Speaker 1: Help We Suck At Being Newlyweds?
Speaker 2: With Dean Hungler, Kaylen Miller Keys, and Jared Haven an
Speaker 2: iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 3: What is going on? Everyone?
Speaker 1: Welcome to an all new episode of Help We Suck
Speaker 1: At Being Newlyweds? As always, my name is Ten Hungler,
Speaker 1: joined in the studio by the lovely Kaylin Miller Keys,
Speaker 1: and somewhere in the world Jared Haven is joining us.
Speaker 1: Looks like he's in his coffee shop, sitting in the closet.
Speaker 4: Yep, pretty much in my dungeon, surrounded by first aid kids,
Speaker 4: some money, not much, and like just an assortment of
Speaker 4: staples and paper clips.
Speaker 1: Is that where we would go if we were to
Speaker 1: rob you? And then we would say, take us to
Speaker 1: the money, and then you would take us into this closet.
Speaker 5: Yes, I would.
Speaker 4: First of all, it's not a closet, it's an office,
Speaker 4: get it right, that's the size of a closet. But
Speaker 4: I would, yeah, I'd escore you back here and then
Speaker 4: open the safe, which probably has like one hundred and
Speaker 4: fifty dollars in it, So I mean, you know, go ahead, Yeah,
Speaker 4: and that's where you'd go. Yeah, you'd see this while
Speaker 4: wearing a mask and potentially holding a weapon and holding
Speaker 4: me up.
Speaker 1: Well that's great man, good to know for whenever we
Speaker 1: come to visit. I do want to say to our
Speaker 1: listeners out there, I know you guys are super angry
Speaker 1: at us, like super super angry at us because because
Speaker 1: we're a day late posting this episode. Yeah, and hey,
Speaker 1: I get it. Your your complaints are warranted and we
Speaker 1: hear them, and you should be angry at us. But
Speaker 1: just know that we did everything we could.
Speaker 4: So yeah, well, well you guys are sick pretty much
Speaker 4: who got sick?
Speaker 2: I was sick and I had a cold that turned
Speaker 2: into an ear infection, and ear infections as an adult
Speaker 2: are so brutal because you get fur to goo and
Speaker 2: I was in bed for a full twenty four hours,
Speaker 2: couldn't get up Ortherwise, I felt like I was going
Speaker 2: to pass out, so couldn't record.
Speaker 6: It's my fault.
Speaker 5: Is it crazy?
Speaker 4: How like a cold turns into an air infection that
Speaker 4: turns into some sort of virus that turns into this.
Speaker 4: I've always just thought that's the most insane thing.
Speaker 2: Where it's just a runny nose and then it evolves
Speaker 2: into something me not being able to get.
Speaker 1: Out of bed, I think it was a combination for
Speaker 1: Kaitlin of I was sick earlier in the week because
Speaker 1: I was camping in cold weather and I already had
Speaker 1: a tickle, and then it just kind of got a
Speaker 1: little bit worse, and so I was like, I was
Speaker 1: like kind of sick for like four or five days.
Speaker 1: We flew to Bali with me being sick. And it
Speaker 1: stinks being on an airplane when you have a cold.
Speaker 1: Because obviously we knew it wasn't COVID, that we got
Speaker 1: COVID tests before we left.
Speaker 4: Still, you don't want to be the one coffin and
Speaker 4: sneezing on a plane.
Speaker 1: Yeah, But even in addition to like the public scrutiny
Speaker 1: that you feel like you're receiving, just like blowing your
Speaker 1: nose on an airplane, it's so it sucks because you
Speaker 1: need so many napkins and you don't have immediate access
Speaker 1: to a trash can, and so you're just like blowing
Speaker 1: and stashing it somewhere, blowing stashing it somewhere.
Speaker 4: We know exactly where you're stashing it, bros. Where I
Speaker 4: stashed it too, that little pouch in the in the
Speaker 4: seat in front of me.
Speaker 1: No, I think we avoid that I was stashing on
Speaker 1: the floor and that's really much. And every time I
Speaker 1: went to the bathroom, I would bring him to the
Speaker 1: bathroom and then you had a Okay, So I was sick.
Speaker 1: On the way there, Kaylen was totally fine, and then
Speaker 1: on the at near the end of the trip, Kaylen
Speaker 1: started getting really sick, and then I was fine, and
Speaker 1: then so she was sick on the way home. And
Speaker 1: I do think that being sick and then going on
Speaker 1: an airplane only like magnifies your sickness. And I think
Speaker 1: that's where your ear issue came from.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I felt like my ear drums were going
Speaker 2: to burst on the plane. I've never felt such horrible
Speaker 2: pain in my ears because I was so congested and
Speaker 2: my ears couldn't pop. So I think that's where the
Speaker 2: ear infection developed. And it sucked. And so on the
Speaker 2: way there, Dean we had the exit row, so we
Speaker 2: had no one in front of us. Deane could just
Speaker 2: like go off into the bathroom. On the way back,
Speaker 2: there's like windows and then like the middle aisle. We
Speaker 2: were in the middle, so I had to like get people.
Speaker 2: People'll get up every time I wanted to go bowl
Speaker 2: my nose. No I just felt so bad the whole plane.
Speaker 2: And it was a fourteen hour flight and then five
Speaker 2: hours Taiwan, so it was brutal.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were in the middle.
Speaker 1: You know how some planes there's three seats on the outside,
Speaker 1: four seats in the middle, and then three seats on
Speaker 1: the outside.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you guys were on a big boy.
Speaker 1: We were on the two seats in the middle. Both
Speaker 1: of us were in the middle, and I was kind
Speaker 1: of bummed about it at first, but those seats were
Speaker 1: super comfortable. But their person next to me was gone,
Speaker 1: so you just had to crawl over me every time.
Speaker 3: It was an ideal by any stretch of the imagination.
Speaker 2: It wasn't ideal, but okay, So it was a fourteen
Speaker 2: hour plane, right. The person sitting next to Dean disappeared
Speaker 2: for nine hours, and then at the very end of
Speaker 2: the flight she could just came back.
Speaker 6: I don't know where she went.
Speaker 1: Yeah, who knows it was Did you ever get nervous?
Speaker 4: Nervous like like she's trying to get into the cockpit.
Speaker 1: She's breaking into the engine bay.
Speaker 4: It's immediately when I think, as soon as I am
Speaker 4: that guy that is always on high alert if I
Speaker 4: see somebody's stand up, dude, Like if I see as
Speaker 4: soon as the bell ring when I don't know if
Speaker 4: it rings when you're at like ten thousand feet, but
Speaker 4: the seatbelt sign is still on as soon the first
Speaker 4: person that gets up, I am staring at until they
Speaker 4: go inside the bathroom.
Speaker 1: They got ibs or.
Speaker 3: No we did.
Speaker 1: We didn't really worry too much about that. But then,
Speaker 1: sorry not to make a long story longer than it
Speaker 1: needs to be. So Kaylin's been sick. I have had
Speaker 1: like the most insane biological clock adjustment that I've ever
Speaker 1: had traveling to anywhere in my entire life. Like the
Speaker 1: first day we got back, I don't think what, like,
Speaker 1: can you help me explain it? Because I did? Did
Speaker 1: I not sleep the first night?
Speaker 6: And then yeah, you didn't sleep at all the first night?
Speaker 1: I think I stayed awake until like three or four
Speaker 1: am the first night we got back, and then I
Speaker 1: finally fell asleep, and then I slept in the next
Speaker 1: day until four pm, and so then I woke up
Speaker 1: at four pm, like I came down to Alistairs, to
Speaker 1: the living room and slept in Alistair's bed for like
Speaker 1: four hours too. I came I came to get ready
Speaker 1: for bed that night too, and I was like, well,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be able to sleep tonight, so what
Speaker 1: do I do? So I took three night quills to
Speaker 1: try to knock me out so that way I could
Speaker 1: get back onto normal sleeping schedule. And then I couldn't sleep,
Speaker 1: and then I couldn't sleep until one am that day,
Speaker 1: fell asleep until one am that day, and then I
Speaker 1: didn't wake up the next day until noon. And it's
Speaker 1: there's no worse feeling in the world when it's the
Speaker 1: weekend or whatever and you sleep in until noon or
Speaker 1: like one pm.
Speaker 3: I think I slept until one pm.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's probably before. It's just like you feel like
Speaker 1: such a waste, you feel.
Speaker 4: Like you Let's be honest with ourselves, we feel like
Speaker 4: pieces dude every time. That's why, like I can't go
Speaker 4: out anymore.
Speaker 5: I don't.
Speaker 4: I genuinely don't want to go out anymore because I
Speaker 4: would rather wake up early in the morning and get
Speaker 4: things done rather than stay out late and have fun.
Speaker 4: I am at that stage in my life.
Speaker 3: One hundred percent.
Speaker 1: Even this morning, I woke up, I went to bed
Speaker 1: at midnight, I turn everything off at midnight, went to bed,
Speaker 1: why are you looking at me like this?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 1: And then I woke up at six as the sun
Speaker 1: was rising, and I was like, okay, great six hours.
Speaker 1: I can function off for six hours, wide awake for
Speaker 1: an hour and a half, and then I like lay
Speaker 1: back down and I'm fully back asleep, like sleeping harder
Speaker 1: than I had over the first six hours of sleep.
Speaker 3: And then I wake up two hours before this podcast,
Speaker 3: and I'm.
Speaker 1: Like, it's ten am. It's so early, but it's not early.
Speaker 4: It's ten am.
Speaker 1: I feel so I feel so helpless.
Speaker 2: You just got to get back on a correct schedule.
Speaker 2: Go to bed earlier.
Speaker 1: Oh, go to better earlier, says the girl watching suits
Speaker 1: until midnight.
Speaker 6: No, only because you were playing video games until midnight.
Speaker 1: I well, I was only playing video games because you
Speaker 1: were watching suits.
Speaker 5: I think it's the hair.
Speaker 4: I think the hair is just making you a like
Speaker 4: you just look like a guy that's just smoke smokes
Speaker 4: weed all like you're gonna come up to me at
Speaker 4: the beach and just start speaking in a Jamaican accent
Speaker 4: and try to, you know, sit down with me and
Speaker 4: smoke weed, keep a scuba rubin. Exactly. It's exactly what
Speaker 4: I was thinking was Hankin's area, and along came Bolly.
Speaker 1: Yeah, actually, I'm gonna take a second to put it
Speaker 1: up because it's kind of just suffocating me a little
Speaker 1: bit right now.
Speaker 6: So just just wanted to show off your flow for
Speaker 6: a bit, just I.
Speaker 1: Wanted everyone to laugh at me and achieved it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, you got that. I didn't think anyone was
Speaker 1: actually really gonna notice it, but.
Speaker 4: You guys were really selling me on selling all of
Speaker 4: us the audience members on a trip to Bali by
Speaker 4: the way, like sounds.
Speaker 2: Great, honestly, Okay, getting sick aside, it was so much fun.
Speaker 2: We got there and I was pretty I was honestly
Speaker 2: dreading the trip because it was a trip with a.
Speaker 6: Bunch of strangers.
Speaker 2: People that follow us on Instagram came and I was
Speaker 2: super excited when I booked the trip. That's why I
Speaker 2: did it. And then my friends got in my head
Speaker 2: They're like, what if a stalker shows up? Like you're
Speaker 2: pretty introverted, are you sure you can do this? And
Speaker 2: so then I started to get anxiety and I was like, shoot,
Speaker 2: maybe I can't do this. And so when we talked
Speaker 2: to you guys last week, that was before we had
Speaker 2: met anyone. So we met everyone that night and everyone
Speaker 2: was so cool. We had so much fun with them.
Speaker 2: And the way the trip worked is they planned a
Speaker 2: lot of downtime for us to like be to ourselves
Speaker 2: and like decompress, and we took that time just to
Speaker 2: hang out with everyone still because we had so much
Speaker 2: fun with them.
Speaker 6: So it really was a good trip. I had a blasting.
Speaker 5: Yeah, what was your favorite part.
Speaker 2: We got tattoos for our four year anniversary.
Speaker 6: That was pretty fun.
Speaker 5: Did you guys get him in the same exact location?
Speaker 1: No, mean the same thing?
Speaker 6: Yeah, we didn't. Mine is for us jeans wasn't well.
Speaker 1: I got I got a Pokemon on my leg and
Speaker 1: then we were sitting there.
Speaker 2: No, no, we were sitting We were like god, it
Speaker 2: was our last night out. And one of the girls
Speaker 2: she was so much fun, her named Savannah. Want to
Speaker 2: get her on the Bachelor, by the way, she would
Speaker 2: be so good on the show a bachelorette.
Speaker 6: Yes.
Speaker 2: Somehow she found a guy to come to our hotel
Speaker 2: at three am to give us all tattoos. So we
Speaker 2: were up until like three four am, all getting tattoos,
Speaker 2: and Dean got a Pokemon, I got a bell pepper,
Speaker 2: which I've been wanting for a long time. I feel
Speaker 2: like a standard bell is just lame. So I was like,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna get a bell pepper to signify changing my
Speaker 2: last name.
Speaker 6: And then Dean was like sweet.
Speaker 4: I was curious about where the bell pepper came from.
Speaker 4: I'm like, are you growing a garden? The bell thing.
Speaker 3: Is very sweet?
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I was like a bell. I could get
Speaker 2: a literal bell, but that's pretty boring.
Speaker 1: And then you just get the word bell.
Speaker 6: Still boring.
Speaker 5: You get tinker Oh.
Speaker 1: Oh, I like that nice.
Speaker 3: I'll do that, actually, Tinker, I'll just get tinker.
Speaker 6: Yeah. I like Tinker.
Speaker 3: Like that tinker Bell, like the actual picture of tinker Bell.
Speaker 5: Oh. Easton had a good recommendation Taco.
Speaker 7: Oh.
Speaker 1: My brother is expecting their first kid, I think maybe tomorrow,
Speaker 1: and they said they're going to in their baby taco
Speaker 1: Taco Bell because they're Ross and Avery Bell, so it'd
Speaker 1: be taco bell.
Speaker 3: Anyways, what were you saying?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 2: And so then at four am, this other girl, Sarah
Speaker 2: was like, Dean, you should get something to match Kalem tattoo.
Speaker 6: Get an onion.
Speaker 2: And Jan's like, okay, I'm gonna get an onion and
Speaker 2: just put an onion on his body.
Speaker 1: I love onions and that's.
Speaker 6: Our four am tattoo story.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so what are you getting naked again?
Speaker 6: This is his onion?
Speaker 4: Oh you got it on the inside of your knee.
Speaker 4: Was that painful?
Speaker 3: I don't really.
Speaker 6: We were all pretty tipsy.
Speaker 4: I can't imagine getting tattoos and bali at three in
Speaker 4: the morning. You guys were completely sober.
Speaker 6: You know, there's this Pokemon.
Speaker 5: What Pokemon is it?
Speaker 4: Ma?
Speaker 6: What is it?
Speaker 3: The magic harp?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Sweet magic?
Speaker 5: That looks cool.
Speaker 1: It's the most useless Pokemon in the Pokey decks, and
Speaker 1: I thought it'd be pretty funny because I often feel
Speaker 1: like I'm pretty useless.
Speaker 3: So we got in common.
Speaker 1: I wanted to get like a sick, fierce, like really
Speaker 1: powerful Pokemon because I love Pokemon. I actually really wanted
Speaker 1: to get a jolty on because they're so cute. They're
Speaker 1: like little electric dogs. But I just feel like, if
Speaker 1: you that's like it's just getting a tattoo like that,
Speaker 1: you're basically saying like, I'm a tough guy, I'm strong,
Speaker 1: and I just kind of always scoff at people like
Speaker 1: those kinds of tattoos.
Speaker 4: Even if it's a Pokemon, you would never get a
Speaker 4: Pikachu or anything.
Speaker 1: Pikachu would be really good, but Pikachu's just it's too
Speaker 1: like general, too generic, too mainstream, I think, to to mainstream.
Speaker 1: Not many people are gonna have magic car tattoos.
Speaker 3: I'll tell you what right now. Yeah, so we got tattoos.
Speaker 3: Where were we? Is that what were left off?
Speaker 2: Yeah? We got tattoos and then we left the next
Speaker 2: day and I get a text in our group chat
Speaker 2: and they're like, the tattoo guys back. So then they
Speaker 2: got even more tattoos. Savannah got her very first tattoo
Speaker 2: and got four in Bali, and then a.
Speaker 6: Couple of the other girls got a few as well.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we were getting.
Speaker 6: Wow, it was so fun.
Speaker 5: So if we're so bonding, if.
Speaker 1: We ever lead a trip again, you know what's in
Speaker 1: store for you getting tattooed.
Speaker 7: Us at four you you know what you guys should
Speaker 7: do because it's such you guys, and you know how
Speaker 7: everybody has parting gifts at weddings like thank you for
Speaker 7: coming and then they give you like, dude, you should
Speaker 7: have a tattoo artist.
Speaker 1: Okay, we've been.
Speaker 2: Trying to do this, but we need to find someone
Speaker 2: that's okay. My first tattoo I got like forty minutes
Speaker 2: from our wedding venue. So we're going to see if
Speaker 2: he could come out maybe, but they're expensive.
Speaker 1: He talks about hiring a tattooartist for our wedding.
Speaker 4: If you guys, get a tattoo artist at your wedding,
Speaker 4: I have no tattoos.
Speaker 5: I will get a tattoo at your wedding. I will
Speaker 5: get a tattoo.
Speaker 1: I want to ask you what you're going to get,
Speaker 1: but I already know exactly what it is.
Speaker 4: Well, I'm sure the guy is limited. He's not going
Speaker 4: to do whatever I want. M he'd probably do like
Speaker 4: a fly, like a flash tat size. I mean no,
Speaker 4: like I mean, tattoos are pretty quick. But obviously you're
Speaker 4: not gonna get a big piece there. What would you get?
Speaker 4: I don't know. I mean, obviously it would be something
Speaker 4: to do with, you know, Superman, or it.
Speaker 1: Was gonna be I was gonna say the S with
Speaker 1: the dime.
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna say Brady, because what if I gotta
Speaker 4: have this? Because I could have him do the TV
Speaker 4: twelve sign, But he probably doesn't even know what that is,
Speaker 4: so he would probably have to do something that he
Speaker 4: knows already or that's pretty mainstream, which is gonna go
Speaker 4: against everything Dean believes in. But if we're at a
Speaker 4: wedding and you know, time is of the essence and
Speaker 4: everybody else is geting tattoos, yeah, something something that was
Speaker 4: meaningful to me. But also, oh dude, you know what
Speaker 4: I'll get what help we suck at being newlyweds?
Speaker 1: Nice? Oh yeah, that's perfect. I wouldn't think that it
Speaker 1: would be like there wouldn't be like a small window
Speaker 1: to get a tattoo. I would think like he could
Speaker 1: be there all day from sun up to sundown, like
Speaker 1: four hours. But you know what I mean, not even
Speaker 1: like like ten hours from lunch until we go to bed.
Speaker 6: I can't afford that.
Speaker 1: It's not like we're paying him by the hour, just
Speaker 1: we're paying him for the experience. I don't know, you're wrong,
Speaker 1: I have no idea what I'm saying. But anyway, so
Speaker 1: that way no one feels rushed to like get and
Speaker 1: get out. You can kind of like go in there wandering,
Speaker 1: get a tattoo, and the tattoo ten at sometimes and
Speaker 1: then walk out and then you could show it off
Speaker 1: to everyone and then like three hours later someone could
Speaker 1: see your Sickney Superman tattoo.
Speaker 2: We have to make this happen. We just need to
Speaker 2: find someone who's affordable. This guy was super affordable, but
Speaker 2: it was BALI.
Speaker 3: He was great.
Speaker 1: He was normally, honestly, I love that. Normally, when you
Speaker 1: get a tattoo, you like show the tattoo artists what
Speaker 1: you want and then they'll print it out and then
Speaker 1: they'll like they'll they'll stamp it on you like a
Speaker 1: little tattoo and then they'll just trace this tattoo so
Speaker 1: they can't like mess up or anything. That this guy,
Speaker 1: I was just like, hey, I want this magic harp?
Speaker 1: Can you can you put this on me? And so
Speaker 1: he like held my phone out and then on the
Speaker 1: paper right next to it just kind of like eyeballed
Speaker 1: it and drew it and it was an exact replica.
Speaker 1: Same with crazy.
Speaker 6: I've never seen someone freehand tattoos like that.
Speaker 1: And this guy had zero reviews on Google.
Speaker 6: No way, I didn't know that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he zero.
Speaker 3: I was like, how'd you find this guy?
Speaker 1: And she was like, well, all of the places with
Speaker 1: reviews didn't answer, And so I called this guy with
Speaker 1: zero reviews, and he said, I'll be there in five minutes.
Speaker 6: Shut up.
Speaker 5: He was so good.
Speaker 6: One of the best tattoo artists ever.
Speaker 1: Well, one of your best tattoos you ever experienced.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I wish so badly that in the moment you
Speaker 4: when he drew that picture, you were like, dude, it's
Speaker 4: a replica.
Speaker 5: It so good.
Speaker 4: And then you wake up the next morning and you
Speaker 4: realize that you were a drunk looking at this picture,
Speaker 4: and then it's like a stick figure.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, story not story my life, but that
Speaker 1: definitely happened to me before.
Speaker 4: And also, I was thinking about the onion tattoo on you, Dean.
Speaker 4: That really represents you pretty well. I mean, yes, you
Speaker 4: do love onions, but also onions have layers, Dean, you
Speaker 4: have tons of layers. They stink, Dean, sometimes just stink stink. Hm.
Speaker 1: Basically, what we were saying was it I'm a lot
Speaker 1: like Shrek. Shrek loves it exactly interesting.
Speaker 6: I don't remember that part.
Speaker 1: Well, that's kind of how I was always like this.
Speaker 1: You really never cut onto that. I was always describing
Speaker 1: it from my perspective as me being Shrek in the
Speaker 1: movie Shrek.
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's talking to Donkey.
Speaker 4: He's like, oh goods, I like onions.
Speaker 1: You don't remember that far.
Speaker 6: No Shrek, I've seen it so many times.
Speaker 1: I just forget that one brek from the cult classic
Speaker 1: movie Shrek.
Speaker 5: I tried to have it.
Speaker 4: Dawson watched Shrek a few months ago, and he's not
Speaker 4: ready for it.
Speaker 5: He's not ready for it.
Speaker 4: He's watched for like ten minutes, but then afterwards he
Speaker 4: was just that movie.
Speaker 1: Came out when we were like, I probably wrong with this,
Speaker 1: but like around when we were ten, we weren't ready one.
Speaker 1: We weren't ready for it, and yeah, so ten exactly,
Speaker 1: we weren't ready for it until we were like maybe
Speaker 1: fully matured adult, like teenagers adults. That movie still holds up,
Speaker 1: like you could watch that movie with Dawson and still
Speaker 1: probably laugh your ass off.
Speaker 4: Oh I do, because we put it on and I
Speaker 4: was like, this movie is definitely more for me than
Speaker 4: for Dawson, but hopefully he gets some entertainment out of it.
Speaker 5: And then he got like ten minutes of.
Speaker 4: It, and then of course he was fussy, and I'm like, bro,
Speaker 4: I'm trying to watch the movie. Relax, and then you know,
Speaker 4: obviously we have to shut it off, put Miss Rachel
Speaker 4: back on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was gonna ask what's his favorite movie?
Speaker 4: He doesn't really watch movies. He can't sit down and watch,
Speaker 4: you know, but he watches Sesame Street. He'll watch Miss Rachel,
Speaker 4: which is a YouTube channel. She's like a she's a teacher.
Speaker 4: She's like the fad now and she educates them a lot,
Speaker 4: which is great. And yeah, those are the big two
Speaker 4: Sesame Street, Miss Rachel, who Miss.
Speaker 1: Rachel is Brad's kid is super into Miss Rachel. Do
Speaker 1: you ever try to like And I have no idea
Speaker 1: what it's like to raise a kid, obviously, and I
Speaker 1: know that Miss Rachel is a hit with the kids.
Speaker 1: Do you ever try to get him into like advanced
Speaker 1: like STEM because there are certain I see it on
Speaker 1: TikTok for some reason every once in a while, like
Speaker 1: instead of showing your kid Miss Rachel, show your kid
Speaker 1: this advanced thing instead, and they will have a higher
Speaker 1: IQ when they're older.
Speaker 3: Do you ever try to show them?
Speaker 4: No, not yet, Honestly I try to. If you mean
Speaker 4: showing him higher IRQ stuff like teenage Mutnam Turtles two
Speaker 4: Secret to the Ooze, then yeah, I try to show
Speaker 4: him that and get him into those things. But uh no,
Speaker 4: I he's just like it's just colors and numbers. He
Speaker 4: can't understand anything. Like, he definitely learns a little bit
Speaker 4: from Miss Rachel.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 4: She like the words, you know, and he recognizes the
Speaker 4: songs because every time we start singing a song that
Speaker 4: from Miss Rachel, he like smiles and like starts going
Speaker 4: back and forth. But yeah, I mean he'll he'll get there.
Speaker 4: He'll well, we'll get him to be smart.
Speaker 3: No, I'm sure he will be.
Speaker 1: I'm just asking because I have no no bearing for
Speaker 1: what it's like to raise a kid.
Speaker 3: Obviously.
Speaker 1: Did you ever see that There was this TikTok ad
Speaker 1: that I always get where it's like a baby booklet
Speaker 1: with like buttons in it, and it was like, if
Speaker 1: you want your kid to grow up to be a
Speaker 1: software developer, this is what you should get them at
Speaker 1: an early age, all right.
Speaker 3: And my brother is a software developer.
Speaker 1: So I was like, graad, you have to get this
Speaker 1: for your baby, and he's like ha ha, sure, like
Speaker 1: never gave it any really of it, never a second thought.
Speaker 1: He's like, dude, our baby loves Miss Rachel. She's going
Speaker 1: to keep loving Miss Rachel. There's nothing I can do
Speaker 1: about it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, as a parent, you're just looking for peace and quiet.
Speaker 4: Sometimes you're like whatever, you're able to sit and watch
Speaker 4: and not cry. I'm in. I'm one hundred percent in
Speaker 4: on right, and.
Speaker 1: I don't think anyone would ever ever blame me for that.
Speaker 3: Obviously.
Speaker 4: Great if it's you know, murder Mystery on sixty minutes, Great,
Speaker 4: whatever you want, bro.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, Hey, how was your first second Father's Day?
Speaker 4: I know it's weird to say that second Father's Day.
Speaker 4: I feel so old. It was good. I just I
Speaker 4: don't want to be celebrated. You know. I try to
Speaker 4: be the best dad possible, and I think I do
Speaker 4: pretty well knock on wood. But Ashley obviously is much
Speaker 4: more hands on in terms of taking care of him
Speaker 4: because I'm at the shop all the time. So it's like, listen,
Speaker 4: I don't want to be celebrated. Father's Day is very sweet,
Speaker 4: but I don't need anything. I don't want anything, just
Speaker 4: a happy Father's Day. I give Dawson a kiss, That's
Speaker 4: all I want. So she was very nice. She ended
Speaker 4: up getting me a gift. It was a softball bag
Speaker 4: where I could put all my bats and balls, so
Speaker 4: that was awesome.
Speaker 5: I know, tight tight.
Speaker 4: I know I loved it, and she got me a
Speaker 4: Superman card, which was so sweet. But yeah, it was fine.
Speaker 4: I mean, you know, I felt bad. I didn't get
Speaker 4: my dad anything.
Speaker 5: Probably should have.
Speaker 3: Did Ashley get hurt at anything?
Speaker 5: Yeah? She got him an It's so weird.
Speaker 4: His favorite color is orange and he loves orange T shirts.
Speaker 4: And apparently he had an orange T shirt that something
Speaker 4: happened to it. Maybe it shrunk, it faded, I'm not sure.
Speaker 4: So she went to Dix and got him an orange
Speaker 4: under Armoor T shirt and he freaked out.
Speaker 3: Nice.
Speaker 5: It's little things in life, really unbelievable.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's great. Yeah, Caitlin and I don't even think
Speaker 1: the registered Father's Day. I don't mean I think we
Speaker 1: talked about it at all.
Speaker 2: Did I texted my stepdad at like eight pm on
Speaker 2: the East coast?
Speaker 6: John Kimminick.
Speaker 1: That's great.
Speaker 6: Yeah, nice, that's we didn't really do anything.
Speaker 1: We don't have kids, well.
Speaker 6: They don't talk to our fathers.
Speaker 1: You could have celebrated me. I'm a freaking father, dog father.
Speaker 6: Yeah, Happy Father's Day.
Speaker 3: I'm a dog.
Speaker 1: Father on the day of my daughter's wedding.
Speaker 5: Are you close with your stepdad, Kaitlin, Not really.
Speaker 2: No, No, I'm close with I should have text my grandpa. Shoot,
Speaker 2: we were in Bali and it was so much was
Speaker 2: going on. I totally forgot.
Speaker 3: Let's text him right now.
Speaker 5: And they're close with you, right Vegas?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, they live like five doors down.
Speaker 6: They just moved next door to us. It's so funny.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you should just stop in and then just like
Speaker 4: bring them a you know, cupcake or something, be like,
Speaker 4: I'm so sorry, Happy Father's Day.
Speaker 1: We should invite them over for pizza tonight.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we should and we will pizza. Well for my birthday,
Speaker 2: he took my Crumble cookies, so technically I got him
Speaker 2: Crumble cookies.
Speaker 1: No that we're not inviting him over for Pete said
Speaker 1: they should invite us over and feed up.
Speaker 5: Yeah, still cake, that's bull.
Speaker 4: Did you see the Flash movie? Oh yeah, I saw
Speaker 4: the Flash. I mean, like I do, I don't want
Speaker 4: to get into it.
Speaker 1: No, I mean I like your nonsensical rants about uh
Speaker 1: DC versus Marvel, So are you serious? Yeah, it's it's
Speaker 1: good filler. It's good filler because sometimes it's nice for
Speaker 1: us to sit back and turn our brains off for
Speaker 1: a little bit relate to this.
Speaker 3: Wait, can't get into it. I do. I want to.
Speaker 3: I want to share my thoughts on the Flash.
Speaker 5: Oh you saw the movie?
Speaker 1: No I have. I know, of course, of course that
Speaker 1: I love the Flash. He's actually one of my top
Speaker 1: three favorite superheroes. He's one of the coolest superheroes in
Speaker 1: my day.
Speaker 5: Can go see the movie.
Speaker 1: No, modern cinema has ruined superhero movies. They have They
Speaker 1: know that they have a built in fan base, and
Speaker 1: they can slack off and make the best movie and
Speaker 1: it's still going to get one hundred million in the
Speaker 1: box office, no problem. That's what's really bad with those
Speaker 1: superhero moves. And that's why I hate them so much,
Speaker 1: because they know that the fans will watch them no
Speaker 1: matter what, because they love the Flash, they love Superman,
Speaker 1: they love Batman, and so they can just put out
Speaker 1: a crap crap quality content, not quality content, and still
Speaker 1: people show up. And so they're ruining these franchises.
Speaker 4: I disagree because I think audience, if you, I doubt
Speaker 4: you follow this stuff. But the Flash is bombing at
Speaker 4: the box office. It's doing shot Dad, It's gonna go down.
Speaker 4: It's probably one of the biggest box office bombs all
Speaker 4: the time.
Speaker 2: The actor is pretty controversial, right, yeah, yeah, actor very much.
Speaker 4: Yeah ah No, I think it's a part of it.
Speaker 4: So Ezra Miller's has some uh past where they have
Speaker 4: been arrested and they've choked a woman.
Speaker 5: It's like weird.
Speaker 4: But I also I think that the flash is it's
Speaker 4: just a I think the reason. Man, there's so much
Speaker 4: to go into why I think it's failing. Have you
Speaker 4: guys heard anything about James Gunn getting hired at DC
Speaker 4: and he's supposed to reboot everything, And there's this whole
Speaker 4: thing because Henry Cavill's not coming back a Superman. We've
Speaker 4: talked about it on this podcast before. I won't go
Speaker 4: into it, but it's not doing about the box office
Speaker 4: for a multitude of reasons. And unfortunately, I also did
Speaker 4: not like the movie, which hurts me because I really
Speaker 4: wanted to love it, because I've heard that it's a
Speaker 4: love letter to DC films of the past, and it's
Speaker 4: a good movie in itself and it's fun. But unfortunately
Speaker 4: for me, it was just a giant miscalculation. And there's
Speaker 4: cameos in the movie that I truly just felt were grotesque.
Speaker 1: Isn't isn't Ben Affleck Batman in it?
Speaker 4: Yeah, but he's they show him in the marketing, so
Speaker 4: he's he's not in it much, unfortunately, and he's one
Speaker 4: of the he's so good as Batman Man, it sucks
Speaker 4: he's not.
Speaker 1: Gonna Ben Affleck on a podcast like last week. And
Speaker 1: he because he's played Batman now like five or six
Speaker 1: times in smaller roles, he's got the bigger ones obviously,
Speaker 1: and he was like, yeah, man, it was weird in
Speaker 1: the Flash. I feel like I finally figured out how
Speaker 1: to play Batman. I'm not a big Ben Affleck fan,
Speaker 1: but I listened to him on the SmartLess podcast, which
Speaker 1: is fantastic, and it made me love Ben Affleck like
Speaker 1: it made me appreciated my him so much more.
Speaker 3: He seems like such a cool guy.
Speaker 1: But yeah, he was saying, he was like, yeah, this
Speaker 1: small little role that I played in the Flash was
Speaker 1: finally for the first time as Batman for where I
Speaker 1: felt like I knew exactly how to play Batman.
Speaker 5: Dude.
Speaker 4: I love Benny boy, I mean East Coast Boston guy.
Speaker 4: I've always loved Thatt Affleck because I think he's down
Speaker 4: to earth and I love him and Jalo together. They're
Speaker 4: one of my favorite celebrity couples because I love the
Speaker 4: We've talked about it. She's like glitz, glam, she is queen.
Speaker 4: And then there was just like Ben Affleck Boston guy
Speaker 4: who smokes and drinks Duncan and like you know, has
Speaker 4: had drinking problems and just like divorced and he's just
Speaker 4: like such a in New Englander.
Speaker 5: I love it so much, and.
Speaker 4: The fact that those two are together, it's like, that's
Speaker 4: the coolest thing.
Speaker 2: Ah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the movie's okay, but it was nice going out,
Speaker 4: So I just love going to the theaters man, And
Speaker 4: you know, box office is not what it used to be.
Speaker 4: Going to the movies is not what it used to be,
Speaker 4: which makes me so sad because theaters can never die.
Speaker 3: So we went area.
Speaker 1: I think the movie going experience is still it still
Speaker 1: is pretty great, right, Like yeah, no, you're right, these
Speaker 1: nice seats, Yeah, that's kind of what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: Like you can get the nicer seats, you can get
Speaker 1: the food brought to you. The movie going experience is
Speaker 1: still awesome. Even just yesterday we were out at dinner
Speaker 1: and we're like, we should go see a movie because
Speaker 1: we haven't seen it in a while. I just agree
Speaker 1: that there maybe aren't as good of movies, Like there's
Speaker 1: less movies coming out every year where.
Speaker 3: You're like, we have to go see that in theaters,
Speaker 3: you know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would say, I think what people want is
Speaker 4: people like myself were so over the overuse of CGI
Speaker 4: and computer generated effects, like I don't want to see
Speaker 4: a card like what looks like a cartoon jumping around.
Speaker 4: What's great and what brings myself and people to the
Speaker 4: movies is the in camera action. That's why Top Gun
Speaker 4: Maverick did so well, because it's act Tom Cruise in
Speaker 4: a fighter pilot, you know, and it's like it's it's
Speaker 4: so real and visceral. And that's why I think Oppenheimer,
Speaker 4: your boy Christopher Nolan, is gonna.
Speaker 5: Do really well. That guy.
Speaker 4: Sorry, Brady Buzzer two seconds. I don't know if you
Speaker 4: guys know much about Openheimer. Do you know anything about
Speaker 4: this then? This movie coming out?
Speaker 3: But I do. I really want to watch it though, dude.
Speaker 4: So it's Christopher Nolan's new movie. It's about the Manhattan Project,
Speaker 4: the creation and a nuclear bomb. This guy, this director,
Speaker 4: Christopher Nolan, he dropped a nuclear bomb to record it.
Speaker 4: In camera. I'm not joking you. I don't know how
Speaker 4: he was able to do it.
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, how do you even pull that off?
Speaker 4: I don't know, and I don't even know how much
Speaker 4: it costs. This guy dropped a small nuclear weapon to
Speaker 4: film it in camera because he didn't want computer generated effects.
Speaker 3: It's funny that you bring up.
Speaker 1: It's funny you bring up Chris Nolan because I was
Speaker 1: gonna say, I wish Chris Nolan would do like a
Speaker 1: movie like The Flash, because the Batman movies were so phenomenal.
Speaker 1: The Christalan Bad movies were so phenomenal. If like The
Speaker 1: Flash should be great. But yeah, I do really want
Speaker 1: to see Oppenheimer. We're gonna go see I think, what's
Speaker 1: that movie that we talked about last week? No hard Feelings,
Speaker 1: No hard feelings? Oh yeah, that looks pretty funny. So
Speaker 1: we're gonna see that maybe tonight.
Speaker 5: Barbie's coming out soon.
Speaker 1: Want to talk talk about like, I think like they've
Speaker 1: been talking about Barbie coming out for years now.
Speaker 6: I've had so much money behind it. They have to
Speaker 6: advertise it so hard.
Speaker 1: They've been advertising it for like only like three months
Speaker 1: before the movie comes out.
Speaker 3: It's been like a year.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Anyways, we got Brady buzzed.
Speaker 1: Let's see, that's so sad. You want to talk about
Speaker 1: before we before we bid a do here, you were
Speaker 1: trying to build a bike for your little boy.
Speaker 3: How'd that go?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 4: No, it was stupid. Ashley posted this on Instagram.
Speaker 5: There's just so.
Speaker 4: These things are so difficult to put together, and they're
Speaker 4: plastic and they break easily, and they're not they're just
Speaker 4: they just don't come with the proper things to put
Speaker 4: them together. And so anyway, it was this little plastic
Speaker 4: bike that Ashley wanted me to put together, even though
Speaker 4: he can't even ride it yet. I'm like, he can't
Speaker 4: ride this bike yet. She's like, well, it's made for
Speaker 4: eighteen months old. I'm like, yeah, but he's just gonna
Speaker 4: fall off. It's not because he's got like his lower
Speaker 4: remote control thing. He likes that, he enjoys that. Let's
Speaker 4: just stick him in there and go on our way.
Speaker 4: But anyway, I'm trying to put this bike together. It's plastic,
Speaker 4: it's so cheap. But I you know, I feel bad
Speaker 4: because it was definitely a gift from like my cousin
Speaker 4: or something like that, and you know, it's the thought
Speaker 4: that counts. But this thing was just terrible, and so
Speaker 4: I'm it didn't even come with screws. It came with
Speaker 4: like just these plastic little things that you had to
Speaker 4: twist on. And so I'm trying to twist it on
Speaker 4: and it's not working. And then I got to get
Speaker 4: Ashley's help because there's I have to get some leverage
Speaker 4: in order to put the wheels on. So anyway, I
Speaker 4: threw it across the garage and we threw it out.
Speaker 1: Is it a bicycle or is it like a glider
Speaker 1: that doesn't have pedals.
Speaker 4: No, it's like a it's like a plastic bike, dude,
Speaker 4: wheel the wheels were plastic. Oh yeah, it was very
Speaker 4: It was like you go, it's like twenty dollars at Walmart. Again,
Speaker 4: it's the thought that counts. Really appreciate somebody wanted to
Speaker 4: get a bike for Dawson, but like.
Speaker 1: We'll get a gift where you're like, thank you, but
Speaker 1: this is going straight into the trash. Oh, and so's
Speaker 1: all the worse because you feel guilty about it.
Speaker 4: Well, then I feel guilty because of course Dawson's sitting there,
Speaker 4: and because he's outside with us, because Ashley's with me,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, hey, I need your help for a
Speaker 4: second because I need you to hold this up while
Speaker 4: I try to twist this thing because I can't do
Speaker 4: it myself because it's just this thing is so stupid.
Speaker 4: So anyway, so I got frustrated and then I throwed
Speaker 4: across the garage and then she's like, you know, I
Speaker 4: was just reading how you shouldn't show anger in front
Speaker 4: of your child because he's gonna pick up on it.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, Ashley, I just he's fine. He no,
Speaker 4: he's not throwing it. He can't even throw two feet, like,
Speaker 4: he's not throwing anything across the floor. So anyway, so
Speaker 4: we got into an argument about that, and then the
Speaker 4: rest of the day was fine.
Speaker 1: I feel like, you don't really get angry, but when
Speaker 1: you sure you get angry sometimes by showing a little
Speaker 1: bit anger, it's not really gonna affect him. He's already
Speaker 1: got that anger inside of him. Whatever you have inside
Speaker 1: of you, he's got that inside of him too.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's good. So he's just inheriting my anger problems.
Speaker 1: You don't.
Speaker 3: But I'm saying you.
Speaker 1: Don't have anger problems. I'm just saying you know, whatever
Speaker 1: you have, he's already got.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't really yell I Ashley gets mad at me,
Speaker 4: because when I do get angry, I just need to
Speaker 4: release it. So I'm the type of guy and it's
Speaker 4: probably not a good quality to have, but.
Speaker 3: I'll just like scream.
Speaker 4: Yeah I would time and scream, but I'll just I know,
Speaker 4: I'll say the F word.
Speaker 5: She doesn't like that, and so.
Speaker 1: I'm like, instead of saying the F word, you should
Speaker 1: say something like pickle.
Speaker 4: Like, yeah, that's so every time. So instead of screaming
Speaker 4: the F word, I'll just start screaming pickles. And then
Speaker 4: so my neighbor could be like some are my neighbor,
Speaker 4: My next door neighbors a psycho. He just goes outside
Speaker 4: and screams. He loves pickles so much. Either hates him
Speaker 4: or loves him, and he wants everybody in the neighborhood
Speaker 4: to know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's great. Best of luck with your anger management.
Speaker 5: Hey, thanks, it's all right.
Speaker 4: We're gonna get him another bike and then it will
Speaker 4: be a lot better and he'll enjoy and it'll be
Speaker 4: phenomenal for everybody involved, including Ashley and especially Dawson.
Speaker 1: Before we say goodbye, for this episode, I want to
Speaker 1: ask you one question. Have you ever seen the movie
Speaker 1: Anger Management? Yeah? Of course, so that's what I thought
Speaker 1: everyone's seen. It's defined a generation. Kaylan has never seen
Speaker 1: this movie, and I try to get her to watch
Speaker 1: it one time, and I was like, you just have
Speaker 1: to watch it up until a certain point when they
Speaker 1: sings in the car.
Speaker 3: I feel pretty teap. Oh so much.
Speaker 1: Adam Sandler Yeah, and Jack Nicholas, Jack Nicholson, Nicholson, Yeah,
Speaker 1: not Nicholas, he's a golfer, And we couldn't even get
Speaker 1: to that point. I'm like, Kaylen has missed out on
Speaker 1: so many great movies from my childhood that I have
Speaker 1: tried to get her to watch and she loses interest.
Speaker 3: In the first fifteen he died.
Speaker 2: Adam sandlery for a long time, and now I am
Speaker 2: coming around to him.
Speaker 6: So I haven't seen most of his movie.
Speaker 1: Right, And that's true because he did make from nineteen
Speaker 1: ninety five to two thousand and five. He literally couldn't
Speaker 1: miss and you missed out on all of those made
Speaker 1: a movie a year, and you missed out on all
Speaker 1: of those fantastic movies.
Speaker 6: I'm catching up now.
Speaker 5: You know what's funny.
Speaker 4: We were just talking about Adam Sandler, Ashley and I
Speaker 4: and we find him so comforting. Yeah, watching or listening
Speaker 4: to him, especially in his older years, because he was
Speaker 4: on Sesame Street and he did his song for Almo
Speaker 4: and then we you know.
Speaker 5: Like Big Dad.
Speaker 4: We were thinking about Big Daddy and we were thinking
Speaker 4: about like his later years, and he is very There's
Speaker 4: something very warm about Adam Sandler.
Speaker 1: I think it's because we associate him with our childhood,
Speaker 1: which we always get a little nostalgic about. So Kaylen,
Speaker 1: since she doesn't associate him with being a little bit younger,
Speaker 1: maybe you don't have the same like emotional attachment to
Speaker 1: him as we do.
Speaker 6: He just always annoyed me.
Speaker 4: But it sucks Cayln that you don't like because you're
Speaker 4: very much like Ashley. Where I will try to show dude,
Speaker 4: Ashley will give not a time of day to Dumb
Speaker 4: and Dumber, Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore. She hates them, she
Speaker 4: hates them all. She'll never try to like them. And
Speaker 4: it's sad for me because I know every line in
Speaker 4: all these movies is all I do. All I want
Speaker 4: to do is quote Dumb and Dumber and Tommy boy
Speaker 4: and happy Gilmore, and it's just like, there's so many
Speaker 4: quotable moments that I have throughout the day, and I'll
Speaker 4: say them. I'll either say them and she doesn't get it,
Speaker 4: or be I don't say them, and it just makes
Speaker 4: me sad to know that a piece of be is gone.
Speaker 1: Big gulps, huh. Well, see you later. We're gonna do
Speaker 1: it for this week's episode of Help we Suck at
Speaker 1: being newlyweds.
Speaker 3: We're again.
Speaker 1: We're so sorry for being a day late on getting
Speaker 1: this out there, but we can appreciate that you guys
Speaker 1: can understand what we were going through. Young Kaitlen over
Speaker 1: here is feeling much better. She's breathing through her nose
Speaker 1: for the first time in a week. You're doing great.
Speaker 1: You're doing great, sweetheart. We have obviously our our regular
Speaker 1: episodes coming up later this week. I think Thursday will
Speaker 1: probably put one out and then we'll put one out
Speaker 1: on Sunday, and then I think after that we're gonna
Speaker 1: have the July fourth episode, and then you guys should.
Speaker 6: Definitely listen to.
Speaker 5: This.
Speaker 1: You feel uncomfortable freaking me, we'll just get us out
Speaker 1: of here.
Speaker 7: Then.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much. For listening to this week's
Speaker 1: episode of Help We Suck At Being Newlyweds. Be sure
Speaker 1: to tune in later this week, where maybe we suck
Speaker 1: just a little bit less. Thanks for listening, Follow us
Speaker 1: on Instagram at help We Suck at.
Speaker 2: Being Newlyweds and email us at Newlyweds at iHeartRadio dot com.
Speaker 1: Make sure to write us a review and leave us
Speaker 1: five stars. We'll see you next time.