this is like I'm a 144 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:21,320 Speaker 3: personal finance expert, at least I tell myself I am. 145 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:22,760 Speaker 2: And I still missed a lot of this. 146 00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:25,120 Speaker 3: So that's kind of like the first two chapters, and 147 00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:27,200 Speaker 3: in these chapters, I talk about the. 148 00:06:27,120 --> 00:06:29,880 Speaker 1: Fact that it's not The thing is finance isn't like sexy. 149 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,160 Speaker 1: You know, when you start dating someone, you don't really 150 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:33,880 Speaker 1: bring it up, You don't really think to bring it up, 151 00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,039 Speaker 1: and then it's like you're so far in, yeah, that 152 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:38,200 Speaker 1: you're just in, and then you kind of don't realize 153 00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:40,159 Speaker 1: that you didn't really cover all the bases. So it's like, 154 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:42,039 Speaker 1: I wouldn't be so hard on yourself because it's like 155 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:45,000 Speaker 1: you are this financial guy, but it's it makes sense 156 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,400 Speaker 1: that you didn't bring it into your relationship. 157 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:50,000 Speaker 3: It's it's not sexy. It's quite frankly hard to talk about. Yeah, 158 00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:52,800 Speaker 3: most of us don't even know what to talk about 159 00:06:52,839 --> 00:06:55,600 Speaker 3: because we weren't taught it in our system. So imagine 160 00:06:55,640 --> 00:06:58,159 Speaker 3: you have to talk about something that we know has 161 00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 3: a very deep tie to success relationships and even has 162 00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,919 Speaker 3: a connection to intimacy. So, and I promise I'm going 163 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,640 Speaker 3: to answer the doc question. But seventy three percent of 164 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:09,840 Speaker 3: couples say that money is a material point of contention 165 00:07:09,960 --> 00:07:13,320 Speaker 3: in the relationship. Of this study, more than half of 166 00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:17,040 Speaker 3: them said that the money issues are connecting to decreased intimacy. 167 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:19,120 Speaker 2: So these money topics. 168 00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:20,880 Speaker 3: Are not only impacting like our wallets and how we're 169 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:24,520 Speaker 3: living in our arguments, they're impacting our physical intimacy within 170 00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 3: our relationship. So it's such a huge topic. It's what 171 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:29,160 Speaker 3: I'm passionate about, and I could talk all day. 172 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: I could too, because I also think that the way 173 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:35,840 Speaker 1: that you handle your finances as an individual is one thing, 174 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,680 Speaker 1: but then you're never going to find another individual that 175 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:42,559 Speaker 1: handles finances the exact same ways. We're individuals for reason, 176 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:45,720 Speaker 1: you know. So it's like learning how somebody else deals 177 00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:49,320 Speaker 1: with their financial situations and then kind of compromising, coming 178 00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:52,920 Speaker 1: to like a middle ground because it's just impossible, you 179 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:54,560 Speaker 1: know what I mean, to find someone that's exactly on 180 00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:55,240 Speaker 1: the same page as you. 181 00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:58,040 Speaker 2: Impossible, which means it's even that much more important. 182 00:07:58,080 --> 00:08:00,000 Speaker 3: We're talking about that you know it's a huge ass 183 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:03,240 Speaker 3: we know it's weaponized, we know it's leveraged, we know 184 00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:07,240 Speaker 3: there's massive financial deception. Forty three percent of all relationships 185 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:11,000 Speaker 3: at least one person is committing what's called financial infidelity. 186 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:14,360 Speaker 3: So that's like cheating and manipulation through money. So we 187 00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:16,880 Speaker 3: know that there are all sorts of issues with it. 188 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:20,160 Speaker 3: So the overarching theme of like, we don't have a choice. 189 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,960 Speaker 3: You want to get comfortable. We need to get comfortable. 190 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:24,760 Speaker 3: And then I'll even tie it back to your question 191 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:27,360 Speaker 3: with the dog. So you know, it's so hard to 192 00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:30,600 Speaker 3: think about these like fur babies you're obsessed with as 193 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:33,320 Speaker 3: an asset, but a lot of things with finance you 194 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:35,640 Speaker 3: don't think about. It is like contracts or assets, but 195 00:08:35,679 --> 00:08:39,680 Speaker 3: they are. According to law, a dog is an actual asset, right, 196 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:42,320 Speaker 3: So the idea is when you get a joint asset, 197 00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:45,520 Speaker 3: you got to have some type of contract in place, 198 00:08:45,559 --> 00:08:47,640 Speaker 3: even if it's like super high level you go to 199 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:48,720 Speaker 3: legal zoom, you just. 200 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:49,840 Speaker 2: Draft it up yourself. 201 00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:53,160 Speaker 3: The idea of like coming up with what happens today, 202 00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 3: what do we do with expenses? 203 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:57,000 Speaker 2: And if tomorrow doesn't work out, what does it look like? 204 00:08:57,160 --> 00:09:00,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, is so preventive and so important that also to 205 00:09:00,400 --> 00:09:02,720 Speaker 3: like post nups and pre nups, and with both the dogs, 206 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,319 Speaker 3: we didn't have any type of contracts and you can 207 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:09,439 Speaker 3: imagine though, yes there's handshake agreements, but then when things 208 00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:12,640 Speaker 3: get ruffled a little bit, you know, that can change 209 00:09:12,679 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 3: the tide too. So the importance whether it's with dogs, assets, 210 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:20,160 Speaker 3: et cetera, is huge, and so in this book too. Unfortunately, 211 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:24,000 Speaker 3: we learn from just massive mistakes. Yeah, so I put 212 00:09:24,040 --> 00:09:25,840 Speaker 3: a survey out there on my Instagram. I was like, 213 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,800 Speaker 3: if you know someone who's experienced financial fraud in a 214 00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:31,720 Speaker 3: relationship or a loved one, shoot me the story, send 215 00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:32,360 Speaker 3: me an email. 216 00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 2: We got over a thousand emails. 217 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,880 Speaker 3: Thought like, I've never put anything on Instagram that's gotten 218 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:38,679 Speaker 3: that much response. 219 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:39,040 Speaker 1: Wow. 220 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:42,360 Speaker 3: And the stories I couldn't believe them. But one specific 221 00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,840 Speaker 3: in this book, she went by Jane Doek. She wanted 222 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,319 Speaker 3: to be anonymous, but she gets married to this guy quickly. 223 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:50,760 Speaker 3: She doesn't have the income he does, but he says 224 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:53,599 Speaker 3: his credit is bad, so she takes out the mortgage 225 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,320 Speaker 3: and then he puts his name on the deed with 226 00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:59,440 Speaker 3: her because he said he'll venmo her. Okay, so the 227 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 3: mortgage in her name and the deed, they both have 228 00:10:01,679 --> 00:10:02,559 Speaker 3: ownership of the house. 229 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:04,440 Speaker 2: The day they close. 230 00:10:04,559 --> 00:10:08,120 Speaker 3: Irs sends a letter the Irs owns the entire house 231 00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:11,200 Speaker 3: because he has back taxes he owed. They end up 232 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:13,560 Speaker 3: getting divorced. She and her new husband had to pay 233 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 3: off all of his back taxes to get ownership of 234 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,000 Speaker 3: their house, and she lost over one hundred thousand dollars. 235 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:20,000 Speaker 3: And this is someone who had earnings of fifty five 236 00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:23,280 Speaker 3: thousand dollars. So this is the stuff that's happening day 237 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,160 Speaker 3: in and day out, and like, we have to protect ourselves. 238 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:26,720 Speaker 2: We have to. 239 00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:32,520 Speaker 1: I know, it's crazy, so crazy, but I remember before 240 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 1: my fiance and I were engaged, we got our puppy together, 241 00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: and a lot of people were telling me, like, this 242 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:42,680 Speaker 1: is a mistake. You shouldn't do that before you're married, 243 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:44,320 Speaker 1: you know, like this is what happens if you guys 244 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,079 Speaker 1: break up, like who gets the dog? And I was 245 00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:49,480 Speaker 1: like me, of course, but like, but I never thought 246 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:51,040 Speaker 1: of it in that way, you know what I mean, 247 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,600 Speaker 1: Like because you're when you're in a relationship, you don't 248 00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:55,800 Speaker 1: think about it ending, and then but it is like 249 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:59,080 Speaker 1: it's like and I also think too, not even just 250 00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:01,720 Speaker 1: like custody of the dog, but also like finances, what 251 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:03,560 Speaker 1: if they need surgery, Who's going to pay for the surgery? 252 00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:05,319 Speaker 1: What if they need like you know, all this stuff 253 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,000 Speaker 1: that they needed the vet, you know, like where does 254 00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,200 Speaker 1: that go? Is it just whoever's there with that day 255 00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:10,600 Speaker 1: that that's to take care of it? You know, like 256 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,839 Speaker 1: there's all this stuff that kind of comes into play. 257 00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:15,120 Speaker 3: Oh, so many things that come into play with that. 258 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:18,040 Speaker 3: And the idea of like thinking about breaking up and 259 00:11:18,080 --> 00:11:20,040 Speaker 3: the idea of think about like who gets the pet 260 00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:23,200 Speaker 3: and how it works. It's like so hard, especially with 261 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:27,120 Speaker 3: the pet like that. But it also I had to 262 00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,640 Speaker 3: say this, there's this massive business behind it. 263 00:11:29,679 --> 00:11:30,240 Speaker 2: How do I know? 264 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:32,240 Speaker 3: Because when we broke up, I had to think through this. 265 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 3: So I started calling people and I see there are 266 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:37,760 Speaker 3: many attorneys out there all over the country that literally 267 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 3: make their entire careers in living of dog ownership, custody battles. 268 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:45,080 Speaker 2: That is like, this is a massive thing. 269 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 3: So if you think about that, And I also want 270 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:50,320 Speaker 3: to make sure it's very clear, like by accident, I 271 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:54,079 Speaker 3: have a great situation right now, we're in agreement, we're 272 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,800 Speaker 3: in lockstep. We actually had a joint account for the 273 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 3: dogs we both funded that we used for the dogs. 274 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:01,120 Speaker 2: So like it all worked out. 275 00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:05,360 Speaker 3: But this type of example also leads to pre numps 276 00:12:05,360 --> 00:12:06,160 Speaker 3: and post nups. 277 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, are you a fan, huge fanky. 278 00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:09,240 Speaker 2: Huge fan. 279 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:10,680 Speaker 3: And one thing I want to say I'm a huge 280 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:13,520 Speaker 3: fan of is because of what you said, protection of 281 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:17,920 Speaker 3: some of Like we know that in higher household incomes, 282 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:21,120 Speaker 3: according to research today, it's seventy percent of the men 283 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,760 Speaker 3: that are taking control of the finances. We also know 284 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:26,080 Speaker 3: that women are out living men. We also know that 285 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:29,080 Speaker 3: the wage gap is closing and I think it's going 286 00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:31,760 Speaker 3: to turn. So the importance of your message to be 287 00:12:31,920 --> 00:12:34,760 Speaker 3: like we as like new thought leaders and women in 288 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:37,400 Speaker 3: leadership need to own this, take responsibility of this and 289 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:40,760 Speaker 3: have visibility to it is so so important. And this 290 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:43,480 Speaker 3: ties into post nups at pre nups for pre nups. 291 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:44,120 Speaker 2: Here's my take. 292 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:48,080 Speaker 3: Every single state, anybody that's married right now, you have 293 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,120 Speaker 3: a pre nup. Okay, People are like, no, I don't know, 294 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:50,600 Speaker 3: I don't know. 295 00:12:50,679 --> 00:12:50,959 Speaker 2: You do. 296 00:12:51,320 --> 00:12:54,120 Speaker 3: Your state law is a prenup California law. It's different 297 00:12:54,120 --> 00:12:56,679 Speaker 3: than Florida, different than New York, different Tennessee. They're all 298 00:12:56,720 --> 00:13:00,280 Speaker 3: customized state by state. So the only question is do 299 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,040 Speaker 3: you want to look at those laws and then customize 300 00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:05,880 Speaker 3: them to your situation because everyone's situation is different. We 301 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 3: already talked about that, so you have the opportunity to 302 00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:10,720 Speaker 3: do that now if you're married and you haven't done that. 303 00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:13,720 Speaker 3: This is why I think postnups are huge. Think about 304 00:13:13,760 --> 00:13:17,200 Speaker 3: a caretaker, Think about their career track. They now stay 305 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:22,120 Speaker 3: at home. They're forgiving potentially huge income earnings, acceleration within 306 00:13:22,160 --> 00:13:26,040 Speaker 3: their career and their own money. What happens if there's 307 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:30,520 Speaker 3: a divorce after the marriage and they're not protected even 308 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:33,480 Speaker 3: though they provided so much value to their family, but 309 00:13:33,559 --> 00:13:36,120 Speaker 3: they don't have that income source anymore. They don't have 310 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:38,880 Speaker 3: the senior vice president title because they're not the caregiver. 311 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:43,240 Speaker 3: So post ups can help protect individuals that are giving 312 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:45,840 Speaker 3: to their family but maybe not earning. And so I'm 313 00:13:45,880 --> 00:13:47,640 Speaker 3: just a huge fan of because it forces us to 314 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 3: have these conversations. And we know historically fifty percent of 315 00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:56,000 Speaker 3: relationships unfortunately don't work out, So why not protect ourselves 316 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:59,880 Speaker 3: so dark, I know it's sad, it's harrd to get there. 317 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:04,000 Speaker 2: You got this. 318 00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,640 Speaker 1: At what point do you think it's important when you 319 00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:24,280 Speaker 1: start dating somebody to bring up these questions like what's 320 00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:26,800 Speaker 1: your credit score, what's your income? Like at what point? 321 00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:28,640 Speaker 1: And then how would you kind of bring it up 322 00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:30,720 Speaker 1: on a date where it's not so intense. 323 00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:32,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like first day, you're not going to be 324 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:34,040 Speaker 2: like what's you're not worth? 325 00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:34,320 Speaker 3: Right? 326 00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:39,040 Speaker 2: Like? That's so I was. I was second secondary actually, 327 00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:42,520 Speaker 2: but I was. It was. 328 00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:44,240 Speaker 1: It was definitely one of the early ones where I 329 00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:45,840 Speaker 1: was like, talk money to me. 330 00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,880 Speaker 2: I love it. I'm going to answer the question. 331 00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:49,440 Speaker 3: I have a I have a question for you though, 332 00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:52,840 Speaker 3: when you had those conversations, what was like the intention 333 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,560 Speaker 3: behind it, Like what made you say, like day one, 334 00:14:55,640 --> 00:14:57,560 Speaker 3: day two, because this is rare and it's beautiful. 335 00:14:58,080 --> 00:14:59,880 Speaker 2: What was some of your thought process behind it? 336 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 1: I think for me, I've always been very uh I say, 337 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna say careful, but like smart with my money. 338 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:09,360 Speaker 1: I've not I don't spend a ton. I'm not against 339 00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:11,400 Speaker 1: anybody that spends a ton. I don't judge, but like, 340 00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:15,120 Speaker 1: I'm very intentional about my finances. I also want to 341 00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:19,280 Speaker 1: have a security like thing in place. So, and I 342 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,120 Speaker 1: dated a ton as you as you know you're trying 343 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:24,520 Speaker 1: to try to send me. I was dating a lot 344 00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:27,920 Speaker 1: of men and I felt like they're like men. A 345 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 1: lot of men are kind of like you think men 346 00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:32,560 Speaker 1: have finance all figured out, a lot of them do not. 347 00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:35,240 Speaker 1: And so I was learning that that, like a lot 348 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:37,600 Speaker 1: of men have no freaking clue what they're doing. And 349 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:40,360 Speaker 1: so I was like, Okay, I'm not I just don't 350 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:42,760 Speaker 1: want to end up like again, I'm not sitting here 351 00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:45,000 Speaker 1: saying I know exactly what I'm doing and I'm really 352 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,800 Speaker 1: good with all this financial stuff, but I'm I think 353 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:50,840 Speaker 1: I'm a little bit more than the norm. So I 354 00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:52,360 Speaker 1: was like, I want somebody that's kind of at my 355 00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:56,600 Speaker 1: level in this kind of sense. And also, my fiance 356 00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:59,280 Speaker 1: had two kids and I'd gone through a divorce, so 357 00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:00,800 Speaker 1: I was just like I need to know kind of 358 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:02,640 Speaker 1: what that situation is, you know. I just wanted to 359 00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:05,240 Speaker 1: like know what was going on before I was like 360 00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:06,040 Speaker 1: too deep in. 361 00:16:06,280 --> 00:16:08,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so important. 362 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,040 Speaker 3: I think one thing that's big is like, for anyone 363 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,800 Speaker 3: out there that's having financial challenges, like your net worth 364 00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 3: is not your self worth, right, And the idea is like, 365 00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:19,840 Speaker 3: when you have these conversations, never let anyone shame you, 366 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,400 Speaker 3: because having the conversation is the hardest thing to do. 367 00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,680 Speaker 3: Most people in relationships. We talk about red flags all 368 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 3: the time, gas lighting, manipulation, lying, right. The problem with 369 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,840 Speaker 3: the finance talk is we all bury our flag so 370 00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,000 Speaker 3: we can't even see them. Yeah, So if you're even 371 00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:36,280 Speaker 3: showing your red flag when it comes to finance, like, 372 00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:38,920 Speaker 3: hats off to you, because every person in here in 373 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:42,360 Speaker 3: some capacity can improve their finances at some level. So yeah, 374 00:16:42,560 --> 00:16:45,040 Speaker 3: first and foremost, that's that when it comes to the credit, 375 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:47,760 Speaker 3: it's a huge point because you can look at someone 376 00:16:47,760 --> 00:16:50,560 Speaker 3: with like a six hundred to seven, like under six 377 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:52,720 Speaker 3: twenty credit score and someone that is a seven to 378 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:55,800 Speaker 3: sixty credit score and for the same house three hundred 379 00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:58,920 Speaker 3: thousand dollars mortgage thirty years, the person with a seven 380 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:01,280 Speaker 3: sixty year above is going to pay one hundred and 381 00:17:01,280 --> 00:17:04,639 Speaker 3: ten thousand dollars less an interest over thirty years for 382 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:08,359 Speaker 3: the same exact asset. So you think about what that means. Yeah, 383 00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 3: and if you have less than a six twenty, it 384 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:12,440 Speaker 3: doesn't mean you shouldn't be dating someone that has a 385 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:13,000 Speaker 3: seven hundred. 386 00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:15,760 Speaker 2: Talk about it. She can get on the same page. 387 00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:19,439 Speaker 3: Another example in this book that's eye opening, and I 388 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:21,359 Speaker 3: looked at all the financials to make sure it was true. 389 00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:23,200 Speaker 3: Before I put in I have a buddy owns a 390 00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:27,280 Speaker 3: car dealership. Okay, guy comes in, perfect credit score and 391 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:29,920 Speaker 3: he buys one hundred and fifty thousand dollars g Wagon. 392 00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:33,359 Speaker 3: He gets a two percent interest rate. A girl comes 393 00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:36,439 Speaker 3: in that same day and buys a Toyota Corolla for 394 00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:40,880 Speaker 3: twenty one thousand dollars. Her credit was buried because other 395 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:44,240 Speaker 3: people used her good credit at one point co signed 396 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,320 Speaker 3: when she didn't know and their credit went bad, so 397 00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:48,760 Speaker 3: her credit was less than six hundred. So you have 398 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,399 Speaker 3: one guy one hundred and fifty k g Wagon, his 399 00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:54,359 Speaker 3: monthly payments around twenty one hundred dollars twenty one thousand 400 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:58,320 Speaker 3: dollars Toyota Corolla, terrible credit. Because of that, the insurance 401 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:02,480 Speaker 3: monthly went up signific Her monthly payment for the twenty 402 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:06,080 Speaker 3: one thousand dollars Toylet Corolla was more than the G Wagon. Yeah, 403 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:08,640 Speaker 3: and the dealer showed me this right. So the impact 404 00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:11,840 Speaker 3: of credit is huge on what we pay over time, 405 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:14,919 Speaker 3: and the visibility to this stuff is important so that 406 00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:17,520 Speaker 3: we can help one another improve it. But it goes 407 00:18:17,560 --> 00:18:19,640 Speaker 3: back to your question. A lot of people aren't gonna 408 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,680 Speaker 3: step into this. So in the book, I have ten 409 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,000 Speaker 3: questions that you can go on your first date and 410 00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:27,280 Speaker 3: have fun with money discussions because money is usually like itcky, 411 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,159 Speaker 3: weird and we want to run from it. So like 412 00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:30,480 Speaker 3: a good one would be like you go on a 413 00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:32,520 Speaker 3: first date. You know, if you win a million dollars 414 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 3: today and you have to spend every dollar, like where 415 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:35,880 Speaker 3: are you spending it? 416 00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:38,000 Speaker 2: How are you spending it? And why. 417 00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:40,159 Speaker 3: It's a fun one because it's like get a creative 418 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:42,440 Speaker 3: and it also tells me about your patterns, like it's 419 00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:43,119 Speaker 3: important to you? 420 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:44,080 Speaker 2: Is it like an exact. 421 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 1: Book, a trip? I'm gonna invest it? 422 00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:51,680 Speaker 2: And then like yeah, or is it a mom and dad? 423 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:54,280 Speaker 3: So you can learn and have conversation. Another fun one 424 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:56,920 Speaker 3: is like, unless you go broke today, what is one thing? 425 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,080 Speaker 3: Like you know, Donnie, you overspend on, but like what 426 00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:01,920 Speaker 3: is it? And why do you spend it on that? 427 00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:03,040 Speaker 2: Or like in the. 428 00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:05,680 Speaker 3: Last year, what's the most outrageous purchase you made? 429 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:06,360 Speaker 2: In what was it? 430 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,600 Speaker 3: You could start to learn about people's behaviors and have 431 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:10,960 Speaker 3: fun with it. Yeah, and then I think from there 432 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:14,040 Speaker 3: you can get further into the conversation. I have a 433 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:17,040 Speaker 3: fun little stupid cheesy saying that's like if you can 434 00:19:17,119 --> 00:19:19,679 Speaker 3: have sex, you can start talking about checks, like at 435 00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,919 Speaker 3: least to have the conversation going. But I think like 436 00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:26,600 Speaker 3: the absolute golden rule is like you cannot go and 437 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:30,080 Speaker 3: cohabitate with someone until you know the eight numbers that 438 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,879 Speaker 3: we talk about in this book. If you want to 439 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:33,320 Speaker 3: set yourself up for success. 440 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:35,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so true because like I was reading through 441 00:19:36,119 --> 00:19:37,760 Speaker 1: kind of your book and the things that you say 442 00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:40,440 Speaker 1: to like find out about early on. And it's funny 443 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,520 Speaker 1: because I'm like I talk with my fance about money 444 00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,240 Speaker 1: a lot, but I didn't even know his credit score 445 00:19:44,320 --> 00:19:47,120 Speaker 1: until like recently. It didn't even like cross my mind, 446 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:48,560 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. But then like we talk 447 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,919 Speaker 1: about finances a lot, and like as we're trying to 448 00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,680 Speaker 1: you know, get married and like merge siding, I think 449 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:57,920 Speaker 1: also to deciding if you want to keep your finances 450 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,280 Speaker 1: separate or keep something separate and do a joint thing, 451 00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,040 Speaker 1: or if you just all all both want to just 452 00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:04,240 Speaker 1: make a joint thing and kind of go from there. 453 00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:06,600 Speaker 1: It's like everybody does things a different way. And like 454 00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,720 Speaker 1: I talk to a lot of I talk to a 455 00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:12,119 Speaker 1: lot of other women who are in households, you know, 456 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,280 Speaker 1: where there's other children, involved, you know, like step kids 457 00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:18,760 Speaker 1: and how that financial situation works, and it's like everybody 458 00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:21,040 Speaker 1: deals with stuff in a different way, and so it's 459 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,600 Speaker 1: I think it's important because there's not You can't sit 460 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,639 Speaker 1: here and say there's one way that everybody has to 461 00:20:25,640 --> 00:20:28,560 Speaker 1: do it. Everybody's circumstances are different. But I think having 462 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:32,760 Speaker 1: the conversation is so, so so important. And I just 463 00:20:32,840 --> 00:20:35,520 Speaker 1: I love this book because I feel like it is 464 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:40,040 Speaker 1: it's I don't know, I've never really seen anything like it. 465 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:42,919 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think there's so many like self help books 466 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:45,479 Speaker 3: with love, and there's so many with money, but like 467 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:48,719 Speaker 3: marrying the two, there's not much out there. And like 468 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,959 Speaker 3: you said, there are so many people in the personal 469 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,760 Speaker 3: finance space that have these like cookie cutter solutions. There 470 00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:56,520 Speaker 3: is nothing cookie cutter in finance, absolutely not. And I 471 00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:58,600 Speaker 3: always like to take like if we talk about all 472 00:20:58,600 --> 00:21:00,800 Speaker 3: these different investments and mutual fun and ETFs and I 473 00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:02,040 Speaker 3: bore you with that or lose you with that, I 474 00:21:02,119 --> 00:21:04,120 Speaker 3: like to bring it down to analogies we know, think 475 00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,600 Speaker 3: about like you go into a grocery store, and then 476 00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,600 Speaker 3: your average grocery store is through thirty nine thousand, five 477 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:10,760 Speaker 3: hundred items. 478 00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:11,359 Speaker 2: In a grocery store. 479 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:14,520 Speaker 3: You, yours cart's gonna be looking different than mine than his, 480 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:16,960 Speaker 3: based on your occasion, what you need, the price points, 481 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,640 Speaker 3: et cetera. That's like picking out investments. So if I'm 482 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:21,159 Speaker 3: going to tell you what investments you should be in, 483 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,680 Speaker 3: it's so it's like me telling you exactly what should 484 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,800 Speaker 3: be in your cart with thirty nine thousand, five hundred 485 00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:26,680 Speaker 3: different items. 486 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:28,679 Speaker 2: Like I have to know so much more about you. 487 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:31,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think, like even think about our wine 488 00:21:31,240 --> 00:21:33,240 Speaker 3: drinkers back there. I'm sure there's a ton of those 489 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,960 Speaker 3: listening to this. Right, you don't have to be the Somalia. 490 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,360 Speaker 3: You don't have to know everything about wine. But when 491 00:21:38,359 --> 00:21:40,640 Speaker 3: it comes to money, like kind of like when you're 492 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:43,159 Speaker 3: going to buy a bottle, you gotta know a little bit, right, 493 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:45,200 Speaker 3: You gotta know that, like Organ's got good pinos and 494 00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,800 Speaker 3: Napa's got good cabs. And I think that's the thing 495 00:21:47,840 --> 00:21:51,160 Speaker 3: with finances. It's boring. We weren't taught it in our system, 496 00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:53,399 Speaker 3: and so we run from it. But I come on 497 00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:55,840 Speaker 3: here not to be an alarmist, but to just be like, 498 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,640 Speaker 3: we know what we're doing when it comes to love 499 00:21:58,680 --> 00:21:59,919 Speaker 3: and money and talking about it. 500 00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:00,879 Speaker 2: We know today. 501 00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:04,040 Speaker 3: It's not working. It's not all these statistics show us. 502 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,160 Speaker 3: So like, let's step into it a little bit because 503 00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,720 Speaker 3: it's impacting so much. 504 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:08,159 Speaker 2: Of our lives. 505 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:12,480 Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I'm curious because you said that you and 506 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:16,400 Speaker 1: Caitlin didn't discuss all these things before you got engaged. 507 00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:19,119 Speaker 1: Do you think if you guys had gone like forensic 508 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:20,960 Speaker 1: on this that it could have worked out or was 509 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,080 Speaker 1: it just other stuff too? 510 00:22:22,240 --> 00:22:22,440 Speaker 2: Yeah? 511 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,320 Speaker 3: I think I wouldn't point the finger at that, but 512 00:22:25,320 --> 00:22:28,480 Speaker 3: what I would tell you is this is that for sure, 513 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:33,240 Speaker 3: because certain conversations weren't had it left an area for gray, 514 00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,800 Speaker 3: and then that gray was left to interpretation, and then 515 00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:40,040 Speaker 3: as a result of that, resentment was built. And two 516 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:42,920 Speaker 3: good people had two different perspectives that couldn't meet in 517 00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:45,880 Speaker 3: the middle on certain things. And so this is now 518 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:49,760 Speaker 3: going into more like therapy than actually finance. But financial 519 00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,560 Speaker 3: circumstances build resentment, and we all know in the therapy 520 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:55,960 Speaker 3: world like resentment leads to massive issues within relationships. It's 521 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:58,760 Speaker 3: like baby paper cuts that don't get taken in care 522 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:02,119 Speaker 3: of become infected. Right, And so I think, like, you know, 523 00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:03,800 Speaker 3: there are a lot of moving parts, but that you know, 524 00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:06,280 Speaker 3: there were a couple of things there that definitely led through. 525 00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:10,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's interesting because, like my fiance and I talked 526 00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:13,240 Speaker 1: about kind of where our priorities lie in terms of money. 527 00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:17,720 Speaker 1: He's very very passionate about private school, like that's really 528 00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:20,000 Speaker 1: important to him. I went to public school my whole 529 00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:22,800 Speaker 1: life really aside from a little couple of years. So 530 00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:25,919 Speaker 1: to me, that's not a priority. I spent probably the 531 00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,280 Speaker 1: equivalent amount of money on appearances, you know, I like 532 00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:30,960 Speaker 1: on my hair, on my nails. When you add it 533 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:32,840 Speaker 1: all up, like and you don't realize, Like I never 534 00:23:32,880 --> 00:23:34,639 Speaker 1: realized any of that stuff until I started adding it 535 00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:39,840 Speaker 1: all up, how much I spend on my hair, nails, clothes, facials, 536 00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:43,320 Speaker 1: you know, like all that stuff that I just do therapy, 537 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:45,320 Speaker 1: you know, Like it all just adds up. And so 538 00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:49,560 Speaker 1: it's like sometimes I think it's having grace for like 539 00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,520 Speaker 1: difference in opinion and a relationship and just kind of understanding, Okay, 540 00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:54,399 Speaker 1: this is your priority, this is my priority. Where do 541 00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:58,080 Speaker 1: we meet in the middle. You have to compromise, And 542 00:23:58,119 --> 00:24:00,119 Speaker 1: so I just think it's it's really really important, and 543 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,760 Speaker 1: I think everybody. So the book is called Talk Money 544 00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:05,439 Speaker 1: to Me, The Eight Essential Financial Questions to discuss with 545 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,720 Speaker 1: your partner. It comes out April second, yep April second, 546 00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:10,080 Speaker 1: So where can everybody pre order it? 547 00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,280 Speaker 3: Yes, you could pre order it on Amazon, Barnes and 548 00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:16,440 Speaker 3: Noble Target. If you go to my Instagram page, it's 549 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:19,840 Speaker 3: on my bio and and everything you said is so 550 00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:22,160 Speaker 3: bang on about just the importance of these stuff, these 551 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 3: conversations like they just have to be had. And you 552 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:27,840 Speaker 3: also think about like the life you want to live, right, 553 00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:28,960 Speaker 3: like you think about retirement. 554 00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:29,240 Speaker 2: Right. 555 00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:32,000 Speaker 3: So a scenario I give people is like when you 556 00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:35,080 Speaker 3: plan for a vacation, like a week vacation, think about 557 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,439 Speaker 3: all the things that go into it. You know your flight, 558 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,560 Speaker 3: what do you bring in, how are you packing? Like 559 00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,439 Speaker 3: all the different parts. When you're planning for retirement, that 560 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:47,160 Speaker 3: is a thirty year vacation, that's over fifteen hundred weeks 561 00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:48,000 Speaker 3: you're planning for. 562 00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:51,000 Speaker 2: And so many of us continue to put that off 563 00:24:51,040 --> 00:24:51,760 Speaker 2: and put that off. 564 00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:55,160 Speaker 3: And it's having right, but it's having conversations like that 565 00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,440 Speaker 3: that allow us to take a step back and say, Okay, 566 00:24:57,720 --> 00:25:00,679 Speaker 3: if I can reduce my spending today, that thirty year 567 00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:03,800 Speaker 3: vacation I go on will be an absolute dream. And 568 00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:05,520 Speaker 3: I do have in this book, I have a benchmark. 569 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:07,680 Speaker 3: So anyone listening people always say, okay, well where should 570 00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:09,760 Speaker 3: I be with retirement? So I'll give you a little 571 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:13,000 Speaker 3: bit of a benchmark here. According to this table in 572 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,840 Speaker 3: my book, if you have household income of i' let's 573 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:18,960 Speaker 3: say one hundred and fifty thousand, and you are what 574 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,400 Speaker 3: would you say your average age of your listener is. 575 00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:24,560 Speaker 1: Thirty three? 576 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,119 Speaker 3: Okay, so we'll round up to this table. We'll do 577 00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:29,159 Speaker 3: thirty we'll do thirty five. So if you have household 578 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,080 Speaker 3: income of one hundred and fifty k and you are 579 00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:34,520 Speaker 3: thirty five years old right now, to give you a benchmark. 580 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,120 Speaker 1: By the way, Jason has calculator out right now, he's 581 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:38,440 Speaker 1: really good, real time. 582 00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:42,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, three hundred and thirty thousand dollars in your retirement 583 00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:44,720 Speaker 3: if you're thirty five with a household income of one 584 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:47,119 Speaker 3: hundred and fifty k. Now, let's take a breather. Not 585 00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 3: everyone's there, So there's another chart in here. So if 586 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:52,320 Speaker 3: you're thirty five years old at one hundred and fifty 587 00:25:53,200 --> 00:25:56,440 Speaker 3: k household income and you don't have that in they're 588 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,160 Speaker 3: saying to catch up, you need to put twenty one 589 00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:03,640 Speaker 3: percent of your income into retirement. So The point here 590 00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:06,520 Speaker 3: between both of these tables is to know where you 591 00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:09,240 Speaker 3: are compared to where you should be, and if you're 592 00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:12,040 Speaker 3: not there, what you could do today to get there. 593 00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:14,399 Speaker 1: Right, That's that's the thing like I and that's the 594 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,000 Speaker 1: thing I struggle with a lot because I'm like, oh, retirement, 595 00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:18,920 Speaker 1: Like I want to live my life now. I'll get 596 00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:20,600 Speaker 1: that when I get to it. But I'm like, I'm 597 00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,520 Speaker 1: starting to feel like it's coming a lot sooner. Like 598 00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:24,600 Speaker 1: life just happens, and it happens fast. 599 00:26:24,359 --> 00:26:25,159 Speaker 2: You know it happened. 600 00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:27,600 Speaker 1: But like there's so much with finances, Like I feel 601 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:31,200 Speaker 1: like it's not just your income, it's not just your spending. 602 00:26:31,320 --> 00:26:34,560 Speaker 1: It's are you investing? Are you keeping money in the 603 00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:36,880 Speaker 1: bank and having it just do nothing for you in there? 604 00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:38,880 Speaker 1: Do you have student loans? 605 00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:39,479 Speaker 3: You know? 606 00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:41,679 Speaker 1: Like there's just so much to it that it feels 607 00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 1: so overwhelming. Yeah, is does the book kind of like 608 00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:48,919 Speaker 1: give people a good like digestible, How do I if 609 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:50,880 Speaker 1: I'm starting at zero? How do I get started? 610 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,560 Speaker 3: It's literally made for that. So it's one oh one 611 00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:56,840 Speaker 3: basic analogies. If you are a financial expert, this book 612 00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,560 Speaker 3: is not for you. If you get like basic basic, 613 00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:01,720 Speaker 3: we gets dumped up with words. I have a it's 614 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,520 Speaker 3: called literally the no bullsh Glossary at the end. So 615 00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:06,480 Speaker 3: it is like the basic one on one to get 616 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:08,000 Speaker 3: you where you need to be and to like know 617 00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:10,199 Speaker 3: everything you got to know to be dangerous with it. 618 00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:12,720 Speaker 3: And I think even like when you think about spending, 619 00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:15,000 Speaker 3: so there's a little equation out there for retirement. You 620 00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,520 Speaker 3: take your annual spence, so whatever you spend annually, and 621 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:20,639 Speaker 3: then you multiply that times twenty to twenty five. So 622 00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:23,199 Speaker 3: let's just say you spend I'm gonna just make this up. 623 00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:25,600 Speaker 3: Doesn't for anyone back home. I'm making it up. You 624 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:28,040 Speaker 3: spend thirty thousand dollars a year on stuff? Okay, I'm 625 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:30,640 Speaker 3: sure it's probably more than that, but you know, let's 626 00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:32,360 Speaker 3: just say, let's just say it's one hundred thousand. We'll 627 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:36,320 Speaker 3: do a clean number. You have to have saved twenty 628 00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,600 Speaker 3: five times that conservatively to retire, so that would be 629 00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:42,240 Speaker 3: two point five million for you to retire and live comfortably. 630 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:45,680 Speaker 3: So when we're thinking today and we're not thinking about retirement, 631 00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:47,280 Speaker 3: a good way to think about it is if I 632 00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:49,240 Speaker 3: spend less. So I just said two point five But 633 00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:52,000 Speaker 3: if we could bring that number down to eighty thousand. 634 00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,680 Speaker 3: You now have to save two million. You just instantly 635 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:57,920 Speaker 3: have to save five hundred thousand less for your retirement 636 00:27:57,920 --> 00:27:59,880 Speaker 3: if you just bring it down twenty percent save. 637 00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:19,720 Speaker 1: I have two rapid fire questions when it comes to 638 00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:22,080 Speaker 1: buying or leasing a car. What would you recommend? 639 00:28:22,320 --> 00:28:25,680 Speaker 3: It depends on the circumstances, because right now it's just changed. 640 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:27,800 Speaker 3: But here's what I would tell you anything with the 641 00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:31,240 Speaker 3: car buying process, do not ever go in there and 642 00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:33,640 Speaker 3: say I have a monthly amount I can spend. Get 643 00:28:33,680 --> 00:28:36,639 Speaker 3: the payment to that amount, because a good salesperson is 644 00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:38,560 Speaker 3: going to be able to structure it so they make 645 00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:41,880 Speaker 3: the most money. But your monthly payment is what it's 646 00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:44,560 Speaker 3: going to be now. The toughest part about your question 647 00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,440 Speaker 3: is two years ago, when cars were appreciing it the 648 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:50,560 Speaker 3: way they were, the answer was lease, But today the 649 00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:54,760 Speaker 3: answer would be use car. But it changes by a used, certified, 650 00:28:54,760 --> 00:28:57,479 Speaker 3: pre owned car is the answer today. That can change 651 00:28:57,520 --> 00:28:58,320 Speaker 3: in a month from. 652 00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:01,320 Speaker 1: Now, because like I was always taught, never lease a car, 653 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:04,480 Speaker 1: buy a car, stop paying rent, buy a home, you know, 654 00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:05,800 Speaker 1: like that type of stuff. And I feel like it 655 00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:07,440 Speaker 1: kind of went the other way for a while, where 656 00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: it was like, don't buy a car lease don't. Now 657 00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:13,640 Speaker 1: it's like, don't buy a house rent you know. I'm like, 658 00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:15,240 Speaker 1: you never know. It's like, I guess you just have 659 00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:18,160 Speaker 1: to really be like tuned into what's on the economy. 660 00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:20,920 Speaker 3: Well, for leasing, when you lease a car, your buyout 661 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 3: value is determined the day you execute the lease. So 662 00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 3: like I actually lease my car for tax purposes because 663 00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 3: the dollar that I could write off, but that amount 664 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:32,320 Speaker 3: the day I leased the car. Three years later, when 665 00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:34,520 Speaker 3: my lease was up, I could have sold the car 666 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:36,920 Speaker 3: for more than the number that was agreed upon three 667 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,720 Speaker 3: years before because of appreciation. So it changes. Here's someone 668 00:29:40,760 --> 00:29:43,280 Speaker 3: you have to have on your podcast. Have to your 669 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:47,320 Speaker 3: listeners will love her. She's the car mom. She has kids, 670 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:49,760 Speaker 3: share her dad owned dealerships. She came out of my 671 00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:53,520 Speaker 3: podcast training Secret shares every little hack that you should 672 00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:55,440 Speaker 3: know if you have kids, when you're consuming when you 673 00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:58,440 Speaker 3: go to dealerships, how to beat them. She's incredible. Now, 674 00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:01,880 Speaker 3: with renting, there's a ratio. People, it's very This one's 675 00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:04,640 Speaker 3: easier to understand. It's called the rent to own ratio. 676 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:08,760 Speaker 3: Because fluctuation of pricing is changing significantly. It is a 677 00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:12,440 Speaker 3: ratio that tells you how many years of your current 678 00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:16,240 Speaker 3: rent you would be renting until you own the house 679 00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:19,400 Speaker 3: based on the price of the house. Okay, so in 680 00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:22,360 Speaker 3: big cities you can rent. Yeah, I mean you could 681 00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:25,120 Speaker 3: rent for fifty years and you still won't own the property, 682 00:30:25,120 --> 00:30:27,160 Speaker 3: like New York City because the values are so high. 683 00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:29,720 Speaker 3: In this book, I have a chart that tells you 684 00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:33,640 Speaker 3: if your rent to own ratio is a certain multiplier, 685 00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,760 Speaker 3: you should be renting or you should be owning it. 686 00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:37,560 Speaker 2: Does that make sense? 687 00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:40,680 Speaker 3: So if you could own your house with what you're 688 00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:43,200 Speaker 3: paying for rent in five to ten years based on 689 00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:45,800 Speaker 3: the value of what the home is, you should not 690 00:30:45,840 --> 00:30:46,320 Speaker 3: be renting. 691 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,280 Speaker 2: You should be buying it, right. 692 00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:50,360 Speaker 3: Because if you rented that place for five to ten years, 693 00:30:50,400 --> 00:30:53,160 Speaker 3: you would owned the property. So there are ratios out there, 694 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:55,520 Speaker 3: like rent to own ratio that can help people. 695 00:30:56,840 --> 00:31:01,560 Speaker 1: One other thing really quick too, are scrubbers A lot 696 00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:05,360 Speaker 1: of them have I'm a blinking on what it's called 697 00:31:06,120 --> 00:31:10,400 Speaker 1: debt from student loans debt? Yeah, how do you go 698 00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,920 Speaker 1: about tackling that in like the best way? 699 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:17,360 Speaker 3: Okay, So anything debt related. First of all, there's good 700 00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:20,720 Speaker 3: debt and there's bad debt. We classify this as good 701 00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:24,240 Speaker 3: debt are tied to things that are appreciating assets, bad 702 00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:27,080 Speaker 3: debt are things that are tied to non appreciating assets. 703 00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,640 Speaker 3: Example of good debt a house. You have a house 704 00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:32,720 Speaker 3: tied to it. History tells us it's appreciating. Bad debt 705 00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:34,920 Speaker 3: credit card debt. When you go by you know, you 706 00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:36,959 Speaker 3: do the hair, the nails, the makeup. You have no 707 00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:40,840 Speaker 3: asset tied to that. So with all these forms of debt, 708 00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:43,920 Speaker 3: what I say is there's an avalanche model. Take an 709 00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:47,120 Speaker 3: Excel file, put all your debt, and then put all 710 00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:50,720 Speaker 3: your interest rate, and whatever your highest interest rate is. 711 00:31:51,120 --> 00:31:52,440 Speaker 2: I need you to take any. 712 00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,560 Speaker 3: Excess cash flow you have after your expenses and pay 713 00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:58,520 Speaker 3: the highest interest rate off first. It likely won't be 714 00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:00,840 Speaker 3: student that if you have credit card debt. Now, credit 715 00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:03,320 Speaker 3: card debts, it's kind of good and bad. If you're 716 00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:05,200 Speaker 3: you know, if you're a surgeon, you're going to We 717 00:32:05,280 --> 00:32:08,560 Speaker 3: know that your likelihood of getting the return on education's high. 718 00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 3: We also know there's a lot of degrees out there 719 00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:13,240 Speaker 3: you're not getting a return. So the overarching theme is 720 00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:16,040 Speaker 3: you have to know how much cash you have after 721 00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:19,440 Speaker 3: your fixed and variable expenses, and then how you're taking 722 00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:21,880 Speaker 3: that cash and applying it to the debt, and there's 723 00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:24,720 Speaker 3: different debt programs and how to pay it back here. 724 00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:27,080 Speaker 3: But what I'll tell people is like, do not wait 725 00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,800 Speaker 3: for a government ballout because they've been talking about it 726 00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:31,680 Speaker 3: forever and it keeps getting pushed. 727 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:34,520 Speaker 2: It keeps getting pushed so much. 728 00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:37,520 Speaker 1: I literally feel like I can talk to you for 729 00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:40,440 Speaker 1: a million years because like there's and I'm like, don't 730 00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:42,360 Speaker 1: even get me started on investments because I could ask you, 731 00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:45,320 Speaker 1: I could probably spend an entire hour going into that. 732 00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:48,239 Speaker 1: I know you have places to be and things to do, 733 00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:50,360 Speaker 1: so I really want to quickly before I let you go. 734 00:32:51,760 --> 00:32:55,200 Speaker 1: Are you moving forward in your next relationship? Is this 735 00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,720 Speaker 1: like a priority for you? Like to have these discussions 736 00:32:57,720 --> 00:32:58,120 Speaker 1: early on? 737 00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:00,840 Speaker 2: Oh at one hundred percent practice what I preach? 738 00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:04,520 Speaker 3: Like that's it's a non starter. 739 00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:06,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, Like all these conversations will be had. 740 00:33:06,840 --> 00:33:08,880 Speaker 3: And again, network's not self with so it's not like 741 00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,880 Speaker 3: if they don't meet a certain level, right, It's like, 742 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:14,800 Speaker 3: these are conversations that must be You're only protecting yourself 743 00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:16,480 Speaker 3: and setting yourself up for success. 744 00:33:16,760 --> 00:33:18,360 Speaker 1: And now you live in Nashville. Do you think you're 745 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:19,960 Speaker 1: going to live in Nashville forever. 746 00:33:20,320 --> 00:33:21,120 Speaker 2: I don't know. 747 00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:23,760 Speaker 3: I don't know, Like I don't think I'm going to 748 00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:24,800 Speaker 3: live in Nashville forever. 749 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:26,200 Speaker 2: So I'm working on that. 750 00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:29,000 Speaker 3: There's a lot of moving parts with the dogs and 751 00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:32,680 Speaker 3: everything else. Yeah, so that's something that's like, you know, 752 00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:34,200 Speaker 3: really top of mind right now. 753 00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:34,600 Speaker 1: Yeah. 754 00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:35,200 Speaker 2: Yeah. 755 00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:38,000 Speaker 3: One thing I'll tell people where they live is I 756 00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:41,640 Speaker 3: call it the third degree priority pro personal financial, professional 757 00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:44,120 Speaker 3: rate one through ten. What that city does for your 758 00:33:44,120 --> 00:33:48,640 Speaker 3: personal happiness, financial gain, and professional success, And based on that, 759 00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:50,400 Speaker 3: determine if it makes sense to live there or not, 760 00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:53,320 Speaker 3: because the city has to give back to you what 761 00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:55,560 Speaker 3: the cost is in one of those three categories. 762 00:33:57,320 --> 00:34:01,240 Speaker 1: Also, our scrubbers need to know because there's rumors that 763 00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:03,600 Speaker 1: you're dating a TikToker named Cat Stickler. 764 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:07,600 Speaker 2: Those rumors, you hear those rumors. 765 00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,520 Speaker 1: Right here are scrubbers. You gotta ask them about dating 766 00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:11,840 Speaker 1: TikToker Cat Stickler. 767 00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:15,920 Speaker 3: Yeah. Here's here's what I'll say to that question, is, like, 768 00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:20,120 Speaker 3: I think, after my last relationship, I'm in the space 769 00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:21,919 Speaker 3: of like kind of keeping things a little bit more 770 00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:22,760 Speaker 3: private right. 771 00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:24,759 Speaker 1: Now because it was so public, Because it was. 772 00:34:24,719 --> 00:34:28,800 Speaker 3: So and there's so much there's a lot that comes 773 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:31,840 Speaker 3: with that good and bad and so like the whole 774 00:34:32,640 --> 00:34:35,799 Speaker 3: the whole dating aspect, which I'm relatively new to. I'm like, 775 00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:37,880 Speaker 3: you know what, for right now today, I'm going to 776 00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:39,480 Speaker 3: kind of keep things private. 777 00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:40,840 Speaker 1: Until it becomes more serious. 778 00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:44,239 Speaker 3: Yeah, until things become yeah yeah, but right now, I'm 779 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:48,760 Speaker 3: keeping things a little private, keeping things private. 780 00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:55,600 Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, you know that that's me. I'm doing my. 781 00:34:55,560 --> 00:34:58,239 Speaker 3: Thing, not keeping things private. This is the place I'll 782 00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:00,320 Speaker 3: come back to and then we'll talk all about it. 783 00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:00,680 Speaker 1: Okay. 784 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:01,640 Speaker 3: I get it. 785 00:35:01,719 --> 00:35:03,920 Speaker 1: I totally get it because when I was dating, like 786 00:35:03,960 --> 00:35:07,200 Speaker 1: when I was just like you know, dating and a 787 00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:10,440 Speaker 1: rapid pace, I was like, you get you know, like 788 00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:13,040 Speaker 1: when you are public about it, then there's expectation put 789 00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,080 Speaker 1: on it, and so then you kind of weirdly feel 790 00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:17,759 Speaker 1: like you're like letting people down, letting yourself down, but 791 00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:19,640 Speaker 1: you're just dating. Like that's what dating is. Like, you 792 00:35:19,640 --> 00:35:21,240 Speaker 1: go out with someone a couple of times, it doesn't 793 00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:24,400 Speaker 1: work out, but I think that there's there's this expectation. 794 00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:26,080 Speaker 1: It does kind of make you feel a certain type 795 00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:28,000 Speaker 1: of way. So I do understand that. Yeah, sure, but 796 00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:30,560 Speaker 1: I've heard this cat Stickler is a good girl. 797 00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:34,480 Speaker 3: She's coming on my podcast actually, and she's a great girl. 798 00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,480 Speaker 2: She's amazing, she's very special, she's awesome, she's great. 799 00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:40,480 Speaker 1: Did you come on your podcast or she's great. 800 00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:42,960 Speaker 3: I interviewed her in Chicago at the episode's coming out 801 00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:43,960 Speaker 3: like a few weeks or so. 802 00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:47,239 Speaker 1: Is that how you met or No, No, we met prior. 803 00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:49,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, we met prior. Yeah, we met prior. 804 00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:59,399 Speaker 1: I'm trying to. I'm trying to. We need to getting 805 00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:01,759 Speaker 1: the wraps. No, No, you know, I love you, and 806 00:36:01,760 --> 00:36:04,040 Speaker 1: so I respect I respect your privacy obviously have to 807 00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,399 Speaker 1: ask and people want to know. But I think I'm 808 00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:09,200 Speaker 1: really I love what you're doing, and I really want 809 00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:11,279 Speaker 1: to encourage you everybody listening to get the book. It's 810 00:36:11,280 --> 00:36:14,720 Speaker 1: called Talk Money to Me. They eight essential financial questions 811 00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:17,680 Speaker 1: to discuss with your partner. It comes out April second, 812 00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:20,480 Speaker 1: and you have the link in your bio. 813 00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:21,920 Speaker 3: I'm asson, Yeah, the link in my bio. And the 814 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:23,560 Speaker 3: other thing too, is we're on a book tour right 815 00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:26,320 Speaker 3: now with Capital One. They're sponsoring a Capital One cafe. 816 00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:34,040 Speaker 3: So did Denver, Austin, Philly, Chicago, del Rey, Boston, and 817 00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:35,680 Speaker 3: then I think we're going to add I don't know 818 00:36:35,719 --> 00:36:37,279 Speaker 3: if I said DC, but DC and then we're going 819 00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,120 Speaker 3: to probably add New York in Nashville, so that's exciting. 820 00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:43,320 Speaker 1: So everybody, if you're in those cities, go out meet Jason. 821 00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:46,920 Speaker 1: Tell them you're a scrubber. Send your love and thank 822 00:36:46,960 --> 00:36:47,839 Speaker 1: you so much for being here. 823 00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:49,799 Speaker 3: I love the Scrubbers. I love you guys. Thank you 824 00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:50,560 Speaker 3: guys for having me. 825 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,520 Speaker 1: Thank you all right, Ethan, what'd you think? 826 00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:56,479 Speaker 4: I love Jason Tarctick. I just love him so much. 827 00:36:56,640 --> 00:37:00,319 Speaker 4: I do too, And you know, we don't have these 828 00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:03,160 Speaker 4: kind of conversations enough, and so I think it's so 829 00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:05,640 Speaker 4: important to me to destigmatize this. 830 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:07,239 Speaker 2: It makes you feel so comfortable about that. 831 00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:09,200 Speaker 1: I do too. And I think that like, obviously he's 832 00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:11,759 Speaker 1: a financial expert, so he maybe sometimes can get a 833 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:14,160 Speaker 1: little in the weeds of things that may seem overwhelming 834 00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:16,799 Speaker 1: to you because they were overwhelming to me. But I 835 00:37:16,840 --> 00:37:19,680 Speaker 1: think at the end of the day, we all deal 836 00:37:19,840 --> 00:37:23,560 Speaker 1: with finances, you know, how to save, how to spend 837 00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:28,040 Speaker 1: income versus expenses, investing, what's smart what's not. And I 838 00:37:28,120 --> 00:37:32,160 Speaker 1: just think being involved in the conversation, having those conversations, 839 00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:34,880 Speaker 1: you know, like, are just so important. What you know 840 00:37:34,920 --> 00:37:39,000 Speaker 1: you were saying, somebody asked you what is being rich 841 00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:41,000 Speaker 1: mean to you? Right? Was it that? 842 00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:41,399 Speaker 2: Yeah? 843 00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:43,440 Speaker 4: Yeah, there was. I don't have his name in front 844 00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,120 Speaker 4: of me, but there's a guy who had on another 845 00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:48,440 Speaker 4: podcast and he was talking about like what, like what 846 00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:50,960 Speaker 4: what is being rich? Like what does that mean to you? 847 00:37:51,080 --> 00:37:52,600 Speaker 4: And like for some people it's like, oh, I want 848 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,080 Speaker 4: to like a big house and I want a nice car, 849 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:57,880 Speaker 4: and uh, he said to him, it's going to the 850 00:37:57,880 --> 00:38:00,360 Speaker 4: grocery store and not looking at what food can just 851 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:03,879 Speaker 4: getting getting whatever I want and like not really caring. Yeah, 852 00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:08,000 Speaker 4: and I that really changed, like how I look at 853 00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:11,040 Speaker 4: how I spend money and how I save and like 854 00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:13,200 Speaker 4: the goals I have because I was thinking about that, 855 00:38:13,239 --> 00:38:14,480 Speaker 4: and I'm like, because I you know, I don't really 856 00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:16,360 Speaker 4: I don't need like a vault full of gold coins 857 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:19,719 Speaker 4: like Screege McDuck has, but like, yeah, you know, like 858 00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:21,520 Speaker 4: being able to take a vacation a couple of times 859 00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:23,640 Speaker 4: a year, Like that's to me, that's that's rich. 860 00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:26,239 Speaker 1: And the thing is too, it's all relative, you know, 861 00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:28,719 Speaker 1: it's all what matters to you. You could maybe want 862 00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:31,080 Speaker 1: to live in a smaller home and take more vacations 863 00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:33,040 Speaker 1: in a year, or if you don't really care about vacations, 864 00:38:33,080 --> 00:38:34,720 Speaker 1: you just want to live in a big, lavish home, 865 00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:36,840 Speaker 1: then that's more important to you, if you you know 866 00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:38,279 Speaker 1: what I mean. Like, it's kind of just figuring out 867 00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,160 Speaker 1: what's important to you, how you want to live your life, 868 00:38:40,239 --> 00:38:41,799 Speaker 1: where you want to spend your money, where you want 869 00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:44,239 Speaker 1: to save it, And it's different for everybody. So I 870 00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:47,879 Speaker 1: feel like that's what makes the conversation so interesting. And 871 00:38:48,080 --> 00:38:50,360 Speaker 1: I again, like I was telling Jason, I talked to 872 00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:52,439 Speaker 1: a lot of my friends, especially friends who are in 873 00:38:52,960 --> 00:38:56,520 Speaker 1: relationships with other people with kids and stuff, because the 874 00:38:56,520 --> 00:39:01,640 Speaker 1: conversation is very it's different, and so I just I 875 00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:05,640 Speaker 1: want to encourage everybody listening to have those conversations. It's 876 00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:07,879 Speaker 1: not weird. Talk to your friends about it, see how 877 00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:10,880 Speaker 1: they do it, what they're planning on doing, just so 878 00:39:10,920 --> 00:39:13,279 Speaker 1: that you're more aware of kind of different ways to 879 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:13,760 Speaker 1: do things. 880 00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:16,520 Speaker 4: Money, whether we like it or not, money is a 881 00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:19,759 Speaker 4: part of our lives. Everybody has to think about it 882 00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 4: and deal with it. And it's not It doesn't have 883 00:39:22,120 --> 00:39:23,880 Speaker 4: to be weird. You can just you know, if you 884 00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:26,560 Speaker 4: have anxieties about it, like if you talk to your 885 00:39:26,600 --> 00:39:28,840 Speaker 4: loved ones or your friends, yeah you feel better about it. 886 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, I love listening to podcasts about it too, Like 887 00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:32,799 Speaker 1: I listened to Lewis Howe's a lot because I think 888 00:39:32,880 --> 00:39:35,200 Speaker 1: he has a lot of financial experts on and they 889 00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:36,799 Speaker 1: say a lot of things that I never really thought 890 00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:38,880 Speaker 1: about before. So I just want to encourage you to 891 00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:42,879 Speaker 1: have that conversation and just love Jason Tarctic. And I'm 892 00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:46,040 Speaker 1: gonna say, based off his body language, he's not single. 893 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:50,960 Speaker 1: Yeah I would say that too. Yeah, I got a 894 00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:54,000 Speaker 1: little for me, but you know, respect, respect the privacy. 895 00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:57,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, so we love Jason and his significant other who 896 00:39:57,600 --> 00:39:58,759 Speaker 4: may or may not exist. 897 00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:02,080 Speaker 1: Yes, exactly. We love you and talk to you guys later. 898 00:40:02,719 --> 00:40:13,880 Speaker 2: Bye. Mhm.